#really fricking good

[mijetboi]

blender is cool

3d models are fun to make, highly recommend learning, it's pretty straightforward once you get into it

[httpiastri]

i'm actually so pissed that i don't even know where to start..... i've been trying to ignore this for hours but i just can't ☹️

dear everyone on f1blr, i kindly ask you to take franco's name out of your mouth if you don't know him. do not talk about his story if you don't know it. do not call him a pay driver, do not compare him to drivers whose dads are the owners of an f1 team. do not talk shit about him if it's all going to be made-up rumors.

you may hate james vowles as much as you wish to, i don't give a fuck. williams are doing some real random and stupid shit. but is any of this franco's fault? no!! if you'd actually seen him and taken more than 5 minutes trying to learn about him, you'd see how sweet of a person he is and how much he deserves this opportunity, so don't go around spreading lies about it.

[pixlokita]

readin thru patient 46 dialogue and like

Is this why Greg made those comics ? Is that why he drew the ending comics ? Oh my gosh it didn’t click until now 😭 I feel so dumb dang

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

How You Turn My World; Chapter 4

You finally find your way into the labyrinth, coming across some new and old faces; both friendly and malicious.

Character; Lilia Vanrouge

Content; Gender-neutral reader, reader is getting tired of being stuck here and smelling like a bog

Content Warnings; Swearing, some talk of death, reader passes out

Word Count; 2.2 K

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 |

As per usual, don't put my work into AI.

You were finally making some decent progress, what, with not being stuck in some bog and knowing somewhat of where you were going. A vast improvement really! Well, it would be, but unfortunately, you still reeked of rotten eggs and skunk — apparently the bog stench only got worse the longer it stayed on.

“Why did it have to dump me into the swamp,” you huffed, rounding yet another corner. “Like, it could have dumped me beside the water, but, no, no, let’s dump the magicless human right into the putrid bog water! A good guffaw, don’t you think? Ha ha ha HA!”

At least your au de Bog of Eternal Stench kept any would-be assailants away since you hadn’t run into anything (besides a rose bush, ouch) since you started making your way through the labyrinth. So maybe it wasn’t all that bad… damn, maybe your sense of smell was just used to it… hey, if stink helps you not die, then you would gladly stay stinky! Well, bitterly stay stinky is more like it.

“Assholes,” you muttered, rounding another corner. 

But it wasn’t a corner; it was a crossroad. Three paths merged off of the one you were on.

… aren’t labyrinths just one long line? THIS IS A FUCKING MAZE?! You groaned, looking at your possible options which all looked exactly the same.

Decisions, decisions, decisions. Of course nothing is easy here, no no no! Gotta make things difficult now.

The hedge behind you rustled, and you whipped around, getting into a stance where you could either land a pretty good sucker punch to the hedge-stalker or make a mad dash away. But out of the hedge crawled out a small, fuzzy, caterpillar. And back at home you would have thought it was cute, but you learned your lesson from the doors; don’t trust it, or anyone for that matter.

You looked down at the caterpillar, and the caterpillar looked up at you, blinking slowly. 

What are the chances… 

“Do you know a way out,” you asked the caterpillar, crouching down so that you didn’t tower over it.

The caterpillar blinked at you again (apparently caterpillars in the Underground have eyelids, which isn’t the weirdest thing considering everything). “No,” it chirped and continued crawling on its merry way, wherever that may be. “But you’ll find the way.” And it disappeared into the growth of the maze, humming a little tune to itself.

You sighed, and pushed yourself back up, straightening out your shoulders and looking up to the sky. “I’ll find a way,” you breathed, looking up at the cloudless sky which was starting to turn a brilliant amber with the setting sun. “I might want to find a way is more like it.”

You looked back down to the ground, looking at the three paths in front of you. They all look the same, save for the ground making up paths themselves, with the middle and right paths looking well worn with travel. And while they may be well worn, there was a voice at the back of your head that was whispering caution. The left-most path was not as well travelled, with dead vines covering parts of it.

“Hopefully you’re right, little buddy since I could use all the luck I can get.” And you made your way down the path, hoping that it was the correct one and didn’t lead you to your death or some other unpleasant thing.

…

…

Lilia was at the entrance of the labyrinth, in front of the two doors.

“Have you seen a human, about this tall, a bit of a temper, and smelling foul,” he asked the doors.

The doors looked at each other before looking at Lilia. “And what’s it to you,” they said in unison.

Lilia smiled, but it was one of mild annoyance, not joy or amusement. “Royal orders I fear. You wouldn’t want the mistress finding out about you both tampering with a royal matter, would you?” The smile turned cat-like since Lilia had backed them into a corner.

The doors paled, with the blue door speaking up. “No no, sir! We would never dream of such a thing!!! Yes, there was a human, a wretched one at that, horribly rude!”

Lilia hummed, cocking a brow at the door. “I do think wretched is a bit of an overstatement now,” he whispered to himself. “Well, tell me where about they are then. The sooner I can collect them, the better for you lot.”

The red door sighed, “Near the heart of it, they took the left path.”

Left path? Why the left path leads to… Shit. Lilia mentally groaned, knowing that regardless of the path you took, you would end up having to deal with them eventually. “Your cooperation has been noted,” is what he said though, giving the doors both a nod before turning into a bat and flying over the labyrinth, trying to find you before you ran into whoever them was.

“Please be clever enough not to die,” he whispered to no one, hoping that he didn’t have to deliver your body to the Queen.

…

…

The left path brought you to what looked like a forest; with old-growth trees, ferns and moss covering the ground, and a list mist hanging in the air. It was peaceful and beautiful, with the setting sun illuminating the mist without burning it away.

But that would not last, night was fast approaching and you had nothing to protect you this time; no rowan tree to haul your ass up, and no sort of weapon to protect yourself besides the oh-so-lovely smell of the bog to deter something from eating you. You were pretty sure it would also keep away anything that wanted to otherwise snatch you up.

“AH!” Something jumped out from a tree, and you couldn’t fully register what it was since you were also screeching, much like the creature was at you; you with fright, the creature with amusement and joy.

