#so... /yeet/

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

so in an attempt to actually use positive thinking, anytime i fuck up and my brain reacts as if ive cause a minor apocalyptic event, i compare my fuck up to the 4 minute fuck up committed by the crew of the uss william d porter.

and only today, as i was having to explain what happened to my mom when i was explaining the whole comparison thing, did i realise that most people dont know about it and ive decided that needs to change because its objectively hilarious.

...which is a weird thing to say about an event that occured on a warship in 1943, specifically november 14th.

see the uss william d porter was a fletcher-class destroyer but you dont need to know what that means, just that she had guns that went bang bang and that she was escorting another ship, the uss iowa, to cairo.

while they were on their way there, they performed some gun trials like testing the anti-aircraft guns or the torpedos. and while they were running a torpedo drill, the crew of the porter managed to fire a live torpedo straight at the iowa which you know, in terms of a list of things to do while escorting a ship, shooting a torpedo at them is not on that list.

especially if the president of the united states is on board.

yeah so fdr was on board and the gun trials were actually his idea, and part of the trials was that they were conducted under radio silence.

and that means the crew of the porter couldnt just call the iowa to be like "move out the way, we accidentally shot a torpedo at you."

but they did have signal lamps and you know, the signalman on board was trained to signal this exact kind of message.

...and uh never mind, the signalman did manage to successfully tell the iowa that a torpedo was coming toward them but wasnt as successful when it came to the direction the torpedo was coming from.

not all hope is lost though because the signalman could still use the signal lamp to correct his previous mistake and-, never mind, he announced that the porter was reversing, which she wasnt.

yeah so at catastrophic mistake number 3, they broke radio silence to warn the iowa and she managed to turn out of the way just in time which meant no one got hurt. and even though the inquiry into the incident led to chief torpedoman (fantastic job title btw) lawton dawson being sentences to hard labour, fdr intervened and waved away his sentence, saying it was all an accident.

but yeah, so thats my new measure for "how much did i really fuck up?" and when i compared accidentally picking up a pencil case without a tag on it in wilko, turns out it was a very minor fuck-up. yes, the cashier had to ask another worker to grab a duplicate so they could scan the barcode, but i didnt nearly kill the president during wartime via accidental friendly fire

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

“why sister daniel and blond phil? this is just phil! this is phil all the time! this is not dan before the clock strikes 12, this is just phil now!” no no i can accept that phil is blond now like i will concede that this:

is phil. but this:

is NOT phil. this is a butch lesbian with a motorcycle who is dating sister daniel. nothing you say will convince me of anything else ok. that’s not phil that’s the head of DOB leading the march before going to pick up her girlfriend from the convent for hot lesbian sex. they have nothing to do with dan and phil. separate entities. stop lesbian erasure 😤

[yuukirita]

I can just Imagine Bee going to hug Megs the next time they see each other because He really doesn't know Megs is like... A bad guy now. He's just happy to see his friend.

[missmolsa]

*she should've been at the club voice* they should've been. Having a normal Saturday at the beach

[aratribow]

Jy and his two guard dogs (or cats)

[lurkinglurkerwholurks]

“Of course I’m faking it,” Dick snapped, smile gone as if it had never been. Jason didn’t back up, but it was a near thing. “You think I’m happy all the time? It’s a mask, Jay. Like your anger or B’s stupid Easter Island statue bit he does or how Tim is always fine. I can’t afford to lash out like you do. Can’t afford to close off like he does. And someone around here has to be fucking civil to clean up after the rest of you. So yeah, I fake it. I smile when I don’t feel like it and laugh when I want to cry and take all your crap and don’t shove it back on you. It’s not lying, it’s called being an adult and a fucking decent person, and if you don’t understand that then its time for you to grow the fuck up.”

[bluerosefox]

Her Astrophel and Sterling

hmmm

Hmmmmmmmm

You know what.

You know those AU's where the Batfam finds or learns about either hidden or thought to be dead Al Ghul Danny! with a deaged/daughter Dani (Ellie) (I should know, I created a few of those storylines) but what if, now hear me out, what if instead of them finding Danny first its Talia.

Do I want Talia discovering her thought to be dead son to be alive? Yes. Do I want her to find him while investigating Amity Park when the League gets reports of 'Lazarus creatures/water'? Yes.

DO I WANT HER TO KNOCK ON THE FENTON'S DOOR, fully ready to pretend/honey talk her way into the house to uncover what the Fenton's know, ONLY TO MEET A LITTLE ELLIE?!

YES.

Ellie whose eyes and hair look like a copy of her Beloved but she can see bits and pieces of herself as well. Talia knows the child in front of her was not fully her's though but everything makes sense when she hears a voice, a voice she hasn't heard in ages but as a mother just knows, speak out.

"Ellie! I thought I said do not answer the door my Sterling."

"But Daddy, yous was busy fighting the hotdoggys!"

Talia's eyes widen when she finally catches sight of familiar black hair and blue eyes.

and she could only lightly whisper a old nickname she hasn't dared uttered in ages, a name she secretly gave her son due to his love of the stars "Astrophel..."

[chleb-uwu]

@okamiflare247 He'll go for the over-the-shoulder throw, but aside of that, yeah- I can work with that! ( kinda- sequel to this post)

[macomico]

en garde 🤺

[roipecheur]

Concept: Dickbin who enjoys being thrown like a cat

Batman took him along to a JL meeting, and they're all standing around talking while Robin is doing cartwheels and climbing on shit over in the corner. Suddenly, Robin does a running leap and fucking barrels right at Batman like he's going to attack, and Batman, without missing a beat, catches him one-handed and throws him across the room.

The rest of the League watches in horror as this four-foot-nothing kid who maybe weighs eighty pounds flies through the air--and then does a series of flips and lands on his feet like a cat.

Robin grins wild and gap-toothed like he's having the time of his life (which he might be), and he runs at Batman again.

Ten minutes later, Superman, Wonder Woman, and the Flash are all chucking this manically giggling kid through the air while Green Lantern prepares to catch Robin with his ring if it actually looks like he's gonna hit something, and Batman sits off to the side, covertly stretching his arm.

[danandfuckingjonlmao]

dnp are so much worse than we could ever be. they bully us for being like omg they touched and then sit there screaming and giggling and kicking their feet because omg dan helped phil sort his fringe out in 2015 that’s soooo sweet!1!!1!!!!! 😭😭😭 omg did you see how they communicated without words?? 😱 they are so in tune with each other they have such a powerful connection 🥹🥰😆 so cute how dan was looking out for phil soulmate shit fr 🥺 let’s watch it again 😝😍🤣😵🤭🫨 like shut the fuck up?? fucking phannies?? you’re so embarrassing??

[egophiliac]

starting off with an amuse-bouche of some of my initial favorite bits! y'all, this update was WILD.

[ominouspuff]

Continuing this fix-it AU where Commander Fox springboards off the deep end into a full-on rebellion, featuring unlikely allies belatedly finding out they are allies far too late to stop being allies but then again it’s never too late not to throw a terrifyingly destructive fit about it (Maul)

Close-up’s under the cut

[espikola]

[sophsun1]

#mecore

[kenchann]

sweet dreams