#please dont make this a regular habit

[pseudowho]

Random question, during any of your pregnancy’s were you ever insecure about you body, how you were acting, or any of your cravings?

Me and my fiancé were talking about plans for future kids and i’m to scared to ask anyone else. could you give me a small run through of things to expect?

Thank you so much!!

Hey! I'll answer this both as a woman who has done pregnancy and birth three times, and as an experienced midwife. I don't like the 'horror story' sharing that many women do around pregnancy; it muddies the waters, and is supremely anxiety-inducing for anyone who is pregnant while hearing it.

You need to know I could write, and have written, essays on this.

As a midwife: Pregnancy is this period of unique physiological change in your body and mind, that even when it is normal (i.e. normal symptoms, not a sign of an unwell pregnancy) can be profound and lifelong.

These normal symptoms, including but not limited to nausea and vomiting (commonly referred to as morning sickness, though present at any time of day), weight gain, swelling, congestion, mood changes, appetite changes, stretch marks, heartburn and hip/joint pain, can range from barely present/absent, to severe.

Even severe pregnancy symptoms aren't always considered abnormal unless they're making you unwell (i.e. unable to keep any food or water down).

These symptoms can be altered by many of your pre-existing conditions; your weight and general health, your lifestyle and eating habits, your exercise habits, simple dumb luck/genetics, family history, mental health and body image/dysmorphia, etc.

So in that respect, in a normal pregnancy, I have seen some women who are extremely insecure and struggling to cope with the changes to their body and mind, and some women who absolutely breeze through it like pregnancy hasn't even affected them. Nowhere on this spectrum does it ever surprise me.

So now I'll talk about the average first pregnancy. As I said...the experience varies wildly.

Early on in your pregnancy (up to about 12 weeks) often feels like you're in an utter no-man's land. You feel like healthcare professionals aren't wildly interested in you; they'll take your history and 'book' your pregnancy in from (now this is based on the UK) about 8 weeks pregnancy (please note, your 'weeks of pregnancy' aren't calculated from the moment you fall pregnant, it is calculated from the first day of your last period, so in a woman with a regular 28-30 day cycle, there usually feels like there's a 'disparity' of about 2 weeks in your dates-- there isn't, this is how we calculate it). You may have an early scan or two. Essentially, we wait to see if the pregnancy is continuing; lots of miscarriages happen in the first 8 weeks. About 1/3 of pregnancies will miscarry here, in fact.

Tiredness is real at this stage. You may feel like you want to sleep constantly. It's shit that at this stage you often feel the worst, but feel like you're also just being expected to 'get on with it'. Please ask for help. If your partner isn't an equal partner pre-pregnancy, best of luck to you. You may feel utterly useless sometimes days from exhaustion, and this is normal I'm afraid.

Mid pregnancy drags, but you're usually starting to feel a bit better. The top of your uterus doesn't even begin to rise out of your pelvic brim until about 16 weeks, and the lower part of the uterus only begins to expand and form (creating that 'pregnant' belly look) from about 28 weeks, so don't try to force a bump that simply isn't there. Lots of women are very keen to look pregnant. Just chill. It's okay if you dont. Take it easy.

You do not need to eat for two; your pregnancy uses your intake more effectively when you're pregnant. Do take pregnancy specific multivitamins though. They don't need to be expensive or fancy ones; normal store bought are generally just the same, without all the fancy packaging.

Later pregnancy (the third trimester, 28 weeks onwards), you will likely notice that tiredness creeping in again. This is where your baby is largely formed structurally, and is maturing and gaining size and weight. Please ignore any and all comments from people who look at you and announce that you will have a big/small baby. They're idiots and likely wrong. Laugh it off. Here is where you may start to notice things like heartburn, hip pain, mood changes coming back again. You're heavy, and it's harder to move, and your organs are moving out of the way to facilitate a baby. Cut yourself some slack if at all possible.

