I'm not even a minute in apology tour and I already want to give up watching it. But ig I'll keep going, live reaction under the cut!
Ew can they stop talking about sex. I hate Stolas' victim mentality so much. Blitzo had every right to lash out at Stolas and yet Stolas is the victim. Can they stop trying to make Stolas the victim here.
"I don't look down on you!" YES TF YOU DO I MADE A WHOLE POST ON HOW YOU LOOK DOWN ON HIM STFU! YOU DO THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN HIM! YOU ALWAYS LOOK DOWN ON HIM ALL THE TIME!
Why is Blitzo made the villian for making Stolas uncomfortable when Stolas made Blitzo uncomfortable for so much longer?
I'm so glad to see Blitzo lashing out at Stolas even if he's demonized for doing so.
"I don't owe you dick!" YES YOU DON'T! GO BLITZO! YOU DON'T OWE HIM ANYTHING!
Why do the human disguises even matter? Blitzo straight up said that it was his face.
I love Verosika but I don't want her to become a Stolas Stan. She actually has a REASON for hating Blitzo. Stolas doesn't. I wish she knew the whole story.
Oh god don't sing Stolas don't sing don't sing- FUCK HES SINGING. Another pity party so Stolas I assume? Yep. Its another pity party for Stolas of fucking course. Stolas kindly stfu <3
STOLAS STOP PLAYING VICTIM YOU ARENT THE VICTIM HERE!
"There is a crowd here full of people who care so much that they throw an entire party about hating you every year. Do you know how much you have to care to do something as stupid as that?" SHUT UP
STOLAS STOP WITH YOUR RANT YOU HAVE A DAUGHTER THAT CARES IF YOU STAY OR LEAVE AND WANTS TO SPEND TIME WITH YOU JUST SHUT UP! GOD YOUR FUCKING VICTIM MEANTALITY
Blitzo trust me you can do much much MUCH better than Stolas. But can you stop being a dick to Verosika? She has every reason to hate you. ALSO STOLAS IS PLAYING VICTIM AND WANTS SYMPATHY NOT BLITZO.
Wow ok. I will admit Verosika and Blitzo have a moment is nice. But then it got ruined by gross kissing. And then Stolitz which is ✨️disgusting ✨️
BLITZO ISNT THE ONE THAT NEEDS TO CHANGE FOR STOLAS THEY SHOULDNT EVEN DATE
Final rating: 2/10 The only redeeming qualities is the nice song at the end and Verosika and Blitzo having a moment was nice.
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𝙸𝚏 𝚋𝚜𝚍 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚝:
The “Chuuya shoots Dazai” scene
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Chuuya: this is probably the gayest scene we’ve done… Asagiri! What are even doing anymore!?
Asagiri: making the audience suffer— I MEAN, we need drama.
Dazai: uh huh…
Fyodor: nah fam, y’all two have done gayer shit.
Yosano: “you used corruption believing in me? How beautiful…” you two made that scene so much gayer than it was intended.
Ranpo: WHERE IS ED?!?!?!
Nikolai: Yo, Fedya! You got the garlic breath and pecans?
Fyodor: yup! You got the knives and water?
Nikolai: mhm!
Yosano: tf is yall about to do…?
Fyodor: Dawg, Our business, is our business so kindly kys.
Ranpo: DID NO ONE HEAR ME?!?!
Dazai: yall here sum’ ?
Chuuya: Nah, I think I still got some water in my ear from when we were supposed to drown me and Fyodor.
Higuchi: I can smack your gay ass upside the head if you need?
Chuuya: where tf did you come from?!
Higuchi: My dead mother, NOW WHY THE FUCK DID YOU TAKE MY SHERBET?!?!
Gin: uh, that was me, my bad fam.
Higuchi: I’m telling your brother you have a boyfriend.
Gin: BRO WHAT?! IM INTO GIRLS TF
Higuchi: get me new sherbet then
Gin: no, tf? It’s like 3 bucks, you’re not broke.
Mori: both of you stfu before I take away your crowns.
Gin: whatever
Higuchi: *rolls eyes*
Fukuzawa: Mori, your daughter is trying to break into the alcohol room again.
Mori: Motherfuck— ELISE ELORI ANYA, WHAT DID WE TALK ABout………slowly fades from the room
Kunikida: has anyone seen Katai? We were supposed to go to the new cafe later but I can’t find him.
Nikolai: I saw him by the cameras, I think he was trying to fix it or smth, idfk
Kunikida: Thanks Kolya—
Fyodor: Oi! Watch it Kunikida, only I can call him Kolya.
Kunikida: I get it Fyodor, you’re in love with Nikolai but that doesn’t mean you need to be such a simp.
Fyodor: I am not—
Chuuya, Dazai, Yosano, Higuchi, Gin: Yes you are.
Kunikida: you’re lucky he’s not paying attention, as usual.
Fyodor: alright stfu. Kolya, let’s head out for now, we still got an hour before we gotta be back.
Nikolai: ‘ight, Let’s get boba!
Fyodor: whatever you’d like, Kolya!
