#smart detox
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Recent data show rates of anxiety and depression among teens have more than doubled since the early 2010s, coinciding with the widespread adoption of smartphones and social media.
Read More: https://thefreethoughtproject.com/solutions/10-teens-gave-up-smartphones-for-a-month-heres-what-happened
#TheFreeThoughtProject
#the free thought project#tftp#smart phones#childrens health defense#digital detox#social media#solutions#teens
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"I'm an alcoholic" (original shitty ukulele song)
youtube
Tabs? You mean like bar tabs?
Original shitty song by me, Construct Breakdown.
#alcohol#drinking#alcoholic#drunk#booze#liquor#boozefree#alcoholics anonymous#smart recovery#ethanol#art#alcohol rehab#drug rehab#drug detox#drugblr#drug abuse#drug blog#music#original song#original music#ukulele#ukulele song#small artist#small artist support#procreate#create#Youtube
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Meise
#Family holiday from hell is finally over and pasi was smart enough to book us a day of botanical gardens#Right after it as a detox
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oh no
I’ve been experimenting with weed baking, as my friends irl know. Found a recipe for butter pecan bourbon fudge and decided to try it. Recipe is okayish -- nothing special, might tinker with it, anyway -- and the proportion of butter called for was the same. I used the same pan I use for my usual brownies, because the recipe suggested that. “Oh, good,” I thought, stupidly. “I can make a rough experiment of this, and compare a 2x2 slice of brownie with a 2x2 slice of fudge.” And even though the fudge came out weirdly thin, less than half the height of the brownies I usually make, I just shrugged and cut that 2x2 slice. Bon apetit.
Everybodies and everyones, I had forgotten that I am bad at math. Mistakes were made.
So on further calculation I have had approcimately 4x my usual dose. There is a ringing all around me and the foundations of the world have bebgun to shake. I don’t know where this train is going, but I guess I’ll see y’all when I see you.
#'she got weirder and weirder' they're gonna say of me one day#I had forgotten the ENTIRE THIRD DIMENSION#I really thought I was smart#I'm fine irl friends#I'm just way way higher than I like to be#I just want to sleep#not trip the gotdamn light fantastic#I'mma detox for a few days after this#my god#it's full of stars#posts from when I'm high#this is 'these edibles ain't shit' but I MADE THE EDIBLES
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Unlock Radiant Hair with Smart Detox Hair Care
Use the professional products from DrBeautyCare to discover the beauty of vivid, healthy hair. Our Smart Detox Hair care range profoundly cleanses your hair, removing impurities and product buildup for a fresh, revitalized look. Our Color Protect Haircare line keeps your shade vibrant and long-lasting for color-treated hair, protecting against fading and damage. Our Hair Elixir adds shine, smoothness, and frizz control to give you sleek, gorgeous hair all day.
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The Best Detox Programs for Weight Loss and Overall Health
Ready to kickstart your weight loss and revitalize your health? Explore our guide to the best detox programs for a healthier you! 💪🍏 #DetoxForHealth #WeightLossJourney
In the quest for a healthier, leaner self, detox programs have emerged as a popular solution. These programs not only promote weight loss but also contribute to overall well-being. In this guide, we’ll explore the best detox programs designed to help you achieve your weight loss goals while enhancing your general health. We’ll delve into the various types of detox programs, provide guidance on…
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Humans are weird: Space Ice
Alien: By the gods……what did you do?
Human: What do you mean?
Alien: Luminal III was a desert world, and you’ve been on the world for half a century and now it’s a lush planet.
Alien: What did you do?
Human: Simple.
Human: Space ice.
Alien: What?
Human: Space ice.
Alien: I….I still don’t follow.
Human: Well it’s a desert world with almost no water, so we went out and got some.
Alien: You got some….in space ice?
Human: Well yeah.
Human: There are literal hundreds of thousands of chunks of frozen ice just floating in asteroid belts or orbiting planets in rings.
Human: So we sent a couple dozen harvester ships to grab them and then bring them back to the planet.
Alien: ………………..
Alien: Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?
Human: What do you mean?
Alien: Do you have any idea what was in that ice?
Alien: Possibly frozen organisms or diseases that are in those chunks of ice.
Human: Yeah we knew all about that.
Human: We’ve watched “The Thing” enough times to know what could be frozen inside random blocks of ice.
Human: We had each block scanned and detoxed before introducing it to the planet’s surface.
Human: By the end of twenty years into the operation enough water had been distributed that several large underground lakes were filled to capacity.
Human: Water on the surface continued to evaporate and condense into clouds causing temperatures to slowly decrease. This coupled with the underground water supplies resulted in land masses becoming more temperate and damp.
Alien: Thank you for explaining basic science class processes to the species that mastered inter-dimensional travel.
Human: Well if you’re so god-damn smart why didn’t you think of this?
Alien: *Opens mouth to counter but stops
Human: You’ve encountered at least a hundred desert worlds and never thought, “Hey, maybe if I add water things will get better?”
Alien: *Stares in angry silence.
Human: Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Human: Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go make a second amazon rainforest called “Amazon+”.
Alien: But why?
Human: For shits and giggles mostly at this point.
#humans are weird#humans are insane#humans are space oddities#humans are space orcs#scifi#story#writing#original writing#niqhtlord01#funny
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a sticky situation.
peter parker x male reader.
summary: peter has a major crush on his roommate: you. everything unravels when he walks in on you changing.
wc: 4.1k. genre: smut. warnings: holland!peter, sub!top peter, voyeur!peter, college!au, dry-humping, grinding, frotting, handjobs, kissing, peter's first time, dubcon, cumplay, peter and reader are shooters, characters are aged up!
a bite of the cold air shuddered your damp and nude body once you stepped out of the bathroom, cataloguing the tidiness of your shared bedroom after. your shoulders tensed when the heated air and cold draft clashed for an estate of your body. but by the way your muscles eased into the green towel around your waist, you’ve figured which side won the war. a warm cheer to victory buzzed in your head.
god, did i luck out with peter…
you found yourself repeating that observation often these days. it’s only been two months into the semester, but you’ve already concluded that peter was leagues better than your previous roommate. though, the bar was low—he was kind of a homophobe. that guy was a walking proof of evidence that opposites, in fact, do not attract.
on the other hand, peter had proven that similar interests and personalities were the foundation of beautiful, growing relationships: both platonically and romantically. still, relationships were never that black and white—a grey area. a theory that will forever be tested on, only for the outcome to come out vaguer than before, you’ve realized.
peter was like you: friendly, smart, awkward at times, funny to some. you and him basically have the same qualities of a dog, but there was more to it.
you both shared the same liking down to the genre of video games, the magic of fantasy novels, the cleanliness of a room, the color-coded organization of study notes, and more.
from there, the similar line of characteristics began to blur. whereas you’d prefer to learn from experience, peter liked playing by the book—sticking to it if he could. peter liked red, you liked blue. he favored savory snacks, you devoured them, but preferred sweet drinks.
opposites attract—the theory was once again, broad in your honor.
difference and similarities aside, you were lucky to have peter in your life. the bedroom was colder before you went to shower, but now it blossomed with a gentle heat.
he knew you hated the cold after a warm shower.
taking the other towel, you dried off the rest of your body while you checked your phone for notifications: a missed call from a friend and a few emails regarding construction around the building you had your classes in.
seriously? still? it’s been almost a year already…
normally, you wouldn’t have walked into the bedroom like this, baring skin and all. but peter went to get food because you both have become familiarized with what they served as food at parties.
note to self: you cannot get full off alcoholic beverages. you and peter both tried two parties ago, and it ended with you two sharing the toilet bowl, detoxing your insides of that liquid poison the entire night. the only enjoyment that resulted from that night was learning that peter was a drunk-crier, and you, a drunk-dancer. your friendship had only leveled up since.
you slid on your white briefs once you dried off before shuffling to the other side of the room, browsing through your shared closet aimlessly: he took the left side, you took the right. it was always dim at those parties, so a nice outfit would be wasted. also, you somehow became a magnet for other people’s misfortunes. it took hours to get rid of the smell of this one girl’s vomit—you threw it out in the end.
“no, no… it’s going to be cold later…” you cycled through your clothes again, sighing when nothing caught your eye. “guess i can wear this aga-“
“hey!” out of nowhere, peter’s voice sprung out from the side of the room, followed by a quiet thud, and you twisted your bare body towards the source out of fright.
“jesus, you scared me.” the closet door blocked your view of peter, and vice versa, but you presumed he was leaning against the frame—a habit you noted. “i didn’t even hear you come back.”
“sorry- what was i saying..? oh!” his shadow loomed between you and him, growing as he stepped closer to the closet. “did you want to eat now or-“
judging from the volume of his voice, you should’ve expected how close peter was when you shut the closet. “fuck!” you jumped back, eyes widening when he was practically chest to chest with you. “dude, you really gotta stop doing that.”
on a daily basis, you always looked up at him, but you never paid it much thought to how much taller he was.
“sorry! guess everyone’s a little antsy with the- oh.” he paused.
“what?” you curiously looked up at him, catching sight of his wandering gaze. you were quick enough to follow it, flickering between glimpses of your bare body and face several times like a tennis ball. somehow, you didn’t puzzle the pieces between his shock and your curiosity until he backed away, skittish in nature.
you were in your underwear. still in your underwear. the barrier was the captor of your embarrassment, heat rosed your cheeks as you stood frozen. and with it, the barrier was also your savior.
