#rather it be too big than too small
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So I went to the wiki page for the henghill Bullet & Brain mission of 2.2 looking for some dialogue I had missed and
a) I found something incredibly tasty that slotted into some other thoughts I'd been having, more on that on another day, and
b) I saw this super fun little trivia at the bottom, which!
I knew Penacony characters like Boothill took a lot of inspirations from old movies, but I didn't realize it was even in his and Dan Heng's relationship, that's so cool!!
It fits them very well, it's such a fun reference. "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid" was an old buddy Western film (from 1969- nice) about a pair of outlaws. Butch Cassidy was the leader of a gang, and described as clever, affable, and talkative. Meanwhile, his closest companion, the Sundance Kid, was known as a man of few words.
Cassidy's original birth name was much more plain, but similar to Boothill, he took on a new moniker when he became an outlaw. "Cassidy" had been the last name of his beloved mentor, who taught him how to shoot and ride. And Sundance Kid was known as he was because Sundance was the name of his hometown, and it was the only place that had ever managed to catch and jail him, back when he'd been younger (also similar to Dan Heng, but ouch).
These two stick together like glue throughout the length of the film- through Cassidy's leadership of the gang being challenged, through a train robbery gone wrong, through being pursued by mercenaries, and even through fleeing to Bolivia and trying to start over together.
I don't want to say too much more, since the mission title is referencing one specific movie that I've never seen. I kinda wanna watch it now, though, just to see the inspiration that went into Boothill and Dan Heng and how they get along. I just think it's really sweet that these two were literally made to be the best of bros, how lovely is that. 💕
#honkai star rail#this can be ship or plantonic tbh yall are always free to tag my ramblings as you please haha#just! they're so sweet!!#FWENDS#i would love to see more of them being a dynamic duo further down the line ♡#i think the film moved things along a little quicker but the real life Cassidy and Sundance were actually in south america for a few years#they fled there to get away from pursuers along with Sundance's girlfriend Etta Place.#supposedly they managed to buy a small ranch and the three of them lived peacefully (and even lawfully!) together for like three years-#-until the law caught up with them again#at some point Etta Place returned to the US reportedly due to illness rather than not wanting to get caught like in the film#Sundance may or may not have escorted her back. but whether he did or not he returned to South America with Cassidy#the two of them eventually got into a huge firefight with authorities where Sundance was fatally shot and Cassidy chose to end his own life#that's the most common story anyway. some also say Cassidy snuck back into the US again where he lived quietly until his death.#but it reads kind of like rumors of Elvis Presley sightings to me BSMZKNSKS#the film ended much more happily with the two of them getting into shenanigans and a freeze frame of them in a hail of bullets haha#i wanna see Dan Heng and Boothill fight together too it would be so cool aaaaaa#they would be great at getting into shenanigans! as we've already seen!!#fun bonus info: Boothill's ult literally puts black bars at the top and bottom of the screen to look like a widescreen Western movie#fun bonus info 2: Cassidy was regarded with respect by some people bc he never stole from the poor he only robbed big companies#this is actually nicer than Boothill is in canon bc he openly admits he will rob someone blind if he doesn't like them BSKZKKZMSKDK#(although I feel like its implied he has more standards for this than he gives himself credit for.#like he makes it pretty clear he doesn't particularly like Argenti at first and thinks he's annoying as shit but I'm sure he didn't rob him#...would have been real fucking funny if he did though oh my god I would love to see him try that. it absolutely would not work BSKZKNSKSJS#hsr#henghill#bootheng#dan heng#boothill#hsr boothill#hsr dan heng
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i just want to put them in the same room and see what happens
#i think bart would call him a pussy but they would both eventually realize#they have some of the same issues and the self-awareness sucks so bad they never speak again#transmission.png#benny#my fanart#numbuh 52 pickup#or bart humiliates him extensively and it's like that modern episode#where martin was like ''bart you're only nice to me when no one's around. you are worse than a bully. you're a COWARD and a CONFORMIST'#benny is a coward and conformist in some ways but he'd rather die than do most of the stuff bart does in general#though benny def likes fictional pranksters like bart cuz they're not real and they're Sooo Cool#bart can't be an actual rebel right and benny can't fit the prankster boy mold because his heart is too big / he's too emotionally aware#it's like trying to be a professional clown but your makeup sucks really bad and your clown shoes are too small#and everyone's like yeah you did the routine good but your presentation was lacking
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Anyway they can change between being tiny and human sized. And when they're tinier they can only be seen by the other fae or their selected humans. So if you just passed Noll on the street while Shavuli was perched on his shoulder chatting away you wouldn't see or hear her.
