#saw people losing their minds over a WHOLE NEW CAST THEY ANNOUNCED AND I WAS LIKE THIS SHOW???? ISNT DEAD YET ???

[thel0v3hashira143]

❝ 𝐉𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔 ❞

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ a husband you never met and a runaway bride. what could go wrong? prince!suguru x princess!reader au

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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ warnings: fem!black coded!reader but anyone can read, flufff and a lil angst, povs are lowk all over the place, aranged marriage trope, i totally thought of charlotte's dress from princess and the frog for reader, def not inspired by that queen charlotte scene, reader isn't like other girls, suguru just gives off such prince energy ahhhh :3

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ notes: my first fic omgg!! this was the poll winner from the other day and i will be releasing the others soon! as always reqs are open ♡ stay hot!! 🎀💕

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ 3.6k words, 20.4k characters

There were whispers in the Geto castle.

The news of Prince Suguru's betrothal, whispered in the hallowed halls of the castle, reaching everyone's ears like a chilling wind. Geto was used to the stares and hushed whispers, due to being the prince of the most successful kingdom in the land...but this was different.

He stood silently looking down at his kingdom, the vast sky, resembling an infinite canvas, adorned with shades of blue, purple, and gold, filtered through the window which cast a golden shadow over his features.

It was as if the gods smiled down on the land, offering love and tenderness throughout the whole kingdom which was preparing for a celebration. As the sun tickled his skin a conflicted look cast over his features, and his eyes, usually sharp and calculating, flitted around as he looked down at his people. His fingers traced the intricate patterns on the parchment, reading it over and over in hopes it would finally sink in.

Ever since the elders announced he was to be betrothed they seemed more over joyed than he was, finally finding a wife for him to wed and strengthen the kingdom. He had initially dismissed it as insignificant, firmly believing he would discover a solution, a way out, but now he found himself here. On the day he was to be married.

The kingdom was adorned in colorful decorations from head to toe, and Suguru almost felt guilty but he saw all the effort being put in for his wedding were not in vain. Every decoration was clearly placed with care; to celebrate the union of their prince and this mystery woman. Nevertheless, even with the stunning scenery around him, he couldn't shake the desire for it all to be over.

"Yo! Suguru!" A large hand clasped on his shoulder which pulled him out of his thoughts as Satoru's blindfold and snow white hair came into view. The tall man had a nervous grin and his face and he reached up to scratch the back of his head suspiciously, as Suguru looked up at him incredulously.

"Ah, Satoru. What's wrong?" Something was clearly going on, as Gojo wore his emotions on his sleeve. Before he could even get a chance to answer, all of the worst case scenarios were running through Suguru's head. He already felt a headache incoming.

"Oh, it's nothing...just your future wifey!" Suguru's eyebrows furrowed at his words as Satoru cringed slightly, knowing that wasn't even the whole of the news. After a awkward pause Suguru patiently asked, "Yes?" urging Satoru to continue while trying to contain his frustration.

Satoru let out a laugh and threw his arm over Suguru as the later let out a sigh and pushed him off. "Oh trust me, you're gonna laugh! We're all gonna look back on this an-" "Spill it, Satoru."

The white haired male tensed up as a bead of sweat formed on his brow. "...I may have...lost...her?"

Another awkward silence filled the room as the handsome prince's features contorted into one of disbelief. How do you lose a grown adult? This was new low for Satoru.

His first instinct was to look for her. After all, Satoru wasn't the most thorough when it came to these things. Perhaps she left her room only for a moment to speak to a maid, or maybe she wasn't spotted in her room...right? As much as he tried to distract himself his mind wandered to a worse outcome. Abduction or an assassination attempt. But what if she was just like him? Hesitant and perhaps she got cold feet? If she had spoken to the elders like they had him, there's no doubt they intimidated her.

The raven haired prince let out a sigh and ran a hand over his face as he began calculating all possible strategies to find her before the ceremony. He turned to Satoru who let out a sigh of relief at his words. "Alert our best trackers. We need to devise a plan to cover all the areas she might have gone."

Satoru nodded and both men began to stride out of the room. As he made his way into the long, winding hallways of his castle, the words of the elders rang in his mind.

You will learn to love her.

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1 DAY PRIOR

You were certain your life was ending.

You sat on the edge of your bed as you dramatically leaned against the post of your bed, eyed wide and face blank despite the whirlwinds of emotions inside you. Dozens of servants scurried around your room, packing trunk after trunk for your move. To your new home.

You flopped back on the bed with a 'omph' as the mindless chatter of the maids sounded like static in your ears. The gauzy silks and beautiful furniture of your childhood room began to close in on you, the weight of tradition and duty bearing down on your fragile shoulders. The room, once a sanctuary of comfort, now felt like a confining fortress.

Your trembling fingers traced the intricate patterns of a silver necklace, a cherished token your mother gave to you as a child. The impending marriage felt like the beginning of the end of all of your freedom. You would hardly ever see your beautiful gardens, your castle, or your parents ever again.

Despite this, everyone except you seemed to be convinced this was the best thing that could've ever happened to you. You remembered the elders words as you rolled you eyes.

This is a great honor for your family. You were chosen, out of all the kingdoms, out of all the princesses in the land, to marry the eldest son of the Shibuya kingdom.

Just as you let out a defeated sigh, a gentle knock on the chamber door disrupted you thoughts, and your mother came into view and your heart sunk. As she approached your bed she ushered all the maids out of the room before striding over to you gracefully. You sat up and sent her a glare through the corner of your eye.

"[name]. What's troubling you my daughter?", she said gently as she sat beside you. You whipped your head around with bated breath. "Mother," You began hesitantly. After one word, it was as if all your confidence was knocked out of you and your gaze was now fixed on the intricate patterns of the carpet.

"I...I don't want to marry Suguru Geto. I fear what life awaits me if I am bound to him. Besides, what if I don't love him? What if we are not compatible like the elders say?"

Your mother sighed, her eyes filled with a sense of understanding. "My dear, the union with Suguru is not solely about personal desires and it has nothing to do with love. Think of the kingdom, and our people. Arranged marriages have been a longstanding tradition that have proven to be good for us. Just look at your father and I, who also had an arranged marriage and have found joy in each other's company."

You let out a small scoff and you turn your head away from your mother. She just didn't understand...None of them did. Sensing your frustration your mother smoothed out her skirts before standing with a small exhale. "You'll depart later tonight and arrive in the morning, just in time for the ceremony." You didn't respond and a pregnant pause fell over the room. Just as your mother was about to depart she looked back at you sadly as she held the door open. "Give Suguru a chance. You will learn to love him my dear." She said softly before closing the large door with a soft click.

Now you were truly all alone, in your large room with near maddening silence. "Give him a chance...yeah right." you muttered to yourself with a furrowed brow. You made your way to the balcony and gazed down upon your kingdom as your mind wandered to your unknown prince.

Was he kind? Handsome? Cruel? Stupid? Ugly?

A breeze swept through, lifting the tendrils your hair. With every passing moment, you fell deeper and deeper within your pit of despair. You couldn't resign to a life dictated by others.

It just wasn't you.

The union, this man, this wedding felt like a betrayal of your essence. As tears welled up in your eyes, your decision became clear. It was daunting, yes, but who would want to be bound to a destiny they didn't choose? As you picked up your gown with new determination, your mind was made.

You were going to flee the wedding.

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Suguru was just about fed up.

It had been nearly 3 hours since the word of his bride's escape and despite him and the guard's best efforts, she was still nowhere to be found. He huffed exasperatedly as he wiped the sweat off his brow

He could just imagine the disappointed faces of the elders, his parents the kindgom...He couldn't be that repulsive to be wed to. Could he? As the sun hung high above the velevety sky, Suguru sat on a nearby bench carved out of the finest marble.

The raven haired prince placed his head in his hands as the sun beat down on the back of his neck. This is what he wanted after all he supposed, to not be married. But as he sat surrounded by winding paths and blooming flora stretched before him he wondered what it would be like. Could he have learned to love this woman?

Just as he got up to leave, he saw a flash of white from behind the foliage. An eyebrow quirked up as he got up to investige and as he slowly walked forward to investigate a soft murmur of hushed grunts and rustles of leaves reached his ears.

There, beneath a canopy of wisteria, Suguru spotted a lone figure. A young woman who her back turned to him and an lavish dress draped over her figure. A large array of lace, floral details and extravagantly large petticoats made into an over the top gown.

One that only could have been reserved for a princess.

Curiosity piqued, Suguru approached quietly, the crunch of gravel beneath his shoes masked by the soft rustling leaves. As he drew closer, he noticed the princess immersed trying (and failing) to scale the wall despite your nearly comically large dress, unaware of his presence.

Clearing his throat, Suguru spoke, his voice a velvety whisper that mingled with the silence of the garden. "Excuse me, are you needing some assistance, princess?" You turned with a bewildered look on your face, and a small gasp was let out at the sight of the man before you. As she studied the stranger who had interrupted your escape, you smoothed your skirts and tried to play it off.

"Uhm- No? No. I'm quite fine sir. Thank you." You responded annoyedly as you hiked up your dress and squinted your eyes at the man. He was handsome- there was no doubt about that, but you certainly didn't plan on getting caught. Where did he come from and why did he bother you? He might have recognized you because of your fancy appearance, but who was he?

"You can go and wait with the rest of those..gawkers for the ceremony. I know the prince must've sent you, but trust me. I'm perfectly fine."

Suguru's lips began to curl into a soft, amused smile as he took a step closer to you as you took one back. "I never doubted you were alright. You look perfectly determined and capable. But, do indulge me. What are you doing?" He asks with an entertained smile as he gestures to the wall.

Your eyebrows raised slightly and you took a sharp breath inwards. "I just told you. I'm not doing anything." You said exasperatedly as your hands balled into fist. This man was really messing with your escape (not that you were making that much progress in the first place).

The man raised an eyebrow at your words and you looked around before sighing and throwing your head back. "Fine. If you must know, I'm trying to climb this wall. And I can see you clearly find my failure amusing so I hope you're satisfied."

A pregnant pause fell over the two of you, and you hoped in revealing your purpose, he’d then mind his business and go away. "Climb...whatever for?" he questioned, genuinely intrigued by your confession.

"I-I..." You were getting more and more frustrated by the minute, and now you feared you revealed too much. "I...I'm escaping. I've heard rumors...he's cruel, and a monster! I would rather be alone for the rest of my than spend it with a demon I know nothing about."

Suguru's eyebrows flew to his hairline in bewilderment at your words. You couldn't've been talking about him...could you? He cleared his throat, obviously bewildered before inquiring further: "I-I'm sorry, but who are you talking about, princess?"

"I suppose that was rude..." you mumbled to yourself, as Suguru still stood bewildered before you awaiting an answer. You looked up at him, sensing he was wanting an honest answer before sighing. "The Prince! Suguru Geto...I know nothing of him and yet everyone expects me to give my life away to him...they turned their backs on me and my future...so I'm doing the same."

Realization dawned upon him as he nodded, absorbing your words. As your words sunk in a wave of sympathy washed over him. You were not as different from him as he had thought. You had dreams, aspirations, and hopes for your future.

As he stood with his solace you hoisted your skirts and turned back to the wall, putting your mind back on your escape and formulating a plan. “You know, if I grab there… yes!” you looked back to him over your shoulder, “You could assist me by lifting me up, you know." You say breathlessly as you prepared to scale the wall again.

He stared puzzled as he contemplated your ask. "But, marrying a prince couldn't be that bad? Besides, not all rumors are true...what if he's handsome?"

You rolled your eyes. "He could be the most handsome man ever and I wouldn't care. Looks have nothing to do with it and neither does personality. I just...want my own life. Now, here- come on. If you grab me here and hoist me up I could make it over the rocks and reach a carriage."

He considered your words as he watched you struggle, pondering the consequences. "But what will you do when people realize you're missing? And what about the prince- I'm sure he cares about your wellbeing." He says with a small smile as his eyes soften.

“I seriously doubt that, and besides I can worry about all of that later. Now, if you please…” you turned your back to him, still determined to proceed with your mission. “I just need a little help. Come. Hurry up.”

He licked his lips, caught in his own contemplation, before taking two slow steps forward. “I have absolutely no intention of helping you,” he declared, surprising you with his refusal.

At your surprise, you lost your grip on the vine and fell to the ground with a small grunt at the man's feet. Once you were untangled from your mass of petticoats you glared up at him, nostrils flared as you sat breathing heavily, almost as if you were giving him a moment to correct his words.

You marched towards him with sure steps, closing the gap between your bodies. "I am not a mere woman, I am a princess! Who is in need of help and you refuse? I ask- no demand you assist me in getting over the wall." you confronted him, your voice tinged with disbelief.

The man let out a laugh as he closed his eyes and shook his head in disbelief, or was it amusement? And after a moment of silence he replied, his voice filled with a twinge of playfulness.

"I only refuse when that princess is trying to climb over the wall to escape an arranged marriage with me." He declared, his words lingering in the atmosphere, exposing a reality that took you by surprise.

Shock rippled though through you, and you put your gloved hands up to your mouth and gasped. It felt as if all of your air had been knocked out of you as your eyes locked onto his onyx ones. This couldn't have been true...All the things you heard from your handmaidens, and your friends back home didn't describe this man at all. Yet here he was in front of you, a picturesque version of a prince every woman could've wished for. He was beautiful, with his dark hair and smoldering eyes, but you had noticed this when you first laid eyes on him. Back then he was just a random man, but now it all felt surreal. You eyelashes fluttered and your breath hitched and he closed the gap to grab your hands tenderly and press a kiss to the back of your glove.

He wore a smirk on his lips, a glimmer of mischief dancing in his gaze. He knew this whole time. “Hello, [name],” He said with a beaming smile. "I'm Suguru, the demon."

You stared up at him horrified, as he let out a small chuckle seemingly finding this whole situation funny. Standing there, trapped between amazement and doubt, your tongue seemed to have lost its purpose. You let out a noise akin to a squeal in embarrassment as he continued to laugh as you bowed deeply before him, your head nearly touching the grass of the garden.

"I-I'm deeply sorry," you said shakily as you slowly raised your head towards him. "please forgive me."

He lent his hand out from the ground and you stared at it bewildered, even wondering if it would be wise to take it after how much you disrespected him. Not sensing you would take it, he bent down to grab your hand and hoisted your mass of lace and flowers from the ground as you wobbled uncertainly in front of him.

"My Prince" you stammered, attempting to bow once more but he intercepted your actions smoothly. His hands gently caught your arms and as you stood up straighter his hands slowly guided themselves to your own, as your fingers intertwined. he gently guided your hand downwards with elegance, uniting your hands. The touch of his hand on yours captured your attention, as the sound of your heartbeat echoed in your ears.

"No, no. Please, I'm just Suguru to you. Nothing more." he corrected you in a soft-spoken manner, withdrawing his hand as he placed it on his chest.

"Suguru, I'm so sorry..." you began, but the words dying on your tongue in shame. "Please, you have to understand if I had known it was you-"

He interrupted you, his gaze unwavering. “You would have what? Not told me that you were trying to escape?”

“Well, yes. I mean…” Your words stumbled over each other, attempting to form a coherent defense. He laughed again, a sound you could get used to, but now it filled you with embarrassment.

"I apologize my prince." You said lowering your gaze in shame with a soft voice.

"Suguru." he corrected you once again, a gentle reminder. “Just Suguru.”

You smiled softly as you looked away in embarrassment as the weight of everything that had happened and all unspoken emotions lingered in the air. As he put a gentle hand on your shoulder, he leaned in close and whispered in you ear, a solemn promise to just you and him.

"I know what people say, and I know you don't wish to be wed to me...but perhaps if you'll have me as your husband, we could ignore all that and I could be just Suguru to you."

You gazed at him, your heart fluttering with newfound affection. The weight of his words sank in, and you found yourself captivated by the vulnerability he revealed.

You promptly defended yourself, asserting, "I never said that!," with a genuine tone in your voice.

He emphasized, "Oh, but you did," his eyes now sparkling mischievously.

You insisted, your tone slightly anxious, "I absolutely did not."

He persisted, his smile growing wider, "You definitely did."

You admitted, your voice becoming softer as you revealed your uncertainties and hesitations, "Well, I'm not sure… I don't really know you."

In a theatrical gesture, he pulled you close and straddled your back, "I don't know you either," his smile widening even further, "Except for the fact that you're terrible at climbing."

You smiled and smacked his chest playfully. "Hey! You try planning an escape in this." You said as you gestured to your elaborately made dress. As you looked up to meet his gaze once more, you found him already watching you, a broad smile adorning his face and a dreamy glint in his eyes. It was a contagious expression that tugged at your lips, and you couldn’t help but smile in response.

“What?” you asked softly, your curiosity piqued.

He opened his mouth, then closed it again, contemplating his words. Finally, he spoke, his voice filled with a sincere and gentle admiration. “You are incomparable. No one told me my bride would be this beautiful."

You felt your cheeks heat up as you laid you head on his chest and you felt him lay his chin atop you intricately styled hair, not caring about how it looks. The sun was setting and it began to cast a golden glow over you and Suguru's silhouette's as love began to grow within the atmosphere.

Wedding long forgotten, you two basked in the desire within the garden, all doubts and fears left behind. Perhaps this wouldn't be this bad after all. With your Suguru, you had no doubts everything would be alright.

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⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ notes: OMFGG Y'ALL SHE'S HEREEE MY BRAINCHILD ik she's like a week late but i'm actually so proud of how this came out and i hope you guys like it!! i'll probably drop some hc's later this week but reqs are open!

⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡ tags: @delicatelycraftedbambi @darious

𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐲 ♡

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𝙧𝙚𝙗𝙡𝙤𝙜 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚!

𝙘𝙤𝙥𝙮𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙡0𝙫3𝙝𝙖𝙨𝙝𝙞𝙧𝙖143 2024

[g0nta-g0kuhara]

Let's see. I remember the images of the characters dropping and EVERYONE had theories on who was what. Shinguuji was pinned as a Folklorist while people were losing There minds that there was a robot now.

I don't remember when but people were stoked that we finally had an artist among the cast.

THE VOICE REVEALS... I personally choked on my spit when I heard Ryoma.

Most of this is my personal experience, but I remember NDRV3 came out in Japan and the site I was using to watch all the new content KEPT CRASHING due to overload.

People thought Miu and Kaede were sisters? It's a bit fuzzy but I remember people thinking that.

THE HEEL TURN people had with Shinguuji when it came to leaning his whole twist. People up and dropped him, but now he seems to be decently liked.

When the English voices got revealed people were not happy lol. Esp with Ouma, people confused his voice with Shinguuji's and kinda flipped when they realized who was who.

(SDR2 story cause this cracks me up) Kyle Hebert (Souda's VA) accidentally confirmed SDR2 was coming to the west via a tweet. He thought the game released that day, but it was actually THH that released. So he basically gave us confirmation before any official announcements.

I HEARD THERE WERE STREAMS. What I would do to see screenshots of those chats, especially during the big moments....

I Saw that people thought Miu and Kaede were sisters! I think it was either misinformation from 4chan, confusion about Kaede's secret twin, or maybe both.

THAT STORY ABOUT KYLE HEBERT... That's so funny oh my god. I would've been horrified at myself, but they didn't seem too mad considering they brought him back for v3 LMAO

Re: Korekiyo, I think its a running trend from v3's initial release for there to be extreme knee-jerk reactions that people soften on over time, including with korekiyo

[cherub014]

Casually losing my mind over the fact that Total Drama:

1. Is still running with a 15 year hotstreak

2. Has probably the most diverse representation of any collective series I have seen to date

3. Has a huge and incredibly active fandom and is probably one of the few surviving "childhood" show fandoms to be THIS active

Honestly? Props to that keep doing what you're doing

[thedorkdionysia]

alright. I gotta rant about something.

so I'm sure you all probably know by now that David Tennant has made a return as the Doctor in Doctor Who after like 12 years since the end of his run and almost 10 years since the last time he was in the show at all. even if you don't watch the show, you probably know by now on account of how many people are losing their minds over it.

and apparently people are somehow thinking it's racist that this is happening. because Ncuti Gatwa, a black actor, was announced as the casting choice for the next major incarnation of the Doctor a few months before the centenary special Power of the Doctor aired, only for Tennant to show up at the end of POTD after 13 regenerated, leaving many people wondering where the new Doctor was, before we were only treated to a short teaser of the upcoming special that included the briefest glimpse of Ncuti at the end... aaaand then the announcement that the show would be on hiatus again for another 13 months until the 60th anniversary special in November 2023.

now, I understand that it's definitely a bad look for them to sort of bait and switch people like that, I was watching with friends and we were all expecting to see Ncuti after the special and then we were all losing it when we saw David instead. but there are people who are claiming that not just RTD, but also David Tennant himself, are doing this out of intentional, malicious racism against Ncuti and are basically just making things even worse than they were in the chibnall era (somehow).

but that honestly just... makes no fucking sense. literally what would be the reason for RTD and the BBC to cast a black man as the doctor, make a big deal out of it on social media, and then not put him in the show at all just because he's being maliciously racist? I think it would have pretty much the same effect for RTD to cast another white man to play the newest incarnation of the doctor, intentionally turning Ncuti down in the process, and then just rolling with him instead.

so even though I get why it could definitely be taken kind of racist, I don't think that it was intentionally done that way. but then you might be wondering, "well if it wasn't malicious, then why cast DT and announce HIM as the 14th doctor when it should have been Ncuti??" well, it's more complicated than any of how the people angrily ranting about it are explaining it, but I think this video explains it well:

basically the way this video explains it is this: RTD came back to the show at kind of a weird time. the last episode they had written, filmed, and planned to air was POTD, which wrapped production not long after RTD was announced to take the reins again in October 2021. also, coming up on the horizon not long after POTD was supposed to air was the 60th anniversary, which would obviously be a big deal for the show-- as the longest running sci-fi TV series in the world, every major anniversary is a huge milestone.

the only problem is that this kinda left RTD with a logistical nightmare. he didn't have a new doctor yet, and even if he were able to get one the day after taking over the show, there just wasn't enough time to write, film, edit, and air a whole season of the show before the 60th. and RTD wouldn't really want to introduce the new doctor during the anniversary either: the anniversary has brought back older doctors since the show's 10th anniversary, and no matter who he cast, they would most likely get overshadowed by the nostalgic figureheads alongside them even if their performance was absolutely top notch.

and there was also another problem: when RTD DID finally cast Ncuti as the new doctor, he was busy filming the new season of sex education as well as the Barbie movie with Margot Robbie. which left him with another conundrum: should he wait for the actor who really, REALLY won him over in his audition to be available for the show, or should he tell him that he did amazing but they need someone more readily available?

ultimately, RTD chose the former, and I think it was the right decision. but that still left a gap in the anniversary special that RTD had to fill before Ncuti would be able to commit to the show full time. so, in the interest of the nostalgia that comes with anniversary specials and the part of the doctor still needing someone to bridge the gap between Jodie and Ncuti, he turned to a fan favorite: David Tennant. and that's pretty much where we are today. Tennant isn't REPLACING Ncuti, and he's really not replacing Jodie either. he's a placeholder, a way to get things from point A to point B.

and people are saying that DT is overshadowing Ncuti just by... existing and being part of the show again, but the thing is, they are actively trying to give Ncuti the spotlight. RTD and the show's official social media accounts both announced Ncuti's casting a week BEFORE even mentioning the fact that David Tennant and Catherine Tate would be coming back for the 60th. RTD has made numerous posts about Ncuti and how absolutely thrilled they both are for this new upcoming era, and he's barely even mentioned DT since his original announcement. (not because of some kind of estrangement between the two, if that wasn't obvious: he's just acknowledging that this isn't David's era that we're about to see.) even David Tennant himself has spoken in interviews about how legitimately AMAZING Ncuti is as the doctor and now excited he is for him as well. at this point the only ones who are actually focusing more on David and less on Ncuti ARE THE ONES COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW RTD AND DAVID ARE TRYING TO OVERSHADOW NCUTI. (and also all the media outlets trying to bank on David's return to make money selling stories, which is a whole new post.)

by trying to make such a big moral dilemma out of David Tennant being back for no more than three episodes a year from now, people on the internet are basically becoming the exact type of person they're trying to be mad at: they're focusing more on the guy who's coming back temporarily to help things transition forward, and less on the fact that things are going to have such a bright future ahead with the new guy, we just have to actually get there first.

and like I said: I don't know if it was the best choice either, and from what I've seen, POTD was originally supposed to end by cutting off before we actually saw the end result of 13's regeneration, which I would have been okay with, but the point is that RTD was in a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation and ultimately tried to do his best to give Ncuti the chance to shine without getting overpowered by the major event of the 60th anniversary in his first ever appearance on the show, and I think he's doing his best with that. and as far as the numbering issue, I'm not thrilled about tenthree/tenteen/retro-ten or whatever you want to call him being referred to as the "fourteenth doctor" either, but since the numbering system was pretty much meaningless after Moffat's whole "well actually eleven is actually thirteen because something something war doctor something something tentoo something something vanity" thing, and is now even more meaningless thanks to chibnall and the timeless child, I honestly wouldn't split too many hairs over it. most of the official announcements from the show's social media didn't even give Ncuti a number to begin with anyway, and the only primary source I found that actually called him "the fourteenth doctor" right after the announcement was a BBC news article that wasn't even written by someone affiliated with the show anyway, so the whole thing is probably a misunderstanding that's spiralled out of control anyway. either way, it's just a number, it's not like the doctor even refers to themselves by their number in the show anyway.