“oh- OH!” the size of your eyes matched his and upon realizing he’s been staring for far too long, peter cowered his gaze to the side, a gentlemanly hand blocking his sight as he further backed to the door frame, then blindly bumped his shoulder into the door. “i’m so sorry-“
“no, no! i should’ve knocked. i-“ he groaned out, pacifying the sting to his shoulder with his palm. “that was stupid of me, i’m gonna-“
that was another similarity that you both valued: privacy.
before you could reply, he scattered off. for a moment, you felt hot in the face, in the neck, even on your chest. but it would only take a few more seconds for your skin to cool, comforted by the fact that you could’ve shown more—you didn’t.
when peter scrambled out of the room, his gaze fixated on the ground, to the stripes of his socks as they shuffled to the kitchen.
but he never made it very far, because he was easily persuaded. either by his hormones, by the shape of your body, or by his closeted feelings about you. in the end, it didn’t matter because a tightening feeling conjured him back to his original spot—it was always going to be about you.
he was silent in his footsteps, treading backwards to the bedroom as his throat ran dry—heartbeat equally.
tonight. i should do it tonight. are my feelings that obvious? god, i hope not. wait, no- they are! they gotta be… who the fuck wipes marshmallow off of your roommate’s lips and calls them cute?!
peter does.
as his thoughts ran rampant, clouded his regularly murky mind, you were in his line of sight, perfectly captured in the middle of his gaze—now stilled—awe-strucked while he watched you change.
quick portraits of your thick thighs and calves came and went before they were completely masked by the slide of your shorts. then your stomach and chest; pliant, moist skin that layered over the contours of your body before being covered by a tee. he exhaled, then inhaled, smelling the scent of your shampoo and body wash, and he was delighted because you own that scent.
enraptured because only peter could have his senses triggered by you on a daily basis.
if peter could frame this moment, it would be an expensive endeavor that would sacrifice all the money in the world to find the most perfect materials that complemented your textured skin. your smooth body. your handsome face.
you. that was all he wanted.
peter had been trapped since the day he saw you unpacking your things into the dorm. sweaty from the sun, and you knew that, because you refused to shake hands with him until you insisted on washing up first. he wished you never did—your thighs looked better sweating under those shorts.
he’s had crushes before. one in middle school, three in high school. but they amounted to nothing, he never had the confidence. rather, he preferred isolating himself and admiring from afar. rejections had already been predicted, and he was used to the feeling of defeat. if someone were to accept his advances one day, then that would lead to a disruption of events—a catastrophic end to humanity—he joked.
you were different to peter. he loved how, for once, he didn’t have to be the one initiating conversation. he also loved how you didn’t use him for answers because instead, you would help him out with his assignments.
oh, is that professor warren’s class? I think i still have the textbook for her class… let me look.
even when it would only take five minutes to grab a drink down the street, you still invited him. not out of pity like everybody once did, but because he was your friend. parties have never been your thing, but you accompanied them with him because it made him feel better—to know someone.
maybe since he’s grown more mature since then, but now that he was off on his own, it was up to him to predict his future. it was an advice you gave him one night, and he’s kept that close to his heart since then. not the hate that had inflicted his mind, not his peers telling he wasn’t good enough for someone—but him.
in his imaginary world, peter could feel the walls shake when he was around you. the buildings would then fall apart, the earth would scorch civilians and planetary life with heat, and the thundering rain would only make it worse. it was a morbid image. yet, if it meant that you truly liked him, then…
aliens, come do your thing. we insist upon an invasion!
peter wanted you. point, blank, period. it wasn’t his preferred way to confess, but intense sentiments of like, love, lust—all at the same time—ate him up on the inside, and he was scared of being devoid of feelings for you.
“i want… you,” peter muttered, and you jolted again, turning back around in case you misheard him. you were bewildered at the sight of him. once again, you didn’t hear his footsteps.
“what?” you shuffled nervously on your feet. the tension in the air was thick and hot now with the way he stared back at you, frightened yet assured.
“i want you.” there was credence in peter’s tone, and he neared to the door now.
your eyes narrowed into the deep abyss of peter’s eyes as you sat on the foot of your bed, putting on socks. somewhere in your endeavors, you found a flicker of that familiar joke. “ha. ha. very funny,” you muttered bitterly.
it haunted you. as soon as you came out, you were taunted by those same exact words by your ‘friends,’ by your previous roommate. what made you different from them became a simple reason to cease empathy and kindness, and you were baffled that this was happening again.
maybe peter was like the others after all.
you avoided peter’s gaze in favor of the floor, the legs of your desk, your rug—anywhere but him—and you could feel the color drain out of your face, out of this room—deja vu. “look, i know it’s funny to you because i like guys and for whatever reason, straight guys like to flirt with gay men to get a reaction out of us,”
the rug cushioned the weight of a familiar pair of feet, and you looked up, a great frown etched in your face when your eyes met peter’s. he towered over you, bewildered. “but it makes me uncomfortable. and it’s not funny to-“
he didn’t know what roused him. the pain in your voice made him want to apologize without any resort to excuses. the pout on your lips made him want to cradle your head, yet kiss you at the same time. the growing tent in his pants made him want to pin you to your bed, and simply ravish you.
it was all a blur.
his impulsive thoughts became a reality once he stole the remaining words left in your distress, and clumsily swallowed them with a kiss. you didn’t have time to process his lips on yours because you were then pushed onto your back, stilted and surprised, as peter applied his weight on top of yours—his broader build shadowed you in welfare.
“pete-“ you groaned into the hot, breathy kiss, and despite the light attempts to push him away, you were compelled to return the wet exchange. breathlessly, you repeated, “stop, this isn’t funny-“ he kissed you again. all this time, you could’ve had him, but you deluded yourself into thinking otherwise.
“i’m not laughing,” peter muttered, and his hips began moving into yours, aimlessly trying to alleviate the stiffness in his pants. “i want you.” his voice lowered—no longer a confession, but a demand. he rocked into you harder once he felt you throb under those tight short, and you slipped out a moan, memorizing the beat of peter that pulsated against you.
you remembered him being bashful when you two talked about your firsts. you weren’t completely inexperienced like he was, but you mentioned that it’s been a while since you’ve done anything remotely intimate. school was your focus, a relationship was your reward.
“peter,” you repeated again, he wasn’t listening. “peter.” he whispered a demand; to keep calling his name, and you couldn’t help but quietly chuckle at the cliché line often heard in soft porn.
then, you cupped your hands around his temples to pull him away. he gazed into you with ardent hunger, almost annoyed that you ruined the trail of kisses he began leaving on your neck. “did you drink without me? because if you did, then i don’t think we should-“
“i didn’t,” he sobered on the softness of your lips, and like a flip switch, he snapped out of his fictional world of you. “fuck- i’m so sorry, i didn’t even ask you if you wanted to- fuck, i even forgot to say that i like you.” he ranted to himself, beginning to pull himself away. “this was not how it was supposed to go.”
infatuation had expanded into something beyond your control, and your feelings for him ignited even more. a wick bursted into powerful flames, and it warmed your body knowing that you two shared the same sentiment.
before he completely peeled himself off your body, you pulled him down by the neck, then pressed your nose to his, grinning. “I like you too.” a peck to the tip of his nose, then the center of his lips. your onslaught of fleeting kisses to his skin drowned him, pacifying every muscle in his body until it became jelly, and also making it all the more easier to roll him under you.
“not exactly how i imagined my first date with you, but,” you straddled his lap, roaming your hands around peter’s chest, an asset of his you’ve frequently daydreamed about. “you sure?”
the applied pressures to your waist, then bottom should’ve been a definite measure of his answer, but he smiled up at you, guiding a steady pace of your hips to his groin. he was easily distracted, suddenly cascading his other palm up your shirt then down to finally feel the bare skin he had spent long showers jerking off to. fantasies had now been served onto a platter before him, and peter planned on devouring you, piece by piece. “please.”
“must have had a lot on your mind if you couldn’t even confess to me.” it was unusual to see him like this—absolutely enthralled by your presence, high off of it. aching for more of you with the way he pushed his groin into you. “how long have you been thinking about this?” being unusual always had negative connotations to it.
you pressed into him harder, rubbing at his print with gallant grinds. not in this moment.
he moaned, “far too long…” then fumbled with the waistband of your shorts before doing the same with the zipper. “you’ve been driving me crazy, especially these days.” it was a simple task, a daily labor that peter was great at, but his hands shook when his finger met metal. you chuckled, and placed a comforting hand to his cheek, stroking the soft skin with the amplest caress.
take your time. i’m not going anywhere.
“mind sharing what you thought about then?” the only time you peel yourself away from peter’s groin was to help him slide your shorts off, then his jeans. peter lifted his hips, and you two were joined together again. aching together. “just curious.” you joked by pulsating your bulge, and he shyly laughed when he saw the restrictive twitch.
felt it.
“well... where do i start?” peter’s warm hand rested on your inner thigh, dangerously close to your erection while delicately exploring your soft skin. “there’s been so many times where i just wanted to…” he was too ashamed to finish his sentence, looking away.
“wanted to…?” your body arced over his, placing a persuading kiss to his cheek, then neck. “what was it?” they lingered, sunk deep into his skin with the utmost affection, and he left the deepest, pleasurable sighs as if you withdrew it from him. you commenced his dilemma. “tell me what you thought when you first saw me. saw that i was your roommate.”
“i...” peter began, and you could tell his nerves got the best of him, so you rocked into him again, begged with your hips. the position made it easier to feel all of him, press into his warmth more, and you couldn’t stop. wouldn’t. “i didn’t know what to feel. i was happy, that i had someone as kind as you…” you gleefully hummed, agreeing as you continued leaving kisses to his neck.
“then i was nervous, because you were so… cute. handsome. beautiful.” he moaned when you began to grind in slow, deep strides. your bulges squeezed and pushed one another, peter did the same, growing impossibly bigger against you. “but when i saw you in those shorts, sweating because move-in day was always on a hot day…”
“yeah?” you beckoned him to finish his sentence because you were closing your eyes now, remembering that very moment because you felt the same. the way peter’s chest, his muscles, were broad and stunning under his own layer of sweat, under his loose shirt, under that naivety that you would never have dreamed to think of him as such a…
“i just wanted to fuck you.”
pervert.
the shy smile he gave you messed with your perception of him. clearly, you’ve underestimated him all this time, and you kissed him again. “so, you only thought about pleasuring yourself.”
he quickly broke the kiss to defend himself. “wait, no! t-that’s not what i meant.”
“peter, relax.” your laugh calmly settled into a comforting smile, and you blindly reached down to his thick print, feeling and squeezing at whatever you can because you were desperate to explore him. “i’m joking.” his chest rose.
for the remainder of time, you spent it stroking peter through his underwear. dryly to his frustration, but he never told you because he wanted to experience you in every way. his lips never left yours, only parted to moan into your mouth when you shoved your hand into his briefs to sate your desire to feel him bare.
peter was big in your small hand. the weight felt suffocating to your palm when you grabbed ahold of his sack, fondling his balls, then stroking his cock again, and you were intoxicated in the way he melted under you, looked into you, begged for you to go faster.
you did. who wouldn’t when he gazed at you with the most puppy-like eyes?
he had complete control of you now, because every action, every stroke, from then on had been a journey to his personal paradise. you didn’t care that you were left abandoned, that you were aching harder than he was. watching him was more than adequate.
both pairs of briefs and shirts have been tossed to the side now, and you maintained your straddle. it was riveting to watch how much bigger peter was when you took both of your cocks together and stroked. he practically enveloped you with the weight of his length, the girth of his shaft, and you wallowed in the fact that he was incredibly bashful about it.
peter’s hand never left your body. he charmed you by his neediness. it was clumsy in execution, but he always squeezed a moan out of you with he felt your ass, your chest, your nipples, your thighs. “fuck, pete.”
everything about you was beautiful, incredibly more so when you caved into him as he dealt kisses to your bare skin and took his own turn at jerking the both of you off.
he was eager. delirious. hard, stiffening hard, against you, and you felt every vein pulsate the harder— the faster—he squeezed and stroked. you leaned back, hands planted to the mattress beneath you, then maneuvered your hips to the rhythm of his fist. you found a pace while peter kept you steady, and fucked into his fist, against his wet cock, sliming your dripping pre-cum together with the utmost fervor.
