#she is definitely the type but i thought we were making progress

[weisscreamcake]

former coworker/friend hasn’t talked to me since i posted on ig saying if you voted trump delete me and never speak to me again which. hmm.

[caitlinbueckers]

baby daddy.

paige bueckers x reader

3.2k

like guys . I don’t even know what to say rn . this is PURE fucking filth like yas there is some exposition in the beginning and its dialogue heavy but like ✋✋ just know this is fucking porn . So sorry for anon if this isn’t up to par but the wormz took over my brain and this is all i have to show for it . Love u so much for the idea tho <3

ANYWAYZZZ !!!! you and paige buy a strap. filth ensues.

MAJOR 18+ WARNING!!!!

“babe.”

it’s deadpan, borderline exasperated as you turn your head, meeting a wildly unimpressed expression from paige that makes you snort out loud, hand coming up to cover your mouth.

in your girlfriends hand, dangling from her fingers, is a dildo of some sorts, shaped horrifically in the form of an anatomically incorrect fist, and it’s almost impossible to keep your surprised laughter from bubbling out, taking a step closer with a look of awe.

“dude, you’re kidding,”

“babe, why are we even here? like, deadass i have two hands and ten fingers, this is so extra.”

to be fair, she had a point— those two hands and ten fingers had never done you wrong in the slightest, but this was simply an act of impulse, deciding just that morning after you guys had spent the time with each others hands down each others pants, you’d declared in a sudden rush of post-nut clarity, that you simply had to see paige in a strap.

which, was met with a bit of intrigue and then, obviously, because paige bueckers is competitive in anything she can consider herself good at, couldn’t help but interrogate you in outright disbelief.

‘so, what i’m hearing is that i’m not enough?” it was said in the tone she uses when her sarcasm is over the top, and you can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of you, slapping her arm.

‘baby, stop being so dramatic, oh my god.”

you’d kissed her to silence her delusions as to why you’d even brought it up in the first place, before explaining ever so gently that it was never a matter of what paige couldn’t do, and more so about the capabilities of what she could do, and that you promised it would be fun.

truly, she was on board after you’d told her that for some girls it was hard to use, so that, ‘if she couldn’t handle it, she could give up’ — of course paige would never back down from a challenge.

“you do have two hands, and i love them just the same. i just wanna try it, okay? is that okay?” you say it in your quiet, softest voice, and maybe you’re kinda being a brat because you know paige could never say no to you when you talk like that, or when you walk up to her, tracing a thumb against her cheek before pulling her down to peck her nose.

it’s immediate the way she chases your lips, presses a quick one to your mouth before she’s rolling her eyes, “anything for my baby, i guess.” but, she’s smiling, and that feels like more progress than before.

in the end, you guys end up picking something pretty beginner level— it’s only six inches, has a dual ended pleasure vibrator nestled in the crotch for the one wearing it and due to paige’s prompt request, it is in fact purple, which only makes you laugh at the excited shimmy she does as you both walk out, hand in hand, the black privacy sack swinging between her fingers.

“thought you were so against the idea?” you couldn’t help but tease her once you guys are in the car, music already blasting— you know all her music without really knowing it, but it’s definitely something by brent faiyaz.

“yeah,” she shrugs, “until i thought about getting to fuck you with it.” she says coyly, glancing over at you with a raised eyebrow before she’s pulling out of the lot, hand secured on your thigh.

you guys don’t really get to it that night, or the next day— instead settling for the slow, tired morning sex that you guys indulge in before her practice and then after, the languid, loving type of sex you both revel in for the evening when she’s back at the dorms.

no, for some reason, it isn’t until a week or so later that it suddenly comes up— and even then, you weren’t necessarily thinking about it too hard, not until the teams all at dinner. you, paige, KK, and aubrey all sit together, and it’s really in moments like these that you love to actually participate in conversations with the team— KK and aubrey had been one of the first to welcome you in with open arms after you and paige had begun dating, so you really felt most at ease with them, even if they could be complete idiots.

not like paige was any better.

it had started with someone making a tiktok, going around asking who they’d never let their son or daughter date— resoundingly, enough people said paige, which was both parts hilarious for you, and astounding for paige.

“bro! literally i’m like, the best girlfriend, that’s some bull.” she couldn’t help but scoff, even if she’s smiling just a little, “baby, i’m a good girlfriend, right?”

you purposely take a minute to answer, pretending to think about it until she grasps your thigh beneath the table, making you snicker as she squeezes, and suddenly, you know exactly the angle she’s playing.

“girl, i don’t trust you,“ KK snorts, making a face, “you’d probably get my kid pregnant or somethin’, like—“

KK’s words make paige snort, shrugging a bit, “shoot, i mean, no wonder they call me baby daddy.” she sticks her tongue out, entirely too immature for the setting of the restaurant, but it makes you warm all over anyway— you love her, even when she’s being childish, which is pretty much most of the time.

the conversation continues after that, and though you pay attention, laugh when it’s funny and answer when you need to, you can’t quite get that out of your head— baby daddy.

it makes you think.

it’s late by the time you guys get home, and true to paige’s fashion, the door is only shut and locked for a second before she’s behind you, pressing kisses to your neck and sliding hands up your shirt, humming quietly— “i’m a good girlfriend, yeah?”

it’s not often that paige asks for reassurance, mostly because she usually already knows, but it’s why it makes it extra special when she does.

“duh.” you whisper out, tilting your head back to grant her more access while she sneaks a hand into your jeans, forgoing the button entirely. her fingers are prodding against your clit when you let out a soft moan, your fluttering eyes only opening for half a second before they spot the black sack from across the room, your own hand gently grasping her wrist to still its movements.

“baby, why don’t we…?” your tilt your head in the direction, leaning your head sideways to try and capture her reaction.

surprisingly, she looks just as interested.

it’s comes out quietly, pressed to your temple, “get on the bed then.”

you don’t waste much time, stepping out of your jeans and your top until there’s nothing left but the black, simple thong that rests against your hips, crawling back against her purple sheets with an inquisitive look on your face while she pulled the thing from its plastic package.

“remember what you said earlier?” you say offhandedly as you watch paige’s muscles flex and tighten, looping the belt around her before she glances up at you, “which part?”

“baby daddy,” you can’t help but grin, tossing your head back against the bed, “just wanted to see how true that is.”

paige scoffs, and it’s obvious she likes that, plays into it even as she crawls onto the bed, looking down at you with a narrowed glance, “how true what is? that i could get you pregnant?”

it’s almost immediate the way your body flushes at that, the subconscious squeeze of your thighs together as you look up at her through lidded eyes, “mhm. is that bad?”

“i mean,” she’s smirking though, and her hand wraps around the strap on slowly, as if simulating it to be an extension of herself— it’s really fucking hot, “it’s sexy that you even thought about it like that,” she whispers, and you can practically see the confidence rising within her at the prospect, before her eyes flicker up at you. “wanna suck me off, ma?”

it makes something within you go haywire, and your mouth practically fills with saliva as if to prepare for it before you nod slowly, propping yourself up on your elbows before you stick your tongue out, paige’s blue orbs never leaving you for one second, before she’s sighing, hard under her breath, “fuuuck.”

she gets up on her knees, running her hands through your hair to gently guide your mouth down to the tip, her teeth teasing the bottom of her lip as you slowly slid the length into your mouth. it felt foreign, heavy on the tongue, but the texture was so lifelike, it almost felt like it was attached to paige.

“shit, baby,” she sounds out of breath as she thumbs your hair from your eyes, wanting to catch every dirty look you send up to her, mouth full and eyes watering, “god, you’re such… a slut.”

it must’ve been the strap or something, that had the endless string of dirty talk spilling from paige’s mouth, not entirely too uncommon and yet it had shifted the atmosphere completely. it felt lavacious, provocative, tantalizing even.

still, it makes the arousal pool between your legs, making you practically squeeze your thighs together again and again, chasing the feeling of some type of friction as paige pushed her hips up slightly, the tip only then touching the back of your throat and eliciting the first drop of a tear from your eye.

she notices, because she doesn’t miss a thing, and is slow as she pulls it from your mouth, eyes lingering on the string of saliva that connected your bottom lip from the tip of the strap.

she’s breathing heavy, blonde strands falling into her face, loose from the usual braid she kept her front pieces in as she grasps your jaw, “does that hurt?”

it doesn’t, but it makes you smirk that she even asks, shaking your head before you lean back now, head hitting the mattress as you open your thighs, raising an eyebrow inquisitively.

“you can make it hurt,” you suggest, and paige lets out a slow exhale, a teasing grin on her smile as she grasps it by the hilt, “you’re driving me fucking crazy, y’know that?” the words are hissed down at you, spoken between her lips, chapped from how hard she’d been breathing as she rubs the tip of the now warmed, messily lubricated length against your cunt, eyes narrowed and focused as she drags it up, then down.

“you’re so wet,” it sighs out of paige as if she doesn’t even realize that she’d said it, a whine puffing past your lips involuntarily, ready to spit some type of urgency towards her, until she pushes in, finally, and you fucking gasp.

it was unlike what you’d really ever felt before— especially having never been with men or experimenting with penetration on this degree. it’s thicker than you expect, thicker than paige’s fingers combined, and your back arches upwards off the bed, right as paige grasps your hip to keep you right in place. “shh, shh— fuck, you’re so good, baby.”

“ohhh- oh fuck, paige—“ the words come out in a mess of noises, as you fling an arm over your face to try and focus on the comforting rub of paige’s thumb, the smell of her cologne, instead of the stretching, hot pressure that’s collected between your legs.

it only takes a couple moments before it doesn’t completely hurt, but the second that it does, you can finally blink your watery eyes open, letting out a soft moan at the furrowed eyebrows on paige’s face, her own lips parted as she carefully gives a shallow thrust into you, the subsequent friction of the dull, now audible buzzing of the vibrator on the other end of the dildo against her clit and it’s obvious.

it’s in the way she grunts, tongue darting out to seek attention to her bottom lip. “s’that feel good?” she’s panting already, and it makes your stomach swirl in arousal, nodding quickly as she gives another slow, but shallow thrust that sends immediate shivers up your spine, a rush of rampant pleasure up your stomach as you let out a groan, “more?”

it doesn’t take long for paige to find a rhythm— surprising considering her dancing abilities— and once she does, you can practically sense the confidence that radiates off of her. it’s in the way she wraps an arm around your thigh to hoist your leg up, higher, higher, until your cunt is on full display, and she’s leaning atop you, pressing wet kisses to your breasts as she drags her hips into you, each push making you both shudder out a moan.

“shit, baby— so fucking— so fucking wet. wan’me to fuck a baby into you, huh?” paige always has a habit of going on these fuck-drunk tangents, ones that usually send you careening over the edge in due time, but this— it makes you mewl into her ear, the thick, heavy weight of the strap punching into you, deeper than you or paige could ever reach, and it makes your hips jerk upwards, wanting more of it, all of it.

for half a second, you hoped, by some weird anatomical technique, she could get you pregnant.

“ohhh— fuck! paige, paige— pleasepleaseplease—“ what you’re begging for, even you can’t decipher, but it’s really just to make sure that she rocks into you like that again.

and she does— again and again, drool collecting in the corner of your mouth from how long your lips have been parted, and paige looks at you, delirious and flushed as she drags her thumb over your mouth, wipes away the spit and reaches between you two.

before you can figure it out, you feel her finger tracing the outside of your stretched cunt, the wetness that’s collected there as she lets out a wanton sigh, something more high pitched than what paige usually grunts out, “stretching you s’good, baby— fucking- take it, jus’ like that— fuck, wanna fuck you stupid, baby.”

it’s almost too much. your head presses hard against the comforter as paige’s hips push flush against your own, the final stab of the length being inside of you makes your head swim, your body acting upon it’s own accord as your thighs, shaking, squeeze around paige’s hips, your stomach flexing and jumping as paige gives up whatever bit of composure or control she has left, before she’s quick to fuck into you without a single strand of resistance.

it’s hot, heady, and the sweat that collects on the surface of your skin is almost like a sense of accomplishment as her face falls into your neck, your thighs pushed impossibly high to give her the best angle, as she ruts into you. the slight curve of the dildo somehow gives a direct angle to your g-spot, and it punches a shout out of you, one that’s followed with a crying whine that even you knew was bound to get you both caught.

“fffuck— shhh- shut the fuck up—“ her mouth is on your neck in an instant, other hand quick to clamp over your mouth, but the friction against paige’s clit has her bottom lip quivering, struggling to close as each of her gravelly, breathy moans launch right into your ear, and it’s clear that she’s being greedy, grinding the strap into your cunt for the effort of chasing her own high, and it’s fucking sexy.

this deep, you can almost feel the fucking vibrator, and it reduces you into nothing— fingers twine into paige’s hair, sweaty and sticky, as she fucks into you with reckless abandon, the bed frame squeaking in protest, your cunt wet enough that you can fucking hear it, can feel it drip onto the bed below, feel it coating the sheets and paige’s thighs and you think she’s about to orgasm with how quick her breath has gotten, how shaky her hips are with each incessant thrust, like an earthquake pulsing through your body and it makes you sob, because it feels so fucking good, and paige is so deep, you can feel her everywhere.

“wanna cum inside of’you— ohmyfuck- please, wanna fuck my babies into you— iloveyou, so, fucking- so fu-ucking sexy, baby, fuck.”

it’s all gibberish really, a promise that makes you turn into a pile of mush, because you can feel your cunt tighten around it— delusionally, you imagine paige can feel it too— because even her declaration of love is enough to send you flying over the edge as your legs tighten around her hips, the vibrator nestled deep against paige’s clit until she’s coming too, and it’s a glorious thing to hear— ripping from her throat in a cacophony of throaty groans and whines that mimic yours, only deeper, grittier.

she thrusts into you, sloppy and out of control until you can feel her release on your cunt, spread against your thighs, the dull vibration now pressing hot and wet against you, so much so that it makes your body flood in aftershock, pleasure wracking through you in earnest as your body twitches and jumps, every embarrassingly high pitched noise ripping from your throat, as paige’s go muddled and unintelligible against your neck.

it’s like a cathartic release of sorts, leaving you feeling boneless and jellied in the wake as you slowly return to your senses, fucked out and exhausted as you try to experimentally move your hips, but the soreness between your legs is almost unfathomable.

“shit—“ you hiss as paige finally lifts her head, her own hand slow to guide the strap from your abused cunt, and it’s clear by, not only the tired, almost loopy smirk on her face, but the redness in her eyes, the wetness coating her lashes, that she’d enjoyed herself as much as you had— and while sex between you had always been mutual, it wasn’t often you got to see her fully release like that.

