#so what if I’m only doing part time school
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kinda sorry - firefighter!rafe
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summary: After months of a cat & mouse game Rafe finally gets his favorite waitress alone. He doesn’t even care if it’s at his place of work.
warning: 18+, firefighter!rafe x waitress!reader, fem reader, SMUT! these people are freaks!! dirty talk, oral, cum play & eating (I’m so sorry?), praise kink, fingering, cursing, p in v
an: hiiiii this is so smutty I actually need to repent my sins. I promise I’m working on the next part of cherry wine I just cannot figure out how to end it so in the mean time enjoy another firefighter rafe fic. Does it kinda suck ? yeah.
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You wiped the same spot on the counter for the fifth time as you looked at the clock on the wall behind you. It was already fifteen past seven and they weren’t here yet. You were starting to get antsy. They always showed up at seven like clock work and you hadn’t seen them leave for a call. No flashing lights and loud sirens had been heard or seen.
God you felt pathetic. When did your life come this?
Pining over a hot firefighter who worked across the street and probably only acknowledges your existence for free slices of pie and haphazard flirting. He was so handsome you’d let him flirt with you for free pie any time. You really did feel pathetic, but it had been a long time since a very attractive man made your palms sweat and stomach flutter. Even if there was a chance it was all just out of boredom on his end.
When that hope in your chest that they’d come began to diminish you looked up one more time, just in case. That’s when you spotted the group men walking out of the fire station across the street. A smile involuntarily appeared on your lips. Your favorite part of the week finally arrived.
You’ve been working at Penny’s since high school so you were familiar with the little routine the men across the street carried on. You had grown up with most of the guys having known them since you were a teenager. A couple of them now even being your old classmates. Except for him.
Rafe had started a few months ago and you hadn’t stopped thinking about him since his first visit to Penny’s. It was rare to see a handsome face like his in this small town. It was rare to see a new face period.
You spotted him right away. He could surprisingly pull off the buzzcut and mustaches always did something for you. He was tall with big arms, how could anyone not like him.
From behind the register you watch through the windows as he laughed at something one of the other guys said rubbing his hand over his mustache. A habit you noticed he had. God did he look as handsome as ever. You wanted to know what his mustache felt like against the skin of your neck and against your inner thighs.
The bell above the door rang as the group of men walked into the small diner. You pretended to be busy by wiping the spot next to the one that you had spent the last fifteen minutes on. Doing your best to seem nonchalant like you hadn’t been anticipating their arrival all day by staring out the windows. You would never do something like that.
You looked up and smiled at the familiar faces welcoming them in. They greeted you as they walked to their usual booth in the corner.
Rafe was the last to walk in giving you a smirk and a small nod as he passed. His navy blue tee shirt fit tightly over his chest and biceps. Always a sight for sore eyes. You were practically drooling, you wanted to bite him. Wanted to feel his big hands all over your skin.
You cleared your throat and took a deep breath feeling your cheeks get hot. You needed to push those thoughts away or you’d do something embarrassing. Brushing your hands on your apron you approached them, pulling out your favorite pen and sticker covered order book.
You may or may not have put a little more effort into your appearance today. For no particular reason of course, but if he was going to flirt with you then you might as well play into it. At least that’s what you told yourself when you applied lashes and added some blush to your cheeks.
“Hey guys, what can I get you all to drink?” You asked once standing in front of the table as if they didn’t order the same thing every time.
“I’ll take a coffee my dear,” Captain Morales said smiling. He’s known you for years now and looked out for you as if you were his own daughter.
Rafe was last to order. That smirk making it’s way to his lips again, “I’ll take a coffee y/n,” His eyes lingered on your glossy lips. Little did you know that he was thinking about how he could just eat you up.
As his eyes raked over you face he didn’t miss the red tinge in your cheeks. He’d do anything to make it an even deeper red. Specifically have you blushing profusely under him or even on top of him. Then he started to think about you bent over and ready for him.
“Coming right up!” You said sweetly before heading off to get the coffees breaking whatever trance he was in.
-
Wednesday’s had become Rafe’s favorite day of the week. Not only was it technically his friday but he got to see his favorite girl. He always thinks about the first time he saw you. You were arguing with a customer who thought their expired coupon should still be valid. He watched as the guy threw his soda at you and before him or any one else could step in you punched the guy in the nose and dragged him out by his collar. The idiot cradling his nose bleeding nose.
That has been the hottest thing Rafe had ever witnessed.
“Now it’s free! Never come back dick head!” You yelled at him as you stomped back into the diner. After spending a few minutes in the back changing into a tee shirt you had in your locker you went to their table. Your tough demeanor had vanished and you held a soft smile on your face. That’s when he knew he was fucked.
-
Y/n walked back behind the counter to grab mugs and the coffee pot. You knew you’d probably have to make another fresh pot after serving them. Your best friend, Grace, had returned from her break and was wiping menus staring at the table of men.
“Matt looks so good. If we don’t get laid by these hot men we need to quit and become nuns,” Grace said quietly as she eyed the firefighter she’s had her eye on since he moved to town a few years ago.
Y/n snorted, “I’ve given up on mine. It’s been months and it’s just flirting and checking me out,” she shrugged, “Our hook ups and incredibly romantic dates will remain in my fantasies.”
“Don’t say that when I’ve been waiting a year now for mr brown eyes,” Grace huffed, “Why doesn’t he do anything. He acts like I’d say no to him.”
“You could ask him out,” You said handing her three mugs to help you take everything. Mostly so she could get closer to Matt.
She laughed dramatically, “You’re so funny Y/n! And after that I’ll call my dad since we’re saying things that are never going to happen.”
“Oh come on he could never say no to you,” You encouraged.
“Then you ask blondie out.”
You stared blankly at her.
She snorted, “That’s what I thought. Lets just continue to admire from afar so the hottest men we’ve ever seen don’t reject us.”
You followed behind her with a sigh. It’s not like you hadn’t thought about asking Rafe to hang out. It’s just that you had that nagging feeling in your chest that maybe he didn’t want to see you anywhere outside the diner. You cleared your throat to rid the anxiety that began to bubble in your stomach. You didn’t have time to over think that right now.
Grace placed one of the cups in front of Matt and he looked up at her with a shy smile, thanking her softly. They were two idiots in love.
“Are we ready to order?” You asked after filling the last mug.
“Yes ma’am,” Stanford said. One of the other older fire fighters.
It was always hard paying attention to their orders when Rafe’s ocean eyes were boring into you. He always had that affect of turning you into complete mush.
“For you Rafe?” You asked tilting your head to the side slightly.
A teasing smile pulled at his mouth, “Bacon cheeseburger with fries please.”
“No onions?”
He nodded. His pants getting a bit tight at the thought of you remembering something about him.
“You got it, I’ll put this is for you boys.” You smiled an walked away. A little extra sway to your hips hoping Rafe was watching but hoping you weren’t making a fool of yourself.
-
A slap to the back of his head got Rafe out of his trance. He ducked rubbing his head turning towards the culprit. His wonderful view of your ass ruined.
“Ow?” He muttered looking over at Miguel next to him.
“Are you just going to check her out every fucking week or are you going to do something?” He asked with a teasing tone.
Rafe ran a hand through his hair, “I don’t have time for a girl right now.”
“You’re such a fuckin liar,” Morales laughed as he sipped his black coffee.
Rafe rubbed his face, “I’m working on it okay.”
Morales smirked knowing he was getting under his skin, “You and baby face over here need to grow a pair or someone else is gonna realize how wonderful those women are and beat you to it.”
“Hey what do I have to do with this,” Matt muttered rubbing his mustache.
Miguel laughed, “Dude Grace has been pining for you for forever and don’t act like you don’t feel the same.”
His began blushing at the thought of her, “Whatever. She’s too good for me anyways.”
“Spare me the pity party Anderson and ask the woman out,” Morales said and then pointed at Rafe, “And you. Do something or don’t. Don’t string her along with whatever flirting shit you do.”
Rafe huffed, “Yeah Yeah.”
He turned to look for you tuning out whatever new conversation started between the men. He found you laughing with Grace as you both rolled napkins with silverware. He loved your laugh and your smile. It was so infectious and warm. Rafe had no idea he could feel this way towards someone.
At first it was all lust. Your attractiveness captivated him, especially knowing you didn’t put up with anyone’s shit but also still a complete sweetheart. He moved to this town because he needed a fresh start. He didn’t expect to pine after a woman who was way too good for him.
Rafe continued to watch as you walked around helping other customers. The sway of your hips made him want to grab onto them. Pull you against him as he kissed down your neck from behind. He’d love to hear your laugh as his mustache tickled your ear. He could already see how pink your cheeks would get at the dirty words he’d whisper in your ear if you let him.
You had no idea that you could have him on his hands and knees for you.
-
Captain Morales had paid for their dinner and they had gone back to the station. Of course the meal was filled with Rafe’s longing glances towards you. Some not so subtle flirting on his end, you of course didn’t do it back in front of the other guys. But when they’d al go outside to wait for the captain to pay he would linger as you wiped down their table.
That nights conversation had firmly planted that seed of hope. Hope that he’d finally pull a move on you since there was a fundraiser barbecue at the station this weekend. Obviously you would be there because you would never miss an opportunity to support your community. It had nothing to do with the fact that Rafe was going to be there.
“You’re coming this weekend right? Or do they have you working?” He had asked with a smirk.
You shook your head with a teasing smile, “Not working, don’t worry I’ll be there.”
“Good.”
“Good?” You teased tilting your head a little in a questioning manor.
He nodded, “I’d be bored without my favorite girl.”
You huffed a flustered laugh, “You mean server?”
He shook his head, “I meant what I said.”
-
Rafe watched as you laughed with Mrs.Garcia about something as you helped pass out desserts. It had been almost three hours since the fundraiser started and he had gotten to talk to you only a handful of times.
He was put on grill duty and you had been pulled in all directions by people. Rafe liked the small town atmosphere of the place and it was one of the reasons why he was glad he got hired at that station, but now he was starting to hate it. Why did everyone have to know you and take you away from him.
You were just as disappointed as him. Every time you would try and make your way to the grill someone would pull you to help with something or the kids would want you to watch their dance routine they made up. You could feel his eyes on you and when you looked back at him he’d smirk. That stupid devilish handsome smirk.
The sun had begun to set and people were starting to clear out. You looked around and found Rafe helping take down all of the tables and put away chairs. Being ordered around by Captain Morales. You sighed, maybe you and Rafe were always meant to just have flirty banter. Nothing more.
You didn’t want to wait around until he was free again and you didn’t want to bother him so you accepted your fate. Before you left you wanted to use the restroom so you made your way into the firehouse.
Once Rafe was done helping clean up he looked around for you. He didn’t see you anywhere. His chest filled with disappointment as to how the night went. He thought this would be his chance to talk to you outside your job and maybe even take you home. His disappointment was clear on his face as he continued to look around as if you’d come out of thin air any moment.
Beside him someone cleared their throat, “She went inside a couple minutes ago,” Captain Morales said.
Rafe looked over at him with furrowed brows, “huh?”
“Your girl. She’s inside. Now hurry before you miss your chance,” He nodded towards the open door.
Rafe laughed, “How do you even-“
“Son you two look at each other like you both hung the moon I’d be an idiot to not know. Now please go get her I don’t want to have to deal with your attitude later if you miss your chance.”
Rafe nodded his head with a wide smile, “Yes sir.”
He made his way into the firehouse to look for you. Hopefully you hadn’t slipped by him. As he turned the corner to where the restrooms were he found you standing looking at some pictures hanging on the wall.
He stood there for a minute just admiring you. Your soft cheeks and long lashes. Your long smooth legs in that sundress that looked a bit too short and tight on you. It made something in his stomach stir. He cleared his throat to gain your attention.
Your head snapped towards him. Eyes widening in surprise, you weren’t expecting him. Rafe walked over to stand by you and see what you were staring at. It was a picture of the whole station. Then a picture of him and a couple other guys.
“Staring at me huh?” He asked with a smirk.
You rolled your eyes playfully, “You wish Cameron.”
“I do.” He turned to look at you. That dreamy look in his eyes, “You almost got away from me today.”
You laughed softly, “Sorry. I was trying to come up to you but you know how it is.”
He nodded, “That’s the unfortunate thing about liking a girl everyone loves. You couldn’t help the hear that creeped up your neck at his confession.
He didn’t let you say anything as he continued, “Guess that just means I’ll need to take you out on a date to get you alone.”
You let out a surprised huff, “Oh yeah? Well we’re alone right now.” You looked around making a show of it.
He smirked, “So you don’t want to go on a date with me baby?”
This man was going to be the death of you, “Of course I do. Been waiting for you to ask.”
He laughed and took a step closer to you, “Sorry it’s taken me so long. I liked that little dance we were doing, but let me make it up to you.”
Your body was on fire at everything he was saying. This man had to have been created in a lab with the way he was speaking to you. He was walking closer to you now and you took a few steps back until your back hit the wall of the hallway.
