#so i feel like they wanna just get rid of me

[ruinedporcelaindoll]

My life was stolen from me and it’s all my own fault, it was all because of my own karmas. I’m so miserable and I still get terrified when I remember most of the things that some humans made me go through. I’m 23 but feel like a 5 year old when I get flashbacks, I turn to unloved and lonely child, all of a sudden it’s just me and myself only, hiding under that computer desk subbing while looking out that little tiny window. That dirty dirty desk in that dirty house. Those dirty lies and dirty secrets and dirty silly desires of their own. How they destroyed so many people’s lives. when I remember about every part of my life, I cry my eyes out I cry so bad like I relive every dirty thing that Ever happened to me over and over and over again. Such a disgusting unwanted girl I am.

You’re both the same monster just with different characters, not just you two, but all of you five. And I’m like a miserable helpless weak animal who ruined my life trying to find a home in you all. And look I’m still stuck! I got rid of some of you, but I’m stuck with two of you. It has been more than 6 years and I’m still fucking stuck!!! Only because of my weakness. Cause I don’t wanna be alone in my mind and I hate meeting new people, i stayed in the same cycle because of this and I’m terrified that it’s how it’ll always be. What if I live a long life as well as you two? I’m gonna stay this miserable forever then, binding to one you each time. Such a weak disgusting girl. I hate myself.

What if 3 of us are live a long life? That sounds like a nightmare… please just die sooner or leave this country forever. Please I can’t keep living like this for years and years… for the sake of other girls for the sake of everyone, both of you please left this world sooner …

i mourn the person i never got to be

[wasyago]

hello! Im just wondering if there’s any side effects Etho has because of staying in the cave in trails gone cold au or did it just change his hair.

good question! probably? this hasn't really been discussed or thought through, so don't treat it as 100% true, just me thinking out loud.

❄️ talking visual changes, his hair and eyes changed color permanently, his skin is now paler, even if the effects lessened when he was out of the cave, nothing is fully reversible. i dont imagine there's a way to get rid of the sculk that is in his body already, because it's like- everywhere. in his blood, in his lungs, in his brain, in his bones. it's dormant and doesn't do him any harm, and maybe in 10 or 20 years his body will slowly get rid of it, but its an if not a when.

❄️ in terms of other changes... i imagine he's constantly freezing now, nothing ever helping to warm him up. his nervous system is messed up beyond repair, so he could probably shove his hand into fire and get burned and still be freezing.

❄️ he probably also always feels slightly feverish and weak? you know how when you're ill and you stand up to do something but standing up takes all your energy and you're too tired now? that kind of thing. he's just tired all the time.

and then there's also all the indirect changes?

❄️ he lost an eye. goodbye depth perception, and layered with his other changes he's probably very clumsy now.

❄️ i imagine his hands tremble more often than not, both because of the freezing and because of his strained psyche.

❄️ dude is like. traumatized. very badly. he decided to leave one of his closest friends to die so he himself could escape. his other closest friend was a better person than him but died because of it. he never said goodbye to any of them, he can never apologize. they're gone forever, and they're still down there. etho survived but at what cost and was it actually worth it?

❄️ i don't know if he feels any sort of calling from the cave, but maybe? maybe it's the sort of thing where he can't tell if it's his own thoughts or not, because it could be a cave trying to get him back or it could be his own wish to return in attempt to "fix it".

i also wanna say, poor gem. she has to take care of this guy now and im so sorry to her. it's gonna be a very long time until he even starts healing, and it's gonna be a very difficult time. there's like, so much to say about gem too, because she also lost two of her best friends and she wasn't even there to witness it, all she gets is her traumatized brother...

[smallestapplin]

helloooo!! can i request idw rung x human fem reader?? just fluff, maybe rung is exhausted from all the sessions and clients, and the reader is just there for him. Kinda like instead of rung giving out therapy, he's receiving therapy lolll

And this makes rung kinda emotional because like i said, he's always the one giving out therapy, and no one ever really cared about him that way

idk if u write for idw though i hope u do😭 have a nice day!

-🍓 anon

Thank you for requesting this, I wanna smother him in love so badly.

No warnings!