“was that good, hm? did i do okay?” she’s always quick to look for approval, her hand coming up to brush the tears from your face, to pepper a light array of kisses against your lips, chapped and puffy, as you let out a tired laugh, “fucking duh, that shit was… so hot,” you trace her blonde strands, plastered to her forehead, away from her face, “don’t think i’ve ever heard you sound like that.”

it makes her cheeks red, eyes rolling with a scoff, as she lets out a quiet laugh, already trying to play it off as cocky instead of flushed, “well- yeah, ‘cause, i was watching you take my dick.” you slap her arm weakly with a snort, wincing at her usage of words, “ew, you’re so gross.”

“and you’re so pretty,” she counters, before pressing a quick kiss to your mouth.

you both don’t really try to address the fact that there was probably no way you’d both been quiet enough to not at least alert one of the girls, but you ignore it anyway.

besides, it’s only KK that ends up putting you both in a group message the next morning, sending a string of angry emojis and a text that says, ‘bye. im moving rooms’.

you both laugh, because you know she’s not, and more so, you all three know it wasn’t the first time and definitely not the last.

[sweetbans29]

Out - CC

Pairing: Caitlin Clark x Reader

Summary: You show Caitlin there is more to love and she shows you the world isn't as scary as it seems (based on THIS and THIS request)

Warnings: none that I can think of - fluff

Word Count: 3.6k

Sweetbans Masterlist

If someone were to ask you what your spirit animal was, you would say an elephant. Generally not an animal you would think of when it comes to spirit animals but to you it made sense. On the outside, you weren't the smallest - definitely the most built on the team, but on the inside you were loyal, protected your own, and provided an overwhelming sense of stability to those around you.

If you were to ask someone what they thought your spirit animal was, they would probably say something deadly or that lacked heart. But if you were to ask anyone who genuinely knew you - they would speak to your gentle nature.

You weren't a part of the Iowa basketball team but had quickly become friends with Molly who was on the team. She learned quite fast that you really enjoyed keeping to yourself. The two of you met in the gym one night at like 2AM. Molly liked going in that late to avoid anyone bugging her and you liked it for the quiet. Most nights it was just the two of you with the occasional 3rd or 4th person joining. That is what started your friendship - sharing a similar schedule. She was super easy going and never pushed you too far out of your comfort zone.

Being friends with Molly included hanging out with her team. For some reason, they had taken a liking to you and would invite you to all team events which Molly would drag you to. You weren't the outgoing type like Jada and Gabby, but complimented the team well. It was cool being able to hang out with such a fun group and they loved you because you treated all of them with love and respect.

You soon became someone the team would always want around. You would always listen to their problems and make sure they were safe. It was like you became the team's own personal bodyguard.

During games, they would want you right behind the bench. At first, you didn't understand why, but as the season progressed it was evident why they wanted you there. It all started on their first loss of the season.

Kate was typically the one who was able to keep everyone's head on their shoulders but for this game, she was having a particularly hard time doing so. She came over and sat at the end of the bench and you noticed how her demeanor was one of defeat.

You reached forward and gave her arm a little squeeze to comfort her. The second she felt your arm on hers she began to break down. She got up and started walking to the tunnel - coaches yelling at her to get back over to the bench. She just kept walking and you followed her, waving at the coaches signaling you got her (which you have no idea why you did considering you have never talked to them).

Kate is crouched down in the tunnel trying to compose herself but is having a hard time doing so. You weren't far enough in the tunnel to be shielded from the court but in enough that it was ever so slightly more quiet.

You crouch down to her level and grab her arms. You begin to take deep steady breaths which she slowly begins to match.

"I don't get it - it is like they are always three steps ahead of us all the time. Even with Caitlin's play-making, we can't keep up with them." Kate says trying to comb through all the plays that their team had been making.

"You guys have played 4 games in the last 6 days, give yourself a little break. You are tired and worn and haven't had a solid practice in the last week." You say trying to get her to see that it has less to do with their skill and more to do with their exhaustion.

You help her stand and bring her in for a hug.

"As much as you want to win, the only thing that is important now is leading your team and you could do that in your sleep. Don't kill yourself trying to win the battle, focus on winning the war." You say and she nods.

"I see why we have you close by during games," Kate says with a little smile. You smile back and pat her back as she goes to take the court again.

You follow her out and take your seat.

What you didn't see during that interaction was how it drew Caitlin's attention. She watched as you calmed down her best friend and restored her confidence. Caitlin took note of how Kate came back out encouraging the team and ready to finish the game even though it would be a loss on their record. Watching you there only added to the confusing feelings that she was feeling for you.

From then on, nobody questioned your game attendance. The girls would use you as an outlet during games when they would get in their heads. The only one who would rarely come up to you would be Caitlin.

You never questioned it as the girl held herself well most of the time - she was a feisty one on the court but once she sat on the bench would compose herself.

Little to your knowledge, she thinks about you almost constantly now. There have been several times during games that she feels like you would be the perfect person to calm her down but is nervous about showing her competitive side (not that you couldn't already see that on the floor). It wasn't until she was sick during a game and had to play that you decided to take the initiative.

It was an away game and Caitlin had been violently ill. During the game, you could see the toll it was taking on her. You heard her talking to Kate earlier about how she didn't have a choice in playing. There were people there who had paid hundreds of dollars to see her and it was also the game she could potentially break the NCAA shooting record. She was going to play.

Caitlin had an incredible opening half, allowing her to rest a little in the half. She is sitting in one of the chairs with her head in her hands. You weren't even supposed to be back there but you were talking with Molly on the way back.

Seeing her sit there so helpless had you feeling some sort of way. You grab a Gatorade and tap her arm with it.

She looks up at you then at what you are offering her. It takes her a second to register what she is looking at. You take the top off the bottle and pass it over to her. She takes it from your hand and drinks half the bottle - sighing when it parts from her lips.

You put the cap on the bottle and pat her back.

Neither of you said a word but there was a mutual understanding.

The team goes back out and Caitlin struggles. The whole team does. The final score was 79-81, a loss for the Hawkeyes.

When they came back in Caitlin was on one. Saying that their team was better than that and that they should have beaten them. She was right but that doesn't change the outcome. Once she is done going on her rampage, the fatigue sets in.

The team is heading the bus and you can see she stops and puts her hand on the wall to stabilize her. She would never admit to needing help but in this moment - she needed help.

You walk over to her - again not saying a word and wrap your arm around her waist. She leans into you and continues walking.

"You're almost there kid," you whisper to her as you approach the bus.

You guide her to the steps, letting her go up first. Your hands fall to her waist, ensuring she doesn't miss any steps.

As much as Caitlin hates being sick, she is glad she is because no one would question her rose cheeks or burning skin. Both reactions to you helping her.

When you get on the bus, she is hopeful that you will sit by her.

You don't, opting to sit next to Molly which causes the feeling of disappointment to build within no. 22.

Both Kate and Molly notice Caitlin's disappointment, taking mental notes.

Following that interaction Caitlin begins to make more of a point to talk to you and try to get to know you. She talks to Kate about the feelings that she is getting for you and Kate walks her through her first girl crush. Caitlin would always make a point to see how you are doing and thank you for being at their games, even though she still wouldn't come up to you when she needed someone during a game.

One of the bigger turning points that solidified Caitlin's love for you was when you were at the Ohio State game.

It was another Iowa loss, one they probably could have had if there was a little more cohesiveness within the team (not that you were a coach of any sorts). At the end of the game, Ohio students began to storm the floor causing a slight panic in the players to get off the floor.

You saw Caitlin and a few girls started heading back to the locker room and were right behind them when a girl from the crowd came and ran directly into Caitlin.

Caitlin goes flying on the ground and doesn't get up. Within a second, you are by her side. You are crouched next to her with your hand on her waist.

She is trying to refill her lungs with air and she does, grabs her neck.

"Come on kid, we need to get you out of here," you say and you effortlessly lift her to her feet. One of her arms goes around you to stabilize herself while Jada is on the other side helping. You are pushing people out of the way to get her back to the locker as fast as you can. She is walking which is a good sign, but she is grimacing pretty hard.

Once you make it back, you take her directly to the trainers who are there and they check her out. You don't leave her side when they do. Her eyes are closed and she keeps rubbing her head. They give her an ice pack and tell her to wait there until they load up to the bus.

You are sitting in a chair next to the table Caitlin is laying on and are looking at your phone. After the trainers leave, one of her hands comes down and grabs yours.

"Thank you," she says, eyes still closed.

"They shouldn't have let students storm the court like that, that was crazy. Someone better be talking to the school about that - that's just not okay." You say, your protective nature kicking in.

"If you weren't there it could have been a lot different, thank you." She says again.

"You know I am always here, I got you, kid," you say. "I've got the whole team."

Caitlin nods, hoping you would get her hint but you didn't.

Later that week Caitlin is talking to Kate about after the game and Kate sort of puts CC on blast.

"Caitlin, there was absolutely no hint in what you said at all," Kate says with a laugh and Caitlin hides her face in her hands and groans.

"I don't know how to do this," Caitlin says. "I have never tried to hit on a girl before, let alone anyone like her. She is perfect." The last part is muffled but Kate still hears it.

"Also, I never let anyone near me when I am sick or when I'm hurt and she has been there both times. You would think she would take that alone as a hint." CC says.

"Caitlin. That is normal behavior. Anyone looking in would say that is normal friend behavior." Kate is trying not to laugh but can't help it watching her friend figure out how to talk to you.

"What am I supposed to do?" Caitlin practically yells. "I am not going to go straight up to her and be like, 'Hi, I like you, let's go out'. That would be embarrassing."

"Maybe try taking a less subtle approach, like asking her to sit next to you when we are out or do something while we are together as a team," Kate says trying to encourage her best friend.

Caitlin nods.

The next time the team is together, Caitlin make sure to ask you prior if you are going to be there. She tries to be more bold and asks when you are meeting Molly after practice.

When Caitlin comes running up to you before you can walk away with Molly and asks if you are joining the team for their game night.

"Of course I'll be there kid," you say with a small smile.

Caitlin nods and says she looks forward to it. You continue walking with Molly and Cait runs back to the other girls.

Molly laughs.

"What?" You ask confused.

"Nothing - nothing," she says and you guys go to study before heading out to Kate's apartment.

That night Caitlin spends most of her time around you. Whether it is talking in the same group or playing with you in a game. You really enjoyed getting to know the girl and seeing her lighter side off the court. The night as a whole was fun.

As the weeks progressed, you noticed Caitlin was spending more time with you and would often ask for your help with things but didn't think much of it.

What you did notice was how she brought you out of your shell more. Not that you were always in it but you found yourself laughing more and being more involved when she sought hanging out with you. You felt lighter around her.

It was when the team decided to have a night out that Caitlin was fed up with your lack of acknowledging her effort.

The team was out at a bar when you noticed Caitlin hadn't said a word to you all night. If it was three months ago, you wouldn't question her lack of interaction but since getting to know her it had you confused.

You are standing with Molly, Jada, and Kate when you decide to ask if you have done something wrong.

"Did I do something to make Caitlin mad?" You ask. You had no intention of ever making her feel that way but she had been avoiding you so you couldn't ask her directly.

"Are you serious?" Jada asks with a laugh. Molly and Kate just look at each other.

"Wait, she doesn't know?" Jada now is looking between Kate and Molly.

"What do I not know? What did I do?" You say. "if I did something wrong I need to know so I can go apologize." You are now looking around to see if you can find Caitlin.

"I told CC to make it more obvious and she has, I mean the whole team has noticed," Kate says putting her hands up in defense.

"Wait the whole team knows?" You say. "Please just tell me, I need to make sure I didn't upset her. I know she can get really upset and there is no need her for to be stressed because of me."

Molly grabs your shoulders and looks you dead in the eye.

"She loves you dumbass," Molly says.

"I know, I love her too. I thought that was known. I love the whole team, that's why I spend most of my time with you all. And because you sort of force me," you say.

Kate jumps in.

"No, you idiot. Caitlin is quite literally in love with you. Like almost to the point of obsession," Kate says as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

You stand there confused.

"She has liked you for the past few months and thought by hanging out with you more you would figure it out...but by the look on your face it seems like you had no idea," Jada says.

You shake your head no. Caitlin likes you? You didn't even know Caitlin was into girls. Your head was spinning and between the music and the newfound fact that Caitlin likes you, you are overwhelmed.

You excuse yourself and head out the door to get some fresh air. Your mind begins to go back. Yes, Caitlin has been more present with you lately but nothing screamed 'I like you' from any of her interactions. Think harder - you tell yourself. When did that change? Maybe it was when you helped her when she got bodied on the court?

Caitlin is a beautiful woman, she has a kind heart, loves to mess around, and is beyond competitive. Her love for the game did captivate you. And her love for all the young girls she is inspiring does swell your heart.

What are you doing? Of course, you like the girl but why did it take so long to realize?

"Hey, I saw you head out - are you okay?" Caitlin pulls you out of your thoughts.

You turn to face her. Your eyes meet hers and she holds a genuine look of concern.

You step towards her and graze her arm. When you do, the hairs on it rise. Her eyes don't leave yours but you notice how her breath hitches. Your hand drops and she breaks your eye contact looking down at your hand.

She wants to ask why you removed it.

"Caitlin," you begin and her eyes close.

She knows. She knows you know. She doesn't want to see the rejection in your eyes which is why she closed hers. She doesn't know how she could be so dumb. It is not like she could stop her feelings. Caitlin saw the way other girls looked at you, not that you ever noticed but she did. They would fawn over you and it killed her. You could essentially be with any girl so why would you be with her? A girl who didn't even know she was into girls until you came along and showed her there is more to love.

Caitlin tells herself she will not cry and she stands there - eyes closed and holding it together by a thread.

You look down at her and just admire her. She is trying so hard to keep her breathing steady. Her hands are by her side and you can see she is trying to hold it together.

You gently grab her hand and give it a little squeeze hoping she will open her eyes and look at you. She doesn't.

"Caitlin, look at me please," you say in a soft tone. It takes her a second but she finally looks up at you.

"You are beautiful," you say. "Why didn't you say anything?"

She shrugs - this is your first time seeing her insecure.

"This is all new to me," she says. "I didn't know how to navigate the feelings." She looks down.

"Say it." You say, not really sure why you need her to say that she likes you. Her head whips up.

"Please say it," you practically beg. You see her swallow.

"I like you," she says. "I like you a lot. So much that it scares me and I don't know what to do with myself. And if you just had me say that to make fun of me that is so high school and is not cool."

"Caitlin, you know me better than that." You say. "I like you too, a lot."