“How are you gonna do that hm?” You tried to play cool as if your pulse wasn’t racing in anticipation. Now you weren’t usually a girl that hooked up with a guy before going on a date but that was going all out the window today if Rafe wanted to have his way with you.
He reached forward and stroked your cheek with his thumb. His eyes going down to your lips. His tongue poking out to wet his bottom lip as your parted, “By fucking you.”
Your eyes widened slightly. Thighs clenching at his non filtered confession, he really was done playing the cat and mouse game. You didn’t even care. Your brain became complete mush and you would let him fuck you in this hallway right now if he wanted to.
“You gonna let me do that hm?” He asked as if he didn’t already know the answer by the way your thighs clenched and your nipples hardened underneath your dress.
You nodded slowly as if you were under a spell. Your heart was erratic as you pictured this tall handsome man fucking you in his big arms. You could cum just thinking about it.
His thumb tugged gently as your bottom lip, “Words baby come on.”
“Yes please,” You said softly.
That’s all he needed to hear before he took your hand and dragged you into the room next to you. It was one of the rooms where they came to sleep during over night shifts. It had a desk, bunk beds, and one single bed. He locked the door behind him before pushing you up against the desk. Rafe and you were panting and you hadn’t even touched each other yet.
He cupped your face in his hands and groaned, “You’re so beautiful I can’t keep my hands to myself anymore.”
“Then don’t,” You murmured in a haze as he dove in to capture your lips in his.
He groaned and moved his hands down to your waist and then to your hips. Pulling you even closer to him as you parted your mouth to let him have more access. He was everywhere and it felt so good. His tongue explored your mouth as his hands grabbed and squeezed at your body. The light whimpers and moans leaving your mouth sending him into a frenzy.
He pulled away with hazy eyes and swollen lips, “Fuck I’ve been thinking about this for long.”
You nodded your head rapidly, “Me too.” You said breathlessly. You felt like you were in a Rafe enduced trance. He moaned at the sight of your swollen lips and the strap of your dress had fallen in the haste.
He pushed you back so you were sitting on the desk now with him between your parted legs. He leaned forward and began pressing open mouthed kisses to your neck. You tilted your head back giving him more room. Your fingers tangled in his hair. Tugging when he kissed that one particular spot below your ear. He bit at your neck and you gasped as his tongue soothed the sting. You had never been so turned on in your life, and he hadn’t even touched you really.
That changed when his hands slid down your hips to your thighs. He squeezed them loving the feel of them. Rafe couldn’t wait to have them wrapped around his head, he wanted you to suffocate him. He needed you to suffocate him with your pussy.
He played with the hem of your dress as he kissed your collarbone. He was being a tease, “I thought the teasing was over.” You mumbled with hooded eyes. You wanted him to just shove the dress up and fuck you.
He chuckled against the swell of your breast that he had been peppering with kisses, “Patience sweetheart. I’ll fill you up with my cock, tongue, and fingers in no time.”
You moaned at his words as he slipped the straps of your dress down and tugged the top part down to reveal your tits. He groaned at the sight of your perked nipples and leaned down taking one in his mouth. His other hand reaching for the other and brushing his thumb over the sensitive bud.
The moans that left your mouth were pornographic. It was like you had been touched in years which was only partly true.
“Mmm you’re so sweet,” He groaned as he moved to the other one.
You sighed with pleasure, “I need you.”
He laughed softly going back to kiss you, “Don’t worry baby I’ll give you what you need.”
His big hands grabbed your hips and pulled you off the desk in a swift motion. You thought he was going to take you to the bed and finally have his way. You should have known better with him, you’re starting to get that Rafe loves the anticipation. The chase of it all because he turned you around so his chest was on your back.
You could feel him aching agains your lower back. He felt so big and your mouth watered at the thought. You barely had any time to question what he was doing when you felt him press kisses from in between your shoulders and down your back. As he did he gently pushed you down to be basically bent over the desk. Then he was kneeling behind you.
His hands stroking your thighs as they shook in anticipation. He playfully bit your butt with a small groan. Rafe pushed your dress up to rest around your waist. Almost on instinct you arched your back and pushed your hips towards him. Needing for him to do something.
“Please Rafe,” You murmured desperately.
He grinned sweetly, “You sound so pretty asking nicely baby.” He reached his hand down to lightly stroke you over your underwear.
You gasped at the minimal contact. Then he was fully rubbing circles onto your clit. The wet patch at your center growing. He pulled your cheeks apart as he dove in and pressed wet kisses to your clothes pussy.
“Fuck,” He groaned, “Let me have a taste yeah?”
You whined. Literally whined, “Please Rafey please please.” You never thought you could be this desperate for a man. You could feel his smirk against your cunt.
He slid your panties to the side and dove in like a starved man. You gasped in surprised not expecting him to go all in since he had been teasing so much, but you’d thank God every day for it. You already knew you’d be thinking about his mouth for the rest of your life.
Rafe’s tongue massaged your clit in the best way and with the position his nose nudged at your entrance. His hands reached up to grab a handful of your ass and squeeze making you moan louder.
The room was filled with the sounds of his sucking and lapping as well as your whines. His hand then came down to slap one cheek. A motion that made you push yourself against his mouth even more.
Rafe would be a happy man if this is the way he went out. Drowning in your pussy. Your juices dripping down his chin as he mercilessly worked his tongue over you. The groans he let out adding to the pleasure.
Pressure built up in your lower stomach as that knot of pleasure tightened. You had never gotten so close so fast besides with your own hand. The way this man was lapping you up had your legs shaking.
“Yes Rafe!” You exclaimed, “Gonna cum!”
Your head flew back as your eyes shut in pleasure. The white hot euphoric feeling of your orgasm taking over.
“Mhmmm,” He groaned as he continued to lick and suck, “Fuck baby so good.” He mumbled as he continued his ministrations prolonging the intense feeling.
He pulled away once he had cleaned you up of everything you gave him, “Such a messy girl huh,” He mumbled as he pulled your hair so your back was against his chest again. Your head tilted back onto his shoulder. Rafe had a way with words, it had your mind in a haze.
He moved his hand to cup your face and tilt it towards him even more so he could capture your lips in his. The kiss was sloppy and so hot.
You pulled away slightly and mumbled against his lips, “Please please fuck me Rafey.”
He but his lip and groaned, “Of course baby anything you want.”
You expected him to shove his pants down and stuff his cock in you but you should have known him better. He spun you around so your back was pressed to the desk again. He tapped on the back of your thighs to get you to sit on it again and as you did he mumbled, “So obedient.”
The scene in front of him looked so vulgar. You were sat at the desk with your dress bunched around your stomach. All the delicious parts Rafe wanted to dive into exposed. He took a mental picture to remember it even though this definitely wouldn’t be the last time he’d have his way with you.
You reach out for him and tugged at his shirt wanting it off. He smirked as he took the hint and pulled it off. The sight of his toned chest and broad arms had you gushing all over again.
“We should be quick now before they come looking,” He muttered as he began to undo his belt. He pulled his pants and boxers down to rest around his ankles. His cock on full display for you and you bit your lip as you took in the sight. Glassy eyes widening at the size, you had never seen one like that.
He tugged at it a few times to relieve the tension. The way you were looking at him was making his ego grow, and Rafe didn’t really need that.
Grabbing where your knees crease he pushed your legs up so your feet were almost flat on the desk. Your core glistening and on display for him.
“Fuck I can’t wait to be in that nice wet pussy,” He couldn’t away. He let you hold yourself up now as he grabbed himself and began sliding his tip through your folds. You let out small whimpers at the feeling. Then rubbed it over your clit, making you even wetter.
Rafe was having the time of his life. You felt so good against him he never wanted to stop. The way your nipples perked and your eyes practically watered in pleasure.
“You’re so wet baby,” He slipped the tip into your entrance, “mmmph feel s’good huh.” He smirked cockily as he pushed himself in deeper and deeper.
Your brows furrowed in pleasure as he stretched you deliciously. His thumb finding your clit and rubbing soft circles. Your head fell back with a sigh as he bottomed out.
He leaned forwards and kissed you softly as he started moving. You both moaned as he pushed back in hitting that sweet spot. He pulled away and leaned down to take a nipple in his mouth. Sucking and gently tugging.
Your hands were tangled un his short locks. As his movements grew faster and harder your hands moved all over. His shoulders, chest, back anywhere you could touch. Your nails leaving crescents in his skin as he continued to mumble obscenities into your ear.
‘so good baby’ ‘the most perfect pussy’ ‘my good girl letting me fuck her so well’
The feeling of euphoria increasing as he continued. Rafe groaned as he felt you tighten around him. He was regretting one thing right now and that was waiting this long to fuck you.
“M’close Rafe,” You whined as that familiar feeling spread throughout your body.
“I know,” He panted and started working faster, “Cum for me baby come on. I know you can do it.”
His encouragement helped your release. As he felt you orgasm and tighten around him he neared the edge of his own orgasm.
“Need you to cum in me,” You mumbled as he milked you for all you had.
His eyes rolled back at your statement, “Fuuuck.” Then his hips snapped into you a few more times before he released inside you coating your walls in his cum. It felt so good to have him stuffed inside you. His head resting on your chest as he groaned. After a few minutes of your labored breaths Rafe slowly pulled out. The loss of him causing you to whimper and he just smirked.
You thought you guys were done but then Rafe looked down and slipped two fingers inside you.
“Oh Rafe,” You gasped, “W-what are you doing?”
He bit his lip as he continued to watch his fingers pump in and out slowly, “Feeling how well you took all my cum baby.”
Then as if he couldn’t be hotter and dirtier he removed his fingers and his cum was all over them. He took them and began rubbing it over your clit. The overstimulation made your toes curl and your mouth fall open.
The scene in front of him was so filthy and will be on constant reply for the rest of his life. The entire last hour he would be thinking about that forever.
He removed his fingers and you reached out grabbing his wrist to tug the fingers into your mouth. Licking and sucking his fingers clean.
“Dirty girl,” He mumbled as you pulled them out with a pop.
He leaned in and kissed you softly, no more lust behind it. It was something else now. Rafe helped you fix your dress and pull your underwear back on after he pulled his pants back up.
“I’m kind of sorry I didn’t take you out first but I also don’t regret it because I’ve been wanting to get my hands on you for months,” Rafe said as you fixed your ruffled hair.
You smiled at him, “I’m not at all. You can still take me out and we can do that all over again.”
A loud banging on the door made you jump and rafe whip his head around.
“You guys done yet? I need a nap,” one of the other guys yelled through the door.
Your face paled at the realization that you might now have been very quiet. Rafe just laughed, “One minute!”
“Oh god. I need to quit my job and move towns now,” You put your hands on your face in embarrassment.
Rafe laughed and kissed the back of your hands that covered your face, “Nuh uh. Not running from me now.”
#rafe cameron#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron au#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron fic#rafe smut
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엔하이픈 --- EMAILS I NEVER MEANT TO SEND (PART 1)
박성훈 x fem!reader x 심재윤 ┊ a very late and long birthday gift for jennifer!! :> ┊ wc 3.9k
GENERE ┊ !oneshot, !nonidol , !fluff , !hints of angst , !high school, !childhood best friends to lovers , !best friend's brother , !love triangle , !hockey player sunghoon , !basketball player jake , !academic weapon reader
DISCLAIMER ┊ depictions may be inaccurate , contains swear words, y/n is lee heeseung's sister , sunghoon calls y/n 'princess' , y/n calls jake 'jaeyun' , mentions of ocs and random characters here and there.
⟡ 📩 𑁋 TAGGING : @a-dream-bookmark , @/k-labels , @k-nets , @k-films
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Sunghoon,
I’m sorry. I’m sorry if this will clog up your inbox, but I heard from Jay that you don’t really use this email address anymore. So I’m going to send everything here.
Sent 22:45 PM. 1st August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Sunghoon,
Today is our last first day of school. Ever. It’s insane, isn’t it? I’ve known you ever since we started school, which was 12 years ago. Absurd, is it not?
I remember vividly how we met. Or, more correctly, how our friendship started.
It was a cold December evening. I remembered walking home from the convenience store, carrying a plastic bag of ice creams and popsicles. I thought about how foolish I looked—a small and petite seven-year-old kid buying ice cream in the thick of winter���but how could I resist? My older brother, Heeseung, lost a bet against me and he said he’d buy me anything I wanted from the convenience store.
And, of course, as a seven year-old, I chose to buy ice cream.
Anyway, as I was waddling home, I saw you. Sitting outside of what I didn’t know back then was your house. Your face was wet with tears, the tip of your ears red from the cold. I remember specifically the moment—I cheerfully said ‘hi’, pouted when you didn’t answer and simply stared deep into my eyes. I then handed you an ice cream—the one with lime jelly inside, my favourite one—to help brighten the grim look upon your face.
And, of course, I remember so vividly, the smile that lit up your cute face.
I didn’t even ask what went wrong. I don’t know why—maybe it was the instincts of a kindergartener. It’s as if the universe was telling me that the only thing you yearned for at that moment was something to simply rejoice your mood.
For the first time, Sunghoon, I felt warm on a winter day.
Sent 23:09 PM. 9th August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Hoon,
I think Beomgyu likes me. This is weird.
