#sakura and shikamaru are actually the worst ones for this

[teatitty]

Rookie 9 but for the first few months whenever they have to give a mission report they have no idea who to give it to without Iruka at the desk because they're so used to giving written work to him from their school days it just doesn't initially compute in their 12 year old brains that there are other adults to give said work to now

Kurenai and Kakashi are trying desperately to hold in their cuteness aggression about it [and failing]

[kakashixhatakesxwhore]

Most to least experienced in bed? Konoha 11 and whoever else you wanna add. Love your work 😩😩

alrighty, i switched this up a bit to avoid strange research, if you wanna see someone else/another group ranking, lmk - i hope this is up to code, and thank you for the request!!

Sex Tier List

Ranked: Konoha 11 (Naruto, Sakura, Shikamaru, Ino, Choji, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Neji, Lee, Tenten) + Sand Siblings (Kankuro, Temari, Gaara) + Sasuke

Warnings: swearing, x(GN)reader implications, we are talking about sex, uh idk lmk if something makes you uncomfy

Notes: Boruto era for everyone, and, for everyone, their Bortuo era! this request had me fucked up lowk because, canonically, these mfs got zero action without rings - so we're putting an enjoyment spin on it, worst to best, in a modern-ish au. as in, who you would have to guide, vs, who could rock your world, five times over, in one night.

Masterlist💿

Tier 3 - Passable🪙

5. Hinata

I'm not even sorry. She deffo just lies there. Never gets on top. You have to ask for anything and everything, and not even in a sexy, teasing way, more in a 'I don't want to feel like I'm fucking a wooden board' way.

4. Kiba

May God love him because this man is certainly a selfish lover. That's not to say he isn't good - he's great at getting himself off, his brain just kinda shuts off otherwise. If you wanna cum, the onus is on you, because he's fuck-drunk within seconds of you touching him.

3. Kankuro

He's trying, okay?? It's just really fucking hard to keep you in mind when you just feel so fucking good. Kankuro's just inconsistent - that's the main issue. He'll try a million different positions in one session and is always unintentionally edging you.

2. Lee

Now, our darling, Rock Lee, is trying his best, honestly and truly. However, he doesn't know anything about anything, and you have to guide him every now and again. He's got the enthusiasm down, he's just not very good at translating it into pure sexual energy on the fly.

1. Gaara

He's too busy to be good at sex. When he does find the time, y'all get extra down and dirty, but Gaara's still lowkey inexperienced and the irregularity of your encounters doesn't help.

Tier 2 - Good🪩

5. Choji

Bro's got hidden talents, aight? It's a matter of him wanting to utilize them that sets Choji up. Most nights, he's chilling, but on those key few nights, hot damn.

4. Sasuke

I would've put him lower but y'all would've been mad - it's called REALISM. Sasuke would be wayyyyy too busy to put in the work to develop any actual skill in the bedroom, and he would find researching for it so far past disgusting. His good grace would be his natural endowment and prowess, but he's on thin fucking ice.

3. Tenten

Surprisingly stone top vibes, I cannot lie. She deffo gets off on your pleasure, but she's down here because she's kinda bad at first. There would totally be improvement, like obvious and quick improvement, but those first few times were pretty rough.

2. Shino

Baby boy. Sweet boy. Ugh. I love. I wanted him as number one, so I'm not even defending this. Take it up with my lawyer.

1. Naruto

He's not the main character for nothing. Naruto lays pipe, but he can get a bit selfish at times. Never fear though, the second he catches himself, lost in the sauce, another round gets added to his itinerary. He'll be making it up to you tenfold, even if it was just for a minute.

Tier 1 - Fantastic🔮

5. Sakura

With her level of anatomical knowledge, she barely even needs to break a sweat to give you a release. However, she will break a sweat, because she wants to. Just amazing, idk what to tell you.

4. Temari

Got me kickin my feet and twirlin my hair rn - she would be so GODLY in the sack. She's always very present, very attentive, but is so openly expressive in the moment. Temari would have you screaming syllables and seeing colours behind your eyelids.

🥉 Neji

The game my man's got is INSANE. I just know for a goddamn fact that no one dances the horizontal mambo as gracefully as Neji. You're pleased, he's pleased, no one's ever terribly tired or bruised, the limits are clear lines but are never even toed. That's just the reg, too! Special nights would be fucking wild, dude would have wine, and flowers, and candles - he would go the whole nine yards every time.

🥈 Ino

Be still, my beating heart. Christ. Yeah, Ino's got this shit on lock. She's a vers switch, need I say more? (I do, someone request a fic)

🥇 SHIKAMARU

Y'all seen my preferance yet, or nah?

Oh Em Gee - Shikamaru could have you, heels to Jesus, all night longgggg. The stamina, the will, the knowledge, the capability; it's all there, and no one is as apt to put it all together except for Shikamaru. He would go for hours at a time, until he physically couldn't anymore. He would know exactly what makes your timebomb tick, and he would push every button so deliciously. Fuck, he's a tease too. If you two aren't actively in the bedroom, he's trying to get you there.

[socra-time]

Naruto Episode Comments, Ep. 1-20

(Context: I know a lot of the character’s names and some of the big plot points, but I’m going in blind otherwise)

Ep 1:

-Naruto is kinda annoying but also he’s just a lil gremlin and I can respect that

-I kinda love Iruka. Also he’s hot.

-”Clone jutsu? That’s my worst jutsu!” says Naruto, known for his Shadow Clone jutsu

-there’s just something so charming about the old anime style (but also some of the expressions are so goofy)

-HOLY SHIT IRUKA IS A REAL ONE

-I don’t trust the Hokage. I don’t really have a concrete reason for this yet, but his vibes are off

-oooh Irukaaaaa you’re so sexy for not being an asshole to the traumatized child

-oh I guess Shadow Clone jutsu is different from regular clones so disregard my earlier comment

-honestly this was a better first episode than I was expecting. I’m sold!

Ep 2:

-Naruto continues to be a lil gremlin

-Naruto pls for the love of god stop using your stupid ass “sexy jutsu”

-the Hokage really has had enough of these little kids and honestly I can’t even blame him

-I love the voice of Konohamaru’s trainer (I’m watching dub btw), it’s so pompous

-I love the ninja sandals. I want a pair.

-I like that Naruto’s voice actually sounds childish. It’s a tad bit grating sometimes but I think I’ll get used to it quickly

-STOP IT WITH THE SEXY JUTSU

-STOPPPPPP

-anyways #KonohamaruForHokage

Ep 3:

-again, the ninja sandals are so fucking drippy

-Ino wtf is up with your outfit. Why is half of it bandages

-the amount of sheer passive-aggressiveness in these 12 year old girls-

-Naruto has a crush on Sakura at first???? I didn’t know that lol

-Sasuke does not give a singular shit about anything other than his brooding and tbh I didn’t expect anything less

-Sakura’s little inner monologue is so feral lmao

-I don’t like Sasuke’s voice so far. It’s monotone, but not in an edgy way, just in a kinda dull way? Also he doesn’t really sound like a kid

-no hate to Shikamaru but his ponytail looks painful. My scalp hurts just looking at it

-oh my god not Sakura ragging on Naruto for being an orphan-

-lmao the amount of fucking drama with this team of kids is crazy

-why are the Hokage and Kakashi just casually breaking into Naruto’s home to look around

-rip Naruto’s bowels

Ep 4:

-I was not expecting Kakashi to sound like that but I’m kinda here for it actually

-oh I can already tell I’m gonna hate how the female characters are written in this show. Sakura honey I’m so sorry

-I know Sasuke’s got trauma or whatever but god he’s so fucking edgy. “I hate most things and I don’t like anything” bitch just say your favorite food or something

-oh my god Naruto is so tiny compared to Kakashi

-ok I already see why people love Kakashi so much

Ep 5:

-Kakashi is raining hell down on these children and I’m so here for it

-Kakashi is so COOL

-fucking “HEADHUNTER JUTSU” is the most metal name for a jutsu

-“you think like little kids” says Kakashi to the 12 year olds

-Kakashi really didn’t need to give his “you failed” monologue while pinning Sasuke to the ground. Bro was just doing it to assert dominance lmao

-I know that Sasuke’s reasoning for sharing is logical and not because he cares about Naruto, but I like that he offers his food to Naruto first

-aw the squad is starting to squad just a teeny tiny bit

Ep 6:

-booooo Naruto is a cat hater :(

-I love that Naruto is shorter than Sakura

-I like that we get some worldbuilding early on (also I’m a sucker for a good map so the scene explaining the different regions was cool)

-okay Sasuke is a badass

-Kakashi is also a badass but I already knew that

-I love how chill Kakashi is about literally everything

Ep 7:

-Kakashi is so over the bridge builder guy’s bullshit

-I do wish there was more of a sense of scale regarding how far apart the different locations are, since I have no idea how far away from Konoha the Land of Waves actually is

-okay I was NOT expecting Zabuza to fucking THROW HIS GIANT CLOUD STRIFE SWORD LIKE A BOOMERANG???