Finally, a smile breaks on her face.

"Wait really?" She says - her confidence restoring by the second.

You nod with a little laugh.

Time begins to slow and you bring your hand comes up to caress her cheek.

"Can I kiss you?" You ask looking into her eyes once again.

Caitlin doesn't trust her voice and nods.

Leaning in, her eyes close. You stop right before your lips meet hers you stop. You take in the sight of her before closing your own eyes and connecting your lips.

The kiss isn't crazy, it's slow and questioning. Caitlin's hands come to grab your shirt, bringing you closer to her. She wants more but you don't want to rush her and pull away. A little whine escapes her lips and you laugh.

"You're cute," you tell her and she pulls you into a hug.

"Stoppp," she says as she buries her head into the crook of your neck all while trying to bring you closer to her. Your arms wrap around her waist and you lift her up slightly, swinging her side to side.

The two of you decide to spend the rest of the night talking. You find a bench outside of the bar and talk through everything that has led up to this moment and how she thought she was being so obvious. You countered by telling her you are completely oblivious.

The two of you spent hours talking - only stopping when the rest of the team stumbles out.

You and Caitlin follow behind the group. Your hand finds hers and intertwines your fingers. She leans into you with a stupid smile on her face. She wouldn't hide it even if she could.

You see Molly and Kate look back at the two of you.

"About freaking time!" Jada yells.

AN: I tried to do the best of both worlds - hope you liked it! Let me know what you think. And as always, thank you for your love and support 🤍

[kodaiki]

highlights! ⇢ luna had to stay in satoru's bedroom bc she could choke on the lego pieces :( no cameo from her today ⇢ gojo never told anyone any of that... ⇢ gojo was shocked to learn that those were y/n's first official bouquet of flowers given to her

author's note! ⇢ we love a deep conversation moment, bonding over legos <3 okay now kiss :] this was basically the talk they had mentioned in the last part!

꒰ 𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 ꒱ ↳ as a rising star in the tumultuous world of hollywood, you're handed a golden opportunity to boost your career – a fake relationship. what your manager forgot to mention? your leading man is none other than satoru gojo, hollywood's notorious fuckboy. easy? well, not exactly.

PART TWENTY ½ | NEXT

ʚĭɞ rbs and interaction always appreciated! ʚĭɞ

to join the taglist: currently 50/50. CLOSED!

[below is the written alternative to the pics above! enjoy <3]

SATORU’S HOME — 10:08 PM

the soft glow of the dimmed lights over your head illuminates the cozy atmosphere as you and satoru sit, plopped on the floor, surrounded by lego pieces scattered around you both. convenience store meal containers are pushed aside, replaced by the colorful array of lego blocks for the assembling of the flowers you’re making. 

you can’t help but chuckle softly as you clip a piece together. “who knew assembling lego flowers would be so therapeutic?”

satoru glances up at you from his craftsmanship, his face lifting into a lopsided smirk as he raises a brow. “therapeutic and much more enjoyable than a dinner at a five-star joint, right?” he asks in a sly tone.

“definitely,” you admit – but give an eye roll, too – finding enjoyment in the quiet concentration of your activity. “i mean, who needs caviar when you’ve got legos?”

satoru wiggles his brows with a drawled, yet all the same, teasing tone. “you expected caviar?”

“you brought up a five star restaurant place first! i’m just playing along,” you reply with a pointed tone, jabbing the start of a lego flower stem at him. 

the atmosphere is light as you continue your tasks, planted in place as you furrow your brows in concentration and deep thought. 

“you know,” you begin, trailing up your gaze to glance over at his progress. he’s piecing the petals to the stem of his first flower. “i expected hollywood glamour and red carpets when i signed up for a fake relationship…definitely didn’t expect this.” your tone remains light and amused, almost whimsical, as a smile tugs at the corner of your lips.

satoru snaps his fingers in an ‘aw man’ type of gesture. with mock disappointment, he juts bottom his lip out. “well, i’m sorry if you’re disappointed, princess.”

you scoff playfully, rolling your eyes at his exaggerated display. “oh, i’m terribly disappointed. no paparazzi, no fancy dinners, just legos and premade meals. what a letdown.”

you meet satoru’s eyes when you finish speaking, tone laced with sarcasm. he’s grinning at you, finding your tone amusing. as the playfulness subsides and you’re left in silence again, a more contemplative air settles between the two of you.

you don’t notice at first, but satoru sets aside his made flower and leans back on his hands, gazing at you, his blonde bangs brushing against his forehead. “in all honesty, y/n, the hollywood life can be exhausting. sometimes, a night like this feels more real that those red carpet events.”

the shift in his tone catches your attention, making you pause in your movements and look up at him more intently. you notice his eyes, usually filled with more mischief, now hold a smidge of… is that vulnerability?

“you ever feel like you’re playing a role even when the cameras aren’t rolling?” he continues, a genuine curiosity in his expression.

the legos forgotten for a moment, you nod thoughtfully. “yeah, sometimes, depending on where i am. it’s like there’s ‘public me’ and then the ‘real me,’ and they don’t always align.” you recall the amount of pr training you had to do in your agency, solely to maintain a specific image.

satoru’s gaze lingers on you as if searching for something deeper behind your gaze. “well, you’re not alone in that feeling,” he confesses in a low tone, his usual playful demeanor replaced by a rare sincerity you haven’t seen before. “sometimes, i wonder if anyone really knows the real me.”

his words make your head cock to the side in interest. “what about suguru and your other friends?” you ask softly.

"well, yeah, i guess they know me on more than a superficial level. but even then, sometimes it's like i'm still playing a character." he shrugs with twisted lips – a habit of his you realize means he's in deep thought. "don't get me wrong, it's nothing wrong with them but my guard is still up… it’s kind of like a default thing engrained in my head since i first started acting.”

your brows dip into a slight furrow as you take in his words. had acting really gotten him to a point of building a hypothetical shield around himself?

you can sense a hint of sadness in his admission, a vulnerability laid bare in his words. it’s a satoru you haven’t seen before, a crack in the facade of the confident, charming persona he presents to the world. truthfully, you didn’t think you’d ever witness this side of him.

“i get that,” you reply softly, setting aside your own lego flower to change your sitting position to hugging your knees as your chin rests against the top of them, giving him your full attention. with a bashful chuckle, you continue, “i mean– i can’t say i relate since i’m far from where you are… but i guess i can see how it’s easy to blur the lines between who you are and a role you’re trying to uphold. it’s like the more successful you become, the more layers you add to protect yourself.”

he blinks owlishly at your words, face appearing blank. you think, for a moment, that you’ve said the wrong thing but he releases a chuckle himself, head tilting to the side thoughtfully.

“exactly,” he murmurs in agreement. “you sure you’re an amateur actress?” he raises a brow, a teasing glimmer in his blue eyes.

you laugh again. “definitely an amateur compared to the hollywood veteran sitting across from me,” you tease, a genuine smile playing on your lips.

satoru visibly shudders at the word ‘veteran,’ shaking his shoulders and head as he sits up straighter.

"was it tough getting to where you are?" you ask, treading the water first, wondering if he's even comfortable sharing this side of himself to you.

"i wanna say i got lucky with my first role at just fourteen. but everything after that? I can’t even tell you which was media-driven and which was self-motivated,” he shrugs with a sigh, briefly looking away from you as if pondering.

"what do you mean?" you furrow your brows. it's no surprise he's technically a 'child' actor, having starred on a popular netflix show in his early teenhood, skyrocketing him to instant fame, a much starker contrast than the typical child actor on daytime t.v.. his viewership was massive from his debut, having scored such a prominent role. 

"after my first show did well, apparently several representatives for different projects wanted me and, well, for my management, that was a lottery. and – it's all a blur now, really – but soon enough I was an overworked sixteen-year-old starring in some show I hardly couldn't care less about, and then-"

"savage satoru," you finish for him, connecting the dots of his story.

he snorts at the cringy title. “was that really what they referred to me as?" he visibly winces, probably wishing for a nickname that didn’t sound like dated twitter jargon.

you nod, remembering how he'd blown up for acting out and being messy, as told by online tabloids on twitter and other social media sites. it’d been so many years ago but it was a pop culture moment; one of those ‘you just had to be there’ moments.

"so you remember the headlines then. i turned eighteen and started being a complete asshole on set, dating around, y’know the whole ordeal. my management had to step in and have a whole intervention with me if you can imagine it. damage control, really. they blamed it on the fact that I was eighteen – young and dumb bullshit – and sure, that had a part in it. but it has more so to do with how exhausted and overworked I was...

but despite all this damage control, i gained the label of some bad boy in hollywood who was objectively attractive and had a fanbase full of girls, so hollywood went with it. as long as i wasn't acting out on set, they'd embrace this new version of myself skewed by the media. anything for some exposure and quick bucks. and me? well, I still needed a check of my own so... i went with it. i think that's when i put up my first layer, hiding myself behind someone who wasn't me but doing it anyway because realistically, what else could I do?”

“it sounds toxic,” you murmur with a frown. 

satoru's gaze becomes distant for a moment, a hint of nostalgia or maybe regret flashing in his eyes. “yeah, it was. it's a strange thing, trying to navigate your identity in an industry that's constantly shaping and reshaping it for you."

you reach down to pick up a stray lego piece from the floor, turning it over in your hand as you absorb his words. “but why go along with it even now? couldn't you have rebelled against the image they were trying to create?"

satoru chuckles bitterly, shaking his head to himself. "it's not that simple, y/n. in hollywood, the image they build for you often becomes more real than your true self. it becomes a survival mechanism. if you're not marketable, then they find someone who is. it's a game, and sometimes you have to play along to stay in it. think about it, you’re part of the game, too."

you gnaw at your lower lip, taking in his words. what he’s saying is true. if it hadn’t been for this fake relationship, you wouldn’t have the place – the opportunities – you do now in hollywood. without you even realizing, it’s a story built by hollywood for hollywood.

satoru looks over at your expression, a rueful smile on his lips. "it's a double-edged sword. the fame, the adoration, it comes at a cost. and often, that cost is your own self.”

the room is filled with a contemplative silence, broken only by the occasional click of lego pieces coming together. the atmosphere shifts once more, a newfound understanding settling between you and satoru.

“i didn’t mean for this talk to get so gloomy,” he mutters with an awkward chuckle amidst the silence, rubbing the back of his neck.

“that’s okay,” you offer a smile of understanding. to be honest, you’d much rather have talks like these with people than a superficial one while brushing these topics under a carpet. “is it bad that i’m rethinking my whole career now?” you ask with a humorless laugh, picking up the flower again, now nearly finished.

“i’d be more surprised if you didn’t,” he retorts with an amused scoff. “but it gets better, trust me.”

“if it’s any consolation, i’m grateful i got to fake date you out of the other actors in hollywood,” you admit with a soft smile.

“yeah?” he raises a brow, partly in amusement, the other part in pure intrigue. “the infamous satoru gojo?” before you can answer, he leans back on his hands again, shooting you a smirk. “i knew you’d admit to my appeal one of these days. they always do.” he glances back at you, winking to let you know he’s partially kidding.

“oh, shut up,” you fire back, but a grin tugs up your lips. “i take back what i said.”

“too late!” he gives you a shit-eating grin, teasing you.

you can only roll your eyes, knowing if you tried to argue with him, your tone would give yourself away. 

perhaps, amidst the legos and vulnerability, a genuine friendship is taking root, growing from the foundation of shared experiences and mutual understanding.

and surprisingly,

you don’t mind it one bit. 

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[razorblade180]

A Little Space

Yang:*walks into dorm* Who’s ready for scary movie night and-

Ruby:*sitting on the floor* Yo!

Yang:Yooo! Where’s Moody #1 and Mood #2 at? Popcorn run?

Ruby:I had them step out really quick. I wanted to take a moment tell you something important. Something that might make you Moody #3

Yang:What did you break?

Ruby:Nothing! Why’s that the first thing you- sit please!

Yang walks over and sits crisscross in front of her sister like they used to do all the time when they were younger.

Yang:What’s up little sis? Did you bomb a test and dad knows? Oz planning some type of leader extrovert training?

Ruby:Ugh, he better not. I’d die on the spot.

Yang:Haha, then what’s up? You have me a little worried if you’re asking for a private-

Ruby:I’m seeing someone!

Yang:…Huh?

Ruby:*red* Jaune. I’m…I’m seeing Jaune, romantically.

Yang:Ah…okay then. Umm for how long exactly?

Ruby:A few months now.

Yang:Months?

Ruby:Time flew by! I really didn’t mean to not tell you for so long. We were sorta just figuring things out a bit.

Yang:I see, a few months huh? That’s… that’s a a fair amount of time. So are you telling me now cause you found the nerve, or has something changed? *squints*

Ruby:…..

Yang:….Ruby, be honest with me. Just how much has your relationship progressed?

Ruby:More than you would approve, but less than what you fear.

Yang:*nods* Is that so? Hmm, excuse me.

Ruby:Yang no! Wait!

Thank goodness for speed semblances. Ruby managed to get herself in front of the door before Yang, grabbing both of her hands to hold. Yang could’ve easily pulled the girl out of the way but suddenly tensed as she felt Ruby’s hand tremble violently. That alongside the pleading look in her eyes was more than enough to cool Yang’s head off.

Ruby:Please, don’t confront him over this.

Yang:Ruby, you can’t ask me not to look after you. Look, Jaune is a nice guy but I have to say something. You’ve been together for months in secret! What would day think in this situation?

Ruby:He…knows.

Yang:Wh- You told dad before me!?

Ruby:Dad actually listens to me all the way through! He’s always also way more levelheaded.

Yang:That’s- I mean… so everyone know!?

Ruby:No, but I’m sure Blake and Weiss have their own suspicions. They just have no reason to press me about it like you would.

Yang:….Is that why your hands are trembling? You were afraid to tell me?

Ruby:I wasn’t afraid. I…I know how you are when it comes to protecting me. I love it; I really do. This time is different though. *inhales* Yang, I am asking you to please give me some space with this. I don’t want to go behind your back but I don’t want you to ruin this.

Yang:Ruin? When have I ever-

Ruby:I’m excited, okay!? *blushing*

Yang:….What?

Ruby:It…It feels so weird and like a rush being around him. I’ve never cared much specifically about romance in my life and this feels crazy for me. I’m not nervous to talk about all of my thoughts. I stumble around him and laugh about it. Little things feel like a rush of adrenaline! Yeah I’m nervous but…I’m not afraid in the slightest. I’ve never this safe, this…secure around someone quite like this. Have you ever felt this way!? It’s almost like-

Yang:The sun is actually shining.

