#so why say any of that and not just do oh yeah the church helped me when i was young. like very sus dc
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it's so wild that the priest part is what people latched onto and remember when flashpoint!jason both was a drug addict and then was in brother blood's apocalypse cult before he died. and then resurrected again.
#sometimes i see people just freaking out about the priest part and its like there are more bizarre things afoot! the priest is the normalest#now if its to forget those other two things i completely get it#really hate the backstory though cause it just feeds into the Without Bruce He'd be A Criminal which is classist as hell#as it stands none of that needed to be there. it doesnt matter to traci's story imo#so why say any of that and not just do oh yeah the church helped me when i was young. like very sus dc#anyway. yeah#jason todd#dc
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#my thing is always gonna be this#how are you upset with me because im trying to have a boundary???#how are you upset with ME that YOURE ALWAYS OVERSTEPPING MY BOUNDARIES#like yes i babysitter im a babysitter but you cant expect me to babysit just cause you need a babysitter!?? like what??!#“oh we needed to go to another church and the kids didnt wanna go” okay?? so you just dropped them off without saying anything to me??!#you didnt even ask if i could you just assumed i would cause im home??? like i dont deserve a moment???#like im not a parent#i dont have any kids and i definitely dont fucking plan on it so why tf do i feel like a single mother in my day to day??#why do i never have any free time to myself why is my free time volunteered to making sure children are supervised??!#“well since you decided this im just gonna come get the kids” yeah im within my fucking right so why are you phrasing it like im wrong#god ive never been this frustrated that im fucking crying like can i have some fuckinf breathing space AWAY from other ppls kids#blymi rants#update:: my sister did in fact come and get them#and told the kids “yall cant stay home cause auntie doesnt feel like watching yall”#definitely feels like shes putting the blame on me cool cool cool#just peachy.#love that for me lets make it MY fault whatever#god i really cannot catch a fucking break#and trust and believe im gonna have to hear some stupid ass better than thou speech about how i need to help out my sister#“because shes a student a mother AND working” as if any of those choices are my fucking concern yep wonderful#especially for a sister. that while i love her. feels entitled to peoples help because shes “going through so much”#and now i cant even fucking relax or draw or write because im so fucking pissed#which is why i wanted the afternoon to myself ANYWAYS so no matter what the fucking days a goddamn bust for me regardless
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Earthborn (Hazbin Hotel Reader Insert)
Oh geez this made me realize I have religious trama while writing this.
Spoilers if you haven't actually watched hazbin hotel.
Also apparently the characters are taalll. Minus Niffty
Just test on how I'll write hazbin hotel so to be continued or not
"Go fuck yourself pompous prick!" (Y/n) yelled at Adam, their anger getting to them.
"Don't speak to me like that! You came from me!" He responded. "You are alive because I fucked-."
"Up, yeah I know. Being God's chosen people, Adam and Eve. Cast out after eating the apple, had two sons and one killed the other. Blah blah, I was raised in church." They told him. "And in a club in elementary school about the Bible so I know a bunch."
Charlie and Vaggie looked at each other in confusion, (Y/n) never talked about these parts of their past.
"Then why are you arguing with me?!"
"Because if you get to be here after getting banished from the garden by God himself then I see no reason why Sinners that want change themselves to get shouldn't." (Y/n) said staring at Adam with their arms crossed.
The Angels watching started to whisper to themselves.
"(Y/n), you know why you are here." Said Sara. "Please do not get involved with the next issue until we get to that."
(Y/n) looked way up to where Sara and Emily were seated. "Very well, apologizes I just wanted to get that out of the way." They bowed while speaking before standing straight. "...This is probably has to do in how I've been in hell?"
"Yes, (Y/n) (Middle Name) (L/n), you are still earthborn, not yet a sinner or a winner, have been in hell for just less than a year. How did you get there?"
Shocked faces across the room from everyone minus (Y/n), who looked uncomfortable with being called their full name.
"(Y/n) is that true?" Asked Charlie, surprised at the information. She knew (Y/n) didn't look like a sinner, kept a more humanoid look than most and was shorter than most of the people at the hotel.
"Yeah, I'm still human or well Earthborn as it was called. I didn't tell any of you since I didn't want you to worry." (Y/n) told Charlie look at her and Vaggie. "How did you even know?" They asked the Seraphim in charge. "I have an... okay disguise." Looking at themselves, with pointy ears,sharper teeth, and their eyes were not a normal color. They atleast didn't look human enough to question.
"We can tell by your soul. It still shows your the weight of your sins or what not. Not like I forget what one of my millions of too many great-grandchildren look like." Said Adam and with a grin and a snap of his fingers, (Y/n) felt the necklace they wore break in peices as the magic it held broke with it.
"I would rather be dead than be related to you, prick." (Y/n) said with deadpan look.
"It took awhile to realize you weren't just a weird sinner soul so we told Sara when we noticed all of you earlier." Said Lute, finally butting in before Adam could argue again.
"(Y/n) how did you get into hell?" Sara asked again, tried of this again.
"Not sure? Its kinda just a blank space between being on earth and then in hell." They answered with a shrug. "I found someone to help me somewhat look the part and then Vaggie found me while I was wondering around."
The earthborn was complete being too nonchalant with being in hell.
"Why didn't you tell anyone about not being from hell?" Asked Emily, earning a look from Sara.
"Well I mean at first for safety and then to keep anyone from worried about me? I'm kinda more... fragile compared to anyone else since demons and sinner have... an easier time getting up from a normal serious injury than I would." (Y/n) having to think of what they said before they actually saying it.
"I threw you off a building into a fight, how did you survive that?" Questioned Vaggie.
"Well Angel Dust caught me slash soften the fall and I mostly hide until Husk picked me up to leave."
"Why have you been helping Priness Charlie Morningstar with her project even when you are earthborn?" Asked Sara.
"Because it's a good cause? If I was a sinner I would want the hotel to be there to even give me a small chance to get into heaven even if you all don't believe in it. It's a humane way of handling the population down there. If redemption can happen to people while they are alive, why wouldn't it happen while they are dead and in hell? As along as they put in the effort to be good person, they should be a good person."
"If you know the words of the Bible why didn't you spread it down there?"
"Because being pushy to the wrong person could end me? And they really don't really think highly of you all. Plus for me if you heard how people like me would end up there for something out of their control, I would have trama with it."
"Why are you talking about it now if you have an issue with the Bible and God?" Questioned Adam.
"Oh, mostly because I'm pissed off. I don't have an issue with God, at all. It's people with opinions that wrote the book that got translated to many time with out checking by people who also had opinions. The Bible is.. fine. Heck, I didn't even knew there was a Lilith involved until Charlie told me."
(Y/n) sighed, taking a deep breath.
"What's gonna happen now? Are you going to kill me? Actual make me a sinner? Send me back making seem crazy or thinking this is all a weird dream until I actually die?" They asked. "Because if you send me back crazy, I'm gonna actually kill myself."
"No! Let's not do that, please." Pleded Emily to Sara, scared for (Y/n)'s safety.
"Of course, I wouldn't want you to do that." Said Sara.
"Because the Bible says it's a sin or because you actually don't want me too?" Questioned (Y/n), they were tired of this.
"They could become an Exorcists, it would be funny." Said Adam, laughing at the thought of (Y/n) killing their friends.
"How many times do I have to tell you I would rather die than be anything associated with you?"
"You're soul has yet to be judged but you've seen more than any earthborn have seen in many decades. You could stay in heaven as Winner or angel. We could send you back to earth. Which would you want to do?"
"I want to continue to help Charlie see this though." Said (Y/n).
"Your soul would be damned forever, (Y/n) as a sinner. I would not let that happen to any earthborn in your place in good conscious."
"Then send me back as I am. When I die, wherever that may be judged me as I will be."
"(Y/n), you're too young for-."
"It's Hell, I know but it can be nice when you get use to it just like Earth. Please just let me help until I'm ready to go home."
"...Very well, I'll give you till a month time to sort this out for yourself."
Gives you enough time to help for get set for extermination.
#platonic hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin hotel#Charlie morningstar#Vaggie#Sara Seraphim#emily seraphim#hazbin hotel adam#happy he died#hazbin lute#only says like one thing#reader insert#platonic#this is mostly a test of how people would react and how i wrote#got carried away with trauma so um yeah#did not know i had that trauma
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୨୧ GLIMPSES OF THE LUSTFUL
𝝑𝝔 cw : blasphemy kink???, churchboy!Jeongin, toys, smut
𝝑𝝔 a/n : the years of my life spent in the Catholic church came in clutch with this fic
Growing up Catholic had its perks, but its drawbacks as well. The tradwife stereotypes for women along with the general theme of sexual repression.
You had grown up with Jeongin, going to church together and going to the same Catholic school with the boy. Over the years, you had lost your faith, Jeongin however only grew in his faith, it never bothered you, and your lack of faith never bothered him.
Eventually, you both went off to the same college, a few states away, and figured it would be easier to live together. It was easier then having to make new friends and less risky than having complete strangers be your roommates.
"My theology professor is trying to kill me, I think," you joke to Jeongin over dinner.
"How so?"
"Because I'm not religious, and I told him that, and he started like interrogating me, it was weird," you confess, taking a bite of cereal.
"Is he religious?"
"I suppose so, I mean I told him that I was raised Catholic, so he started assuming the worst," you explain.
"Isn't that religious discrimination?"
"I don't know what to call it, but it was weird," you shrug it off.
"Sounds weird, but any whom," Jeongin changes the subject, "tomorrow I'm leaving early to help with this fundraiser at church, so don't be surprised if I'm not here when you wake up tomorrow."
Jeongin's whole weekends revolved around church, whether it was because he was helping plan a youth trip or assisting the nuns or even helping run a fundraiser, he kept busy with the volunteer work. And of course he was also an avid participant in Sunday Mass, communion, and other traditions.
"m'kay," you figure, rubbing your tired eyes, "my mom and dad are coming over tomorrow," you inform him.
"Oh, fun," he retorts sarcastically.
"Yeah, fun," you say in that same sarcastic tone as him.
"D'you need help like hiding anything?" Jeongin asks timidly.
"Hiding anything?" you ask.
"Like," Jeongin blushes, hiding his face in his hands before he speaks, "s-sex stuff."
"Oh, I mean if you wouldn't mind?"
"I just don't want your parents to freak out on you, remember last time?"
How could you forget the last time your parents came over and they accidentally found a condom in your bathroom, immediately going into a five hour long lecture about how they expected better from you and that you needed to go to a confessional to be forgiven for your sins of sexual impurity.
"Yeah, trust me I remember," you chuckle, "that would be nice, I have all that shit in a box, so I'll just give you the box."
You rise up from your seat at the dining table and walk into your room, grabbing the medium sized box from the closet and walking into the living room with it when suddenly, you trip, and the contents of the box spill everywhere.
"Ow, fuck," you groan, clenching your knee, which you hit on the ground.
Jeongin is quick to stand up and rush to your side, helping you up. You watch as his face eventually turns to the spilled contents of the box. "What in the fuck is that?" he questions.
Jeongin never swore. He thought swearing was pointless and made someone sound trashy, but here he was, swearing.
"It's a dildo," you whisper an explaination.
"B-but wh-why does it l-look like that?"
"It's supposed to look like a dragon, like, uhm, dick," you explain with an embarrassed tone.
"That's really weird, I hope you know, also that thing is so like big how does it- how do y- how can it- how-"
"A lot of lube, and a lot more patience," you half-joke.
"And what is this?" Jeongin exclaims as he picks up the rose shaped toy.
"I-it's a clit sucker," you explain as you grab it from him and put the toy back in the box.
"And what are these?" he holds up a pair of nipple clamps.
"Nipple clamps," you inform him.
"Why in the hell would anyone ever use something like that," Jeongin speaks to himself.
"Don't knock em till you try em," you insist.
You take the nipple clamps from his grasp and put them back in the box before Jeongin is picking something else up, "and what is this?"
"It's a butt plug."
"But why does it have a tail? Ew wait this thing has been in your butt!?"
"It's clean!" you exclaim, "it has a tail because- well-well because I just like it I d'know?"
"Weird," Jeongin mumbles as he puts the toy in the box.
"And what is this?" he holds up a flogger.
"A flogger, you hit people with it," you explain as you take it from the boy.
"But wouldn't that hurt?"
"That's kind of the point, Jeongin," you hum, "hold out your arm, it's not as bad as you think it is, I promise."
After a moment of thinking it through, Jeongin holds out his arm, you lightly hit him with the flogger, "oh that isn't bad at all," Jeongin hums.
"Mhm," you nod, placing the flogger back in the box.
"Oh, what's this?" Jeongin holds up a tentacle grinder.
"It's a grinder," you tell him.
"What does it do?" he asks sheepishly.
"Well," you pause, embarrassment creeping onto your face, "you like grind on it, like you grind your clit on it."
"Oh," Jeongin's face falls before putting the grinder back in the box.
"I hope you don't think I'm weird or gross or anything now," you confess to him.
"I-I d'think y-your weird," he promises, "I promise, y-you're not weird for having s-sex. It's n-natural."
"But you don't have sex, so I j-"
"Who said I've never had sex?"
You stare at him blankly, "you-you've..."
"Well like it's not sex but like I've masturbated before," he confesses.
Your lips make an o shape as you nod your head, "oh, th-that's good?"
"That's good!?"
"I d'know what to say! I was just surprised!"
"Well I mean I'm human y-you don't think I'm weird do you?"
"No! Of course not!" you insist.
The silence that passes between the two of you is almost deafening. You glance down and that's when you notice it, the bulge in Jeongin's pants. "Je-Jeongin," you mumble.
"I-I-I should go to my room!"
Just as he's about to get up you grab his wrist, the way he looks at you tells you a thousand words. "Stay," you practically plead with him.
"I-I haven't, I don't know how-" he whimpers under your intense gaze.
"I'll teach you," you reassure him, "anything you want, I'll teach you."
No words are exchanged between the two of you as he leans forward and slams your lips onto his own. He's messy and sloppy and inexperienced. "Calm down," you muse to him, "enjoy this, we have all the time in the world," you reassure him.
You gently cup his jaw with your left hand, your right hand running through his hair, "darling, calm down," you mumble against his eager lips.
"Can't get enough of you, d'you know how many nights I've had to listen to you whining and whimpering and falling apart on these things? Hm?" he groans into a kiss, "how I've beat my cock to the thought of you? D'you know about that?"
"Jeongin," you murmur, melting further and further into the kiss, "thought of you too," you confess.
"Want to watch you," he states, breaking apart from the kiss, "I want to watch you fuck yourself, the way you do at night."
That is how you find yourself naked on your couch, Jeongin watching you intently as you ride one of your dildos. "Hmm, so all you do is ride that toy and think of me? That's pathetic," he scoffs, watching you like he's disinterested, but you can tell from the tent in his pants that he is anything but disinterested.
"And all you do is what? Hm? Stroke your cock?" you remark.
"You know, filthy whores like yourself shouldn't fucking talk," Jeongin stands up and kneels next to you, taking your nipple in his mouth, making you gush around the toy, "recite first Corithians 6:18," he demands.
"J-Jeongin," you whine, eyes rolling to the back of your head.
Jeongin is pulling you by your hair, making you look at him, "recite it."
"Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body," you quote.
"That's it honey, yet here you are, riding this fucking toy every night, thinking of me," Jeongin's words are venom, "don't worry though, I'll make a good girl out of you."
You can only whimper at his filthy words.
And that is what started your little taboo tradition, every Sunday night you'd be face down ass up on Jeongin's bed, getting pounded from behind, and you'd only get to cum if you could recite five Bible verses for him.
Jeongin was definitely no priest but he brought you closer to the pearly gates than any real priest ever could.
#bun.writes#bunwritesskz#skz#skz imagines#stray kids#stray kids scenarios#stray kids x you#jeongin hard thoughts#jeongin hard hours#yang jeongin#jeongin smut#jeongin
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King for a Day
MDNI
Youth Pastor!Mingi x GN!Reader
warnings: sex(gross ikr), its just a blowjob, mentions of fingering, throat fucking, spit mention, hair pulling, tears (Dacryphilia), i cant think of anything else ngl
word count: 1.9k (first long fic les gooo)
“You might want to get an early start on your Hail Marys then.”
