#so obviously they are all telling me funny

[tinythebunni]

rafe had his eyes on you for a while. you were new to the island and everyone wanted to be by you. you seemed to have this energy that attracted everyone, like a fucking magnet.

rafe couldn’t believe his eyes when he saw you. you were everything he could want in a girl. tall, slim, curvy, shiny skin, beautiful hair, and most of all you were so feminine. he loved a girl he could take care of, provide for even.

he first saw you at the country club. you were clad in skimpy pink bikini with white polka dots, a white bow in the side of your hair, and white flats on. you read some magazine he couldn’t be bothered to even pay attention to. for right now, you were his main object of his attention. you could feel his eyes on you, you usually did.

you’d been here only two weeks and you knew all about the infamous rafe cameron. there were rumors he killed some cop and he had a drug problem.

people said he was one of the most fun people in the world but he would blow up in the quarter of a second. no girl could hold him down and he always got what he wanted. everyone wanted to be him or fuck him.

he’d made slight advances in the short amount of time you’ve been in the outer banks. holding a door open for you, paying for your drink, offering to apply your sunscreen while you tanned at the beach, the whole shabang.

you didn’t give him the slightest ounce of your attention. you wanted him to work for it. obviously you wanted him but you can’t let him know that! if rafe always got what he wanted then he wouldn’t mind a challenge.

you liked this game of cat and mouse you guys played. you didn’t know how much longer you could take it though. your friend daphne had invited you to some kook party at her stupid chad bfs house.

you went of course because rafe would be there. and you wanted him to see you, especially in this outfit. a lacy pink halter neck and pink mini skirt with ties on the sides. it showed just enough of skin to make him crazy. you wanted him to know what he was missing out on.

who knows? maybe tonight you’ll let him have a taste.

after a while of being at the party you started to get a bit bored. there were people making out in the corners, the alcohol tasted shit, and rafe still wasn’t here.

you were slightly buzzed and contemplating walking out when you saw him. he wore only a white wife beater and some denim jeans. what really caught your attention was the way his eyes were immediately on you when he came in.

he looked you over, greeting a few people, but not once did his eyes stray off you.

“top, i gotta go handle something. i’ll catch ya later.” and with that he strides over to you, grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you into a room upstairs.

you had butterflies in your stomach. after a month he couldn’t take it anymore. you were excited to see what he would do now.

he swiftly locked the door and turned towards you with an almost primal look in his eyes. you giggle as he rubs the back of his neck and glares.

“do you think this shit is fuckin funny? been wanting you for months and you think it’s game. do you know how hard you make me? those skimpy fucking skirts and that coy smile.“

you were positive you looked like a fish out of water right now. you could feel a heat rising in your belly and a blush flushing your checks and neck.

“i didn’t know i affected you that much” you whispered.

“bullshit. i see you close your thighs each time i fucking look at you. can barely focus on anything when you’re near by.”

rafe is stalking towards you now, and you back up more and more until your knees finally hit the bed. he pushes you back until your lying on your back, with only your elbows and forearms holding you up.

he pulls your skirt over your tummy, glancing up at you as he places a kiss on your thigh.

“tell me this is okay. i needa know what you taste like. i can’t fucking stand it. so close to your pussy i can practically feel you on my tongue already.”

you give a shaky nod but that’s not enough.

he pinches the inside of your thigh and shakes his head with disapproval.

“no. baby i need words. use your voice, ain’t even touched you yet so i know you’re not fucked out already.”

“yes, yes rafe this is okay! please i need it” you whine while your lips pout slightly.

he was being so mean right now! is this what it felt like for him all this time?

he places a kiss on your clit over your panties and thumbs at your entrance. he smoothes your arousal over your lips and curses under his breath.

rafe takes his time making you whimper and whine. you push your hips up for some kind of friction, something more than he’s giving you. he uses his left hand to hold you down while his right pushes down on your clit, the pressure making your eyes roll back.

“calm down sweet thing. s’okay. m jus getting you ready. been dreaming bout this and i wanna take my time”

the cameron boy takes off your underwear and pauses. you can’t tell if he’s in awe or disgusted.

“so fucking pretty baby. is this all for me?” he questions as if he doesn’t already know the answer.

“rafe of course it is, do you see anybody else in this fucking room?” you’re mad now, you’re so fucking horny and he’s being a tease!

“alright alright” he laughs, placing a kiss to your thigh and looking up at you one last time.

“not letting you go after this is done. you’re mine.”

[menagerofmischief]

Nugget Update (MV1)

sumary: y/n's always giddy after getting a nugget update, sure she loves her best boy, but it also has something to do with the cat sitter sending the updates

driver!reader x cat sitter!max verstappen -> habs incoming... series masterlist

cw: not fia approved words, a bit of lance hate (I don't actually hate him), mutual pinning, the grid teasing the reader, lot of appearances from the reader's cat, kissing, kinda mean!reader (to the grid)

wc: 4.1k

a/n: this is my first time writing in 2nd person so bear with me. also, I low key hate this and it may be shit. not proof read!

“Well aren’t you a ball of sunshine?” A voice called out, disturbing the peace - or the closest thing to peace you could have near a Formula 1 track.

Your gaze snapped up, eyes narrowing as you took in the man standing on the entry of the RedBull garage. “Hello, Charles,” you replied, a teasing bite obviously heard in your voice as you crossed your arms over your chest. “I know you wanted to experience what a successful garage looks like but I thought Ferrari had a better hold on you.”

Charles laughs, his eyes crinkling as his lips stretch into a smile. Teasing Charles was always a fun time but that’s all it was, just a bit of fun. It never stretched into something meaner, just two people showing affection by teasing each other.

Charles had been your very first real friend on the grid. The first to offer his hand with a smile and genuinely mean it. The first to congratulate you on a win after getting out of the car or the first to say that the next race would be better. Really, he was your best friend, but you would never tell him that or it would go to his head.

“Funny, very funny.” He said, his accent thick. His eyes slid around the motor home until finally meeting your own. “Lot of drivers are going out for drinks, came by to invite you.”

“I don’t Charles,” you started to say, going through your mental list of excuses, searching for the best one to use to avoid this social interaction.

“Oh come on!” He whined, rolling his eyes. He gave you a look that let you know you could stop thinking about an excuse because he wasn’t going to be buying it. “We won’t stay that long and it’s night race tomorrow so you don’t need to wake up at the crack of dawn.”

You pressed your lips together, the lip gloss previously applied making them slide against each other easily. 

Charles kissed his teeth, nodding his head along. Fine, he’ll play the game. “Some of the WAG’s are coming as well.”

“Are you really trying to lure me out by promising female company?”

“Is it working?”

“Eh,” you shrugged your shoulders. “Will you pay my tab?”

Charles scoffed. “Pay your tab?” He asked, sounding as if you had asked him for his firstborn. “You’re filthy rich! You have a bigger salary than me!”

“Yeah, they do pay world champions a bit extra, comes with the title.” You replied, grinning at him, a wide teasing grin, your eyes twinkling. 

“Fine whatever, I’ll pay your tab.” He said, raising his hands in surrender. “Now go take that suit off and shower, you look disgusting.”

“You look like a trash can threw you up!”

“It threw me up because it saw you!” Charles shouted back in response, his back already turned to you as he walked away, back to the Ferrari garage. 

And that’s how you ended up in the bar, an hour later. Squished in the not too comfortable and definitely not meant to sit so many people, booth. With George’s girlfriend Carmen on your left, and Pierre’s girlfriend Kika on your right, and deep in conversation with both of them. 

You feel your phone vibrate under your hand on the table, and the screen lights up, showing off your wallpaper, a picture of your beloved cat Nugget.

You tune off from the conversation the moment the message arrives, grabbing your phone and pulling it in towards you. Your face lights up, lips stretching into a smile as your eyes focus on the sender ID. Maxie.

Or rather Max. The very cute guy who was your cat sitter whenever you were out and about in the world, chasing the racing track. 

With a quick move of your fingers, you swipe up, opening your phone and going into the message app. Fingers quickly tapping along the screen of your phone as you type out your reply.

With a smile you closed the messages app, pressing your fingers against the button on the side of your phone, watching the screen go black before setting it face down onto the table. As you looked back up, Lando’s amused yet teasing expression caught your eye.

You leaned forward against the table, pressing your hands to the wooden surface as you attempted to get a bit closer to the driver on the other side of the table. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Oh nothing,” he said with a laugh. “Just wondering who you’re texting, that’s all.” He intertwined his fingers, elbows pressed against the table and leaned forward as well. “You were all grumpy cat but then you get a message and suddenly you’re all smiles.”

“Grumpy cat?” You scoff, rolling your eyes at the McLaren driver. “I’m not a grumpy cat. And for the record, that was Nugget’s babysitter and he was sending me a picture of Nugget.”

Lando laughs, there’s a twinkle in his eyes that tells you he wants to say more but he holds himself back. “Can I see? I haven’t seen the orange gremlin in so long.”

“That’s very mean,” you say, opening your phone to show him the picture, that Max had sent you. “Nugget would never say that about you.”

“That’s because Nugget can’t speak.” He looks at the screen and his lips twist upward in a smirk. “Who’s Maxie?”

You breathe out through your nose, teeth digging into your bottom lip. When you speak your voice is sharp, it leaves no room for questioning things or an invite to ask more questions. “The cat sitter.”

“I’m sure that’s all he is.” Lando laughs when you show him your middle finger before settling back into your seat and returning to the previously abandoned conversation with the two WAG’s.

The race went pretty smoothly, as always. Starting from pole, keeping the lead the whole race and with a 20s gap to car in P2. Everything after that was pretty much a blur, the interviews, partying through the night with the grid and boarding the jet early in the morning.

The sun already started setting by the time you made it to Monaco. With a sigh you rummaged through your bag, blindly feeling around the stuff inside before your fingers finally wrapped around the keys.

Opening the apartment door you walked inside, gently laying down your suitcase as your eyes settled on the scene in your living room. Right there, laying on your couch, in deep sleep, and cuddling your cat is Max Verstappen. 

His hair had fallen over his eyes and the position he’s in looks rather uncomfortable, you’re sure his body will be aching when he wakes up. His chest was raising and falling with each breath he took, little sighs slipping past his lips. Nugget was cuddled up to him, curled in a ball.

You looked at him for a few moments before starting to move around as quietly as possible, not wanting to wake him up. 

