#pomoromantic Pride

[mytho-cave]

Calling all pomoromantic’s and pomosexual!

So I kinda realized for the people who like me are both pomosexual and pomoromantic don’t have actual flags for if you’re both because I just thought about having a flag for if you’re both would be very nice so here!

The Pomosexual and Pomoromantic flag! You still can technically use the original two but if you just want to use this for if you’re both go ahead!

[ballsalsda]

I have got to CHILL with the pride flags 😭

[bloomshroomz]

Aromantic*

(Alternate Title: Shrödinger’s Romantic)

I keep wondering if “aromantic” is really a good word to describe my romantic orientation. I have plenty of reasons for why it is, but also plenty of reasons for why it might not be. Shrödinger’s romantic.

In order to know whether you experience romantic attraction or not, you first have to have a solid definition of what romantic attraction is. A definition which is clear, and also distinct from other forms of emotional attraction. I don’t think such a definition exists, or at least, it’s not commonplace.

“Romantic attraction: attraction that makes people desire romantic contact or interaction with another person or persons.” - UNC Chapel Hill LGBT Center

But what is romantic contact or interaction? Is it contact which is culturally considered romantic? In that case, the ways in which romantic attraction is defined would vary by culture, and even by gender. Or is it contact which one intends to be romantic? That would make sense, but is incredibly subjective. How do you know where to draw the line? What if you haven’t drawn one?

“[Romantic attraction] involves a combination of physical, sexual, and emotional feelings toward someone.” - WebMD

This definition is ridiculously vague, especially for a page which defines multiple other types of attraction in relation to romance. What physical feelings? What sexual feelings? What emotional feelings? What about alloromantic asexual people, or other varioriented people, who don’t necessarily experience sexual feelings as part of their romantic feelings?

But the article also defines aromanticism as “when you don’t have any desire for a romantic relationship,” so I can’t count on it for accuracy regardless.

“Romantic attraction is the internal pull that you experience when you are with someone with whom you internally feel connected, comfortable and interested in spending more of your life with.” - Choosing Therapy

Do people not feel connected to their friends? Do people not feel comfortable with their friends? Are people not interested in spending more of their life with their friends? Why else would people find time to connect with their friends, to confide in them, to engage with them? What about these feelings is distinctly romantic?

The article goes on to say this:

“Romantic relationships are relationships intentionally initiated and maintained for experiencing sexual and romantic feelings together, whereas platonic relationships are usually centered on another purpose like hobbies, friendship, support, work, etc. Romantic relationships can also include these purposes as well, but the platonic relationship excludes the romance and sexual feelings.” - Choosing Therapy

I ask again, what about alloaces and other varioriented people? What about people who have sex with their friends? Even when it’s taboo, it’s not unheard of. The distinction can’t be sex, so it has to be romance. So, what is romance?

Later in the article, it defines romance once again:

“Romantic attraction: The internal pull that draws your attention to the other person’s positive qualities, and your internal reaction to connect, love, share and spend time with them to have more romance.” - Choosing Therapy

I feel like I’m running in circles here. People draw their attention to the positive qualities of not just romantic interests, but to friends, family, and other people with whom they’d have no romantic interest. Connection, love, and spent time are not exclusive to romance either. If the goal is to have more romance… What is that?

Every answer I find fails to say what romance is on its own. The definitions always rely on presence or absence of sex, or other things which can just as easily be present in platonic or otherwise non-romantic contexts. Romantic attraction is consistently defined by things which are not distinctly romantic.

Is it even a real thing? I mean, I feel like it’s clearly not, but it’s also clearly very real to most people. Most people don’t think about it this hard. It’s like they were given a manual that I can never possess. It comes naturally to them. They feel romantic attraction, and they know, intuitively, that that’s what it is.

Is my lack of intuition evidence that I don’t experience romantic attraction, or am I just autistic? Maybe it’s both. When I described to my aunts my emotional attraction, they described my way of experiencing and perceiving attraction as very “intellectual,” which I initially rejected. But I think they were right. I lack the intuition to understand my feelings in any way that doesn’t involve a literal or metaphorical chart. It’s something I can’t just feel and then know like other people do.