Two other creatures jumped out from behind the trees and startled cackling, jumping, and clapping. Together, they surrounded you, with no way to really escape them without fighting through.

… you really should have read about fae species, since you didn’t know what they exactly were, or how dangerous they were either. 

One pulled you near a pit and lit a fire, cackling in glee and dancing, trying to get you to join them. “Ah come on, human, have some fun! DANCE BABEY!!!!”

But you stayed still as more creatures came out of the shadows, dancing around the fire, giggling, cackling, and pulling a bit at your clothes to prompt you to join them. You didn’t know, cementing your feet down, your eyes watching their movements with caution.

‘Should you dance with the fae, you shall not stop dancing until you exhaust yourself. And once you wake up, you will continue dancing. This cycle will repeat itself until you dance to death.’ 

At least that was what the book said, and so you stayed still, regardless of how much the creatures pulled at you. While it looked like a grand old time, you remained where you were.

“I don’t have time for dancing,” you answered coldly, flinching from pinching fingers. You were also a bit shocked that Eau de Bog of Eternal Stench wasn’t keeping them away. Either, they couldn’t smell, or, they didn’t care that you smelled downright awful. “So this ‘baby’ won’t dance.”

And should I be offended by you calling me ‘baby’ or am I reading too much into it?

The main creature just shrugged and spun its dancing partner around. “Your loss human! More fun for us then! YIPPEE!!!” And it threw something in the fire to where you could feel the heat on your face.

What now? You were just standing there awkwardly as the creatures danced about, singing something that you couldn’t really make out. All you knew was that the heat, noise, and the dizzying dance of them was making your head pound, and throat scream in thirst. You hadn’t drank anything for over a day(?) — no, bog water did not count — and the heat from the fire made the thirst only worse. Shit.

“Ah, you don’t look too… hot there human,” one of the creatures snickered at its own joke at your expense. “Maybe if you dance with us, loosen up and have a bit of fun, then you can have a drink? Hmm? Dancing won’t kill you!” But its failed attempts at covering up its own malicious giggles were more than enough to stand your ground… which was coming at you quite fast since you practically collapsed.

Was it the thirst? The pounding migraine that wanted nothing more than to crawl into some dark hole and hide? Or your exhaustion from making that tiring trek, crawling yourself out of the bog and making the trek again, or the hours you had spent wandering around the maze with no real idea of where you were going? All you really knew was that you were now on the ground with the creatures poking at you to see if you were still alive.

“Aw, man! Are they already dead? That’s no fun!” One of the creatures pouted, raising up your arm, and you let it plop back to the ground. “Come on human! Get up! You’re not a party pooper are you?”

Scre you buddy! Can’t you read the situation?!

You were trying your best to stay quiet, which wasn’t all that hard, since all of your energy was gone. 

“They best not be,” a familiar voice called out.

From your position, you couldn’t see who it was, but you could make out the creatures jumping away from you like you were the hot fire instead of the fire pit. But someone else was approaching until you could make out a pair of shoes in front of your face.

They crouched down beside you, placing their fingers gently at the base of your throat; taking your pulse. “Hmph, playing dead, are we, Beastie?”

That irritating chuckle. The annoying nickname. Those mischievous magenta eyes that now looked at you with curiosity and amusement.

It was him — Mr. Sparkles.

And he had just blown your act of playing possum (well, not really, since you had actually collapsed).

But you didn’t say anything, instead favouring to give him a dirty look. Yet he just shook his head in jest, and proceeded to pick you up and wrap you around his shoulders and neck like some sort of bizarre ermine pelt; better than being carried like a sack of potatoes or the bridal carry you supposed.

“Her majesty sends her regards for not turning or killing her guest,” Lilia offered the creatures. It would be such a waste and pity to see such an entertaining Beastie leave us too soon now. “But do know she won’t take to their condition lightly.”

My condition? I’m not some Victorian child with some unknown illness wreaking havoc on their body you know?! But all that you did was groan and cough. You couldn’t even cough in Mr. Sparkles’ (Lilia’s) face, since you had a lovely view of the moss-covered ground and the fae’s shoes.

He patted the back of your calves, and you would have kicked him if you had more energy, but you didn’t. “Now, we really should be off, since Beastie has… an hour to get out of this maze before they turn into some sort of worm, or a hedge; never know what this old labyrinth will decide on really.” Lilia chuckled at the thought (was it merriment, or was he happy that you weren’t joining the caterpillar you met earlier?).

“No,” you wheezed. “WoRm!”

“See! They said it themself! No worm! How lovely that we are on a similar wavelength, Beastie! Marvellous even!” Lilia exclaimed, and the both of you started levitating off of the ground. “Now, do enjoy your party, Fireys!”

The creatures (Fireys apparently) groaned but got back to their party, dancing around the fire like they didn’t just try to lure you to your death mere minutes before.

“Tsk tsk, Beastie,” Lilia’s tutting brought your attention back to him and you grumbled. “You owe me two favours now, you know. Lucky that I found you… although that part wasn’t hard. I thought you learned your lesson the first time you decided to take a dip into the Bog of Eternal Stench?”

You lightly kicked him, letting your irritation be known, but Lilia just hummed. “Now now, no need to be like that! Do you want to smell like a bog when you meet the mistress? She wouldn’t take kindly to your… unique aroma.”

You hissed out a breath since he decided to pinch at your ear rather harshly — prompting for you to answer. “No,” you whispered hoarsely.

“Also, do read up on that book, since you will want to know about the government and fae species etiquette!”

From a smelly bog and fumbling around a maze for hours on end, to finding yourself being taken to fae high society… was it too late to become some worm in the maze? I think being a worm actually has a better chance of me living.

But sadly, you were saved from an eternity of being a worm. Hopefully, Mr. Sparkles (Lilia) would cover for your blunders a little for when you found yourself in front of ‘the mistress’.

...

...

...

...