Max had been cat sitting for you for a while now. Half of last season and now half of this one so almost a year. He was a sweet, kinda shy, mostly nerdy guy you ran into in a coffee shop and spilled his coffee. You offered to buy him a new one and he joined you for the coffee and you got to talking when he said he was looking for a job so you offered him to become your pet sitter.

At that point you really did need someone to look after your cat while you were gone, since you had broken up with your ex who usually took care of Nugget while you were away. And you couldn’t leave Nugget with your parents since your father was allergic to cats.

Now, your best friend who had been working in a different country had returned to Monaco and said she’d be more than happy to look after Nugget - but you wanted to keep Max around. 

Already having grown used to coming home after a race weekend to find him there, just existing in your space.

Nugget’s whiskers twitch, his eyes opening and he pulls himself away from Max, stretches out and then trots over to you, rubbing his head against your leg affectionately while purring. He let out a happy, albeit a bit too loud, meow when you picked him up and on the other side of the room Max began stirring from his sleep.

He opened his eyes, a bit confused, and rubbed his knuckles against his eyes to wake up, blinking a few times as his eyes adjusted to the light filling up the room. 

“You’re back,” he says, his voice is gentle, still sleepy and a bit quiet. His eyes meet yours and he offers you a sweet smile that has you immediately smiling back at him. “Didn’t mean to fall asleep, sorry about that.”

“Oh no, it’s no problem,” you reply, running your hand over Nugget’s fur as the cat lay happily in your arms. “You can use the guest bedroom if you’re tired, you know. The couch may be expensive but that doesn’t mean it’s comfortable for sleep.”

“I didn’t want to overstep,” Max said, pulling himself up into a sitting position. You approached the couch and sat down, the cat nestling in your lap and purring in content. Max smiled, reaching out his hand and petting Nugget.

“Nonsense Max, you’re not overstepping.” You cut him off, leaving no room for argument. You always told him to feel at ease in your apartment, that he was welcome to any food in the fridge and free to use the guest room as he pleased but even after all this time there was still a slight air of awkwardness backed up by the fear of going a bit too far.

Max’s eyes settled on you, your own focused on your cat so you didn’t notice him looking. He watched the way you cooed at Nugget, asking if he was a good boy while you were away and petting him gently, and his lips stretched into a small, careful smile.

He spoke before thinking. The words left his mouth before he even finished the thought inside of his head. “I watched the race,” he said, and your eyes instantly snapped up to meet his. He swallowed, already too deep to back down. “It - “ he licked his lips, trying to decide his next words, feeling like his tongue had tied itself up in a knot. “You were spectacular. It was lovely … simply lovely.”

You let out a breath, the corners of your mouth twisting upwards and you gave him a thankful look. Max swore he could feel his heart beating in his throat, and felt his cheeks heat up. “Thank you,” you said, your voice gentle, holding a comforting tone. “I’m glad you enjoyed it. And it’s nice - knowing you watched.”

“It is?”

You bit your lip, teeth scraping against you bottom lip as you looked at him, your brain running faster than the Sauber (like it’s hard) as you tried to come up with a response. “It’s kind of comforting,” you finally said, after what felt like a small forever.

You hummed, looking down at your nails. “I was thinking about bringing Nugget with me to the next race. It’s been a while since he was in the paddock.”

“Oh,” Max said, an edge of confusion noticeable in the tone of his voice. “Does that mean that you don’t need me coming over next week?”

“Actually, I was hoping you would come with.” You say, before you can talk yourself out of making the proposition.

Max tilts his head to the side, kind of like a confused cat and you try your best not to giggle at the mental image. “I’m not sure I’m following.”

“If you wanted to attend the Grand Prix,” you tell him, running the edge of one of your nails along your skin. “Cuz’ I’m still gonna need someone to look after Nugget, and you do that in general so this would just be an added bonus of traveling.”

Max is silent for a few moments and you think he’ll decline. You wouldn't fully blame him if he did, you know what the pressure of the paddock can be like. You’re about to open your mouth, tell him that ‘never mind, it was a stupid idea anyway’ and put him out of the trouble of finding a polite way to decline when he finally speaks. 

“I suppose, if you want me to then yeah, I’ll come along to watch Nugget.” He says, trying to ignore the nervous feeling building up in his chest when you smile at him, a wide happy smile that makes him instantly smile back.

“Great!” You said, the excitement evident in your voice. “Someone from the team will contact you in a while to arrange the tickets and leave the rest to me.” Max nods, he doesn’t trust himself to speak, not with the way his throat is closing up and it makes him feel like he can’t breathe.

“Look at you all giggly,” Charles teased, gently pushing your shoulder with his hand. He wiggled his eyebrows, a laugh slipping past his lips as you glared at him.

“Charles, why don’t you turn around and flash your pretty face to the crowd.” You said, rolling your eyes. You looked at the stadium full of people who were shouting out for their favorite drivers, waving banners and cheering happily. You smiled towards the stadium and lifted your hand up, waving your fingers to the public. “Give them a wave.”

“See, I always knew you thought I was pretty,” Charles replied, waving at the public. The two of you and the rest of the grid were in a wagon, going around the track for the drivers parade, so essentially you were stuck with him for at least five more minutes. “Now, do tell who’s got you smiling like that.”

“Is it Maxie?” Lando asked, the teasing tone evident in his voice. He pushed himself closer to you and Charles, inserting himself into the conversation. 

“Didn’t your mom teach you not to eavesdrop?” 

“No, no!” Charles said, shaking his head as he waved his hand dismissively as you, his full attention now focused on Lando. “Who’s Maxie?”

Lando smiled at him, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “The cat sitter,” he said in a sing-song kind of voice. 

“The one you brought to your garage?” The Ferrari driver asked, his attention back on you. “The pretty one.”

“Hold up!” Lando almost shouted, raising his hands. “You brought him with you to the Grand Prix?!”

“I didn’t … well I did bring him.” You said with a sigh, there was no escaping this now. “But it’s not like that. He’s here to watch Nugget.”

“And for you to watch him - because boy that is one good arm candy.”

“Charles, your homosexual is showing,” you warned.

“But you’re not denying it,” Charles noted, giving you a smirk.

You rolled your eyes at him but finally gave in. “Yes, I’m not denying it.”

You stepped back into the motor home, your eyes immediately searching for Max and finally you found him talking to your lead engineer. As you approached the two you could start to hear their conversation and quickly realized they were talking about how the car worked and what went on behind the scenes at a Grand Prix. You found it cute that Max was interested in that.

His eyes met yours and his face lit up, the corners of his mouth twisting upwards into a smile. “You’re back!” He said, “After terrorizing everyone around and getting pets, Nugget decided to settle down for a nap. He’s in your driver's room.”

Max gave you a wink after saying that and you had to hold in a giggle. You excused yourself to go to your driver’s room, with Max following behind you. The first thing you noticed when you went inside was Nugget, curled up on the massage bed and sleeping without a care.

The next thing that grabbed your attention was a dozen pastries lined up on a small table next to the couch. They were all individually wrapped in tissues.

“Max,” you said, picking up one of the pastries and unwrapping it. “I really did mean only one pastry, you know?” You bit into the chocolate filled pastry, moaning at the taste of a treat you weren’t usually allowed to have when it was race week. “My trainer will strangle me if he sees.”

“I swear, no one saw anything.” Max said, shuffling over to the couch and sitting down. “I was sneakier than Nugget when he’s stealing my food.”

“Oh, now that’s a very serious claim.” You told him with a laugh, his own laugh echoing back. You picked up one of the wrapped pastries and offered it to him. “Take one, or five. There’s no way I’m eating it all.”

He takes the pastry you’re offering him, his fingers brushing against your own as he takes it from your hand, sending sparks of electricity down your spine. After a second of hesitation you sit down next to him, the two of you eating the treats in comfortable silence.

His thigh nudges against yours and you turn to face him, finding that he’s already looking at you. He smiles and you don’t hesitate to smile back.

The practices go great, P2 in FP1, P1 in FP2 and P1 in FP3. 

The qualifying is where a slight setback shows up, with quali being ended early due to a crash and a red flag, putting you in P10 for the start of the race tomorrow.  

Once the car had rolled back into the pits you wasted no time getting out, putting the steering wheel back into place before storming into your driver’s room. 

You pulled your helmet off, fingers curling into the bottom of your balaclava as you pulled it off, throwing it next to your helmet before bringing your hands up to smooth down your hair. 

“I’m not in the fucking mood, Pepe.” You said without turning around, assuming it was your race engineer coming to talk about the outcome of qualifying. “Fucking Lance and his fucking money made seat - if that little frog screws up another quali, I’ll be the one crashing him out.”

“I’m not Pepe,” the other person in the room says and you instantly turn around, your eyes wide as they meet Max’s blue ones. “And I’m certainly glad I’m not Lance.”

You looked him up and down, eyes trailing over his figure. You took notice of Nugged, cuddled up in his arms and looked at you curiously, and reached your hand out to pet the cat, a long breath slipping past your lips. 

“Sorry,” you said with a shrug of your shoulders. “I didn’t really mean for you to hear that.”

Max barely heard what you were saying. Too distracted by the sight of you for his brain to properly register your words. Your skin was slightly glistening with sweat, an imprint from where your helmet and balaclava had dug into your skin still visible on your flushed cheeks. Your messy hair, and your chest raising and falling with each breath you took as you were still working on catching up your breath.

Max blinked, finally snapping out of his thoughts and focusing his attention back to what you were saying. “They should have let you finish the lap.” 

“I agree but sadly that’s not how it works.”

Max nodded along, not really knowing what to say to that so he switched to the next topic. “I ran into your friend. He invited you, and me, out for drinks. I think it would be nice to go, you seem like you need a drink.”

“Yeah, I definitely do.” You replied, taking Nugget from his arms and into your own, stroking down the cat’s body. “Which friend?”

“Uh,” Max started, thinking of a way to describe the guy since he couldn’t remember his name. “Wears red, pretty, sounds French.”

You laughed, smiling at him. “That’s Charles. I hope you didn’t tell him he sounds French, he gets offended by that.”

“Then it’s great I kept it to myself.”

You laughed in reply, putting Nugget down to the floor, the cat immediately moving to a cozy corner and curling up into a ball on the floor, shutting his eyes. “The hotel is right next to the track, you can take Nugget back while I shower and then we can go - if you want to.”

“Sounds like a deal,” Max replied with a smile.

You showered and put on a clean set of clothes just in time to meet Max after he finished dropping Nugget back to the hotel, leaving him with toys, food and water. The two of you made your way to the bar to join the rest of the grid for a night out. 

