#pro sexualized female characters

[tomboymikayla]

What’s a good subreddit name for women who love sexualized female characters?

[malereadermaniac]

Barack bunny pt 2 - Male Reader x Pro-hero's as generals (+bonuses)

This was requested by @jojorefrence23 ! Thought it was such a good sequel idea! word count: 4.6k (loooooong) Nsfw / MDNI ~ amab m!reader / FDNI Characters: Enji, Fatgum, Aizawa, Dabi, Shigi, Shinso + Tamaki, Mirio, Shindo Top!Characters x Bottom!Reader

Inevitably, your reputation as your division's barrack bunny had reached other divisions which weren't lucky enough to be blessed by your presence

Most lieutenants had also heard of you, and news of you had travelled to even some generals

Some were more interested than others, surprisingly few were concerned about your more energetic hobbies - especially as you were a man getting it on with other guys in your devision and not a female cadet; their rules weren't exactly updated to ban gay relationships too!

And so, other people began to talk to you, your presence more known than ever before - most of the guys who were already trying to get with you livid at this

General Aizawa (EraserHead)

Even the most reserved of the generals had become interested in you, the man being called 'eraserhead' behind his back due to the blank expression on his face at all times

To be fair, the man has to manage a bunch of knucklehead young men without getting any ass - so when you basically show up on a platter, it's hard for him not to test the waters

Aizawa already had a softspot for you, as you were one of the less rowdy ones in the bunch - always chipper but never annoying, and always happy to help whenever the overworked general needed it

So once the two of you were all alone in his office as you helped him out with whatever he needed, your trusted general decided to get a little more personal with you

Conversation swept you both up and you two ended up talking until late into the night - Aizawa even comfortable enough to talk about his daughter with you; DILF? Smash.

One thing led to another and the man was holding your waist and your cheek with his slender, rough hands as he kissed you - his tongue completely dominating yours

A few moments later, you were bent over his desk, getting fucked like a cheap slut. Aizawa holding both of your arms back only with one of his hands, the other on the small of your back as his cock fills you up

Your General's whole office had been christened with your moans that night - the muscular man standing naked above you as he came on your face with a horny look in his eyes, holding you in his strong arms as he fucks you against all 4 walls of his office

It's easier to just say that you were very tired the next morning at attention

But ever since then, you were even more Aizawa's favourite

The man did everything in his power (which he had quite a bit of) to keep you away from your other escapades - bakugou being one of the many which would cuss out the general behind his back foe this

The fucking didn't stop either

I mean, the man was constantly stressed and sexually frustrated, and you were young and horny as fuck 24/7

Aizawa's favourite thing to do was call you into his office a few hours after training, watching you walk into his office with a smile and pep in your step always made him feel at ease

The sexy general would then gesture towards his crotch with his head and eyes, those sunken, sexy eyes of his

Within the next minuet, you're under Aizawa's desk, his cock slipped out out of his cammo cargoes, half of his veiny, thick dick down your throat and your hand wrapped around whatever you couldn't get in

And while the situation only really pleasured your general, you couldn't help but feel incredibly turned on by the sight above you - Aizawa moaning and grunnting, his long, muscular arms hanging down his sides as his chin is tilted up to show his sexy stubble, his sexy eyes looking down at you with a look than sends shivers down your spine

The man also always sports a black, tight tanktop every time he's in his office - a comfort thing - and fucking hell does he look delicious with his muscles popping out of that top, sweat clearly dampening the material as he pants and moans from your mouth

But don't think the man stops there, Aizawa is more than happy to return the favour after you'd pleasure him so, so nicely - so for another hour or two you're usually stuck in his office; his veiny fingers inside of you as your usually reserved general laps at your twitching cock, you cumming on his face and hair everytime as if on a schedule, the action followed up by a couple rounds of his cock re-arranging your guts

Late Night talking is very common with you two - like with most of your other partners, they feel comfortable around you - you two chat about life and other things, Aizawa feels at home with you

The man knew he was in deep shit when he caught himself fantasising about you meeting Eri back home...

General Taishiro (Fatgum)

Easily the most popular and well liked general in your entire unit - earning a nickname from the troops to show how friendly he was with you guys

Fatgum - as the blonde, muscular man was still somehow in shape despite eating like he'd been starved for days at every single meal time

Taishiro is a very attractive man, and so he was very used to women and men pouncing on him and offering themselves to him whenever they built up the courage - and that's exactly what he expected you to do

You may as well be walking around with a scarlet letter on you, because litterally everyone you talked to knew about how you get down and dirty - so of fucking course your favourite general had to know too!

However, when you didn't pounce on General Taishiro, and instead barely gave him a second look, that's when the man became interested - predicable really

All of the troops in your unit loved this man, and you did too, and that's exactly why you barely gave your general a second look

You didn't want to ruin your friendship with him or his view of you, or even his relationship with your fellow troops (some of whom would threaten to fight the man)

But your views on the matter definitely changed one night, when Taishiro 'accidentally' bumped into you

It was just after training, you had just showered after having a little fun with Kirishima and weren't looking when you turned the corner to leave the shower room

That's when your face smashed into not a hard, cold wall, but instead the warm, soft, bare chest of your general

You apologised but the general took the opportunity to strike up conversation - knowing very well that he was fully nude except for a very small towel around his hips, his muscular body on full display

But the blonde actually couldn't believe it when your eyes didn't stray from his even once the whole conversation - he couldn't say the same about his, your nude body looked like it was made for him

The man even thought he'd heard wrong, that you weren't the barrack bunny everyone claimed you were

However the hickeys covering your neck and the lovebites on your shoulders and nipples blew that thought away

It took you by surprise when Taishiro's attitude slightly changed, his tone more dominant - but what the general actually said was what caught you by surprise

"Come take a shower with me"

No question mark at the end or anything, it was more like an order

The next thing led to another and the two of you were passionately making out in a shower stall, your general much taller than you as he held his huge, manly hand around your waist and gently caressing your cheek with his thumb

Taishiro was literally taking your breath away, all that could be heard in the shower room was a small stream of water from the shower and you sexy, breathy pants as the general you viewed as a friendly guy was holding you up in his massive arms with ease and eating you out in his arms!

Fuck the man knew what to do to turn you on!

The poor water bill that night must of been through the roof because you and your sexy, manly general didn't stop fucking until the sun came up - amd for most of the night he held you up in his arms! Strong ass man I tell you!

His loads filled you up to brim after just a 3 rounds - those rounds having lasted an hour each!!!

So to call it a night, Taishiro decided to gently finger his thick cum out of you- making you cum in the process and giving the blonde general an incredible image to think about whenever he has some alone time...

'Wait... why was General Taishiro showering in the common showers when he has his own??'

Your relationship didn't stop there either! Your friendly general joining the group of men that were wrapped around your finger

But man were the others livid, because the blonde made sure everyone knew he was now also up in your guts at least twice a week by making sure to sit next to you every meal time

The blonde would eat his food with the generals even quicker than normal, pop some gum in and come and wiggle hid way right next to you, his muscular arms dropped around you as he gives smug looks to the other troops

His office had become the usual place for you two as well - the snacks in his mini-fridge coming in handy when you're exhausted and hungry from fucking like animals

His favourite thing to do is to eat you out on his desk, his long, warm tongue doing things to you you'd never experienced - his favourite part being you grabbing his sexy blonde hair once you get oh so close to cumming

But Taishiro wasn't opposed to 'quietly' (loud as fuck) have sex in your bed with the others

You really woke up a smug part of him, one that wants to show you off, show off how only his big, veiny, uncut cock makes you moan like a bitch in heat

General Todoroki (Enji)

The highest ranking general which all of the troops barely ever saw - even his sons rarely saw him unless they were reporting their weekly tasks

Strict and no-bullshit is how most people described General Todoroki - and definitely unopposed to nepotism; his sons were both in higher ranks just cause!

But another way his underlings would describe him is sexually frustrated

The man was divorced and hadn't gotten a piece of ANYTHING in at least a year - so when your activities were reported to him by a worried little troop, his ears perked up

You were scared shitless the whole day after being called to his office for 8pm - but your guys and even Shoto assured you it was going to be nothing bad

But your heart certainly sank when you walked into that office and saw the chief general sitting in his chair with his huge arms crossed across his beefy chest and a look on his face that could only be described as a scowl

When General Enji started with "I've heard of you and your... relations" my god were you actually shaking

But you didn't expect him to cut you a deal

"I won't pass the concern on... as long as you can please me well enough"

And the rest was history

As you'd expect, after having earth-shattering sex on both behalf - Enji becoming addicted to your tight body and sexy features after being celibate for so long - you two continued having 'meetings' every few weeks whenever the chief called you to his office

And the man is just as anyone would think he is in bed - a fucking sadistic dom!

Enji loved having you service him below his desk, chocking on his thick cock and trying to stifle your sounds, gripping his thick, muscular thighs when someone walks into his office to talk about something

If you even make a sound which Enji has to make an excuse for, as soon whoever was bothering Enji leaves, you get pulled up into the huge General's lap and get spanked so, so much

The sadist makes you count his slaps out loud, his massive, rough hands leaving bright red marks on your ass to adorn his love bites from previously eating you out

Enji likes to see you cry - not in a horrible way, but either due to your gag reflex, his spanking, or from the sheer amount of pleasure you were being subjected to

Unlike the other guys who have fallen for you, Enji doesn't get jealous of the others - the General knows that he's at the top of the hierarchy and that you are pretty much at his beck and call, the others don't have that power over you

Oh and the man really eats up the whole power synamic - practically ripping his cargoes at the seam with his boner whenever you calm him 'sir'or 'general'

If there's one thing the man doesn't like, it's that his sons are getting a piece of you too - he feels a little weird about it, but he mainly feels a carnal need to posses you in that respect; if he sees Shoto talking to you woth that lovestruck look in his eyes, expect a 'meeting' later that day

Oh and another thing General Enji fucking loves is after he cums inside of you; you on his lap lazily leaning against his desk, regaining your composure, his huge dick still stretching you as his cum leaks from your hole, and my god your much smaller, fucking spent cock, semi-flaccid just resting on your stomach.... it makes the man want another round instantly

Lieutenant Shigiraki (Defo OOC)

Another kinda reserved guy in your course - but once you break down his walls, Shigi is really just a sweet guy

The two of you became quite friendly after you managed to get him to talk - and you kinda gathered that he's never really had any friends (other than Lieutenant Todoroki)

And you can tell this because after only a few conversations with the Lieutenant, he was oversharing so, so much about his life

How he's never really had friends, how he's never even kissed anyone because he's insecure about his dry skin and because he thinks he's ugly

And when you comfort him and assure him that he's quite attractive, you realised that Shigi hasn't ever even experienced a compliment before - HOW SAD WAS THID GUYS LIFE??

And again, you could tell this because the man got a VERY obvious boner when you complimented him.....

It became very obvious that Shigiraki had developed a crush on you very quickly, the man looking for you every second of the day and spending time around you - not even talking! Just hanging

And my lord when he found out from Dabi about your reputation. Shigiraki literally went full on emo, he got mad at you whenever you tried to talk to you and all!

It was only when you waited for him outside of his room that he HAD to talk to you

And even then, he didn't talk! He listened to your demands of asking what was wrong, but halfway through, your words were falling on dead ears as he became captivated by your looks - your body looking incredible in your unit's pyjamas

Shigiraki then cutting you off after not being able to deal with his achingly hard cock anymore, his rough yet warm hands grabbing your face and his lips crashing against yours

For an inexperienced guy, Shigiraki was a fucking good kisser

The cliche struggling to open the door and get inside the room while stripping occurred as the two of you didn't break the kiss - and again, for a fucking virgin Shigiraki was incredible

People had been missing out! The man was well endowed with a horse cock on him! Long but not too thick as to break you, veiny and white with a cute pink, uncut tip - guessing he'd learnt how to expertly use it and his hands for a matter of fact from all the porn he told you he watches (romantic gay porn mind you)

Guess Internet access after 9pm was a bonus from being a lieutenant

Anyways, after your first sexual affair with the stereotypical 'I like my white boys malnourished' lieutenant, the two of you continued what you had going on

Shigiraki fucking loved the way you looked in any of the provided uniform - the pyjamas, the cargoes, the tank tops; all of it just made you look so hot to him

Also, for a lieutenant, the man surely liked to be dominated a little (guess that's why he's in the army!)

Shigiraki fucking loved it when you held his hands above his head and rode him to high-heaven, moving down to kiss him and his neck as you listen to his slutty moans

His hands just felt right around your hips, their dry exterior a nice contrast to your sweaty and hot skin

And my god does this masochist fucking LOVE IT when you tug so harshly on his hair when he's fucking tou missonary and you're about to cum hard - the man spending at least an hour a day looking at the sexy scratch marks adorning his surprisingly muscular back

Like everyone else smitten with you, Shigi also fucking hated that any other man was blessed with your touch and your taste or even just your pressance and breath - but Shigiraki was like actually going crazy over it, visibly jealous and possessive over you whenever another guys tried to talk to you when he was with you

Many guys have talked about it and even put the fact that their all fucking you aside to try and deal with the way Shigi was behaving - 6 of them having a 'chat' with him, which you had to deal with the consequences of and scold them all

But you can't get mad at your lieutenants possessiveness, he's just too cute and smitten for you!

Lieutenant Todoroki (Dabi)

By far one of the sexiest men in your unit, a man who came to the army straight after college and never left - his literal battle scars as proof of that

Dabi was one of the first few that you had caught the eye of - and since his literal father was in charge, he'd had quite a few partners in his time in the army, so the rugged man decided to try his luck with you

And boy oh boy! Did he manage to rizz you the fuck up! The taller man having you up against a wall within seconds of chatting with you, his knee rubbing your crotch gently doing 'the thing'

Basically, you were making out with one of your lieutenant only a week or two into your service - the muscular, dominant man roaming his hands all over your body in order to feel you and get to know you even better

Dabi was instantly addicted to your taste, your warmth, the sounds you would make as he hugs your waist and kisses you deeper turning the man on even more

And wow, history was made when the two of you managed to break off of each other enough to get to Dabi's private room

That man fucked you to heaven and back TWICE - you're pretty sure your whole unit somehow heard you from across the dorms!

And ever since then, the two of you have kept each other entertained when in need of it - you visit Dabi's room very frequently

The lieutenant just can't get enough of you, he's fucked so many people before but the way your tight ass just sucks his veiny cock in gets him going!

Dabi's also very confident in his relationship with you (whatever that relationship may be) cause he doesn't not give a fuck if other guys try to assert their dominance around you and him, Dabi just chuckles when other guys flirt or talk to you cause he knows that you and him are like a puzzle - the way his hips lock against the smooth of your ass in Doggy, the was his dick fills you up just right, the way his rough, scarred hands spank you and grip your skin; all of him just fits with all of you.

The thing that gets under Dabi's skin is that his younger brother gets to see and feel you in the way he does - he teases Todoroki endlessly about how much better of a time you have with Dabi rather than with him, or that he's sorry to his little bro but you're just insatiable around Dabi!

You inly intervene when you see it happen (but you can't really complain, it gets Todoroki really fired up the next time you two fuck)

Dabi's biggest thing is showing off his power/status by doing shit with you in front of other troops - it just turns the lieutenant on so, so much to know: a) how embarrassed yet very turned on you're getting and, b) how the others can't really say or do much about it unless they want to get written up by Dabi! They're just sentenced to the punishment of watching your body get fondled, your neck kissed and your dick and ass played with right in front of them

Fingering you is another huge thing for Dabi - 69-ing is literally his favourite foreplay with you because he gets to feel your wet, warm, tight throat around his big dick and to also see your tight hole clench around his fingers as he laps at it from time to time~

Dabi is surprisingly good at aftercare too! If you'd ask him if he was your boyfriend, he'd laugh in your face - but Dabi takes care of you and keeps you close as if you're a married couple!

The man likes to hold you close, the two of you bare-chested in some oversized sweats just breathing in each other's scents in a comfortable silence - a few sweet nothings being whispered from time to time

Shinso Hitoshi

This poor man joined the army as an escape - a place where he could make some friends and chill, a daily routine but with no life struggles

That was until he got roped into your whirlwind of a life!

It wasn't your fault that it happened, Shinso was to blame for letting himself into temptation and kissing you after months of sexual and romantic tension building up within your friendship

The two of you were close, Shinso a little more closed off, but happy to listen to your hyperactive rambling - but once the sunken eyed man kissed you one night, shit really changed

Shinso wasn't a virgin, but he'd never had actually good sex, so his mind was fucking blown when he came within minuets - feeling like an orgasm from his hand x10!

After you two fucked, Shinso was on you like a bee to a flower, literally inseparable

The man was either always touching you or near you and whenever the two of you could get it on, he would make SURE that you did

And because you were Shinso's first real partner, the man did start to confuse sex for romance - but he of course knew of your free-spirited nature and never ask you out...

The sex was great though, and he would stay haply with that, hearing your sexy moans in his ear along with his name in your whiny voice was enough for now

You had to show Shinso quite a few things, like how to finger you and how to pump his hips just right to make you weak, he was so cute, playing attention for how to make you feel amazing

And holy shit was this man's mind BLOWN when you sucked him off - his dick n balls hanging out of his unzipped camo cargoes, his muscles sweating against his white tank top just moaning as he looked down on you slobbering on his dick

He's also pretty good around others, well at least he seems to be

Shinso is too reserved to try to be possessive over you around other guys, but man, does he freak out on the inside!

Shinso will be internally screaming and thinking of beating whoever is touching you so sexually tf up! But he'd feel too embarrassed to ever mention it to you! Settling on covering you in more of his lovebites than usual...

Shinso is another man who just looks fucking stunning in army uniform, he used to work out a lot as he wouldn't hang out with people that much - and it fucking shows!

His muscular arms and fucking TONED abs look so good in his white tank, his stature just oozing SEX

And those combat boots.... Once Shinso starts to get more comfortable when having sex with you - he uses them boots real good.

His arms crossed against his chest ad he sits on a chair in an empty room, you on your knees below him as he rubs your dick harshly with his boots, cooing at you as a wet stain forms on your crotch from your pre~

Short bonuses!:

Tamaki Amajiki

Another super shy and reclusive guy, he only really joined the army for Mirio but meeting you was an added bonus!

You two don't fuck as much as Tamaki insist on hanging out - his face always dusted with a faint blush whenever he's around you

But when you two fuck, my god is it incredible - the man is shockingly good with his hands but he gets tired after only one round! But you can't complain, he's just so cute, snuggling into your naked body

And good lord, the way that his uniform is so oversized on him... it just makes you want to mentally undress him every time you see him

Mirio Togata

Another man who was built for the army - holy fuck does Mirio look so GOOD in an army uniform

The man works out constantly, his body like that of a god - his back and arms fucking huge, his abs like a washing board and his thighs deliciously suffocating (the uniform just extenuating his sexy features)

The two of you started fucking as a way to release stress, offering your help to a stressed looking Mirio led to your throat being stuffed with his cock and your nose with his pubes - and then later on your poor back arching to its limits as he wraps his huge hands around your waist and pushes you down to his bed as he drills his huge cock inside of you

Yes the man is a gentle giant when you two aren't shagging, but call an ambulance for yourself when you are - this man likes to rough you tf up

Yo Shindo

This man joined the army to try and feel powerful - he's so clearly insecure, so he tries to be the tough guy in your troop, always working out and always a dick to everyone

The two of you had your first encounter in the communal showers, the man had you on your knees real quick, his cum covering your face, your tongue cleaning his dick off

Shindo also really likes to flex while fucking your throat or ass, showing off his buldging muscles and hairy pits in his army tanktop feeds his ego and turns you on...

[anniflamma]

So I’ve received a couple of anonymous messages telling me that they were really disappointed in me for liking Elian's Antinous fanart. Instead of answering them individually, I’m just going to make an angry rant post instead. Most of if probably won't make sense anyway.

This post have talk about SA, and homophobia. Be aware. I don’t ship genuinely Telemachus and Antinous, if that’s what you’re wondering. I didn’t even consider the possibility that ship could even exist. At the end of the day, I don't care about that ship.

And do you want me to explain that I know SA is bad? Or that I’m aware Telemachus/Antinous is a toxic ship? Do you think I’m dumb and don’t know that? You don't have to explain to me either, I know that SA is bad, I have experienced it, you don't have to explain to me, trust me I know.

I like Elian's art because it’s really beautiful. Her work is a huge inspiration and encouragement for me when making animatics. But do I REALLY have to spell out, word for word, that I know Antinous is an antagonist and tries to do bad things? Does it mean every time someone draws Antinous and I like it, I have to explain that I like the drawing because it’s well done, not because I support Antinous’ intent toward Penelope and wants to kill Telemachus?

I mean, I’ve seen tons of thirsty comments like, "I hate how Zeus treats women, but your design is really hot" or "Even if Poseidon SA Demeter, this Poseidon I'd go down on all fours for!"

I have seen some stuff….

I guess I could just imitate something like that????

But I know it’s a joke and I know its a fantasy that someone is expressing. Its not real, its fictional. I know all those thirsty ppl who simp over Poseidon, Zeus, or even Antinous aren’t supporting hatred and violence toward women. And yes, I am expecting that you should already know this too. Because if we gonna assume the worst of ppl… Then everyone who likes Greek myth/Epic the musical are pro SA. "Do you like Crice from Epic the musical? That means that you support her actions, you support SA!" "Oh you like Odysseus?! He killed a baby and all of his female slaves cuz they got SA by the suitors! You support infanticide, slavery and SA!" Do you hear how dumb that sounds? To be honest, I wouldn’t be that surprised if there are some who think like this. I mean, this discussion wouldn’t even be a thing, right.

And if you don’t know, I literally make thirst art of Poseidon (and that includes Zeus and Hermes), and you don’t see it as a bad thing??? It’s Poseidon… Do you know what he has done to women in the myths?!

Im going to ramble here and I will bring up stories from greek myth that have SA in it. So be aware.

One example is the story of Caeneus. When Caeneus was a woman, his parents left him to take care of the house while they were out running errands. Poseidon took that as an opportunity to break into the house and sexually assault him. This is probably the only myth where Poseidon actually feels bad after what he did, so he grants Caeneus a wish. Aww, how sweet~~~ /sarcasm.

Do I need to give an example of Zeus? We all know what Zeus does. But hey, I’ve made Poseidon/Hermes ship art. And guess what? There’s a story where Hermes breaks a woman’s leg so she can’t run away from him, and then he sexually assaults her. Isn’t that cute~~! /sarcasm

Heck, I can even go on with my biblical ships. David/Jonathan—David, a serial assaulter and murderer, and Jonathan, a mass murderer. But do I support their actions? No, I do not support mass murder, and its really dumb that I have to spell it out for you.