“wait, (m/n),” he hiccuped, and his hold on you tightened, nails dug into your left waist but you ignored his plea, fucking steadily into his fist. “stop, i’m going to-“ they fell on deaf ears, and mouth agape, peter watched you with incredulity. you can feel his body flex, your balls smushed to his when you grinned up, your pre-cum sticking to his, his to yours, like a sick web. “s-stop, oh god.”
and peter unraveled before you with a guttural moan, finishing the rest of his plea with a blasting of thick and creamy ropes to his chest, like a cannon. the force was strong enough to have a few shots land on his face, then his hair, and then somewhere above because peter was a big shooter—a strong one, you’d passionately testify. “f-fuck, i didn’t mean to cum so-“
“holy shit.” you watched peter in all his glory, then in his embarrassment, while stilted on his lap and sweating, not taking notice of the delay of your climax because it crept up on you quick. a rocket broke the cloud in your thoughts with a boom, and you spilled all over him, shooting like fireworks. “shit!”
peter was your canvas, and it was your duty to paint him. debris of sex splattered everywhere, because you somehow found the strength to continue fucking yourself into the cream of fist, unloading and unloading onto him until you were dry, heaving and dripping.
“fuck- I didn’t mean to ruin your sheets-” he mumbled, a blush stained his cheeks, and you joined in the warmth with a kiss, panting.
“where’s the fun in all of this if you aren’t going to stain at least one thing.” your brows raised at the wet stain on the wall above peter’s head, right below your wall-shelf, and peter’s gazed followed.
he groaned, distressed by the evident he made. “fuck, sorry…” his bashfulness only endeared you even more.
“it’s okay,” you hopped off his lap, stretching your arms into the air. “i’ll clean you up.”
“okay,” peter lay still, his hand cautiously held over his stomach to catch the drips of his cum and yours. it was fascinating to watch the mixture flow together, strands of it melding and un-webbing as he played with the sticky residue. it was the scientist in him. “my towel is on the- fuck-“
without a beat, you took his dripping flaccid cock into your mouth, sucking off any remnants of spunk. an unfamiliar taste you weren’t used to, bitter and salty. it wasn’t until you noticed how peter’s eyes glazed over you, half-lidded because he was in heaven now, that you found the taste of him delectable. peter’s caution for staining your bed sheets was disregarded, because he knew you’d clean the rest of him off.
after you pulled away with a soft pop, he traced your wet lips with the cum on his fingers, then his knuckles, before he pushed one by one into your mouth. one finger at first, then two, then three, you moaned erotically around his digits as peter pumped, marveling in the eagerness of your mouth. he slowly pushed more cum into your mouth. the creamy residue gathered at the corner of your mouth at first but he made sure to scoop it back in, and continued doing so until he was polished clean.
nothing was wasted.
the taste of you and him spread in the warmth of your tongue, and you have never felt more intoxicated.
to peter, you have never looked more beautiful.
nouearth. please do not repost, plagiarize, or translate my works. andif you like this story, please reblog and leave a like!
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17+ content, ageless blogs dni
male manipulator 🤩, dumbification, brief choking, poorly proofread, author’s note at the end :)
fratboy!dick grayson, a man of many… talents. one of which, turning off that pretty head of yours. “you need a break,” he argues with a sly hand in your knee. “a detox, or a detour- whatever you wanna call it.” the charm is almost painful, yet it still scares you that this is what your girlfriends fall for; the guy that’s just looking out for you, regardless of how whorish he gets at those frat parties.
“I don’t need you to tell me that, grayson.” your hand swats and easily dismisses him, spiky because you’d rather die under your stress than succumb to the disease that is dick grayson. you’re absolutely positive you can see through the lousy attempts of looking at you as if he actually cares. he’s just another fratrat trying to get his dick wet, and your pride won’t allow it.
fratboy!dick grayson, who makes you lose your resolve with just a few favors and treats. interacting with every post, listening intently so he can get those notes you missed from tuesday, speaking in like a proper man whenever you pass by, all so he can fuck you like he’s doing you a favor.
fratboy!dick grayson goes so far he spoils you, pays for the more expensive take-out and pays for your nails every now and then, lets you catch rides so often that a few of his brothers call you his passenger princess- fucking hell, your pride’s out of the question at this point. at first, you decline and decline and decline, but in your slumps, you have to convince yourself it’s playing smart to pretend you’ve fallen victim.
fratboy!dick grayson, who’d catch you on a particularly rough spot in the semester. you’re stressed, snippy, and every type of frustrated, making his goal seem closer by the day. just a couple of well thought words and good points of how hard you work for yourself to sweet talk you into a hook up, and you hate yourself because it was fucking worth it. that mother fucker made you forget about all the assignments, the studying, the upcoming finales, everything except him and his cock twisting up your insides.
“you need this, don’t you?” he’d encourage out of an attempt to keep you from backing out, watching the way your eyes roll just from his hand down your panties. gentle circles around your clit make you gasp just before he delves deeper and he huffs, almost in disbelief at how wet you are. “you’re too pretty to be stressing as much as you do,” he’d mutter against warm skin, open mouthed kisses in place of hickeys he can’t litter across your collarbone until he’s got you too sex dazed to stop him from doing so.
fratboy!dick grayson, who still spoils you, spending generous time groping through your bra before sliding it off when you unclasp the back. knuckles deep inside of you and sucking at your tits as he massages the other, guiding your body closer to his while he murmurs through pleased hums at your sudden eagerness. because he’s doing this for you, remember? your pleasure is his, and he proves it by kissing between your tits and down your tummy until he reaches that sweet cunt he’d been so patient- no, so good to you for.
fratboy!dick grayson who guides your hands to a mess of black hair as he indulges himself, thumb replaced with his lips and tongue to slick up the bundle of nerves and sucking to elicit a startled moan. still deep inside of you, his fingers gain a certain intensity that has you bucking into his face and tugging on his hair until a little moan slips out against your heat.
“right there, yeah?” he checks in after a weak cry of his name falls from your lips, and he’s pleased to have finally abandoned the formality of grayson for the sliver of intimacy he gets from your breathy moans of oh my god- dick— so similar to the moans he’s drawn out of much easier women, but yours feels like a well earned award. “so fuckin’ wet already,” dick groans as he spreads you open, pussy lips already tainted with his saliva and he blows on your clit, just to make you flinch.
fratboy!dick grayson, who makes you cum on his fingers and tongue twice in quick succession before slipping them into his mouth, putting on a little show so you can really see the way his tongue worked those two blissful moments out of you. he gives a low suggestion that you should hav a taste, though the idea’s forgotten when the tip of his cock slots between your thighs.
“such a good girl, huh?” he taunts rather than praises, fucking you deep into the mattress with a firm but gentle hand around your neck to test the waters. your hand clings to his wrist as you whine, unintentionally communicating your need for a harder grip that he’s more than happy to apply. “smart girl just needed that pretty little head turned off for a bit- that’s all, isn’t it?” your legs tremble when you weakly nod, whining and babbling about how good he’s been to you.
“I know, baby,” he assures you when you cry for him again, lowering his head into the crook of your neck. “talk to me- what’s that empty head thinkin’ about now, huh?” dick asks, but coherent words have been lost between pathetic whimpers and loud keens as he sucks at your neck. if you were any ounce of sane right now, he’d have a black eye, but he’s doing you so much more than a favor. it’d be terribly rude to repay him in such a way.
fratboy!dick grayson’s had you cum on his cock at least once before he’s twisting body body around, seemingly forgetting to pull out as he lays you on your tummy and slinks your ass up into his pelvis. dick lingers at the sight- pretty arched back and two supple mounds of your flesh as your drool soils his pillows. by now, you’re so out of it that you feel he’s lingered a bit too long; instinctively, you sway and roll your hips back into him for stimulation. a long whistle follows a guttural groan before his hands fuck you back against his cock, rocking your ass up and down with lewd plaps of wet skin against his.
“feels good, dick-“ you slur into pillows like a used up slut, “‘s so good, fuckin’ me so deep- thank you, thank fuck…” sparkly nails—the same ones he’d bought you—claw at sheets as you go on, biting into your arm a little when he gets rougher.
“cum for me one more time, pretty thing,” he urges, ego dwelling from the pathetic and dumb babbling he’s fucked out of you. pulling your hair to force your arch impossibly deeper, he puts in more work for the last few thrusts, moaning with you as you clamp around his cock and scream into the sheets. “goddamn- can’t even hear me, can you?” distantly, you put together that he’s laughing at you as he fucks you through arguably the most intense orgasm you’ve ever had, and your cries become silent from euphoria.
fratboy!dick grayson, who sprays his cum all over your ass with a long curse, cock resting between your asscheeks with a few lazy thrusts as white dribbles from tip and leaks to the dip in your back.
fratboy!dick grayson, who leaves you hanging on to your consciousness by a thread as he flips you back over, holding your jaw and squishing your rosy cheeks for that humiliatingly cute and fucked out face he’s plastered onto you. “you still with me, right?” he grins at the weak whines you manage, “or did I fuck your brains out already?”
fratboy!dick grayson, who sneaks his phone out for a quick flick, taking after his best friend just to keep himself a souvenir in case you decide he’ll never get this lucky again. ❧
a/n ;; first off, thank you for reading, i hope it’s up to parr. second off, thank you SO much for 1k hello,?:!,!? that is a crazy ass number compared to my last blog. you all are so engaging and i appreciate all the love so much, so I thought i’d write something that’s a bit new (and longer lmao) but still very much in my realm of writing. fratboy!dick grayson lingers in the back of my mind 24/7, yall dont understand. i’m ranting but anyway, thank you again <333333
#peep the wally west mention at the end 😙#kisses for him as well#kali ;; dg#kali ;; wet dreamz#dick grayson smut#dick grayson x reader#dick grayson x you#dick grayson x female!reader#dick grayson x fem!reader#dick grayson imagine#dick grayson fic#nightwing x you#nightwing x reader#nightwing smut#dc smut#black!reader#dc x black!reader#dick grayson x black!reader
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your moms are here
leah williamson x reader, jordan nobbs x reader, (wobbs as coparents)
part 5 of beautiful girl series pt.1 -> pt.2 -> pt.3 -> pt.4
warnings: if your any bit emotionally unstable this isn’t for u x
You didn’t expect to wake up, let alone wake up warm and in a fraction of the amount of pain you’d been in the last time you’d been conscious enough to feel anything.
Your eyes were still crammed shut, your chest still hurt, your body was still shaking, but you felt better, less like you were dangling on the cliff of life and death, you weren’t sure where you were, or if you were even alive.
Was this they greater beyond?
Was it the warmth of death’s embrace?
You knew it wasn’t, because there was still the dull pain and the tension all over your body. You didn’t believe that life after death was anything, that it was actually some overwhelming cloud of happiness and perfection, but if it did exist, if there was some kind of heaven, this wasn’t it.
You thought about the places you could be, in bed at Matt’s house, in bed at your mom’s house, in bed at some kidnappers house, in bed at rehab.
You quickly eliminated each option, the bed and sheets weren’t the same from your bed or Matt’s, kidnappers didn’t normally concern themselves with comfortability, and in your mind rehab would have more detoxing, screaming, junkies.
