#rambled so MUCH. sorry. but if you understand you understand

[pnutbutter-n-j-elyy]

Cross My Heart, I Didn't Love You

Bangchan x Gn!Reader

<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3

The words left his mouth too easily. Too quickly. Too carelessly.

"I don’t feel that way about you."

There wasn’t a hesitation, not even a pause to consider the weight of what he was saying.

It was final.

A death sentence to the hope that had been blooming inside of you for years.

You knew you shouldn't have confessed. You knew, but knowing didn't stop the ache spreading through your chest like a wildfire you couldn't put out.

It took you a moment before you could swallow. Hard. "Oh."

Just that. Oh.

What else could you say?

You thought you'd cry, thought the ground would crack open and swallow you whole, but all you could do was stare at him.

At the face you had loved for so long.

The eyes that held galaxies but not you.

The lips that had spoken so softly to you, teasing you, laughing with you, making you believe- making you think - that maybe, just maybe, you had a chance.

Chan shifted on his feet, rubbing the back of his neck. "I-I'm sorry. I didn’t mean to-"

"You did," you cut in. Your voice was steady surprisingly, even though your world was crumbling. "You meant it. And that's okay. I just...I just needed to hear it."

Chan frowned, looking like he wanted to say something, but what was left to say?

What could he possibly offer you now?

Nothing much, if anything at all.

"We're okay?"

You nodded.

Chan couldn't think of anything so he blurted the first thing that came to his mind.

"Cross your heart?"

"And hope to die." You mumbled quietly, biting back the tears at the truth in those childish words.

You wanted to be swallowed whole. You felt humiliated.

But Chan couldn't do anything about that.

And you knew that.

So you did the only thing you could do.

You smiled. Forced. Hollow.

"It’s getting late. I should go."

He didn’t stop you. Didn’t reach for your hand or ask you to stay.

And that was how you knew.

There had never been anything to hold onto in the first place.

You didn’t cry until you were alone in your apartment, in the suffocating silence of a place that suddenly felt too big and too empty.

You had spent years orbiting around him, letting him be the gravity that pulled you in, and now- now there was nothing.

Just a vast, aching void where something warm used to be.

Your fingers trembled as you reached for your phone, for the thread of messages filled with inside jokes, late-night ramblings, voice notes of him humming random melodies he was working on. You stared at his contact name, thumb hovering over the chat before you pressed down.

You’re still my best friend, right?

You deleted it before you could send it.

Because you already knew the answer he was going to give.

And a part of you realized that the answer he would have given, would just mess up your equation.

Chan...didn’t think much of it at first.

The confession, the way you left-

It was awkward, sure, but he figured things would go back to normal.

You were strong. Resilient.

You had always been able to brush things off, so he convinced himself you’d bounce back and your friendship would be back to normal.

But then you didn’t.

The next day, you didn’t reply to his texts.

The next week, you were suddenly "too busy" to hang out.

The next month, you started pulling away, and Chan- idiot that he was- thought it was just temporary.

That you just needed space.

Then came the excuses. The half-hearted responses. The messages left on read.

And for the first time, he started to feel something close to regret.

It hit him during one of the late nights at the studio, the kind of night where exhaustion blurred the edges of his thoughts, making everything feel heavier.

He had just finished mixing a track when he caught himself opening his phone, out of habit, scrolling to your contact.

He paused. The last message was weeks ago.

Hope you're doing okay. We should hang out soon. Miss you.

Unread.

Chan sighed, rubbing his hands down his face. He didn’t understand it. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. You two were supposed to laugh it off, move past it.

You two were supposed to still be us.

But you weren’t.

And he was starting to realize maybe that was his fault.

Maybe if I had tried explaining instead of just leaving Y/N to handle my rejection on their own...

He let himself fall back into his chair, staring at the ceiling.

A sick feeling settled in his stomach, twisting, tightening, but he shoved it down. He wasn’t sure why this was bothering him so much. You were his best friend. You had always been there, always been his safe place. He didn’t need you to love him like that. Why would you want someone like him to love you like that?

And why did the thought of you not loving him at all suddenly make it hard to breathe?

You forced yourself to move on. Or at least, you tried to.

It wasn’t easy. Not when everything reminded you of him. The coffee shop where you two used to sit for hours, him hunched over his laptop while you doodled on napkins.

The convenience store where he’d grab extra snacks just because he knew you’d steal half of his. The stupid, little things you hadn’t realized were stitched so deeply into your life until they were gone.

Until he was gone.

But what choice did you have? Staying in his orbit was only going to break you further, so you cut yourself free. It was the hardest thing you had ever done.

But it was also the only way you could survive.

Months passed.

Chan told himself he was fine. That you were fine.

But then, one night, he saw you.

Not through a screen. Not in passing. But there, across the room at a mutual friend’s gathering, looking different and yet exactly the same. Except this time- this time you weren't looking for him.

You weren't making a beeline to his side like you used to.

Instead, you were laughing at something someone else had said, eyes bright, lips curved into a smile that he used to think belonged to him.

And suddenly, he wasn’t fine.

He wasn't fine at all.

Because he realized, too late, that he had been wrong.

He did feel that way about you.

He had just been too blind to see it.