Daniel/Darius is even questionable too! It's literally a king and his servant, and that power imbalance is so big I don’t know what to tell you! Do I have to spell it out that I know that, in real life, king/servant relationships aren’t cute at all?!

All of these characters that I’ve listed have done or represent horrible things. And I have to tell you that I don't support their actions?! Really? You really can't think outside the box?

But do you see what I’m trying to tell you? We can simp over other ancient mythological figures but Antinous is the red line that we can never cross??? It’s hypocritical and immature, that’s what it is.

Right now, ppl loves the Ody seduces Zeus art I made. And that "ship" is well really questionable too! But nobody have called me a witch and tries to burn me at the stake yet. 😐

And the thing is, I can separate these fictional characters from the real world. I can also separate the fictional material from other fictional interpretations. Exemple, I like The Song of Achilles, in it, they are the same age, but I am also aware that in the Iliad, Achilles is 16 and Patroclus is 26. But do I automatically assume that Madeline Miller likes teens? No! Do I assume that everyone who likes The Song Of Achilles like that shit? No!

But we still can have a disscussion about it without making it into a witch trial.

As long as we can separate different fictional materials, then everything is fine. It only becomes a problem if a person can’t separate them. Then we have a problem. I can acknowledge that my depiction of King David from the bible is not the same as from the original story and that he is horrible person towards women. If I couldn't acknowledge that, then its bad! The same goes for Antinous if someone makes an AU or headcanon about him. If someone want so make AUs about Antinous, my first thoughts isnt "Oh they like to SA ppl!". At the end of the day, this is just a group from tiktok who didn’t like a toxic ship and decided to bully an artist while acting like they have superior morals.

And I get this type of shit from christians when I make my queer bible interpitations, both from those that don't like the queer stuff but also those that points out that David and Jonathan were horrible ppl.

So I rarely answer comments like this because they usually end up spewing beliefs filled with homophobia and Islamophobia. Heck rasism sometimes, apparently, Christians don’t know that the Bible takes place in the Middle East, and they are angry at me for drawing them looking like Arabs! I just delete their comments before they gets there. Making queer biblical animatics on TikTok that go viral on the Christian side is not fun at all guys....

And hate to say it but tiktok Epic fans sound really similar. You are acting like you’re on a pedestal, holier than thou. Its just a different font.

+ I haven’t forgotten all those homophobic comments I got on my David/Jonathan animatic that I posted right after my Ruthlessness animatic. Epic fans were saying they didn’t want “that gay shit” and wanted to see more Epic stuff. Hate to break it to you all, but the Epic fandom isn’t that innocent.

[kimkaelyn]

Under the Festival Lights [s. todoroki]

→ summary: when a mission wraps up earlier than expected, you and shouto take advantage of the unexpected but welcomed free time to enjoy the local festival.

→ pairing: shouto todoroki x fem!reader

→ word count: 4.9k

→ warnings & tags: sfw, pro hero au, coworkers to lovers, female pronouns, usage of y/n, aged-up characters (early to mid-twenties), reader has a quirk (Heat Sight) and a hero name (Sunspot), brief appearance of child oc, reader down bad, sexual activity is hinted, Shouto may be ooc. | please kindly let me know if I missed any tags!

→ authors note: here is my contribution to the pretty boy summer collab hosted by the amazing @andypantsx3! ngl, writing this was pretty rough so I apologize if it is a little all over the place.

“Well, that was hard,” you mused sarcastically as you walked down the sidewalk, hands stuffed in your pockets. You paid no mind to the staggered gasps from the locals and indiscreetly raised phone cameras as you and your dual-haired companion made your way to the transportation terminal.

The two of you were dispatched to the island in response to a report of a foreign hiker who had fallen from a cliffside. The place he was in was too difficult for the local rescue team to reach, so they called for Pro Heroes to help—you and Shouto. Your Quirks were a good match for this mission; your Heat Sight could easily locate the hiker through his heat signature and Shouto’s Half-Cold Half-Hot could create a path to his location. You arrived at the island within an hour by catching a lift from a Coast Guard helicopter that was also responding to the call, however, when the two of you arrived, you were shocked yet relieved to find the hiker had managed to climb back up on his own. He was fine save for a few cuts and scratches.

“You are fortunate you didn’t sustain life-threatening injuries.” Shouto had advised the man as he was lifted into the helicopter to take him back to the mainland to be evaluated at a hospital, just to be safe.

Your companion hummed. “At least the man is safe.”

“Yeah,” you replied. “Paperwork’s gonna be a breeze.” You would never say it aloud, but part of you was a little disappointed you didn’t get to see the handsome Pro at work—albeit you would be working too so you wouldn’t have much time to check him out.

Shouto didn’t comment further as the two of you continued on your trek.

“Sunspot! Shouto!” a voice suddenly called out. You turned to find a boy who could be no more than seven years old staring up at you with stars in his eyes and smiling the widest grin you think you have ever seen.

“Awe, hi buddy!” you greeted with a smile, immediately squatting down to be at eye level with the boy. “How are you?” You felt your heart squeeze when he began to giggle under your attention. He made a grabbing motion with his hands and you had about five seconds to spread your arms before he ran into your chest. “Oh my, you’re so strong!” you exclaimed with a faux wheeze as you felt his small arms squeeze around your midsection. You gently wrapped your arms around his tiny body, tucking him under your chin.

“My deepest apologies!” a new voice said. You looked up to the young woman you assumed to be the boy’s mother, the matching hair and eye color a dead giveaway. “Yuki doesn’t quite understand personal boundaries yet.”

You smiled, trying to ease her worries. “It’s alright, ma’am,” you assured her. “He’s fine. I don’t mind.” Shouto crouched beside the two of you but you didn’t take your eyes off the boy in your arms. He was so little; you were afraid he would break if you applied any more pressure.

You glanced sideways at the dual-haired Hero next to you. He was staring at you and the boy with a content-like expression on his face.

“Is everything okay, kid?” he asked Yuki. The boy leaned back to see who addressed him, and his eyes widened when he realized it was Pro Hero Shouto who was speaking to him.

“Shouto!” the boy cried, untangling from your arms and flinging himself towards the Pro, who easily caught him just as you had. Your heart skipped a beat as you watched the boy snuggle into his chest, like a baby koala hanging onto its mother.

You heard the mother’s breath hitch at the sight. Me too, girl, you thought as your heart squeezed painfully at how adorable the sight of Shouto embracing the child in his safe hold was as he softly conversed with the boy. “What is your name?”

“Yuki Fukumoto.”

Shouto smiled—not a full teeth smile, just a closed-lip one—at the boy and inclined his head to him. “It is nice to meet you, Yuki. My name is Shouto Todoroki and I am a Pro Hero.”

Yuki giggled enthusiastically. “I know that!” he exclaimed with glee, happiness dripping from his figure like drops from the sun. Instead of you being Sunspot, he should be. “You one of the Tops!”

You hid your snicker behind a hand, basking in the dumbfounded look on Shouto’s face. “Really? Wow, you really do know your Pros, then.” You know he was merely indulging the child, but it still did things to your heart. The boy nodded in affirmation and snuggled deeper into Shouto’s chest.

“Are you here for the festival, Sunspot?” the boy's mother inquired, drawing your attention from the heart-attack-inducing scene before you.

“The festival?” you echoed, your brows turning downward with confusion. “No, ma’am. Shouto and I were dispatched here for a rescue operation but the man was successfully retrieved before we arrived.”

She nodded her understanding. “So that is what the Coast Guard chopper was for.” She muttered, briefly glancing over to Yuki and Shouto, who were discussing the latter’s apprehension of a wanted fugitive a few weeks back. She turned back to you with a smile. “Praise you Heroes for always rushing to the scene, no matter where it is! It must’ve been a bumpy ride.”

You bashfully returned her smile. “You mentioned there is a festival happening?”

“Oh, yes! The island’s annual summer festival is today.” She said, her demeanor brightening as she spoke. “It is a lovely event! Yuki and I were actually on our way there before we ran into you guys.”

“Really? Oh my gosh, ma’am, I am so sorry for holding you up!” you quickly apologized with a bow. You felt your face start to burn as anxiety and embarrassment rose within. You began to step towards Shouto with the intention of yanking him up by his collar and rushing the two of you out of there as fast as possible but the sound of Yuki’s mother’s laughter stopped you.

“Sunspot, I assure you it’s all right.” She raised a hand over her mouth, attempting to quell her laughter. “Besides, it isn’t often we have Pro Heroes on the island, so this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for Yuki to meet two of his favorite Heroes.”

Your eyebrow quirked. “Are we the first Heroes he has seen?” you inquired.

“Yes. In-person, at least.” Upon hearing that, you got an idea.

“Ma’am, I don’t want to keep you from your established plans any longer, but would it be all right if we took a quick picture with Yuki before you go?” Shouto directed his attention to the boy's mother at your question, who eagerly nodded her head. With a smile, you crouched in front of Yuki and your partner. “Yuki, would you like to take a photo with us?” At your question, a smile that could rival the sun took over his features once more as the three of you looked to the camera and posed.

“Thank you so much.” Yuki’s mother said, bowing deeply. “Yuki, dear, what do you say to the Heroes?” She prompted her son with a gentle hand on his back.

“Thank you!” the boy said, his eyes sparkling as he excitedly waved goodbye to you and Shouto as his mother led him away.

“He’s so cute!” you exclaimed to your partner as you watched the mother and son disappear around a street corner.

“He was,” Shouto agreed.

“Perhaps his mom will post the photo on social media and we can share it on our pages.” You smiled in excitement, silently hoping you would see the photo on your timeline tonight during your routine browsing while curled up in the warmth of your bed before you drifted off to dreamland.

Your dual-haired companion hummed in either agreement or acknowledgment, you couldn’t tell which. “We should be on our way to the airport now, Sunspot.” Shouto intoned matter of factly. “Our mission wrapped up over an hour ago. We wouldn’t want to keep the pilots waiting longer than necessary.” He said, referring to the pilots for your flight back to the mainland.

“No, we don’t,” you answered with a sigh. So much for checking out the Festival, you thought gloomily. “Alright, let’s go.”

“I’m sorry, but WHAT?!” you exclaimed, mouth open in disbelief.

The check-in desk attendant gave you a small smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes, and that’s when you felt the subtle annoyance radiating from her. “I’m sorry, but all outgoing flights, both on planes and helicopters, are grounded for the night due to a sudden and fast-developing storm system in the Bay.”

“What about the ferry?” Shouto asked. He was standing beside you, five times more level-headed than you were at the moment. “A ferry runs twice a day to and from the mainland.”

“You are correct, Shouto, about the scheduled ferry,” the attendant said, barely holding back the bite of her words. “But no boats are coming in either. The surf is too rough.” She eyed the two of you as she paused to take a sip of coffee. “With all due respect, no sane Captain would sail out in those conditions; Hero or not.” A smirk grew on her lips, her eyes lighting up as she continued. “If you are so desperate to return to the mainland by tonight, I suggest you two should contact your ‘friends’. Perhaps Endeavor or All Might can send somebody to pick you up.” That said, she harshly pulled down the window blinds, ending the conversation. The metallic clatter echoed ominously through the terminal lobby—emphasizing the finality of her actions and the reality of your situation.

The two of you stood there in shocked silence for a moment before Shouto released a heavy sigh and massaged his temples.

“Who spit in her coffee,” you grumbled under your breath as you crossed your arms. “That was such a low blow—what she said.” When your dual-haired companion didn’t immediately reply, you turned to check on him. He was staring off into space, a hand positioned on his chin as he seemingly pondered the next course of action for the two of you. If he was irked by the attendant’s comment about the ex-Flame Hero, he hid it well.

“Hey,” your soft, reassuring voice brought him out of his thoughts. You placed a hand on his bicep—shoving down the excited twist of your stomach when his muscles tensed and bulged under your touch. “I’m sorry this whole day hasn’t gone according to plan but we shouldn’t stress over it.” You smiled softly. “Let’s look at the bright side; we have some time to R&R! We can explore the island, taste the local cuisine—have some time to ourselves to be civilians instead of Pro Heroes.”

Shouto stared at you in what could almost be controlled bewilderment as he thought over your proposition. You caught a glimmer in his heterochromatic eyes and knew he had made a decision. “Okay,” he agreed with a nod. “What should we do?” he questioned. “What do you have in mind?”

“Well, Yuki’s mom mentioned there’s a festival in town today and said that we should check it out before we leave.” You explained. “It’s been so long since I’ve attended a summer festival and I think this will be a nice way to spend the evening.” You smiled as you thought back to your youth when you would spend every summer up until middle school at your grandma’s. She had a large backyard garden where she would grow vegetables such as cucumbers, edamame, and tomatoes to sell at the community market and the town’s yearly end-of-the-season festival. You fondly remember helping her load the wagon with the produce and walking to the market every morning at sunrise. While your grandma was selling her vegetables, you would run up and down the festival grounds with a few local children, playing games and stuffing your tiny faces with kakigori, takoyaki, and whatever other sweets you could get your hands on.

Shouto’s voice brought you back to the present. “I have never been to a summer festival before.” He stated nonchalantly. “I would like to attend my first one with you tonight.”

Your eyes widened and you felt warmth rush to your face at his words. “O-okay,” you stuttered. “Awesome!” You clasped your hands together. “Let’s get going, then!”

Ten minutes later, you and Shouto were back walking around the streets of the quaint island town. Once again the locals and tourists gawked at the two of you as you made your way to the festival grounds, but no one approached. You and Shouto made small talk on your way, discussing the fast-approaching Hero Gala next month.

“I met with my designer last week, but for the life of me, I cannot decide what color I want to wear—let alone what dress!” you groused, hands wildly moving about as you explained your dilemma to your partner. “I am running out of time and that doesn’t aid in my decision-making. Deadlines just make me want to procrastinate more.”

Shouto hummed. “I wear the same suit with a different tie and undershirt,” he glanced at you. “Why do you not do the same with a dress?” His dry tone made him sound condescending to those who didn’t know the dual-haired Pro Hero as well as you do, but you knew he was making a genuine inquiry.

You laughed. “I guess I could do that, but we women are under different expectations than you men. If I were to do that, the press would call me lazy and unmotivated.” You shrugged. “Believe me, if the press's opinion didn’t matter so much in our line of work, I would wear whatever the hell I wanted to the Gala.”

The corners of your partner’s mouth tilted upwards at your statement, but it only lasted a moment. “If you are having difficulty choosing a color then perhaps you should wear the same color as me,” he suggested. “We can match.”

“Really?” you asked, taken aback. “Wouldn’t that be kinda weird?”

“I do not see how it could be seen as unusual for us to do so. We work at the same Agency and are partners.”

I can see the logic behind that, you thought. But people would think we are a couple. The two of you moved to the side to let an elderly couple walk by undisturbed. “Thank you,” the man tipped his hat. You smiled and nodded your head, watching as he and his wife continued on their way. You cleared your throat when you and Shouto were side-by-side again. “Well, what color are you wearing this year?”

“Blue,” he responded without pause. “I think this specific shade would look ravishing on you, Y/N. It will bring out the color of your eyes.”

“R-really?” you inquired, breath hitching. You were shocked by Shouto’s forwardness. Where did the reserved boy you had known go? Though you weren’t necessarily complaining. “You think so?”

The dual-haired boy nodded again. “I do.”

Before you could reply, the two of you rounded a corner and found yourselves at the festival grounds. Your attention was immediately snagged by the atmosphere; the sounds of children laughing as they ran around with their small kites and ribbons, the smell of takoyaki fresh off the griddle, and the taste of happiness in the air. Your brain was going into overdrive, rapidly taking in your surroundings.

There were so many different stalls and food being served that you didn’t know where to begin. As if the gods could sense your pause, suddenly the most mouthwatering scent hit your nostrils. You spun on your heel, searching for the source—there! The delicious scent emitted from a small stall, operated by a gentle-looking older man and tucked into the corner of the grounds almost out of sight. You quickly made your way over, forgetting Shouto in your haste.

As you approached, you caught sight of the source of the scent; choco-banana. You must’ve had the stars shining in your eyes as you gazed at the treats because the man chuckled when you caught his eye.

“Why, hello there, young miss.” He greeted. “Would you like some choco-banana?” He was already placing a couple on a plate before you could respond.

“Thank you,” you said as you took the offered plate. You reached a hand towards where your purse would usually be at your side and gasped when you felt nothing but air. Your eyes widened and your heart sank as you remembered you were still in your Hero costume and your purse was miles away back at the agency building. “I’m sorry, sir, but—”

You were interrupted by an arm appearing in front of you, money in hand. You blinked and turned to find Shouto standing there. “Is this enough for two plates, sir?” he asked.

The stall worker eagerly nodded. “Sir, this is more than enough. Just wait a second while I get your change.” Shouto’s raised hand stopped him.

“Keep the change.” He said, picking up his own plate of choco-banana—when did he get that?—and leading you away from the stand towards a group of picnic tables.

“Thank you, Shouto,” you said as you sat down. “That was very kind.”

Your dual-haired partner met your eye, his stare holding the same intensity as always. “There is no need to thank me,” he told you. “If I did not want to pay, I wouldn’t have.”

You gaped at him. “That’s not what I meant—” your words caught in your throat when you saw the corner of his mouth lift into a smile for the second time that day. This little—

“It’s okay, Y/N,” he reassured you. “This is my treat.”

You looked away, no longer able to hold that dreamy, intense gaze of his. “Fine,” you grumbled. “But let me pay next time.” He gave you a look that screamed ‘in your dreams’ but you let it drop for now.

The two of you finished your choco-banana in silence, contently observing your surroundings. You spotted a couple steal a kiss under the cover of darkness provided by an alleyway and watched as a group of children kicked a football around.

Shouto threw away your empty plate for you. When he returned, he asked; “Now what?”

Before you could respond, a loud shriek cut through the evening air. You and Shouto stiffened, immediately on high alert for an attack. Your hands clenched at your sides as you scanned the area for the source of the sound and any indication of an attack. You turned to face the alleyway where the couple were, but they were gone. You and Shouto were back-to-back, scanning the area when suddenly, the group of children who were playing football came rushing towards you, giggling loudly.

“Sunspot! Shouto!” a boy leading the charge hollered as they reached you; about seven to eight children. Where are their parents, you wondered. Shouto turned to stand at your side as the kids came to a stop.

“What is it?” he asked. “Is there danger nearby?” Out of the corner of your eye, you saw his heterochromatic eyes narrow as he awaited a response.

A girl, no more than five, clasped her tiny hands together and stepped forward. She looked at the ground as she spoke, afraid to meet the eyes of two Pro Heroes. “We wan’ yous to play wit’ wus!” she announced.

You bent over, placing your hands on your knees, and looked at the children. “Were you guys the source of the scream we heard a few moments ago?” you softly inquired. The children looked at each other, silently exchanging words before nodding. “Why did you scream?” you questioned.

Another girl stepped forward. She had ribbons in her hair, holding the locks up in matching pigtails. “We wanted to get your attention.” She confessed, looking apologetic. “You didn’t look busy so we thought it would be okay if you guys played with us for a while.”

You sighed and glanced at your partner, gauging his expression before turning back to the children. Shouto addressed the children next. “That was not smart of you, children.” You gaped at him, not expecting him to be so blunt but at the same time, you weren’t surprised. This was Shouto, after all. “You should only scream when you are in danger. Do you understand?” The children nodded. “Now then, what game do you want to play?”

You quickly lost track of time as you and Shouto were dragged around the festival by the children, playing various stall games such as ring tosses and goldfish catching and playing football and catch with others. As the night went on, you had gathered a small army of the local children who followed your every move. You didn’t mind, used to the crowds that typically surrounded you when you went out in public wearing your Hero costume, but this was different—almost special in a way.

You were creating core memories for these children, and that fact warmed your heart. In the years following the War, everyone had worked hard to earn back the public’s faith in Heroes and you were witnessing the fruit of your labor right here in front of you.

You couldn’t remember the last time you had so much fun, running around carefree; as if nothing in the world mattered besides this moment. You almost envied the children for their carefreeness—their innocence—that hadn’t been upturned by the evils of the world. As you watched Shouto play a quick game of football with some of the boys—basking in the cheers and laughter of the youth—you silently vowed that you would do everything in your power, even at the cost of your life, to preserve these children’s innocence.

Eventually, the night got darker and your playful bliss had to come to an end. Parents began to call for their children, and one by one, they left after wrapping you and Shouto in the biggest hugs.

Eventually, only one child remained; the little girl with the pigtails, who you learned is named Mai. She looked up at you with bright, brown eyes full of curiosity and joy. “Are you staying for the fireworks?”

“Fireworks?” you inquired. “I did not know there were fireworks tonight.”

“Neither did I,” Shouto intoned, his voice low.

Mai smiled widely as if she just revealed the secret of the universe to you. “Mm-hmm!” she nodded. “At the end of every festival, fireworks are released into the air! They go BOOM!” She shot her hands outward, mimicking the exploding gunpowder. “It is my favorite part of the festivals! Do you like fireworks, Sunspot?”

You crouched, preferring to be at eye level of children when speaking to them. “Of course I do.” You told her. “Where do you go to watch the fireworks, hun? Do you have a favorite spot where you watch them from?”

“Yup!” she exclaimed, popping the ‘p’. “Usually we all gather on boats offshore to watch them, but we can’t do that because of the storm, so most people are just going to stay in the grounds and watch them. But—” She turned and pointed towards the outskirts of town, where a hill was just barely visible over the buildings. “I also like to go to the top of that hill and watch them!”

You observed the hill. It does look like the best spot if you want a good view, you thought.

“What is the best route to the hill, Miss Mai?” Shouto asked the girl.

Mai giggled, probably due to being asked a question by the No. 1 Hero, holding a hand to her mouth before she gave the two of you directions.

Shouto obtained a pastel blue lawn blanket from a vendor as the two of you made your way out of the festival grounds toward the hill. You picked a spot at the summit, away from others, and Shouto gracefully laid the blanket down where you had pointed. He waited for you to get situated before sitting down himself.

There was a gentle breeze blowing through the air. Down below, the cheers and excited mumblings from adults and children alike slowly filtered up to you and Shouto.