TL;DR: David Tennant is only playing the Doctor again temporarily to help transition the show into Ncuti's run to help relieve him from the onus of trying to carry the 60th anniversary as the main Doctor in his first appearance as the Doctor, and we should all be focusing less on him and more on what we have to look forward to from Ncuti.

[streetlight11]

Love Notes

Summary: People usually mistake Slytherins as the mean and nasty ones. Nobody told you that you would be stuck with the loud and obnoxious boy from Gryffindor. One day during your fifth year, you started receiving anonymous notes in your books, pockets, table, etc. The question is, who gave them to you?

Theme: Hogwarts au, enemies to lovers

Genre: fluff, angst [not really]

Warnings: none

WC: 4.9k

Pairing: Gryffindor!Haknyeon x Slytherin!FemReader

a/n: Hi again :) I've been binge watching Harry Potter movies for the past few days and I love it so much. So here's a little Hogwarts fic with Hakkie! Do send me requests if you have any! I'm open to writing them :)

Going to Hogwarts was probably the best thing to happen to you. And getting yourself sorted into Slytherin house was also the best thing to ever happen to you. Except, nobody told you that you would have a horrendous time being in the same classes as the loud and obnoxious boy from Gryffindor.

His name?

Was Ju Haknyeon.

“Did you lose your way to class again today?” Haknyeon teased when you arrived at your seat that just so happens to be right in front of him. You were in your fifth year and yet he has never once gone a day without getting on a single nerve on your body.

“Did you lose your pacifier on your way here cause you can’t seem to keep your mouth shut.” You scowled at him only to earn a soft chuckle from him.

“Look who’s talking now…” Haknyeon smirks, earning a kick to his desk from you. Your seat partner and also one of your close friends, Wooyoung couldn’t help but roll his eyes at the said boy.

Professor Snape finally dismissed the class as everyone quickly scrambled out of the room. You were walking with Wooyoung and Yeosang as the former began rambling about his terrible date yesterday when you suddenly felt an arm over your shoulder. The last person you hoped for it to be, ends up proving you wrong the minute he spoke.

“Hey hey, have you practiced for the Quidditch game this season? Wouldn’t wanna lose your Quidditch title to other houses.” Haknyeon whispered into your ear, making you push his face away.

“Do you ever shut up?” You said as he smirked, casually pursing his lips into a kissy face.

You rolled your eyes at him, elbowing his stomach to make him leave your side. Haknyeon left your side for a brief moment before coming back to you to stop in front of you while leaning down a little to match your height. Once he was right in front of you, he smirked cheekily at you.

“I won’t shut up when I’m with you, darling.” He whispered.

You cupped his face with both hands, only to lean in to let your lips hover over his as you whispered under your breath, “Don’t make me do it for you, sweetheart.” The moment you pulled away from him and began to walk away, Haknyeon could’ve sworn he felt his heart skip a few beats.

“Now, class, please open to page 367.” Professor McGonagall announced as you heard the sounds of pages being turned. You did the same, flipping the pages a few at a time until a slip of note drops out from your book. It was a pretty blue colour that has been folded into the shape of a flower.

“Did you put this in my book?” You asked Wooyoung who was seated beside you, only for him to shake his head. Just then, a voice came from behind you.

“Oh look, the Slytherin’s princess got herself a love note.” Haknyeon said. It annoyed you to the point where you had to cast a spell on him from under your desk to shut him up for 2 hours. A few weeks have gone by and you have been getting anonymous notes slipped into your textbooks, locker, and sometimes even in your coat pockets.

However, all the notes always end up in your bag, never touched or read before.

It was a Thursday afternoon and you were just walking into your Transfiguration class when a female student from Hufflepuff came up to you giddily excited as she informed you what she saw.

“Omg Y/N! Someone gave you a rose and a letter! It’s on your desk!” She squeaked, allowing a couple of eyes to land on you, who was standing at the back of the class with Wooyoung and Yeosang. With that being said, you glanced over to your desk to find that she was right.

However, you noticed that Haknyeon’s table was empty. Maybe he finally got sick and couldn’t come to class today.

“The Slytherin’s princess got a gift today huh? That’s new.”

Maybe not.

Haknyeon said casually as he strolls past you with his hands tucked into his pant’s pockets while he makes his way over to his desk. You rolled your eyes at the back of his head before walking up to your desk and soon took the rose and note only to stuff it in your bag.

“Why don’t you read it outloud for all of us to hear, darling? I’m sure your admirer would love to see the way your eyes turn into heart shapes for them.” Haknyeon smirked.

You couldn’t lie, Haknyeon has in fact gotten slightly more manlier in built and also a bit more nicer looking in terms of his face features.

Which is why you’d be damned if you admitted out loud that your heart did a little flip when he smirked at you.

“The last person I’d wanna read it aloud to is you so no, that won’t happen.” You grumbled before sitting down at your desk. Wooyoung couldn’t help but chuckle as he told you about Haknyeon's offended face he made after you said that.

A few hours later, everyone was making their way back to their common rooms after dinner. You were just walking towards the Slytherin’s common room when Felix spoke up to you, “Hey, is it true you’ve been getting love notes from someone in class?”

“I don’t know what they are, I’ve never opened them.” You confessed, earning a few gasps from your friends.

“Aren’t you even a slight bit curious?” Minho asked.

“Look, I doubt it’s even real. It might just be a prank from someone. I don’t know…” You said almost confidently.

“Oh come on, just open one and see what it says. It doesn’t hurt to read one.” Wooyoung encouraged you as you rolled your eyes at him. It was already after hours. Everyone was asleep except you. So you quietly tip-toed your way to the living area, only to sit near the green fireplace with your bag filled with the notes you kept for the past 5 weeks. You took one of the notes out and soon unfolded it one after another.

“You look pretty today.”

“Your eyes sparkle like the green flames of your house.”

“You make me forget why I’m in this class.”

“Your smile could cure my sadness.”

“If only the clouds would make way for a sunshine like you”

“Don’t lose that smile, it’s the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen”

“Are you a love potion? Cause I feel like I’ve fallen in love with you”

You then happened to take out the note that was attached to the rose you got earlier in which it said;

“A pretty flower for a pretty girl like you.”

And the list goes on and on as you read them. However, one thing you noticed was the lack of initials, leaving these notes anonymous.

“Who are you?”

This question swirls in your head as you keep these notes in a little treasure chest your mom gave you for your 15th birthday.

You were on your way to the Quidditch field to play for the Quidditch Tournament with your team members. Upon making it to the courtyard, you just so happen to bump into Haknyeon. You noticed the Red and Gold striped sweater, along with his pants and a cloak in contrast to your full Quidditch attire together with the arms and leg gears.

“Hey guys, mind if I steal ‘yours truly’ for a moment? I promise I’ll bring her back to you guys in one whole.” Haknyeon smiles innocently to your friends, earning a few snickers from them but they nonetheless left you alone with him.

Once they were out of sight, you turned to him with a frown.

“What do you want now, Ju? And make it quick. I have a game to win.” You snapped, earning a chuckle from him.

“Relax beasty, I won’t hold you back for long.”

“So what do you want?”

“You know this is a seasonal championship right?”

“And?”

“And this year’s winner will be titled the Season’s Champion, yes?”

“O...kay?” You raised an eyebrow at him in question, not sure where this conversation was heading to.

“So let’s make a bet.”

You started to laugh as you clutched your stomach, afraid of growing six packs while you did that. Unfortunately, you didn’t get the same response from him which made you confused and eventually stopped.

“A bet? You wanna make a bet? Sure. You’ll only be crying at the end of it cause Slytherin’s gonna take the prize home.”

“Hmm, I wouldn’t be so sure if I were you. So let’s make a bet.” Haknyeon urges you again, to which you couldn’t help but agree just so you could prove him wrong.

“Fine. If Slytherin wins, you’re gonna leave me alone for the rest of the year.” You said.

“And if Gryffindor wins, you have to go on 3 dates with me.” He announced. You weren’t gonna lie, you were a little shocked by his proposal but you didn’t want to back out now so you shook hands on it.

“Deal.”

“Choi Jongho has gotten the snitch! Gryffindor wins!” Lee Jordan, the commentator from Gryffindor announced as you slammed your fist onto your broomstick. You’ve lost a few times before throughout your 5 years in Hogwarts but today was a little different as you had your bet with Haknyeon hanging by a thread.

You were floating about 10 feet away from Gryffindor’s stand, your gaze naturally fleeting to the left only to lock eyes with the blonde haired devil from Gryffindor who had a smirk on his face before he mouthed something so clear to you.

“I win.”

You couldn’t even respond to him so you simply flew down and back into your pitch tent along with the rest of your teammates. After you were done with post-game preps, you all began to make your way back to your common rooms.

It wasn’t until you were at the grand staircase that you bumped into Haknyeon and his friends. He gave you a cheeky little wink before snapping his fingers and soon, you felt a slip of paper magically appear in your hands.

You kept it in your hands until you went back, only opening it when you were in your bed.

“Nice game. I hope you don’t forget about our bet. See you at Three Broomsticks Inn, this Saturday. 12pm. Don’t be late. Oh, and, wear prettily ;) - JHN”

You were definitely in for a treat.

The day finally came as you made an excuse to your friends saying you couldn’t go with them to Hogsmeade because you promised to help Ginny with her Muggle studies. The minute they left, you got upstairs to change out of your pyjamas and into some comfortable jeans, a sweater, a denim jacket and a pair of worn out sneakers.

You teleported to Hogsmeade using the Floo Powder your mom gave you just in case you needed to rush home due to an emergency.

You arrived at a dark alley in Hogsmeade, making sure your friends weren’t around before you left the safety of that alley. Carefully walking past some villagers, you found your way to the Inn without getting caught. With one gentle push of the wooden door, you were immediately greeted by the bustling customers.

You looked around the room to find for the devil who shall not be named and Lord Behold, he waves over to you from one of the tables across the room. You almost lost your footing when you saw what he wore.

It was almost as if he knew what you were going to wear. He was wearing black pants with a denim jacket. Simple yet so good looking.

You went over to him only to sit on his left where it was nearer to the edge of the semi circle couch.

“You’re late, you know?” Haknyeon laughs.

“Yeah but I’m here aren’t I?” You scoffed softly under your breath, earning a little giggle from him.

“On our first date too? You’re a terrible one.” He joked.

“Fine then. Go find someone who’s on time for your date, maybe they’ll actually arrive earlier than you.” Right before you could slide out of the seat, Haknyeon gently grabs your wrist to stop you.

“Relax, I’m just kidding… Come on, butterbeer on me. Deal?” He asked, shaking his wallet in between his fingers as though telling you he really meant it when he said he’ll pay for it.

Of course you couldn’t let this moment up, which is why you agreed to it. Unfortunately, right before he could slide out the opposite end of the table, your eyes flew over to the front doors where the bell chimed indicating a customer. That’s when you saw your friends walking in and you could’ve sworn they would see you in a matter of seconds if they just turned to the left slightly.

“Oh shit!” You cursed as you grabbed hold of Haknyeon’s collar only to drag him out of the table and soon towards the back. Haknyeon was a little taken aback by your sudden aggression as he began to ask you a series of questions.

You quickly pulled him behind one of the pillars, shoving him against the concrete wall as you peeked past the pillar.

“Okay, if you want to kill me, at least do it when we’re in private.” He teased you.

“Shut up. My friends are here. I lied to them saying I can’t join them.” You whispered, trying to see if your friends wouldn’t make it to the back. What you didn’t realize was the way Haknyeon was discreetly checking you out.

“You know, for a Slytherin, you’re not as sly as you think you are. What makes you think they can’t figure out it’s you from a dist-”

“Kiss me.”

You suddenly spoke as he stared at you with wide eyes. He almost couldn’t believe his ears when you said that.

“What?”

“I said kiss me!” You loudly whispered but your eyes were frantically flickering back and forth to something behind him.

However, right before you could yell at him, you felt him snaking his right arm around your waist while the other hand reached up to cup your cheek, pulling you into a soft and gentle kiss. You fluttered your eyelids close as he turned you so that his back would be facing the open area while your smaller form gets shielded from the public eye.

You could hear your friend’s voices getting closer and closer and eventually made their way past Haknyeon’s back. You could’ve sworn you heard some of them snicker and scoff at your unknown presence.

Once they are gone, Haknyeon pulls back from you with the softest sound as he caresses your cheek for a moment.

Suddenly your heart was picking up speed against your chest. You locked eyes with him for a second or two, feeling him tilt his head slightly to make his lips brush over yours again purposely before pulling away completely.

“I reckon we should leave?” He chuckled, making you nod.

“Yes please.”

With that being said, he let you leave the hiding spot first, making sure he used his body to block you from unwanted view.

A few hours passed where he took you to a few of his favourite shops in Hogsmeade, including some personal spots around town where he usually goes when he needs space to be by himself. You were now making your way back to the castle as you both managed to not quarrel for more than a minute of being with each other.

You must admit, it was nice getting to know Haknyeon better instead of fighting with him like usual.

It has been four days since your first date with Haknyeon and again, you still received the notes. This time, it said;

“You’re cute. Can I keep you?”

With that, you couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle.

“What? Did the person who gave you those letters finally revealed himself?” Wooyoung asked from beside you, only for you to show him the note.

“No, but isn’t it tiring to keep thinking of cheesy love notes to write almost everyday?” You whispered to him upon hearing Professor McGonagall enter the class.

“Well, I would say this person is totally head over heels for you to even write these from day 1.” Wooyoung speaks utter nonsense most of the time, but maybe he made some sense today.

You were on your second date with Haknyeon, as he promised to take you on a ride. What ride might I ask? Not just any ride. He was taking you on a ride on a Hippogriff.

“Are you sure we won’t get in trouble for this? I really don’t want to be expelled.” You warned him as he laughed at you.

“Aren’t you being a little too goody two shoes for a Slytherin?” Haknyeon teased, only to get a good slap to his arm from you.

“Say anything stupid again and I swear you’ll be the one swimming in the lake with the damn Lochness.” You threatened as he raised his arms in a surrender but there was a wide grin on his face. Something you’ve grown to adore these days.

With that, he soon hops on the magical creature easily, leaving you nervous. Haknyeon had his hand extended out for you to take but you were afraid.

“Y/N come on, we don’t have forever!” He said.

“What if I fall?” You panicked but you ended up unconsciously whining, making him giggle.

“I won’t let you fall. I promise. Now come on, darling.” Haknyeon jerks his hand to you again, only for you to stare at it for a bit before you finally take his hand into yours. He easily pulled you up and onto the animal’s back. You sat in front of him while you gently grabbed onto the creature’s neck, being careful that you don’t accidentally harm it.

“Okay Buckbeak, show us whatchu got.” Haknyeon said as he gave the creature a few pats to its belly and soon, the creature took off flying into the sky. You let out a scream, hugging the neck tightly while Haknyeon holds onto nothing.

He clearly had more experience than you in terms of flying on this creature’s back.

You had your eyes closed the entire time even when you felt the smooth glide across the air. Still being stubborn to open your eyes, you felt him tap your shoulders.

“Y/N come on! Open your eyes! You’re missing out on the view!” His voice sounded so excited behind you, it almost made you believe it wasn’t the same boy who has been a living nuisance to you all these while.

“No way! I’m just gonna panic even more if I see how high we are!” You yelled over the loud gush of wind that might be rendering your hearing.

“I promise we’ll be fine, just open your eyes! Trust me!” Haknyeon reassured you as you felt him gently slide his hands down your arms and onto your wrist to pull them away from the creature’s neck. You shook your head desperately, hoping he’d leave you alone. Unfortunately for you, he didn’t.

Instead, he thought it would be a good idea to scare you. Maybe that way you’ll finally open your eyes.

And you did.

Because the minute you heard him yell for help, you immediately opened your eyes and turned around only to find him seated firmly on Buckbeak’s back with his arms crossed over his chest.

“You bloody piece of shit!” You huffed in annoyance as you turned back around only for Buckbeak to playfully tilt his body up to make you fall back slightly. That’s when a string of curses left your lips while you desperately grabbed onto its neck.

“Don’t do that Buckbeak!” You scolded the animal, only to get a little sound from him. Just then, Haknyeon decides to challenge you.

“Wanna know what it feels to fly?”

“Uhh, no?”

“It’ll be fun. Here.” Haknyeon said as he slowly reached over to grab your wrists while his firm chest softly pressed against your back but for some reason, it made you feel some sort of safety.

“W-What are you doing?” You stuttered, only for him to smile and soon spoke into your ears leaving a soft tingling feel to your skin.

“Just trust me.”

With that being said, he gently spreads your arms out on either side of you, making them act like wings for you. As Buckbeak glided through the air, you imagined you were flying until you heard him whisper into your ear, “Close your eyes.”

You did as he said, only for it to enhance the imagination. A smile naturally appears on your lips as you completely didn’t see the way he was staring at you from beside you. Ignoring the way his hands found your waist and left it there for the rest of the ride.

It was your third and final date for the bet you made with him. For some odd reason, you didn’t want it to end but of course you couldn’t tell him that. So when you met him at the lake, you looked slightly down and he noticed. Haknyeon wouldn’t let this slide easily which is why he decided to tease you about it.

“What’s with the long face, darling? Already attached to me?”

You scoffed as you approached him by the swing only for you to take a seat at the wooden plank beside his seated figure on the grass patch.

“So what? This was just for the bet anyway.” You mumbled under your breath, not realizing that he heard you.

The next few minutes went by like how your previous dates went. Constant teasing, playful jokes and banter, friendly chats and even random fights that involve you throwing a handful of dead leaves at him while he scoops water from the lake and proceeds to toss it at you.

At the end of this short date, you had just arrived at the end of the wooden bridge when he wraps his fingers around your wrist to stop you from walking any further.

“I just remembered I promised my friends I’d meet them at the Three Broomsticks Inn in like 5 minutes so I have to leave you from here on.” He said.

“Right…” You said, your voice sounded a little sad.

“I guess the bet’s over. Thanks… for... well, going on the dates with me.” Haknyeon said, eyes flickering back and forth between your eyes and the wooden panels behind you.

“A bet’s a bet right? I’d be a wimp if I didn’t do it.” You smiled.

There was a beat of awkward silence as you got ready to leave when he said something that made your stomach flip.

“That’s it? No goodbye kiss? I thought this was a date?” Haknyeon pouted, keeping his gaze on you as stable as possible. You almost couldn’t believe your ears.

Did he just ask you for a kiss?

“I… Umm… Okay?” You stuttered in confusion, earning a soft little giggle from him.

However, the nerves soon disappear the minute he takes a step closer and soon wraps one hand around your waist while the other cups your face before he leans down to let his lips seal yours. You instantly fluttered your eyes shut, letting your hands rest on his chest.

The kiss felt so genuine, you almost forgot how you used to fight with this same boy 24/7. Haknyeon smiled against your lips as he pulled back for air shortly before kissing you again.

His lips were intoxicating, you almost forgot how to breathe. Haknyeon gives you a cheeky little lick to your bottom lip as he soon pulls away from you, leaving you breathless. You pressed your forehead softly against his as you kept your eyes shut, too embarrassed to look at him at this point.

His chuckle fills your ears as he cups your face with both hands and whispers against your lips.

“Go. Be safe. Avoid the common grounds, that’s where Filch always lurks around.” Soon after, he gave your lips another peck before you felt wind whooshing around you. Immediately, his touch left you and it almost made you crumble to the ground.

What did he do to you?

A few days later, you were just having lunch with everyone else at their respective house tables and your friends surrounded you when you saw a note slipping past from under your plate. A pretty baby blue one that is. You carefully unfolded it, only to see it read;

“I realized I was thinking of you, and I began to wonder how long you’ve been on my mind. Then it occurred to me: Since the day I met you, you’ve never left.”

For some reason, those words meant something to you.

It was as though you knew this person and have created some sort of a bond with them. And yet, you still don’t know who. However, you do now have a little suspicion on who it was and who these notes belonged to. So to test your theory, you looked up from your table, almost immediately catching the eyes of the same pair of brown ones you’ve grown accustomed to.

Haknyeon was already staring like he knew you were going to find him. What surprised you the most is the fact that he didn’t even flinch when you caught him.

You held eye contact for a second before you got cut off by Wooyoung putting a scoopful of mashed potatoes onto your plate. You gave the boy a little smack to his head, earning a choke from him. When you looked back over to Haknyeon, he was already talking to his friend with the back of his head facing you.

A few hours later, you were having your Potions class when a note popped out of nowhere from under your book. To avoid getting minus points from Snape, you quickly shoved the note into your cloak pocket and yet you still got called by the Head of Slytherin for not paying attention.

Therefore, having to serve detention.

You could only curse him in your head while you cleaned every single flask and cauldron pots till they were spick and span.

Once you were done, you left the room only to find Haknyeon leaning against the wall with one leg bent to rest his foot on the wall. He was busy playing with his Patronus charm when his eyes flicked up upon hearing the door open.

“Haknyeon? What are you doing here? Don’t we have Transfiguration right now?” You loudly whispered as you approached him only to drag him towards the end where you were hidden from Snape’s office door. Once you were hiding behind the pillar, you turned to peek past the wall with Haknyeon right in front of you.

The hallway was empty thanks to the classes going on currently but that doesn’t mean you were free from not being caught out of class.

“I told Professor McGonagall I’m having stomach aches so she excused me to go to the hospital wing.” Haknyeon explained, only for you to frown.

“And why were you waiting outside Snape’s office, might I ask?”

“To see you.”

“You couldn’t wait till I come to class?” You asked with a slight tease in your voice.

“Needed to see you right after detention, so that I could do this.”

With that being said, he easily captures you into a kiss. You sighed through your nose as you cupped his neck to pull him closer to you. Haknyeon wraps his arms around your waist, letting himself trap you against the wall and his body. You changed your head positions to be at a slightly more comfortable state, feeling him squeeze your sides.

Just then, he pulled away for a breath, making it easy for you to slip in the question.

“All those notes were from you, weren’t they?”

Haknyeon grew quiet for a moment but then decided to just come clean with you. After all, that’s what he has been wanting to do anyway.

“Are you disappointed?”

“I would be if you told me this 4 weeks ago… But now? Not so much.” You smiled.

“Really?” He asked.

“Would I do this if I was disappointed?” You asked only to kiss him again. Haknyeon smirks against your lips as you feel him lift you up and spin you around. When he placed you back down, he gave you a peck on the lips and soon spoke up.

“Should I stop giving you notes then?”

“Go ahead. Cause I’ve already won the prize.”