Is romantic attraction always a “you’ll know it when you feel it” sort of thing? It seems like it. Even when I search “romantic attraction” on Google, many results either come from queer Fandom Wiki pages, discussions amongst a-spec people, Reddit, or Quora. Some results aren’t even relevant to the question, including multiple results which just describe what “aromantic” means. The opposite of what I intended to search for.

The thing is, I do have feelings which would likely be perceived as romantic to most people. I have a deep desire for commitment and companionship. To touch and be touched. To love and be loved. To be emotionally and physically intimate with other people. To feel the warmth of other people as we lay in bed together. To live out our mundane lives together. Things that most people would find incredibly romantic.

But are these things romantic if I don’t explicitly intend for them to be? Is it romantic for me to be open to it being romantic, without actively wanting that?

When I’ve described my feelings online, I’ve gotten mixed responses from other people, but I’ve generally been given similar advice from different strangers, and similar labels thrown at me, even when I hadn’t asked for advice or labels.

“I think you’d enjoy a queerplatonic relationship.”

“You might be cupioromantic.”

“You might be bellusromantic.”

And I can understand where they’re coming from. I don’t think they’re entirely wrong, either. I would enjoy a queerplatonic relationship… But not for any reason that wouldn’t apply to other committed relationship types. Queerplatonic relationships, platonic relationships, romantic relationships, and whatever else there is are the same to me in all but label.

Cupioromanticism is something I have considered. I made the flag for it when I was 15 years old as well (yes, the peach one with five stripes; I always asked to be credited anonymously), so I’m biased towards liking the flag. But the definition is “being aromantic, and also wanting a romantic relationship.”

I don’t specifically want a romantic relationship, but I do want committed relationships in general, and romantic relationships are included in that. So, maybe?

Bellusromantic is something I have also considered, and it also has a pretty flag. But I think it’s less accurate than cupioromantic. The definition is “being aromantic, and enjoying traditionally romantic things, but not wanting a romantic relationship (or not wanting a committed relationship, depending on the definition used).”

I do enjoy traditionally romantic things in a way which is not explicitly romantic, and I don’t explicitly want a romantic relationship. But I’m not opposed to romantic relationships, and I do explicitly want committed relationships.

I took some aro-spec tests, and my results had a tendency to skew towards cupioromantic, bellusromantic, and quoiromantic. Quoiromantic is another orientation which I have considered, and it might be the most accurate.

Quoiromantic is also aptly known as “whatromantic” or “WTFromantic” because the defining trait is that romantic attraction as a concept doesn’t make sense to you.

“[Quoiromantic], also known as [whatromantic] or [WTFromantic], is a [romantic] orientation defined by confusion, vagueness, and/or obscurity. A [quoiromantic] person may not understand or relate to the concepts of [romantic] attraction and/or [romantic] orientation. [Quoiromanticism] may involve confusion related to what [romance] is, whether or not one experiences [romantic attraction], and how to differentiate it from other forms of attraction. [Quoiromanticism] can also feel blurry and unclear, and may center around general confusion around one's identity and attraction. It can also refer to a lack of identification with [romantic] orientation as a concept, and can additionally serve as a label for people who cannot fit into more specific identities. [Quoiromanticism] can also refer to when one does not experience [romantic] attraction in a "traditional" manner. It is sometimes used as a catch-all term for people who know they're somewhere on the [aromantic] spectrum, but aren't sure where.” - An LGBTQIA+ Wiki (originally about quoisexuality; I changed some words.)

In a similar vein, pomoromantic (“pomo” being literally taken from “postmodern”) would also fit. My romantic orientation exists from a post-romantic perspective, where romance is understood to be made up bogus which isn’t actually fundamentally different from any other form of emotional connection.

“[Pomoromanticism] is defined as refusing, avoiding, or not fitting any [romantic] orientation label in terms of conventional labels or classifications, such as gay, lesbian, [biromantic], or [aromantic]. It challenges categorizations in favor of largely unmapped possibility and the intense charge that comes with transgression. Some [pomoromantic] people may be queer or questioning, and others may not be.” - Another LGBTQIA+ Wiki (originally about pomosexuality; I changed some words.)

