#she had gotten on without them
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No but because I'm in a mush mood, in my HC, Asparagus has been the only constant presence in Jellylorum's life since she was a week old. Their father was spotty in their early years until he stepped up, their mother died when they were relatively young, cats have moved up and moved on, but they have always been together. It's always come back down to her and him, regardless of how often they disagree and squabble and drift into their own goings on; it started that way and it will end that way, and I'm just a little sad about it.
#the concept of platonic love being a steady and reliable one is *peak* up my alley#and when he eventually passes away there is a moment for Jelly where it's just...quiet#because she realizes that everyone else has had a time where she had been without them#she had gotten on without them#but with asparagus? she's literally never *been* without her brother before - and what is one to do with that?#there was a time when she was very little that she remembers him reaching out to touch her paw so that she knew he was there with her#because she had trouble sleeping by herself and would get scared#and they would fall asleep like that every night#and eventually it stopped and they didn't do that anymore and hadn't in years#but when asparagus started getting sick and started forgetting like their father before him#she would touch his paw to let him know she was there and he would grab it - because even non-verbal he knew who it was#and she hoped he wouldn't be scared anymore#anyway sibling love gut punches me and you guys will all share in this with me#Asparagus#Jellylorum#my headcanons
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As per usual, it’s DP crossover with (probably) DC, although you could probably adjust it for other fandoms
ANYWAYS
A little kid and his mother are trick or treating in another city, perhaps at some kind of event rather than knocking on doors, and the kid is dressed as Phantom. It’s very adorable, with his little ghost-shaped bucket and clearly homemade and already stained costume—listen, white only works if you can just fly over street grime or phase it out of your clothes��and his slightly I’ll fitting wig. The kid is SO happy to be out and about dressed as his favorite, and maybe even showed it off to Phantom back in Amity Park before his family left.
The hero, insert whoever you wish here, is probably in civvies and just enjoying the event. The kid, meanwhile, is so glad when people ask who he is so he can explain, and so- the hero gets to hear ALL ABOUT the local town hero who is probably pretty small time despite the kid’s clearly exaggerated stories. The hero certainly never heard of him, but the kid’s mom confirms that Phantom really was the town hero, despite some mixed reviews of the poor guy.
“Did you manage to show him your costume?” the hero asks.
“Yeah! We went down to the cemetery to leave flowers and I got to show him my costume.”
Wait. Cemetery? Maybe it was part of theme, because Phantom had to be named that for a reason, but… it sounded like…
The kid ignores the suddenly VERY still hero and instead turns to his mom. “Momma, do you think we should bring him candy? He doesn’t get to trick or treat like we do, and I can work super hard to get him a bunch!”
The kid’s mom just smiles. “We could, but maybe we should bring him something homemade. I bet he’d like something more filling, teen boys like him have a hollow leg.”
The kid wrinkles his nose. “Like Vernie with the pizza bagels?”
“Like your cousin, yes. We can make some cinnamon rolls and take them to his memorial, maybe bring some of the apples from your grandpa’s garden…”
The hero is pretty much forgotten as the two-part family wanders off, not quite intentionally forgetting the hero is there so much as the hero somewhat accidentally ended the conversation when they just froze and didn’t ask anything further.
Not that the hero didn’t want to. But they’d learn something very serious.
One—there was a small town hero they’d never heard of. Two—that hero was apparently a teen. Third—most pressingly, the teen hero was both beloved enough to have kids dressing up as him and dead enough to have a grave.
This… might require some phone calls.