“In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit..Amen.”
Following along you made a cross on your body. This will not be the only time you do this today, and it certainly won't be the last.Mingi and his father had just moved into town, the new pastor and his insanely hot youth pastor son. You had to have him. You needed him like no other. “Lord forgive me for what I do later.” Fixing your dress as you got up, smiling at all the families that passed by you.
You were never the religious kind, you never participated in church, hell you rarely even came to service. But as soon as you caught a look of Mingi you were already in your closet picking out an outfit. You’d always try your best to match him. His outfits were very simple and appropriate but also so slutty somehow. It could be all his rings and chains but once you start thinking about it your mind wonders, thinking about how his chains would look dangling in your face. You shook those thoughts out of your head, saying bye to the last few families to leave.
Upon Mingis arrival to your town you were quick to sign up as an assistant. You didn't care about them damn kids nor the lord but here you were every sunday, helping by his side teaching about the lord.
“Thank you so much for your help today. I know it was a lot harder since we had a full house.” Mingi spoke, making you jump a bit. That’s the other thing about him that had you so enamored..His voice. It was so deep and husky but so soothing. You could listen to him for hours.
“It's no problem Mingi, you did great like always. I’m just happy we let out early today.” You moved out of the pew to now stand face to face with him. “I get to hang out with my favorite person.”
Mingi looked at you with confusion and sight shock, pointing at himself. “M-me?”
Despite his “cold” and “dark” image Mingi was a very gentle and even cute person. Any and everyone could see that. “Yes, you. Why do you think I help you out so much? Why I’m always by your side? Why I’m always at your beck and call?” You watched as his cheeks turned a soft shade of pink. Cute. Walking closer to him he seemed frozen, closing his eyes briefly as if waiting for something eagerly.
“You’re so cute like this…flustered and pretty.” Walking closer you stopped right in front of him, leaning up to his ear with a smirk. “If only the heavens knew how beautiful you look right now.”
“y/n I…w-what's going o-on…” You placed a quick kiss on his cheek, watching as his eyes popped open. He looked as if he saw a ghost but the tint of pink never left his face.
“Ever since you knocked on our door holding that gift basket, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. You looked so fucking good Mingi. I wanted you, I needed you. So I signed up to help, anything to be closer to you. Not only did my urges to have you get stronger, I started to grow feelings for you.”
Mingi couldn’t believe what he was hearing. This is everything he ever dreamed of. Yeah, he was the pastor's son and had to keep up an innocent persona;but it was quite the opposite. As much as he was devoted to his faith he could never shake the thought of you ever since he saw you. He wanted to hold you, take in your scent…devour you. Mingi knew it would be wrong and go against his faith, but he couldn’t help but imagine such sinister acts with you.
“You’re very bad at hiding your gaze, Min. I see you stare and used to think nothing of it. 'oh, he's not looking at me, he's just giving his attention like usual…’ until I bent down and saw you staring at my chest.” You took a step back and watched his reaction with a smirk. His hands were balled up, his face still a visible pink, and a much more visible print in his pants appeared. You could tell from the way he stood there he was virgin but not in the slightest innocent.
“I- I tried to hide it…”
“Not well enough.”
Mingi bit his lip before starting to mumble.
“Wouldn’t you like to feel like a king for a day or even forever? I think you liked it.” You spoke with a small laugh moving to sit Mingi in the pew. He sat there and watched your every move, waiting for you to pounce on him.
“Y/n please… I can’t get the thought of you out of my head. I ache for you.” These words sounded like music to your ears. Mingi wanted you, ached for you, needed you. Moving into the pew you sat on his lap, feeling how big he was instantly and watching him let out a soft whimper.
“You might want to get an early start on your hail marys then.” You placed small and slow kisses on his neck, moving up to his jaw, sucking lightly. He sounded so fucking needy, and you to wanted to hear him scream in pleasure but decided to spare him.
“H-hail Mary, full of grace…The L-lord is with thee fuck y/n-“
“Don’t stop, keep going.” You began to bite at his skin, leaving small marks that would disappear pretty quickly. “Blessed art t-thou amongst wo- ahh…women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.” Mingi finally allowed his hands to rest at your waist, gripping tightly with each bite. “Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us s-sinners, now and at the hour of our death, Amen.”
“Amen indeed, I can’t believe I have you all to myself Min. You sound so pretty under me. You’re already so hard for me, I think I should do something about that huh?” You laughed a little as Mingi began to nod very quickly, begging to feel something more. Moving off his lap you found a way to kneel in front of him. It was a little uncomfortable but such a small price to pay for what was in store. Mingi took a second to look at you, taking in how pretty you looked in front of him. He mindlessly reached for your cheek and smiled, knowing there was no going back once you started and he was okay with that.
You wasted no time and began to unbuckle his belt and undo his pants, biting your lip as you could see his print more and more. Lifting his hips Mingi helped you pull his boxers and pants down to his mid thigh, giving you more than enough access. Mingi was big. Bigger than most you’ve been with, you were determined to take all you were given. “Please…do something…” Looking up at him doe eyed you licked a stripe up his shaft, smiling as you finally got a taste of him.
Licking up his precum you took as much of him as you could, moaning and slightly gagging at how full your mouth was. Mingis hand quickly moved to hold onto one of the ponytails, bucking his hips at the sudden warmth. Your mouth felt amazing, he was sure he'd cum in no time if you kept it up.. “Your mouth feels better than I imagined fuck..” Mingi moaned, throwing his head back trying his best to keep as quiet as possible. The worst part is if someone walked in right now, he would care less. All his prayers were being answered right before him.
Tears ran down the side of you face as you let Mingi fuck your throat. He was a lot more rough than you imagined but damn did it turn you on. You let your hands travel between your legs, slipping into your underwear and inserting two fingers to fill yourself up more. Feeling so stretched out you let out a moan sending vibrations up Mingis cock. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum. Lord, please, please please forgive me.” Hearing him beg for forgiveness turned you on so much, inching close to your own release.
You sped up your pace, fingering yourself fast and sucking off Mingi even faster. Every cell in Mingis body felt like it was on fire; He's never felt this kind of pleasure before and hopes that this will never be the last. Mingi grabbed onto both your pigtails, practically hunched over your body. If anyone had walked in right this moment they would just think he was praying. “yn i-im cumming! im cumming oh—oh my god…thank you, thank y-you.”
Cumming down your throat felt amazing to Mingi. From your face stained with tears, spit, and cum; your legs sore and shaking from cumming so hard. You both stayed like that for a second, Mingi finally sitting back breathing heavily. You lifted off his cock, making sure you swallowed everything and taking a deep breath.
“You have a thing for being rough, it's hot. You should also be thanking me, I just gave you the best blowjob ever.” You smiled, moving to place the two fingers you used to fuck your self in Mingis mouth. “A small taste of what's to come. Literally.”
You laughed and used his legs to help you get up, sitting right next to him in the pew. “Y-you want to do this again?” Mingi asked, shocked since he has yet to catch his breath properly.
“I told you I can make you feel like a king for a day, or forever. I think we both want forever…unless I'm wrong?” You searched to see where your bag was, reaching into the pew behind you and pulling it into your lap and searching for wipes to clean you both up.
“No! I mean, you're not wrong…I would really like that,I just feel like I'm still dreaming…” Taking the wipe he was handed, he cleaned up any excess spit and around his thighs before pulling up his boxers and pants.
“Dream or not, I’m all yours Mingi. I’m heavily devoted to you.” He looked at you with so much awe and lust, wiping your stray tears and smiling softly.
“I’m more than willing to sin for you, dream and reality.” And he meant that, no amount of repentance will make up for it and he was okay with that.
“You should come over this weekend, My parents are gonna be out of town. We can see how devoted we are to each other, like the lord wants.” You spoke soft, moving to whisper into his ear before pulling back and giving him a quick peck. “See you soon Mingi, or should I say pastor Song.”
Mingi watched as you picked up your bag and waved bye with such a sinister grin, you truly were a wolf in sheep’s clothing. He sat there and thought back on everything he just experienced, chuckling at how lucky he just got.His prayers were definitely answered. Thanks God. He shook his head and moved to kneel down, folding his hands and bowing his head. Might as well get an early start right? “Hail Mary, forgive me, blood for blood, hearts beating…”
©️slyblonder
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a/n :I FINALLY DROPPED THIS FIC OMG!! Sorry i took so long yall, life started turning me every way but loose and then also starting a new job drained me. But enjoy I hope yall like it, if not also lmk you hate it🗿 okay byee love youu
tags:
@slvtiny @pandoora-the-pink-goth @pearltinyy
#ateez#mingi x reader#mingi smut#song mingi#mingi#ateez mingi#mingi fluff#mingi scenarios#mingi fanfic#song mingi smut#ateez drabbles#ateez fanfic#ateez smut#ateez imagines#ateez fic#ateez x reader#ateez scenarios#slyblonder
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i’ve seen discourse abt ellie being stone top or a switch and i’m curious to know how do u hc her? she’s so hot either way idk how to feel😵💫
top to bottom [ellie williams]
pairing; ellie x f!reader
an; thanks for this request!! i've never written headcanons before hehe **♡( ⁎ᵕᴗᵕ⁎ )
18+ only, mdni!!!
so i know a lot of people actually hc ellie as being a bottom, but i really think she's a switch, though definitely preferring to top.
she'd be fucking whipped for you, eager to please you in any way you want, making her perfect to top you—she's the type to anticipate all your needs, and she'd do anything to make sure they're met.
"i know you've had a stressful week baby, let me make it better. please? i'll make it all better, i promise..."
she's just so casually dominant. she has a filthy mouth in casual conversation, and an even filthier one when she has you in her bed or on the table or in the bathroom or behind the church. she always knows exactly what to say to push your buttons, to rile you up, to get you right where she wants you...she'll have you practically kissing her feet, begging to be fucked.
"i know, sweetheart, you've been so good today...so polite, doing everything i asked of you...why don't you lay down for me?"
i think she'd like fucking you any way she could, but fucking you with the strap has to be her favorite. the way your face twists up in pleasure as she pushes past that tight ring of muscle, starting slowly until you're begging for more—and of course, she'll give it to you.
"oh fuck yeah...c'mon babe, arch that back, lemme in...you feel that, huh? nice and deep, just how you like it?"
she's a fucking sex god. have you seen her fucking fingers? i just know that seeing the pleasure she brings you gets her off—the pretty sounds you make while she's stuffing you full, feeling your pussy clench around her fingers as she draws orgasm after orgasm out of you...i just know she could come untouched.
"ah ah, don't cover your mouth, princess, lemme hear those pretty noises you make...yeah, good girl, that's it..."
she's a fucking munch. PERIODT. END OF SENTENCE.
"always so fucking wet for me...lemme taste you, fuck, i gotta taste you..."
buuuuut, she's also a big softie. she'll do anything to make you smile, and doesn't always take sex so seriously. she laughs at herself sometimes, or takes the worst possible moment to make a joke like when she's about to make you cum on her face.
"sorry babe, i couldn't help myself!"
you always know she wants you to top when she asks you to "watch a movie." it's her perfect excuse to cuddle up in your arms while you rub her back, feeling her breaths get heavier and deeper the further your hand trails down, until the night ends with the movie long forgotten, and her coming all over your fingers.
"it's been a long day, babe. let's cuddle and watch a movie?"
she's a fucking whimperer when she's getting fucked, i just know it. she's a little bossy, tells you exactly how many fingers to use, tells you how to grind your hips while you're scissoring, but you'll always do it, because it draws the sweetest sounds out of her pretty pink lips.
"right there, right there...uh, uh, fuck..."
she just wants to be close to you all the time. days off together are the best—laying in bed all day, in between naps kissing sloppily and lazily grinding your hips together, taking turns coaxing gentle orgasms out of each other...there's nothing like it.
"i love you...so much...my everything...."
#ellie williams#ellie williams smut#ellie williams x reader#ellie x reader#ellie williams x you#ellie x you#ellie tlou#ellie williams tlou pt 2#tlou pt 2#the last of us smut
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Hole in One | Taeyong x Fem! Reader
a/n: 🤭 my first little one shot yay!! i hope y’all like it hehe.
notes: taeyong is bored and rich, reader is a cart girl at a country club, fluffy and smutty, overuse of the word hole lol
warnings: smut..thats abt it !
word count: 2.6k
Enjoy!! Tysm 🩷
———
“You really need to stop staring at her. It’s weird.”
Johnny’s voice breaks Taeyong out of his trance.
“I’m not staring.” He grumbles. “I’m trying to think of what I want.”
“Is he staring at the beverage cart girl again?” Mark asks, standing up straight again, holding his golf club like a baseball bat over his shoulder.
Taeyong doesn’t know why he goes with the two to play the absolute most boring game he’s ever heard of. Golf was terrible. They had to wake up at ass o’clock and dress like they were going to church to get drunk on hot beer. All the while trying to hit the tiniest balls into holes a mile away and stand in the sun for 6 hours. He had no idea why he agreed to go with Johnny and Mark to a country club in the first place. It just wasn’t his style.
Then along came the little golf cart with drinks and snacks driven by you, the beautiful beverage cart girl. Two months and a ridiculous amount of club fees and a set of clubs he didn’t even know how to use later, here he still was.
“If you wanna talk to her so bad stop making me go buy shit from her dude.” Mark says as they get into the cart to go to the next hole. Taeyong sighs, pulling at the itchy white collared shirt he bought specifically to come here.
“It’s not that simple she’s probably just gonna think I’m like these old dudes who play here to creep on her.” Taeyong says. Mark and Johnny share a look. “For starters” Johnny begins. “You don’t look like you have one foot in the grave. She’s probably happy to see us here since we are most likely the youngest members of this stuffy club.” Taeyong shrugs. “Okay what’s your next point?”.
“Second of all, whenever she sees Mark walking up to the cart she immediately scans the field for you and whenever you aren’t paying attention she’s staring just as hard as you do.” Johnny smirks as Taeyong feels his face get hot. You stare too?!?! God that’s hot. Or weird? Embarrassing? Taeyong doesn’t know.
As the boys park the cart near the next hole, Taeyong hears the sound of another cart pulling up behind them. Before he turns around he hears Mark shout “Hey Y/N!”
Taeyong feels his blood run cold.
“Hi Markie! Hi Johnny!” You shout back, waving excitedly from the front seat of your cart. Taeyong wants to die from how pretty your voice is. “I came up here to see if you guys needed to get anything? It’s hot today!”
Taeyong can’t help but stare, still sitting in the golf cart. You just look so cute in your uniform. Perfectly white cap with a tank top and tennis skirt to match. God he feels nauseous.
“Yeah Taeyong wanted something I think.” Johnny says, throwing an evil smile at Taeyong who is plotting on how he can blow up his head with the power of his mind. “Y-yeah right.” He says quickly as he gets out of the cart and walks over towards you.
“Oh so you’re Taeyong! I see you with the boys all the time but I’ve never got to talk to you.” You smile as he stands in front of your cart. “I’m Y/N.”
Taeyong feels sweatier. You can’t be real.
“What did you want hon?” You ask him sweetly, and he feels like he’s melting into a puddle. “I’ve got some chips and sandwiches and I have some chocolate in the ice chest in case you want something sweet? Theres plenty of beer and water too!”
Taeyong stares blankly, too nervous to even breathe and then says shortly “Beer. Please.”
Yep, he’s already fucked up. With any luck his mind magic worked and Johnny will burst into flames at any moment now.
You smile and nod as you turn around to grab the beer from an ice chest. Taeyong tries to be a gentleman but can’t resist sparing a glance at your ass in the pristine white skirt. Nice.
“That’s gonna be $6.” You smile, handing him the drink. Taeyong realizes he didn’t even tell you what brand he wanted at that moment and looks to see you already knew his favorite. He finally manages to smile as he hands you the cash, only to walk away awkwardly to sit in the cart again.
“Okay you boys be careful! I’m gonna circle back around later to make sure you guys have plenty of water!” You wave to Mark and Johnny and beam at Taeyong again. Taeyong’s chest hurts. You are just too sweet.
Taeyong waits to hear the turn of your cart engine, but it never arrives. He turns to see you groan.
