#school coffee seminar

[billthedrake]

ACCOUNTABILITY (PART ONE)

Story idea generously provided by @talesfromunderthemattress.

Jim McCready didn't like starting his work day at 6:00, but he'd been dedicated to his CrossFit routine, and the flex schedule allowed him to carve out a couple of hours in the middle of the day. Besides, he realized he could bang out most of his work emails pretty quickly first thing in the day, as he had his coffee, without the distractions of the office or some "crucial" issue coming up.

He was in the middle of one of those emails when a light knock came from the direction of his office door.

His eldest son, Ryan, stood there, tall and bed-headed, wearing just a pair of gym shorts and one of his dad's beat-up hand-me-down Auburn fraternity T-shirts that had become his favorite. Ryan was a football jock, a senior in high school now, and Jim was impressed at how much his kid was filling out that old T.

"Hey Dad," Ry said, his voice still thick with his morning grogginess. Even Ryan's voice had gotten deeper over the last few months, a reminder to Jim that his boy would be off to college very soon.

Jim pushed his chair back. He was already in his business casual for the office, khakis, loafers, button-down, quarter-zip sweater, and the cross necklace barely visible beneath the unbuttoned top of his shirt.

"Hey buddy, what's up?" he asked. When he was younger he used to chastise any of his four kids when they interrupted him at work. But a church seminar on spiritually guided parenting made him shift his focus, to put family first.

Ryan got a shy grin. "I just wanted to be honest with you... and I guess you're gonna realize pretty soon, if you haven't already..."

Two and two clicked for the middle-aged father. "Oh," he said. "I take it you're talking about the app?"

The nervous smile got a lot more nervous. "Yes, sir," his son answered. "I had a weak moment this morning.... you know..." The football tight end shuffled on his feet a little.

His father wasn't exactly happy. He'd convinced Ryan to install the accountability app on his phone. Covenant Watch. It pinged Jim anytime Ryan looked at a porn site or material flagged as sexual. Jim had even set up the same, installing Covenant Watch on his phone. Becoming accountability buddies with his son in the goal of a purer lifestyle. James McCready believed in practicing what he preached.

He'd only received two pings from the app before. Once was a mis-coded site, not porn. The other was a slip up. He and Ryan had a heart-to-heart talk about it, about temptation. And then they prayed. That was four months ago.

Something felt different now, but Jim couldn't put his finger on it. "Anything you need to talk about, buddy?"

Ryan laughed. "No, sir, I'm good. I mean... I'll do better. I promise."

Jim nodded. He believed his son. Ryan was a good kid. Good student, great athlete, devout Christian, head of his FCA chapter at school. And yet, this was Ryan's second accountability slip up.

"All right," the dad replied. "And Ry... thanks for being honest with me, buddy."

Ryan nodded. Maybe more chastised than his easygoing teen demeanor let on. "That's what accountability buddies are for, right, Dad?" He gave his father a longer look, then said, "Well, I'll let you get back to work, sir."

***

It was three days later. Ryan had fifth period free as a study period, with an arrangement to help out Coach Mitchell. Today he was actually studying for his AP biology test while Coach did some paperwork.

The phone buzzed in his pocket. He almost expected it was his best friend Braden Whitmore, but the dude had already gotten detention once for using his phone during Mrs. Clemens class, and even a dumb jock like Whitmore knew not to be that stupid to tempt a second infraction.

It was a banner notification from Covenant Watch. James McCready, 8 flagged sites, 14 flagged pages.

Ryan's heart beat excitedly. As he pulled up the accountability report, his suspicions were confirmed. Dad was looking up the videos Ryan had jacked off to Monday morning. Figures he would, the football jock reasoned. That's what accountability was about. If he didn't want his Dad to know he was watching porn, Ryan knew he shouldn't watch the stuff to begin with.

But Ryan had only watched a couple of videos in his moment of hormonal weakness. It had been a really great stroke session. While the church didn't have a problem with masturbation, their teachings made pornography the forbidden fruit. Just watch those videos of young jocks fucking some hot college chick was enough to make Ryan's palm feel extra amazing.

His teen dick was boning up fast now, and he placed the Bio book on his lap to hide his hardon from Coach, who was engrossed his work anyway. Taking one good look to make sure it was OK to pull it up, Ryan scrolled through the full Convenant Accountability Report.

His father had first watched the ones Ryan had, but then continued to watch more of the Hot Guys Fuck videos on PornHub. Like five of them.

"Hey Coach," Ryan spoke up. "Mind if I find the restroom?" Mitchell wasn't as strict in study period as some teachers, but safer to ask.

"Yep, McCready... you know where it is."

Ryan tried to play it cool, but it was like he couldn't get to that men's room stall fast enough. He shut the door and took his perch on the toilet seat and unzipped. Ryan pulled out his phone and ear buds. Helpfully, Covenant Watch had a link to the offending site, so it took just seconds to pull it up. He almost wasn't even thinking that Dad would be aware he watched it. Ryan just needed to see.

It was a hot one all right. The dude was jacked in that collegiate jock way. HUGE dick, too, thick and veiny.

At times like this the football player was glad his father had left his foreskin intact. Slowly, Ryan worked his shaft with his bare fist as he watched part of one video, then another. Then another. All with the same model/star. Dad clearly was into this stud, and the idea made Ryan's balls twitch with excitement. His hunk of a father had undoubtedly jerked off to the very thing Ryan was watching now.... tugging at that nice long Dad cock, working out a heavy, manly load... And then in the middle of the video a second buff dude entered the scene and started tonguing the dude's balls along with the chick.

Ryan was coming, blasting hard. Cum splattered on the tile floor in front of him, and the rest dribbled down his first.

"Fuck!" he hissed then caught himself, glad no one else was in the restroom during the middle of fifth period. Hurriedly, he cleaned up and flushed the tissue paper down the toilet. The video was still running and Ryan was about to shut it off, when it occurred to him that his Dad would know he watched it. He knew he could in a pinch pass it off as being an accountability buddy, just seeing what Dad had clicked on. His Dad probably wasn't dumb, but it's not like his old man hadn't done that to him.

But, fuck, a part of Ryan didn't want to get off easy. He clicked on the "Bisexual" tag and scrolled till he found a hot looking one. Then hit play. He didn't even need to let the whole thing run. He had to get back to Coach Mitchell's office pronto, anyway. But this would be enough. His Dad would know.

Ryan shut the video and stuffed his phone and earbuds back in his pocket. He washed up and made his way back. Now he was trying to play it cool in a different way, trying to calm his breathing and hoping that he hadn't totally fucked up.

***

Jim could barely look Ryan in the eye that evening. The father could not believe he'd been so incredibly weak that afternoon, but it had been a slow day at the office, and just, well... he was horny as fuck. He'd actually jerked off on Tuesday just looking at the names of the websites Ryan had watched. That's before the guilt had sunk in. He should be leading his son away from sin, in Christian stewardship.

Then that afternoon guilt gave way to horniness. He'd watched more. And not even thirty minutes later, Covenant Watch was sending its accountability report.

The thing that had caught him off guard now was that Ryan was doing his best to act cool. Jim knew his son was nervous as fuck, as nervous as he was, but every body language signal his son sent out over dinner or as he helped his Dad cleanup and do dishes was "it's cool, Dad."

The tension was still thick as they were alone in the kitchen. Ryan broke the spell, leaning in to whisper, "You mad at me, Dad?"

Jim shook his head. For all the emotions he was feeling he wasn't upset at Ryan. He had to wonder why he wasn't. "No..." he replied back in an equally soft whisper. "It's just we shouldn't have done it."

Ryan gave a grin, though it was more of a supportive one than a cocky one. Jim never felt as much as he did now that his eldest was all grown up, 18, fully sexual. "I know, Dad... it's just... knowing you were looking at those sites, too..." He didn't finish his thoughts be he didn't have to.

"Not my proudest moment," Jim said. "This stays between us?" He KNEW he shouldn't be asking his son to cover for his own shortcomings as a man and a father. Accountability had become conspiracy. But he also knew he didn't want Kelly knowing what he'd done. He'd rather lose face with Ryan than that.

"Course, Dad," Ryan said. "I guess that means I'm not grounded or anything..." OK, now that cocky smirk was there.

Jim had to laugh. "Nah, kiddo, you're not grounded."

The conversation had cleared the air a lot. Jim felt better, and as he got ready for bed that evening, he reflected that his own lack of conjugal connection with his wife had put him in the mindset where he'd stray. Not that he was blaming Kelly for any of his shortcomings. But the idea of the no-porn pledge was to channel his male desires into marriage.

But Kelly rebuffed his attempt to initiate sex that night. Any other night, it would have felt normal. Marriage was a partnership and both people had to want sex. That night, though, it was like Jim McCready was looking for a lifeline. Looking for his wife to save him from more debased desires.

Those desires came hard and heavy, as the father tried unsuccessfully to fall asleep. They continued even as he finally entered his deep REM sleep. And they were there when he woke up at 5 in the morning, rock hard as he'd ever been.

Jim lay awake thinking about the bisexual scene and how he wanted to watch more... how he got excited by the two guys kissing, or one dude sucking the other one. This wasn't the first time in his life that he'd had gay fantasies, but they seemed surprisingly strong now.

He looked over the clock. Earlier than he got up, but not too early, he decided. He slipped out of the bed and found some sweats to put on. He went to start the pot of coffee and then made his way to his home office and shut the door.

Last night everything had seemed clear in his head. He'd implied to Ryan that they'd stop this escalation. Only this morning, he was horny as fuck. Moreover, the more he replayed last night's conversation with Ry, the last he was convinced that his son saw it as a stop to things.

Already, Jim was pulling up Pornhub on his phone. With his heart beating, he clicked on the "Straight" selection on top and changed it to "Gay." The algorithm did the rest. The page filled with thumbnails of hot, muscled collegiate-jock looking guys. Handsome, clean-cut. Jim turned down the volume on the phone and pressed play for one...

***

Ryan woke up and when he looked at his phone there was a Convenant Watch notification. 27 forbidden sites accessed.

"Dad, you naughty fucker," he said aloud as he sat up in bed and looked at the full report. Already he was pulling down his briefs and taking his morning wood in hand.

***

Jim was a little disappointed that Ryan only watched one of the videos. Then he started getting freaked out. Maybe the gay video was a step too far. They'd shared some bi-ones, but this was different. As he got dressed for work after showering, his whole body shook. What if Ryan wasn't gonna keep this between them? If his son told anyone, Jim was royally and truly fucked.

But as he walked into the kitchen, everything was normal. His family was there eating breakfast. Ryan had gone through a phase of skipping breakfast or maybe just grabbing a breakfast bar, but now he was working out a lot and had football, and the kid now was eating nonstop.

"Morning, Dad," his daughter Olivia said as Jim came in and poured his second cup of coffee for the morning.

"Hey Princess," he winked, then Kelly greeted him, but mostly laid out the plan for shuttling the kids from practice that afternoon. Her bossy planning mode used to annoy the hell out of Jim, but now he appreciated how his wife kept it all running. They had four amazing children, who were growing up fast.

Some faster than others, Jim thought with a gulp as he looked over at Ryan, scarfing down eggs, sausage, and toast. At least the kid wasn't giving him the silent treatment or even seemed bothered.

It out the door time, now. Kelly took the two youngest, Sara and Mitchell, while Ryan would drive Olivia to the high school they both attended. Jim went to his office to retrieve his hard drive and papers to take in. He took one final check around to make sure he'd cleaned up the cum from earlier. It had been a big load, for sure.

He heard a knock.

"Hey Dad." It was Ryan's voice. Quiet, almost as his son stepped in and shut the door softly behind him. "Just wanna say, sir, you have good taste." Ryan had his normal polite kid demeanor, but that smirk coming back.

That caught Jim off guard. Ry's words but more than that his nonchalant approach. "Yeah, buddy?"

Ryan nodded, like he was getting turned on a little just talking to his father like this. "Oh yeah... I mean, I couldn't make it through one before losing it." His eyes locked with Jim's for a second. It turned the father on, and yet he also felt the earth was opening beneath him. Swallowing him to Hell. "Anyway... catch you later."

"Yeah," Jim croaked in reply. Mad that he couldn't be the responsible dad. Mad that he was letting his libido drive things. "Have a good day, son."

[ilykaveh]

⭒ 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 ! I WANNA BE A WH0RE !

[ ALHAITHAM AS YOUR TUTOR . ]

content · fem ! reader, name calling, bimbo reader, alcohol mention, sub ! reader, teasing, degradation, manipulation, alhaitham is a bit toxic, in public, possessiveness, taking and sharing photos without consent, threesome mention, toy use.

· alhaitham hates socializing, let's make that clear. while you may have bumped into him a few times in the corridor or at mandatory school events, the first time that you actually met him was when you were over at his dorm.

· you'd spent a night at a frat party where you had bumped into his roommate, kaveh. the two of you hit it off over a few drinks and a couple of rounds of beer pong — before you knew it, you were on the way back to his place and getting a little bit handsy in the back of the uber ride.

· while you both intended on getting laid that evening, the reality was that kaveh passed out the moment that his head hit the pillow. regardless, you lay in his bed beside him, too tired to care, and fell asleep for the night.

· the next morning, you woke up to cold and unfamiliar sheets. upon checking your phone, you discovered that it was way past two p.m., and you’d missed your morning lecture. after picking up your discarded clothes and any other belongings, you stumbled into the common area whereby you were greeted by your stoic, grey-haired classmate.

· his nose was buried in a book as he sprawled out on the couch, and despite your efforts to make a stealthy exit, you knocked over a rather gaudy lamp. alhaitham’s quick reflexes surprised you as, without moving his gaze from the page, he reached out and grabbed the object before it could hit the ground. you stood there in shock for a moment as he looked at you up and down before breaking the silence, bluntly informing you that kaveh had a seminar to attend.

· the two of you made some light conversation, though it was really just alhaitham making short responses and you trying to be as polite as you could. in all honesty, the man was intrigued by you. he was used to girls in his classes being all over him as a result of his academic prowess and his above average physique. you, however… there was something special about you.

· he ended up inviting you to get some coffee and to go over the notes from the lecture that you missed, and of course you agreed, with the exception that you could go home first to get changed and grab your laptop. although it very clearly wasn’t a date, you hated going out without looking your very best. to your surprise, alhaitham walked you back to your dorm and waited for you to get yourself ready.

· alhaitham clearly overestimated how quickly he would be done with this. reviewing the material covered this morning would typically take him an hour at most, whereas now the pair of you were on your third round of coffee and barely approaching halfway. hell, he was wondering how you ever managed to get into university.

· ever the sceptic, he even debated whether or not you were simply faking your stupidity to get closer to him, but by the way that you left for the bathroom for the sixth- no, seventh time just to redo your lip gloss, he doubted that. how drunk did kaveh have to be to bring you home? maybe you were just an easy fuck; it seemed that much was apparent to alhaitham. he cursed under his breath as he found himself contemplating how much fun his roommate had had the night before with you. he wasn’t a sleeze, but you were practically parading yourself around like a piece of meat in that short pink skirt.

· one coffee date soon turned into permanent tutoring. alhaitham told himself that he was doing it for your good rather than any selfish reasons — surely it's better that you study with him instead of some pervert that would gladly take sex as a payment for their time, right? or at least, that's how it was at first.

· it didn't take too long for alhaitham to become frustrated with your incompetence. he'd explain a given subject three or four times, and you would barely understand the basics even then. everything came to head with him snapping and running his hands through his hair as he called you a good for nothing slut, even going as far as to (rhetorically) ask if you would do a better job if he questioned you whilst having you bent over the table and his cock buried deep inside your whore cunt.

· at first, you were slightly taken aback; it was strange to see a man that typically kept his emotions under lock and key display such an outburst. then you thought about it a little more… maybe he was just giving you a study tip! that sounded more like the alhaitham you knew! he'd never degrade you over nothing, would he?!

· so you did what any sane person would do (or rather, what you thought any sane person would do) and said that you could try that, if he thought that it would help. alhaitham internally rolled his eyes, mentally cursing you for being so astronomically gullible. but after all of the strain that you've put him through, the countless hours of revising powerpoints and testing you with his personal collection of flash cards… he agreed.

· a pg-rated study session soon transformed into something out of a cheap porno. alhaitham prepped you a little, making you sit on the desk that you were using while he fingered you, all the while he recited facts for you to repeat back to him. by the time that you were ready, having reached a point dangerously close to coming undone, he leaned back in his seat and patted his lap, motioning for you to sit on his muscular thigh.

· you didn’t even bother to put your panties back on as you sauntered over to sit on his lap. your skirt rode up, leaving your wet cunt exposed. alhaitham undid the button on his jeans and pulled out his half-hard cock. your jaw almost dropped at the sight of it - it was certainly thicker than any other dick you’d taken, though the length is really what made you drool. your tutor teased your neediness a little before presenting you his idea: he was going to quiz you on some of the material, and if you answered right, you’d get his cock. simple enough… right?

· however, it would be stupid for alhaitham not to take full advantage of the dripping cunt in front of him, and the needy little doll that came attached. every time that you got a question wrong, or if he caught you daydreaming about his cock, he’d punish you. it was lighter at first, for example he reached under your shirt and groped at your breast. after five… no, six, questions, you made the mistake of hesitating and the man grabbed the base of his cock, then slapping the appendage against your pussy. he only smirked as you whined and bucked your hips against him, only for him to remind you that he still had a couple more questions to ask you.

· it was over an hour before you finally got to the end of his impromptu exam, and your demeanour was now akin to a desperate puppy. a pout had taken over your features, and your eyes were becoming increasingly glassy with tears threatening to spill if you didn’t get what you wanted - alhaitham was merely amused by what a delightful situation he’d found himself in, a pretty bimbo sat on his lap and begging him to be touched. you were putty in his very hands, so he saw it fit to allow you to ride him - after all, he was the one doing you a favour, right?

· these little study sessions soon improved your grades, and you were over the moon! upon receiving your results, you ran up to the taller man, who had to catch you before you both toppled over onto the grass courtyard besides the lecture hall. although alhaitham knew that he should be happy for you, the improvement instilled a fear in him: if you were smart enough to get these grades on you own, perhaps you wouldn’t need him anymore.

· that little thought sowed the seed in his mind that soon turned into a fully framed plan. sure, some would argue that it was a little bit manipulative, but it was for your own good, so he wasn’t causing any harm… right? and it certainly wasn’t done with a single ounce of malice, and you seemed to enjoy this little arrangement, so he continued to reason with himself that everything was perfectly fine.

· alhaitham’s scheme was simple: amongst all of the correct information that he taught you during your study sessions, he’d pepper in a few incorrect tidbits. it would prevent you from ever hitting full marks, and you could continue getting your pretty princess cunt stuffed full three or four times a week. he hated to admit it, but your adorable face as he pinned you down against his mattress and rutted into you whilst you recited what you’ve learnt to him. he always made sure that you thanked him for being such a wonderful tutor, and he even fucked you so good that you would agree with every single degrading phrase that slipped past his lips; it ranged from how you really were only good for getting fucked and that maybe you should drop out and become a full time whore to him reminding you that the only way you ever learnt anything was by spreading your legs.

· before you knew it, you were completely and utterly wrapped around alhaitham’s finger. you agreed to anything that he said if he promised that it would help you become smarter and would improve your grades! you even heard him out (and later went along with his plans) when he presented you with a cute pink dildo that you could slip into your panties before a test, and the idea was that you would recall answers easier because you were so used to learning with your cunt wrapped around his own cock.

· that being said, alhaitham was equally enamoured with you. he slowly allowed you to coax him out of his reclusive shell without even realising it himself. you would drag him along to social gatherings and parties - he told himself that he was doing it with your best interest at heart, after all anything could happen to such a dimwitted sweetheart like yourself, especially when you saw nothing wrong with wearing a miniskirt and a crop top out in the february cold. and no, it wasn’t like those fishnet tights or obnoxiously large white boots were doing anything to keep you warm at all.