-Zabuza 🤝 Kakashi

not wearing their headbands correctly

-I like Zabuza’s voice

-the sharingan doesn’t make that much sense to me in terms of how it works but I’ll just chalk it up to anime logic

EP 8:

-oh the Water Prison jutsu is kinda terrifying to think about

-I can’t get over Zabuza’s fuckin armwarmer thingies

-ah yes gotta love the choppy old anime fight animation

-between Kakashi and Zabuza, Sasuke really cannot get a break from being pinned to the ground

-the demon wind shuriken is so sick-looking

-okay good on Naruto and Sasuke for working together but couldn’t they have given Sakura something to do

Ep 9:

-binging this makes the flashbacks at the beginning of episodes very annoying

-oh Kakashi is fucking PISSED

-shoutout to whoever animated all the hand signs for the jutsus holy shit

-yeah Kakashi would be so annoying to fight ngl

-Sakura is constantly calling Naruto out on his bullshit and that’s the kind of hater behavior I’m here for

-the soundtrack is hitting different this episode

-wow Naruto really saw another kid kill a man and got immediate imposter syndrome lmao

Ep 10:

-I like Haku’s painted nails

-aw Kakashi is actually a really encouraging teacher

-how is Naruto so bad with chakra control and yet was able to master Shadow Clone jutsu????

-Kakashi casually defying gravity to walk up a tree with his crutches was actually kinda hilarious to me for some reason

-I’m still not sold on Sasuke’s voice. There are moments when it’s fine but otherwise it’s just so stiff

-YAY FOR SAKURA GETTING A WIN OVER THE BOYS

-aw Naruto encouraging Sakura was cute (even though he was salty about her beating him)

-I like the difference that’s set up between having a lot of chakra (like Naruto) versus good chakra control (like Sakura)- hopefully this means people are going to go about how they train and fight differently

-Naruto asking Sakura for advice and asking her not to tell Sasuke anything was actually kinda endearing lol

Ep 11:

-dumb question maybe but if Gato is so against the bridge being built and he has the resources to hire a bunch of goons, why doesn’t he just bomb the bridge or something

-ah yes Sakura discovers poverty

-Sasuke is slowly growing on me. He’s very awkward

-Sakura I’m so sorry you have to deal with those two idiots as teammates

-holy fuck Inari’s backstory with Kaiza was darker than I thought it would be

-also rip Kaiza you were a real one

Ep 12:

-lmao not Naruto thinking Haku is prettier than Sakura fjfhshhajasisa-

-aw Sasuke helping Naruto walk home after training was nice, there’s definitely very slight development happening in their relationship as rivals

-Kakashi’s talk with Inari was a really nice moment

Ep 13:

-I like the way Haku talks. It’s very impassive and mysterious

-I’m always a fan of when the MC inspires literally everyone around them and Naruto is no exception

-Haku’s painted nails continue to slay (also I realized his toenails are painted too)

-the needles Haku fights with are really cool-looking but also seem really impractical

-YEAHHHHH NARUTO TIME

-aw Kakashi is proud of his kids

-goddamn Haku is so cool

Ep 14:

-I’m only thinking about this now but did Naruto never wonder why he had a big seal on his stomach

-literally half this episode was recap which was kinda annoying

-Naruto I love you but you’re so stupid

Ep 15:

-I really wish they gave Sakura more to do in this fight. I get that Kakashi’s the only one who can take Zabuza and that we need to see Naruto and Sasuke fighting together, but Sakura is kinda just standing there the whole time

-Haku needs to go to therapy ASAP

-I’m still confused about how Kakashi’s sharingan works tbh

Ep 16:

-aw yeah baby Sasuke sharingan time

-aw yeahhhh Sasuke saving Naruto

-god fucking dammit I think Sasuke is my favorite Team 7 member and I hate that for me

-oh boy Naruto is about to go apeshit

-also there is no way in hell anyone watching this actually believed Sasuke died

Ep 17:

-geez the animation quality really went up this episode

-yeah Haku’s backstory is just as tragic as I thought it would be but also Jesus Christ his relationship with Zabuza is so fucked up

-I’m very curious as to why Kakashi has the sharingan if it’s a bloodline trait of the Uchiha clan (and also why he only has it in one eye)

-Kakashi summoning fucking dogs was so random but also hell yeah doggies

-andddd Kakashi’s a lightningbender? I thought the sharingan was his main thing but apparently not

-Haku PLEASE go to therapy

Ep 18:

-this show’s soundtrack has actually been so good so far

-so like was Naruto actually gonna kill Haku before Haku stopped him

-oh FUCK rip Haku (also first real-time death of the series!)

-Kakashi closing Haku’s eyes and saving his body was nice, you can tell that he feels bad about him dying even though he was on Zabuza’s side

-also they didn’t hold back on the blood, goddamn

-I like that the bridge builder seems to have a bit of a soft spot for Sakura since she’s been with him the most

Ep 19:

-Gato is literally so fucking disgusting I need him dead ASAP

-Kakashi wrangling Naruto back from attacking Gato was kinda funny

-ah yes the big Shonen Protagonist Speech™ from Naruto

-Zabuza’s last hurrah was fucking epic, I really like how his and Haku’s story ended (also the line “where he’s going, I cannot follow” about Zabuza joining Haku in the afterlife was metal). I like that Zabuza got a last moment of humanization

-aw Naruto is such a wholesome, determined lil guy

-oh Naruto is gonna be so insufferable when he finds out the bridge is named after him

Ep 20:

-HELL YEAH CHUNIN EXAM TIMEEEE IM SO EXCITED

-wow Naruto is really out here fantasizing about being Sasuke’s knight in shining armor

-Sasuke is a cocky little shit but also he’s technically right about Naruto and Sakura being “worse” than him

-so far Sakura’s biggest fight has been her beating up fuckin Konohamaru

-SAND SIBLINGS SPOTTED!!!

-I don’t like Temari’s voice

[gaydinosaurbananamilkcarton]

I still love sakura. Even if she's a dumbass. No way am I sticking around for somebody that not only treated me like shit, he left me to take care of my daughter by myself for 9 years and then tried to kill her when he met her. The main reason I like sakura is because of her character development. Instead of being a weak sasuke obsessed character, she actually became a strong sasuke obsessed character! Yay!

Most people won't admit it, but they hate sakura because of some shit she said to naruto when they were KIDS(12), not to mention, she wasn't lying. He was an orphan 💀 but they go and say that she's weak, even after she gets stronger, and like rock lee for doing exactly what she did. (Training to become better) sakura never HAD the same powers that naruto and sasuke did. Yet she still MANAGED on her own. That's why I like her.

I like naruto, just not his mindset. Of course I want to become hokage and protect people that treated me like shit for my entire life! Then he became hokage, and made NO changes for the better. He didn't want to be hokage to help, he wanted to be hokage just because he craved attention and validation. He always wants to save people, and doesn't understand that he's making it worse. Sasuke IS more realistic as a character, and sasuke has had it worse than naruto has. Hate me all you want, but it's true. His entire clan was murdered by his brother, including his parents. And then he was obsessed with revenge, only to kill his brother and then find out WHY itachi did what he did and he had to regret it. All he ever KNEW was loneliness and anger, so he had no idea how to live without it. Naruto never had his parents or siblings, meaning he didn't have to LOSE anything. And that's why sasuke was angry with him.

I also think it's important to include Kakashi though. Not only was he practically USELESS for team 7 as a whole (naruto went to be trained by jiraiya, sasuke by orochimaru/? And then sakura by tsunade. It would've been cold if she trained under guy too but the author HATES a strong female character that isn't evil) kakashi needs to be analysed as a whole, especially with his treatment of sasuke. He claims to have gone through what sasuke did, and then tells him that revenge is pointless and leaves you hollow, and then he helps shikamaru get revenge for asuma. He's a hypocrite. He wins the award for the world's WORST sensei.

I won't even make a separate post for boruto, because there's no reason. The show is confusing as hell, and equally as pointless. Boruto hates his dad for no reason, all the important fights are for sasuke and naruto, naruto adopts kawaki and let's him beat up his son, kawaki seals them away and then flips it to make boruto look like he's in the wrong, there are no more shinobi, Boruto trained under sasuke, and then sasuke was sealed in a tree so now he cosplays as him. Sakura is NOWHERE to be seen💀 (good for her) himawari has kurama (how will she not be stronger than boruto?💀) and boruto has Naruto's abilities (rasengan, flying Raijin- minato, and shadow clones) with purple lighting and all of a sudden he's a god. I'm confused about what the jougan does. He also has his fathers weak mindset about not wanting to kill kawaki, but just wanting to punch him. Sarada has insane potential but of course the author won't let her be great because she's a woman! I hate the idea of borusara because I see them as nothing but teammates. It's like the dynamic between naruto and sakura. She treats him like a brother. She hugs her friend that she hasn't seen in 2 years that's also been framed and ostracised by the entire village and suddenly they're the best ship in the world 💀 Delusion at its finest. None of those kids need to be with ANYONE. Just focus on the goddamn anime and stop ruining shit. Because NO ONE is watching it

[badgalsasuke]