#dpxdc#danny phantom crossover#meanwhile Danny. sitting on a giant marble slab that has the most ridiculous gag gifts a ghost could ever ask for#he’s just like Oh Sweet Cinnamon Rolls!#he would try to convince people to bring him nasty burger but while val has MOSTLY gotten over her vindictive anger at Phantom DOES decide#that she’s gonna be petty and add cilantro to everything#because Danny has the cilantro soap gene#jokes on her he’ll still eat it#Danny likes his little memorial in the grave. it helps settle him sometimes. also he’s gotten to know the security guards for the cemetery#they’re fun. a bit morbid. they LIKE his jokes so you can stuff it JAZZ#MEANWHILE the hero. Whomstever they are but like 90% of you are thinking either batfam or Justice league#are having just. a TOUCH of a crisis#now they gotta figure out where the kid and his mom are from without either of them figuring out#dealer’s choice on what the GIW and why Amity Park isn’t on the radar#I’ll add my two cents bc when don’t I but I’m by and large not like… dictating this? anyways#I like making the GIW just a BIT more incompetent or just having some massive flaws as an organizational group#so they keep forgetting to tell people to not LEAVE and to keep quiet#average amity Parker if the GIW tried this anyways: aw that’s cute. anyways-#and if it’s dc I guess you need to figure out how the jl never found out. so#i mean there’s a LOT of heroes and cities in dc#and amity park is just lost to the noise or. bc Fenton bad luck#every time Danny tried to call. the jl had some insane disaster and or their systems were down#he eventually figured he might actually be cursed- jury’s still out on that -and he’s saving lives by just handling it himself#he can handle rhe metaphorical mega thunderstorms if it means he doesn’t accidentally summon a fucking tsunami to hit the planet ya know?#the kid and the mom have no idea that what they said was Odd#they are just so used to it. amity park already was using death puns and had an. interesting history and relation with death#even BEFORE there was a dead kid flying around in his white gogo boots
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on my knees and begging for brennan to give me something to latch onto with mazey bc she seems conceptually so sweet but I can't get behind a date that is like two sentences of actual chatting and then brennan being like "you SEE she is very sweet and calm" rather than the organic development of scenes, like I wish she was better incorporated into the plot man
#fhjy#d20#compelling romance arcs are hard!!#but brennan and lou have played so many I've enjoyed and have felt so organic#it's not even the fact that she was a deliberate love interest from the start#again ricky and esther are one of my fav couples and esther was absolutely designed as ricky's love interest#if we had ANY significant scenes where we just see on our own that mazey is great without being explicitly told it yk#like brennan having her check in on fabian even after his whole shitting episode lmao#even the date which lou deliberate makes fabian overplan is then described as chill and relaxing#and mazey could have clocked that fabian was freaking out!!#idk I love almost every npc we've gotten and fabian's arc this season I am just chomping at the bit for more substance from mazey#I feel like i'm going insane I want to root for them
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One thing I really wish the FF Community would Stop doing is Removing All Nuance from the Parents in Those Stories in order to Make Them Abusive Supervillains who Never Loved their Kid.
Like... In the Four Years I've been here, and for how Small the Community really is, you'd be surprised how many Times I've seen it-
#The Most Prominent (and Worst) Example I can Give is with Alec’s Mother#Like... Yeah- She listens to Fucking Books and is a Karen basically- She's not a Good Mother#But making her into an Abusive Mother who Never Loved Alec and just wants to Control Him?? I think we read the Wrong Book Guys-#That Removes alot of the Tragedy in Lonely Freddy- The Fact that Things could've Gotten Better if they just Talked#But they can't anymore since Alec is Trapped in a Dumpster...#There's also plenty of More Examples I can Give#Devon's Mother isn’t Abusive or Homophobic- She’s a Struggling Woman who was Abused herself (Devon’s Father threw things at her)#Which in turn from that Struggle- Has made her Neglectful of Him#I can't really say much for Pete's Mom since I forgot alot of Step Closer- but making her a Comical Abusive Mother probably isn’t accurate.#I even once saw Oswald's Dad get Villainized and Like... We definitely must've read the wrong story cause the worst thing I remember him#doing is getting upset at Oswald for going Into the Pit#It's usually always the Mothers who get Villainized tho- Like... If we're going to look at their Kids with Nuance and-#- believe they could get better if their stories didn't end with Tragedy#Why can't we do the same for their Parents??#Also if you REALLY want like... an Abusive Parent to Hate- Greg's Dad is right There.#Angel's Step Dad is Pretty Abusive too from what I heard (I never read the Story)#I'm just saying- There’s no need to villainize the Parents with Actual Nuance to Comical Degrees#fazbear frights#<- Tagging it because it's something I've really grown tired of...#Oh Yeah in Case I wasn't Clear#I don't think the Ones I mentioned above are good Parents necessarily (Besides maybe Oswald's Dad)#I just Don't like when people make every single one of them Super Mega Abusive cause that like... Kinda removes the fact that you can be a-#- Bad Parent WITHOUT being Abusive or Hating their Kids?? Like... You're kinda removing alot of Gray and making things very Black and White#Ok sorry for Writing an Essay in the Tags- I just had alot to Explain
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sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)
but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!
so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"
....
my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!
SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!
#mind you this was over 10 years ago now. it *could* have gotten better but id be extremely shocked if it has#autistic#autism#actually autistic#adhd#neurodivergent#audhd#school#school problems#yes i know theres rules or maybe even laws for this and its why they are like this but its bad and should change#if they offered smaller classes with less sensory overloading bullshit and other things i needed it would be great!#but they refuse to accommodate your actual needs and make up useless accommodations to legally say they help disabilities#ND people (not just audhd) and other disabled people that graduate with no useful accommodations are so strong and cool. proud of you!#ones who had to drop you youre also cool for not dealing with their bullshit snd allowing yourself to not suffer for a sheet of paper!#(though i know it can feel bad when everyone around you makes you feel bad for needed to drop out or failing out and not going back)#i completely stopped going to my psychology class because i started a week late due to scheduling issues and#suddenly we are told theres a paper due in 3 days and need to hse the textbook i didnt have yet as the source for it all#and it was in the syllabus i didnt get because i was a week late and didnt know we got one. the professor didnt notice me out of#the 100 other students in that large lecture hall. that room was also a sensory nightmare hellscape#too many students made things noisy and distracting. multiple fluorescent lights were flickering constantly and never fixed#the professor used a mic to speak to us and it had a constant horrible loud buzzing. it did that loud mic screech noise randomly#without warning. all the time. the quality of the sound was horrible so it was hard to understand her. on top of that she had a very thick#accent i wasnt familiar with so that on top of the horrible buzzing mkc quality that also cut her out constantly was auditory processing#disorder HELL. I dont know how ANYONE survived thst class but i seemed to be the only one struggling. everyone else turned in their papers#and i gave up and stopped going. was too late to drop the class to get my money back so i wasted probably a few thousand dollars#and THATS what i mean by give me reasonable and useful accommodation. test time would NOT make that class better at all#fix the mic and light issues at least or give me a smaller class with more attentive professor or something!#offer smaller classes for struggling disabled people! if the issue is not knowing who needs them then offer a switch to those struggling!#i got called onto a dean/counselor meeting because a professor noticed my horrible grades and stuff so its possible to catch us and help!#THESE SCHOOLS JUST NEED TO START BEING WILLING TO. dont make us do all the work to accommodate ourselves and expect to do well in school!
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ended up telling my mom “she’s a billionaire pop star … she’s also a songwriter I’ve loved for a long time. both of those things are true.”
#not a conversation I can have for a long time as it’s too uncomfortable#but it was good to push through and say it#it’s interesting. I will always have a deep emotional connection to Taylor and also always love her as a person and an artist#and she IS a billionaire pop star with all of the attendant choices that go with that#and as i’ve gotten older there’s just been way more distance#in terms of my need to defend her choices or agree with them or even understand them#I have grown less defensive of her (in a good way)#and I think am more able to just See What Is To Be Seen#without. again. feeling the need to take it all on as something I have to defend on behalf of someone I am Holding Up as an Example#I’m not holding her up? like.#idk if this makes sense#But I remember reaching this point where I was just like ‘gosh I hope she never writes a song that contradicts any of the songs’#‘upon which I have built this artistic vision’#‘of her and what she stands for’#and it was so funny because it was this TERRIFIED desire on my part to freeze time#and freeze Taylor#so that my reading would be true forever#just wanted to put her in a cottage on the top of a hill and keep her safe there forever#metaphorically but also literally!#and then I’ve just had to let that go#best believe she’s still bejeweled lol#that was for me TOO#and anyway her sheer prolificness made it clear I was never going to be able to keep this watchful eye on it all#it was just going to have to pour in and I was going to have to let it#and also on some level emotionally personally I was going to have to step back#and be less invested in a certain way#in a very real daily life kind of way#anyway after the eras tour was so funny because i had this strong sense that we were being SWEPT out of the stadium#with Taylor’s trademark Efficiency. and it was hilarious. Like yes yes the love and connection and talent is real#and Billionaire Pop Star has places to be and a crowd of peasants to manage!!! (I say this with love and a sense of humor) anyway
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what you’ve got to understand about working conditions in education (and also other care-oriented careers) is that if they’re shit, two things are true at once:
that does not ever excuse being cruel to a kid, no matter what
until those conditions are fixed, education will continue to suck absolute shit
this is because when working conditions for teachers are really bad, many of the good teachers who recognize when they are reaching a point where they can no longer be the sort of teacher the kids deserve due to burnout WILL quit. they will do the responsible thing and go away for their own sake and the sake of the kids. and you end up stuck w a combination of new teachers who are trying their best but won’t last long, burnt out teachers who are trying their best but have nothing left to give and therefore aren’t very effective at actually teaching, and cockroach shitheads who take out their misery on the kids.