· various classmates and other students on campus soon had you pegged as alhaitham’s girl, the precious, doe-eyed lamb that followed him around wherever he went and vice versa. other men were too scared to approach you as you had a scowling, grey-haired guard dog few paces behind you shooting them a death glare, and all the girls were insanely jealous about how you managed to bag the man that they’d been fawning over for so long. they even went as far as to gossip about how loose your cunt must be considering you’ve slept with half the guys on campus before him, and that you’d probably get bored and jump onto the next cock within a matter of weeks. alhaitham was quick to ensure that you never heard any of this, no matter how true the aforementioned statements were. a quick few threats here and a him flashing a picture that he’d secretly taken of your cunt struggling to take his cock shut them up rather fast.

· the only person that alhaitham allowed to hear you fuck though, was his roommate. in fact, he’d specifically speed up his pace in order to force louder noises out of your sweet throat in order to remind kaveh of what he had missed out on. he wasn’t totally mean though, no. because alhaitham promised that if you managed to pass this year’s finals, he’d let the blonde join in on your fun for an evening.

[intothedysphoria]

He practically lived in the laundromat.

Steve saw him frequently. Not in like a creepy way. In a sad and lonely way. Because that’s what Steve was. Sad and lonely.

He wore denim and leather and drove an electric blue Camaro and an ornate cross hung from his neck and he was very obviously gay.

The surname was something Steve couldn’t pronounce. Irish. Not anglicised. It had used to be Hargrove apparently. It wasn’t anymore.

The first name was so ordinary though. William. Billy.

Steve sometimes said hello to him, in between watching Rick and Morty on Netflix. Billy would say hello back. Fairly uninterested but polite.

The conversations were usually limited to complaining about professors or the industrial washing machines.

“Alright man?”

“Yeah I’m ok. That new history assignment is a bitch to complete.”

“Damn. See you in next weeks seminar.”

If Steve had half the balls he had in high school, he’d ask him out for a drink. Beer, coffee, hot chocolate. Anything really.

Instead, he gave an awkward thumbs up as that perfectly tanned back walked into the distance.

The next time they met, Billy’s bag split.

There was a significant hole, books struggling to escape as Billy stood, looking crestfallen. And Steve had an idea.

“I could fix it for you. If you want.”

The look on Billy’s face said that Steve could have personally hung each and every star.

The benefits of being a drag queen.

It wasn’t a hard fix at the end of the day but it really was a charming satchel. Pins of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Pokémon sat proudly at the top. He really was a fucking nerd.

Billy hugged him when Steve handed the bag back. It felt soft and warm and genuinely affectionate. None of those things were about to be complained about.

He turned up at Steve’s next drag show. A gay bar Billy never frequented. He was usually at the one which was full to the brim of guys who really liked leather. Not Steve’s one with its terrible 80s night and constant inter club bickering.

Billy told him he liked the show afterwards. The one where Steve had done a cheer routine to Teenagers by My Chemical Romance. He’d make sure to visit again with what Steve thought might have been a wink.

Maybe. He wasn’t 100 sure. Maybe he just had a severe squint.

Billy would now come to sit right next to Steve in seminars. Notebook filled with calligraphy and tiny doodles. Steve’s hopelessly dyslexic handwriting felt exceedingly ugly in comparison. Billy just told him it was unique.

That was one way of putting it. Billy was very kind. And probably went after guys like McKinney or Munson or Tommy. Not Steve.

It didn’t stop Steve from giggling like a schoolgirl whenever Billy gave him a compliment. Which hopefully Billy had chosen to ignore.

Robin set him up on a date after Steve came over with an entire pint of strawberry milkshake and cried on her sofa. Given the amount of time Steve had been on testosterone, he could not just blame it on his period. His period had ended for good like last year.

Jonathan was funny. He was a bit of a nerd, loved old horror films and in any other circumstance, Steve would be enamoured. This was not any other circumstance.

Not when Steve was thinking about Billy being on a date with any other guy. Someone who wasn’t him.

Steve ditched the date halfway through then spent the rest of the evening thinking about how he was a horrible person. Surprisingly, that didn’t help his situation.

Billy asked if he was ok. Of course Steve was ok. Why wouldn’t he be. Nothing wrong here.

Carol asked if he wanted a live laugh love mug and a pink sweater. Steve took the hint.

Telling Billy in theory was easy. Telling Billy in practice was fairly difficult.

He told Billy in the laundromat. Painfully unromantic. Just asked him out for drinks. But Billy was grinning like a six year old.

“Sure. It’s a date.”

Was Billy bouncing on his feet?

When Billy immediately started signing off their texts with hearts and kisses, Steve thought it was.

It is pretty much my two year fandom anniversary give or take a few days and this fic is for @shieldofiron @dragonflylady77 @thatgirlwithasquid @oopsiedaisiesbaby @robthegoodfellow @bigdumbbambieyes @thissortofsorcery and @harringroveobsessed for putting up with the incessant messaging and asks and random brainworms I get at like 5AM

[tuliptired]

hi! could you write anymore little looks at a humanities ta!reader x egon in college?

Do Wah Diddy Diddy

Pairing: Egon Spengler/Gn!Ta!Reader

Warnings: Reader is drunk for most of it

The egon/reader tag is so barren ;( Why nobody else dressed like a slut tonight?

INSANELY better formatting on Ao3!

 Egon left his lab, surprisingly, stressed. His major didn´t often stretch him too thin, he knew what he was doing and how to do it best, but it was just that time of year. Lots of work, and not a lot of time to do it. He always managed, with lots of coffee and little sleep, it was just a fact of academia.

The outside world reflected the inside ecosystem of his fellow students, buzzing with life and blazingly hot. Plagued by the heated air trying to cling to the classroom, you cracked a few windows open as you taught in place of the absent professor. This wasn't out of the ordinary- the man trusted you enough to run a class, and you ran it like a natural, admittedly. But today was a little strained, your daily seminar not getting to the level of intensity it usually did. Egon would’ve made a comment on it as he got the last word in, but he decided against it. While you were a TA, there was more emphasis on the “A” in times like these, evident in how you scoured through notes for other classes when you had a spare minute.

They worked independently, before you lifted your head out of a notebook, one of many fans blowing some of your hair off of your forehead. You glanced at the clock, before quickly setting up a projector and unboxing a handful of identical, thick books.

“Big assignment,” you started, a few complaints sounding from the students, “it wasn’t even me this time, blame Mr. Coulms.” 

He left the lecture room in a worse mood than he entered it, the thick tome under his arm. A play. He was a great reader- he could read each edition of Tobin's Spirit guide cover to cover in an hour if he was looking to cite something. Scientific journals were light entertainment to him. But plays? You actually had to dissect a play. To dissect it, you had to read it- well. 

He leaned against a bookcase, in the not-leaning-but-leaning way that he does, so as not to disturb the books. He would be searching for something like Ray was, crouched on the ground and investigating the bottom shelf, but he wasn’t in the mood, glaring at the text he was given before placing it on an empty shelf beside him. 

They were tucked away in the basement of the Public Library- it was one of the few places that they could ask for books about harnessing pure protonic energy and campfire stories of the 30’s without being looked at weird. Peter messed with the straps of his bag, ready to go and saying so for the 3rd time.

“In a minute, Peter.” Ray placed a few books next to him, searching for the right one that happened to be inconveniently smaller than the one’s surrounding it. He looked up at Egon sympathetically. 

“I’m sorry, Spengs. But I did this one in high school, and it was a lot of fun!” His optimism was cut short as the rest of the books along the wood fall towards the middle like dominos. 

“It won’t be hard, Egon. Do the voices.’ Peter procured a rubix cube from his bag. Egon seriously didn’t know why he carried it around, as it was never once solved.

Ray fumbled with the books as he tried to Dewey-Decimal their placements in his head. “I’ll help. Just, uh…” He looked around at the mess he made. “Can you look around for ‘Ghastly Apparitions of the Appalachian’? We’re gonna need it, too.” Egon only nodded, eager to clear his head a bit. He remembered the author well enough, weaving through aisles to find the proper section. 

He didn’t make it far, there was a reshelving cart in his way, his feet coming to a halt. As he looked up from the roller, you were standing there, hands on your hips. 

“Doesn’t look like you’re studying very hard.”

He sighed a puff of air out his nose, as you peered over his shoulder. You saw two men on the ground, grabbing handfuls of discarded books. “And your friends are messing up my hard work.”

He glanced back at the men, then back at you. “Is there anywhere you don’t work?” He didn’t intend to be in a confrontational mood this afternoon, but a bad class will do that to you.

You pointed to a pin on your chest, which read your name in small print under ‘BOOKKEEPER’.

 “Nope. How many people do you know have a gold plated name tag?”

“Waste collectors and prison guards.”

“Did you need a book? Because you’re in the library?”

He had his hands resting on the handle of the cart, not noticing until you dragged it to the side, taking away the partition between you. “Ghastly Apparitions of the Appalachian by Gregory Lederer.” He expected you to not know what he was talking about, and stand there dumbfounded. But you pushed past him, making your way to the “L” aisle of the General Knowledge section.

Your eyes scanned the spines of various options. “I don’t remember this play taking place in Appalachia,” you moved on to the next row. He followed you like a dog, unsure of what to do while you helped him.

“It’s personal. Scientific.” 

“The title’s a little oxymoronic, then, no?” You finally found it, examining the covers quizzically.

As he reached out for the book, you pulled your hand back. Egon wanted to be annoyed, but it wasn’t in him.

“Actually read the play. Do the voices.” Your own voice had the tone of someone trying to reason with a child. He reached his hand out, again, and you placed the book into his palm, conceding. 

Though you had a modest smile, Egon couldn’t help notice your tired look, under eyes darkening despite your efforts otherwise. He could understand, this was a hard time for everyone, no matter their field. Before he could show you his commiseration, against his better judgment, you let the book go limp in his grasp, passing by him with a small “see you, Mr. Spengler”.

Peter appeared in his line of sight amongst the maze of shelves, as Egon stood dumbly. A voice told him to “clean up my basement” as he passed by.

“It appears we’re not wanted here. Let’s go, Egon.”

When it was officially late, you sat in your dorm, finally having time to sit and work. You had to skip a proper lunch, mindlessly putting a baby carrot in your mouth every 10 minutes as you snuck a binder under your desk at the Public Library. By the time you were on your bed, feverishly taking notes, checking notes, and reading notes, you were barely halfway done with your studying itinerary. This week was sufficiently kicking your butt, to say the least.

The door opened and shut, revealing your roommate, Christine, setting her bag down on the chair nearby. You barely verbally acknowledged her, looking for a specific page in your textbook. She gave you a once over, before making her way to the fridge, but unable to stop taking you in. 

“Did you hear what I said?” Christine asked you, skeptical.

“Don’t think so-” Page 392.

She poured herself a glass of something, eyeing you as she did. “I said, you need to relax a bit.”

That was easy for her to say. As much as you appreciated her and her companionship, all Christine did was relax. Still, your flow was disturbed, and you reluctantly put your materials down.

She continued now that she had your attention. “You don’t hang out anymore. It’s Friday.” She crosses to stand in front of your spot on the bed, effectively tapping you in the conversation.

“There’s some guys in my advertising class throwing-” You can tell what’s coming next, and you shimmy past her as she exclaims in protest.  

“Come on,” she follows you around, nearly pleading with you. You sighed, stopping as she leaned up behind you. It wasn’t that you didn’t like fun, or being with friends- parties just stopped being your scene a few semesters ago. How’s that for maturity?

“I’m telling you like I’ve told you a million times before. That’s just not my domain.” Christine spun you around, intent on not giving up until you caved.

“You guys always get drunk, then you get pissed, then I’m dragging you home and helping you puke it all up.” She rolled her eyes.

“We’ll only have a little- and,” she pointed an accusatory finger to your chest, “to be fair, you wouldn’t have to do all that if you drank a little yourself.”

You pointed the same finger back at her. “So we can all puke together? What a fun night.”

Christine made the sign of the cross then, pointed her fingers to the sky virtuously. “I swear on my life; we’ll know when to stop.” When she opened her eyes, you still weren’t convinced.

“Pleeeease? If it’s lame, we’ll leave and rent a video and get a pizza. But you might have fun.” She looked at you with those big blue eyes, and it took all of your strength to resist. She pleaded with you again, until you finally broke, covering your ears.

You groaned dramatically. “Alright, fine, fine. I’ll go to your stupid frat party and get smashed on cheap beer.” Christine cheered, making her way over to the phone. 

“I’ll call Dean and Lisa and-” you flopped back onto your bed. Staring at your long forgotten work, you wondered if this was the right choice. 

Egon read the line, waiting patiently for Ray to respond from the copy he borrowed himself, as the man read for all other 11 characters of the play. It was about two rulers from warring countries forced to live together in a dungeon, but he just couldn’t grasp what was so special about that. It was late into the night, the dorm only illuminated by a few lamps and the little bit of light pouring in from under the door. After hours of trying to evade it, both men had only made a small dent in the long drama.

Ray pushed his reading glasses up. “You need more conviction, Egon, I don’t feel like your wife right now.” Egon closed his copy, putting his forehead in his hand against his desk.

“I don’t think this is working.”

“Are you doing improv? ‘Of course it’s not working, you-”

“No, Raymond. This book isn’t working.” Egon slid it away from him, the bright red cover hurting his eyes, and his pride.

Ray looked sad for his friend, taking off his glasses. “The only way to do it is to read. I’m sorry.” He tossed his book onto his bed. “But we can take a break. Whaddya wanna do?”

Egon remembered it was Friday, the day most young adults would use to unwind. He reached into the drawer beneath him, emerging with a miniature Tesla coil Ray had fashioned.

“You read my mind, Spenges!”

The two men were engrossed with messing around with it, placing numerous objects on and around the transformer- granted that any other flammable or conducive thing they owned was moved out of the way. As Ray teased the sparks with a pencil, he suddenly recalled something, eyes flashing and wide as he dropped the writing utensil.

“Peter has my car!” He grabbed each side of his head, almost comically as he could picture it- a nice, clean Camaro being trashed by beer and bodily fluids.

Ray was just short of spiraling, stuck on either racing down to the party himself or bawling in the spinny chair. “I’d go there myself- and strangle the life out of him,” he nearly wept, covering his eyes.

Egon let his eyes shut, before willinging himself to his feet. He’d never, ever associate with any sort of party, let alone one at a fraternity. But Ray loved that car, his dad’s graduation gift to him that’s been his pride and joy since freshman year. His friend barely even drove it around, afraid to raise the mileage too much. He didn’t doubt Ray’s conviction, or ability, to show it to Peter for going against his wishes, but the engineer was in hot water with the hosting students. One complicated party trick gone wrong, and the front lawn was ablaze quicker than he could control the little ball of plasma. It was their sophomore year, but he still wasn’t welcome near the block of brownstones he managed to devalue.

“Thank you, Egon, I promise I’ll repay you,” Ray’s eyes were glossy with tears as he pressed his face impossibly close to the glass of the window, trying to spot his baby driving somewhere down the street.

Time lessened the heat, Egon thought to himself. It was dark, but not a long walk off campus and a block or two away from the party. It wasn’t hard to find it, either- the music was loud and the bacchanal activities spilled out onto the street and into neighboring yards. No sign of the car. He wrinkled his nose. In the last stretch of freshman year, Peter tried convincing him and Ray to join a fraternity, rattling off a laundry list of reasons that it’d be a thrilling experience for the trio. He was obviously unsuccessful, and dropped the idea when he realized that it’d be hard to make friends in the already tight knit community. 

Egon didn’t dare touch the doorknob, evading people lounging on the stoop as he entered the large house after someone, using his foot to keep the door open. It smelt strongly of booze in the hot, dimly lit apartment, music still blaring from an unknown source. Not to mention the hazy smoke that was billowing through the air, hard to avoid with his height, much like the sounds of two people making out behind the couch. Infection central. How were all these people still going this late? He had to step over the passed out body of some guy without a shirt to get to the kitchen. 

As he stepped from the carpeted area to the tiled floor, arms quickly wrapped around his middle. His head snapped down, and there you were, head buried in his chest.

“Hi, Egon,” you smiled sweetly up at him, eyes glazed over and voice syrupy, not as precise as you made sure it was. He blinked a few times, noticing not only your shoes standing on his, but the fact you called him by his first name.

“Hi.” He reveled in the confusion, before pulling you away from him, gently. “Have you seen Peter? Peter Venkman?”

You thought about it, before the memory flashed back into your recollection. “Dr. Love? He left with my friend Christine.” Your voice slurred the words “left” and “with”, the same way Ray did when he was so smashed he couldn’t stand. Junior year was a sight to behold. 

He remembered how he handled drunken Ray, noting how warm your shoulders were under his fingers. “You’ve been drinking?” He asked despite himself. Being a gentleman was above personal vendetta. It was odd, seeing you dressed like this, out of the professional attire you took pride in every day. Your ability to pick clothes with an anal retentiveness rivals even him- the only college student in a pressed dress shirt, a sweater vest, and slacks. 

“Like, one or five. Itsfine, I’mfine,” you waved your hands around dismissively, before placing them over Egon’s. “I didn’t know you could party, Egie.” He ignored the heat that stung the muscles in his cheeks.

“I don’t.” He went along with it as you started swaying the two of you back and forth lightly. “Did you come with any other friends?”

You went silent, thinking again. It was evidently hard to think and sway, and you eventually fell back into him, unable to keep your balance. “DeanandLisa went to get…food. And they told me to stay here. So I took’a nap.” You nodded to yourself.

“When?”

You couldn’t answer. He peeked sideways at the clock- 3:19. Wherever your friends went, they weren’t going to be back for a long time. 

Your arms were still around him, head back on his chest as his hands hovered over you, awkwardly. It was barely audible, but you were mumbling along to the song playing throughout the rest of the house. He should’ve felt a smug pride, watching you who were once so confident drool on yourself, stumble over your words, and paw at him, but he couldn’t. Egon felt a lash of guilt at the idea of leaving you behind, telling Ray that Peter was long gone, and going to bed. You were obviously inebriated- with no friends and too juiced to know not to sleep on the floor, he couldn’t just let you stay in this dump. 

That’s how he ended up herding you out the door, but not before you stumbled about the apartment, saying good night to everyone. He was on your heels as you banged on a socked-bedroom door, bidding whoever was on the other side farewell, but he wasn’t quick enough before you were shouting your goodbyes down the stairwell of the basement. For being wasted, you were surprisingly fast. He finally got you outside, the skin under his fingers actually cooling as you left the cramped party.

“I didn’t take you to be a party-person,” he confessed, hand on the small of your back to stop you from running across the street to greet the cat staring you down.

“I’m- wait,” you did in fact run, having to kick off your shoes for efficiency before bending down rather ungracefully to pet the feline like a child would, fingers splayed and pushing its ears back unintentionally. He watched on as you skipped back to the sidewalk, grabbing a street sign for stability when you reached him.

“I’m not,” you resumed as he steered you on. “But- it was Christine! She showed me her’fake eyelash…es and convinced me!” You looked to him to share your disbelief as you told the story, shoes waving around as you moved your hands. “I’couldn’t say no!”

Egon found himself smiling. “I have a roommate very similar.” You were surprisingly easier to talk to when drunk. He wasn’t burning up, or scrambling for his words like he normally did when you teased him, making the scientist detest you more and more for your ability to confuse him. His thoughts ceased, as you got closer to campus, but walking with increasing difficulty.

It was when he had to catch you before tripping over yourself that he swallowed his inhibitions, wrapping a hand under you. He wasn’t the strongest out there, maybe even a little weak, but he could support your weight until you reached home. As you let out a small noise of surprise though, he felt a primitive sense of manliness, your figure pressed to his in a bridal carry.

“Soooo strong.” You praised him, voice trailing off as you let your head hit his shoulder. He had to remind himself that you were drunk, none of this really meant anything. You’d wake up, and decide to torment him after taking an aspirin. His grip weakened as his smile did.

“Don’t drop’me,” your hands clawed at the fabric of his shirt, and he adjusted his hold.

“I won’t,” he watched you close your eyes, face content. “I won’t.”

 You were halfway back to the dormitory. He could feel you stirring, looking down and finding your eyes fixed on the night sky. 