Some of the drivers were playing pool while their girlfriends were engrossed in a conversation so that left you and Max sitting together, sharing drinks and talking.

“I just …” you started, cracking your fingers. “I don’t know, this quali really messed up my mood and I was riding on such a high after the practices going well. It all feels shit now.”

“Maybe you just need more motivation for the race.” Max offered, drinking the rest of the liquor from his glass in one go. 

“You have something in mind, Maxie?” You asked, the nickname slipping past your lips without a thought now that you’ve had a few drinks. 

“How about a kiss if you get on the podium?” He said, his voice suggestive. Normally he never would have dared to say something like that but the alcohol courage really worked wonders. 

Your eyes widened, clearly not expecting him to be so bold or to suggest that. He took your reaction as a bad sign, immediately straightening up as a wave of dread quickly sobered him up.

“I’m sorry,” he gasped out, the expression on his face shifting into a panicked one. “That was stupid. It was thoughtless. It was -”

“A great motivation,” you cut him off, putting a finger up against his lips to silence him. “It was a great motivation.”

His cheeks burned as his eyes met yours. He looked so vulnerable, his bright eyes impossibly wide. “Yeah?”

“Yeah!”

“One more corner to go but you’re in the clear,” Pepe’s voice echoed over the radio. You blinked, your eyes focused on the track before you, the checkered flag already visible along with your team gathering in the front. “That’s P1, Y/n. Phenomenal drive today, you deserved it!”

“Thank you,” you said, your voice breathless as you moved your hands, going through the last corner and speeding towards the finish line. “Thank you, Pepe.” You repeated, swallowing your spit. “It was lovely, simply lovely.”

You put the car into P1, getting out and posing for a picture on top of your car. You could hear the shouts, the cheers, the celebration. You took off your helmet, ripping off your balaclava and putting them both into the car before turning around to face the team, eyes searching for a particular face. 

Finally, you spotted Max. Standing besides your engineer, a proud expression on his face as he looked at you with a wide smile. You didn’t hesitate, feet moving before you could think and then you were in front of him, grabbing his shirt and pulling him down, smashing your lips into his.

The kiss was desperate, both of having waited long enough for it. He wrapped his arms around you, the best he could with the fence between you, kissing you back with need. 

You finally pulled away when you felt your lungs burning from the lack of oxygen, learning your forehead against his. Nothing else mattered, not the public, not the team, not the celebration. Only him, finally yours.

“Simply lovely, right?” You asked, your voice breathless.

“Simply lovely!” Max repeated back to you, before kissing you once again. And he really did mean it - everything was simply lovely.

tag list: @formula1-motogpfan @misty-inferno @thelemonque3n @marvel-hotchner @strangemaximoff @folkloresreputation @pippyth3hippy @adharacambridge @theseerbetweenus @sebastianstansblog @tellybearryyyy @six-call @grussellsprout @oikarma @justcharlotte @annimausi

i hope i tagged everyone who said they wanted to be on the tag list. hope you enjoyed this one and keep an eye out for the poll about the next part of the series <3

[nevertheless-moving]

Considering the amount of emotional and moral nuance he managed to muster up immediately post Guanyin temple (despite having a terrible week and zero good role models) AND considering his front row seat to the dissection of Jiang Wanyin and Wei Wuxian’s downfall, I think that in a time travel fix-it, Jin Ling would actually be pretty successful at brute forcing yunmeng family therapy.

I mean he'd probably cry, but even that would be good! Because 1) modeling negative male emotions beside anger, and 2) Oh shit that’s shije’s kid we made Shije’s son cry, fuck, fuck! Bam! Instant high ground! Also he has the most authority of any second gen character by virtue of the fact that he could pull “DO YOU WANT MY MOM TO DIE??? BECAUSE YOU TWO ACTING LIKE MORONS IS WHAT GOT MY MOM KILLED! NOW SIT DOWN AND SPIT OUT ALL YOUR FUCKING SECRETS OR MY MOM WILL DIE AND I’LL BREAK YOUR LEGS!!” It would work! Tell me it wouldn't work!

Not to mention once he gets a few sect leader years under his belt, he might be the best person to manage a fix-it, in general. He's got perspective. He's got political training. Others might get too caught up on the specifics of the Wen remnants or the Ying Tiger Tally or Vengeance against One Person or Another — Jin Ling is critiquing the basic structure of how Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng are living their lives and he's getting away with it.

He would even be good at dealing with Jin Guangyao, the slipperiest motherfucker in the timeline. Jin Ling's got as good a handle as anyone on his motivations, and he has sincere (if messy) affection for him, which would hit Guangyao right in his weak spot. Depending on your headcanons it may or may not be in vain, but he's got a real chance of getting the man to set some more modest and less destructive life goals.

Similarly, I think he'd do a pretty decent job at a harsh-but-fair critique of Xichen's neutrality and Mingue's rigidity and Huissang's delibrate uselessness, though getting them to listen would be more of a crapshoot.

All of this makes it especially funny how badly he would handle Wangxian.

For context: Wei Ying and Hunguang-jun are not just the gayest people Jin Ling has ever met, they are the gayest people he's ever HEARD of.

He wouldn't want to bring it up. He wouldn't mean to. He doesn't want to talk about it. But when he inevitably calls Wei Ying a slur only to be met with genuine bafflement? Jin Ling would completely lose his shit.

Because I don't think Wei Ying is going to get offended, or defensive, or have a response that his nephew could coherently mock. Wei Wuxian thinks 'hey these time traveling guys are actually pretty funny!' Him and Whom? Not even a serious topic of contention. You got me for a second, haha.

Jin Ling would break. Wei Ying eventually says something the effect of "I'm straight? Obviously?" and Jin Ling would nod once, start screaming, then climb across the table to strangle him.

It's — look. How do you fucking explain that all of the worst moments of your life were, in someway or another, characterized by Wei Wuxian and Lan Wanjii being FLAMBOYANTLY into one another.

The man who saved his life also killed his father and Jin Ling stabs him but it feels awful and — ok Lan Wanjii is cradling Wei Wuxian tenderly. Ok they're just going to go. They're leaving like that. Hunguang Jun was — is — was the Yiling Patriarch's widow, so that's another layer to add onto everything else. Hunguang-Jun is visibly expressing emotions with his face and voice and Jin Ling is going to go throw up now

Jin Ling's kidnapped at the burial mounds and everyone’s lost their spiritual energy and all his friends and family are going to die and — those two are smiling at eachother. They're telling inside jokes. They're holding hands.

Jin disciples (his own clans disciples) just shot at him and and Xiao-shushu really is what people sa— WEI YING SHOUTS ABOUT WANTING TO FUCK LAN WANJII

THEY ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF BEING KIDNAPPED AND HE DOES THIS

Jujiu is bleeding from the stomach and crying he's bleeding and crying his jujiu is doing that and Xiao-shushu caused it and his whole life is a lie and Hunguang Jun and the Yiling Patriarch are visibly groping in a corner.

And then they never stop groping again. Forever.

So yeah, I'm quite confident that if Jin Ling had to be even peripherally involved with coaching Wei Wuxian through a bisexual awakening and homoerotic courtship, he would explode. He would black out with rage. He'd make an honest and embarrassingly unsuccessful attempt at killing Lan Zhan. He would walk into a lotus pond and stay there until he drowned. He'd start heavy drinking. He'd punch a random passerby in the dick.

In conclusion, Need More Jin Ling Time Travel Fics

[suzukiblu]

WIP excerpt for inkwell behind the cut; “Billy and Damian and the whole soulmate thing”. (( chrono || non-chrono ))

Like–except Robin, obviously. Robin doesn’t deserve him being spiteful. Robin deserves, like, a nice wedding with Nightwing as his best man and Red Robin, like, definitely invited but maybe seated at a table off to the side behind a tactically-placed floral arrangement or twelve and also whatever Robin likes to eat on the menu, which Billy admittedly doesn’t actually know yet and probably needs to figure out. Though then again, if he’s running away from the Justice League and/or Batman’s weird seventeen-bedroomed house until he’s eighteen, Robin’s tastes are probably gonna change a bit, so maybe he should just wait on that so he can be sure he’s getting it right and all? 

Ugh. Billy really doesn’t wanna have to run away from the Justice League until he’s eighteen. Especially not Batman. Batman’s really good at finding people, so he’s basically just gonna have to hide out at the Rock of Eternity for like the whole time, and that is so long and is gonna get so boring so quick. 

Ugh. Ughhh. Ugh. 

“Where was that? Laws about supplying alcohol to a minor vary significantly from state to state,” Batman says as Flash slithers to the floor with an actual moan. Billy glowers at him. He is still not forgiving him just ‘cuz he’s funny. “And felony charges can apply to repeat offenders."

. . . alright, Batman’s really funny. But still, dammit! 

“Bats, I really don’t think accidentally buying a drink for a magically-disguised minor three years ago is the relevant concern here,” Green Lantern says in exasperation. 

“You said you took him to multiple bars,” Batman says, just barely tilting his head. “Was that the only time any of you bought him a drink?” 

“I–you–he looks like forty!” Green Lantern protests. Flash just stays on the floor. 

Batman raises an eyebrow behind his mask, then looks over at Billy and looks him over; then looks back to Green Lantern with a very telling expression. Green Lantern sputters indignantly. 

“Stop being funny, asshole, I’m still gonna be mad even if you are,” Billy grumbles at Batman, who just makes the same little “hm” noise he always does when he’s feeling particularly smug about a joke he’s made. Billy scowls at him on principle. 

Asshole. Geez, like Billy’s new here or something. 

“Father, this is hardly professional behavior,” Robin says, giving Batman a withering look. 

“God, I will never understand what kids even think Bats is saying,” Green Arrow mutters under his breath, half-covering his face with a hand and eyeing Robin through his fingers. “Listen, Cap–Billy–” 

“Excuse you?” Billy asks, scowling at him instead. “You think we’re on a first-name basis while you guys are threatening me?” 

“Listen, brat, I am also a licensed foster parent, and Star is closer to Fawcett than Gotham is, so I in fact am threatening you,” Green Arrow retorts, narrowing his eyes at him. “And there’s eight bedrooms in my house.” 

“That is not a house!” Billy says. “That’s literally not a house, that’s like a hotel! Why do none of you just have houses?!” 

“A motel, perhaps,” Robin drawls, eyeing Green Arrow disdainfully. 

