#restriction tw

[interstellarstorms]

I’m gonna vent about restricting food but it’s due to a colonoscopy tomorrow, not for ED purposes. Still tagging #restriction tw and this plus similar vents will be under a cut.

Just know that this isn’t me relapsing at all and I have no intentions of relapse ❤️

I’m already weak from not eating and I had food at 7:30 pm last night so I still have until about 2 pm tomorrow (after my procedure) when I get to eat.

[saddi3grl]

[whoreishghost]

i am like Not able to eat basically at all rn and this has beem ongoing for like 3-4 ish weeks now. in the first 2 weeks i cld eat a bit more but still like rlly way way too little and when i had my adhd review i was pretty surprised i had acc gained a bit of weight so i just sort of brushed off the not eating as me misremembering how much ive eaten. but now i like, am basically on a liquid only diet (and i cant drink anything thicker ? ig than like a diet coke bc that also makes me feel sick, tried having a milkshake at one point and i felt soooooo bad) bc 1 i like just dont get hungry at all, and 2 even if i feel ig the closest thing to describe wld be peckish (like im craving a specific flavour or texture) by the time i start eating it i rlly rlly do not want to be and its like, u know when ur so full its like hard to chew and u just want to spit the food out? like that. ive been trying very hard to like force myself thru this by like letting myself eat and buy whatever food i want at literally any time of day bc while it is expensive ive lost kind of a lot of weight v quickly (tw ed: this is about as much as id lose in a month whilst restricting v heavily in just under than 2 weeks). its worked to a degree but honestly im mostly just wasting food and honestly money, and whenever i do manage to eat a bit, itll be like 1 small size serving of poke (currently the only food that has been tolerated even slightly, ig maybe bc it has a "fresh" flavour? idk) eaten over the course or 5-6 hours bc i cldnt eat it faster than that which even then was not rlly tolerated bc i felt fucking disgusting physically, and then basically anything else (eg a genuinely really nice tasting stew my wife made, a mozzarella and avocado sandwich, just an avocado w salt, pasta, etc) makes me so nauseous and uncomfortable that i have to go force myself to throw up right after ive eaten to not literally be in hell for like 8-9 hours (i have an extremely low tolerance for managing nausea and the amazing ability to basically never throw up ever by myself hence the "forcing myself" which yes bad but also i refuse to be regurgitating and getting acid reflux whilst in pain for that whole day because i tried to eat smthn). i originally thought it was probably psychological bc ive been doing v v badly and to a degree it is (i cba to cook or eat rlly) but even when i have the food to eat i cant do it then either? idrk what to do, i have brought it up to drs multiple times who just tell me its poor mental health management and imply i need to ig "try harder". theres also the fact that it is v triggering for my disordered eating brain bc i am unintentionally restricting a lot and i am losing a lot of weight and its been v difficult not to just spiral down that sort of thought process into just not eating at all. feeling kind of like this is either gna randomly stop at some point and itll just be a confusing period of my life or im going to get v v unwell without support and be blamed for it

[dollsiescale]

🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg 🕯️ -10kg

[joy-bug]

you can still enjoy foods you love but you have to remember that portion size matters ! 🎀

(for my girlie's who struggle with b¡ng¡ng 😓)

[ju1cyl0ve08]

"im not hungry this is just what f@t l0ss feels like"

- quote from random gym bro on tiktok

[sk3sh]

things to do instead of eating!! 🖤

- pluck your eyebrows if they‘re slightly overgrown

- practice an instrument if u play one

- decorate your room / rearrange it

- read a book (preferably outside)

- go on walks

- call with some friends

- go on tumblr ( obvious lol )

- search for some healthy recipes

- bake something for friends / relatives

- try a new hobby ( i absolutely love crocheting )

- make some handmade gifts ( perfect for christmas )

- try out a new makeup style

- put some cute outfits together u wanna wear if you reach your gw

- browse through online shops

- listen to new music

these are some things i do! let me know if you have more ideas <3

[kissycatemoji]

M3alsp0!! <333

[l0py]

[birthdaycakebones]

it’s always a walk of shame back

[reckoner5]

me returning to edblr after trying to recover 💀

[pr0jectdontdie]

Mealspo˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Here’s some meals that actually look appetizing lol😇 yum

[saddi3grl]

[beatrixx1212]

i want to look how i look when i suck in

[dollsiescale]

make me beautiful ♡.

[joy-bug]

୨୧ wish i had the type of 3Đ where you forgot about eating/hated food. i count down every hour until i can eat again . . 😓