“What’s up there?”

“Ursa Major.” You pointed lazily.

“That’s a plane.”

You stiffened in his arms. “No, it’s’not. I know this. It’s the bear.” You managed to cross your arms over yourself while in his hold. He felt bad, provoking you while inebriated. 

“Then it’s the bear.”

“Put me down,” you hit him on the chest a few times, willing him to reluctantly place you on your own two feet. You shook off his attempts at still holding you, intent on trying to make it home on your own. You stormed off along the path, nearly veering off into the grass.

“Where are you going?” He couldn’t hide the concern behind his voice, trying to keep up with you as you took on a sudden irritation towards him.

“Home.” You kept your pace, before slowing, battling something in behind your eyes in your drunken state. “You think I’m dumb.” Egon stopped in his tracks in a moment, before walking behind you again.

“That’s not true,” he said simply, throwing away his feud with you when sober. He thought of you as one of the smartest people he knew. And you managed to make him look like a mere child while baring your smile at him.

“Maybe I’like being drunk,” you retorted to no one in front of you. As you slowed, so did Egon, watching on as you looked on down the dim, street lamp lit path. When he followed your gaze, he saw nothing but the darkness of night ahead of him. Suddenly, you fell forward, uncaring and weightless. He wasn’t quick enough to catch you, heart dropping to his toes before you simply rolled over onto your back. Your knees were scraped, rapidly drying blood mixing with the gravel and dust of the ground over your lacerated skin. Before he could worry too much about it, you merely laughed, full of glee as your eyes were transfixed on the stars, arms out like you were a star yourself. 

You passed out pretty quick after that, a little heavier in his arms. To say Egon was uneasy was an understatement, but at least you were out for a bit. He struggled to get the door to the building open, and even more so getting up to your dormitory floor, only narrowly avoiding hitting your head against a door frame every so often. Taking a quick look at the plates on each door, he was relieved at finding your surname printed on one. After a few discreet knocks, however, no one opened up, either passed out themselves or simply not home. Searching for solutions, he sighed, again, gently laying you against the baseboards. It wasn’t his most elegant idea, but it’d have to do as he reached in his pocket for a pad and paper. He simply scribbled the words “Passed out, sleeping in 244. Please pick up when you get home.” Pressing it in the space between the room number and the wood, he picked you up for the third time and made the trek back to his own place.

You looked peaceful, as Egon decided on putting you in Ray’s bed, alcohol and cotton pads ready. Ray wasn’t home himself- and it’d be unbecoming of him to put you in his own. He hummed to himself, your current state reminding him of the deuteragonist in the play you gave him. They were affluent and sybaritic, imprisoned while drunk and jovial, to the aggravation of the protagonist, tied to tradition and analytical. He hoped that whoever you were in chains with took the liberty of cleaning your open wounds like he did. 

Apparently, the sting of disinfectant is enough to rouse the unconscious awake, as the liquid being pressed to your skin made you jolt back to the present, sucking in air between your teeth and nearly kneeing him in the nose. You rushed to sit up as properly as you could, bringing your legs to your chest.

“What’re you doing?” The pain must’ve been worse in this state. He suddenly felt very, very bad about not waiting until you were awake to take care of it, but he remembered that you couldn’t make proper decisions for yourself like this. He wet another pad, though warily. Who was Egon to say that he could make proper decisions for you, sober or otherwise?

He approached you gently, showing you his materials. “Sanitizing. It could get infected.” Maybe that was a bit overzealous, but germs love untreated, open flesh.

You calmed, letting your legs dangle over the bedside again, the exaggerated idea of losing a leg scarier than the cleaning agent in his hand. “Oh.” He figured you were sobering up, even by a bit, from the way your words slurred less and you clung Ray’s blanket to yourself, night’s activities catching up with your tired body. You looked around as he worked quickly, taking in the room.

“You’re messy.” Egon raised his eyebrows once at that, prepping another pad.

“We’re scientists. And Peter.” He could hear you laugh weakly above him. It felt nice, to make you feel nice. Egon felt oddly at ease, on his knees, cleaning you up- as dubious as it sounded. He moved on to your other leg, remembering your situation. “Would you like to stay here? Your friends aren’t home.”

Silence as he wiped away the grime. Your voice sounded again. “A sleepover.”

He resisted a yawn, letting it escape through his nose before catching sight of the clock. “Sure.”

You didn’t say anything else. Better for him- he was sure you didn’t have a key and he was a terrible locksmith. You were leaning back on your hands.

“My doctor.”

He bit back the smile and blush that spread over his face with a clench of his jaw. You were still drunk, no matter how coherent. And wrong. “Not yet a doctor.” He was done bandaging both your injuries some time ago.

“Doctor Egon,” you drew out the word, giggling to yourself. He’d let it slide, this time. Misused titles were disdainful in academia. But he supposed being a stickler didn’t matter so much, now.

Eventually, he rose to his feet, eyes honing in to a surface level scratch on your cheek from the fall. He held your jaw lighty, thumb careful to not graze too much over it. It wasn’t severe, but he assumed you’d prefer to not have a deep scar there for the entirety of the summer to come. He thought about summer. He’d be here, on an internship, while you’d be away, probably away with your friends again. You’d get drunk, seemingly trusting the people around you far too much until you’re hurt- worse than you are now. Whatever meathead you’d spent the night with wouldn’t know first aid if it was thrown at him. Egon soaked in his jealousy, eyebrows falling over his eyes, before coming back to his senses, soaking one more piece of cotton and gently tapping it to your face, a small adhesive placed to protect it. 

“Kiss to make it better?” He let go of your face, moving to the kitchen sink to wash his hands as you giggled to yourself again. It was awfully late, now.

“You should get some sleep,” he dried his hands off. He would miss you, but time was the only fool-proof remedy- and daylight was quickly approaching.

“No fun,” you complained, but you still settled into Ray’s bed, pulling the comforter around yourself. He contemplated what to do, get into his own bed or just wait for you to sleep instead. You rolled over to face him.

“Are you sure you don’t want my help with the play? I’m not supposed to, though. But I can do the voices.” Right. The play. He eyed the book, forgotten about in the corner of his desk.

“I’d rather you rest.” 

“You should sleep, too.” He could tell you were fighting your own exhaustion. He pulled out his chair, moving Ray’s coil to the side to make work of his assignment again. 

“I’d rather you did, first.” He opened to the page he left off on.

“Egon.” You sounded scarily sober. He turned in his seat to face you.

You freed yourself from the blanket a bit. “You’re tired. You always look tired.” Another state of inebriation was taking hold of you. Maudlin. You were drunk. It didn’t mean anything.

He chewed at the inner part of his bottom lip before speaking again. “You’re very stressed. And you’re going to wake up feeling like hell.” He searched for the right words to convince you to let yourself go. “I’ll sleep too, and we can talk to each other in our dreams.” A little ridiculous, but it’s not the craziest thing he’s said to a tippler.

The hammered part of you was contemplating it, before you smiled and nodded. Before he went back to his work, you called for him one more time.

“Egon?”

“Yes?”

“I need a lullaby.” You had the same devilish, teasing look in your eye as you did when you were sober. He looked around in confusion as you looked towards him expectantly, before he surrendered, winding up a small snow globe that Peter kept out, even in Spring. As it played, you shook your head.

“No, sing the one by Manfred Mann.” He grabbed the edge of the blanket, pulling it over your head as you laughed uncontrollably to yourself.

“Goodnight.”

Egon had fallen asleep over his book some time later. As he came to, he looked back, hopeful to still see you, sleeping soundly. His hope faltered as he took in the empty space, neither his roommates returned or your spot on Ray’s bed filled in by your shape. There was a strange emptiness in his chest, knowing you were gone in a matter of hours. The only proof of your presence was the used bottle of isopropyl in the corner of his desk.

His breath slowed, light of the early morning burning into his eyes as he slowly rose out of his chair. Walking off, not sure if he was going to shower, or eat, or what, he noticed a small paper on the pillow. He picked it up, wondering if it would disappear in his hands.

“Thank you, Doctor.” He folded it back. You were drunk. It didn’t mean anything. But he still smiled.

[historia-vitae-magistras]

A lightee ask than usual but do you have any food or eating habit thoughts?

Ooohooohh, I did a whole ass seminar on the history of food. Failed it because I almost bled to death but I got to keep all the material! I've got.... a lot of thoughts and feelings about food culture. Too goddamn many, tbh. This got really long so I'll have to do a part two for other characters if wanted but lol enjoy.

Alfred:

 —Actually pretty gourmet little shit when he's got time and effort. He's made food Maria loves so often she has to give up on pretending she didn't enjoy it because fucking hell, he makes good chilaquiles after they've been drinking and fucking. There is, however, a non-zero chance he hasn't eaten a vegetable since the Nixon administration.

 —With that combustion engine metabolism, he's also perpetually hungry, so he eats whatever is around him. His guts do not like this, especially when it's a lot of dairy.

 —He has that kind of lactose intolerance that's tied to his health and stress, so if he's been particularly freaked out lately, he'll remind the world of his nuclear arsenal when he's got to use the toilet after that triple cheeseburger with a side of deep-fried cheese curds.

 —He's a stress eater too. He eats every negative emotion he's ever had especially when he's trying not to binge drink or do drugs.

 —He’s exceptionally food-motivated. They didn’t call one of his first major historical eras ‘the starving time’ without reason. He has preferences, but food is also food, and he’ll genuinely enjoy it in most forms as long as it's not rotten or otherwise godawful. Cowboy coffee and beans for ten days straight, and he will genuinely be the only man on that cow trail not sick of it by the end.

 —This also goes into why he’s so generous with food. He’s big on homemade food. He’ll make a whole big ass batch of like some sort of mac and cheese, and all the neighbours will get a big ol’ bowl of it with an ‘oh just return the Tupperware whenever,’ and it will genuinely be one of the best things they’ve ever eaten in their lives. Europeans recoil in horror, but our portion sizes are almost never single servings. It’s a generosity and hospitality practice except drinks. He really will down like a 2 liter of Slurpee in a single sitting.

 —He doesn’t mind eating alone. Actually prefers it sometimes. He loves eating in his car. American frontier culture, especially mountain men, had an often hyper-individualized, almost mythic culture of spending long periods alone in the woods and not being very sociable; thus a lot of situations where single servings were a thing, eating alone in quiet without something to do can be a real goddamn luxury.

 —He’s a really big protein guy with his metabolism. Sometimes exists on protein shakes but is more often a beef or barbeque or ham or alligator jerky. And a somewhat chunky Alfred is a healthy Alfred. A perfectly cut no flab Alfred is an Alfred who might be severely dehydrated and on several kinds of uppers.

 —He has better tastes than Arthur who didn't really realize food was supposed to taste good until like ten years ago but his combinations can be equally wild and unappetizing as they are batshit tasty.

—He loves spicy food. He's got so many opinions about hot sauces.

—He’s always hungry. If he isn’t hungry or turns down food, its genuinely a bad sign. If he turns down anything or just is just picking at it his food alarm bells should be sounding. He’s either about to declare war or puke all over the table or keel over dead. Peckish or food coma is his default state. Like if he was a smaller guy someone would say he’s got a binge disorder but he’s tall and beefy so he’s pretty okay.

 —Incredibly adventurous eater too. People will assume since there’s that old school culture of Anglo-American who eats the same 7 meals every week and might keel over dead if the meatloaf is slightly different he’ll be a bit hard to please but then he’s absolutely charmed by everything from Korean kimchi to Lithuanian Lašiniai.

 —He loves anyone who feeds him, just got to be a bit careful because he’s got surprisingly delicate stomach for the world superpower.

 —That American obsession with authencity means he’s surprisingly good at remembering people’s food culture or eating norms. He figured out chopsticks in ten seconds and quickly picked up the cues and manners of eating in any given culture. Still struggles with modulating his voice and personality, so he can often come across as rude, but he's so excited to do so. It's almost frustrating how happy he is to try and adapt to people around him and how happy he can be to fit in.

Matt:

 —He's a very good cook when he's putting in effort for other people, but he's not really like Alfred, who he'll make a whole ass meal for one just to relax on a Sunday.

 —He does tend to eat more vegetables than Alfred, but only because his northern vitamin deficiency has him binging them when he can afford them or they're available during the summer.

  —He can be weirdly picky on his own, but no one ever really needs to ask about his favourite food or how he likes anything because he always just goes with the flow around other people. “Just get me whatever you’re getting.” comes out of his mouth often.

 —There's a lot of sour cream/crema and yoghurt/coconut milk involved when he eats Mexican or Indian food for as much as he loves it.

 —Katya was singlehandedly responsible for his ability to maintain a normal weight during the 20th century by adding rye bread and perogies/vyrenki to his diet. He craves mushroom-umami flavours when he misses her, which is most of the time.

 —When he’s normal and eating the Anglo-North American diet, but he isn’t always eating it, he gets some strong sugar cravings, especially when he’s west of Manitoba. He’s as fond of birch syrup as a flavour as he is maple; there’s just less production. But the kind of deprivation he got and his own tendencies to not eat sometimes cause white sugar to just straight-up burns.

 —There's very much something of François to Matt's dietary habits, but less in his personal tastes and more in that he might be more sensitive to flavours. He has that kind of discerning and slightly oversensitive palate, but he’s a shitty perpetually broke frontier settler colony. He knows better/feels too guilty/is too embarrassed of himself to really indulge it.

 —He kept too much of his peasant communalism in his eating habits. Where Anglo-American communities did have a lot of cooperation, communal eating was a special occasion. The norm was based on the individual household. In contrast, French Canadian habitants still technically lived on medieval land plots and owed labour to a lord while also having a culture of seasonal male work, so Matt grew up used to communal ovens and eating most of his meals around others. Later, in Arthur’s jurisdiction, it was usually the same. He got a plate of whatever he was given, and it wasn’t something he had ever had to initiate himself.

 —Partially, he's sometimes exceptionally bad at eating when he has to choose to do it himself. Especially since the Americanization of the food culture took hold in the '80s and '90s. Whereas Alfred is food motivated from going without when he was little, Matt learned how to block out physical sensation until he collapsed because it was rare that someone, including himself, cared about what kind of state he was in. He just doesn’t eat at all when he’s stressed or anxious. And now it's his sole responsibility to do so as there aren’t the same community structures. He has a lot of Alfred’s abundance now, all the brunch and BBQ places anyone could ask for, but it hasn’t meshed with his eating habits. His people gave up so much of their communal eating in exchange for various choices and then wondered why they were so lonely. So he’ll just microwave a potato or a packet of Kraft dinner a day for a week straight and wonder why he feels dead because, technically, he did eat something. It’s seriously a miracle he got as tall as he did.

 —Feed him nothing but hardtack for three years, and he won't complain until he's dropped dead of scurvy. If Arthur puts some sort of godforsaken mixture of plum sauce or gin-infused spag bol in front of him, he’ll compliment it before he disassociates to get at least some of it down.

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

2nd September 2024, Monday

need to fix my sleep schedule because wdym i feel relatively rested because i got more than 4 hours of sleep?? this shit being regular is not healthy bro

day 8/50 productivity challenge

🕒 7:00 a.m. - kinda usual for school

morning skincare

extended duolingo streak

cleaned out photos + email

actually ate breakfast wow

off to school !!

crushed my biology seminar yay

back home !!

texted my bestie love that bish sm

practiced playing keyboard - 30 mins

journalled - 2 pages studying human memory made me realize i have some repressed memories about some bad shit in my past, bullying *sigh*

made iced coffee yum

*another sigh* doomscrolled again + fell asleep for a few hours

planned my next few days (realized that ganesh chaturthi is coming up & i'm excited because my apartment celebrates it quite grandly, this year it'll be from saturday till next sunday)

took bath

night skincare

folded laundry

planned the sequence of events for the second chapter of my fanfic

🕒 1:30 a.m. - slow fixing

i know i didn't actually do any studying, today was more of a rest day

i think i'm going to stick with this current format of posting for now. it's efficient enough for me.

[caffeinefics]

STEM major Draco Malfoy and his Hogwarts drop out trophy boyfriend

The comute from Draco's Magic Uni to home is atleast an hour long. Everyday he spends 2 hours traveling because their home is not hooked to the floo network to ward off persistent paps and stalkers.

Draco is NOT a morning person. Harry had to drag him out of the bed and into the shower and shove food into his zombie boyfriend. Whenever Harry is not looking, Draco will just hurry back to the bed and bury himself under the cover.

"Just like a ferret", Harry would tease him, only to end up with a face full of pillow for his troubles.

All nighters. ALL NIGHTERS. Coffee. COFFEE. Deadlines. Projects. Assignments. Conferences. Seminars. Electives. Mid-term, mid-term and finals.

But don't worry, Harry Potter comes to the rescue yet again. When Draco plans to pull all nighters to meet deadlines and catch up with his course materials, Harry would gently bonk him in the head, tell him to stop spoiling his health and drag him to bed.

Post war Harry with a lot of free time on his hands = working out = Broad shoulders to cry on.

"I swear Potter, I was smarter in school. I was top 3 in our year, Merlin! Now I don't understand anything. I'm literally the dumbest person in my class."

"Should I drop out?", "Can we start a small family business instead?", "Maybe I should drop this class. Oh no oh no I should have chosen a different major", "Who needs a degree anyway?"

The Saviour of the wizarding world is all ready for the exam seasons. The fridge is well stocked, and Draco's desk is filled with all the necessary stationery, snacks and a self-refilling water bottle.

Massage breaks, which turns into a different kind of massage. But at the end of it, Draco is all relaxed and mushy. It's the result that matters, not the procedure, (don't tell his scientist boyfriend though)

The end-of-exam seasons are punctuated with movie marathons and all the desserts in the world. Couch cuddles and lazy morning sex.

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 3, Episode 11- "I Solemnly Swear..." (That I Have No Memory Of Anything That Happens In This One Based On The Title)

The opening credits of this episode confirm we will finally be introduced to Alex (yay)! Alex stan here! Although quite honestly, I'm interested to see whether or not he lives up to the hype I've built up for him in my memory. .Stumbling almost totally blind into a mid-season episode is thrilling in a really pathetic way. I am being informed this is one of the lowest rated episodes of the entire series, but some low stakes mid season filler can still be good for the soul. Emily's former maid, Gerta from Germany, is suing Emily for wrongful termination after she was fired for being a Noisy Walker. Ah, rich people.

Lorelai sits amongst the delicious looking fake food whilst observing Sookie and Jackson having a loud culinary-based argument.

Lorelai puts Michel in charge while she and Sookie attend the seminar where Lorelai will meet her new totally fine and criminally under-rated B-Tier-Not-Luke Boyfriend, Alex, who shines bright but quickly burns out like a falling star, never to be seen or mentioned again. Presumably he is the second victim to be sucked in by the Male Gilmore Girls Character California Wormhole (Max was first, but eventually escapes). We learn Michel attended a fancy French hospitality college, while Lorelai has to attend a seminar at a Radisson called "How To Run an Inn". But then a witch put a curse on him so he ended up working for nickels at a tiny bed and breakfast in Nowherefuck USA. Tale as old as time. I made that last part up, but The Hollow is still where dreams go to die. Something had to go wrong in his life for him to fall so far. Michel: I predict it will be a total waste of time and money and I will be here to laugh at you when you return. So will I, Michel. So will I. Some more newspaper/Francie crap. Skip skip skip, skip to my loo... Maybe I'm missing something important, but it's a risk I'm always willing to take. The scene goes on forever (4 minutes). Lorelai recives an answering machine message from Emily's lawyer, who is voiced by...Seth MacFarlane. Peter, Brian, and Stewie Griffin and the guy who was bullying Lorelai at her college graduation. It's hard to unhear this dude as anyone but Brian Griffin. Anyway, Stewie is calling to request Lorelai give a deposition at German Gerta's trial to which Lorelai steadfastly refuses, but then a few seconds later changes her mind. Yawn. Lorelai and Sookie go to the boring seminar, then leave the boring seminar. They eat some free cookies in the hallway. ALEX, ALEX, ALEX...

Wheee!