“Damn it’s dead.” He hears you grumble.
“Everything okay?” Mark asks you, and you sigh. “No my stupid cart died. I knew it was on it’s last leg but..” You trailed off. “God now I have to lug all this crap back to the clubhouse.”
“We can help you take your stuff back!” Johnny suggests. Taeyong takes back every bad thought he had against him.
“Oh are you sure? It’s kinda far and I don’t wanna interrupt your game!” You reply. Johnny shakes his head “No it’s alright, it’s too hot today anyway we we’re thinking about leaving early anyway.”
In that moment Taeyong knew there was a God and his name was Johnny Suh.
—
Once everyone had all arrived at the clubhouse, Taeyong helped you bring the ice chests inside.
“Are you usually this quiet?” You ask suddenly “I don’t mean to ask in a rude way but after seeing how loud Johnny and Mark are it’s surprising to see how reserved you are.”
Taeyong feels his face get hot again. “Oh um….Not really. Just when I’m tired. It was pretty hot out there.” He chuckles, trying to seem light.
“Ah that makes sense.” You reply. You both leave the ice chests in the main office of the club house just as Taeyong’s phone begins to ring. You signal to him that you’ll be right back as he picks up the call.
“Hello?”
“Take Y/N home.” Johnny whispers. “This is your chance man. You take her home or to your place or whatever in your car me and Mark will just catch a cab.”
“Have you lost your damn mind?” Taeyong whisper yells “She’ll definitely think I’m a creep!”
“She’s always complaining about using a cab to go home, if she brings it up just offer! Worst thing she’s gonna say is no!”
Taeyong sighs as the call ends. Time to be a man he thinks. Johnny is right the worst thing you can say is no.
He turns around to ask you if you needed a ride and finds you standing there in a regular shirt and shorts. Somehow it makes all the more attractive to him.
“Oh um. Johnny had mentioned you complain about taking the cab alot so..” Taeyong begins. Come on be a man! A man!! He thinks. “I wanted to ask if you wanted to go get dinner or something and then I can take you home if you want?”
You stare at him briefly. You think to yourself it might be weird to accept and offer from a stranger, but you also know he’s super handsome and you’d be dumb not to.
“I’d love to!”
—
Things continued to go well for both you and Taeyong. You had suggested he pick something up to go after you discovered he lived in such a nice apartment and you wanted to see if he really got away with drawing on the wall. Hearing this made Taeyong almost drive off a bridge, but he obliged.
As Taeyong drove up to his apartment complex, the only thing running through his mind was you. Your laugh your smile your voice. You were so perfect in his eyes.
And now you were going to be in his apartment. He was going to have to think of some way to repay Johnny and Mark one day.
“Wow! This place is great.” You said as you both walked inside. Taeyong smiled at your enthusiasm, setting the food down on the kitchen counter.
“Where’s you bedroom?” You asked, turning to face him. “I wanna see your drawings.”
Taeyong nodded and led you down the hall of his apartment and unlocked his bedroom door to let you in. Immediately you were greeted with neon lights and drawings that littered the wallspace.
“Wow…I really thought you were joking!” You giggled. Sitting on his bed, you admired more of the drawings on the wall.
Taeyong was suddenly aware he was still wearing his stuffy golf clothes. He started to change before he caught you staring at him shirtless. Cracking a smile at you he said “Can I help you?”
You quickly blushed and looked back toward the wall, embarrassed. “Oh I’m sorry for staring..”
Taeyong felt a wave of confidence overtake him as he walked to kneel in front of you, trying to make direct eye contact. “Honestly…it’s okay. I stare too.”
You faced him now, confused. “What do you mean?” Taeyong smiled softly at your expression. “I mean the only reason I even go to that stupid country club is to stare at you in your pretty little uniform all day.”
You stare into his big dark eyes waiting for some sort of change, but it doesn’t come. He’s serious now. You feel your face get even hotter.
Fuck it Taeyong thinks, and leans forward to kiss you softly, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you forward. You gasp at first, and then melt into him. He deepens the kiss and you moan softly, bringing your hands up to his dark hair.
Before he gets carried away, Taeyong pulls back. “I-is this okay?” He whispers softly, kissing down your neck to make you shiver in his grasp.
“Yes yes.” You whisper back. “I know it’s quick but I know I’ve wanted you ever since you started coming to the club.”
Taeyong feels lightheaded, and laughs as he pushes you down on his bed. “That’s good to hear.” He says, laying on top of you to continue kissing you harder.
Taeyong pulls away again to lift up your shirt and bra, revealing your bare chest. You feel yourself grow shy, but before you even have a second to process your thoughts you feel his mouth on your nipple.
“Fuck” You moan. Taeyong pulls away again and kisses the nape of your neck. “Everyday.” He whispers. “Every single day I was at that stuffy old club all I could think about was your cute little face and how badly I wanted to just flip up your tennis skirt and play with your pussy.” His words make your face feel impossibly hotter and you feel your panties start to stick to your gushing core.
“Taeyong…” You moan again, this time moving your hand down his warm chest and stomach to feel his hard bulge. “Please fuck me.”
“I will baby don’t worry.” Taeyong replies. “I’m just so happy you feel the same way.” He finally stops his ministrations on your neck to sit up and move your hair out of your face to get a better look at you.
“So pretty..” He muses, making you blush even more. Finally, he pulls down your shorts and admires the wet spot on your panties.
“Aw honey I barely even touched you..You’re so cute.” Taeyong says slowly rubbing your clit through your panties making you moan louder. “Hurry up please.” You whine to him.
“I know honey.” He whispers, pulling your panties off making you shiver as the air makes contact with your wetness. Taeyong slowly pushes a finger into your hole, making you whine at how easily he slips in. “Fucking hell.” He curses, amazed at how turned on you are. (And how turned on it makes him.)
“Taeyongie please give me more.” You moan out. Taeyong pushes in another finger quickly scissoring you open after hearing his new nickname. “You are so impossibly cute baby.” He whispers again.
Finally after deeming you ready he pulls off his shorts and underwear in one go. Your eyes widen at the size of his hard cock.
“Baby do you wanna turn around for me? Just for a minute?” Taeyong asks you softly. “I wanna see your pretty ass bounce on my cock first.” His words make you hotter, and without even thinking you’re laying on your stomach with your head in one of his pillows.
Taeyong slowly caresses your back and the moves his hands to grip your ass softly. “So fucking pretty.” He mumbles, lining up his cock with your hole finally.
You both moan when he sinks into you perfectly. Not even sparing a second he starts thrusting slowly, making you moan louder and louder.
“Fuck your so fucking tight around me honey. It’s crazy.” Taeyong babbles, obsessed with the way your ass bounces against him. You can only muster up a half groan in response to him. “Aww has my pretty girl gotten herself cock drunk already?” Taeyong teases you, going faster and harder, making you scream out. “That’s it baby let it out.” He says.
After a few minutes, you feel yourself getting closer to your peak. Suddenly Taeyong pulls out of you, almost making you sob in response.
“I have to see your pretty face when you come baby flip over for me.” Taeyong says, rubbing the small of your back before you quickly move onto your back. He leans down again to kiss at your neck and face before grabbing your cheek kiss you roughly, making you whimper.
Taeyong leans back to line himself up again and slowly pushes in, watching your expression change and once he’s bottomed out he starts of hard and fast, moaning in unison with you. For a moment you think about the shy person he was just a few hours ago, and this change makes you all the more wetter.
You feel yourself reaching your peak quickly, barely making out the words. “Taeyongie…m’gonna come.”
Taeyong leans forward to rest his fore against yours to ask “Where do you want me to cum honey?” The question pushes you further to the edge as you say “Inside.”
This makes Taeyong nearly burst at the thought of it. Soon enough, you feel him getting sloppy as he whispers in your ear “Cum with me baby I know you can my pretty girl.”
Moaning loudly you feel yourself squirt around his thick cock right as he finally explodes inside you, riding out both your orgasms before quickly flopping in the bed next you. He rolls over again to lay his head on your chest as you fight to control your breathing.
“God damn.” You finally say. Taeyong just laughs as he lays on your chest, snaking his arms around your torso to pull you even closer to him.
“Hey I just realized” He says “Our food is probably super cold by now.” You both look at each other for a moment before bursting into another fit of laughter.
As he watches you get up slowly to put the takeout in the microwave and begin a movie marathon Taeyong thinks maybe golf isn’t so bad after all.
#drxmxss writes#nct 127#nct smut#nct fluff#nct fanfic#nct taeyong#taeyong x reader#nct hard hours#nct hard thoughts#taeyong smut#nct imagines#nct#nct x reader#nct scenarios
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Feelings
Media The Queens Gambit
Character Benny Watts
Couple Benny X Reader
Rating Sweet + SMut
Requested:
Hey fiction witch, if u can see this I have a request, in the show Beth leaves New York and goes back to her house and when Beth and Benny r on the phone Benny gets upset and tells Beth to not call him, after that happens can u plz make y/n find out that Beth hurt Benny and y/n being her sweet and empathetic self, goes to comfort Benny in his house and yk wtv happens next 🤭 if u can make that story asap that would be amazing thank u 🙏
I shifted my hips from side to side humming along with the tune coming from my record player speaker, My hands in the hot water washing up the dishes and pots from dinner. I jumped as I heard my phone begin its blaring. So I left the last pot to soak trying off my hands on my apron as I scampered my shoes across the floor of my little townhouse I quickly turned down the volume on my record player as I passed the shelf, I lost my footing a little on the rug's stupid curled corner and went tumbling onto my sofa on my back, luckily just beside my phone table so I picked up the red rotary phone from the table bringing it to my ear.
"Y/l/n Residence." I smiled
"Hi y/n" Beth smiled
"Ohh, My my to what do I owe the pleasure, Miss Harmon?"
"Oh you know, nothing unusual. How's queens?"
"Boring. But finally unpacked my last few boxes so shaping up nicely. How's kentuky?"
"Much the same" she smiled "So, I had a question."
"ahh there is the point of your call, of course, ask away"
"You've been to Moscow correct?"
"Yes, I have. I assume there is a follow-up question."
"Yeah, I'm doing a bit of packing. I know everyone says Moscow is cold but... exactly how cold?"
"When they say cold they mean cold beth. It's freezing in Moscow. The snow came up to my knees. I was so cold I ripped stuffing out of the hotel pillow to shove in my bra because I was convinced my nipples would freeze off. and that's coming from a New York girl" I laughed "Pack for ice. Pack for snow. Pack for seeing your breath inside buildings."
"Really?"
"If you're too hot you can always take layers off," I explained
"Fair enough,"
"That all?"
"I had something else to ask too"
"Sure, fire away."
"Did you... Like to fuck Benny?"
"That's a bold question for six pm"
"But did you, when you two were... together?"
I laughed "My darling Elizabeth. Me and Benny never have been... together. Not officially anyway."
"But when you did. Did you like to?"
"Sometimes."
"Sometimes?"
"You can say every time you've had sex you liked it? sometimes stuff's just shit"
"But other than those times"
"I did. Course I did. Benny... is a complicated man"
"How so?"
"Because he's Benny" I laugh "He's weird, he thinks fifteen steps ahead at any one moment, he's passionate and dedicated with an ego big enough to fly himself to Moscow and back, but he's also... you know a man. so he's blunt and simple, and can't see a hint five inches in front of his face." I explained, "Why?"
"I think. it might be over."
"Over? Did it ever begin?"
"I mean... kinda. sort of. It's complicated."
"Beth. What happened?"
"So you know how Benny's been bugging me to come to New York"
"Yes. Because he misses you. That's his way of saying that."
"Yeah he even told me"
"He told you he missed you?"
"Yes"
"And you did what?"
"Nothing."
"Nothing!"
"Yeah I mean we called a little more but not much else. and I kinda... pissed him off"
"What did you do?"
"I gave the church the money back. I tried to ask him for money. if he wants to come he can help me pay for it right? he flipped out and told me not to call him again. That was... two days ago and he won't answer the phone. Guess I'm just kinda..."
"You're serious?" I sighed
"Yeah."
"Okay... I have not got time to deal with you" I sighed sitting up normally "All I'm gonna say is you've fucked up Beth. And I am going to clean this up, not because I want to help you. But because I care too much about Benny. I will call you later and we will have a chat" I told her before hanging up the phone
"Fuck..." I sighed "Harmon, you do make my life difficult" I grabbed the phone again and dialled the number for the Brooklyn basement listening to it ring but no answer, I tried again but still no answer, I gave it one more try but still no answer.
I gave up setting the phone back on the receiver and I got to my feet untieing my apron throwing it on the kitchen table grabbing my handbag making sure to grab my spare key. changing my shoes and slipping on my gloves before rushing out locking up my front door as I scampered down the steps of the stoop I unlocked the door on my little red mini threw my bag on the passenger seat quickly started the car up and scampered through the New York streets using all the little cut thoughts I knew to travel the six miles from my townhouse in queens to the basement in Brooklyn. I pulled my mini up behind the little blue Beatle parked and grabbed my bag climbing out of the car and heading down the little foul-smelling stairwells until I finally reached the metal door giving it a firm few taps. No answer came. but I could hear noises from within. I knocked much louder but still no answer came.
I rolled my eyes grabbed the spare key from my handbag forced it into the lock and opened the door shutting it behind me immediately I could tell things weren't good.
This apartment was dark, gloomy and damp as usual, bottles littered his table enough you could use them as pieces in a chess game, and things haphazardly moved around the apartment. And Benny amongst it all. Barefoot. Black jeans tight to his body, his belt gone, his black turtleneck on with his sleeves rolled up, frustration across his face, a beer in hand that he finished and there across his apartment smashing it on the wall.
“Benny?”
He ran a hand through his hair and glanced up at me “Hey y/n.”
“How are you feeling?”
“I'm fine” he snapped grabbing a cigarette from his table setting it in his mouth and lighting it up with his old Zippo
“Benny.” I glared
“I'm fine.” He snapped
“Beth called me.”
“Did she now? You come down to tell me I'm an asshole”
“I don't make judgements till I hear both sides” I answered “So, tell me what happened.”
“So it fucking -”
“Calmly.”
“It's over. I'm done with her. I have put up with so much shit from her. She treats me like a doormat, and only calls me when she needs something. Well she can go fuck herself” he says pacing around his apartment
“Okay, what exactly happened?”
“She gave the money back. Asked me to pay for us. She ignored everything I told her. All because she didn't want to sign some worthless bit of paper. Now I can't go to Moscow with her. Fine, she clearly didn't want me with her anyway.”
“Alright, and you told her?”
“I told her not to call me again. She wants to do this on her own fine. She can. She won't hear a word from me, but she can fuck off if she wants anything.”
“You've been ignoring calls?”
“I didn't exactly feel like talking right now”
“Alright, go get changed and I'll make you some tea”
“I don't -”
“Benny. Don't make me bonk you with a spoon”
“Fine I will get changed” he sighed going to his room “and make coffee.”
“No tea. Coffee will keep you up and you do not need more energy right now” I explained going and making some nice tea one for me and one for Benny taking and sitting them both on the small table in the centre of the living space, as well as a glass of water I took a small dustpan and brush from the cabinet and cleaned up the broken glass from the bottle as well as any other little mess that littered the apartment. I went to the small record player beside the chair and for a moment flipped through his small collection grabbing a nice album of some gentle swing music adding it to the player letting it spin and turning it down to almost nothing, and I took a seat on the pile of pillows he used as a sofa. Soon enough he returned with a fresh set of clothes, some new jeans, a black T-shirt and his green button-down
“There you feel a little better now?”
“It is nice to have some fresh clothes on” he grunted back
“Come on” I offered patting the pillow beside me
“I'm not in the mood y/n”
“Benny. Come here.”
He rolled his eyes but came and sat beside me still as angry and frustrated as before leaning his head against the exposed bricks
“Good, now when did you last drink something?”
“I'm not thirsty”
“Did I ask that?”
“No”
“When did you last drink something? You're only going to give yourself a headache” I told him, offering him the water but he turned away “Hydrate. Or I will hit you with a spoon”
He took the glass and had a sizable sip
“Thank you, now come here and talk it out”
“Y/n I know you mean well but I’m-”
“I will get the spoon in a minute.” I warn “Come” I demanded patting my thigh
He rolled his eyes but leant over so I wrapped my arms around him letting him lay his head in my lap “I don't see how this is going to help”
“You need to acknowledge and work through your feelings”
“I don't have feelings. I'm a man.”