And now? Now you were gone.

Chan sucked in a sharp breath, his fingers tightening around his drink as he watched you from across the room. He thought about going over, thought about what he could possibly say.

"Hey, remember when I said I didn’t love you? I think I lied."

He laughed bitterly to himself. Too late.

Too late for that.

He had told you he didn’t love you.

Cross his heart, he thought he didn’t.

But if that were true, then why did it feel like he was the one suffocating now?

<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3

@abovenyx @wolfs-archive @oddracha @iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric @panbish-1209 @fxiry-vtt @sseawavee @shuporanporang @amarecerasus @softkisshyunjin @whoa-jo @meanergreener @rikibun @ayyonoona @shinywombatcrusade @y4yayael @skzstan12345 @mariteez @allys-reads @jazziwritesthings @skzstannie @yongbokkiesworld @kkkeopi @neverendingstay @moony-9 @minsungsthirdwheel @everlastingspring143 @joyofbebbanburg @leezanetheofficial @tr-mha-fan @bubbly-moon @night-storm7 @missmajdastark @axel-skz @rockstarkkami @emilyywhyy

<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3x<3

[marshmallowgoop]

Thank you so much for all the support and kind comments on this video!! I really put a lot into this one, and hearing that it resonated with others is very reassuring.

Hope it's not too much of a social faux pas to address multiple threads at once!

From @caliowl333:

OMG @marshmallowgoop this is absolutely STUNNING! I had no idea you were gonna go all out like this! This video is absolutely gorgeous, and you added so many amazing details and special effects! <3 <3 <3 I love how you mixed the manga and anime so smoothly and created amazing collages in the backgrounds with their own effects! My mind is blown! :D That must have taken so long to do! I bow before your incredible editing skills! Also you totally nailed my music taste! XD You're the best! <3 <3 <3 I can't believe you checked out my videos for this! I hope they weren't too boring ^^; I really love how you include a breakdown of your thoughts on your videos! I totally get what you're going for, here, and I thought you did it splendidly! The ideas came through loud and clear! :D I agree totally that Shinichi just straight up enjoys spending time with Heiji, deducing mysteries together and talking about their shared interests as peers. There's definitely more to their relationship than Heiji being one of the few who know Conan is Shinichi! Also, Heiji having to see Shinichi in pain and choosing to put himself in danger for him time and time again… dreamy sigh I just love these two so MUCH! XD Thank you so much for participating in my silly event! You definitely made it extra special for me! Also, I PROMISE if I hold another event to add AMVs to the list of offerings along with fanfics and fanart XD; I hope if I do it again we get lots of videos! :D Thank you, thank you, thank you SO MUCH for my gift! I'm over the moon with it! :D I'm off to watch it another 100+ times :D You're an incredible artist and such a skilled editor! Thank you again for participating and helping make this event so memorable! <3 This sparked, like, CRAZY AMOUNTS OF JOY XDDD <3

First of all, I want to say that I am so relieved that you liked the video!! I've mentioned it in a few reblogs of my AMVs recently (which you always responded so kindly to, thank you!!), and it's touched upon a bit in this post, too, but I've been struggling with editing lately. Technically, I feel like I've made so many strides, and I've been just eager to share what I think are improvements with everyone... but then I do, and embarrassment follows. Just because something is technically impressive doesn't mean it resonates, and I've feared that my videos are becoming more and more unenjoyable to fans of Detective Conan—something I definitely didn't want for an exchange AMV for a Detective Conan fan!

So, receiving such an encouraging, enthusiastic comment after I posted... it was so heartening. Thank you so much.

I also enjoyed watching your AMVs when I was figuring out what I was gonna do for this one!! Banger song choices, and I super appreciate the captioning work you're doing now. AMVs are such a varied art form, and I love seeing how others tackle it; your HeiShin AMVs have been such an inspiration for me. Still in awe of folks who can make AMVs over 2.5 minutes!

I'm really glad the ideas in my video came through! And to be told that my work has rewatchability is such a high compliment! Excited for any future events with videos included from the start, and I'm still very grateful that I was able to participate in this one. Thank you so much!!

From @birdmenmanga:

#THE SCREAM I SCRUMPT......#I didn't notice that you used the JP dub lines until halfway through the conan monologue section and I was like huh??#something's different about this one...#I was like hm it's kinda like a partner piece to the no thoughts just hattori heiji video where it's all heiji saying kudo#and then I realized what you were going for w the fucking cruise episode GOD the drop was INSANEEEE#the audio editing is so good the flawless balancing hitting the beats god. everything about this is insane#I've watched this like 10 times and EVERY time it drops I have to laugh out loud it brings me SO much joy#I think you did such a great job with integrating the effects this time.#I think you're really improving on the front of the compositions!#I didn't even notice the sort of film strips on the side until I watched the comparison and I was like WOW that's such a good solution#to the like. dimensional differences between the old and new versions of the anime#I also noticed you changed the color of heiji's shirt in the like. fashion fits. and that was such a good choice#your color balancing was excellent the whole video was super cohesive in that sense#I also really like the weight of the movement for a lot of the physics#like when the 5 pictures slide up at the end of STAY. the weight on those are really really nice.#you always have THE most spot on Shinichi POV videos it's CRAZY#I know you're not trans goop but I think everything you wrote about really cleanly summarizes why I do often think of Shinichi as trans#like... the other side in the sense of a world after he can come out if that makes sense.#ahhh I really want to make a cool video of them now too...

