#redacted incorrect quotes

[no-see-um-incorrect]

Asher making fun of Bad human made OmegaVerse media

Dramatically sprawled out on David’s desk

Asher: bUTT alpha~! You are already mated to another WE cannot be so close~ your mate may smell my-

Very tired David: -Asher if you say one more word I am kicking you out of the pack and making Sam my new beta

[capitalisticveins]

Guy: What language do they speak at the center of the Earth?

Guy: Core-ean 😃!!

Honey: The center of the Earth is around 5430 degrees celsius. Nobody is going to live there so they don’t NEED a language.

Guy: Core-ean 😄!!

[redactahoe]

Darlin: *rips piece of paper* take it

Angel: is this? Are you giving me your number?

Darlin: you can reach me any time

Angel: but, for what?

Darlin: if anyone gives you troubles just call me

Darlin: I’ll fucking kill em’ for ya’

[miyaheestar]

just some random funny texts

[starlitangels]

Treasure: Who hurt you?

Porter: What, do you want a list?

Treasure, pulling out knives: Actually yeah

Sorry this is all that was going through my head the whole audio

[whorefordarlin]

Darlin': Sorry I'm late, I broke down on the way here

David: Is your motorcycle working fine now?

Darlin': Motorcycle? Yeah it's fine, why?

David:

Darlin':

[frog-0n-a-l0g]

Angel: yo what up pookie badookie

David: don’t ever call me that again

Angel: ok home-slice

[piffany666]

Porter: coffee or tea?

Vincent: coffee

Porter: wrong its tea

[crysoon]

angel, presenting their dish for the first time after cooking lessons: thoughts?

david: and prayers

[starspeckedsys]

These are so Asher coded it’s beautiful

[pandoraroid]

milo: there wasn't any signal inside the church so i couldn't receive your calls and texts.

asher: the holy spirit was interfering.

[no-see-um-incorrect]

When Porter and Vincent(+lovely) witness Sam being all cute/sexy-like with Darlin they will act like a couple grossed out kids watching their parents kiss

Sam: let me get a kiss from my darlin~ *Kissing Commences*

Porter: UGH-*Gagging noises*

Vincent: eweweweweEWEWEWEW!!

Lovely: MY EYES!!!!!!!

[capitalisticveins]

Asher: You can kiss any person in the world’s feet, who would it be?

Sam: My beautiful partner, Darlin’☺️

Asher: They don’t count you do that anyway🤨

Sam: David Shaw👀

[redactahoe]

[set before darlin moves in with sam, in the pack den, they are coloring at the coffee table]

pack kid: where do you live?

darlin': in the city.

pack kid: do you have a house?

darlin: apartment.

pack kid: own or rent?

darlin: rent.

pack kid: what do you do for a living?

darlin: lots of things.

pack kid: where's your office?

darlin: i don't have one.

pack kid: how come?

darlin': i don't need one.

pack kid: where your wife?

darlin': don't have one.

pack kid: how come?

darlin': its a long story.

pack kid: do you have kids?

darlin': no, i don't.

pack kid: how come?

darlin’: its an even longer story.

pack kid: are you David's [brother/sister/sibling]?

darlin': what's your record for consecutively asked questions?

pack kid: 38

darlin': I'm David's [brother/sister/sibling] alright.

pack kid: you have a lot more scars than David does.

darlin': how nice of you to notice.

pack kid: I'm a kid, that's my job.

[anexistingexistence]

I have a real Freelancer-type post in my drafts rn

[starlitangels]

David, nervous, looking at Angel across the way early in their relationship: You really think they’re the person for me?

Asher: Oh yeah! They’re tons of fun, and you’re no fun at all

Asher, drawing a heart in the air with both hands: They “complete” you