Ruby:Yeah, yeah that’s exactly what it’s like. *smiling* I can’t help but wonder if this is what mom felt for dad. Maybe I’m wrong, and I know relationships aren’t like love stories but this space have I him right now, I want to keep exploring it. I want to feel these feelings.

Yang:And you think he might change if I give him the riot act. *sighs* I… can see how that would “ruin” things.

Ruby:I really am sorry I didn’t tell you this sooner. *tears up* All of this has been so confusing and new. Also maybe…maybe I was a little scared letting you know. I just…I really do like him, Yang.

Since when did being a big sister get this difficult. Yang still can’t believe their father chose the path of peace! Definitely a youngest daughter privilege. Then again, if Ruby has told him even half of this speech, Yang could see how he gave his grace. She looked towards the ceiling away from the misty doe eyes and channeled the strength to ask a few questions.

Yang:Are you both being safe about?

Ruby:!? Of course! We’re not dumb and like I said, we haven’t…ya know? *red* We really are taking our time with things. He’s figuring this all out too! Cut Jaune a little slack.

Yang:(Okay, maybe I didn’t take that into account. Of course this is uncharted territory for him too.) Fiiiiiiiiine! Fine! I won’t talk to him about it, for now!

Ruby:Really!?

Yang:But you still have to tell him I know!

Ruby:That’s fine. He knows dad knows. I also talked to him about telling you. Jaune actually encouraged me for this.

Yang:That’s a bold tactic.

Ruby:He has seven sisters. I’m positive on some level he gets where you’re coming from.

Yang:Seven!? Actually…yeah, yeah that makes sense.

Ruby:Are you still mad at me?

Yang:I was never mad, ya little-

She pulls Ruby into a big, warm hug. It kinda hurt to think about how big her sister was getting. Then again, maybe this is how dad felt whenever she confronted him about needing some more space? The more she thought about it, it made sense why he was relaxed with Ruby. It would be cruel if both of them gave such a strong response to her feelings.

Yang:I love you so much. Remember, you can tell me anything.

Ruby:I know, and I love you too.

xxxxx

As always, scary movie night happened; although Yang couldn’t really say she was watching the film. As her teammates and friends from JNPR watched the film, her gaze occasionally shifted downward towards the floor at Jaune and Ruby, who shared a popcorn bowl. Funny, have they been sitting that close to one another all this time?

Yang watched the blonde jolt as another jumpscare caught him off guard, earning a stifled giggle out of Ruby while he smiled sheepishly. Lightly, Ruby leaned against him and continued watching the film with a grin that warmed Yang’s heart.

Yang: (Perhaps some space isn’t so bad? The view from here is pretty cool.)

[mirai-e-jump]

TV Guide, 9/6/2024 Issue ft. Kamen Rider Gavv Cast Members (translation below)

Publication: August 28, 2024

Chinen Hidekazu x Hino Yusuke x Miyabe Nozomi

Chinen: Shouma, who I play, is a young man who loves eating. He actually comes from another world, and while he's friendly, there's an elusive side to him, so if you take your eyes off him, he might end up someplace else.

Hino: Karakida Hanto, who I play, is a freelance writer who's not afraid of taking risks. During the audition, they never gave me a detailed setup for the motifs or roles we'd be playing. The only thing I knew was that one character was a glutton, and that the other was a cool character. How was the audition for the female character?

Miyabe: I play Amane Sachika, a gyaru, but that wasn't disclosed to me during the audition…..

Chinen: Really?!

Miyabe: The impression I had was that she was a reliable person. Then, during the final audition, the Director told me, "Act alittle more like an aunt from Osaka."

Chinen & Hino: Ahahaha!

Miyabe: I wondered what kind of character she'd be, but I was surprised to find out that she was a gyaru.

Hino: I was together with Hide (Chinen) during the final part of the audition, and he was really interesting. We've got so many stories. Which one was your favorite?

Chinen: There's none in particular I like (laughs).

Miyabe: I wanna hear them! (laughs).

Hino: For example…there was "A," the gluttonous character, and "B," the cool character, and the Director would assign us by saying, "Alright, next, you play role A, and this guy will play role B," but when Hide was told, "Alright, you're next," he took role A without asking.

Miyabe: Eh! (laughs).

Hino: I couldn't help but say, "This kid's a genius."

Chinen: I cringe thinking about it now (laughs).

Hino: (laughs). Still, I thought, "These are the kind of kids who get chosen." I really felt that he was different from the other kids. I guess I've been drawn towards Shouma since then. That's why when I found out at costume fitting that Hide had been chosen to play the main character I thought, "Wow! That's great! I knew it'd be him."

Chinen: "I knew it" is what I also thought about Yusuke-kun. When I actually did a face to face performance with Yusuke-kun at the audition, I thought, "It'd be very easy to perform with this person"……

Hino: (said happily) Really?

Chinen: Yeah. That's why I wasn't surprised at all when we met at costume fitting. There were countless people left, but I knew that if I was chosen, the other person would likely be "him."

Hino: (totally embarrassed) Damn. No, that makes me happy! I think that the relationship between Shouma and Hanto will gradually deepen as the story progresses, so I hope you'll look forward to that part as well.

Miyabe: What I liked about the script was that even people who seemed cheerful were complex, and they grew as they struggled with themselves. I personally found these aspects encouraging, and I hope that it'll be conveyed to the viewers as well.

Chinen: When I saw the completed first episode, I thought it was really interesting, and I felt that I presented it with my whole heart. I hope that lots of people will watch it! _

Q: What sweets would you compare each other to?

Chinen: Miyabecchi is a marshmallow. She gives off the feeling of an older sister who watches out for us and embraces us with her softness. As for Yusuke-kun, he's fugashi.

Hino: Isn't that old fashioned?! Wait, there's only a two year gap between us! (laughs).

Chinen: He's well informed, and since he talks alot with his superiors, I chose fugashi since it's a veteran of the sweets world.

Miyabe: I think Hide's definitely a marshmallow.

Hino: Right, it's so him.

Miyabe: Isn't it? He's very soft, and I feel like he could absorb an impact (laughs). As for Yusuke-kun, he's dagashi.

Hino: I guess I'm that type after all (laughs).

Miyabe: It's because there's a familiarity to him (laughs).

Chinen: Ah~ I see.

Hino: I also think Hide's a marshmallow. He's fluffy, pure, and positive. His skin is also like a marshmallow (he pokes his cheeks). As for Miyabecchi…she's both girly and not girly at all, and is also quite mature. I wonder what she'd be.

Chinen: A high quality confection?

Hino: Right. Like a millefeuille! It feels like there are many sides to her, as it also has lots of layers.

Miyabe: Ah, I'm glad~ (laughs).

[tizahfanfics]

This POST reminded me of a fic I wrote a long time ago. It's basically Gordon and Scott on the beach (but it's angst, because... it's me, so it's always angst).

Link AO3

💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡💙🧡

MURKY WATERS

"I was lost in a sea of despair, but you pulled me back..."

"You wanna surfing today?" The question came out of nowhere.

Gordon blinked and stared at his brother. It was ridiculously early, even for his morning habits. Scott stood in front of him, wearing this weird, expectant look.

"Scott… what?"

"I'm heading out to catch some waves. Thought you'd wanna come along."

"Sure, just—give me a minute. But, uh, why so early? It's gotta be freezing out there." Mornings on the island were always chilly, with winds that cut like a knife. Not exactly Gordon’s ide.

"What? Thought you liked a little challenge. Or are you chickening out?" Scott smirked, looking way too amused for Gordon's taste.

"No way! Just didn’t think you’d wanna hit the waves this early," Gordon said cautiously, choosing his words like walking on eggshells. Scott had been… touchy lately. The wrong tone or phrasing could set him off.

"Fine. I’ll meet you on the beach." Scott spun on his heel and left, leaving Gordon momentarily stunned. Well… maybe this was good. Maybe Scott was finally feeling more like himself. Gordon loved surfing with Scott, so… why not?

Gordon got dressed quickly and headed down to the beach, grabbing his board on the way.

It was definitely cold, just as he'd thought. Gordon considered trying to talk Scott into waiting a little longer, but when he spotted his brother already out in the water, grinning ear to ear, he let it slide.

Bracing himself for the icy waves, Gordon followed Scott into the surf. The wind was sharp and biting, and the water was frigid. Hopefully, Scott would realize this soon and they'd both head back in.

They paddled out and caught a couple of small waves, Gordon staying close enough to keep an eye on his brother. If anything went wrong, he was ready to haul Scott back to shore, no questions asked.

"Hey, remember that time at… what was it, Malibu?" Scott paddled closer, his nose red from the cold and his eyes bright with energy.

"Yeah, I remember. You didn’t wanna go, but then we couldn’t get you off the board," Gordon said with a laugh. Back then, Scott had been down in the dumps for some reason, so Gordon had dragged him out to Malibu for a few days with some friends.

Scott had initially bailed, saying he had "stuff to deal with," but right before Gordon left, he showed up, packed and ready.

"I didn’t wanna go," Scott admitted, his voice quieter. "That was the day Erin dumped me."

Oh.

Gordon hadn’t known that. He’d met Erin a few times, but never thought their relationship was anything serious. She was the free-spirited type, not someone who seemed interested in long-term anything. Besides, Scott had been gearing up to head to the Air Force Academy anyway.

"I had no idea," Gordon said, his brow furrowing. "Why didn’t you tell me? And why'd you decide to come, then?"

"It was… something she said," Scott replied, trailing off as he stared at the horizon.

Gordon waited for him to elaborate, but Scott just stayed there, lost in thought, before suddenly paddling further out.

"Hey, you just gonna sit there? That wave looks killer!" Scott called, breaking Gordon's train of thought.

Gordon smiled at his brother's excitement before trying to follow along. Scott wasn't making sense today;but after weeks of having a very quiet and untalkative brother, this seemed like progress. Gordon hoped it was.

He watched his brother advance and felt a tingling in his stomach that told him not to lose sight of him.

"Wait! Don’t go too far!" Gordon yelled, but Scott kept paddling toward a swell forming in the east. Gordon couldn’t help but feel like a worried parent on a beach trip with their kid. Usually, that was Scott’s job.

Apesar do frio, Scott parecia estar aproveitando o momento. Era bom ver seu irmão relaxando.

He enjoyed the sea. The day was truly beautiful, the cold already beginning to give way to comforting warmth as the sun rose in the sky.He looked around, not wanting to lose sight of Scott. Everything seemed so normal, just like old times.

A strong wind began to blow like the howl of a wounded animal. Gordon felt a strange chill, his Squid sense suddenly began to beep. He didn't know what it was.

His brother continued forward and Gordon realized he was heading in an unsafe direction. Stroking faster he began to move forward to get closer to Scott. His brain told him he was just freaking out over nothing.

But something in Gordon’s gut told him he needed to get Scott out of the water. Like, now.

He paddled faster, trying to catch up. Scott shouldn’t be pushing himself this hard—his body was still recovering.

"Scott! Slow down, man. Save some energy for the next set…" Gordon tried to keep his tone light, but his concern was bleeding through.

Scott ignored him. When the wave came, he rode it perfectly, and Gordon followed close behind.

Being inside the wave was exhilarating, like flying. Gordon thought maybe that was what Scott was chasing—freedom.

When they surfaced, both gasping for air, Gordon swept his wet hair back and glanced around for Scott. He nearly jumped out of his skin when Scott popped up right in front of him.

Scott’s expression was… strange. A mix of fear and uncertainty.

"You good?" Gordon blurted out before he could stop himself.

Scott frowned, like he was trying to work out the question, then turned back to the horizon.

"Yeah. I’m fine," he finally said, but his tone didn’t match the words.

"Scott, why don’t we head back now, huh? My leg’s cramping up a bit. Don’t think I should risk it," Gordon said, hoping to appeal to Scott’s protective instincts.

Scott gave him a long look, and for a second, Gordon thought he’d agree. But halfway back, Scott stopped abruptly.

"You’re lying."

"What?" Gordon asked, caught off guard.

"You’re lying! I’m fine, damn it! Why is everyone acting like I’m made of glass?" Scott shouted, his voice shaking as he tossed his surfboard aside.

"Whoa, hey! Where’s this coming from? We’re just worried about you!" Gordon said, letting his own board float as he reached for Scott.

But Scott wasn’t having it. "Worried? I’m sick of it! I know what I can handle, Gordon! I know what I'm capable of, I'm not broke! Can I at least ride a wave? ....I need this. Either that or would you rather I take a plane to relax? I—" He laughed, a sharp, bitter sound that made Gordon’s chest tighten.

"Scott! Calm down, man. Let’s just—"

But Scott was already paddling back out, ignoring him completely.

Gordon’s heart was pounding. Something was wrong.

"Scott!" he yelled, picking up his pace as a wave rolled over them. When Gordon surfaced, Scott was gone.

Panic hit him like a punch to the gut.

"Scott!" Gordon shouted again, spinning in the water. His pulse thundered in his ears.

Without a second thought, Gordon dove under, scanning the cold, murky water. It wasn’t long before he spotted a flash of blue—Scott’s wetsuit.

Scott lay motionless in the murky water.

Fuck fuck fuck!

He swam faster than he ever had, grabbing his brother and hauling him toward the shore.

By the time they hit the sand, Scott wasn’t breathing.

Gordon’s throat tightened, but he shoved the panic aside. His training kicked in;ignoring how much he himself was shaking.

Minutes felt like hours until, finally, Scott coughed and spat out water.

He couldn't believe what had just happened. He wanted to cry, from relief, from fear, from all the feelings that were boiling inside him.

Gordon quickly came to his senses upon hearing the distressing sounds of his brother. A mixture of coughs and sobs shook Scott's body, making Gordon's heart tighten even more.

Pulling his brother so he could breathe better resting on his chest as he calmed his own nerves from the terror he felt when Scott disappeared into the water.

"Shhh, you're okay. You're okay bro, we're okay." He knew they were far from okay; but somehow they would get there.

When his brother's rapid breathing and sobs finally calmed, he pulled Scott so they were face to face, still supporting him with his hands on his shoulders.

"What's gotten into you?!" ?" He didn't want his voice to crack, but he couldn't help it. It would give him many nights of nightmares.

Scott looked away and frowned, as if understanding had only just dawned on him.

"I don't know…oh my gosh. Fuck! I'm so sorry." He began to speak, his voice low and muffled by his own hands, which were shaking uncontrollably.

"Damn it! You don't do that Scott. You don't go into the water and underestimate it like that, ever. And you can't do that to me! You scared me to death." He stood up, needing to breathe and calm himself. "If I hadn't found you, you would have died! Do you see that? We just got you back…you can't-" Then everything came crashing down; he could no longer contain the tears that insisted on falling suddenly.