And from @mirrorfalls:

Some say the Perfect AMV is one that can make manga and anime look like indispensable pieces of each other. This does that. Some say the Perfect AMV is one that can whip between 4:3 and 16:9 clips like the most natural thing in the world. This does that. Some say the Perfect AMV is one that can have official ports, scanlations, and out-and-out raws playing nice. Look no further. (And oh yeah, what feels like all the soul HeiShin has and ever will have distilled into less than two minutes of song. I don't know how you keep doing this but I pray you'll never stop.)

Okay, I really want to see that video you have in mind, Soh!!

But thank you so much, both of you. These are such amazingly nice comments.

Regarding the use of the Japanese dub, I would have loved to edit with the FUNimation English dub, but I know that not everyone loves it as much as I do, and perhaps more significantly, the FUNi dub drastically limits what I'm able to use, given that they only dubbed the first 123 episodes and six films (well, and The Mirapolis Investigation, the Wii game, sort of). Sure, I've somewhat faked a potential FUNi dub for Episode 174 (the cruise ship episode) in a video before by splicing together unrelated voice lines, but I didn't really want to do that here... and I would have had to do that for practically everything in this AMV. Because FUNi only dubbed the lines of Conan asking Heiji if he's okay in Movie 3!

(As a bit of an aside, I did splice a clip from the end of Episode 118 and Episode 174 together, but FUNi actually didn't even dub that because it's from the after-credits scene of Episode 118! Which is actually another thing that got me about this video... I intended to use real VHS or Laserdisc footage for the parts with the film strips, but I just totally ran out of time to digitize my Laserdisc for 118. And I couldn't even use DVD footage for it because my only DVD copy of the episode is FUNi's DVD—and they didn't include the after-credits scene at all, which is what I needed for the video! I had to screw up my Blu-ray footage because I just didn't have anything more low quality on hand. And while it's such a small detail, I am devoted to the bit and still regret I couldn't get that Laserdisc digitized in time. For the next one! But all the other footage used in those sections is real VHS footage!)

All that said: I'm glad the audio mixing hit!! I tried some different techniques with this one (like isolating one of the surround sound channels for the films and Episode 345 to better remove background noise and music (but alas those cicadas lol they were included with the voices for Movie 13 and didn't come out with AI vocal isolation and I just had to add more cicadas because I purposefully cut voice lines in pieces to fit beats and so otherwise there would have been blank spaces without cicadas if I didn't add more)), and I'm super happy it worked out okay!

Regarding the coloring, I've really come to like the coloring method described in this video from L e s h k a n, starting here. I made a few adjustments here; rather than apply the nodes to the clip itself, I applied said nodes to an Adjustment Clip over the entire video. Then, since it ends up a little dark (and this AMV in particular has a lot of night scenes), I created another Adjustment Clip over it, went to Fusion, and added a BrightnessContrast node, where I increased the Lift and Contrast to my liking.

(Guess I forgot to name the second Adjustment Clip "coloring 2" this time, though, whoops!)

While I have to admit that the change in Heiji's shirt color wasn't exactly intentional, I'm glad it helped with the cohesion!

And on that note, regarding the official, non-manga art used in this video, while I'm still working on getting this video up on YouTube with a full source list, YouTube recently revoked my ability to post external links, so I wouldn't even be able properly link these sources anyway. I used the following merchandise artworks:

Heiji and Shinichi

Heiji and Conan

Heiji and Shinichi

Japanese DVD covers from my collection here

And also this Laserdisc cover from my collection:

Regarding the manga, I really contemplated how I was gonna handle it! No official English versions exist for most of the movie manga (but Movies 23 and 25 have translations not from Viz, without the FUNimation dub name changes!), and I wondered if I should just leave movie manga panels (gotten from BookWalker, which is a great place to buy Japanese ebooks without a Japanese address!) raw. I thought it worked okay to leave it raw for the opening, where the words were literally being spoken by the characters, but for the Movie 7 manga later, I edited in the English dialogue myself, using Bilibili's English translation for the film and FUNimation's terminology for the alcohol (though I probably should have used Viz's, in retrospect...), thinking it'd be unfitting to mix Japanese and English panels in the rest of the video. This of course created the question of if I should use "Harley" instead of "Hattori," as seen in some other panels, but ehh, if the movie manga was officially translated in English, it would probably use the Japanese names, lol. Glad to hear it came out fairly cohesive, despite everything!

Regarding the aspect ratios, I usually try to make my videos a consistent 16:9 or 4:3, and anything not natively those ratios will be scaled and cropped to fit. But for this one, I was very inspired by AMVs that deliberately use differing aspect ratios as part of the concept, like katranat's "Here It Goes Again" and Joker Troupe's "Future Nostalgia" MEP, and I decided to give that a try, too! I thought it could also fit with my concept because I think a 4:3 aspect ratio rather represents the past (I've seen it used for flashbacks in 16:9 series), which adds to the idea of the journey to the "other side" being long. But Heiji will stick around no matter how long it takes!