To be continued!

~~~~~~~

Tags; @afunkyfreshblog @cheezy-moon @eynnwwyjth @identity-theft-101 @ithseem @lucid-stories @ryker-writes @twistwonderlanddevotee @xxoomiii

Link to Masterlist

[skyloftian-nutcase]

Four was honestly surprised how many people were here. It was his first big trip, and it was definitely overwhelming. He was usually a loner, but he had to admit… he was thankful he’d asked a friend to come along.

Legend laughed as he texted someone, face glowing with glee. He elbowed Four mischievously. “We should definitely send pictures to Wars.”

“Is that who you’re texting?” Four asked with a smile, enjoying the cheer from his usually grumpier friend. Legend adored education conferences - his friend was nothing if not a lover of learning and exploring new things.

“Oh absolutely,” Legend replied, showing his phone. “He’s upset because I went to the emergency medicine conference and then went to this one. Personally, I think he’s just jealous because I have a cert he doesn’t.”

“Wait, Wars doesn’t have his CCRN?” Four questioned, confused. He figured Warriors, who had everything in his life in order, would have his critical care nursing certification. It was fairly common for nurses in ICU and ED settings.

“Nope!” Legend quipped with delight, obviously ecstatic that he had something over the military nurse.

“Okay, but important question: where are we going to get dinner?”

“Somewhere it doesn’t cost half our paycheck.”

Four glanced around at the skyscrapers. “Uh… not sure we’re going to manage that. I didn’t think the Hebra Mountains had cities like this.”

“Well, then we can contemplate Brugada Syndrome and complicated EKG rhythms while we starve,” Legend supposed.

“Oh, don’t be like that,” Four laughed. “This is a trip, we shouldn’t worry about the cost too much.”

”We don’t make Time’s salary.”

“But we make decent salary.”

Legend bit his lips, stubborn. Four narrowed his eyes analytically. “This isn’t about how much the food costs; it’s because you’ve blown your budget on coffee, isn’t it?”

His friend immediately flushed, guilty as charged. “They charge ten rupees for coffee! Ten!! This place is ridiculous!”

“I told you your caffeine addiction would come back to bite you someday,” Four smiled. “Or, well, more so than it already has.”

“I swear, if you bring up the SVT episode one more time—”

[tizeline]

YOU LIKE EPIC THE MUSICAL?!

Bro lemme tell ya this damn musical isn't even FINISHED yet and it's one of my favorite musicals of all time. It might actually BE my absolute favorite, it's so damn good.

Fun fact, I mostly got into Epic in the first place because of the rottmnt fandom, on Tik Tok there's like a million rottmnt edits with the song Just A Man which I kept seeing and I was like "damn this is pretty good". I heard parts of a bunch of other songs too, but I never actually went and really listened to it until The Ocean Saga came out, I heard Ruthlessness and I immidietly went "okay I gotta listen to this already holy shit" and uh. Well I've been a bit obsessed with the musical ever since, let's just say that.

[coconut530]

RELIGIOUS TRAUMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[stinkypeanutbutter]

hear me out. .

ratatouille X dead plate

[sassyminnesotan]

Me (again) after watching Everything Everwhere All At Once for the second time ever:

[toxic-garbage-island]

GOJIRA DID THAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!

[sysig]

Can’t, too busy flirting ♥ (Patreon)

[royalarchivist]

Forever: It was actually pretty cool to talk with you, man.

Roier: No te preocupes, no worries.

Forever: I really– I really miss you and all of the Spanish people on the server more.

Roier: Me too, me too. I think the Spanish people will return very soon, because, you know, we– we have this La Velada thing, so... Then– then in a few days I think, maybe the Spanish people will– will– will connect more. Ok?

Forever: Yeah!!! That will be so good!

Roier: I– I'm just saying maybe! Maybe not! I dunno.

Forever: Yeah, maybe not, maybe not.

Roier: Maybe not.

Forever: But you know what? If InsaneDuo [him and Cellbit] becomes elected, we're going to make sure that the server is going to be fun for everybody–

Roier: Awww, ok, ok.

Forever: –so that we will have the creators that are gone– that are gone back to the server.

Roier: Yes, si, si !

[x22817]

HEK AND I JUST GOT ASKED IF WE WOULD LIKE TO BE THE DEMO DOG FOR OUR NEW SD TRAINER FRIEND

[cessmaga]

mini rant but I'm sorry but I don't want a goddamn omniverse continuation, there are so many bad continuity in there and retconing them is like putting a ductape on a big earthquake crack

also could we just create a new ben 10 continuity?? without the others holding it back?? ben 10's continuity is such a mess anyways (I mean look at kevin's backstory) and I want new fresh ideas surrounding ben 10

[melonthesprigatito]

Before Legends Arceus came out (so, two years ago whoops) I started coming up with my own Hisuian Ancestor and I spent a lot of time brainstorming (cough, cough daydreaming) about a hypothetical scenario of what their encounter would be like in the actual game. I tried to make it realistic as possible by making it seem like an actual event that could happen in the game, and the one thing I have to say is that it serves as the obligatory "Spooky Encounter" that's been in pretty much every Pokémon game since the Old Chateau.

I'm not going to tell you which character is the descendant of this ancestor just yet, because the story is better if you don't immediately know what's going on. All I can say is that this ancestor is the ancestor of a Gen 7 character.

The quest is intended to be more of a post game thing because it eventually leads into an Ultra Beast catching quest involving the space time distortions (which isn't the main focus, more of a bonus quest really). Think of it as a second update story quest like the Daybreak Update. I'm just going to call this entire thing the Nightfall Update I guess.

WARNING: SUPER LONG POST, FULL OF PLOT SUMMARY, HEADCANONS AND ART (Uh.... Don't read the post tags before clicking the blue read more button pretty please. Kinda spoilery

Update (2nd November 2024) : This is a full fanfic now! I'd recommend reading that before reading this post because it's basically massive spoilers. Like, recaps the entire story spoilers because I used this post to make that fic

To start the story quest you have to buy a special charm called the Otherworldly Charm from Lucille in Jubilife Village. Item description: ("A Mysterious charm made of an unknown material, discovered in Obsidian Fieldlands. It bears an inscription of a six pointed star.  Perhaps something will happen if you keep it around.") Why does she have this? Oh, she just found it lying out there in the field and thought it looked neat. Someone must have dropped it.

After you complete your expedition for the day, a short cutscene will occur. A random merchant from the Ginkgo Guild is making his way though the forest when he suddenly hears a noise behind him. He looks around, but it's completely silent. 