He’s the same age as Heeseung oppa. Isn’t that already weird? (I know my age difference with Heeseung is only two years)
I’ve practically grown up with Beomgyu—dinners on Thursday nights with him is now something my family does every week. I see him like family, Sunghoon.
Like my own brother.
He came to pick me up from school today, tagging along with Hee oppa. We rode home with his car, and I couldn’t help but feel that the constant eye contact in the car we made meant something.
We hung out today, like we always do. I’m glad that I have a good relationship with Hee oppa, but I’m a bit sceptical of Beomgyu. He’s a little bit more… nicer in a sense.
It may just be me overthinking things.
Sent 20:54 PM. 13th August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Sunghoon,
Thank you for the chocolate moist cake, by the way! It’s really good—I love your mom’s cooking.
Okay, before you scold me—yes, I’m going to go and get ready! You’re coming at 16:30, so technically I still have around 30 minutes to pick out an outfit—and it’s not like we’re going on a date. We’re going to a cafe to study.
Why am I even thinking of going on a date with you?
Sent 16:07 PM. 14th August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Sunghoon,
Why are you so good-looking?
Oh and I want to thank Jaeyun for playing basketball in class and accidentally throwing the ball at my face—now I get to see you up close.
Since when are you so… handsome, Hoon?
Thanks for saving me. I would’ve hit the floor and cracked my skull if it wasn’t for you.
Sent 17:01 PM. 19th August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Park Sunghoon!
I have a brilliant idea for Halloween!
Yes, I know it’s still very early and we have to focus on upcoming midterms (it’s in like five weeks or something, Hoon) but… I’ve just finished re-watching Kiki’s Delivery Service and we have to absolutely dress up as Kiki and her cat for Halloween.
Who’s who, you’re asking?
I’m Kiki, of course, and you’re the cat. Because you look like one, and it’s cute.
You’re… cute. (Why am I acting like I do not have a crush on you, that is growing bigger and bigger each day?)
Now I just have to find some kind of way to gather up courage and tell you. Actually, I have a question for myself. Am I insane? Why am I scared to suggest something so platonic to my childhood best friend?
Sent 12:00 PM, 31st August.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Sunghoon,
I’m sure you know this by now, but hoco’s in a week. Do you have anyone to go with?
Gosh, I feel so pathetic. I’m sitting in my room, like a complete idiot, typing away emails that convey my feelings. Emails, Hoon, that the person I like will most likely never read.
I mean, I could’ve written letters… or confessed in person… or text you about this. But, yeah, despite holding the title of one of Decelis Academy’s best students for two years straight (I must get valedictorian this year), I’m sending emails to an unused email instead of confessing directly to the person I like.
Funny, ‘cause the person I’m referring to—the person I like, it’s you.
There’s a 99% chance you’ll never read these, since the email address I’m sending this to is your old one, the one you used in middle school—with a silly username that made people think your name is ‘Park Sungho’ instead of ‘Park Sunghoon’.
Again, do you have anyone to go with?
I’m asking, ‘cause if you don’t, I’m here. I’ll go with you.
Actually, scrap that.
I want to go with you.
Sent 9:00 AM, 1st September.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Sunghoon, Mom just asked if I got a date for homecoming. What should I say? I mean, it’s not like I don’t have any potential candidates—Jaeyun’s been hinting to go with me for a while. Poor him, honestly. I keep on ignoring him…
Also, Naeun told me that Huening Kai from 12-2 is planning to ask me if I want to go to homecoming with him tomorrow.
Well, if you’re asking me, I could go with Jaeyun or Kai. It doesn’t really matter—Jaeyun’s really nice, he treats me well. He plays basketball too, and I’m sure he’ll show up with flowers or something (that’s what Danielle, his twin sister, said). Kai seems okay, too, I’ve heard rumours about him being ridiculously handsome if he wants to. I’m not entirely sure what that means.
But, deep inside my heart, I know just perfectly who I want to go with.
You.
Just… you.
Sent 13:43 PM, 1st September.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Hoon!
30 minutes ago, I saw Heeseung come home with purple flowers and a bunch of chocolate. Something clicked inside my head as I knew something was up—something related to my friend, Jennie Danielle Sim, as her favourite colour is purple and she LOVES chocolate.
Okay, anyway, I rushed downstairs to ask him what that was all about.
And guess what? Heeseung’s planning to ask her to homecoming!
I’m kicking my feet in the air as I’m writing this.
Though, you know, I wish I had someone like my brother. I mean, someone who’s going to love me like I’m the only woman in his mind. Like I’m the only one that matters, and that he loves me with his entire existence.
Don’t ask me why I wish for that someone to be you.
It’s weird. It’s bad. I’m not supposed to like my own best friend.
Sent 17:55 PM, 1st September.
˚ ▒ ₊ㅤ Ⳋ᧙ ⁺
“Y/N!”
You turn around, curious to see Jake running towards you from the school gate. You wait for him patiently—and unsurprisingly, he barely took a few seconds to catch up to you.
“Hey,” he greets you tenderly, slightly out of breath. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” you smile. “What’s up?”
“Nothing,” the brunette replies, offering you the goofiest smile you’ve ever seen. “Just wanted to walk with you. Where’s Sunghoon?”
“He’s probably on his way, still,” you answer, glancing at the time on your smartphone.
7:15 AM.
“Sunghoon should arrive soon. He usually comes to school exactly at twenty past seven,” you continue. “I honestly have no idea why. He wants to come to school earlier than half past seven, but not earlier than quarter past seven.”
Jake chuckles at your little rant about Sunghoon. “He’s one attentive person, I guess.”
“Surely,” you nod, mentally slapping yourself for smiling about such a small talk about Sunghoon.
“Come on, let’s walk to class,” Jake says, “we’ll wait for Sunghoon there—do you want any drinks? You know, like coffee or tea. Banana milk, maybe?”
You begin walking with Jake, footsteps in sync, to your homeroom. “Drinks? This early in the morning?”
“You look like you haven’t eaten anything for breakfast,” Jake replies. He grabs your wrist and pulls you towards the cafeteria—straying away from the path to your homeroom. His eyes quickly scan for any snacks or lightweight meals he could buy for you.
“Jae,” you say, purposely using a nickname you never use (and probably will never do again) to grab his attention. “You don’t have to buy me anything, you know.”
Jake, who’s deep in engagement with the cashier, perks up at the nickname. He turns around and gives you a grin, “yeah, I know I don’t have to. I just want to.”
“Here,” he hands you a kimbap and a box of mango yoghurt drink, the silly grin still on his face. That grin you always see Jake offer you. “Eat up.”
“Thanks,” you reply with a smile, marvelling at how delicious the kimbap in your hand looks.
˚ ▒ ₊ㅤ Ⳋ᧙ ⁺
7:35 AM.
“Hoon!” you exclaim, jumping out of your seat so abruptly it startles Jake—who’s reading a comic book next to you. You race towards your best friend at the door. Sunghoon, despite his usual nonchalant demeanour, gives you a small and brief smile.
“Hi,” he utters in his customary tone—deep and quiet. “You’re early.”
“Not really,” you reply with a bubbly smile.
“Have you eaten breakfast?” you ask as the two of you walk to your desks. “You’re 5 minutes late, by the way.”
Sunghoon lets out a chuckle, “I forgot you assume that I can teleport from the school gates right to the front of the class.”
Your cheeks flush warm, “no! I’m just saying… you usually come at half past seven. Like, exactly. Did something happen?”
Sunghoon pulls his chair out of his desk and sits down. Smirking, he comments, “Y/N, are you my girlfriend or something? You sound like it.”
His words make both you and Jake choke on thin air.
I wish, you think to yourself.
“Hoon!” you stammer, “what the hell?”
“Sorry,” he says in between gasps of silent, ‘Sunghoon’-type laughter. “Couldn’t defeat my intrusive thoughts.”
“So,” you begin, changing the topic of the conversation so flawlessly. It’s always been that way—nothing is ever really complicated with Sunghoon. You could talk about ten different topics in under five minutes; and he’d listen to it all. “Have you thought about who you’re bringing to homecoming?”
Homecoming. A topic that makes your stomach turn upside down—knowing that, given the current situation, you’d be going with Jake instead of Sunghoon.
And as expected, the two boys seated around you look up.
“Nope,” Sunghoon’s reply is simple.
“You? The golden hockey player of Decelis, haven’t thought about who to bring to homecoming?” Jake exclaims, with a touch of drama.
Sunghoon chuckles. “It’s just homecoming. I could bring anyone.”
That ‘anyone’ broke your heart just a little bit. If he could bring anyone, that possibly meant he wouldn’t bring you—there are many other girls, much prettier and livelier than you, that he could bring.
“You, Y/N?” Jake asks, “who are you going with?”
“I don’t know,” you reply after some time.
You watch as Sunghoon opens his mouth to speak, yet is fiercely cut off by Jake’s relaxed comment.
“You know, you could always go with me,” he says with a careless smile, leaning back into his chair.
Sunghoon stiffens while you awkwardly smile. This was the first time Jake had directly brought it up—his requests and subtle hints of going to homecoming with you had always been through Danielle. “Actually, I’m probably not going to homecoming.”
“Why?” Jake asks.
“Um…”
To be frank, despite being active in clubs, and being seemingly social, you dislike big social events. Especially the likes of homecoming or prom. There’s something about large crowds that makes you feel slightly out of place, and the fact that you’re surrounded by couples… just makes you a little sappy.
“Y/N doesn’t really like those kinds of events,” replies Sunghoon, his gaze directed to Jake a little too sharp than you’d like.
“Hoon,” you lament, nudging him with your elbow.
“If you’re asking her out,” Sunghoon continues, his nonchalant expression morphing onto his face, “you should know.”
˚ ▒ ₊ㅤ Ⳋ᧙ ⁺
“OI! PRINCESS!” SUNGHOON CALLS FROM BEHIND YOU, OBLIVIOUS OF YOUR WIDENED EYES AND ACCELERATING HEARTBEAT DUE TO THE NICKNAME.
You turn around and stop in your tracks, letting him catch up. “Yeah?”
He adjusts the placement of his varsity jacket—his pride, earned by qualifying into the school’s varsity hockey team—before he speaks. “Are you really not going to homecoming?”
You purse your lips before nodding.
To me, there’s really no use of going to homecoming without you, Hoon, you think to yourself.
“Yeah, no. I’m not. Why?”
Sunghoon shoves his hands into his pockets. “N-nothing, I was just curious.”
Embarrassed, you quickly nod. “Okay.”
“Yeah,” he gives you a smile, ruffling your hair. “Get back home safely. Text me when you’ve arrived home.”
“But you’ll be at practice–”
“It’s okay,” Sunghoon cuts you off, flashing you a soft, reassuring smile. One that makes your heart lap a million miles per hour. “I’ll read it anyway. They can’t get rid of me—I’m Decelis’ best bet at winning this season.”
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Hoon…
What was that? That was weird. Really weird. I don’t like it.
Why did you ask me if I was really not going to hoco? Are you going to ask someone out, and not want them to think we’re friends?
I… you know, what? I’m not going to think about it anymore. I don’t care.
Just… ask out anyone you want to. Even if it’s not me.
Even if it’s me. This possibility doesn’t quite make sense, as I don’t think you do see me the way I… see you. My saviour, the person who knows me best, the person I’ve developed feelings for.
You know what, Hoon?
I’ll go with Jaeyun, if there are no signs of you asking me to go with you. By Wednesday.
Sent 18:01 PM. 2nd September.
˚ ▒ ₊ㅤ Ⳋ᧙ ⁺
“HONESTLY, Y/N, I ADMIRE YOU,” DANIELLE SAYS SUDDENLY, CAUSING YOU TO ALMOST SPIT OUT YOUR LUNCH.
You’re sitting at the usual spot you usually do with your girlfriends—Danielle and Naeun—people-watching as each of you devour your lunches. Danielle sits in front of you while Naeun sits on your left side. Danielle, as usual, has her lunch of various goodies from the convenience store; and Naeun, like you, stick to what the school cafeteria serves.
“What? Why?”
“I admire the way you don’t even care if you have a hoco date,” she continues.
“Oh, God,” you exhale shakily. “Dani, you scared me! And yes, I don’t care. If I don’t have a date, then I don’t have to go.”
Lie.
Kind of.
Actually, a very small part of you wanted to go to homecoming—just for the experience. But again, you’re reminded by the fact that you do not have a date, or at least, the person that you want to go to isn’t your date.
“Why do you not want to go?” Naeun, from your left, asks. She gulps down the last bit of her strawberry milkshake before continuing. “I mean, I know you’re the top student, and you don’t party ‘cause all you do is shove your nose into a book and study. But, Y/N, it’s your last homecoming.”
You dramatically groan, “you girls know why I hate hoco. Looking at all the couples around me makes me wanna barf.”
Naeun and Danielle burst into laughter, clutching their stomachs. Amused, you grin along.
“I can’t relate anymore,” Danielle giggles. “I’ve got–”
Naeun hits Danielle’s head lightly with her fork. “Okay, girl, we get it,” she turns to you, flipping hair off her shoulders. “Y/N, honestly, how does it feel when your best friend’s dating your brother?”