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Rung loves to help, the care he feels deeply for all on the ship is immeasurable, like a sire to their sparklings. He just wants to give them the tools to help themselves, to help them out of their depressions, to help manage their moods swings and out bursts.

To show them they aren't alone, and it's okay.

But some days take everything out of him, like learning something new in his clients past that just makes his spark break for them. Rung forgets himself, forgets that he too needs someone to lean on sometimes.

He didn't expect that support to come in the form of the human of the ship.

You knew he'd be back late and yet you still found your way to his habsuite, and stayed up waiting for him. You smile up at him, gentle and kind.

"Welcome back, you look tired, hon. C'mon, you need to lay down and relax."

He's not sure what made him break, your soft voice or your warm expression, but he could feel the fluid leaking down his face plate, fogging his goggles. He moved to you without a second thought, carefully picking you up and holding you close to his face plate as he lays down on his berth.

"I just want to help them."

His quaking voice breaks your heart.

"I know, Rung, I know. You have been doing so well. But you forget to take care of yourself, you can't help everyone if you're too tired." You try to wipe his tears, but there is just too much.

You nuzzle up close to him, offering some comfort to the large bot.

"You need someone to vent to, you need to take those stupidly long hot showers, read something new, you need time for yourself to recover."

When was the last time someone offered such support to him? Been there to let him cry and get it all out?

"You're a kind bot with so much love to give, but recovery isn't all work, you need to stop and just breathe in the moment, feel what you feel, and show it."

He lets out a watery chuckle.

"I know you're right, but I'm not pleased about it."

You playfully huff, "Well, now you just sound like Prowl being proven wrong."

Rung moves to lay on his side, curling around you in the process, keeping you close to him. He takes his fogged goggles off, setting them to the side, letting you see his pretty blue optics, but he looks so tired.

You place a hand on his cheek, rubbing soothing circles across his metal.

"You're a sweet bot, Rung, don't let these trying times ruin your compassion."

You nearly panic at how much he begins to sob, as if you broke the dam that had been cracking for so long, his cries were loud in your ears, but you never wavered in your comfort. You lay against him, kissing the digit of the servo that holds you.

he needs this, he's needed this for so long.

"It's okay, I'll stay by your side, always."

There isn't anything he wouldn't do for the crew, and there isn't a thing you wouldn't do for him. You let him cry as much as he needed until he grew exhausted, growing limp in the oncoming rest cycle.

He spoke up, his voice near a whisper.

"You'll stay here with me...right?"

You worm your way out of his servo and lay down next to his helm, his optics lazily following your every move.

"I'll be here when you wake up, you won't get rid of me that easily."

His smile, though tired, is just as sweet as always.

"Thank you."

"Anything for you."

You watch as his optics slide close, powering down to recharge. You will stay right here with him, right beside him no matter what, he's too kind to be left alone as is.

His berth isn't very comfortable for you, but you will ask for your bed to be moved here if he'd be okay with that.

Ah, you will worry about that in the morning, for now you just want to bask in his presence and enjoy this.

[indieyuugure]

Hi Indie !

First of all, I truly love your version of TMNT. Your dialogues are so good and the designs are great. In terms of writing it kind of reminds me of the Webtoon comic: Batman, Wayne Family Adventures in the way that it’s a brilliant take on a famous franchise.

Also, I kind of had a question and a request.

I noticed a change of style with the color scheme you have now compare to your previous sketches. Like before, Mickey’s stickers were colored and blood was red when those elements are now in black and white. My question is why the change ? Not that it’s a bad choice or it doesn’t fit in you aesthetic, I was just genuinely wondering😁.

As for my request, well I’m French and I really enjoy doing translation either from French to English or from English to French. Therefore I was wondering if you were okay with me doing a French version of your comics ? If you’re not, I totally understand so no worry😁

I can’t wait for the next chapter !!! I wish all the best !

Aw thank you so much! I’m so glad you love the art and the writing! I’ve never read that webcomic, but I’ve heard about it before! I’ll take it as a compliment! ^v^

That is an excellent question! Basically I wanted to reduce the colors on the pages to just the colors of one of the characters items.