All of a sudden the merchant gets ambushed by the Miss Fortune Sisters. Unable to defend himself, he has no choice but to drop his goods and run. The bandits laugh among themselves at the successful robbery. They're still pissed that their scheme to steal the Origin Ore went up in smoke and they're just SOOO frustrated that the Player (in my case Akari) keeps absolutely destroying them in battle so this ambush was a morale boost for them.

Suddenly they hear a noise. Clover suspects it's another poor defenceless merchant unfortunate enough to cross paths with them, about to be robbed blind. A mysterious hooded, deathly pale figure with glowing eyes watches them from the treeline. The bandits are unnerved but launch into their motto anyway, because they're idiots, but become highly offended when the figure doesn't respond or show any sign of emotion at all. How dare they not acknowledge their perfectly rehearsed intro that strikes fear into people's hearts?! Coin says "Forget this, let's just rob them!" and lunges at the ghostly figure and she instantly gets hit with a blast of lightning coming from the figure's hand. 

The screen goes black and it cuts to the beginning of the quest.

Quest [Insert Number Here Because I Forgot How Many Quests Are In This Game]: The Witch of the Woods 

The sidequest continues when you talk to Ginter from the Ginkgo Guild. He is upset because some of the guild's merchants have been suffering from an increased number of attacks from bandits and supplies in the village have started mysteriously vanishing. At the same time, people have spotted a mysterious pale figure sneaking about Jubilife Village in the dead of night, stealing items such as food and clothing and rumours have started to spread around that it might be the evil witch that supposedly lives in a dark cave, deep in the woods at the edge of the Obsidian Fields which has gotten everyone in a panic because they're afraid that the witch might go after their children next.

Ginter doesn't believe in witches so he suspects that this supposed witch might be behind the thefts of the Ginkgo Guild stock, so he wants the player to look into the rumours and put a stop to them. At this point Zisu approaches them because she's heard ALL about this wicked witch and is really eager to join the investigation. As the Captain of the Security Corps, she feels that it's her duty to defend Jubilife Village from any threat so she wants to look into the rumours about this supposed witch so she can come up with a plan to defend the village from them if she needs to.

Current objective: Investigate the rumours in Jubilife Village (I'm using these quest objectives as a way to break up the giant wall of text. I can't remeember if the quest objective does update as you progress because I haven't played in months but whatever)

So Zisu tags along with the player and they start asking around Jubilife Village about the witch to gain more insight into the rumours. Several people recount different bits of information, but the most damning evidence is a tale from one farmer in particular who tells them a story about how one night when he was working in the fields, a big hole opened up in the sky, and what came out of it was this inhumanly pale woman with glowing eyes that spoke in a language he didn't understand. The farmer had the everloving crap scared out of him because he was convinced that this woman was an evil being that emerged from the underworld (a kid friendly way of saying that he thought it was a demon from hell) so he gathered some of the other villagers and they chased the witch off into Necro Forest.

Zisu is excited because "Sweet! Now we have enough evidence! Let's go investigate that forest then!"

Current objective: Head to the Necro Forest, north of the Obsidian Fieldands

What happens next is an escort mission where the player has to take Zisu across the Obsidian Fieldlands by fending off any wild Pokémon to a new area unlocked exclusively by this quest called the Necro Forest (Eterna Forest in the modern day) which is filled with Ghost Types. The background music is the Night Time Field theme no matter what time of day it is, or maybe a remix of the Old Chateau theme.

Later the Miss Fortune Bandits are encountered in the Necro Forest and they're running for their lives as they crash into Akari Barry Style (Charm dragging a paralysed Coin behind her). Charm is immediately aggressive but resists the temptation to battle Akari, especially because she's accompanied by the head of the Security Corps. Zisu asks what happened to Coin, and Clover freaks out about a witch in the woods that casted a lightning spell on Coin.

Akari wants to help Coin but the other two bandits are vehemently opposed to accepting help from some "Galaxy grunts." So Zisu purposefully drops a Cheri Berry on the ground and is like "Oh noooo, I dropped my berry! It would be a shame if it got stolen by bandits!" and Clover begrudgingly "steals" it, and the flee the scene, saying that you'd have to be stupid to go after the witch.

Eventually the Player and Zisu reach the cave which is supposedly the witch's home and at first Zisu doesn't want to go in because she's been pretty spooked the whole time in the forest, then she tries to play it off like she's not scared at all "What? I'm not f-f-frightened or anything! Let's just go!" then she dashes into the cave.

Current objective: Explore the Necro Cavern!

There is no cave in modern day Eterna Forest. The idea is that the land was dug into and smoothed out in order to build the Old Chateau on top of it. Its a small cave with a suspicious lack of Pokémon inside. The music is the cave theme that only appeared in the cave with the torches that you pass though with Ingo. I dunno, I just think that theme should have played in more than one location.

At the end of the cave, they discover an open chamber filled with signs that it's been lived in, such as scraps of food and clothing lying everywhere as well as a makeshift bed on the floor. Zisu finds the stolen merchandise in the far end of the chamber and runs towards it, while the player notices some weird looking metal things lying in the corner. Zisu comes screaming in the opposite direction "IT'S HER! IT'S THE WITCH!" and immediately uses the player as a human shield. The player turns to see a pair of glowing eyes in the darkness, orange pupils with silvery blue irises. As well as the eyes, she has weirdly pale blue skin and she's wearing a stolen dark green torn cloak over some sort of dirty grey and blue futuristic clothing. Her hair is an absolute mess, riddled with sticks and leaves and she has sun burns all over her face.

All in all, she does look like some sort of evil forest witch, and she's started to freak out about the intruders, showing a particularly negative reaction to Zisu in particular and Akari gets dragged into a Pokémon battle. The witch sends out a Poipole aka a Pokémon that no-one in Hisui has ever seen before, and honestly if the player has any Psychic or Ground Types it gets defeated very easily.

After the battle, the witch is still freaking out, but now she just seems more terrified and upset. She quickly grabs a stick and starts brandishing it at Zisu, trying to scare her off. Zisu squeals like a little girl because she thinks the witch is waving some sort of magic wand at them but Akari puts herself between her and the witch and tries to diffuse the situation.