Dazai: Nah…they’re so gay for each other, yet too stupid to realize it.
Yosano: you can’t be talking, you’re just as stupid.
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Scene: Dead Apple, Chuuya’s gotta put his face in Dazai’s crotch—
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Chuuya, reviewing the script: *murmurs* then you lean your head close in Dazai's lap— I NEED TO DO WHAT?!?!
Dazai, sitting across from Chuuya: nah, wtf, BRO?!?! ASAGIRI, IM COMING FOR YOU TOMORROW.
Chuuya: There's no way I'm doing that! It's ridiculous!
Dazai: I knew I shouldn’t have agreed to do acting with you.
Chuuya: we are gonna be laughing the whole time— what is Asagiri trying to accomplish?!
Yosano, sitting beside Asagiri, handing him a container of random foods: thank you for doing this, they need to get their feeling together, so if this doesn’t work, I’m locking them in a closet until they talk shit out.
Asagiri, sipping on his soda: so, who should we do next?
Yosano: hm… how about my idiot brother Ranpo and his “best friend” Poe, they are so in love it’s unbelievable.
Asagiri: wait— they aren’t already together?!
Yosano: Nope! Sadly.
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Scene: Nikolai frees Fyodor and Dazai, then calls Fyodor his best friend.
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Fyodor: holy shit, holy shit, holy shit!
Sigma: Bro, you good?
Fyodor: fuck, fuck, FUCK—
Sigma: Uh— Fyodor? Yo! Russian rat bitch, Are you okay?
Chuuya: no, he’s not
Sigma: Why? Tf did Dazai do to him?
Dazai: I didn’t do shit!
Sigma: then why is dawg freaking out like his favorite drag queen just died?
Chuuya: you remember the part where Nikolai held his hands?
Sigma: yeah? Why?
Dazai: well, considering it wasn’t in the script, Fyodor wasn’t expecting his crush to grab his hands so now he’s freaking out.
Nikolai: is Fedya okay?
Dazai: oh he’s fine, he’s just having a gay panic right now.
Nikolai: uh, why?
Chuuya, trying not to laugh: Bro, Nikolai, you grabbing Fyodors hands wasn’t in the script so of course he’s flustered by you, you make him blush all the time.
Nikolai: I make Fedya blush?
Dazai: Every time you get close to him he blushes and is nicer to you than the rest of us, I think Fyodor has a crush on you, Nikolai. I know you like him too.
Chuuya: Dawg, don’t even try to deny it Nikolai, I’ve seen you two have a cuddle session in the break room, you and Fyodor may not be together but you are definitely in love.
Nikolai: ok look, yes, I’m in love with Fedya, but like hell I’m gonna say somthing. I’d rather not ruin what we have now.
Sigma: I’ll lock you two in a closet until you talk about your feelings.
Nikolai: uh— no?!
Chuuya: Nikolai, Fyodor is your best friend and you’re in love with him, he’s in love with you, it’s not that hard to figure out, so tell him you love him.
Nikolai: you have no room to talk, Chuuya, you’re also in love with your best friend.
Chuuya: SHH, he’s literally right there!
Sigma: I’m gonna lock you and Dazai in a closet to talk about your feelings, as well.
Chuuya: no, I’m good
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Scene: Tecchou fighting Kenji
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Kenji: Man, when we finish filming the show, I hope that Jouno gets to live in the end, then you two can have a lovers kiss!
Tecchou: Wait what—
Jouno:What?!
Kenji: oh, c’mon! You two have so much chemistry on screen!
Jouno: Kenji, there are no feelings involved for me and Tecchou, the show isn’t even a love story!
Kenji: With the way Asagiri has everyone acting in this, it’s basically a BL
Tecchou: Kenji, why do you know what BL is, aren’t you 10 or something?
Kenji: I’m 14, not 10, but still, even off cameras you two act like a married couple.
Jouno: we don’t act like a married couple.
Kenji:I could convince Asagiri to have you two adopt me in the show later…
Tecchou: No—
Jouno: just drop it, he’s not letting this go.
Tecchou: Whatever, let’s go back to the dorms.
Jouno: Mkay
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Scene: none, just them being dumbasses
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Higuchi, kicks the break room door open: if you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands.
Everyone:…
Higuchi: Damn, all y’all hoes depressed.
Q: you didn’t clap either.
Higuchi: SHUT THE FUCK UP—
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elise, trying to go with Dazai when he left the Mafia
Dazai:you can’t go…
Elise, still trying.
Dazai: no…I’m sorry, you can’t go.
Elise: fuck you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Gin, sitting on the steps to her apartment.
Some lady walking by: and they were roommates.
Gin: oh my god they were roommates.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elise: CHUUYA! Is that weed?!?!
Chuuya: no— it’s a crayon—
Elise: I’m calling the police!!!
Elise, types 911 on the microwave waves and they answer.
Chuuya:….
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dazai: you either buckle down and do your work or you’ll end up at McDonalds.
Q: we going to McDonalds if it don’t do my work?!
Dazai: No?!?!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kajii, poor a box of cereal in a bowl but lemons come out.