Speaking of long, I know this was all ridiculously long, but tl;dr, thank you so much for all the kind comments!! It means a lot <3

My @heishinvalentineexchange2025 gift for the immensely kind and patient @caliowl333, who graciously allowed me to participate with a video instead of fic or art! (And wrote me a 20,000+-word piece in exchange?! Oh my goodness!)

Song is the SadBois & NIO Remix of "Other Side" by ILLENIUM, featuring Vera Blue, which you can listen to in full here. Ramblings under the cut!

When I first began seriously video editing, I didn't think much about composition or how well clips flowed together—lyric sync was arguably my main goal, and anime pieces were thrown onto the timeline pretty much purely based on that.

Now, I put much more care into the very visual elements—the effects, the match cuts, the dazzle. But in the process, I fear that I'm losing what audiences found engaging about my early videos: the actual ideas.

So, for this AMV, I aimed to put the most effort into a strong concept. The titular "other side" is a world without the Black Organization, where Shinichi can freely be himself. Heiji is waiting for that world, where he no longer has to lie and pat Conan's head and pretend that they're not peers, and Shinichi is dreaming of that world because he's always dreamed of working with somebody just like him. The thought of meeting Heiji someday, when he first learns of his existence (Episode 490), fills Shinichi with excitement. He does a lot on his own, but he also loves working on a team—and doing so, being with people, sharing his enthusiasm with others—is what he wants more than anything.

(Heck, there's even a piece of official art called "Conan's Dream Vacation" where he dreams of playing beach volleyball with Heiji and Ran and Kazuha—as himself.)

Sure, you could argue that Shinichi simply enjoys working with Heiji as Conan because Heiji treats him as he truly is. But the times he spends as Shinichi with Heiji point to the fact that no, he just really likes deducting with Heiji. Eagerness, big smiles—in "The Scarlet School Trip" (Episodes 927-928), involving Heiji in the case of the day takes precedence over solving it himself, as he immediately shares what he knows and even jostles Heiji awake when he learns more, before doing anything else, because there's no way he's going to solve it alone. He doesn't want to.

But as things are, being Shinichi is pain. He takes an antidote, but it's poison. Being Conan is what's become "normal" and "comfortable," but Conan can't be what Shinichi is to Heiji. Conan isn't strong enough to catch Heiji when he's falling. Conan can't save him from bullets. Conan can't even talk to him naturally without hiding and secrets. His dreams have become nightmares.

And it can't be easy for Heiji, either. To see someone you care about suffering. To know that Shinichi is in a dangerous situation—and involving himself in it applies that same danger to himself. It'd make sense for Heiji to walk away and wash his hands of it... but Shinichi really wants him to stay. Despite everything, he wants Heiji to stay. For that someday when they can be true partners "on the other side."

I tried to say other things in here, too. Shinichi cementing himself as a precious person to Heiji by countering his insecurities with a one truth prevails and this isn't a competition and you don't have to prove yourself to me. Heiji finding Shinichi even after becoming Conan because he'll always find Shinichi, no matter what, because he's dreaming of being "on the other side," too (even if he didn't know it initially). Shinichi pushing Heiji away with coldness because maybe it's selfish to want him to stay, maybe it's cruelty to involve him, but he can't deny that he cares, that he wants Heiji with him, that he doesn't want to do this on his own.

And while I maybe still went a little ham on the effects, I do hope my ideas are the strongest of all! "No effects" versus effects comparison can be found here!

Thank you again for all your hard work organizing this event, Cali!!

[velnna]

i’m ngl, i’m a big dnd nerd that was running out of high fantasy content to consume and then i stumbled upon your beloved comic. i just wanted to ask what your favorite worldbuilding decision is for utg and if you could pick dnd classes for any (all) of the characters, what they would be 👀

anyway, i hope you have so much good energy! all the good ideas and epiphanies and magnificent sketches to your heart’s desire ♥️

Oh yay thanks for reading! I hope you enjoy it ☺️

There's two major world things that I'm really happy with and helped a bunch of things click into place I think

One has to do with the magic system, or rather how magic works in that world on a sort of... molecular level? People who've seen me do worldbuilding for a while know I'm cheeky about deriving stuff from physics and loosely drawing parallels here and there, and for the under garden I ended up making it so that a lot of magic runs on wave function interference. Kinda. So the "natural" state of things has its own wave frequencies and magic comes from unnatural frequencies being added into the mix causing shit to go weird

By extension deciding this also made it easier to understand why or how some things can detect magic (they'd pick up on the weird frequencies) AND how it's possible to have magic blocking devices (they emit destructive frequencies that nullify it). Does it fully make sense on a physical level? Not necessarily but I get giddy when I can visualise magic mechanics like this hehe

The other decision was to simplify our lineup of humanoid species from the original DnD esque basis, but in a way that allows us to have basically any humanoid appearance you can think of through a ✨mutation✨ cheatcode. We have two "elf" subspecies (basically the dark elf-like ppl and everyone else, including "dwarf" looking folk, etc) and then a species that technically derives from them (and they're all genetically compatible) that's characterised by having abnormal, often insect-like traits. There's no real limit to their phenotypes since their origin is magical and random in nature, and since they can mix with "normal" elves the degree of bugness varies.