Nothing seems to be working until Akari has the idea to show her the Otherworldly Charm in case it belongs to her because the charm resembles the other strange metallic objects in the cave.

Akari holds the charm out as a peace offering and the woman recognising the charm, hurriedly snatches it out of the Akari's hands and backs away again. It finally hits Zisu that she's not a witch at all, just a really strange looking desperate woman.

The witch calms down a little because now she knows they're not a threat since they're not attacking her and the Player was kind enough to give her the charm back, but she's still really uneasy.

Zisu tries to ask her who she is and what she's doing here, but she doesn't understand a single thing she's saying. The woman shakes her head and tries to respond and it becomes very clear that the woman doesn't speak the Hisuian language at all and Zisu doesn't recognize the language she speaks either.

Zisu is perplexed at how they're supposed to help her when there's a language barrier, but she decides that at least they should tell her their names and try to get across that they want to help her in some way.

Zisu points at herself and says "Zisu", then she points at the player and says "Akari" (or whatever name you picked for your player) and the woman is confused at first, but then she catches on to what she's trying to say, so she points at herself and says "Hijiki."

Hijiki frowns for a moment until she suddenly decides to do charades to try to communicate with them. She mimes writing in a notepad and Zisu grabs a pen and a notepad from her bag and hands it to her.

Hijiki finds it way easier to communicate with drawings so after a while she flips the notepad over again to show them.

The first drawing is an image of a sad face and some strange device that has smoke coming out of it. Zisu is confused and Hijiki gets frustrated and points at the pile of metal objects. She walks over and grabs a small device from the pile and Zisu acknowledges that it even though she has no idea what it is, it looks very broken.

The second image is a crude drawing of several Pokémon: Luxray, Raichu, Electabuzz and Jolteon, surrounded by lightning bolts.

The third image is of lightning striking the device, making it look shiny and new, with a picture of a smiley face beside it.

Zisu is still confused but she deduces that Hijiki needs the Pokémon in the image to fix whatever her strange device is. The idea is that she needs electricity to charge her device again and it's up to the player to go out and catch these Pokémon and bring them back to her. Zisu decides to stay with Hijiki DEFINITELY not because she doesn't want to go back into the forest again, no sirree, she has to protect Hijiki and although Hijiki doesn't want her to stay with her, it's not like she can speak up and object so she just stays silent and anxious.

Current Objective: Catch the Pokémon from Hijiki's drawings and bring them back to her.

One catching quest later, the Player gives Hijiki the Pokémon and she starts tinkering on her device with whatever tools she has on her. The Pokémon strike her device with lightning and when she's finished, she attaches the device to her belt and has a distinctly relieved look on her face.

The device gets switched on and immediately Hijiki starts to speak English (well, the text is English, but in universe she's speaking whatever language the Hisuians speak), much to Zisu's shock. The device she fixed was a universal translator and she's so glad that she can finally explain herself she doesn't have to keep producing those terrible drawings with her embarrassing lack of art skills.

And with that, the truth finally comes out and the mystery is solved. Hijiki explains that she's from another dimension called Ultra Megalopolis and she and her Poipole fell into this dimension through an Ultra Wormhole. She lost most of her memories and woke up scared and alone in the Obsidian Fields, having no idea where she was. When she spotted civilisation, she tried to get help but because of her appearance and the language barrier, she got chased off and fled for her life into the Necro Forest. Because of how badly the first contact went, she assumed that the inhabitants of this world were extremely hostile, (hence why she attacked them on site) so she created a shelter for herself inside a cave to hide from them.

She then explains that there is no natural light in her world, so it was impossible for her to travel outside of the cave during the day because she got blinded and burned by the harsh sunlight. All she has is the clothes on her back and a few gadgets and tools that were in her backpack, so in order to survive she had no choice but to ambush passing merchants venture into Jubilife Village at night when it was dark and where no one could see her so she could steal supplies for herself.

She's very sorry that she had to steal from the Ginkgo Guild because stealing is a crime in her world as well. She didn't mean to scare anyone and she really wishes she didn't have to live in the wild anymore but she's too afraid of being attacked by the villagers again to try to ask for help.

Zisu is very shocked and saddened by Hijiki's story, and after a few moments be asks her if she wants her to escort her back to Jubilife Village. Hijiki doesn't want to because she'll get attacked, but then Zisu says "No you won't! I'm the Captain of the Security Corps. Everyone trusts me to keep the village safe, so if I say that something is not a threat, they'll listen to what o have to say, so I'll clear up the misunderstanding for you!"

Hijiki is still sceptical. She finds it hard to believe that the villagers will accept her just like that, so Zisu sighs and says "Maybe we should report to Commander Kamado about the situation, and give the village a heads up first?" 

Hijiki thinks that's fair enough. She's willing to wait in her cave for the Akari and Zisu to come back for her.

Current objective: Report back to Captain Kamado!

Zisu and Akari have a meeting with Ginter, and Commander Kamado to discuss their findings. Firstly Zisu reassures Kamado that there's no threat to the village. The witch of the woods was really a faller from another world like Akari and Warden Ingo and one of the Pearl Clan's Wardens. She was driven to stealing for survival after the villagers attacked her and drove her away even though she was lost and confused, and most likely in pain from the suburns.

Kamado is incredulous when Zisu tries to argue that they should take her in. Kamado is against inviting Hijiki to stay in the village. Akari is already on thin ice about being allowed to stay and the villagers only tolerate her because she's been busy quelling the frenzied nobles and slowly earning their trust. To invite someone who's KNOWN TO BE A WITCH would be disastrous. Zisu insists that Hijiki isn't magical, she just has some gizmos from her world that haven't been invented in this world so they only seem like magic. She tries bringing up the Pokéball, it looks like magic too but it's really just an ordinary object.