“You sure have.”

~~~

[not-me-simping-for-blasty]

Wrong Number, Asshole - A Bakugou Katsuki Soulmate AU

All Parts

Part 21:

You were nervous, practically fainting under the pressure as you pulled open the hospital’s front door. The trip to Jaku was fairly easy, only a brief 45 minutes, and in that time you hadn’t managed to calm yourself at all.

You stomach was rolling with nerves- twisting and turning and making you feel so very sick. You tried to reason with yourself, tried to convince yourself to lower your expectations. There was nothing for you to be worried about, here! You hadn’t lied! Or hid anything, or pretended like you were a good person when you maybe weren’t. 

Bakugou did that. He did that and he was the reason your eyes were still puffy and why your head still ached. He had things to apologize for- not you.

So why did it feel like all you wanted to do was throw your arms around him and forget everything and just be happy?

The longer you sat with it, the more you thought you understood. Even if he was bad, even if he did bad things, he was still your soulmate. He was still the other half of you and you were selfish- so, so selfish and you couldn’t make yourself give that up. Couldn’t ever possibly make a strong enough argument for abandoning him. You knew that, even if you didn’t want to admit it. It was why you were even at the hospital after all.

You shook your head, trying to focus on the matter at hand. 

“Hi,” You greeted, hoping your smile seemed genuine to the receptionist. “Bakugou Katsuki, please, room 427.”

She just looked at you funny, tapping at the device in her ear. “Yeah, I got another girl down here asking for Dynamite? Where’s security?”

You heart began seizing, lungs stuttering with panic as she continued to stare you down. After a long fifteen seconds she spoke again.

“Well, isn’t it your lucky day. Apparently, he wants to see you. What a surprise.” She announced un-enthusiastically, handing you a slip of paper. “Take the stairs to the left, all the way up to level 4, and then follow the instructions on the paper.” 

You just nodded in a daze, holding the paper in your shaking fingers and moving towards the stairs. Suddenly, you were even more nervous than before. You pushed open the stair doors, and realized this moment felt bigger than you. Bigger than anything in your entire life. Every singular event and decision had brought you here and the only thing you could do was stare dumbly at the stairs in front of you.

No. You knocked a closed fist gently against your forehead. I’m fine. I’m been waiting forever for this shit. It’s just stupid Bakugou.

You took one step, pulling your shaky legs along with two hands on the guardrail. Another step, only pull. Another step another pull. You were conquering the stairs, and this moment, gaining momentum before you knew it. With feet moving unbidden and sure and careful and climbing, you rise, steps taking you higher and higher until you hit the 4th floor. It’s a maze of hallways from there, a strange puzzle of paintings that all look the same and tiles that are two shades too dark and doctors and people rushing past and shoving, but your feet are steady, one after the other, fast, fast, faster, and you don’t falter. You don’t falter and you walk down another hallway, look at your paper, take a left, walk a little further, look at your paper, take a right, walk further and faster and further and farther, past room 423, past room 424, past room 425, past room 426, turn another corner, rush past a man wheezing in a wheelchair, skid to a stop- room 427. 

You heart hammers in your chest- beating against your ribcage and threatening to burst through your too-thin skin. Your breath shudders, fingers shaking as you push the door- push it open, and wider, and widest, and open.

His face is the very first thing you see. It’s all you can see. All the machines and the hospital bed, all the bandages and the IV’s stuck into his skin- they all fade away. There’s just him and his blonde hair and the way his shoulder’s slope and the defined musculature of his arms. He is real and breathing and solid, and so, so, beautiful. Bakugou’s every breath seems to arrest you, keep you in place and strung tight like a live-wire, electricity running trails of fire through every vein- and his eyes.

His eyes that are darker, deeper, duller- less like raging volcanoes, and more like delicate rubies. They’re red. Red like nothing you’ve ever seen before, and startling and surprising, but it’s not an angry red. Not a violent red. You decide then that Bakugou is a soft, dignified red- he’s hot wax cooling over a sealed envelope, like a slowly healing cut just beginning to fade. 

Something in you slots into place. You feel it in your mind, in your bones, in your chest. You’re not itchy anymore, you’re not searching. There is no puzzle left to solve and your finally have all the pieces to your soul; no longer aching anymore for something you knew you should’ve always had. Your skin is finally yours- no longer loose and ill-fitting and stretched thin saving room for someone you hadn’t met yet. You felt right- finally. Settled for the first time in your entire life, like somehow, you’d always knew you’d end up standing exactly where you were.

You think Bakguou must feel it too. He nods something almost imperceptible, but his face softens. He looks so sure- so confident as he looks at you. Like he always expected you to be exactly who you were. Like some part of him too always somehow knew this was going to happen.

You’re tearing up before you can help it, rushing into the room and to his bedside.  

“What are ya fuckin’ cryin’ for, idiot?” Bakugou huffs, but his voice comes out strained; buried under thick, barely-restrained emotion. “Nothin’ new left to cry about now, stop it.”

“I can’t,” You’re wiping at tears with your sleeve. “After all this time- my whole life- It’s just- you’re- you’re you. ”

“Course I fuckin’ am.” He says. Bakugou then clears his throat, voice becoming much softer. “Always was to you.” 

“I-I know. But it’s just- you’re real.” 

He can’t say it back, you can see it in his pinched face and blushing cheeks, but Bakugou nods. You know he feels the same. 

“It’s- I- I just didn’t think I’d ever be here,” You start, sinking easily into the chair next to his bed. “And after everything I jus-”

“I’m sorry!” His voice interrupts the relative quiet, cutting through like a knife. He nearly screamed his words, and when you look over at him Bakugou won’t meet your eyes. He’s studying the hospital blankets beneath his fingers, folding and clenching them between fingers gone white from the pressure. “I- I mean that. More than fuckin’ anything.” 

“I know.” You say.

The room goes quiet again, and any of the calming completeness you had felt earlier seemed to be fading. Suddenly it’s not just the feeling of finding your soulmate running through you, but the feeling of finding Bakugou. Bakugou who is sitting in front of you, injured and weaker than Dynamite and he doesn’t look like someone who could hurt anything or anyone but then you remember that video- that scream, those eyes. 

“Just- fuckin’ say it already. I can see your face, idiot.” Bakugou’s voice is authoritative but not pushy. Inquisitive but not demanding. “It’s- I know your holding back, so just fuckin’ quit it already, alright?.”

“It’s- I just need to know. You said, on the phone, that it wasn’t you, in the video.” You close your eyes. If you look at him any longer you think you’ll lose your nerve. “If it wasn’t you, who was it?”

“I-” You watch as his face falls, eyebrows pulling together. Then he’s turning red, wringing his fingers together and casting his eyes toward your shoes instead of your face. “Can ya- can I- I just have to think. Give me a second. I have to make sure I get the fuckin’ words right.” 

You nod. Bakugou seems to leave you for a moment, eyes un-focusing and fingers twitching minutely. He suddenly looks up, meeting your eyes.

“It’s- I shouldn’ta said that shit. It was- I did that. Me.” He admits, words tight and strained like they’re hard for him to speak. He’s got a hand pressed to his mouth, head turned sharply to face the window. He refuses to meet your eyes once more. “But- I’m not- I’m tryin’ not to fuckin’ be like that anymore! I’m workin’ on it or whatever. Since then! E-ever since then.” 

“Okay.” You nod. “What happened to the person? In the video?”

Your question seems to upset him, and he throws his hand harshly against the bed. Bakugou breathes- eyebrows pinched together tightly until his shoulders aren’t held together so tensely anymore.

“I told you. I didn’t- everybody always talks about that fuckin’ stupid-ass video but it was only the camera!” He grits his teeth suddenly, sharply inhaling and exhaling until his jaw relaxes once more. His eyes still remain screwed shut. “I meant that. What I said on the phone. The fuckin’ person was fine! Wasn’t fuckin’ hurt. J-just scared.” 

You want to believe him. More than anything you want to believe him, but those eyes you saw were hard to forget. They almost seemed like they belonged to someone else- like they couldn’t possibly have belonged to the same guy who’d called you sunshine and helped you with your anxiety and cleared his schedule every night at exactly 7:00 PM. The Bakugou you had come to know was so far removed from the man in the video- the scary, feral, thoughtless man who seemed to attack someone without just cause.

You closed your eyes for a moment, bringing your hands together in your lap. He said he was trying- he made it very clear that was true with his careful breathing and the way he asked for time to think about his words first. The Bakugou sitting in front of you was not the same man in the video. His eyes weren’t violent erupting volcanoes anymore- they were slowly crystallizing gemstones. Precious, valuable things still slowly changing into something new.

“Okay.” You nod. “I believe you.”

Bakugou cracks open his eyes slowly, looking intensely at you. Something anxious in his eyes melts away, relief filling his features and settling in the barely-there curve of his smile. His shoulders relax and he takes a deep breath and a crackle, a pop and-

“Did you? Was that-” You point at his palms. “Was that your quirk?”

“No! Fuck no, why would you even fuckin’ say that- obviously not, because my quirk is fuckin’ cool not some shitty, embarrassing, tiny-”

“Bakugou.” You interrupt sternly, staring him down. “Honesty, remember?”  

He groans, and flushes. His hand crackles again, something small and dancing just across his palm and Bakugou races to cover it. He then wipes his hands on his hospital gown harshly, turning his entire body toward the window to cover the way he’s still blushing. It doesn’t work though. You see him all the same.

“Yes.” He admits, and he just sounds so defeated, it makes you crack a smile. “But don’t fuckin’ say anything, okay? It’s all your fuckin’ fault, damn woman! Started the first time you called me and I can’t get it to fuckin’ stop no matter what I do it’s-”

“Can I see your hand?”

“H-huh?”

“Your hand,” You reach toward him gently. “I wanna see. Give it.” 

Bakugou doesn’t look at you, just raises his arm and jabs it out toward you. The movement is stunted and awkward, like he can’t control his limbs right, and when you look at him his entire neck has started going red too. He waves his extended hand impatiently, urging you to get on with it.

Slowly, so very slowly, you poke a single finger into the smooth skin of his wrist. Just a feather-light touch. A near-weightless pressure against soft skin.

Pop.

You poke him again.

Pop.

Suddenly embarrassed, you pull both your hands to cover your eyes and blushing cheeks, and begin giggling uncontrollably.

Pop. Pop. Crackle. 

Bakugou moves so brashly that it startles you, and he’s pulling his hand back to him, and curling it into his chest. He’s using his other hand to press into the crackling one, finally smothering the sound of a last few pops sounding off. When you finally peek between your fingers, he’s somehow redder than before. 

He’s adorable and you’re laughing and you can’t stop laughing because he’s shy and embarrassed and so defenseless against you. Every part of you is warm from the top of your head to the burning tips of your toes, your smile spreading so wide that it over takes your entire face. 

“It’s-it’s not fuckin’ funny!” Bakugou shouts. “Stop goddamn laughing, you shitty fuckin’ woman! It’s a good quirk! It’s not fuckin’ funny!” 

“It is.” You agree, gasping to catch your breath. “It’s a very good quirk Bakug-.” 

“K-Katsuki!” He shouts suddenly, interrupting you entirely. He seems surprised at his own outburst, blushing again and smacking his hand against his forehead. He groans. Loudly. “It’s- I- Katsuki. That’s my name.” 

“O-oh. Okay.” You say shakily, heart beginning to race once more. “K-Katsuki, huh?”

Pop. Pop. Pop.

Bakugou screams. Just howls something deep and defeated and animalistic from the bottom of his chest. It fills the room, seemingly taking up all the space, and you could’ve sworn the windows were rattling. You start laughing.

“Fuck! Oh my god! You fucking did this to me, shitty woman! You- you’re- stop fucking laughing!” Bakugou is screaming, arms gesturing wildly. “This isn’t fucking funny! Something is seriously fucking wrong with me! A-and and you don’t even fucking care! You just think it’s funny! I’m fuckin’ broken, fuckin’ suffering, and you’re laughing!”

“It’s- I’m not!” You shakily defend, barely able to complete the words. 

“See now you’re just fuckin’ lyin to me! Goddamn fuckin’ liar for a soulmate!” He’s yelling, hot air and fire and irritation seeping from his lips. “You know, it’s just my fuckin’ luck too, you know! To end up with such a fuckin’ idiot for a soulmate! Who just fuckin’ keeps laughin’ and lookin’ cute an-”

Bakugou screeches. He throws his hands down on the bed, palm up, full-on miniature explosions beginning to spout from his fingertips.

“What the fuck did you do to me? What the fuck- I-I didn’t say that! You didn’t hear anything! Would you quit fuckin’ laughing at me?” 

You just hold your palm up, tears gathering at the corner of your eyes. Bakugou stares at it, burning holes so intensely and brazenly, so utterly focused and enraged that it sends you into further hysterics. It takes you a good five minutes to sober up.

“It’s- I’m not. I’m not laughing at you.” You lean forward in your seat, just a little bit closer to the guardrail of the hospital bed. “You just- you make me happy ‘sall.”

Bakugou gags. Audibly. The sound rips from his chest and up his throat and contorts his face.

“Don’t just fuckin’ say that!”

“What the hell?” You ask incredulously, hands flying wildly. “You literally told me you like me over the phone! Literally yesterday! But now you’ve got a whole ass problem with me saying that you make me happy? What the fuck, angry man?!”

“It’s- I didn’t- fuck!” He shouts, voice raising to cover yours. “Stop makin’ me remember all this embarrassing shit! You’re doing this on fuckin’ purpose! I know you are, shitty woman!” 

“I wouldn’t make you remember it so much it you just fuckin’ owned up to it in the first place, you coward!” You screeched. “If you already said it, and I said I like you, then what’s the big fuckin’ deal, huh?” 

Bakugou suddenly goes quiet, his hands fidgeting with the sheets. He chuckles. “You said you like me. Again. Fuckin’ dork.”

“Oh my god! You’re fucking infuriating! No-no don’t just sit there and fucking grin at me! That’s- stop!” 

And truly, you meant it. You wanted him to stop looking at you like that, stop crinkling up his eyes, and most of all stop smiling because you didn’t think your heart could handle it. Everything about him made your blood boil, and every nerve stand straight on end- but it was good too. So warm and comforting and just funny. 

He was Bakugou and Dynamite and your Soulmate. All in one, awkward, crackling, loud fucking package. 

-//--

ee hav sum fluff ,, as a ~reward~

[outerbankspreferences]

Is It Just Me? - Chase Stokes

Is It Just Me – Chase Stokes

 Word Count: 2893

 MASTERLIST

It's been way too long for me to find it this hard Sitting alone, my fingers picking the sofa apart An attempt to distract from the fact that I miss you I wonder if your friends have had to carry you home And stay for the night because they don't want to leave you alone Way before it was fun, it's becoming an issue

I know it's cruel But I kind of hope you're tortured too

 It had been exactly 3 months and 13 days since you and Chase had broken up. You wished it would have been a shock to you, but you had seen this coming. Things with Chase were great in the beginning. He was caring and sweet towards you. You could remember a time someone had cared for you as he had. You always supported Chase with everything he wanted to do with his life. You met him when he had just started out acting, and you were proud to watch his career blossom to the extent it had.

 But had someone told you 6 months ago that you guys wouldn’t be together anymore you would have denied the accusations. 6 months ago, you thought Chase was in love with you.

 Chase had been going back and forth to North Carolina for auditions and eventually got the leading role in the television series. You spent the first month with him and his new cast mate Rudy, having the time of your lives with the other people on the show. The whole cast would go out to different clubs every weekend enjoying spending time together.

 Just a little over 6 months later you were still going to clubs but this time on separate sides of the country. You couldn’t process what had happened in a healthy manner and instead turned to going out with your friends every weekend to keep your mind off things. It always ended the same, one of your friends dragging you up the stairs of your once shared apartment because you were too drunk to do it yourself. They had grown accustomed to the weekend ritual of getting you sleep wear and a bucket for the morning.

 Then you would wake in the morning, puking the nights content in the bucket popping Advil for the headache and dragging yourself to couch, throwing on some stupid movie that you wouldn’t be able to watch anyways. Instead, you would pick at the loose strings of the sofa thinking of all the times you spent in the apartment with Chase.

 Tell me, does your heart stop at the party when my name drops? Like you're stood at the platform when the trains cross Are you hurting, yeah you must be Or is it just me? Tongue-tied, screaming on the inside When I say that we broke up and they ask why Are you crying in the shower like a freak? Or is it just me?

 As you sit picking away at the sofa, you mind wanders to Chase. You still follow everyone on Instagram, and you were still good friends with Rudy, so you could see everyone’s stories. Rudy had been the only one to keep in touch with you, which surprised you because he and Chase seemed to be such good friends.

 You wondered if Rudy ever asked about you to Chase, and then you wondered what Chase’s reaction would be. Would his heart be in his stomach at every mention of your name, or would he simply shrug like you guys had never been more then distant friends?

 You sat wondering if Chase ever thought back to the day at the airport. The way he let you walk through security with no more then just a side a hug you would give a sibling. Wishing you a good flight and see you later before leaving. He hadn’t even waited for you to board the plane.

 There were so many things you had wanted to say to him. You want to tell him you loved him, that you would fight for him. More so you wanted him to fight for you, for the years you had spent together. To fight for the promises he made to you, the ones you made together and the ones to come. You wanted to apologize for not being enough, but you couldn’t find the right words, so you watched him walk out of your life.

 I heard a rumor you've been spending some time With that blonde girl that you work with and I know she's exactly your type And my miserable mind's running wild with the picture Or are you there by yourself, dialing, redialing my number? And I'm calling your mother, spilling tears on my jumper again The way I am

I know it's cruel But I kind of hope you're tortured too

 1 month later, Chase’s mother, Jennifer, had called you because she had seen the announcement on Instagram. The two of you had been close while dating Chase considering how close he was with her. Your mother lived down south, and you didn’t get to see her that often, so Jennifer was a close second.

 You had heard rumors from Drew and Rudy about Chase and Maddie hanging out together more, and it didn’t come as a shock to you. In the last bit of your relationship, you played second fiddle to her on multiple occasions. “It’s probably nothing, it because they have scenes together.” Rudy would make excuses over facetime when he watched your face drop at the mention of her name. “Yeah, you’re probably right, nothing to get worked up over.” You responded in a less then convincing tone, “she seemed super cool the couple of times I met her.” “Yeah she is. I think under different circumstances the two of you could have been friends.” He encouraged.

 When the nights started to get cold in LA again you found yourself struggling to sleep. It was at these times you would reread old text messages and look through old pictures of the two you. You knew it wasn’t healthy, but you weren’t ready to move on. Chase had extra time to mourn the lose of the relationship while you were still grieving. It was on these cold nights alone in the apartment you shared that you began to wonder if he was thinking about you. Was he sitting next to her thinking about you? Was he wondering whether he should call you or just delete your number?

 Tell me, does your heart stop at the party when my name drops? Like you're stood at the platform when the trains cross Are you hurting, yeah you must be Or is it just me? Tongue-tied, screaming on the inside When I say that we broke up and they ask why Are you crying in the shower like a freak? Or is it just me?

 It was early in the morning in North Carolina and Chase was sitting on the patio of his shared apartment with Rudy. The sun was just starting to rise in the distance as he found himself restless yet again. He had been awake for about an hour just laying in his bed when he finally decided to get up. He was careful not to wake the sleeping girl next to him. She felt different next to him compared to you. When the two of you slept together you always liked to be the big spoon. Chase let you, finding comfort being wrapped up in bed next to you. Maddie was different, she preferred to lay her head on his chest, letting the sound of his beating heart lull her into sleep.

 Not soon after Rudy came on the patio too, and Chase cursed him for being a night owl. “Not tired?” Rudy asked pulling out the bong they kept under the table. “No, and I didn’t want to wake Mads’” Chase spoke up tossing Rudy the lighter next to him watching the blonde inhale the smoke.

 “I can’t stop thinking about her.” Chase finally spoke up, keeping a hushed tone just in case. “Oh yeah?” “I shouldn't have left her like that. It wasn’t fair to her I just didn’t know what to do.” Chase explained and Rudy didn’t need to be a love doctor to know he was talking about you.

 “It’s been 2 weeks, she’s okay.” Rudy explained and Chase gave him a confused look. “When you guys broke up, I stayed in touch with her. She was mine friend too, and I felt bad that we all sort of dropped her when you guys broke up.” Chase nodded his head in understanding but was still jealous that Rudy got to talk to you. “Why did you break up with her? Not that I’m judging, I just thought things were going good between the two of you.”

 It was Chase’s turn to have a hit from the bong while he thought of his answer. “Shit man I don’t know. Things just feel different with Maddie then they did Y/N. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but it did.” “Are you sure you’re not feeling too much as an actor oppose to being a person. Sometimes having a love interest on show can be different and confusing.” The blonde tried explaining to him but even he saw the demise of the relationship before Chase start acting with Madelyn. “Do you think she’ll ever forgive me?” Chase asked looking at Rudy and he could tell by the look in his eyes that it was doubtful. “You hurt her man. I think maybe one day, but not right now. I think right now she’s just trying to figure out how to do this without you.” Rudy could see the few tears in Chase’s eyes, and he knew that this wasn’t easy on him ether.

 Chase got up but before leaving he spoke one more time. “If you talk to her again, just tell her that I never meant to hurt her the way I did.” Chase still wasn’t sleepy but the effects of the marijuana did aid in his problem, so he finished off with a shower. He turned the water to steaming hot and then got in. He let the water soak his hair while he wondered what you were doing right now. It only took a few more minutes for the tears to start. Chase stayed another hour in the shower wondering if he made the right decision.

 'Cause this would be one whole lot easier God, I know that's selfish but it's true If underneath some calm exterior You're all fucked up too

 The first few months of quarantine had been rough on you working from home. You also felt alone all the time but seeing Chase’s Instagram post sent you spiraling down another unhealthy path. You had just started to get better. You weren’t drinking as much, and you had let your friends set you up on a group date. You knew you weren’t ready for another relationship just yet, but you also couldn’t hide in your apartment for the rest of your life.

 You had also been talking to Rudy a lot more. He had been your biggest support through all of this. He had flown back to LA a couple weeks ago to help you move to a new apartment. You figured if you were going to move on you had to move from the place you spent the most time with Chase. It was bittersweet because not only did you have good memories at the home with Chase, but those memories extended to your other friends as well. Rudy had ensured you that you would make knew memories in your new place.

 But when you woke up on June 14, 2020 you almost had a heart attack. It had been 3 months and 13 days to the day, and he had already moved on. Now you were stuck trying to grabble with the emotions you were feeling. In some messed up way at first you didn’t want him to be happy. You wanted him to hurt the way you did, but you knew it wasn’t right. There was a small part of you that was happy that he was now happy.

 Then you were reminded that you owed Chase his half of the damage deposit. Rudy had told you they all moved back to LA and were waiting for season one to come out. You debated on just giving the money to Rudy for him to pass along, but you also wanted to face Chase, to show him that you were now okay even it was a lie.

 You took the latter of the chooses and sent him a text. (Y/N) It’s Y/N, I have your half of the damage deposit from the apartment. I can drop it off or you can pick it up if you want. You stared at the text message for fifteen minutes before sending it. It only took five for him to answer and you dashed to look at the phone. (C) Oh shit I forgot about that. I mean if you want to keep it, that’s fine. You scowled at the text. You didn’t need or want his pity money. (Y/N) I’m fine without it, if your busy I can send it with Rudy the next time he’s here. (C) Okay, no that’s fine I can come by today and get it just air drop me your address. You did just that deciding against messaging him back.

 Chase’s heart fluttered a little when he saw your name come up on his phone. He hadn’t heard from you in months, and he assumed it was going to be about the post on his Instagram. He made the decision that Maddie made him the happy he wanted to be and left you. He had just gotten back in town when you told him about the deposit, and he didn’t mind letting you keep the money. It was the least he could do after everything he put your though. His heart sank when you declined his offer but lite back up when you offered for him to come over.

 Tell me, does your heart stop at the party when my name drops? Like you're stood at the platform when the trains cross Are you hurting, yeah you must be Or is it just me? Tongue-tied, screaming on the inside When I say that we broke up and they ask why Are you crying in the shower like a freak? With only cigarettes for company? Are you crying in the shower like a freak? Or is it just me?

 He honestly thought of this as his chance to apologize for everything that happened. You didn’t deserve for him to treat you like that, and he owed you an explanation. He drove over to your house, white knuckled the whole way. You lived in a small, gated apartment building and he remembered Rudy telling Maddie B. about it. He remembered Rudy saying how excited you were for a new place, and he wasn’t sure if Rudy was just saying that to upset him. Every time Rudy mentioned something about you it always made his heart sink underground and he was reminded about the way he treated you.

 Chase started to walk up the stairs to your apartment once you buzzed him in but to his surprise you were waiting outside on the step. You looked tired and had lost weight which worried him because you were small to begin with. “Hey.” He spoke not really knowing what else to say. “Hi.” You said and he could hear how sore your voice sounded almost like you had been crying. You were smoking, which was something new, but he figured this was just as stressful for you as it was him You handed him an envelope with his name on it. “Uh, I cleaned the whole apartment, and nothing was broken so we could all the money back. Your half is in there, so I just need your key to give to the landlord.” You explained looking at Chase. He pulled his keys from his pocket fumbling with the ring.