we have all had terrible experiences with bad teachers, many of them flat out traumatic, but for fuck’s sake please try to look at the systemic underpinnings of the problem for one minute. spitefully declaring that teachers don’t deserve good working conditions or even the right to complain about bad working conditions because ms. whoever in 5th grade was a bitch is only going to create more of her. if you want good teachers then we need an education system they can survive in
#i get so irritated w the post where like.#95% of it is a good post and then at the end op is like WAAAHHH teachers are complaining about burnout on my post about a bad teacher#like yeah no shit. if the field of education wasnt so hostile to everyone who works in it maybe they could have found a better teacher to#replace that motherfucker with. and then she would not be there to bother the kids any more.#as someone who Has had traumatic experiences w bad teachers.#its scary enough walking into a field i know is pretty much built to chew new teachers up and spit us out#hoping to be able to survive it long enough to do some good and be the kind of teacher i needed as a kid#without people acting as though it is some sort of crime for teachers to want. like. basic human dignity at work and enough money to survive#even people who are nominally pro-workers rights#you guys have no fucking idea how bad the situation is in schools right now#the reason bad teachers didnt get fired perhaps USED to be tenure#but nowadays its the fact that its rare for a school to be fully staffed *at all* bc so many teachers quit or died#so they'll hire and keep absolutely fucking anyone simply because the alternative is No Teacher. and an empty classroom#full of kids who wont learn anything except that the system doesnt even care about them enough to put a teacher in the room.#i have gotten job offers ON SIGHT from principals who know nothing about me and im literally not even legally qualified to teach yet#like before even telling them my name lmao#and im sure everyone else in town who expresses any interest in teaching whatsoever gets the same.
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HUGE VENT
I'm sorry but i need to get this out, just please don't worry too much or take anything personally/gen
My routine these last two weeeks has been:
-Wake up at my 10 am alarm and spend the whole day in bed, mentally and physically exhausted, brain fog and no motivation for anything, only getting up to eat, having to wait for the "food time" hours to roll around that my therapist gave me because I'm not allowed to eat outside of those hours and if I'm hungry but missed the last food time then too bad, struggling to stay awake because again I'm not allowed to sleep out of the "sleep hours" she gave me and that includes naps, excitedly waiting for 21h30/22h to roll around so i can finally sleep
-Spend the evening mentally screaming in my mind because, while my body is still just as physically exhausted, my mind is suddenly sharp and full of ideas and motivation, but i'm still too tired to get up and draw
-Then spend midnight and onward rolling around in bed, hot and bored out of my mind because my physical tiredness also vanished, but i'm not allowed to get up and draw because it's "sleep hours" and i need to reschedule my body, and end up falling asleep at around 5 am
I'm totally not slowly loosing my mind 😃👍
Edit: Oh also the constant noise in my ears has gotten worse, i don't know what silence is anymore
Silence is actually worse than loud rooms
It's driving me insane
It's so loud
#literaly so mentally exhausted to the point that i forgot to ask a bunch of really important stuff and tests at my last gyneco appointement#i can't remember which med I'm supposed to take at a specific hour and which one is whenever. so i just take them both at the same time#i can't remember if i have still boxes of meds in advance and which one i need to go refill#because they're stuff i need to constantly take and not suddenly stop with#but i keep forgetting to check#and i can't remember where i put the prescriptions anyway#and which one are the right one and which one are old#I'm so tired#and I'm so tired of being tired#and I'm SO so so tired of constantly fighting to have my health and struggles acknowledge#i kinda just gave up and now i'm just mindlessly sitting there at the appointments for only 10 minutes being being told that i can leave#I've just been run in circles for way too long#and i get aggresively criticised every time i use advice and seek for help on the Internet. by the same doctors who don't give me ANY advic#or help#and my head has been pounding for two days#and my verbal ticks have gotten so bad that it genuinely gets hard to breathe sometimes#with a therapist that just made me talk in circles and lowkey criticised me for two hours#(this was our first real therapy meeting and they're supposed to only be 1 hour and are NOT