“Ohh no you don't have feelings. That's why you've been spending your days in a dark basement drinking like a fish and frustrated smoking. No feelings at all” I smiled gently petting his soft fluffy hair
“I don't need to work through my feelings.”
“Yes, you do. Otherwise, you're just going to be angry forever. And god knows I can't deal with that” I laughed
“Fine” he sighed
“Take a moment just to clear the brain” I smiled playing with his hair in all the usual spots he liked me too
“My brain doesn’t clear.”
“Then hyperfocus. On the ticking of the clock, the nice gentle music, clear the mind of all other things and just exist for a moment”
We sat for a few moments just enjoying the quiet of his basement, the gentle hum of the music and the rhythm of our breaths
“Okay” He nods sounding far calmer than before
“That help?”
“A little”
“Okay do a Big breath in.”
“Why do I-”
“Benny” I warned so he did as I asked “Big breath in. And back out. Another one in… and another out. Okay? Feel a little better?” I smiled walking him through it a few times
“A bit”
“Are you calmer?”
“Somewhat”
“So, tell me what happened”
“You going to tell me when I’m wrong?”
“No. I'm not going to say anything you just explain and I will listen.”
“I try asking her for months to come up to New York, actually spend some time together, no she's busy she needs to do this, she needs to do that, she ghosts me for six months, okay I try asking to go to Paris with her support her with the tournament, no she's going on her own, she can't afford to take me too, so fine she goes on her own only when she's fucked herself up so bad she looses her tournament and has headlines everywhere she was drunk as a sailor then! I got a call. I try to be supportive and offer to pick her up from the airport. No, she wants to be alone. I try to talk her through everything and offer her a safe space, so we can be together and work stuff out, no she wants to be alone. She wants to drink. Fine, I try! I try and say she can drink so long as she came here no she wants to go and get drunk. She goes home to Kentucky and ghosts me again. She calls me finally because she wants my advice and again I try to get her to come here, I try and be nice hell I told her I fucking missed her nope she wants to stay on her own meaning she wants to fucking drink. And again I'm ghosted. She completely ignores what I tell her to do. She gives the church their money and calls me up like I'm the problem! Like I haven't spent the last year waiting for your phone calls like some abandoned puppy! Says she's paying her own way to Moscow and can't afford to take me with her, if I wanna come I need to pay, when she knows full well I don't have two thousand dollars laying around to jet off to Moscow. Accused me of gambling it all away. So fuck it. Fuck her. She wants to go and her drunk and fuck her life up that's her decision she's not taking me down with her. I'm not staying as her fucking doormat fuck to treat her how she wants. If she'd rather get drunk than be with me fine I hope she and her bottle are happy”
“How did that make you feel?”
“Like shit.”
“Benny, feelings are not shit. use your words. Not just your swears.”
“Like… why should I bother you know? Like I'm trying so so much and you're giving absolutely nothing back. And that makes me feel like I'm the asshole for wanting anything”
“You're not an asshole for wanting acknowledgement Benny. You've done a lot for Beth and it's not easy for you to be emotionally numerable”
“Exactly! It's like you bare your fucking soul to someone and their response is okay cool. What else? Like I don't know what more you want from me. Am I being a dick? Asking for too much or something?”
“I don't think so, I do think you also need to respect Beth is also not an emotional person. The two of you aren't going to have a great emotional conversation because neither of you are good emotional communicators and that's fine some people aren't, but it would seem you are putting a lot of effort in, now Beth may not see it as a lot of effort in her mind and may not be seeing how much effort that Is for you and not appreciate it as much or it could be that she just expects more. and if you can't give her that then you can't there's nothing wrong with that Benny”
“Do you think I'm an emotionally distant person?”
“You can be. You're… very practical Benny. You're emotional to the extent of practically, when emotions aren't useful you don't bother to express them. But I do think you not in the wrong here you've made a lot of moves to be more outwardly expressive and it was clear you were upset long before this” I explained “I think, and of course, you don't need to take my advice. But I think you and Beth need time apart I think you both need to not see one another, not speak to one another, for a couple of weeks I think you both need to separately decide the kind of relationship you want together. If you want to have the kind of relationship where you call every other day and talk or if you want a relationship where you talk every six months how much emotional investment you each have needs to be equal and it clearly isn't so I think spend time apart to think and when she gets back from Moscow you two need to talk and see where you go from here.”
“... Your right.” He sighed sitting up “Where did you learn all this stuff anyway?” He asks having some tea
“Therapy. You know that thing I keep telling you to go to”
“I don't need therapy”
“Everyone needs therapy, Benny.”
“I don’t”
“Yes, you do.” I told him “You have a lot of untapped emotional issues rattling around in that big head of yours” I told him having some tea “And I’m boarder line convinced you have… some type of-”
“No I don’t” he snapped
“Benny you hyperfocus on chess, don’t understand your own emotions, freak out when someone tries to touch your skin, and use your rings like fidget toys… and you don’t think there might be a possibility you could have some form of -”
“No.”
“Fine, fine. I’m not going to argue with you” I giggled “You should go to therapy though Benny.”
“Ohh what because I have ‘emotional trauma’?”
“Yes. you do.” I told him “Even if it's just having someone to talk to, to rant about your problems”
“That's why I have you”
“I'm not your therapist Benny”
“Sorry”
“It's fine” I smiled pressing a kiss to the top of his head “You really liked her didn't you?”
“I did. I kinda thought we were the same. Maybe we're too much alike”
“Do you think maybe… you're seeing the bad things in Beth that you see in yourself?”
“Kinda. I think it's … made me realize how bad it is to be on that side of it. To be the one waiting by the phone on the promise of a call that never comes. I think I'm .. trying though. I can see how bad it is and in trying to fix it but just feels like bailing a bucket out a lake”
“Well, baby steps. Just the fact you see it and are making steps is still better. You're never going to bail the lake if you don't start with a bucket”
“I guess so. It makes me wonder… how she sees me. I know officially we didn't label anything but, I kinda think she just saw me as a chessboard that could make her cum”
“What did you want her to be?”
“....I don't know. Guess I wanted someone to call. Someone to spend time with. Someone who wants to talk to me. Listens to me. Makes me feel like what I say makes a difference. Like I Matter to them. Someone who gets excited about spending time with me, who wants to be with me not because we might play chess or we might have sex but just because we like being together”
“You ever tell her that?”
“No.”
“Then … you can't expect her to give you that Benny. She's not a mind reader. She doesn't know that's what you want same as you don't know what she wants. You two are both people not great at emotions be the best course is to straight forward sit her down and say that's what you want and if that's not what she wants you can either try to find a middle ground or that can be it”
“Your right. But I don't want to see her. Or talk to her. I don't completely want to think about her but there's no getting out of that” he explained lighting another cigarette “But I'm done. Unless she's willing to try I don't want anything more than to be her friend”
“If that's what you want. That's what you want” I smiled taking the cigarette from him putting it out in the table’s ashtray “You’re not smoking because you want it you smoking because your frustrated.” I laughed
“Your therapist tell you that too?”
“No. I just know you, Benny. Besides you’ve been doing really good. Don’t destroy all your progress just because you’re mad” I told him
“You rather I drink?”
“I’d rather you have healthy coping mechanisms but you know… baby steps.” I smiled “You feel a bit better? Got all that off your chest?”
“Yeah. Thanks y/n.”
“Your welcome” I smirked having some tea “It's kinda funny”
“What is?”
“That's exactly what I wanted. Back when we …”
“Really?” He asks
“Yeah. I'd have killed for you to want to spend time with me without it seeming like I was dragging you away from something you wanted to do more”
“.... Fuck. I was a dick.”
“You kinda were.” I laughed “But we wanted different things that's okay”
“I feel like shit. Maybe things would be different if I figured out this is what I wanted”
“Maybe” I shrug “But you didn’t want that then that’s fine you can change your mind as life changes, that wasn’t the sort of thing you wanted then”
“You’re a very emotional person. I think I struggled with that”
“I can be… overly emotional. In working on it. Trying not to overthink everything so much.” I said “How do you think it felt for me sitting here miles deep in overthinking as to why you weren’t talking to me, that you were mad, that I did something wrong, all the while you just sat there playing chess completely unaware I was even upset being quiet because… you like to sit quietly.”
“I saw you were upset… when it was too late. By the time I picked up on it you crying so far down an emotional rabbit hole even if I did know How to deal with it, it was kinda too late”
“And yes that is on you for not noticing my emotions but also on me for not being clearer with them, literally could have fixed all my overthinking with, Benny are you mad at me? But no I wanted to sit there pouting getting more and more anxious waiting for you to figure out that I was worried.”
“I always felt like a dick for asking you what was wrong,”
“Because I wanted you to pick up on it. I didn’t want to tell you I just wanted you to pick up and fix it. And that's on me. That was my issue and I’m getting better. Can’t expect people to know everything. But you're getting better too, learning when people are upset being more outwardly emotional if you need a little coaxing.”
“Or threatening”
“Everyone is different Benny. The sooner you realize that the easier life is. Everyone you speak to, and everyone you see is completely different we all think differently, behave differently, and have different responses to things, and no one can read minds. We all need to give each other a little more slack because we don't know what's going on in their head and they'll never know what's happening in ours. Some people can read emotions across your face like a book, some people need to be told or they'll never learn. I was an emotionally overthinking young woman craving emotional intimacy without having to ask for it. While being in a non-official relationship with a man who can't read emotions, has a hard time expressing his feelings and craves reassurance. On top of the very basic one, what's to fuck one wants to love problem. You surprised it went south?”
“I crave reassurance?”
“Benny. You're a chess player who dresses like a goth pirate.”
“Point taken”
“It's fine people grow and change neither of us are the people we were then”
“That's true” he nods “Can I get the number for your therapist?”
“Why?”
“He sounds good. The fact you rattled all that off is pretty impressive”
“Find your own therapist. Don't want conflicts of interest”
For a moment he was puzzled “You talk about me in therapy?”
“Yeah”
“God was I that much of a cunt?”
“No. You’re my friend. Our lives are very intertwined is all” I laughed leaning on his shoulder
“that’s fair” he laughed “... Do you think I ask for too much? With Beth?”
“I think… you ask for more than she's comfortable with. Let's face it Benny your fighting against an addiction. You might have an ego and you might love chess but you're not physically addicted to it”
“I just feel like in trying so hard, pushing myself so far beyond what I'd normally be comfortable with the least she can do is try”
“if that's how you feel. Then I think she should respond to that”
“I'm not a dick?”
“I don't think so” I smiled
“Thanks y/n. I'm really thankful you came over”
“Well I can't just leave you someone has to try and get you through these gross… feelings you're not used to”
“Can you stay?”
“What?”
“Can you stay? I don't think I wanna be on my own tonight”
“Of course Benny”
We stayed up a little long chatting about things but soon it came time for bed he put up the air bed for himself and I took his bed even if I argued but he let me have it.
I changed borrowing one of his shirts for the night getting cosy in the warm bed.
The lights out the only sound the occasional sound of the New York cars above the basement.
I was about to drift off when I perked up hearing the creek of the door and soon enough the covers moved and Benny crawled in with me
“Hi”
“Hi”
“Did you want your own bed back?”
“No, I just… I don't wanna be alone right now” he says slowly wrapping his arms around me and pulling me tight to his body my hips to his my back to his chest squeezing me almost like I was his teddy bear
“Okay Benny, you don't need to worry I'll be right here,” I reassured letting him squeeze me tightly to his body, he held me tight pressing his lips to my shoulder
“Can I get my anger out?” He asked
“Alright” I nodded
He moved and pushed me down on my back “Are you sure?”
“I’m sure,” I nodded
He nodded and leant down to nibble and kiss my neck, before he pulled down his boxers and tugged off my panties, he started off gently slipping himself inside me he held my hips firmly digging his nails into my skin as he aggressively thrusted, often bitting his lips and gritting his teeth letting out his frustration and anger though the movement of his hips. He began to slow so I smiled and held his hips gently turning us so he laid on his back and I sat on top of him gently moving my hips slowly “Reveling in your anger is not going to make you feel better” I smiled stroking his stomach as I moved
“I know. I just wanted to get the anger out” he sighed moving his hips with me
“Wouldn’t this be nicer?”
“It is much nicer.” he smiled “Nice and calming” He cooed sitting up a little and wrapping his arms around me to pull me into his chest for an intense kiss I smiled into the kiss as I moved my hips faster trying to match his own speed getting more and more intense the longer it went on I knew I was close starting to nibble on his neck as I began to slow getting close to my edge he noticed and smirked making sure to work as hard as he could letting out the last of his frustration until I reached my peak biting his neck as I did which in turn got him to his own edge burying himself deep inside me and riding it out before he collapsed against the bed and I basically fell off onto the other side
“Feel better now Benny?”
“Yeah” he nods between gasps “That is way better than therapy”
“They're not mutually exclusive Benny.”
“I still think this is better”
“You can’t just ignore your feelings and deal with your frustrations through sex” I told him
He smirked and turned over to spoon me “Did it work?”
“...yes but?”
“Did it work?”
“Yes.”
“Then I'm gonna do it” he shrugs
“Alright Benny, if that’s how you wanna deal with your feelings” I laughed “Come on, let's get some sleep”
“Alright, Night”
“Night” I smiled giving him a little kiss before we cuddled up and drifted off to sleep.
I yawned as I woke up I gently pushed Benny’s arms off me climbed out the bed and headed across the apartment, I went to the kitchen and began to make coffee humming to myself a little.
“Morning,” Benny spoke up from the bedroom door
“Morning, How are you feeling today?”
“Better. Much better” he smiled coming and wrapping his arms around me giving my neck some kisses “You always make me feel better”
“I do?”
“You do. I’m sorry”
“For what?”
“For being a dick, when we…” he began “I realize it and I’m sorry”
“That's very sweet. Apology accepted. I’m sorry for how I was too”
“Apology accepted” he smiled
“I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with the shit from Beth”
“It’s fine. I know how to deal with it”
“Oh?”
“She can find another doormat. She wants to drink and wants to go on her own she can. I don’t want that. We can be friends if she wants but nothing more than that. I don’t feel like I want anything more”
“Okay. I’m proud of you, for expressing your feelings” I smiled
“Did you wanna stay for a while? Spend some time together?”
“Is that also part of you dealing with this?” I giggled turning to face him
“Kinda. But Now I know what you wanted. And I want that too. Maybe now we're a little older we’ll be better, more communicative, better with our feelings. So? Did you wanna try again?”
“On one condition.”
“Oh?”
“Go to therapy, Benny.”
“Do I have to?”
“Yes.”
“How much therapy?”
“How about one session, one date.”
“Three dates one session”
“Two.” “Deal” he smiled pulling me into a sweet kiss “Will you help me find one?”
“Yes, I will.” I giggled “Come on we’ll have coffee and a cuddle”
“Sounds perfect”
#tbs smut#thomasbrodiesangster#tbs imagine#tbs imagines#thomas sangster imagine#thomas brodie sangster smut#thomas sangster#thomas brodie sangster imagine#thomas brodie sangster#tbs#benny smut#benny fanfic#benny#benny watts#benny watts smut#tqg benny watts#benny watts imagine#bennywattssmut
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HEAR ME OUT!! Please please please!!
Yandere!prince who fell in love with the lady in waiting of the princess he is supposed to marry
A forbidden love that he is ready to do WHATEVER it take to make it happend
Why would he marry a princess when there this being who can but the queen of fae to shame with theire beauty ?
I'M LISTENING NONNIE!!
Yan! Prince x (neutral-f/m) Lady-in-waiting reader
I've actually written fics similar to this concept! This one is about a princess and a crown prince, the crown prince was supposed to marry another noble of higher status but the crown prince and priest found a way to make you the wife instead! (fem! reader)
This one is about reader being the former Empress' lady-in-waiting with the crown prince snatching reader from his brother's grasp! You were supposed to marry his brother (a knight) but he broke his legs and gave him the illusion of choice by becoming a priest instead. (gn intersex reader)
And as for this concept...
mmh... I can see the Yan! Prince going feral over you... you are the most beautiful woman (right?) he has ever laid his eyes on, even more than the garden of flowers he fancies so much! What do you like? What do you dislike? He wants to know everything about you this instant. He needs to.