But Kamado is firm in his decision, even if Hijiki does have technology that seems like magic, what if she were to use her technology against the village? And some of the most superstitious villagers wouldn't accept that she's not dangerous and would still consider her to be a bad omen. Letting Hijiki stay would be too much of a risk.

Zisu is worried and disappointed. Even though she was one of the people who was terrified of the forest witch, now that she's discovered that she's actually an innocent person who's suffering hard, she feels absolutely horrible that they can't do anything help her. Zisu decides that they should at least head back to Hijiki's shelter and tell her what Kamado said. Maybe they could formulate a different plan, maybe the Diamond Clan or Pearl Clan could take her in instead?

Akari and Zisu return to the shelter to find it completely ransacked and Hijiki is nowhere to be found. Zisu finds a ransom note among the rocks. Turns out that the Miss Fortune Sisters had been spying on them ever since they bumped into them. After they found out that Hijiki wasn't really a witch, they wanted to take revenge on her for attacking Coin, so they kidnapped her and stole all her technology. Seeing an opportunity to spite Akari as well, they wrote on the ransom note that they took Hijiki further north to the Alabaster Icelands. If she wants to get Hijiki back she has to go the ice caverns in the Bonechill Wastes.

Zisu is outraged, but warns Akari that it's most definitely a trap. The Miss Fortune Sisters are most likely using Hijiki as bait to lure her into an ambush far away from where she can get help, and they're probably intending to leave her to die in the frozen wastes. But Akari wants to go save Hijiki anyway so Zisu decides to head back to the village to rally some of the Security Corps as backup and tells Akari that she'll meet her in the Icelands.

Current objective: Chase after the Miss Fortune Sisters!

Meanwhile, Hijiki has been thrown into the the ice pit in the Bonechill Wastes and the Miss Fortune Sisters are currently occupied. Clover is whining about how cold it is as Charm and Coin go through Hijiki's belongings.

She had things like her taser, an aura scanner, a GPS, an Ultra Smartphone etc but they can't figure out how any of them work or what they're used for. Clover is whining about all the effort they put in ended up being for nothing because everything "the witch" has is useless junk, but Charm snaps at her. At least they might be able to sell this overworldly technology on the black market after all. Coin isn't convinced. Who would buy useless garbage that don't work?

Coin starts threatening Hijiki into telling them how to use her gadgets, or else she'll sicc Toxicroak on her, but there's just a slight hiccup. Hijiki is unable to understand what they're saying because they took her translator away so all she does is stare blankly at them. All three of them are oblivious to the fact that Hijiki can't speak Hisuian at all, and that they all sound like nothing but enraged gibberish to her.

All this really does is piss them off. Clover starts yelling at her again, just completely exasperated and baffled. She's literally being held captive by bandits and tossed into an ice pit, probably freezing to death. How could she possibly feel so blasé about it????? Does she not realise the situation she's in right now??? Coin has had enough and decides to let Toxicroak attack Hijiki anyway. If they can't get any use out of her things, at least she'll be able to get payback for the "lightning strike"

At that moment, Akari shows up just in time. The Miss Fortune Sisters do their motto and start evil motive-ing about how THIS TIME for sure they'll win against Akari and leave her to perish in the ice forever. This time they're going to attack her with all three of their Pokémon at once instead of one at a time like the last few fights and overwhelm her with numbers.

Charm and Clover release their Pokémon and instead of joining in, Coin decides to sit it out. She tells the other two that she's still going to attack the witch with Toxicroak and that they could stall Akari long enough to let Toxicroak get enough hits in. Charm and Clover start arguing with her because that was NOT the plan, but Coin just tells them to shut up.

Charm and Clover go 3 Vs 1 as Toxicroak attacks Hijiki, with Charm substituting Toxicroak with her Rhydon. Akari beats them because of Main Character Plot Armour and Charm goes full villainous breakdown and just decides to attack Akari herself, but then out of nowhere, Hijiki's Poipole breaks out of it's Pokéball and glues the Bandits to a rock. Akari jumps down the ice pit to save Hijiki and you end up battling Toxicroak with Poipole instead of your Pokémon.

With the bandits finally defeated for good, the Security Corps show up to apprehend them. Akari stays with Hijiki who's in a really rough shape. She tried to avoid Toxicroak for as long as she could, but it eventually weared her down, and now she's lying unconscious at the bottom of the pit. Zisu immediately orders the two Medical Corps people to take Hijiki back to the village to get her medical attention. The medics are like "You want us to WHAT-" because that would involve taking THE WITCH TO THE VILLAGE, but Zisu yells at them again and they have no choice but to do what she says.

A day later

Scene transition to a day later and Akari is waiting in Kamado's office. There was quite a uproar in the village when the Security Corps returned with the famous Miss Fortune Sisters somehow stuck to a rock and near mass panic occured when the Med Corps rushed the rumoured witch of the woods to the hospital room in the Galactic Building. Professor Laventon runs in, very upset. He can't get any work done with the noise of that many people crowded around the entrance trying to catch a glimpse of the witch to see if she's really as terrifying as people say she is. Kamado informs him that he already sent Cyllene to get them to leave.

Pesselle arrives from the hospital room to give them an update on Hijiki's condition. They're currently treating her for Toxic poisoning, as well as suburns and eye damage. Pesselle is clearly shaken and explains that she's never seen anyone like Hijiki in her life, she's not even sure that she's human. For starters, her eyes are extremely unnatural looking and she's so deathly pale that her skin looks pale blue. Not to mention that she appears to have bioluminescent eyes and freckles.

She's willing to take Zisu's word that Hijiki is still a normal human from another world, but she wonders what kind of world would have people who are so obviously weakened by sunlight. Kamado thanks her for her help and Pesselle returns to her duties, not before telling her to bring this supposed witch to his office once she's recovered enough.

Professor Laventon talks to Akari about the strange purple Pokémon that was following Hijiki around because he's having trouble identifying what it is. Rei speculates that if the witch is from another world, then maybe the purple Pokémon is too. Laventon nearly explodes with excitement because they have the chance to document a Pokémon from another world! Maybe he could ask the witch if he could have a look at it, which is something he immediately goes to do. Rei runs after him in a panic.