reimbursed because the autism center will NOT#fucking answer to ANYONE. medical professional or not. so i had to go private 😃👍)#and the only thing she gave me at the end of those 2 hours was this schedule that I'm not allowed to bend#I've been trying to daydream about my AUs and develope them as usual to try to feel better#but now that i have time to draw. i just get more and more drawing ideas that keep pilling up and tear me apart from the inside because i#can't draw any of them thanks to this damn fatigue#i literally only did 1 af revenge and still need to do 3 more. and i genuinely don't know if I'll manage to do that#i told two friends that ill draw something for them. but nothing. because too tired and everything keeps slipping from my mind#i will daydream about Dimentio for hours straight. then forget that i did. and panic that the fixation is slipping because i “haven't#thought about him in a while“. ”a while“ was 40 seconds ago. I'm not exaggerating this keeps happening#i also keep spending the night DRENCHED in sweat because i just can't sleep without my blanket on me anymore. so more struggles#vent#negative
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I love your snakes so much, they're so cute!
Scoria: [bows] Sakura: [Rhaspberries] PBBBTTT~! Avid (the human): Thank you! My girls bring me so much joy. I hope sharing the cuter side of them will help people see snakes for what they really are, and maybe make the world more understanding and a better place for all snakes. ^_^
#snakes#pets#hognose#hognoses#I tried to take a photo of them together#But Sakura wanted to play#And Scoria just got done playing outside and really wanted to go to bed#So neither of them were having it lol#Scoria decided she had already posed for enough photos today#Y'all only see a fraction of the photos I take#But man on my rough days going through the photos I have of them#It's what gets me through and brings a smile back to my face#Sakura asked to come out today and let me pick her up without a fuss#She has gotten so so good#We're at the point she can be regularly handled for short amounts of time though she is a bit nervous#She's now at the point a lot of snakes start around that don't start with a fear#(Scoria had no fear once she had a week to vibe and get to know me as I only handled her with consent and when she chose to come out.)#(Scoria also realizes she scared ME when we first met and was like oh I am so sorry I did not realize I was so scary and was so sweet after#(We have grown so much since then. Ah it has been an amazing year with her and so glad we found her sister to add to our little family.)#scoria#scoria rose#sakura kurīmu#sakura#ask#asks
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god I really hate that taylor was such a bitch the first time we meet her and the last times we see her because I really loved her character and I feel like buck and her could've been a good relationship and good experience for buck before it eventually ended. like a cool happy fun times relationship that ends in a sort of best-friend-ism
#like. hate her for clout chasing#but she couldve been good for a while#even without her being so into her job she wasnt perfect for buck either#but they had jobs that intersected so she could understand#i feel like when eddie got shot and buck had to go to chris she fully understood how important it was that he change and clean up and clear#his head a lil#the treasure hunt episode the core 118 group had lunch and she was there and id bet my ass that shedve gotten along great with them had#she not had her first conflict be literally invading their privacy#like i like her so much but damn bitch u fucked it over#911 abc#bel watches 911#taylor kelly#evan buckley
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Just a quick post excursion thing
#al art#al ocs#axel still isnt used to feeling guilty#after multiple uninterrupted weeks of seeing fayes uncovered face riddled in scars ze cant help but feel responsible#if ze had just told faye to get out when she first joined the gang this could've been avoided#as fucking if. fayes mind was set#and hes right. if axel wasnt a cooperative partner he still wouldve gone out and probably gotten fucked right up#they're eternally grateful that the two of them clicked so well immediately#its the bellarose family curse to think you cant die but faye knows they woulda been dead ages ago without axel#faye#axel
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MR. & MRS. WESKER 🤍
i was able to commission the lovely @rcehb-art on twitter for this piece of diana and wesker during their strange after-the-fact reception for their very private wedding. i am just so in love with this and how it turned out, and i can't thank rc enough !! she is so kind and amazing to work with and i can't recommend her enough if you're looking to commission artwork ♡