I don't have much to say but yeah, Yan! Prince is capable of doing anything, even going as far as convincing everyone with the stage he prepares for you. Oh, you are a guy? Just keep up with the farce and no one will know though he would wonder why the princess had a guy dressed as her lady-in-waiting... were you her fucktoy or what? That irritates him and you are not spared with his gentle ass.
I'll use Erickson again for this idea (hehehe crown prince...). Erickson, falling in love with you? The crown prince? Say goodbye to your kneecaps or ankles once he gets his hands on you.
So how does he annul this whole wedding? With the help of his twin brother, they'll both dig or make scandals that will trample the princess family's reputation. It's nothing hard for two people of status and power after all.
Now that her reputation is tarnished, the prince's family will annul the wedding and he'll convince his mother to take you in as one of her ladies-in-waiting. He'll praise you and coax her mother into taking you in, anything, as long as you get to stay under the same roof as him. You bet your life would be a living hell the moment you upset or piss him off even just for the slightest.
Next would be having your hand in marriage. This will be tough, considering his status as the crown prince. Should he convince the former Empress to make his brother the next Emperor instead? He doubts she'll allow it as the prophet's dice had chosen him to be the eldest despite being born second.
If he can't do that, then all he has to do is make a stage for you, a fake family of reputation that was at the edge of a downfall, convincing rumors of you circulating around the citizens and a load of lessons about the royalties' history.
Now that you are completely perfect, suitable to be his suitor, this nation's Empress, another problem spurts out. Noel, his brother, has also taken a liking to you.
Seriously, of all the affections he had received, he wishes to have you as well? He sure is a gutsy bastard, perhaps he should strip him from his status as a knight to teach him a lesson?
The same turn of events happened again, Noel's legs were broken, he was sent to the church and you were wed to Erickson, everything was smooth perfect.
Depending on Noel's love for you, if it was high, it'll reach the same conclusion, with him coming back to overthrow Erickson in the name of the church and God. The only difference was that you did not share that much fondness for the two of them, alas the ending had you died without any last words to them.
If his brother didn't love you that much, he wouldn't return and you are forever stuck with him until he dies. (yup, you don't get to die first, magic is not as hard as it seemed.)
#yandere male#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere scenarios#yandere x you#yandere imagines#male yandere#yandere insert#yandere oc#yandere headcanons#yandere works#yandere writing#reader insert#x reader#oc#x gn reader#CatboX
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Hello! Forgive me for the strange and invasive question I’m about to ask, but I noticed in your bio that you’re a mother and you seem to be a danmei fan as well, and my question pertains to that.
I’m in my mid 20s and enjoy danmei. I read 2ha before the published paperbacks came out and was pretty excited to be able to eventually own physical copies of the story i love so much. But I somehow end up feeling very self conscious about buying them, since they contain multiple explicit scenes and I’m worried if someone were to browse my bookshelf someday and come across these, they’d judge me harshly. I’m not sure if marriage is in the cards for me, but if/when I do end up getting married and having children, how exactly would I explain having these books to my husband and kid(s)? In my country, joint families are fairly common so I also might end up having to live with my husband’s parents and I’d be toast if they were to come across these 😬. I know it seems silly to be worried about a hypothetical future husband and children but I’m afraid I can’t help it. Since you have kids, how do you manage keeping your danmei novels? Do you hide them, or just tell them they’re books for adults?
Anon you sound like you've got some pretty incredible hang-ups about sex. Are you this worried about if my kids find the scene in MDZS where Wen Chao has to eat is own legs? Or if I allow your hypothetical, are you worried what your spouse and kids would think of that kind of content?
The 2ha books are books. I keep them with the books. I have a dedicated shelf for danmei in my bedroom, and they're there. My kids have seen me reading them and can access them anytime and have never given a single fuck or shown any interest whatsoever in what I'm reading, EXCEPT when I'm reading shounen manga and then they're excited. Oh or that time I read some Pokémon manga. And sometimes they're interested in the YA queer graphic novels I get from tbe library. Okay yeah if I'm reading comics they sometimes care. But a prose book? Zero fucks given. I tell them nothing, because they don't ask, but if they did ask, I'd tell them a simplified version of the truth, and I know my kids: zero fucks would continue to be given.
This whole "omg ~sex~" thing doesn't exist unless you as the adult make it exist. I don't act like there's some great mystery they're missing out on but will be ~initiated into the secrets of~ when they're older. That is the surest way to make them desperate to know things they're not ready for. They've had some age-appropriate sex-ed in the Our Whole Lives program offered at our church, and the one time I made the mistake of thinking my son knew more than he did (he knew sperm + egg = baby, so I assumed he knew penis inside vagina was the process. I assumed wrong.) his reaction was a hilarious, "they do WHAT?" and he has never brought it up again. The other day we read a book that included a joke about a teenage man being given a shirt that says "I make chicks hot" (he was going to work at a fast good joint, the joke was its about literal chicken) and my son looked me dead in the eye and said "that joke is NOT age appropriate." He's almost 9, so I told him puberty is coming whether he wants it to or not, and I'd rather he know these feelings exist before the first time they happen than be blindsided when they do (I didn't say, "if they do," I figure the nuances of my utterly asexual non-awakening aren't a detail he needs quite yet.)
All of which is to say, I find this ask utterly baffling and it honestly feels like a trap, but I'm trying to take it in good faith, and in good faith, anon, I'm telling you this:
If the hypothetical husband in your scenario would disapprove of what you're reading, then why the fuck is hypothetical you marrying him?
If the hypothetical kids in this scenario might find age-inappropriate materials, why aren't you worried about the violence? Or the horror parts? And why is hypothetical you telling the hypothetical kids anything at all about the books? Did they ask??? Or are you thinking hypothetical future you is so terrified of being caught with sexy books that you're the one bringing up adult stuff, unsolicited, to these kids? Cause THAT'S the weird thing to do. Going "and just so you know, kids, these books are for ADULTS" when they haven't paid any attention at all is going to create a problem where none exists. I'm not gonna pretend the kid doesn't exist who isn't more interested in what their parents read than mine are about my reading, and of course some kids will end up in traumatic situations that result in them knowing more than they normally would about these topics, and that's tragic that some kids have that happen. But in my experience of the kids I used to run into when I worked in schools, my own kids, their friends, etc., these kids have absolutely zero, zilch interest. When my kids ask what kinds of books I'm reading, I say books about men in ancient China. That leads to immediate negative interest cause it sounds dry and boring to them. Problem (no actual problem existed) solved.
You want to know what IS hard to talk about?
Warning them about predators.
When it's never once crossed their minds that anyone would have any interest in their private parts - because they're just a normal part of their body - having to explain that if a grown-up touches them in certain places, or asks to look at them naked, or tries to get them alone, etc., then they have to say no and find an adult they trust. When they were younger, explaining THAT was hard.
I'm not afraid of what my kids might find in a book. They're not interested, and even if they were, these books are above their literacy level right now (my son has nearly finished his first chapter book! It's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I'm very proud of him). And if they could somehow read a book this hard, and understand it, and accidentally read an age inappropriate part, and and and... well, then, we'd talk about it. I trust them to come to me if they run into media they're uncomfortable with, and I also check in periodically to open the door. And they have sometimes brought up concerns, and we talk about it, and that's that. The hardest right now to explain? What the alt-right pipeline might look like in a Minecraft YouTuber video. Fuck but that is HARD to communicate to kids who have only the vaguely idea of the current political situation.
Honestly I'm more worried they'll read the part where the demon mom eats her own child alive. That is the most triggering scene I've ever encountered in fiction. I've never read the whole chapter.
But you didn't even think of that. Because you're too busy thinking about how to tell your non-existent kids that these books have SEX and it's not for KIDS and they shouldn't read it.
Anon, I'm not afraid of what my kids might get exposed to in books.
I'm afraid of what real people might do to hurt my kids, and how I prepare them for actual trauma.
A book can't hurt them. Well, maybe if someone throws it at them. But if they read something that freaks them out they know to just. Stop reading. And they can ask us about it and we can help unpack it.
But preparing them for the harm actual humans can do to them? Explaining why we're at a BLM protest? Explaining why they have to be wary of any stranger OR NON-STRANGER (because most abuse is by someone the child knows!) who wants access to their body isn't okay? Having to wrap my head around "I don't think any of our relatives are sex abusers but IF they secretly are what language do I use to convey to my child that their aunt, uncle, cousin, grandparent, shouldn't have access to their body in certain ways but still can touch you to wipe poop off"? Trying to say "I know you like this person's minecraft persona but if they start saying mean things about a group of people different from them you have to stop watching and tell a grown-up"? Knowing there's no warning on the planet that can prepare them for all the actual harm that can come to them from real people? That's the hardest part of parenting. I can't protect them without smothering them. I have to let them face some risks or else they'll never develop. I hate this. It's so fucking hard.
Anyway.
That's the hard stuff anon.
You are entirely and utterly worried about the wrong problem.
If this was a good faith ask... you should sit and unpack why you are uniquely worried about the sex parts of 2ha and not the violence parts. You should ask yourself why you think you'd love and marry and raise a family with someone who'd disapprove of your taste in books. You should ask yourself why this is your hang-up, and why you think you'd have to say anything at all about the books to a person browsing your shelf, a spouse, an in-law, a kid.
If this wasn't a good faith ask...idk what you're fishing for, anon, but the fact that you think I'd say anything at all about the contents of a book they are absolutely not ready for is fucking weird. I will say something when they ask and not a moment before, and when they do ask I'll tell them honestly it's a book with a lot of violence and sex and adult stuff and if somehow that didn't drive them away (it would right now, instantly) then that'd suggest maybe they're ready to know more, and I'd steer them to more age-appropriate ways to learn a bit more about sex. There, the problem you made up is solved.
Good luck, anon. Whether this was good faith or not, you have a lot of mental baggage to sort through.
*
I just reread the ask in preparation for posting, and as a few final notes: 1. My wife (no husbands here) knows what I read, 2. My father lives with us, and he knows what I read, 3. My mother in law also knows what I read, and it makes her uncomfortable I think but she recognizes that's a "her" problem and leaves me alone, and 4. My mother is chomping at the bit to get her hands on my 2ha, she's been very disappointed that most of the danmei she's borrowed post MDZS and SVSSS hasn't been more "like that." So don't assume your in-laws will flip out. Most people know books are just books. But I also don't know your culture/country/situation. I was raised by incredibly progressive people in one of the most socially progressive cities in the world (New York City, we have race problems but in other areas we're not bad), and like. My entire cultural surroundings are chill about stuff. I'm also not Christian. Obviously in another culture with stricter mores I can see why this could be more of an issue but you asked how I handle it and I can only give an honest answer from the actual reality I live in, which is that it never has crossed my mind anyone would care and sure enough, no one has cared. 🤷 I'm sorry if that's led me to be dismissive of legitimate concerns, it's very hard to know what anons on tumblr are well intentioned and which are from people who are just waiting to go HA THAT EVIL PERSON PUTS THE NAUGHTY DIRTY BAD PORN WHERE THE KIDS CAN GET IT. Considering that people have been sending me asks recently that my son should die, or that he will grow up to be a rapist because that's what men do, because my post that maybe people shouldn't hate men has brought enough attention that the fucking weirdos think lashing out at an 8 year old is an entirely normal and reasonable response to "stop virulently hating men just because they are men," I hope you can understand why my tone is what it is and why I have to consider that this ask is not being sent in good faith. Those anons I block and delete unanswered, so me writing this response is already giving you some benefit of the doubt.
Regardless. Work on you first, anon. You deserve people who will love you even knowing that sometimes you read kinky shit, and do not under any circumstances tell your kids, should you have them, a word more than they need to know. If they're very precocious early readers MAYBE move the books, but otherwise odds are they won't be able to even read the back blurbs, much less the inside, until they're old enough to know a little about how life works, and you can frame what you tell them to what they know then.
Alright, I'll shut up now.
#unforth rambles#unforth replies#i spent entirely too long on this entire too early in the morning#no fandom tag on this one i think
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Maybe in another life
Word count: 1.3k Warnings: None ? Summary: Todd meets Neils sister Diane, and convinces the other Poets to have one last meeting so he can introduce her to them. Tags:Dead Poets Society, Neil Perry, Todd Anderson, Charlie Dalton, Knox Overstreet, Gerard Pitts, Steven Meeks, Richard Cameron, AnderPerry Note: THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING AND PUBLISHING A FANFICTION??? HELP ME?? SORRY IF ITS HORRIBLE ?? CONSTRUCTIVE(!) CRITISM IS ALWAYS WELCOME <3
The days following Neil's death were silent, no one knew what to say. Barely a word was spoken between the boys, they had gotten some time off to deal with the news, and prepare for the funeral.
Todd was lying on the now empty right side bed, Neil’s mother had come in the day before to clear out all his stuff and had even told him he could keep something of Neil’s to ‘remember him by’.
Todd had chosen the script of ‘A midsummer night's dream’ and a sweater. A knock sounded on the other side of the door and Todd rose from the bed,
“Come in.” Meeks walked in,
‘‘It’s almost starting, are you ready to go?’’ Todd nodded and followed Meeks out the door and through the corridor. They walked silently, side by side through the halls toward the church next to the school where the service would be held.
They slid into the bench next to Charlie, Knox & Pitts who were already seated, Todd looked around and saw Neil’s parents sitting on the front row, right beside Nolan. The headmaster rose from his seat and stood up on the podium.
“The death of Neil Perry was a tragic accident.” Nolan began,
“Liar.” Todd muttered under his breath.
“He was a fine student, one of Welton’s best, and he will be missed.” Nolan continued, “We have contacted each of your parents to explain the situation. Naturally, all are quite concerned. At the request of Neil’s family, I intend to conduct a thorough inquiry into this matter. Your complete cooperation is expected.”
-
After the service, everyone slowly made their way out to the courtyard. Todd walked behind his friends,
“You guys go ahead, there’s something I need to check on.”
He started towards the cemetery where they had just buried Neil. When he got there he saw there was already another person there, a girl, she couldn’t have been any older than he was.
Todd slowly approached her, and stood a few feet apart from her, looking at Neil’s grave. The girl didn’t seem to notice him at first, as she continued to rearrange the white roses that were placed around Neil’s grave. Todd thought he had seen her before, but he just couldn’t figure out why she looked so familiar.
After she had finished what she was doing, the girl turned her head to look at Todd.
She noticed how heartbroken he looked, how pale his skin was, how red his eyes were from crying.
“Did you know him well?” She asked him, Todd looked up, “Neil, did you know him well?”
“Oh yeah, we were roommates, you?” Todd looked at her, who was it that she reminded him of?
“Yeah, he was my brother.” Todd looked her in the eyes for the first time since they met,
“What?”
He took in her features and realized she looked just like him, hell she could even be him.
“Yeah he is, was, a year and a half older than me.” Todd was staring at her as if she were a ghost.
“You look just like him.”
“Yeah I get that a lot.” She smiled sadly.
“I’m Todd Anderson by the way.” He held out his hand for her to shake, “So you’re that Todd!” She shook his hand,
“I’m Diane Perry.’’
The bell in the tower struck, indicating that dinner was about to be served at Welton. ‘‘I uh
have to go, dinners about to be served.’’
“Todd said.” Diane looked up, “Yeah I should probably make my way back as well. It was nice meeting you.”
Diane started making her way back down the small path that led to the village,
“Wait!” Todd called after her, she turned around, “Do you want to meet the other boys?”
She smiled, “I’d love to.”
“Okay, uh, awesome, meet me back here around 8:30.”
“See you then Todd.” Todd waved and as he made his way back to Welton, he felt that everything might be okay.
Dinner was silent, no one looked at each other. “Guys, meet me at the cave tonight at half past 8?”
Todd suddenly spoke, everyone looked surprised.
“What, are you crazy? Why would we go back there?” Knox spoke,
“Please guys, I have a surprise.”
“I am never going back to that place.” Charlie said.