#my characters#a lot of the fae who are trying to get noll to pick a human take turns joining him as he wanders if he opts to be human sized#if he opts to be small and fly around none of them can actually find him to follow bc he does it precisely to be alone#and makes careful to avoid all of them when he dips#which furthers their friendly obsession with him being their void like where is he we lost him we gotta go bring him back from the abyss!#and hes just off on his own being crippled by anxiety at being a disappointment bc what if he isnt fun enough#absolutely unaware that all his friends are like we gotta go find him hes too good at this#hes going to win the game we have clearly set up to involve humans before he even recruits a human#cause he is TOO GOOD at slipping away ITS NOT FAIR we love him what a weird fae thats our lil guy!#noll really is just out there impressing all of his friends and not knowing hes impressing them bc hes too scared of being abandoned#and i was telling rae but when he does find the human he wants as his for the game#hes like ok so im gonna be honest here i turn into a big sword and you are definitely not going to be strong enough to carry me#and the human just like ok then pick someone else?#and hes like no no i cant you dont get it youre resourceful and im resourceful THEREFORE! i have an idea! just for us!#and then proceeds to shatter himself into shards basically#so that the human can have many smaller easy to control swords rather than one too big sword#and when all of the other fae see it they are absolutely delighted bc they didnt know he could do that! thats so cool! wow! they love him s#and he doesnt tell them that it actually really flippin hurts and being broken is agonizing but he wants to win so badly#anyway hello appreciate the void fae noll and his lil buddy shavuli who can turn into a spear C:#in her human form though she loves to wear hoodies instead of just like .... a skin tight suit with draping fabrics#she does wear biker shorts bc leggy.... she likes to have legs free#but she likes hoodies a lot
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hehehe
#i want to add a hood to it but the likelihood of me being able to follow through is SLIM!#photo record#i hope it's good. i can't return it.#it might be big on me but i'd rather it be too big than too small#chatpost
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watching a brutal horror movie but my neighbor has resumed stomping around in what I imagine to be shoes made of bricks so I can no longer empathize with the victim and instead im forced to imagine brutal torture carried out by yours truly
#im saying resumed bc at this point its more like there's always Thud Thud Thud with little pauses rather than the opposite#it drives me insane to an embarrassing extent#when will science discover the option to turn my goddamn hearing off this is literally the biggest dream in my life#if i was rich id fund research for this#i mean it#noise cancelling headphones my bestest friends. unforch my head is stupidly small and all headphones are slightly too big which is great for#when you're already in an irrationally pissy mood#justice for peanut sized brain people when .#misophonia representation. thats what i provide to this community#funfact about me is thinking about how sounds make me aggressive makes me think about my father which makes me more aggressive#bc he's the type of person to say “oh IM SO SORRY SHOULD I SHUT UP SHOULD I STOP BREATHING SHOULD I FUCKING KILL MYSELF HUH”#if you say like. anything to him. anything at all#this is why i love internet guilt tripping trends btw bc my automatic response is like yeah please do kill yourself thanks#wtf am i talking about rn. i forgot what the post is about. as usual. welcome to my diary
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I mean, I have to ask about Dorothy, Blanche and Rose for that names/number game 😅 as for the numbers, I’ll go for 5 and 6!
Yay, thanks for the ask! OK here we go!
5. go on a six hour road trip with (no car radio, you choose who drives), sit next to on a six hour plane flight, sit across from on a six hour train journey
I hate travelling so this is hard. Like I literally take 3 ear options (wireless earbuds, wired earbuds and loop earplugs) just to keep me calm and not overwhelmed. I've only flown twice, but I do love a wee train trip...as long as I have something in my ears.