Zisu enters with Ginter. Ginter confirms that they managed to get back some of the things Hijiki stole from the Ginkgo Guild, though obviously things like food couldn't be recovered. Zisu asks if he wants to press any charges, and Ginter considers for a moment before ultimately deciding not to. From the sound of things, Hijiki went through a lot and he would feel terrible if he added to her suffering. Zisu regretfully tells them that the Miss Fortune Sisters got away. After they were freed from the glue, they used a smoke bomb and escaped in the confusion, though she thinks that hopefully the bandits would think twice about confronting Akari again.

A while later, Pesselle brings Hijiki up to Kamado's office and the poor woman is shaking like a leaf, half from because she's still weak and the other half because she's obviously terrified of Kamado. In a scene echoing Akari's first meeting with Kamado, he stares Hijiki down and she loses her nerve instantly, backing away and hiding behind Akari. Pesselle scolds Kamado because this is clearly no way to treat a patient, but he reminds her that this is an outsider he's dealing with, and he must test her by having her face him in combat like he did with Akari.

Hijiki stammers and tries to say that she has no idea how to do that "creature combat thing" that Akari and the bandits did and Kamado clarifies by saying he meant PHYSICAL combat, not a Pokémon battle. Hijiki freaks out because she'd just die if she did that. Kamado retaliates by saying that surely someone who is capable of survived in the wilds and ambushing Ginkgo merchants MUST be able to fight, and if she wants to prove herself, she has to.

Hijiki takes a deep breath and just edges close to him, hesitating to even touch him AAAAAND Kamado throws her. Cut to black with a CRASH! text box and fade back in to see Hijiki flat out unconscious on the floor again. Cue Pesselle totally ripping him a new one, yelling at him about how that was totally unnecessary, why does he always have to do this, has he no shame, as text box after text box hits the screen going by too fast for the player to read.

Zisu helps Hijiki to her feet but she's distressed because Kamado managed to dislodge her translator from her belt so she doesn't understand him when he says that someone so cowardly and unwilling to fight clearly isn't a threat to anyone. Hijiki quickly retrieves her device and turns back to Kamado, saying

Hijiki: "I'm very sorry, my translator fell off. I don't speak in whatever language this is so I couldn't understand any of that. Could you please repeat what you said, sir?"

Zisu: "He said that someone so cowardly and unwilling to fight clearly isn't a threat to anyone."

Hijiki: "Oh…"

Kamado then says that if she wants to stay in Jubilife Village she has to be able to contribute to society, so what skills does she have? Hijiki thinks for a moment because she can't remember much but she does have a vague idea of what her old job. She remembers that she was probably a Poipole handler which is why she has one with her, and she was one of the people tasked with taking care of them as they were typically adopted as companions or to help with construction because of their glue (kinda a Zookeeper/animal shelter worker kind of deal)

Pesselle speaks up and says that it kind of reminds her of the people who look after the Pokémon in the village's pastures. Kamado turns away, thinking about it. He would half to discuss it with Zisu because that falls under the Security Corps jurisdiction. Zisu barges in like "DID SOMEONE SAY SECURITY CORPS?" at that moment and startles everyone. She's 100% on board with letting Hijiki help at the pastures.

Hijiki interrupts, unfortunately she can't work during the day because the sun is straight up harmful to her so she doesn't know how useful she could be. Zisu turns to her and proposes that she'll give her a lodge in exchange for her services at the pasture on the night shift. They're needing more people who can stay up all anyway.

Hijiki is stunned. They wouldn't really do that for her, would they? One encouraging grin from Zisu is all she needs to accept the offer and become a full fledged member of the Security Corps.

Catching Poipole

Hijiki thanks the player for everything, and as a reward for completing the sidequest, she gives the player her Poipole because she feels that the player would be better at taking care of it in this new world…. If she can catch it that is.

Catching Poipole plays out like a Legendary Pokémon battle like how you catch Enamourus. As in, it flies around attacking you with poison blasts and you have to stun it before you can throw a Pokémon to battle it.

After this, Hijiki just becomes an ordinary NPC that you can talk to near the pastures (though she can only be encountered at night.) Her appearance changes, as she's now in the Security Corps uniform instead of her Ultra Space/ cloak get up.

As a little easter egg, you can have a rematch with her and she battles you with the Pokémon you gave her in the sidequest. She excitedly explains that Zisu taught her how to partake in "creature combat".

Her dialogue is mostly showing amazement at how cool everything is in Hisui and how she really wishes she could go out and investigate everything like the Ultra Recon Squad. She realises that Akari wouldn't know who the Ultra Recon Squad is and she explains that they're basically her world's equivalent of the Galaxy Team.

She's heard of the legends about Hisui from Rei and is just as intrigued by them as he is. Though her main complaint is that Hisui is a little… behind, technological wise. Though she expresses interest in the player's Arc Phone as it seems a little out of place in this world…

Since the quest is available during the post game, she talks about how scared she was when "the sky turned red and green" (aka that part of the game when the Player is banished from the village and the sky distorts. She remarks that thought that the Blinding One had escaped from the Tower and drained Hisui of it's light, but apparently it was something else. She figures she shouldn't worry about it since it's not this century's problem anyway. The Tower isn't predicted to break down for another two hundred years anyway (Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon Necrozma foreshadowing!)

Ultimately she doesn't affect the story in any way and her sidequest is completely optional, but it is required if you want to be able to catch Ultra Beasts.

Sidequest: ??? The Beasts from Beyond

To trigger the next quest, you have to enter a Space-time Distortion. The next day, Melli barges in to the Galaxy Team headquarters demanding to speak to someone, ANYONE. He claims that he was minding his business, in the Coronet Highlands when all of a sudden a pile of bricks just up and attacked him! They completely ruined his day and scared Lord Electrode and he demands that someone does something about it! Nobody takes him seriously and Rei just thinks he's gone nuts.