“This was great.” You suddenly announced after several minutes of silence. Shouto turned towards you, silently imploring you to elaborate. “Being able to spend this time with you as regular members of society enjoying a summer festival.” You gazed over to your partner, taking in his facial features—carefully blank, as usual, but there was a hint of something in his eyes but you couldn’t catch exactly what. Your breath hitched when you realized just how radiant he looked in the little light from the town that managed to reach him. “Thank you, Shouto.” For what, you are not sure, but it felt right at the moment.

He started at you for several moments, seemingly processing you and your words. As the minutes passed and his intense gaze remained fixated on you, the more anxious you got. Did I say the wrong thing, you wondered, stomach dropping. Was that the wrong thing to say?

You looked away, breaking the staring contest. “S-sorry.” You stuttered out, embarrassed.

“No.” Shouto suddenly said, surprising you. You hadn’t expected him to say anything, let alone that. You began to turn your head back towards him, but two fingers on your chin brought you eye-to-eye before you could yourself. You stared wide-eyed at the dual-haired man holding your chin. “Do not apologize, Y/N,” he said. “You have nothing to apologize for.” He leaned in. “In fact, I should be the one apologizing—for keeping things to myself.” He continued before you could question him. “I share your sentiments, Y/N. I feel the same way and more about tonight and this time I have shared with you.”

You gapped at him, unable to form words for a moment as you processed his words. Oh my gosh, is he confessing to me right now? “You do?” you eventually gasped out, voice nearly a whisper. This was happening so fast—

“I do,” Shouto confirmed. He inhaled as if in preparation for what he was going to say next. “I have thoroughly enjoyed every second I have spent with you since you became my partner several months ago. I was a fool to not properly identify the emotions I feel whenever I am with you—whenever I think of you—until tonight.” You had stopped breathing sometime during his speech, unable to take in air as you held onto every word that exited that beautiful mouth of his. His hands cupped your face, his eyes admiring every part of your features. “Please forgive me, love, for taking so long to confess, but I am here now, doing so.”

You felt like your heart was about to beat outside your chest as he spoke, mind fogging as you stared at his perfect, plump lips as they moved to form the words of his confession. The two of you stared at each other for several more moments. You mindlessly wondered if you were dreaming.

Shouto chuckled. He ran a hand through your hair, captivated by the way his hand moved through the locks. “You are not,” he softly told you. “This is real.” Your cheeks warmed when you realized you had asked that out loud. “Now, can I kiss you?”

As soon as the words left his mouth, you brought him in for a kiss. The moment your lips connected, a loud BOOM exploded in the sky accompanied by bright red and blue light. The two of you broke the kiss to look up, gazing at the fireworks. You smiled when you realized the two of you had just shared your first kiss, and you did indeed see fireworks when your lips touched. You turned back to Shouto, and by his smirk, you knew he had thought the same thing.

You laughed before bringing him into another kiss.

Fin.

BONUS SCENE:

You felt like you were on cloud nine as the two of you walked along the streets, hand in hand. There was no specific destination in mind; the two of you enjoying the other’s company and this time together. For several hours, the two of you forgot about your Pro Hero duties and the stress and demands of your careers. Neither of you agonized over the report you would have to draw up when you returned to the mainland. If there was a Heaven on Earth, this evening you shared with Shouto was it.

“Let’s purchase a room for the night.”

You hadn’t registered Shouto had spoken right away, too caught up in admiring the neon lights that lit up the front of some restaurants and bars. It took a total of five seconds for your brain to comprehend the words he had spoken, and when it did, the bliss you had felt since your kiss up on the hill came to a sudden, screeching halt as you froze in your tracks.

“W-what!??!!” you exclaimed with a shriek, whipping your head around to the dual-haired male. You rapidly blinked, ensuring you were still awake and not having some crazy dream. “W-why would we do th-that?”

Shouto gave you a puzzled look. “To sleep in, of course.” He stated, tone dead-serious and leaving no room for argument. “What other reason are there for staying in an inn for the night?”

You felt your cheeks heat with amusement and embarrassment as you chuckled nervously. “Never mind!” you chirped. “Let’s go find that room so we can get some sleep.”

You did not, in fact, get any sleep that night.

No plagiarizing, re-uploading, translating, or copying of any kind or on any platform of my writing or inserted into any type of AI generator. Do not recommend my work on TikTok. Do not repost on YouTube.

[mamayan]

★LOVE★

Darling! Hisoka Morow x Yandere! Reader

cw: NSFW • Obsessive/Possessive Themes • Fem! Reader • Noncon turned Dubcon • Yandere Themes • Murder • Emotional Instability • Yandere! Reader • Drug usage • HC • PIV

This is not “reader” inclusive as I’d assume nearly 99.9% of you do not exhibit true yandere traits. This is written with a female yandere in mind. No other physical descriptors will be used, but “reader” will have psychological descriptors and habits which will likely not match the majority. Please keep this in mind while reading. Thank you!

To become so obsessed with a psychotic mass murdering clown magician like Hisoka, you’d need to be a special breed. Harley Quinn style if you will, but incorporating an even more massively unhealthy level of adoration and blindness.

Since Hisoka is a whimsical sociopath and amoral character, it’d likely attract someone that is… surprisingly selfless and mildly antisocial. His attitude and way of life likely trigger feelings of envy and jealousy at first within you. Why does he get to be so carefree? Why can’t you just slaughter your entire place of work when they piss you off?

So starts the morbid curiosity. Who is Hisoka Morow?

You’d see him in passing a time or two, maybe you’d even witness him kill or target an individual in battle. You’d stay undetected by Hisoka. This requires great skill in nen-ability and you’d likely be a pro-Hunter or something along those lines. You’d need to be incredibly powerful and a good strategist to have Hisoka as a darling. Specializing in stealth/tracking/spying would all do you well in aiding to observe stalk Hisoka.

He’d take a life so easily it’d stun you. His lack of remorse after even more. How does he feel so little? Why is he so easily aroused in battle? Why can’t you look away? Rationality will need to take a backseat in this budding crush you have. It won’t bloom into what you call “love” until he does something that speaks to you personally.

It’ll be entirely mundane too.

He’ll do one thing that will capture your heart. Maybe it’s when he spares Gon and Killua. He’d claim it’s because they’ll make worthy opponents later. You’ll see it as something else.

Once your feelings for him are established, it’s impossible to find fault with him anymore. Everything he does is perfect, utterly adorable and fascinating, and he’s a silly kitten who can do no wrong in your mind. His clawed finger nails are proof that the most harm he can do is claw up some curtains.

Hisoka is constantly on the move, traveling often and usually very light. He does have a few spaces he uses more like storage than actual living quarters. This where you spend time when you aren’t observing him. Going through his things, envisioning a future with him, imagining him tied to the bed.

You’ll be delusional but no so much you believe you can have him without force. Wild cats are hard to tame after all, and a superiority complex over Hisoka will begin to develop the longer you watch and learn about him. You’ll likely have dug up all the skeletons of his past. You believe you know him best, who else understands him so well but you?

This dig includes any lovers or even potential lovers. They’re in the way and need to be gotten rid of. You can’t let them ruin him now can you?

Finding all of his past lovers isn’t easy, especially without alerting him to anything suspicious at first. Thankfully, despite his track record of murders, his love life is stale at best. A few hookups when he was younger, no long term relationships, but he does have a notable relationship with a female from the Phantom Troupe.

Machi, a beautiful woman which Hisoka blatantly flirts with. More than the usual too, it holds a level of sexual tension which invokes unparalleled rage inside you. It’s ironically not directed at Machi, but she’ll bear the brunt of it anyway.

Hisoka is given both a sick and delightful surprise when Machi’s severed head is delivered to his hotel suite in a box. A love poem hand written by you in it, but it’s a warning for him too.

It’s a grotesque combination, but it’ll most certainly catch his attention. A bouquet might’ve sufficed too, but Hisoka will now know of your existence. He doesn’t think this is a love note though, he thinks this is revenge. He’ll be angry too, because whether Machi was ever a real love rival or not, she was someone he wanted to fight. His designated prey was caught and killed before he even had a true chance of tasting victory over them. That must mean you are an even better treat.

It’ll drive you wild seeing how desperate he becomes to track you down and find you. He comes close a few times too, but always just out of reach. His real niche laying in combat unlike you. It feels romantic in a sense, and it’ll drive the fantasy further that you two are meant to be together. He’s meant to be yours isn’t he? As you begin leaving even more obvious hints of your presence in his life, he’ll realize it’s not revenge you’re seeking.

He’ll figure out he’s got a perverted little stalker when he finds your cute lace panties left for him to find. No need to mention you’d touched yourself on his bed to the thought of him and came in them. It’ll be fairly obvious from the fact that he hasn’t been to this particular hideout in a while and it’s spotless. No dust. Everything perfect, but he didn’t clean before he left this one. Then he’ll see on the unmade bed, a clear sign of a woman having intruded and marked the area. Strands of your hair. Your scent. Your clothes.

Still, he won’t catch you. He’ll bait you too, and sometimes you wonder if you’ve been caught only to realize he just knows he’s always being watched now. He doesn’t know your exact location or if you actually are there. “I liked your gift… hmm, but it would’ve been a nicer surprise to see you in them~” he’s flirtation and goading. It’ll be difficult to resist him, when he’s seemingly speaking straight at you. You know the moment you reveal yourself though, he’s not going to drop to his knees and offer himself to you. It’ll be a battle on sight. Though the thought of him getting aroused because of fighting you… makes you itch to throw caution to the wind.

Instead you clear any and all traces of your presence for several long months, until Hisoka grows avidly annoyed and then slowly disinterested, moving on to other opponents and amusements. Being in your line of work means a very much endless cash flow, the resources available to keep up with your favorite pass time of just watching him in all his glory. He’s perfection, even as his face twists up into a manic monstrous expression as he slaughters his victims, you see nothing but an angel. Never mind the screams and begging for mercy, isn’t he so cute when he plays a magic trick for them? It’s easy to become overwhelmed with jealously occasionally, but you’re good at being patient and reminding yourself that person isn’t special, Hisoka is just entertaining himself.

It’s also hard to remind yourself you aren’t special either. While it takes a certain sense of superiority over a darling to develop yandere tendencies, you’re also affected by an inferiority complex about the world. This means you’re isolated in how you interact with the world, no close friends or relatives, no real hobbies outside of what assists you with your work, hardly any social interactions that aren’t required. This is what makes Hisoka so fascinating, and it’s also what starts your real downward spiral to depravity.

What makes you truly snap and lose control to your yandere tendencies , is nothing other than Hisoka himself.

He’s coming down from a recent high of a fight in Heaven’s Arena, only showing up due to being challenged as a floor master, but the fight had been surprisingly up to his standards. His opponent was both entertaining and thrilling until their end. He was in a good mood, a very good one, so when a spectator approached him batting their lashes and hinting at spending the night in his suite… he said yes.

That was strike one.

Strike two was the audacity of the piece of shit throwing themself at him. You carefully followed, silent and untraceable as sexual tension began to rise in the elevator all three of you shared. Only they thought it was just them.

Strike three. Wasn’t your presence at least somewhat obvious? It’s highly delusional on your end to become enraged at other’s ignorance to your presence despite your mastery of hiding it. It’s what allowed you to watch Hisoka so long after all, but illogical as it is, you were still pissed. Furious at both of them but now mostly at Hisoka. Who was leaning over them, letting his height and teeth aching sugary tone seduce this common stray off the street like they were his personal favorite. They weren’t. He didn’t have any real favorites. Only toys that were disposable and this was no different but it didn’t matter because he was yours. And it seemed he needed to learn this.

Even Hisoka can be taken off guard, especially with his pants feeling too tight and the piece of ass before him being all to eager to please.

He’s unconscious when you finally reveal yourself. The deafening scream echoing throughout the elevator as it finally reached Hisoka’s designated floor and opening. Unfortunately for the poor soul screaming who was just looking to get laid, you weren’t in the mood to grant them anything less than a brutal death.

“Shut up! Shut up shut up shut up shut shut up!” Your fist broke bone with each strike, until your victim lay unrecognizable and very dead. You’d released your nen, and every nen user in this entire Arena now knows you’re here, all because anger got the best of you.

It didn’t matter, because even with the corpse at your feet, you were still furious.

You took both Hisoka and the body out of the elevator and swiftly worked to clean up the damage and fluids. You didn’t need the Arena fining you again. Hisoka was out cold, but he’s quick to recover so you work on getting him into his suite and bed, working his wrists into nen blocking steel cuffs. He’s spread like a star fish, each limb hooked to the fancy bed posts. You muttered anxiously as you dug around your bag, hands shaking as you pulled out a small leather pouch about the size of your palm.

It might seem overkill, but chaining and drugging ensured your personal safety once he woke up.

Never mind the fact that you could just leave after disposing of the body. Your heart fluttering and cheeks flushing as you looked upon his unconscious body on the bed prevented you from acting within reason. No, you wanted him to see you, if for no other reason than to establish where he was.

Beneath you.

Hiding your presence and that of the corpse, you quickly left the building with Hisoka’s key card to properly rid yourself of the responsibility and allow yourself to fully focus on Hisoka.

Returning was quick and painless, this time not revealing your presence until back in Hisoka’s suite.

His face was angelic while he slept, though his head would likely ache from the powerful blow you landed to the back to get him in this state. You contented yourself with just watching him for the next hour or so, until with no warning, he woke up. It was odd how he didn’t even twitch. Just suddenly aware of his situation and surroundings, alertness to his features immediately. You wished it was a sleepier and cuter wake up, but you still found it adorable how on guard he was instantly.

Those lovely gold orbs landed on you and narrowed, despite his sly smile. He might appear relaxed and languid for someone chained up and hardly able to move their body due to relaxants circulating their system, but you knew he was furious. Hisoka, as much as he loves playing with others, hates being played with. You stayed silent, letting him observe and calculate, allowing him time to run through his options and every plausible scenario.

“Well… good morning Ms. Stalker.” His airy words sent visible shivers down your spine, his eyes and focus, for the first time entirely on you. He also seemed to note your reaction, his smile sharp and predatory. “Oh? You like the nickname? Bad girl… don’t you know not to play with magic?” He tested his restraints, with surprisingly more strength than you thought he’d have after injecting him. He’d require another dose then. You were quick to work on that, his eyes tracking your movements and realizing your objective.

“Not even going to let me play?” He didn’t resist as you sterilized his arm before injecting him with a fourth dose. Three should’ve been enough to tranquilize an elephant but Hisoka wasn’t a normal human. He flexed his hands and twisted his wrists, copying the same with his feet and ankles. The cuffs were made specifically for him. You’d kindly taken off his shoes and socks, but his shirt and pants remained on. You felt your throat constrict and thighs clench at the thought of him naked. You’d already seen it a multitude of times but he hadn’t known you did. Watching him shower and change so shamelessly.

“You look ready to eat me. Is that what this is dear? You got jealous when I brought another up here?” His nickname for you threw you off, your eyes widening and meeting his teasing gaze. He looked sinfully beautiful like this, at your mercy yet still so him. You licked your lips, feeling mildly nervous now that you were about to speak to him. This was too good an opportunity to pass up though.

“Yes,” he paused when you finally answered, “I…I was very jealous.” Your hands gripped the bottom of your shirt, the material bunching as the earlier annoyance was brought back to your attention. You grimaced, “This wasn’t really how I intended for you to meet me for the first.”

“Oh? But we’re here nonetheless aren’t we?” His tone was a bit snarky, but he was correct. What did you do now? Make every little fantasy you had come true?

“How about this, yes? You take these off and I give you a painless death. Isn’t that nice of me?” His words have your eyes snapping up to his face, his words not matching his sweet expression. He wanted to kill you? Not even fight? You frowned, a low boiling of rage in the pit of your stomach.

“You think you hold any power here?” You sneered back at him, walking to look down at his sorry figure chained up and at your mercy. He was being a brat. You backhanded him swiftly, his head cracking to the side at the force and momentum. His pale skin already reddening as a small trail of blood tricked down his chin. His gaze was on fire as he turned back to look up at you. Defiant and piercing, but his smile never wavered. “How about this, Hisoka, you stay right where you are, and maybe I’ll be nice and let you finish tonight.” His eyes widened, a small moment of shock taking over his features but he quickly schooled them again.

You began undressing swift, throwing your clothes to the floor until you were only in your underwear. Your chest heaved, nipples tightening under the cool air of the room and Hisoka’s gaze. You couldn’t place his expression exactly, a combination of desire and rage most likely. You climbed atop the bed and thus him, knees on either side of his hips as you made light work of his shirt. Shredding the garment and tossing it to join your clothes. His pants were next, now both of you almost completely naked and staring at one another.

“Is this your idea of a good time Ms. Stalker? Tying up innocent magicians and having your way with them?” You laugh at this sentence, because it was silly to think too much about. He was still being light and teasing but he was exuding a little bit of bloodlust.

“No Hisoka, my idea of a good time is just you in general.” You placed a cold hand on his abdomen, sliding it up gently until it reached his throat. “Watching you, hearing you, smelling you…” your eyes trailed up his naked torso to his lips for a moment, before connecting your gazes. “This is your fault really. I didn’t ask to be haunted by you, I didn’t ask to feel like this, I didn’t ask to want someone so badly I’d gladly watch this word burn if it meant you’d be entirely mine.” It was a deeply disturbing confession. You sat down, right over his erection where you could grind your pussy against him and elicit a beautiful hiss of pleasure and pain from him. “I can’t, oh, I can’t decide if I want to own you or be you really,” you panted, beginning a slow rock of your hips as your arousal soared. The object of all your affection beneath you, looking so much like a cat being bathed it brought a small smile to your lips. This was all turning you on, and he seemed to also be enjoying himself somewhat.

“I very much would love to humor you dear, but I really do recommend you remove these.” He dropped his facade, his expression turning dark as he realized how unlikely you were to release him. You were clearly deranged, maybe more so than himself. He tugged against his chains, the rattling echoing around the room but it only served to make you amused. Despite his words, his hips had begun to lightly buck up into you now. Both of your underwear soaked through, a combination of your slick and his precum. His voice and tone sent your hormones flying to cloud nine, your face starting to look intoxicated as you gazed down at him with obsession.

“You say you want them off but do you really want this to end? I could just… leave you here. All night. Maybe I’ll come back just to make sure you, haah, stay hard?” You were panting and a little sweaty, breasts heaving as you became more intoxicated by the moment and him. You looked spelled bound and he looked downright menacing. Of course, because out of all things, Hisoka likes control. His flirtatious attitude can not be mistaken as submissive, but here you were forcing him into such a role. Threatening him with a punishment if he didn’t behave like a dog.

It made him want to bite you like one.

“Pretty Ms. Stalker could’ve told me she wanted her little pussy filled, no need to go to such lengths-tss!” He flinched when you finally fished his cock free, your soft cool hand a striking contrast to his pulsing hot shaft.

“You’re so pretty Hisoka.” You were lost to your own fantasies, not really registering his words anymore. He realized it quickly as you focused all your attention on his leaking cock, impressed by the size and girth. It would hurt, taking him, but the thought of stretching around him was driving you wild.

But first… you dropped your chest low and opened your mouth. Your tongue had him groaning low, the sound of his teeth grinding together had you even wetter than before. You licked from base to tip, slow and sensual. He tasted sweet. Not salty or bitter like you imagined and it had you quickly and messily taking him into your mouth.

For all you were, you weren’t experienced. This was your first blowjob but you prayed not your last, because as you choked and gagged to take more him, he was losing it himself. What you lacked in experience and skill, you were making up for in enthusiasm and pure need to please. Observing his reactions as you let his tip finally sink into your throat even as tears pricked your eyes and fell down your cheeks. It burned and ached, but you pushed the pain down as you watched him. He finally gave in and kept your gaze as you worked to make him cum, sucking and taking him as deep into your throat as you could. You were making an absolute mess of his cock and balls, slobbering all over him. It was erotic and truly enticing, and the only indication he was close was the twitch of his lip and his hips trying to make you take even more of him.

You tried to get all of him in your throat when he came, but you failed by an inch or so. You stayed still as his hot cum coated your throat and mouth, moaning at his musky sweet flavor and making sure to suck and milk him for any leftover until he was choking on his own moans for you.

You made sure to clean him up nicely, licking and making sure even his balls weren’t missed. When you finally pulled back to look at him, you nearly passed out at the sight.

He was slightly sweaty, breathing a little heavier with half lidded eyes glaring and grinning viciously at you. His cheeks flushed, the left slightly bruised from your earlier hit. His lips red and bitten, a bit of blood still leftover on his chin. He looked gorgeous. You couldn’t be blamed when you were stumbling off the bed to grab your camera from your bag. No need to turn the flash off since he knows of your presence now.

He scowls as you snap his picture, looking beautiful and ruined just for you.

“I- sorry- I just need this okay?” You set the camera down, eager to return and continue touching him and exploring.

He snorted, looking at you in disbelief with mild amusement. “Is that so? You needed to photograph me naked?”

“What? No. I have lots of those already. I wanted one of your face after I made you cum.” He seemed flabbergasted at your answer, but you couldn’t help your eager hands from cupping his cheeks and leaned down over his face. “You’re just so pretty I can’t help it.” You told him honestly, his expression relaxing into something neutral as he observes you. Fine by you, as you begin kissing his face, hair, cheek you hit and then his neck. You lick and suck over his pulse, enjoying the masculine groan as you mark him up and lick his sweat. You’re trembling as you wiggle down to his chest, playing with his nipples. Swirling your tongue elicits the best response, his back arching lightly and proving your theory that his nipples are sensitive.

His hardening cock beneath you all the proof you need, your own nipples pebbled and aching as you drag your chest against his while you work.

When he bucks up again underneath you, you finally release his nipple with a pop. Looking at his tossed and adorably fucked appearance, you shiver. His hair messy from throwing his head into the pillows. You licked your lips, finally clumsily trying to get out of your underwear but failing because of your position. With a huff of annoyance you just tore them off, finally completely naked and slightly embarrassed by his stare.

It hardly mattered if he liked what he saw, you weren’t so far gone that you thought you looked anything like his earlier willing catch which you’d crushed- “Pretty thing aren’t you?” You paused your internal rambling when he spoke. His voice low and husky, not as flirtatious and teasing like his usual tone. You’d never heard him use this voice before, you eyes meeting his with curiosity.

He chuckled, but his bloodlust from earlier was gone like it had never happened, “What’s wrong? You were so eager just a moment ago, don’t tell me you’re shy now? Is Ms. Stalker a virgin?”

His goading voice was back, covering up his earlier tone like it’d been a mistake. Though you were surprised he hit the nail on the head. You were a virgin. Not because you lacked people willing to fuck you, but because you lacked interpersonal skills to have a normal relationship. Intimacy terrified you before you’d fallen for Hisoka, but after it was all you seemed to want. To touch him, feel him, make him feel good. You wanted him desperately.