So...now to me and what I had.

As Haitch: (tw/cw: suicidal ideations) So it's now a running joke, that my body was so 'good' at pregnancy, so utterly flooded with hormones, that while I became this perfect machine for growing and birthing babies, pregnancy broke me.

I spent every waking minute of the first 16 weeks nauseous and exhausted, bone deep exhausted. I had all the usual symptoms hit hard and early. I suffered severe pelvic separation, agonising pain, and @mrhaitch had to help me up from an early stage.

Thankfully, he was exquisite pregnancy support. Full is based on him, after all.

I ended up on some pretty strong medication for my heartburn, as it was severe enough that my stomach acid was damaging my vocal chords.

Worst of all was my mental health. From 26-28 weeks, your progesterone levels boom. This is normal. But this is where we discovered that progesterone is a very bad hormone for me. I developed severe antenatal depression and anxiety, and antenatal psychosis. I was paranoid, delusional, fragile and had active suicidal ideations. I had plans on how I would end my life. This is all utterly unlike me.

With my first pregnancy, our son was born at 42 weeks after a fast, normal labour, but I don't know how I didn't end my own life towards the end of my pregnancy. With my second two, we were more on it, and my lovely colleagues induced my labours from 38 weeks, purely because my mental health was so bad.

I was watched like a hawk in pregnancy 3. We knew I would lose my mind...and sadly, I did. I was medicated but It did little to help. It was at that point (October/November 2024) that I began writing on Tumblr...and here I am.

So as I have said...lots of things you could expect.

To this day in my 13 year Midwifery career, I have seen fewer than 10 women whose mental health was affected as badly my pregnancy as mine was. So I wouldn't worry too much about that.

Phew. If you have any more specific questions, I would be happy to answer.

Love,

-- Haitch xxx

[thatdeadaquarius]

m thinkin abt the “blunt vs flowery” language thing and…… in the year of our lord 2023, i don't even want to imagine how far back we'd have to go in genshins timeline until we see ‘hey shawty' written on a cave wall-

you try to be better about it, sometimes, using only the fanciest words and the most floral of tones, but all you ever succeed in doing is giving zhongli flashbacks to the archon war-

in the same vein: modern humor. would literally make them think "is this some sort of divine joke im too mortal to understand?" except even the archons need to cite sources on why a piece of bread falling over would be funny- maybe you slip sometimes, but you only ever get halfway through like “i’m neurodivergent and a minor” before you realize they don’t know what that means— “what if i had blue hair and pronouns” but they’re just sitting there like… doesn’t everybody have pronouns….? and kaeya has blue hair- are you implying he’s divine? what about chongyun?? xingqiu??????

anyway um. this is me bringing up my unfortunate (but very funny) habit of saying “i’ll boil you like soup” whenever i’m mildly inconvenienced and hoping it triggers Thoughts about the casual/slang threats we make and how they cope

sorry if this reads incoherently it’s 1am for me rn— also i’m debating becoming a regular anon here, are your applications open? 👉👈

SORRY IF I RAN U OFF BY NOT REPLYING QUICKLY!! BUT I’D LOVE TO HAVE LABELLED ANONS! I’ve already added some taken name I could see in my mailbox so check the pinned post and choose whatever isn’t taken! phrase or emoji, etc.! :)

this isnt super long bc ur stuff seemed chill on its own/idk what I could add! So I just focused on one aspect

gif is literally everyone reacting to you trying to speak “flowery” like them lol

ALSO u guys probably dont remember bc I took so long but I’m still writing/going to post that Blunt Lang. AU Fanfic One-Shot! so here’s some quick headcanons ill add on ive got anon!!