Which means i can have insect people, reptile people, horns or hooves or tails or wings galore without needing to come up with a full background for each of these variants >:)c

ANYHOO sorry I get carried away rambling about these things. Class-wise, I only have claims for some characters who... may be yet to make a full appearance in the comic, and would actually fight:

^ Monk??? Not my first claim but after playing an actual monk the ki system started making a lot of sense

^ Lil' sorcerer u_u probably with a subclass or two but sorcerer would hold up as he grows older

^ I think warlock would work for her well enough. Not a perfect fit but I can see it with some homebrew tweaking

^ Ranger makes sense I feel, she becomes one with the avalanches

^ Barbarian.... barbarian/druid???? Uncharted territory here

^ Warlock but you haven't seen much of it yet.... soon.... (I'm actually so excited for her)

^ This one's easy I just snatched her straight from an old DnD game anyway. That's my rogue artificer babygirl

Anyhoo hope you enjoyed this ramble

[jackiepackiee]

Telemachus x Apollo Blessed! Reader

Chapter Eight

I’m SO SORRY! It’s been forever, but I had a minor surgery and was unable to write for a while. This is my peace offering

Masterlist

It was a break day in Ithaca, one of the calmest days in the week. Most of the people lazing about, resting from a long few days of labor.

But not the royalty, and never the musician.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

You were sitting in an empty room in the palace, save you and the prince. Both on the padded couch near the window, letting the air run to your faces as you strummed away.

He was next to you, trying to figure out some instructions that you had just given him.

Picking at the strings, hopelessly, as the notes never seemed the same.

His face had the same adorable scrunch of concentration he did when he was training. Nose pushing upward as he bit the inside of his cheek. Completely fixated on the instrument… well actually completely fixated on using the instrument to impress you.

But you couldn’t read his mind, and he was glad you didn’t know how hard he was trying to work for your music.

Despite this desire, he soon stops his playing and looks up at you. Setting the lyre on his lap.

“Are you going to finish that song?” He asks, quickly pulling your attention away from the music.

Your brows furrow as you take in his words, looking away for a moment to think.

“What song?” Tilting your head, you look back into his eyes.

He seems set on this specific piece, letting his fluffy hair sway downward as he tilts his head forward. Closer to you and the lyres.

“The one you’re always playing whenever you’re thinking.” He states as if what he’s saying is obvious. “You get this far away look in your eyes and always play the same song.” Pointing to the instrument in your hand, he shakes his head when he sees you’re not understanding.

You quickly squint your eyes, looking at him suspiciously. “I do?”

He pulls back, letting his hands fly up to a defensive position and smiling shyly. Overall bashful. “That… sounds super creepy. I’m sorry!”

You just smile, huffing at his quick reaction before looking out the window to the view of the island.

“It’s okay, really. I just didn’t know I played it that much.”

Wind blew in through the opening, allowing you to close your eyes and relish in the relaxing feeling of air on your skin.

Telemachus couldn’t look away, staring at you in a peaceful moment. Nothing stopping him from his looks, no embarrassment or concern. Like it was natural.

He spoke up after a few moments, poking your lyre in a teasing way. Causing you to open your eyes.

“Is it done?”

You just shake your head, looking down once again and strumming out a few notes. Music playing in the air that kissed both of your faces.

“No, no it’s not done.” You whispered.

“Oh.” He exclaimed, before turning to face away.

Before the moment grows too still, you continue on with your thoughts.

“I didn’t really think I was writing one.” Huffing, you left out a scoff. Smiling at nothing in particular while the sun streams in.

He pauses, looking back your way with his overly gentle eyes. “You didn’t?”

You simply shrug, lifting up your instrument and looking over the intricate golden designs. “I play what I feel.”

“What do you feel?” He asks before he can think, shutting his mouth quickly as he realizes the personal nature of his question.

“…”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean-” Beginning his apology, as he usually does when he talks to you, you interrupt his incoming rambling.

“I guess it’s the fact that I don’t know what I’m feeling. The feeling of… not feeling? Gosh, that makes no sense.” Laughing, while sort of aiming the noise at your own faults, you quiet down and lean against the backrest. Letting silence take over the two of you again.

He looks at you still, hearing your soft breathing in tune with his. As if all the time you’ve spent together is merging you.

His voice breaches the room. “No, I get it. Being uncertain. I get you.”

Looking at you with his soft, kind eyes, you can’t help but look back and let a smile take over our features.

All before you realize how close you are and turn back to the window with a laugh. “What a teacher I am, getting all sappy. You aren’t gonna pick up the lyre at this rate.” Trying to redirect back to your instrument, a cute laugh from him stops your fumbling.

“I like it, I like this. Not like I’m much of a musician anyway.” Looking out to the island as he speaks, you feel your body relax. Not worrying about music or the fact you’re with the literal prince.

All you can do is lean your head to his shoulder, cheek squishing into his side. Body curled against his as he began to blush furiously. Holding his practice lyre tightly, fingers turning white at the grip while his face is painted red.

His long lashes blink in confusion, but he doesn’t dare to ask you why you’re suddenly using him as a rest.