Honestly when you read the current plotline in boruto it became so annoying how they steal sns plots for their lil ships while not giving those two some more room independent of the kids' story. Especially when something major happened to them a few chapters ago like naruto losing kurama and sasuke losing his rinnegan. What's going on rn in their arc is that boruto and kawaki's like, switched places where everyone in the village now has an altered memory of the two where boruto is seen as some kind of enemy of the state and is a suspect for naruto's "murder" which leads him to become a rogue missing nin (hence all the sasuke wardrobe lol). While Kawaki is the one who is the hokage's son and loved and protected by everyone. This is done because kawaki believes boruto needs to be killed to ensure naruto's safety (something about some alien powers possessing boruto and how it's a threat to naruto) so he put naruhina in a coma so that naruto can't stop him and made a deal with ada to make everyone in the village believe that boruto killed naruto so that its easier to kill him when he's hated by everyone (stupid plot i tell you). So now everyone in the village believe in this spell and loathes boruto except sarada, who is immune to the spell and believes in his innocence. They even have a scene where sarada pleads to shikamaru as the acting hokage to spare boruto or something. Literally stealing from five kage arc where naruto pleads to the raikage. There's also the whole sun and moon monologue about mitsuki and boruto, once again paralleling sns. Sns itself in this arc is mildly touched upon, more than the other ships for sure but they're also there to amplify borusara more I think. There is a focus on sasuke's headband but it's mainly used to prop boruto's character development in fighting kawaki. Also, when the spell first broke out, Sasuke also believes in them and loathes boruto for a while because he believes he killed naruto before it was Sarada who convinced him that everyone's memory has been altered. Sarada awakens her Mangekyou while pleading with Sasuke so that's also what convinced him to help Boruto and went rogue with him (again lol, and there is also absolutely no mention of sakura at all throughout all of this, which pleases me deeply). When Sasuke sees boruto again he sees the headband he gave and that's also another thing that convince him that his memory's altered. Somewhere during their rogue time Sasuke was defeated by a tree god which made him stuck there, just a mere plot to make boruto be "alone" without his parental figures and mentor I think. We're gonna have to wait for the plot point where sasuke and naruto are back from the coma to see if the writer might actually develop more to these two but i doubt it tbh. Ikemoto might grasp the significance of their bond but nothing will ever hit like the stuff Kishimoto where writing about them. The best we can get is probably some more acknowledgement of their bond while borusara will be endgame.

Hi anon!

The whole thing sound very dumb and stupid ngl LMAOO

Idk but I never liked the inclusion of alien shit in the Naruto universe, to me is one of the worst things Kishimoto ever did.

Anyway, it's not a Sasuke clone but the actual Sasuke that did the whole thing w/ the headband and that weird comment of "I'm gonna gave to show my resolve too" or something like that? lol and the whole thing about the tree happened after that conversation with Boruto... hmmmm.

Isn't Kishimoto now writing the story? he's given interviews that it was Ikemoto writing it based on the outline he wrote before the series started but he has to approve everything Ikemoto writes. The cover of the manga doesn't really specify who is writing the story. Usually you have "written by" and "art by", but here they dropped that. Ikemoto does the art but the creator (of what? the franchise or the story?) is Kishimoto and he supervises Ikemoto but to what extent?

Boruto is too confusing to me, idk what is going on, I just wait for other blogs to point out whatever is happening between Naruto and Sasuke.

[dragynkeep]

If you insist…

Why is nart so shitty with it's female characters?

Because 9/10 they don't do anything.

Not only do we have such a weird gap between the female characters and the male ones, were even the teams have two - three and the girls are nearly always stuck at one, to the point that the senseis have literally one woman who got benched before actually doing anything, but those female characters don't get nearly the amount of time or energy to their stories.

Sakura has the best given that she's on the main team, but compared to Naruto, Sasuke and Kakashi? Even Yamato? She is given the brunt end of the stick constantly, with her achievements either ignored overshadowed, her story so often revolving around loving Sasuke or pushing up Naruto, and the ending completely omitting her from recieving any reincanation powerup or even the final fucking fight.

Hinata is the same as Sakura, where most of her character and her story is revolving around how much she loves Naruto, whereas the more interesting parts like her inheritence being passed over to Hinabi, or her being the target of Neji's trauma and anger towards how their clan runs and what her father did. All of that is barely given anything in Part 1, and practically nothing in Shippuden.

Ino and Tenten are the worst in the Konoha 11, but poor Tenten doesn't even have a last name. She had a chance to actually get something during the War arc with the powerful weapons being something she is literally a master in, but then nothing happens of it.

Outside of that, we had Temari, who at least got the screentime and one of the better written romances with Shikamaru, but again it's devolving another female character's whole thing to romance. We don't even get her and Kankuro dealing with their abusive dad in the War arc.

She had some good moments, don't get me wrong, but that's not enough to what others get.

And Ino's just there. Really the Hidan and Kakuzu arc was mainly centred around Shikamaru, as both Choji and Ino got pushed into the background for it, but Ino didn't even do anything in the final fight. At least Choji and Kakashi got more, she just fucking stood around.

There's others but I also wanna mention that the only female Hokage we got was Tsunade, who's main jokes are how big her boobs are, her skill as a medic, and that she makes herself younger when most of the women in Naruto aren't allowed to actually look their age or even have less "pretty" features like the guys do.

TLDR: The girls are reduced down to love interests, mothers, who just are in the background with very little to do compared to their male counterparts.

[chrimsonfoxdon]

Would you be willing to rank the konoha 12 from worst to best?

Actually yes I would LMAO!! I assume you mean like… my own personal favorites between the konoha 12, rather than something like which I think are the strongest.

I do wanna also state that I don’t hate or dislike any of the konoha 12, in fact I kinda like them all?? So please don’t think that I don’t like the lower rated characters. But if I have to rank them, from least favorite to most favorite… (list under the cut!)

12. Shino Aburame

(Sorry tumblr limits me to only 10 images so the lower ranked ones aren’t getting pics I’m sorry)

I… I just don’t really feel that attached to him?? I’m sorry 🫠 his insect and bug abilities can be pretty neat tho.

11. Kiba Inuzuka

It’s kinda a similar thing as Shino. Just not that attached to him as I am to other characters. He does have a dog though, which is almost always a positive point for me not gonna lie.

10. Ino Yamanaka

She also just doesn’t leave much of an impression on me in general. I’m kinda sad that her jutsu is just… kinda lacking?? BUT she seems like she’d be a good friend and fun to hang out with. Also she’s pretty.

9. Sasuke Uchiha

Fun fact when I first started watching Naruto he was my favorite during the land of waves arc! But then we saw Team Gai and the way I threw him to the side SO FAST 😭😂 I do still kinda think he’s a jerk for abandoning all the people who care about him for power. Is it because I take the Sasuke retrieval arc personally?? Maybe. BUT he was right about the konoha elders. In general I just find him very fun to bully. But I GUESS he’s strong and such…

8. Naruto Uzumaki

He’s the main character so I feel like he just gets points with us just being exposed to him the most in the series. I do find it kinda harder to like… I don’t know, be attached to him the farther in Shippuden we get. I guess it’s cuz of the constant power creep, but that’s more of a shonen issue than anything to me. Rewatching the series as an adult, his backstory definitely breaks my heart 🥺 poor kid just wants to be loved and doesn’t understand why the village hates him. It’s hard not to root for him honestly. I cried when he became hokage even though I wasn’t watching the series at the time I can’t lie.

7. Sakura Haruno

I used to not like her much, but that’s cuz Kishi can’t write women let’s be honest. I’ll always be super impressed with her growth as a ninja herself, particularly as a medical ninja. The Kazekage Rescue Arc really shows how amazing she can be and what she’s capable of. I loved her fight with Sasori. I also relate to her constantly wanting to catch up to her teammates and just feeling like dead weight. Girlie I love you and you deserve happiness 💖

6. Hinata Hyuga

SHE’S A SWEET GIRL SHE’S DOING HER BEST SHE’S TRYING TO FIND HER PLACE IN THE WORLD AND I!!! SUPPORT THIS GIRL!!! She’s also super cute with one of the best designs in the series. Her fighting Pain is so emotional like. She’s risking her life for the guy she loves and admires most in the world. I gotta give her props for that. She’s not the strongest obviously, but I do enjoy her character a lot.

5. Shikamaru Nara

My brother’s favorite, so I feel a lot of secondhand happiness about Shikamaru!! His shadow jutsu is… well, basic, but very versatile (I kinda wish ino’s jutsu got a similar treatment). His strategies make him a really fun character to watch from start to finish. His arc with Hidan was so cool. Very good character in my opinion.

4. Choji Akamichi

Ok so not gonna lie he’d probably rank lower on my list when I was younger, but again, rewatching as an adult I just love the guy!! He’s such a kind soul and works to protect his friends. His backstory also just kinda speaks to me as a kid who was often excluded from activities with my peers (sometimes also cuz of my size). I’m so glad he found shikamaru and is best friends with him. He deserves so much love. He’s a good lad!

3. Rock Lee

GODDDDDDD HIS CHARACTER IS SO GOOOOOOOOOODDDDD!!! I remember liking him even as a kid, but now that I’m older, it’s just amplified. To see someone with uh… no natural talent whatsoever get so far as a shinobi is just so satisfying to see, especially since I can relate nowadays. If anything, seeing him struggle and still fight for what he believes in has made a bigger impact on me now than when I was younger. I REALLY wish he had more fights though. Fights where he won mainly on his own. Also his fight with Gaara in the chunin exams is ICONIC YOU CANNOT CHANGE MY MIND THE WEIGHT SCENE CHANGED MY 9-YEAR-OLD BRAIN CHEMISTRY!!!