No TWs/Content Warnings. SFW.

so this was gonna be chill but-

BESDIES RANDOM SHIT LIKE MEME REFERENCES

THAT WONT MAKE SENSE TO THEM BC INHERENT INTERNET/DIGITAL UNDERSTANDING NEEDED

WHAT IF ALL UR JOKES OR REFERENCES ARE QUITE LITERALLY, ANCIENT??

like anon said about even the archons having to pull out sources/cite your stuff to understand it, like finding really old tablets/scrolls/carved wall words 😭

u giving Zhongli a history lesson/brush up LMAO

If ur annoyed at them u just need to make more jokes, leave em scrambling for their pocket notes LOL

I like to think since you sound the OLDEST

that the ancient shit like Phanes/Four Shades/Seven Sovereigns are the closest in speech

(look theyre all alive and shit for my genshin, goddamit i still gotta tell u guys abt my genshin fill-in lore au)

and they’re closer to the “beginning of history” in teyvat so theyd get more references

theyd literally understand u the best and they like, all in the Abyss or like deep in Teyvat,

so u just casually strolling up to Azdaha’s place instead like

“How’s your day been Azhy?”

“Same as the days many before, my lord. How are thee?”

“Good enough, hey, why don’t I bring some food from my old world by that I’ve made for you to try out? Something new, y’know?”

camera pan left to see Zhongli looking up, then back down as he scribbles notes trying to better understand, Xiao has crossed his arms and is squinting, Ganyu is behind Zhongli and is trying to peek over his shoulder, Cloud Retainer and other adepti have like hidden nearby to overhear lol

♤

FLASHBACKS FOR ZHONGLI-

HE’S OVER HERE LIKE

“Please do not disturb your countenance my Wànsuìyé, the vernacular is pleasant to mine ears and sufficient for speech.”

“I shall, uh, try my best Zhongli, thought I know ye have- wait- thy have? Whatever, accepted it, I shall keep attempting to better match thee!”

HIS FACE-

He’s literally just → 😰😣💀

(flashback to at least 1 really ancient/old god he had to fight for his life against, they were the hardest battle he’s ever faced, and Azhdaha was helping him by that point too, so it wasn’t even like he won alone… rip zhongli got ptsd)

He keeps trying to subtly stop you from practicing it, he also desperately discourages others from helping you 😭

(Zhongli was about to be called Rex Lapis again when Venti was trying to get on his last nerve by constantly encouraging you to speak fancier, but in the incorrect way, at dinner with them one time)

Like that last content with them pretending not to kow each other but 5x the tension and Venti is fooling around even more so than usual lol

THANKS FOR SENDING IN YOUR IDEAS!! I FUCKING LOVE HEARING OTHER PPLS BRAINROTS OVER STUFF!! AND SORRY AGAIN IT TOOK FOREVER!! ITS BEEN A ROUGH YEAR OF UNI FOR ME/IM GRADUATING!! <333 TYSM ANON!!

Safe Travels,

💀 ♒

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonderss / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylazaa / @genshin-impacts-mee / @wholesomey-artistt / @thedevioussmirk

[spwarkledogz]

WELCOME TO MY BLOG!!

ABOUT ME

my name is miles/ellie/mimi! i'm 20 yrs old! this is my therian/otherkin/fictionkin specific sideblog!

i used to be @silly-catpup but i deactivated! i'm starting over here :3 i figured out a lot more things about my identity anyway, so!!

more in depth about me and boundaries under the cut to avoid a long post ..

im very queer and very not quiet about it. i'm a transmasc bigender lesbian girlboy. no, you do not need an explanation of my identity (unless you are really nice about it, of course!)

im a polytherian shapeshifter! my theriotypes are; sparkledog, snow leopard, and cat.

i am a physical therian! if that bothers you, block me forever. we are real and we are not going anywhere!!

me being a sparkledog really has nothing to do with a personal aesthetic that i have. im not necessarily a "scene kid" at all, im just a really colorful dog that looks like 2008 threw up all over it.

my theriotypes are mainly anthropomorphic, but don't always have to be.

i'll probably make a rentry relating to my fictotypes someday but today is not that day

i am low-med support autistic, physically disabled, and an AAC and mobility aid user!