OK, Dorothy and I in the car. I can't drive so she would have to do that. I think that would work out OK. We could probably sing show tunes or analyse a good poet together. (I'd be raving about Carol Ann Duffy, let's be honest).
There is no way you could get me in an airport. Even in a hypothetical, I just wouldn't go near an airport. So, I guess private plane with Blanche. She comes from old money, right? That could work. She could afford that.
Rose and I are on the train but also I would be in my own world. Probably writing or reading. At some point she'd ask about my tangle fidget and I'd reluctantly speak with her because she's got a kind face.
6. go clothes shopping with, go to ikea with, go grocery shopping with
Dorothy and I are going clothes shopping together. That's easy, I think we have the most comparable styles.
Blanche and I would go to Ikea. I've only been twice but I think Rose would get too distracted then again it does have a lot of mirrors so maybe not perfect.
Rose and I would go grocery shopping instead. In this hypothetical, I'm taking her to Lidl and showing her the bakery section and the middle aisle because I think she'd love to be able to buy cheesecake brownies and then also a painting set.
#im sorry if the first one is too literal but also the hypothetical has to have me in it#and i would rather spend big money to take a train than go to an airport#thankfully the uk is small so thats a viable option#this was fun to think about#the golden girls#dorothy zbornak#blanche devereaux#rose nylund#fmk but pg
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Fattytober day 11 - Bathtub, day 12 - Distribution, day 13 - Theater, day 14 - Legs and day 15 - Floating.
#spamtum#bîg's art#wg#weight gain sequence#fattytober#I'm getting burnt out a little so I'll just take a small 'break'- in the sense that I'll just work on other things#a little before my motivation goes away. And said things are seasonnal too so I want to work on them now.#I'll resume fattytober afterwards which will be soon enough.#In any case he's getting real big... Bigger than I'm used to but that's why I did this challenge (besides thirst).#To practice outside my comfort zone. We're halfway there and he's huge so he'll definitely reach immobility levels#and I'll tag it appropriately when the time comes in case you're not into that. But for now he can still walk... Or waddle rather.
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All these new fic for the reverse bangs and im sitting here like Man I'd love to read these. I got naruto, though. 🫡 I'll get to them eventually
#speculation nation#and what time im.not spending on naruto im spending writing#or uh. getting my blood drawn. 10 of them. 10 whole blood.#real talk that fucked me up actually. like i talked big to the nurse like 'oh ive donated blood before i'll be fine'#but what i failed to think about was the fact that donating blood also fucked me up#im a small person with a sensitive constitution. my body dont like it.#so i was out of commission for a day and well now im uh. i dont even know. ive been crocheting today.#trying to write bc im on a strict deadline 💀💀💀💀 i will make it. i will. im determined to.#school starts in a week tho Augh and i have psychological testing (4 HOURS) AND my dentist appointment on the SAME. DAY.#tuesday babeyyy whatup. it's gonna suck.#tomorrow i have to shower and do laundry. at the minimum. bcus then theres tuesday and THEN i have a haircut on wednesday#getting my side shave yessssir. going to an actual place rather than just greatclips again . lol.#ummmmm all that considered i might request to not have a driving thing this week. too much shit to do.#wahh wahhh so many appointments. and i am NOT going to get a good grade in flossing.#why didnt i start flossing sooner than this. at least it doesnt hurt as much as it did yesterday. i still wont be ready in time tho.#oh well tomorrow i have to be productive. i need to watch less naruto. no not even with itachi and sasuke fight. not even then.#im just gonna lie down in. the dirt now.