Kajii: welp, when life gives you lemons.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Chuuya: Q, let me see what you have!!!!
Q: A KNIFE!!!!
Chuuya: NO!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Ok now how do you all feel about Ronin?
LILY: hes a big butthead! its like he never waaants to do anything with us, as much as i try to say he should!! 3:
LILY: ill get there one day.
FATE: Well, no. I think he hangs out with me and Vera just fine, Lily. Your shitty 'activities' tend to be a little broken in logic and exhausting to keep up with.
FATE: Remember what happened last time you went behind my back and pulled some nonsensical codswallop?
LILY: i won, didnt i???
SETH: shut up about that! hes my arch nemesis.
LILY: oh!
SETH: yeah! he thinks hes super cool and invincible cause of his cool powers, and he just likes rubbing it in my face. he likes trolling me!!!!! we've been in a passive aggressive prank war for MONTHS now!
SETH: im still plotting to get back at him after the INCIDENT.
FATE: ...Should I ask?
SETH: nope! i dont want you working your freaky getting along magic on us. i have to handle this PERSONALLY.
DARIN: i like 'im?
CORA: Perhaps a little too much, hm, Darin?
DARIN: i know you tryna be funny an all by actin like i have some kinda crush on him but ill confirm it for ya and say yaint exactly wrong in this situation
DARIN: hes super funny and his eyes are pretty cant blame a guy for starin
DARIN: dont think we got the chemistry and he seems to rlly not like me mosta the time so i aint gonna push it
CORA: That's... completely reasonable, Darin. I apologize.
CORA: I was just trying to make you a bit uncomfortable, as I do. That's our routine.
CORA: But I'll respect your feelings. If you like Ronin, you are well within your right to feel that way. I think I'm just used to bullying Enzo about liking boys.
DARIN: i thank ya kindly for the understandin
DARIN: i kiss boys for a hobby im no 1 boykisser up in this house its all i do an think about
DARIN: girls sometimes too ;) whoevers got the guts and will to tame my sexy ass im up for
CORA: I believe you.
CORA: Now... Ronin, correct? I'm not exactly the best at expressing how I "feel" about people outside of a technical sense. He's our designated driver, if that means anything.
CORA: He buys us snacks and drives the group around. He's an essential part of the dynamic. Most of us are pretty happy to have him around.
NAHLA: Emo nerd! Did you know he plays fucking League???
NAHLA: He has the REDDIT APP on his phone. How am I not going to bully him for that??? Who's primary goddamn social media is REDDIT. And the league of legends. INEXCUSABLE!!!
NAHLA: I must admit he's not that bad aalllll the time. He can throw a mean punch.
NAHLA: Turns out watching him nearly kill someone forces some respect!!!
ENZO: you know i keep learning things about you guys and really worrying if i shouldve just not come to your table when you asked
ENZO: or like just stuck with fate or not come to lunch or something
ENZO: cause like he almost killed a man?? my babygirl the love of my life?
CORA: Enzo.
ENZO: its a joke stfu
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this is for the girls. non-women of this blog go away
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hey girlies, can i just say how fucking hot it would be if all three of us were on a crowded train together and i dipped my fingers down into your pants and started playing with you ;) and when you verbalize how you dont want to, other men start ignoring your pleas and touching your bodies until you two are left, the only two still on the train, naked and covered in semen until more arrive and more use you two sluts that would be hot as shit so why dont you two give me your location, all ill do is drug and rape you over and over again
You radiate 'I haven't touched grass(or talked to a woman) in years' vibe. Please stfu and leave us alone you sad, still-living-in-your-moms-basement, piece of shit. I bet you've never known the touch of anyone you disgusting fuck. Go away and search up the definition of consent. <3 Here, I'll help out: Consent
(P.S. this may be of use too! Grammar Help)
-Mod Ghostbur
Hey bestie boo-boo bae, this is very not slay of you :/. Ok but seriously the mods here are MINORS and literally most are non women so wtf did you think you could achieve from this? did you except them to go "Oh wow that sounds so hot papi anon my ip address is 1234.7539.go fuck yourself, please fuck me mhmm~!" because if you did expect that you better go back to first fucking grade and learn how rational humans react to that shit. (not that i would know *laughs in robot kin*). so yeah, go jump off a bridge p3do, rap3ist, slvt <3
ps. just say cum, its not that fucking hard dude, unlike you fucking freak when people degrade you ;) <33
-Mod Kurt (the BOYFRIEND of one of the lovely people you were talking to <333)
Hey worstie!! ♡ You're absolutely disgusting!! Please kindly never interact with any woman again, and perhaps go amputate your fingers as well to prevent further incidents ♡ If you want to please people, become a hermit with no internet! Trust me, everybody will like that :D
Now now, perhaps I'm being a bit too cruel here, after all this would only land you a couple lifetimes in jail ♡ so you should probably get comfy while you can! Thanks for the very obvious cry for help, maybe you could set up a GoFundMe to pay for your therapy bills? Just a thought tho!! Thanks for sharing xoxo
-Ethereboo
get well soon holy shit lmfao
-wren
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