While you’re simply comfortable, eyes far away in thought before turning to face him. Placing your chin on his shoulder.

“Wanna help me write it? Whatever not feeling- feelings I have?” You say as your eyes meet his.

His expression calms, grip not as tight and he becomes less tense.

Easing down at seeing your calmness, he responds while letting one of his hands fix the hair piece you have in.

“Yeah! That would be nice.”

Taglist - @dog-and-cat-person230 @m-carriaga2021 @blessedbyahuntress @cleawritesstuff @b4ts1e @permanently-nothere

@kaguraaaa @rockyeatrock @keikeiluvyou @hijinkxy @doodle-with-rhy @barrythestrawberry041 @dazedemery @sunshinewhosketches @bafb1tch @lethby

@pjopinkk @nishayuro @moonlitenvyillust @emmy6999 @theyumeeighth @plushiesssforcrying @mh4r-squared @sofiafantasies @reapersan @starstarmoon-not-anon @woo-verse

[pauk-di]

Hello! Since I first saw your art for this AU my mind has been making up these headcanons (or rather, behold, a ramble and delusions):

- Regarding that drawing of older(?) D-16 at the party surrounded by "beautiful mechs", given what we know of Optimus, I don't think that he would frequent the parties, and even try and avoid going to them whenever he can (if they want to show "the champions" I'm sure his manager would love to parade him there); it wouldn't be strange for him to use that free time to visit Ratchet or spend time with his son. I imagine that D-16 at first wouldn't be all to happy to attend those but, I imagine that after a while his ego would be quite pleased to see so many beautiful and "shinny" mecha throwing themselves at him. (The encouragement from other gladiators to take lovers would be very in character) ((I'm sorry, I just, saw that post and my mind went 👀!!!!!))

- I'm sorry if you already said something about this, but I have an idea for our fav Soundwave; one involves D-16 trying to befriend the weird-and very intimidating- looking new guy, his reasoning is that no one that cares so much for their cassettes can be a truly cruel person. Soundwave, meanwhile, is baffled over this timid miner that is somehow still alive, and over the gladiator from Iacon, that is stern but always has a kind smile. (I headcanon so hard that Ravage will find the perfect lap to nap in Steelton)

- Speaking of Steelton, one of the reasons he is so distrustful of D-16 -and literally everybody else- is because he may be young, but he's not stupid; he has seen mechs try and get cozy with his Carrier, play the "oh but I love you/I trust you!" card just to try and manipulate him into their puppet/pet. High caste or low caste, all mecha are the same in his mind; greedy to own whatever light that sparks into existence. Steelton sees what his Carrier endures, and understands it, but that doesn't mean that if he could, he would try and give the both of them freedom to just exist.

- I don't know why, but I think that Optimus would be friends with the quiet conjux of the shinny medic that tends to the gladiators (yes I am projecting the "Optimus would go "fuckin finally, someone quiet and seemingly normal" over Breakdown" dream). Also, it's nice seeing Steelton showing interest in something other than training, even if it's paint qualities and styles with the obnoxious medic (and if he can point out a thing or two about the paintings he remembers from Iacon, well, all the better to see his sparkling smile)

Erm, I am sorry about the quality of this ramble (English is not my first language, I'm sorry if anything is confusing or badly written), but I had to get them out of my head. I hope you liked them! I do have the question of what is/has been Ratchet doing meanwhile, and if Optimus managed to get Drift to him before being thrown to the Gladiatorial Pits.

Have a nice day/night!!

Oh my gosh, I love it so much! You guys don't know how happy I am to hear about your opinions/thoughts about the AU! I can read it for hours!

Now let's go:

- You're right, Optimus avoids going to parties as much as possible! Both because he doesn't like the attention and because he hates seeing Megatron surrounded by other mechs. Optimus considers himself too old for Megs. Megatron really hated the attention thrown at him at first, but ego tends to get to your head especially when you're young, he grew to like and crave attention.

-I loved your idea and thanks for sharing it! Ravage will definitely sleep on Steelton's lap haha.

- Steelton only trusts his carrier. One of the reasons why Steelton doesn't trust/like D-16 so much is his uncanny physical resemblance to his sire. The boy sees his carrier suffer and cannot afford to trust anyone. But maybe, in time he will learn to trust.

- This was just cute and I loved it.

- Regarding your question, Ratchet is still working at his clinic in Iacon, but yes, in my AU Ratchet and Drift are a couple. However, it wasn't Optimus who helped Drift.

Thank you so much for sharing this! I loved answering everything

[brittle-biscuits]

Can you do sprunki?

(I AM SO SORRY BUT MY FREIBD DARED ME TO ASK YOU THIS AND I NEED THAT FIVE BUCKSD)

It’s What Friends Do (Sprunki)

Here’s the thing, I wanted to do a Sprunki post, but there’s very little lore or solid base of the characters for me to try it, so I’m mostly winging it here.

———————————————————————

You quickly duck behind a tree, catching your breath while also trying to keep it as quiet as possible.

You didn’t understand what happened. One moment, you were singing pleasant songs with the other Sprunkis, but..when Black wanted to join…

Everything was wrong. Very wrong.