I’ve actually been cutting down on color usage since TMS (April’s hair and Casey’s under shirt were colored red and mauve respectively in ROTP but not in TMS) since I felt that it made for some very odd color things, like it felt like too much color be stylistic, but too little to be fully colored? Idk I just didn’t like it, so in TMS every character was allotted two colors: one eye color and one outfit color. That made it a lot simpler and drastically decreased the feeling I had about the colors.

That reason is also why I cut Mikey’s sticker colors. I did think about it, but I decided against it because it felt odd to give Mikey three colors and everyone else one. He’s not the MC, so like, it just seemed like an odd design choice to continue with.

The removal of using red for blood is a bit more complicated. I actually considered making it red in Indie TMNT, but I ended up not because of a few reasons.

1: Red is Raph’s color, it should be used as such (every character only got one color anyway, reusing the color makes it feel less special that it’s there)

2: flushing, whether because of love or illness or embarrassment or whatever, was also being shaded with red because it’s caused by blood, and I just didn’t really like the way it looked? I dunno probably a personal thing? I won’t say why cause I don’t wanna put the thought in your heads, but specifically with Donnie’s face being red from his fever in TMS, I just didn’t like it.

3: I found that the color red makes wounds more graphic. Not sure why? I found with TMS I was having to censor Leo’s wounds more than I anticipated. They were originally so much more disgusting when the red was added that I had to add a lot more black to be comfortable with the drawing. I’m satisfied with my results, I think I struck a good balance, but it did kind get me thinking since I plan to make Indie TMNT just as gory.

Its original purpose for being added was because wounds were key plot points in both ROTP and TMS and I wanted you to pay attention to them and remember them. Now, that’s not to say they’re not important in Indie Tmnt, but I found with the increased violence I was adding (because murder is okay in this comic) it felt unnecessary. Almost every fight scene has splatters of blood that aren’t really that plot related, so it’s not the same as TMS which follows 2012’s no blood or injuries in fights rule until it’s shattered. So in addition to all the other reasons listed, I felt it was fine to get rid of the usage of red for blood and other injuries in this comic.

TLDR: I want each character’s color to be special and they only get one cause I’m lazy and I think it looks cooler. Red blood makes people squeamish but black blood doesn’t 🤷‍♀️ also less important in this comic

As for your request: YES!! I’m totally okay with it, you absolutely may! I would love that! However you decide to do it, just be sure you credit me as the original author of the comic and send me a link when your done so I can post it on the comic masterpost for anyone who wants the translation to read!

Good questions! :]

[mistriavalley]

Alex with an insecure chubby farmer (gn!farmer)

Note: Got this idea from @hermits-crab. I also had sm fun writing this! I struggle a lot with my own body image so writing these headcanons brought me some comfort :3

TW: negative body image, negative comments from the past, farmer is insecure, mentions of bullying from the past

Masterlist

Alex has never and will never give you any reason to feel insecure or self conscious about your body. He worships not only you, but the ground you walk on as well and he honestly would have never thought that you'd feel bad about your looks. You're perfect in his eyes. Godlike even

But while he rolls out the red carpet for you, you still can't help yourself. Alex is so athletic and fit and you feel like people are judging you for being on the bigger side. Of course no one has ever said anything regarding that in Pelican Town. On the contrary, when you confided in Haley she praised you and your figure

You still can't help, but to wonder what his friends in the city or from gridball practice might be saying when Alex shows them pictures of you though. Are they saying "you lucky bastard" or "as long as you're happy"? It's eating you up from the inside, but you don't wanna bother your partner with that

And when you guys go on a date or shopping in the city, do the people around you actually stare at you and whisper amongst themselves or are you just imagining it? Nevertheless, the thought alone that someone might be judging you makes you wrap your arms around yourself to hide

It takes an embarrassingly long time for Alex to notice anything and even then he only does, because it's painfully obvious in that moment. Like you're out on a beach date and you refuse to get out of your baggy t-shirt even though you're obviously suffering from the scorching heat. That's when it clicks inside his head and his heart breaks

He walks you back to your farm after the beach date and sits down with you to talk about it. He wants you to trust him with these things and for you to know that you can talk to him about anything. When he hears how worried you are about what others might think when they see "someone like him" with "someone like you" he grabs both your hands and squeezes them gently