 “Y’know, I never meant”- “Please don’t” “Please don’t want?” Chase looked at you confused. He thought you wanted an apology. “I can’t listen to it Chase. I know it’s mean, but I’m not ready to hear you apologize. I’m just starting to get better, and I don’t need you to set me back again.” You explained looking him the eyes. He flinched when you said again. He handed the key back to you. “Thanks, I hope everything works out. I’ll make sure to watch the show.” You smiled at him and he didn’t realize how much he missed seeing you smile. He returned the smile before turning on his heels to leave. “For the record Y/N, you weren’t the only one to get hurt in this.” And it was your turn to flinch at his words. “I guess grief looks better on some people.” And with that you escaped back into your apartment sliding down the door letting out a silent cry. What you didn’t know was that Chase was going back to his car to the same thing.

TAGLIST:

@drewstarkeysbitchh @taylathornton @jjmaybankzz @lemur46

[stomp-that-ho-regard]

Retcon

noun

(in a film, television series, or other fictional work) a piece of new information that imposes a different interpretation on previously described events, typically used to facilitate a dramatic plot shift or account for an inconsistency.

verb

revise (an aspect of a fictional work) retrospectively, typically by introducing a piece of new information that imposes a different interpretation on previously described events.

Retroactive Continuity

Reframing past events to serve a current plot need. [...] In its most basic form, this is any plot point that was not intended from the beginning. [...]

Post-hiatus C2, and the Great Retcon... 

(The retconning really started with the playlists, but we’ll come back to those.)

First, some context:

SDCC (July ‘18) - Marisha was asked directly about Beau and Yasha and if she and Ashley had discussed it. “After the first few times that I kinda put the moves on her, we were at break, and I could sense that Ashley was wanting to ask me something. And she was like, ‘Hey, I’m just curious... is Beau- ’ And at that exact moment someone’s like, ‘Yo Ashley! We gotta go! We gotta get on stage!’ And I was like, ‘Bye!’” Then Brian asked, “And you haven’t had a further conversation about it?” Marisha said, “Nope!”

(Seven months into the campaign, and no discussions. Hmm.)

NYCC (Oct. ‘18) - Marisha was asked about who would Beau get flustered over if they ever flirted back, and yes, she said Yasha and laughed, but then said, “It’s like throwing pebbles at a brick wall.” Meaning, she was putting stuff out there and not getting anything back. (And, she really wasn’t. I still remember when a major portion of the fandom, including the diehard shippers [of which I was one at the time], weren’t sure if Ashley was even interested in this. More than that, it wasn’t until the Zuala reveal, that the fandom and the players found out for certain that Yasha was actually into women.) 

(To me, Marisha’s answer here also suggests that at this point, there were still no discussions.)

Talks Machina for ep61 (May ‘19) - Marisha was asked ‘What was going through Beau's mind when Yasha revealed her past with Zuala? Has this changed any feelings Beau might have? Or has Beau's character growth allowed her to mature a little more with regards to her feelings about Yasha?’ Which Marisha instantly pegged as a shipping question. And she said, “I’m trying to figure out a way to answer this to not ruin everyone’s internal canon, in their brains. I don’t want people to overestimate Beau’s intentions towards Yasha. But then also, is that on me? Have I been leading everybody on?”

So, you had all of that, all the way up to ep61.

None of this indicates that ‘it’s been happening since ep1′ or that it’s ‘the slowest of slow burns.’ In fact, it shuts that down completely.

Moving forward to the Beau and Fjord convo (ep108)...

Marisha suddenly having Beau say “There was something about Yasha from the moment that I saw her”. She’s retrospectively attempting to give that moment more weight, when (based on the examples above) we know that the over-the-top flirting was just for fun. And truthfully, she really wasn’t flirting with Yasha any differently than she was flirting with any hot female NPC the party crossed paths with.

And now it’s clear that that one line she said is the reason why BY shippers have suddenly clung on to the idea that “It’s been happening since episode one! SLOooOowBuUuuUrn!!!!!” when its clear that it was not planned. (Not before the hiatus-from-hell, anyway.)

Then Marisha having Beau go from describing Jester as “She's fun. She makes me laugh. I like her ridiculous plans. I think she's complicated and layered.” to “It’s easy to lust after her”. I’ll direct you to Talks for ep85. After Marisha had mentioned that it was a bunch of little things that build, and then pinpointed a few of them, Brian tried to make a joke and said “So you’re saying it’s been more a series, than just one moment that you can point to and say ‘It was right here when I went, let’s fuck!’” Marisha specifically countered that with “It’s not even about 'let’s fuck’. It’s nothing sexual in this case.” (Having her backpedal on this so heavily was such a huge gut punch and was the thing that wholly soured everything for me.)

There were so many better, more delicate ways Marisha could’ve had Beau examine/come to grips with her feelings for both women, but all the reduction and saying they were ‘transferable’ was nothing short of insulting.

On that same Talks episode, Marisha also said this: “Going into this campaign all of us were like, ‘No relationships!’ I didn’t want it! I didn’t ask for this!”, while smiling. What this shows me is that she was thinking of a relationship in regards to Beau’s feelings for Jester. As if she was maybe even anticipating this culminating into something? Why even mention relationships at all if this was nothing serious and was always meant to fall by the wayside?

Brian then followed up with, “In my opinion, as a viewer, Beau’s someone who seems to be on the search for innocence. Whether innocence lost or just innocence in general. And to me it makes sense that you would be attracted to someone who exudes genuine and sort of intrinsic innocence.” Marisha replied with “Fairly astute.”

The next question was, ‘Beau has taken a pretty casual, no-strings-attached approach toward sex and relationships so far. How do her feelings for Jester compare to her previous romantic flings?’ Marisha answered immediately and very seriously with, “Noncomparable. It’s more than that.” She wasn’t playing coy and it didn’t take her a century to find the words. She didn’t even have to think about it. Succinct and direct.

How did all of that ‘organically’ disappear completely, after only 14 episodes?

(Everything felt more genuine back then, because it seemed like Marisha was going where the character was taking her, and not where she thought the character should be going.)

Post-hiatus, everyone and their mother are acting like BY is some epic romance-of-the-ages that was all mapped out, and like Beau having feelings for Jester was just some sort of temporary curveball. That Beau was confused, or was just missing Yasha and projected onto Jester. 

That’s really fucked up no matter how you try to justify it. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen another piece of media backpedal this hard, and this callously.

None of that squares with what we were shown or with what we were told. Until, everybody made a hard pivot and now they've done (and continue to) do everything they can to rewrite campaign history, even though we have plenty of footage that contradicts the new ‘company line’.

Now, where the retconning truly began, with the playlists...

Remember the first round of playlists? Those were released randomly, whenever the cast felt like posting them. I also don’t remember there being announcements every time one came out either.

This time though, they had a fixed schedule, complete with official twitter announcements. As they started to just get back into the swing of things, Yasha’s playlist was released right after the first episode back.

So, right out of the gate, they had to make sure they started to drill home a certain mindset for viewers. That’s why Yasha had a song called ‘Let Me Hold You’. (Lo and behold, a few episodes in, Beau randomly asks Yasha to hold her.)  A few weeks later, Beau’s playlist was released, and there was a song with the caption saying ‘Ultimately, all she really wants is someone to hold, and someone to hold her’. (But sure, no planning here! The wording is just a total coincidence, folks!)  

The other song, directly about Yasha, mentions ‘a crush forged in battle’ (ok), and ‘awkward flirtations’ (???). Yasha never openly flirted with Beau before the hiatus, until maybe right after the Obann arc, in a very vague way.

On Beau’s playlist, there’s nothing about Jester. The one track that mentions her is actually about Artagan. Which, after all they’ve been through together, is fucking ridiculous no matter how you slice it.

In addition to that, Marisha had made Beau’s time in Kamordah (ep92/e93), and the incidents with her family and the Hag, about the group now, not about Jester, fully contradicting her own reiterated words that ‘Jester saved Beau’.

When Beau was talking to her dad, reverting back to her old self and getting all riled up, Jester helped her in that moment, and saved her. Yes, the group was very supportive, and yes, Yasha said something to him before they left the house (that Beau was out of earshot for by the way), but Jester was Beau’s rock throughout that whole thing. 

With the Hag, when the group was having a hard time coming up with a solution, and they realized they might actually lose Beau, Jester stepped up and took control of the situation. She, single-handedly, saved Beau/the group from the Hag. And with that, Jester also became Beau’s hero.

In both instances, Marisha thanked Laura/Jester. First on Talks for ep92 with both of them on it. She reiterated, “You saved me. You saved Beau.” Then on Twitter after ep93 with, “Still processing last night. Saved by a cupcake? Eh - saved by @LauraBaileyVO ... again.” 

But now suddenly, it’s the group. Just the group? 

Now, don’t get me wrong. The entire party showing Beau support was incredibly important. The M9 showed her that they value her, that she’s important to them. It solidified the theme of ‘found family’, which was beautiful. But, to not also highlight how crucial Jester was in all of this, after making such a big deal about it? 

That is very deliberate retconning of some hugely important, highly emotional moments for Beau that directly involved Jester.

Any of Beau’s organic and genuine connection with Jester (which encompasses their deep friendship as well as Beau’s romantic feelings) has been massively reduced (and now erased), specifically to prop up a supposed ‘deep’ connection with someone else that was barely ever there, is still barely there, and has no actual depth at all.

Case in point, the BY date (ep126) showcased this fact to the most extreme degree...

Yasha’s infamous line: “I fell in love with you in Kamordah.” So, Yasha literally watched Beau relive her childhood trauma, and caught feelings during it. I’m not wrong in thinking that that’s just a little disturbing, am I? Also, if that’s the moment she supposedly fell for her, why did she not offer her any form of help? I mean, besides that one sweet moment with TJ, the entire time Beau was in Kamordah, she was the most broken down she’d ever been and needed some real comfort, which is something Yasha did not give her. (Jester did though. In spades.)

So, on multiple levels, this seems highly out-of-place. 

Several people have said that that line was not thought through. In my opinion, it actually was thought through and was only said specifically to have viewers completely dismiss everything else that happened in the Kamordah episodes. Despite the FACT that Beau and Yasha barely interacted during those episodes, they have now stripped down the party’s experience there, and twisted it into a giant BY shipping moment. (Further feeding into the retcon.)

Their ‘trip down memory lane’ was laughable. Most of the things that were mentioned, Yasha wasn’t even around for. 

Gee, remember when the cast was actually good at separating what they knew from what their character knew? When you start injecting what you know into your character (who isn’t supposed to know, because they literally were not physically there), you are metagaming. 

The entire date was one big metagaming bonanza. And it had to be, or else they would’ve had nothing to talk about. There is not one thing they have to call their own. To people who don’t have BY tunnel vision, it was made glaringly obvious that they have nothing in common and their dynamic is fairly shallow. Meanwhile, the rest of the cast are sitting there watching this unfold, smiling and nodding along as if it all makes perfect sense and isn’t utterly ridiculous. (And I’m sitting here wondering when I got shunted into the Twilight Zone.)

The shallowness holds true for FJ as well. Aside from both of them being from the Menagerie Coast, what exactly do they have in common?

While Fjord has grown as a character, as far as Jester goes, he still does not seem to have the capacity to fully understand her as a person, or fully respect her abilities/emotional strength/intelligence. He doubted her often, which led to Jester getting irritated with him several times over the course of at least the last third of the pre-hiatus episodes. He even continued to doubt her judgment (in regards to the Traveler) in the post-hiatus Rumblecusp episodes. But hey, they’ve kissed now (ep118) so all of that gets wiped clean, and he’s being touted as her ultimate romantic soulmate who’s oh-so-perfect for her.

For fuck’s sake, why does that sound like something pulled right out of a CW show?

(I'm convinced that the only reason FJ is ‘popular’ is because the shippers have projected Travis and Laura’s real-life marriage onto the characters. If Fjord and Jester were played by different people, or Travis and Laura were not together, people would realize how paper-thin and half-assed this pairing is and hardly anyone would care about it.) 

Beau and Jester had developed the deepest, most genuine friendship and overall dynamic in the entire party, that should have absolutely been given the chance to be explored further. They constructed a pretty solid foundation that could have easily been built upon, and the fact that it’s been unceremoniously pulverized and snuffed out in favor of such overwhelming tepidity and flavorlessness will never not infuriate me.

Finally, to finish this off, I will say with my whole chest, that that is one of many nasty, rotten patterns that I’ve seen far too much of in all kinds of scripted media, which is...

Not wanting to commit to the thing that’s actually growing organically, because it’ll ruffle too many feathers. It’s too inconvenient. It gets in the way. Because of course, nobody wants to do that. Nobody wants to take a risk, or you know, actually follow where the natural fucking chemistry is taking you. Of course not! Heaven forbid, we go down a different road! You have to go with what’s ‘expected’, no matter what, at the great expense of something new that’s come along that’s clearly better. Even when what’s expected is hollow as fuck and doesn’t make sense anymore, because characters have grown and dynamics have changed, they decide to dig their heels in with the most fanservice-y options instead.

Yet this is UNSCRIPTED media. A D&D campaign, that’s supposed to be mostly improvised. D&D, that’s all about taking chances/going with your gut/making bold choices/etc., from people who have claimed up and down that they “like to see things play out at the table”.

So why are those same disingenuous patterns being utilized here too?

One of the big reasons I got into CR was because I naively believed that because the format was different, that the storytelling would be different. I thought I wouldn’t have to worry about running into this nonsense here. That I wouldn’t have to worry about getting bullshitted, jerked around, and having my intelligence insulted left and right, but alas, here we are.

In conclusion...  [TL;DR, kinda?]

Reframing past events (between B & J, and B & Y) to serve a current plot need (railroading BY):                                                                                      

Beau playlist ignores Jester’s importance to what transpired in Kamordah. (minimizing/erasure)

Beau playlist doesn’t acknowledge/hint at Beau’s feelings for Jester. (total erasure. could have at least included a song about feelings being lost, or being confused about feelings for a friend, but Marisha took the cowardly route, and didn’t bother mentioning it at all.)

Beau playlist claims that Beau and Yasha have both been flirting forever. (easily debunked by session footage.)

In her conversation with Fjord, Beau says, “There was something about Yasha from the moment I saw her”. (it was just about hooking up then, and stayed that way for a majority of the campaign. This line suggests that Beau has had ‘deeper feelings’ for and/or has been ‘in love’ with Yasha since the first episode, that this was all intentional build-up, which again, is easily debunked by session footage, panels, and TM.)

In her conversation with Fjord, Beau says, “It’s easy to lust after her.” (minimizing/erasure/twisting of Beau’s feelings for Jester, which Marisha had previously stated were ‘noncomparable’ , ‘more than that’, and that her attraction is ‘nothing sexual in this case.’)

This isn’t a fucking conspiracy theory. This is plain evidence of a planned retcon.

[p0cketw0tch]

The Affection of Vampires

They came for us one day, fifteen humans, all strangers, all taken to play in their annual “family game night”

We would play their games-some competitive, some cooperative-and then, at dawn, we would be free to go home, never to be bothered by any of their kind again. 

Those that survived at least.

It wasn’t even malicious, the deaths and maiming. Some were simply uncaring casualties of the games, some accidents. They were strong and fast and they simply did not care enough to play carefully with their new toys.

The whole thing was almost farcical, a parody of gore and those games played at company picnics. Activities put together with supernatural powers and crafts bought from the dollar store. There was nothing elegant or mysterious about these vampires, they were more like sociopathic children, squabbling and goofing around. Viewed from the outside, as a TV show or a movie, the whole thing might have been a comedy.

It wasn’t funny from the inside

I’m not sure what prompted me to talk to Marie. Maybe it was rash curiosity, maybe  it was desperate attempt at integrating myself to one of our captors. They were happier when we forced smiles and pretended to have fun.

She seemed a bit sadder than the other three. Lonely, even. Nikolai swanned about, delighting in showing off in front of his temporary human pets and Pierre and Ana were wrapped up in each other. Marie was quiet and that made her almost approachable.

I've always been good at bonding with new people. Between games and bodies I talked to her like she was someone I wanted to get to know, and slowly she opened up. We spoke of our favorite books, of art, of dreams and fears. We both liked comics and sci-fi. She liked to paint and I liked to sketch. She worried she'd never find a bond like Pierre and Ana had, and I admitted that sometimes I wondered if I felt love the same way as other people. Under different circumstances, I would have actually liked her, would have wanted to be friends.

Beneath the horror and fear, I think I did like her. The human mind is bendy that way.

There were eight of us left alive by the time the sky began to lighten. Marie came up to me and took my hand, smiling brighter than I'd ever seen. Nikolai had an announcement, she said, and she tugged me gently over to the group.

Nikolai was smiling broadly, puffing his chest as he floated above a makeshift cardboard pulpit. This had been the best family game night they had had in decades, he said. Traditionally, a new group of humans was chosen each time, fresh blood, as it were. But it would be a shame to lose such a delightful group as us. We would be 'invited' again next year, along with the new faces chosen to fill out our numbers. And perhaps, he added, casting an indulgent look at Marie and I. Some of us could even spend time together before then.

What could we do but choke back sobs and feign enthusiasm? They said we could go back home, but any one of them could slaughter us all in a tantrum if they thought we didn't return their regard. I turned to Marie, still holding my hand, and saw both joy and anxious hope in her oddly bright eyes. There was no backing out. I smiled back with as much sincerity as I could muster.

The affection of vampires is a dangerous thing.

This was a dream I had two nights ago. As a piece of original fiction, its rather cliche. As a dream, it’s surprisingly narratively coherent (although I’ve always had rather vivid and cohesive dreams). I woke up afterwards with the line “the affection of vampires is a dangerous thing” on my lips and ABBA’s Lay All Your Love On Me playing in my head. It seemed rather Halloween appropriate, so I thought I’d type it up

[discoscoob]

Love’s Labours Won | Loki x Female Reader

Loki (Marvel) x Doctor Who

The TARDIS arrives in The Dark Ages where the Doctor tries to solve a mystery involving witchcraft. During your stay your relationship with Loki begins to develop due to a mix of a Shakespeare, jealousy and one bed.

Part Three | Part Five | Chapter Index

Words: 7.7k

Warnings: unwanted advances, mild homophobia, death: very minor characters, jealous Loki, swearing, angst, fluff and then more angst

Read on AO3

You were sat crossed legged in front of your floor length mirror, applying eyeliner when the whole room began jerking, which caused your hand to slip and left a long black line smudged over or eyelid. 

 You huffed in annoyance, as you pulled out a makeup wipe and began cleaning up the mistake, you decided that there was no point in attempting to try again as the whole TARDIS continued to quiver. 

 You climbed to your feet, still wiping your eye, as you stormed out of your bedroom with half your sight blocked by your makeup wipe. You failed to see Loki walking down the corridor at the exact same time and with the help of the turbulence, Loki lost his balance and stumbled into you, sending you both crashing into the wall.

 “Good morning.” You greeted Loki, almost sounding out of breath from the shock of your back impacting with the wall. His face was mere inches from yours, as you were trapped against the wall between both his arms, unlike the last time you found yourself in this position with the God, it was purely accidental this time.

 From the proximity you realised that today a light citrusy and floral scent surrounded him and from what you could see, he was wearing a solid black suit with a matching shirt and tie. The outfit made him appear even more powerful and intimidating than he usually did and despite the fact you were meant to be trying to push away any desires you had towards the God, your mind was encouraging you to just lean forward those last few inches and close the gaps between your lips.

 Before you could follow your own minds advice, Loki awkwardly cleared his throat as he took a step back away from you, while straightening out his suit jacket.

 “Good morning.” He repeated.

 You both continued your way towards the control room, occasionally bracing yourself against the walls whenever you felt as though you were about to lose balance. 

 “Did you have to pass a test to fly this thing?” You asked the Doctor, who was literally sprawled across the console, with his foot pushing a leaver, while his arm stretched out to the opposite side to turn a dial.

 Donna was clinging onto the rail for dear life, while you and Loki attempted to reach her side without falling flat on your backsides.

 “Yes, and I failed.” The Doctor distractedly answered. 

 “I can tell.” You replied, as the TARDIS jerked to an abrupt stop, you instinctively grabbed onto Loki’s arm to steady yourself and he put his own hand under your elbow to ensure you were stable.

 Behind Loki’s shoulder you saw Donna watching you and the God closely, you could tell that she still didn’t trust Loki. Feeling conscious of her stare you mumbled a quick thanks towards Loki before you extended the distance between the two of you, while the Doctor ran to the doors of the TARDIS.

 “Beyond this door lies a brave new world.” He announced with his back against the TARDIS doors, enthusiastic as ever.

 “I’m up for anything, as long as there aren’t any volcano’s and none of us get possessed.” Donna seemed happily pleased.

 “Oh Donna, the chances of that are low but never zero.” The Doctor cheekily smiled, before he turned on his heel causing the tail of his long brown trench coat to fan out behind him as he ran out the door. “Come on!” 

 When you stepped out of the TARDIS behind Donna, the first thing you noticed was that it was night but still humid, leading you to believe it was summertime and you noticed that you were surrounded by other humans which lead you to the conclusion that you were still on Earth. 

 The sound of horses hooves clicking against the cobblestone of the lively street, the attire of the people who occupied it and the medieval architecture of the buildings which aligned it all informed you that you had travelled backwards in time. 

 If you required further more indication, the foul waste which came pouring from the sky, barely missing you before Loki pulled you back, was the final confirmation you needed. You could hardly hold back the gag that threatened to rise at the back of your throat.

 “We’ve arrived somewhere before the invention of the toilet. Good to know.” The Doctor commented.

 “Listen, I’m all for time travel yeah, but that’s disgusting. I’m gonna nip to the loo on the TARDIS before we explore, I don’t wanna end up shitting in a bucket.” Donna announced before she retreated back inside the blue box, the door squeaked shut behind her.

 “I always knew you were a primitive species but that is truly a testament to how far you have come in your short lives, it is positively awe-inspiring.” Loki remarked and you glanced at him with narrowed eyes, as you tried to decipher whether to be offended or take it as a compliment. 

 “So, this is London?” You eventually asked the Doctor, while you all waited for your auntie outside the TARDIS.

 “Think so,” the Doctor let his eyes wander over the street, “round about, ooh... 1599. If I’m right, we’re just down the river, by Southwark, right next to the Globe Theatre, brand new, just opened! Though strictly speaking, it’s not a globe, it’s a tetradecagon, because of its 14 sides.” 

 “What’s that?” Donna asked, after stepping back outside the TARDIS, having caught just the end of the Doctors sentence.

 “I was just saying, the Globe Theatre isn’t technically a globe, it’s a tetradecagon, it has 14 sides.” The Doctor repeated to Donna, who pulled a face.

 “You’re always so pedantic,” Donna shook her head. “Why would they ever call it the Tetra-thingy Theatre?” 

 “Tetradecagon.” The Doctor corrected.

 “See, pedantic.” Donna pointed out, and the Doctor looked insulted.

 “As I was saying,” the Doctor returned to his original point while he glared at Donna, “the man himself should be there tonight.”

 “Shakespeare?” Loki’s interest peaked.

 “You know who Shakespeare is?” Your eyebrows lifted with surprise as you turned to Loki.

 “Believe it or not, unlike everyone on Earth, we aren’t sheltered on Asgard. What can you tell me of the Nine Realms?” Loki paused to give you a chance to answer, but your lips remained sealed as your eyes bounced around in thought. “That’s what I thought.” 

  ***

 The Doctor had lead the way to the Globe Theatre and managed to sneak all four of you inside with the use a wallet, containing a blank piece of paper, which he had explained was called psychic paper. It allowed the person who looked upon it, to see whatever the Doctor presented it as, when he had said it was tickets to the performance you were let in without any bother.

 Inside the theatre was filled to the brim, the four of you were cramped near the back of the stalls. The smell wasn’t particularly pleasant, unfortunately deodorant and other essential hygiene products weren’t invented yet but since you were stood by Loki’s side his delicious and fresh scent performed as a buffer over the foul odour and you found yourself almost snuggling into his chest as the play went on.

 Once all the cast were bowing at the end of the performance, the crowd began chanting ‘author’ commanding that Shakespeare himself make an appearance on stage.

 With his arms raised above his head and a flamboyant skip, William Shakespeare entered the stage and the cheers, whistles and applause grew even louder. He blew kisses toward the crowd, as he confidently walked back and forth across the stage, occasionally he leant down to brush the hands of the audience members below, who desperately reached out their arms in the hopes they might get to touch the renowned poet.

 In the flesh, Shakespeare appeared to be a lot more attractive than any of his portraits ever suggested. He had a head full of wavy golden brown locks and a beard to match. 

 “He’s a bit different to his portraits.” You commented to no one in particular, as you continued to enthusiastically clap along with everyone else.

 “Genius. He’s a genius. The genius, the most human human there’s ever been. And now we’re gonna hear him speak! Always, he chooses the best words, new beautiful, brilliant words...” The Doctor excitedly spoke.

 “He is one of the finer Midgardian poets. I have read most of his work, he is truly gifted with his language.” Loki added.

 “Shut ya big fat mouths!” Shakespeare merrily exclaimed to his audience, who erupted into laughter, while the Doctors and Loki’s faces fell with disappointment and they halted their applause. 