Your friends. Mutilated beyond recognition while others mortified at the sight before them like you were. But one Sprunki scared you the most beyond the rest, Wenda.

You only thought of yourself as acquaintances with her, so imagine your shock when she appeared with blood on her, wielding a drenched knife.

That look in her eyes, empty yet crazy. And the smile, ear splittingly wide.

And now, you can only hope you’ve outran her-

“Y/N~ Come out, come out, wherever you are~”

Looks like you didn’t outrun her enough, hearing her voice somewhere on the opposite side of the tree…

“Don’t you worry, I won’t hurt you. The others, not so much.”

It was bizarre, hearing her nonchalantly brush off her slaughter with that sickeningly casual whispering of her as she cackled.

“You know, it’s not very NICE to hide from your friends. Friends DON’T HIDE from other friends…”

Was she a friend really? Even like this?

You stay where you are, as Wenda seemed to be passing by as she kept rambling.

“It was just so ANNOYING to see you singing with the others. Your precious tune RUINED by such vomit. GAH!”

You felt like your heart stopped when the tree you were hiding behind violently shook. She had stabbed her knife into it from the other side with so much force, she shook the tree.

“Hmm, maybe you have moved on…what am I doing, wasting my time here…”

She pulled back the knife as you hear her presumedly walk away.

You didn’t move for a while, worried that any noise could bring her back. You gave it 15 minutes before you can calm your breathing and peek around the tree.

You didn’t see her, but you did see the violent gash she left on the tree, bits of blood being visible.

With a calm breath, you step out and try to head in the opposite direction-ONLY to be suddenly pinned to the tree, a knife being stabbed right next to your head to keep you trapped.

You were not ready to see that psychotic smiling face right up against yours.

“Found ya~ While you were busy cowering against that tree, I got a gift for you. It’s what friends do for other friends.”

Was…was that Oren’s heart in her hand?

“Since I got you one, where’s my gift? Is it still in your chest? Beating as wonderfully as ever? Mind if I have it now?”

———————————————————————

[worshipfulmercy]

i have so many thoughts about his gender and how he's kind of textually a woman and/or abinary (read tags if interested)

[dizzybizz]

"this is regrettably the best kiss of your life, you understand?"

[thekittyokat]

you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah

[trixxedheart]

It is amazing how the "people that love and uplift transwomen" website will instantly fucking maul a transwoman if she even remotely insinuate that using radfem rhetoric harms trans people

[mochindayo]

I drew something to go along with it, because I saw a drawing pose on pinterest and-- well-- here we are

---- A Human Function to Study ----

The alchemist nodded, his eyes keenly observing how Kaeya’s nostrils quivered, the edges flared and twitched in response to each stroke of the feather. 

“Anything else you could add?”

Kaeya sniffled sharply, his voice was unsteady as his body was preparing to sneeze. “Like…I hHh–I r-really nehHh…hhh….need to snHhehH–! S-sneeze–!”

Albedo hummed, still tickling Kaeya’s nose, pushing Kaeya to the breaking point. “Interesting–”

“ hHh’ihH–Ih’tTSCHhh!! eHEH’tCHH’uhh!! hHh’EH’TSHHhh!!” 

A rapid triple burst out of Kaeya, catching Albedo’s hand in the crossfire. Not that either of them actually minded. Kaeya’s whole body shook with each desperate sneeze. Four, five, six, was he done yet? Kaeya felt relieved when the sneezes had finally come out. It was torture attempting to talk about it while being tickled like that. 

----

[cent-scratchnsniff]

Please don't hurt yourself

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

another day on tumblr reading another post that implies im a miserable racist bigot for thinking i would perhaps like some role playing variety in my role playing game

[flowercrowngods]

It's unreal. The light is streaming in through the windows, the curtains still drawn to block out the midday heat, tinging their living room in golden hues that match so well with the light grey fabric of their new sofa.

Eddie should probably snap out of it and head over to the windows, open the curtains and let the light in, and with it the warmth and fresh air of a surprisingly wonderful day.

It's March, he hears the echoes of Steve's giddy voice a week or two ago. Everything's better in March.

Eddie didn't agree then, and he's not sure he agrees now, but he must admit there is something magical about this moment.

Still he remains rooted to the spot, leather jacket heavy on his shoulders, his hands hidden in the sleeves of it, just in case this really is a dream. Just in case someone will come in and snap him out of it, take away their couch and leave an eviction notice.

It's dumb. But Eddie doesn't deal well with things that are unreal. Things that he knows aren't meant for him. Things that he knows he only gets in this one play-through of his life, while millions of other Eddie Munsons are out there in parallel universes who never get to even lay eyes upon a couch this nice. Let alone buy it. From their own real adult money.

It's a corner sofa, the fabric light grey, and he remembers it being harder than it looks. Solid. Just perfect for both their fucked up backs, scar tissue pulling if they sit wrong for too long, phantom pain and muscle aches coming in hot when all they want is to just relax and enjoy a lazy evening.

Eddie bites his lip, trailing his eyes along the pristine fabric, the pillows lining the back of it, the flawless stitches keeping everything in shape.

They have a couch now. A sofa.

It's so fucking unreal.