“We’re not dating!” Danielle shrieks. Naeun rolls her eyes.
You laugh, “honestly, it is kind of weird hearing someone talk so… fondly, I might say, of Hee oppa. Frankly, Dani, Hee oppa is not who you think he is.”
“He’s amazing,” gushes Danielle. One look at her face, and an exchanged glance between you and Naeun, was enough to tell that Danielle’s completely smitten.
“For now,” Naeun quickly adds. “Though, if he starts treating you like trash, or making you shed a sad tear, I won’t hesitate to burn his house down.”
“Hey!” you exclaim, despite agreeing with Naeun. Your brother or not, you’d destroy his life if he made your best friend sad. “Where am I going to live if you burn our house down?”
“Sucks to be Heeseung’s sister, huh?” Naeun jests.
“You can live with me,” Danielle adds on to the joke, “Jaeyun’s going to be delighted to have you live with us.”
“Mhm, that reminds me, are you finally going to go to hoco with Jake?” Naeun asks.
“Yeah, are you?” Danielle urges. “I swear, it is so annoying hearing him talk about you. It’s weird—aren’t you guys friends?”
You shove another dumpling into your mouth. “Yeah, we are… hmm, it is weird, now that you say it.”
“Reject him if you don’t want to,” Naeun suggests. “Pity him. He’s been on your tail for like weeks now, trying to get you as his homecoming date.”
“He’s liked you for quite some time,” Danielle says softly. “Well, trust me, it’s weird—but I do want you to decide quickly. If you don’t want to go with him, just say so.”
“I’m not sure what to do,” you say. “I… don’t want to risk losing a friend by rejecting him.”
Honestly, that’s how you feel with Sunghoon, too. Your friendship, strong and unbreakable for more than a decade, was the sole reason you’re afraid to confess your true feelings to him.
On the other hand, however, you feel extremely weirded out by Jake. You started befriending him in early sophomore year, when he was first assigned as your deskmate. You remember him being as bubbly and friendly as he is now, and you’re sure that the two of you became friends because of that.
“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” Danielle pats your shoulder. “I know him best to assure you that he’s not the type to break off a friendship just because his feelings aren’t reciprocated.”
Now, you feel a little less bad to tell Jaeyun (or Jake, to most people) that you’re going to go as his date only if Sunghoon’s not asking you too.
˚ ▒ ₊ㅤ Ⳋ᧙ ⁺
“SO, HOW WAS PRACTICE?” YOU ASK SUNGHOON, SLIGHTLY SMILING AT HOW THE THUNK OF YOUR FOOTSTEPS COINCIDE.
Sunghoon tilts his head for a moment, trying to form his words. He then looks at you before replying, “yeah, it was okay. Nothing really interesting.”
“What about that newbie—what’s his name again?” you ask, recalling about Sunghoon telling you that they were having a few new players.
“Riki? The freshie?”
“Yeah!” you nod, “that one!”
“He’s okay,” replies Sunghoon, “he’s good, actually, for a freshman. I heard he played in middle school, so I guess that’s where the skills come from.”
You nod again, and comfortable silence engulfs the two of you. The crunch of autumn leaves beneath your steps and the gentle breeze creates a fulfilling ambiance.
“What about you?” he asks, after a few moments of silence—of you basking in his presence, enjoying the present of walking home with him. “I can’t imagine how hard it is to balance being our batch’s top scorer and orchestra at the same time.”
You chuckle. It had been hard on a few occasions; for example, if you had an orchestra concert to practise for, and around the same had tests to study for. But, generally, it’s quite simple. “Violin’s just a hobby of mine. I’m glad I have an orchestra club as a way to practise it.”
“Oh, shut up,” Sunghoon rolls his eyes. “Don’t ever come to me and complain about it, then, if it’s ‘just a hobby’.”
You laugh, stealing a glance at Sunghoon. And, as always, it hits you. You dislike, probably just a little bit, how carefree and easy you become when you’re with Sunghoon; how he makes everything feel so simple; how he makes life less tiring, and how he makes you feel that you’re worth befriending.
He’s handsome—his fair complexion looks soft and well taken care of, his nose bridge is sharp, his smile stunning yet delicate.
“We’re here,” Sunghoon says, pushing you out of your train of thought. You stand, with him, in front of your house. The smell of kimchi soup begins to attack your sensory buds. “Oh, that smells good…”
“I think mom’s making dinner already,” you point out. “Do you wanna stay over? I can go and ask.”
Sunghoon shakes his head, smiling lightly. “No, it’s okay. As much as I want to devour every last drop of your mom’s cooking, I have to get home. My mom’s bringing us to visit grandma, so I shouldn’t miss it.”
You mirror his smile. “Okay. Get home safely.”
Sunghoon nods, and after a few steps away, he turns around and waves. He smiles—the usual, soft and gentle grin he always offers you, yet… something just feels different. He lingers around longer than you expect him to, before finally turning on his heel and walking home.
You watch him walk away, and it’s like a scene in melodramatic dramas: he strolls leisurely home, your eyes follow him from behind as golden brown leaves sway down from the trees.
To: [email protected] From: sincerely/[email protected]
Dear Park Sunghoon,
It’s Wednesday now. Um, yeah, I know I shouldn’t be sleeping this late, but I just finished watching 20th Century Girl, and I took, like, 15 minutes to calm myself down from all the tears, hehe.
Are you… going to ask me to go to homecoming with you?
It’s getting more and more hopeless as every minute passes by. In 7 hours, I’m going to go to class and say yes to Jaeyun, you know?
I hate it. I hate how I’m hoping you would stop me from saying yes to Jaeyun. I hate how I’m desperately wishing you’re preparing something to ask me to homecoming.
You know, what? Forget it. I’m going with Jaeyun.
Sent 00:10 AM, 4th September.
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Hi femsolid, since you and @floatingbook are the only two separate French bloggers that I know of. I wanted to ask on how you deal with colored men in particular middle eastern men. I don’t have a car so I often use Uber I’m thinking of switching to G7 I’m not sure if it’s any better. I have noticed that as drivers they are very aggressive and id prefer not to deal with that. I noticed that they tend to show more aggression to regular women (non Muslim women). I use the metro mainly and bc of that I come in contact with men. I haven’t had many negative experiences but I have noticed people getting more antsy on the metro. I’m also thinking of switching to female only membership only private spaces. I use to enjoy walking in public spaces but men keeping using that as an excuse for small talk. They often approach me and are very persistent. I think it’s ridiculous that I can’t be in public spaces. Do you know any good places in Ile de France? I’m happy we don’t have to beat around the bush about the immigration problem because a lot of these women are problematic too. Both genders ask me for money but it’s mainly women that try to use their children as a prop against me. So many of them are so entitled when asking for money too. I’ve noticed with them they never ask Caucasian French people they intentionally go after other minorities. Also what Arrondissements do you avoid? I once ended up in one part of town where I questioned what city I was in. Those neighborhoods tend to be a hit or miss sometimes people are nice sometimes they aren’t. Anyways please make a post on how to live in France as a separatist. I live in Paris so that makes it easier
I don't keep track of where I'll find more people of colour so I can avoid them, I don't sort through men based on their ethnicities, I don't call muslim women "non regular women", I don't view syrian refugees as a nuisance using their kids (who should be in school but are left in the street by the french government) against me, I don't believe there's an "immigration problem", I know there are more white men raping their daughters in France than there are refugees catcalling you.
What gets me the most is not what you're saying, I've heard it all before, it's the way you're saying it. It's the nonchalance, as if there was a tacit and national agreement on the matter. You probably don't think you said anything racist at all. It's probably the way your family speaks at dinner time, or how your favourite presidential candidate speaks, or how whatever "feminist" space you frequent speaks too. You assume I totally get where you're coming from and will obviously agree and give you some tips on how to avoid those nasty arabs.
So I'm going to tell you something, only because I'm feeling very patient today. Racism is a conspiracy theory. And when you're so used to having racist conversations with your racist friends and family that you think you can actually say shit like that in public, be scared. And stop watching racist news channels.
If I were to make a post about being a feminist separatist in France, you'd probably find it very unhelpful, as it wouldn't address any of your bourgeois problems such as refugee kids begging you for coins.
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✦ public displays of trouble affection - percy jackson x reader
summary: a boarding school au, where percy is the most annoying boy you’ve ever met, and becomes the reason you get in trouble for the first time ever. the worst part? hes not even sorry— he’s just laughing the whole time! wc: 1k
you were doing your best to stay focused, really. the museum your class was visiting was quiet apart from the low chatter of your classmates, filled with dimly lit displays of ancient artifacts and paintings that all seemed to blend together after a while. you were leaning closer to read a plaque about some old pottery when you felt the tiniest nudge against your shoulder.
you shot percy a warning look, but he just grinned back at you, all wide-eyed innocence. you turned back to the exhibit, ignoring him, but—seconds later—another nudge.
“percy, seriously, cut it out,” you muttered, keeping your eyes forward. he only grinned wider, pretending not to hear as he nudged you again.
you finally turned to look him in the eye, but then he spoke again.
“that one reminds me of you,” he said, pointing to quite possibly the ugliest painting of a seal you’d ever seen.
you scoffed, nudging him back harder. “oh, you’re real funny.” in hindsight, maybe that was a little mean—he hadn’t even nudged you that hard. but this was percy, the most annoying boy in the history of ever, so you didn’t really care.
he gave you a once-over, that infuriating spark of amusement in his eyes. “oh, is that how it is?” he asked, eyebrow raised, the grin on his lips growing wider.
you crossed your arms, tilting your chin up, daring him to try anything else. “yes, it is.”
“alright, then,” he said, cocking his head to the side, and before you could react, he gave you a tiny push with both hands. it wasn’t a hard push, but you weren’t expecting it, so your arms uncrossed as you caught your balance, furrowing your brows at him.
“percy! what the hell?” you said, but you were already laughing despite yourself.
without even thinking, you shoved him back— way harder.
he barely stumbled though, and you were just about up to push him again when you froze at the sound of your name from behind.
your teacher stood there, a scowl set firmly on her face. “stop this foolish behavior. we are in a public space,” she said, raising her eyebrows. “you’re setting a bad example, while wearing the school uniform. is this really how you want to represent our school?”
whatever was left of your smile faded. of course the moment she turned around was when you pushed him.
“no…” you muttered, heat creeping up your face as you heard percy snickering beside you, trying to disguise his laugh by pretending to look interested in some dinosaur bones.
“you’re usually so responsible,” she continued, looking at you with mild disappointment. “what’s gotten into you?”
you heard percy snort under his breath, and saw him cover his mouth with his hand out of the corner of your eye. you wanted to slap that smirk he was trying to hide off his face.
how come he wasn’t the one in trouble?
“nothing, miss,” you mumbled, shaking your head quickly. “i’m sorry.”
“alright,” she said with a sigh. “don’t let it happen again, otherwise you won’t be able to go on trips again.” it took all your energy to not groan in annoyance right then— but you ended up just nodding.
it was like percy could sense your frustration, and you could just as well sense that stupid grin on his face growing.
she finally turned away, heading off to talk to another group.
the second she was gone, percy practically doubled over, his laughter barely contained. you turned around and glared at him, fists clenched.
you never got in trouble. this wasn’t even fair! sure, you weren’t in real trouble, but you never got shouted at either.
“shut up.” you grumbled, “you’re such a pain, this is all your fault.” you stood there, arms crossed, watching as he bit his lip, still grinning.
“but, you’re usually so responsible!” he mocked your teacher and teased you all in one go, “what’s gotten into you?”
he gave you a quick, teasing once-over.
“it’s hard to be responsible when i have someone as annoying as you around.” you retorted, crossing your arms once again.
“oh, so you’re saying my presence makes you act differently?” he teased, tilting his head to the side. “don’t flatter me, you’re too kind.”
“wha— no!” you scrambled for your words, which is something that usually never happens.
“that is so not what i meant, and you know it!” you exclaimed, and percy just chuckled harder, raising an eyebrow at you like he didn’t believe you, just to annoy you further.
it was working.
you huffed, “you’re so insufferable!” he shook his head with a laugh, looking you up and down before he turned around, only laughing harder as he walked to some other classmates, and clapped one of his friends on the back.
how come he didn’t annoy anyone else like he annoyed you?
in the next instant with an exasperated sigh, you walked over to your friends, hoping to complain about how much of a nightmare percy was being, but they barely let you get a word in.
“oh my god, percy, stoppp!” one of them cooed, putting on an overly sweet voice as she clasped her hands in front of her. “you’re so annoying!”
another friend batted her eyelashes dramatically. “seriously, how do you put up with him? he must be the worst.”
heat rose to your cheeks. fast.
“what do you guys even mean?” you muttered. “you’re making make no sense.”
another friend snorted, “please, be so honest with yourself right now.” and then as if to prove her point, she starting nudging your other friend, reenacting what had just happened with percy.