After he asks why you'd worry about such a thing, you explain how you've gotten comments thrown at you in the past and how every single one stuck with you to this day. It makes him angry and he wishes he would have met you sooner so he could punch every single person who has made you feel bad

Alex knows what it's like though. His father has made him feel like shit his entire childhood, but you've helped him get rid of these negative thoughts and he wants to do the same for you. There is obviously no pressure, because he understands that you can't shake these chains off in one day, but he'll do everything to make you feel loved and appreciated

That evening and every single one afterwards, he leads you to bed where he showers every inch of your body with kisses and praises. Also due to him working out so much and his lifestyle in general, he knows a lot about the human body. So if you stumble upon a "fitness guru" online talking about how unhealthy it is to do this or look like that, Alex is jumping in immediately to correct the person before it gets to your head

"But my BMI-" "No. Don't. BMI is a faulty system in more ways than just one. I'm not in the green area either, because of the weight from my muscles."

Or when he notices that you refuse to get a second serving even though you're still hungry or when you decide not to order a desert when you clearly want one. "You have to eat if you're hungry, baby. You're doing hard physical work on your farm every single day and your body needs the energy."

"I've gained weight again..." "Baby, listen to me. I'm 100%- no 500% certain that those are just muscles. You're lifting, pushing and pulling stuff on your farm from morning to evening. It's fine. You are fine."

[5trawb3rry-m1lkk]

at uni i befriended a couple ppl but theyre all asian so sometimes we'll just be hanging out in a group and suddenly they just start speaking mandarin to each other so i just kinda stand there and then suddenly they like ask me a question as if i know wtf they were talking abt and it just makes me feel rlly shitty

[ursamajori]

god i love being SOOO obnoxious about my ocs everyone should be 50% more obnoxious about their ocs right neow

[desire-mona]

me when im forced to remember that the autism isnt just a fun secret way to like my fav band more than everyone else and that ill actually never be able to navigate social situations normally

[thegreatyin]

firmament chapter 3 is. very long. though admittedly length is relative and mostly just constricted by how many actions every other step in this chapter costs

[lesbiansanemi]

Remind me to never live with neurotypical ppl who have never had money issues in their life/have families who are willing to give them however much money they want whenever they ask. Genuinely infuriating ppl to live with who do not consider how their actions affect others ever. How am I on round 2 of this

[lex-the-lesbiann]

my most controversial dndads take is probably that i think code purple was the right decision what who said that?!

[schizokaneko]

the worst part is that i cant even read community posts talking about ny constsnt pain and sensitivity to it because im always in pain and bringing attention to that pain makes me feel it more because now i am consciously aware ofvit again . they need to invent a feeling of community for the disabled that doesnt make u experience ur symptoms

Is this a sign that I need to take another ibuprofen guys idk

[econeechan]

I'll be Supa honest maybe I just like jirai clothing cause the blouses make me look either like a vampire or a princess. 🤷‍♂️ other than that if u don't have enough money to be spending on sets it's just gonna look bland n boring like any other jirai kei (which is my case). I don't rlly think I like the elegant girly style. I like looking like a zombie or a vampire or a princess and jirai kei doesn't really give this to me? I'll still be buying jirai kei pieces tho cause I can style them with other stuff I have.

[skrunksthatwunk]

why the fuck did i write about birds this fucking sucks. i just found out birds only sleep for a few minutes at a time, hundreds of times a day. do you know what this is going to do to my structure? the logistics of their road trip? this is already like three days late and i've been fighting for my life to get A Plot Like Any Plot That Makes Sense out and now the birds fucking sleep for 5 minutes at a time.

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

Please BE EXCITED about stuff you like/ want to be excited about 💞 That's what life supposed to be about, finding joy in the smallest things, in the things we enjoy and love. And the people that judge us for having that joy in our hearts lose their own life, because they spend too much time judging someone else's life instead of doing something with their own. FUCK them

this is one of my favorite asks and i love you

[queer-crusader]

Gnawing at the bars of my cage. Begging for the theatre peeps tonight to tell me there's always space for one more to join them. Hissing at my supervisor. Crawling from paycheck to paycheck. U know how it is