“I am not living with anyone, I’m fine,” Billy emphasizes with a glower. “I’ve been fine all this time, haven’t I?”

“. . . Billy,” Superman says, looking stressed. “How long have you been homeless, exactly?” 

“Since I was like seven,” Billy says, since he doesn’t count any of the in-and-out foster care nonsense as not being homeless, considering. That’d just been a bunch of shitty places he’d had to sneak out of or run away from, not actually anywhere he’d ever really lived. Mostly he’d slept in abandoned buildings or alleys or parks, ‘cuz it’d been safer. “So I’m fine, obviously.” 

“Since you were seven,” Superman repeats, looking stressed. 

“That’s what I said,” Billy says in exasperation, folding his arms again and glowering at him. “And I didn’t even have superpowers then and still took care of myself fine, so I’m double-fine now, actually.” 

Superman puts his face in his hands, for some reason. Black Canary pats his back sympathetically.

Billy does not think Superman deserves sympathy right now.

[illuminiscentboba]

will iwaizumi get the memo? (he will, finally omfg)

plot: where you so obviously like him to the point that even oikawa is well aware of this crush but iwaizumi misinterprets your relationship with oikawa and is proven otherwise

its another rough day of studying, forcing yourself to read just another page before you give in but your mind already drifted elsewhere, the words your reading not actually flowing comprehensively in your head.

you had plans after this, plans to see iwaizumis childhood pictures with oikawa. you had helped the unserious volleyball freak run errands among other favors and he had offered you favors you could cash in whenever you wanted.

and today was the day, you were hoping to see a stunning, tan skin buff guy cooking at oikawas apartment but if he didn't come at least you would be able to look at the pictures.

packing up your bag with haste, you rushed to catch the train, already mentally preparing yourself for all the teasing you would get from the brunette as you melted at their childhood pictures.

you can already hear his coos and "you want him so bad," "simp" especially with how smug he looked whenever you guys were in the room together, god forbid how obvious and irritating he was when you guys would talk and do activities together.

Thankfully, his place wasn't far, you knocked and a long duration of time passed, before you knocked again, maybe they didn't hear you? you continued to wait, still nothing.

finally just as you were about to spam call your friend, the door swung open, apologies flowing out of the mans mouth, but not your friends mouth. a different mans mouth, his damp hair drooping, his lips curling into a half smile. "hey, y/n. shittykawa told me you were coming."

"hey." you greeted back, beating oikawa up in your head. "sorry if I made you rush out of the shower, he told me he'd be here by now."

"no problem, I looked kind of crazy earlier so I'm glad he told me so that I could freshen up." he freshened up because he heard you were coming? you tried not to let the delusions go to your head as he, picked your heavy bag swiftly off your shoulder, headed down the hall. he picked up a towel propped on the counter to continue drying his hair.

you made yourself comfortable on the sofa, trying to spot where your enemy, you mean oikawa, put the photoalbum.

iwaizumi watched your curious glances around the room. he had been wanting to hang out with you one on one and if this was the chance he'd be dumb not to take it. he reached into the drawer, pulling out the thick albums.

"looking for this?" he headed over with two albums, one with a baby plastered over it, the other with volleyballs on it.

"yeah, did he tell you to give me this too?" that sneaky man. "yeah, but he didn't tell me which one." that was a lie, oikawa had insisted he bring out the album he had with the two of them but why would you want to see that when there was already an album with just oikawa you could see.

he slumped into the sofa next to you the album with him and oikawa on his lap as he handed you the other one.

you flipped it open, trying not to think about how close you guys were and the way he leaned closer to see. you flipped through one page, then another then a few more, your pace quickening. did oikawa get confused? and thought you wanted to see him and not the sexy man beside you that you talk about eveyr week?

"wait slow down,"

"oh sorry, let me go back."

"no thats not what I meant...wait didn't you want to see these pictures? aren't you going too quickly to see them?"

he turns to look you in the eyes as you force away a conflicted look, not sure how to go about this.

"here look, thats oikawa this is when he lost his first tooth and finished crying about it." he points to the page, reaching over to flip to the next one for you. and here is when he caught his first ever fish, I caught an even bigger one but I don't know where the picture of that went.

he pointed out a few more with funny stories attatched to them, enjouying your giggles, and the questions about where he was during these pictures and what other memories does he remember with them.

he found himself talking much more than usual and more about himself than oikawa. he tried to get back to the topic, but you effortlessly returned the topic back to him, who you were more curious about.

In fact the photo album was brought back to his lap, and you were hardly focused on it, watching him as he recalled the stories.

"actually...there are some photos of me and him if you want to see."

he gestured to the book under the open album on his lap and you couldn't hide your enthusiasm as he handed you the album. "oh my god." you shrieked, stretching out the letters. oikawa had told you that iwaizumi was a roundfaced, skinny little kid that expressed himself well with his eyes, his sharp tongue, never failing him over the years but god was he adorable.

"oh my gosh you guys look soooo cute!" iwaizumi is complebely flabbergasted by your reaction. you looked at oikawas childhood pictures with barely much enthusiasm, the occasional giggle or oh my god coming from your mouth as you quickly flipped though it.

but here you were closely examining the pictures with you two together. you flip through a few more at a slower pace, stealing glances at him and baby iwaizumi, the sharp, angular jawline nothing like the circular face with plumb cheeks holding objects greater than his size.

"do you think I don't look cute anymore?" he jokes, catching onto your comparison. "well, growing has done you justice." he chuckles, telling you in detail his stories of bravery in the wilderness, and the mundane, shifting closer as he explains.

"please...why do you look so happy holding up these creatures?" you say through a fit of laughter. his obsession with bugs was hard to explain, you laugh at the embarassed scratch of his neck and flush, calling him one of those bug catcher pokemon trainers you fight against your will at the start of most games.

"bugs are terrifying, now I know who to call when I see a spider."

"they aren't that bad." "yeah they are" "your missing out." he insists, a soft smile growing on his face.

you point out another of those picture of iwaizumis chest swelling with pride as he displayed other strange objects to the camera and oikawa, and he lifts his shirt, pointing to the nicks and old scars on his body from those adventures.

you run a careful hand over the scars on his arm, his voice still laced with warmth startling you. "you should bring your baby pictures next time. I want to see them."

"do you?" you lift your head from his arm, looking directly up into his eyes. "and do you want the storylines behind my pictures?"

"I sure do." he hums, shifting your hair from your face. "though they're probably not that different from your face right now."

he can't dodge your swipe with how close you guys are, catching your arms with a laugh. "are you saying im the epitome of youth?"

"no im saying you could still do some growing." now maybe you won't be showing him your baby pictures.

the door suddenly slams open, a frazzled oikawa carrying an armful of groceries, the stack of it covering his face.

"y/n?? are you here?! did you find the iwa-chan album?" iwaizumis already straightening you up and untangling your limbs, the what have I told you about bringing everything up at once by yourself coming out of his mouth before he processes oikawas words.

"wait, you came here to see my baby pictures? and not his?" oikawa barely make it to the counter with the cluster of stuff. already stepping away after he places it onto the counter, sensing he's messed up.

"well...I can explain...."

yall shld read this:

studying with a sleepy akaashi and him pulling moves on you (they're working)

[starberry-cupcake]

I had time to read just one chapter but I wanted to make a recap anyway because the next chapter is like 360000 pages long (I may be exaggerating slightly) and I'm not sure if tomorrow I'll be able to update, so we're doing just gideon tonight (I have a feeling she'd love that wording)

previously, in harrowcita del 9:

this happened

CHAPTER 48

gideon tells harrow that she should have probably killed off mercygirl but she wasn't "thinking straight"

when has she, though

she decided to keep going further into the emperor's infested bolthole

she finds a lot of corpses of bees that have been killed already

and thinks harrowcita would have appreciated how bad and nasty everything looked

then follows the corpses and the scent of despair and murder and finds yandere twin at the end of it, standing like a pulp fiction killer

gonna illustrate with a susan denberg movie poster I find appropriate

yandere twin gets emotional and goes "harry, you're—"

to which gideon answers with "Alive, bitch"

gideon says that she "had long since ascended to the rank of double douchbag" which I consider another memorable instance of chad catching strays

and gideon has some Issues to Resolve with yandere twin

and by resolve, I mean fix them with Violence

she starts getting upset at all the things yandere twin did to harrow, which include "faked to your fucking face like she couldn't see a corpse that was obviously there"

I SAID I THOUGHT SHE WAS GASLIGHTING HARROW

gideon is very determined to fix all of this diplomatically

by beating the crap out of her

they start a banter that will be an incredibly entertaining thing to witness for the next pages

I can't make it justice in a recap tbh

I was just basically like

gideon will, in a very persistent way, throughout the conversation, tell yandere twin that harrow will never love her

yandere twin wants to give gideon funny nicknames, like who would do that, that's so disrespectful, I can't even fathom doing that at all

not to gideon, anyway

yandere twin says that mercygirl disappeared, augustine dropped out and gideon the first is trying to handle the stuff on his own, kinda?

she's surprised by the fact that mercygirl tried to kill harrow

"why did you ascend to be a lyctor?" "ultimate power���and posters of my face" "Fair"

they find augustine being useless in a hallway and, when he sees gideon's eyes, he panics and bolts out of there

these lyctors are all a joke istg each and every one of them

except for, I think it was cassiopeia, who had the ceramics collection, she's fine

well no, I don't condone planet murder for ceramics, but she gets a bit more points than the rest for them

there's a lot of talk about buttholes between gideon and yandere twin and I'm not above that, since I've been making bolthole jokes this whole time

gideon is living for the nudes in yandere twin's room

nobody is surprised about that

but there's no time to think about the nudes or buttholes anymore when yandere twin pulls out a harrow letter for gideon

gideon is going through it even before opening it, as are we

she finds her glasses and a note that says

"one flesh, one end"

"Fuck one flesh, one end, harrow" "Because all I ever wanted you to do was eat me. Which is, coincidentally, what your mother said to me last night"

always so poetic, ortus can't even get close to this level

gideon keeps telling yandere twin that she has no chance with harrow

"I hated those eyes in her face; I kept expecting to smell hair gel."

chad catching strays at every turn, I live

gideon explains about harrow being in love with ice cube barbie

"I know the signs of Nonagesimitis"

and yandere twin goes "All that fuss about the Saint of Duty. What a little hypocrite"

which I guess is because of the whole gideon the first and not!dulcinea thing? but that's like totally different form whatever this is???

there are layers to the corpse and lyctor relationships, you guys

it's a very wide spectrum

gideon says that her connection to harrow has to do with her being her cav which...ok, gideon

"Nonagesimus, you hating me always meant more than anyone else in this hot and stupid universe loving me. At least I'd had your full attention"

gideon rn:

yandere twin isn't deterred by all of this information and thinks harrow and her have an eternity to bond because they're lyctors

as if they weren't doomed right now but ok girl, go for your dreams, I guess

gideon threatens yandere twin not to be nasty with harrow and to get away from her with her nasty necro ways

yandere twin goes "What can I say, I love a little gall on gall"

which absolutely wins gideon over for a sec

"Reverse everything I just told you. Let's get married"

I knew the horny puns would help them bond

it's the little things sometimes that bring us all together

yandere twin says chad used to say she would "go to hell and get fucked" and you know what, fuck that guy

this is why he's still catching strays on a regular basis 9 months later

yandere twin wants to take gideon to see dr reverend emperor john

gideon goes "No, thanks. I'm good"

that's what I would have said, I approve

but she has no choice, because harrowcita is still gone and whatever's going on is ??????

so, out she goes to follow yandere twin to see this asshat

who maybe will, at the very least, give us a little more info on gideon's demigod status

fingers crossed

hope he dies

And that's it for this update!!! It's a short one but we're moving forward!!!