He was just as hawt as I remember. Teehee! The first piece of Alex Lore we are blessed to recieve is that he is a business partner of some spazzy dude that Sookie used to party harty with back in the day, 14 hour booze and pot benders and what not, and the two fellas want to open a chain of coffee shops together. Well, at least they're not attending the Luke Danes School of Serving Folgers And Pretending it's Gourmet seminar. Alex, why are you so hot? Even his voice is hot! And funny too! Damn it Salty! You know what happens to him. Remember the cardinal rule you learned in Recapping 25 Year Old TV Shows School- Do not get attached to single-digit-episode guest stars! It's been less than a minute since he first appeared on screen, and I'm already enamored with their immediate and obvious chemistry. They tried to force that same type of chemistry/ dynamic with Jason through an entire season and it fell completely flat on its face. And I can tell you why (besides the fact that Jason and his storyline sucked eggs). In my humble opinion, JasonDiggerStiles was too similar to Lorelai. And it's never wise for Lorelai to date herself. It opens up a terrifying vortex, one which the world's premier Vortex Scientists have dubbed "Season 4".

An incredible businessman and probably good in the sack, too. Uh, just a hunch.

You two are going to break my heart. Until then I'll just try to enjoy the ride. More Francie crap. I am going to skip skip skip but I do want to observe what's on the lunch menu at the Chilton caf.

Mashed potatoes with gravy, asparagus, an apple and a can of Redbull for Paris. Rory is having her favorite beverage, a Hansen's soda (Raspberry flavor); along with a bag of Doritos. Plus, some kind of sandwich, but it's not her usual Prison Cafeteria Special of two slices of white bread. It looks to be some kind of wheat or rye bread with unidentifable innards. Possibly a BLT or roast beef with tomato? And a book for some nourishing carbohydrates.

A better view. We have deli meat.

I'm still skipping past the Francie crap, but I have several important questions first. Since when does Chilton have a parking garage? A dimly lit, empty one at that? Are there enough students and faculty for a parking garage to make sense? Is this parking garage ever seen again? Is this somewhere off campus?

Ahhh! There has been one Dimly Lit Confrontation per episode for the last 3 episodes. Dean vs. Jess on the dimly lit street. Dean vs.Jess in a dimly lit school hallway. Rory vs Ginger Spice in a dimly lit parking garage. But this one lacks the steamy sexual tension of the previous two. Pass. Back at the Inn, Michel admits to Lorelai he once...killed a dog? I think? Doggy annoyed Michel and doggy went bye bye? Wink wink? I don't want to think about this. Sookie's spazzy friend from the seminar shows up at the Inn sans Alex, which means he is irrelevant to me. Mr Irrelevant Joe doesn't know Sookie is married and admits he's had a decade long crush on her. Now she has to break his heart. Oh, sweet, sweet, pointless filler. Lorelai exclaims "That's some real Gatbsy pining." I mean, Luke came pretty close to Gatsby levels of pining. Where's his recognition?

Worth a shot. Sookie tells the Joe guy that she's married. He understands. We will probably never see him again. The end.

Embrace it, my Lesbian Whore friend. Rory and Lorelai rehearse sample questions for the upcoming court deposition. Yawn.

The kid has a lot on his metaphorical plate these days, you know? Cut him a break. You know what fucking bothers me? I have this clear memory of Jess making a brief appearance in this scene where Luke berates him (in person) for screwing up the food order! Time to go full conspiracy theory mode. What are They hiding from us? Where is Jess? How deep does the rabbit hole go? Since when is Jess responsible for placing supply orders for the restaurant in addition to waiting and bussing tables for meager tips, working at Walmart, and going to school (sometimes)? That's your job, Uncle Luke. And if he screwed up the order, you're still his manager, why weren't you supervising him? Is he getting a raise for these additional responsbiltiies or is he still getting paid in acorns? Stop the madness! I KNOW HE WAS IN THIS SCENE! More Francie crap. This time its between Francie and Paris in a bathroom with a tampon dispenser serving as a lovely backdrop. LET'S WRAP IT UP, PEOPLE. Rory and Paris vent their (sexual) frustrations through a fencing match. Paris is mad at Rory for reasons I don't understand or care about. Emily is mad at Lorelai for being both too honest and too unserious at the deposition. Jackson is mad at Sookie because he thinks she cheated on him with Irrelevant Joe and blows up at her. Yawn. Then more Francie crap. There is way too much estrogen in this episode.

But with less than a minute remaining, Alex calls and saves the day. He provides a much needed boost of testosterone to wrap up the episode. And I get to see his furnishings. Well, I was already informed of this, but if i didn't know, now I'd know...what I'm saying is there are fingerpainted pictures on the wall behind him. The dude has small kids. He's a confirmed DILF! Michel leaked Lorelai's phone number to Alex and we thank him for that. I'm still not going to overlook the whole erasing a dog thing.

You mean like how Luke buys Folgers and disguises it as his own blend?

Smooth as a fresh jar of Skippy.

...Says the woman who doesn't know when she's being duped with supermarket coffee (even when its being scooped from the can 2 inches from her face) and puts coffee grounds in the freezer.

Yayyyyy Alex and Lorelai! Yay! He is the only Luke Substitute I will accept for Lorelai. So I'm just going to go LA LA LA LA! for now while pretending this ship doesn't sink as quickly and spectacularly as the Titanic 2.0. Salty is quite pleased with this last-minute-of-the-episode, predictable turn of events. It will make up for the complete lack of Jess (and Luke) in this episode. Jess appeared in name only through The Great Lettuce Screwup of 2003, and in my hazy false memories. On the brighter side, it was also a Certified Dean-Free episode. This show is BORING without Rory's stupid boyfriends.

I do not get why we are suddenly looking at Lorelai through a window like someone is stalking her from outside the house. Dean, is that you? This episode was so threadbare plotwise that it was my first one-shot recap in a LONG time (it still took me over 3 hours to write, though! So your comments, feedback and reblogs always brighten my day and make all the effort worth it). As is the new tradition, here's the (wimpy) End of Episode Bingo Card.

[hai7ani]

to be loved is to be seen / Nutella

Whenever you're on your period you tend to crave for some bread. Preferably, they are thoroughly spread with generous amounts of Nutella without the skin.

That's just how it is 一 for or all the years you've lived as a woman, bread with Nutella during that time of the month has always been your guilty pleasure.

Today at work your colleague stops by your desk with a cup of coffee in hand.

"What are you having for lunch today?" She juts her chin towards the Hello Kitty lunchbox you always bring to work.

"Hmm, I don't know. Let's check," you grin, excitedly opening up the metal box.

2 slices of bread, each one folded in half with thick layers of Nutella spread on them. On the side there is a small container of grapes and a packet of biscuits of your favourite brand.

A light, sweet lunch, as you prefer on days like these, and you smile.

The usual.

But your colleague giggles beside of you. "Are you sure this doesn't belong to your daughter?" You look up at her at that. "Or did your husband mix up the boxes?" That triggered a series of laughter between you both.

Another colleague pokes her head into your cubicle. "Oh, Nutella again! My kids love it. I've tried it once and I never did again. It's too sweet for me, but you seem to like it a lot." She laughs.

You only bite your lip and look at them sheepishly. "I like it sweet. It's kind of a guilty pleasure."

They leave you alone afterwards, not before teasing you for having such a sweet tooth (and also whispering to you that they are just joking), but you don't take any of it to heart. You know they don't mean anything by it despite the constant tease about your little lunchbox that you match with your daughter and the kiddish contents in it.

They know your husband packs your lunch everyday 一 a habit he's picked up on ever since your daughter has started school and he's decided to takeover your little routine 一 and that you always either have sweet stuff or sandwiches for lunch on most days of the week.

But what they don't know is that despite the many years of craving for and having Nutella with bread as a guilty pleasure on the end of every month, you've spent more time watching other kids have it for breakfast in school.

Money wasn't very flexible in your home. Everything went to something and very rarely it ever went to you 一 growing up it was either hard-boiled eggs dipped into packets of soy sauce from the cheap, cold sushi only your parents get to eat or bread with butter from the buffet they attend on special occasions.

Never Nutella like the others kids eat everyday.

The first time you've ever tasted it was on the second date with your now-husband, outside the library of the engineering building many years ago.

(You met him at a seminar on improving public speaking skills. Fates intertwined together by a laggy spin-the-wheel website and he'd immediately pointed out the character printed on the shitty graphic t-shirt you were wearing that actually belonged to your roommate. You told him you don't actually know the character, but you do know the one on the fading sticker stuck to his laptop cover.

He'd asked you out right after the seminar ended (an unplanned topic of conversation that sounded a little different than what he meant, but since it sounded like that anyway, he took the chance as quickly as it came), hands stuffed into the pockets of his Levi's and an extremely red face for such a confident boy like him.)

He was biting on a piece of bread with some brown spread on the surface, sweat rolling off his forehead as he hastily jogged towards you on the sidewalk. "Sorry I'm late, my presentation ended a little later than I'd expected."

He was only 7 minutes and 10 seconds later than the time you both agreed on, yet the boy still rushed to see you straight after class in his wrinkly college t-shirt that he always forgets to iron after laundry.

"Have you eaten yet? It's kind of a long walk to the restaurant. Hold on," he then reaches a hand behind to grab a flat Tupperware from his black backpack, and showed the opened container to you.

"It's Nutella bread." He said, and you'd looked at him dumbfounded. "Do you... like it?" He faltered a little at your expression and out of your eagerness to not disappoint or embarrass the poor boy, you grabbed the last piece of bread and held it still in your hands, unsure of what to do with it.

"I..." You trailed off. "I think so."

"Huh?"

"I've never had Nutella before."

Three best friends slid past you both and they whispered. You thought they must've heard you and they must think it is ridiculous for a person to not have eaten Nutella before in their entire life.

You reddened and looked away from him out of embarrassment. Now he must think you are a joke. He doesn't wanna go out with you anymore 一 what a loser.

...He didn't think of you that way, though 一 not at all. Instead, he let out a laugh that made you jerk your head back towards his face and you remember feeling your heartbeat quicken behind your bones, threatening to fall out of your chest simply at the innocent sound of his boyish laughter.

"Yeah?" He was already reaching into his backpack again by the time you've regained your composure and was finally holding the slice of bread properly.

"That's great then," and he'd fished out a tub of Nutella with a wiggly plastic knife in his hand, "have some more." He scooped a generous amount of the cocoa spread and slaps it on your bread.

?

This boy...

"I always carry this with me in case I get hungry in class so I can DIY a snack." He said excitedly, "you'll like this, I swear. It's my favourite."

He then folded your bread and gently pushed your hand to your mouth. "There," and he keeps all his stuff back in his bag before huffing a breath. "Let's go." He ushers you with him.

The first time you've ever had Nutella, you had it with 6pm orange painting your skins and the boy you married talking your ear off about the menu from the restaurant he found online.

You ended up not finishing your meal and handed it over to him who happens have a really huge appetite because you were too busy eating his tub of Nutella. Just like he said 一 you liked it. A lot.

You still like it now that you're married to him and have given him a daughter who is just as confident as him when he was his younger, boisterous self.

A silly engineering nerd who now likes packing your lunch the same way he does for your daughter who prefers strawberry jam on her bread instead into your matching lunchboxes.

The things you never got to have when you were a child.

He knows.

They don't.

It's alright, though 一 you think it makes your silly Nutella bread a little more sweeter.

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

Blackstaff Academy: Part 4

Gale had invited you to his home, no, his tower, that was all you could think to yourself as you walked home, cradling your books in your arms. You had wanted to research healing magic and now you had somehow found yourself agreeing to meet Gale at his tower to discuss a Weave seminar. It seemed like an odd dream as you made your way home to your humble cottage, a one bedroom and homely place that you had inhabited for the last few years.

It did not take long for you to walk home, your mind reeling and daydreaming made the journey feel shorter. The door to your cottage was ever a sticky one, you had a special way of rattling your key in the lock to open it, every time it made you smile, the cottage was not perfect but neither were you, it felt like you were made for this place and it was made for you. Finally walking through the door you sighed, your shoulders slumping under the weight of the books you were carrying, dropping the extensive reading material onto the table before heading to the small living area, plopping yourself onto the old and well loved couched, you may have fished it from the sidewalk of a neighbouring town but you loved it no less, you felt no shame that it was a cast off, it was perfect for you, a second best and underappreciated. Your family never asked how you were fairing at Blackstaff, it was a prestigious school and you would have hoped they would be proud of you by now, ever looking at the letter box, hoping they would have sent something to you. Yet it was not so, you would sit always alone at your quaint cottage grasping onto the hope that you would be loved one day.

Sitting in your lonely chair you recalled Gale’s proposition after a moment, a request to meet him in his tower to plan a seminar on The Weave, the one he had previously scrutinised your own teaching on, why on earth would he want you to help him teach it now? You sighed and leaned back in your old sofa, wondering if he meant it or if it was a joke, then your mind floated to something else. Thinking how handsome he looked as he read his books, how enrapturing he was when he spoke about the Weave, how passionate he sounded when he spoke to you last.

You shook your head and tried to cast him from your mind, even now you thought of him. You spent a full semester avoiding him only to be unravelling at the seams now, daydreaming of him, letting the memory of him make you blush. You moved swiftly from your chair, washing the dishes in your sink to clear your mind, how could you face him again, you did not know if you would blush before him or be indifferent, you didn’t know if you hated him of if you were enamoured with him now, the confusion swirling in your mind. The night drew on and you gained no sleep, Gale ever on your mind, flitting between him criticising your lesson and then remembering him at the library, how handsome he looked enthralled in his research. You finally decided that you would meet him, casting aside your first impression of him, you were not optimistic about the wizard, but you believed he deserved a second chance at the very least.

Dawn broke but you did not wake properly, it was still half term and you very much relished the late starts to the day, rolling over and spreading out in your bed, enjoying the comforts of it for another hour before you finally had to rise. It finally became time for you to wake properly for the day, annoyed as you were than you had to leave your bed you did not grumble under your breath. Beginning your daily ritual of breakfast and coffee before looking at what the calendar demanded of you. Today was the day you would meet Gale at his tower, you pinched the bridge of your nose forgetting that you had agreed to this meeting the day prior, you wanted to help explore the weave yet something was holding you back, you were hesitant to meet him, nervous from your previous interactions. Gale was a prodigy, you were not, it brought up all the insecurities you had from your upbringing with your sister, worried that Gale would look down upon you and decide that you were not worthy of his time or the magic you learnt to wield.

After your coffee you felt calm as you walked through the streets of Waterdeep, an oxymoron in your mind but it helped to assuage your nerves for now, feeling that you were somewhat ready to meet Gale in his tower. The streets of Waterdeep were beautiful this time of day, the afternoon glow shining against the watercolour windows, musing to yourself that it was a shame that you never took notice when you walked them previously, now admiring the architecture of every building, anything to take your mind off your meeting with Gale. Once you arrived at Gale’s tower you gave a hesitant knock, craning your neck upwards to take in the majesty of the building as you waited for a response, nervously tapping your fingers against the book in your hands, waiting for the door to open, wondering if he would be condescending like you thought him to be, or would he be the Gale you met in the library yesterday.

A few silent moments pass, convincing yourself that he would not answer, that this was all just a joke at your expense. You were ready to turn away from the tower and walk home, your head hanging in shame until you heard rustling behind the thick wooden door. Your ears pricked up at the noise, sounding like someone was hurrying to tidy things away but you could not be sure as you stood there awkwardly tapping away at your book, waiting to see if someone would open the door.

“Ah Tav!” Gale opened the door slightly flustered yet enthusiastic to see you, greeting you as if you were an old friend. “Thank you for coming, please come in, I have many a fine wine and wide selection of food for you” You walked into his tower hesitantly, ignoring his comments as you took in your surroundings, it was not dirty but it was messy, giving the impression of a scholar that had gotten carried away with work, reading too many books and scrolls at a time. The air was filled with the scent of old parchment, a scent that you breathed in deeply to make you feel at ease, books had been your only solace for a significant part of your life, a place you could escape to, to learn and to grow your knowledge.

“Shall we?” Gale’s voice was chipper and excited as he guided you to the second floor of his home, leading you to his library, the one place where he could feel at peace and the one room he spent most of his time in. It felt surreal to you to be in his house, the one man you avoided for a full semester had welcomed you into his home. You followed Gale up the winding staircase, wondering where he was taking you, still thinking in the back of your mind if this was truly a good idea, until you reached his library, then your eyes lit up. The library was vast to say the least books upon books and various scrolls littered around any open space, it was not a large room by any means, but the knowledge encapsulated in it was incredible. You stood there in the threshold of the door, taking in the sight of the room, imaging what you could accomplish with even a fraction of this knowledge.

Gale stood watching you taking in the sight of his library, his eyes soft as he took in your shocked state, he had always thought it was excessive to keep this many books littered about but your response made him happy, you had not spoken but he could read your body language, the hunger behind your eyes for all the knowledge that you could see before you. A smile broke upon his face before he interrupted your thoughts with a slight cough “I have some wine and food for us Tav.” Gale chuckled under his breath as he saw you come back to reality, realising that you were here for a purpose. You took you seat opposite him on the antique table, thinking to yourself that this too was old and expensive, worried that you would damage it in any way. You placed your book down beside you on the floor before turning to Gale, wondering what his motive for this meeting was, still sceptical about the man, trying to gauge what he really invited you here for, not believing it was to collaborate on a seminar of the weave.

Gale was oblivious to your look, taking a glass of wine that was before you both on the antique table, after all what occasion could not be improved by wine, is what he thought to himself when he chose the bottle of Arrabellen Dry for you both to enjoy. Gale swirled the wine before savouring the flavour as he sipped it, enjoying the woody notes that this brand was famous for. It was a silent few moments as you watched Gale nonchalantly sip the wine before you, the burning question on your mind burst forth from your lips without you even thinking. “Why am I here Gale?” confusion lacing your words, your arms clutching against each other, trying to assuage your anxiety, thinking this was all just a joke.

A confused and hurt look washed over Gale’s face as you spoke “You are here to help me with the seminar?” The hurt look on Gale’s face made you sad, you did not want to hurt him, but you did not trust him. You took a deep breath and decided to tell him the truth, about how you thought he belittled you and disliked you, criticising your lesson on the first day, facing away from him as you spoke, confrontation was never your strong point, thinking even now it would not serve you to be confrontational with your colleague, yet you could not stop yourself from speaking. Gale listened intently to your words, feeling hurt himself that he ever made you feel less than worthy to channel the weave and even more sad that you believed he thought so little of you.

“Well Tav, apologies are very much in order I feel, yet first I shall introduce myself properly to you, it was a disservice on my part to not do so when we had first met” Gale stood from his chair opposite you and moved towards you, straightening his clothes and brushing the lint away before he stood upright in front of where you were sat. Gale bowed with a hand on his chest, and one stretched out before you, looking up through his long eyelashes he spoke. “I’m Gale of Waterdeep, a wizard of renown and one with a weakness for a good book and a glass of wine, a pleasure to meet you” He knew that he was never a suave man, trying to rely on things he saw Astarion do in his months of travelling with him, hoping that this would work on you. You took his hand gingerly in your own, feeling the warm skin of his hand upon your own made your heart flutter and smile at him, feeling the slow heat of a blush creep upon your cheeks, perhaps you were wrong about Gale.

Gale took your hand in his and kissed it gently with a smile, hoping his awkward act as Astarion had worked. He enjoyed watching the blush spread to your face from his action, having watched you from afar for so many weeks. It pained him to hear that you had disliked him for so long but seeing your smile and the blush upon your cheeks was encouraging to him, knowing that he still had an option to court you properly.

[songmingisthighs]

Stupid Lucky Rain

group : xikers

pairing : student!hyunwoo × student!reader

genre : fluff, university!au, strangers to lovers

word count : 10.1 K

note : part of the "Meet Me Under The Cherry Tree event by @cultofdionysusnet

a/n : hyunwoo need to STAHP being a freeloader in my mind like SIR RENT IS DUE I WILL NAWT TOLERATE SQUATTERS @flowerboykun I'm blaming you for enabling me writing for xikers <3 and GHAWD THIS TOOK SO LONG AND I DID NAWT MEANT FOR IT TO BE THIS LONG ???? THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A TIMESTAMP ????? WTF HAPPENED ??????

buy me coffee ?