“Yeah, I’ve got homework to do anyway.” Meeks agreed.
“Come on guys, please. Just one last time.” Todd pleaded, he really needed this to work. “No, and now I don’t want to talk about it anymore!” Knox raised his voice, clearly sounding upset. Todd was starting to lose hope, “For Neil, please.”
Charlie sighed, “What’s this surprise you have for us anyway?”
“Come to the cave tonight and you’ll see.”
“Well it better be good.” Pitts said, getting up from the table and getting his stuff together.
“This is the Last time I will be going back there. Understood?” Knox also got up,
“Great, awesome, don’t forget, half past 8.” The remaining boys all got up and made their way back to their rooms.
-
“What’s taking him so long?” Knox was getting impatient, “It’s 8:45 already!” “Dude relax,” Charlie tried to calm him down, “He’ll be here soon.”
“If he’s not here in 5 minutes I’m leaving.” Pitts decided, Meeks nodding in agreement.
Just then, Todd walked into the cave, “Sorry I’m late guys, had to pick up the surprise.”
“It better be good,” Knox grumbled, still upset. “So where is this surprise anyway?” Charlie asked, just as Diane stepped into the cave.
“She’s right here.”
The boys’ jaws collectively dropped as they looked at the girl before them, the girl who had the Same brown eyes, the Same brown hair, the Same nose, even the same smile as him. No one dared to speak a word. Scared that if they did, she might disappear.
Todd broke the silence by introducing her; “Guys this is Diane, she’s Neils sister.” Diane nodded and Todd continued, “Diane this is Knox, Charlie, Meeks and Pitts. A.K.A the Dead Poets Society.”
“I heard you guys have meetings? Where you read poetry?” Diane looked to Meeks, who seemed quite smart to her, and would probably explain it best.
“Yeah, we take turns reading poetry, some from the greats, some original pieces.” Diane nodded, “I actually have a poem I prepared to read tonight.” Diane cleared her throat, ready to start when Charlie interrupted,
“We’ve got to open the meeting first.”
Pitts agreed, “You can’t just start reading poetry.”
“Well then would someone open the meeting please?” Diane looked around and realized that as soon as she asked the question the cave fell silent.
Pitts had taken a sudden interest to his shoes, Charlie acted as though he had never seen a cave wall before in his life, Meeks felt the need to clean is already clean glasses thoroughly and Todd just stared off into the distance, as if he wasn’t even here.
“He always opened the meetings.” Knox spoke.
“Excuse me?”
“Neil, he always opened our meetings.” Knox got up, “Listen Todd, I don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish by bringing her here. But we’ve all gotta move on.”
“What are you talking about?” Todd got up as well, “I understand you’re just trying to help.” Knox continued; “But you gotta face the reality, Neils dead, we might all be facing expulsion, and Keating is being investigated. I’m sorry, but I’m leaving, I can’t take this anymore.” Knox made his was out the cave,
“Knox! Wait! Come back!” Todd tried to chase after him.
“It’s no use,” Meeks spoke, “he’s gone.”
“He was right though,” Pitts also got up, “We shouldn’t be doing this.” He started making his way out the cave too.
Todd felt all hope he had that afternoon disappear, everything was falling apart.
“I’m sorry Todd.” Charlie looked Todd in the eyes, “Maybe one day we’ll return.” Charlie put on his coat and followed Pitts outside.
“Meeks, please, you can’t leave.” Todd pleaded, feeling his eyes fill up with tears. But Meeks had already gotten up, and was halfway out the cave,
“Goodnight Todd.” RAAAAAAHHHH DO U GUYS LIKE THIS??? DO U WANT A PART TWO????
#dead poets society#neil perry#todd anderson#charlie dalton#knox overstreet#gerard pitts#steven meeks#anderperry#jamroses
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12 Days of Ficmas ❅ Day 3
Word Count: 4.0K Paring: Tommy Shelby x Fem!Reader Prompt @12-days-of-ficmas: anonymous donor pays for the kids at your nonprofit to have a perfect Christmas. Wait, this handwriting looks familiar Warnings: mature language
Summary: For a little over half a decade, (Y/N) has run the Angel's Touch Foundation caring for children in need from all over Small Heath. But times are hard and money is tight, and all she wants is to give the children of her foundation the best Christmas. And an anonymous letter might just have all the answers she has been searching for.
A/N: goodness, I love angst a little too much. I think y'all might need to prepare for a christmas filled with just a tad of sad 🫣🫣
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Life in Small Heath had never been easy. Life in England had not been easy in general. At least not for the everyday man, much less for their children.
(Y/N) had dedicated her life to making sure no child went hungry in her town. With what little money her family had left her, she had started a foundation in their name to do just that. For a little over half a decade, the woman had seen to it that no child went hungry or homeless, especially during the holidays.
It had been hard to keep Angel’s Touch afloat for years. Keeping the foundation running smoothly required more money than was flowing in most of the time, but she somehow always pulled it off. She didn’t care if she went hungry herself for a couple of days or if she lived in the smallest apartment she could afford. All she wanted was to make sure no child went through the hardships that had been bestowed upon them with no fault to them. As hard as it was. She pulled through every year, and she would continue to do so for as long as she could.
That particular year had been particularly difficult, with their government funding being cut in almost half, a slow influx of donations, and the amounts of intakes growing (Y/N) didn’t know how they had even made it to December without more struggles.
“I don’t know how we’re gonna give the kids a good Christmas celebration this year, Margaret,” she sighed as she sat on her desk chair. “We’re barely making it as it is, and I don’t even know where we’ll get the necessary funding for next year.”
“Well, we could always ask…”
“So help me, Margaret, if you say what I think you’re gonna say, I’ll fire you right now,” (Y/N) warned. “I don’t care that you’re my closest friend and one of the only reasons I’m still standing.”
“I’m just saying, love. He could help,” Margaret shrugged as she placed a cup of tea before the woman. “But I understand why you don’t want to call him. We could try the church again. Grovel to the Father for some more donations. At least enough to give the kids a Christmas dinner.”
“Yeah,” she responded, ignoring the fact that her friend had tried to bring up the one man she had wanted nothing more than to forget. “I’ll try to call some family friends or try to kiss up to politicians and remind them or their re-elections. Maybe see if my brother has any money to spare. I just need to find someone with big and loose pockets for this month. Then, we can worry about next year.”
“You’ll find a way,” Margaret said with a comforting smile. “Somehow, you always do.”
“Just one year,” she begged. “All I want is for one year to go smoothly.”
“Oh, darling, we didn’t get into this business because it was easy,” the woman reminded her. “We do it so the children don’t suffer under someone else.”
“Right,” (Y/N) smiled. “For the children.”
“We’ll make it through, darling. Don’t worry your pretty little face.”
It was easier said than done, that much (Y/N) knew. She made more phone calls than she had ever done in her lifetime, trying her best to reach everyone and anyone who would listen. As Christmas day approached, she felt her time running short. Money poured in slowly, and it was spent twice as fast. At the rate they were going, it would have surprised her if all they could give the kids was a hot mutton stew.
But what (Y/N) didn’t know was that a higher power was in play. Something and someone she had no control over.
A week before Christmas, after receiving another shipment of donations of basic necessities, two of the children she housed ran after her down the halls. “Ms. (Y/N)!” they yelled as they ran. “Ms. (Y/N)!”
“Woah, Helen, William, slow down,” she chuckled softly. “You know there’s no running in the halls.”
“We’re sorry, Ms. (Y/N),” Helen smiled angelically. “But there was a postie outside. Left a package for you.”
“Yeah, he said it was urgent.”
The boy extended a pristine envelope sealed with the crest of England. “Alright, thank you, kids,” she smiled “Now, go on, darlings. Go get some lunch.”
Once the children were out of sight, (Y/N) hurried to her office. The envelope didn’t say who it was from, but her name was written on it in the most beautiful calligraphy she had ever seen. Inside the room, she put aside the box she was carrying and sat quickly by her desk to see what inside the letter was so urgent.
“Slow down, woman,” Margaret chuckled as the woman pushed her aside. “What do you have there?”
“I don’t know,” she said. “Helen and William gave it to me. Said a letter man had dropped it off, and it was urgent.”
“Looks quite official, doesn’t it? Does it say who it's from?”
“No. It only has my name.”
“Well, what are you waiting for?” Margaret smiled. “Open it already.”
“Alright, alright,” she chuckled as she pulled out her letter opener. The wax came off the paper easily and, inside, (Y/N) found two pieces of paper. But it was the one in front that caught her attention. “Oh, fuck.”
“(Y/N), such foul language,” Margaret laughed. “What is it?”
“Someone has donated sixty thousand pounds to the foundation,” she choked out. “Do you know what this means, Margaret?”
“Oh, fuck.”
“My sentiments exactly,” she laughed. “We are more than set for Christmas, Margaret. And not just the holidays. We’re set for next year!”
“Happy fucking Christmas,” the woman exclaimed. “Does it say who it’s from? We need to do something to honor whoever it was that decided to answer our prayers.”
“Uh,” she stammered as she looked for a name. “It doesn’t say.”
“Anonymous donor? I mean, people do get rather generous during the holidays.”
“Yeah, I just wish we could thank whoever it was,” (Y/N) said. “But, we have enough planning to do now. Christmas is in a week!”
“Don’t you worry, darling,” Margaret smiled. “Everything will be perfect.”
As her friend set off to work, making phone calls and ensuring deliveries, (Y/N) looked over the second paper in the envelope. There wasn’t a name there either, but she recognized the lettering far too perfectly. In a handwriting that she wished she had forgotten the words: Happy Christmas to you and the children.
At that moment, she wanted to break down. It had been years since she had spoken to him, much less heard a word from him. Yet, somehow, when she needed him most, he appeared like a knight in shining armor. In a simple cheque, he had been able to resolve her biggest worry. All it took was the stroke of a pen, and all her problems had disappeared. It was just so easy for him.
But she couldn’t come undone. Not when there was so much to be done.
In the blink of an eye, seven days had passed, and the Angel’s Touch Foundation was preparing for a feast. Every single one of the kids had received their fair share of toys, clothes, and anything else they might have wanted. It was truly something out of a fairytale.
Their entire home had been decorated from top to bottom for the holidays. It made the children very excited to see the place filled with Christmas lights and decorations, and many a kid stopped to gawk at the massive tree that had been propped up at the foundation’s lobby. Everything was beautiful and perfect.
(Y/N)’s mind should have been focused on the kids and their happy faces. She should have been zoned into their reactions when they got to open presents that morning or their surprise when they were told what they’d be having for dinner. That’s what should have been running through her head.
Yet, since she had received that letter, only one thing lived in her mind. His name and his face swirled around in her brain like it was the only thought that mattered. It consumed her every waking moment and filled her dreams with images of him. She had done so well to avoid him for years, and with just a few words, he was all she could think about.
After dinner, while the kids all played and laughed a floor below, she found herself inspecting the piece of paper that had started her spiral. Maybe the longer she looked at it, something would happen. Maybe it would make him walk through the doors…
“Darling, you can’t spend the rest of the night locked up in here,” Margaret said as she walked in with two glasses of whiskey. “We’re supposed to be celebrating.”
“I am,” she smiled softly. “I just… it’s this letter. I haven’t stopped thinking about it.”
“There’s no point to dwell on it, dear. There’s no name.”
“I know who sent it.”
“What?” Margaret gasped. “So, there was a name?”
“No,” (Y/N) chuckled dryly. “I recognized the handwriting. Instantly, actually. And I haven’t been able to get it out of my head.”
“It was him, wasn’t it?” the woman inquired. “It was Thomas.”
“It was,” she sighed. “I just don't understand how he could have known. I haven’t seen him in years, and then he shows up out of the blue with this letter.”
“Darling, Small Heath is big but not big enough,” her friend mused. “Why don’t you go see him? It’s been long enough, don’t you think?”
“And say what, Margaret? That I ran away from our home, and he’s somehow still saving me? I… I can’t go see him.”
“But you want to,” she said. “And you know where he lives. Everyone does. So, just go to him.”
“He’ll turn me away.”
“It’s Christmas,” Margaret smiled. “He won’t turn you away on Christmas. Now, there’s a car waiting for you downstairs. So, go, love. Stop waiting around.”
(Y/N) didn’t know what had possessed her, but her legs moved faster than her brain could think. And before she knew it, she was in the black car headed toward Arrow House. She could have told the driver to turn back around at any second, proclaimed she had lost her mind, and the best thing she could do was sleep off the madness. But the car kept moving, and the distance became bigger. Then, the grandiose house was looking down on her, beaconing her closer and closer. Once she was out of the car, her decision was made for her. The only way was onward.
She knocked on the front doors, thinking there couldn’t possibly be anyone up at that hour. One second more, and she would have walked herself back home. Yet, the door opened wide, and an older woman opened the door. “Hello,” she smiled. “May I help you, dear?”
“Oh, um, perhaps you could,” (Y/N) stammered. “I was looking for Mr. Shelby.”
“Of course,” the woman said. “Come in. He’s just in his study.”
“This late into the night?” she questioned as she followed the woman inside. “I thought perhaps he would have already gone to bed.”
“Mr. Shelby keeps odd hours,” she explained. “But I think you knew that if you yourself are coming at this hour.”
“Right,” (Y/N) chuckled. “I guess if he had been asleep, I could have used that as an excuse to leave.”
“He was expecting you earlier in the week, Ms. (Y/L/N). But I guess you were quite busy with Angel’s Touch.”
The woman’s words stopped her in her tracks. “You know who I am?” she asked. “And you knew I’d be coming?”
“Of course, I know who you are. It’s my job to know,” she smiled. “Well, we’re here.” She knocked on the door before them and opened it ever so softly. “Mr. Shelby?”
“Yes, Frances?”
“Ms. (Y/L/N) has arrived.” Frances beckoned the woman inside, and she did as told. “I’ll leave you to it, then.”
(Y/N) heard his voice before she saw him, and she felt shivers running down her body. His head snapped toward her the second he heard her name, and the cigarette he had just lit threatened to fall out of his mouth as he stared.
They stood there in silence for what felt like an eternity, wondering if the image before them was a hallucination like the ones they’d had before. Maybe they were scared. Maune they thought the second one of them moved, the other would disappear.
“(Y/N).” Tommy was the first to speak. But his voice was so low it was almost as though he hadn’t, almost like he had said it as a prayer. “You’re here.”
“Yes,” she breathed, her heart fluttering against her chest and threatening to jump outside of her body. “I came to thank you for your very generous donation.”
“Ah, so Angel’s Touch is yours,” he said nonchalantly as his demeanor changed to the mask he always wore. “I was simply trying to do a good deed this Christmas. The name of the foundation sounded familiar, but I had no way of knowing you were the one running it.”
“You don’t have to pretend, Tommy. You already knew it was,” (Y/N) commented as she took a tentative step toward him. “Why now? After all these years, why have you reached out now?”
“I have no need to pretend,” he announced as he filled a glass with whiskey. “I was truly just doing a good thing.”
“Right,” she conceded. “Well, I’ll simply thank you then. And since you did not leave a return address I had to come personally to give my gratitude. Your donation has changed the lives of many children.”
“Good. That’s what I wanted.”
“Alright then. I guess I’ll see myself out. Since you were only doing a generous thing.” (Y/N) turned, fully determined to walk out the doors and leave him with the same indifference with which he was treating her. But she couldn’t walk away. Not again. “Oh, cut the fucking bullshit, Tommy, and give me a real answer. Why now? I can only assume you’ve always known where I was. So, why did you reach out now?”
Tommy’s eyes found hers, and she swore she could have died at that very moment. She was sure in the infinite blue of his eyes, she could see the love he used to have for her, the love that had died after he had come home from the war. “I reached out because I heard you were in need of donations. Truly,” he explained. “I was going to hand deliver the cheque myself. Even went by the building.”
“I didn’t see you.”
“But I saw you, (Y/N). And I realized there was still so much anger and resentment buried that I decided to send it through the post. Because regardless of how I feel, those children deserve a better life than they were given,” he said defeatedly. His shoulders had fallen and she was starting to see the broken man behind the mask. “Yet, I still wrote that note, and I knew it would bring you around sooner or later.”