But at that point, is it even worth labeling my romantic orientation? Should I just be bisexual/omnisexual? Maybe with a little asterisk at the end? Does any of this matter? Am I thinking too much? (I am.)

I think that continuing to identify as aromantic will probably close me off to potential relationships. I feel like the word gives people the wrong idea. At the same time, the way that I think about romance is fundamentally different than the way other people tend to, and I do consider my aromanticism to be a notable part of who I am and how I experience the world. Maybe I should just send this to whoever ends up being a potential partner. Probably more useful than any label.

[nebulabasket]

Our primary pride flags

[redacted-coiner]

Apothisexual , Apothiaroace/Apothirose , Apothiromantic

Pomoromantic , Pomoaroace/Pomorose , Pomosexual

Cassexual , Cassaroace/Cassrose , Cassromantic

DNI is listed within my pinned post. Please go read it before interacting with any part of my content. Ask to tag.

More Seen Here

[tricksterchalcedony]

new month new icon! happy pride from your local queer fish :3

[aroworlds]

[image description: four block text banners of the word "aro" in a blockish text, coloured in four different five or seven-stripe aromantic spectrum pride flags. Identities: arovague (green/light green/grey/light green/green), cupiroflux (black/grey/bright lime green/lime green/white/light pink/bright pink), non-SAM aro (dark cyan/cyan/white/dark purple-blue/white/light green/green) and pomoromantic (pink/light pink/white/mint green/white/light pink/pink). Banners are shown in two versions: one on a black background with a white frame, the other with a transparent background.]

Aro Block Text Banners

Flags: Arovague, Cupiroflux, Non-SAM Aro, Pomoromantic.

All banners/stickers are available for free personal or non-commercial use with credit to one of my accounts. They are not available for commercial use.

For flag creator posts, please see @aroflagarchive.

[pomo-positive]

Hi! I'm Years/Eggos! Welcome to this little blog called pomo-positive! 💗 I use she/any pronouns and identify as pomo (pomosexual/pomoromantic). I'm a gnc cis white girl and trans ally! 🏳️‍⚧️🫶

This blog I wanted to make to create a safe place for people who may feel left out or different from queer spaces but aren't cishetero. So pomo, unlabeled, questioning, quioromantic, aroace and aspec, using microlabels or anything of the sorts!

I want this blog to be inclusionsist and respectful 🩷 I'm open to hearing people's experiences and learning! You may request different flags for me to make edits of, and I love hearing character headcanons! Aside from that, I'll be reblogging any nice pride posts I come across 😊

My other blogs:

Main: @years-n-feather

Art & fandom stuff: @eatingsomegreeneggos

Stimblog: @eggos-gifs-and-co

Basic dni, you know who you are. Racists, sexists, lgbtphobes, exclusionists, discourse blogs, nsfw, ect. I will try my best to protect the peace here and will not hesitate to block or report you.

[stimiez]

🌸 • 🌸 • 🌸 • 🤍 • 🤍 • 🤍 • 🪻 • 🪻 • 🪻

[tofu-gaycat]

Hello everyone! Catra’s here, I use any pronouns and im a proud lesbian who fights with compulsory heterosexuality.

This is a smoll introduction to my blog which I’ve started years ago (seriously its been almost two years!)

I’m 18 years old, I study in art college for art historian and do art of my own plus some writing here and there. My personality type is ENTP. I love listening to rock, electronic (especially Hurts) and metal (Rammstein).

My full labels are: Aroallo, (Demiaroace), lesbian, pomoromantic, librafluid and transfem!

Here I will talk about my experiences with sexuality as well as curious life situations plus some mental health advices and stories!

P.S if I know you close, you can call me Tofu :3

P.S 2 Follow me on Pinterest, I post some of my art there plus random LGBT boards! I will always mention if I take something from there for my posts.

~

DNI:

1. Homophobic and transphobic + ableist

2. If you don’t believe in compulsory heterosexuality

3. A man who enjoys lesbian NSFW content (srs wtf it’s disgusting)

4. If you in any way fetishise lesbians

5. Believe that aroallos are predators (NO we ain’t)

6. Hate furries for some reason (yk, each group has bad apples, don’t judge everyone because of them)

7. Support MAPs and ZOOs

8. If you hate catra. I don’t wanna fight with anyone because of that.

9. TERFs (I had enough of you really)

10. Overall aggressive people

~

[gendersodas]

!Pomo Pomo Pomo / Triple Pomo!