 “Oh Gods, he sounds just like my brother after one too many.” Loki realised with alarm.

 “I know what you’re all saying, Love’s Labours Lost, that’s a funny ending, isn’t it? It just stops!” Shakespeare clicked his fingers to put emphasis on the abrupt ending. “Will the boys get the girls? Well, don’t get your hose in a tangle, you’ll find out soon.”

 “When?” The audience eagerly chanted.

 “All in good time, you don’t rush a genius.” The poet lowered himself into an elegant bow before he abruptly shot back up again. 

 “When?” Shakespeare repeated his audiences question. “Tomorrow night!”

 The theatre erupted into raucous applause.

 “The premier of my brand new play! A sequel, no less! And I call it Love’s Labours Won!” You and Donna continued clapping, oblivious to the suspicious glance the Doctor and Loki shared with one another over your heads.

 ***

 “I can’t say I have ever heard of Love’s Labours Won.” Donna announced, as you were exiting the theatre, still huddled in a large crowd.

 “Me neither, is it one of his more obscure works?” You looked over your shoulder to inquire with the Doctor, who easily stood a whole head and shoulders above the crowd surrounding you, as did Loki, who was walking beside you.

 “Well, the thing is, it doesn’t exist, only in rumours. It’s mentioned lists of his plays, but never, ever turns up and no one knows why.” The Doctor explained, adding a tone of mystery to his voice as he quirked his expressive eyebrows.

 Your interest peaked almost instantly, you noticed Donna’s had too as you both shared an inquisitive look, eager to discover more about this missing play.

 “But how did it disappear in the first place?” Donna asked.

 “Well... I suppose we could stay a bit longer and find out.” The Doctor suggested, to which you and Donna shared excited smiles. 

 ***

 You collectively made the decision to spend the night in one of the inns, to not only get the full experience but the Doctor knew of which one Shakespeare occupied, this allowed him the opportunity to keep a vigilant eye on the poet, in the hopes of discovering what caused the disappearance of Love’s Labours Won.

 “Hello! Excuse me, not interrupting, am I?” The Doctor asked as he knocked on the side of the doorway, “Mr Shakespeare, isn’t it?” 

 You followed into the room behind the Doctor with Loki close behind you and Donna entering last, to find the famous writer lounging at a desk as he drank from a tin cup, with two of the actors from his play sat in front of him.

 “Oh, no. No, no, no, who let you in?” Shakespeare pinched the bridge of his nose. “No autographs. You can’t be sketched with me and please don’t ask where I get my ideas. Thanks for the interest. Now be a good boy and shove...”

 Shakespeare finally removed his fingers from the bridge of his nose and raised his hand into a shoo motion, but as he lifted his eyes to look at the Doctor they instead landed on you and his words died on his tongue. 

 “Hey nonny, nonny,” the playwright addressed you, as he suddenly sat up straight and gestured to the seat beside him. “Sit right down here next to me.” 

 Your eyes slightly widened at the interest Shakespeare displayed in you, while behind you no one noticed the way Loki had begun looking upon the poet with a shadow cast over his eyes. The innkeeper entered the room and placed her hands on the shoulders of the two actors, who were sat before Shakespeare.

 “Come on, lads, I think our William’s found his new muse.” She encouraged them to make themselves scarce, while Shakespeare rose from his seat.

 “Sweet lady,” he continued to address you as he beckoned you over to the chair one of the actors previously occupied, you politely smiled at him as you lowered yourself into the chair and he sank back into his own. 

 The Doctor sat down in the chair beside you and Donna sat on his other side, so he was sandwiched between the two of you, while Loki lingered in the back, where no one could notice the way his gaze menacingly lingered on Shakespeare.

 “I’m Sir Doctor of TARDIS and these are my companions,” the Doctor listed off your names, as he held up his wallet containing the psychic paper, which he had used to enter the Globe Theatre with, in front of William.

 “Interesting. That bit of paper, it’s blank.” Shakespeare pointed out, it appeared he was immune to the papers psychic powers.

 “Oh, that’s... very clever.” The Doctor raised his eyebrows as he let his hand holding the wallet fall limp. “That proves it. Absolute genius.”

 “Who are you, exactly?” William rested his elbow on the table and leaned forward as propped his cheek upon his fist, while he returned his attention to you. “More to the point who is your delicious lady?” 

 Donna raised her eyebrows as she looked between you and the poet. “She’s my niece.” Your auntie stated, capturing the writers attention.

 “Your niece is very captivating.” Shakespeare informed your auntie.

 “And you’re very married.” Donna countered, clearly disapproving of his flirtatious manner towards you.

 Near the back of the room, Loki’s lips lifted in a proud smile as he watched Donna shut down Shakespeare.

 “Excuse me! Hold hard a moment!” A large, heavy and bearded man, wearing a pleated collar, black robes and an elaborate gold necklace which rested over his shoulders, invited himself into the room and grabbed everyone’s attention.

 “This is absolutely abominable behaviour, a new play, with no warning! I demand to see a script, Mr Shakespeare. As Master of the Revels, every new script must be registered at my office and examined by me, before it can be performed!” He lectured the playwright, who stroked his beard in an idle manner.

 “Tomorrow morning, first thing, I’ll send it round.” The experienced writer calmly answered. 

 “I don’t work to your schedule, you work to mine! The script, now!” The man demanded. 

 “I can’t!” Shakespeare finally raised his voice.

 “Then tomorrow’s performance is cancelled. Love’s Labours Won will never be played.” The man concluded, before showing himself out the room.

 “I guess that answers our questions about Love’s Labours Won. I thought it was going to be a bit more exciting than that. It usually is with you, Doctor.” Donna sighed disappointedly.

 Almost as if on cue, the shrill sound of a woman’s scream was heard from the street outside and you all stood to attention.

 “Sounds like I spoke to soon.” Donna remarked, before the Doctor sprung from his chair and dashed out the room with the rest of you following on his tail, including Shakespeare.

 Once you were all out on the street, you saw the man who had declared the cancellation of Love’s Labours Won, stumbling around and clutching at his neck as he repeatedly threw up what appeared to be water. 

 “Leave it to me, I’m a doctor.” The Doctor announced, as he rushed to the man’s aid, although he barely reached him before the man collapsed to the floor with a choked groan of pain, as water continued to pour out his mouth. 

 The man lay motionless on the straw covered cobblestone street and it appeared to be too late for the Doctor to do anything as he checked his pulse with a grim expression.

 The Doctor stood to his feet to address the innkeeper, who had come out to witness the commotion.

 “Good mistress, this poor fellow has died from a sudden imbalance of the humours. A natural, if unfortunate demise. Call a constable, have him taken away.” The Doctor instructed her, before he crouched back down by the body. 

 You followed Donna as she joined the Doctors side, you knelt on the opposite side of the body across from Donna and the Doctor and Loki settled beside you. 

 “What actually happened to him?” Donna whispered to the Doctor, understanding that what he had told the innkeeper was a lie.

 “If I’m not mistaken, it looks like witchcraft.” The Doctor suspected, his tone deadly serious.

 “Before anyone points their finger at me, I’m not a witch. I’m a sorcerer, there is a difference.” Loki proclaimed his innocence.

 “No one is blaming you.” You assured him.

 “I’m usually the first suspect when something goes wrong.” Loki explained, with a small laugh to keep it light but you still frowned, imagining how frustrating it must be to constantly be seen as the black sheep. 

 ***

 You all solemnly returned to the inn, the unexpected death of the man who had wanted to cancel Love’s Labours Won, had inspired the Doctor to stay in order to get to the bottom of it. 

 The innkeeper had accommodated the four of you with the last two unoccupied rooms of the inn, however almost looked ready to kick you all out onto the streets when Donna had suggested the Doctor and Loki take one room, while she and you take the other.

 “Two men will not lie together under my roof.” She muttered ever so quietly, as if it were far too scandalous to be said out loud.

 “The dark ages.” The Doctor sighed, while he dragged his palm down his face. “Miss Noble likes to jest,” he assured the innkeeper, who eyed the four of you suspiciously before reluctantly leaving. 

 “I broke that rule a long time ago.” Shakespeare spoke through a chuckle.

 “Oh, 57 academics just punched the air.” The Doctor muttered to himself, causing you to let out a small snort of laughter.

 ***

 Due to the innkeepers rules surrounding sleeping arrangements, this resulted in the Doctor and Donna sharing one room, while you and Loki shared the other, the rooms were situated on opposite sides of the inn.

 You and Loki stared at the double bed, both wondering who was going to be the first to break the silence. Inside your mind you were freaking out, but you didn’t let it show on your exterior, you were meant to be trying to forget these thoughts about Loki which occupied your mind, sharing a bed with him for the night would only make it worse.

 The God wordless walked further into the room, the floor loudly creaked beneath each step he took, as did the mattress once he lowered himself onto it in a sitting position, with his back turned to you. 

 He removed his tie and hung it around the post at the bottom of the bed, followed by his suit jacket and then his shoes, your heartbeat was rising with every item of clothing he removed wondering how much further he would go, but luckily he stopped there rested back onto the bed, with his pillows propped against the headboard.

 “Are you going to stand there all night?” Loki casually commented, noticing you hadn’t moved an inch since entering the room.

 You swallowed and softly moved towards the bed, noticing the floor boards didn’t creak as loudly beneath your feet and once you sat on your side of the bed, with your back turned to Loki, you copied his previous movements and began removing your shoes.

 “Shakespeare seems fond of you.” Loki remarked, as he picked at some loose thread on the blanket beneath him and you paused your actions. Maybe you were imagining it, but you could sense a certain edge to his voice that made you believe that he wasn’t only making casual conversation. 

 “Those are words I never imagined would be said towards me.” You lightly chuckled, as you resumed your movements, before you slowly shuffled up the bed to lie beside Loki.

 “It must feel nice to capture the attention of such a renowned figure of your realm.” Loki continued, and you wished instead that you could’ve captured the God’s attention in the same way.

 “I suppose,” you shrugged, despite the fact that you could admit the man was far more attractive in person than he is depicted in any of his portraits, his attempts at flirting with you hadn’t so much made you swoon but rather made you feel awkward.

 “He reminds me of my brother, you would like him.” Loki told you. “The same golden hair, the same confidence-”

 “He’s not really my type.” You quickly admitted, causing Loki to pause for a moment.

 Without looking you could tell Loki had turned on his side towards you, as you felt the uncomfortable mattress shift beneath your back. He had propped his head up on his elbow, while his other arm rested on the dip of his waist.

 “What would you describe ‘your type’ as?” Loki curiously inquired.

 You. You answered in your mind, while your lips remained sealed as you pretend to be giving it some thought while you focused on nervously fidgeting with your fingers over your stomach. 

 Eventually you lifted your eyes to Loki, his were already unapologetically focused on you. As you silently watched him from under your lashes, you willed him to read your mind from your stare alone and from the way his eyes darted over your face, you could tell he was trying.

 The candlelight which luminated the room, cause his eyelashes to cast shadows over his defined cheeks when his gaze paused on your lips for a moment too long, he drew his own lips inward to moisten them as his eyes slowly rose back to yours. 

 You leaned towards him, ever so slightly and nervously swallowed as he moved the hand he was using to support his head, to brush some loose strands of hair away from your face. His other arm made the mattress dip beside your waist, as he used it to support his weight as he leaned his upper body over you.

 His long hair fell untidily around his face and you hesitantly reached out your own hand to tuck one side of it behind his ear, surprised by how silky it felt against your fingertips. You let your palm cradle his sharp jaw as he slowly lowered his own face towards yours and both your eyelids fell shut as you waited to feel the sensation of the others lips moving against your own, but just as you felt his warm breath fan against your skin, an ear piercing scream caused you to shoot up with alarm and your forehead to smack against Loki’s.

 “Fuck!” You both cried in unison as you cradled your throbbing foreheads in your palms. The sound of loud footsteps running past your door from the hallway outside, reminded you of what caused you to startle in the first place and you quickly jumped from your bed, ignoring the way the pain in your head protested against it and rushed after the sound of the footsteps down the stairs. 

 “She died of fright.” You heard the Doctor conclude, as you turned through the doorway to the study Shakespeare was working in, to find the time lord leaning over the innkeeper’s dead body. Your auntie was stood at the open window, as if searching for something, and Shakespeare looked dazed as he sat at his desk with confusion written all over his face.

 “I don’t like how this is turning into the plot of Clue.” You commented, before you jumped when you heard footsteps behind you, only to relax when you saw they belonged to Loki.

 “Doctor!” Donna called from the window, and he immediately rushed over to catch what she was looking at but unfortunately it seemed he wasn’t quick enough.

 “What did you see?”

 “A witch.” Your auntie answered, as if she could hardly believe herself.

 ***

 During the early hours of the morning, the innkeepers body had been removed by a coroner and the Doctor had stayed up until the crack of dawn began to peak through the inn’s windows, trying to figure out how the sudden deaths and the witchcraft all linked to the disappearance of Love’s Labours Won.

 You and Loki provided little help, hardly listening to the Doctor as he voiced his thoughts loud. You were both to occupied with distracting one other, as you kept glancing at each other from across the room, the tension between the both of you had been building ever since your chance to share a kiss was stolen away from you. 

 Looking around the room, you could see everyone was caught up with trying to come up with explanations for what was happening and you realised you could probably slip out the room without anyone noticing or at least not paying it much attention.

 Giving Loki a look which made a crease form between his eyebrows you rose from your chair and quietly made your way towards the door leading to the hallway, you paused once more under the arch of the doorway and gave Loki another look, which caused his eyebrows to rise with understanding, before you disappeared into the hallway.

 You walked up the stairs and entered the room you and Loki were sharing, hoping he would figure out where to find you, you sat on the bottom of the bed as you waited.

 It wasn’t long until you heard footsteps approaching the room, no one could ever hope to move around quietly on the floorboards of the inn. The doorway to your room was lower than the others, which meant when Loki walked through it he had to duck his head. After he gently shut the door behind him, he turned and paused with his back to the door, you were looking at him, from where you sat on the bed, with a wide smile as giggles threatened to rise from your stomach at the secrecy of it all.

 “I was meant to follow after you, right?” Loki checked, as he walked further into the room.

 You nodded as you rose to your feet and met him halfway.

 “I’ve never done this before,” Loki bashfully admitted, as he looked down. “Sneak away with someone in secret, I mean.”

 “You never had anyone to sneak away with in that big old palace on Asgard?” You asked, putting little effort into hiding your surprise. “I assume you lived in a palace, I don’t actually know…”

 “Yes, I grew up in a palace,” Loki chuckled, “and no, there was no one to sneak away with in it, that was more Thor’s arena.”

 “I’ve never done this either,” you confessed, “I had visions of myself waiting here and you not showing up because I didn’t make myself clear enough and then having to return to the room pretending I just took a piss in a bucket.” 

 Loki’s laughter grew louder and his smile wider, as crinkles appeared at the side of his eyes which lit up his entire face, you decided you would like to see this expression on him more.

 You reached your hand up to his face and gently rested your palm against his cheek and in return you felt his large hands engulf your hips as they gently pulled you closer. Your other hand rose to his shoulder and brushed along it until you curled your fingers around the back of his neck to slowly pull his face towards yours.

 This time you felt his lips mould against yours without any interruptions, his right hand left your hip to brush up to the small of your back, the back of your shirt slightly rode up with his hand, and he pulled you closer so your chests were flush, while your whole arm snaked around the back of his neck and you felt the tips of his soft hair tickle against your bare forearm.

 Blindly Loki guided you towards the bed, never lifting his lips from yours for one second. Once he felt the back of his calves hit the bed frame, he let himself fall onto the mattress, it let out a squeak as did you, and you giggled against his mouth as you made yourself comfortable in his lap with your legs resting on either side of his hips.

 His hands moved to hold you firmly around your waist as your palms rested on both his shoulders. Reluctantly, you pulled away from the kiss, and turned your head away to let out a yawn, exhausted from staying up until dawn.

 “I’m that boring, huh?” Loki joked, as his hands soothed up and down the sides of your ribs.

 “I’m sorry,” you hummed, as you gave him a small peck, “I guess my lack of sleep finally caught up with me.” 

 “You should rest,” Loki suggested, as he attached his lips to the column of your neck to leave feather light kisses, you let out a throaty groan in response as the tips of your fingers dug into his shoulders.

 “Will you stay with me?” You asked with closed eyes, as you tilted your head to the side to give him better access to your neck, you felt his hand climb up your spine, before his fingers buried themselves into your hair as he cradled the back of your head. “I know you don’t need as much sleep as humans do, but will you stay with me while I do?”

 Loki lifted his head from your neck to look at you, while his fingers which were buried in your hair, gently massaged over your scalp which sent a calming sensation running straight down your spine, relaxing you even further and making your eyelids heavier. 

 You couldn’t see it on his face, but Loki was shocked by the fact you trusted him enough to wish to sleep beside him. His lips parted ever so slightly, as he stared up at you through his lashes with wide eyes full of wonder. He didn’t know what to say, so he simply nodded, which caused you to tiredly smile and give him another small kiss as thanks.

 As you both moved up the bed, the mattress creaked and squeaked beneath you. Loki rested on his back and you crawled up to him and rested your head on his chest, you could feel it softly rise and fall and you could hear his heartbeat while his calming sent surrounded you, and they all worked together to help lull you off into a peaceful sleep.

 Before you drifted off, you felt Loki’s arm curl around your shoulders while the tips of his fingers softly brushed against your arm, causing goosebumps to rise where they travelled. 

 Loki planted a kiss on the top of your head, before he let his own eyes fall shut, deciding to give sleep a try even though he wasn’t feeling particularly tired.

 ***

 You were abruptly woken up by the sounds of screams and lightening coming from the street outside your room. Due to the fact none of the candles were lit, it was filled with darkness, the only thing luminating the room was an unsettling red glow, which shone through the windows of the inn. You shot up immediately and discovered Loki had fallen asleep, kneeling on the mattress beside him you put your hand on his shoulder and shook him awake.

 “What is it?” His voice sounded croaky from his sleep, he soon heard the screams and noticed the sinister red glow of the room, he jumped from the bed and rushed to the window and you followed after him, your jaw dropped and your hand came up to your mouth at what you saw.

 From your second story window of the inn, you had a perfect view of the Globe Theatre and right now storm clouds and lightening swirled around it, while luminous crimson smoke rose from the centre. On the streets below groups of people desperately rushed away from the theatre crying and screaming.

 “Donna and the Doctor are probably already at the theatre, we have to go!” You rushed back to the bed to pull on your shoes and Loki did the same.

 Once you were both ready, you ran out of the inn and into the chaos on the street. Loki took your hand in his as you both began running towards the Globe Theatre, so you wouldn’t get separated by the large crowds running against you. 

 When you reached the theatre, you saw the stage door was slightly ajar and ran straight towards it, pulling Loki along with you. 

 As soon as you reached the stage, and saw your auntie, the Doctor and Shakespeare all stood on it, you dropped Loki’s hand. You missed the way the God’s brows formed a crease while he looked down at your hand, as you were too distracted by the terrifying sight before you. 

 Your hair blew around your face wildly, as in the centre of the theatre there was what only could be described as a hurricane of scarlet mist and lightning bolts and dark horrifying figures flew around inside the swirling phenomenon.

 “Donna!” You called, as you rushed to her side.

 She called your name when she turned over her shoulder and saw you and pulled you towards her.

 “What’s going on?” You yelled above the commotion, Loki stood closely beside you and listened to the conversation.

 “They want to end the world, take over and build their new empire.” Donna explained with tears in her eyes, “we’re too late, there’s nothing we can do.” 

 Your lips fell slack and you looked back towards the swirling flaming red mist with terror, realising it was a portal, to unleash evil upon the world.

 You looked up at Loki, his long black hair waved around his face from the gusts caused by the portal, he was staring at it with a thoughtful expression before his eyes locked with yours and he saw the fear in them. 

 With a determined look, Loki walked towards the edge of the stage, you noticed the luminous emerald mist already starting to form in his palms before he lifted them towards the centre of the theatre. His right foot came backwards, to support his weight, as his magic pushed against him but he leaned his upper body into it.

 With one hand he focused his magic on the centre of the theatre, before he moved the other to direct a burst of magic towards the royal box, your eyes followed the green mist and widened when you saw three witches who you hadn’t noticed before. With his magic focusing on the witches who were the source of the power, the portal began to deteriorate and was easily engulfed by Loki’s magic. 

 The God raised both his arms into the air, and a green surge of light shot into the night sky, taking the portal with it, the force caused the doors behind the stage to fly open and hundreds of loose pages flew into the air and with a resounding boom everything vanished, the only evidence left behind was a faint green mist which slowly began to dissipate. Even the three witches who had been sat in the royal box were gone, the only thing left behind was a crystal ball which sat on the edge of the balcony.

 The remaining members of the audience, who hadn’t managed to escape, began to slowly clap until they erupted into enthusiastic cheers and applause. 

 From the side of the stage, you watched Loki glance around at the audience, as he momentarily appeared to be caught off guard but he quickly regained his composure and lowered himself into an elegant bow with both his arms spread wide and the audience began applauding him even louder.

 Shakespeare appeared by your side and took your hand in his, your other hand was already holding Donna’s and he guided you both to the edge of the stage, beside Loki and the three of you bowed in unison, however the entire time your eyes were locked on Loki as he stared at your hand which was held in the poets, and that dangerous shadow cast over his eyes again as his jaw clenched.

 ***

 Loki had avoided you for the rest of the night. When you all returned to the inn, due to the fact most of the guests had fled the town in fright when the portal opened, there were suddenly a lot more rooms going spare. Loki had vanished to one of the rooms without a word, despite the fact everyone was trying to bestow him with gratitude and praise for literally saving the world, he ignored it all.

 You had stayed in the common room, with Donna, the Doctor and Shakespeare as they explained everything that had happened. The witches in the royal box had possessed Shakespeare last night as he was writing the end of Love’s Labours Won and wrote a spell into the script, the innkeeper must have witnessed this and died from the fright. They had killed the man who had tried to cancel the play as they needed it to be performed and for the actor to read the spell out loud on stage to open the portal, which would’ve allowed millions of their kind to travel through and invade Earth, the Doctor had called them the Carrionites. 

 The entire time you couldn’t keep Loki off your mind, the look on his face when he saw your hand in Shakespeare’s, kept appearing behind your eyes, making your heart sink deeper each time. As soon as Donna and the Doctor had finished explaining everything to you, you excused yourself and headed upstairs to the rooms and stopped in front of the door which you had seen Loki disappear behind.

 “Loki?” You softly knocked on the door, but there came no response. You tried the handle, but it was firmly locked.

 “Can we talk?” You tried again, and you waited, but still nothing.

 You rested your forehead against the door in defeat and sighed. 

 “Goodnight, Loki.” You whispered before you retreated to your room.

 ***

 The next morning the Doctor had decided to return to the theatre to see if he could help Shakespeare salvage any parts of Love’s Labours Won, but it seemed as though all traces of it vanished when Loki destroyed the portal, finally solving your mystery of how it disappeared. 

 Loki still hadn’t emerged from his room, even when you had knocked on his door to inform him that you were all heading to the theatre and then from there you would be returning to the TARDIS. 

 You were beginning to feel incredibly worried about him while you sat on a wooden box on the stage of the Globe Theatre as your concerns raced through your mind. 

 “What troubles you?” You startled, since you had been too distracted by your worries to even notice that Shakespeare had taken a seat beside you on the box.

 You contemplated whether or not you should actually tell the poet what was troubling you or if you should dismiss him, you realised that you couldn’t really voice your worries to Donna or the Doctor since neither of them knew about what happened between you and Loki yet. At least with Shakespeare he would be out of your life for good within the hour, so you decided you could share it with him.

 “It’s Loki,” you sighed sadly, “he has been avoiding me.”

 You suddenly felt the weight of his hand on your lower back, as he pulled you closer and you stiffened.

 “If Loki won’t give you his attention. Why not entertain a man who will?” Shakespeare proposed, before he began leaning his face towards yours. 

 Your eyes widened and you immediately brought your hands to his chest to push him away.

 “It seems I arrived at the wrong time.” As soon as you heard Loki’s familiar deep voice, your heart plummeted in your chest. 

 “Loki,” you looked over your shoulder at him, guilt already filling your eyes, despite the fact you hadn’t actually done anything wrong. You weren’t going to kiss Shakespeare, you had been milliseconds away from pushing him off the box.  

 You rose to your feet and tried to walk towards Loki but he took a step backwards to maintain the distance and you got the hint.

 “Good props store, back there!” The Doctor caught your attention, you turned and saw him and Donna returning to the stage, dressed in various different props and costume pieces.

 “Not sure about this, though.” He held up what appeared to be a large animals skull in his left hand, you couldn’t depict what it was, but it looked ghastly. “Reminds me of a Sycorax.” 

 “Sycorax.” Shakespeare repeated. “Nice word. I’ll have that one off you as well.”