2. Tenten

I!!! LOVE!!! THIS!!!! GIRL!!!! AAAAAAAAA!!!!! There’s just something about how her strategy is to overwhelm her opponents with so many powerful ninja weapons that just… speaks to me. Her design is cute, I find her personality fun, and she’s my favorite female Naruto character. I wanna be her friend so bad. Also her journey in letting go of a childhood dream just… HMMMMM SPEAKS TO MEEEEEE as a very depressed adult. She makes me smile and laugh and cry and I just want her to know how amazing and special she is. She’s… a 10/10 😎

1. Neji Hyuga

WOOOW OMG WHAT A SHOCK RIGHT??? Man what can I say about Neji that I haven’t already. He just really awakened something in me way back in the day, and he still occupies my mind to this day. I think there’s just something about seeing a character suffering quietly for so long and taking it out on others (and himself) grow into a person who tries to better himself and look more so on the bright side of life, despite what life has thrown at him. (Again that’s kinda something that means more to me as an adult than when I was a kid) he deserves so much love and happiness and I am so proud of him Neji Hyuga I love you so much

[notquitejiraiya]

I want to ask! 3 - 14

Absolutely absolutely! I answered number 8 and 14 in my precious post (replying to the lovely @clumsydragon28) but I’ll answer the rest under here:

3) screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

Oh god, many many many. The first that comes to mind (if I try and keep this Naruto related) was something about Temari being forced to birth Shikamaru’s misogynistic son?? like mate, please calm yourself.

4) what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

I don’t often block, but the straw that broke the camel’s back with the most recent block was just someone’s persistence ignorance and lack of interest in learning and improving, despite pretending to. Not even just of a craft, just of being a better, more personal and understanding human

5) worst discord server and why

A server entirely made up of Paul McCartney stans I was invited to and quietly observed for like 6 months before being chucked out for being inactive. I sent like one message — I was too scared to speak — and I don’t even like Paul McCartney past a general appreciation of his music. Not the worst as in a bad place, but worst as in I didn’t belong lmao.

6) which ship fans are the most annoying?

I personally don’t think any fans are THAT bad anymore. Not bad enough to be mean about. Back in the day found a fair few shippers whose main ship has Naruto as one of the characters to be a right pain in the arse. But that’s only my memory of the old, bad shipping war days (from the sidelines) and honestly, it’s not that bad. Not bad enough to broadly label as annoying.

7) what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Not necessarily hate, but Sakura. I always found her just fine in canon but all of the pointless discourse around her absolutely drives me up the wall to the to the point where I see her name (outside a fic as a non-main character, which is rare for me, too) and I just groan.

9) worst part of canon

Do I even need to say it? It’s the fucking aliens.

10) worst part of fanon

Maybe it sounds dumb, but for me it’s just when people write Naruto himself. I can’t think of a single fic I’ve read where Naruto hasn’t annoyed me. He was already so precariously on the edge of bearable for me in canon that seeing interpretations of him is always bound to drive me nuts.

Alternatively, across various fandoms, bragging about how niche things are as if that makes them better. This always gripes me in fandoms: spaces that are supposed to bring people who enjoy the same things together. Of course please do like what you like and be proud; I’m happy for you that you like that thing, but the popularity or lack of popularity of something is no bearing on how much more nuanced, clever or deep your level of thought is.

11) number of fandom-related words you've filtered

Grand total of 6 muted words on twt if that’s what this means. 0 on tumblr because I can control what I see better :)

12) the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

I mean, I don’t think anyone in my fandoms is that unpopular. Maybe I just got good at not seeing bullshit, but nobody. My violence for this one is that there’s content for most things in this fandom to a level that reflects canon and that doesn’t make things “unpopular”. Less popular, maybe. But obviously your fave with 1 minute screen time or 3 lines in a novel isn’t gonna have an insane fandom following probably. Doesn’t make them unpopular, they’re just a nobody.

If I have to give a “proper” answer though, I say Rasa. Just cause I find him interesting and he’s perhaps not widely enjoyed.

13) worst blorboficiation

Think as of late it’s got to be Kankuro. But specifically the cat-boy stuff I see. I just don’t get it. The man might have a good and the capacity to be silly and soft and dorky, but the cat-boy stuff just doesn’t align with him at all for me. Not a fan.

[momochizoey]

Ahh thank you so much!! Not weird at all, I love getting comments on older works! (Plus there's Tumblr posts that still circulate that are over a decade old, so no problem at all!)

Looks wise I think she stays pretty true to the actual Azula look, the two hair strands are pretty similar to hear previous hairstyle, and she's pragmatic enough to accept the expectations of the top knot and long hair as a royal in a new culture (if there's one thing Ursa is good at it's drilling the Fire Nation cultural expectations for noble girls into her daughter). She might be a little more buff than canon Azula because she takes her non-bending physical training more seriously (working to achieve the level of her ninja training), though really canon Azula is already quite strong. As she gets older though she might become a little more butch, perhaps during her mission outside the Fire Nation she cuts her hair short for practical reasons and discovers how much she's missed it, though she'll keep the top knot for her crown.

I'd say blue fire is still her main fighting fire, given that it's more a property of her perfect control, but her healing fire will be green like her healing chakra was. She might have even taught her healing to a select few during Zuko's banishment, to aid the war effort.

She's also more socially competent in some ways given her experience in her previous life, so her bond with Mai and Ty Lee is actually closer and maybe even more genuine than canon, though she's also lacking in some other areas like understanding what is and is not normal to expect children their age to be able to do and deal with in this world (cough Konoha child soldier cough).

I'm not sure if there's anyone that'd really remind her of Tsunade. Ozai might be closest because he's also a harsh taskmaster who doesn't tolerate failure and demands she train to perfection, but he just doesn't have the kindness that Tsunade has. Maybe she'd recognise her gruffness in Mai a tiny bit, but no she'd probably not think of anyone as being like Tsunade. Iroh might remind her of Jiraiya, but like, his worst qualities: misogynist lecher that doesn't respect women, idealist without the backbone to stand up for it, dodging responsibility and too stuck on his past failures, incapable of taking things seriously.

Ino she'd see a little bit in Ty Lee, peppy, gossipy, girly, sometimes boycrazy, with a surprising mean streak (and also a hint of Hinata in her fighting style, which she actually gives tips for). With Mai she would recognise Tenten's fighting style, obviously giving some tips there (and encouraging her to learn to use more varied weapons than just throwing blades), though personality I'd say she sees some of Shikamaru, without the misogyny that is (yes she takes Mai cloud watching and playing Pai Sho, yes it becomes a regular thing). And of course she teaches them both some basic healing, which Ty Lee takes to better than Mai.

As for her Seal, oooh that's a good question! Tbh I hadn't really considered it, I might try to see if I can fit something similar in there at some point! Maybe it's something she's still experimenting with because her control still isn't as perfect as she wants it to be by the start of canon ("just one hair out of place") and it's dangerous to start without perfect control.

PS: Funnily enough I was actually working on some continuation scenes for this AU the past month in-between working on an original novel I'm slowly writing for, I might end up posting them here and on AO3 at some point. Also fun fact: this Sakura had a fling with Temari in her past life (enemy turned commiserating colleague during diplomatic meetings which she's part of as Tsunade's apprentice, they get drinks after to unwind and complain about their Kages, things happen and poof, they start secretly flirting during meetings and competing to see who can be the most blatant without being discovered by the other participants), and during her mission through the Earth Kingdom, guess who she meets that brings those memories to the forefront?👀🪭 Surely that won't cause any major divergence in the timeline? (Sorry Sokka, you're not having much luck with the ladies this time around)

A scene from my Burning Cherry Blossom fic idea

My interest in Naruto fanfics has recently been rekindled (specifically ones focusing on Sakura because those at least generally write women better than the actual anime or manga ever did), and it gave me the vague idea for this Naruto/ATLA crossover, where Sakura is reborn as Azula. I don't know if I'll ever turn this into an actual fic, or if I'll just occasionally post a scene here that came to me, but I wanted to get this out there at least, so I hope you enjoy (or not, I can't tell you what to do).

The first step to learning basic medical ninjutsu is practicing on an animal. In Konoha, the Mystical Palm technique was trained on fish, keeping it alive out of water before ever getting to try it on another person. After all, the technique required very precise chakra control: too much or too little and you risk unbalancing a patient’s chakra system and sending them into a coma.

Sakura’s greatest strength had always been her chakra control though. As Tsunade’s apprentice she further honed that to an art, until not a drop of chakra was wasted or used without her say-so. She could direct it to fix damaged organ tissue, or to crumble a boulder with a flick of her finger.

Chi was… not quite the same as chakra, but there were similarities, in her experience. Her control was not quite what it was Before, but it was still more than advanced for a prodigious 8 year old, close to her level when she started training under Tsunade.

At first she worried that chi was too different, that it couldn’t be used to heal like chakra could. But last week her new- her dad (she had to stop thinking of her parents as ‘new’, she didn’t want to slip up and give them questions she didn’t want to answer) told her about the waterbending healers of the Northern Water Tribe, who healed their warriors from wounds that would have been lethal during the First Siege of Agna Qel’A. This healing ability is what ultimately forced the uneasy stalemate between the Fire Nation and the Northern Water Tribe for the past 80 years, Ozai said, because losing men where the enemy did not was never a winning tactic.

Which was fascinating, and her inner medic felt vague vindication at the acknowledgment of her profession’s importance after so many people had looked down on it Before, but what interested her more was the proof that chi could be used to heal. She could be a medic again! She could be an invaluable aid to the war effort that way! She just had to figure out how…

Which led her to her current situation. She was sitting next to the pond in the Palace Gardens, stroking the shell of the turtleduck in her lap while examining its left leg. She’d noticed it had been injured when she walked behind Zuzu and her mom through the garden earlier that morning, and she wanted to try to heal it with chi.