Out of pure fear, you tried to crack your eyes open, it wasn’t easy, but with some concentration that made your forehead feel like it was being split open, you managed to slowly crack your right eye open. There was sleep and tears keeping your eyelashes stuck together, which made it far harder then it should have been, the blinding white light directly above your head wasn’t much help either.
You took back what you thought, everything hurt.
From your toenails to the follicles on top of your head, it felt like every single nerve in your body was being plucked and split in half.
Your whole body curled itself up into a ball, it made the shaking a little bit less like your body was being exorcised.
You realised very quickly as your eye became accustomed to the light around you that you were in the last place you possibly wanted to be.
You should have clocked on to it, based on the persistent beeping noise coming from above you and the cords that were connected to your arm.
They’d dropped you off out the front of a fucking hospital.
Or someone had found you and called a ambulance.
Or your moms had taken you to the hospital.
Or you were in some sick twisted dream.
With the rest of the energy that was left in your body you managed to crack open your other eye, it wasn’t easy, but it helped you feel more aware of your surroundings.
It was a surprisingly quiet hospital, or at least by your standards.
You tried to sit up, but it was no use, your body was completely spent, all of the energy felt like it had been completely pulled from your body.
Withdrawals, maybe.
Or the reaction of the opioid with the stimulant.
Those were your best guesses as to how you’d ended up feeling like death.
You didn’t have to wait long to find out, the curtain which was keeping you contained from the rest of the ER was opened up, a nurse waltzing her way over to your bedside.
You couldn’t help but feel a little bit vulnerable, you could hardly move your body and had a lot less control over it then you would have liked.
“Miss dump and run awakens.”
Dump and run.
You couldn’t decide whether or not you were mad with your friends, on one hand, it was smart of them to drop you off at an er. They had no medical knowledge, they were druggies, they didn’t need a dead body on their hands. On the other hand, they’d left you, deserted you, left you for dead.
The nurse moved to your IV and monitor, looking at the different flashing numbers and writing them down on her clipboard, before she looked down and addressed you properly.
“Had a lot of drugs in your system for such a wee thing like yourself. Your friends were smart to drop you here, you would have been as good as dead with that much meth in your system for any longer. I’ve seen a lot of overdoses in my day, you might just take the cake though, darlin’.”
Overdose?
A fucking overdose?
You’d been doing drugs for months now, meth, a smidge of coke, little bits of molly and LSD, a little sprinkle of heroin, opioids a couple of times, plenty of weed. Not once had you ever overdosed, you’d never seen someone overdose, you’d come to think it was urban myth.
You’d hardly taken anything, two shoot ups within a couple of hours of each other, it wasn’t something you’d done before but it also wasn’t exorbitant or something you hadn’t seen other people do.
“Sorry, an overdose?”
You were still shaking, it was less obvious underneath the shitty hospital blanket that was on top of you, but you were still shaking like a leaf in the wind.
“Yup, think you had more meth in your blood stream then blood. The saline should flush it all out until your guardians get here.”
Guardians?
What?
What the actual fuck was this nightmare that you were stuck in.
“Sorry, my guardians?”
The nurse looked back down at her clipboard.
“Ms Williamson and Ms Nobbs? We’re obligated to call emergency contacts in life threatening circumstances and those were the ones that were on your phone, they should be here soon enough.”
You didn’t care that you couldn’t moved, you needed to leave.
“I want to discharge, now.”
The nurse looked at you like you had gone silly, like you were in a psychiatric ward instead of the emergency one.
“You’re underage, and you’d have to sign a waiver saying that you are aware you’re going against doctors orders, a lot of paperwork, and you’d actually have to be strong enough to walk out of here, which I can promise you is not happening any time soon,”
The nurse pointed to the IV bag.
“There’s still another hour or so left on this, until it’s done that dizzines your experiencing and the weakness isn’t going to pass. You’re frighteningly dehydrated and full of methamphetamines.”
Fuck.
You were so fucking fucked.
“Please, I’ll sign whatever forms, just let me leave, please.”
You didn’t know how you planned to leave, considering you weren’t even mobile enough to roll onto your back to look at the nurse properly, eye to eye.
“You get up and walk to my desk where the papers are and you can leave, how’s that sound, sweetheart?”
You want to yell directly into her face and tell her to let you fucking leave. But you don’t, you have a inch of self-respect that prevents you from doing it.
“Please.”
You’ve never liked to beg, you did enough of it during your youth, begging for your mom to not leave you home alone every night, begging for things to get better, begging for your life to get better, and it had. Jordan and Leah had introduced you to a whole new world, a beautiful world, the kind of world you’d read about as a child, they’d given you anything and everything you’d wanted growing up. You’d become gracious, but promised yourself that you’d never beg in the same way that you always had, but when your life had been turned upside down, you’d reverted back to your old ways.
“I have a daughter of my own, y’know, around your age. If she was in your situation all I would care about is her being okay, that’s whats most important.”
You rolled your eyes, you were certain of one things, your moms would be mad, you were surprised they were coming at all, everyone had deserted you, it felt like you had nobody.
“Can i get something for the pain?”
You were intelligent enough to know that the iv was detoxing you at a rapid rate, whilst it was saving your life, it also meant that you were going to be sent into withdrawals a lot faster then you should have. You weren’t going to get your hands on meth, clearly. So you needed a substitute, luckily, you were currently sitting in a hospital which was filled with every single painkiller known to man.
“Good try honey, a part from the fact that your bloodstream and body couldn’t even handle a tylenol at the minute, I’m also not going to give an addict drugs, just hang in honey, the chest pain and muscle cramps should start to pass soon.”
Just as she was finishing, your eyes darted to the emergency room doors, which were now hanging open as your two moms and Lia walked through the doors.
Jordan was dressed in the same sweats she’d been in all morning, her face was red and puffy, eyes bloodshot and still full of tears.
Leah looked more put together, she had a pair of slacks on and a clean shirt, her eyes were as red as Jordan’s but she appeared to have put on more of a brave face.
Your eyes darted everywhere, looking for some kind of escape, or to stop their fast steps that were slowly getting closer to you with every millisecond that passed.
There was no hope for you.
If the drugs hadn’t killed you then your moms would.
Leah managed to cross into your makeshift room first, her eyes flashing across every inch of your body. You expected her to ask the nurse a question, or yell at you, but she didn’t.
She walked straight to your bedside, your nurse moving out of the way, and without you being aware of what was happening, wrapped her arms around your body.
You didn’t hug your moms a lot anymore.
In the start, when you’d started out with them, it had taken a lot of effort from them to make you trust them with that kind of contact, but eventually, you’d become reliant on their hugs, the shoulder pats, the little motherly touches here and there that you’d never gotten as a kid.
When they’d broken up, the hugs and contact had faded, similarly to the love in the house, it was like everything personal, everything that made Leah’s house a home had been drained.
“You’re okay, thank god you’re okay.”
Leah’s body lingered on your own body long enough for Jordan’s arms to wrap around your body on the other side of you.
You hadn’t been hugged by the both of them in over a year, you felt guilty for wishing that this wouldn’t be a one time thing, that you could have this whenever you wanted. That wasn’t your life though, it wasn’t your reality, it wasn’t reality.
You let yourself relax, you knew you’d regret it when the moment ended, it’d make it that much harder to realise you couldn’t have this, but you let yourself enjoy it whilst you had it.
It lasted longer than you’d thought, it was hard, Jordan hugs were addictive. You didn’t get them a lot anymore, occasionally you’d get a hug from Leah, once every blue moon when she wanted one, but it wasn’t like this. It wasn’t body on body, feelings on feelings, love on love.
You didn’t know if you knew what love felt like anymore, over the years it had been distorted, you were certain that love could only be given to a person in transaction. It’s why you’d tried to be perfect, the perfect kid, the perfect student, the perfect player. You’d given up when Jordan had left, it didn’t matter anymore, there wasn’t enough love to be shared around between you and Leah. Love to you, was a privilege, not something that everyone had extra of. You had to earn love, or at keast that;s how you’d always seen it. You’d never been good enough for your own parents, that’s how you’d ended up with Jordan and Leah, from them you’d always craved that love, the love you’d never gotten and you’d been willing to do anything for it, you still were.
“We love you so much chicky, so much.”
You enjoyed the little murmurs, the little whispers in your ears that were so heartfelt and meaningful that you could feel the tears of your moms dripping down each side of your neck.
All good things come to and end, but it didn’t make it any easier.
Leah, unsurprisingly was the first to turn to your nurse.
“They didn’t tell me anything on the phone, just that we needed to come here, she’s okay?”
Your nurse nodded at your mom.
“Yes ma’am, we’re flushing her out right now. She wants to discharge herself, it’s going against medical advice but she’s free to once she’d done with her iv and she’s regained some strength.”
Jordan sat down on the bed next to you, leaving a big enough gap of space that you could still feel her presence but weren’t pressed up against her, she was listening just intently as Leah to the nurse.
“Flushing her out? Of what?”
Fuck.
You’d never ever, in your life, known Leah to not be inquisitive, she needed and wanted answers to everything, but this was worrying you. There were things you kept a secret for a reason.
“Methamphetamines, she had a pretty high amount circulating in her body. I can get the doctor to come and talk to you about it. Her body had built up a decent tolerance, she took it a lot better than you or I would. Apart from that she’s in fairly good condition, although the doctor did have some concerns about some scratches and bruises that seemed consistent with domestic or sexual abuse.”
You watched, in a series of moments, your mothers face fall more and more as the nurse kept speaking. Leah was pretty good at having a poker face, she had to for her job, she also kept a brave face for life though. You’d hardly seen a break in her resolve since her injury but right now, she was keeping nothing hidden. You felt Jordan’s body go rigid behind you as well, you knew shit was about to get real.
You considered strangling yourself with the blanket on top of you, or drowning yourself in the toilet bowl in the adjacent bathroom. It sounded better than the conversation that was about to occur.
“You’re daughter is very lucky, stupid, but lucky. Her friends ditched her at the front door, if they had of been any later she’d be in far worse condition. She was here just quick enough for us to counteract the drugs and stop them from effecting her mental cognition. Her friends shouldn’t have ditched her, or let her get that far gone, but you should be grateful they were at least smart enough to take her somewhere she could get help. I’m going to go find the doctor, he can talk to you about different option you have, and I’ll leave you guys to talk for a little bit, okay?”
Leah nodded, dumbfoundedly, trying her best to smile at the nurse as she made her way towards the exit of your room, closing the curtains and then the door.
Leah pivoted as soon as she was gone, looking down at you with so much horror and pain that you could feel it in your gut.
“Meth, bubba? You’ve been doing meth?”
The sentence hung in the air for a few seconds, filling up all of the space, you hoped that after a couple of seconds that it would disappear, like it had never been said.
“It’s not a big deal.”
You should have chosen your words more precisely, but you were finding it hard to think with all of the drug haze clouding your head.