“perrrcyyyyy,” she drawled in a voice that didn’t even sound like you, pushing your other friend dramatically, “you’re soo insufferable!”
then your friend put on a deep voice that definitely did not sound like percy. “ahahaha, don’t flatter me, push me again, i like it.” she ran a hand through her hair, narrowed her eyes bit her lip and in an attempt to ‘act like a boy’.
“guys, what?” you exclaimed with your eyes wide in horror. “that didn’t even happen! stop!”
they all just started laughing harder, “i swear, you’re not funny,” you muttered, feeling your face heat up even more.
you turned around, fear fading momentarily as you saw percy still facing the other way, completely oblivious. a wash of relief washed over you—at least he hadn’t heard.
but then, as if he could sense your gaze, he glanced over his shoulder. he locked eyes with you, that stupid grin still there, then he raised one teasing brow at you, telling you he definitely had heard.
taglist: @lovethornes @littlemissmentallyunstable @midiosaamor @maybxlle @imaseabear
@sheisntyou @off-to-the-r4ces @anintellectualintellectual @wish-i-were-heather @hxress23
@hermesenthusiast
#percy jackson x reader#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#percy pjo#percy series#percy jackson fluff#pjo fanfic#percy jackson x y/n#pjo hoo toa#percy jackson x you#❦ jude writes
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I’m Not Your Fiancée, Ranma [a ranma saotome with fem!reader mini series] part two
warnings: anime/manga spoilers, slight canon divergence, very mild Akane bashing.
Hey guys and welcome back to the second episode in this mini series! It’s been a wild ride writing for this classic anime, and so far the Netflix remake has delivered in laughs, drama, and slow-burn romantic tension!
Thank you all so much for supporting this content, I honestly wasn’t expecting so much positive feedback from everyone or to have requests to join the taglist! 😊 Shout-out to my dear friend @deathmetalunicorn1 who helped me figure out a unique and fun way to write out this part, a journal entry from the one and only Nabiki Tendo!
So with that being said, sit back, relax, and watch for that bucket of cold water! :3
Part One
Who would have thought that Ranma Saotome would actually stand up for himself and spout off a subtle confession of love towards my little sister? Now, my dear Confidante, you may think he finally said it to Akane, and that the constant drama in my house would finally quiet down and there would be some peace, the likes of which hasn't happened since the pigtailed boy and his father came knocking on our door last year. Alas, that is not the case, because Ranma declared in the dojo that he wanted to have my adorable little [First Name] be the person he was engaged to rather than tolerate my sister once more.
Not that I blame him, really.
As much as I love Akane and the huge wade of bills I can bring home from selling photos of her at school, she can be a violent maniac whenever jealousy rears its ugly head and makes a big deal out of everything. Seriously, and I thought she was already a handful with her constant declarations of hating men, though I partially blame Kuno for that one, even if he is one of my best clients. Let me continue before I get off track. As the old saying goes, “time is money.” Naturally, Daddy and Mr. Saotome did not take the proclamation very well. It wasn’t even a minute before they stomped into the dojo and started yelling at him.
“Ranma, how could you?!” Daddy wailed as crocodile tears streamed down his face. “I know you and Akane love each other, that’s why you must go through with this engagement!”
“Boy, do you even know what you know what you are saying?!” Mr. Saotome bellowed. “Akane is your fiancee! It is your duty to marry her and carry on the school!”
Ranma scowled. “Oh, really? Do ya think she can even teach a student without flyin’ off the handle? An’ ya don’t have to be good at martial arts to run this place, anyway!” His hands hung by his sides, clenching and unclenching into tight fists. That’s usually a sign when he’s trying to reign in his own anger. “I told ya before that I didn’t come all the way here just so you can marry me off, but ya didn’t listen! So for once in your miserable old life, let me get a say in who I want to spend the rest of my life with!” He then turned to Daddy. “Mr. Tendo, I don’t love Akane. I mean…I did, or I thought I did, but all she does is get mad at me for things I didn’t do and make me try her cooking! She thinks I’m goin’ behind her back with Ukyo an’ Shampoo when they’re the ones who come onto me! What the heck am I supposed to do in that situation, anyway?!”
You could have just told them off, Ranma. But it’s your vow as a martial artist to never strike a girl. That’s how you’ve always been. As for [First Name]? Well, she was still on the floor, in shock at what she heard for a bit until she stood up and stepped in front of Ranma, shielding him from Daddy as his battle aura oozed into the dojo, changing my sweet dear Daddy into a demon version of himself, large head with a forked tongue and all that jazz.
“Dad, enough.” [First Name] said firmly. “Ranma has done nothing wrong. Ever since he’s been here, you’ve always blamed him for Akane’s unhappiness. I’m not saying he isn’t completely innocent, because sometimes it is his fault. But if what he’s saying is true, then we need to respect his decision. Mr. Saotome, I know you want to keep your promise to your old friend, but this engagement is something he didn’t want. It’s not what Akane wanted either, but everyone pushed them together. You perceived their loud shouting as adorable and believed they were a lovely couple.” [First Name] scoffed. “Don’t make me repeat myself, Father. Back. Off.”
Imagine my surprise when my easygoing little sister exerted her own battle aura into the dojo, something that rarely happens unless she’s extremely angered. I can do it, and so can Kasumi, but it’s like with [First Name]. Only when we’re really furious and that’s fine with me. I’d rather put my energy into making more money. Daddy also found it surprising, as he quickly redirected the conversation back to the problem.
“B-but the schools, sweetie! We must unite the schools before Mr. Saotome and I pass on! You know, the only way to accomplish that is through a betrothal!” I almost gagged at the sound of his whiny voice. Good grief, how pathetic.
“An engagement, not a business negotiation between two old friends?” [First Name] countered. “Where one of us manages the school, and Ranma and some other teachers can coach the students? Have you ever entertained that possibility?”
“Are you questioning our judgement, girl?!” Mr. Saotome snarled.
“I’m questioning your sanity!”
Naturally, I intervened before things got too messy. I told them all to calm down, and offered a solution: it’s obvious that Ranma does not want to get back with Akane, and he has expressed an interest in [First Name]. I had no interest in taking up bridal duties again. I’m pretty sure Kasumi still doesn’t like younger men, and has expressed little interest in dating either, at least that I know of. So, why not switch the engagement from Akane, and have [First Name] be his new fiancee? We’ll see how things go, and no pressuring them to do anything they weren’t ready for unless Daddy and Mr. Saotome want this arrangement to not work out because of their meddling. But my little sister’s earlier proposition wasn’t bad either, if things didn’t work out between Ranma and [First Name]. No one really gets engaged in high school anymore, and there are other ways to manage a martial arts school that didn’t involve marriage. I guess the reason Daddy never considered that idea is that he really wants one of us to marry his best friend’s son and retire. Mr. Saotome probably just wants to live comfortably for the rest of his life, so typical of the lazy panda man.
So, that’s where it stands now. Ranma and [First Name] have been engaged for over a week, and nothing’s really changed between them. Well, it’s more like they are still adjusting to these changes. Ranma is still weary of her, thinking my dear little sister is being nice and then will start acting like Akane as soon as [First Name] sees something she doesn’t like. Tut, tut, silly Ranma. But I’ll let him figure that out on his own, unless he pays the exclusive 10,000 yen consultation fee I offer and give an honest opinion. And [First Name]? Well, she still treats Ranma with respect, helps him with his homework, and doesn’t cling to him like Shampoo or Ukyo. In fact, if she has a club meeting, she insists he go home without her and she’ll be fine walking home at night.
[First Name] is too kind for her own good. Kasumi knows it too. She chided Ranma in the kitchen one evening when he came home without [First Name], saying it’s not a good idea to let a girl walk home by herself even if she says she will be okay. Ranma had the decency to look a little ashamed before shuffling back to the room he shared with Mr. Saotome to apparently get some homework done. Will wonders ever cease to happen in this house, my dear Confidante?
How is Akane taking this change? Not very well. She keeps insisting [First Name] can do better than a pervert, and things will only get worse. I beg to differ.
I already see that things around the house are much calmer. There’s been no fighting, no tables thrown, or Ranma flying across the neighborhood with bumps on his head. He may think we do not notice as soon as dinner is over, but he helps [First Name] with clearing the table or washing the dishes. One morning, I even saw him in the kitchen, getting her lunch out of the fridge and setting it next to her school bag so she didn’t forget it and eat at the cafeteria again. I was sure I wasn’t imagining it, sleep and caffeine deprived.
Everything will be fine. I’m sure of it. I can only hope that Shampoo or the other girls don’t get any funny ideas yet. [First Name] has said nothing about the engagement at school, and Akane just harrumphs and says she’s happy to no longer be engaged to a pervert anymore.
I want to write more, but it seems there’s someone knocking at my door. That’s strange. I wasn’t expecting any clients today. Will be back.
Later -
Unbelievable. Ranma Saotome has just left and made me richer after a lengthy consultation about where he could take [First Name] for their first date this Sunday. Mr. Saotome has been upset that he’s been neglecting [First Name] and somehow misconstrued it as a challenge, both as a martial artist and as a man. Honestly, it amazes me how can these people even be my family. Good luck little sister, you will need it.
Taglist: @djh4l0v3rv3r @silverklaus @alee24x @loverofyandereboys @akiqvq @the-dumber-scaramouche @stingywiththeirusername @mochinon-yah @gudaworks @danyzta
#an idyllic novelist#fem!reader#ranma 2024#ranma remake#ranma ½#ranma saotome x reader#ranma 1/2#mini series#ranma saotome
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Is it possible to enjoy g/t without it being a kink? /genq
100% yes. Many people in the g/t community like it without it being sexual or kinky in the slightest. In fact that’s why (at least on tumblr) there is a clear split between the kinky side and the soft side (aka Macro/micro for kinky stuff and g/t for non-kinky stuff)
But anyways; yes you can enjoy g/t without it being a kink. Most people use it as a coping mechanism and a comfort thought. Like for those who like the idea of being tiny, it’s the idea of being so small that the world’s problems can’t reach you, hidden away from prying eyes and crazy ideas. For those who like being giant it’s about being seen about being strong enough to fight the world and protect those they love. Size-shifters basically shift between the two, usually based on their mood. Although these aren’t the only reasons people like being Giant/tiny, there are many more but i just wanted to give a basic idea and I guess some psychology. Heck, Some like seeing things from a new perspective, a sense of adventure in something we see everyday. Then there’s also the mini collectors and also the enjoyment of “here’s a tiny object but BIG” (I mean giant cards? Hell yes I’m playing with those!!)
Lots of people are into it non-sexually. Cause there are so many aspects to g/t than just sex. There’s the trust building (and in some stories breaking) which, at least I believe, is one of the most essential parts to g/t; the trust. Trusting someone so big to not hurt you and trusting a tiny to not run away. There’s also the comforting stuff; like being hugged by someone so large that you just get all the stress and worries squeezed out of you with so much care so that you don’t actually pop. Having someone so small put all their effort into just hugging you and it’s not much but they’re doing everything they can to show how much they care. There’s the initial interaction where each party is frozen in time, and neither knows how to act, with their minds racing “what now?” Type thoughts run through their minds. There’s stories simply put into a g/t setting like fairies. There’s so much and there are so many scenarios out there that don’t involve g/t as a kink (Me and many others have shared these scenarios) Theres so much and there are many movies centered around g/t (like The Borrowers and the BFG) most of which are made for kids.
Heck I was into g/t as a kid (I just didn’t know what it was called) I grew up watching the 1997 movie The Borrowers and Honey, I shrunk the kids. I rewatched those so many times. I was fascinated by seeing the world from the tiny perspective. Seeing normal day things huge, it just sparked my young mind. I would daydream about it whenever I could (mostly school and church but still) The idea of being small or interacting with someone huge OR being big or interacting with someone small; it just made me all giddy. It made me smile and it might’ve been a coping mechanism but i genuinely enjoyed the stories too. I read the entire borrowers series in one month cause I was that into it. As a kid I didn’t even know it was a kink or could be, I just enjoyed it for what it was.
So yeah, you can definitely enjoy g/t without it being a kink. As they say, there’s always 2 sides to the giant quarter.
If you or anyone else out there, has any more questions about g/t, don’t be scared to ask! I’ll try my best to answer questions about it.
#g/t#anon#gianttiny#Giant tiny#giant/tiny#gt#ask#I might have rambled a bit too much there sorry#I’ve just been into g/t for as long as I can remember#but 100% yes g/t doesn’t have to be kinky#we mostly wholesome here with a small side of angst once in awhile
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online friends... and a tutor // kaedehara kazuha x reader (highschool au)
-`♡´- pairing : kaedehara kazuha x reader
-`♡´- summary : when reader gets assigned a tutor to help her with math, some secret identities get revealed
-`♡´- warnings : math | idk nothing
-`♡´- notes : this was written when i was crushing on my now ex ;-; but this was also something people loved on my old blog so repost! i hate math, scored 2.7/10 on my recent exam
dont translate, modify or repost my work. you do not have permission
Ping!
Your face brightened up as you heard your phone go off, you were glad the classroom was already full of noise so the teacher hopefully didn’t notice.
Hey what you up to?