“I won’t be much longer.” You looked away and solidified your resolve as you moved to hover above him again, your dripping cunt begging to be filled. You balanced using one hand on his hip, the other gripping his once more hard cock and lining him up with your entrance. You let his tip brush through your sensitive folds as you shakily released a breath. You took one small peak at his face, his eyes watching you like how a hawk might watch it’s prey.

You let his tip breach your entrance, no surprise that it stung. You didn’t prep yourself at all, and though you were wet enough, you wished you’d thought to carry a little lube in case this scenario ever occurred. It didn’t matter though because even if it hurt you were being connected to him and it made your chest swell with pride and happiness.

“Fuck, you’re tight- ah” he threw his head back and grit his teeth again, your gummy walls simultaneously sucking him in and pushing him out. It had him close already embarrassingly enough. The pleasure and pain mind numbing.

You’d only taken half of him but it was leaving you breathless, “m’trying” you could only gasp as you struggled to push more of him in, tears pricking your eyes once more as the pure stretch of his cock inside you was turning your brain off. It hurt but it felt good too.

“If you take these off, I’ll happily finish the job you’ve started dear~” Despite his tone, his face looked just as aroused and strained as your own. It was tempting, but deep down you really didn’t trust him. It came from knowing him that you didn’t trust him in the least. You shook your head, denying his prompting. His laugh is dark, even as his hips surge up to force another few inches into you. You cry out, bracing against his chest as you fall forward a bit. He does it again, sinking into you until finally you feel your hips meet and his tip kiss deeply into your cervix. You lay panting against his chest for a moment as his cock pulses inside you, your body pathetically struggling to adjust to his size.

“Take them off while I’m being nice.” He’s not asking, but still you shake your head and push yourself up, moaning as he sinks even deeper. Your hips take on an unsteady rhythm, testing the depth that feels the best but his hips throw you off each time you find the perfect angle. The stretch and friction drive you wild, your mind numbing to the pain and pleasure as you feel the coil inside you close to snapping.

“Feels good~” your moaning loudly, face fucked out and teary eyes locking with Hisoka’s. His eyes are burning, face scrunched up in frustration because your pace isn’t quite fast enough, nor is he hitting as deep as he’d like. His chains clink against the steel posts, you’re too distracted though to pay attention as you desperately work your hips towards your finish, bouncing on his dick. “M’gonna cum Hisoka” your deliriously close, the coil right about to snap-

When his chains do first.

“Huh,” You only get a split second to panic before he’s on you, breaking each steel bedpost and freeing his movement up again. His cuffs are still secured for a second but it’s meaningless a moment later when they shatter. His nen stored up enough to cancel their purpose of restraining him despite how much you’d paid that specialist who guaranteed no one could get out of them. Never mind that he should still be drugged up enough to he struggling to move at all.

You find your positions switched, your back hitting the mattress as you gaze up into his eyes now.

It’s silent for a moment, save your own pounding heart and icy fear now filling your veins. He just… looks at you. His face blank, eyes calculating but just when you decide it’s best to fight than let him slaughter you like this, he laughs.

Not like normal. This is borderline hysterical laughter, his hand wrapping around his torso as he howls with laughter.

Before you can activate your ability, he’s got a hand wrapped around your throat and squeezing just enough to warn you. “Did you think this would all just work out how you wanted dear?” You were scared, that was true, but as he nudged your thighs apart and dragged his still hard cock through your folds teasingly, you realized you were also horrifically aroused too.

All of your fantasies had you on top, because you didn’t trust him not to kill you if he was, if he even wanted to willingly touch you at all.

“Look at you~ poor thing,” he’s mockingly sweet as he leans over you, long tongue coming out to lick your tears off your cheek. As he leaned back, you truly didn’t expect his hand to leave your neck and slap you across the face. The sting follows after his hit lands, but it shocks you silly more than it actually hurts. You don’t have too long to think before he’s shoving himself back in, and your too far gone to stop the orgasm that slams into you. “Wait!” It too late even as you cry out, hands desperately grabbing on to something to anchor you. Him.

He hisses, face vicious as he stares down at you, “Did you really just cum?” His voice somewhat incredulous as he feels you twitch and writhe beneath him. He stayed still, letting you shakily come down from your high before he’s rocking into you.

Then he’s fucking you just how he likes. Hands gripping your hips in a death grip as he slams himself into your overstimulated cunt over and over. He leaves you mewling and fucked stupid beneath him as he mercilessly thrusts into you like a rag doll. You can’t keep up. Can hardly speak besides useless babbling, only making him laugh and sarcastically mock you for it.

“What’s wrong dear? Isn’t this what you wanted? Am I just so deep inside you~?” Cooing as you nod and cry harder.

It’s when he kisses you that you cum again. He tastes like bubblegum and you’re gone, creaming his cock as his tongue tangled with you own messily. It all feels too good, your arms wrapping around his neck, legs around his waist, while you just struggle to take it. His tip pounding away in a spot that has you gasping and sobbing below him, because despite everything, this is the most pleasure you’d ever felt. It was disorienting and left you mildly numb, his sharp claws trailing down your chest softly to settle his thumb over your clit and press until you came again.

This one was slightly painful, your muscles constricting so hard Hisoka finally fell over the edge himself. His moans so pretty, soft and deep as his hips still move despite him emptying himself inside you.

He recovers first, staring down at the pretty thing in his arms struggling to catch her breath.

You’d given quite the headache for a while now, but tonight really took everything up a notch. You certainly weren’t halfhearted, something of which he respected. You weren’t a weak thing either, his thrusts harsh enough to break a normal human’s hips, but you just looked fucked stupid. It was cruel of him to be so rough, but then again you’d really brought it on yourself hadn’t you?

You’d brought all this onto yourself, and whatever happened in the future too.

Because now he was a little hooked as well, and you were just too cute and interesting to leave alone now that he’s tasted you. Had you first.

He easily reached over to snag your camera, switching it on and snapping a picture of you still shaking and twitching with his cock still buried inside you and beginning to grow hard again.

Realization dawned on you, but even as you tried to move and get away from him, he had your wrist locked above your head to stop that nonsense.

“Nu-uh dear, I’m not finished. Not even a little.” His lustful gaze and sadistic smirk had you looking like a frightened animal, but it only served to rile him up further.

It’s after all, your fault for loving someone like him, right?

It’s important to note that once Hisoka becomes interested, he treasures it. But something he treasures one day can become trash the next… until you.

Hisoka is surprisingly a willing darling. Don’t think this reverses any roles, he’s not submissive to you in the slightest. He acts like a total brat but he’s dominant through and through, don’t expect to ride him unless he’s got full control to just fuck up into you.

He’s needier than you’d expect too. Not just with sex, that’s constant, but also in just having your company. He likes when you talk to him, interact with him, don’t expect to go back into observing from the sidelines. He’s all to happy to give you front row seats.

He’s just as jealous as you are, but he’ll purposely play into your jealousy by flirting with other women to rile you up. He just likes how you look enraged, finds it cute. If you do the same, he’ll make that individual sit tied to a chair while he fucks you in front of them until you can’t even apologize anymore. Then he’ll kill them. He welcomes the same treatment. You get a bit shy acting it out.

Bonnie and Clyde duo!

He’s not a yandere, though he gets jealous, he’s just a psychopath in general. He’ll still be Hisoka no matter what. While you can interact normally with others when necessary, your fixation on him will remain an outlier. Hisoka is just trash to everyone, and surprisingly decent to you. By your low standards.

He likes ice-cream and ice-cream dates. He’s an ice-cream date man.

Illumi doesn’t understand your relationship but respects your devotion. Wonders why more women can’t be like you. Hisoka likes that his friend is envious of what he has.

Enjoy your darling, he’s frustrating and difficult but all yours now!

Dividers by @benkeibear

[showtoonzfan]

Helluva Boss and Hazbin Hotel is concerningly a trojan horse of white feminism. White feminism identifies with white patriarchy and strives to find a place of power within it, whether or not they acknowledge white men would never see them as equals. This type of feminism enforces the same patriarchal values that hold them down.

On both shows, the male characters are favored, the actions of the shitty male characters are justified to be right and that they are to be sympathized with little to no regard to their victims that are made to be at fault for being being imperfect at reacting at the abuse they receive.

And what is most perplexing to me as an outsider, is that Medrano is supposed to be a victim of abuse by some guy, and yet identifies and upholds her abusive male characters. In her attempt to humanize them, she disregards the weight of their actions. Her actions with her ex-employees and ex-friends show that the victim became the abuser to regain a sense of power, which is typically what white feminism is.

I know I shouldn't be psycho-analyzing her as a distant observer, but I'm tired of people mystifying a suffering deer with fungal-mutated horns and not thinking there's something wrong with it and that it needs help.

No you’re completely right. Vivienne has shown for many years that she isn’t a girls girl. On the outside she’s tried to paint herself as pro feminism and that she cares about other women, when in reality she’s transphobic, has put other women down, and has slut shamed them in her work. She’s basically that obnoxious girl in middle school that acts like she’s a girls girl but in reality is constantly and desperately seeking male validation, like how she once made a tweet questioning why she hasn’t been acknowledged for being a famous female content creator in a world dominated by men even though there were many other female content creators before her that were already rising to the top. I never came out of watching or reading something she made and thought “she hates men”, cause she doesn’t. She hates women and it shows in how she writes them and uses them. Her males are allowed to be 3 dimensional yet 90% of her females are one note. Viv also caters to the male audience who lusts over her female characters and I don’t need to explain that one.

Meanwhile she hasn’t got a single favorite or popular female character. There’s a reason why for years she’s said her favorites are Alastor and Angel and how she loves writing Adam, hell…she confirmed Adam is her favorite HH character. She doesn’t care about her female characters and only her males, whom she can find enjoyment in, either woobifying or sexualizing them. I think it kinda tells you something when you learn that Val is supposed to be based on her abuser yet she constantly likes tweets by Val apologists and sexy/silly fanart of him.

Meanwhile (as everyone has been saying), her content is for white queers/white fujoshi’s, no one else. She tries so hard for some reason to act like she’s new and progressive, challenging the world that’s been dominated by white people and their bland perspectives, but she hasn’t really added anything new to the table, and the way her fandom (and she herself at this point) treats black people is fucking nuts.

[whipped-for-kpop-fics]

Naive - L.C

💡Who: Lee Chan (Seventeen) x female reader 💡What: Best friends to ??? Angst. Thriller. Soft moments. Dark themes (please check warnings). 18+ 💡Word count: 11.5k 💡Warnings: Profanity. Stalking. Nonconsensual voyeurism. Nonconsensual photos. Cheating. Major injury (Not Chan or reader). Mentions of a car accident. Mentions of sexual harassment. Mentions of panic attacks and almost panic attacks. No smut, but suggestive content, some dirty talk and mentions of sexual acts. Very morally dark character. Drugging. Kidnapping. Restraints. Chan calls reader angel a lot (mostly because I don’t wanna use y/n), and baby in the second half.

Summary: Breakups are always painful, but at least you have your best friend by your side to make everything better. Right?

Minors do NOT interact, which means reblogging and/or commenting on this story. I WILL block any account that interacts without an age indicator in their bio.

-2024 Masterlist-

A/N- I know nothing about flower meanings, it all came straight from Wikipedia so don't blame me for inaccurate meanings, it's just a fic.

“It’s okay, he’s in the past, he’s not worth your tears,” your best friend soothes as you cry into his chest for the third night in a row.

“I-I should’ve li-listened to you,” you sob, gripping his t-shirt tighter and curling up smaller.

“It doesn’t matter now; what matters is you ended it and never have to deal with that asshole again.”

“A-asshole is too kind.”

Chan chuckles and tilts his head against the top of your head yet says nothing more and simply continues to hold you until you run out of tears for your cheating, pervert of an ex-boyfriend. Proving once again that Lee Chan is the only man you can ever trust to be good and honest.

Over a year ago, you met Lee Chan while in the gardening section of the bookstore. It was a cliché romcom moment where you both reached for the same book and your hands met before your eyes did. He smiled at you with a soft little chuckle and said something like “guess we both want to know what Victorian people thought flowers meant”, which somehow led to you both buying a copy of the book on the Victorian language of flowers to take to the nearby coffee shop with the intention of reading side by side. Though very little reading happened, and you found yourself sitting there with Chan for hours; laughing and talking as if you’ve known one another for years. It was like he was made to be the other half of you, designed with only you in mind.

At first, you thought maybe it was true; that Chan was your romantic soulmate. But you were seeing someone else at the time and pushed the thought of Chan being anything but platonic entirely out of your mind.

It’s a year and multiple failed relationships later, while you’re out shopping on a rare day off, that something changes.

“What do you think of this one?” Chan asks, drawing your attention to where he’s a few racks away donned in the black, leather biker jacket he just found on the men’s sale rack.

“Oh,” you murmur, suddenly hit with the realisation that your best friend is ridiculously attractive.

It’s not that you’ve ever thought Chan is ugly; in fact, you first paid attention to him in the bookstore past a glance because of how handsome he is. But that was over a year ago and your thoughts have never moved on from considering him the same kind of beautiful as you would a piece of art that you see in a store, yet easily move on past without looking back.

Yet now, you’ve noticed and suddenly can’t draw your eyes away from him.

“Hello?” Chan laughs, waving his arms to bring you back to reality when you do nothing more than stare at him for almost a full minute. “You alright? Getting hungry?” He pouts at you teasingly. “Does the baby need num nums?”

“I hate it when you say that” you remind and stick your middle finger up at him, making him laugh while you turn back to the sale rack you had been looking through.

“I know, why do you think I say it?” He cackles and bounces over to prod you and gain your attention back. “You didn’t say what you think? Do I look sexy?” He wiggles his eyebrows at you while posing in the jacket. “Should I get it?”

“Yeah,” you answer with a nod after taking his body in once more and turning away.

“Was that yes to getting it, or that I look sexy?” He murmurs from suddenly behind you with his mouth right by your ear. You jolt in surprise having not heard him approach, then turn to whack his arm while he cracks up laughing. “You think I’m sexyyy!” He sings loudly, just to annoy you.

“Why are we best friends again?”

“I took pity on you and your bad taste in men.” He definitely deserves the hit this time, even if he’s right.

Ever since you’ve known Chan, you’ve had nothing but terrible luck with picking men to date. You always think they’re okay at first, but then the red flags start popping up and begin waving manically in the hot air spewing from their mouths.

You really thought you had run out of bad luck and finally picked a good one with your ex. He was kind and endlessly attractive; a hard worker, yet always made time for fun and relaxation; and his parents loved you.

It lasted a whole seven months before you found another woman’s underwear in his car, and you realised you should’ve listened to Chan’s gut feeling about Kyle from the start. Finding a stack of polaroids of various women getting changed when you were emptying his apartment of your belongings that same night only made the heartache worse. Not only did he cheat on you, but he also likes to take photos of unsuspecting women through windows and cracked doors.

Upon turning your back on him three weeks ago, you decided to give up on men and always listen to Chan’s gut instincts from now on.

You don’t need a boyfriend; you just need your best friend.

Just when you’re about to leave your apartment building to meet with Chan for lunch one day, you come face to face with your ex. He looks, frankly put, like shit. He used to be so well put together, never to an obsessive degree but he was always well rested and tidy, but now he looks like he hasn’t slept or eaten in at least two days with his hair sticking up a little as if he’s been running his hands through it repeatedly. He’s still wearing nice clothes, but they’re creased, and his shoes aren’t even properly tied.

“What are you doing here?” You hiss while glaring at the man and trying to step past him, but he gets in your path with his hands held up placatingly; he even doesn’t attempt to touch you or get in your personal space.

Vaguely, you think how weird it is of him to respect that boundary yet have polaroids of you half naked in the changing room at your gym. A completely separate gym to the one he frequents too, which somehow makes it even worse; that he went so far out of his way to take the photos you never consented to.

“I just want to talk to you, please? Just a few minutes and I’ll go, and you’ll never see me again,” he pleads. The genuine desperation in his eyes makes you relent and nod. “Can we go somewhere a little less public? I’m not asking to go somewhere isolated, just not the middle of the building lobby.”

Again, you relent and move to the side of the lobby out of the light foot traffic; still perfectly in sight of others yet far enough away to have a private conversation.

“Thank you,” he breathes out gratefully and relaxes a little as you lean one shoulder against the wall with your arms crossed over your chest.

“What is it? I’m going to be late to meet Chan.”

“Right, how is he?”

“Good, it’s Chan. He’s always good.” The words are a little pointed, designed to hurt, and the way his features flinch at the jab sends a little surge of satisfaction into you. Though there’s something in you aching at that same hurt in his eyes; it looks too real.

“Yeah, he’s a good guy,” he agrees softly, and you hum. “So uh, I just…I can’t stop thinking about what happened.”

“Cheating on me or taking photos of women without their consent?” You question, glaring again at the reminder of why you want nothing to do with this man before you. This pathetic, sad eyed, mess of a man.

It’s funny how far he’s fallen in so little time. Strange how a man who cheated on you in the backseat of the same car he often pulled you into with shared giggles, can break so much at being called out on his misdeeds.

You really thought he would just move on to the next conquest and forget all about you for good, just like he did while with the other woman. Or women. You never asked how many there were.

Yet the man before you doesn’t seem to have moved on at all.

“I didn’t do either of those things,” he repeats the words he had said to you a little over a month ago. You didn’t believe him then; you were so full of anger and betrayal as you tried to cradle the pieces of your shattered heart and hoped he hadn’t stolen any of the pieces leaving you unable to stitch it back together again.

Now that you’ve let go of most of your anger and Chan has helped you in putting the pieces back together to the point that your heart is almost whole and healing, you can see through the pain and tears and notice that this man in front of you looks genuine. He’s looking at you without any attempt to look aside or shrink away. He isn’t hiding.

“I found underwear in your car Kyle,” you point out, holding your ground even if you suddenly realise that something here doesn’t feel right. “And those photos in your apartment.”

“I know, I know, and I’ve been trying to figure out how the fuck they got there because it wasn’t me.”

“You live alone and don’t share your car.”

“I know!” He exclaims, hands flying up in frustration, though it doesn’t feel like it’s aimed at you, especially as he steps back to make certain that he doesn’t accidentally hit you. Kyle’s always been considerate like that; always made sure to give you a wide berth when he flung his arms around in play or frustration. But that doesn’t mean he can’t be a cheating pervert. A man can be against physically harming his partner and still betray their trust so deeply.

“Then only you could’ve put them there.”

“No, no, I didn’t though,” he steps closer while lifting his hands between you, though he brings them to his own chest instead of touching you. “Look me in the eye and tell me I have ever done a thing to make you think I would cheat on you or take photos without consent. I never even asked you for pictures; you were the one who offered and asked if you could send me pictures months into our relationship.”

The thing is, he’s right. Although you did have sex regularly and he would send you dirty texts when he was in the mood, Kyle never asked for nudes. You had to be the one to bring it up and ask if he was against that kind of thing.

Now that he brings it up, you can vividly recall him telling you that does enjoy nudes and would certainly enjoy seeing photos of you like that, but he also knows how dangerous they can be to send and receive because of hacking, losing phones or breaking up. He had been so genuine about it and triple checked that you were comfortable with it entirely before giving you consent to send him photos whenever you wanted.

“You had those polaroids, you didn’t need me to send you any,” you reason in a mumble. You don’t even know if you believe what you’re saying at this point, or if you’re just trying to explain the behaviour away. Something isn’t sitting right in you.

“Why would I want polaroids of random women I don’t even know when I have you?” He asks, eyes silently begging you to understand.

“There were photos of me too,” you answer.

“What?” He frowns confusedly. “I didn’t see those, just the top ones before you took them all away.”

“You know I was in there, at the gym changing rooms.”

“I’ve never been anywhere near your gym!” He puts his face in his hands. “I don’t understand what the fuck is going on. I swear I have never been to your gym.” He looks at you imploringly as his hands drop. “And you know I keep my car clean, there’s no way I would’ve failed to notice that underwear; so if I did cheat on you, do you really think I’d miss the evidence and leave them somewhere you’d see them?”

You open your mouth to retort automatically, only to realise there isn’t a single word ready to roll off your tongue. He’s making far too much sense and that doesn’t make sense.

He cheated on you. He’s a pervert who takes photos of unsuspecting women in vulnerable situations. He’s a terrible person.

At least, you thought he was.

Maybe Chan is right and you’re just naïve when faced with a handsome man giving you big puppy dog eyes.

“I need to go,” you decide after a few long moments of trying to form some kind of reaction other than staring at him with furrowed brows. “Chan’s waiting.”

“Right,” Kyle lets out a disappointed sigh, yet nods resignedly and steps back as if giving you space to leave. He hadn’t been in your way in the first place but it’s a silent sign that he won’t try to stop you. “I guess I can’t say anything else to convince you that I didn’t do those things, and I never would. I…I wanted to marry you, you know?”

“What?” You whisper in shock, eyebrows lifting as your eyes turn wide. “Marry me?”

“Yeah,” he lets out a soft, humourless laugh and runs one hand through his hair while looking aside, a shy flush creeping onto his neck and ears. “I was in love with you.”

“You were?”

“Yeah, well, no, actually, that’s a lie.” He looks at you and catches the way your face falls into a frown hearing him admitting to lying to your face like that. “I’m still so fucking in love with you that I can’t function properly knowing you hate me. I’m not asking you to come back to me; I know that won’t happen. I’m just…asking you to really think about it, about us, and me. I never lied to you, never showed you a false me. You know me better than anyone else. Do you really believe I did those things?”

“What took you so long?” Chan pouts at you when you sit down in your usual seat opposite him at your usual table in your usual café. “Angel?”

“Uh, so Kyle was at my apartment,” you inform, picking up your mug that’s been waiting for you for ten minutes already thanks to Chan always ordering for you both. Usually you arrive minutes before your food and drinks arrive, but today you’re late for the first time.

“What?” Chan’s face drops so drastically it throws you off for a second. You’ve never seen such a dark expression on him; you’ve never seen him so entirely void of any light. He doesn’t look like your best friend. “Your apartment? Did he force himself in? Did he hurt you?”

“No, no, I meant the lobby and no, he’s never hurt me. He wouldn’t do that.”

“He cheated on you, took fucking creeper shots of you in your gym and you think he’s above putting his hands on you?” He scoffs, shaking his head a little and pushes the salt across the table to you. You hadn’t asked for it, but you will before you start eating.