“Not a big deal? You told me it was the vape, then it was weed, then it was coke and now iut’s fucking meth? There is nothing not big about that bubba. This isn’t just something you can do for fun, this isn’t okay, this is serious. You could die from this. You almost did. You’re 17. 17 year olds aren’t supposed to die. Why bubba? What made you want to do this, not just to yourself but to your life, to everyone. Do you know how scared your mother and I have been. The whole team has been calling up hospitals and roaming the streets looking for you. We’ve been terrified.”
Guilt was one of the best ways to make a person admit they were wrong, you knew it, you’d watched your moms manipulate each other during the break up the same way. They’d use something against the other until it spiralled into a massive fight which would end with someone sleeping at a teammates house or on the couch.
“I’m sorry, okay? Can we just go home? I want to go home.”
Another poor choice in words apparently by the look on Leah’s face.
“No we can’t just go home, we need to talk about this bubba, you overdosed on meth. You have a tolerance for it, which means you’ve been using it for a while. You have bruises and you’re in a hospital bed unable to move. You’re addicted to a drug that I would have thought you’d have absolutely no interest in. You’ve got a disease bubba, you’ve got an addiction and we’re going to work it out, we’ll fix it.”
Similar to being a control freak, Leah was also a person who wanted to fix everything. No problem was big enough for her, apparently your whole life wasn’t either.
“Mom this isn’t a disease, this isn’t like fucking cancer or something. I made a choice, I have it under control, this is my life. I’m choosing to live it this way.”
Your mom looks like she’s about to lose her shit.
“I understand that you think you have this under control and that you think this is the best way to be living your life but it fucking isn’t. I understand you’re struggling, but this isn’t okay, you’re a kid, you can;t be doing this.”
Worst thing you can tell a addict, you can’t take drugs.
Because yes you most certainly can, it’s a free motherfucking country.
“I understand what I’m doing, it doesn’t make me a bad person or any different from your or mama. You don’t like who i am anymore, not since i quit football and stopped being who you wanted me to be, I’ve changed and you have to accept that, this is me mom, this is who I am.”
Leah looked flabbergasted.
“You want me to just nod my head and accept my daughter is a junkie, right? That’s the permission you are seeking, you aren’t going to get it bubba, this isn’t anywhere near okay. This isn’t you, people change, I change, you’re allowed to be different then how you were a couple of years ago. Drugs isn’t how you change yourself, it’s not how you reinvent yourself. You can’t live your whole fucking life like this because guess what, you’ll end up dead. Addiction is a degenerative disease, it is incurable, it is deadly, it’s no fucking different from cancer and you’ve got it. I understand that, you’ve got an addiction, we’ll figure it out. I am not going to enable you to keep abusing a substance that will kill you. You’ve got a death wish and I won’t sit by and allow it to happen. I thought I was cool, I thought it was good of me to be accepting that you’re a teenager and you were going to do stupud stuff, I let you get away with much more than I should have. I’m sorry, I’m sorry that if I gave you to much space that you felt the need to do this, I’m sorry that I wasn’t a good enough parent to see the warning signs, but I won’t let you kill yourself bubba, not when I can stop it from happening.”
Jordan was still silent, as passive as ever, she’d always taken a backseat, the silent enabler.
“You’ve got no fucking idea what I’m going through, I’m sorry I scared you, but I don’t have to explain my actions to you, you understand nothing about what I’m dealing with.”
The first time you sweared in the presence of Leah and Jordan was your second day with them. You didn’t even know what swearing was, you’d just picked up words that had been said as you’d been growing up. You hadn’t hesitated to throw a ‘fuck’ out when you’d stubbed your foot on the kitchen bench as you’d been pouring yourself a glass of water.
You’d known something was wrong though when you’d turned around to sit back down at the table with Leah and Jordan and both of them looked like they’d seen a ghost.
You’d hardly swore after that, to your core, you were a people pleaser, you didn’t like to be in trouble, right now though it was like everything you’d grown up with was exiting your body. You felt like a monster, like a version of yourself you didn’t know and it was hard, it was really fucking hard. You didn’t want to break down, you were scared that if you were vulnerable you’d be taken advantage of again, the same way that you friends had, so you put up your won shields.
“I don’t need to know what you’re going through to know that this isn’t good. We’ll get you into rehab, we’ll get you clean, we’re here for you, right Jords?”
You could feel Jordan nodding from behind you.
“I’m not going to rehab, fuck no.”
Leah was pacing, it was what she did when she was stressed, it was a clear tell.
“So, I’m just supposed to allow you back into my house, knowing that you’ve been hiding an addiction from me for months, trust that my drug addicted child will stay clean on her own account and be willing to go through withdrawals and not give in to her own addiction. Do you think I don’t love you, is that it? Because right now you’re telling me that I am expected to allow my daughter to use drugs, lethal drugs that almsot killed her, under my roof, allow you to live your life as you want it, and leave you alone. As a person who loves you and has loved your for the past 9 years of your life, are you actually hearing what you are saying?”
Love.
It was a curious thing, your mother thought she loved you, or at least she felt like she did. Ut was funny how to you, you felt the exact opposite way.
“So what you’re doing this to show me you love me or something? Reality check, you haven’t given a fucking shit about me in months, it’s all about Lia, all about your knee. I’m not selfish enough to expect that you can focus on me whilst your recovering but don’t try and act like you’ve been loving and caring about me this whole time when you haven’t.”
Leah sits herself down, she can only handle so long on her feet nowadays.
“Maybe you should coem stay with me, come to rehab in Birmingham. Bubba, your mom is still struggling.”
You’re more than shocked to hear Jordan pipe up, it reignites something else in you.
“No you don’t get to have a fucking say. You left me, you don’t text anymore, you don’t call. I’m only your kid when it’s convenient for you, which is about 10 days every year. You don’t even try with me, you washed your hands of me a year ago and you don’t get to come back now. You gave me up.”
Your sick of being the understanding one, sick of being the one everybody could burden with their problems, sick of being the fucking scapegoat in every situation.
“Look kid, i think you need to have some more respect for your mothers.”
Lia.
Fucking Lia and her audacity and her fucking butting into all of your family problems.
“No you don’t get a fucking say, you move in a couple of months ago to support my mom and all of a sudden your my third fucking parent. You’ve got nothing to do with me, You don’t get to have a say in anything, you aren’t apart of this fucking family.”
Leah looked like she was having about 30 wars with herself inside of her head, like she was struggling to figure out which side of her brain she should side with.
“Bubba, we’ve talked about this, you need to be respectful to Lia.”
You were sick of everybody telling you that you had to respect people, that you had to follow fucking rules. They wondered why you’d spiralled.
“No, fuck this, fuck you, fuck jordan, fuck everything. I made a series of decisions, ones that I am happy with, this is how I am living my life.”
Leah took a deep breath, before turning to face you.
It was hard looking at her eye to eye, you were putting her through a lot right now, and a part of you deep down felt bad about it. You didn’t want to make your mom feel in pain, you didn’t want her to suffer, it was the last thing you wanted. Without her, you’d be as good as nothing, you’d have absolutely nothing. But you were lashing out, you were as frantic as your sore chest and pumping heart would let you be.
“Bubba. You don’t seen what’s wrong. I do, Jordan and I are sitting here talking to a girl that we don’t know. This isn’t our daughter, this isn’t the girl we’ve raised. You’re going to go to rehab, you’re going to detox, you’re going to get properly clean and once you are we’ll have this conversation again, see if you have a different perspective.”
You didn’t want to have this conversation when you were clean, you wanted to have it now.
“No. If you gave a shit about me, like you’re acting to, you wouldn’t have fucking broken up in the first place. You wouldn’t have torn my life apart, you wouldn’t have done this to me. You wouldn’t have stopped cring about me, you wouldn’t have stopped loving me. Let me go, let me leave. You fucking did this to me and if you want to make it up to me you’ll let me leave.”
You saw Leah’s face fall to another level.
“I can’t do that bubba.”
You felt like you were spinning out of control, like you were in a car that had just fallen over a cliff, and you were slowly doing flip after flip as the car catapulted towards the rocks at the bottom.
“Mom, just let me leave, let me go, please mom, let me leave, let me fucking leave.”
Leah just shook her head at you.
“Bubba, I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, it might not ever. I know me and your mom breaking up was hard for you, you didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry for that, but neither of us could handle keeping you in a household without love, and I know it’s different now, I’m so sorry for that, I wish we could go back. But we can’t, me and your mom don’t love each other more, we can’t just love each other. We love you though, we love you more then anything else. We would both pick you above anybody in the world, you’re our beautiful little girl, you’re our girl. You’ll never not be our daughter. We chose you years ago and we would choose you again today, everyday, for the rest of our lives. No matter what you do.”
There are big tears dripping down your moms face, you’ve seen her cry plenty in your life, Leah Williamson is known to be an emotional person, but not like this, not with this much anguish and pain in her face, never like this.
“You don’t love me, you can’t fucking love me, I’m not like either of you. I break people apart, I’m a catalyst, everywhere I go, I tear people a part, I wreck their lives. I wrecked my parents, I wrecked you guys relationship, I wrecked my own life. I’m a fucking semi-truck that bulldozes through peoples lives, just let me leave and you guys can be happy again.”
Leah takes a double take, her fists are white from how hard they are holding onto the arms of the chair she’s sat in. You’re surprised she doesn’t yell back at you, but instead of meeting your aggression with an equal amount, she composes herself.
“Bubba, do you know how much I love you, how much your mama and I love you? If you could take all of the words in the english language, it still wouldn’t be enough to describe how much we love you. And if you could gather all of those words together, it still wouldn’t be enough. What we feel for you is everything. I love you more than everything. You don’t pull people a part, you’ve made your mama and I happier than we ever would have been without you. You light up our lives everyday, I know it doesn’t feel like it, but just seeing you everyday is my biggest achievement, it’s the best part of my day. Seeing you grow up to be the person Jord and I raised will forever be the best part of my life. You didn’t tear us apart, if anything you were what kept us together for so long, because being around you made us both so happy, that all of our problems didn’t matter as much. Eventually it was too much though, it had nothing to do with you, it never will, it never did. You’re the light in our life, you are our whole universe. We just want you to be okay, you don’t have to be who you were, people change, but you need to be okay. You’re not okay right now, there isn’t anything wrong with that, it’s okay to not be okay, but me and your mama will find you help if you don’t seek it our yourself. You need to go to rehab, you can’t live your life like this, it isn’t sustainable. Drugs ruin peoples lives. I don’t need to throw stats at you for you to understand the magnitude of drug related deaths, because that’s how this will end, with you dead. You’ve been through so much bubba, you’re so strong, but you don’t always have to be strong, you’re allowed to break down, you’re allowed to have bad days. But drugs isn’t a way to fix that, it’s not a safe coping mechanism, you can’t rely on drugs to solve every problem that you have. You need to get clean. We love you so much, our beautiful girl.”