#commissions.#oc: diana#pair: ewskers#or should i say drs. albert & diana wesker 🖤#i literally haven't stopped staring at this since receiving the final product !! & just the whole process was so much fun & i loved seeing#it all come together 🥺 i'm just aaaaaa i adore this sm !!! also okay i think i have talked about this on here before but these two didn't#actually have like a ''wedding'' but they eloped then a bit after that alex & the birkins found out they had gotten married without telling#anyone (they knew they were engaged but yeah there were no wedding talks so to speak) so then they sort of pushed them to have some sort of#reception at least & celebrate things kinda...like they thought he would've made a big deal out of things but these two aren't all that#fussed with the idea of weddings or marriage in general (there's a lot of lore here i swear. especially on diana's part like some of you#know) so they were very private about it all !! but yes here you can see them gossiping & talking shit about umbrella employees 🤭#also this goes without saying but pls don't use or touch this at all as it's a commission & diana is my oc !! i didn't think i would need to#say that but precautions now after things that have happened on here & unfortunately made me less active...diana is very very special to me#so yeah :] and ofc never repost art that isn't yours !! that being said please go & support rc !!! she's amazing & all of her art is so so#gorgeous & she's just the absolute sweetest & a beloved mutual of mine 🤍🤍
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sometimes my bestfriend is like an angel in disguise istg
#i was justttttt thinking that aw it's so sad that navratri music is playling everywhere and i don't have friends to go with#like last year atleast i had tuition sorta friends but now ive isolated them too it sucks#but i was like well it's okay ill do it when i grow up celebrate every festival i didn't get to in my house because we just never do#and then she calls and she's like let's go this club jahan every year famous hota hai full celebration#and i was like ehh i don't want to i don't even know how to play and ill have to convince dad for raat can't we just#go to a cafe or something dopahar mein uske liye i don't even need permission#and she even agreed but she sounded sad and disappointed about it so i was like well fuck it you want to go club na#and she was like yeahhh so i was like aagh okay and i asked and we're going tomorrow!!!!!#and it's so ridiculous like i just say i don't want to go but it's actually so exciting to go someplace other than a cafe!!!!#and i was complaining to her ki okay ill go but i won't dress up and five mins later me and mumma are making full outfit with dupatta#style decided jewellery she has saved for years that are specifically navratri types and she's like we'll get my blouse altered it's fine#you know being sick has really given me perspective on my parents#im not going to hate my mom anymore i never used to growing up i always thought she was brave but helpless#but a stupid day in 12th i realised when we were talking that technically she COULF get divorced she just#doesn't want to because she'll be alone and she thinks we're growing up and leaving anyway so why should she let go of financial#stability for us. which is wild to me because girl you can't buy anything you want without his permission so i don't understand what's the#point if he's rich or poor but whatever whatever she's been raised this way etc etc#but anyway being sick really made me realise who the real monster is😭 all dad did was shout horribly at me all the time#and was like don't you dare take meds they're fake this is all just junk food stop eating it and you'll be fine. when i was literally#having 103 FEVER.#and mom was the one who was making me different drinks juices cutting up fruits staying with me as i get my blood drawn#checking my fever sote jaagte#like wow i literally wouldn't have gotten better if it wasn't for her and i couldn't believe how attentive and nice she was being#like yes i understand she just thinks this is her duty she's just playing her role a mother a housewife but still#idk i just realized that okay atleast she's good at being a mother dad isn't even that why am i feeling good about him when his love#not even love his politeness is so fucking conditional#and mom healed me even tho i told her about clubbing and drinking lots of alcohol she's kinda against it because she's seen#horrible things in life family yucky men but still she understands ans trusts my sister mostly and know we just do it for fun and she#wasn't even mad!!!!!!! like wow ooay#moms love is actually not conditional for the first time in my life i felt like if i fall maybe she could be there to catch me and dad wld
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I saw someone say that if Elena or Caroline were in the prison world instead of Bonnie they wouldn't have stayed there as long, do you think that's true?