Slowly, holding her hand behind the animal so it wouldn’t be spooked by the flames, she closed her eyes and focused on her chi, sending it down her arm and to the palm of her hand. Before releasing it, she cooled it down from the blazing inferno it was normally to a soothing warmth.

She opened her eyes as she let the first flames appear over her palm and felt that same warmth radiate from her hand, flickers of green colouring the flames. Moving her hand to the turtleduck’s injured leg, she watched with bated breath as it slowly started healing. It wasn’t burning, it wasn’t trying to get away, she was actually doing this-

“AZULA! What on Earth do you think you’re doing!?”

She yelped, shocked by the sudden yell of her mom, and felt her control slip and then the turtleduck was screeching and flailing and the smell of burnt flesh and feathers filled her nose and-

A hand forcefully pulled her up, painfully digging into her arm. She looked up to see Ursa, her mom, looking at her with disgust so strong it knocked the breath from her lungs, a hollow feeling burying itself in her chest.

‘Mom! I was just trying to-”

“I don’t want to hear it!” Ursa interrupted, “What kind of monster burns defenseless animals like that?”

Azula recoiled. That actually hurt. She knew she wasn’t the easiest kid, considering the whole reincarnation business, and it probably looked worse than it was, but for her mother to call her a monster? For this?

“I didn’t mean to burn it, it was an accident-”

Slap. “Don’t. Lie to me,” Ursa hissed. “Now go to your room and think about what you’ve done. I will be discussing this with your father.”

—-

Sullenly, Azula walked through the hallways to her room, nursing her cheek. The analytical medic part of her brain took note: ‘civilian, untrained, stronger than expected but not aimed to do permanent harm. Expected swelling, limited bruising, one day recovery max.’ The part of her brain that was truly the 8 years old she was in this body was still trying to grasp that her mother had hit her. The only time her parents Before hit her were during training, and that was just to help her get better, to make her stronger, not... this.

As she sat on her bed, hugging her knees to her chest, she clenched her hands, brow furrowed. She’d grown lax in her time here. She’d taken her control for granted, and forgot that it required work to get there. She’d almost had it, but the technique working made her overconfident and lose track of her surroundings. Clearly, almost wasn’t good enough. Today had shown her she couldn’t afford to lose control like that. So she would practice, and make sure nothing could disturb her, no shock could make her control slip like today.

From today on, Azula vowed to herself, her control would be perfect. She would have to be perfect. Anything less was unacceptable.

[sunstaar]

Hi, I would like a headcanon of how the guys (Naruto, Kakashi, Shikamaru and Sasuke) would react to finding out that their partner is a demon hunter. if it can only be one character i choose Shikamaru Nara

hc: Naruto, Kakashi, Shikamaru & Sasuke with a demon hunter s/o

Word Count: 0,8k

Naruto

to be honest, Naruto wouldn’t have a clue until you told him

like, not even one

and even afterwards, he actually did not know what exactly that meant for you

but, at the same time that also meant that Naruto was really eager to get to know that part of you and how it defined you

so you better expect him to ask you a thousand questions and more all about what it is like being a demon hunter and how he can support you

(Name), he loves you unconditionally, nothing in your relationship would change

except for the fact that Naruto would now support that part of you unconditionally

he really does put in an effort and wants to know as much as he can

he even asks Sakura for help and advice, who promptly sends him to the next library

admittedly, it took him a few moments to enter, but for you, he was willing to do it

and so he even researched on his own, all to make you feel comfortable

overall, Naruto would react very positively and support you and who you are

Kakashi

first of all, he would curse himself for not seeing the obvious sooner

how did he not know this about you?

usually, Kakashi is a very perceptive man who notices things about you, that you haven’t even noticed yourself

the way you scrunch up your nose when feeling disgusted by something? He saw and knew

the change in your emotions before and after work? Kakashi was well aware

but the fact that you were a demon hunter? nuh uh

somehow, he managed to actually miss this very important fact about you and did not pick up on it, until you were finally ready to tell him

Kakashi realized the reason he didn’t know was that you really didn’t want him to know at first, which he understood

he was just glad that you eventually decided to tell him about you being a demon hunter

however, when you started with the words “We need to talk”, he could hear his heart just drop

did he do something wrong? did you feel like your relationship didn’t work out as expected?

he braced for the worst (even though he totally was not ready) and then you told him about you being a demon hunter

how dramatic of you, really, (Name)

after you told him, Kakashi was curious about it and made sure to inform himself about your profession

but next time you have something to tell him, don’t give him a heart attack in the process

Sasuke

honestly, you should have told him sooner than when you did

trust, (Name), trust. the two of you need to be able to trust each other in your relationship and not keep secret from one another

but Sasuke does understand, after some time, how it could have been difficult for you to tell him

he has secrets of his own, after all (most related to his time in Team Taka)

there is a chance that this is the opportunity for the two of you to sit down and to air your dirty laundry and discuss your relationship overall

with Sasuke, it takes time to do it, especially since he can be awkward when it comes to talk about relationship

by the end of the day, the two of you had managed to not only set boundaries, but also gotten closer than you were before

in the end, it was a win-win situation for both of you, I would say

Shikamaru

Shikamaru isn’t stupid, he knows you are hiding something from him

and he does put in some effort to actually figure out what has gotten you so fidgety during some topics of conversations

but his efforts only go so far

that, however, does not mean that he doesn’t figure out the gist of what is going on

from what he gathered before you told him, was that you weren’t exactly a Shinobi like he was

and so he waited until one day you felt like you could tell him

underneath a cloudy sky with quite the humind temperature around the two of you, you ended up telling him about your identity as a demon hunter

again, he knew something was up about your profession, but now it was you who gave him the missing puzzle piece

when he saw your worried expression as you looked at him and shifted your position in the grass, Shikamaru was quite unsure what to do

should he say something comforting? comfort you somehow?

the biggest problem arising from your confession was honestly that he didn’t know what to say afterward

the silence was so loud

so Shikamaru ended up just telling you about all the clues he had noticed over the past weeks

and you staring at him as he talked

in the end, you had nothing to be scared about since Shikamaru just accepted it

no bad blood, no anything

really, you should have known

that does not mean however that Shikamaru doesn’t invest some time to figure out more about demon hunters (not that he would tell you he does, that would be such a drag)

nothing changes about your relationship, really, except that now Shikamaru knows more about you

you couldn’t be luckier, (Name)

Tags: @ur-latibule-blog

[obsidianstrawberrymilk]

Naruto hot takes part 3: can I PLEASE get a waffle?

1) Kushina and Minato’s relationship was so fucked up. Like seriously she was a genocide survivor and he was a literal war criminal who killed thousands of people. 2) Also the fucking power imbalance - Minato was a prodigy, chosen young to be the Third Hokage’s successor, had close ties to the three Sannin aka the most powerful ninja in Konoha, and seemed to have some connection to the Second Hokage. Kushina may have been a Jinjuuriki, but she was also a refugee without a family or connections. 3) Also Minato was probably a psychopath lmao. He literally doesn’t care about anyone’s problems unless they’re shoved in his face, has no reaction to two of his students literally dying, and puts the third one - as a traumatized child - in murder corps. 4) Yk if he was alive he probably would have been a dad in a similar way as Principal Asano from Assassination Classroom. 5) Konoha probably had a part to play in Ushizo’s demise and it’s why no one ever mentions them despite that the literal Hokage was married to an Uzumaki. 6) Sasuke isn’t the amazing radical savior his fandom think he is lol. 7) Yeah, he was the closest to a radical character throughout the series, but the second he found out why Itachi decided killing his whole clan was a good idea he immediately sided with him and never questioned any of his decisions. When he did claim to want a revolution, his ideas were a) becoming a dictator (Kage) or b) killing everyone in Konoha. 8) He has every right to be mad and you could probably make him an actual revolutionary easily, but still lol. 9) Shikaku was a kind of bad dad based on what hints we get of Shikamaru’s home life. 10) Literally everyone’s characterization - Sakura included - was more interesting, well rounded, and had more potential in Part 1 than Part 2. 11) Sakura should have been a ROOT agent. It makes a lot of sense, especially in Part 1. 12) For how interesting Sai’s backstory was there was very little point to his character. The only reason he was there was to be Sasuke’s replacement. 13) The fact that he could have and should have been more is true, but he wasn’t. 14) Tsunade had a shit ton of privilege as both a Senju and the granddaughter of the First Hokage and that really should have been explored. 15) Both Jiraiya and Orochimaru give me pedophile vibes and I do not like it. 16) There was literally no reason why basically all of the Rookie 9 had to be clan heirs. It makes no sense. 17) Sarutobi Hiruzen was probably senile and should probably never be seen ever again. Please someone destroy his face on that stupid Hokage Wall or whatever it’s called. 18) Hashirama wasn’t the happy-go-lucky guy everyone seems to think he is lol. He was manipulative as hell and probably killed a shit ton of people. 19) The Last is a really stupid movie that showcases all of Studio Perriot’s fetishes in like two hours. 20) The one thing that is realistic is Hinata caring more about knitting a scarf for ‘N-naruto kun’ than her sister being kidnapped. 21) Both Sakura and Hinata are shittily written characters who’s entire arcs in-story revolve around guys. The difference is Hinata is a slave owner and Sakura knows jack shit about politics because no one tells her anything. 22) Hey Kishimoto give your main heroine an actual fucking thematic and plot relevant role that makes her equal to her male teammates as she’s literally supposed to be as their deuteragonist challenge. 23) Oh yeah Rin being a ROOT agent also makes a lot of sense. 24) Please sort out Naruto’s backstory. Did he have no friends or were Shikamaru, Kiba, and Chouji his friends? Did he not give a shit about Hinata or did he save her from a copy-pasted version of Sakura’s backstory? Please. 25) Naruto isn’t empathetic at all he just trauma dumps on everyone and expects them to gush over his oh-so-sad backstory because he had it the worst out of everyone, awwww. 26) And the worst part is it works lmaoo. 27) Kakashi has white man energy. 28) The whole reincarnation plotline was stupid and added absolutely nothing other than making Naruto’s whole thing about being an ‘underdog’ even more obsolete as he was literally destined for power. 29) Honestly if the ramen girl (Ayame?) was younger I probably would have shipped her and Naruto. It would’ve been cute. 30) Fugaku wasn’t abusive lol. Yeah, he wasn’t a perfect dad, but he did care about his kids and didn’t purposefully hurt them. The only reason people make him out to be Sasuke’s abuser is so they can make Itachi into this uwu savior instead of a nationalist responsible for a genocide.