Scott tried to get up, but his legs betrayed him and he almost fell back into the sand if Gordon hadn't rushed to catch him.

They locked in a desperate embrace as if they could put all the broken pieces of themselves back together with just the endless love they felt for each other.

Gordon held his brother tightly. Scott was shaking under his hands. For a minute they stood there, breathing. Until Gordon realized that Scott was now shaking badly and still a little panting. He maneuvered his brother to steady him, and they both began the slow walk toward home.

"Let's go home, Scotty. Let's get you warm again." His brother said nothing, but squeezed his hand in acknowledgement.

You don't have to run, Scott. You can lean on us. We'll get through this, together."His brother made a very timid sound of agreement beside him. Gordon accepted this, it was the best he could ask for at the moment.

Scott had only been home from the hospital for a month. He looked much better physically, but Gordon knew there were unseen wounds that would take longer to heal.

"Thank you Gords" His brother thanked him, softly, almost a whisper.

"Anytime, bro. I'm here for you, whenever you need me. But I'd rather you didn't pull an Aquaman, my heart is fragile."

[thygoddessouijathicc]

Ok COTL Post

I feel like of all the bishops Heket doesn’t get enough recognition.

Spoilers. Obviously spoilers

She’s the second major boss fight so we don’t see much of her, she doesn’t have a bad design but it’s not as memorable as like… Leshy. The game doesn’t talk about her as much as Narinder or Shamura because she’s less involved in the main plot and let’s be real when do you ever need to go back to ANURA it’s unlikely you need mushrooms so badly that you can’t just grow them.

But I’d argue that Heket is actually like… really interesting and important. Though less is clearly stated so I’m speculating here, keep that in mind.

Heket has a domineering and aggressive personality, and tends to almost act like an unofficial leader of the bishops.

The bishops SEEM equal like in theory, but in practice it’s pretty clear that Shamura was the leader when they started and whatever they did others went along with. Now, since Shamura is still around but definitely NOT what they used to be, it’s pretty clear they aren’t leading the way they once did or at least not as actively as they once did. The bishops would be left in a power vacuum without them and Nari and let’s be real. Kal is a coward who will back down easily under the slightest pressure, Leshy is absolutely not leader material and it doesn’t even seem like he’d be all that interested, the only one of the bishops who could be leading that makes sense is Heket, even if Kal or Leshy were to try to take on a leadership role it’s likely Heket would overpower them.

And it’s kinda what we see in the game honestly like Heket commands her siblings a bit. She tells Leshy to deal with you early on and later tells Shamura to rest because she and Kal will handle it “won’t we Kallamar?” The dialoge implies Heket is definitely the one calling the shots, telling the other bishops what they should be doing even if they already are aware. The dialoge frequently being against getting Shamura involved also tends to imply to me that 1, either she thinks they aren’t needed, or 2, which makes more sense with the comment to rest, Heket questions Shamura’s ability to do this. And the other characters tend to agree

I don’t know if it’s just a me thing but every time I kill Heket I feel like I’ve largely beaten the old faith. Kal and Shamura are still around but… what are they going to do? Kal is a coward who bargains with you to leave him alone, and Shamura is definitely not what they once were, not to mention there’s a coldness to their dialoge like they don’t really care about survival they just want to follow through. Heket was the one commanding her siblings to act, she was the one keeping the old faith moving. Once she’s gone the game may get harder but it feels like the old faith is just rallying for one final stand rather than actively making progress towards destroying you. Though this is just a vibe.

Beyond just being probably the unofficial leader Heket is authoritative and loud and capable of telling her siblings what to do clealry but at the same time… she’s not Shamura. She’s not a genius, she’s a thug. Heket is hotheaded, violent, and overall gives the impression of “attack first ask questions at a far later if I feel like it’s necessary”. She’s not a great leader who has all the answers, she’s again, like a thug trying to take over as leader. She thinks she is the next most qualified and honestly she might be, but it’s her anger and her lack of consideration for situations beyond “kill” or “cause famine” or “punish with violence” doesn’t necessarily make her the best leader.

Heket is so hot headed and angry that she doesn’t consider other options beyond outright killing the lamb really, Leshy doesn’t seem like the type to think that far, Shamura doesn’t seem to be trying to stop you, the only one who does think of another option is Kal he tries to make peace. Because the lamb CANT DIE. That’s obvious by now. Leshy doesn’t seem to give that much thought, and Shamura understands but doesn’t care. But Heket seems to believe if she kills you hard enough, you will fuck off. It’s even seen in her purgetory dialoge that she’s still just killing you until you stop. So are the others but her take on doing it is less because she has to more because it’s what she thinks will work. Heket doesn’t know how to handle a problem she can’t kill. And despite her being the most leader ish of the bishops who still care to lead, that makes her a bad leader.

Heket is a thug taking the place of a great leader trying to be just as great as they were, but she simply isn’t. Heket is not Shamura she never will be and violence is really the only order she knows how to give.

You could argue the bishops may have always functioned this way but that doesn’t seem to be the case. Shamura may be a god of war but they’re also smart. And kinda sentimental. They lock Narinder away because you can’t kill death (and honestly I think they also didn’t want to). You know what else you can’t kill? THE LAMB. Shamura has shown they know how to handle a being that can’t be killed and maybe it’s a bit different but I like to think if you can chain away a kicking and screaming god you can chain away a tiny sheep with a knife. Shamura in the past when they led the bishops, was smart.

And this is kinda a reach… but you know what plan ISNT smart and seems to be all “kill first think later”. The lamb genocide. Shamura understands how Narinder works enough to know you can’t kill him, and he is just chilling in the after life, I personally believe Shamura is not making any attempt to stop the prophecy because as they say “Though no longer be wise, I am no fool.” Shamura dreads the end but they cannot stop you they know this, they’re here to prepare you. I don’t think Shamura ever thought they stopped the prophecy because all the lambs were dead. They know better. And it really doesn’t sound like the kind of order they’d make more one they’d accept. But which of the bishops is notable for the belief that all problems can be killed. Heket.

I strongly believe that HEKET is the bishop responsible for the idea of the lamb genocide. I believe she hears the new prophecy, and decides to do what she knows best. Violence. Shamura seems to have an understanding you can’t just FIGHT fate, but Heket… Heket thinks if you kill something that will eternally resurrect enough times, it’ll stop. Heket’s logic throughout the whole game that if she kills you hard enough she wins is the same logic as “if we kill all the lambs the prophecy won’t work” both ignore that you can’t fight death with more death, both don’t really give thought to the situation, and both make no sense if you think about it. And this is a big part of why I think Heket is important, it’s her fumbling the bag that leads to the games events and her own death. Heket is a thug in the role of a leader who leads like a thug.

And damn if it’s not kinda interesting. I feel like the game overall suffers from the lack of dialogue and context we get, especially OBJECTIVE dialogue all we really know is what happened not in depth on why and how for the most part. And no one suffers more from that to Heket in my mind because she’s a character who tries to be a leader and accidentally causes the old faith to fall through poor decision making but we don’t see that so blatantly in the games.

If I were to have one critique of COTL IN GENERAL it would be that as strong as the story is we don’t get enough of it. The bishops essentially loose all interesting details about them once you beat them. It’s a product of the gameplay type it’s not a story driven game it’s a rougelike with a town builder attatched so really only those details matter, there’s not a linear progression so heavily enforced sure you get new areas and things to do but in terms of story you do it, it’s done, you go back to the gameplay loop. It’s just how the game works. It’s a game meant to be continuously played not a storyline that ends it just stops having a story at one point. I don’t dislike this and think it should have been a fundamentally different game I love it and its gameplay is amazing, but the story and characters do suffer from not being given screen time and I think Heket is a good example of that. She hardly gets any. And I feel like she’s overlooked.

Then again this is all speculation I’d love to see what others think!

[zeroseuniverse]

User

WC: 1.2 K Pairing: Kim Seungmin X reader Warnings: Angst, breakup

Navigation

It was expected, how could it not be? Dating an Idol would never have been easy, but she at least thought it would be the fans she was battling and not the other members. So when she had heard Changbin explain to Seungmin that all of them thought she was using him, she didn’t exactly know how to approach the situation, she could come out from behind the wall and act like everything is okay, she can walk out of the dorm and away from the boys where she’s not wanted, she can go out and confront the issues head on, or she can excuse herself politely and ask Seungmin to speak to her in private. The latter seemed like the best option for Seeungmin, he preferred when she was upfront about her feelings, but she felt like maybe she could change their minds. So she waited, she didn’t distance herself, it would defeat the whole purpose, but she didn’t go out of her way to make time for them as well. 

The tension lasted months, and it was visibly taking a toll on Seungmin who felt like he had to divide his time between his lover and his group mates. He refused to mention her to his groupmates not willing to start that argument up again, and honestly he would’ve happily kept them physically separated if they didn’t purposefully crash their dates without his permission.

“All I’m saying is, you definitely make more money than her. You’re always paying for the dates. How can you be sure she’s not just using you?” Hyunjin asked, not knowing that the girl in question was just outside the door having come to bring Seungmin his lunch.

“I pay because I want to. And don’t talk as if you know her.” Seungmin frowned, looking down at his phone as he types out a text to his girlfriend asking how far out she was.

“You’re an Idol! She could totally just be using you. She doesn’t belong in this world.” Changbin said, he and Hyunjin seemed the most adverse to Seungmin’s relationship, Felix had tried making her feel welcome but she just gave him a smile and stayed quiet usually, Han naturally didn’t like having her around but it was just because his anxiety spiked everytime the thought of Seungmin getting hurt crossed his mind, Lee Know didn’t care about her, whether she was there or not he just ignored her existence, Chan had nothing against her but avoided her to avoid any issues, Jeongin didn’t hate her per say but he did find her odd, nobody was just naturally that nice in his opinion.

“You don’t know her! You never took the chance to know her so stop making assumptions based on your own fears!” He shouted and would have continued if the door hadn’t opened revealing a teary eyed woman holding a bag of food, she approached her boyfriend without sparing a glance at anyone else. The way she was acting was enough to tell Seungmin exactly how she was going to handle this situation so he quickly gripped her wrist to try and keep her there but she simply pressed a long kiss to his lips before nudging his sad figure away from her.

“Please don’t do this.”

“It’s okay, If it’s meant to be we will be.” was all she said before parting ways and walking past the seven stunned members, all of them confused as to why a gold digger wasn’t trying to force their way into their lives further.

–

She hummed the tune of Case 143 softly as she packed the canned goods into the boxes to be shipped. She was making a lot of progress, especially since her brothers were finding any excuse possible to be near her after the breakup.

The door opening snapped her attention from her work as well as her brothers from the kitchen area, he peered through the window curiously. The entrance of two men made her head tilt in confusion.

“What are you two doing here?”

“The past month Seungmin hasn’t been himself,” Felix murmured, earning a nod from the woman. She knew. Of course she knew she had kept in contact with him and listened to all of his weeping over the situation, “So we did research.” 

“We came across this place and read everything we could about you. Jeongin’s reasoning was he didn’t think anyone could ever be that nice but he was proven wrong, we all were. You were with Seungmin because you truly loved him.” Lee Know sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked around, taking in the different projects in production, so many donation boxes sitting against the wall, clothes, food, blankets so many things scattered about in a mess of organized chaos as the woman worked to make it all ready for shipping.

“Yea well, everyone makes mistakes.” Was all she said, lifting the box and moving around two to make her way towards her other brother who was waiting nearby to carry the next box out to the truck. 

“Is there a way you can forgive us, I really don’t think Seungmin should be punished for our mistakes.” Lee Know tried to reason, earning an eye roll from the family members in the room.

“He’s not being punished.”

“You broke up with him, I’d call that being punished.” Felix commented.

“Yeah well you all tend to make plenty of assumptions, don’t you?”

“This isn’t an assumption, it’s a fact.”

“Is it?” A new voice chirped, making everyone turn to face her oldest brother who had jut entered with Seungmin by his side, the younger boy glaring at his friends who keep butting into his personal life.

“Seungmin?” Felix asked in astonishment, not thinking the two were still in contact, “Look we’re just trying to talk her into talking to you again.”

“She has been talking to me, every night, she calls me every time I have a nightmare, everytime I’m stressed, everytime the tension gets too much and she listens. Despite all the jabs and taunts all of you threw she stayed. We broke up because you guys were too close minded to think anyone could ever love an idol without other intentions. You guys didn’t even give her a chance, well Felix did but everyone else? You guys hated her right off of the back.”

“We were just trying to protect you.” Changbin’s voice spoke up making the woman tense turning to the door to see the other 5 gathered in the door.

“I didn’t need protection, have you seen her? She’s quite literally an angel.”

“We see that now but we were cautious at first, it’s normal.”

“Oh stop trying to rationalize your prejudice, just because she’s not an idol doesn’t mean she’s any less than you. She’s been through more pain than you’ve experienced, that’s why she built this place. To help people who go through what she has gone through. Better yourself. Because that is the only way she’s ever going to get back with Seungmin. She won’t put him in the position where he needs to choose again. So fix it. Because those two were the definition of puppy love and quite frankly I could punch you for taking that away from her.” The eldest brother spoked, patting Seungmin on the back before moving to work with his other brother in the kitchen.

“You guys know where the door is.” She said simply, motioning for the uninvited 7 to leave before turning to her ex with a small smile, “Come on, the puppies are back here.” 

And as the 7 watched the two leave the room, looking lighter as they stood together, their hearts shattered taking in the strain they had placed on their bonds.

[yuesya]

The sky is dark.

Even during daytime, the sky is dark, almost as if it were evening. A perpetual twilight. It’s a sight that is very much unnatural, yet there’s very little that is natural about the world nowadays. Not since the day when a horde of cursed spirits suddenly manifested in the heart of New Shinjuku with no warning whatsoever, promptly plunging the freshly-rebuilt city into chaos. And almost as if it had been a signal of sorts, similar incidents had swiftly spread across the globe in the days that followed.

Armageddon, some called it. The End of the World. As the catastrophe progressed, the environment itself changed as well in reflection of the disaster ravaging the now-hostile, dangerous world.

“So this is where you’re hiding, huh?”

Shiki turns around and cranes her head to look upwards. “… Satoru-niichan?”

Her cousin pats her on the head, and plops down on the stone ledge next to her with a gusty sigh. “Needed a break?”

Shiki doesn’t respond to that, instead drawing her legs closer to herself and burying her face into her knees. She receives another headpat from her cousin.