taking into account that they fully thought bonnie and damon were dead and didn't know about the prison world for the first four months (?) i assume you mean the other like. four? five? months she was there (she was there for almost a year wasn't she??)
yeah that's true idk what you want me to say. for one bonnie is good for trying to resurrect bitches she would've been trying to resurrect either one of them and coming up empty BUT let's say for the sake of it that they found out after four months as they did in canon and damon comes back but caroline/elena doesn't
if it were elena and damon stuck in the prison world damon wouldn't have accepted elena was 'dead' so easily even if she was stuck with kai he would have been doing his usual shit and threatening any and everyone into finding a way back far quicker than he did for bonnie (that's nothing against bonnie or their relationship at all. that's just his canon behavior towards elena and stefan to a degree that he does not display towards bonnie in canon until later on)
if it were caroline and damon i'm ngl i don't see him working hard to get her free or anything but if he came back and told everyone else about it then they would be trying to save her immediately
#controversial maybe#to the bamon crowd anyway#but if it had been stefan and bonnie#and bonnie sent stefan back#he wouldn't have accepted that bonnie was 'probably dead' because of kai#and this isn't even anything against damon#i don't think stefan would have accepted anyone was just dead w/o trying to go back for them#but especially in order of importance. damon elena or bonnie#ANYWAY. yeah. they would've gotten elena or caroline out a lot quicker#also without bonnie there everyone would have just been stuck in the prison world anyway but like.#for the sake of the hypothetical or whatever#elena gilbert#caroline forbes#bonnie bennett#stefan salvatore#damon salvatore#btw what i mean is that. stefan wouldn't have needed bonnie to send him hints she was alive#he'd just go looking for her anyway
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I had family from out of state visiting who I was really excited to see and it was awesome to see them but it was also frustrating bc it illustrates to me just how inherently isolating being autistic could be. Even with family who know I’m autistic and are accepting I can only be in big groups for so long before I become disregulated and can’t fully keep up with conversations that aren’t directly about my interests, and after another hour or two I can’t even do that, and my sensory issues start to cause physical pain. And it just sucks bc I don’t get to see them very often and I wanted to be able to spend more time with them. (And I’m at a better place with coping and regulating than I have been in years to the point that my family was impressed with how much I could be there!) idk something something when your disability is disabling
#like it was my cousins engagement party and she had a bunch of her friends from out of state.. and they’re all cool artists#and I wish I could have talked to them more but I just can’t be in a large group without getting super out of it really fast..#so I constantly have to balance to make sure I can spend as much time with ppl as possible without becoming so overwhelmed I become#unable to function. and it’s like this all the time and bc I’ve gotten good at regulating ppl minimize how much my autism affects me.. like#like I do so much to stay regulated enough that I can at least mask my tone.. and when I can’t people think I’m mad at them#idk it’s just. there is no version of me separate from autism and sometimes I’m proud of being autistic but sometimes the ways it makes#everything I do harder wears down at me.. and bc I put so much effort into masking ppl say things pro minimize how much it affects me#rain rambles
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roommate asked me tonight if i could get her and her girlfriend "backstage tickets" to the concert on thursday to see one of the performers. Girl no?
#sasha speaks#there are no 'backstage tickets' this is a public concert?#if she had asked like two days ago i could have gotten them into the dress rehearsal tomorrow actually#(it's too late to arrange that now though)#but nah no one gets backstage at this thing without a security check and a credentials badge it's pretty locked down#plus it's massive here and there's no practical reason i would interact with the guy in question anyway#at best i might pass by him in the craft tent but it's not like we're interacting at all
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