Everything hurts, your heart, your head, your body. Your eyes and head aren’t clear, it’s like there is a fuzzy haze covering everything, but you believe what Leah is telling you, she’s telling you the honest truth, and you can’t deny that.
#woso#woso community#sammykworshipper thoughts#leah williamson#arsenal wfc#leah williamson x reader#jordan nobbs x reader#jordan and leah#jordan nobbs#golden retriever leah vibes#leah williamson is mother#leah williamson fic#leah williamson imagine#woso imagine#woso fanfics#woso x reader#sammykworshipperfics
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Hello, how do you think the batfam will react to a reader with bad habits? And the reader is underage. Like at one time the reader got into not the best company or just wanted to seem cool, and now she smokes, maybe reader abuses alcohol. I'm just wondering how the batfamcan handle this.
And I apologize for the English, I am writing with a translator
❤
Alfred
disapproving english eyebrow™️
no but seriously he’s have you detoxing the minute he finds out about it. Having a nice drink at dinner with the family is fine but only if he’s able to supervise what you are drinking and how much. He’s be damned if he has to deal with another bruce
Bruce Wayne
doesn’t panic, even if his brain is screaming at him to trap you away forever and keep you from everything that could hurt you.
Calls in Dinah to talk to you about what is and isn’t safe for you because he will fuck it up and if he fucks you up after all of this progress that you guys have been making, duke will be the cause of his murder
Dick Grayson
oldest daughter exhaustion because he does NOT want to deal with another jason-smoking-to-fuck-with-bruce-and-becoming-addicted situation.
Tells you that if you don’t knock it off he will make you and is smiling while promising that you will not enjoy his methods
Jason Todd
panics his ass off
He yells at you for being stupid because he’s trying to quit and how did you get into that and why did you ever think it’s a smart idea and just panics in general
Cassandra Cain
thinks that it’s easily solvable, most reasonable
She starts you excerising with her every single time you get the urge so that you literally can’t move your arms anymore. Duke often joins in and eventually it becomes a form of bonding for the three of you
Duke Thomas
he gets you patches or helps wean you off of it because they’re a good sibling like that.
honestly to themself, takes the time to think about whether they want to keep you addicted and act like the good sibling by keeping you supplied increasing your dependence on them but then realizes that his brain is getting a little too demony for their taste and stops
Tim Drake
makes you listen as he lists every side effect of every substance that you are taking
threatens the crowd that you were with if you don’t start quitting immediately. Feels a cold quit is good punishment for being on substances in the first place
Damian Wayne
thinks it’s stupid and yells at you, considers violence but is restrained by duke and dick
#alcoholism tw#addiction tw#yandere#yandere writing prompts#platonic yandere#yandere platonic#yandere batfamily#batboy tag#yandere batfam#bruce wayne#yandere bruce wayne#alfred#yandere dick grayson#dick grayson#jason todd#yandere jason todd#tim drake#yandere tim drake#duke thomas#yandere duke thomas#damian wayne#yandere damian wayne
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Paring: Jimmy Uso, Fem!Reader
Warnings: Oral, body fluids, PinV, Minors DNI, 18+, Smutty
Word count: 2,755
Summary: What happens when you get a writers block? Do you do the unthinkable to overcome it?
You’ve known Jonathan—Jimmy Uso, as the world knows him—since you were twelve years old. Now, at twenty-three, you’ve carved out a life for yourself in your own cozy home, the result of a successful writing career that you’ve poured your heart and soul into. Yet, despite the achievements that surround you, you find yourself at an impasse with your current project, My Detox. The pages are filled with your thoughts and ideas, but every time you reach the chapter dedicated to sex, the words seem to not slip through your fingers like sand.
Frustrated, you push your glasses up onto your forehead and toss them aside, the metal frame clattering lightly against the desk. Rubbing your temples, you sigh heavily. It’s maddening how your lack of experience in the realm of romance and sex has you second-guessing every word. Watching porn to get a better sense of things? Fuck no—there’s no interest in that, and the very thought makes you cringe.
Just as you’re about to retreat into another round of self-doubt, a sharp knock interrupts your thoughts. You pull yourself away from the desk and navigate the soft carpet steps down to the front door. When you swing it open, it’s as if the universe decided to send you an angel: Jonathan stands there, a broad smile lighting up his face, his presence instantly lifting the weight from your shoulders.
“Hey, how you been doin’, Y/N?” he asks, slipping off his shoes and placing them neatly by the door as he steps inside.
You walk toward the kitchen, your heart warming at the sight of him. “To be honest, awful,” you admit, reaching for a can of cola from the fridge, its chilled surface a small comfort against your palm.
Jonathan raises an eyebrow, concern flickering in his dark eyes. “Aye, I don’t think it’s smart to drink a Coke this late. What’s got you feeling so down?”
You pop the can open, the fizzy hiss punctuating the air as you turn to face him. “That’s exactly why I need it,” you say, frustration bubbling to the surface. “I can’t even write a damn sex scene. It’s so fucking irritating.”
His laughter fills the room, warm and inviting, easing some of the tension in your chest. You lean against the counter, grateful for his presence, knowing that he’ll listen without judgment.
Jonathan strides across the room, a playful smirk dancing on his lips as he reaches for the can of cola. With a swift motion, he pulls it from your lips, the cool metal clinking softly as he holds it out of reach. “We can sit and talk about the book if it’ll make you feel better,” he offers, his voice steady and reassuring.
You nod slowly, the corners of your mouth lifting just a bit. “Alright, sounds calm, I guess.” The idea of discussing your writing with him, sharing your struggles, feels comforting. However, before you can dwell on it too long, he surprises you by tossing the can into the trash can with a decisive flick of his wrist.
“Lead the way,” he says, gesturing toward the stairs with a theatrical flourish, as if you’re about to embark on a grand adventure rather than simply moving to another room. His enthusiasm lightens your mood, and you can’t help but chuckle at his antics.
You take your time walking up the stairs, savoring the familiarity of each step, the plush carpet underfoot cushioning your ascent. It feels like a small journey, one that transports you away from the nagging frustrations of the day. Jonathan’s presence beside you makes the climb feel less daunting, and you appreciate the way he falls into step beside you, his casual demeanor bringing a sense of ease to the air.
Once you reach your room, you don’t head for your desk as you usually would. Instead, you find yourself gravitating toward the bed, a haven of comfort and soft blankets. You sit down, sinking into the plush mattress, and Jonathan follows suit, settling next to you. The bed creaks slightly under his weight, and you can feel the warmth radiating from him as he takes a moment to gather his thoughts.
For a while, there’s a comfortable silence between you, the kind that speaks volumes without the need for words. You glance at him, noticing the way his dark hair falls into his eyes and how he leans back slightly, resting on his hands. It’s a casual posture, yet it exudes confidence and openness.
“So, tell me about this book,” he finally prompts, his gaze steady and encouraging. “What’s got you all tangled up?”
You take a deep breath, feeling the weight of his attention as you prepare to share your frustrations and ideas, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he can help you untangle the mess swirling in your mind.
You launch into a rant, pacing back and forth across the room as the words tumble out in a frustrated stream. “I just… I don’t know how to even *get* them to that point, you know?” You gesture vaguely, feeling flustered. “Like, how do I make it realistic? They’re just… standing around. Maybe I should have deepened the tension, built it up more. It’s just so clear to me that there’s not enough of it.”
Jonathan watches you patiently, his gaze warm and attentive. “Where did you stop writing?” he asks, his tone gentle, coaxing more out of you.
You look at him, feeling a bit sheepish. “They were, well… basically just sitting in bed after talking about all the weird stuff that’s been happening over the last few months,” you explain, shrugging. You know it sounds flat, lacking that spark that you’re so desperate to capture.
He shifts a little closer on the bed, the mattress dipping beneath his weight as he leans in. “You mean… like this? Or should they be further apart?” he asks, his voice lowering ever so slightly, sending a ripple of awareness through you.
Your breath catches in your throat, pulse racing as you realize how close he’s gotten, his eyes locked on yours with a sudden intensity. “Yeah,” you murmur, your voice soft, almost breathless. “That… that might be it.”
“Maybe,” he murmurs, leaning in just a fraction closer, his eyes glinting with mischief, “you’ve just gotta build the tension… like this.”
Without warning, his hand finds your thigh, warm and steady, his fingers pressing gently into your skin. His touch is slow, deliberate, easing higher until his fingertips brush the hem of your sleep shorts, sending a shiver up your spine. The closeness, the heat radiating from him, everything suddenly feels heightened, more intense.
“I–Jon, what are you—” You start to ask, your voice catching as your cheeks flush. But before you can finish, he cuts you off with a quiet, soothing murmur.
“Shh, ma… just helping you with this scene,” he says, his tone gentle yet commanding, igniting a spark low in your belly that you hadn’t felt in ages.
The warmth between your legs builds, a magnetic pull drawing you toward him, your heartbeat quickening. Unable to resist, you rise to your feet in a haze, and he follows, his hands tracing down your sides as he slides his fingers under the fabric of your shorts. The sensation is electric, his touch firm yet achingly gentle.
Before you can process what’s happening, he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you back onto the bed, the world spinning as you sink into the softness of the mattress. His hands find your hips, grounding you as he settles between your legs, his gaze intense and unwavering, locking onto yours with a raw vulnerability that sends a thrill through your core.
For a moment, you’re caught in a whirlwind of emotions, your mind racing with a thousand thoughts—questions, hesitations, desires—but you don’t pull away. Instead, you look up at him, feeling the tension between you build to an almost unbearable peak, his lips so close you can feel the warmth of his breath.
Jonathan’s grin is teasing, his eyes gleaming with a mischievous spark. “Maybe… they should kiss,” he murmurs, his voice a low rumble that sends a thrill racing through you. The suggestion lingers in the air, electric, and without a second thought, you close the distance between you, crashing your lips against his with a hunger that surprises even you.
His hands immediately find your waist, sliding down until they cup the curve of your backside, pulling you closer as the kiss deepens. Your tongues meet, a playful clash that quickly becomes more heated, a tug of war that neither of you seems willing to lose. The sensation is overwhelming, your breaths mingling, growing heavier with each passing second. Desperation builds within you, and without thinking, you press your hips against him, grinding yourself shamelessly in search of relief.
Jonathan lets out a soft, breathy groan, the sound full of pent-up desire, before he firmly turns you over, guiding you down onto the bed beneath him. His weight settles over you, warm and solid, and he leans down, capturing your mouth in another searing kiss. His lips trail from your mouth down to your neck, lingering there as he nips and sucks, each touch drawing quiet gasps and soft whimpers from your lips.
He doesn’t stop there. His kisses continue, trailing lower, his mouth exploring the sensitive skin at the base of your throat before making its way down to your chest. With practiced ease, he slips a hand behind your back, undoing the clasp of your bra. He pulls it away, and in the next moment, his mouth finds your breast, his lips capturing one of your hardened peaks as his tongue teases and flicks, sending jolts of pleasure through your body.