[balrogballs]

I am feeling an intense craving to read a good ensemble fic about Arwen and Aragorn's wedding please let me know if there is one and if not someone needs to write it before I do because the literary-comedic potential of the setting is simply immense.

Like you have A&A obviously fulfilling their romantic destiny etc etc, but the ensemble! You could have Gimli and the dwarves running a mildly bitchy yet incredibly funny gambling ring! Elladan and Elrohir getting their hands on a caseful of edibles trying to re-enact the plot of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas! The twins linking up with Merry and Pippin and getting done for whatever is the Gondorian equivalent of accidental terrorism!

And of course, poor Elrond who apparently got the wrong memo and "accidentally" came dressed for a funeral! Bilbo also turning up confused as all hell and dressed in all black because it seems Elrond also told him it was a funeral! Elladan and Elrohir being commanded by the bride to distract their father so he doesn't start crying into the appetisers!

Legolas coming dressed in all white (canon!) on purpose just to fuck with the guests and telling everyone he's the bride! El-twins standing up during the "does anyone object to this union" bit and yelling out "INCEST! BARE FACED INCEST IN THE HOUSE OF ELROND!"

Arwen and Aragorn trying to take them to task for it before they point out that it did manage to distract their father, who was no longer crying into the appetisers and instead making the rounds explaining to every single guest that it wasn't incest, that to call it incest would be like punching a monkey and calling it kinslaying, and that he was looking for mortal brides for his sons so please let him know if they know of any eligible ladies with a limited lifespan.

A TREASURE TROVE of opportunities I swear pls mine this cave and give me the big fat elven wedding I deserve to read about!

[lewkwoodnco]

Okay I’m just so proud of this edit I just havee to talk abt some of the scene choices hehe🙈🙈

Mon, pine - ngl i completely forgot this scene existed until I randomly stumbled upon it while looking for some other screencaps and thank god I did cuz it fits SO WELL??? Lucy’s possessed by Annabel who’s talking abt someone else obviously but just LOOK at Lockwood’s face half of him wants to snap Lucy out of it/make sure she stays safe and the other half is just mesmerised by the sight of her looking at him like that. And the dialogue??? YOU LOVE ME, DONT YOU????? And he so obviously does but can’t say it/ is too scared to and it’s frightening to see lucy like this but he can’t look away he’s drinking in the sight like a man starved 😭 just the juxtaposition of lovkwood’s pining and the cheekily on-the-nose ‘you love me don’t you’ line creates this delicious tension ARGH the writers were sick SICKKK for this

Tue, long - as soon as he first laid eyes on lucy it’s like he can’t help but let his gaze linger over her and even though she’s the candidate being interviewed the way he tries to impress her as he gives her the tour (the basement training area, the ‘high security’ storage room, her room in the attic) it’s like you can tell he’s already desperately hoping that she’ll join as if he’s longing for company like hers

Wed, ache - love is nothing if not pain like other than the obvious physical pain of being in such close proximity to a flare explosion etc bro is HURTING with regret for putting her (and george) in danger just cuz he insisted they take the case and now they’re in so deep and its all his fault but also he just wanted to fix the 62 sheen road fallout keep his agency open (it’s almost like he wants to prove to her that he/lockwood and co. is worth sticking with) but it’s all gone so wrong and he’s just drowningggg in physical and mental anguish only love can hurt/ACHE like this frfr

Thu, sigh - but at the end of the day lockwood is still a 16 ish year old boy who sucks at expressing his innermost feelings and doesn’t know how to deal with jealousy in any way other than being moody about it/suppressing it and this scene is like yea these are kids fighting ghosts night after night but for five minutes they get to be regular angsty teenagers and have the air between them hang heavy with unspoken words and it’s all so dumb and frustrating but also they’re teenagers what ELSE are they going to do HHHHHHH like look at his face!!! bro is befuddled. dumbfounded. bamboozled even. (what do you mean you’re going out with Kipps i thought we’ve been playing house tgt what)

Fri, lament - as funny as this scene is it’s oddly sweet how he’s ranting so openly to Lucy and like the way she tries to reason with him (he probably signed the same NDA we did) and he STILL stomps around throwing a fit aurgghh it’s so adorable just kiss already

Sat, crave - just look at him. bro is down bad for every single part of lucy it’s like he can’t get enough of her, he’s not even hiding it here like look at him watch her like she’s the most precious thing in the world ughhh

Sun, yearn - ooh this scene is like the breaking point of all the accumulated hidden feelings and thoughts between them and he’s messed up so badly atp even lucy is properly pissed (where’s that incorrect quote - my girl is mad at me I am going to KILL myself) but he’s just too paralysed by 16-year-old-boy syndrome to respond to her (tho he finally gets his head on somewhat right in the next scene) so he just stares at her and takes the scolding wondering how things got this bad when all he had done was care and love and yearn for Lucy (can’t you see his heart clawing out of his chest to get to her)

Also I think it’s so hilarious that in the scene in the top gif he’s talking to lucy aka the very person that has him BOOKED AND BUSY with longing 😭😭

a week in the life of London's youngest agency head (insp.)

[dr-spectre]

As someone who's been in multiple fandom circles and calls themselves a Splatoon fan, I've seen a lot of focus and discussion on "THE LORE!!" and "CANON!!!" and to be honest with you... it's getting really tiring and I think people are just WAY TOO obsessed with what a wiki or an intern at Nintendo says rather than forming their own perspective on events and coming to their own unique conclusions.

Now, I wanna say, if talking about lore and discussing which elements are canon or not makes you happy and you love talking about that, then that's perfectly okay. It's fine. It's not for ME personally because my focus on Splatoon is the gameplay, music and the storytelling chops of each Hero Mode.

Story >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Canon for me any day of the week i do not care.

Because, to get away from Splatoon for a second, for my Sonic fans out there, you remember when Sega and the people behind the show Sonic Prime said that it was canon to the mainline Sonic timeline? And if you said otherwise you were technically wrong because "oh Sega said this, so it MUST be true!"

........But then everyone said that Sonic Prime cannot be canon to the mainline Sonic timeline because it has a fuck ton of inconsistencies? Yeah.... funny. Basically, don't put a lot of focus into "what actually happened" and "oh this is what the multi billion dollar corporation said!" because there's always gonna be one guy out there that goes "um this information kinda fucking damages the story in a severe way." (And sometimes that one guy is me.... hehehehe....)

I could obviously talk about.... you know.... Hypno Callie again for the 50th trillion time.... (and i will)..... This bitch.... I wanna love you girlie i really fucking do but Nintendo and millions of people make it hard to....

Nintendo set up Callie's villain arc decently in Splatoon 1 with the Splatfest dialogue, the Squid Sister stories and the Sunken Scrolls, yet they ultimately damaged the progression of the arc by saying "nah fuck u she got kidnapped and brainwashed, removing all of her memories and free will because fuck telling a good story with satisfying set up and pay off that allows for character growth. Fundamentals of storytelling? What are those?" And it also destroyed Callie as a character by reducing her to an object that the player "must save from da evil Octavioooo" and "oh look at her! She put the stupid brainwashing shades onnn againnn!! such a dumb fucking moron dumbass piece of shit right guys?!? lmaoooooooooo!! explore the dangers of addiction and how you need to seriously change your life and be surrounded by those you love in order to change bad habits?? Themes?? PFFTTT! NAWWW! THAT'S LAMEEEE!! It's Callie! No one cares about Callie!! She's stupiddd!!!"

(I talked about Callie in a tumblr comment section one time and I got made fun of for by a guy way older than me. I love humanity.)

It also ruined DJ Octavio's character too because, if what Nintendo said is true about what he did then he cannot be redeemed in Splatoon 3. He cannot go back on the shit he's done. But they try to redeem him out of nowhere and now he's all chill with the New Squidbeak Splatoon and appeared in the Grand Fest.... Yet what he did to Callie which Nintendo loves to push is truly TRULY unredeemable and if that's the case then welp.... I call that bad writing, straight up. It's bad writing.

I really hate it when something happens in a story and you perceive it in a certain way where you feel like it elevates the events, but then the company behind the story chooses to pick the worst outcomes possible just because? And everyone rolls with it just cause? Ugh...

Lesson of today is, don't fucking listen obsessively to what a company says and suck it up. Consume media and come to your own conclusions on what happened. As long as you have tangible evidence to back up your claims you can make any interpretation you want to, whatever makes you feel happy bestie!

[moutainrusing]

marylily in canon!

Mary is only mentioned twice in canon (which offends me, Mary deserves so much more, the whole series needs more women rep) but it’s okay, fanfics fix that, and what’s even better are the details about the times Mary was mentioned...

In The Prince’s Tale, in book 7, in Snape’s memories, Lily tells him, “I detest Avery and Mulciber! Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev? He’s creepy! D’you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?”

Snape: “That was nothing. It was a laugh, that’s all—”

Lily interrupts, “It was Dark Magic, and if you think that’s funny—” (She never finishes what she thinks because Snape brings up what Potter and his mates get up to.)

Later on, when Snape’s waiting at the entrance to Gryffindor in order to apologise, Lily says, “I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here.”

