#sirius x barty

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

deathstar

[crimsonlovebartylus]

barty and sirius jealous of remus and regulus, thinking they are dating and whole time at their book club they are talking about "do you think he likes me?", "barty look so hot today", "your brother took his shirt off and i almost died.

[c4mrynp]

I've come to the conclusion that no matter what ship (as long as its gay) Sirius likes his men tall.

[del-stars]

the chaotic and horrifying impact of barty and sirius sharing a closet

[le-suspect]

barty is thrown into the cell next to sirius'. they both hate this and appreciate the irony of finding themselves ending up in the same place as the person they despised for years. they spend the first week arguing and insulting and screaming at each other.

and then one particular bad night barty wakes up from a nightmare and found sirius talking to the regulus star. next things you know they're sharing stories about regulus, sirius from when they were children, and barty from when they were teenage boys at hogwarts.

they end up bonding over the person they both love and their grief. they both appreciate the irony in their only source of comfort being the person they despised for years.

[lady-stardust-sirius]

Loving my jewellery I may or may not have stolen barty’s shirt

[multishipperofgaydeadwizards]

barty "baby, I'm yours" crouch jr

[junefl0wers]

best friend’s brother trope but it’s moonwater and deathstar (barty x sirius)

[cheekyboybeth]

What in the BitchKiller?

[trohpi]

the loml killerqueen

[resident-gay-bitch]

May 9; Weed

Ship; Sirius x Barty (bitchkiller)

@marauders-rarepair-fics

Sirius honestly couldn’t believe he was doing this. Going to Crouch for his much needed relaxation time. Honestly, Crouch and relaxation is the biggest oxymoron Sirius had ever heard.

But, well, desperate times desperate measures, and all that crap.

Crouch couldn’t believe it either, when Sirius came knocking out by the greenhouse, asking for some weed. It’s just that the Gryffindor guy got caught last month, slacking, smoking too much of his own supply or something. So Sirius hasn’t gotten high in over a month, and he just needs a break.

Especially from all that blasted studying Moony and Worms are doing, constantly it’s just scratch scratch scratch of quills on parchment, and flipping of pages, and humming. Oh, Sirius can’t stand the humming.

So yeah, he’s here now, getting high with Crouch because he remembered Regulus saying he delt. Because he didn’t want to get high alone, and James is on his date with Lily, and Mary’s on her date with Marlene, and Peter and Remus are studying (which Sirius would also like to dub a date since they spend all their fucking time together). And Crouch, whilst probably a psychopath, is actually funny sometimes.

Not funny in the way any of Sirius’ friends are funny. No, funny because he does dumb shit and says stupid things and Sirius can laugh at him. He honestly thought getting high with Barty would be amusing. Like a freak show or something.

But now he’s here, one and a half joints in, passing it back and forth with the bloke, and he’s actually enjoying himself. Somehow.

They’re judging people, sitting up on the stone wall and swinging their legs about, mocking anyone that walks past. They’re laughing together, not at each other, and surprisingly getting along.

At one point Reggie walked past and was instantly weirded out by them getting along, and so they both heckled the shit out of him and then spent five minutes laughing about it.

And Barty actually has some interesting things to say, and he’s much smarter than Sirius had assumed. When he popped the question as to why Barty wasn’t studying, he simply said he didn’t care, and that he didn’t study for his last exams and got full marks for all of them.

And a lot of the jokes he makes are actually quite intelligent.

And he’s not a total arsehole either. Maybe. Well, he’s definitely an arsehole, as they’re sitting here together making fun of people, but not a total dick.

He’s not being a dick to Sirius and that’s the main thing.

And he’s not bad looking. Okay, maybe that’s also a lie, he’s quite weird looking. But Sirius tends to like that. He’s captivated by his absurd lankyness, and his crooked smile, and knobbly fingers, and his scruffy eyebrows, and his hooked nose that he seemingly has had broken at least once.

And for some reason Sirius is wondering what he might look like with his clothes off.

It’s night now, and the castles dark, and everyone’s gone to dinner. Sirius is hungry, and he can hear Barty’s stomach rumbling too. They haven’t had anything to eat (besides that half packet of crisps Barty stole from a third year) since they started smoking, and are really starting to feel it.

But suddenly they’re alone, and the air is warm, and their inhibitions are lowered, and Barty’s looking at him.

He’s looking at him.

“Would you punch me if I kissed you right now?” Barty asked, catching him off guard.

“Do you want me to punch you, if you kiss me?” Sirius asked back.

Barty smirked, “Depends how mean your punch is. Promise to make me bleed?”

“I don’t want a busted knuckle.” He shrugged, leaning back against the piller.

“So you won’t punch me then?”

“I guess not.” Sirius sighed, “Are you gonna punch me for it?”

“I could.” Barty grinned, crawling over to him, “Maybe we could get into a bit of a fight.”

“You’d probably like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Yeah, probably.” Barty grinned, licking up the side of his face.

Sirius smirked, grabbing his chin with rough finger tips, “Good effort, but it would take much more to disturb me, Crouch.”

“You’re more fun than I thought.” Barty smirked, “I expected you to be a party pooper like your brother. But you’re a little insane, aren’t you?”

“Darling, I don’t think you get to decide who’s insane or not.” Sirius teased.

“Piss off, fucker. Takes one to know one.” Barty waggled his eye brows, “And don’t call me darling unless you plan on wining and dining-“

“Oh, shut up.” Sirius groaned, pulling him in to kiss.

And yeah, maybe Barty isn’t so bad after all. Besides, his weed is pretty good, so Sirius is just going to come back for more, isn’t he?

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

barty crouch jr you nasty bitch you wanted to fuck both black brothers at the same time whore !!!!!!!!!!!!

[crimsonlovebartylus]

wolfstar & bartylus on date:

Sirius: so what are YOUR intentions with my brother.

Barty: no. what are YOUR intentions with mine.

Remus:

Regulus:

Remus: what? no? i'm an only child

Barty: *whisper hisses* not anymore, you're my brother now. *turns to sirius and points* now, speak black

Sirius: well uh.. well.. my intentions are to.. be with him forever.. uh.. *blinks*

Regulus: I swear to god.

[morsmordream]

stupid, sadistic, and suicidal: the holy trinity of barty and sirius

[del-stars]

unstoppable force (sirius abandonment issues) meets an immovable object (barty avoidant attachment style)

[le-suspect]

‘that ship doesn’t even make sense they never even interacted in canon!’ have you considered that i ship characters based on their dynamics and the potential they could have had if they did interact