A moan escapes you, his name slipping past your lips as your hands clutch the sheets, your body arching beneath him. He pauses for a brief second, looking up with a smug grin, clearly reveling in your reaction. Then he continues his path downward, his lips leaving a trail of heat as he kisses down your stomach, his hands following the curve of your waist, his touch both possessive and tender.
When he finally reaches the place where your need is most intense, he looks up, holding your gaze with an intensity that makes your pulse race. You feel utterly exposed, completely at his mercy, yet you’re exactly where you want to be.
Jonathan’s eyes never leave yours as he leans down, his gaze smoldering with intent. He tilts his head, capturing the delicate hem of your thong between his teeth, the metal of his grillz glinting against the fabric. His touch is teasing, deliberate, his movements slow enough to make your anticipation mount. With a knowing smirk, he sits up, using one smooth motion to slide the material down your legs and cast it aside before settling back between your thighs.
He trails his hands up your legs, leaving a path of warmth in his wake as he draws closer, his breath hot against your skin. Placing a series of feather-light kisses on the sensitive flesh between your legs, he lets his lips linger, each kiss sending sparks of pleasure through you. Slowly, he shifts to gentle licks, teasing your core with just enough pressure to make you shiver, your body arching instinctively in response to his touch.
When he finally wraps his lips around your swollen clit, a sharp gasp escapes you, and you find yourself moaning his name, “J-Jon!” Your voice trembles with the raw intensity of the moment, and your back arches as the pleasure coils within you, hot and insistent. Instinctively, your legs start to close around him, but he’s quick to press them apart, his strong hands gripping your thighs to keep you open and vulnerable beneath him.
With a quiet groan, he begins to work you over with a fervent intensity, his mouth moving in a rhythm that leaves you breathless, his tongue exploring every sensitive spot, every inch of you. His hands hold you firmly, grounding you, as he devours you, each flick and swirl pushing you closer to the edge, until every thought, every worry fades away, leaving only the pulsing heat of the moment between you.
You look down at him, your breath coming in shallow gasps as beads of sweat trickle down your cheeks. With trembling hands, you reach out, cupping his face and tilting it up to meet your gaze. Your voice is soft, filled with raw need as you plead, “I need you now… please, Jon.”
His expression darkens with desire, and he rises up, positioning himself between your legs. You watch as he shoves his pants down, his movements controlled yet urgent. He looks back at you, his voice a low growl, thick with intensity. “Say it again.”
Your body shivers at the command, his deepened tone sending a thrill down your spine. “I need you… so bad right now,” you repeat, voice barely a whisper as you feel the ache within you grow unbearable.
He lines himself up, the tip of his cock pressing against your entrance, and you can already sense just how much he’s going to fill you, even without looking. His gaze locks onto yours, filled with a challenge, his voice dripping with hunger. “One more time…” he demands, his tone laced with control.
“I… really… need you—” Before you can finish, he pushes forward, slowly easing himself into you, inch by inch. Your mouth falls open, every word stolen from you as he fills you completely, stretching you in a way that makes you gasp. He lets out a low, satisfied moan, his breath hot against your ear. “Ma… you’re so tight,” he whispers, his voice filled with awe and desire.
He begins to move, his strokes slow and deep, each thrust deliberate, making you feel every inch of him. The pressure is overwhelming, and you can’t hold back the sounds escaping you. “So big… so fucking big,” you whimper, your voice trembling with pleasure.
A growl rumbles in his chest as he quickens his pace, his thrusts becoming more insistent. “Keep talkin’ like that,” he warns, his voice rough, “and I’m gonna fuck you crazy.”
Your body arches beneath him, your own voice betraying the intense sensations flooding through you. “You’re… stretching me so well,” you murmur, your words barely coherent.
In one swift motion, he flips you onto your stomach, his hands firm as he lifts your hips and positions you to his liking, your back arching under his guidance. He plunges back into you, his rhythm wild and unrestrained, each thrust driving deeper, pulling raw cries from you with every movement. His head falls back, a series of deep, breathless moans escaping him. “Fuck, Y/N… tight as fuck,” he groans, his voice filled with a mix of pleasure and frustration.
His hand reaches up, gripping your hair and pulling you up slightly, your back arching even more as he moves inside you with a relentless intensity. Every sensation blends together, the world blurring until all you can feel is him, overwhelming you in every possible way.
“Jon… oh god… Jon…” you cry out, the sound echoing around you as he pushes you further, taking you over the edge.
The sudden sound of the door swinging open snaps you back to reality, the sharp creak echoing through the quiet room. Everything stops, and you jolt, realizing with a rush of embarrassment that you’re still at your desk, glasses tossed haphazardly to the side. The vivid daydream dissolves, leaving you breathless—and there he is. Jonathan. The very man who had just occupied every inch of your mind.
He steps into the doorway, looking at you with raised eyebrows. “I’ve been knocking on your door for a long ass time,” he says, his voice laced with impatience. “What’s going on—” His words trail off as his eyes drift downward, catching sight of the evidence of your desire: the way your hardened nipples press against the thin fabric of your top, your cheeks flushed a deep, unmistakable shade of red.
A knowing grin spreads across his face, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary. He closes the door behind him, the soft click sealing the space between you. Without breaking eye contact, he murmurs, his voice low and commanding, “On the bed… now.” His words hit you like a Drako in your chest.
His words hang in the air, thick with intent, leaving you stunned yet undeniably drawn to obey.
#wwe#jimmy uso x reader#jimmy uso smut#jimmy uso fanfiction#jimmy uso#wwe fic#wwe fanfiction#wwe jimmy uso
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hey im 20 year old female. recently i have recognised that i practice negative self talk a lot. any advices how could i stop or atleast reduce it?
how to cure negative self talk 🤍💭
the way we speak to ourselves can majorly impact our self worth and ability to reach our goals. i remember when i first tuned into my inner monologue… i was shocked and disgusted at how horribly i was speaking to myself all day every day. i had no idea! so i began researching how to stop it and implementing as much as i could. it definitely takes a lot of active work but i’m happy to say that years later i currently hardly ever have negative thoughts about myself (or others) anymore, and when i do it’s really easy to catch and deal with.
1. tune into your thoughts
it’s common for negative thoughts to run wild through our minds without us actually even noticing. the first step is to take some time to tune in and really notice what you’re thinking. the best time to do this is in “trigger” moments, like when you’re stressed, facing something challenging, looking at yourself, reflecting on a social interaction etc. how you talk to yourself in these moments will be very revealing.
2. actively reframe negative thoughts
flip any negative thought you have into an opposite, positive thought and/or speak to yourself with compassion and nurture. a common one for me when i was stressed while working and feeling stuck was “ugh i’m so stupid!” i changed it to “i’m smart and capable of solving problems”. it will feel silly at first but the more you do it, the more natural it becomes. with time you won’t have the negative thoughts at all.
3. journalling/writing morning pages
morning pages are from “the artist’s way”, which i recommend everyone read and try at least once in their life. but you write 3 pages of free flowing thoughts first thing in the morning (ideally). no self editing, anything that crosses your mind goes down. this is where a lot of your deep negative thoughts tend to spew out, and this allows you to see them, confront them, and view them as the silly little thoughts they are. your negative thoughts are from shame and fear; you need to express them and get them out. shame thrives in darkness but will shrivel under the light.
4. practice mindfulness and staying present in the moment
so often we spiral into negativity due to overwhelm. guided meditations helped me a lot (you can find them on YouTube, Spotify, insight timer etc). you’re essentially trying to re-wire your automatic brain response so you need to be able to stop running on autopilot and actually tune into what’s happening inside by gaining some control over your thoughts. it’s literally like training a muscle so is difficult at first, but you get better at it the more you do.
5. eliminate distractions and consider a dopamine detox
we numb and distract ourselves in a variety of ways. whether it’s constantly surrounding ourselves with people, scrolling social media, binge watching tv, over-using substances or other indulgences etc… these things are fine in moderation (and actually can be necessary to overall wellbeing, i think being constantly self aware can also drive you crazy and you’re allowed to have a break) but take note of how often you are actually numbing yourself out and promoting disconnection with your mind. you need to be able to face your thoughts.
6. notice how you think about others, too
i’ve mentioned before one of my worst qualities to overcome was the fact i could be very judgemental and arrogant. i actually found this was directly related to my negative self perception - after all, what we think about others is usually actually just a projection of how we feel about ourselves, our insecurities, our fears. so i also made an effort to stop judging others and instead find positives to focus on. this worked so well to overall retrain my mind toward positivity (and also started attracting much more healthy and positive relationships into my life too).
and consider tailored support if necessary
if you struggle with any of the steps on your own, a therapist, counsellor, coach, or other professional may able to be help with more personalised guidance 🤍
#it girl energy#becoming that girl#it girl#lucky girl syndrome#self improvement#self development#personal excellence#level up#glow up#positive mindset
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i have thoughts on reid x dilaudid that i feel like i’ve never seen anyone talk about before so im gonna share
spoilers for s2 ofc and cw for discussions of substance abuse
something im thinking abt right now is that presumably reid was not psychologically or physically dependent on dilaudid yet by the time he was rescued from tobias hankel. of course he was incredibly traumatized and im not saying i wouldn’t anticipate wanting relief from that if i were him, but he could have gone without the drugs. he CHOSE to take the vials from tobias when he left. so if you think about it we didn’t even see the turning point into his addiction—he had to make the choice AGAIN to shoot up at some later point. he obviously knows the statistics abt addiction and the opioid crisis. but we know he really was addicted eventually. so after tobias, he got home and looked at those vials and made that choice to shoot up again, fully aware of what he was doing and all the implications and potential consequences but he was just in that much pain.
like it makes me so so sad to think about how smart he is and how his vast intellect was not enough to stop him at any point in the pursuit of getting high and he was contending with that the whole time, aware that he should be “too smart” for what he’s doing. like he had to procure syringes, he had to consider what he was potentially sacrificing, all while he was completely lucid, and he still made a fully conscious decision that it was more valuable to get high.
or maybe he convinced himself he was just going to use them to wean himself off because it would take a major toll on your body to receive all those drugs in such a short time frame. maybe he thought he could slowly detox. which might be even sadder. or maybe he was lying to himself the whole time and knew he just wanted to give himself permission to get high again. idk.
regardless it’s really really sad to think about how much effort he had to put into doing something he knew was terrible for him and how he chose it again and again because that’s how much he was hurting. like that scene of him holding the bottles and looking in the mirror at work hits a lot harder when you realize his addiction was not something just happened to him. he can’t entirely shirk the blame. i can’t even imagine how much self loathing he would have had going on at that time
(also i am fully aware that addiction is an illness and in many regards not a choice at all, but im saying its not likely he was actually clinically diagnostically addicted to dilaudid by the time he was freed. in that sense, he did make choices which contributed to his addiction, and he had to live with that, which i think is really highlighted by him looking in the mirror like what the fuck have i done to myself)
anyways im so sad now😂😂😂😂!!!!!! this is one of my favorite plot lines it was done so dirty!!