He’s always doing thoughtful little things like that for you, but you’ve never really noticed it until the last weeks. Silently noticing what you need and giving it to you with a smile.

But he’s not smiling now. He looks concerned now, rounded eyes locked on you and head tilted down a little as he frowns, almost looking at you through his eyelashes. “I don’t want to be mean or anything, but he fooled you before, angel, he’s clearly trying to do it again. I don’t know what he said to you, but you’ve got that lost look you get when you don’t know what to do.”

“He made good points, Channie,” you reply as you salt your fries before putting the shaker down. Chan doesn’t even look at it past a quick glance before sliding it back to its home out of the way.

“What good points could he have for cheating on you?”

“He said he didn’t do it-” Chan sighs heavily, cutting you off.

“Angel, he said that before, remember? Why do you suddenly believe that piece of shit?”

“Because…he looked honest.”

Chan stares at you for a moment before he sighs and reaches over to hold your hands. “I say this with all the love in me, but you’re not the best judge of character, angel. You’re naïve, innocent. I love that you see the good in the world and everyone, really, I fucking love it; it’s really sweet and cute. But it’s going to get you hurt all over again if you let him fool you like this.”

You look down at your hands in Chan’s, then back up at his face. His gaze is entirely open; big eyes and soft, naturally pouting lips. Your heart skips a beat.

You look away while nodding in understanding, silently telling him that you’re listening to him as you free your hands so that you can pick up your fork.

“Good, I really don’t want to see you hurt again like that. It broke my heart,” Chan says, relaxing as he picks up his own fork to stab too many fries onto the prongs, which he then points at you. “If you break my heart again like that, I’m stealing your TV.”

“My TV?” You sputter in surprise before laughing. Chan grins around the too many fries in his mouth and nods. “You’re ridiculous.”

“You love me though,” he sings around his mouthful while stabbing more fries.

Even with the view of his partially chewed food in his mouth, you can’t really deny it.

“No! Stop it!” You giggle while trying to block Chan from entering your kitchen behind you. “It’s not ready!”

“Just tell me what you’re doing!” He replies, laughing along with you as he tries to dart around you.

“Not yet! Just wait, you impatient shit!”

“No!” He wraps his arms around your waist to pull you away from the doorway and spin you both, so his back is to the kitchen now instead of yours. “Ha!”

“No!” You gasp and reach out, grabbing fistfuls of his t-shirt and in a panic, you yank him closer harshly, unintentionally making him stumble into you.

“Shit, are you okay?” He worries once you’re both steady and he’s holding your upper arms to nudge you back just enough that he can look at your face. You’re frowning, though he can only see your furrowed eyebrows thanks to your hand being over most of the bottom half of your face to cup your nose as his shoulder had collided with it. “Oh, did I hurt you?”

“Asshole,” you murmur while nodding, even if it doesn’t hurt that much; you just honestly like being doted on by your best friend to the extent that you are willing to play up minor injuries to gain his gentle touch and attention.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to,” he apologises, frowning at you as he carefully tugs your hand down. “Let Doctor Channie see.”

“You’d be a terrible doctor,” you reply, moving your hand down to let him cup your face so that he can tilt your head into the light coming in through the windows and see your features better.

“What? I’d be great!” He defends, pouting at you offendedly.

“You thought the uvula is what you pee from.”

“It’s not my fault!” He blushes a little at the reminder of his innocent mix up. “Nobody told me that dangly thing isn’t tonsils! And the pee pipe thingy starts with a U too!”

“Urethra.”

“Exactly, they’re so similar! They should name them differently. Anyway, that doesn’t mean anything, I’d still be a good doctor.”

“Yeah, until you try to catheter someone’s throat.” His expression turns unimpressed, and you can’t help but giggle. He rolls his eyes as his lips turn up into a smile.

“You’re lucky you’re cute,” he murmurs, turning his attention back to your slightly red nose.

“Mm, so what’s the verdict doc?” You tease, poking at his stomach and trying not to focus on the physical reminder that your best friend has abs under his baggy clothes.

“I think you’ll be okay with the right treatment.”

“And what treatment is that?”

“The best thing for a boo-boo,” he replies seriously, and then visibly nearly breaks into a laugh at the almost glare you land on him. “What?”

“I’m not a baby.”

“Yes you are. My baby,” he coos and taps his thumbs to your cheeks. You hope he doesn’t see or feel the way they warm at his words. “I specialise in baby angels, I know this.”

“You’re seriously ridiculous.”

“Mm, so, are you consenting to Doctor Channie’s effective boo-boo treatment?”

You raise an eyebrow at him. “You haven’t told me what it is yet.”

“You know what the treatment for a boo-boo is, angel,” he chuckles and tilts forward to press a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “Like that.”

“I didn’t consent to that treatment, I can sue you,” you mumble, trying to distract from the growing pink on your cheeks. Chan’s eyes glide over your features, lips turning up into a soft smile. “Stop smiling at me like that!” You whine, slapping his waist so gently that it can’t even be classed at a slap, more like you’re just putting your hands on his waist with a little force.

“But you’re so fucking cute,” he reasons, smiling wider. “My cute baby,” he murmurs lowly and brushes his nose against yours gently. Your breath hitches at the tender action while your fingers curl reflexively to loosely grip his t-shirt. “Do I have consent to administer treatment, angel?” He whispers, lips so close to yours that you can almost feel them moving as he talks.

“I…” Just as you start to nod, your phone starts to ring in the kitchen, making you jump in surprise and jolt away from Chan in a natural reaction to the unexpected noise. “I should get that.”

“Right,” Chan mutters, dropping his arms to his side with a disappointed frown as he watches you scoot around him to enter the kitchen.

When you pick up your phone from the counter, you’re more than just a little surprised to see your ex’s mother calling you.

You haven’t heard from her since the breakup when she messaged you to say that she doesn’t know what happened, but she hopes that you and her can still be friends as she values you so highly. You hadn’t responded then; you hadn’t wanted to interact with anyone who you knew through him, even if you had regret ghosting her afterwards because she genuinely is such a lovely woman who always treated you lovingly.

Still, even with the period of no contact between you, you pick your phone up to answer the call. “Hello?”

“O-oh thank goodness,” the still familiar voice sobs in relief.

“Auntie? What is it? What’s wrong?”

“It’s Kyle, there-there’s been an accident.”

Just over an hour after receiving the call, you’re tucked up in between Kyle’s parents on the couch of the private room with their arms around you, both of them crying for their son as you do your best to comfort them while feeling numb yourself. You’re too in shock at the sight of the heavily injured man laid unconscious on the bed to process it.

When you had arrived with Chan right behind you, the pair had just about managed to tell you through their tears that Kyle had been driving to work that morning when another vehicle had violently run him off of the road.

It had been on such a quiet road so early that nobody else was around; no witnesses to give details of the other car, nor to run to his aide or call for help. By the time someone found the wreck in the ditch, it had been long enough that too much damage had been done.

And now, even after hours of surgery, there’s no knowing if Kyle will make it through the night, let alone wake up again. There’s only waiting.

So, you wait.

“They’ll call if there’s any sign,” Chan reminds as he helps you out of your jacket. “You spent two days by his side, angel, there’s nothing more you can do for him. He’s not your responsibility or person to care for anymore. His parents and sister are there, and they promised to call you.”

“I know,” you reply, moving woodenly as Chan leads you through your apartment to the kitchen with his hand in yours to keep you moving.

He flicks on the light and falls still at the sight of the mess you left on the counter from leaving so quickly three evenings ago to get to the hospital. He never learned what you had been refusing to let him see until now. “Cake,” he murmurs, noticing the half decorated cake on the counter, surrounded by all the items you had been using to decorate it.

“For your new job,” you reply with a shrug. “It’s no good now. Sorry, I’ll buy you a replacement tomorrow.”

“No, no, you don’t have to. Just knowing is enough for me,” Chan assures, turning to bring you in to hold against his chest where you melt against him with an exhale. “I appreciate the thought and effort you went to, angel; that means more than a store bought cake ever could.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t finish it.”

“It’s not your fault. Let’s order something for dinner and while it’s on its way, I’ll clean this up while you go shower.”

“Do I smell?” You mumble against his shoulder.

“Like sadness,” he retorts with a joking edge to his sombre tone that makes you jab your fingers into his waist in scold. He yelps and contorts away from your fingers without releasing his arms from around you. “And meanness.”

“Meanness,” you repeat, scoffing a short laugh and leaning back from his shoulder to look at him.

“Yes. It’s mean to take advantage of my weak spots.”

“You do it to me all the time.”

“Yes, but you’re the nice one, my angel,” he coos, pinching your cheek before he lets you go to nudge you out of the kitchen while you try to recall just when it got so normal for Chan to call you his.

Since becoming best friends with Chan, it’s not unusual at all to return home and find him in your apartment as if he owns the place. Honestly, you genuinely think he spends more time in your apartment than his own, especially the past couple months. The couch is practically his bed at this point.

What is very unusual however, is to arrive home to find the door slightly open and hear another voice talking with Chan from inside your apartment.

“Chan?” You call in a cautious, soft voice as you nudge the door open and peer around it.

“Hi, angel, welcome home,” Chan greets, smiling at you and motioning you to join him opposite the two uniformed police officers standing and talking to him in the entrance hall.

“What’s going on, Channie?” You ask as you stand at his side and cling to his hand while remaining just a little behind him and away from the officers. They’re both taller than you and Chan, with one of them being thick with muscle and rather intimidating. Though when he smiles at you in polite greeting, most of the fear melts away.

“This is Officer Choi Seungcheol and Officer Chwe Hansol, they’re here to talk to you about Kyle,” Chan explains, motioning to each man in turn.

“Is there news on who ran him off the road?” You ask, looking at the two men with hope in your eyes and chest. It’s been over a week since the incident and there hasn’t been any more information about who put Kyle into such a devastating condition.

The last you heard, they had managed to get sight of a damaged SUV in the general vicinity from CCTV a handful of roads away, but the plates turned out to be stolen from another car across the country over a year ago and the windows were blacked out so there’s no way to tell who was driving the car. Whoever it was clearly knows the streets well enough that they escaped the CCTV quickly and the vehicle hasn’t shown up since. Nor has one matching the description been scrapped or sent to be fixed.

“That’s not our department,” the intimidating officer, Seungcheol, replies while giving you another gentle little smile. “I’m afraid we’re from the sexual crimes division, ma’am.”

“Sexual crimes?” You whisper in shock. “Wh-what?”

“We’ve received reports that Kyle has sexually harassed and stalked multiple women over the past year.”

“No, he-he wouldn’t-” you argue, shaking your head as your hands start to tremble ever so slightly, so you hold onto Chan’s hand tighter with both of yours to try and cease the shuddering movements. “You’re wrong.”

“I understand that it’s hard to hear these things about someone you thought you knew, but we have to follow up every lead we have to get all the information we need to press charges.”

“He’s in a hospital bed!” You baulk and let out an incredulous laugh. “You want to charge a man who might not even wake up? What kind of a person are you?!”

“It’s not our choice, ma’am. We’re just doing our jobs and trying to get justice for the victims.”

“I’m not having any part in this. I have nothing to say to you. He never did a thing wrong to me. Get out,” you insist, pointing to the door. “I’m not going to let you bring these accusations into my home without proof.”

“We have proof,” the other officer speaks up, earning a slightly disapproving look from his partner, but he isn’t stopped. “We saw proof ourselves; photos of women taken from outside of windows and other positions that clearly show a lack of consent. And a hidden, digital diary alluding to the acts that match up with statements we received from victims.”

“Photos?” You repeat disbelievingly.

“Yes ma’am, and I’m afraid you were in some. Based on the angle and quality, we believe the photos were taken from a roof into what we can only assume is your own bedroom.”

“My bedroom?”

“Yes ma’am. May we see your room and take photos for comparative purposes?”

“My bedroom…” You can only repeat, too in shock to do anything else as you stare dumbly at the two uniformed men in front of you.

“I think she needs a moment,” Chan says while putting his arm around you to support your gradually weakening body.

“Of course, we’ll wait right here,” Seungcheol agrees in a gentle tone and nods understandingly.

Chan carefully takes you to the living room to sit you on the couch and kneels in front of you. “Baby, breathe, come on,” he encourages softly as he holds your face. “You’re going to have a panic attack if you don’t copy me, come on.” He starts to take exaggerated breaths; big inhale, hold, slow exhale.

You blink at him unseeingly for a few of his breaths before your eyes drop to his mouth and you naturally copy the man who has helped you level your breathing more times than you can count the past year.

“That’s it, that’s my girl,” he praises. “A few more for me, you can do a few more for your Channie, right?” You nod so he smiles and takes a handful more deep, steadying breaths, each of which you obediently copy. “Good, well done.” He leans forward and kisses your head. “I’ll deal with the cops, okay? You just sit here and let your Channie handle it all. You just relax, angel.”

There isn’t a single part of you that wants to face the officers and their accusations again, so you simply nod and let Chan tuck a blanket around you as you curl up against the back of the sofa, before he turns on the TV just loud enough that when he goes back into the hall to talk to the two men, you can’t make out their low murmuring voices.

Throughout the remainder of the visit from the two officers, you don’t move, just sit staring blankly at the cushions in front of you as your mind whirls.

You don’t know what to believe. When Kyle had visited you that day, you really did believe him. Even now, there’s a part of you that struggles to believe the sincerity in his eyes and voice to be nothing more than a clever act to fool you. He has never laid a hand on you, never forced you to do anything or kicked up a fuss if you rejected his advances. Kyle was good.

Or maybe not.

If the police aren’t lying to you, then they have proof; more photos, even though you took the ones you found that time and burned them all, and witness accounts, or well, victim’s statements would be the correct term.

You know it’s possible to spend your entire life with a person and never truly know them, but you truly had thought that you knew Kyle. You had been so close to falling in love with him; that’s why it had hurt so much. You truly had believed that one day, you’d fall mutually in love with him, with a good man, and have a happy life together.

But all this; the accusations, the proof you had found yourself even if you still struggle to accept it at face value, it just goes to show that you never really know a person.

“They’re gone,” Chan’s voice breaks you from your thoughts. You turn your head to watch him cross the living room to sit at your side and invite himself under the blanket. He puts his left arm on the back of the couch in a silent offer that you readily accept, shuffling closer to tuck up under his arm and settle when it’s around you securely.

“Was it my room?” You ask, not really sure if you want to know the answer. But you need to.

Chan lets out a breath that sounds like a reluctant sigh. It’s almost answer enough, yet you need to hear it. “Yeah, angel, it looks like it was your room. They took photos and are going to go to the roof of the motel opposite to take a photo from there to see if it matches. I’ve given them my number to keep me updated and so they contact me if they need to, not you. I told them about the photos you found too and that you burned them so no-one else can have them.”

“Should-should I have reported him then?” You wonder, suddenly worried that you had potentially endangered women by not stepping up.

“Maybe,” he replies in a way that you just know means he thinks you should’ve, but he doesn’t want to upset you.

You curl up smaller and turn your face into his shoulder to let the familiar, soothing scent of his cologne and laundry detergent ease you.

Chan tilts his head on top of yours and holds you that bit tighter. “At least he can’t hurt anyone else anymore.”

The words are supposed to be comforting, but they don’t comfort you at all.

The news comes only a few days later.

It didn’t take long to gather evidence to support the accusations against Kyle. The warrant for his home turned up the photos and a hidden memory stick containing a written diary with documents matching dates of some of the statements, though many more entries without a woman to match to the words. The police just had to confirm the evidence and talk to some people before moving forward with it, like they did with you and Chan.

If it wasn’t for Kyle’s condition, the case would’ve been closed only two days after the police visited you, and he would’ve been sent off to prison. As it is, the man still hasn’t woken and the doctors aren’t confident that he ever will, so he can’t really be held accountable for his actions.

When Chan tells you the news, you feel bad that for the first time, you’re glad that Kyle is unconscious and likely to never wake up; at least this way, he won’t have to face the accusations which a part of you still can’t believe are true.

What you are finally letting yourself believe though, are all the times Chan called you naïve.

“Delivery for the cutest baby angel to have ever existed,” comes the greeting from behind the massive bouquet of flowers almost shoved in your face the very moment you open the front door of your apartment to see who has been insistently ringing the bell.

“That is an obscene amount of flowers,” you murmur while eyeing the bouquet.

It lowers and your best friend’s head appears as he pouts at you cutely. “Don’t you want it?”

“Gimmie,” you encourage, making grabby hands. Chan grins and hands you the bouquet, which is literally three times bigger than your head, before stepping into the apartment while you wander off, happily admiring and sniffing the multitude of flowers.

It’s not unusual for Chan to bring you flowers at all; rather, it’s unusual for your home to not have flowers gifted to you from your best friend. Even if he can’t visit you he sends you flowers at least weekly, and the ones he sends tend to always be more extravagant as if he’s making up for not giving them to you in person.

Every single bouquet is always handpicked by Chan; he always chooses which flowers to give you, not based on their colour or scent but for the meaning.

One of the things that helped you and Chan bond when you first met was your shared love of flowers and their meanings. You both know the meanings of a vast array of flowers, and he always includes yellow roses in his bouquet to symbolise your friendship.

Today is no different; there is an abundance of yellow roses in the bouquet, but there are a mixture of other flowers often in yellow themes, as it seems rather common for yellow flowers to symbolise friendship and happiness.

But sometimes there’s other colours; a little pop of pink tulips to show he cares, white carnations with a cheeky wink as he calls you baby angel, fragrant lavender to remind you of his loyalty to your friendship. Every bouquet is carefully crafted as a message; to tell you that Chan is your best friend and will always be there to love and support you.

And today, right there amongst the usual flowers, a handful of light pink roses.

You run through your mental list of flower meanings. Pink roses tend to mean grace, dark pink for gratitude and light pink has a few meanings just like many flowers. Many of the flowers Chan gives you have multiple meanings, but when put together the bouquets he gives you all mean the same thing. However, light pink roses aren’t used to symbolise friendship, innocence, or care. They mean youth, energy, passion, desire. None of those really blend with the rest of the bouquet’s meaning and it throws you for a loop.

“Did they put in the wrong flower?” You ask, pointing to the light pink roses as you look over at Chan puzzled. He walks over to peer at the bouquet and where you’re motioning, before shaking his head. “But they don’t mean friendship,” you mumble confusedly and look at the flowers again as you try to decipher their reasoning.

Chan doesn’t say a word, just leans his left hip against the counter, left palm on the surface and right hand fiddling with the unused belt loop on your jeans as he waits.

“Wait!” You turn to face him while pointing an accusing finger at him. “Is this you calling me a baby again? Light pink roses for youth?”

Chan chuckles and shakes his head, sliding two of his fingers into the loop now you’re facing one another and letting his palm settle against your hip. “No, it’s not that, though that’s a good one, I should’ve thought of that.”

“Then what?” You tilt your head a little, pouting naturally with your innocent confusion.

“You know. I know you know this one, angel,” he encourages and tugs you closer.

“Joy of life?” You offer, too used to him leading you around and being physically affectionate to really register how close he has you, or how his thumb is gradually tugging at your t-shirt where it’s tucked into your jeans.

“No.”

“Well it’s certainly not energy, you always say I lack energy. Or are you trying to like, manifest energy for me?”

“No, but once again, that’s good, I’ll make you a manifestation bouquet one day soon.”

“Then what? I’m confused, Chan.”

“Want me to tell you?” You nod in confirmation. “What if I show you?”

“What?”

He smirks a little, then pushes off of the counter and cups your jaw with his left hand. “Should I tell you, or show you, baby?” He murmurs, voice pitching low in a way that sends shivers up and down your spine. He leans in closer, brushing his nose against your cheek and nose in a teasing manner, but he doesn’t do anything more. “Well?”

It takes a few seconds for you to react; your heart is racing with anticipation, and you need to swallow a few times. He pulls back and notices your gaze slide down to his lips. “Show me,” you say in a voice so soft and shy it’s practically a whisper.

Chan doesn’t need to be told twice; he darts forward to slot his lips against yours for the first time. There’s no hesitance in his movements, no gentle teasing and dancing as he eases you into it; he kisses you passionately from the first moment, guiding your head to tilt in the perfect angle to deepen the kiss to a filthy degree when he coaxes your mouth open only seconds after his lips touch yours.

You never expected this from Chan; never imagined he’d kiss in such a manner that you feel like he’s consuming your heart and soul in the best of ways. He’s only been kissing you for a few seconds, yet your knees are weak, and you have to cling to him to keep yourself upright.

The moment your hand grips the back of his neck, Chan groans in pleased approval against your mouth and pins you roughly against the counter; his hips pressed against yours and his right hand giving up being subtle about his wants as he yanks your t-shirt out of the waistband of your jeans so that he can slide his hand underneath and run his palm against your bare skin.

Of course, a kiss that passionate can’t go on for too long, you especially need to catch your breath as you hadn’t been prepared at all for the intensity and keep forgetting to breathe as your lips and tongue move with his.

Though when you press against his chest and turn your head aside slightly to try and catch your breath, Chan doesn’t stop kissing you, he just relocates his focus, leaving a trail of hot, open mouthed kisses over your jaw and down your neck.

“Wanted you for so fucking long, angel,” he admits, voice thick with arousal and sounding unfairly in breath even if his chest is heaving too. He drags his teeth over the crook of your neck making you gasp and grip him tighter. “Driving me crazy, ‘m so hard. Can I have you? Can I take you to bed and drown in your pussy? Fuck you so hard I owe you a new bed?”

“Fuck,” you breathe out and grab a handful of his hair to drag him back up. His eyes are so hooded that you’re not certain he’s even looking at you. He looks so far gone and it does dangerous things to you. “Y-you do so much for me, Chan.”

“What?” He blinks away some of the lust dazing him to peer at you confusedly, and a little offended and the out of place comment. “What are you talking about all of a sudden? I’m trying to take you to bed, and you say that? You can just say no, not do some weird speech.”

“I’m not doing that,” you assure and move your left hand off of his shoulder, down his torso and under his oversized t-shirt to find the button of his jeans. He looks down in surprise, then back up at you with desire flooding back into his expression and eyes as you skilfully get his jeans open. Neither of you care that they immediately drop to the floor around his ankles with the jangle of his keys in his pocket, as you get your hand in his boxers. “Let me do this for you.”

“Fuck, yeah, yeah, whatever you want angel,” he approves before leaning in to seal your lips back together.