You never really liked your university. There were a lot of problems with not just the students and the teaching staff but also with the general management of the place and just the thought of it made you so mad honestly. What made you even more pissed was that the school was your choice because you were so drawn to the campus's open concept; the cherry blossom trees in spring, the stone path to each building, and the happy students everywhere. The decision was solely on you because your parents had even suggested that you go to school in another city but you just HAD to go to this school. So really, you have nothing and no one to blame for your shitty experience but yourself.

Days like this one, when nothing seems to be going your way or even just going right generally, truly made you feel so angry at nothing and no one but at the same time at everything and everyone. Thursdays were never your favourite day but since university, it has taken a rather worse turn. Your last class of the day with the WORST professor in your major talked your ears off which made the class run longer than it should and God forbid someone remind him that class was supposed to end AGES ago. So now, you're stuck by the entrance of your building because it was raining and you didn't even think to bring your umbrella. Now you resented the open concept your university had because what even the fuck was anyone thinking.

Whoever romanticize spring rain needs to have their mouths stuffed with wet cherry blossom flowers. Because while it looks so so so pretty, it's still a pain in the ass to deal with.

"You can't help me?" you groaned into the phone. You had hoped your friend who lived in the dorm could come with an umbrella and help you get home but alas you were met with YET ANOTHER disappointing answer. "I'm sorry, we have a dorm meeting in 5 minutes because someone got caught sneaking her sibling in after hours and all of us are getting punished with her," she sighed, obvious that she was disappointed with her own situation. Not wanting to make her feel bad, you assured her that it was fine and even mustering up a goodbye to her before hanging up. After the call ended, however, you couldn't help but slump down the wall nearby and covered your face with your bag to let out a muffled frustrated scream, completely oblivious that someone was listening in and even watching what was going on with you.

Hyunwoo knew you. Well, he knew OF you as you shared a class with his friend, Sumin and while he had yet to have direct interaction with you, he was well aware of general things about you. How you have classes mostly in the same building except for one in the seminar hall that you shared with his other friends, Seeun and Junmin (though he doesn't think they'd realize), how you seemed to have quite some close friends but you seemed to still be well known around campus, and how you seemed to cringe when you're under a tree that you frequent and a breeze decided to interrupt you. But all that knowledge seemed useless because Hyunwoo didn't even know your name. He couldn't tell his friends that he was interested in you (for a lack of better word) because he know that Sumin is (embarrassing) not going to let his interest slide as platonic. So he kept (suffered alone) to himself and just watch you from afar, sometimes getting a chuckle or a grin at your antics. For a lack of better explanation, Hyunwoo considered himself intrigued by you and now that he was able to get a close-up look, he was, for a lack of better words, amused.

Determined to return home as soon as possible, so you can just wash the ick of the day and fall into a deep slumber where you can just fantasize about being a marshmallow (Or a rock, Tinnitus rules), you stood back up in a speed of light, surprising the person who was behind you. "I can do this, I can just run past this itty bitty rain and be home in no time," you mumbled to yourself, huffing and jumping slightly to prepare to take off. "Straight to the bus shelter, it's... Nothing, not that far," your head nodded along your words, starting to feel like you were being filled with positivity, "Yeah, yeah, it's no biggie whatsoever." Hyunwoo was grinning and chuckling to himself, amused at how you were trying to... survive? Does that make sense?

Not letting yourself hesitate much longer, you took off from your spot to face the seemingly worsening rain.

"Wait-,"

It didn't take long for you to slip and skid away several feet and land on a cherry blossom tree. To make your accident more unfortunate, the petals of the cherry blossom tree fell from the tree upon impact and scattered around you dramatically. Seeing this, Hyunwoo panicked and reached into his bag to fish out the umbrella his roommate, Junghoon, had placed for him, taking a moment to stare at the item in embarrassment because he could have gone to you and lent you the umbrella while he was (creepily) staring at you and your antics. Nevertheless, he shook his head and opened his umbrella to shield him before running over to you.

The closer he got, the more he could hear you sobbing whilst still in the same position as when you landed to a stop. Hyunwoo cringed and slowly leaned down so that his umbrella would also cover your face as it did with his. "Excuse me miss, are you okay?" he asked sympathetically, genuinely feeling bad that you had to go through such an embarrassing accident. Thankfully, you answered him, even if it was with an eery sarcastic laugh, "I'm... On top of the world, walking on Sunshine fantastic," you said as you closed your eyes, "And it's... Amazing that you saw me at my worst." Hyunwoo couldn't help but cringe at your words, wanting to be helpful but not quite knowing how to. "Uh... If this is your worst, I'm glad you're pulling it off," he smiled in awkward assurance, hoping that it makes your unfortunate accident perceivably better for you. Thankfully, you chuckled at him even if it was pathetic laughter (because if you hadn't, Hyunwoo might dig himself a 10-foot hole and just stay there until the embarrassment ebbs away.

He was just about to help you up and possibly asked if he could accompany you to wherever you needed to go but he heard his name being called (by a voice that sounded like an impatient Minjae) from the far distance. Afraid that he might get caught with a (cute) girl, Hyunwoo's eyes widened and his head snapped back to you who was beginning to it up. With a heavy heart, Hyunwoo handed you his umbrella and before you could ask him what he was doing, he gave you a charming smile that made your heart skip a beat.

"I hope you get back home safely."

That was all he said before he took his backpack over his head and dashed through the rain. "Wait," you called out, trying your best to stand up quickly, "I didn't get your name!" It was unfortunate that you didn't hear his friend called out for his name due to the heavy rain.

Unfortunately, the sound of the rain was louder than your voice and Hyunwoo was already quite far away. All you could do was stare at his retreating figure in sadness and conviction because how did he not fall and embarrass himself like you did and you hadn't gotten the chance to thank or talk to him. But you were at least safe from being (even more) wet on your journey home.

As you walked away, you couldn't help but look back at the tree where you landed. Usually, it would take you some time to recover from such embarrassment. Heck, you'd be angry at yourself, the tree, the pink petals, the sky, the weather, the grass, the pavement, the university, and maybe even the students that didn't fall like you did. So it surprised you to have walked away with a light heart and even gratitude. All thanks to that mysterious cutie who you didn't even get to look at properly before he ran off. You would've liked to appreciate his beauty first before you both parted. How had you never realized there was anyone as cute as he before? Why did you have to meet him in such an unfortunate circumstance?

You couldn't help but let out a final sigh before resuming your walk to the bus stop, hoping that you'd get to meet the stranger you met under the cherry blossom tree once again.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

"So he just gave you an umbrella... and ran?" you nodded at the question that was asked by one of your friends, Liz.

"And you had never seen him on this campus before?" your other friend, Rei, added and again, you simply nodded at her question.

All three of your friends smacked their foreheads with their palms, absolutely dumbfounded by how you handled the situation. "God, (y/n), how is it that these kinds of things seem to only happen to you?" Your last friend, Haewon, asked in exasperation. You couldn't help but groan and slumped down on the table before you, accidentally bumping your forehead on the hard surface which made Liz cringe. "And there she goes again," she teased, snickering but pushing your head slightly to see the red mark and your scrunched-up face and gently pressing her cold can of cola on the spot, "Dum dum."

Rei rested her chin on her open palm and tilted her head, "So, what are you planning on doing?" she asked. For a moment, all you could do was hum, not knowing what to do because you really do have no plans whatsoever. It had been five days since you saw the cutie who helped you under the cherry blossom tree and you hasn't seen him since and you were sure that you'd recognize him immediately. How can you forget his worried eyes that turned into adorable crescents when he smiled? How can you forget his soft, pastel green cardigan and white shirt that was paired with black jeans and white Adidas that somehow made him look like a model? How can you forget his melodious voice when he talked? And God, how can you forget the fact that he made you feel better without even trying? He was it, he was what you needed to motivate you to go to school and it might be just some dumb crush but you really do want to see him again.

Unbeknownst to you, Haewon had slipped her hand into your bag and taken the umbrella the boy had lent to you and waved it over her head as she rose to her feet slightly. "Is there a cute boy who is missing his umbrella because he lent it to a clumsy fool last week?" she yelled at the whole cafeteria out of the blue which made you yelp and immediately pulled her down just as people snapped their heads towards your table. "Are you nuts!?" you hissed as you hit the side of her arm in a scolding manner. Yet, Haewon only blinked her eyes confusedly at you, "Wha- me? I'm doing your job effectively! Don't you wanna meet this boy and then marry him?" Truly, you wonder how Haewon's mouth has yet to get her in trouble. "Not marry!" you whined at her to which she just rolled her eyes, "Fine, you're against marriage, but you want a future with him, no?" All you could do was groan and run your fingers through your hair, "Rei was more helpful when she couldn't help me with an umbrella last week," you muttered. Liz scrunched her nose at you and she couldn't help but add, "I mean... Had Rei helped you last week, Mr cutie wouldn't have been able to help you," to which you replied with a deadpanned look on your face that made her raise both of her hands slightly, "I'm just stating a fact here, you're mad at Haewon unnie, not me," she grinned sheepishly.

It wasn't like you were mad at your friends or anything because you were mostly mad at yourself for not being able to find the cutie. Granted, you had only seen him once but on a campus with a limited number of students walking around everywhere, statistically speaking, you should've been able to bump into him again in no time. But no time feels like yes time and yes, time sure was being a bitch because it felt like forever. Every day, you try to be more aware of your surroundings, be more aware of the people in case you see the cutie and every day, without fail, you brought the umbrella he lent you in your bag along with a little note of gratitude. In it was the usual thank you for helping your dumb ass and for making your day slightly better and at the bottom right corner, you had written your number for the purpose of "wanting to pay you back for your kindness. So text me when you're available :)" it's cheesy and you blame Liz.

Suddenly, someone approached your table, a guy who looked so innocent and he had the most adorable smile on his face. "Hi, sorry, is the rest of the seat taken?" he asked, tilting his head a little. you were sure that had you known him, you would've absolutely squished his cheeks and given him the biggest hug ever at any given time. "Oh, no, please," Rei gestured for him to take a seat on the space at the end of the table. "Thank you!" he cheerfully said before turning slightly and waving his hands, "Guys, I found a table!" The four of you couldn't help but turn around and watch as six more guys walked through the sea of people towards the direction of the table you were occupying. "Guys, I think we need to leave," Rei said, cringing at the number of people around but also at the thought of them having a hard time finding seats. The rest of you nodded and immediately packed your stuff and took your trays. Seeing this, the guy felt bad, "Oh, you guys don't have to leave!" he pouted, feeling bad because he thought you all left because of him. But Liz waved a hand at him and smiled, "No, don't worry! We need to go to class anyways!" which seemed to reassure him as he simply nodded and bowed slightly, "Thank you so much," he smiled.

Once you and your friends cleared, the guy's four friends soon came to the table just as the four of you left the table, giving the guy you interacted with one last wave (just for fun) which he happily reciprocated. "Yujun, dude, how'd you get them to leave?" Sumin smirked, chuckling slightly while setting his tray down. The other people in the group; Yechan, Junmin, Hunter, Junghoon, and Jinsik followed suit, taking their respective spots. "Probably by telling them something about snail penises," Yechan snickered at his friend whose expression dropped into an unamused one, "How're your books, Yechan, are they balanced?" he retorted back. But of course, Yechan being Yechan, he wasn't affected by his friend's words, he simply sit on his chair and plastered on (an obviously faux) innocent smile, "Better than your genealogy paper I'll bet," thankfully Junmin was there to stop either one of them to start throwing food at each other, only letting Yujun squeak out something about Yechan's response not even making any sense.

It seemed like you really do have rotten luck because not even five minutes after you cleared up, Hyunwoo walked into the cafeteria with two of his friends on his sides. "All I'm saying is," Seeun shrugged his shoulder to readjust his bag so he won't let go of his tray, "The idea that reality is all fake and that the physical world is all caused by ideas is plausible! For instance, what if the things you see around you aren't actually what they seem? What if the things that you see are just how your brain wants to perceive them? Or let's say there's a chair in a room. Who's to say that chair still exists when you leave the room because there was no one to perceive it?" God, Hyunwoo love his friends but sometimes he really does question why they became friends in the first place. The additional three guys soon approached the table you had just occupied, and to poke fun at you and your luck even more, Hyunwoo had chosen to sit on the spot you sat on. "For fuck's sake, Seeun, you took ONE philosophy class last semester. Move on!" Minjae complained, choosing a seat at the far end, near Yechan where he didn't have to deal with Seeun. However, Seeun only scoffed at his older friend, "By that logic, you should forget all your introductory classes because you had only taken those classes once, hyung."

"Hey, Hyunwoo's here!" Jinsik greeted his seemingly quiet friend in an attempt to stop more fights to break and even resume the potential fight between Yechan and Yujun. "How are you today, hyung?" Hunter, who was next to Hyunwoo asked before popping a piece of fish cake from his bowl of tteokbokki into his mouth. "Oooh look at him, isn't it obvious?" Sumin snickered, making Hyunwoo freeze in his spot while his pupils shook nervously, fearing that Sumin might know something, "Hyunwoo is sad because his little mysterious miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower hasn't been seen around." Immediately, Hyunwoo's head snapped to Junghoon who felt his friend's glare and he halted his movement just as he was about to take a spoonful of soup. Hyunwoo's eyes narrowed and Junghoon, without dropping his spoon back into his bowl, made a statement for himself, "I didn't know it was a SECRET secret, I thought it was a general knowledge secret."

Confused, Junmin looked between his friends with curiosity, "What? What miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower?" he asked, clearly wanting to know what everyone (some, but it didn't include him so he felt left out) was talking about. "Say those five words quickly like a tongue-twister, I dare you," Minjae snickered and soon the table erupted into a tongue-twister challenge battle, allowing Hyunwoo to just sulk in his seat.

It wasn't like he wasn't trying to find you because he absolutely did. He mulled over why he hadn't seen you in a while and made a plan to be able to see you which was basically to just frequent the cherry blossom tree where you fell. To be fair, he had only implemented the plan the day before so his success rate as of now was about the same as seeing a monkey juggling in a baby suit. Not to mention his busy schedule as a Food Technology student was not really allowing him much freedom. Still, he tried. He tried by studying under the tree, right on the spot you landed on and made sure to pass the tree when he got to the campus and when he was about to leave. But so far he hadn't had his luck meeting you again. The effort Hyunwoo put to present himself also doubled because he wanted to look nice for you. His usual fluff of hair was styled better (courtesy of Sumin) and his clothes were nicer (courtesy of Minjae), heck, he even found a new sense of confidence (courtesy of Yechan who said that they're one Christmas away from buying him a loom and call him the loonie roomie with a loomy).

"Hey, hey, hey, let's go back to talking about Hyunwoo," Minjae chuckled after seeing Sumin choke on his own spit. Yujun glanced at the oldest, blinking twice in confusion before stating, "Well, to be fair, we all got sidetracked because of you, hyung," Minjae's left eye twitch at the guy who was innocently nibbling on a piece of chicken on his fork but he managed a (forced) wide grin, "Well, I'm refocusing back to Hyunwoo," he said simply. Hearing this, Hyunwoo sat up straight and shrugged slightly, "I don't think there's much to tell, you know? It's just... Someone that I wished to have more interactions with," though he wanted to appear casual or even nonchalant, the slight pout on the corners of his lips betrayed him.

"Okay, now I'm confused," Sumin said, raising an eyebrow at his friend, "I've introduced you to a lot of people on this campus and you didn't seem to be interested in anyone. Who changed your mind??" "God, Sumin hyung, isn't it possible that Hyunwoo hyung is interested in someone who has NOTHING to do with you?" Hunter scoffed. The rest of the table was nodding at Hunter's words, agreeing with him. But it wasn't until Yujun turned to Hyunwoo that he realized Hyunwoo's ears, despite his face remaining a neutral colour, were bright red and seemingly hot if one was to touch them. Yujun's eyes widened and he squeaked, finger immediately pointing to his older friend who realized and whose eyes widened to saucers, "OH MY GOD, HYUNWOO HYUNG LIKES SOMEONE HE KNEW FROM SUMIN HYUNG!" he exclaimed loudly.

To avoid bombarding, Hyunwoo immediately packed his stuff and took his tray, "I don't have time for this," was the last thing he said before he ran off, leaving his friends complaining and booing at him.

On his way out to his next class, after putting his tray to where it was supposed to go, Hyunwoo slumped on a nearby wall and hung his head. It was embarrassing that he couldn't control his reaction and because of that, people now know that he was INTERESTED (not yet crushing) on someone that Sumin also knows. "God, my life is a joke," he muttered to himself before crouching down to tie his shoelaces that had become loose.

To mock his existence, just as his focus was on his feet, you ran right past him back into the cafeteria. You looked around and spotted the table you sat on before. As you rushed back to the table, Yujun looked up and beamed when he recognized you. "Oh! It's miss nice table sharer!" he exclaimed, causing people on the table to snap their heads at you, curious at what Yujun was talking about. You were stunned to be greeted like that, as evident by your rounded, blinking eyes, but you smiled at him, "Hi? And it's (y/n) if you wanna thank me more for giving you my table," you joked. Sumin swallowed the food he was chewing and nudged you on the hip gently, "Hey (y/n), what's up?" While you both were not really that close (even with the class you shared), you both were fond of each other and you knew that Sumin has a playful and friendly persona which was why everyone was comfortable enough to joke and poke with him. You pouted at him, "I think I left my wallet here by accident. If it's not here, then it must've fallen out when I was walking around and I might as well say goodbye to it," you sighed. The guys on the table were nice enough to immediately look around and even down under the table to help you locate your missing item. All but one. Junghoon quietly lifted your slightly tattered wallet up with a blank look on his face, "I didn't realize this was yours," he simply said. Minjae exhaled sharply and reached to pluck the item from his friend's grasp, "You're not supposed to take things that aren't yours, Junghoon!" he then handed you the item with a sheepish (almost embarrassed) look on his face, "Sorry about him, he can be peculiar." Junghoon scoffed and crossed his arms at Minjae's words, obviously dissatisfied, "Hey, at least I noticed the item before Hyunwoo hyung placed his tray on it."

Simply relieved, you hugged your wallet to your chest happily. "God, thank you for keeping it safe!" then you pat Sumin's head like how you would a puppy and lean down slightly to match his eye level, "I'll see you tomorrow at class, okay?" to which Sumin replied with his fingers that are supposed to indicate him saying 'okay' as his mouth was busy chewing. With the reply, you (once again) take your leave with a wave of goodbye and an extra enthusiastic one to Yujun who enthusiastically double-waved at you.

Once you were out of earshot, Yujun spoke up, "She's nice! How'd you know her, Sumin hyung?" "I knew her from my mandatory English class, she helps me a lot with essays but that's about it," the whole table nodded in understanding at that. But then they snapped their heads all at the same time at the sound of Seeun snickering. "What if that's the girl Hyunwoo hyung has a crush on?" Jinsik rolled his eyes and punched him lightly on the shoulder, "Pay attention dude, do you think Sumin would just use the people he knew from class as a potential match for Hyunwoo?" Seeun raised an eyebrow at his older friend challengingly, knowing full well what his defence would be, "There are endless possibilities of worlds. If you can think of it then it can exist in theory therefore anything is possible. However, nothing can exist without it being perceived by someone." And for the first time ever (since the second week of his taking his philosophy class), his response was met with nods of approval and even understanding.

"Hence, my earlier statement that things might just simply exist because there is someone to perceive them. Like the chair," as soon as those nods come, they were immediately replaced with groans and protests. Jinsik, Yechan, and Junghoon even threw their juice boxes at him.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

In the next three days, there were more close run-ins that happened between you and Hyunwoo that if you both realized would've caused your heads to explode.