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🌊Digital Detox + Egyptians lucid dreaming method 🌊
Idk what to put on the title of this post so I wrote digital detox and I have copy pasted the main lines.
In the ancient Egypt the Egyptians use to have lucid dreaming alot and it was extremely easy for for them not just Egyptians but it was also mention ancient Indian scriptures.
You’re probably wondering ‘what’s the secret’? The real problem is often NOT your technique. It’s actually another issue that no amount of techniques, articles, reality checks, supplements or uncomfortable masks is going to fix. It’s your ‘inner game’. Specifically, your subconscious motivation and reward circuits, and ‘dopamine cycle’. Travel in your mind for a second, to ancient Egypt.
There were no smart phones, internet connections, computer animated action movies or virtual reality headsets.
Your brain back then would have produced a healthy amount of dopamine as a reward for pretty basic things like eating, working, exploring, and taking some time to relax or meditate
Now our average attention spans are literally less than 7 SECONDS. It’s probably a lot lower than that, and It’s declining every single year with the rise of new, highly addictive and stimulating social media apps and platforms. When was the last time you meditated for over 90 minutes? Have you ever? I’m not saying you have to do that to lucid dream, but this sort of practice was very common 5000 years ago. In fact, it was weird NOT to do that. And herein lies the main problem.
Your brain is ‘fried’ with an overly stimulated dopamine pathway. Dopamine is the neurotransmitter that stimulates the feeling of WANTING to keep doing something. It’s the reason you keep scrolling through Instagram, or keep refreshing your Facebook feed to see if there are any new comments or notifications. But it’s also the SUBCONSCIOUS reason you aren’t able to lucid dream easily. In the last decade especially, there have been billions of dollars spent by big tech to essentially ‘addict you’ to their platforms. Why? Money. The more time and energy you spend on platforms like that, the more money they make. So the task has been given to artificial intelligence. The AIs often just get trained and told a few basic things: 1: Get people to spend more time on the platform 2: Get people to keep coming BACK to the platform as often as possible The ‘AI’ pays almost NO attention to what that would do to your mental health, attention span, motivation, emotions, or really anything else. Much LESS attention is paid to the effect it has on your ability to focus, or do things like, say, lucid dream. Now, the ‘dopamine cycle’ is one part of the problem, but it’s actually pretty easy to fix. There are several little pieces to what I call the ‘modern brain puzzle’. Things that just weren’t a problem 5000 years ago. You can see some of this playing out in children today. On average, children or people under the age of 15, find it MUCH easier to lucid dream than adults do. It’s because at that age, their dopamine system has not been damaged too much. This is of course changing now, as more and more children are having access to smartphones, but it’s an interesting point. In fact not only does the dopamine problem affect your ability to lucid dream, it also affects your ability to WANT to lucid dream (consciously and subconsciously). Specifically I’m talking about your motivation and focus. And you guessed it, there’s your number one cause of problems when trying to meditate, practice techniques like the WILD, or recall your dreams.
After reading this paragraph or stanza whatever,I noticed something,as a kid I had lucid dreams alot with just putting intentions.
My first lucid dream was at around 7-8 years old,and I was sinking when I realised I was dream and I tried controlling my dream and even succeeded,and I was probably there for about 10 minutes playing with underwater creatures and mermaids.
And till 7 grade I use to have alot of lucid dreams but after that I was allowed to use phone and so I was always invested in phone like all the time. By the way lucid dream was pretty normal for me and I pretty much forgot about it and never really paid attention to lucid dreaming. And then I rarely had any lucid dreams, probably 4 times ever since 8 grade and I've noticed every time I lucid dream it's always whenever I don't use any social media.
In 9 grade my phone was taken again because my mother noticed my social media addiction. And after few months I again start to lucid dream for fun easily and effortlessly but during COVID I was again allowed to have my phone and then a new laptop so now my life was revolving around social media again and for the past few year I only lucid dream whenever I don't get to use my phone more then 2 days.
Idk bout y'all but I wasn't allowed to use phones or laptop till 8th grade so the only thing I knew was TV which I only watched after coming home so like my mind was most of the te bored because I didn't had anything to keep it entertain which made it easy for me to observe around looking for things to do.
So how can you reverse the ‘dopamine problem’ and several of the other issues modern life has created? By the way: This is NOT about destroying your phone and going back to live in a cave. There are actually several powerful habits you can install, that will let you KEEP using your phone, laptop etc, but without these harmful effects. Here’s the simple solution to more lucid dreams: 1. Reverse engineer your life and remove distractions, manipulation, ‘dopamine hijacking’ and harmful blue light exposure from your daily routine (along with some other ‘problem patterns’) 2. Get inside your subconscious brain and rewire yourself to WANT to practice lucid dreaming, and to effortlessly do reality checks at the right time, without even trying 3. Learn powerful ‘all day awareness’ and ‘lucid living’ techniques that give your brain superpowers in the fight 4. On top of THAT foundation, learn the most effective techniques and concepts, use our tools to stay motivated, and experience lucid mastery within 14 days. Let’s dive a little bit deeper: First, you have to ‘reverse engineer’ the problem. This can be complicated if you don’t know what you’re doing, but we’ve laid everything out step by step for you. If dopamine addiction is part of the problem, we have to break that addiction first. Then comes your mindset, and your motivation pathways. You need to actually feel GOOD when you practice these things. I see so many people saying they’re struggling to remember to do reality checks, or they just don’t want to wake up at ‘weird times’ to practice. Don’t worry, you won’t have to. It will feel good, and you’ll ENJOY practicing these things. Next, your subconscious mind. It’s SO important to fix your internal beliefs about lucid dreaming, because the chances are you have ‘internal blocks’ about becoming lucid. They’re easy to pick up, but a bit harder to ‘unlearn’. The system shows you how to ‘unlearn’ them, and install new, powerful and self affirming beliefs into your mind. This gives your brain lots more motivation to keep trying. Now, one of the most common things I hear people say is that they can’t REMEMBER to keep doing reality checks. It’s linked to the dopamine problem we mentioned earlier, but it’s also connected to a few other psychological principles that we’ll get onto. We’ll give you a new framework to ENJOY reality checks, remember them without any annoying reminders, and actually get them to SHOW UP in your dreams, 9 out of 10 times. And then finally, we’ll build the most effective techniques, methods and concepts on top of that new, strong foundation. Of course, I’m simplifying this here, but that’s the outline.
Here are some videos that may help.
youtube
youtube
If you want to know more about it or get the steps to lucid dream you can buy the book or go through a long step to get it for free but the procedure is very long and probably only for Iphone user.
You find some good articles ways to do the 'reverse dopamine' thingy.(I donot trust my research on this topic cuz I got confuse)
You may use Adambja's tape to reprogram your subconscious and this hacking the matrix tape the comments under the video was so good and I found this tape on someone's success story. You can use this two tapes to reprogram your subconscious and of course psych-k.
This is pretty much all you need digital detox,observing your surroundings and subconscious reprogramming to change your belief or assumptions.
And this will make you even more motivated that you are working on your goals as many of us have the access of devices it's hard for us to keep up with all this method and it's not like we are always busy if we are we wouldn't be scrolling through Tumblr and Pinterest all the time. If you read the the copy pasted part you'll see what I mean.
Edit: I forgot to mention it 🥲 if we follow do this we CAN HAVE lucid dream everyday.
Egyptians lucid dreaming tea
This will be quick,so I went to my aunt's place with my mother and my aunt's ran out of tea powder/leaves so she used her daughter's blue lotus tea and after getting home I took a nap and I HAD A FOKING LUCID DREAM,so basically I didn't knew that it was the tea until I was doing some research on LD and found out that in ancient Egypt they use Blue Lotus tea and I found some review about it on YouTube and people had very vivid dreams aswell. This tea basically put you in REM which y'all probably know about.
But I don't like tea😐,so if anyone have interest you can try I honestly want to but my hate for tea is on top on the list of top 5 things I hate,you can find them online people even use Blue Lotus in vape😐not encourageling y'all to smoke but if anyone does you can.
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50 easy habits that will change your life
Have you ever been in a situation where you know you need to change your life but you just do not know where to begin from? Or probably you feel a great sense of stagnancy in life where you can’t seem to see the way forward.
If you’re one of us, then you’re definitely at the right place honey! Let’s just begin with the ultimate truth of life. If you track your entire life journey from childhood to adulthood, you would come to a realization that routines are what put you where you are right now. Think about it, isn’t habits are the one which makes up your daily routine?
Now we know the root level solution and isn’t it funny how it’s the smallest habit in your life that’s actually contributing to the biggest difference? And it’s so easily to overlook it because it seems insignificant. We go out looking for life solutions but who’s going to let you know that it was internal all this while?
All that you’ve been searching for was here all this while waiting for you.
1. Fix your sleeping schedule
2. Rise early (utilize the morning hours)
3. Pump your body with clear fluid
4. Meditate (or even pray)
5. Solitude with nature
6. Journal
7. Read
8. Self-study (research)
9. Keep your phone away first thing first when you rise in the morning
10. Workout
11. Healthy consumption
12. Join the right societies/organizations/communities that’s going to help you grow 1% better each day.
13. Listen to podcasts/audiobooks (watch YouTube videos that’s actually helping you in some sort of way amidst the entertainment)
14. Intentional living
15. Reduce mindless spending
16. Track your finances
17. Goals reflection
18. Night journaling
19. Declutter your space
20. Mix with the ‘right’ people
21. Keep an open-minded perspective
22. Allow others to express themselves openly
23. Self-care routine
24. Reward yourself from time to time
25. Step out of your comfort zone as regularly as possible
26. Learn something new everyday
27. Consume your vitamins/supplements
28. Reduce Netflix binging
29. Reduce toxic social media consumption
30. Detox your following list
31. Get your blood test done
32. Dental checkup too
33. Get a glow-up for yourself
34. Reflect your personality/attitude from time to time
35. Check up on your family/loved ones regularly
36. Declutter your wardrobe
37. Set up a vision board
38. Buy things that you ‘need’ only not that you ‘want’ (get what you want when you have that surplus amount)
39. Volunteer
40. Rest day (stillness)
41. Celebrate every milestone despite how small it is for you (for someone else it could be a big achievement)
42. Avoid using your phone during social setting
43. Set up your environment for success
44. Cheat day
45. Set boundaries for yourself and others too
46. Think in the long-term perspective
47. Plan your important days way earlier
48. Practice gratitude as a lifestyle
49. Don’t focus too much on the negative news (learn from it and leave it behind)
50. Detox your smart devices (set up space for applications that you truly need only)
Watch the full video here! Talk to you soon xx
#habits#wellbeing#wellness#empowerment#focus#success habits#mindset#healthyhabits#productivitytips#productive#productivity#consistent routine#self care routine#daily routine#morning routine#skincare routine#gym routine#self help#self awareness#note to self#self improvement#self care#self love#self development#personal growth#personal development#productivity aesthetic#aesthetic#moodboard#art
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