“For what, Tommy? Why did you want me to come here?”
“Because I need a fucking explanation!” the man exclaimed, slamming his hands on his desk. “You fucking disappeared as soon as I came home from the war. In the middle of the night. You took your things, and you fucking left. Like I meant nothing to you. And you have the gall to stay in Small Heath. Hidden, but still there. Why, (Y/N)? ‘Cause it wasn’t just me you left. You left the entire family.”
“You’re joking, right? You truly have no idea why I left?” As she was met with silence, (Y/N) couldn’t help but laugh. She crossed the room as she did, staring out the window because it was easier than looking him in the face. “You were a completely different man when you came home. At first, I told myself it was normal. That the things you had seen in the battlefield would have haunted you ‘til the day you died. But then, there were things that could not be attributed to the war.
I know you used the opium to help with your Shell Shock, and I tried. I tried to be okay with it because I truly believed you needed it, Tommy. But you’d be worse after. The nightmares still overtook you and your behavior… well, long gone was the man that used to make me laugh,” she sighed, wrapping her arms across her chest. “And, up to that point, I would have put up with it all because I loved you more than I loved myself. But then, you brought women into our bed. Maybe you thought I hadn’t noticed, or you believed I would keep my mouth shut and let you do as you pleased. Maybe I did wrong by you for allowing things to get to that. Still, I had not expected you to ever raise your hand at me, Tommy.”
“(Y/N),” she heard him call.
“I can understand that you were drunk. Pissed out of your mind with the whiskey and the drugs. But I had told you how my father had treated my mother, and you had promised that you would never stoop that low.” She could feel the tears start to form in the corners of her eyes, threatening to fall down her cheeks in ugly black streaks. “That was the night I decided I would leave because I could not live in a house with a man I was afraid of. I told Polly what my plans were, and she helped me. She gave me enough money to go back to my brother’s, and she promised to keep my secret. I don’t want to think of what would have happened if I had stayed.”
“You know I would have never hurt you, (Y/N).” She could tell his voice was closer but cautious. It was the first time they had spoken, the first time they had gotten answers, and he was not about to lose his chance to understand it all. “I must admit, the man that came back from the war was not the man that left for it. I don’t think such a man even exists. But I would have never hurt you.”
“How can you be so sure, Tommy? You swore that you would have never raised your hand at me, and you did. How far could a strike be? Or perhaps a push or a shove? That’s how it starts,” she shrugged sadly. “If I had stayed… I couldn’t have stayed. It would have ruined us both. I mean, look how well you’ve done for yourself. This house, your business, I’d say everything worked out well for you.”
“It didn’t,” he sighed, stepping even closer. She could feel his presence behind her, looming over her. She could feel the warmth from his body even as the cold from the winter seeped in through the window. “There’s always been something missing.”
“I heard you got married,” she said. “Even got a little boy. I’d say that’s more than enough.”
“My wife is dead. And though, yes, I still have my child, you know what I’ve been missing.”
“You loved her,” she continued. “If love was what you were missing, you had it.”
“That is not what I meant, and you know it, (Y/N).”
“You gave your heart to another. That’s what I know.”
“How could I ever give something that wasn’t there anymore? Something that was taken many years before.” Tommy’s chest was pressed against her back, rising and falling at a dangerous pace. His hands ran up her arms, his touch so soft she thought it was a ghost. But he was there. She could feel his breathing on her neck, feel his heartbeat through his chest. Tommy was there, and she could not deny it. “I’m sorry, (Y/N). The last thing I ever wanted was to lose you.”
“I didn’t want to go, Tommy. You have to believe that,” she sighed as she leaned into his touch. “I didn’t want to, but I had to.”
“I know, but you’re here now. You’ve come back to me,” he whispered in her ear. “Please tell me you’ve come back to me.”
“I can’t go through that again, Tommy. The children at the foundation depend on me, the workers… I cannot go back to the woman I was. I lost myself in you, Thomas Shelby. And if I did that again, I don’t know how I could survive.”
Tommy kissed her neck unexpectedly, savoring her skin as he had done many years before. He breathed her in and sank into the familiarity of her body. He remembered her softness and her warmth, he remembered every curve of her body and the way it would react. He remembered how it had felt to have her belong to him.
But (Y/N) also remembered how lost she had been without him at the start. Being with him meant losing a part of herself. It meant she would no longer be (Y/N) (Y/L/N). She would be Tommy Shelby’s girl. And she didn’t know if she could go back to that. Not when she had done so much to be the woman she was.
Yet, the feeling of his lips on her reminded her of the moments they had been happy. They had been young and in love, and even if they had less, they felt the richest they could have been. His hands reminded her of a time when she had not been afraid of him, when his touch was a welcomed solace and not a dark premonition. It all reminded her of the life they believed they could’ve had.
“Tommy,” she whispered as his kisses became feverish. “Tommy, wait.”
“What?” he groaned. “We’ve waited long enough.”
“If we were to do this, if we were to be in each other’s lives, we need to take things slow,” she said. “I cannot jump into these waters headfirst. I need time.”
“Time,” he chuckled softly. “Time is something we’ve had so much of.”
“And I need more of, Tommy. Please.”
“Alright,” Tommy conceded. And though he wanted to be more annoyed, all he could feel was compassion. “At least stay the night. It’s late, and it’s Christmas. You shouldn’t be out on the road.”
“If this is another ploy to get me into your bed, Mr. Shelby,” she chuckled, turning to look him in the eyes finally. Those icy blue eyes that had always haunted her.
“It’s not,” he smiled. “I can have an entire room set up for you if that’s what you’d prefer.”
“It takes trust, doesn’t it? And it’s already a cold night, I wouldn’t want to freeze until morning.”
With a warm smile on his face, one he hadn’t remembered he could muster, he took (Y/N) in his arms. “Happy Christmas, (Y/N),” he said. “I do hope it was a good one.”
“Well, I certainly haven’t had better in a while,” she chuckled. “But I know it’s the best one Angel’s Touch has seen.”
“The best one yet.”
“Right,” (Y/N) said. “I guess all we needed was a true angel’s touch.”
“I’m no angel, darling. I’m more of a god.”
“I can see the sense of grandeur hasn’t died down,” she chuckled as she leaned into his touch. They walked through the quiet house in each other’s arms, forgetting the past years, forgetting their absence in each other’s lives. They were simply present at that moment, and that moment only. “But I don’t think there’s anything I could do to thank you for what you’ve done.”
“Well, there are a few things I have in mind.”
“Very cheeky, Mr. Shelby,” she grinned. “But that’s not happening any time soon.”
“A man can only hope,” he laughed. “But I’ll take what I can get. As long as you promise you’ll still be here in the morning.”
“I promise, Tommy. I’m not going anywhere.”
Next ->
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In Your Dreams, Jägerman
Alright, I’m on a new kick after watching Nerdy Prudes Must Die. And I am saddened that I couldn’t find any fanfics so again, if I want it I got to write it myself.
This is spicy so those under 18 DO NOT READ! I have warned you.
This has religious stuff, but mostly sex in a church.
“And I was thinking since you’re new in town and you come to my church now. You can help me stop the school dance.”
(Y/N) stopped at her locker giving Grace a look, “why do you want to stop homecoming?”
“Because (Y/N),” she huffed, "I run laps in that gym and I don't want to step on any wayward spunk when they dry hump in there.”
She makes a face at her choice of words and roll her eyes. “Only you Grace would stop a whole dance for that.”
Grace glared at (Y/N) as she closed her locker, “you don’t seem so on board with this (Y/N). Why is that?”
(Y/N) shrugged, “I just wouldn’t go and tell the coach to allow you to run laps around the school.”
Grace blinked at her like her words didn’t make sense.
“I’m still going to stop it.”
She just sighed and watched Grace walk away. She was grateful she at least had one person she new from Hatchetfield. Ever since her parents made her move here for their careers, she wanted to just try and fit in somewhere her senior year. She knew Grace from a church summer camp her parents made her attend.
Her parents and the Chasity’s had the same views with religion, while (Y/N) just went along with whatever her parents said. It was better to just nod along and say nothing then to start her “drama”, as her parents put it.
So she was proclaimed as the “good christian girl” by the students of Hatchetfield High. This new nickname has brought a different kind of attention that she didn’t think was going to happen. But come on what did she expect, there is porn.
“Well, well, well, if it isn’t little miss good girl herself.”
Max Jägerman. The jock and self proclaimed “god” of Hatchetfield High.
She groaned as she tuned around to see Max lean up against the lockers behind her. He grinned at her as she crossed her arms.
“What do you want Max?”
“I just want to know what my good girl is up to. Heading to class?”
“I am not your good girl Max.”
He pushed away from the lockers to step closer to her.
“Oh but you are. You’re saving yourself for special old me.”
She rolled eyes, “in your dreams Jägerman. And as everyone here knows I’m saving myself for god.”
If she was going to be called the “good christian girl”, she might as well act like it.
He grinned as she felt her back hit the lockers and he placed his hands on either side of her to keep her trapped there.
“Yeah, you’re saving yourself for me.” He leaned in close and whispered into her ear, “I’m gonna be your new god baby.”
She pressed her legs together and bite her lip as he placed a small kiss on her neck, under her ear.
“Fuck you Jägerman.”
“Wow, that’s not a very good girl thing to say.” He grinned at her as she stared back at him.
“Just go away and leave me alone,” (Y/N) pushed him off of her and went to walk away before turning back to him.
“And you’re never gonna be a god, Jägerman.”
She started back down the wallway when she heard him shout, “but I already am good girl!”
—————————————————————————————————————
(Y/N) sighed as she laid in bed, staring at the ceiling in thought. Still thinking about the conversation Max and her had.
‘God he’s so stupid, and hot. That wasn’t fair.’
She rolled over with a huff.
“Why is the hot jock the worst guy ever.”
(Y/N) glanced at the clock, 10:00. Ugh, she should sleep before she keeps thinking. She rolled over to the other side and let her body relax, closing her eyes.
——-———————————————————————————————————
Opening her eyes, she looked at her hands folded in front of her, kneeling in prayer.
She snorted with as she looked up and around, her face scrunched in confusion. The church she was in wasn't the one Grace's or her family went to.
It was a big cathedral, an alter in front of her with the Bible open. There were candles everywhere, making the lighting feel intimate.
“Hey there, my good girl.”
(Y/N) gasped and whipped her head toward the husky voice. The voice that she knew all too well.
“Max?” She whispered in shock as he walked toward her in a… priest uniform?
She swallowed harshly as he just smirked at her.
“Have you come here to confess your sins?”
She just stayed silent as he stopped right in front of her, looking down upon her like she belonged there. (Y/N) felt herself get warm at she tried to avoid looking at his groin right in front of her face.
“M-Max, what are you doing?”
He shushed her and placed his hand under her chin to make her look up at him. He grinned as she made eye contact, making her bite at her bottom lip. He groaned and knelt down on the floor so they were face to face.
She couldn’t help but admire him this close. His blue eyes looked dark with the way he was looking at her.
“Do you know how wild you drive me (Y/N)?”He whispered as he leaned into her. She let her eyes start to close as he got near, feeling his breath on her lips. She shook her head.
“I want you to say ‘no sir’.”
She gulped and opened her mouth to let out a shaky breathe.
“No sir.”
He smiled and chuckled, “thats a good girl.”
She let out a whimper as he pressed his lips against hers. His lips were soft and surprisingly gentle as she placed a hand on his shoulder to steady herself.
‘Oh God. this can not be happening right now.’
She pulled away and placed her hand against her lips, closing her eyes. This was making her feel things for him.
Max grabbed her arm to pull her hand away, “whats wrong baby? I thought we were enjoying ourselves?”
(Y/N) looked back at Max. He was smirking again and she quickly stood up.
“Enjoying ourselves? Max we are in a church, we shouldnt be doing,” she threw her hand out to him, “this.”
He smiled and cocked an eyebrow, “I didnt see you complaining. I say that you were even enjoying it.”
He growled at the end of his sentence and (Y/N) couldn’t help the shutter that ran through her body. She quickly moved away from him toward the alter, trying to clear her head.
“Oh god, what am I doing?”
“Well if you’re asking? Then you should be doing me.”
She turned as he snuck up behind her to speak. She yelped as he lifted her up and pushed everything on the alter off of it. She gaped at the bible being thrown on the floor before looking back at Max. He placed her ontop and placed his hand on her thighs. She watched as he pushed her skirt up.
She felt like she couldnt breathe as Max slowly knelt down in front of her.
“I know that you should be on your knees worshipping me, but why not let your god reward you for such devotion.”
She tensed as he said those words to her.
“You’re not my god Max.”
He smirked up at her as he pulled her closer toward him, having her body lean back against the table.
“Oh but I will be baby.”
Before she could say another word she yelled out as he rushed forward and licked up her pussy.
‘Am I not wearing underwear?’
She couldn’t think after that thought because Max Jägerman was licking up her pussy right now. He groaned as he tasted her and sat back a little to run a hand up her thigh. He looked up at her and smiled as she watched him push a finger inside of her.
“You taste heavenly (Y/N).”
She groaned at his words and actions and let her head fall back. She let her body just feel everything that was going on. Moaning loudly as she felt him lick her clit and suck it into his mouth as he added another finger.
“Fuck yes Max. You’re making me feel so good.”
She couldn’t help but to run her hand through his dirty blond hair and give it a tug. He groaned against her and pulled away again.
“Yeah? Is your god making you feel good my dirty girl. Having me eat you out on this alter in god’s house.”
She gasped and snapped her head upt to look at him. He had an evil smile as she tried to breathe and shake her head.
“N-no. you’re not-”
“Yes I am,” Max’s face got serious as he slowed his fingers from moving.
(Y/N) whined and moved her hips to try and make him move again.
“Tell me I’m your god (Y/N).”
“No,” she exhaled.
He grabbed her thigh and pulled it close as he bite down. She screamed as the pain hit her at the same time Max started moving his fingers again, harder into her. He released her skin and smirked at the dark red amrk on her thigh.
“Tell me,” he growled.
He looked back into her eyes as she watched him. She could feel herself start to tense and the burning inside of her get hotter.
“Say ‘you’re my god Max’,” he said in a condescending tone, “and I’ll let you cum.”
She felt her mouth fall open as he leaned down to suck her clit back into his mouth. As she started to get right to where she wanted he started to pull away again. She quickly wrapped her legs around his back and gripped his hair into her hand.
“You’re my God! You’re so amazing please god let me cum! Please Max!”
He smirked against her and nodded his head as she looked down to see his eyes open up to look at her.
“Cum in my mouth my good girl.”
—————————————————————————————————————
(Y/N) shot up in bed as she cried out and grabbed at her blanket. She blinked her eyes rapidly as she looked around her bedroom.
She let out a whine as she fell back into bed and threw her hands to her face. She moved a leg and felt something on her thighs. She pulled up her blanket to see a pillow shoved in between her thighs and whined again as she grabbed it and found a wet spot on it.
“Great I had a wet dream and ruined my pillow.”
She threw it across the room when a knock came from her door.
“Dear? Are you alright? I thought I heard something strange.”
(Y/N) grimaced as she looked at the clock on her night stand.
“No mom sorry. It was just a bad dream.”
“Oh alright. Well better get up for school then dear. Don’t want to be late.”
“Alright mom,” (Y/N) sat up before her mom spoke up again.
“Oh and honey? Don’t forget your father and I are leaving for the Bible study weekend trip today so we won’t be home when you’re done with school.”
(Y/N) said a quick ok as she moved to get out of bed when it hit her. She gasped and threw her hands to her mouth as she looked toward the pillow.
“Oh fuck, I had a wet dream about Max Jägerman.”
#starkid npmd#npmd#max jagerman#fanfic#x reader#max x reader#a specific story I need#will probably write a second part#grace chasity#x (y/n)
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Bunny
Toxic! Riri Williams x poc FEM reader
Synopsis: After seeing you all buddy buddy with another ex Riri is fuming and takes it upon herself to pay you a visit.
Warning: out of character Riri Williams this is a toxic fic it wasn’t supposed to be but I let my hands guide me and turns out I like drama. Also there are some words that some might not be too fund of when it comes to the spicier scene.