But the next day, Warden Palina shows up, looking really worried. A strange pure white Tentacruel creature showed up in the Coastlands and has been behaving aggressively towards anything that approaches it, and even the Alphas won't go near it. Cyllene calls Akari into her office because she's been getting continuous reports of strange monsters being sighted across all of Hisui that apparently emerged from the space-time distortions.

Hijiki runs in, and quickly excuses herself for interrupting. She's really panicked because she heard from the villagers that Hisui is being invaded by monsters that sound suspiciously Ultra Beasts. She volunteers to help because they're creatures from her homeworld so at the very least she's familiar with them and knows what to expect if Akari goes out and attempts to catch them.

To learn about where to catch the Ultra Beasts, you have to talk to Hijiki. She's heard rumours of monsters and such from the people who visit the pastures to see the Pokémon and she thinks she knows exactly what the monsters really are. She has dialogue talking about each Ultra Beast and a hint as to where it's found.

"There's a ghostly figure floating around the Deadwood Haunt. I don't know much about spirits but it sounds an awful lot like Nihilego. It would float around like a ghost, I think." (Deadwood Haunt, Cobalt Coastlands)

"I heard from someone in the Pearl Clan that an insect with huge muscles is challenging an Alpha Machamp to a flexing contest…. I don't understand, do Buzzwole normally behave like that…?" (Arena's Approach, Alabaster Icelands)

"There's a Pheromosa going wild in the bog. What terrible luck to fall into a wormhole and end up in a place so muddy. It hates getting dirty." (Scarlet Bog, Crimson Mirelands)

"That rude man can't catch a break. Apparently his Electrode is being bothered by a Xurkitree that's trying to eat it's electricity… " (Moonview Arena, Coronet Highlands)

"I've heard that a Celesteela has taken root near the Floaro Gardens. The soil there must be very fertile. It's a giant creature that blasts off like a rocket and- Wait, have rockets been invented here yet? Never mind." (Floaro Gardens, Obsidian Fieldlands)

"I've heard that a sharp creature that looks like paper has been cutting down trees in the Heartwoods. It's Kartana, I'm certain. That Lord Kleavor must be jealous of it's cutting edge sword techniques…" (The Heartwood, Obsidian Fieldlands)

"Oh, this is absolutely terrible! A huge monster is eating giant lumps of ice and snow in that tundra! Sounds very uncomfortable, chewing ice hurts my teeth… Oh wait, what was I saying? Yes! Guzzlord! You must stop it before it consumes everything in sight!" (Avalugg's Legacy, Alabaster Icelands)

"The creature that's that looks like a pile of bricks in must be Stakataka, I'm certain. Where did that unpleasant man say he encountered it? Must have been near some ruins?" (Celestica Ruins, Coronet Highlands)

"Um… What's a volcano anyway? I've never heard of such a thing… Apparently there's been the sounds of explosions coming from the volcano that's making people worried. I don't think the explosions are coming from the volcano itself, sounds more like a Blacephalon is causing them." (Firespit Island, Cobalt Coastlands)

To get Naganadel, talk to Hijiki. She'll explain that Poipole have been selectively bred to be unable to evolve by themselves. They must be taught a special move that lets them evolve that only experienced handlers know how to teach, because it's stronger form is too wild and dangerous for the average civilian to handle. She's seen Zisu teach Akari's Pokémon new moves and tells Akari that she needs to get Zisu to teach Poipole the move Dragon Pulse.

Other stuff

And that's everything I've got about Hijiki. If you haven't worked it out already, she's the ancestor of Zossie from the Ultra Recon Squad. Ultra Sun and Ultra Moon are kinda my favourite 3DS Pokémon games and there was a time when I was absolutely obsessed with the Ultra Recon Squad and I was so sure that they'd come back as an explanation for being able to catch Ultra Beasts in the post game of future Pokémon games that I felt ROBBED when they never showed up in the Crown Tundra.

So with the dawn of the idea of Hisuian Ancestors, I thought "Wouldn't it be cool if the ancestor of one of the Ultra Recon Squad fell into Hisui and got mistaken for a supernatural creature because the locals thought their technology was magic?" Because of how massively technologically advanced Ultra Megalopolis is, I figured that even if it was 200 years ago, it'd still be way more advanced than Hisui so anyone who fell through a wormhole would be in for a sort of time traveller-esque fish out of water scenario but without the time travel.

Hijiki is Zossie's great great great great great great great great (however many greats that can fit in 200 years) aunt. She can't be Zossie's great great grandmother because the grandmother has to stay in Ultra Megalopolis for Zossie to even exist at all.

The name of Necro Forest has a double meaning. As soon as you walk into it you think "Oh, Necro = Death because of the Ghost Types" but it's also the first foreshadowing that the ancestor is from Ultra Megalopolis. Who stole the light from Ultra Megalopolis? Necrozma.

If you're one of the 47 people who played USUM, you'd remember that the Ultra Recon Squad had to wear full protection against the sun, which Hijiki lacks, hence the sun burns.

Hijiki is scared of Zisu because she's been stealing from the Ginkgo Guild and she recognises that she's part of the village's law enforcement so she was afraid that she came to catch her and punish her for the thefts.

About the whole glowy eyes thing, that's a headcanon I have about how the inhabitants of Ultra Megalopolis have bioluminescent eyes. It's based off official art of the Ultra Recon Squad where Dulse's eyes appear to be glowing in the dark. What is canon is the whole thing where the Ultra Recon Squad has silver irises and pupils that match their hair colour. If you zoom into their concept art you can see it.

I picked the name Hijiki because it has the same seaweed theme naming that the individual members of the Ultra Recon Squad have. The seaweed she's named after has been part of the Japanese diet for centuries. (At least according to Wikipedia.)

But what was that "lightning magic?* It was just an ordinary taser. Hijiki just nonchalantly tased Coin. You can find the taser among Hijiki's other gadgets in the cave

Bonus: my thought process while reading over part of this:

"Ok, so Hijiki jumps Gingko merchants in the woods and mugs robs them. Wait... wasn't Volo a Ginkgo merchant---"

The result:

This post took me two years of procrastination to make-

Update: (2nd November 2024) Somebody made art based on this post so I've decided to add it in

[baconcolacan]

I know Tom had that exclamatory quirk (e.g. Holy Poptarts in a pencil sharpener!!) which, sadly, we have not seen much of in newer eddisodes.

But I think it would be funny if he brought it back at an older age, cause man saying cuss words get boring as you reach a certain age, lets put some ✨panache✨ back into our frustrations