“I get it,” he says. “It’s a lot. Sorcerers aren’t really supposed to do much aside from just killing cursed spirits, but look at us now –shining paragons and defenders of the last, greatest bastions of humanity. What a joke, right? Like, what do I know about running cities or maintaining infrastructure or resource allocation?”

“People are grasping at straws,” Shiki says quietly. Between the two of them… it’s definitely Satoru-niichan who bears the heavier burden. But even so, despite all the responsibilities that he’s laden with, he still does his best to look out for her in moments like these.

The knowledge lights a spark of warmth inside her chest.

“Yeah, they most definitely are,” Satoru-niichan sighs. “And sorcerers happen to look like they have the longest straws, no thanks to the entire mess back in ‘18.”

“… Geto-san’s Cursed Spirit Manipulation would’ve been nice to have right now,” Shiki props up her chin with a hand. Considering that the entire world was overrun with cursed spirits, his cursed technique would’ve been an excellent counter.

He might even be the new ‘Strongest.’

… Although, if Geto-san were still alive, he probably would’ve set off to make his own stronghold, one that strictly, specifically only protected sorcerers.

Shiki sighs.

“Oh, and you know what else would be nice to have? A good bowl of cream anmitsu.”

The girl blinks in surprise at the sudden non-sequitur, and gives her cousin a side-eye.

“What? I thought we were indulging in a bout of wishful thinking here,” the young man sticks his tongue out at her. Food is growing scarce; most fruits are dried or preserved –and that’s to say nothing of how ice cream and such frozen desserts of the like are a luxury rarely seen anymore. Sugar is rationed and restricted, as is salt. “Although I’d take konpeito, too.”

Konpeito would definitely be easier to obtain than something outrageous like cream anmitsu, especially the specific type that Satoru-niichan had once been so fond of.

“Hmm… I think I’ll try to get my hands on some konpeito once we get back to the Tokyo base,” Satoru-niichan decides. Then, with a teasing grin directed towards her, “I might even share some with you if you ask me nicely!”

Shiki rolls her eyes, “I don’t like sweets.”

“You don’t like sweets? Still?” Her cousin shakes his head, “Ehh… you’re really missing out, cute little cousin of mine.”

“Pass.”

“See?! I think you could definitely use a bit of sweetness to lighten up that doom and gloom,” Satoru-niichan informs her, and stretches. “… Man, there’s nothing like an apocalypse to make you realize that so many good foods out there can disappear forever just like that. Once this is all over and everything is on the proper road to recovery, I think I’ll go on a world tour and try out allll the local delicacies I can find.”

“… You mean all the local sweets?” Shiki says dryly.

“Ha! Are you sassing me?” Satoru-niichan sits up straight and laughs, delighted. “See if I bring you along for my future gourmet adventures, then!”

Shiki dips her head and bites back a small smile.

… 

The sky is still dark and dreary. But somehow, by the time that Shiki returns to the encampment with her cousin, things still seem to be a bit brighter than they previously were before.

[coffincestuous]

december devlog!!!

the devlog can be found here!!

look at themmm!!! cutie pies!! this has instantly made its way to be one of my favorite pictures of them!! 🥺

the background here is so so pretty!! if it weren’t for the red leaves on the ground and the broken path, i would’ve thought they were in the real world!! idk, maybe they are… maybe it’s like minecraft? lol. i believe this is the tower we saw in the previous devlogs/progress reports, maybe the one with the unreachable stairs, but definitely the one with the handsome fellow:

no andrew to be seen in these pictures, but he’s around somehwere. doing… stuff?

next, nemlei describes the process of creating tcoaal!! copied and pasted:

For a few years before The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, I had been dabbling in making visual novels as a hobby by entering visual novel jams. These were month long jams with no specific goals other than to create a visual novel from start to finish. I entered maybe once a year for... uhhh?? four years? I don't remember, and you don't care. My point here is that it was enough so that I noticed a pattern...

If a jam allowed additional gameplay in the visual novel, the entries utilizing it were often among the most played ones. "Huh." thought little ol' me, and schemed a wicked scheme. The next jam that came around (and I had time to enter) was Nanoreno, and time had come to test my hypothesis.

I only had a month, so I knew from the start the story had to be a "bottle episode", as in the whole story must be contained within one location to save time, and limit how much art I needed to make.

So who were the characters, why were they there, and why wouldn't they switch locations? The easiest answer was the classic "they're locked in and must escape" which is a story everyone and their dog has written at some point. Whatever, it's just a game jam I thought, and carried on.

Then came the characters, at first Ashley was going to be a silent protagonist named Player (yeah, you read that right). I wanted to toy with the idea that players tend to do the most unhinged things when allowed. So there'd be the Player, and one support character whose sole purpose was to spout exposition, and react to the player doing player things. Oh, the humor that would ensue.

There is one small remnant of this idea still in the game. It's at the very beginning when the player wakes Andrew up. He explains something, and "Player" responds with an emoji bubble thing, and Andrew then says "Quit your complaining!" despite the fact that Ashley hadn't really complained out loud. Now, imagine if the entire game was like this........... It would've sucked so bad. I dropped the concept pretty much right away.

This original concept is also why the narrator addresses "you" (the Player), instead of being in pure third person or first person point of view. I did enjoy this game master type format though, so even after making Ashley an actual character, I kept it.

Since Ashley was now a character, she needed to have a story. Cue the whole childhood incident (again, generic, but whatever it's a game jam). This also elevated Andrew to a character status, rather than a mere exposition spouter. Great! Now I knew who they were, and had a story to tell other than "unhinged room escape". (Which is a game I'd still want to play, as long as it isn't made by me.)

This is the first ever sketch I made of the two. Almost final design straight out the bag lol.

This was me still figuring out the UI. I don't remember what was the idea behind having the names off to the side, but thankfully I decided against it.

I drafted rather lengthy character sheets for the duo, as the more I wrote, the more they revealed themselves to be curious little jerks, with a lot going on between them. The story formed almost on its own after that. I knew I couldn't go too in-depth though, as the game jam imposed a hard time limit. So I shelved most of it thinking "well maybe I'll tell this story later on my own time", and left a sequel bait at the end of the story, to give myself an opening to get back to it "one day" that I assumed would never come. And also to give myself time to see if there really even was an interesting story to tell, or if this was one of those "really cool idea!!!"s that emerge out of the blue, but rot away as soon as you sit down to write them. If you're a fellow storyteller, you know what I'm talking about.

Leaving an "in" to continue later is something I've done plenty before. I might very well get back to my other game jam novels one day, which is part of the reason I took them down. For now though, there is no room for such endeavors, as The Coffin of Andy and Leyley must be completed, and will remain the sole priority until then.

Back to my "visual novels with gameplay perform better than pure visual novels" -hypothesis! I entered the game jam with my corny-ass bottle episode organ harvesting edgelord romp, and lo' and behold!!

It did gain more attraction than my other (gameplay-less) visual novels! In fact, it gains enough momentum to leave the visual novel scene. The new influx of people turns my data useless, and the hypothesis goes out the window. So in the end, was it the gameplay that attracted people? Or was it purely the oh, so scandalously unhealthy relationship the duo has? You tell me.

Somehow the game got caught in a shitflinging contest between the self-appointed morality police, and the people sick and tired of being told what kind of fiction they're allowed to read.

Suddenly, life gave me two choices, much like a visual novel would.

Do I take the game down to appease the people telling me to kill myself?

Or do I create the story I already wanted to create and get paid for it?

Boy oh boy, what a dilemma. I contemplated it for all of two nano seconds!

I dug out all the stuff I had shelved, and soon had the draft of the full story all ready to go. I went over it a few times, deemed it to be a lot of fun, and begun production of the full game. Episode 2 released on Steam in October 2023, and The Coffin of Andy and Leyley wrecked havoc across social media! And I thought there was a shitstorm before? HAHAHHAHAHA!!!!

And here we are now.

I want to thank you, my dear audience, for all your support. And I also want to thank the people who tirelessly pissed and moaned about some crappy indie game for months and months and months, helping it gain popularity beyond my comprehension. I would've never, ever gotten this far if it wasn't for you! The kinder thanks goes to the audience though, obviously. Thank you for weathering the storm with me, I hope you'll like the terrible little story you've helped to subsist.

The development continues, unchanged. I can't wait to show you the next episode. It's just awful, I really like it! Hope you will too.

Have a wonderful end of the year,

- The Author of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley, Your Least Favorite Person.

[fadetouchedsilk]

im not sure how to parse this exactly (probably since the thought hasn't marianted fully yet) but i wonder if the tone of veilguard's writing is less about appealing to a younger audience and more of a response to falling media literacy rates

kind of thinking out loud here but like.

i'm recalling the girl on booktok who proudly annouced that she only reads the spoken dialogue in her books, not the narration & the people in her comments laughing and agreeing (no wonder they can 'read' so many books per year, they're only reading 25% of the words). or 'starting to think some of you don't like media or characters, just fanfiction tropes.' you can hand someone like that a complex narrative, but what are they going to do with it aside from completely & happily misunderstand things that are very obvious context clues & themes? we can joke about the fandom mischaracterizing our blorbos & trying to be cool about just scrolling past but idk, personally i feel like i've seen an uptick in completely off-base takes in the last few years (probably some fandom bias there but this isn't my first time playing dragon age or narrative driven games in general so i don't think i'm entirely wrong)

it doesn't help that this group also loves to be loud online & the bioware devs (to their ongoing detriment) seem to be unable to distance themselves from fandom. we saw larian's response to this type of outcry, i wonder if bioware is just trying to get ahead of the curve. they make some questionable decisions, but they aren't stupid & i don't think people like that are especially hard to market to from their standpoint.

i don't think that older titles like dao are perfect or anything but i sincerely doubt that large swaths of current audiences would 'get' it. like, there IS a lot of narrative hand-holding in this game & i'm not talking about things like the map markers or accessibility features. 'do the companion quests!' you get told multiple times, more or less outright, & i'm still seeing people confused about getting 'bad' endings despite ignoring this incredibly obvious series of hints. there's a fair amount of information to be found in the codexes, but are people going to read them? we don't know, so we're going to repeat the relevant item name several times over on the off chance you might end up remembering it. like yes this is some people's first foray into rpgs, but you would think that progressing the story would be intuitive (especially given the structure & the journal itself).

the 'the curtains were blue!!!' crowd is unfortunately a very large audience these days, ea is a corporation who wants to make money & they do need that if they intend to keep making games. it might not even be intentional, it truly could just be the result of following market trends.

don't take this as me making excuses for bioware or anything, but there's definitely some sort of reason we ended up the way we did. i see the scaffolding of something interesting here with a lot of potential to be better than what the final product was, a lot of hooks we could have spent more time chasing & that leads to me wondering just what the hell happened.

[thetrexartist]

OK that's it I'm making a post about this-

To all those who think the thirteenth doctor is not a good doctor i have some points I want to say to counter.

I'll get this out if the way first if any of yall try to put down Jodie- get the fuck off of my post and account. She did the best with what she got.

Moving on, the few episodes I see people talking about as proof of her being bad are the spydoc p2, kerblam, and Rosa parks episodes.

Now don't get me wrong I definitely see why people get upset at these episodes.

Let's start with the spydoc episode, the doctor left the master, who is a person of color with the Nazi's. HE WAS THE ONE TO SIDE WITH THEM IN THE FIRST POINT. some of yall are acting like this isn't the MASTER, out of anyone you should know he would have taken something like this into account.

He was literally playing with fire, even the doctor mentioned how he doesn't usually hang around that type of crowd. In her defense she was also in a actual time crunch as well. she does not under estimate the master and had to get things rolling.

Kerblam episode.

In this specific circumstance the system WAS NOT THE PROBLEM. Someone was actively ABUSEING THE SYSTEM. In that matter it honestly was not the problem, hell it was even the thing to send out and ask for help.

twelfth doctor was the doctor to point out how bad capitalism is: " that human progress is measured by the value placed on a life, especially an unimportant or unprivileged life". The system in question was reaching out for help because it valued the lives that were being killed in its warehouse.

Sure its a kick in the gut because the villain is a image of gen z. Especially with the job market for the younger generation. but truthfully i'm from this generation and? we are so fucking mean at sometimes.

I have seen my teachers quit their jobs because of us, we are human we are fallible. In that episode a younger person was abusing the system. It happens today as well.

Rosa Parks.

For a lot of people this is a sensitive episode/topic. So i wont go to far into detail as i'm not the absolute best person.

The doctor did not put down rosa parks, she was even in awe about Rosa. But the episode is literally about how someone was trying to change history. So they had to stage the exact circumstances that got Rosa parks arrested. its even shown to be emotional and honestly? i teared up at the scene because it hurts to watch someone be discriminated against. But it had to be done.

I thought about this while rewatching thin ice. The doctor punched that racist because the guy was unimportant in the long run. He was able to punch him- and rightfully so imo. But with Rosa the timeline was at stake, so the doctor couldn't do anything like that but was able to recognize how wrong everything that was going on was.

one things all of these have in common are the politics behind them for us. Is our real world system corrupt? Most definitely i will not say that it isn't as that is ignorant. We have a real problem with racism in our world that i hope will one day not be as big of a problem.

But isn't that what doctor who is about? Politics and showing sides to our society and making us ask questions. That's what makes doctor who one of the greatest shows personally.

Anyways, this is all rushed. But i just wanted to say my piece and please, if anyone sees this and wants to talk about it. even if you don't agree with me. reblog or reply, i want to see all sides. I'm getting really pissed at people who will not even attempt to see the other side, even if you share my views^

[josiewinters1999]

Normal (p2)

L Lawliet x Chubby!Reader

Part 1

Summary: L longs for a sense of normalcy in his current depression. The burdens of the case begin to weigh him down. His heart longs for something or someone far away... If only she were with him now...

Words: ~4k

Contains: Established relationships, angst, depressed L, mentions of low self esteem, mentions of marriage, hurt/comfort, takes place before yotsuba arc

A/N: Thank you everyone to read and enjoyed part 1!! I apologize for the wait on part 2, I thought I would have it done long before now but life gets in the way lol. I really enjoyed writing this and I hope I captured L's character well. I just feel sad sometimes bc the poor guy just wants friends and stuff like everyone else :/ so this is my way of giving him something special ToT hope you guys enjoy!!!

***

Watari could barely stand it anymore. Watching L stagnate like this was killing him, and not to mention, severely hindering the progress of the investigation. The past few days, he barely ate, only picked at his cakes and cookies. He requested cannolis once, and Watari immediately knew what was wrong… he missed her. 

The night he watched through the security cameras as L called her, his suspicion was only confirmed. His left hand never left his pocket, the pocket that always carried her photo. The longing in his voice was soft yet deep, and the bags under his eyes were just that much darker. 