[maoam]

WHY HINATA IS NOT A GOOD CHARACTER

INTRODUCTION

I wanted to take a deeper look at Hinata’s character, considering there are a lot of claims about her out there, that she’s strong, that she’s kind, that she’s complex and relatable, that she’s the perfect woman and that she’s at least better than Sakura. I don’t really think so, and I’ll explain why. I’ll be focusing on canon, so no fillers or novels will be included in this post. I’ll say this as a warning, if you’re a fan of her character this probably won’t be something you’ll like. This will be tagged with the anti tags and put under read more so please do not complain if tumblr somehow puts this in the normal tags, it is not intentional. Also Sakura stans please don’t write lengthy comments about Sakura under this, I’m not a fan of her either and I’ll write about her later. Make your own post instead.

”HINATA IS STRONG AND THE BEST KUNOICHI”

Hinata is generally really bad as a shinobi and I’m not sure where the claims that she is strong come from. Hinata's entire character revolves around her being weak. This could have been fine if she actually developed, or if she found some other area for herself, yet she's mediocre at best and a waste of panels at worst, because she never becomes good or strong at anything. She’s not only physically weak from start to finish, but she’s also the equivalent of a damsel in distress. Everytime Hinata attempts to do something, she ends up failing, getting beaten up and having to be saved. She lost to her sister who is five years younger than her, which is what marked her as a failure in her clan. She tried to fight Neji in the chunin exams and ended up coughing up blood and losing her consciousness, and Naruto had to beat Neji for her. After Kabuto heals her fully, she spends the rest of part 1 either sleeping or missing in action. Very underwhelming.

If this had been only the beginning, it would have maybe been fine, but it’s a reoccuring pattern with her character. She throws herself in front of Pain, managing to do nothing but get one-paneled and almost killed. Even at the start of the war she had to be saved by Naruto. She tried to run to Naruto and tripped over a rock. Actually, she’s so weak she got Neji killed, when he had to jump in front of her so she wouldn’t get impaled. Why is she even in the front lines when she can’t fight? Even in Naruto the Last movie she had to be saved multiple times. In Boruto the movie she is still useless and reckless, leaving her daughter’s side to help Naruto, ending up defeated and having to be healed by Sakura once again.

I can’t say she’s mentally strong either. She has the personality of someone who hates conflict and tries to avoid it as best as they can, to the point of agreeing with others on everything, as Neji pointed out. Even without him saying it out loud, most of Hinata’s moments that aren’t her thinking about Naruto are her doing exactly this. This is not the personality of someone who is strong mentally. It’s the personality of someone who is too weak to have their own mind, someone who will go with the flow and is easily led and convinced. It can be dangerous the more you think about it. Hinata is also the bystander who never stands up for Naruto despite liking and admiring him. If she’s a compassionate girl, why isn’t she showing this by reaching out to Naruto and befriending him? Why doesn’t she show he’s not alone? Why is she only drawing inspiration from him? I don’t normally watch fillers, but there was one filler scene unrelated to Hinata where this girl says if you only look at the loser and do nothing, you aren’t much better than the oppressors, which probably wasn’t meant to be a call out for Hinata, but ended up being so anyway. Another thing that’s annoying is how she is berating herself often, yet doing nothing, it comes off as self-pity. Even in the Last movie, she is talking about how she must be a bad sister for knitting a scarf when her sister is in danger. Then why are you doing it and not stopping? Of course everytime this happens Naruto must cheer her up because she just can’t stop moping around and doing something herself.

Aside from all this, from the very beginning Hinata’s honor needed to be defended by Naruto because she couldn’t stand up for herself. Of course, after Naruto’s words she did stood up for a moment, and that was good, but it should have been a wake up call which altered her course. Instead, she kept doing the same she always did. If we take the Last movie into consideration, she’s still not strong enough to do anything even about her crush on Naruto. She needs genjutsu and Sakura to do the work for her. So even when it comes to the only thing she cares about 90 % of the time, which is Naruto-kun, she can’t do anything about it. That’s really sad.

”HINATA IS KIND AND SELFLESS”

There’s one mistake I see people make often, and that’s assuming characters that are quiet and shy are automatically kind. I wouldn’t say Hinata is as kind as the fandom makes her out to be. She simply comes off that way because you don’t really see her have her own opinions or disagree with the other characters. Hinata’s shyness on the other hand is most of the time a fetishized quirk to appeal to certain subset of fans. Her shyness doesn’t stop her from taking exams or hanging around Shino and Kiba, or talking to characters other than Naruto. She also has enough attitude to rub Neji’s status as a house slave in his face during their match, but because she stutters Naruto-kun every five minutes she’s supposedly kind. Kindness is shown through actions, not through standing around and stuttering. For comparison, we see Ino befriend an unpopular kid like Sakura, and give her confidence. That’s an act of kindness. Did Hinata ever cared about helping the branch members in any way? No.

She's supposedly "kind" but like I mentioned before she never shows this kindness by standing up for Naruto, or reaching out to him. She simply stares at him behind a tree and draws inspiration from his suffering. The only time she can actually stand up is to selfishly confess her love and die. She even said she felt like being selfish, and like I said she knew there was nothing she could do, she was told she’d only be in the way. She came there only to confess and commit suicide. This actually reminds me of another anime where this female character, after being unable to receive a male character’s love killed herself in front of him and said ”now you’ll never forget me”.

In the end, she cares about nothing but her own hormonal urges. Hinata tried to help Naruto cheat to pass an exam at the risk of disqualifying her whole team. This is the first individual action we see her character take. Did she consider Shino and Kiba during that moment? No, she didn’t even have an inner conflict on whether she should do this, whether it’s right towards her teammates. Even Naruto considers he might get Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura all in trouble if he accepts Hinata’s offer, which is why he doesn’t do it. Then when Hinata wonders if she can cheer for Naruto during his and Kiba’s match, she thinks Kiba might get mad. It’s more about how Kiba views her rather than whether she should cheer for Kiba because they are in the same team and should support each other. During the Pain attack, she left an injured shinobi, who couldn’t move, to go to Naruto, even when said shinobi told her she would only be in Naruto’s way. She didn’t try to save people, she simply wanted to confess and act in front of Naruto. This is about a threat to the entire village, which includes her comrades and her sister and she’s thinking only about her romantic feelings towards a guy she had maybe two conversations with and who barely remembers she exists. How is she better than Sakura? War arc really was the icing on the cake that Hinata’s character is only about Naruto. We should not forget the infamous ”Naruto-kun’s hand is so big… so manly...” is that really the right time to be thirsty? When Neji just died? Shikamaru mentions that he could help out Naruto as a right-hand man and then Hinata thinks “I-I want to be by Naruto-kun’s side too.” Then there’s of course the scene where she starts running to Naruto, leaving her post and teammates, even when Naruto is a mile away and already in the hands of medical ninjas, and even that ends up her pathetically tripping over a rock. Kiba has to remind her to use her byakugan because she is too busy gushing about Naruto. Eventually her only last line is “Naruto-kun”, when everyone is put into IT. It’s like a parody by this point. She doesn’t have any concern for her sister, her father, her teammates, Kurenai or her baby. It’s just “Naruto-kun” like it always is. Even in the Last movie, she is knitting a scarf for Naruto during the mission where they’re supposed to save her sister. Who brings a scarf on a mission? Why is she thinking about her romantic gift to Naruto so much she has to take it with her on a mission which focus is saving her sister? She even looks more devastated when Toneri tores the scarf apart than she ever does for Hanabi’s sake. It’s just silly and selfish.

”HINATA IS A COMPLEX CHARACTER”

Is she complex though? Her development goes from standing behind a tree looking at her crush she never talks to, to committing suicide for feelings that could never be reciprocated, to… waiting that a genjutsu and Sakura guilt trip Naruto enough for him to be with her? Like I already mentioned her character revolves entirely around Naruto, she has no hobbies or interests we know of aside from him. She has no motivations aside from being by Naruto’s side. She once had an interesting goal and backstory, but that was never fully explored, and it turned into her wanting Naruto’s attention and thinking about him. Her clan plot was irrelevant, she showed no interest in wanting to be a leader or even wanting to make things better for the branch members. It’s funny because immediately after the ending, no one cared about the Hyuuga branch and how the storyline was dropped and had no resolution. It was only when Hinata was being attacked for not showing to care did her fans start to over-analyze all the panels looking for the tiniest little clue that might hint at some changes.