Hiii!! Nothing much, just waitig for class to end tbh, wby?
waiting**
In class AND on your phone? Are you trying to get into detention, my dear?
Not that I should be talking, I’m doing the same.
Yk I can’t just ignore you, that’d be mean
I’d be worse if you got detention again, dummy.
You bit your lip to stop yourself from smiling. It had been what? Six months since you met this stranger online? It didn’t take more than two weeks before you became inseparable. Socials were shared soon enough, though neither of yours showed anything but pretty pictures or fit-checks. You knew he was in the same school year as you, though he was a year older because of an early birthday. But you had no idea where in the world he lived, he was more secretive about that but you did figure out that you were in the same time zone. You didn’t really mind, you liked figuring him out on your own and he didn’t mind that either.
Would be worth it tbh.
Read 14:38 PM
Kadeh? You alright? Don’t tell me they took your phone LMAO
Delivered.
“[Name], busted.” your english teacher stood in front of you, and as he said, you got busted. “I know you’d much rather be texting your boyfriend but c'mon.” he held his hand up, signaling for you to hand your phone to him.
“He’s not my boyfriend.”
“Sure, sweetheart.” he rolled his eyes at you before standing straight again. “This is three times, that means detention. Go to classroom sixteen at four o’clock, I’ll be there.”
You let out a deep breath, of course you got busted, you jinxed it, and now you both lost your phone for the day and got detention.
“Girl, sooner or later he will get bored of you and drop contact.” your friend said, “You know that’s what happens with all online friends.” you looked at her and tried your best not to slap her.
She’s right, you know. One part of you thought, while the other protested. No, she isn’t. Kadeh wouldn’t do that!
You turned your head around and ignored her for the rest of the day.
“Hey teach,” you entered classroom sixteen a bit before four o’clock, walking up to your English teachers’ desk to sign off your name on the detention list. Your eyes scanned the paper for other names.
Childe. Reason: disrespectful behavior. Of course he’d say something stupid.
Itto. Reason: disturbing class even after two warnings. Nothing new
Chongyun. Reason: talking through my lesson with Xingqiu. Of course, the cute freshmen couple.
Xingqiu. Reason: talking through my lesson with Chongyun.
[Name]. Reason: texting during class. Sigh.
Yoimiya. Reason: disturbing class even after two warnings. That rarely happened, she must’ve been excited over something.
Kazuha. Reason: texting during class. Seemed like she wasn't the only one today.
Cyno. Reason: playing cards with Kaveh during class. Tcg obsessed assholes.
Kaveh. Reason: playing cards with Cyno during class.
“Sir, could I have some blank papers? I filled up my notebook during my last class.'' He handed you some and you turned around to find a seat where you’d be sitting for the next hour. You found a spot next to the window behind Yoimiya, who smiled at you. You watched the others come in, Cyno and Kaveh going straight to the back of the room, Childe sat in the row next to Yoimiya and the two started chatting away, Itto moved to the spot right besides the door, Xingqiu and Chongyun were in the front, and finally the last student entered the room. Kazuha, you didn’t share any classes with him, you were in classes one, and he was in two. Meaning you’d never gotten the chance to properly meet over the last few years.
You knew him from walking around in the hallways, standing in line behind him in the cafeteria, small shared smiles and awkward nods as you locked eyes with him during lunch. After he signed off his name he walked to take the seat beside you.
“So I wasn’t the only one caught texting today.” he joked as he sat down, holding out his hand, “Kaedehara Kazuha,”
Seemed like today was the day you finally got introduced to him.
You fell down on your bed with your phone in hand.
Kadeh? You alright? Don’t tell me they took your phone LMAO
Guess what? They did, and detention.
MINE TOO BYE AND THEN TEACH PUT ME IN DETENTION AS WELL
So you WERE trying to get into detention, huh? Pfft I didn’t realize I had made friends with a bad girl.
You just told me you got into detention as well and you’re calling me bad? Your teachers are just as bad as mine, or you’re just as bad as covering your schemes as me.
I promise you, my dear, I am not bad at covering up my secrets.
You must have a lot of them then.
How ‘bout you come find out?
You giggled at his texts, he never failed to make you do so. As you rolled off your bed to grab your homework and laptop you heard your phone buzz a couple of times, and coming back to your bed you checked your messages.
No worries tho, I’m not THAT bad.
I don’t sell drugs or guns or stuff like that
I just get into detention for giving my sweet girl the attention she deserves.
Which is totally worth it except when they take my phone and I CAN'T text you.
Whoops sorry was gettrng my books and laptop
You not respondfing within a minure basically menas your phone got taken, and possibly got detention too. Or you’re passed out on your couch
But I gotta go, well not that i wnat ot but i have math homework that i have to make otheriwse theyll assign me a tuotr and i dont want htha
Fuck ym grammar oml
No need to apologize dummy
But go make your homework, I won’t disappear
“[Name] your test results weren’t great. I see no other choice but to assign you a tutor to help you out ‘till the end of term.” you stared at your math teacher in defeat. You knew you weren’t great at math, but Kadeh had explained the difficult things to you since the guy was amazing at basically everything.
“Is there really no other thing? Something that doesn’t include a tutor.”
“Yes. You paying attention.” he looked back at you before grabbing another paper from his desk. “Let’s see, it says here that Kaedehara Kazuha is available, you good with that?”
That wasn’t the worst person, he was pretty chill to you ever since you met in detention. The awkward nods and smiles now turned into small conversations and hello’s, with still the smiles. “Yeah sure, fine by me.” “Great, just go to the library after your last class and you’ll probably find him there.”
They gave me a fucking tutor.
Turns out my test didn’t go as well as i thought it went.
Ughughughughguhgughugh
Why me.
Read 11:32 PM
As you were about to type your next message your head and later body hit something–someone.
“Ouch!” your hand flew up to your head and the books in your hand fell to the floor, where your phone already was.
“I’m so sorry, please. Are you okay?” you knew that voice and you looked up to meet Kazuha’s eyes. You nodded in return, crouching to gather your books and phone.
“Though my screen protector is less fine,” you laughed as you saw it shattered, your messages with Kadeh gone blurry due to the cracks. “Are you alright?” looking at him he sat down beside you to help you with your books. “I am, no worries. I was just texting my f–someone. Where’d your bag go?” he said, standing up with some of your books in his hands and offering you the other; which you gladly took. “My friend's bag broke, and I just had these few books so I gave her mine. Besides, I got a spare tote in my locker.” you reached out to take the books from him, but he turned around and started walking.
“I’ll walk with you, can’t let a pretty girl carry these heavy books alone now can I?”
You laughed at him while shaking your head, a slight blush coming to your cheeks.
“Did you hear the news already? My math teacher assigned you as my tutor.” quickly changing the subject you walked to your locker as he followed behind like a lost puppy.
“Yes, I saw the email come in. Wanna meet in the library after class?”
You agreed as you opened your locker and placed your books inside. You grabbed the spare tote bag and threw in your economy books and art supplies for your next few classes. “Sounds good, and thank you and sorry.”
He winked and turned around to his next class.
Okayhe isn’t hat bad
Excudr my grammsr my screen protecotr broke cuase i bumpedi nto him and ym stuff fell
No worries, dear.
See, I told you it’d be fine. Now you have someone that can explain it to you one on one, instead of over dms.
Kazuha looked back over his shoulder to see [name] typing away on her phone, and at the same time his phone was exploding.
Yes but youre jsut better yoou know.
I meani dk him yet idk how he ‘teahces’.
What if i dontunderstandh im?
Yk i odnt like telling people i odnt understand.
It’ll be fine, dear. You just go to his lessons, pretend to understand, then afterwards you talk to me about it and I’ll explain some more if needed. Sound good?
Thnak you kadeh ilysm
I love you too, my dear.
A small smile danced over her features and she scrunched up her nose in adoration. No way that his best friend and lowkey crush, which was strange since he’d never seen her face, was this cute girl from school who he was now going to tutor.
Gotta go to my nect class, i htae economy ugh.
Goodluck sweetheart, you can do it!
Oh fuck.
“So mister Kaedeh–” you cut yourself off and giving the blonde before you a suspicious look before continueing, “Kaedehara Kazuha, how you think you’ll be able to make the math math for me?”
“By showing you how to think logically.”
You rolled your eyes and smiled before throwing your bag on the floor. As you sat down you checked your phone to check if you got a message from Kadeh or not, and when you saw none you shut your phone down.
“Let’s get started then.”
Twenty minutes later you were solving equations that gave you headaches before. Now it all seemed to make a lot of sense and with Kazuha’s help you were on a streak. He looked proudly as you moved on to the fifth one with no trouble, you raised your writing arm to your face to inspect the equation on the paper, and before Kazuha could ask if you were alright you were already writing again. Every now and then you’d furrow your brows, pout a little, or bite on your lip as you studied the paper. When you were finished you gave Kazuha the sheet of paper with a smile and he started to correct it, explaining how to do certain things faster for example. Sometimes you’d nod, other times you’d give him a strange look to which he just laughed before explaining.
Safe to say that you walked away from the extra math lesson with a lot more knowledge and confidence, and a new friend.
Okay okay he isnt that bad at explaining. I actually understand it now and i was on a roll, or well he said that.
After he explained soem thigns eh had me make about fifteen questions, after he corrected them and explainedw what i did wrong and how ic an do other thigns differently so itll be faster.
I actually understnasd
I told you it wouldn’t be that bad, dear. I’m proud of you, I know you did great.
Next time im meetng him is enxt week thursday, same time.
We agreed to meet every week same time until end semester cuase thats what teach said.
Yeah, not that bad right? Just once a week cannot hurt. And he doesn’t seem like the worst type of guy.
He isn’t no, he has a calming aura, its nice to be arounf him. Hes prety too ngl
Thugh some people at school spread some odd rumors aboit him
Liek that he sells weed and sht.
Oh well even if eh does idc he expains math like a pro.
Anyways imma head home, no driving and texting. Talk soon!! Loveyou
Drive safe, sweetheart. I love you too.
Kazuha stayed in the library for a while longer. When [name] was leaving she was already typing away on her phone, and mere seconds later his phone started exploding. Reading her texts made him sit in silence for a bit before responding. He was now certain that she was his online best friend. She told him the things he told her and it all just added up. He threw his head back as he looked at the ceiling that was painted to resemble the night sky.
Not before long he saw Heizou and his mob of dark red hair above him.
“What happened? Why are you slouching?”
Kazuha sighed as he sat up.
“I think my best friend may be in this school.”
“Uh yeah, hello, here I am right in front of ya, buddy.”
Kazuha looked at Heizou desperately.
“Oh shit, you mean [online name]? What? How? Why? What?!”
“I tutor this girl, [name]. This morning I bumped into her while I was texting [online name], she was busy on her phone too. I didn’t receive any messages from her when [name] and i bumped into each other, but she was typing. Then I offered to walk her to her locker and carry her books because she lent her own to her friend. She dropped her economy books into her new bag. Later [online name] texted me she had economy class, and that she hated it.” Kazuha started at the wall as he spoke mindlessly.
“Yeah okay… But those can all just be coincidences, you know.”
“Then just now when she was leaving she was typing away on her phone, and seconds later [online name] started messaging me. Then she told me how her tutor told her she was on a roll, I told [name] that! Then she said that there were some rumors about her tutor, that he sells weed. People say I sell weed! I don’t but they say it!”
Heizou just stared at him for ten seconds before his mind came up with a master plan that goes as follows.
The next time [online name] is texting him Heizou will sneak up on [name] and look on her phone, if it’s who she thinks is Kadeh then the mission is a success, and if not then Kazuha’s heart will calm down.
And so the following day Heizou stood behind [name] with another friend of his, just ‘talking’. As Kazuha gave the sign she was typing, Heizou looked over her shoulder to see what she was writing.
Yeah! I genuenly cannot wait for summer either ughhh
Heizou and his friend bolted back to Kazuha when she sent it and he snatched the phone from his hands.
Yeah! I genuenly cannot wait for summer either ughhh
He looked Kazuha dead in the eye before giving him his phone back.
“Go get your girl, loverboy.”
Four weeks had passed since that day. Four weeks, four Thursdays, four tutor lessons. [Name] realized that Kazuha was acting differently lately. She would catch him staring at her during those lessons, or even more often during lunch break. She would always give him her sweetest smile, and he’d return it before breaking eye contact with a small chuckle. Their friends started noticing too, there was some sort of tension with someone in the cafeteria but they couldn’t place who.
It took another week before Kazuha decided to just go for it. He knew [name] was already in the library because her last class had been dismissed early. So when he saw her curled up on one of the couches, his heart melted. His phone vibrating in his pocket let him know she was texting him, some personalized do not disturb setting that let only her messages through.
He grabbed his phone and sent her a quick text, ignoring the things she had said before.
I cant reply rn, I have to tutor someone.
You tutor???@?@!! You never told me
There’s more I haven’t told you.
Like what?
Look up, sweet girl
You looked up in confusion and locked eyes with Kazuha. Your eyes widened and your mouth fell open. Looking back at your phone, then back at Kazuha tears came to your eyes.