What we can conclude from this is: Mary was a Gryffindor, a Muggle-born, Lily’s friend, and a practitioner of Dark Magic attempted to assault her. However, if Mary was only Lily’s friend, then why would Lily call her “Mary Macdonald” when discussing what happened to her with Snape? (I know this is probably the author telling the reader Mary’s full name, but still, in the context of the book, it wasn’t necessary for Lily to say Mary’s full name, nor was it necessary for the reader to know Mary’s full name.)

In the HP universe, characters call strangers or enemies by their surnames, and friends by their first names or nicknames, even in conversations with other people. The fact that Lily places weight on Mary’s full name signifies that Mary is important to her, that everything about Mary is worth noting, that Mary Macdonald is her full identity and should be respected. No one can take it away, especially not Mulciber after his attempted assault. In other books I’ve read, when characters place emphasis and importance on another character’s full name, they feel strong respect for them, they believe their name is a beautiful sound, or they’re in love with them. Lily takes the time to say Mary’s full name even in an argument with Snape, which reflects what she would do for Mary. (Which is a lot.) As a reader, one could read their relationship as a strong, healthy, respectful platonic bond. (Or, you know, lovers. But I agree, platonic relationships are superior.)

Next, Lily “came out because Mary” (lmao gay) anyway, the point is: Snape was obviously a sore topic for Lily, and in order for Lily to calmly see him without storming away, Mary would need to know her very well. She’d need to have Lily’s complete trust, they’d need to know each other inside out. Without upsetting Lily, Mary was able to get her to see Snape, which suggests Mary is smart, subtly manipulative, trustworthy, kind, loyal, and Lily’s best friend. Lastly, Mary was never on the list of people in the Order during any of the wars, which means she never joined or fought.

In conclusion, marylily is real, this is all the canon information we know about Mary, and Mary Macdonald is amazing, she’s a legend, I love her, you should love her. Thank you for reading :)

[twst-drabbles]

would Sebek's grandpa go catatonic seeing janitor in the modern day?

Hahaha I'd imagine that Baul has made his peace and fully accepted that he's never going to meet the Janitor again, so when he does see them again, he thinks they're simply a descendant of that human he has shared tender moments with, so he isn't outright judgmental of his grandson's human friend from college. Who's also a staff member and has not one lick of magic. But also, he's made it pretty clear to his family about his distaste for humans, so he has to keep his regular prickly composure of just, not verbally engaging with the Janitor.

But it obviously doesn't escape his family's eyes that his ears twitch every time the Janitor's voice can be heard nearby. And even bites a chuckle back into his throat when they say something snippy or funny.

Either way, something is clearly nagging at Baul, because the amount of similarities between his first human love and this Janitor just start cropping up and it bothers him. Are they mocking him? Is he a part of some cosmic joke that he's unaware of?

Yeah that Janitor isn't hiding anything, but they're also not outright saying anything because they just want to see how long it will take for Baul to connect the dots.

And when he does connect the dots, it's in the middle of a family dinner, probably something the Janitor says to Sebek and everything just clicked in Baul. Only then does he go catatonic, and he has to be helped to bed like he's aged another 500 years.

Janitor is having the time of their life. Baul is still so fun to mess with.

He will recover quicker than Sebek. Probably thirty minutes later and a talk must be had. Privately.

"So, does Sebek know that his grandpa's a hypocrite?"

"...I--"

"You sure taught him to be judgemental to humans, for someone that once so eagerly loved having my tongue in your mou--"

"MM-HM! ...you're right. I am, in fact, a hypocrite. A hypocrite that loved a human. A hypocrite that grew to resent humans, and even let those feelings taint those once soft memories he held so dear. Memories that regained their luster when his daughter nearly bit his head off for even suggesting her human husband wasn't worthy of her. And this hypocrite, standing before you with evidence of his mistakes still echoing in his bloodline, missed you all the same."

"...haha, glad to see you're living well enough to reflect on yourself like this. You have a beautiful family. Though, are you ever going to tell them that you once made out with human multiple ti--"

"I beg of you, have mercy on me."

[sky4cherry]

hi #1 bob sheldon defender

can you pretty please elaborate on what you think bob’s relationships with the other socs are ?

ok sooo sorry this took me so long but i am so incredibly ill and my brain is not doing its job 🙂‍↔️

putting this under ‘read more’ because this turned out long

bob and paul: they’re obviously really close!! i hc them both as being only children, which bob feels kinda different for since he’s grown up with chet and brill who both have 2 siblings each, and trip who has a brother. they definitely view each other as brothers, hence why paul was quite as fucked up as he was when bob died (also like to be fair he did watch it happen so there’s that too)

bob and cherry: guys they are so important to me,,, girlboss gf and girlfailure bf… obviously they are head over heels for each other, and cherry’s the only one bob is really vulnerable around, which makes it all that much harder when he’s been drinking. they both want to help each other get through the bad times, but they both know that it’s inevitable that bob’s going to get caught up in the social divide :( they are so important to me :( bob who doesn’t know how to comfort cherry about her parents arguing but really wants to try

bob and marcia: the idea of bob being very wary around marcia because he’s scared she’ll spread slander about him is so funny to me because she is only 3 apples tall!! you’re telling me you’re scared of her when she’s 3 apples tall and riddled with anxiety?? they’re close because they’re the two who are closest with cherry, so they spend a lot of time together, but bro is quaking in his boots because he’s so scared she’ll put the embarrassing shit she knows about him to use

bob and trip: dyslexic bob sheldon who claims he just ‘doesn’t get it’ when he struggles with homework, and trip who helps him out without making any jokes at bob’s expense. trip (in my head) presents as quite stoic on the outside even though he’s secretly silly, while bob is more outwardly silly, so they balance each other out. trip who knows the best out of all the guys that the fighting is worthless, but knows exactly why bob does it. and bob who knows trip doesn’t fully support the fighting, but encourages him to join in so trip can control something. they’re not the absolute closest of the bunch, but they are very important to me!!

bob and chet: bob sheldon who wreaks havoc on his parents to try and get them to parent him better, but he takes things far more seriously when chet is the one being ignored by his parents. bob who doesn’t let chet go a night sleeping at his own home unless it’s by choice, so he always fixes up the couch for him in case chet lets himself in while bob’s asleep. they’re close. they’re so similar in the way they’re treated by their families, and how they choose to cope with that treatment. i don’t think i can actually put into words how important they are to meee!!!

bob and bev: oh you thought he was scared of marcia? beverly jitney-bush is no man’s peace. they’re close in the way they argue a ton but it doesn’t change their dynamic at all! with bev constantly at brill’s, and brill living 2 doors down from bob, they spend a lot of time together! bob’s probably the most headstrong guy, while bev’s the most headstrong girl, so they’re both close and at constant odds with each other. i think they argue because they’re similar, but they know they understand each other well enough to know when they’re going too far.

bob and brill: childhood best friends type shit!! they’ve known each other since they were little kids, and brill’s always balanced bob out really well. when bob’s letting his emotions guide him, brill’s there to help him regulate himself. they’re pretty big opposites from each other, but it’s something that really comes in handy when one gets in a situation he’s not exactly equipped for, because the other will always come to his aid. all the more tragic considering bob and brill make direct eye contact when bob gets stabbed

[virtues-end]

It's funny to see people asking about how to get the Shea "kiss scene" because they didn't get access to it at all when I actually had the option on mine, but picked the other romance choice there. I mean, obviously not mocking people who didn't get it, it's just the parallels and differences between playthroughs that are funny to observe.

Even in a moment of confusion, my MC could never be SO bold. The touching was already more than he'd ever dare to do under normal circumstances. It's interesting though, because I did hesitate between these options for a moment, but then came to the conlusion that with my MC's personality, he probably - at least subconsciously - would fear Shea would hate him way too much if he kissed them. I mean, he trusts Shea, but this is still a bold thing to do - even the touching is - and while he doesn't have issues with his human OR his barghest form like other helvlings could nor does he find himself like "disgusting" or anything, he still doesn't think he truly deserves Shea I'd say. He HAS been told ever since he woke up that he is basically worth nothing after all, and that he is the one who brought what happened onto himself because of what he did before - and even if he doesn't remember it, he actually believes that and just feels awful in that regard.

I'm always endlessly fascinated (and curious!) hearing about people's playthroughs. Obviously, I'm pushing a certain narrative when it comes to the helvling, and how they might perceive themself... so I'm not surprised when people tell me that their helvling wouldn't initiate contact, or that they wouldn't act in a certain manner (flirting and the like), or that they might be repulsed or have an aversion to touch (which makes sense, given the character's history).

I try to account for all sorts of playstyles, which is why I often add options in which other characters take the lead (touching or kissing, or speaking for the MC, for example). And I also completely get it if a reader would be uncomfortable kissing or touching Shea in that scene (whatever the reason), which is why it is not at all 'required' for any future scenes with them.

[sleepyparalysisdmon]

SVT when you're distracted by him

Requested? Yes! (and they are still open!)

Genre: FLUFF. NOTHING BUT FLUFF.

Mercilessly makes fun of you - Jeonghan, Joshua, Wonwoo, Seungkwan

Is anyone surprised by this first one on this list? Probably not so we’ll get this out of the way lol. Jeonghan's very obviously the type to laugh at you when you trip over your own feet while looking at him. Of course, he’s helping you up, but not without a taunting, “I know I’m attractive, but come on.” Might even let you trip a few more times because he's equally entertained and touched by the effect he has on you.

Listen, I’m convinced Joshua is super cheesy, so when you trip over your own feet while looking at him, he’s helping you up with a “Falling for me already?” You scoff at him, but he thinks the way it flusters you is so cute. Another one that might let you trip a couple more times. 

Wonwoo pulls you out of the way as you almost run into a light pole while walking, looking kind of smug. “Distracted, huh?” Don’t bother objecting because he saw how focused you were on him. Don’t worry, the other two above might let you make a fool of yourself again, but Wonwoo will keep pulling you out of the way and keep you on your feet, even if you can tell he finds it entertaining.

Now for the exact opposite. Seungkwan will stop walking to fold in half, laughing hysterically. It might even make you a little mad how embarrassed you are and how funny he finds it, but between giggles he’s asking if you're okay and suggesting you look where you’re going. 

Totally oblivious/confused - Seungcheol, Woozi, Minghao, Vernon

Seungcheol’s got a new hair cut and you certainly complimented him already. When you trip over your own feet and blame him for it, he can’t help but be outraged, because what do you mean?? He didn't touch you!! When you say he looks too good and it's distracting, he does a little ‘oh’ and then gets a little smug. 