The first occurrence was the day after the almost run-in at the cafeteria. You were paired with Sumin for a class discussion, even spending time making a report in class. It was a complete fluke (and by that, it was most likely orchestrated by destiny) that you were paired together because neither of you had ever gotten so close, not in the several months since you both took the class. Even by the end of the class you both walked out together to discuss more on the paper that you both were supposed to submit by that night. The two of you were so into your conversation that you didn't even realize that you had left your laptop in the classroom. "Shoot! I need to go back,": you turned around and cringed at the number of people walking slowly out of the class like a herd of sheep. Sumin chuckled and shook his head at you, "You're unbelievable, kind of like my friend Hyunwoo," he chuckled. You only rolled your eyes and nudged his body with yours lightly, "You're a jerk," your bottom lip dropped into a teasing joke, "Text me later about your part?" Sumin nodded in agreement with a smile, letting you know that he will do his part of the paper before you ran off. Sumin barely took two steps forward when the person he was talking about rounded the corner and patted him on the shoulder, "Hey man, you done?" he smiled widely. "Yup, you done checking the tree?" Sumin's words almost made Hyunwoo choke on his own spit, "How'd you know about that?" it was obvious that not even Hyunwoo could hide that fact. Sumin simply smirked and wrapped his friend in a friendly hug, "We got eight other close friends, man, how long do you think you would be able to hide that fact?"

The next occurrence happened the night Hyunwoo decided that he wanted to get some midnight snacks with Yechan and Minjae who were pulling an all-nighter at their dorms. It was an impromptu decision for all of them and Hyunwoo didn't even want to go in the first place but Yujun was giving him puppy eyes and Seeun annoyed him enough that he go to get them what they wanted (which, halfway out of his dorm, it had just occurred to him that both Yujun and Seeun could've gone out themselves). At the same time, you came out of your dorm clad in a hoodie, mask, and your comfiest pyjama pants because you were feeling pissed at yourself because you hadn't found the mystery cutie. No matter where you go, no matter what you do, it had been exactly seven days since that (un)fateful day and logically speaking (and if you were to put your trust in destiny's hands), the day you would've most likely to meet him again was today on similar circumstances (because it hadn't rained). So you waited and waited but the mystery cutie never even showed so you spent two hours after class for nothing only to come home to your door opened which means that one of your roommates was in your room and you were betting on the narcissistic kleptomaniac who has been shit-talking you behind your back. You were so ready for the new semester so you, Liz, Haewon, and Rei could move in together. Near tears, you got into the convenience store to gather everything you need to calm yourself down. The three guys were already in the convenience store, talking loudly with each other, laughing and joking around and even narrowly missing you; when you were in one isle, they were in the next, when you turned to stare at the rack, they passed you, even noticing your presence but not your identity. Out of the three however, Hyunwoo was the one who noticed the hard sigh you exhaled and the times you clenched your fists when you couldn't find something or saw that it wasn't in stock. Even when he was paying for the things he bought (which were mostly Yujun and Seeun's snacks), he couldn't help but turn his head to your crouching figure in front of the instant noodles, completely oblivious that you were the person he has been looking for this past week. When you paid for your item, the cashier put something you swore you didn't pick out earlier. "Excuse me, I don't think that's mine," you pointed out, making the cashier stop her movements. But she nodded her head in the direction of the door, "The guy before bought something for you," when the bag was in your hand and you were able to reach into the plastic bag and took out what she had put. During your walk out, you couldn't help but keep staring at the lollipop that had a smiling face on its wrapper. It was stupid maybe, but you were just so happy to have gotten it and just like that your day was made.

The last occurrence happened when Hyunwoo and you decided that maybe simply standing or watching near the tree was not enough, you have to be attached to the tree. So that Friday, after your morning class, you buckled down and settled on the grass, studying (or pretending to be) as you keep a lookout. "Okay, but can we at least get you lunch?" Liz asked, smiling sympathetically at you. You shook your head but Haewon rolled her eyes and linked her arm with Liz and Rei, "We'll just get her like a kimbap or something, she's definitely going to want to eat, she's just stubborn," she teased as she walked away. As they walked away, Hyunwoo parted ways from his friends and approached the tree, eyes filled with determination to finally meet you again and this time properly talk to you. Neither of you realized that you both were on opposite sides of the tree, blissfully unaware as you occupied yourselves with working on whatever you could work on. For thirty-five minutes the both of you could hear the other typing on their laptop or writing or opening up books but both of you thought those were the sounds that came from other students from the nearby tree. You didn't even hear the sounds anymore once your friend came back and sat down around you; Liz next to you and Rei and Haewon across you. As you chew on your kimbap, all four of you chatted, well, mostly the three of them because you were keeping your eyes on the people walking nearby, waiting for the mystery cutie to pass by not knowing that he was on the other side, smiling to himself at the sound of you four being so happy and carefree. He was rather intrigued because he noticed that there was a voice that got him feeling some sort of recognition and just as he was about to take a peek, he heard someone call his name from the building. "Dude, we have a rescheduled class 10 minutes ago, what are you doing?" his classmate called out, making Hyunwoo's eyes widen in realization and quickly pack his things. "Shit, this is bad," he muttered to himself as his hands tried to shove everything in as quickly as possible. But in his clumsiness, he accidentally let his water bottle roll away to the other side of the tree without him realizing it. Just as Hyunwoo strapped his backpack on, a voice halted his movements, "Here, I think you dropped this." He looked up to see a girl holding his water bottle and he immediately nodded and took it from her hands, "Thanks, uh..." "Liz," "Yeah, thank you, Liz," he smiled at her before rushing to his class. Noticing Liz talking, you tried to peek over and saw a guy in a rather clean-looking smart outfit running off into the building. "Who's that?" Rei asked, noticing what you saw as well, "Some guy, he dropped his water bottle and I helped," Liz shrugged. "He was cute," Haewon said before she nudged you with her foot, snickering slightly, "Do you think you wanna switch mystery cutie for him?" she teased. You took one last glance at the guy (or his back since that was all you could see) and shrugged, "My mystery cutie is probably like ten times more handsome," you stated obliviously as you munched on your kimbap, fully unaware that that was actually your mystery cutie.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Saturdays were your favourite as you have no classes and you have no responsibilities. As a university student, you didn't have much going for you nor do you have many options for entertainment. So more often than not, you utilize the campus facilities however you can. One of your favourites is the shuttle bus to the heart of the city which was not that far. Little did you know, Hyunwoo felt exactly the same way about being a student but his way of utilizing the university facilities is slightly different considering his friends are lawless hooligans.

That day, you had just gotten back from the mall with your friends and you decided to leave early because you had this feeling that you had forgotten something. Funny enough, it wasn't an umbrella because you found yourself always carrying mystery cutie's umbrella with you. Initially, it was just in case you accidentally bumped into him somewhere you didn't even think you'd bumped into him or something. Honestly after not meeting him for a whole week, you got the impression that there's a chance that he might not even be a student at the university (wrong). He could be a visiting student (wrong). Or maybe a transfer or even an international student doing a semester program (wrong). Would it be ridiculous to assume that he's a TA or even a new professor or a potential new TA or a potential new professor? (yes because it is so dumb to think that). So you went home by yourself and on the way, you realized that because you were going to be dropped off at the campus, you could maybe go around a bit to look at the campus life activity board to see if you could spot his face in the pictures there.

Meanwhile, Hyunwoo and some of his friends (Jinsik, Sumin, Junmin, and Hunter) decided that they wanted to spend some time at the gym. As active boys, it was important for them to burn energy somehow so that they wouldn't get into any trouble. Same principle as raising children. Or puppies. They have to tire themselves just enough to be obedient and not cause any mess. And it was fun or maybe just interesting to see the university that would usually be busy with the hustle and the bustle of busy busy students and their lives and their need to keep up with their schedules and ambitions. On Saturdays, Hyunwoo was able to simply appreciate the university as it is. He wasn't really sure of a university with an open concept as he would more often than not think about the practicality and even the effectiveness of it for students (other than giving something green to stare at and providing fresh air to students who spent most of their days in stuffy rooms with other students who looked just about done with studying). But he came to like the place and its concept and he was able to appreciate it even more ever since he saw you. He liked being able to find you in odd places every now and then which has now become frustrating because now that he actually wanted to meet you, you're nowhere to be seen like a Fata Morgana. Maybe he has to reach a certain level of desperation first.

Unlike the days before when he had to go to class and there was a higher chance of meeting you, Hyunwoo decided against dressing up. He let his usual flop of hair down and wore a loose sleeveless work shirt and training pants with his favourite workout shoes. It was him getting back to simplicity despite the protests of Minjae who insisted he wore an athleisure outfit which was stupid because although Hyunwoo looked absolutely amazing and he felt confident in the form-fitting shirt and parachute fabric pants, he couldn't move for shit and he was uncomfortable. So he ran out as soon as he changed so that he didn't have to listen to Minjae nagging at him for not listening.

"Are you ready to admit now?" Hyunwoo's reps on the chest machine halted at the question thrown by Sumin. "Admit what?" he asked with an eyebrow raised. Sumin dropped the dumbell he was curling before standing up and leaning next to Hyunwoo's machine, forcing the guy to strain his neck slightly to look at him, "That your little miss scattered-petal-umbrella-borrower is probably a figment of your imagination," he teased, smirking at the guy whose face scrunched into a scowl. Hunter walked by and smack his older friend on the back with a towel, "Don't be mean, Sumin hyung, Hyunwoo hyung said it happened so it must have happened," Hunter was definitely trying to back his friend up but somehow, it seemed like he wasn't. Hyunwoo couldn't help but scoff at his two friends, "Why does it seem like you guys think I'm crazy?" "Well," Junmin walked over and sat on a bench close to them, "It's not that we think you're crazy, but it kinda does feel like you're avoiding us and using this... Mysterious girl that no one has seen as an excuse," he shrugged. Jinsik came by with kettlebells and started doing his reps as he joined the conversation. "We're just worried about you, man. You usually keep to yourself, yes, but this is a whole other level. I mean, if she's real in the first place, how come you haven't found her in the past week?" he asked. In frustration, Hyunwoo groaned and threw his head back onto the padding of his station's seat, "I can't believe I'm even saying this," he then looked to the side, straight into Sumin's eyes and pointed at him, "Mystery girl is in the same English class as you."

The revelation surprised everyone but not Sumin who simply raised an eyebrow at him. "Really? She's in my class?" he scoffed and Hyunwoo nodded, "Well, did you see her last time you came by to get me after that class?" Now, that question made the others shut their gasps and exclamations of a surprise to see how Hyunwoo would react. The guy froze and his eyes darted around in slight panic, knowing full well that he didn't and that answer might come off as how his friends had insinuated before. "Uh..." Hyunwoo looked around his friends as his brain try its best to string enough words to make a sentence that makes sense. "Well..." he started out, getting more nervous even though he was only facing his friends and their stupid questions. It didn't help that all of them looked genuinely intrigued and were patiently waiting for him to say something, anything as soon as he could. Unfortunately, the pressure got to him and he didn't think twice before he stood up, surprising his friends, especially with his announcement before he ran off and out of the gym, "I think I need to run laps outside."

With that, Jinsik smacked Sumin upside the head, making the guy groan and clutch the side where he got the impact. "What was that for!?" Sumin huffed, trying to rub away the pain. Jinsik smirked teasingly at him and leaned down, "Maybe that ought to realign your crooked brain so you could think straight next time you speak," then he ran away before Sumin could reach down, grab a dumbell and throw it at him.

Hyunwoo didn't like this. He didn't like feeling negative things especially if he was doubting himself and when he felt like he was getting pissed at his friends. He knew full well that none of them meant to, none of them wanted to piss him off or make him feel bad about himself, even Sumin despite the way his words were articulated. But it just made him feel bad about himself, it made him feel stupid as if his wanting to find this mystery girl is a pointless crusade when it's not that serious. It's not like Hyunwoo is going around everywhere asking girls if they are the girl he has been looking for. For one thing, he's not the prince charming from Cinderella. And his introversion would cause his social battery to deplete after 2 interactions hence causing him to flop down on the floor like a fish out of water. He so badly needs his social battery to survive his classes and actually get grades above passing which is all dependent on class interactions. It also wasn't like he didn't want his friends' help, it was just embarrassing to admit that he has a crush on someone that he had only seen from afar. Especially admitting it to Sumin who had been nothing but nice and proactive, introducing him to different people only for him to be interested in someone Sumin hadn't introduced him to yet. Again, he was well aware that it was stupid but he couldn't help but feel like that, especially in a circumstance like this one. The circumstance is his existence as an introverted, awkward klutz.

It didn't occur to him that he had been running around the campus for a solid 20 minutes. The soft droplets of water were what snapped him out of his trance in the first place. Almost at once, more droplets of water fell from the sky, drenching his body and forcing him to run for cover. Through the thick curtain of rain, Hyunwoo could barely see anything, everything seemed blurry and the sound rendered him in a confused state as he couldn't seem to decide where to run for cover. In the midst of confusion and mess, Hyunwoo managed to slip on the slippery, muddy ground and skidded forward until his body collided with a tree. On the ground, looking up, Hyunwoo finally realized that he was actually under the cherry blossom tree where you slipped yourself over a week ago. "Are you serious?" he exhaled sharply as his eyes closed, feeling like the universe was making a mockery out of him by causing a seemingly calculated accident to further mock him of his incapabilities to find you or even to show him how you must've felt when this happened to you. Now Hyunwoo knows perfectly well what it felt to see petals scattering around you as if they wanted to mark where you landed just to make you feel even more embarrassed.

Hyunwoo was just about ready to have the ground open up and swallow him whole so he could spend an eternity muddling in his own stupidity and incapabilities. But when he failed to feel the rain on him anymore, he opened his eyes to see you crouching on top of him with your bottom lip between your teeth and his umbrella covering both of you from the rain. "Are you reenacting my accident, stranger?" you teased.

Reflexes kicking in, Hyunwoo tried to sit up quickly but ended up knocking his head with yours. Quite hard actually as it sent the both of you reeling slightly back. "Oh, God! I'm so sorry!" he panicked, forgetting about his pain momentarily to tend to you, he went as far as ignoring his own pain momentarily and even forgetting that he was an awkward klutz, surprising you when he grabbed your face gently to look at the spot that was starting to turn red from the rather harsh impact. You were blushing at this point because he was closer than you thought he would be especially considering that this was your second meeting. But he didn't seem to notice it as he was so focused on you, completely oblivious that he also had a red spot from the impact, shown from between strands of hair. Seeing this, you couldn't help but giggle at him, "Okay, damn, forget you reenacting my accident, you're just clumsy." Just the sound of you giggling was enough to make his heart skip a beat and his body freeze. He wanted to believe that it was the building anticipation that took over him and distracted him from functioning as a human being.

The sound of the rain reminded you that Hyunwoo was still drenched and that you were also at risk of getting wet. As much as you liked him holding your face, you grabbed his wrist gently which caused his eyes to shift to yours from your forehead, "We should move inside the building, we don't wanna catch a cold now, do we?" you teased. Luckily, Hyunwoo seemed to realize his position fairly quickly and stood up with you. He even took the umbrella from your hand which prompted you to take his hand instead as you led him inside the building.

Despite both of your seemingly confident and calculate moves, you both were blushing like lovestruck fools (because you both were), avoiding each other's gaze as your hearts beat out of your chests. The both of you tried to convince yourselves that it wasn't the nerves it wasn't the absolute nerve-wracking realization that you both had FINALLY found each other on a day that neither of you expected. Nope, definitely not. It was... something else completely unrelated.

Once you both got inside the building, you immediately led Hyunwoo into an empty classroom and sat him down somewhere he wouldn't feel the cold draft. Hyunwoo was just glad to see you, he was following your instruction and let you lead him, situating him wherever and however you want like a little puppy. Once he was perfectly situated, you carefully folded his umbrella after taking it from his hand and placing your bag on the seat next to him. "Okay, I think I can find some towels from the clinic office, are you fine by yourself here?" you asked, cringing slightly now that you were able to see how pitiful he looked. But despite his unfortunate-looking appearance, he was smiling brightly and nodding enthusiastically, "Yeah, I'll be fine! Don't worry," he reassured. Hearing that, you nodded and immediately dash to get the things that you needed to help him.

However, just as you were about to step out, your feet halted and you took a step back into the classroom. You turned slowly and looked at him, seemingly hesitant to leave him alone. You didn't want to be dramatic, and you really do believe that the mystery cutie you had just finally found again after so long (over a week) wouldn't just disappear on you. But still, you had JUST found him. You didn't want to leave his side.

Hyunwoo seemed to notice your hesitance. The way your eyes turned just a little sad and the way your hand gripped the door clued him into your hesitance easily. He thought it was adorable how you were acting to him, to someone you barely know. "I won't go anywhere, I'll wait for you, right here." he smiled gently at you, effectively reassuring you, allowing you to leave the room with a lighter heart and a slight spring to your step which didn't go unnoticed by Hyunwoo who chuckled and shook his head at you.

Even once your steps disappeared out in the hallway, Hyunwoo couldn't help but stare at the door with a smile still etched on his face. It took some time for him to tear his eyes away and when he finally managed to, he took notice of his umbrella that was on the desk, in front of your bag that was placed next to him. There was something on it that caught his eye. Upon closer inspection, he noticed something on the handle that looked like some kind of sticker or plastic. He took the item in his hands and pulled the handle out to see that it was a plastic wrapper, plastered just a little bit above the handle with a sellotape and the more he looked at it, the more he noticed that it looked like the wrapper of the candy he bought for someone just a couple days ago. He thought that you must've added it there yourself for some reason and while technically it was his umbrella, he wasn't mad that you put a little decoration on it. "What a weird coincidence," he chuckled.

"What's a weird coincidence?" he didn't even realize that you had returned to the room until he heard your voice. He simply waved the umbrella in his hands, "Oh no, I'm just looking at this thing in my umbrella." You quirked an eyebrow as you placed one towel on another empty desk and approached him with another one, "You like that?" you grinned while handing him a towel before pulling out a chair to sit in front of him, "Some guy bought me a lollipop candy with that wrapper a couple of days ago because I guess I looked pitiful enough that he felt sorry for me," you chuckled. When you looked up, you saw Hyunwoo staring at you with his mouth slightly agape, he had even stopped drying his hair with the towel you just handed. You took his expression as his negative reaction to hearing you talk to him about some other guy while he was simply right there like as if you were trying to show off how wanted you were. With eyes widened to saucers, you raised your hands and shook them in a panicked manner, "No, I wasn't bragging! I was just- well, I didn't even know the person! Could be a guy, could be a woman with a boyish haircut, who knows?" You honestly didn't even know why you panicked in front of him, it's not like whatever he could say or think of you would matter. He's a stranger. So why does it matter to you if he perceives you positively?

Luckily before you blabber even more, Hyunwoo shook his head which was enough to shut your mouth. "No, it's not about that, it's just... You're that person?" now you're confused. Your eyebrows knitted together and you waited for Hyunwoo to say something as additional info because that sentence made no sense yet. "I... I went to the convenience store just outside the campus dormitory with two of my friends," realizing where he was going, your eyes widened and you cut him off, "One who's a civil engineering major and another who's majoring in veterinary science." Hyunwoo's heart once again skipped a beat but he couldn't help but continue what he wanted to say, "And we... I saw someone sighing in front of the ramen so I..." Again, you cut him off, "Told the cashier to give me the smiley lollipop candy."