“Hello, my dear” he softly smiled as he took a slow step towards you, cupping your cheeks as tears were seconds away from falling. “You’re–” your bottom lip started trembling as you buried your face into his chest, one of his hands coming to hold your head as the other held your back, slowly brushing up and down. “I hate you–but I don’t. You–”
You felt his chest vibrate, letting you know he was laughing. You gripped at his shirt–which you now realized was the shirt you’d seen a thousand times before on his instagram.
“Who knew the sweetest girl in town,” he dropped his head to talk right next to your ear, “was actually my sweet girl?” He felt you trying to bury yourself even deeper into his chest. “No no, sweetheart, you need oxygen.” With that you pulled back, your big eyes staring back at him, a little bloodshot and your cheeks all red. “Not funny,” you whispered, “You don’t wanna know how much I was hoping you were actually living in my town, went to school here and I don’t know. I’d be happy if that were the case unless you were Childe.” tears came back to your eyes. “And what if it was me?” he rested his forehead against yours, looking you directly into your eyes. Blood rushed to your cheeks as you replied.
“Then I’m afraid that I won’t be able to stop myself from falling for you–Kadeh–even harder.”
One moment you were talking and smiling, looking directly into the male's eyes. The next you were processing what was happening as his lips collided with yours.
“Even in real life you seem to have a processing time to what I say or do.” he said when he pulled back.
“Can you blame me? Look at yourself.” Kazuha swore he saw hearts in your eyes before you closed them again and pulled him back to you, lips once again meeting each other.
“No, I can’t. But you, my dear sweet girl, are even more breathtaking than I imagined you’d be.”
“Mister Kaedehara and Miss [name]! Detention!”
-`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´--`♡´-
dont forget to like and reblog <3
#kazuha#genshin impact#genshin#kazuha genshin#kaedehara kazuha#kazuha x reader#kazuha x you#kaedehara x reader#kaedehara kazuha x reader#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader
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just a girl
benny week, day four: cheerleader
relationship: betty weir | benny weir/rory keaner, betty weir | benny weir & ethan morgan
rating: teen
word count: 939
summary: Dressing up as a cheerleader and being flirted with by Rory awakens some things in Benny. (transfem benny weir)
read on ao3 or below the cut
Benny wasn't sure what Jane had done to them, but he liked it. He almost felt bad though, because he could tell it was making Ethan somewhat dysphoric. However, Benny actually felt really good. He liked the feeling of the longer hair, and the makeup felt foreign but right somehow. He felt pretty. He must've been pretty too, considering the way Rory bounded up to him and started flirting with him. Benny wasn't gay- he knew he wasn't gay. So why did the way Rory looked at him give him butterflies? He needed to talk to Ethan- tomorrow though. It had been a long day.
It wasn't until they cracked the case that Benny was able to find time to talk to Ethan. By then he had realized he was in a lot deeper than he first anticipated. The additional days of flirting and makeup had really done him in. It also affirmed his feelings about everything that was swirling through his head. Him and Ethan were playing video games in his room when he finally worked up the courage to bring everything up to his best friend.
“Hey Ethan, can I talk to you about something?” Ethan paused the game, and turned his attention to Benny.
“Yeah, B, what's up?”
“You know how we had to pretend to be Betty and Veronica?”
“Yeah…?”
“I sort of… liked it? Like the whole dressing up.”
“Okay, just the dressing up part?”
“I’m not even sure, honestly.”
“That's fine! Do you think maybe you'd want to try out she/her pronouns?”
“Maybe?”
“You don't have to rush into anything! Does being called he/him make you dysphoric?”
“No, I don't think so?”
“That's fine! Is there anything else?”
“I didn't hate when Rory was flirting with me?”
“Wait- what?” Benny just shrugged in response, “ so, not only are you maybe a girl, but you might also be into Rory?”
“Basically,”
“Wow I never thought I'd see the day a girl was into Rory,” that made Benny laugh. It also made his- her heart flutter. Ethan called her a girl, and it felt amazing. They continued their night like usual after that, and that also felt good. It felt normal and right. Someone knew, and the world spun like usual.
Now she just had to figure out how to tell the others. Especially Rory. She wrote him that letter to hopefully stop him from talking about Betty anymore until she figured out what she wanted to do. It was cheesy, but wasn't exactly that far from the truth either. It took her a few more days, but she worked up the courage to leave another note in the vampires locker, this time just telling him to meet her in the gym hallway after school, so they could talk
Betty was sweating bullets as she paced the hallway back and forth. Her mind was swirling with thoughts. What if Rory is upset at her for lying? What if he won't see her as a girl? Will he even want to be her friend? Just when she was starting to think this was a bad idea, she heard the all too familiar voice.
“Benny? What are you doing here? I'm waiting for Betty, so I hope you don't plan on sticking around too long,” She cringed internally at that. She knew she had to get out what she wanted to say before she lost her courage.
“Rory, I'm Betty.” Rory's face morphed into confusion.
“Um no you're not? Betty is blonde. And a girl, duh,”
“No Ror, me and Ethan dressed up as Betty and Veronica to keep an eye on Erica, then to deal with the whole witch cheerleader stuff,”
“I'm so confused. So Betty isn't real?” His voice sounded so vulnerable, and Betty’s heart broke in guilt. She took one step closer to Rory, small and barely noticeable.
“Yes, and no? She wasn't at first. But I think Betty feels more real than Benny at this point. I don't know,” Rory's face was still one of confusion, and a faint glimpse of hurt, “but, I do know that I like you.”
“Wait- what?” Rory's face was still one of disbelief, but the hurt was replaced by hope.
“I didn't know how to tell you, but surprise?”
“You're Betty, but actually- and you like me?”
“Yeah?”
“This is awesome!” Betty felt physically relieved. Rory wasn't upset. She should've known he wouldn't be shitty about this, especially because he knows about Ethan. But it was good to be sure that she was worried for no reason.
“It is?” Rory just looked at her like she was crazy.
“Uh yeah? I mean it's still a little weird that you're actually Betty, but not in a bad way! Wait, does this mean I can take you out on a date?” Betty shouldn't have been surprised by his bluntness, but it made her flustered regardless
“Yeah, it does,” she smiled at him. He returned the soft look.
“We can have dinner at my place, so you can dress however you want without others around, if that's what you'd prefer,” he looked uncharacteristically shy. Betty took his hand. She was sure vampires couldn't blush, but she wasn't sure if something like that has ever stopped him.
“That sounds perfect, Ror.”
#mbav#my babysitters a vampire#benny weir#rory keaner#ethan morgan#my babysitter's a vampire#hivesys speaks#mbav fanfic#bettory#bennory#bennyweek#bennyweek2024#bettory fanfic#bennory fanfic#mbav moodboard#moodboard#betty weir#betty weir edit#betty weir moodboard
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Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 8
Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.
Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications
Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here
First - Prev - Next
CH.8
“You’ve been down here forever PhD. Maybe you should… I dunno, leave your evil basement sub-lab? Maybe eat something other than an entire tube of toothpaste?”
“This isn’t toothpaste. It’s a calorie-rich blended solution formulated specifically for daily nutrition, in a convenient tube to avoid the need for cutlery.”
“Doc. Read the label.”
“...”
“You should probably sleep too if you mixed those up.”
“You’re just trying to get me to leave so you can escape.”
“I’ve broken out of county jail, the trunk of a sinking car, a shipping crate, cement shoes, and even my loan sharks book club meeting. But this? A forcefield? A real, no-shit forcefield? I don’t have anything for that… anymore.”
“What was that last part?”
“I said I can’t break out of sci-fi prison. Go to bed already, Doc - it’d be a lot easier for me to sleep too if you weren’t hovering over there, looking at me all sad like I’m some stray at the pound about to be put down.”
“Fine, but don’t go anywhere.”
“Well there goes my plans for the night.”
“...What plans?”
“For the fifth time, it’s called sarcasm.”
“Now that I think about it, I think I still have an invention I need to calibrate…”
“Specs was right; how did you survive out here by yourself?”
(...)
“Thanks for helping me clean the place up, Fiddleford. I’ll admit, I’ve been putting it off for a while now.”
“You don’t say… You know, you still haven’t told me what that extra level in your basement is for.”
“I’ve already told you, it’s a private study.”
“You’re so secretive about it.”
“Private study.”
“Alright, alright.”
“After we’re done here, I have an anomaly in the woods I need to check out; would you be willing to keep an eye on the house and the lab while I’m gone?”
“I have no problem making sure your brother doesn’t disappear into thin air, of course I’ll stay back for your peace of mind.”
“That’s not what I asked.”
“It’s what you meant - oh don’t make that face at me. I’m not trying to make fun of you, I think it’s… Endearing, that you care so much even if you have the worst ways of showing it.”
“...Just keep an eye on the house. And maybe go down there every so often to interact with him, the isolation isn’t doing him many favours.”
“How did your last talk with him go?”
“He’s still convinced that I’m grieving over my ‘real’ twin, and using him as a substitute because we look alike. He can acknowledge that the timeline and traits line up, and that he himself has a missing past, but he still thinks he’s a ‘Malone’ and not a ‘Pines’. I don’t know why he’s being so resistant to the possibility…”
"You know... 'Stan Malone' sounds mighty similar to 'Standalone'.
*Ford facepalms*
“I thought it was clever.”
“It is, that’s why I’m mad.”
(...)
“-and it’s actually called ‘Backupsmor’? That’s its name?”
“Yes.”
“Wow. They didn’t even bother hiding what they were huh?”
“I suppose so. What about you, Stan?”
“Pft, I didn’t go to college. I’m… pretty sure? I didn’t graduate high school.”
“You’re not fully sure?”
“F, I can only remember back when I was 17, and I was already living on the streets. I don’t think I could have graduated by then. Not like it would have helped me.”
“17, you say? Interesting…”
“What about you? Your whole family full of geniuses like you?”
“Everyone’s… smart in their own way. I’m the only member of my family to attend college, however. The rest of my family works on a hog farm.”
“That’s pretty cool, striking it out on your own.”
“Mighty kind of you to-.”
“Good-looking, smart, and independent? I like that in a-.”
“I’m back!”
*Fiddleford hastily presses the mute button on the containment unit*
“Stanford, you’re back! How was it?”
“I was hoping it was something new, but it was just the gnomes trying to utilize the size changing crystals. How were things here?”
"I was just getting more information on what past he does remember- didn’t rightly get much because he is such a flirt."
"He's only doing it to a) make you uncomfortable, b) make you let your guard down, or c) charm you enough to convince you to free him."
"Well he hasn't quite succeeded on any of those. Does he flirt with you?"
"That's disgusting, Fiddleford. I don't know how you do things in Tennessee, but here it is improper for siblings to-."
“Genius, didn't you just say he doesn't believe you're related?"
“Somewhere in there he must still know I'm his brother. Which is a good thing for us because his memories can't be buried too deep."
TAPTAPTAP
*Fiddleford presses the mute button of the cell to unmute it*
“No, that's not it. That motherfucker is ugly.”
“Ugly? We have the same face!”
“Yeah, but on you it doesn't work.”
To be continued...
#for your own good#early amnesia au#mystery trio#Stan calling Ford anything but his name#fords evil basement sub lab#stereotypes about the south and midwestern united states#fiddlestan#stanley pines#stan pines#stanford pines#ford pines#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#fiddleford mcgucket#gravity falls#fanfiction#fanfic#cross posted on ao3
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PRAY FOR ME
Father Charlie Mayhew x reader
a/n: this might be a part one… I don’t know how to write for father charlie… dr. mayhew however 😏 anyways I’m mid writing for dr charlie so… ;) enjoy!
word count: 972
YOUR MOTHER had always taught you to seek God for all times of need. In the face of the devil’s temptation, sin, helplessness or anything that would stray one’s path from God. You’d go to mass every Sunday, following along with the words of the priest and often staying a little longer to pray. That was, until Father Mayhew became the new priest in your small town church.
He was immediately known for his looks and his young age, taking the attention of many young girls in your town. To their dismay, he was already devoted to someone, God. He was a man of the cloth, holy in his intentions and words, preaching the gospel as his life depended on it.
You and Sister Megan were acquaintances to say the least, knowing her as she’d hang around in town, seemingly lingering in all the places you wouldn’t expect a nun to be near. Her quick mind and sharp tongue had her helping a detective- detective Lois, that was, in the shocking murders that were snaking through the town. It’d shocked you to your core, such violent acts in near your home leading your mother to believe the devil was returning himself to earth. A ‘warning’ , she’d said, panicked and confused.
“It is a warning from God and a message from the devil. It is the manifestation of all that is wrong with the world mustered up into an act of pure sin.”
Your mother had advised you to spend more hours in the church, in God’s house, in the presence of holiness. So you took her advice and made your way to the church after school hours, unsure of what to do other than pray.
As you made your way into the church, you made the sign of the cross, smoothing out your skirt and sighing at the warmth of it. There was no one in the pews, excluding Father Mayhew, who sat silently near the front seemingly lost in thought. It was only when the soft click of your shoes caught his attention that he turned and smiled, standing and greeting you warmly.