The great detective’s mood seemed to sour even greater every time he watched Misa interact with Light. Every flirtatious comment, every touch, every hug, had L shrinking into his chair just a bit more. Watari was afraid he’d break his spine the way he curled so tightly into his knees. 

Even Light was beginning to make comments about L’s slight shift in behavior. He would try to include L on findings in the case, and even tried to offer to take him out for a tennis match. L would have none of it, it seemed nothing would lift his spirits… nothing except one thing. 

L would be furious if Watari did what he was tempted to do, beyond furious actually. It was an incredibly reckless and risky thing to do given the nature of this case. However, the case was suffering, Kira was no closer to being caught, and its lead investigator had a case of a broken heart. Watari was quickly running out of time and options. What else was he supposed to do? 

With a heavy sigh, Watari picks up the nearest phone and dials a New York cannoli shop. 

***

Flipping through the same stack of papers that have been on his desk for the past three days, L scans the words over and over again, as if the reports would change in real time. He could feel his mind wandering, see the words blurring, and hear the noise in the background fade and distort. HIs was losing his edge, and with it he felt, his sanity. 

“What do you think of this report, Ryuzaki?” Light politely asks, handing him a document from a stack he’s already read ten times over. Gently taking it in hand, L reads of an incident of Kira enacting his justice on a convicted mobster, guilty of killing business owners who refused to pay his protection fee. Just like how we met. 

L hums, trying once again to put on the facade that nothing was wrong with him, that his heart was still even in this case at all. “I’m not quite sure, Light,” he answers, “While this type of criminal most definitely meets Kira’s typical profile for a ‘deserved killing’… it almost seems too much like Kira. I think that…” he pauses for a moment, “oh nevermind. I believe that made much more sense inside my head.” He hunches over the drink on his desk before whispering under his breath, “I just keep saying ridiculous things…”

He sighs, taking another sip of his barely sweetened coffee. L didn’t even have the energy or will to turn his drinks into pure sugar water anymore. Everything sweet reminded him of her. After all, her lips tasted just like fresh, tangy, sweet, rasp-

“Ryuzaki?” Watari’s voice pulls him from his stupor only for a moment, that voice being his only comfort in these hard times. Not daring to look up from the swirling, murky, coffee in his cup, he only hums, “Yes, what is it Watari?” The sound of his cart rolling across the floor becomes louder and louder as it approaches L’s desk, yet Watari’s voice stays exactly where it is, “I have something rather special here for you today.” 

When the cart stops, a delicate, feminine, hand places a small plate in front of the detective. A perfectly fresh, puffy, and practically overstuffed cannoli sits right in L’s line of sight. The bright pink cream falls in puddles on the plate, beckoning him to have a taste. 

With certain caution, L takes a hesitant finger into the cream, bringing it to his lips. “Raspberry…” he mumbles around his index finger. Pulling his hand slowly from his mouth, he carefully turns his head to the side, finding a set of wide, soft, hips standing next to him. He follows the figure with his eyes, tracing every familiar curve with a disbelieving look. 

Finally reaching the face of the not-so-mystery woman, L’s jaw practically falls to the floor. The woman only chuckles, like a sweet song, and gives an equally sweet wave, “Hi, cream puff. It’s been a while hasn’t it?” 

L springs from his chair like a Jack in the box, nearly dragging Light to the floor by his wrist. His eyes widen, and he, for once in his life, is left completely speechless. “I-I…” he stutters, “What are you doing here?” The plump woman only twiddles her hands in front of her, a guilty blush beginning to consume her face. “Well…” 

Watari interrupts the exchange by clearing his throat and taking a few steps forward. All three heads in the room turn towards him, though only two of them understand what is even being said. “I summoned her here of my own accord,” Watari explains, “I felt the case needed some extra moral support, and after a thorough call, she seemed very eager to assist. Isn’t that right Miyuki?” 

Of course he would give her an alias that means “beautiful happiness.”

‘Miyuki’ nods eagerly at Watari’s confession, “Yes, he explained everything on the phone and well… I knew that I had to come.” She tilts her head and gives L a soft, sad, smile, “He said you weren’t doing so well, cream puff. If I had the chance to help, I couldn’t just let it slip me by.” 

Despite the flutter in his heart and the urge to suddenly reach out to touch her, L’s logical side fumes in anger. Shooting a glare to Watari and then back at Miyuki, he sets his jaw, “Do you have any idea just how dangerous it is for you to be here right now? Our lives are on the line in this case, and the last thing I want right now, is for yours to be at risk as well.” 

His scolding has her lowering her head in shame while Watari stands still as ever. “I’m sorry,” she mutters, “I just… Watari said it would help you relax to have me around and well,” she raises her head, “I wanna help you any way I can, no matter what it takes. My life included.” 

Looking into her eyes, L could tell she meant that with her entire being. She wasn’t there for any other reason than to make him happy. He had two choices now; shatter her heart and send her back to New York, or put her life at stake to keep her here. They both were incredibly risky paths to take, each could result in losing her for good. 

His silence only raised her anxiety and Miyuki’s eyes begin to water slightly, “I… I thought you’d be glad to see me. It’s been almost two years since you last saw me in person. Do you… not want me here?” 

Now he really was on the spot, he needed to think quickly before this escalated more. Could he really tell a lie to that sweet, puffy, soft face that cared so much for his well being? Would it even be worth it to do so? Swallowing a lump in his throat L finally musters the courage to answer her question. “No,” he begins, “I am very glad to see you. I trust that you being here now means Watari took all the proper precautions to bring you to Japan,” she nods in confirmation before he continues, “If that’s the case…” he smiles slightly, “I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to keep you around for a few days or so.” 

Miyuki’s face lights up in a smile and she lunges forward, wrapping her arms around L’s neck. “Oh thank you!” she exclaims, “I’ll make sure you never run out of raspberry cannolis again, cream puff.” Returning her embrace, L snakes his arms around her waist. A waist that, it seems, has grown. His girlfriend had put on a bit of weight since he last saw her, and if he was being completely honest with himself, he loved it. Holding her felt like biting into a fresh donut; warm, soft, and like home. 

L would have continued to hold her against himself for as long as time permitted, but unfortunately, she stepped away, a red embarrassed flush on her cheeks. Looking back at the dumbfounded and clueless Japanese boy handcuffed to her boyfriend, Miyuki wrings her hands, “I don’t suppose I could have a moment with you in private? If that’s too much to ask, I guess we could talk with… whoever that is, here.” 

“Ah,” L hums, looking back over his shoulder at his companion beside him, “That would be Light Yagami, completely harmless… for now. It would take too long to explain why he’s currently attached to me but…” he trails off, tracing his thumb on his lip as he looks at the massive monitor full of surveillance camera feeds. If he uncuffed himself from Light, he would still be watched 24/7 by Watari and the others, right? Surely it wouldn’t do any harm to the investigation to give himself a one hour break from his experiment. 

Looking back to Miyuki, L smirks, “I believe I could arrange a private moment for us. Light has someone else in this facility waiting to spend some alone time with him as well. He’s been behaving well enough I don’t think it would be too horrible to allow him that. I’ll meet you on the 18th floor… once I find the key for these handcuffs.”

***

A quiet, yet peaceful silence hung in the air as L squatted on the couch across the coffee table from Miyuki. It was strange the way their relationship played out, their phone calls were always filled to the brim with conversation, almost never allowing for a moment of quiet, yet these moments, the ones where each occupied the same room together, were always so silent. Both were so content to bask in each other’s presence. 

L watched her with nearly glossed over eyes, curled in on himself as he studied her every shift and movement on the couch, trying his hardest to commit every part of her to memory, especially since she’d changed so much. The tension in the air that had lingered in the tower for the past week seemed to finally evaporate just by having her here. Right now L felt… relaxed. 

“What are you laughing about?” Miyuki inquires, and L hadn’t even noticed the chuckles coming out of his mouth. She had a way of drawing out the childish joy in him that even he seemed to forget existed. Hugging his knees, he shakes his head, “It’s nothing, I’m simply enamored with you. You have brought a light with you I feared had diminished inside me.” 

Blushing like mad, Miyuki smiles brightly, shining like a thousand stars, “I’m glad. Watari said you’d been missing me lately. You’ve had a lot on your plate and he figured that having me around might give you some peace of mind and focus.” 

“I believe he was correct,” L agrees, “I’d say my sense of peace has risen by at least 60%, and my focus even more so. Though I must admit… my focus is most certainly not on the investigation at the moment. Rather, it’s on someone else entirely.” 

She waves a hand in dismissal, her smile still cheek to cheek. L can barely help the smile on his own face as he stares her down from his hunched position across from her. He could stare at her for hours, there was just something about her that drew his attention like nothing else. If asked 5 years ago, L would say he didn’t believe in love at first sight, but the moment he met (Y/N), that all changed in an instant. 

In an attempt to make some sort of small talk, L hums, “I’d ask how your family is, but your father made it evident on the phone he still hates me.” Miyuki sighs, her smile only diminishing slightly, “Well, you know how papa is, after all that stuff that happened with my uncle getting killed that summer we met, he’s been extra protective of me.” 

“I think it’s only natural for him to feel that way, given everything that’s happened,” L remarks. 

Miyuki shrugs, “I suppose, I just wish he would be more accepting of you.” She pauses for a moment before laughing softly, “You know, my grandma keeps telling me that I should dump you if you aren’t going to propose soon.” Raising her finger she does a poor impression of a scolding elderly woman, “‘It’s been five years and there’s no ring on your finger, you’d be better off finding someone who actually wants to make an honest woman of you.’”

L freezes in his seat, his shoulders tensing and his thumb stopping all motions against his lips. With eyes slightly widened, he nervously asks, “You… don’t plan on taking that advice, do you?”

Noticing the way he was gripping his knees, Miyuki suddenly stops laughing. “Of course not, cream puff,” she assures vehemently. Getting up from her seat, she walks across the space between the two couches to sit next to L. Turning towards him, she puts her hands on the cushions close to his leg. “I told you at the end of that summer that I would wait for you, always.”

The tension in his body loosens at her proximity, but he hangs his head slightly, thinking as he resumes rubbing his lip. He sighs, his shaggy hair hiding his dejected face, “But perhaps… you shouldn’t. I fear your grandmother makes an excellent point, dear. It’s foolish for you to continue ‘throwing your life away’ as your father would put it.” 

Miyuki shakes her head, “What are you talking about? Why would you even say that?” 

With a huff, L unfurls himself from his seat, placing his bare feet on the carpet below him. Resting his elbows on his knees, he studies the patterned floor, tracing each shape with his eyes as he talks, “It’s just that… we have been in a relationship for half a decade now, and in all that time, we’ve spent a total of exactly 164 days, 13 hours, and 37- no, 38 minutes, physically together. This job of mine… it hardly allows for a social life of any kind, let alone a relationship of this nature.” He lifts and turns his head slightly, looking at her from beneath his overgrown bangs, “I simply feel that… you deserve an ordinary life. A life that only an ordinary man can give you… a man that is nothing like me.” 

“There is nothing wrong with you,” Miyuki argues, “You’re just as ‘normal’ as any other man. You’re strong, and handsome, and-” 

“Darling,” he interrupts, “please don’t lie to me. You know just as well as I do that this life I live is far from typical. I never had a normal childhood, never had real friends, and I became a professional detective at a time when I should have still been in grade school.” A pale hand reaches out to hold Miyuki’s thigh, “I care about you… immensely. I want you to have everything you desire in this life, but unfortunately… it may not be something that I can give you, despite my very deep desire to do so.”

Enveloping L’s hand, Miyuki grabs hold of him, tears welling in her eyes, “I don’t care about any of that,” she assures. “At the end of that summer, before you left for your next case, I told you I would wait for you, always,” she scoots just a hair closer, “I meant that then and I still mean it now. I wouldn’t have come all this way behind my family’s back to be here if I didn’t. L… I love you. I don’t care if that means I only get bits and pieces you manage to spare from your hectic life. I’ll take whatever I can have if it means I get to be yours.”

The detective studies her face with a full heart, his tired eyes watching every twitch and shift of her features. She truly meant every word she just said. She is in love with him, and she would do anything to stay in his life… no matter what sacrifices that entailed. For a moment, he thinks of Light Yagami. He may have Misa’s adoration, but L… L has (Y/N)’s devotion. He had half a mind to kiss her right then. 

Miyuki swallows the lump in her throat as her boyfriend continues to stare her down, his eyes flicking between her own and their hands clasped between them. He seemed so far off yet close at the same time, and she knew this meant he was busy thinking about something. His eyes usually glaze over in a certain way when he is lost deep in his thoughts. 

When he continues to stay silent for more than she is comfortable, she squeezes his hand to ground him. “Uh, cream puff?” she nervously chuckles, “Are you okay? Did I… did I say something wrong?”

L blinks, refocusing his attention on the woman at his side. “What? Oh I’m sorry, I just trailed off for a moment.” He releases her hand, repositioning himself on the couch in his typical pose, this time turned to face her completely. As he rubs his thumb against his mouth once more, he begins mumbling to himself, “There’s no way she would refuse… it’s the only way…” 

With increasing concern in her voice, Miyuki bites her lip, “L? Is… everything okay?” 

He ignores her question and instead asks her one of his own, leaning forward ever so slightly to closely observe her reaction. “You love me, correct? So much that you hang by the phone everyday just to hear my voice? That you would wait for months on end just to spend a long weekend with me?” 

Almost offended by the question, Miyuki blinks rapidly, “Of course I love you. I’d do anything for you.” 

“Even upset your own family?” he further questions, “They never have liked me, and I’m sure they’ve tried many times to convince you to end things with me. Perhaps they’ve even set you up with other men your age to get you to forget about me.” 

“Well… yes, they have,” she sheepishly admits, “but I always turned those guys away. I don’t need them, I have the best guy in the world.” 

L smirks at that last comment, “And I always appreciate your flattery, dear.” He tilts his head before continuing his questioning, “If there were a way that we could stay together full time, travel together, and see one another every day, you would want to do that, correct?” 

“Absolutely,” she answers with no hesitation. “But you just said we can’t… because of your work.” 

“Yes I did say that,” he nods, “However, I believe I’ve come up with a solution that would not only benefit you and I, but would perhaps appease your family as well. Or at the very least, give your grandmother one less thing to complain about…” he trails off again for a moment, biting his thumb before raising an eyebrow, “You would say yes if I asked you, right?” 

“Asked me what?” Miyuki questions, thinking there’s no way he could possibly be talking about what she thinks he is. 