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comic planning/roughs on the clock at work 👍 ok. this one's still a few posts out though
#god i really do just need to get a tablet or. something#some way to draw digitally on the go bc my laptop is um#at least 200% less portable than your typical old clunky laptop. its a whole ordeal#and as u can see tradish scribbles are barely usable#though i guess it would help if i ever remembered to grab something besides a shite pen at work lmao <-hates pen forever#mad bc i think this one is kind of mid+redundant for what i'd intended it to do bc of how some of the previous ones shifted#but i still gotta draw it bc one of the later ones uses it. buh#when i said these werent chronological or connected btw i lied#though only VERY VERY LOOSELY so. enough to bother *me* if i don't do them in order#but not enough that's really going to be noticeable to anyone else. they're each still intended 99% as standalone.#the arc is very minor but its there. for me. for anyone else it probably just amounts to a couple easter egg references/ consistencies#by the by the pizzaposts before this arent part of the series.#one small quickie thing and one i would...really like to get done sooner rather than later bc i need it out of my system#former's like 70% sketched im just waffling on execution#latter is uh...theres a lot there but it's harder to work on And harder tell how close to done it is.#unrelated its funny how i Always forget brick until i start putting anything down and then its like oh god yeah i can do bg Jokes with him#funny in the sense that one of my webcomic protag oc's is a...spatially similar deal as him [little kid with a big bear companion]#and i ALWAYS forget the bear when im scripting it. until i start messing with the layout and its like fuck theres a bear.#i have to do things with this now. fortunately thus far it hasn't been too hard to adapt#much rambling tonight goodbye. i haev to go block all these damn bots
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going to joann to get more fabric tomorrow to try making my dress again SIGH the pattern i used was the medium size but the bodice barely fit after i got the bust panels sewn together so i don't know if i should do the large or extra large pattern this time 😑
#i wear a medium for most of my clothes and if i went by my specific measurements i should've done the small pattern but i didn't trust it#so i did a size up and it STILL didn't fit so idk if large will fit either and i should just say fuck it and do the extra large#i don't want to sew this shit a third time and i'd rather it be too big than unwearable#talkin
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you know at the end of the day today i was chatting w some other paras. i was a special ed para for a seventh grader today that's what i did. and the last block for them is just learning center and it's chill and it's friday and some of the kids were making pizza and no one was really doing anything or stressed or bothered so the kids and the adults just have various little shooting-the-breeze sessions although im usually not that active in these bc Im Shy, And A Substitute so i feel very out of place a lot of the time. but anyway i had never really talked much w either of the paras i was with today and we struck up a conversation about some stuff and one of them says to me "you know just so you know i LOVE your hair" and she turns to the other para and she's like "isnt it gorgeous? dont you love her hair?"
and i kinda blushed and said thank you a couple of times and looked down bc that's what i do when i receive a sincere-sounding compliment unexpectedly. and then i chatted a little more before i kinda drifted out of the conversation and opened my book and after a page or two one of them asked me about what i was reading (it's Song of the Cell: An Exploration of Medicine and the New Human by Siddhartha Mukherjee if you were wondering and i started it a few days ago). so i told them a bit about it and started chatting again on the topic of reading and i guess i was just naturally smiling and the same one who complimented my hair said "look at those dimples. i just can't w you"
#made me wanna cry a little. i was like thank u mom#felt beautiful at work. who do i tell this to?#tales from diana#i have never had my dimples complimented not to my memory at least#i kinda forget i have them bc i don't. i don't like. smile naturally and get a good view of them when i look in the mirror#i dont think they show up when i dont smile candidly either? unless im forced-smiling really hard#yeah idrk what they look like i guess#i received both of these compliments with a little bit of an 'oh shucks' (blushes) attitude#i have to say. it's not that i don't get complimented on my appearance. but most of the time it doesn't sound... don't wanna say 'sincere'#it doesn't feel like. FELT. as a compliment. a lot of the time#like sometimes it feels like courtesy. and other times. it feels like#someone will mention to me that im like young and pretty but theyll say it in a 'but im not impressed' tone which is really#odd bc. it's not like i asked?#it's like in a small way it's to 'put me in my place' or address some elephant in the room#like it's an annoyance to them rather than an expression of. you know. admiration#not that i need to be admired for my appearance but that's what i mean. like it felt nice#like a lot of the time ppl will tell me im pretty it sounds either like flattery or like some kind of weird anti-flattery#they're trying to give me a big head or they assume it's already big and they wanna deflate it#yeah that was nice tho. i talked w one of those paras for a pretty long time abt art and photography#she has a children's book coming out soon too and it sounded so interesting. i liked her a lot#i also like the kid i worked w today. i had been w her before but not in like 6 months. she's a sweetie