“Ah, apologies I didn’t hear you come in. Your mother came by earlier to let me know to expect you here”
He spoke softly, his eyes darting over your body as he noted your damp clothes from the rain outside. You nodded and shrugged, a quiet giggle leaving your lips as you tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear.
“Well yes, father, my mother told me I should come here instead of directly home as it’s closer and well, the days are getting shorter and much darker”
You avoided his gaze as you spoke, not wanting to bear the weight of it as his dark eyes almost bore into yours, however lacking of boredom, more filled with understanding and concern.
“Your mother is right in doing so, it’s not entirely safe for young girls to be walking home alone in darkness. Especially now with these.. acts of violence, consuming our town”
His words were smooth as he ghosted a hand by your lower back, guiding you to the front of the church to the altar. You were familiar with how it all worked, having been to mass every Sunday since you were young. You’d watched Father Mayhew deliver sermons weekly and gotten used to his powerful voice, almost caught in a daze as he spoke. You were no stranger to the allure of him to other women, but being a strict follower of God you never acted inappropriately, immediately asking God for forgiveness.
His voice was smooth as honey, his eyes dark and almost dangerous, his mannerisms pure and holy. This man was a sin in himself, ironically. A man claiming to be so devoted to God but he was just like any other man. He was no stranger to sin, he wasn’t always a priest. You noticed the way he spoke, his eyes betraying his words as his gaze lingered just a second too long on places forbidden to a priest.
“father-“ you turned to face him but he was quick to interrupt, correcting you
“no need, please, call me charlie”
You uttered a small ‘oh’ and nodded, turning back around and keeping your hands busy with the strap on your backpack, avoiding Charlie’s eyes. He ushered you to continue, sitting opposite you but still close.
“fa- I mean, charlie.. I feel as though I have strayed from God..”
Your voice was small as you picked at loose strings and crossed your legs at your ankles. Charlie nodded and leaned forward, placing a comforting hand on your knee and tilting his head.
“how so? I am sure God will forgive you, you are a good Catholic, no? I do see you attend mass every week, sometimes more than once per week”
His words were light as he smiled at you, leaning back and resting his hands crossed in his lap, focusing back on you as his lightheartedness seemed to have no uplifting effect on your mood.
“I feel as if I am doubting Him, Father.. I know He will protect me but in our town, such violent murders… I am very afraid, I must admit.”
“well, sweetheart, you can find comfort here, until your mother can drive you home. until then, why don’t you relax in my office hm?”
You nodded meekly and followed behind him, the soft click of your heels once again echoing in the church. You kept your head low and followed him to his office, your mind filling with questions and wonders that God would bring shame upon. So it brought shame to you, clearing your mind and cleansing your thoughts with thoughts of God. Perhaps it would be a very long few hours in Father Charlie’s company until your mother picked you up.
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rice balls and heart eyes
osamu miya x reader
trigger warnings- talk of food, talk of weight game (in a positive way), food, suggestive, biting (affectionate)
summary- you’d rather watch him than make onigiri
this is my first written fic so probs not great, but you have to start somewhere ^.^
Osamu let’s out a snort, a hint of a smirk on his lips,
“Distracted, angel?”
You look at him, shooting him a halfhearted glare, “Shut it, miya.”
You’ve been sitting on the onigiri miya counter for about fifteen minutes, Osamu standing between your soft thighs. there’s a, well… he wouldn’t really call it onigiri, in your hand. The lump of smushed rice and tuna in your palms.
It’s not your fault, really. Can your boyfriend really expect you to focus on anything when he’s wearing those god forsaken compression sleeves? You would call them heaven sent, but only the devil could create something quite so sinful.
You let out a hum, smooshing the rice ball in between your fingers. Your chin lifts as you put on your most condescending tone, “I’m not entirely sure what you’re talking about anyways.”
Osamu grins, hooded eyes looking down at you, “Oh, nothing, nothing. Someone just seems a bit preoccupied. What yer’ doing to my ingredients could be considered cruel and unusual.”
You just narrow your eyes, huffing softly before scowling back down at the food in your hands, “What I’m doing to your ingredients?? This rice is bullying me!”
‘samu snickers, usually dull eyes sparkling with amusement, “The rice is bullying ya’?”
He can’t help but smirk as your eyes roll again and you can’t help but give him a swift kick to the shin, to which he simply laughs. You can only grumble before responding, “it’s being difficult on purpose! it doesn’t do this to you.”
He hums, feigning deep thought at your comment, “Maybe because i pay attention to it?”
Your fingers quickly grab a piece of the mushed rice, flicking it at him, “Maybe you should stand up for your girlfriend, huh?”
Your boyfriend snickers, and despite your slight annoyance, you can’t help the slight warmth in your chest at the sound of him. You sigh wistfully, looking longingly into the distance , “If only my big, strong boyfriend would stand up for me…”
This time, osamu’s head drops back with his full laugh. He takes the mess of an onigiri from your hands, properly placing it between your palms and fingers. His warm hands gently squeeze and position your fingers and all you can do is stare up at him dumbly.
When he lifts his head back, his smirk is still there, soft lips, slightly chapped, as always, quirked up. You just blink at him, lips slightly parted.
“Anyone home, babe?” His knuckles rap lightly at your temple.
Your eyes shoot back to your hands, the rice ball somehow now perfectly formed as you shake yourself back into the presence, “I think i’m a pro at this. How much do you pay beginner chefs?”
Your love’s forehead presses to yours, callused fingers lifting the snack to your lips. “Open up, angel.”
Your lips part as if on instinct at his voice, soft and firm, and he slips it into your mouth, fingers lingering lightly on the tip of his tongue before he pulls them back.
You watch, eyes half lidded, as you swallow. The flavors burst against your tongue, just like his food always does, but you hardly notice the taste as your eyes flicker right back to the sliver of tan skin between his black tee and the dark compression sleeves, practically itching to bite at the thickness of his bicep.
So you do, your teeth sinking into the soft skin. there’s a light layer of pudge over the hard muscle that has you practically about to drip drool on the skin between your teeth. Osamu’s not quite as slim as in high school, the lack of daily training and cardio allowing him to form the most delicious bit of fat over his muscles, which are bulkier than ever from lugging around bags of rice and spending all day forming onigiri.
He doesn’t even flinch, used your affectionate, slightly canibalistic, ways towards him. He just grins, something that he’s done more and more of lately, the stress of the shop a more enjoyable form of exhaustion than volleyball.
He starts working on the next onigiri for a moment before sitting it to the side, strong hand cupping your jaw to pull your teeth from his arm. He gently leads your face to tilt up to him, nose nuzzling yourself as he presses his warm lips to yours.
You both smile against each other, you think you could spend forever here, on his counter, making half hearted onigiri.
#miya osamu#miya osamu x reader#miya osamu fluff#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu fic#hq#hq x reader#hq fluff#osamu miya#osamu miya x reader#osamu miya fluff
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I’m gonna VENT in these TAGS
#the carpenters daughter may be married with a kid & own her own buisness at 22#but I have something she could never Dream of#adhd & autism#and like also I haven’t had a Normal adulthood#like I started off being 18 and getting into an abusive codependent relationship#and when I got out of said relationship we were in a pandemic and my mother had stage 3 breast cancer#LIKE#I dropped out of school to take care of her#which fun fact my mother also did at 20#for her own mother#generational trauma something something#2023 was the first year I actually had the chance to think about what I wanted in life#SO considering I’ve only been human for 1 year (jack Kline vibes)#I think I’m doing pretty good#so what if I’m only doing part time school#so what if my job is a bit unpredictable financially#SO WHAT if im taking my time & living with my parents until i can actually work without putting my health & wellbeing at risk#not 2 mention I currently don’t even have my own bedroom because of The Mold Scandal
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My favorite part of fafsa is where it doesn’t even ask you if your family is going to contribute, it just assumes they will, and then spits out a total bullshit number based on that 🙄
#sis somehow convinced me to try to do college again#and each and every time I have to log into the school websites I truly wonder if I made the right choice because Oh my god#not only are the instructions given lackluster#the website(s) themselves are a fucking nightmare to navigate#part of the issue is that things ARE NOT LABELED as they’ll tell you they are in the instructions#so they’ll tell you to go to. like. my academic history or something#but that’s NOT what the tab is called#nor is it found where they said it would be. also that part is mislabeled too#so seeing the financial aid part be so absolutely bullshit after finally FINDING IT is uh. infuriating:)#also it’s saying I’m missing a portion of some kind of verification I’m real#EXCEPT that every way to verify it IVE ALREADY DONE#that shouldn’t even be an issue?!?!?#*screams*
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*draws something for the first time in a while. “Man I suck at drawing! Maybe go back to being good at it if I draw more!”
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
*doesn’t draw
“Oh I got a neat idea for a drawing! Surely I have gotten better by now!” Loop post
#this revelation brought to you by the one and only#midnight brainrot#probably could not of put these things together without the malaise of a mind awake at 3 am again despite saying that they’re ”trying to fix#their sleep schedule ~”#bah. I say things yet never do them. my brain always blocks any sort of progress with ”just one more video”#even fun and enjoyment bends the knee to this declaration#even other YouTube videos!#when I do break it I end up back where I was because like asking for literally anything my brain does so much pushback that it feels#inherently wrong on a fundamental level#I don’t think I’m depressed I like life too much and enjoy existence#is this my brain punishing me for not dying before reaching adulthood like I always thought I would? or is it punishment for not constantly#going from the end of high school to another school like I planned because my purpose in life was to learn and go to school until I die#now I am left without purpose. literally wandering my house like a ghost when no one’s home#I say the two same things to my brother when he gets home so much that he once made a joke about me being an npc#and the worse part is. it wasn’t about that dumb TikTok brainrot meme thing. no it was because I say the exact same things the exact same wa#y every time he gets home. worse more is I can think of several other ways that that statement could be more accurate that he doesn’t know a#bout#I wish to game but never do#I want to make art and such but I never do#I went to an art class for years when I was a kid for Pete’s sake!#my parents complain about my hair being too long and I agree but I still want it long I just always kept it short because of simple ma#maintenance. the only reason I ever grew it out was to keep warm I. the winter!#I spent my childhood with self imposed utilitarianism for no reason#no reason to expand my horizons and explore myself because I thought of myself as a lesser being that was fated to die randomly before#I could reproduce.#oh my goodness the reproduction thing! I thought I was straight for the longest time because I had to be#because the purpose of a person is to reproduce. yet I was all like”I can’t reproduce as I am autistic and would taint my offspring. I am a#genetic dead end and deserve to have the effect of natural selection take place”#through tv show mimicry and being a utilitarian little git I forced myself to be straight for years#and the worse part is I KNEW GAY PEOPLE EXISTED AND I ENVYED THEM FOR NOT HAVING TO REPRODUCE OH MY GOD IS THIS WHAT KARKAT FELT LIKE? NO I
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guys I just survived a ladder that wanted to kill me. cheers
#context- I work odd jobs in film production a lot. I recently picked up a new part timer filming high school football games#this particular one was an hour and a half away so needless to say I was already mentally preparing for a LOT#and I got there and the spot where they wanted me was on the ROOF of the press box. which I knew beforehand#what I did NOT know beforehand was that the only way up or down was a ladder that pops down from said roof#which would’ve been okay but I was carrying three equipment bags like a pack mule#so I climb the ladder and even that was fine until the top step#I faceplant straight onto the roof because there is a barrier that’s like a foot long between the ladder step and the roof floor#so. rough start. but the view is great and once I’m up there it’s kinda fun#until. UNTIL. I wanted to go pee because again. hour and a half drive to get there.#said barrier made it so you have to climb down to get to the ladder step and railing and I pissed around playing chicken with that thing for#for an HOUR playing chicken because I could not fucking handle it#so I get through the first half okay but decide that I’m booking it to the bathroom the second halftime starts#and I forced my fat arse over the ledge and I figured out a grip on the trapdoor thing that helped keep me from falling#and I felt like I’d just made a person break cause like. I genuinely was not sure how the fuck I’d make it down for a bit#after that? might’ve been the high of Doing The Scary Thing but the rest of the time I had fun#I got a nice coach in the press box to help grab my bags as I handed them to him so I could climb down to leave#drove an hour in pitch darkness on country roads to my boss’s house to drop off the footage then 20 minutes home and now#and now I think I could sleep forever and ever but I fuckin did the thing
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#why am I such a disappointment#it’s like I do nothing right#I just told my dad that I applied for a part time tutoring position#I was proud of myself#been struggling to find a job#yet what does he do#goes off on me#about not getting a job this summer#says I really disappointed him#I’m trying to find a teaching job#this is my last summer before I’m full force in the work force#I just wanted to enjoy that freedom#don’t have much on my resume#but only cause my parents said a job could wait#as long as I’m in school#didn’t mention that rule#didn’t apply for graduate school#i’m trying#i’m really trying#but it’s hard to get motivated#i feel like I’m never enough#and can’t share the things I’m proud of#cause then he just goes off on me#and it makes me feel so worthless#so stupid#such a disappointment#nobody cares though#26 unemployed and uninsured#just needed to rant
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