“I suppose there’s only one way to find out…” he mutters to himself. Getting up off the couch, L takes the plump hand of his girlfriend before kneeling beside her on the carpet. Looking up at her blushing face, his equally nervous, red, features quiver as he utters the question that has been weighing on his heart for many years, “Would you marry me?”

Her eyes shoot open, nearly wide enough to pop out of her head, “Cream puff… do you really mean it?” 

Swallowing, he grips her hand a hair tighter, “Why would I have any reason to lie to you? I have been deeply in love with you since I was a teenager, and despite the constant distance and secrecy between us, you’ve stayed loyal and faithful to me. If I were to take you as my wife, you would never have to be without me again. You could travel with me for work, I could finally shower you in all the gifts and affection you deserve, and I could sleep easier at night knowing I wouldn’t have to wait even a day to see you once more. I could even tell you my real name after all this time.” 

Miyuki is speechless, her eyes pooling with tears, blurring her vision of the man on the floor in front of her. Shoulders sinking, he loosens his hold on her hand, “But… perhaps that is too much to ask of you. It would be selfish of me to wish to take you away from your family, to want to tie you to me forever,” he goes to stand up, “Forgive me, I should have never-” 

“No,” Miyuki shouts, grabbing his hand and yanking him back down, “I would, I’d do it. I’d do whatever I had to to be with you.” 

“Are you sure?” he asks, a self deprecating sadness glinting in his eyes. “If you want to, we can continue on the way we are. I just… thought that might be a possibility you’d like to consider… I can’t deny it’s a fantasy I’ve indulged in during some of my more restless nights. Thinking of you… it gives me a clarity I can’t find anywhere else.” 

Fantasy. That’s the word he used. He truly felt it was a fantasy to even think that she would want to be with him forever. Yet, after that confession, how could she possibly even think to say no? Under his seemingly aloof and calculating exterior, L was still a man, a man with a heart that yearned to be with the woman he loved. 

“I’m sure, L,” Miyuki mumbles through the tears streaming down her soft cheeks, “I love you so much. I…” she starts crying even more, unable to hold in the emotions filling her heart, “I wanna be your wife… more than anything.”

“So… you will marry me?” he asks once more, just to clarify. 

She simply nods with a resounding, “Yes.” A smile spreads across his lips as relief washes through him. L had solved some of the most dangerous, high profile criminal cases on this planet, but proposing to his girlfriend just now had been the single most terrifying experience of his life. 

It almost comforted him to feel so normal at that moment. He was just a man, in love, promising to spend his life with the one person who meant more to him than anything, as so many ordinary people do every day. He could quickly feel his heart filling up, nearly fit to burst. 

Taking him by the collar of his shirt, Miyuki pulls L to her lips, kissing him with all the ferocity and love she could muster. The first time she would ever kiss her fiance. 

Pulling away, she leans her forehead on his, “I love you, L.” With a smile on his kiss swollen, perfectly pink, lips he reaches up to hold her hair, gently rubbing the back of her head, “And I love you… until death do we part.”

[tmagpposting]

Alice’s Attitude

and why I don’t think it’s going to save her.

I haven’t seen a lot of people talking about the implication of Alice's attitude towards the incidents and horror elements so far, so I’m going to. Someone else may have already made a post about this, but I haven’t found anything yet, and I couldn’t find a way to get this out of my mind without writing it down. Naturally, I’m also going to inflict this long-winded and potentially needless analysis on all of you, since I spent 2 hours typing it out (sorry in advance). TW for blatant overuse of parentheticals and politics towards the end. This draws on content from TMAGP episodes 1-3 and TMA overall, particularly the series finale.

I feel like a lot of us going into TMAGP and having listened to TMA already were probably pleasantly surprised by Alice’s attitude of “The Horrors? Just say no!” since a lot of TMA revolved around the idea that curiosity and investigation of the fears usually doomed people to be consumed by one of them, as we saw with a lot of the Archive staff, particularly Jon. I certainly was. Though her ideas about how to deal with the incident reports are definitely somewhat callous, in the context of TMA, they feel very pragmatic, and I found myself thinking, “finally, a character who knows what genre she’s in and refuses to surrender to it.” I’ve been seeing a couple people agree with this, and say that her approach might even help her stay afloat when things start to escalate as the conflicts of TMAGP develop in the coming episodes. I thought that too, at least for a while. 

After thinking about it for several days, I don’t think this is the case. Given TMA’s themes and propensity for tragedy, and Jonny’s approach to tackling social issues, I don’t think Alice’s apathy is going to save her. In fact, I think it’s potentially going to be the character flaw that will doom her in the first place.

1. Alice already cares (not about the horrors, but about people)

To start with, I’d like to point out that Alice will only be able to maintain her apathy to a limited extent, and when people she cares about start being harmed, she is going to get involved. In fact, we can already see this happening. Ep 3 notably starts and ends with Alice making a plan to get Central IT involved in looking into their computers, when she tries to mention them to Colin in the first scene, and when she asks Sam to call them on her behalf in the final scene. I’d argue that the issue comes up because she’s concerned about Colin more than fixing the OIAR’s computers. She tells Sam it’s because Colin may not be able to handle FR3-D1 as well as he thinks he can since he’s been working on it forever with very little positive progress, but given the additional context of the starting scene, I think it’s reasonable to assume she also wants to meddle for Colin’s sake. In the first scene of ep 3, she seemingly talks more softly/slowly than usual (to me, it sounds like she’s trying to be soothing when compared to how she normally talks, even outside of the times she’s actually soothing FR3-D1), she doesn’t make too many digs at Colin as he sounds increasingly stressed, and she asks gently and subtly about calling Central IT for help when she is generally pretty direct when she seriously wants something (like all the times she repeatedly shuts down Sam’s questions because she wants him to stay out of danger). It sounds like she’s trying to slip it in as a half-joke, but Colin treats it as a genuine suggestion when he usually either brushes off her jokes or plays into them instead, so I think it was her actual intent to involve Central IT even at that point. Furthermore, Gwen tells Sam something along the lines of “Alice is the only one [Colin] tolerates” in a previous episode, they have good banter throughout so far, and Colin’s explosive reaction to Sam mentioning the app completely deflates when he learns it was Alice’s idea. All of this seemingly demonstrates a bond that goes pretty far beyond what I’d think of as a basic work relationship with no actual friendship involved. Colin is already pretty deep into investigating FR3-D1 to the point that it’s probably going to be detrimental for him based on him threatening/ranting at the computers in the first episode, and Alice is already trying to intervene on his behalf. Simply put, she is doing a pretty bad job of pretending not to care and staying out of it so far, and we’re only 3 episodes in.

With that in mind, I don’t even think Colin will be the primary reason she’ll get involved as the series goes on, and I actually think Sam is being set up to be the one to draw her into much of the conflict. She cares enough about Sam to find him a job when he’s having a rough time, based on their conversation in the bar, and she tells him not to care about the incidents precisely because she cares about him, and doesn’t want him to get sucked in and hurt by them. With Sam’s propensity for curiosity established and likely being set up to be one of his fatal flaws, Alice will probably get drawn into the conflict whether she likes it or not if/when Sam goes digging and actually stumbles on something dangerous later on. As a side note, I really do think Sam’s curiosity is being set up to be something big here, since he repeatedly wants to look into the Magnus Institute and says it’s a “blast from the past,” he wonders about how the code system works and how it could be improved, and he’s generally shown to ask a lot of questions about the OIAR, Gwen’s backstory, etc. He asks about things more often than I think he would if his questions were purely an expositional device for the audience and not actual characterization (I could make a post just about this, but I think other people have definitely already done that). Finally, our very first introduction to Alice as a character in TMAGP shows her trying and failing to be glib and uncaring about Teddy leaving, where she jokes with him casually before admitting, sincerely and somewhat hesitantly, “I’m gonna miss you.” If her failing to not care about something in the opening scene of the entire series isn’t going to turn out to be important, if not Jonny Sims style foreshadowing of some kind, I’ll eat my hat.

2. Apathy kind of sucks, actually (thematically and otherwise)

Alice being saved by her refusal to care, assuming she manages to maintain it, feels too much like an easy out for the kinds of stories TMA was trying to tell, and clashes with its sensibilities in my opinion. A lot of people fall into the trap of nihilistic apathy when thinking about the state of the world right now, and TMA even acknowledged this in the series with the Extinction beginning to emerge as a new entity/fear. Between worsening climate change, the gradual rise of bigotry and the increasing trend toward fascism in the western world (especially america, it sucks here), escalating international conflict, poverty and the worsening cost/standard of living, like the fact that a majority of people my age will probably never own a house and our college debt is going to eat us alive, etc., it feels like we’re all circling the drain and no one with the power to help is interested in doing anything other than making it worse to make themselves money. A lot of people think the only way to cope with that is to decide to not give a shit, which is a pretty natural response to being constantly confronted with worse and worse news every year that shows no sign of stopping. This has also naturally inspired a lot of doomerism and a rise in insincerity/irony poisoning and cynicism in popular culture that’s really hard to escape even if you avoid the news entirely.

However, the idea that not giving a shit about the problems in the world can somehow spare you from them is a) ludicrous, since they won’t go away if you decide to ignore them (a majority of the TMA statement givers didn’t previously know or care about the fears, and they got screwed over regardless), and b) definitely not supported by TMA’s cannon or themes. Surrendering to the idea of your own helplessness is precisely what TMA ends by specifically not doing. Jon sunk into a hopeless state of mind throughout S5, with the culmination of this process being his proposal to let the world end and allow the End to consume everything, including the rest of the fears. It wasn’t necessarily that Jon didn’t care or was apathetic, especially since one of his primary motivation was to avoid inflicting the fears on another universe, rather, he didn’t think anything could be done to stop the fears from destroying his world or whatever world they ended up in, which is the same deterministic mindset that Alice’s style of apathy stems from (“I can’t change or fix it, so I don’t care”). The other characters refusing this course of action and banishing the fears is what ultimately spares TMA’s universe from the sort of extinction it would’ve had if they’d accepted that it was hopeless and Jon had gone through with what he wanted. TMA ends with the central takeaway that you can’t give in to the idea you won’t be able to fix things because then you won’t try, and shows the characters subverting their helplessness and actually solving the problem of the fears by getting rid of it at the source (the ethics of sending the fears somewhere else are definitely debatable, but that’s a totally different post). The idea that Alice could be saved from the consequences of the problems in TMAGP’s world by choosing not to care flies in the face of the conclusion to the previous series. Alice’s refusal to care won’t save her from whatever TMAGP has in store, and judging by the events of TMA, fatalism and apathy might even seal her fate. 

Some of these points of evidence might be a little bit basic “water is wet” types of statements and I probably could’ve explained this in half the time, but I really do think that Alice’s apathy isn’t going to turn out to be very useful to her and I wanted to include everything I could think of that led me to believe that.

TLDR, Alice is just as screwed as the rest of the cast, if not more so, and her attitude is not going to get her out of it.

[itssmean]

𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 (𝒃𝒆𝒕𝒂) 𝒕𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓

track 10 ; ring ding dong (600+ words)

warning(s) : grammatical error might be occur, harsh jokes?

SYNOPSIS new upcoming app called ‘love alarm’ will be launched ! but it need to be tested before the official launching date, so what ifs the well known enemies— lee chanyoung and park y/n are the one that gonna be the app beta users? does the love between them gonna ring?

After a few days passed, a peaceful weekend finally arrived. At the cafe near the campus’s dorm, there were Y/N and Haewon who’s waiting patiently for the other students who are also ‘beta users’.

Somehow, without Y/N’s knowing, all of her friends (including Anton’s friends) are plotting something behind them. According to Sunoo, his idea to make things work is to deceive both of them to meet each other without them running away with the help of the others mentioned before.

Thankfully after a few bribing all of them agreed to help these desperate friends group (definitely not Taesan’s words!). 

“Well, are you sure that this is the right thing to do?” Yuna asked Sunoo, particularly unimpressed with Sunoo’s idea to spy on Y/N who’s eating with Haewon on the other side of the cafe.

“We need to see the progress, just asking Sohee to make sure Anton is coming with Shinyu and Taesan doesn’t help anything! Plus, who knows if Y/N will just dash out after seeing Anton?” he answered mindlessly while sipping his drinks. 

“Uhm, I hope Haewon will not say anything, I paid her 50 bucks! She just needs to shut up and just go with the flow.” he added. Suddenly, Yuna’s phone beeps— getting messages from Sohee that the three boys mentioned before will arrive at the cafe soon.

“So who will be here soon? Shinyu and Taesan you said? Anton is not coming, right?” Haewon just nodded, scared she’ll spoil the whole thing before the boys arrive.

“Why, do you want him to be here too?” Well, her impulsive thought is winning so Haewon just smirked while Y/N flusteredly shook her head “No, obviously not! Where does the thought come from!” 

“Do you know the first step of falling in love?” Haewon wiggles her eyebrows at Y/N which makes Y/N frown. “No, what is the first step then?”

“Denial.” 

“I hope you choke on your drinks.”

Shortly after that, Haewon waved her hand to signalling Shinyu where they sat as the boys arrived. Both Anton and Y/N didn’t know each other's whereabouts until they faced each other and frowned.

“You said that Anton is not coming” Y/N glared at Haewon who is not saying anything and just sipping her drinks looking around the cafe — well specifically looking for Sunoo and Yuna.

“You said that is just the three of us hanging out” Anton looks at Shinyu, bamboozled. “Who said that? I don’t think I said that.” 

Suddenly, Y/N’s phone rings, which makes Anton’s eye widened. As soon as she opened it, she furrowed her eyebrows along with Haewoon who’s sneakily looking at her phone too.

“Does your phone ring? Why does the heart on my app showing two people ring their love alarm?” Y/N asked Haewon and she just showed her phone, “Mine is one. And only three of the boys are here, so one of you must like me while the rest like Y/N. So who is it?” Haewon slyly asked.

Y/N who is still frowning cannot comprehend anything at that moment with Anton who is also in complete silence fighting with his inner self, trying not to be obvious. However, without anyone knowing Shinyu is typing something in his phone.

“What’s wrong with them? Why does Anton look so scared and why is his phone not ringing? Something is wrong here.” Yuna beams behind the bushes spying on them. 

“Now why are you hiding here Shin Yuna?” Sunoo beams while side eyeing Yuna. Yuna just glared at him and ignored him. Sunoo snickered at the sight. Shortly after that he receives a message from someone and he suddenly drops his phone.

“What do you mean there are other people that like Y/N?”

track 09 / track 10 / track 11

open for taglist!

@kyusqult @babigriin @brachioswrld @dinosluver @rksbae @ilovejungwonandhaechan @bunni