It’s possible to be both shy, anxious and quiet and also to be strong, motivated and have interests and dreams. Hinata is never strong for herself, she’s only strong to be with Naruto, to die for Naruto, to motivate Naruto, to have Naruto look at her even for a moment. All the while Naruto doesn’t pay much attention to her unless she’s literally dying in front of him or she slapped him. Even when a big climax is happening, what’s on her mind is always her romantic feelings and her crush. I saw someone say if she were a male character, and she pulled this pointless sacrifice and theatrical confession in the final fight of an arc, she would’ve been universally mocked. Actually, I think even if it was Sakura who did this instead of Hinata the former would have been mocked, because their stans are unable to see the same flaws in their own fave as they see in the other girl. Naruto is a battle manga, characters are supposed to contribute to the defeat of the villain in some material way. The only reason people praise Hinata for what she did in the Pain arc is because they either pity her or because they’re men who think women killing themselves for a man is great because it boosts their ego.

I also notice many Hinata fans don’t notice the vanity in their own fandom. They call Hinata “princess”, ”heiress”, ”Konoha’s first lady” and draw fanart glorifying these concepts and how it makes Hinata good, because they like the superficial status, what they don’t care is the titles are unearned. I thought Hinata’s appeal was that she’s the underdog and a loser? Or maybe her real appeal is the idea of getting everything you want without doing much in order to get it?  Another claim is that Hinata is the perfect woman, which you might see from men. This is what I might dislike the most. Men judge Hinata’s worth and whether she’s a good character based on what kind of woman they want and think is the right kind of woman. Hinata has big breasts, she’s submissive, she has no other interests than the man she likes, and she’s the only girl in her class who didn’t go for the popular guy. Many men hate Sakura, Ino and Karin for being fangirls but praise Hinata for being a fangirl. Basically to them if a character is a fangirl of the wrong guy, she’s a stupid slut. If she fangirls their self insert, she’s wife material and the ideal woman. If Sakura has to be saved, she’s useless. If Hinata tries to kill herself for Naruto, she’s ”so kind”. Rin is a one-dimensional character, but Hinata saying Naruto-kun for the 50th time is depth. Hinata is also claimed to be better than the other girls because she had more kids and thus is more ”fertile”. It’s like feminism never happened and we are back to the 16th century. Why are we judging women’s worth on how many kids they have and how much they can please a man?

I could also talk about how Studio Pierrot turned Hinata into a hentai bait for otakus, which also plays a part in her popularity, but I don’t think it’s necessary, so I will just offer this picture which speaks for itself.

END NOTE

Hinata is simply just a sexist stereotype, a shadow of a real woman, with not much depth, and who is certainly not better than Sakura either. Both of them are fangirls whose characters revolve around men. It’s wild to me how there are women who genuinely act like one must be a misogynist if they reject Hinata’s superficial, one-dimensional and boy crazy character. Her character itself is misogynist for crying out loud. And honestly, what does it say when even the creator himself assumes that Hinata is someone’s favorite character because he must like big boobs?

[depressedhatakekakashi]

So half the reason’s you list for people loving someone are pure BS so how are they better actually?

Sasuke loves itachi cuz he feels safe and admired him? As a child, sure, but that ended when Itachi murdered their clan and tortured him (twice) and never should have returned. How do you feel love for someone who slaughtered your parents and made you relive that scene thousands of times? That’s BS.

Minato loving Kushina for her strength is bullshit cuz 1) shallow af reason to love a person. 2) we never get to see Kushina being truely powerful in a fight so these are just words to pump her up when we as a fandom know we’ll never actually get to see it because instead of highlighting her skills Kishi decided to have her teach golden boy Minato all of t hem so he could be the bestest at everything.

‘Asuma was a kind teacher’ where was this stated? For Shikamaru sure that makes sense, but where do we see him being such a good kind teacher to Ino and Choji? They have like no scenes together. Why do Ino and Choji love their Sensei When he barely does anything with them?

Naruto ‘finds out why he likes sakura’ but never actually atates why and then in the last it’s suddenly because of his rivalry with Sasuke and never meant anything? So he’s contradicting himself?

And again, we have so many characters we just don’t have any reason for, ever

Shikatema sure fandom can come up with reasob’s for why they love each other, but there’s never a stated reason.

SaiIno the same thing except Fandom has less to work with on why they ever fell in love.

Obito never states why he loved Rin and his love was a driving force behind a lot of his actions, including saving Kakashi at the end. So as far as Kakashi knows, you don’t need a reason.

That’s his experience.

That’s the life he has lives

Rin loves him but he never knew a reason and she loved him at his WORST so in his eyes this is clearly a bad case of ‘i just love him because’

Obito loves Rin but never states a reason as to why

I doubt Minato ever told his student’s ‘oh ya i love Kushina because she’s powerful’ so it’s more likely that Kakahsi, Obito and Rin just saw him loving her and assumed that was how it was. No reason needed.

And then you tack on Kakashi’s trauma. Kakashi, the boy who did love his friends even when he was at his worst and their bonds were strained, and then lost them.

The boy who has buried so many precious people and never had the chance to tell them that he cared. That they were his friends, because he was so determined to protect himself from the same fate as his father that he tried to lock away his heart and be the perfect shinobi who always chose the mission first.

Just looking at Kakashi’s trauma you can see so many reason’s for why he truely believes what he does, and this isn’t to say Sasuke has to agree with him or follow what he says. His words are correct for HIM but not for Sasuke.

This is to say that just because YOU don’t see value in what he says doesn’t mean it’s ‘stupid’ or that ‘no one thinks that way’

Tons of people in the world think the same way as Kakashi, and they’re not ‘stupid’ or any other words you decide to use to describe this fictional character who said something you don’t agree with.

They’re just different from you, and that’s valid because everyone thinking the exact same is Boring af

[assortednarutoheadcanons]

Team 10 Is Feral™ And I Am Going To Tell You Why

As previously established (maybe, offhandedly) I believe that Team 10 is Feral™. So, a comprehensive list of the bullshit that Asuma encouraged and Konohagakure cried over because the Yamanaka Clan is the Worst Thing In The World™. It is not alphabetical, chronological, or organized in any shape or form.

Yamanaka Inomako blew up part of the Land of Earth during the 1st Shinobi World War and now the Yamanakas are forbidden to enter the Land of Earth without a number of ridiculous filing and things so Konoha generally just doesn’t formally send them there anymore.

This does not stop Ino as she went in and blew Iwagakure’s noble district to smithereens when she was 14.

Shikamaru figured out how to use his shadows to stab people. This has never been done before but he was bored and Ino is a chaotic gremlin.

Choji ripped a head off of a beast in the Forest of Death when they were 12. This is why they looked so beat up. They had to scrub all the blood out of their clothes and some of that stuff was acidic.

While Shikamaru has yet to beat Shikaku in a game of Shogi, Shikaku refuses to formally spar with him because Shikamaru taught his shadows to hold a knife and you don’t see it until it’s at your neck.

Inoichi actively encourages Ino to poison random ninjas. She has managed to stab every jounin sensei at least once (Kakashi she actively stabs randomly. He has the highest at 24 poisons). Asuma laughs every time that they show up at the flower shop and have to chug some nasty tasting antidote.

Choji is the only one who can stomach Sakura’s chakra, restoring medical balls. He actively hoards them and just eats them whenever he’s hungry.

When they were 15 (and chunin), they accidentally killed a god. They had to run because they had to do something else but they kept forgetting to grab it.

Ino learned how to rip heads off of people from watching Choji do it to a squirrel.

Shikamaru once slit his own thighs to get enough blood for Choji to do a blood seal. This horrified Team 8 the first time they watched this happen but for Team 10 it’s all routine.

Ino commits war crimes in other countries and then proceeds to forget to tell Tsunade because it wasn’t relevant to the mission she was originally assigned. Shikamaru usually has to inform her the next day because Ino regalled him and Choji with stories of her side quest and then Tsunade has to try and track Ino down but fails because Ino is in the Yamanaka Clan Post-Mission Coma.

Choji accidentally causes a hurricane in the Land of Water because Shikamaru bet him he couldn’t use Water Style but the only one any of them knew was Water Style: Unholy Storm so Choji did that and caused a hurricane. They still laugh about this.

While Ino is technically a ‘support ninja’ the Yamanaka Clan is a well known Fire Style Clan. While not like the Uchiha, Yamanakas are known in the Land of Earth as The Clan of Fire. Iwagakure nin flat out refused to work with Yamanakas.

Itachi met with the three once because he worked with Ino’s mother. He avoids all three like the plague because Ino was showing them how to cause a fire with a magnifying glass.

In another post, I said that Choji is the Team Mom. He always has food. The Akimichi clan (headcanon) is in charge of the Fuinjutsu department. Ergo, Choji constantly has a fully prepared meal at All Times™. He makes sure Shikamaru and Ino actually eat throughout the day.

That being said, once another person comes along, he’s just as feral as Shikamaru and Ino. He is willing to rip heads off shoulders, eat carrion and body slam enemies.

During the Asuma Revenge Mission, they were almost perfect Shinobi. Kakashi was fucking stressed the entire time because Ino didn’t try to poison him once, Shikamaru’s shadow had more knives that Kakashi had ever owned, and Choji briefly disappeared only to return with a fucking emu.