 “I should be on 10%.” The Doctor muttered. 

 “Mobius.” You heard Loki gasp from behind you, and your attention turned to his line of sight, to find a fair haired man, with a moustache and wearing a plain brown suit enter the theatre by one of the stalls entrances, followed by a group of armed officers. You instantly recognised him as the man Loki had been hiding from in Pompeii.

 “It’s nice to finally see you again, Loki.” The man spoke, sounding like an old friend, but there was definitely something far more sinister hiding in his tone. 

 By now the exchange had captured everyone’s attention, as you all glanced between Loki and the new stranger Loki had addressed as Mobius. 

 “How did you find me?” Loki asked, as he stepped towards the edge of the stage. 

 “It wasn’t too hard, we’ve been tracking seismic activities of your magic. You lead us right to you.” Mobius smiled, it seemed that composed smile never left his face. From how uneasy Loki appeared, you decided you disliked him already.

 “I’d just like to know, who would be idiotic enough to give you, of all people, free rein through all of time and space.” Mobius asked Loki, who had parted his lips to answer but before he could, the Doctor stepped up to the edge of the stage beside him.

 “That would be me.” The Doctor announced, still dressed in all the props he had found back stage, including a pleated collar and an oversized beret while he still held the disturbing animal skull, he looked quite the spectacle.

 Mobius was speechless for a moment, as his eyes dragged up and down the Doctor’s tall form.

 “He’s a time lord.” Loki proudly lifted his head, as one might just before they lay down their cards to reveal a winning hand.

 Mobius smile finally dropped, and you couldn’t help the smirk that lifted at the corner of your lips, proud to see Loki have an advantage.

 “Impossible. They’re all gone.” Mobius tried to hide any traces of confusion from his face and tone and instead feigned confidence in his statement.

 “All except me.” The Doctor explained, and you practically saw the realisation hit Mobius at full force.

 “You’re...” The words died on Mobius’ tongue, before his eyes filled with horror.

 “I’m beginning to get the feeling that they don’t honour me as much as they do the other time lords.” The Doctor whispered to Loki, who was now frowning.

 Mobius commanded something you couldn’t hear to the armed officers around him and they raised their weapons.

 “I think that is our cue to run.” The Doctor decided as he slowly began backing away, he threw the animals skull at Shakespeare, who quickly caught it, then took Donna’s hand in his own as he rushed past her and lead her out the stage door with you and Loki following closely behind him.

 You followed the trail of the Doctors long brown trench coat, through the busy streets, glad that he seemed to memorise the way to the TARDIS because you had no idea, while you had flashbacks of running for your life through Pompeii, except this time you were running from the exact same thing Loki had been. 

  Once the familiar blue box caught your eye, your legs began carrying you even quicker as you made your final sprint towards it. The Doctor was already at the door, holding it open, you made it in first and then Loki closely after you.

 The Doctor wasted no time and immediately rushed to the controls to get the TARDIS out of there as soon as possible, while you leant over the rail, as you tried to catch your breath. You felt the sharp pain of a stitch in your side and brought the tips of your fingers up to your abdomen and dug them into your skin where you felt the pain, in an attempt to ease it.

 Just as the familiar tremors and the sound of the engine wheezing filled the control room, an outside force caused the ship to jerk harshly and sent you crashing to the floor.

 “Shit.” You cursed under your breath, as pain shot through your hip from the impact of hitting the hard floor.

 Glancing around it seemed everyone else had managed to maintain their balance, the Doctor was still frantically working at the controls, Donna was glancing at you with concern from the other side of the control room and Loki looked lost in thought while he held on tight to the rail.

 Eventually the tremors subsided and the TARDIS settled into a tranquil state and the Doctor collapsed into the seats with his feet rested up against the ships console, looking exhausted as he finally pulled the pleated collar from off his neck with a heavy sigh.

 “Well… now we’re all on the run from the Time Variance Authority.” The time lord concluded. 

[p-artsypants]

Integrity- Chapter 8

Ao3 | FF.net

Monday morning rolled around with a cool, all encasing fog. The gray mist that settled in between buildings, blotting out sunlight, and casting a refreshing coolness on everything blanketed underneath it.

It was glum.

Ladybug had escorted Gabriel to the police last night, as they had planned. Though he was drunk, Gabriel was well behaved. This allowed Ladybug to convince the Police to stay quiet about his arrest. Of course, it was inevitable that the media would catch wind of it, and it would be all over the news. 

But she just wanted to have a few days to prepare to announce it herself, and to give Adrien some time with his mother. 

He hadn’t come home last night, not that she expected him too. He may be gone for the rest of the week. Maybe longer. She couldn’t blame him for staying away. 

She just missed him already.

“Hey Marinette,” Alya greeted warmly. “Where’s Sunshine? He’s gotta get rid of this fog!” 

“Yeah dude, where’s my dawg?” Said Nino. 

Marinette smiled, but it didn’t quite reach her eyes. How much truth could she spare? This was Rena Rouge and Carapace after all. Surely they were trustworthy. Would Adrien mind?

“Um…he’s with his mother.” 

Nino and Alya just stared at her, dawning horror creeping on their faces. 

“He’s dead?”

“No!” Marinette scrambled to explain. “No, no…We found his mother yesterday. Well, he found her a few days ago, but we couldn’t do anything about it until last night.” 

Alya blinked a few times. “Okay girl, you lost me. You often lose me, but this is like—a whole other dimension. Can ya back up a touch?”

“I’ll tell you guys everything after school, but you have to promise me not to tell anyone.” She leaned closer. “This is just as secret, or even more so, as your secret identities.” 

Alya rapidly blinked again. “Wh-what?! What are you—how do you—What!?”

“That’s all I’m saying for now.”

“You can’t just leave us there!” 

“That’s all that’s safe to say here. Just...just trust me. Okay?” 

Alya took a long breath. They’d been through this before. Her trust was constantly being tested by Marinette. The absences, the tardiness, the forgetful ‘oh I have to go water my hamster’ ness. “Girl...I did trust you. But...are you going to finally explain what’s going on?” 

“Yes. I’ll tell you everything. If you’ll just be patient with me.” 

Alya exhaled, her shoulders relaxing. “Okay. I think that’s worth it.” 

They travelled together upstairs and into the classroom, where several other students milled about quietly. It seemed they hadn’t recovered from the turmoil from last week. 

Faces turned to her, weak smiles in place. Sincere enough, but lacking luster. She didn’t really blame them. She felt like that too. 

After some time, Miss Bustier arrived, and settled everyone in their seats. 

And then there was a knock at the door. 

“Come in.” 

Miss Bustier invited in the devil, and the mother of the devil. 

Lila. Lila was here. 

“Hello, Madam Rossi, are you vouching for Lila’s tardiness?” 

“On the contrary,” the woman said coldly. “Lila won’t be attending your class anymore, or this school, for that matter. But before we leave, I wanted to make sure she apologized to those she wronged.”

My my, what an interesting turn of fate. Lila stood in front, arms crossed, and full of spite. 

“Where’s Mr. Agreste?” Madam Rossi asked. 

“He’s not here,” Marinette supplied. “He’s visiting family.” 

“Ha!” Said Lila. “That proves it! If he wasn’t guilty, he’d be here!” 

“Hush, Lila. I’ve heard enough from you.” Her mother spat. “You, what’s your name?” He looked at Marinette. 

“Uh, Marinette Dupain-Cheng?” 

“Marinette—first of all, I want to apologize to you and your mother. She called me with concerns and I blew her off. In fact, I didn’t know there were any problems until I received a court summons at my workplace. Not only was my daughter lying to me about her after school activities, but she lied about the school being closed to take an extended vacation!” 

There were scoffs of disgust from around the room. 

“Mama...” Lila whined. 

“I said be quiet, child. Your lying has gotten too far out of control and I’ve had enough of it. It’s time your friends knew the truth. And you’re going to tell them. Now.” 

Lila swallowed. “Um...I didn’t actually go with my mother abroad for several months. I was at home. I told her the principal was akumatized and the school was closed.” 

“Now, about Marinette?” 

Lila groaned. “Marinette was right. I didn’t bully her at all. I made all that stuff up...” 

“And regarding Adrien Agreste?” 

“Adrien...never touched me. I lied. I was mad because I was fired from Gabriel for harassing Adrien.” 

“Anything else you want to get off your chest?” 

“No.” 

“Well, that’s a shame.” Madam Rossi huffed. “What do you have to say to Marinette?” 

“...I’m sorry.” 

“For?” 

“For lying.” 

“Not good enough, Lila. Try again.”

Lila hissed, like apologizing was actually, physically painful. “I’m sorry for tattling on you to your mom. And I’m sorry for trying to get you expelled.” 

Marinette pushed her luck. “...and for turning my friends against me?” 

“AND for turning your friends against you.” 

Eh. Good enough. 

“Now, Marinette,” said Madam Rossi. “Lila must apologize to Adrien, but she’s being sent back to Italy right away. Will you record it and make sure he sees it?” 

“Of course, ma’am.” Marinette took out her phone and turned on the camera. “Ready when you are.” 

Madam Rossi nudged her daughter in the ribs. 

“Adrien...I’m sorry I lied about you touching me. I’m sorry I lied to get into modeling with you. And I’m sorry I kissed your cheek without permission...and I'm sorry I spied on you.” With a little shrug, that’s where she ended it. 

Marinette stopped recording and leveled a glare at Lila. “You’re not really sorry, are you? You wouldn’t think anything was wrong if your mom wasn’t here making you apologize.” 

Lila didn’t answer, but her dead-eyed glare spoke volumes. 

“You’re a psychopath.”

“Oh you think you’re so smug! Just because my lies caught up to me first! But you’re just as much as a liar as I am, aren’t you, little miss goody goody?” 

Maybe she was being petty. Maybe it was adrenaline. Or maybe she really didn’t like being called a liar. 

Either way, she held back just long enough to look in her purse. 

Tikki gave her a firm nod. 

Time to be selfish. 

“Tikki, Spots on.” 

In a whirl of pink, Ladybug sat in Marinette’s seat and the room went dead silent. 

Except for Alya, who was making some choked wheezing sounds. 

“Happy now, Lila?” Ladybug said calmly. “Yes, I lied, and flaked, and ditched my friends. I hated every minute of it, but I knew fighting akumas came first, and everything else came second. I couldn’t tell a single soul until Hawkmoth was defeated. Not even my partner.” She leveled her gaze on Lila. “But you? You just lie because you can. You have no plans, you just lie and then lie again when someone calls you out on them. You don’t care. You never cared. All you care about is yourself. That’s the reason you got caught. I chose to reveal my secret because it’s safe now.”

“Shut up!” Lila barked. Then she actually threw a punch at the hero of Paris. 

Naturally, Ladybug dodged it like she had been moving in slow motion. 

“You’re the worst! This whole time I thought there were two stuck up, nosy, holier-than-thou bitches in Paris. But now I see it’s only one. You don’t deserve your fame or your powers! I could have had everything! Popularity! Friends! Adrien! Fame! Even powers like Hawkmoth promised me! But you had to ruin it for me! You always ruin everything! I hate you! I hate you!!” 

“Alright, we’re done.” Said Madam Rossi. She wrapped her arms around Lila, as she continued to wriggle and scream. “I see now that Italy isn’t going to be a good idea either. We’ll find a nice, quiet...resort for you for a little while.” 

But Lila just continued her screaming and kicking. Her mother had to forcibly pull her from the room. 

The door shut with a slam, Lila’s tantrum muffled down the hall. 

And then, Ladybug stood there, keenly aware of the actions she had just made in front of all her classmates. Even Miss Bustier was slack jawed. 

“I expect all of you can keep a secret of this magnitude. It would be best if you never even saw me transform.” 

Still silence. But Marinette dropped her transformation and sat down. 

Alya was the only one able to find a voice. “Why now? What changed?” 

“It’s safe now.” Marinette explained. “Relatively speaking. I’m certain that there’s people out there who still want to hurt me. But if we all keep this to ourselves, I see no harm.” 

“What about Lila?” Asked Alya. 

“Well, she does have a track record for faultless honesty. Who wouldn’t believe her?” Marinette said sarcastically. 

“Safe?” Nino asked, finding his voice. “Safe how?”

It was the sweetest truth in the world. “Chat Noir and I defeated Hawkmoth.” 

The sentence was like electricity, jolting the room with excitement, cheers, and hugs. Students scrambled to hug her in gratitude. 

“How?! When?!” Barked Alya. “There was no akuma! How did this happen!?”

Miss Bustier sat at the edge of her desk, resigned that there would be no learning today, but she really didn’t mind. 

“Espionage.” Marinette said, matter-of-factly. “And to be honest, it was mostly Chat. We just officially arrested him last night.”

“Who was he? How did it happen?! I need details!” Alya nearly screamed and grabbed her by the collar and shook. 

“Alya, calm down.” Marinette laughed. “I’d love to tell you all the details, but…I haven’t told anyone else yet. I have to address the public and write a speech…but I don’t even know where to start…”

Miss Bustier clapped. “Marinette! I have an idea!” 

She looked to her teacher, skeptical. “Yes?”

“A writing assignment for the class. You give us the details, everyone will take notes, and we’ll help you write the speech! It would be an excellent exercise for writing from an interview.” 

Marinette paused, crossing her arms and looking forward towards Adrien’s seat. 

Again, the news about Gabriel was going to be public at some point. If she could get it out quickly before the other media beat her to it, she might be able to manipulate the story in her favor. As angry as she was with Gabriel, his motive was fine, and he showed…remorse? Maybe he could be redeemed and maybe Adrien could have his family back one day. 

“As long as everyone promises to not talk about it to anyone, I don’t mind sharing the details.” 

There was another cheer around the class as everyone gathered their phones and notebooks to take notes. 

Miss Bustier clarified for everyone, “If you’re recording Marinette, the video promptly gets deleted after the assignment is over. It does not get posted on any social media, or get sent to anyone. This is for Marinette’s safety, do you all understand?”

“Yes, Miss Bustier!” Called the class, unanimously. After the dreadful behavior with Lila, no one was eager to get on Marinette’s bad side again.

Marinette stood at the front of the room, recounting what had happened, with the smallest twist of having Chat Noir as a separate character. If someone did blab, Adrien’s identity would be safe. 

“Adrien’s the hero of our story.” She began. “Gabriel Agreste was arrested last night at 10:30, coming peacefully and quietly. On Thursday night, he confided in his son, that he was in fact, Hawkmoth, and that his assistant was Mayura. He disclosed his purpose was to save the life of his wife Emilie, who had fallen mysteriously ill. He was under the assumption that the only cure was using Chat’s and my Miraculous. It is unknown where he got this idea from. Adrien was skeptical enough to flag down Chat Noir as he was doing a late night patrol. He explained the situation to my partner. From there, they waited until Monsieur Agreste went to sleep, before stealing the Miraculous off of him. Chat then delivered the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculous to me, and further explained the situation. After consulting my resources, we visited M. Agreste and told him it was likely we could still save his wife without the need for our Miraculous. He then willingly gave himself up and apologized. He has been taken into police custody.” 

“Excuse me, Ladybug,” Alya called out, just like in a real press conference. “What happened to Mayura? Is she in police custody as well?”

“I don’t know about that. The police are aware of her involvement, but she was fired by Gabriel earlier this week. She wasn’t with him when he was arrested.”

“Are you going to go after her?”

“No. She no longer has a Miraculous. This is not a job for us anymore.”

Someone else raised their hand, Nathaniel. “How much do you want us to elaborate on Adrien’s involvement?”

“I only have Adrien’s best interest at heart. While I know he’d rather not be mentioned at all, I think it’s extremely important for the media to know that he was not complicit in his father’s actions.” 

“Where is Adrien now?” Asked Chloe, more out of concern than for the assignment. 

“He is with his mother while she gets treated. I won’t disclose that information to the public.” Then she added as a side note, “but if you want to know, ask me later, Chloe.” 

Chloe just took a relieved sigh and nodded to her. It seemed all the previous animosity between her and Ladybug, or even Marinette, had faded with all this new information. 

“Where are the Butterfly and Peacock Miraculous now?” Asked Kim.

“Someplace safe.” Marinette smiled. “There’s no fear of someone else getting a hold of them.” 

“Are Ladybug and Chat Noir retiring now?” Asked Rose, full of emotion.

“Ladybug will continue her patrols, and try to help around the city. I haven’t talked with Chat about what he wants to do.” 

Alya raised her hand again, her eyes shining with excitement. “Any chance of auxiliary heroes getting to join you every once in a while?”

Marinette shrugged. “Perhaps.” There was no reason for them to, but with Gabriel behind bars, there was no reason for them not to. “Any other questions?” 

The class was frantically scribbling down notes, but there were no more raised hands. 

“I have plenty of off the record questions!” Alya called. 

“I’ll answer those later,” Marinette asked. 

“Alright,” began Miss Bustier. “These speeches will be due…Wednesday? Does that work for you, Marinette?”

“That should be perfect.”

“Wonderful. Then I won’t be giving anymore literature homework until then, because I want everyone to focus on this. Please write at least one page, double spaced. But more is fine. Ladybug has the right to edit whichever one she picks.” She glanced at the clock. “Goodness, that was almost the whole hour! I’ll give you the rest of the hour to talk among yourselves.”

—

While stories don’t typically have a happy ending in real life, Marinette was happy to note that things were working out nicely. The fog remained the rest of the week as Adrien stayed away from Paris. Juleka, of all people, ended up writing the most articulate, emotional, and accurate speech out of the bunch, and Ladybug presented it at a press conference with the Mayor. 

Stories of all sorts of accuracies came out of it from the media, but conspiracies were loudly silenced, as Ladybug’s speech in full was available to everyone. Gabriel had yet to make any statements of his own, but his lack of urgency only lended itself to the official story. 

It was over.

Gabriel’s trial would come in time, and Ladybug and Chat Noir would both be expected to testify, but the fight against Hawkmoth was over. 

Despite revealing herself to her family and classmates, Marinette felt light. Unburdened, and guiltless. The raised grades were a bonus. 

There was just one thing missing.

Adrien.

It had been a week since he stepped into that portal with his mother. He hadn’t taken his phone with him, but she never received a message from his baton. Not even a confirmation that he made it safely. 

After several days of solid dependence and partnership, she missed him terribly.

Then finally, late one night, she awoke to a flash of light on her balcony. She was instantly awake, throwing open the door to investigate. 

Belle Noir stood there, alone, and looking exhausted. 

“Adrien?” She asked softly. 

“Miss me, My Lady?”

“Unbelievably.”

Adrien dismissed his transformation and dragged himself over to her room. 

“So what happened? How is she?”

“Still asleep.” He landed on her bed, and took off his shoes. “Not likely to wake up for a while still…but she looks better. They told me to go home, since being around her and watching was making me ill.”

“Are you alright?”

“Just need a shower and a good night’s rest. Can I sleep next to you? I really missed you.”

“I wouldn’t want you anywhere else.”

After showering and shaving, a nice clean Adrien flopped onto Marinette’s bed. He inhaled deeply. “Hmm, I missed this smell.” 

“Weirdo.”

“Smells like bread and cinnamon and pretty girl.” 

“Do you want to hear about all the trouble I got into while you were gone?”

“All of it…if I can stay awake.”

So Marinette told it all, starting on Monday morning with Lila, and leading all the way up to the speech, which she showed him on her phone. 

“You just transformed? In front of everyone?”

She shrugged. “Not my brightest move, but Lila was accusing me of lying too…I just wanted to get it out in the air. I don’t regret it.”

“Did you tell anyone who I am?”

“Nope. I thought about telling Alya and Nino, but your identity is yours to tell. Or to keep a secret. It’s totally up to you.” 

Adrien had his eyes half closed, the comfort of the bed and the warmth from his girlfriend relaxing him to sleep. “I have some ideas.”

“Care to share?”

“No. Too tired.”

“Okay kitty.” She giggled. Then she shuffled down to lay beside him, before he latched on and nuzzled her. “Hmmmmm My Lady.”

“Goodnight Kitty Cat.”

“Night. I love…”

“I love too.”

—

In the morning, Marinette woke up to an empty bed. For a moment, she worried that Adrien coming back last night had been a dream. But his suitcase was open and rifled through. 

Confused, she got up and got dressed, and then came down for breakfast. 

“Morning Miss Hero.” Sabine said fondly.

“Morning mama…did you see Adrien this morning?”

“I didn’t, but your father did. Said he got up really early to take care of some stuff.

“‘Stuff’ huh? Sounds vague.” 

“I don’t know. But he said he’ll meet you at school. So instead of interrogating me, you can go to class and find out for yourself.” 

“Oh I suppose!” Marinette said, dramatically. Then she took a seat at the table and started pouring herself some breakfast. 

“They’re talking about the Hawkmoth story again.” Sabine gestured to the muted TV. “Some people are calling for a reinstatement of the guillotine.”

Marinette scoffed. “Yeah, maybe if there had been any lasting damage, maybe. But as it stands, no one died, no collateral damage…maybe some trauma I guess.”

“You’re being awfully defensive of the man you’ve been fighting the last year.” 

Marinette shrugged. “I just…want Adrien to have his family back. I know Gabriel has to face punishment, and jail might even soften him up to be a better dad when he gets out. I just want him to be able to have his dad in his life…even if it’s just a little bit.”

“Even after all this, he doesn’t hate his father?”

“I couldn’t say.” 

—

The fog had lifted. The morning sunlight was warm and bright, the birds chirped, the flowers bloomed. Adrien was back in Paris, somewhere, and all was right with the word. 

Marinette almost skipped to school.

Half of her class awaited her by the steps, and when she came into view, they all started calling for her. “Marinette! Marinette!” 

“Carry your bag to class?”

“Carry you to class?”

“Guys guys,” she laughed. “I’m flattered, but you don’t need to keep pampering me. It was fun last week, but we’re cool now, okay?”

“We just wanted to let you know that we were sorry and we appreciate you!” Said Rose, enthusiastically.

“I understand. And I forgive you. The cards, and the back rubs, and the foot rubs, and the manicures…I got it. But I don’t want our friendship to revolve around you guys just worshipping me. And I especially don’t want to be treated like this because of who I am. Let’s just…all go for ice cream this weekend?”

“Fine, but I’m paying for your ice cream!”

“No! I want to pay!”

Marinette chuckled to herself and led the throng of followers into the school. Maybe…one more week of being spoiled wouldn’t hurt. Right?

“Have you heard anything from Adrien?” Nino asked, as he asked everyday. 

“Actually, I did! I’m fairly certain he’ll be in class today too!”

Nino pumped his fist. 

“What should we do to make him feel welcome?” Asked Rose. “We were pretty crappy to him last time we saw him. After all he’s been through…”

Marinette looked over the remorseful faces staring at her. They wanted to make things right. 

“I think apologies, hugs, and just being there for him will be enough. I think he’d appreciate affection, but not being treated like he’s fragile. He’s incredibly strong, you know.” 

They all nodded, but she could hear them conspiring with each other about cards and a cake. She wasn’t going to fight them on this. Adrien needed his friends, and sincere ones at that. 

Walking into the classroom, Marinette’s eye immediately fell on the very expensive handbag on her desk. Chloe sat at her own desk, admiring her nails. 

“Is that—?”

“A Hermes Birkin Togo Handbag with gold Hardware? Why yes, it is.” 

“Why is it on my desk?”

Chloe shrugged. “what, that old thing? I got it, but it doesn’t match my wardrobe, so I figured you would appreciate it.” 

“But…this is new this season! It hasn’t even been released yet!”

“Well, it’s old to me. Give it to your mom if you don’t want it. It’s no skin off my nose!” 

Marinette gave her a genuine smile. “Thank you Chloe, this means a lot to me. Especially after all that happened.” 

“Are you talking about my silly little tantrum? Puh-lease. Even I’m not immune to the allure of pretty jewelry. But it won’t happen again, I’m over combs.”

“Well, I’m crazy about this bag, so thank you.” 

Chloe’s mouth twitched before she said, “you’re welcome.”

Alya and Marinette spent the rest of the morning gushing over the bag, because regardless of who it came from, it was a nice bag. Miss Bustier came in and started the lesson.

It was then that Marinette realized Adrien still hadn’t shown up. 

“I thought you said he was coming today?” Whispered Nino.

“I thought he was. He doesn’t have his phone on him anymore either.”

A few minutes passed before a black blur whizzed by the window. It back tracked and Chat Noir landed on the ledge, knocking on the window. 

“Chat Noir?” Miss Bustier asked as Kim opened the window. 

“So sorry I’m late! I was packing up some of my mother’s belongings to take to her later.” He stalked across the room, with Adrien’s bag draped over his shoulder. Then he stopped at Marinette’s desk, before stooping to kiss her on the lips. “Good morning, My Lady. Sorry I left without saying anything. I woke up early and I didn’t want to bother you.” 

“It’s okay.”

“Claws in.” 

And then it all clicked. The class went ballistic. There was screaming, hugs, well-intended punches, and overall excitement. 

Miss Bustier rolled her eyes fondly. “Guess I’ll have to remove your absences too, to be fair.” 

“Oh, sorry. When Marinette told me she revealed her identity to the class, I knew I had to too, and even more dramatically.” 

“You’re such a goober.” Marinette teased fondly.

“But I’m your goober!”

[maxwell-grant]

On The Shadow’s “new” backstory

Poke around any discussion of The Shadow and the movie in particular and you’re gonna find a lot of contention regarding the movie’s biggest shift from the source material, that was inventing a whole new backstory for the character where, prior to being The Shadow, he used to be a murderous warlord on Tibet who was kidnapped by monks and forced to undergo redemption and put his skills to fight evil. 

It was not a popular decision at the time, to put it mildly. It didn’t do anything to improve the film (that text crawl really shoots the entire film in the foot), it soured a lot of fan opinions on the whole thing, and yet it’s become such a fixture of every story told with the character since then, that odds are most people think this is just what he always like, that this lip-service about redemption and being a former bastard turned hero was always what the character “was about”. 

I have some complicated thoughts on it and how it’s affecte Shadow stories since then, most of whom are negative, but the thing is, I get where it’s coming from. I get why they felt the need to change his origin like that, and why it’s stuck around. 

In the pulps, The Shadow’s backstory was, to sum it up, that he was a spy who went to war, learned a lot of skills and did a lot of things, and then pivoted to fighting crime in the late thirties. That was the backstory of most 30s American pulp heroes, actually, give or take a couple of differences. And for a pulp hero, it works. But modern audiences have been taught to expect more.

The movie, in trying to repackage the character for a modern audience, in turning The Shadow into a superhero so he could survive in a 90s blockbuster landscape, needed an appropriately punchy superhero backstory. Superhero backstories tend to be, in general, all about a dramatic hook that simplifies their motivations, powerset or life stories into a one-sentence pitch. Batman lost his parents in a brutal mugging as a child and swore to stop that from happening to others. Spider-Man’s uncle died because of his irresponsibility. Ben Grimm gained superpowers from space rays like his friends, except he got turned into a deformed rock monster who can never look normal again. Bruce Banner got caught in an atomic blast that made him into an unkillable rage monster. A dramatic transgression happened, they must correct it by becoming dramatic figures themselves.