Riri tries her best to control her breathing or calm her heart as it sets on fire from the inside of her chest it's like she can quite literally feel it being pulled out of place and squashed like a bug beneath a church shoe. It suffocates her and you would think that this would make her sad bring tears to her eyes, but it only warms her body as she almost gets the urge to go at you right then and there with every inch of hatred that swells in her bones seeing you with her it's like a candle that tipped and caught a curtain on fire and the more she stands here watching you smile, giggle and fucking he-he and ha-ha the more she wants to wring the neck of the newly reconnected "friendship" of someone who was supposed to be buried way in your pa- "Riri you good?" Riri glances at the person in front of her than her attention is back on you "30 dollars interest for being late on this payment. I sent you the work on time you send me the money on time or I continue to add interest.”
~
Riri has never been so worked up in her life what the hell could you be doing talking to someone who supposedly hurt you so much in the past? Her mind is so stumped she hasn't been able to focus on any of her studies and it's not as if she needs to, but it would calm her mind and soul if she could shit... and if she could do that it would stop her from making the commute to your apartment that's only fifteen minutes away from campus but due to her rage and focus seems to be more like eight. She does not hesitate to bang on your door as if she owns the damn place and you're quick to open your door because you do in fact pay the damn bills. You only blink when you open the door it may be your initial shock or the fact that you were in a very deep sleep and it's barely five in the morning... yeah it's definitely the latter. For a moment Riri wants to smile seeing you all cute in your worn-out tank top titty half out, bonnet slightly lopsided on your head and your lash stuck to your eyebrow but then she remembers seeing you all hugged up with miss whatever the fuck her name is and she's hot all over again. "No whatever it is come back tomorrow or a week from now I know you know it’s five in the morning I got class in a few hours I haven���t even gotten up to ru-“
“Is she better?” “Excuse me?” You’re rubbing your eyes now and fixing your clothes “who?” “The bi- ole girl I see you running around and laughing with recently” you’re racking your brain for a moment but then you realize Riri ain’t got no say who you hang with who you fuck who you kiss or who you’re bent over backwards for, so you suck in a sharp breath and force your next words through your teeth.
"I'm not yours" your words are hushed but there is no lack of confidence while speaking so she hears you just fine "oh" it's as if Riri has just been put back in her place easily too there's no yelling, cursing or fighting just simple to the heart words. Somehow your voice seems to be more confident than your true feelings because you can't help but question your own words "am I?" Riri bites her tongue as she looks at you now somehow without either of your knowledge you both seem to be getting closer in the moment and of course this is a dangerous game. You both broke up for a reason so why do you still have these feelings? Why do you still pine for each other? Why in heaven and hell do you want to kiss her right now?
Why are you allowing her to kiss down your neck? She approached you with all sorts of hostility but somehow, you're not saying anything about the current situation you find yourself in. No, you're tilting your head back and panting as if she's had you running on a leash without any sort of water Riri closes the door and she's somehow pushed you up against it in a gentle manner which is confusing because the tone she took with you only minutes ago was anything but gentle anything but soft and caring. It is insane how it differs from her actions. It truly is insane that she's leaving soft kisses down your chest now and you're allowing her to rid you of your clothes; first the pajama pants that were already oversized and barely hanging on your hips are gone then the tank top which seems to be proving a bit more difficult getting caught in your hair and snatching your lash off your face but eventually it's gone too.
Finally, there's no obstacle between you both no thick layer of clothing keeping either of you at bay she can touch you the way she wants.
Now that you're exposed to the cold air of your apartment her kisses have you feeling feverish every lick, nip and bite leaves behind a warmth cozy feeling which shoots down to your feet and back to your chest. Riri already has her confirmation but now she has a point to prove she has to prove that no one not a damned soul can make you laugh, giggle, or feel ascomfortable as she does.
Jealousy truly can be a beautiful thing sometime.
Riri works her way down your body she makes it her unspoken mission to kiss every inch of you she wants to touch your soul with her hands and lips. You're in such a frenzy you haven't noticed just how long she's been doing this she's gone from your neck traveled down your chest gave your nipples a gentle suck tongued her way down your abdomen kissed in-between your thighs and hugged them as she allowed the tip of her nose to gently tap what she won't rush to get to. Then she’s down your legs all around giving them the attention they deserve. The woman goes to your feet she is persistent on showing all of your body that you belong to her only her and no one else and she is doing a damn good job. Something so simple so soft so comforting should have no effect whatsoever on the rest of your body, right? Right? Wrong you can't help but spread your legs just the smallest bit as Riri runs her hands up them she's not willing to apologize for being an ass for coming to your home unannounced for playing with your feelings but she's willing to beg for you on her face. "Baby" Her saying that damn word has you wanting to do anything to shut her up, so you incase her between your legs and she's humming in contentment before she even begins to taste you.
You're holding onto the door handle for either your stability or your sanity as Riri glides her tongue across your slit teasing you but you're too impatient for her to be playing these types of games. "Ri" you breath out a warning makes her want to laugh how only a day ago you two were not on talking terms but now she's quite literally on her knees in front of you gripping your thigh like her life depends on it as she tongue fucks you trying to rip any sort of sound from your lips. Your moans and gasps just aren't enough. She stands in front of you again kissing you so passionately, needily. So hungrily and it stays that way as you wrap your leg around her, she's slow taking the silent offer upon chance as she trails her hand up your thigh and around the curve of your ass cupping it tightly bringing you close as if you weren't already a simple step away. She slips two fingers inside of you and you let a soft mewl escape your slightly parted lips humming in satisfaction she begins to gently caress your walls with just those two fingers
You want to cry as you hear a phone ring because please don’t let this stop not right now not yet. Riri pulls her hand away unbothered by its wetness as she answers the phone you whine in dissatisfaction but she gives your wet cunt a gentle tap ushering you to shush and be patient. As she takes the call her free hand continues caressing your thigh “baby it’s five in the morning what’s wrong?” Even though her hands are on you right now you can’t help but feel a sting in your chest as she speaks to “this” unknown caller “okay how about I bring you some breakfast and we watch movies til our first class? That sound good?” You want to be sad upset even but her hands sliding from around your thigh to your oh so sensitive clit proves to be a great distraction you can’t help but gasp out a moan. “Okay see you in thirty” she drops her phone on the floor and she’s quick to get up and press a harsh kiss against your lips before you can begin to ask questions or doubt what’s happening. “I gotta go” you look her dead in her eyes and laugh “you gotta go?” She doesn’t let you pull away even though she can see it in your eyes before you try “yes bunny I gotta go I’ll be back tonight what time you want me here?”
“I don’t want you here… shit ion think so..?” Riri sighs “eight? Seven? What you want to eat tacos? You know that food truck-“ you let her talk as you just sit and dwell for a moment on your couch “bunny? She’s baby and I’m bunny?” Riri watches you confusedly before saying “you said you’re not mine I’m simply abiding your wishes that’s what you want right? To not be mine… BUNNY it is.”
A/n: I know I’m trifling but I had fun with this it’s so out of character though but the fun was worth it and I probably won’t make a part 2.
#riri fanfiction#riri my love#riri williams smut#riri williams x black!reader#riri williams black panther#riri williams fanfic#mcu riri williams#riri williams mcu#riri williams imagine#riri williams x reader#riri williams fanart#riri williams#dominique thorne riri williams#riri wiliams x reader#riri williams x black!fem!reader#riri williams x you#riri williams x fem!reader#black panther x reader#black panther wakanda forever#black panther imagine#black panther#black panther fics#letitia wright shuri#shuri x fem!reader#shuri x reader#shuri x f!reader
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-Rambling, cuz apparently, I like to yap when it comes to you.-
I think Islam is a wonderful religion.
In the middle of octubre, I took notice of how the people in Gaza dealt with things, even if they were suffering, they still praised Allah.
And I was like, let me try that for a few months, as an agnostic, in a Christian household. I didn't know that there were 5 prayers, but once I found out, I looked up how to do them correctly.
As a person who has always questioned why everything was created and why I felt no connection to other religions.
Even going to church with my mom and doing my confirmation, I didn't have that much of a connection, if any.
Islam it kinda clicked with me.
My mom found out, and she started to tell me that in Islam, women are oppressed and so on. I told her that I was just praying, listening to the Quran, and following the teachings of the prophet (pbuph).
I also told her that her views on other religions were warped by the media, news, and movies that portray them in a bad light.
She took it as a bitter pill, but she still let me try and continue. When I would be praying and she would enter my room to ask me something, she would just say, "Oh, sorry. I'll tell you when you're down."
When I did Ramadan, getting up early to find something to eat , wait till it's time to pray then go back to bed.
Even tho she didn't understand the religion and still had her apprehensions, she would come to my room and ask me if I ate or needed to eat before I had to pray.
When I would listen to the Quran or a dua, it made me have a sense of peace of mind.
Having a hard time, I would yap and yap, knowing that even if I think I am alone, Allah is always listening.
I even asked if I was following the right path, and that very thing had a dream. I was walking in the woods and made to a mosque, grabbed a light color stone and sat at a corner, and prayed.
By the time I was done, the stone was darker, and my mom was at the door saying she come to pick me up.
It was a weird dream, but I took it as a sign to keep going, so I did. I learned some Duas, and I would get excited when I would get it right.
I would learn how to pray with those prayer videos, even now I still can't remember all of it, but I can still say them.
I did Islam for 9 to 10 months, and I learned to be more patient, helpful, and to have a clearer mind.
I even taught my mom how to say As-Salaam-Alaikum and Wa-Alaikum-Salaam. When we would go buy groceries, we could have a Muslim cashier, and she would get so happy when I would greet her.
Now the employees know me for my skateboard, and the Muslim would know me for always greeting them.
If they saw me walking by and I didn't notice them, they would greet me like I was an old friend.
Eve tho I am not in Islam as much I still make Duas once in a while, and talk to Allah when I feel like everything is too much. I try to follow the teachings as well.
My mom, even once in a while, would say, " Allah couldn't like that." Or " Ask Allah to help me."
So, seeing how you incorporate Islam into your time travel ua it makes me a little happy.
I can learn something new and enjoy a good story at the same time. I am back to being agnostic, but Islam holds a place in my heart along with the people I meet when I decide to give the religion a try.
Yeah, yapped a lot in this 🤦🏽♀️ but I feel glad I shared my thoughts on your wonderful religion.
This is so cute- i teared up at your dream, too wholesome. And your mom is sweet and supportive, 10/10 mother <33 And i (as do most muslims, im sure) RELATE to talking to Allah like He's our bestie/therapist because it really does feel so therapeutic. Even if Allah already knows whats in your heart, it feels good to talk to Him. Or sometimes, when you're just so heartbroken, so devastated that u cant even bring the words out and you just... cry. Oh- it feels so good to cry out to Allah , the Almighty, the Ar-Rahman, the Ar-Raheem- and you sort of do feel the pain going away after your mini breakdown sesh (actually had a minor one two days ago and after i was done, i was like "welp, that problem isnt that big of a deal. Allah will take care of it for me.") and that is the mindset that keeps me sane these days-
"Allah will take care of everything."
I think its great that you tried out something new, did your own research on it, and like yes- you should definitely explore other religions to find answers to your own questions.
And yes! I do enjoy learning new things through stories too! Thats why i find history so interesting, because im playing a whole ass 10 season show in my head with all the dramatics. It even helped me with biology and medschool too! Like take the hormonal-feedback mechanism. I'd go like- "and then the brain would send signals to release hormones from this organ to tackle with that problem, but once that problem is dealt with- the organ goes- nah bro. that's ENOUGH! STOP! FUCKING STOP!" or "in autoimmune disease, body's own defender cells would suddenly lose their memory and think EVERYONE is their sworn enemy, and *dramatic war music* attack from every direction, not realising they've killed their own, the very people they were born to protect *sad war music* War is ugly-"
i knew some people would not like me incorporating islam into this au, but like- 1. its something different, and i wanted to try it out. 2. i am the only target audience i care about. i write what i want to read. 3. i mean, so far, the eras i've written about has islam as a big component it, so its obv gonna play a big part in it.
i guess, if some people were to keep an open mind while reading, they'd enjoy it. its not like i can force u to convert from what- an au?? i think people who dont want to read this au is either u really hate islam because of false preconcieved notions or you're afraid that maybe you'll actually like islam and u might be interested in it. i dont think anyone could be that weak willed- to be so easily influenced by just mere words?????? because if u are so easily influenced, then i think u need help.
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There was literally no excuse for the way Simon and Soap were the stupidest fucking people together. And only together. They are skillful soldiers, they always complete their mission. But holy fuck, take them out? Put them on a damn leash. It’s like two dogs trying to look at everything whilst on a walk.
Nothing could prepare Gaz for the way Price genuinely says shit like “whoopsies” “We’re in a bit of a jam, huh?” “Uh oh”. Kinda like if he was talking to a little kid. Gaz didn’t know why he used those kinds of words, here’s this special forces captain whom he thought was stone cold; apparently that only applies on the battlefield.
Alejandro’s mind was completely empty, watching Ghost, Soap and Gaz attempt to learn more Spanish. Soap couldn’t roll his R’s, Gaz sounded American whilst attempting to say a word that had been troubling him. It was Ferrocarril. Railroad. Ghost thought that turning Spanish subtitles on his show would help. It didn’t. “Joder, sois estúpidos de cojones..” (Holy shit, you guys are stupid as fuck..).
If Soap is mad, he won’t hesitate to scream. Yell. Only if it’s in the comfort of his home. Captain Price once came over and thought Soap was being attacked. No. He burned his breakfast. Running into the kitchen, gun in hand, he watches Soap pop more toast into the toaster. “Hope my eggs won’t get cold.” “Fuckin hell, Soap. I thought you were dying.” “No, I burned my toast.” “Fucks sake.”
Ghost genuinely cannot go a week without wreaking havoc. Scaring the shit out of people. He likes scaring the new young soldiers, ones who think they’re all that because they got into the military. That is, until Ghost comes up behind them, a heavy hand on their shoulder. “You ever been on the battlefield?” Said in a voice deeper than he’d normally go, but it was funny as shit to him, watching the soldiers jump and then looking straight into their eyes, watching as they attempt to politely disengage in the conversation.
Alejandro frequently plays video games, hard ones that he gets up on his high horse talking about “How hard can a Videojuego be?” (How hard can a video game be?” …Until he is red with rage, veins popping out of his forehead, hands shaking and squeezing the controller so tight that Rudy thought it was going to break. “No es tan grave, Alejandro ..” (It’s not that serious, Alejandro..” he says, getting more and more quiet as he spoke. Alejandro looked back at him, throwing the controller into the wall (denting it.) “You try then, Pendejo.” He says in a dark, creepy ass voice.
The teams genuine reaction when Gaz pulls out a book on the helicopter and starts reading is fucking insane. “Reading?” Ghost comments, wide eyed and sounding astonished. “I mean, the flight will be long. Might as well” He says, shrugging. “You’ve gotta be kiddin’, Gaz.” Soap scans Gaz’s eyes, looking for any humor in them. None. He was completely serious?? “Well, nothin wrong with a bit of reading, yeah boys?” Captain Price reads the room—“..You guys seriously don’t read? Ever?” “Why the fuck would we read-“ they both chirp in unison.
Captain Price is either over dressed or under dressed for the occasion. Why are you wearing a suit at Christmas dinner…And why are you wearing shorts and a Metallica shirt to church…Sometimes Gaz helps him dress so that he won’t look out of place. Has to take him out shopping since he’s rarely in normal clothes, I mean he’s got his gear and a civilian outfit (STRICTLY a civilian outfit.), maybe four shirts, a few pairs of shorts, three pairs of jeans, and a pair of sweatpants. Which wasn’t exactly bad, but for church that just will not do, Captain!!!
Soap has no social anxiety. He’s loud when he laughs, talking with random men at the bar, telling his story to some guy named Daniel who he just met 13 minutes ago. Which for the record, Daniel thinks Soap is fucking awesome. Holy shit dude, you’re a special op? Yeah that’s not something you see everyday. Him and Daniel now meet at the bar a few times per week when Soap is given the green light to do so.
#call of duty#cod modern warfare#modern warfare#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#johnny soap mactavish#simon ghost riley#alejandro vargas#headcanon#sfw little post
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