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did not get a chance to write at all today even though my job usually has at least some downtime at some point and i feel too tired to do anything besides play around with what I already have…..but also thinking wow why do i still think writing everyday = some kind of pillar of consistency i should strive to when im trying to have a plentiful writing month. when the hottest kind of consistency in art is the type you let adapt to ur circumstances…..like me scheduling break days around my work schedule and writing days around my days off IS consistency !!!! consistency is not just how consistent you write but also how consistent you are with meaningful rest i think……
#i would LOVE to be a write everyday girlie but even w a job that has a lot of downtime#it’s unpredictable and most days even if I could I just don’t want to like. I can’t get into the headspace easily!#today I just wanted to watch YouTube on my downtime and play acnh like okay go girl#I think I would rather fill my downtime at work with reading rather than writing though#cause I don’t have my laptop and whilst im a big fan of notes app drafting it has to be a specific vibe#like I don’t feel like I can work on chapter 2 on my phone rn I need to be in the doc!! on the computer bc the doc too small in my phone
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my gappy cosplay might be coming in today or tomorrow and I’m so scared I’ll look like shit 😭
#reviews were positive but they did say it ran a little big#but like hell I was gonna buy a S bc I’d rather risk it being too big than too small
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i ordered an item from the transtape website and they accidentally mailed me the wrong size so i reached out like hey, hi, do you want this back perhaps, and they not only told me to keep it they refunded me fully,,,,,,,,,,, i basically got the thing for free,,,,,,,,, do these people happen to have a tip jar anywhere cause i feel bad and i want to give them money so they can continue to make transtape jiuhgfcdxsdef
#its genuinely been so good for me#dont get me wrong i love my underworks compression shirts but its just too hot here to wear layers like that :[#so i use the tape instead because it's not as stifling and i can wear it for days and days#i feel so bad i only emailed because if i could send it back and let someone else use it id rather do that......#i ordered a small and got a large is why id want to send it back i know the men with big naturals need that shit more than i with my b cups
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where do you find people to talk to online who don't suck, asking for a friend
#jasper.txt#<- guy who is in Too Damn Many discord servers#but they're all too big!!!#i had to leave a server that i was slowly dipping my toes into talking to because there were some very uncomfortable dynamics going on ther#that reminded me of the Trauma#but it was small and cozy and that's why i felt comfortable trying to talk there!!#and trying to filter places for basic criteria like “hey are you cool about trans people” is exhausting#because so many times itll be totally innocuous and then surprise! nazi meme posted in general#OR if its not that then it'll be queer friendly but it's all 'no bad vibes!!! no negativity ever!!!''#incredibly stifling#hate it#its not like i dont have close friends but they like to hang in voicechats rather than talk over text much#and i want to fulfill that text based communication need... i wanna chat with people while im at work...#sighhh. shit sucks dog#actually coming back to this#i totally forgot i got invited to a server by an ex mutual a while back#and then had to leave when they started saying nasty shit about ace people on main#so add 'queer but they hit you with the exclusionism jumpscare' to that list
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i think. when jesper does get skilled enough to reform and reshape things around them.. it takes a bit for them to be able to show it to folks. jesper is very aware of her lack of training, and the things she makes are not at all perfectly done, and she prickles a lot at the concept of rejection or someone insulting her work. and when she DOES show her work, she tries to assert it in the most casual way possible and not make a huge deal out of it so it’s not drawn to attention but. i think one of the best things for them in terms of their mindset is people complimenting/being in awe about their work but not putting the focus hugely on it
#for the most subtle things too. rather than utilizing their powers only as smth to be used#breaking down the part of their brain that thinks it a curse and showing how it can be wonderful… even for the small things#i do think jesper does start w rlly small things! Like drawing stains out of things or bleaching color but. sits here weeping abt#jesper doing smth Big fabrikating wise and ppl being so delighted by it…#the softest goddamn thing jesper can do w their powers is make flowers bloom and i think abt that a lot#not everybody can aim. / headcanons.
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