They’ve made 3 John Wick movies with little more motivation to the central character other than “they killed his dog in the first movie”. That’s not a dismissal, it’s just effective storytelling. We don’t need more motivation for John Wick, we don’t need Batman flashbacks in every film, we get a one-sentence hook for a tangible, grounded motivation that lets the characters hit the ground running. “Used to be a savage murderous warlord, now applies said savagery to killing criminals” is a simple, easily understood pitch that’s considerably more dramatic than his former backstory. It works as a superhero backstory, and you can argue it’s even somewhat thematically fitting, since “a villain who turns evil against evil” has been part of The Shadow’s concept from day one. 

So what’s the problem with it?

Well, for one, The Shadow is not a superhero. He doesn’t look like them, he doesn’t act like them, he doesn’t live in their world. They can try and turn him into one, and they have done that several times, but the character’s core traits, central appeal and identity are not only considerably older than the superhero, they run directly counter to what defines a superhero. The movie that tried turning him into a superhero was a box office and critical failure, and the Dynamite comics have largely just succeeded at keeping the character in the fringes of the public eye and nothing more. If turning The Shadow into a superhero was intended to revitalize his success to modern audiences, it clearly hasn’t worked in over two decades, despite superheroes being more popular than ever before. It’s kept him on little more than life support.

And two, one of the very problems of trying to turn The Shadow into a superhero, and give him an ultra-dramatic superhero backstory pitch, is because it runs counter to a cornerstone of The Shadow’s appeal: the mystery. Superheroes have to pull double duty in being both the impressive, great warriors and forces of change within a story, as well as being our relatable, POV protagonist whose struggles we relate to. The Shadow, in the pulps, split that balance, between himself, and the agents and protagonists of any given Shadow story. @oldschoolcrimefighters  has brilliant writings on The Shadow and his agents that inspired me to do this blog in the first place and you should all read, and I’m going to quote this one in particular: 

“..modern storytelling focuses more on characterization rather than plot. I think a lot of creators come at The Shadow with that in mind, and with a mindset built on other comics and properties: the titular character is the one to focus on. And the radio show, movie(s), and comics – the most readily available mediums for research – don’t do much to disabuse them of this idea.

So creators shine the spotlight on The Shadow. They try to humanize him, make him into someone we the readers will empathize with and relate to and root for and all that jazz. They give him motivations and backstories and banter, a token romantic interest (Margo) and sometimes sidekick (usually Moe) to bounce exposition off of and provide comic relief. 

The Shadow doesn’t take kindly to spotlights. And even if he did, let’s be real, he’s not the most relatable dude. He’s a power fantasy. (And there’s nothing wrong with that.)

Whether or not he should be humanized at all is a touchy subject – I personally think the pulps portray him as a far more empathetic, fallible, playful being than people give them credit for. The thing is, when the pulps humanize him, it’s in a particular context. It’s in his relationships with other characters – especially the supporting cast – that his humanity shines.”

And that brings to the third problem: The Shadow doesn’t need a backstory that takes up so much screentime and focus. It has never factored into what made the character popular in his prime. In the pulps, we jumped right into his presence in the lives of others and his adventures, with only very sparse information about his past delivered every couple dozen books or so. It took over 131 novels for the name “Kent Allard” to even show up with a “proper” backstory, and even then, it consisted of little more than stuff we’d already been told prior about him (he was in the war, he used to be a spy, he traveled around the world with false names). And after a couple dozen stories, Kent Allard appeared less and less, about as often as the fake identity of Henry Arnaud, to the point the final Gibson stories omit him all together and even point to Lamont Cranston as the “true” identity of The Shadow. Kent Allard was just a name he went by a few times, and nothing more.

The most popular version of the character by far, the radio show, didn’t even have that. We knew nothing about the radio Shadow’s backstory other than some of his travels in the past he’d mention on certain episodes and what the opening narration told you. He was our POV protagonist in those episodes far more so in the pulps, and yet, clearly they must have been doing something right, if audiences never once missed the fact that they knew next to nothing about who he used to be before.

The very reason The Shadow became a character in the first place was because of popularity. It was because listeners tuning in to Detective Story Hour found themselves faced with the sibilant, cruel, snake-like whispery taunts of a narrator who talked and acted like no one they had heard announce other radio shows, who was easily the most interesting part of the shows he announced, and whose voice and personality held them in such fascination, even when he was literally nothing but a voice and a personality, that they started demanding to hear more of him, asking for stories starring this dark prince of radio that lived so vividly in their brains, that they didn’t notice, or care, that such stories about him didn’t exist yet. 

And when he was turned into a crimefighting character, his backstory was built in a way that allowed Gibson and any future writers to play around with and insert events and adventures as they saw fit. His adventures with the Tsar in Russia, his travels to India, Africa, Tibet, his war experiences, unrecorded adventures with allies and agents and villains of any kind, his post-war travels as Kent Allard, whatever happened in the years between his crash in the Yucatan and his arrival in America. Hell, if you want to have a period where he really loses it and does immoral things he isn’t proud of, there’s any number of periods you can insert mistakes and bad decisions that would define his actions years down the lane. It was a sandbox of any possibilities, grounded to a strong character who we could follow into any adventure because we’d be interested in learning more about him. 

A good backstory helps, and The Shadow’s motivation was grounded to it, but it was never a necessary component to his popularity. It was never something that needed much focus beyond the sparse information. When handled poorly, a backstory only really threatens to taint that appeal, and that’s what happened.

The “hook” that got audiences to pay attention to The Shadow was his sinister personality and charismatic cruelty. That was what they came for. What got them to stay, and read the stories and form lifelong devotions to the character and his adventures, was discovering that this personality belonged to a character who was, utterly, on the side of good, who used his skills and powers of great villainy to protect innocents, to help and uplift people just like the readers and listeners. That dual nature was a big part of why The Shadow was so enduring and popular in his prime, part of what set him apart from all of his contemporaries and imitators. 

It’s hardly much of a contrast, hardly much of a fascinating and layered character that we want to learn about or spend time with, if he was just always a horrible villain who is only marginally less horrible now, is it? A Shadow who used to be every bit the horrible villain he looks and acts like isn’t really that interesting, it’s just what you’d expect from him at first glance. What’s the point of caring about a man trying to regain his humanity, if we never get to see much of that humanity in the first place? What’s the point of even going into his past if we know all about it?

What’s the point of taking this backstory that was all about open possibilities for storytellers, all about covering the intricate life of a complex and strong character, to reduce it into a quick, punchy one-sentence summation that simply sets down a baseline for all future stories to repeat ad nauseum?

It’s not that I don’t think you can tell stories about The Shadow’s backstory, quite the opposite. It’s not that I don’t think the character having a strong “hook” for audiences is unneccessary (he already has). And it’s not that I don’t think he needs a motivation (he already has). But I have to ask:

What’s the point of shining a spotlight on a shadow, if not to eliminate it?

[somepinkthing]

@angstymdzsthoughts part 2 of the YZY ultimatum AU!!! Finally!!! I have no idea why JYL gave me so much trouble to write lol

[Part 1]

---

“Madam Yu, has my disciple offended you in some way?” 

Madam Yu whirled around to face Nie Mingjue as he entered the room to the disciples’ quarters. His younger brother--who had run out of the room when he had seen the lady of Lotus Pier enter in a rage--trailed in behind him. She grit her teeth so hard that Wei Ying could hear them grinding against each other. Her vice-like grip on his arm didn’t loosen either.

“If he has, release him and I will see him properly punished,” Sect Leader Nie commanded. Wei Ying was surprised. In all the time he has spent under him these past two years, he had never known Sect Leader Nie to be so sarcastic. As if he didn’t know that it was Wei Ying’s entire presence that offended her.

“What is the meaning of this, Sect Leader Nie?” Madam Yu finally managed, “Why would you show my sect the disrespect of parading this boy around for all to see?”

Nie Mingjue raised an eyebrow. Even Wei Ying was surprised. It was one thing for the madam to take her anger out on a mere disciple, it was another to announce this a matter of politics and to take it up with a sect leader so directly. Madam Yu was harsh and blunt but never to the point of being disrespectful to another sect, especially not one as powerful as Qinghe Nie. She hated Wei Ying more than even he thought.

“If I remember correctly, Wei Ying parted with your sect in peace. He has committed no crime and therefore I see no reason he should not be allowed at this event. Despite your sect’s presence.” Sect Leader Nie truly was in a mood. Wei Ying winced from hearing his tone alone… and from the feeling of Madam Yu’s nails digging even deeper into the flesh of his upper arm.

“He is our head disciple,” Huaisang stuttered out from behind his brother, “Please, Madam Yu, show some mercy, I beg you!”

Madam Yu’s face only twisted more. She scoffed dismissively but did release her hold on Wei Ying’s arm. “To name the son of a servant the head disciple over your own heir,” she said with a sneer, “You are young, Sect Leader Nie. Perhaps you don’t quite understand what kind of message that sends?”

It was a jab, an obvious one. Nie Mingjue sneered right back, ready to meet this challenge head-on. 

To everyone’s shock, it was Huaisang who responded first.

“My brother, like our father and your own revered husband, runs our Qinghe Nie on the basis of merit and effort. If there is a disciple who proves himself talented enough on the field and who has shown us his dedication to our cause, why should he not be given the chance to shine?” Huaisang didn’t raise his voice at all, but his blank tone spoke volumes. His stuttering was completely gone.

Then, seemingly coming to his senses, Huaisang bowed his head and his voice took on a self-deprecating lilt when he continued. Still, he didn’t stutter. “Your guidance and concern is much appreciated, Madam. But, with all due respect, while my cultivation may not be the strongest, my sensibilities are not so fragile. As long as Wei Ying deserves his title, all I can do is the right thing. That is to say, I can only back down graciously and improve on my own weaknesses.”

Polite, softly spoken, almost ladylike. Just subtly insulting enough to be a jab, just polite and submissive enough that rage could not be considered an appropriate response. And even though Wei Ying could hear the challenge in his young master’s tone, he knew that no one else in the room had the talent to rise up to it. It was masterful work. Wei Ying didn’t know whether to be impressed or horrified. On one hand, his young master had balls! On the other… this was Madam Yu. This level of disrespect was nothing Wei Ying could ever remember her being shown. Even in the face of Nie Mingjue, could she let this stand?

Madam Yu’s face turned a particular shade of puce. Wei Ying knew he had to think fast.

“Madam Yu, I-”

“A-Xian?”

Wei Ying’s mind blanked out. What was she doing here?

“A-Xian, so it really was you!” Jiang Yanli cried, stumbling towards Wei Ying with tears in her eyes. “I had thought so, but I didn’t dare hope—”

She was cut off my a small cough. Huaisang covered his mouth with a fan and his eyes locked onto Wei Ying’s. 

Wei Ying had been stepping towards her without even realizing it. He hadn't even realized that Madam Yu had let go of his arm when shijie entered the room. It was like the room had melted away and all there was left was shijie. His shijie, she was here. But he couldn’t afford to-to hug her. He couldn’t hold her. Her mother was right here. And, furthermore, so was Sect Leader Nie. Wei Ying couldn’t lose face for his sect leader like that--not when the man had so graciously plucked him from the streets as a disgraced ex-disciple and protected him, almost like an older brother would, with no regard to his own reputation. He couldn’t fall back into the arms of the lady of Yunmeng Jiang right before his own sect leader. 

Instead, Wei Ying sunk into a deep salute. “Jiang-guniang, you look well.”

It felt like he was choking. It felt worse when Wei Ying picked up his head and saw heartbroken tears streaming down Jiang Yanli’s gentle face. He couldn’t stop himself from reaching out a hand in some attempt at comforting her. 

She stepped back from his reach and shook her head, somehow managing a watery smile.

“It’s fine as long as you’re healthy. As long as your healthy, your shijie is very happy.”

Wei Ying felt tears prickling his eyes now. He had missed her. He’d missed her soft voice, the way she smiled and cried without reserve, the way she loved with all her heart. He’d gotten used to the warmth that the Nie brothers exuded--protective and enveloping. His new guardians had given him so much that he’d almost forgotten how much he missed her softer, supportive warmth and her gentle presence.

Apparently having had enough of this crying, Nie Mingjue marched forward and planted himself sternly between Wei Ying and the Jiangs.

“Madam Yu, Jiang-guniang, is there an official complaint you would like to file about my disciple?”

Jiang Yanli’s eyes widened in confusion. “Mother? Complaint? What complaint?”

With nothing but a backwards glare and a quick, mumbled farewell, Madam Yu grabbed her daughter and vacated the room. Jiang Yanli tried to tug back her arm but it was futile. Wei Ying waited until the two of them were out of sight before pressing his face into Nie Huaisang’s shoulder. A few tears slipped free involuntarily but he knew his friend wouldn’t say anything about it.

Sect Leader Nie looked as if he wanted to ask what precisely happened, to ask what exactly was said in the time that Wei Ying and the madam were alone, but, thankfully, thought better of it and stopped himself short.

“Give her a wide berth, Wei Ying,” Sect Leader Nie ordered gruffly, “Do not approach the Jiang Sect anymore. I mean it. And take Huaisang with you when you go wandering.”

To anyone else, it was a reproach. But Wei Ying had trained directly under the man for years now. He could hear the rough concern that bled into his sect leader’s voice. That’s right, he had a sect now. Sect Leader Nie had made a lot of concessions by taking him, a wandering ex-Jiang disciple, in as his head disciple. And that’s not even mentioning everything else him and his brother had done for him. Wei Ying couldn’t go around causing them trouble like this, crying at the mere sight of Jiang Yanli and casting doubts as to where his loyalties lay.

“I’ll stay with him!” Huaisang assured his brother before laying a gentle hand on Wei Ying’s head, which was still buried in his shoulder.

...He shouldn’t worry these people so.

“Understood, sect leader.”

---

Nie Huaisang took one look at Jiang Cheng and went sprinting back to his brother. He’d looked him right in the eyes, blanched, and turned the opposite direction.

It was a bit of an overreaction, right? It was definitely an insult, right? The only thing that kept Jiang Cheng from chasing the boy down and demanding an explanation was the memory of his parents’ expectations. 

“Try to make some friends, A-Cheng,” his father had said before waving him off on his journey, “You are always with your sister. It’ll be good for you to know some people your own age.”

“Do not lose us face,” his mother had commanded during one of the rare times they spoke nowadays. “Mind your manners and give the other sects a good impression of us. Remember who you represent.”

As loathe as Jiang Cheng was to admit it, the truth of the matter was exactly as his parents feared. His father was too genteel and distant to say it frankly and his mother was too stubborn to admit that her flesh and blood could have such a gaping flaw, but Jiang Cheng was not a popular boy. He didn’t need his parents subtle hints, he’s known for a while. Simply put, he didn’t have the skill to be popular. 

He’s tried to talk to others! He always tried to make a good impression. But, somehow, he always managed to say exactly the wrong thing. That is, assuming he managed to say anything at all. He just didn’t understand the point of small talk though, it was so… pointless! And, in the end, his frustration always built up until his thin temper inevitably snapped. Every. Single. Time.

People were just so testy and loud and… and, well, they didn’t tend to like him. 

Jiang Cheng hadn’t imagined his new classmates would be any different. 

That being said, Nie Huaisang’s reaction seemed a bit harsh. Jiang Cheng wasn’t even given the chance to say anything this time!

It wasn’t until he heard that ringing laugh that he understood.

His sister had told him that Wei Wuxian was happily living with the Nie’s now. Jiang Cheng had tried his best to put the image of Wei Wuxian living a whole other life out of his mind. But here was the truth dancing around in forest-green regalia right before his eyes. Here was Wei Wuxian in the flesh.

Wei Wuxian in green and gold. 

So, he really did flee to Qinghe then. Rather than come home, rather than answer any of Jiang Cheng’s multiple attempts to find him, he fled to another sect. He found a new family too, by the looks of it. 

Jiang Cheng watched as Wei Wuxian snatched Nie Huaisang’s fan from his hand, keeping it just out of reach when the other boy lunged for it. He hadn’t changed one bit. Apparently, it didn’t matter where he lived or who he lived with. Apparently, so long as Wei Wuxian could laugh loudly and mess around as much as he wanted to, it made no difference to him what colors he wore.

Apparently, Jiang Cheng had been playing the part of the fool, still keeping robes that didn’t belong to him waiting in a closet. Apparently only one of them was moronic enough to believe that Wei Wuxian would ever don purple again.

Green robes fluttered in the air as Wei Wuxian dodged yet another attempt to retrieve the fan.

“Give it back, Wuxian!” Nie Huaisang moaned with a pout. 

“Nuh uh. Tell me what’s got you so in a tizzy first. What do you mean I ought to go home? Who was it that bugged your brother into sending me with you?” Wei Wuxian laughed, twirling the fan around in his hands as he easily danced around the slower Nie Huaisang.

“That was then and this is now! Go back home with my brother!” Nie Huaisang ordered with as much authority as he could muster. Which wasn’t a lot, if Jiang Cheng was being honest. It certainly wasn’t enough to move someone as facetious as Wei Wuxian.

“Huaisang, I flew for three days to get here. I packed for two days before that. And now you’re telling me to turn around at the gates? After all that, I’m not to be allowed to enjoy the splendor of the legendary Cloud Recesses from inside? Young Master Nie, you are a cruel one!”

He looked so happy.

“Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng called out before he could even think about what he was doing. He hadn’t yelled, but Wei Wuxian’s head snapped up all the same. The teasing smile slid off his face and all the color drained from his cheeks as he turned towards Jiang Cheng.

“Jiang Cheng,” he croaked, mouth opening as if he had more to say but couldn’t quite force out the words.

“Wuxian…” Nie Huaisang murmured. He twisted his sleeve nervously, glancing back and forth between Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian as they stared at each other.

“Young Master Jiang, we had no idea you’d be attending,” Nie Huaisang warbled out when the silence got to be too much. “Is your father with you? I’m sure my brother would love to greet him.”

“He had other duties. He saw me off at the pier,” Jiang Cheng answered automatically. He hadn’t meant to sound so short, but he couldn’t particularly be bothered with small talk at the moment. He could hear the blood pounding in his ears and he felt a bit lightheaded. 

He had a million things he wanted to say and, yet, none of it felt appropriate anymore. He wanted to beg Wei Wuxian to come back, but how could he? He wanted to yell at him for leaving in the first place, but what could have been done about that? That his mother had been wrong? That their family was closer to the breaking point than it had ever been before? That they needed him back? No, there was no way Jiang Cheng would allow himself to say any of that. He wasn’t that desperate. And, pride aside, there was one other thing that he wanted to say first. He wanted to tell him… 

What? What exactly was it that Jiang Cheng wanted to say? The longer the silence lasted, the less Jiang Cheng knew. All he did know was that he was dangerously close to blurting out something ridiculously sappy, something he’d never allow himself to say to the man who abandoned him.

And why the hell wasn’t Wei Wuxian speaking? Wasn’t that his best talent? Wasn’t his mouth supposed to be his defining feature?

“Wei Wuxian, what’s the matter with you?” Nie Mingjue asked, having realized something was wrong with his head disciple and coming over to check things out. 

The hulking figure of Nie Mingjue blocked Jiang Cheng’s view and, just like that, the moment was over. 

Jiang Cheng flipped his sleeves and turned the opposite direction. He saw Nie Huaisang sag in relief when he did. 

Fine. He could take a hint. Wei Wuxian wore green and gold now and Jiang Cheng had no business poking at him anymore. Understood.

Jiang Cheng headed towards the gates of the Cloud Recesses and didn’t turn back once, not even as he remembered what it was he had wanted to say.

...

“Wei Wuxian, I’ve missed you.”

[iwillhaveamoonbase]

The Long Game ch. 6

Soren ran a hand through his hair, checking his teeth as he looked in the mirror.  Rayla had agreed to go to the market in town with him and there was no way he was going to mess it up.  He’d been pining for Rayla for too long.  “Done looking at yourself, Soren?”

Soren’s back straightened immediately and he turned to see his father, disapproval clear on his face. “Just getting ready for my date, Dad.”

“With Rayla, I presume.”

Soren grinned.  “Yep.  She actually agreed to going somewhere with me.”

Viren nodded, walking up to Soren.  It was quiet for a few tense moments, Viren casting him a critical eye.  “Make sure you get her attention and keep it.  Rayla is Harrow’s ward and Claudia is trying to get Prince Callum to give her the proper attention she deserves as a lady of her station.  Our connection as a family can only strengthen if at least one of you marries one of them.”

Soren’s brows furrowed. “But, I like Rayla for Rayla. Besides, it’s not like Callum and Rayla like each other.”

Viren scoffed as he shook his head.  “Are you that blind?  Do whatever you must do, Soren, but make sure you get Rayla’s attention and keep it.” Viren moved to leave the room, pausing at the door.  “And, Soren,” Soren looked over at him, “make sure that, no matter what, you have the needs of the family in mind at all times.  After all, the three of us only have each other.”

Soren gulped.  “We have Harrow, Ezran, and Callum.  Even Amaya-”

“How did I raise a fool for a son?”  Soren clamped his mouth shut, looking down at the ground.  “Harrow is trying to force us out.  So is Amaya and Callum.”

“They just don’t like dark magic.  If you and Claudia stopped, it would be fine, Dad.”

“And risk the elves coming in and killing us all?  Stop practicing our main means of defense?  I don’t think so.”

Soren stayed quiet as Viren went on about the history of dark magic and all the good it’s done. He’d heard this a million times before.  Soren didn’t really get Callum and Rayla’s or even Harrow and Amaya’s hang-ups with dark magic, but he also didn’t get why his family was so enamored by it.  It was a tool, right?  Only good or bad depending on how it was used.  His father had once healed his sickly body so he could be a crown guard while dark magic was also responsible for loss of life.  “Got to go, Dad,” Soren mumbled, walking out.  

There was only so much of Viren he could take anymore.  Something had changed in his father since the day he and Harrow had left to kill the Dragon King.  He mumbled to himself far more than before, looked at mirrors more, and had even started becoming obsessed with primal magic to a degree Soren couldn’t remember his father being.  It was almost like he was a man possessed, but, perhaps, that obsession had always existed in Viren.

Soren smiled when he saw Rayla waiting for him in the courtyard, her long hair in a side braid and her long legs clad in pants.  Even leaning against a wall, hands in her pockets, she gave an air of knowing everything that was happening around her.  She almost felt dangerous some days, like she was watching and waiting for a chance to do something.

He was about to shout out a greeting to her when he saw the soft smile on her face directed at Callum, who Soren was only now noticing was also there.  Callum had his sketchbook open and was gesturing wildly with his hands. Rayla nodded along, her head thrown back and laughing at something Soren was too far away to hear.  He was about to announce his presence when Callum reached out a hand and lightly stroked Rayla’s cheek.  Soren paused, watching while Rayla’s eyes moved to Callum’s lips and she didn’t swat his hand away.  

Even from where he was, Soren could sense the unspoken tension and want in the air between Rayla and Callum.  Callum leaned in a tad before pulling away, his hand also falling.  Rayla stayed still, eyes still locked on his.  Their lips moved and Soren caught a few words: ‘sorry’, ‘dirt’, ‘fun’.  Callum finally moved away, walking towards the castle and away from Rayla, though she watched him go with longing in her blue eyes.

Soren’s eyes narrowed for a moment before sighing.  Well, his father may have been right, but maybe this date would change her mind. The look she gave him when she noticed his presence was friendly, but not filled with the same longing he had seen in her before.  “Hey, Soren. We ready to go?”

Soren nodded.  “Yep.  I’m surprised you even agreed to come with me.”

Rayla shrugged.  “I need a gift for Ezran’s birthday. Besides, you tend to be decent company most days.”

Soren grinned, running a hand through his hair.  “Oh? Only decent?”

Rayla nodded.  “Yep.  Trust me, that’s a compliment.”  They went through the town and looked for gifts for Ezran.  They chatted and mumbled about what he would and wouldn’t like, bemoaning how hard it was to shop for a kid who could have anything he wanted with the snap of his fingers but always said he didn’t want anything.  “I knew I should have asked Callum to come.  He’s so much better at this than I am.”

Soren shrugged.  “Yeah, the step-prince is good at that.”

Ralya’s whole demeanor went icy, slowly turning to him.  “Why do you keep calling him that?  It’s not nice.  You’re better than that, Soren.”

“Well, I’ve known him almost our whole lives and-”

“I don’t care.  He’s the prince.  Even if he’s not the heir, that doesn’t change that Harrow raised him.”

“I know.  It’s just-. Harrow loves him more than my dad loves me, I think.  I guess it’s a way to make me feel better.”

“Does it really make you feel better?”

“…No.”

“Then stop.”  Soren nodded, hoping Rayla would drop it.  He felt a lot worse now than he had in a while, not only because Rayla was scolding him, but because it was becoming increasingly obvious that Rayla held a soft spot for Callum she simply did not hold for him.  

“OK.”

“Thank you.”

“Why do you even care?”

“Because it hurts Callum that you do that.  It’s like you’re trying to keep him down.  I don’t appreciate that, to be honest.  You pick on his insecurities concerning Harrow.  Your parents may have divorced, but you were still raised by your dad. You can’t know what life is like for Callum.”

“What about your parents?” Rayla raised a brow.  “You never talk about them.”