Triple Pomo: When you identify as pomogender, pomosexual, and pomoromantic at the same time.

[receivingtranny]

Part 2 of my orientations' pride flags!

Pomoromantic

Queer

Lesbian

Saturnic

T4T/TLT

Gay Furry

Agender

Neogirl

Neurogender

F*ggot

[urfavisaprideflag]

Shion from Len'en Project is the pomoromantic flag!

[vivadisc0rdia]

This is a post describing my gender and sexualities, simply to educated the people ^^

Genderfaun - At least in the way I experience it, keep in mind that it's different for everyone, is basically genderfluidity with the exclusion of female and/or female-spectrum genders. Basically, genderfluid but with no female.

Demiromantic/Demisexual - Only feeling romantic/sexual attraction to people once you've formed a close bond with them. BestFriendsexual, essentially (but they become more; wait-- okay I don't know what I'm saying, moving on)

Pomoromantic/Pomosexual - One of the more lesser known ones! Basically labeless romantic/sexual attraction.

(i.e., "What's your sexuality?" "Oh, I don't have a word for mine, there's no label that fits it. I'm pomosexual[/romantic]")

Thank you for your time 👍

[arcadekitten]

Maybe spoilers for Here For Sweethearts ??? Idk , just talking about Netina’s personality !!

Hiii !! :D so , from what I noticed when I played Here For Sweethearts , Netina is kinda a bully !! ( more than just kinda .. but … yk , i can’t diss on my girl like that !! Hehe :3 ) BUT !!! I still really REALLY love her !! <3 she’s so beautiful and her personality makes me really curious on her backstory ?? Or just more about her in general !!! So can I maybe know some things about her you can think of ?? :3

Also !! I noticed a lot of the characters color pallets / uniforms ( or just lil accessories ) in Here For Sweethearts are the colors of their pride flags !! So , I’m wondering if Netina is Pomoromantic ?? The main colors I noticed on her color pallet are pink/magenta , light pink , light green / chartreuse and white … which is why I thought of that !! I’m Pomoromantic myself so I was really curious !!

Thank you so much for your time !! :,3 it means a lot ! <3

Aw I'm so happy you like her so much!! ♡ She is quite the bully, isn't she?

I think that Netina is someone who harbors a lot of aggression. Unfortunately for others, her outlet for releasing that aggression is taking it out on other people. I think she sees herself as having a lot of these negative emotions and no where to put them, so she finds someone to put them on. I also think it's safe to assume that when Netina chooses to dislike someone for the sake of releasing her own aggression, she starts creating reasons in her head to justify why they deserve such treatment from her. (Ex: "Lots of people seem to find Mary creepy and weird, I'm not the only one, ergo she deserves it")

(She's also totally the kind of person who would see bullies in media and view them as being aspirational--especially when the bullies are portrayed as pretty, rich, and getting everything they want all the time. Who wouldn't want to be like that too?)

Netina's colors on her uniform were just colors I thought were cute!! Also since Netina is a bit of a foil to Mary, I wanted her to have a sort of "opposite-samey" color scheme to her (whites & greens as opposed to blacks & reds). But I'm happy if you are able to connect to her in that way! ♡

[ryanyflags]

If it isn’t too much trouble could you possibly do a combo of the Pomosexual & Asespec flag? or the Pomoromantic & Arospec flag? or both? whichever you prefer!! :D (and if you don’t mind can you specifically use the Pomosexual flag with a purple stripe and the Pomoromantic flag with a green stripe but also put the 4 pointed star symbol from the other pomo flags? Thank you sm!! ^_^)

Pomosexual ace-spec, pomoromantic aro-spec, and pomoaroace aroace-spec combo flags.

I used the pomo- flags with the purple and green stripes, I just didn't put them in the center because I thought the increased contrast from the darker colors looked better.

The aroace-spec flag wasn't requested, but I thought I'd make it too.