After your tryst in the kitchen, which lead to half of the bouquet getting destroyed when Chan bent you over the counter chest first into the flowers, sex is suddenly on the table for the two of you. Often literally. It seems as if that encounter opened the floodgates of a year of repressed desire from Chan and alerted you to the fact that his passion is more than just a little reciprocated.

Of course, you’ve known for a while now that you’re attracted to Chan; ever since the realisation that day in the store thanks to the leather jacket, which he is often prancing around in, especially since he’s realised how much you like him in it. Sometimes he’ll even turn up at your apartment, open the zip of his jacket and reveal that he’s wearing nothing but your marks underneath, leading to you pinning him to the closest surface to expand on the collection.

What you hadn’t known is just how deep your attraction runs. That at some point within you, the lust starts to morph and before it reaches your chest, it turns to a love which squeezes your heart a little every time he slows down to press a soft kiss to your lips, or you find him looking at you with eyes sparkling with adoration.  

You never imagined that you would fall for your best friend, yet here you are, weeks into your relationship turning sexual, and falling asleep naked in his arms more often than not while not wanting the morning to come because you know he’ll leave before you’re awake so that he can go home and get ready for work.

There’s a part of you that has, on more than one occasion, almost blurted out that he should just bring his work clothes over; you’ve already made space in the wardrobe to hang his shirts and space in the drawer for his trousers. But you don’t.

As much as you’ve come to understand and accept that the love you feel for Chan is no longer purely platonic, you aren’t ready to move on from your ex. There’s still a piece of your heart in Kyle’s hands, even if they are limp in his hospital bed and your heart should’ve been released back to you months ago.

You’ve tried to move on; you thought it would’ve happened naturally thanks to your recently developed feelings for your best friend and the regular sessions of getting fucked dumb into various surfaces by the man.

Still, Kyle remains, and you don’t understand why your heart won’t let you love Chan entirely.

You hope that Chan is happy with this; that he’s content to spend spare moments between your usual hangouts and your thighs. You don’t want to have to tell him that you’re not over Kyle; you know that Chan doesn’t like the man. Although he never voices his displeasure in you still visiting the Kyle in the hospital, you can always see it in his eyes when you leave and how he fucks you that bit harder when you return.

Hope, it seems, is still stubbornly stuck in the bottom of the box, and has no place in the real world, especially not yours.

“You have a key,” you point out flatly when you open the door having expected the takeout you’ve ordered for dinner for yourself and Chan, yet find the man himself on the other side of the door with his hands behind his back and still wearing his work clothes. “What’re you hiding? Please tell me it’s dinner; I thought you’re the delivery man you know?”

“It’s not dinner,” he chuckles, then brings his hands around to reveal this week’s bouquet. Tulips; red, yellow, and orange. Love.

“Chan…” you trail off, not sure what to say and expression downturned when you look up at him. You can practically see the moment you break his heart.

“Oh, I guess I misread this,” he smiles embarrassed and awkward, even with the pain evident in his eyes. “I thought that you might return my feelings finally, but I guess not.”

“You’re not wrong,” you confess softly. “I just…I’m not over Kyle.”

“What?” His features scrunch in bewilderment. “You’re not over the man who would be arrested for sexual harassment and stalking right now if not in a coma? Am I hearing that right?”

“I still can’t connect that to the man I knew.”

“He really fucked with your head, didn’t he?” His arms lower defeatedly.

“No, he didn’t. He was just…good to me.”

“He cheated on you, angel, he wrote about it in his diary and other women have said as much too. What’s it going to take for you to accept that and move on?”

“I-I don’t know, Chan. I’m sorry but I just can’t do that. I’ve tried to get over him, but it hasn’t happened.”

“Well…I’m not going anywhere,” he declares and steps forward to offer the bouquet. “You may not be able to love me and be with me the way I want, but I still love you, with everything in me and I’ll be here for you all the same.”

“Won’t that hurt you?”

“Baby,” he chuckles and tenderly cups your cheek in one hand, the other still holding the tulips you’ve yet to accept. “I’ve loved you since the moment I first laid my eyes on you; I’ve been by your side through all of the assholes you gave your time to, even if they didn’t deserve it. This one will pass too.”

“What if it doesn’t?”

“It will,” a flash of determination appears in his eyes as he smiles at you. “You’ll be mine soon enough, I promise you that, angel.”

At first, you had been cautious with Chan after his confession. You don’t want to hurt him and make him suffer at your side, so you pulled back on the affection and stopped the sexual aspect of your relationship entirely. Chan hadn’t been very happy and pouted at you when you turned him down the first time, but he didn’t push it and accepted it. Though he still reaches out to pull you close to hold and well, you don’t really want to quit him truthfully, so you let that happen.

After a few weeks, it’s as if the month of mind-blowing sex never happened and you and Chan are back to being nothing more than best friends. He keeps to his word and remains by your side as he always has, with no pushing or attempts to get you to reconsider and accept his love wholeheartedly.

Maybe that’s why one day when you’re laid side by side on a picnic blanket looking up at the stars with the snacks and drinks, which Chan supplied for the stargazing session, contently settling in your belly, you look at him and for the first time, you don’t feel as if your heart is missing a single piece.

“What?” Chan asks, side eyeing you amusedly when you’ve been staring at him instead of the sky for a few seconds too long. “Are you about to tell me that the stars in the sky don’t sparkle as bright as the stars in my eyes?”

“Where do you even come up with this stuff?” You laugh and nudge him playfully before sitting up. “Whoa,” you murmur when your head spins, eyes slamming closed and hands flying out to try and balance yourself.

“Angel, what’s wrong?” Chan’s hands are on you in seconds as he sits up to support you.

“M wobbly,” you slur, trying to look at him as your hands grip him tight. “Channie,” you start to panic as the dizziness doesn’t subside at all, if anything it feels like it’s getting worse as he starts to multiply before your eyes. “S-something’s wrong.”

“Shh, it’s okay, Channie’s got you, lay down angel, Channie’s got you,” he soothes, gently laying you back down on the blanket and propping himself up on his right elbow as his left hand cups your cheek. “You’ll feel better soon; just close your eyes and let your Channie look after you.”

“Chan…” You’re finding it harder and harder to move your body with every second. It feels as if your muscles are turning to sludge and bones rubber. You try to lift your arm from where it flopped to your stomach when he laid you down, yet you can’t lift it.

Chan watches the panic fill your eyes and strokes his hand over your head, then back to your cheek again. “You’re okay, my love, I’ll never let anything happen to you. Your Channie will always look after you.”

You can’t even open your mouth to respond. A choked sound leaves your parted lips as your vision starts blurring darkly around the edges.

“I will do whatever I need to, to make sure that nobody can ever hurt you again, my angel,” his voice is taking on a strange otherworldly quality, fading in and out every other syllable.

It feels as if you’re becoming one with the ground under you. It’s still hard against your back, yet it feels as if you’re melting into it, like every point of contact is rapidly ceasing to exist as you fight to keep your eyes open.

“Close your eyes, baby,” Chan’s warped voice meets you. He says something else, but a buzzing appears, overlapping his muffled words until the high pitched sound is all you can hear.

You feel something touch your forehead and brush down gently, forcing your eyes closed. You don’t have the strength to open them again.

It’s pitch black, only the ringing for company until suddenly, it leaves.

There’s barely time to register the pure silence before your consciousness melts into the ground to join the rest of you.

Everything comes back to you all at once.

Your body jerks awake as your eyes fly open. The soft, natural light around you is too bright on your sore eyes and the gentle sound of the birds outside singing their morning song pierces your sensitive ears. Instinctively, you close your eyes and lift your hands with the intention of pressing your palms to your ears to block out the noise, but something stops you from raising your hands more than a few inches.

Panicked, your eyes open and look down to find thick, padded straps around your wrists and buckled in place with a chain connecting each to the wooden frame of the bed under you. You tug, but they don’t give. You try to move your legs, but your ankles are bound in the same way; even if you don’t look at them to check, you just know you’d see the same binds there.

“Breathe,” the voice is familiar, is the one that you’re so used to listening to that you find yourself listening and taking some deep, stabilising breaths without even thinking about it. “Good girl.”

After a few seconds, you realise that Chan is in the room; the strange room where you’re cuffed to a strange bed. You have no idea where you are; the walls look wooden and it smells kind of musty, like it hasn’t been used in a while, but the familiar scent of Chan’s laundry detergent meets your nose from the soft, clean pillow under your head when you turn your head to try and find the man.

He’s sitting in a rickety old rocking chair near the closed door of the small room.

There’s nothing else in the room; no curtains on the window on the wall, which the right side of the bed is pushed against; the window is cracked open, letting in fresh air but even from where you’re laid, you can see bars on the outside. There’s a bulb hanging from the centre of the ceiling emitting a redundant, soft orange glow. And nothing else.

Just you, the bed, the chair, and the man you thought was your best friend looking at you as he gently rocks back and forth, back and forth, the chair creaking with every movement.

For tense moments, minutes maybe, you just stare at Chan in horror. This is not the man you’ve spent the past almost two years side by side with. This is not the man you had been seconds away from telling that you finally loved him with everything in you.

Your Chan is beautiful inside and out; with bright eyes always shining with mirth and adoration when they find you, and a smile that could weaken the toughest of hearts. He was love and happiness. Your love. Your happiness. You don’t know where that’s gone.

This Chan terrifies you. His face is flat, no smile, no sparkle in his eyes. He’s looking at you with an expression so dark and haunting; something similar to the way he looked when you told him that Kyle turned up at your apartment building all those months ago in the café, yet somehow so much worse.

For the first time since meeting Lee Chan, you look at him and you want to be as far away as possible, and then further. This isn’t a man you want to be near. Yet, you’re left without a choice.

“Wha-what’s going on, Chan?” You stammer.

“This is your fault, you know,” he informs matter-of-factly. “If you had just said yes to me that day, if you hadn’t held onto that fucking asshole, then this would’ve never happened. We could be at home, in bed; I could be buried deep in your pussy and filling you with cum again and again until you’re round with my baby. We could’ve been happy; had our family, gotten married,” he huffs a dry laugh and abruptly stops rocking. “We could’ve had the perfect fucking family, baby! We could’ve been perfect. But no! You had to cling to that asshole!” He gets to his feet, flinging his arms up in the air as his lips start to split into a disbelieving smile.

He doesn’t even seem to notice that you flinch and try to move further away from him as he steps closer. He seems entirely caught up in his own monologue as he starts to pace the short length of the room to your left.

“I’ve done everything I can to win you over! I studied you for fucking months before showing myself to you. Changed my hair, changed my style, even changed my fucking interests to suit your tastes!” He wheels around and stalks closer to put his right hand on the headboard above you while he stares down at you with eyes wide. “I fucking hate flowers, you know? Hate those stupid fucking things, yet I read every fucking book I could find to learn about them. Learned how to grow them from tiny little seeds all for you,” he points at you. “And what thanks do I get?” He laughs and pushes away from the bed to turn and take a few steps away. “Nothing! Okay, no, no, that’s not fair to you,” he concedes.

Chan turns to face you with his hands and features settled so suddenly into something so placating that you wonder if you had imagined the unhinged mess he was seconds ago.

“I got to taste that pretty little pussy and feel it around my cock, your mouth too. Fuck, baby, I could’ve held out longer if you hadn’t ended that but you, you little cock tease, had to give me a taste of heaven and rip it away from me.” He tuts disapprovingly and gives you an exaggerated pout. “You’ve really broken my heart, you know?”

“Th-then let me go and you never ha-have to see me again,” you try to reason, but he laughs; a full, loud, rolling laugh while leaning over with his hands on his knees as if you’ve told the best joke he’s ever heard.

“Oh, angel!” He exclaims as he straightens up, clapping his hands amusedly. “That’s good, really good. You’re so funny, baby, it’s one of the things I love most about you. You’ve always made me laugh.”

For a few seconds, he looks at you so tenderly that he looks like your Chan again; the Chan you fell in love with, the Chan you wish you had realised was a trick from the start. It makes sense that he always called you naïve when he knows from experience how easy it is to fool you.

“You’re mine now, ‘till death do us part and all that. Sorry I don’t have a ring for you, I’ve never been one for accessories.” He lifts his bare hands to wiggle them at you.

It’s only now that you realise he isn’t wearing a single piece of jewellery, something you thought wasn’t possible for your Chan. His clothes aren’t baggy and hiding his form, and hair no longer shaggy and in his eyes. He’s wearing blue jeans like usual, but these ones are straight legged and show off his thick thighs and ass; his plain white fitted t-shirt is tucked into his jeans neatly, showcasing his slim waist and strong upper body; with his hair neatly styled back in a casual, yet neat, manner. You’ve never seen him like this; he looks older this way, less playful.

It's another reminder that he’s not your Chan. He never truly was.

“I wish it didn’t come to this; you know?” He comments while walking over to sit on the edge of the bed by your waist and brush the back of his fingers over your cheek, entirely ignoring the way you flinch away from this touch, even if it is painfully tender. “You’re so beautiful; I’ve wanted you from the moment I first laid eyes on you, even if you never saw me.” He sighs dramatically and gets up to stand beside the bed. “Even back then you looked anywhere but me. It’s funny though,” he muses, pacing a little as his lips start to lift and bring back that manic smile he earlier wore.

It scares the shit out of you.

“You never once questioned your bad luck,” he quotes your own words with a mocking tone, trying not to laugh as he does so. “Or how it only appeared once I came into your life. You really are fucking naïve, baby.”

“What did you do?” You whisper, horrified at the realisation that Chan had been the reason that all of your relationships have failed.

Now that you think about it, he had always warned you away from them all for some reason; some kind of claim of a bad feeling, a rumour, seeing them kissing another woman. You never questioned how he always had something to say about every single man you showed interest in, or seemed to know things he shouldn’t really know. You put too much trust in the man from day one and now it’s come back to bite you in the ass.

“Whatever I needed to. It was all so easy too, like you wanted a reason to leave them all. I really thought it was because you wanted me,” he laughs darkly and pins an equally as dark look on you as his smile drops. “And then Kyle came along. Fucking Kyle. Perfect Kyle with his clean record and respect and giant, squishy heart. Well, it’s extra squishy now I pushed him off the road,” he laughs, eyes lighting with twisted delight.

“No,” you choke out. “You- no- you didn’t- tell me you didn’t do that to him, Chan,” you plead desperately.

Chan laughs and walks over to lean over you again, his left hand braced against the headboard and the other playing with the strands of your hair on the pillow beside your head. “If only you had believed me. If you hadn’t let him talk to you that day; if you had just kicked him out and come right to me like you were supposed to, it would’ve never happened, angel. You had me right there waiting for you and you picked that asshole and now guess what?” He looks at you with a bright, manic smile, eyes wide and shining with mirth you wish doesn’t exist. “He’s never fucking waking up, baby!” He beams, looking so proud of himself. “I made sure of that!”

You feel sick to your stomach.

It must show on your face because Chan’s own falls and he frowns at you. “Don’t look at me like that. This isn’t my fault.” He scoffs and backs up from the bed as that terrifyingly haunting look returns to his features. “I didn’t think I’d have to go this far; I thought you’d accept all those rumours and evidence I spent so much time, money, and effort planting. I bribed and blackmailed so many people the past months. Got the asshole fucking convicted and you still refuse to pick me.”

Chan sighs heavily, as if it really does pain him, before he pivots and walks to the door to open it, though he turns just enough to look back at you.

“I can’t tell if you’re too smart to believe all that or fucking stupid to still want to be by his side after all the accusations. Maybe he did brainwash your naïve little self.”

He stares at you for an unnervingly long moment as if he’s trying to figure you out and wondering what exactly Kyle did to earn your loyalty, and how exactly he can mimic it to make you his.

“Oh well,” he decides with a shrug, making you jolt at his sudden voice. “Not that it matters anymore because I’m not letting you leave here. If you’re not going to be mine on your own terms, we’re doing it my way.”

He closes the door after him, and you break with the sound of the lock clicking into place.

Tears roll down your cheeks and temples, soaking the soft pillow under your head as sobs tear from your chest. You keep tugging at the binds holding you down, yet they don’t budge.

You’re stuck here.

Even if you somehow escape your binds, there are bars on the window and a lock securing the thick wooden door.

You’re stuck here. For good.

Forever.

Stuck with the man you had trusted to look after you, to be by your side for a long time. You just never expected it to be like this. You as his prisoner; his little plaything to do with as he pleases until he gets bored of you and then… you don’t even want to think about it.

The sun slowly rises higher and higher into the sky and finally, you stop pulling at your binds, stop crying; out of energy and tears with your whole body hurting, yet nothing in comparison to the pain in your heart where it’s stomped into the wooden floorboards and covered in Chan’s footprints.

You dread the moment he returns. Dread having to live your life like this.

But you know you don’t have a choice. You’re his now, to do with as he pleases. You no longer have a choice in how your life goes.

The click of the lock disengaging sends fear racing through your tired body, adrenaline pumping, yet there’s still nothing you can do as Chan steps into the room with a tray in his hands and a smile on his face.

“Hi baby, it’s time for food! I made your favourite.”

As you watch him approach wearing that same cute smile that first drew you to him, all you can do is curse yourself for being so fucking naïve.

Don’t forget to reblog if you liked to help spread the story and let others read it too! And don't be shy to leave comments or send an ask so I can see your thoughts 🥺 💖

Permanent taglist: @okiedokrie @variety-is-the-joy-of-life @tusswrites

[cripplecharacters]

Hello, I'm writing a character that is autistic. I'm autistic and white (afab) and my character is black (amab), can I use my own experience with autism as a "draftc for his character? If not, what can I do to make the writing feel correct/original?

(sry if I made any grammar mistakes, I'm not a native speaker)

Hi asker,

Ultimately, autism is both race- and sex- and gender- neutral. Symptoms and traits are not going to vary drastically because of any of the above things.

So yes, you can use your own experience as a basis for your character. What you'd need to pay more attention to is the responses of other people to your character and the culture that they're being raised in.

For example, black disabled people are treated especially heinously by law enforcement, so if you were going to include anything about that, a little black kid might be taught as much as possible by his family to be careful around cops and develop a script and to not stim around them. Masking and not stimming in a case like this isn't a case of hiding your true self, it's about protecting your life and safety. And yet, this doesn't actually have anything to do with this character's autism being any different than a little white boy his age. Just that it is treated differently.

And, like any character of color, the only way to make them isn't just to make them live the same life culturally than a white person and then change the color of their skin. Researching about their culture and including bits of that in their life is important – things like food, values, hairstyles, cultural events, holidays, and such.

I want to add that the assigned genders of your characters don't matter as much as you think they might. I know it's common to refer to 'female/girl autism' on the internet as its own separate beast, but there isn't really a material difference in symptoms and traits. Some traits will be seen differently socially by others, like with race, and people might be treated differently depending on their sex about how they behave, but the behaviors themselves are not divided nicely on a gender line or anything like that. That misconception, really, is just born from misogyny, sexism, and societal expectations, not from autism itself being different.

Hope this helps,

mod sparrow

Hi,

mod Sparrow covered the actual question, so I'll mention the AGAB part.

There is no sexual dimorphism related to hormones, genitals, or chromosomes in autism. The severity of a person's symptoms or how they experience them is unrelated to any kind of sex characteristic, nor to a past decision made on the basis of at-the-time appearance of the person's external genitals, which is what AGAB is.

The "girl/boy autism" is a sexist dichotomy that is completely made up and presents girls as inherently less disabled by their autism. It erases the severely disabled girls and women who do have autism and shows "girl autism" as more manageable and pro-social than "boy autism" which is impossible to control and anti-social. That's nonsense and the same kind of erasure of women as in every other minority.

The only real difference that is based on gender is how it's socially treated by others, just like mod Sparrow mentioned. Men's autistic symptoms are generally considered more acceptable than they would be if they belonged to a woman, even if the symptom is exactly the same. If a man shows autistic tendencies, he can be considered "intriguing and unique", but if a woman did the same, she would be "off-putting and weird".

This, however, obviously isn't based on what the person's AGAB was. A transgender woman's autistic behavior won't be seen the same way a cisgender man's behavior would be. It will in fact put her under more scrutiny than a cis woman would be under, not less. AGAB is a past event that serves no function in this question, nor in most contexts. AGAB doesn't answer for gender, presentation, chromosomes, hormone dominance, organs, functionality of these organs, or anything else other than what someone arbitrarily said about a newborn. Categorizing people based on what gender they were assigned at birth - rather than any present characteristic - is bioessentialism.

I know this is not an answer to the ask, but please question what a past evaluation of the character's genitals would inform here that their actual gender wouldn't.

mod Sasza

[saintsenara]

I have a question about your characterization of James and Sirius in war of roses: in the fic you have them behave fairly cruel to snape (verbal and emotional), do you see them doing that in canon or were you adding a bit extra for the story you were telling? Love that fic btw ❤️❤️

thank you very much for the ask, anon! i've got lots of marauders-dynamic questions in the ol' inbox, which can serve as the perfect motivation to finish the next chapter of the war of the roses [or - y'know - the perfect way to procrastinate from it...], and this one seems an ideal place to start.

and the simple answer is... yes, of course i see james and sirius subjecting snape to verbal and emotional cruelty in canon. it's right there on the page. it's just treated less explicitly by the canon narrative than the physical element of the bullying.