Rayla shrugged.  “What’s there to talk about?  I was raised by them until I was five and then was raised by their two friends.  I get Callum a bit more because I understand wanting that connection.  I get that grief of losing someone you love and not having easy access to people who are willing to or even can talk about them.  Your mom hurt you and your dad is an ass, but don’t take it out on Callum anymore.  Got it?”

“Got it.”  They finally decided on getting Ezran a book on animals that neither had seen in the library to be from Rayla and, from Soren, a new hair oil from Del Bar that was supposed to be good for curls.  They were quiet on the way back to the castle, the comradery gone.  “Are you in love with Callum?” Soren asked.  He had to know.

Rayla didn’t turn to Soren. He couldn’t read her posture or her half-hidden expression.  “People really need to stop pushing us together,” she whispered.  Before Soren could ask anymore, Rayla walked by him with a muttered ‘thank you.’  Soren didn’t know what to make of it, but, as far as he could tell, he still had a shot. Rayla hadn’t said ‘yes’, so maybe, he had misunderstood what he had seen earlier.  Rayla just thought of Callum as a good friend.  He hadn’t gotten confirmation that it was a date, but he hadn’t been told it wasn’t one either.  It was his first big victory in his plans to finally court the elusive ward of Katolis.

---------------------------------------------------

“FUCK!” Rayla screamed in her pillow when she finally got to her room. “Damn the Sources!”  Rayla raised her eyes and looked at the moon. Even Soren had figured it out.  Were the gods mocking her?  If even Soren had picked up on her being in love with Callum, how long would it be before this became too difficult to keep to herself?  Could she even fulfill her mission?

Tears of frustration ran down her cheeks as she tried to control her breathing.  She wasn’t so sure she could fulfill her mission anymore. Ezran didn’t deserve to die.  She knew that.  He clearly had no knowledge that the Dragon King was even dead or what had happened to the egg.  As for Harrow, well, Rayla wasn’t sure how much of the plot against the Dragon King was him and how much of it was Viren.  This was why she had come, wasn’t it?  To gather information…but the hit was out for Harrow and Ezran.  If they didn’t die, then Viren and Soren had to die.  Viren probably deserved it, but Soren?  No, Soren hadn’t been there and while Rayla had her suspicions that Soren and Claudia knew what had happened, she wasn’t so sure that they were involved or even approved of it.

Rayla lay in bed for hours, her mind awash in confusion.  She had a mission.  She had to fulfill the mission, even if she thought it was wrong.  Rayla turned back to the moon.  But Callum…was she willing to throw away a future with him for the mission?  If she just let go, could she be happy with him?  Would she even be able to hide the truth for that long?  Probably not.  Their children would be halflings.  How would she explain that?  Why did this have to be so complicated?  

‘I never should have come here.  I’m messing up.  I messed up. I feel in love with the target’s son…I’m worse than my parents.’  Rayla didn’t dare think it, but she couldn’t deny the truth any longer: if Callum told her he loved her and wanted to be with her, she would abandon her old life and stay with him as long as he was willing to have her.  Surprisingly, it was a lot more freeing to admit to herself than to keep locked up in her heart.  Perhaps, the time was coming for her to go home.  Could she even without completing the mission?

Rayla didn’t sleep that night and no further clarity came to her.  No matter what choice she made, she was leaving behind those she loved.  No matter her decision, someone was going to suffer and she was going to be the cause of it.  As much as she wanted to be with Callum, she also still wanted Runaan and Ethari and even Tiadrin and Lain in her life.  Even though they had betrayed the Dragon King, she still wanted all four of her parents.  But, one thing had become crystal clear to her: the long she stayed, the harder the choice would be.  She had to make a choice soon.  Callum was fast approaching 18, old enough to court under the law and a lot of people were already expecting him to choose her.  Could she give him that choice?  Rayla wasn’t sure, even if that’s what she wanted most in her heart.    

[bellatrixobsessed1]

Speak No Evil (Part 13)

The hand comes down from the stars, it brushes over her cheeks. It is soft and it is loving. Warm and kind. She brings her own hand up to it and strokes the back of it. The stars overhead shift and swirl and glimmer and wink. She thinks that they might be singing or humming. It is a sweet sound. A lulling sound. Like the lullabies she had been deprived of.

It is strange, she thinks, to sleep when you’re already sleeping. But she finds herself curling up and drifting off as the stars fall around her is teeny twinkling bursts. They shower sparkles over her until her skin is enticingly and richly spangled with them. She feels celestial. Ethereal. They dust her lashes and glittery her hair. She feels pleasantly absent.

And the humming grows. She opens her mouth and the stars flutter onto her tongue. When she swallows them they taste of powdered sugar and passionfruit. She thinks that there is a hint of blueberry. And somehow she is certain that these are the tastes of the cosmos, truly.

They stars swirl around her and they ask her if she is okay. She nods. They tell her that, that is good. She nods again. They tell her that it is fine, that she can talk to them. She says that she doesn’t know what to talk about--her voice tastes like blackberry and cherry. They ask her if she is awake.

She rolls over and rubs the blur out of her eyes. Her lower lip trembles and she can’t say why. The rays of the sun cast a light on longing. Longing for what they have stolen from her by falling over her face.

“Are you awake?” Seicho asks.

She sits up a sweep of sleep tangled locks spill over her shoulders.

“Oh good, because I’m hungry and I’m having trouble getting the fire started.”

Azula wants to ask her why she doesn’t just use her bending but she can’t find her parchment.

“Did you sleep well?”

Azula nods.

She smiles, “you didn’t wake up in the middle of the night for once. I can tell you a story before bed again if it helps.”

She isn’t sure that that has anything to do with her ability to stay asleep, neither is she sure that she doesn’t want another story.

.oOo.

Her party is small. Small and foreign. Not one of them knows any of the others. And that’s where the real excitement lies. They have a whole glimmering glacier to explore, and yet the thrill lies in exploring each other. Navigating each other’s brains and auras and personalities until they know them as sure as their own.

TyLee is certain that they don't see it this way. They probably aren’t thinking of auras at all. They are thinking of adventure and sightseeing and once in a lifetime views. She is thinking of the very same. But she is anticipating the fireside conversations much more than anything the glaciers and their tunnels will have to offer.

There is something enticing about being one of the first Fire Nationals to embark on a wintery expedition. Much of the trek to the glacier is uneventful, she finds herself fully engrossed in keeping her footing in the snow and not losing sight of her party when the snow begins to fall more intensely. And the weight of her pack isn’t so pleasant either, she isn’t used to carrying something so heavy for so long.

A quick scan of their faces shows that her companions wouldn’t be up for conversation either, even if she had been. Apparently even the seasoned explorers are struggling. She wonders what they must make of her. Likely they think she is a burden. She wonders if she is slowing them down. If they resent her for it, if they regret bringing her along.

She isn’t watching her footing, she stumbles and topples into the snow.

“You alright down there?” The woman extends a hand.

“I’m fine, really cold though.” She shivers and shakes the snow out of her hair. “I just can’t get the hang of these things.” She lifts her snowshoes one after the other.

One of the men laughs, “usually takes more than one trip to get used to them.”

“You had to get used to them?”

“I’m from the Earth Kingdom. The part I live in doesn’t get much snow.”

She readjusts her snowshoes and they continue. She finds the silence to be slightly less uncomfortable. How funny it is that breaking the ice beneath her feet would be a conversational ice breaker.

.oOo.

Azula is growing used to the hike. Growing used to feeling sticky and dirty. She supposes that if she can adjust to the discomforts of a straightjacket then other, lesser, discomforts will be manageable.

“We should be at the ruins tomorrow.” Seicho notes as she douses the fire.

‘Good’ Azula writes. She is running out of parchment, energy, and willpower. More often than not she finds herself distant. She thinks of the stars of their powdered sugar and passionfruit tang. She wonders if that is what the Spirit World is like. She wonders if the Spirit World would be kind to her given her history or if she’d just be swapping one pain for a new kind.

Whatever the case, she finds that she likes sleeping and dreaming more than she enjoys the physical world. And Agni, she had only had one dream. Just a small taste was more than enough to leave her yearning for something kinder.

For a world where there are only twinkling galaxies and sweetly murmuring voices. For a world where her own voice can murmur. For a world where she has nothing to atone for. No one to miss because no one else exists.

She thinks that TyLee would have liked the starry hand… She stares up at the ceiling of the tent. How many times has she shifted positions now? She closes her eyes and tries to dream. But her head is cluttered. Cluttered with old arguments on a steady replay and visions of tears. The sound her TyLee’s wimpers play in her mind with such clarity that she might as well be next to her.

She rolls over again and grips her hands over her head. It will be over soon, she promises herself. One way or the other she will have sleep and quiet.

“Hey.” Seicho whispers.

Azula inhales sharply and turns to face her.

“Trouble sleeping?”

She wonders what gave her the first clue.

“I can tell you about the time when I found the ruins.” Azula nods and inches a little closer to the woman. She cannot sleep so she will settle for a story. For a lesser escape.

.oOo.

“I thought that we’d have reached the glacier by now.” Says the woman who had helped her up. Evidently TyLee has been thinking the same.

“It’s a day or so out yet, Tuya.” Says the eldest of the group. “We’ll make it there by sun down tomorrow. “For now we’ll set up camp and make ourselves cozy.”

“How do we get cozy and warm in a place like this?” TyLee asks.

It would seem that it is quite simple; the right gear and a well maintained fire are the key elements. A communal tent  and a warm meal are important aspects. The Earthbender, Keyhyun, stirs a fine soup. She hasn’t tasted it yet but it smells pleasant.

“So, Keyhyun, what brings you from the Earth Kingdom to the poles?” Tuya asks. She points at the eldest man, “Tanak is an archeologist and Natuk makes a hobby of exploring glaciers, what about you?”

Keyhyun shrugs. “Earth Kingdom gets boring after a while. Where I come from it’s all rolling grasslands and some hills.”

“So you traded plain grasslands for plain snow mounds?” Natuk nudges the man.

“At least snow mounds glitter. Grass just…” he makes a swishing gesture.

They share a laugh.

“What about you?” Tuya asks. “We never get Fire Nationals.”

“And I’ve had too many of them.” She tries to laugh.

“Good one.” Natuk slaps his knee.

“Glad that we have a least one clever person on this trip.” Tuya comments.

TyLee’s tummy flutters, the grin that spreads across her face is near involuntary. Clever! Someone thinks that she is clever!  Usually clever is Azula’s job…

And maybe it isn’t that she was never clever. Maybe it was that Azula preferred her to keep silent and let her do all of the planning. Maybe it was that Azula didn’t hadn’t given her a chance to be clever. Maybe it was that Mai saw her as clueless and she didn’t have the will or desire to be anything else. Not when that would set a higher bar. She bites the inside of her cheek; maybe the two of them had been holding her back. And maybe doing so made them feel more secure.

Indeed, she has had too many Fire Nationals. Too many standards and ill tempers and rigid perfection…

“Your soup’s ready.” Keyhyun announces.

Tanak passes her a bowl. Her smile returns.

.oOo.

She isn’t sure at first, what she is seeing. At first she thinks that the woman has eaten something poisonous during their trek. Her silent shudders are haunting. Seicho isn’t sure what she will do if the woman stops moving. Her concern waynes only slightly when it occurs to her that the woman isn’t seizing, she is crying. Quietly crying. She doesn’t know why she hadn’t considered that the woman couldn’t even utter a sound to cry.

And somehow it is more haunting than a forlorn wail piercing the night. It is such a silent sorrow. Frankly, she isn’t sure that the woman would make a sound even if she could. And she ponders upon whether or not she should approach the woman at all. But Agni does it hurt to see her like this.

“Hey.” She finally musters up the courage.

The woman doesn’t turn. She wraps her arms more tightly around herself.

Hesitantly, Seicho reaches out and touches the woman’s arm. She jerks and tenses. “Sorry.” She mutters, feeling the woman relax once more. Relax as far as she can, anyhow. She still shakes slightly beneath her hand. “Do you want to write what’s wrong? I can get you your parchment.”

The woman doesn’t move. Seicho gently rubs her upturned arm. “I can hold you. I’m good at hugging people.” It is a stupid thing to offer. Not once during this trip has the woman indicated that she liked being touched, much less held. She doesn’t know what else to do. “Do you want to hear another story?”

This time the woman turns to face her.

“Here.” She dabs at the woman’s wet cheeks. “Do you want to hear more about the Hope Stone or do you want to hear one about a woman who wears a coconut mask?”

The woman points to the little flap on the ceiling and to the stars that shine through.

“Okay, Hope Stone it is.”

[sadpoemsandsteverogers]

cornelia’s ↬ auston matthews

A/N: hey all, it’s been a while. here’s an imagine about toronto maple leafs player auston matthews. this is unedited so please forgive me for any mistakes. thanks for sticking with me as i work through writer’s block and a whole bunch of other things. love you. 

Warnings: swearing, mature-ish themes, reader is a bit hard on themselves cause #feelings. 

Word count: 2.8k words

___________________________

Looking up at the flashing neon sign, you mentally cursed yourself out, a soft sigh and a few utterances of the word “fuck” following. 

You should have told Mitch no, you should have told Mitch no.

Your conscience repeated the words until you felt like smashing your head against the wall of the club. When Mitch invited you to go out with some old friends, you knew Auston would be there. It was what deterred you at first, but you quickly came to the realization that they were your friends, too. You had just as much of a right to see them. Besides, you needed to get them to stop asking why you didn’t hang around as much anymore. 

They didn’t need to know why, and you hated being reminded every time they asked. 

You hated being reminded of the way Auston’s lips would trail along the shell of your ear, the edge of your jaw, the swell of your breast, the curve of your hip, and... 

Stop thinking about him.

Your fling with Auston was a well-kept secret. That’s all it was after all, a fling. Just two people sleeping with each other, nothing more. Two people, who didn’t sleep with other people, but made each other jealous just for the intense, rough outcome. Two people who were good friends, sleeping together because it was convenient for the both of them. 

It was a fling, nothing more. 

Well, it was, until you noticed the way your gaze began to linger on him. Your hugs became longer, your hands trailed slower, and your thoughts were completely consumed by him. When you received good news, he was the first one you wanted to tell. Your promotion at work? He was the first person that popped into your head. Seeing two cute dogs on your walk back from the coffee shop? Auston’s name came to mind. 

That worried you. There was absolutely no way you could develop feelings for him. He was him and you were you and that was enough, at least in your mind. You stopped it while you still had control, while you still had restraint. 

It was three months since you had told Auston you wanted to end your arrangement- if you could even call it that. The rules and boundaries were unspoken but understood, which left you both even more confused. Your liaison, affair of the heart, involvement- whatever the fuck it was, was over. Auston agreed with no arguments. He respected you and agreed to end it, no questions asked. 

No questions, specifically because you gave him no chance to ask any. It left him confused, and hurt. One night you were in his arms, your head resting on one of his pillows with drool seeping out of your slightly-parted lips, and the next, you were cold and closed off. He rarely saw you after your last night together. He saw you at two events, but you had left before he could approach you. You avoided him and it hurt. But, he knew that you had wanted to move on. You wanted something else, someone else. Auston respected that. He wanted you to be happy and if your late night rendezvous were not making you happy, he had no qualms with ending them. 

No qualms, right? After all, you were just two friends, who sometimes slept together. Nothing serious, nothing bound, nothing set-in-stone.

So why did it hurt so much? 

Entering the club, you felt the heat wash over you like a wave. Bodies were moving and heat came off of each one in waves, drowning every person in the building. Maneuvering your way through the crowd, you worked towards the area of the club Mitch said the group was at. Each step towards the large corner booth was accompanied by a fearful cry from your heart.

Please don’t!

Turn around!

I’m not ready!

Not Auston, not yet!

Get the hell out of here!

What are you doing, you dumb bitch! Turn around! 

But you ignored every single one. There was no use in running away like the other two times. Auston is still a person, you still have the same friend group, and avoiding both like the plague was not the answer. 

Hoping to slip into the conversation without drawing attention to yourself, you shied behind some of the other wives and girlfriends. But it could not hide you from the eagle eyes of William Nylander.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, sliding out of the booth and pulling you into a hug. Your wrapped your arms around the slightly-tipsy right wing, a chuckle leaving your lips as his weight crashed into you. 

“Hey, Nylander.” 

“Long time no see, stranger,” Morgan quipped, pushing Will away and pulling you in for a side hug. 

You smiled up at him, “Getting that tooth replaced anytime soon?”

Mo shook his head, “Not until I lose one or two more. Season’s just started.” 

You laughed, greeting the rest of the group with hugs and playful jabs. 

Your eyes locked with Auston’s, and your heartbeat instantly sped up. He raised his glass towards you and nodded, and you nodded in return. A soft smile crossed his lips and you couldn’t help but mirror his actions. 

“C’mon, Y/N, we need to get you out on that dance floor!” Kasperi grabbed one hand while Steph grabbed the other, practically dragging you to the dance floor. Your dancing with the large group remained humorous, your intentions far from sexy. There was no one to impress, no one to seduce, no one you intended on teasing. Just a night out with some friends, with no plan of playing games. 

As an upbeat song ended, you announced to the group, “I need to get a drink!” 

Walking off of the dance floor and making your way towards the bar, your eyes found Auston, who had already been watching you. Noticing how long you had been staring at one another, you offered a sheepish smile and rubbed the back of your neck, turning away. Your eyes widened and you exhale deeply, still continuing towards the bar. 

Your conscience kept trying to nag you about how your body was reacting, especially at the fact you were so nervous over Auston’s mere gaze. You were all sorts of nervous, the feelings you had for him surfaced each time you thought about the way he looked at you. There was something so sweet in his eyes, yet it was mixed with what looked like hurt. 

The look in his eyes haunted you as you ordered your drink of choice and perched upon a barstool. You made conversation with Freddie when he came up to the bar to get another beer, and you did the same with Mitch and Tyson when they tried dragging you back out on the dance floor. You gave in for a few songs, but made your way back to your barstool to get a water. Sweat was already pooling at the base of your neck from the dancing and the closeness of the crowd. It had been a long time since you had let your body just move the way it felt lead to. No hands holding onto your hips, no one behind you to push your ass into, just you and the rhythm. 

Auston found himself jealous of the rhythm. He watched from his spot in the booth as you moved to the music. He laughed as you busted out the sprinkler, used the lasso on Freddie, and even the running man. He smiled as you slow danced with Steph to a Bruno Mars song, watching as you and her sang animatedly. His smile grew wider when he saw you headbanging to a Good Charlotte song along, and laughed again when you and Trevor smacked into each other.

The loving gaze and light air around him was stripped when you returned to the dance floor after your first drink. Your moves were a bit different. You were a little bit more in tune with your Cuban motion this time around, hips rolling to the beat in perfect time. Your feet move in a pattern you had picked up a long time ago at a dance class, performing a basic rumba with nobody but the cadence of the music. It held you in frame, keeping you close. The cadence did what any good lead would do: it showed off the follow. Auston felt like an onlooker at a dancing competition and found himself wishing to be your invisible partner.

As he watched you exit the dance floor and go back to your seat at the bar, an idea popped into his head. He was not sure it was a good one, but back when you were together- no, back when you were sleeping together, it always caught your attention. It was cruel and tantalizing and somewhat masochistic but you and Auston liked to play that game. It was nothing serious, except for when your eyes locked and the challenge was made aware. 

Who would break first? Who would cast aside the body they were using and signal that it was time to go? Who would get the last laugh before the two were engaged in a bruising kiss? 

Sliding out of the booth, Auston asked the first girl he saw to dance. She accepted, and he led her onto the dance floor. It was a slower song, but the beat was sensual and Auston almost felt intimidated by what could happen. He wished the girl pressed against him was you, but he didn’t think he could ask you to dance. He knew what it would lead to: a two person tango that lasted for hours, with you leaving in the morning and him wishing you would stay. 

Finishing your water, you were about to go back out onto the dance floor when you decided to cast a glance over to the corner booth. Your eyes widened a bit when you saw that Auston wasn’t there. For some damned reason, you did a sweep of the club, wanting to find him. 

When you found him, you regretted it.

His hips were moving in time with that of a stranger’s; and your heart was shattering on the ground. 

He felt your gaze and locked eyes with you, sending you the same smirk he always did when he was trying to make you crack. He had almost convinced himself you were going to send a smirk back, and that you would be grabbing the first person who walked past to start playing the game you once were so good at.

But you didn’t want games. You didn’t want childish jealousy and unspoken words; and a part of you knew that Auston’s intentions weren’t hurtful. 

But it still hurt.

To see him move so easily with another person’s body, a person who wasn’t you, caused your lungs to feel like they were filling up with water. 

You broke his gaze and darted for the exit, weaving through bodies and casting out apologies when you bumped harshly into someone. Your hands grasped the cool handle of the door and pushed it open, stumbling out onto the sidewalk and letting out ragged breaths as the fresh oxygen entered your system. 

Turning to your right, you noticed the sign of a familiar diner, Cornelia’s, a few blocks down, and decided that food sounded really good right now.

Waiting at stoplights and walking through crosswalks, you thought about what just happened inside the club. 

What just happened? You realized you want something real with someone who wants a warm body. 

You mentally barked at yourself to shut up. The last thing you needed was a lecture from yourself, especially this late at night and especially after all that dancing. 

Entering the diner, you settled into the baby blue booth with a sigh, slipping your heels off and setting them next to you. You pulled your legs up underneath you, grabbing a menu and beginning to flip through it. The action was pointless, as you already knew what you were going to get. You used to frequent this diner with Auston, because why wouldn’t you? Of course it was the first place you ran. 

Your internal beat down was halted when a waitress came to take your order. Coffee, pancakes, and some bacon sounded like heaven while you yourself felt like you were in hell. 

Waiting for your food, you let your eyes trail over the diner’s interior. Memories with your friends flashed through your mind as you recalled late nights, early mornings, and mid-afternoon breakfasts with them at this place. Sometimes you and Auston would come here the morning after one of your nights together, getting breakfast with the both of you in the clothes from the night before- but a sweater or jacket of his would be around your shoulders. You would talk and laugh and debate about everything, and the more you thought about it the more you realized how easily you had fallen in love with him.

Love.

So that’s what it was?

All the times you felt fuzzy when he pressed a kiss to your forehead post-sex, or when he would pull you closer in his sleep and nuzzle his head into the crook of your neck, or the way your stomach would flutter when he would throw his head back and laugh, or how airy you felt when he would just look at you.

As you ate your pancakes in an oddly melancholic silence, the bell hanging above the diner door went off and a new customer entered. You paid no mind until you felt someone’s presence in front of you. 

Looking up, you saw Auston with a guilty expression on his face. 

“Can I sit down?” he asked.

You nodded, grabbing your napkin and wiping the edges of your mouth as you finished chewing the pieces of pancake in your mouth. 

“What I did back there was... stupid. We don’t... we don’t do that anymore. I don’t know what came over me.” Auston spoke softly, “I’m sorry. I overstepped.”

You nodded, “Yeah.” 

You didn’t say anymore; you couldn’t. You were not entirely confident with yourself and the words that could fly out at any moment. Words you might regret, or might not. But the coin could land on either side and you did not even want to toss it in the air. 

“How have you been?” he asked.

It was a simple question that threw you off of a ledge you didn’t even know you were standing on.

“Please don’t do that.” you said softly.

“Do what?” 

You shook your head, scoffing slightly, “Care. Please don’t.”

Auston’s eyebrows furrowed, “What do you mean? I care about you, Y/N. I just wanna know how you’ve been. We’re friends, after all.” 

Saying the word ‘friends’ hurt him as much as it hurt you. 

“Friends who used to fuck.” The sentence fell bluntly from your lips.

“Is that what this is about? Are you uncomfortable with us being friends after our... thing?” 

You sighed in frustration, shaking your head, “No, Auston, not because of our thing. We never had a thing.”

“Okay, we never had a thing. So what’s wrong?” he asked, leaning forward and looking into your eyes deeply.

You leaned, back, moving your eyes to the condiment holder perched on the wall.

“Y/N, please talk to me. Please.” he asked.

Letting out a sigh, you straightened your posture, meeting his eyes.

“I’m upset because we never had a thing, Auston. A real thing,” you started, “like a relationship. A romance. It was more than just fucking for me. And when I realized that, I stopped it while I still could because it would hurt less than getting myself in too deep. I knew that what you did tonight wasn’t with malicious intent, I do. But I don’t want games anymore, Auston. I just want you. That’s it.” 

He was silent for a few moments, which set off the alarms in your head. 

Maybe that was a bad idea, you thought.

“I want you too.” 

The panic went away at those four words. 

Four simple words, that when pushed together, made you the happiest person alive. 

“No more games,” he continued, “no more hurting each other because of the outcome. We can have crazy, hot sex without the games.” His words made you both laugh, because you both knew it was true, “So, let’s avoid beating around the bush,” he paused briefly and looked around at the diner’s interior, admiring the 1950′s style decor, “be my girl?” 

You played along, “Auston Matthews, are you asking me to go steady with you?” 

“I’ll buy you a milkshake, give you my class ring, the whole shebang, baby.” 

You laughed at his cheesy lines, “Alright, I’ll be your girlfriend. Now, how about that milkshake?”