Taka was stressed during the war when they were babysitting Team 10.

The one time that Madara attacked Taka instead of Team 10, Team 10 went entirely feral. Shikamaru flung Choji who planted Shadow Aids (a bunch of metal rods at such an angle that they have a shadow), Ino connected the entire shinobi alliance so thoroughly that she became every single Shinobi in the Alliance and controlled them (without their consent) into Monsters™ and rip into the Akatsuki’s forces.

It was terrifying.

Tsunade still can’t look at Ino without feeling the Red Hot Rage that nearly cooked her from the Inside out.

Taka belongs to Team 10 and Team 10 is Feral™ and therefore more animalistic than Team 8.

Shikamaru bet Ino that she couldn’t take control of all of Konohagakure. Not only did Ino do it, she held all of it and made everyone never notice it. Shikamaru and Choji were the exceptions as they both needed to judge if she wins or Shikamaru does.

As a general rule of thumb, if someone bets Team 10 anything, they will do everything in their power to win that bet. This generally becomes the fact that they will always win the bet and the one who bet them will lose.

The reason Shikamaru developed new techniques for the Shadow Style is by bets between him and Ino. Choji tries to avoid betting things because he’s the Responsible One™.

Ino bet Choji that he couldn’t rip a head off of a beast and he then ripped one off a giant centipede in the Forest of Death while Ino and Shikamaru watched.

They applauded him accordingly.

Asuma is Stressed with the children. Mostly because every month they come up to him with a new technique of they’re already established Safe and Well Tested Jutsus That Do Not Cause Problems Later In Life and they’re techniques are Not Safe At All And Can Only Be Performed By Their Respective Clans.

Ino went and joined Orochimaru on a dare. She found some stuff and then proceeded to return to Konoha and it was never brought up again.

Ino infiltrated the Akatsuki out of boredom on another mission. Found more stuff, played a game of shogi with Uchiha Itachi and had a phenomenal conversation about guilt, talked with Konan for an hour and then left.

Yamato was paired with Choji for a mission. He spent most of it asking ‘What the fuck, Akimichi?’, ‘how did you get in there?’, ‘What do you mean that was Yamanaka Ino and Nara Shikamaru? They’re still in the village!’

It was very stressful for him. He loved Team 7 after that.

Ino once romanced Sasuke and then left. She told Shikamaru and Choji and they all laughed, but Tsunade was not very happy five years later when she finally heard the story from Sasuke after he was drunk and he, Ino, and Sai were in a polyamorous relationship.

The one person Team 10 refuse to go near is Team Gai because Ino poisoned Gai once and he immediately sweated it out. Team 10 fears Might Gai.

Anyways, Team 10 is Feral™ and does not care for those who are Not Theirs and has no problems ripping heads off shoulders. All the Jonin senseis are stressed, Kakashi the most, Gai the least because he doesn’t understand.

[beneathstarryskies]

Could I request a part 2 of the squirting headcanons? 🥺 this time, could it include Naruto, Neji, Lee, Sasuke and Shikamaru? If you'd rather, I'd also be happy with Tsunade and Orochimaru 😘😘 love you sooo much

One day I am gonna meet you in person, and I'm just gonna kiss your forehead because I'm in awe of your big brain. 🥺

Find part one here!

Naruto

Let’s get this out of the way: Naruto has ridiculous stamina. He can fuck you and make you cum so many times you’re crying from how overstimulated and sensitive you get.

 Naruto is super excited when he feels your walls clenching tight around him, and he knows you’re about to cum so hard on his cock. 

However, he is confused as fuck when you squirt on him. He’s soaked from your arousal. Honestly, at first, he might even make you feel a little embarrassed about it. 

He’s gonna stop mid-thrust with his eyes wide, “What the hell was that?”

You gotta explain it to him, both of you blushing like crazy as though you weren’t in the middle of fucking seconds earlier. 

Once he understands, he’s gonna so smug about it. Definitely is gonna brag about it to Sasuke, which Sakura overhears and knocks him over the head for. 

Naruto is definitely going to make it happen all the time, he loves it so much. Not just because it feels incredible to him, but because he knows it feels amazing to you too. 

Definitely keeps count of how many times he’d made it happen in one night. 

Neji

Neji planned this. He read about it in a book and decided he had to make it happen. 

The problem was, you weren’t expecting it. You noticed Neji was fucking you harder than usual, and seemed to have a purpose behind it. He was doing everything to make you cum as often and as hard as possible. 

Your eyes are rolled back as he begins pounding into your mercilessly, an orgasm building in your core. It’s so strong. You can tell this is going to completely wreck you. 

Your clench around him so tight he’s sure he’s gonna cum right along with you. Neji’s thighs are soaked, the sheets are soaked. Thank goodness he pulled his hair back before getting started. 

You’re gonna be the one like, “What the fuck was that?” 

Neji will explain it to you, with a little bit of a smug smile on his face. He’s absolutely down to try it again, but if you’re not he’s okay with it. 

He’s super proud of himself and thinks about it a lot when he’s away on missions for a long time. 

Lee

Lee’s stamina is rivaled only by Naruto’s. He can go for hours and hours, and with his drive to be the best at everything it’s gonna be a good time. 

 That being said, when you soak him in your juices during a particularly intense orgasm, he didn’t know what happened. He assumed it was a good thing, because you seemed pretty pleased. 

He was too embarrassed to ask you. So, he asked Guy instead. 

Guy didn’t know either. So he asked Kakashi. Kakashi’s soul left his body. He was not prepared to explain squirting to Guy. There’s a lot of things Kakashi can endure, but that was not one of them. 

So, finally, Lee just...Asks you. He’s so bashful about it because what if it was a bad thing? What if you’re embarrassed? Worst of all, what if you never want to fuck again? 

He is so relieved when you explain to him that it’s actually a good thing, and super pleasurable. 

“So, what you’re telling me is that I’m the best at sex?” 

Sasuke

Sasuke knows your body like the back of his hand. It doesn’t take him long to push you over the edge, and he can do it multiple times. When he learns about squirting he sees it as an interesting challenge. 

He knows it takes a lot of patience and some vigorous work to achieve. So, he has a plan. From the moment he starts, he’s telling you how he’s gonna make you squirt all over him. 

Sasuke goes down on you for ages, making you cum over and over with his tongue and fingers before he actually starts fucking you. 

Then he’s merciless from the start. His hand is on your neck to hold you down as he pounds into you with a purpose. 

When you squirt all over him, he doesn’t stop fucking you. He just keeps pounding into you until you’re crying from the overstimulation. 

Sasuke is super into it, by the way. He’s always trying to push himself (and you) so he’s always keeping track of how many times he’s made it happen in a night. 

Shikamaru

Shikamaru is an expert at making you cum super intensely. He knows your body inside and out. Squirting is not something he’d do on purpose usually. 

He’s made it happen many times on accident because if he’s super frustrated or angry, he tends to take it out on your cunt. There’s nothing that relaxes him more than being buried deep inside you and just focusing on getting you both off. 

When it does happen he is very smug about it, “Oh, you like this cock so much you can’t even control yourself?” He’ll rub your clit as he keeps pounding into your cunt, working you towards doing it again. 

“I guess you want to make a mess,” he’ll goad you as he brings you to the edge of doing it again. 

He likes the little stroke his ego gets from making you cum so hard, and knowing nobody else could get you off so effectively. 

[kyriolex]

You know, I think Shino may be the only Konoha 11 member who I have never seen anyone Hate

All the others K11, I have seen at least 1 person hate them but never Shino.

Sure you can argue it's cause Shino doesn't get much screentime but how would that explain the hate that Tenten gets?

Shino is truly the best Konoha 11 member. There's literally no reason to hate him

Behold! A non-scientific ranking of the members of Konoha 11, from best to worst, judged solely by the size of their pre-Boruto hate-dom:

Shino Aburame: His blessing and his curse is that he's very forgettable. Not enough people pay attention to him to build a hate-dom.

Choji Akimichi: The manga and anime dunk on him ruthlessly for his weight, but I don't see many fans hating him. He's too nice.

Tenten: She managed to dodge most of the shipping wars, but she's also a feminist, so some trolls will hate her by default.

Rock Lee: He's popular enough to get his own spin-off, and his visibility alone makes him a target sometimes.

Kiba: Let's be honest: Part 1 Kiba is kind of an asshole. He gets better, but his role as Naruto's first rival doomed him popularity-wise.

Shikamaru: His early misogyny did him no favors, but unlike Kiba, he got enough screen time and cool fights to undo his early setbacks.

Ino: Her hate-dom goes out of their way to paint her as a mean-girl type, mostly because she was the Sakura's rival and not because of anything she actually did.

Neji: He was cruel to Hinata in the chuunin exams, but his sacrifice in the war canceled out enough bad karma to save him from the bottom tiers.

Hinata: According to her hate-dom, this girl is a stalker yandere whose fight with Pein was a manipulation tactic to guilt-trip Naruto and steal him from his true love, [insert favorite Naruto pairing here].

Naruto: Naruto went from being a plucky underdog to the reincarnation of ninja Jesus himself, and a lot of the fans never forgave him for going full Chosen One on them.

Sakura: She rejected the protagonist's romantic affections for years, and even when she caved and agreed to date him, she didn't do it the "right" way, which makes her evil incarnate in some people's eyes.