[until the end of deathly hallows, that is.]

sirius and [especially] lupin frame the marauders' targeting of snape as something primarily physical and completely mutual:

"Well," said Lupin slowly, "Snape was a special case. I mean, he never lost an opportunity to curse James, so you couldn’t really expect James to take that lying down, could you?"

which means that they both elide the non-physical aspects of the bullying into this supposedly mutual physical tension. snape's hatred of james is put down to jealousy, which is taken to have triggered him to attack james, which is taken to have triggered james to respond.

sirius and lupin are - unsurprisingly - extremely unreliable historians of this period of their lives. but the adult snape also seems to primarily regard the bullying he experienced as physical - as we see in half-blood prince, when harry attempts to curse snape following dumbledore's death:

"Coward, did you call me, Potter?" shouted Snape. "Your father would never attack me unless it was four on one, what would you call him, I wonder?"

and this framing of things by the characters involved seems - broadly - to be taken at face value by many fans.

on the more pro-snape end of the scale, discussions of him being traumatised by the bullying focus on the trauma of experiencing physical violence, especially in the context of being attacked - as snape puts it - only when outnumbered - particularly now that james' behaviour in snape's worst memory is increasingly understood by fans as [attempted] sexual assault.

on the more pro-marauders end of the scale, snape's own willingness to use physical violence - and, in snape's worst memory, to be the person who attempts to strike first and who attacks while james' back is turned - ends up being used to support sirius and lupin's assessment of snape and james' relationship as one of mutual antagonism... often without any thought seemingly given as to why sirius and lupin would want to present it this way.

but this means - i think - that other, more insidious parts of the canon dynamic between snape and the marauders - that is, the constant, low-level non-physical cruelty to which they subject him - end up being given less attention by readers than they deserve.

we can see several of these at play in snape's worst memory:

james and sirius refer to snape as "snivellus" and "snivelly" throughout the altercation - something sirius also does as an adult, prior to harry witnessing snape's memories, as a reaction to snape insulting him [that is, as a reaction to snape getting - as he sees it - too big for his boots].

in deathly hallows, we see the origin of this nickname: snape gets it because he has a female best friend - who speaks up to defend him from james and sirius, reversing the expected gender dynamic - and is disparaging about gryffindor because the house prioritises brawn [that is, physical strength - especially masculine physical strength] over brains.

there's an enormous homophobic subtext here - james and sirius immediately settle upon the idea that snape is improperly masculine, which makes him [as it would in the eyes of many men] a target who needs to be punished.

this subtext is present in the incidents of physical cruelty we see - james threatening to strip snape is a way of him soothing his wounded pride over lily publicly rejecting him by transferring that humiliation onto a male target seen as more deserving of such treatment; sirius telling snape about lupin and the shrieking shack is a way for him to humiliate someone he thinks of as nosy, meddling, jealous, and weak [feminine-coded!] by placing him in a situation which he'd lack the physical strength to escape [and - of course - snape is then rescued - like a damsel in distress - by big ol' masculine james].

but it's also present in the way the marauders speak to and about snape, separately from any physical confrontation - sirius referring to snape as lucius malfoy's "lapdog" is him insinuating a sexual relationship between them in which snape is the passive [with the implication, therefore, that he's the more "feminine"] partner; lupin claiming that snape's hatred of james was caused by being less physically strong, attractive, and respected than him; and so on - in a way which implies that it coloured most of their day-to-day interactions.

sirius admits to having been watching snape during their exam. while this is set up in the text as a precursor to physical violence - predators stalking their prey - it's clear elsewhere in canon that the marauders kept a close eye on snape in order to facilitate their non-physical bullying.

for example, we learn in the prince's tale that james' hatred of snape is partially motivated by sexual jealousy - he is unhappy [which connects to the homophobic element outlined above] that someone he sees as improperly masculine has greater access to a woman he thinks should be with him than he himself does. we also learn that snape is aware of this - and that his hatred for james is also motivated by sexual jealousy - he is unhappy with the idea that james might "steal" lily from him.

while attempting to prevent this from happening by turning lily against james, snape reveals to lily that james fancies her. significantly, him doing this comes at the end of a run of dialogue which makes clear that snape comes by most of his information about the marauders from the horses' mouths - that is, he observes them and follows them and eavesdrops upon them. it can be logically concluded, then, that snape has come by the information that james fancies lily by overhearing james himself say it. and it can also be logically concluded that james would have said this when he knew snape would be able to overhear him.

after all, sirius complains in prisoner of azkaban that snape was always "sneaking around... trying to find out what we were up to" - and then says that the reason he decided to lure snape to the shrieking shack was to punish him for doing this. it stands to reason, then, that snape's propensity for eavesdropping on the marauders was something they made use of more widely to bully him, including in contexts [such as in the classroom] when they would have had no opportunity to attack him physically - not least because this would, given snape's personality, rile him up into a state of agitation and paranoia similar to the one we see in snape's worst memory, where he's ready for a physical fight the second he catches sight of james and sirius and james and sirius are only too happy to oblige, which they could then use to jump him when the lesson ended.

we can get some idea of what these eavesdropped conversations might feature from canon.

in snape's worst memory, sirius only speaks to snape directly to disparage his looks and his masculinity - "his nose was touching the parchment... there'll be great grease marks all over it" / "what're you going to do, snivelly, wipe your nose on us?". the marauder's map also insults snape's appearance - and the map's insults are clearly the result of it having been enchanted to respond in such a way if snape, specifically, got hold of it.

in both of these examples, the mockery of snape's appearance is inextricable from mockery of his financial status and class background. snape being described as "greasy" - by both sirius and the map - is him being derided for being "dirty", which is him being derided for being "poor".

this isn't always the case when snape is described thus - harry, for example, clearly just means "greasy" as "greasy" - but the text makes clear that the layered meaning is the one we're supposed to understand the marauders were going for:

the prince's tale notes that james and snape's divergent home lives are obvious from first glance; james washing snape's mouth out with soap punishes him for swearing - that is, for behaving in a way james considers uncouth; james dangling snape upside down to reveal his underwear humiliates him by exposing his poverty - which the text spells out by emphasising that snape's underpants are "greying" - as much as it humiliates him by exposing him full stop; sirius taunts the adult snape by implying he relies on lucius malfoy [and on dumbledore] to look after him - that is, that he needs a patron because he has no status of his own [and snape responds by mocking sirius' reduced social status within the order, pouring salt into the wound by pointing out that he - rather than sirius, who regards the reverse as the natural order of things - is the one whose work is actually important].

and this - this undercurrent of constant snipes and insults which canon suggests - is what has ended up in the war of the roses as something sirius remembers as a key part of his and james' dynamic with snape. given where the story's going, my sirius is focusing a lot on the homophobic aspect of this non-physical cruelty. and while we don't find an exact match for what he's thinking about in the books -not least because, since the books are written for a child audience, they can't use the language i can in my explicit-rated fic - it is absolutely implied by the canon text.

[muwwwsky]

HALLOOO EVERYNYAN!!!!!!! HOW ARE YOU!!??? FINEEE, TANK U!!!!!#££#€’&&@

call me Hesu ! ! i draw some silly doodles :3

[ she > any ]

also I’m Russian and I’m using translator, sorry for bad eng sometimes >.>

minor (15) Im ok to communicate with adults, but please dont make sexual jokes towards me

maybe adhd (?)

Avalona Mercury kisser

omnisexual (prefer women) cis girl

multifandom but mainly homestuck, ranfren, invader zim and Osomatsu san ! ! profic & anti harassment

[🍋🌈//🍖🌈//🌸🌙//🐾🍟]

DNI LIST

pro contact (harmful) paraphiles (like p3d0philes, z00philes, n3cr0philes, etc. You b1tches dont belong to proship community GTFO), homo/transphobic, racism/ableism/nazism/sexism/etc, war support, doxxers, real murderers supporters/fans, antis (i hate you guys pls dni you make me uncomfortable), people who harass others over fiction, anti selfshippers, cringe culture

PLEASE INTERACT LIST

profic, proship, comship, anti harrassment, lolisho, blmatsu, avalona mercury fans (and any female character from ranfren (i luv ranfren women)), ZaDR/ZaDF/TaGR/TaGF fans, Wit Pipir fans, anti anti, lucky star fans, homestuck fans, comic "улыбниська" fans, voca/uta/fanloid fans!!

you can use my art without credit it’s ok!! ^_^

BAII HAVE A NICE DAY

[chaifootsteps]

College Anon back after so long. Got swamped with, well, college and every time I came in, your ask box was closed haha! Forgot most of my criticisms because these shows are forgettable so sorry if this is disjointed.

Anyways, WHAT THE FUCK. The new episode is SOOOO bad. The jokes are bad apart from a few at the end, the plot is nonsensical and shouldn't have happened right now, the song is TERRIBLE. I made a whole rant in the YouTube comment section because I was genuinely so disappointed.

I had found Full Moon quite good from what I remember because, to me, it was so obviously pro-Blitzø and a turning point for Stolas... Yeah. I should have known I was wrong.

As for the HH leaks, I only watched episode 2. I'm disappointed that Lute is yet another female character centered around a man. I don't like that she's also in love with Adam. It feels like there's too much emphasis on romance instead of friendships and further entangles her with Adam, therefore taking away her agency.

Pentious... I love him! I LOVE that his story is about inaction. It's a great message but his inaction was so heinous that it justifies him being sent to Hell unlike Chidi from The Good Place who showed that they needed a Purgatory for neutral people. Pentious here NEEDED to go to Hell for what he allowed to happen.

I also think this explains perfectly why it's him and not Angel. Because let's be honest, Angel doesn't deserve to go up there. His crimes on Earth and in Hell are a lot harder, if not impossible, to redeem. Him becoming a victim does not take away from the hurt he and his family caused. He could help raise the fact that being sexual isn't a crime and that Hell pushes people to get worse, with punishment unfitting for their wrongdoings. But unlike Sir Pentious, he wasn't a good person and actively harmed people. It wasn't that he was pushed to it when he was a decent person before, he simply got worse and had his remorse disappeared. In the end, it makes the fact that Charlie chose HIM to represent her goal of redemption laughable because Pentious is, he was always so obviously The One. It makes Angel's jealousy and insecurity tragic, which I wish they would explore, because he was right. He SHOULD BE. He likely won't reach redemption or not as easily. Pentious was the one to help Charlie's dreams come true and bring change, help making the afterlife better. And, my God, that would be SUCH a good concept and arc for Angel, especially when he's in a toxic, messy, and deeply abusive relationship, in a job he loves and hates, struggling to make new friendships work as a new him.

I know none of what they set up will be used or used well but the premise is good and so when they introduce these things, it makes the episode good. It's just that what comes next isn't. Pentious crying at the end of the episode is heartbreaking. The jokes land (love Abel! Great foil to Adam, I wish they introduced Cain for funsies. Saint Peter (iirc) is also pretty funny. I like that Sera is the only competent person in the room, it explains a lot (esp when you could infer that Adam nudged her in the worst direction possible) and just works), the songs are nice, the visuals are promising. The story is meh but it IS character-driven and that's working.

That said, of course it's gross to use a real life situation as backstory even though it's become akin to a legend/myth. I think they should have had something similar, maybe inspired or a clear reference to it, but not the actual deal. People died! Thousands lived in fear! A little bit of respect please!

Also, I still hope that Adam is brought back for REAL. NOT shoved in as fanservice as I bet happened but as a genuine foil to Pentious and the idea of redemption. Something to keep angels accountable, something that proves God gives a fuck. Let there be an actual cycle. We KNOW angels can fall. Between Lucifer and the Cherubs, we have ample proof. C'mon this would give Vaggie an arc, development and a backstory. Adam is a genuinely funny character with lots of potential, his VA is AMAZING and his music genre slaps. Bring him back you cowards!

Last note: it feels like the songs are FINALLY finished. Unlike Season 1, it doesn't feel like a draft or like they're missing instruments or an entire part (often a bridge). I might be biased because I don't care about ballads and Lute's song shares a rock-ish sound with Adam, whose songs were the best of the soundtrack, but it feels like there's some improvement here.

If your ask box is still open, I might send what I commented on the lastest HB episode because I feel like it's a decent critic but whatever. Been a while, hope you're doing well and that you aren't as harassed as before by the shitty fandom Viv is cultivating!

Ahh, I apologize for the frequently closed ask box! I hate the thought of people coming in with something to say and being met with that, but as of this moment, it's pushing 1,000. But I'm happy to report that the Viv standom's been mostly leaving me alone!

These are excellent thoughts, definitely agree on the music -- it seems to be a pretty prevailing opinion -- and I hope you're doing well too!

[sleepyghoster]

Still tweaking, I have come to the conclusion that I actually hate most things about mha and it's fandom except it's vigilante/villain/support course deku fics. I hate a lot of the designs , I hate most of the fans, and I HATE the creator. There is no reason for him to be drawing all the female students in pros in revealing outfits while no male characters are designed like that.

Thank you non-existent people who read my 6 am rant, I needed to scream this into the void because the hatred in my bones was making it hard to sleep

Hagakure being completely naked is so unnecessary especially when we know making clothing that adapts to quirks like mirios hero costume. Why isn't she just in a suit that has the ability to turn invisible with her??? Why tf is she completely naked when fighting and no one stops her for her own safety????

Another unnecessarily revealing costume is Momo's, with quirk technology she could 100% have a costume that is someone how infused with her DNA to give her the ability to create thing on the fly and be much safer and effective. Even without that she could have a much more covering outfit for her own safety and dignity.

Minetas existence as a whole should have ever happened.

Onto pros, there's such a clear difference between how the male pros are designed personality and costume wise vs how the female characters are. The female pros are usually shown as sexual in some way along with being passive aggressive towards the other female pros simply because they're competition(that one interview) The overall lack of character depth for the female characters in general is crazy.

So many of the fans are fujoshis and general weirdos over the TEEN characters and I've seen so so many mischarcterizing all the characters to make them look better or worse then they actually are. And ofc my avid bakugo hate, the root of my hate prob comes from the fans due to how they acted back in 2020 and are still acting now. People always try making excuses for his behavior towards others instead of just admitting that he was a horrible asshole at one point but he's had character growth and i can see that but the way people just try to act like it never happened or try to say that izuku doesn't even care about the fact he bullied him is genuinely infuriating. Realistically there is no way that being bullied throughout elementary and middleschool doesn't effect izuku in some way, overall I don't truly hate bakugo but I hate his fans.

[max1461]

Honestly as much as I'm like "I appreciate media that is unabashedly horny", which is true, anime fan service is often a bit too much for me just on the level of like, my own taste. Uh it just comes across as crass and tacky a lot, it makes the work more difficult for me to enjoy.

I also think the argument that it's like, often problematic objectification is not wrong. Maybe that's obvious. But like, well, there's something subtle (or sometimes, not so subtle) which makes the difference for me between "media that feels horny in a 'fair' way" and "media which feels horny in 'gross' or 'gawking' way". Those are both poor terms but like, sexualized in a way that feels...

Well there's no easy line for me to draw here. There's nothing specifically that you can't do in work, IMO, there's basically no line that I'm like "categorically you can't cross that". But I do think you should be at least somewhat aware of the ideas your work is conveying about sexuality and society and so on.

Uh maybe what I mean is just "have tact". Like I don't mean "never try to titillate the audience", and I don't mean "all your titillation must sufficiently be subversive of social norms to be allowed", or whatever. Lots of people who say the thing I said in the last paragraph mean one of those things. But I don't. I just mean don't be a dumbass, maybe? I mean something. I mean be aware that like, while I don't a priori object to a work in which every female character's boobs flap around simply because the creator finds it hot, there are certain works where you really should not do that. You see? Things have to be... contextually appropriate, and I mean both the work's internal context but also its context in society as a whole. Right, because of social conditions, and you know, the way that women are treated, and shit, well you're all smart you all know, there's certain contexts in which it is not appropriate to have all the female characters have their boobs flop around. And many more contexts where it's sort of fine it just makes the work a bit worse.

Idk.

Cause like. There's some anime, actually a lot of it, that's just ridiculously straight-guy-horny and I'm just like "you know what, this is fine actually, this is great. I have zero problem with this." And then there's a lot that has all the same shit in it and I'm like "oof, that feels really inappropriate. That feels like a shitty portrayal, an insensitive thing to include, that's bad."

And the different is not the nature of the panty shots themselves it's everything around the panty shots, right. Does that make sense?

I feel like the is kind of the sensible synthesis of recent (and IMO correct) trends around like, idk, pro-horniness? Like sex positivity already means a specific thing but like, pro-horniness, you know, pro-desire (many people on this website are talking about such thing, and again I think correctly), with the IMO also true and important fact that like, objectification of women and so on is a real thing in media and it is actually problematic (I mean "problematic" in the naive sense, not as SJ jargon). Like maybe it's not problematic in the exact set of ways 2014 pop-feminism or anti-porn radfems or whatever say it is, but it's like. There are contexts in which I think you really probably should not be zooming in on the boobs and so on. Like, you feel me?

[flowerandblood]

The Pearl and the Sapphire (4)

[ modern! • Aemond x Baratheon! • female ]

[ warnings: sex content, oral sex, fingering, smut, angst, sexual tension, obsession ]

[ description: As a representative of a large family-owned gemstone business, Aemond is attending a major jewellery event where jewellery makers from all over the world are exhibiting. One of them is the Baratheon family. Aemond is tasked with focusing on attracting new customers, but his attention is diverted by the youngest daughter of the eminent maker Borros Baratheon. Slow burn, bitchy, possessive and obsessive Aemond, lots of dark angst and sexual tension. ]

A story which is an alternative universe of The Impossbile Choice taking place in modern times. The characters are all the same as in the main series, however, for obvious reasons they will behave differently and experience things differently from medieval times. You can read this without having to delve into the main series.

Series moodboard: Aemond & Miss Baratheon

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Previous and next chapters: Masterlist

______

As soon as she entered his room she wondered in her slightly unsober mind what she was actually doing. She watched as he took two wine glasses out of the kitchen cupboard and walked towards the open living room, while she thought strenuously about whether he would add something to her drink if she just went to the toilet for a moment.

She knew nothing about him.

He was a stranger to her.

She was snapped out of her reverie by his low voice, the look in his healthy eye dark and expectant.

"What does he want from you?" He asked directly, without any warning, as if they had known each other forever, and he was her friend to whom she was about to tell her heartfelt dilemmas.

She swallowed quietly at the thought, moving slowly towards the couch and sat down on it. Targaryen immediately sat down next to her, but not too close, allowing her to keep her distance. He poured what was left in the bottle into their glasses, waiting patiently for her response.

With a trembling hand, she opened her clutch bag and took out her phone. She unlocked it and began to read the messages she had received from Cregan.

She swallowed loudly, struggling to hold back tears, locking the screen back, putting the phone again in her purse. She couldn't believe in what she just read, her heart pounding like crazy, her head humming from the wine and stress.

She had spent so many months getting herself together, to accept the fact that he didn't want her, and now he claimed he had changed his mind?

"Question for question." She said abruptly, looking at him tiredly. She recognised that if she was to externalise herself to him, he had to reciprocate.

They knew nothing about each other.

He looked at her intensely for a moment, indecision painted on his face. He was apparently considering all the pros and cons, but in the end he grunted and nodded. She looked down at her hands.

"My ex-boyfriend wanted to be my friend. Months later, when I finally got myself together, he decided he had made a mistake. That maybe we should get back together after all." She choked out with difficulty, reaching for her glass and taking a loud sip from it. She saw that he moved restlessly, playing with his fingers stretched out on his knee, tense. She felt he wanted to say something, but she didn't give him the chance.

"You and the woman you were with at the banquet. Are you two together?" She asked uncertainly, arranging herself comfortably on the sofa, taking a sip of wine, looking at him intently. She saw his whole body tense up, he wasn't looking at her but ahead.

"No." He replied coolly, immediately pressing his glass to his lips.

"Why did you break up?" He asked almost immediately, and she twisted in her seat feeling her heart pounding.

She felt shame.

Why did they break up?

Because she was insufficient?

Because he wasn't ready?

She lifted her legs and tucked them under her thighs, changing positions slightly and sighed quietly.

"He wanted to have some more fun." She said quietly, feeling him give her a sudden, surprised look and move as if he wanted to say something.

"Are you sleeping with her?" She asked suddenly, looking down at her glass, which she held in her hands.

She needed to know.

She needed to know who she was dealing with.

He was silent for too long for her to realise what his answer would be.

"Yes." He said, but there was a kind of withdrawal and uncertainty in his voice that surprised her, as if he really didn't want to admit it.

She looked at him thoughtfully recognising that he was a very insecure man hiding behind a mask of indifference and coldness. She concluded that there was no point in her trying to understand him or his relationship. She opened her mouth wanting to ask at last the question that had been pressing on her lips since she had entered his room.

"Why did you want us to come here?"

He looked at her horrified and went pale, swallowing loudly, twisting uncertainly in his seat, looking away. She pressed her lips together, feeling that they both subconsciously knew answer to this question.

She thought that there was nothing wrong with what they wanted. Since he claimed he wasn't in a relationship with his assistant, and she wasn't in a relationship with Cregan, they were free people.

She looked at him, at his scarred cheek, at his artificial eye. She looked at his jaw, at his nose, his mouth, his hair. He was handsome, he was dark, cold.

She thought he attracted her.

“You can say it. It’s okay.” She said quietly and softly, wanting him to know that she wasn't judging or condemning him, that she appreciated how honest he was with her. She knew what she could count on and what she couldn't and it gave her a kind of security.

She saw him lick his lips nervously and move his shoulders, swallowing hard without looking at her, playing with the glass in his hand.

“I want it.” He whispered almost silently, his lower lip trembling as he spoke the words.

She lowered her gaze at his words, embarrassed, feeling her insides pulsate involuntarily at the very thought of what could happen between them. She lifted her gaze to him and, seeing that he still couldn't look at her, she set her glass down, moving closer to him, sitting on her knees.

She saw him look at her surprised and horrified as she grasped his large hand gently, her thumb running gently over his soft skin. They were both warm from the alcohol and the tension. She saw him swallow quietly, then lean back and set his glass down on the table.

He looked at her as if hesitating, and after surprising her by grasping her face in his hands, he moved closer to her, looking at her with slightly parted lips.

Only now could she see his scar more clearly, his glassy, artificial eye and the healthy one looking at her with a hazy, dark gaze.

She thought she was not afraid of him.

That she wanted to touch him.

When he leaned towards her she moved closer to him, their lips brushed uncertainly, tentatively. They both sighed and kissed again, just as gently, unhurriedly, as if to see if they liked the feeling, his lips firm and warm, tasting of wine. She threw her arms around his neck and he purred into her mouth, emboldened by the gesture.

Only now did she feel that he was much bigger than her, taller even than Cregan, she had the feeling that he encircled her whole person and she felt safe with that thought.

"– I want to taste you –" He whispered and she felt a powerful shudder, her insides clenching helplessly around nothing. "– will you let me? –"

She felt shame at the thought of how much she wanted this.

She couldn't hide what was happening between her legs. As soon as he slipped her underwear off her thighs he could see what his words, his temper and his appearance were doing to her. He touched her leaking entrance gently, watching carefully for her reactions. She shuddered and moaned helplessly, delicate and hypersensitive.

He did what he wanted with her, teasing her clit with his thumb while sinking his finger into her hot entrance once in a while. She breathed loudly, trying to meet his expectations and answer his questions.

"− what made you so wet? − hm? − messages from your ex? −" He hissed, his finger sliding in and out of her with a perverted, sticky click of her own wetness. He tightened his lips as soon as she squirmed at his words, turning her head away, writhing beneath him.

"− answer me −"

"− no −" She mumbled with difficulty, and he hummed under his breath with the satisfaction, leaning between her thighs. She couldn't stand his subtle caresses, she hadn't expected him to be so gentle, the tip of his tongue teasing her entrance and clit, barely slipping in between her folds.