He drops to the floor right then and there, sitting with his back against the wall, and never once taking his eyes off their sofa. It feels important to look at it for a while. It feels important to wait for Steve. It feels... It feels like maybe he'll ruin everything if he goes and sits on it now.

And it feels really fucking big.

At some point he hears the front door opening, their lock going so smoothly now that Steve fixed it with some graphite, and the sound makes Eddie smile. That's another thing that's unreal. The key barely making any noise, the lock not rattling, the door not creaking and cracking. Eddie pulls a strand of hair between his lips, the smile feeling too silly for this room, for this home, for everything he gets to have now.

For all the tiny things that matter now. All the tiny things he gets to have, turning the key's smooth slide into an allegory of everything he ever wanted but never dared to hope for.

The slide of curtains, the click-click-click of the window handle being turned to let the air in. The breeze of fresh spring air dancing around his nose.

It's all a little much. It's so fucking addicting.

And then Steve. Socked feet coming to a stop beside him, a hand landing in his hair, a voice that's so endlessly warm and fond and maybe a little worried sounding from above him, "Hi, angel."

"Hi," Eddie says, tearing his eyes away from their couch to meet Steve's. The sunlight from the windows hugs him, making him glow. Eddie smiles. He smiles and smiles and never wants to stop.

Steve hums as he leans down to press a kiss to his forehead, and Eddie weaves his arm through Steve's legs, holding onto his knee.

Everything feels a little less silly now. Like every time Steve doesn't question his little moments of sitting on the floor and just staring at things.

"We have a couch now," Eddie says, because it feels important to point out. Because Steve isn't looking at it.

"We do," he hums. "I got the call earlier. Thanks for helping with that, baby."

Eddie nods again, leaning his cheek against Steve's knee and trailing the couch again with his eyes. It looks brighter now that the curtains don't turn the room into something out of a sepia-type movie anymore.

Steve's hands comb through his hair, massaging his scalp a little with his nails. It's nice. It's warm. It's pretty.

And it's so unreal.

"I'm twenty-four," Eddie says then, and some part of him wants to carve that into the fabric. He won't. But maybe he should carve it somewhere else. "And I own a couch. It's a little crazy."

Steve comes to sit down beside him, their shoulders pressed together and he links their hands, resting them in his lap after a brushes a kiss to Eddie's knuckles.

"Why's it crazy, angel?"

He shrugs, resting his head on Steve's shoulders and curling into his warmth some more.

"Most of my life I never thought either of those would happen, y'know."

Another hum, followed by another kiss to the crown of his head. Another smile.

"But you did it," Steve whispers. "You made it. And we've got a couch now."

"We've got a couch now."

Saying it out loud doesn't make it feel any realer. It only makes his heart race and his eyes prick.

"I love you," he says, finally looking away from pretty grey fabric to meet prettier hazel eyes. "I love you so much."

Steve leans in, kissing the tip of his nose. "I love you. Thank you for buying a couch with me."

And it occurs to Eddie then that Steve understands him. Sitting there on the floor with him, hearing his words and listening to those unsaid, understanding Eddie on such a fundamental level that it should be scary. And it is, sometimes.

But he's not scared now. Because they have a couch. And they have pretty curtains that keep the light outside and still turn the room into something magical. And they have a lock that only needed a bit of graphite to let the keys glide smoothly.

And they have each other.

They stay on the floor until Steve's stomach growls, and they eat dinner with their backs against the couch and Eddie's feet in Steve's lap. They hold each other close after dinner, just breathing each other in as the breeze blows around them.

In the end, Eddie is the first to sit on the couch, with Steve standing between his legs and giving him a scalp massage in silence. In the end, Eddie buries his face in Steve's stomach to hide the tears, and Steve lets him.

Because this is real. And he gets to have this. They both do.

🤍 permanent tag list gang: @skiddit @inklessletter @aringofsalt @hellion-child @stobin-cryptid@hotluncheddie @gutterflower77@auroraplume@steddieonbigboy @n0-1-important@stevesjockstrap @brainvines @puppy-steve @izzy2210 @itsall-taken @mangoinacan13 @madigoround@pukner@i-amthepizzaman @swimmingbirdrunningrock @hammity-hammer @stevesbipanic@bitchysunflower @estrellami-1 @finntheehumaneater @goodolefashionedloverboi @awkwardgravity1 (lmk if you want on or off, for this story or permanently)

[morganmnemonic]

I'm Helen posting again. I just want to give a shout out to these two lines of dialog in particular.

(episode 146)

(episode 187)

Helen says "back when I was Michael" and "I was never Michael." And both sentiments are completely true to her despite the obvious contradiction.

I think this is why Jon had such a hard time with her in particular. The Eye sees truth as a binary thing. Either something is true or it isn't. Either something happened or it didn't. Either Helen was Michael or she wasn't.

The distortion does, at times, represent lies. But I feel like with Helen like this it more often represents messy and complicated truths that defy easy understanding.

Helen was Michael AND she wasn't. That's the most accurate way to describe whats happening here, and something that a person will never be able to comprehend while still holding on to the idea of Truth as something that matters.

Its not about adding a layer of confusion to obfuscate the sensible reality underneath. Its about reality itself being fundamentally confusing.

[sskk-manifesto]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me