When you nearly run into something and dodge it, Jihoon asks if you're okay. You say something along the lines of, “I’d be better if they'd close the gyms.” Totally lost by what that means and hours later remembers that he was wearing a tighter shirt today. Huh, he’ll think. Maybe the workouts are paying off. 

You’ve dropped like five things this morning and Minghao’s starting to get kind of concerned. Are your hands okay?? He’ll ask. “Put some sleeves on or something, please,” you’ll beg. Does not understand right away because it’s hot out, what is he supposed to do?? But later he’ll feel a little smug about it, pulling out all of his sleeveless shirts. 

You bump into something and whine to Vernon. “Put those big brown eyes away, man!!” Blinks said big brown eyes at you in total confusion. “But I need to see where I’m going,” he’ll say blankly. Totally lost when you walk ahead of him, claiming you can't bump into or trip over anything anymore. Maybe, perhaps, likely will never get it. 

Equally distracted - Jun, Hoshi, DK, Mingyu, Chan

I promise this is not a cop-out. I genuinely believe all of them are also tripping over, running into, and dropping everything because they’re equally distracted by you. A clumsy couple!!! My favorite!!!!

[uceyliyahh]

UNDER YOUR TOUCH

Summary: After her difficult breakup, Tiana wanted to start anew with her life. That's when she realized her life would be better when she met him.

This fanfic is 18+! NO MINORS ALLOWED

word count: 2957

smut warning; it’ll come in the story randomly so PLEASE PLEASE look out for it I’m not really good at writing ✍🏽 smuts but I’m improving at the moment.

Jey Uso x Tiana

AWFUL GRAMMAR IM GETTING BETTER I SWEAR LOL.

comments, likes, repost are appreciated I would love the constructive feedback in what area I need to approve in. 🤍

ALSO! I don’t not want nobody stealing my fanfics or take it as theirs that will be an issue fasho so keep it cute respectfully.

I only own my OC along with the make up scenarios

But I’ll be writing along the way since this story is in my drafts on Wattpad right now so yuh. 💁🏽‍♀️

TAGS ⬇️ lmk if you wanna be tag 🏷️@pinkwithhearts @420days @jstarr86 @empressdede @angiedawn02 @biancasreign

@punksyeet @bebesobrielo @aikosilo @hunnidmilly @zillasvilla @fearlesschimera @xbriexx @lov3rla03 @bloodlinesbabe93

@charmed-dreamssss @yana3sworld @partypoison00 @magnificentbouquetmusic @mselenalovebug @skyesthebomb

XX.

TIANA I am 37 weeks pregnant and will meet my baby girl, Gianna, in just two months. Jey was thrilled to hear that we were expecting a girl because he had always desired a girl child.

Before this baby popped out of me, I was at Trinity's house with the girls organizing the baby shower. We were choosing the colors and patterns for the cake and decorations.

Since the boys were more robust than us anyhow, we planned to have them remove the tables and other items. I felt my phone buzzing in my pocket while we were doing that, so I took it out to see that his mother had texted me.

Mama Talisua 🫶🏼 sent a message. IMESSAGE 💬

mama talisua🫶🏼: hello! My daughter-in-law, I just wanted to know what to bring for the baby shower this weekend.

Tiana: Heyy! Mom, you can bring some gifts and some food we need all the food that we can get 😭 mama talisua🫶🏼: don't worry honey I got yall I just can't wait to see my grand baby Tiana: me too mom, me too. mama talisua🫶🏼: tell my son to answer my calls also dear! Tiana: will do 🫡

After texting his mother, Trinity showed me some more ideas for the baby shower. I wanted to go with a white and pink theme so everybody could look pretty in all white or pink.

While we were doing that, I felt Gianna kicking me in the stomach, which always felt funny to me, feeling her little kids in my tummy.

"Oh my goodness, is she kicking?" Trinity asked as I nodded my head.

"Yeah, she is most definitely kicking me like crazy down there." I said, poking at my tummy, curious as to what she was doing in there.

"Girl I still can't believe Joshua knocked you up." I chuckled a little bit while rolling my eyes at her.

I couldn't believe it either. I thought I was going to be stuck with Malakai's ass forever, but I was wrong about that, and I found someone better who loves me and would never want to hurt me. I told Trinity and Bianca about what theme I was going for, for the baby shower, which they obviously loved the idea of being white and pink.

"Yes, that's so perfect, especially since the venue is kind of big just to host a baby shower," Bianca said.

"Ouuu girl, I cannot wait to see you and Joshua's photoshoot pics together. Isn't that today?" I nodded my head while rubbing my tummy.

"It's today. I just have to wait for him to get off of work so that we can go," I replied, feeling Gianna's little feet kick me.

They both nodded their heads at me as we continued to explore more themes for the baby shower.

zillafatu replied to your story: nah fr tho little one is ready indeed she's not playing around 😭 biancabelairwwe replied to your story: NIECEY POOH COME ON OUT SO TETE CAN SEE YOU trinity_fatu replied to your story: girl your tummy is so big romanreigns replied to your story: can't wait to see babygirl rikishi replied to your story: ♥️ jonathanfatu replied to your story: I still can't believe he knocked you up bro 😭

✧.* JEY I was getting off of work and heading towards Trinity and Jon's house to get Tiana so that we could do this photoshoot together. I am so excited to meet my baby girl soon. I already know that she's been kicking her mother in the stomach like crazy.

I felt more in love with Tiana, especially during sex, too. It's best to say that pregnancy sex is the best thing ever.  As I was on the way towards their house, I saw that Kehlani Hoe ass had texted me, probably seeing what Tiana had posted on her story. I kept Kehlani blocked, but she'll just come up with new accounts on IG, as she's just being a stalker at this point.

Kehlani sent 3+ messages IMESSAGE 💬 Kehlani 🙄: are you fucking serious right now Jey? Kehlani🙄: you got this bitch pregnant before me? Kehlani🙄: I thought this was suppose to be us baby? I said I was sorry for cheating on you in the past we can work things out like c'mon yall don't have to get married 🥺🥺

When I read the messages, I rolled my eyes while scoffing at the fact that she is delusional and thinks that I'll just take her back in a heartbeat when I'm already with someone who I want to be with.

She can go cry to that lame ass boy Malakai while he in jail for what he had did to Tiana for all I care, I only care about Tiana and our babygirl Gigi.

Joshua: Lani imma need yo' ass to stop blowing up my phone like we are together when we ain't. Kehlani🙄: Jey c'mon I miss you Joshua: well I don't Lani I'm becoming a father now and ion' need yo' bullshit when I got better things to be worried about. Kehlani 🙄: fuck that Tiana bitch! She doesn't deserve you! Joshua: and you think you do? Girl if yo' ass don't stop playin' on my fucking phone dawg like fr Kehlani🙄: I can do better Jey better than her Joshua: Blocked.

I blocked her number while making a turn and continuing on towards the house; this girl got a lot of confidence in herself right now, playing on my motherfucking phone with allat bullshit.

I finally made it to the house, turning off the ignition in my car before heading up towards the door. I knocked on the door, waiting for one of the girls to come open, and heard footsteps approaching.

The door flew open, and I saw Bianca standing there, including Tank and Marley, coming up to me and showing me some love before I came inside the house. Bianca shut the door behind us, and my eyes scanned for Tiana, but she was nowhere to be found.

"Tiana's in the bedroom sleeping, " Trinity said as I nodded my head while going upstairs to the guest bedroom.

When I went inside the guest bedroom, I could see her sleeping soundly. I quietly walked towards her, sitting next to her on the bed. I moved her hair to the side, admiring her beautiful features and curious to see what our little bundle of joy would look like more.

I caressed her cheeks as she shifted in her sleep, seeing her eyes flutter open, looking towards me with a faint smile.

"Bubba, you're here. Is it almost time to go?" she asked in a husky tone.

"Yeah, mama, c'mon. We gotta get ready for our photoshoot," I said as she whined like a baby, which I found adorable.

She managed to get up with my help so that she wouldn't fall. We walked downstairs, seeing the girls staring at us with a smile.

"Y'all are just the perfect couple like I'm so happy for you bestie." Bianca said.

Tiana smiled at them before we bid our goodbyes and headed out toward the photoshoot location. Tiana and I walked toward my car while I opened the door for her, running back towards my side of the door and opening it while getting in.

We buckled our seatbelts while heading towards the place, listening to some music on Tiana's playlist. She always had some good music to vibe to while in the car.

I looked over towards her, seeing her falling in and out of sleep. So I placed my hand on her belly bump, rubbing it, feeling Gigi's kicks coming from her tummy.

We finally made it to the place. As I took off my seatbelt, seeing Tiana sleeping soundly, I gently shook her as her eyes fluttered open. Darting her eyes toward my direction while stretching her body, I shook her gently.

"Hey, sleepyhead, c'mon, let's go in so we can get ready, love," I said as she nodded her head.

✧.* After our photoshoot, I took Tiana back to my crib and decided to cook us something to eat since I didn't want her to be on her feet as much. As I was cooking us something to eat, I peeked at her lying down on the couch watching TV, laughing at the girls fighting.

'Ion know why she watches this shit.'

I smiled to myself and rolled my eyes as I prepared something easy and nutritious for Tiana because she was genuinely unable to eat anything or her sweets. Tiana was a better cook than me, so she could actually throw it down in the kitchen. I made us some salmon with mashed potatoes and broccoli, and it smelled good coming from the kitchen.

As I carried our plates into the living room, after I finished preparing our meal, I got a drink for us. Tiana was sitting up and licking her lips at the food when I looked at her. 

"This looks so good, Bubba." Tiana said as she smiled at me.

"It's not better than what you cook, love, but thank you. I didn't want you to be on your feet." I said.

We began to eat our food together while putting on Friday. Tiana put her feet on my legs, getting comfortable while eating her food.

"Have you all decided what colors to have for the baby shower this weekend?" Tiana nodded as she reached for her phone, which was next to her.

She showed me some ideas for the baby shower, with the theme of white and pink, which I really liked because it meant I could go all out with our outfits.

"I love this idea, baby. You're going to make me go all out for this, " she chuckled at me while placing her phone down next to her.

We got done eating our food together as I grabbed both of our plates going to wash them in the sink; that's when I felt Tiana wrap her arms around my waist—causing me to turn around seeing her staring up at me with those innocent eyes that got her ass pregnant in the first place.