"− I fucking knew it − I knew you would taste wonderful −" He exhaled, pressing his nose against her warm womanhood. His tongue slided suddenly into her swollen, fleshy interior, licking her shamelessly, her hands tightened involuntarily on his hair pressing him closer, a quiet mewling came out of her mouth.

She was horrified at how close she had come to fulfilment, at how easily he had brought her body to such a state.

When she came on his face she lost touch with reality completely for a moment, panting loudly, clenching her eyes shut, the tickling heat spreading throughout her body, loosening her muscles.

She looked up at him sleepily when she heard the sound of fabric being unfastened and saw that his hands were at his zipper, his pupil dilated, his gaze thirsty and hot.

"You still want this?"

She nodded.

She let him carry her onto his bed, his arms holding her gently and tenderly. She hugged his neck and felt a pleasant buzz in her head as he laid her down on the sheets. She swallowed loudly as she watched him put a condom on his swollen, hard manhood and pressed her lips together at the thought of actually doing it.

She felt her insides pulsate again at the thought.

Her heart was pounding like crazy.

He leaned over her, his gaze full of something she couldn't name. It was dark, murky, but warm at the same time, full of affect, although she didn't know why. For some reason she sensed he would not be violent towards her and she felt a momentary relaxation.

"– already during the show I was wondering how to get you into my bed – how tight and hot you must be inside –" He exhaled, guiding the tip of his cock against her hypersensitive entrance. She opened her mouth, drawing in a deep breath at his words.

Already during the show I was wondering how to get you into my bed.

That's why he was looking at her like that.

She felt a strong shudder pass through her at the thought.

When she felt him inside her she closed her eyes, sighing with effort and relief at the same time. He was big and pulsating, pushing her tight walls to their limits, making it hard for her to catch her breath. He looked at her as if he couldn't believe they were really doing this, his lips parted in an accelerated breath.

They both moaned in surprise at as he began to move inside her, slowly at first, as if he wanted to savour this moment and the feeling of her throbbing, warm walls.

After a moment, his hips began to accelerate, stretching her insides to the limit, pulsing on him with desire. She had already forgotten how wonderfully pleasurable it was, her lips parted in accelerated gasps each time he rubbed the point inside her that made her hot.

"− oh, baby −" He exhaled, speeding up, entering her with a loud, wet slap of flesh against flesh, looking at her with an expression of delight on his face.

She wasn't sure if Cregan had ever looked at her like that.

She felt her insides tighten around his length at that thought, with every thrust he made, the slap of his thighs against her buttocks, it felt better and better, as if she realised that she really did want this.

She wanted him.

She touched his cheek with her palm as he leaned down and kissed her tenderly, deeply, devotedly, pressing his forehead against hers.

"− you like it when someone takes care of you, don't you? − when someone fucks you properly −" He gasped fucking her faster and faster, she felt the whole bed creak beneath them, his hands clenched tightly on her hips, his body focused only on pushing his cock into her again and again.

She felt the heat in her lower abdomen reach its zenith again, a mewling sound erupted from her mouth that was also meant to be a pathetic confirmation of his words, her lips parted wide.

"− I'm gonna cum now, okay? − I'm gonna cum inside my sweet little girl −" He exhaled and she nodded quickly, feeling his words between her thighs, sensing that her fulfilment was rapidly approaching, that just a few more of his movements and she would come again.

"− oh, yes, please −" She mumbled, feeling his hand begin to tease her clit again.

They both moaned loudly into each other's mouths, feeling each other's orgasms, she heard him sigh helplessly as he felt her core clench violently against him again and again, his cock twitching and pulsing inside her in fulfilment.

Looking misty-eyed at his face, at his clenched eyes, feeling his nose pressed against her cheek, his lips trailing over hers, his trembling hot breath enveloping her skin, some part of her regretted that he had to use a condom, that she couldn't feel his semen inside her. She blushed at the thought, panting loudly, embarrassed at the idea.

They stroked each other's faces with their palms, breathing fast and trembling all over, trying to calm each other down, when suddenly someone started pounding on his door with their fist.

"Aemond? What the fuck? Who the fuck are you in there with?" She heard a raised, distraught female voice and looked at him with big eyes, horror on his face, he shook his head quickly, his mouth formed the voiceless words 'be quiet'.

"Aemond!" The woman started pounding on the door and pawing at the handle, she felt her whole body start to quiver, she sobbed quietly. He laid on top of her and embraced her as if he wanted to comfort her and protect her from what was happening.

"You fucking bastard! Are you fucking this little girl? This little slut? God fucking damn you! How could you do this to me!" She heard her angry voice followed by sobs. She herself began to cry hearing it, in her head the words she had spoken.

Are you fucking this little girl?

This little slut?

Why did she feel like a whore if they weren't together?

"What have we done?" She asked in a terrified whisper, feeling his lips pressed against her temple.

"Shhh." He hushed her by stroking her head, she could feel his heart pounding hard.

He was as terrified as she was.

She cried out quietly in his arms hearing her for a moment longer, and then she heard someone in the distance open and close the door loudly.

Complete silence ensued.

She swallowed loudly, his hand steadily stroking her head snuggled into the hollow of his neck, only after a moment did she realise he was still deep inside her.

Seconds later he lifted himself up on his elbows, glancing down at her most likely to see what state she was in. She could see that he was also shaken, both of them looking at each other breathing unevenly.

"You can sleep here if you want. I'll give you my shirt." He said uncertainly and she blinked, her lips slightly parted in disbelief.

He was proposing that she stay with him for the night.

Probably through remorse.

She shook her head and saw that an expression of disappointment flashed across his face, his jaw clenched tightly, his nostrils moved anxiously.

"I can't. I'll be up all night dreading that she's coming here again. I won't sleep a wink." She explained in a trembling voice, wanting him to know that this wasn't about him. He swallowed loudly at her words and nodded, then slowly pulled himself out of her.

She gasped in discomfort and clenched her eyes shut, feeling a sudden chill and emptiness inside her, his hand stroking her cheek reassuringly.

"Shhh. Wait here a minute, okay? Don't go anywhere." He said pulling up his trousers and getting out of bed to disappear into the bathroom a moment later. She sat on his bed only now feeling that her whole body was shaking from stress, her eyes burning from crying.

A minute later he came out of the toilet, a wet towel and a glass of water in his hand. He handed it to her, his hand with the damp material slipped between her thighs. She clenched them, frightened, but he looked at her calmly.

"Let me. I don't want you to leave my room in this condition." He said lowly, and she felt a warmth spread over her heart that she didn't want to feel at all.

She relaxed her hips and felt the warm, wet towel wipe her clean of all her sticky juices, bringing her relief and comfort. She involuntarily took a few deep sips of water from the glass feeling her throat dry up after what had happened.

As soon as he finished he rose and she stood up with him, covering her thighs with her dress, moving on shaky legs towards the sofa to get her underwear, putting it on quickly. She felt him watching her alertly as she picked up her clutch bag and his briefcase of documents.

As she moved towards the entrance, putting on her shoes quickly, he followed her, doing the same as she did.

"What are you doing?" She asked surprised, fatigue, terror and alcohol mixing in her head.

"You don't think I'm going to let her catch you alone in a corridor somewhere after that scene, do you?" He asked coolly, and she swallowed loudly.

She saw him quietly grab the doorknob and open the door silently, leaning his head out, looking around. He nodded for her to follow him and they both started for the stairs, not wanting to wait in plain sight for the lift.

They climbed to her floor and only then did she feel relieved. However, they both froze and stopped in mid-step when they saw her father emerge suddenly from his room, apparently heading for her brother's apartment.

When he saw her, her tear-stained face his brow furrowed in a way she knew all too well, his accusing gaze falling on the Targaryen standing beside her.

"What happened?" He asked expectantly, she could feel her heart pounding hard, she thought she had to think of something quickly.

"Cregan has been nagging me all day and I felt bad during our conversation. Mr Aemond was kind enough to offer to walk me to my room to make sure I was okay." She mumbled being on the verge of crying again, looking at her father pleadingly.

He muttered under his breath and nodded at Targaryen, putting his arm around her and saying 'thank you for your concern'.

Before she entered her room she glanced at him apologetically over her shoulder, their tired gazes meeting for a moment before he turned and started down the corridor in the other direction.

Her father began to question her about what was going on and ordered her to show him what messages Cregan was sending his daughter. Feeling that she needed to somehow make her story credible she showed him textes she had been receiving from him throughout the day.

"Couldn't he finally decide on something? Why is he messing with your head like that? I'll talk to his father when we get back." He said angrily, ignoring her pleas for him not to do so and that they were no longer children in kindergarten. When her father left, angry and shaken, she called Royce quickly.

He was in her room after a few minutes.

He walked in smiling, but seeing her state and her red eyes he immediately furrowed his brow, looking at her anxiously.

"What's wrong? Cregan?" He asked walking up to her, putting his hands on her shoulders, as usual physically showing her his support. She pressed her lips together at his questions.

"Not only that." She whispered with a blush of embarrassment and shame not believing what she was about to say.

"I slept with someone." She mumbled, burying her face in her hands, shaking her head. Her brother threw her a confused yet amused look.

"Well… I told you to have fun. I just hope he didn't hurt you? Do you regret it?" He asked bending down to her level as if to see what the look in his eyes betrayed. She looked at him helplessly, lowering her hands.

"I slept with Aemond Targaryen…"

"WHAT?"

"…and when it was all over his assistant, who he is sleeping with but is not in a relationship with, started banging on our door when she heard us, screaming and crying." She mumbled out quickly on one exhale, wiping quickly the tears that were again flying down her cheeks, her brother looking at her in disbelief. He ran his hand through his hair, shaking his head.

"I, God, this is totally fucked up. If they're not together then why did she make him a scene?" He asked rhetorically.

"I have no idea! Maybe there's more to her than that though. She was already looking at me at breakfast after I exchanged a few words with him and I'm afraid she knows it's me. That she's going to say something to our father." She said in a trembling voice, Royce pressed his lips together.

"Has she seen you?" He asked uncertainly.

"No, but our father saw me and Aemond when he walked me to my room. He wanted to make sure this woman didn't catch me anywhere. I told him he only saw me off." She explained brokenly, seeing her brother's horrified gaze.

He let out a loud breath, burying his face in his hands as if he felt immense relief. He put his hands at his sides, looking at her with a mixture of awe and disbelief.

"Well, my little sister, I see that when you do have fun, you do it with pomp." He said amused and she burst into laughter at his words, somewhat relaxed by the fact that she had told him, that she didn't have to carry this burden alone.

Before bed she took a quick shower, wanting to refresh herself after what they had done. She realised to her surprise, standing under the drops of hot water falling on her body, that she didn't regret what she had done after all.

She couldn't erase his touch, tell herself that it hadn't been pleasant, that it hadn't given her pleasure.

She thought, sighing, that they were both adults, they had done what they wanted, and now their paths would part and everything would go back to normal. She thought she would call Cregan tomorrow and explain to him exactly how she felt, and if that didn't work, she would just block his number for a while.

She came out of the bathroom in her pyjamas and involuntarily reached for her phone wanting to see if Cregan had written anything else. She was surprised when she saw that she had received some direct message on Instagram from a strange account, but it didn't look like spam. She opened it and started reading.

She swallowed loudly feeling her heart pounding.

A.

Aemond.

She felt relieved and hot in her lower abdomen at the thought that he had found her, that he had made the effort just to write her that.

She knew that he must have seen that she had displayed the message and she didn't want him to feel that she was pretending that nothing had happened. She took a long time to respond and deleted and rephrased several times.

She felt a shudder when she saw that he had immediately displayed her message and wondered if he would write anything more. She felt a stab of disappointment when nothing appeared after a few minutes but decided it was still nice of him to write to her.

She shuddered when she heard the sound of a vibration, a notification displayed on her phone that she had received a new message on Instagram. She unlocked her phone with her heart pounding hard, wondering why it excited her so much.

She thought maybe it was because he seemed so withdrawn, dark, silent, and now he was talking to her of his own free will.

She pursed her lips as she read this and swallowed loudly.

He opened up to her.

He talked about his relationship.

She rolled over on her sheets, sitting up, thinking deeply about what she should answer to that. She didn't want to judge him or ask too in-depth questions, but she wanted to understand him.

She finally replied, her heart tightening.

Will this answer upset him? Was she too direct? She flinched as her phone vibrated again.

A short, cold answer. She swallowed loudly, sighing softly, not knowing whether she should write more or not.

She pursed her lips as she read this. Somehow their relationship was as complicated as hers and Cregan's. She wondered if she should advise him something.

She blinked, feeling her heart pounding hard.

Exchange of mutual benefits.

Objectification.

Had he done this to her today to make her go easy on his grandfather's deal and convince her father to sign it?

She swallowed hard at the thought.

He didn't answer her question for a very long time and she slowly started to fall asleep in her bed. She suddenly jumped up when her screen lit up after several minutes.

She pursed her lips as she read the messages that appeared quickly one after the other. She thought he had finished the rest of the wine that was left in his room.

She fell asleep almost immediately after sending the message, the alcohol numbed her completely and made her not wake up until the morning. She flinched when the alarm on her phone started ringing and she turned it off, glancing at the display. She saw then that she had received another message from him.

______

Taglist

@its-actually-minicika @notnormalthings-blog @nikstrange @zenka69 @bellaisasleep @k-y-r-a-1 @g-cf2020 @melsunshine @opheliaas-stuff @chainsawsangel @iiamthehybrid @tinykryptonitewerewolf @namoreno @malfoytargaryen @qyburnsghost @aemondsdelight @persephonerinyes @fan-goddess @sweethoneyblossom1 @watercolorskyy @astral-blossoms @randomdragonfires @apollonshootafar @padfooteyes @darylandbethfanforever9 @fudge13 @snh96 @rwdkarla @echos-muses @ipostwhtifeel @letmeloveyouuuu @yentroucnagol @valeskafics @tempt-ress @ahristata @menaosama @queenofshinigamis @dark-night-sky-99 @kate-to-the-ki @travelingmypassion @summerposie

[red-velvet-0w0]

INTRO POST

post status: free

Im just a silly little person with an ocean obsession who lives in your phone.

My names are Erin/Eris/Red

She/They preferred, but you can call me anything so long as it is NOT he/him (on the same note, if you call me man/dude/bro/guy I will flood your house)

Im a minor (17 years old), and am enby/trans, poly, and a Massive Lesbian, and also probably demiromantic? idk about that last one im still trying to figure that out

im definitely neurodivergent but im not entirely sure what all I have going on up in here (definitely undiagnosed ADHD, probably a lot of other things too)

American/Californian

If you're a terf, a homophobe, or a pedophile: go away please okay? Otherwise pretty much anybody is welcome here so long as you arent hurting anybody

silly DNIs: Dante Alighieri, Jean-Paul Sartre, Albert Camus, Wacław Franciszek Sierpiński (they know what they did)

Im pro-palestine

Im an artist, animator, and a game designer (i have a youtube and an itch.io page but neither of them have much on them) (im uh. not quite as good at finishing projects as i am at starting them)

my 2 alt accounts are @red-gamedev-0w0 and my vent blog (only for frends eyes) (dm if you want the link)

my DMs, asks, and anons are always open if you wanna be silly, and honestly it really makes my day when i get a message. boundaries and norms for talking to me are at the very bottom

i have a silly little OC universe im hoping to turn into a webcomic eventualy (hopefully)

I AM VERY STRONGLY AGAINST AI ART. (and just. generative AI in general) (yes that includes chat gpt and character AI)

I am... incredibly normal about the ocean. I have healthy and reasonable emotions I feel when i think about it. dont question why "erins ocean posting" is one of my most used tags its totaly healthy trust me (is it a religious thing? a sexual thing? a gender thing? you will literaly never know)

The fandoms im in are: Tiger Tiger, Roblox Pressure (Sebastian Solace), Aurora Webcomic, The Killers, Tom Cardy, The Mechanisms, Life Series, Hermitcraft, Parkour Civ, Mineraft, Marble Hornets, Terraria, Hollow Knight, Celeste, Hades, Camp Here And There, Murder Drones, The Art of Murder, The Magnus Podcasts, Epic the Musical, Hello From the Hallowoods, Witherburn After School News, Dont Hug Me Im Scared, The Locked Tomb, Hatchetfield, Centaurworld, Amphibia, Epithet Erased, Kid Vampire, and Bigtop Burger (+ a few more but those are the ones you'll see the most of) (Red means highly likely to post about it, purple means very unlikely to post about it often)

#1 Killers fan (their best album is Sams Town and the best song is Bones and thats a fact)

i also sometimes rant about spanish literature sometimes but thats a rare occasion

Id love to be friends, enemies, or really anything in between if you let me.

Tags I use (in case you want to block them):

#erins cryptic ramblings (generic tag)

#erins ocean posting (for ocean related posts)

#axe and erins dnd bullshit (for when im talking about dnd with one of my mutuals)

#the forever day (my OCs/potentialy hopefully a webcomic im working on??? hopefully well see how far that goes)

#erin answers asks (self explanitory)

#erin talks about life /#erin rants about life (also self explanitory)

#erins tumblr ad saga (my compilation of all the worst ads this hellsite has to offer)

BOUNDERIES, NORMS, AND RULES OF THUMB FOR TALKING TO ME:

No horny/vaguely sexual messages unless 1) we are friends, 2) you are under 18, and 3) you have asked me directly in the past whether i am comfortable with that sort of thing or are otherwise aware that i am comfortable with you talking to me like that

Avoid using male terms as much as possible (ie. guy, dude, man, bro), and id prefer avoiding gendered terms as much as possible, but when you have the choice female terms are prefered (ie. girl). i may refer to myself using male gendered terms from time to time but that does not give you permision to

Do not EVER use the r-slur on me.

Do not EVER say "KYS" or anything of that nature to me, even as a joke

If you send me hate mail of any kind i will either just delete it or if ill just mock you. nothing you can say will ever be as hateful as the stuff my brain says to me on a daily basis so dont bother

If i say i dont want to talk about something, i dont want to talk about it.

Nicknames and terms of endearment (ie. dear, love, bestie) are fine from friends, so long as you have cleared with me that I am fine with you calling me that

I have a tendancy to be VERY flirty with some of my friends, but just know that i almost certainly mean it entirely platonicaly, unless i specificaly tell you i mean it in a different way. Even something like "i want to make out with you" can be platonic coming from me, so in general dont assume im flirting with you (likewise if you ARE actualy flirting with me be warned that I will not realize in the slightest and you will have to be very clear that you are actualy flirting because there is no other way i will ever know)

If i am saying something nice to you, it is genuine. period. i would never lie to you about something like that. if i tell you i care about you, its not out of pity or out of some strange malice. its because i care about you

you are ALWAYS welcome and encouraged to talk to me, especialy if you are feeling sad or at risk of hurting yourself. Even if we have barely talked, if you need somebody to talk to or rant to I am always here for you.

And that’s about it!

Nice to meet you!

[emilykaldwen]

THE MAIDEN AND THE DROWNING BOY is a House of the Dragon canon divergent fix-it trilogy with a HEA. Meshing both show and book canon, the story asks the question: How do you stop the cycles of abuse and generational trauma? In this universe, Aegon marries the youngest daughter of Lyonel Strong, the Lady Abrogail, who has grown up alongside him and his siblings. The story begins with the run up to their marriage in 125 AC, and follows Aegon and Abrogail as they figure out who they are and who they are together in the Riverlands, along with Aemond and Helaena in King's Landing, and to the dawn of the Dance of Dragons. Except the ending of the song is different this time.

pairings: aegon ii targaryen x oc, eventual jacaerys x helaena, other canon ships mentioned, other pairings to be announced warnings: suicidal ideation, sexual shame and purity pushing, canon typical violence, canon typical attitudes, unpacking of previously stated sexual shame/purity for both male and female characters

This is not an anti/pro team black or green fic. I continue to do my best to approach all sides with nuance. There will be no bashing, nor will I accept any in the comments.

[this fic series will have three separate parts and maintains an 'at least once a month' posting schedule (due to life reasons)]

No Tag List. Follow @emkald-fic and turn on post notifications or subscribe on AO3.

Tumblr: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Chapter Eleven | Chapter Twelve | Chapter Thirteen | Chapter Fourteen | Chapter Fifteen | Chapter Sixteen | Chapter Seventeen | Chapter Eighteen | Chapter Nineteen | Chapter Twenty | Chapter Twenty-One | Chapter Twenty-Two | Chapter Twenty-Three | Twenty-Four | Twenty-Five

AO3: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight | Chapter Nine | Chapter Ten | Chapter Eleven | Chapter Twelve | Chapter Thirteen | Chapter Fourteen | Chapter Fifteen | Chapter Sixteen | Chapter Seventeen | Chapter Eighteen | Chapter Nineteen | Chapter Twenty | Chapter Twenty-One | Chapter Twenty-Two | Chapter Twenty-Three | Twenty-Four | Twenty-Five

AO3

Wattpad (for those who prefer to read there. Updates are not matched to AO3)

Fic Tag

Ship Tag

Abrogail Tag

Spoiler Free Family Tree

Timeline of Events (please note the adjusted ages from the source material)

Abrogail Epithet Gif Set

Arc One Promo Set

Aegon and Abby - A Soft Evening Commission by @winterofherdiscontent

Aegon and Abby - A Lazy Morning by @debustee

Abrogail Commission by @astarionbae

Fanart/Content by others - If you made something for this fic, please @ me and tag #useremka

Abrogail Fanart by @selfproclaimedunicorn

Abrogail Fanart by @murmel-malt

Sunlight Gif Set by @dragonsbone

Vampire!Abby x Aegon fanart by @murmel-malt

Aegon and Abby Dancing by @murmel-malt

Abby Moodboard by @rainwingmarvel7

Abby Dress designs by @chic-beyond-the-wall-oc-acct

Abby Portrait commissioned by a follower and art by @shripscapi

Aegon and Abby as Eros and Psyche by @murmel-malt

Transformative Works Policy below the cut

Transformative Works Policy: I do not give my permission to have this work put into generative AI or cross-posted somewhere else under your name. If you are looking to translate my work, please contact me first. Translations are ONLY allowed on AO3 following their translation policy, or Ficbook. Podfic is also allowed as long as I am contacted first to discuss.

As of right now, @vampire-exgirlfriend, @selfproclaimedunicorn, @darkwolf76, and @queen--kenobi only have permission to utilize Abrogail Strong in their works. If you want to write something inspired by or utilize my OCs in any way, please reach out to me first.