For a moment there, you both just stared at each other, grinning like two idiots for no reason. From what you thought was an apparent misfortune as a very cute guy saw you in such an unfortunate situation, turned out to be the craziest entanglement of fate ever. It was as if you both were meant to have so much near misses so you both could meet at exactly the right moment, the right time, and the right place. Underneath the cherry blossom tree that you first fell in love with when you were so close to hating yourself for the decision that you thought was so stupid just so he could give you a new perspective on things.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

It was unfortunate (yet highly predictable) that Hyunwoo caught the flu after meeting you. Of course, his friend blamed him for wandering around for two hours aimlessly before coming back to the dorm and changing out of his wet clothes. For obvious reasons, Hyunwoo didn't tell his friends that he had finally met you. Not yet at least. The both of you agreed that after a week of your friends poking fun at each of you, it's best that you both got to know each other first. So you both exchanged numbers and had been texting each other quite frequently ever since. Hyunwoo's flu forced him to be on bed rest for three days which means that your plans of hanging out after class fell through. But to be honest, he was rather grateful for the situation because you have been sending him food and care packages to the dorm without him even asking. To avoid his friends' detection, he would more often than not say that he ordered takeouts for himself or that his mom sent him a care package. The closest call was on the last day when you sent him homemade soup that he deemed was a takeout he ordered but when Junmin received the package, it had a cute kitty sticky note that said 'get well right meow!" with two hearts at the end. It was at that moment Hyunwoo realized that it was a good thing he was rather agile because he had never moved that quick to steal the package from his friend's hands.

So after his bed rest, he was back to full health and was way more ready to go to the campus than he had ever been. He didn't even let Sumin or Minjae style him that day because as per the information he found out on day two, you actually loved his hair as a floppy mop of hair and his rather soft boy aesthetic; pastel cardigans, light jeans, and converses. So even with Minjae and Sumin following after him with verbal protests (Sumin) and a series of boos (Minjae), Hyunwoo was able to coast clear out the door.

You were no better. While Hyunwoo didn't specify what look he liked best on you (because in all honesty, he likes how you look no matter the clothes or style you were wearing), you put an effort into your clothes that day which rather surprised your friends. They were gawking and asking questions because it was quite a drastic change. It wasn't like you changed into Elle Woods or Sharpay Evans out of the blue but it was obvious that you paid attention to what you were wearing that day.

Both your and Hyunwoo's friend groups were rather confused at your smiling faces and your constant attention to your phones. It wasn't unusual for you to be focused on your phone, but for you to giggle at it openly? They thought you had gone mad from looking for a mystery cutie. Little did they know, you were simply feeling your feelings for him, the mystery cutie you now know as Hyunwoo.

You were walking with your friends after your last class of the day, happy that not only you were finally able to meet up with Hyunwoo after waiting for quite a while but also because you both orchestrated a surprise for both of your friend groups.

"I'm really worried for you, you haven't stopped smiling all day!" Haewon said, trying to get you to stop walking so fast and to talk to her. But you shrugged her off gently, stopping at where you had promised to meet Hyunwoo, under the cherry blossom tree where you and he each got your taste of the universe's prank. "Haewon, guys, I swear I'm totally fine!" You pause to shrug your laptop back to a more secure position on your shoulder, "I'm not being weird, okay? I'm just... Happy, I guess? Giddy, maybe," you grinned and it didn't reassure them whatsoever. Before either one of them could say anything, you heard someone calling you from behind and when you turned around, you saw Sumin, Hyunwoo, and the people Hyunwoo had introduced to you (informally by showing pictures of them and telling you their names), Yujun, (the cutie you asked to sit with you that one time, Yechan, Minjae, and Jinsik. "Oh!" Sumin grinned, walking faster to you with his arm around Hyunwoo's shoulder, completely oblivious of Hyunwoo's knowing smile. "Hey, (y/n)! How have you been?" he asked, "Good, Sumin, I'm glad our paper hasn't killed you like you said it would," Yechan and Jinsik snickered at this while Yujun tilted his head to the side and his lips widened into a large grin, "Oh, you're the girl who helped me find a sat for lunch last week!" he exclaimed. At this revelation, Hyunwoo raised an eyebrow at you but you just casually (while trying your best to be lowkey) waved him off as a sign that you would tell him later. "By the way," Sumin stepped up, bringing Hyunwoo to focus much to your surprise, "(y/n) I'd like for you to meet my good friend-"

Your friends' and his' jaws dropped hard onto the ground when they saw you grinning widely and reaching a hand out to Hyunwoo's tuft of hair. "I see you decided to FINALLY let your mop down today," you teased which made Hyunwoo chuckle. "Yeah, I know you said you liked my hair like this and look," he stepped out of Sumin's hold (to which Sumin's hand just flopped uselessly next to his body) to spread his arms wide, showing off his look, "I'm wearing a cardigan too!" You have to admit that you couldn't help but bite your bottom lip at his adorable navy and light blue heart cardigan and Hyunwoo couldn't deny that seeing you look at him like that made his chest puff out with pride. Yujun and Yechan began clambering and reaching to clutch each other when they saw Hyunwoo reaching out to grab your laptop bag from your arm and offered his elbow to you. With a tilt of his head, Hyunwoo made a show to you (and his friends for good measure) when he said, "Shall we?" to which you gratefully accepted. Before you both took off, you turned around slightly and look at Hyunwoo's friends, "Told you his mystery girl was someone from Sumin's class." And Hyunwoo took a look at your friends with the most charming smile he could muster, "Aren't you glad the things that happened to (y/n) led her to this moment?"

As you both walked away, your friends and his began erupting into exclaims of disbelief and surprise but also relief. It was absolutely priceless and you would have definitely paid to see it in slow motion and to know exactly what they thought or said when it finally dawned upon them what had just happened. Overall, you both were just glad that things worked out in the end, everything worked out perfectly fine and oddly enough they all happened in one place.

Something told you that from that day forward, you both would love that stupid cherry blossom tree.

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[aimeedaisies]

The Princess Royal’s Official Engagements in October 2023

02/10 As President of the Riding for the Disabled Association visited Avon Riding Centre, to mark its 40th Anniversary. 🐴🥳

03/10 Held two Investiture ceremonies at Windsor Castle. 🎖️

With Sir Tim As Patron of the Minchinhampton Centre for the Elderly, visited Horsfall House, Minchinhampton. 👵🏻👴🏻

04/10 In Cornwall Princess Anne visited;

Origin Coffee in Porthleven. ☕️

Camborne School of Mines at the Penryn Campus of University of Exeter, in Penryn. 🔨

St Ewe Free Range Eggs Packing Centre in Truro. 🥚

05/10 As Colonel of The Blues and Royals (Royal Horse Guards and 1st Dragoons), attended a Household Cavalry Medal Parade at Powle Lines, Picton Barracks in Wiltshire. 🫡

07/10 With Sir Tim Attended the Scotland vs Ireland Rugby World Cup match at the Stade de France in Paris. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿🇮🇪🇫🇷🏉

09/10 As Patron of Livability, visited Livability Millie College in Poole. 🏫

As Patron of UK Youth, visited Avon Tyrrell Outdoor Activity Centre in Bransgore. 🧗‍♀️

10/10 Attended a Future of UK Food Systems Seminar held by Crops for the Future at the National Institute of Agricultural Botany in Cambridge. 🚜

As Commandant-in-Chief (Youth) of St. John Ambulance, opened the new Ambulance Hub in Castle Donington. 🚑

11/10 Held two investiture ceremonies at Windsor Castle. 🎖️

Unofficial, Sir Tim attended the opening of the New Zealand Liberation Museum, Te Arawhata, in Le Quesnoy, France. 🇫🇷🇳🇿

As Patron of Scots in London Group attended a Reception at St Columba’s Church of Scotland. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Attended a Blue Seal Club Dinner at the Cavalry and Guards Club in Piccadilly, London. 🤵‍♂️

12/10 As Patron of the Campaign for Gordonstoun, chaired a Cabinet Meeting at the Lansdowne Club, London. 🏫

As Patron of English Rural Housing Association, attended a Parish Council Rural Housing Conference at Eversholt Hall, Bedfordshire. 🏡

Visited the Aircraft Research Association in Bedford. ✈️

As Grand Master of the Royal Victorian Order, attended Evensong and a Reception at The King’s Chapel of the Savoy, London. 🎶

14/10 Sir Tim represented Princess Anne, Patron of the Wiltshire Horn Society, at a dinner on the occasion of their centenary. 🐑

15/10 As Member of the International Olympic Committee, and Chairman of the International Olympic Committee Members Election Commission, attended the first day of the 141st International Olympic Committee Session in Mumbai, India. 🇮🇳

16/10 As Member of the International Olympic Committee, and Chairman of the International Olympic Committee Members Election Commission, attended the second day of the 141st International Olympic Committee Session in Mumbai, India. 🇮🇳

Attended an IOC Reception at Jio World Centre. 🌏

17/10 As Member of the International Olympic Committee, and Chairman of the International Olympic Committee Members Election Commission, attended the third day of the 141st International Olympic Committee Session in Mumbai, India. 🇮🇳

Visited the Commonwealth War Graves Commission Bombay 1914-1918 Memorial at the Indian Sailors’ Home, in Mumbai. 🪖

Attended a reception at the residence of His Majesty’s Trade Commissioner for South Asia and Deputy High Commissioner for Western India in Mumbai. 🌏

Unofficial Sir Tim attended a memorial service for Lord Lawson (former Chancellor of the Exchequer) at St. Margaret’s church in Westminster ⛪️

19/10 Hosted a Reception with the King, Queen and the Duchess of Edinburgh at Buckingham Palace to thank those who contributed to and were involved with the State Funeral of The late Queen Elizabeth II and with the Coronation of Their Majesties. 🥂

With Sir Tim, As Colonel-in-Chief of the Royal Army Veterinary Corps attended the launch of the Corps History Book at the National Army Museum in London. 📚

With Sir Tim, As Patron of the Royal Navy and Royal Marines Charity, attended the Trafalgar Night Dinner at the Old Royal Naval College in Greenwich, London. 🤵‍♀️🤵‍♂️

20/10 Opened Cutbush and Corrall Charity almshouse accommodation in Maidstone.

Opened the Royal British Legion Industries Centenary Village, Greenwich House, in Aylesford, Kent.

As Patron of the Butler Trust, visited HM Prison Elmley.

24/10 Held an Investiture at Windsor Castle. 🎖️

As President of the English-Speaking Union of the Commonwealth, delivered the Evelyn Wrench Lecture at Dartmouth House in London. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

25/10 In Scotland Princess Anne visited;

The International Society for Optics and Photonics Photonex Exhibition at Scottish Event Campus in Glasgow. 🔍

As President of Victim Support Scotland, visited the National Office-West in Glasgow. 🫂

Peter Equi and Sons Limited Ice Cream Manufacturer. 🍦

26/10 Opened the National Honey Show at Sandown Park Racecourse in Esher, Surrey. 🍯 🐝

As Royal Patron of the Security Institute, this afternoon attended the Annual Conference at the Royal Society of Medicine in London. ⛓️

With Sir Tim As President of the Royal Yachting Association, attended a 50th Anniversary of the Yachtmaster Scheme Dinner at Trinity House, London. 🛥️🍽️

27/10 Held an Investiture at Buckingham Palace. 🎖️

31/10 In Scotland;

As Patron of the Moredun Foundation, attended a Conference at Moredun Research Institute, Pentlands Science Park, in Penicuik. 🧬

As Royal Patron of the Leuchie Forever Fund, attended a Reception to launch Leuchie House’s new strategy in Edinburgh. 🏡

As Chancellor of the University of Edinburgh, held a Chancellor’s Dinner at the Palace of Holyroodhouse. 👩‍🎓

Total official engagements for Anne in October: 47

2023 total so far: 400

Total official engagements accompanied by Tim in October: 6

2023 total so far: 81

[idyllcy]

I was your pinata, she was a star charter

Word count: 4.7k

Summary: The library boy... he's cute.

You rush into the library, tote bag in arms and book in hand. You aren't too excited to start school, but you suppose that studying at the library will help, somehow. The smell of paper and cloth covers fills your lungs as you step to the tables. The tears of the sun spill in through the stained glass windows, and you rub your arm gently. It's warm. The last drops of sun before the clouds cover his glory and destroy you. You wonder if a good cry will help you out.

You set a mug on the table and pry open your laptop. 

The words on your laptop drive you insane. The lines and lines of literature grasp your mind, forcing you to focus and read the phrases. Nothing goes through your mind like it's supposed to. You grow tired of the lines, head dizzy, and mind a mess over the assignment. You hated seminars. You don't like sitting and reading. You hate this. The crown of thorns tightens around your head, and you feel that familiar feeling of disgust crawl up your throat. 

How lovely.

"Um... hello?" A voice fans the clouds forming above your head. 

"Yes?"

"The library closes in five minutes," He smiles. 

You turn to face the boy, and you pause. 

He's gorgeous. Holy shit. You thought he'd look old because his hair was white, but the only thing going through your mind was over how angelic he looked. Your lips part as your eyes trail to his lips, and you swallow unconsciously. He's pretty. His green eyes are almost clear with how pale they are, and his skin is a deathly shade of peach, but he's so pretty. You're in love. Is that what love is? Oh. Great. You're in love with a random librarian working on campus.

WELL, WELL, YOU CAN'T BLAME YOURSELF!! HE'S GOT PRETTY CLOUDY HAIR AND THAT CLASSIC PINTEREST ACADEMIA OUTFIT!! HE'S JUST REALLY PRETTY!! HE LOOKS DAZZLING. HE HAS THOSE PRETTY GLASSES AND THE DAZZLING RUBY CHAIN HANGING FROM THE EDGE OF HIS GLASSES. HE LOOKS PRETTY, OKAY??? IT'S NOT JUST A YOU THING-

"Sorry," You snap out of your trance. Does he think you're weird for staring at him for that long? You hope he doesn't. "I'll pack up."

"Thank you," He smiles.

As he leaves, your eyes trail back to the document on your laptop. You got... a little work done. Barely anything. You sigh to yourself as you toss what needs to be discarded and shut your laptop. Well, at least you met someone cute. You hope he works here often.

The boy works here four days a week. He's here on three weekdays and Saturdays. He usually organizes books or sits at the front desk, checking books in and out. His coffee order is an oat milk latte, and he drinks more tea than coffee. He has never once shown up without his glasses or knitted vest. It's just his style of clothing, you suppose. Nothing bad. You liked how he looked. It offered some semblance of chaos in a library that was prim and proper. You like it. It reminds you of the clouds.

The sun burns into your skin as you walk toward the library.

It's become a spot where you hang out often. You sit there and do your homework, biting and chewing on your lip as you read through more files than you can digest. Your stomach churns with disdain as you scribble onto your tablet. You want to leave. Please. You miss frolicking in the fields and living like a protagonist. You aren't the lead of the story now. You're just a character in the background to support others' growth. You trip and tumble over pebbles and boulders until the main characters end up together, leaving you in the background.

You don't know if you like that role too much.

Yet, as you set your tea down and pull out your laptop, you wonder when the cycle will break. You don't possess beauty as Psyche does. You hold no wrath of the gods for being beautiful beyond what Venus could ever imagine. You prayed that somehow, someday, you could be as beautiful as the princess herself. Perhaps the arrow of love would graze someone on accident, and you would finally live to be the center of attention. 

Though, all of that was just pointless daydreaming.

You finish the last of your tea, checking two things off your to-do list, three more. Three more, and then you could rest for the night. The sun is starting to set, the hairs on your neck straightening from it. The light from the sun places itself on your skin, burning down your back as you finish another two assignments.

Before your final one, you turn to the side to stare at the pretty librarian. You lean on the palm of your hand, watching the way the sun coated his back in gold. The chains on his glasses look gold under the star, and you take note of how prim his fingernails were. He didn't bite them, and his hands looked elegant compared to the ones you were used to. Even your own nails are damaged because of how you used to bite them. The skin on your nails struggles to grow back because you still pick at them.

You grow nervous too often. You can't help it. 

You turn your eyes to your laptop screen, fingers clicking on the keyboard.

The sun sets with the moon's chasing, and you close your laptop once you finish your final assignment. You tilt your neck to stretch it, your bones cracking as you do. The glass cup is empty of the latte you got earlier from the local coffee shop. You slip everything into your bag and wrap your arms around it, pulling out a stuffed animal to rest your head on. You don't feel like going back to your dorm. 

You close your eyes, resting your head on the cushion. A quick nap couldn't kill you.

"Hey, time to wake up."

Your lashes flutter, and you sit up slowly. Your muscles ache. You don't like the sleeping position you were just in. Yes, you started drooling because it was a DAMN good nap, but your back is not having any fun at all. That was not a good nap for your body. You're going to need to stretch when you get home. You crane your neck in an attempt to soothe your muscles. It's not working.

You lean back, locking eyes with the male.

"A-ah!" You jump in your seat. "Is the library already closed? I'm so sorry!"

The male jumps back at your sudden movement, and you shove the stuffie into your bag. You probably pissed him off. Oh, no. You don't know if you want that. What if he kicks you out permanently because you hindered closing time? That wouldn't be good. Then, you wouldn't be able to come back and stare at the cute librarian ever again.

"I'm so sorry!" You bow ninety degrees to the boy, and the male looks taken aback. 

"No, no!" The boy stutters, waving his hand. "Don't worry about it! You seemed tired, so I thought it'd be better to have you leave last. You still have two minutes."

"I'm so sorry again!" You grab your stuff, heart racing as you rush out of the library. Ah. How embarrassing. You hope he doesn't think badly of you after that. You can't believe you almost slept until closing.

You check your phone.

Huh? Closing was ten minutes ago. Are the clocks inside the library broken?

The gates of summer make way for the guards of fall, the burning rays of sun replaced with falling foliage. The steps to the library are covered in orange and brown, the latte in your hand replaced with a cup of diluted earl grey tea. You don't know why you're trying it. Maybe it's because you saw the cute library try out the tea the other day. You're at least glad that you added milk and sugar. Hopefully, it keeps you awake like your caffeine did.

Your lips part at the sight of the cute library boy jumping into a pile of leaves. Your cheeks grow warm, and you gasp. He's... jumping into leaves? You watch the leaves flutter around him, and time seems to slow as you watch him. He's pretty. Though his hair is in his face as he's hidden behind the pile of leaves, he's pretty. A giggle slips past your lips unconsciously, and you slap a hand over your mouth. Shit.

You rush into the library, praying that he didn't see you laugh at him. Embarrassment burns at your neck as you sit down at your usual spot. He's cute. Even if you couldn't see his face clearly, he was pretty. Your neck grows warm as you recall the scene, and you take a sip of your drink to calm down. You have assignments to do. You don't know if you could survive if he had seen you.

You don't actually recall what the librarian looks like. You remember staring in awe at his beauty before rushing off because it was closing time. You wonder if his hair is actually soft to the touch. Maybe... you'd ask him one day? Maybe you should get his name first.

The cloud covers the sun as you reach into your bag for the textbook. You hate the stupid course. Why couldn't they have been kind like the other professors and used a book that's available online? Oh, were you not supposed to say that? Oops. Oh well. Not like you're the only one. You don't know how many of your other classmates are doing things their parents would kill them over.

You chew on your bottom lip as you submit another assignment. 

The sun is long gone at this point, and you wonder if you should actually make use of the free time you have left. You want to stalk the cute librarian. You wonder if you could ask him for book recommendations. Maybe he'd give you one that you actually like. 

You grab your bag, tucking everything in. You'll check out a book before you leave. You're craving murder. You'll read about that.

"Ah, sorry," You step to the counter. "I was wondering, since you're the librarian, if you had any book recommendations? I wanted to read something like murder mystery."

"Well," You tilt your head at his cough. "I'd recommend Conan Doyle or Agatha Christie. Have you read And then there were none?"

"Ah, no," You tap your chin. "Which area is that book in?"

"I'll go with you," the male smiles.

"Thank you..." You pause to squint at his nametag. 

"Nagito Komaeda." He starts walking. "Please call me Nagito."

"Thank you, Nagito," You trail along behind him, and your internal monologue goes wild. He looks so pretty. His back is so pretty. Oh, god. You sound like a pervert right now. You're going to go insane. Your neck is warm, and you nearly crash into him as he stops. Your heart jumped into your throat from that. You didn't need him to kill you before you even got to know him.

You stop behind Komaeda as he reaches for your book, and you stare at the way his arms reached up. He's got little to no muscle. He's incredibly thin. You think he looks a little healthier compared to when you first met him, but you suppose he might just be like that. It wasn't like you hadn't put on weight since starting college. You should've paid attention when your teacher talked about the freshmen 15.

Komaeda grabs the book while you're lost in thought and you don't even notice how close you are to him. You flinch as he turns around.