I placed my hands on her belly, bending down to give it a kiss while talking to Gigi, letting her know that Papa and Mama were waiting for her to come out so we could see her. I felt her little kicks in her mother's tummy, which made me chuckle a little.

My eyes darted back towards Tiana's innocent ones. I placed my hands on her face, bringing her closer to mine while kissing her lips.

"God, you're so perfect, T." She gave me a few pecks on the lips while our foreheads touched each other.

For some reason I just wanted to devour her right there because of them eyes she had it was like pulling me in, I didn't waste no time taking her upstairs to our bedroom.

✧.* SMUT WARNING Jey had you on your side due to your belly as he pounded his dick inside of you, making you feel so full more than ever. You couldn't lie that you did enjoy pregnancy sex but were also worried about the baby.

Worried that his dick was poking onto the babies heard but Jey reassured you that yall little girl was okay. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head while your mouth parted.

He pushed his dick deeper inside of you, causing you to gasp softly while maintaining eye contact with him. Jey loves the way you were looking right now, just all miserable underneath him, letting him do whatever to you because that's your soon-to-be husband, of course.

He firmly grabbed you by the throat beating your super wet cunt in, causing you to whine.

"Fuckkk Josh..." you moaned. You never felt so full, especially when it came to him. He always made you feel good whenever.

Jey felt your walls clenching around him, causing him to let out a groan escape from his lips.

"C'mon mami, you gotta let daddy stretch his pussy out ight?" He continued to give you deep strokes while leaning forward towards you, placing a kiss on your soft lips.

Tiana loosened up a bit for him, letting him be in control. Normally, he would let you be in charge of things, but since you were pregnant, you didn't really want to do a lot of moving around that would instantly get you tired.

Jey was going In deep like he was in the ocean, your ocean to be exact, as he circled his hips, hitting your spot while your eyes were going into your skull.

"Give me this pussy mama, give it to me, watching yo' pretty ass take this dick." He whispered in your ear.

You took all it, causing you to feel like you were on cloud nine right now with him doing this to you, especially while you were pregnant. His groans, mixed with your moans, filled up the bedroom, along with the skin slapping that sounded out the room.

"Joshhhh shit." You whined into his neck as you felt a pit go down her stomach. You felt overwhelmed by this, and your legs were trembling underneath him.

He wanted her to feel every inch of him as you couldn't handle it anymore, so you tried to push him away by his stomach, but he wouldn't let up as he moved your hand away from his stomach.

"Don't do that baby. Be a good girl fo' me and take this shit I want you to make a mess on me." Jey rubbed his thumb over your clit causing you to twitch a bit.

He continued to firmly grip your throat, not trying to hurt you, as you felt your toes curling while his strokes got sloppier and sloppier.

He watched your facial expressions turn up while having a grin on his lips, watching you fall apart. You let out a loud moan, feeling your body shaking violently as you came all him along with tears streaming down your face.

Your breath felt shaky, and your chest heaved up and down, but he didn't care right now because he wasn't done yet. Even if you tapped his shoulder to signal him to slow down, he shook his head, refusing.

"Fuck that you better take this shit." He growled, determined to get his nut after yours.

Cursing under his breath as he continued to give you his strokes while his sweat was dripping down from his body, feeling his dick twitch inside of you.

After a few more thrusts, he let out a satisfying groan escape his lips while filling you up, making sure you got all of his warm seeds inside of you as he pulled out of you, watching it dripping out of you.

SMUT OVER.

Tiana and I were breathing heavily as I saw some tears coming from her face I leaned in forward kissing her lips to calm her down.

I wiped her tears away from her face as she stared into my eyes deeply, I massaged her thighs making her feel at ease due to them shaking violently.

After our little session, we laid down in the bed together, with her cuddled up in my chest. We both continued to watch the rest of Friday together, laughing and enjoying the movie together.

My hand was rubbing against her tummy, feeling Gigi's kicks as she put her hand on top of mine.

"I love you so much Tiana, and I love our little angel." I said.

Tiana smiled at me while placing a kiss on my lips, "I love you more, Bubba; I appreciate you so much. Even when I was dealing with Malakai's ass. You were always there for me." She wasn't wrong I knew she was the one for me when she walked into my tattoo shop I do appreciate Bianca for recommending her my shop.

If she hadn't, I wouldn't have met Tiana at all, and I would probably still be dealing with Kehlani, but now I have someone that I am calling my wife.

"You know I am here for you forever baby." I said, kissing the palm of her hand.

We continued to watch the movie together before drifting off to sleep. I can't wait for this baby shower this weekend.

Under Your Touch.

uceyjucey, romanreigns, zillafatu and others liked your post.

tianasworld: mommy is waiting for you Gianna. 🩷 uceyjucey: god you're so beautiful baby 😩 tianasworld: @ uceyjucey all yours baby fasho 🥰 romanreigns: love yall zillafatu: aye we are goin to come see yall T. 🫶🏼 tianasworld: @ zillafatu can't wait to see yall too. biancabelairwwe: omgggg i love this 🥹🥹 rikishi: ♥️ theylovelani: ....tf bro...

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tianasworld, biancabelairwwe, MontezFordWWE and others liked your post.

uceyjucey: my two beautiful blessings 🫶🏼🤍 tianasworld: I love it here 😩😩 uceyjucey: @ tianasworld I do too mama 🫶🏼 biancabelairwwe: I LOVE THIS FOR YALL LIKE OMG 🥺🥺 uceyjucey: @ biancabelairwwe thanks sis ♥️ MontezFordWWE: I see you uceeee look at yall mane trinity_fatu: LOOK AT YALL BRO THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL jonathanfatu: I'm happy for you brother like fr fr got me tearing up and shit uceyjucey: @ jonathanfatu get yo' emotional ass outta my comments 😭😭 I'm playing. theylovelani: WHAT THE FUCK? tianasworld: @ theylovelani oops sorry little mama he's mine now should've done better to keep him. 🤭🤭

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A/n: sigh I am happy for Tiana fr fr she did it, she gotten out of an abusive relationship and found herself a fiancé I know Kehlani is crashing the fuck out right now and  Malakai in that jail cell.

But also I'm sad that this book is almost over with so y'all better be ready for that.

Anyways I hope yall enjoy this chapter lmk in the comments below.

Stay Ucey.

[sanriotraffy]

Vanilla Perfume

Zoroxreader- no warnings only fluff <3

Zoro is not weak. In fact he’s far from weak, he’s wayyyy too strong. But every strong man has its weakness, and Zoro’s weakness was your perfume. That damn expensive signature perfume you’ve been wearing since before you first joined the crew. A vanilla scent, not your boring average vanilla scent but a superior, warm, spicy, and sweet vanilla that haunts Zoro. One whiff and he’s on his knees ready to worship and pray to the owner of the scent, which is obviously you.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going out?” Zoro was pissed. Pissed because you both had agreed on staying in the Sunny and watching a movie with some food from a nearby restaurant and obviously some booze (and hydrating facemasks too). But when Robin pointed out that the island has some of the best night life in the world you knew you had to have a girls night even if Zoro got mad at you for ditching plans after he ordered food and found a movie.

Did you feel bad? Yea, but if you didn’t go out tonight you’d regret not going. So you did what you had to do. Get ready with the girls and escape while Zoro napped. And maybe you added something to his booze so he would sleep longer. Just because you’re a loving girlfriend it doesn’t mean you can’t commit pirate acts against your man.

“You’re such a bad girl you know, Zoro is gonna wake up pissed when he wakes up and doesn’t find you anywhere” Nami laughs, wasted. “Oh, I will be fine don’t you even worry girl, I have my ways” You replied sloppily, twice as wasted as her. “Oh, and speaking of the devil” Robin spoke pointing to Zoro, who was making its way to your table thru the crowd.

“Let’s go” he spoke when he finally got to you. “But I’m with the girls. The fuck?” You were giving him unnecessary sass that he didn’t appreciate at this moment. He rolled his eyes and told you to get up but you refused again which made Robin (the most sober out of the three) burst out laughing. Zoro rolled his eyes at her, it’s not even funny.

Eventually Zoro won, and got you to leave the bar with him. You were too drunk and sleepy to complain at this point. “Zorooooo, pleaseeeeeeee I’m sorryyyyyyyyy” you apologized to him as he ignored you the whole walk back to the ship. “You think a simple apology is enough after you cancelled our plans after I bought the food you wanted and the movie, and you cancelled without telling me, you just snuck off and lets not forget about the fact that you literally drugged me like I’m your enemy or something” he was mad, he had the right to. “Im sorry baby” you got closer to him eventually wrapping your arms around his waist and looking up at him with the prettiest eyes you can give him. “We haven’t had a girls night in so long, just us, the girls” you pouted at him. He just stared fighting his inner demons. You knew he smelt you, you knew he smelt the lethal perfume combo you chose today. The best vanilla scents in your collection + vanilla honey hair perfume, oh Zoro is a dead man.

“You know you’re getting away with so much shit because you smell so good and I don’t think it’s fair” he complained. You just giggled. “It’s my magic”

———

But wearing the same scent every day gets boring sometimes. “Baby I’m back!” You climb onto the crowns nest to show Zoro a haul of all the stuff you bought at the new island they arrived at. And as soon as you entered a new scent invaded Zoro’s nose. A pleasant sweet cherry scent with a familiar vanilla scent. The smell of an angel to him but a simple good perfume layering to you. “What took you so long?” He dramatically drops the dumbbell he was using to turn to you with a frown. You don’t care that he pretends to be annoyed with you as you cover his face in kisses with the new lipstick you’ve gotten at the store. “This store I went to had a variety of perfumes I had to smell every single one, AND I restocked on my signature scent as well” You kiss the perfume bottle showing it off to your still “annoyed” man.

“We were supposed to go watch that movie with the princess and the knight. You took way too long I had to go with the cook. It was embarrassing but I didn’t want that ticket to go to waste” he grumbled. You laughed. You knew that he liked spending time with Sanji (sometimes), even if he refused to admit it. They’re basically besties.

“Oh yea, well let me make it up to you baby” you stand on your tippies wrapping your arms around his sweaty neck and start kissing it. “Cant. Working out” he says but does nothing to stop you. It’s hard to resist you, specially with that new perfume. “But Zo-“ he couldn’t play it cool anymore. The cherry-vanilla scent won, meaning you had won, meaning you got your way again. Damn woman.