"Sorry!" He gasps.

"No, no!" You wave your hands in a panic. "I'm sorry for being so close! I was looking at the other book."

You pull out a romance book from the shelf, and Komaeda flushes. You don't even notice that it's a romance book. 

"Are you more into romance?"

"I like both," You look to the side, spotting another book. "Ah, speaking of which. Have you read Growing Pains? I heard it's really good."

"I have," He smiles. "It's a really good book. Have you?"

"No," You shake your head. "Shall I read it?"

"Yes," Komaeda grabs for it, sliding the book on top of the stack in his arms. "How about It's a soulmate thing? You're holding I'm here, so I assumed you might-"

"Yes, please," Your eyes sparkle at the sight of the cover. "I'm a sucker for soulmate stories."

"I'm glad," He reaches for another book. "and... Seashells and Sketchbooks?"

"Mermaids!" You gasp. "Sorry, I've read that one. I loved it."

"It's good, isn't it? I love it too." He smiles. 

"What's your favorite?" You stare up at him, batting your lashes.

"Growing Pains," He mumbles, looking to the side. "It took my heart and crushed it in the best way possible. I can't get over the ending. You?"

"Hands down, it's Sketchbook and Seashells," You mumble. "I'm here is a close second. Both of them were so gentle and fluffy. I was living in a cloud while reading both of them."

"I'm willing to bet that you'll like Growing Pains more once you finish the book." He looks you in the eye, and you fight the urge to shrink under his eyes. "Hm?"

"Sure," You smile. "What does the winner get?"

"We'll decide after you read the book," Komaeda takes the book from your hands.

You're on autopilot until you return to your dorm. He's so pretty. Komaeda is so dazzling. Your heart is racing a million beats a minute as he checked out your books for you. You can't stare him in the eyes. He's just too pretty. His hands are so nicely kept, and you recall the way his pale eyes had stared into your soul. You would cherish the book. You can't believe you're doing this. Your heart is racing from a boy you barely remember the face of.

You flip through the pages, jaw dropped and heart cracking. There was no comfort in this book. It was completely angst. You don't know what you're doing, yet you can't stop reading. You've cried through a box of tissues already, and your assignments are stacking up, but your heart is crying in agony. It's been 11 chapters. Your mind is breaking as you do. You don't know if a gallon of ice cream is going to cure you of the childhood trauma the two experienced. Curse slow burns. You're going mental over this.

You emerge from your room four days later with fish eyes and a broken and poorly mended heart. The ending was cute, but your heart is not. Neither is how you look. There's no way you can return to the library with a stuffy nose and puffy eyes. You'll take another two days before going back. Komaeda was right. It is your favorite book now. 

You hate him.

You toss the tissues and the trash, splashing water on your face. You still need to read the other two books. You're praying both of them are nice and fluffy.

They are.

You're saved. You're safe. You're cheering so hard right now. Your heart is saved. 

You slam the books on the counter, dark circles present. You don't know how many days you haven't been to the library, but you're just about ready to beat someone up. "You. I'm going to strangle alive."

Komaeda hums, taking the books from your hand.

"I take it that I won the bet, then?" He scans the books back in.

"Yes." You sigh. "You won, but I want you to read Lonely Kids."

"Sure," Komaeda smiles. "So, since I won, I want you to read another handful of books."

"Oh?" You tilt your head.

"Read Stay With Me, Hold my Hand," He smiles. "It's a series."

"Alright." You mumble. "I'll scalp you if it makes me cry."

"It might," He pauses. "It's by the same author as Growing Pains."

"I'm going to cry, then," You grimace. "It's so beautifully destructive. I love the way they write. The whole world is built around you so beautifully only for it to be torn into shreds."

"Yeah," Komaeda smiles. "Though, this one will make you cry harder."

"I'll read it over break," You sigh. "Thank you, by the way. And Then There Were None was a really good story."

"I'm glad." You pull your bag, and you head off. 

You won't tell him that Lonely Kids is a smut book. He can read between the lines by himself. You hope he at least likes it. You're a whore for that author's books. He could throw a book into your stomach and make you throw up blood and you'd still cry over it. That was how much you liked that author. But you suppose that he wouldn't do that to you. You don't know. You cried over "Communication is Key". You don't know how much you can take from that author. One of these days you're going to throw up over a book from how hard you cry.

You don't know if you want to read any more of Komaeda's favorite author. Your heart hurts from Growing Pains enough.

You check your phone, and you stand in line at the coffee shop. What was the librarian's coffee order again? You swear it was... something... you don't remember. No, wait. You do. He's been bringing the woody tea lately. You learned that the other day in class. Patchouli? The... plant. That might be best. Even if he doesn't like it, it doesn't taste bitter to the tongue. You wonder if he'll mind the spice.

"One Patchouli tea and one milk tea please," You smile.

"What kind of tea for the milk?"

"Earl grey," You hum. "Fifty sugar for the milk tea, and twenty five sugar for the regular tea."

You stand on the side, rocking on your feet. You hope he likes it.

He does. 

You watch him grow visibly brighter at the sight of the tea, and you relax under your breath. He likes it. He likes the tea. You'll keep that in mind next time. He looks really happy at the sight of tea, and you can't help yourself. "Uh, do you like tea?" You mentally wince at how awkward that sounded.

"Yes!" Komaeda clasps his hands together, and you mentally cheer. "I have a preference for tea that isn't bitter. I can't taste many things because of my medication, you see."

"Medication?" You tilt your head. He's sick?

"I'm being treated for a couple illnesses." He hums. "Sorry."

"No! Don't be!" You gasp, horror setting in. Did you just make him feel bad? You hope not. "I wish you a speedy recovery. Please take care of yourself."

"Of course," He smiles at you, and you wonder if he's sad. His hair is still in the way of his face. You're starting to get impatient. You want to see how he looks. You're going to kill someone at this rate. Why was it so hard to see someone's face??? 

The leaves on the trees empty out quickly, and you find yourself holed in the library more and more. Your midterms are coming up. You're going to stab yourself. Why couldn't they have just assigned you a research paper? That would've been so much nicer. Ugh.

Someone taps your shoulder gently. "Would you like some help? I took that class already."

"Yes, please?" You stare up at Komaeda with doe eyes. "I'm losing my mind over the subject."

"Does giving you the test and correct answers count as helping?"

"Yeah," You stare up at him, chin tilted to the ceiling. You take note of his lashes. Holy shit he has nice lashes. "Do you have it?"

He does. He hands you his laptop, and he shares a google file with you. It's a blessing. An angel has been sent to you from above. Cupid himself is blessing this marriage. This is a blessing in disguise. Maybe you are Psyche in a different way. Maybe you're actually the main character for once. Even if you aren't, you're happy with what you have currently. 

You work on your laptop with Komaeda, the boy making small talk with you. He has a nice voice. His voice is airy, and it soothes you. It does more than your tea for some reason. You're a little sleepy from his voice. You wonder how well you'd sleep if you were to sleep with him. Ah, how foolish of you. Those thoughts are fleeting, and you close your laptop as you finish checking it out. You hope he doesn't get offended if you nap while he sits next to you. You need rest. You haven't slept properly in days.

You don't remember much of the conversation, but you know that you're going to nap well.

"Thank you..." You mumble. "I owe you."

You don't hear his answer.

You do, however, wake up to him shaking you.

"Closing time," He smiles. "We're the last ones."

"Alright," You mumble, rubbing your eyes. "Thank you. It was very warm."

"Of course," You follow Komaeda as he takes the trash.

The stars sparkle above your eyes, and you exhale. Hopefully your midterms will go well.

Psyche never knew the face of her husband. She had been told that it was a beast, something that was beyond what a human could handle. She had been sold because she was worshipped, yet her husband was gentle without a single candle. Whenever she wanted to see him, he would not let her. She was told to never see his face. Yet, love presents itself in its best form for everyone. You want to see Komaeda's face properly; Even if he runs.

The book in your hands breaks your heart over and over again, an endless cycle of death. You wonder if that's what it felt like. You want to curl up in the book and never touch anything else. You want to wrap your arms around the characters and assure them that there's nothing ahead, well aware that what lies ahead is only heartbreak. It hurts to watch people in a world beyond yours crumble because of the laws of fate. It hurts you. 

You finish the book, heart torn from your chest, tears threatening to ruin the book. It hurts. It hurts to watch people love in an apocalypse be torn apart and destroyed. It burns your throat. You don't like it. You want to break into the author's home and cry on the floor and ruin their carpets. What an awful person you are.

You go to the library again once you've finished the trilogy. It was good. You wonder if Komaeda would be willing to sit down and talk about it with you. You had a couple of questions for him.

Your heart is going a million miles an hour right now. You can't believe you did it. You asked Komaeda to coffee. Would it be too much of a rush to ask him out today? Would it kill him? Maybe it would. You might have a harder time asking him out today. Maybe just one coffee date at a time.

One turns to two.

Two turns into four.

Four turns into an indefinite number. 

You like spending time with Komaeda. He calms you down visibly, and your heart grows softer as time passes. Maybe you got used to how loud it was. You think you learned that somewhere. Sensory adaptation, was it? You don't know. You just know you're embarrassed beyond belief and in love with him horribly. 

Ah. 

You like him.

You like him as the wind finally pushes his hair back and as he goes embarrassed from your staring. 

You like him as he brushes his hands on yours as the two of you sit down to drink the coffee.

You like him as he's chasing you in a field of flowers that the botanist majors care for so much.

You like Nagito Komaeda like a girl has a crush on her senior; and you're terrified. because while in the millions of stories you lost yourself in they get the boy, not many in reality do. You're terrified of losing what you have currently. There's just something that's drowning you alive. 

It's like stepping into quicksand, sinking as you struggle against it more. You thrash desperately against your own feelings, waiting until it consumes you until there's nothing more. You want to give yourself to him wholeheartedly, yet you don't. Cupid's arrows have never hit you, so you wouldn't know. You hadn't even remembered what Komaeda looked like until the wind blew his hair out of the way. There's no way he likes you back.

Yet, as Komaeda's cheeks grow red from your ministrations, you think you have a fair chance.

"Nagito," You breathe, staring at the male.

"What?" He stares at you. 

"I like you."

Komaeda goes silent, and for a moment, you worry that you've offended him.

Your mind spirals as you sit there in silence. It's... confusing. Did he not like you? Why was he taking so long to respond to you? Maybe it hurt to answer? Maybe it was strange? You fiddle with your fingers as he processes the words. You want to step away, yet you want to hear an answer from his lips. Would he answer you?

One minute turns to two. Two minutes turns to four. Four minutes turn to five. 

Maybe he wouldn't answer you. You should probably take a step to the side and let him process it for a couple of days.

You open your mouth, your throat dry. You want to say something. Could you? Was that an option? Your heart is fighting to break free from your chest. You're dying to do something. Can you... tell him? Was that an option? You can let him reject you. You'll mull over the rejection just fine. It's not like you're expecting him to say yes to you. You'll just sit down and cry over it later.

"Say it again," Komaeda grabs your shoulders, cheeks flushed. " Please. Say it again."

"I... like you," You mumble, looking to the side, a sudden embarrassment on you. "I like you a lot."

A silence is thrown over the two of you, and you brace yourself for rejection.

Komaeda's hands shake as he presses them to your cheeks, tilting your face to face him. You stare at him, your heart ringing in your ears. Your cheeks are warm, and his hands are practically vibrating. You're scared. Is he going to reject you face to face? Is he going to reject you while looking into your eyes? Oh, how cruel he was. You look back to the side.

"Look at... me," Komaeda's voice is shaking too.

You open one eye to stare at him.

"I like you too," He whimpers. "I like you a lot too. I'm infatuated with you. It was as though Cupid had grazed my skin with an arrow the first time we met. I adore you to pieces. I can't... I can't think of living without you."

Now it's your turn to get embarrassed. Pupils blown wide with excitement.

"You like me too?" You grab his wrists. "You do? Oh, tell me you do."

"I do," Komaeda swallows slowly, and you hear your pulse in your ears. "I do adore you so much, darling."

And you cry. Silent tears that trickle down your cheeks. You cry the tears of the stars, twinkling and burning your heart as your confession is accepted. You sob silently, hand over your mouth and tears trickling down your cheeks. You're ecstatic. You're... loved. You aren't in the background anymore. You're finally someone who isn't used as a staircase for others. Hopefully Komaeda stays with you.

Komaeda pulls you into his chest, running his hands through your hair.

Maybe you could stay there forever, even if you were a background character.

[tozettastone]

Number 5 with Genjutsu Master/Her Beautiful Hair please !

For #5: "College AU in which exactly none of the characters are undergraduate students at this college. Character A and Character B are coming up with a list of ways that they could fund their research that isn't the competitive grants process. They've settled on organised crime. "

---

She drummed her fingernails on the bench as the cute barista made her coffee.

She didn't have a name, but today the body she'd borrowed was called Chikako. She was a uniformed young lady with subtle makeup and a girlish pout. She was a civilian—a meter reader employed by a utility company by day, and a student by night—and about twenty years younger than the nameless ninja currently borrowing her form.

The real Chikako was across the other side of the city right now, occupied by her actual day job. The one getting her coffee just needed to borrow her student ID and face for a bit. And her credit card, obviously, as it was right there in her wallet next to her ID.

The coffee wasn't great, but she'd anticipated that and gotten three pumps of artificially flavoured syrup in it, which, combined with the milk, disguised a multitude of sins. Today Chikako was not here to stalk anyone or steal anything (although she'd probably steal something anyway. She was only human, after all!) but, rather embarrassingly, to sit in on a seminar introducing researchers to the whole system of competitive grants by which public research lived and died.

Chikako was pretty familiar with the actual research process. Sure, she'd never attended a university or even a regular school herself, but she'd been introduced to field research by way of the gruelling discipline of the shinobi intel machine. She'd been spying on people for fun and profit since she could walk. Her biggest hurdles hadn't been the field work, but rather the experimental design and treatment of her data.

What she really wanted to find out today was if it would be better to apply to one of these big old universities and do her field research through them. There were advantages, she knew: you never had to break into a print shop and create copies of your own publications, and you got invited to conferences rather than having to steal someone's identity and crash, and you got to actually present your own research to other people and talk about it! All of this was very exciting to her.

There were also downsides: people knew who you were, you had to talk to them all the time using the same face and anyone who got mad at you usually knew exactly where to find you. Less exciting. But potentially still workable... especially since there was no reason to expect she would enroll under her own identity.

She slipped soundlessly into the lecture hall. It seated a hundred but it was sparsely populated by ragged looking people, mostly in their mid to late twenties, each more sartorially challenged than the last. As Chikako, she felt she stood out almost uncomfortably simply for being unwrinkled, colour coordinated and awake. She sat down in one of the faded chairs and did not swing the battered wooden slab that was meant to serve as a desk out over her lap. Instead she clutched her sickly sweet coffee and waited for the professor to show up and let them know all about the exciting world of applying for a competitive grant.

This was really what would decide her, she figured. If it was easy money that could support her in fieldwork, she'd swap careers in an instant.

Chikako was well adjusted to the lifestyle, but being a missing-nin was hard, dangerous work. It meant never having a proper home base to stay at, taking dangerous jobs that paid worse than they did at a traditional ninja village, and just... living very precariously. She lived both worse and better than most: she ghosted into accommodation without anyone the wiser, lifted her petty cash from oblivious civilians, and when she did do real shinobi work, her skillset meant she was often doing glorified PI work, enabling blackmail, rooting out embezzling and preparing evidence for the scandals and divorces of the rich and famous.

But she also had to take time out from her research any time she wanted to make any honest money. And that had led her to thinking: didn't people get paid for research? Like, legitimately? And how did they do that?

So now she was here, listening to the ancient and hunched professor wearily explain that a competitive grant application was essentially an instrument of intellectual torture. He was currently halfway through detailing that, for example, you would need to know which conferences you needed to present at and what the travel costs would be three years in advance to prepare your budget for assessment, and then if you were one of the 18% of successful applicants, you would probably be given four fifths of the money you actually needed.

"...after a while you will learn how to tailor your application so your project can be effectively cut down without losing significant value. You can't inflate your costs though, because they won't approve it if you do that."

Someone raised a hand.

"Ah... you," the professor pointed one aged, shaking hand. "Yes."

"What if you, um, like, learn something new? And your project doesn't go how you expect? And the costs... well, you know, change?"

"Heh," said the old professor. "Heh heh heh. The grants committee is not set up to accommodate that. Any costs that exceed—"

"Sorry, forgive my interruption, sir, but the grants committee isn't set up go accommodate research leading to new information?"

"That's correct," he said serenely. "Any costs that exceed your predictions need to come out of central university funds. You will need to explain your needs to your departmental representative." He looked around at their faces. Chikako's was sceptical but she was hardly alone in that. "You get the knack for it eventually," he assured them.

Hmm. You know, she was nearly fifty, and had gotten the knack for many things in her time. But she didn't feel that getting the knack for this was going to be the solution to her problem.

She finished her coffee and draped a secondary genjutsu over herself so nobody would notice her getting up to leave. There was no point being rude to the poor old professor, after all.

Chikako's money was burning a hole in her pocket, so she strolled around the campus, inspecting this and that. It was almost like a little town all on its own, really. The students who could afford university had plenty of family money, even if it seemed like their careers paid shit all more generally, so there were stores and stalls and amenities aplenty, including what seemed to be several charitable organisations recruiting volunteers on campus.

She ghosted through it all, finding little of value to her personally, and fetched up at the library instead. There, she maxed out Chikako's library account by borrowing twelve books to read instead, all with titles like "Shinobi, Crime and the Black Economy," or "Labelling Perspective: The Meaning of 'Missing' Nin."

Once she was off campus, she let her illusions fall in an alley between two residential houses, turning from the twenty-something, dark eyed, dark haired, fresh-faced willowy little Chikako back into her actual, real, flesh and blood self: a flawlessly made up woman who might have been any age between thirty and forty five, with a missing-nin's forehead protector and a wild tumble of red curls.

She pulled the forehead protector off and shoved it in her pocket before she handed Chikako's "lost" wallet in at the nearest police station.

"It was just outside the university campus," she reported, leaning on the bench in the station. "I have no idea how long it's been there."

"Okay, thanks for your report, Miss... We'll make sure she gets it back."

"I'm so glad," she said earnestly. "I know I'd feel just awful if I lost my wallet."

"Well, you did the right thing. Have a good day, Miss."

That was her. Doer of right things. Always.

It was the off season for tourists, so after check-in hours had passed, she simply wandered through a luxury hotel and selected one of the unused honeymoon suites to break into. The bed was huge, with a feather-soft mattress and a multitude of pillows, but enormous bath was the real prize for her.

Fancy hotels like this had all sorts of sample products, and she did love bubbles. Naked and unselfconscious, she peered at herself in the mirror for a while, inspecting her face. It was a lovely face, framed perfectly by her pretty crimson curls. A little angular and aggressive for the tastes of the day, with her high cheekbones and sharp jaw. But beautiful, which was the important thing. If she had nothing else—and she usually had nothing else—she still had her looks.

As the bubble bath filled up, the mirror fogged over, until her face was an indistinct blur with a smear of hard candy red where her mouth was. She turned away from her reflection and slipped into the bath with a full body shiver at the water's blissful heat.

She had her pile of books to read, but with a deep sigh, she supposed it would be best to start thinking about how she was going to fund her next research project instead.

Not by way of the competitive grants process, obviously.

Credit card fraud was a short term solution, useful for buying little treats or paying for a night in the odd hotel when one really wanted room service; it wasn't a lifestyle. Hard currency—cash—was probably the optimal way to go. It was tricky to trace, accepted everywhere and couldn't be tied to anyone's identity if it was wisely spent.

She sighed deeply and dunked her head under the water. Tomorrow she'd just have to quietly rob a bank on her way out of town.

[strangersatellites]

reading and replying to comments on my own fics isn’t enough. i want to have a high school-style socratic seminar where we all sit in a circle and discuss themes and symbolism and characterization while i listen and watch over omnipotently with a warm cup of coffee and a pair of funky reading glasses sliding down my nose.