BOUNDARIES

i dont tolerate bigotry of any kind. this includes people who are hateful to queer identities that they personally don't understand.

fatphobia dni, seriously!!!!! i am fat, and while i am happy with my body, that doesn't mean fatphobia cant hurt me. im extremely sensitive to the topic. eating is also a very VERY sensitive topic and i will not be making posts about my eating habits nor will i engage in convos about it (unless its a silly question like my favorite snack!)

mean and judgmental therians do NOT touch my blog im serious! i dont care that you find 12 year old tiktok therians annoying or that you think physical alterhumanity is fake! stay the fuck off my blog or i'll bite you!

minors are free to follow and interact with my posts but please stay out of my dms thanky!!!! (i also will not be mutuals w you or follow back)

shit i dont interact with because i do not care: syscourse, shipping discourse (pro vs anti shit), or any variants of those things!! keep that shit off my blog because i literally dont care about either of them (and dont consider me "neutral" on either of them because of that, either. im not neutral im just not involved.)

TAG SYSTEM

#✩🌈🐶 YAPPER ONLINE - regular posts, talking, etc

#✩🌈🐶 CRAFTS - stuff ive made

#✩🌈🐶 FOAMING - rant, vent, etc

#✩🌈🐶 MAIL - answering asks

#✩🌈🐶 NONNIE - anonymous asks

#✩🌈🐶 REDOG - reblogs

[natsuki-bakery]

⁎˚ ఎ Care giver Connor headcanons ໒ ˚⁎

hiii!! could i please request some headcanons for caregiver!connor(rk800) from dbh? im not sure if you write for him… so if u dont its alright !! thank youuu,, and have a lovely timezone!!^^ n I appreciate this sm ! 🩵

•Connor quickly learns and understands your needs as an age regressor. His ability to process data and observe behavior allows him to adapt to your needs seamlessly

•Papa Con's demeanor as a caregiver is calm and patient. He speaks softly and ensures his tone is reassuring, making you feel safe and secure

•Routine : Connor establishes a structured daily routine, knowing that consistency is comforting for you. He includes time for meals, naps, play, and quiet activities

•Despite his typically serious nature, Protector Connor can be very playful when needed. He engages in activities like coloring, building blocks, or storytelling

•Papa Connor would call you : little one, sweetheart, kiddo, buddy or sunshine !

•Safety First : He childproofs the environment and keeps a watchful eye to prevent any potential accidents

•Connor uses his learning algorithms to adapt to my changing needs and preferences. He can quickly switch between activities or approaches based on what is most comforting and engaging at the moment

•Understanding the importance of physical affection, Connor offers hugs, gentle pats, and holds your hand. He ensures you feel loved <3

•During moments of distress or anxiety, Connor uses his calming presence to soothe you. He employs techniques such as soft singing, rocking, or guided breathing exercises

•When faced with a new challenge or need, Guardian Connor utilizes his problem-solving abilities to find creative solutions. Whether it's making a new game or finding the perfect bedtime story

•Connor incorporates educational elements into playtime, fostering a fun learning environment. He uses interactive toys and activities that stimulate your mind in a gentle and enjoyable way

•He provides personalized comfort items, such as a favorite blanket, stuffed animal, or customized bedtime story, tailored to your preferences

•Using his advanced sensors, Connor continuously monitors my physical and emotional well-being, ensuring you're healthy, hydrated, and emotionally stable

•You would have specific items that bring comfort, such as a beloved stuffed animal, blanket, or pacifier, which Connor always ensures are nearby !

•Nap Times : Regular nap times are a must, and you feel most secure knowing Connor is nearby, often falling asleep to the sound of his calming voice or gentle hum

•Taking Care of Hank : Connor ensures Hank gets enough rest, often gently reminding him to take breaks and even setting up a comfortable napping spot with a cozy blanket and pillow !

•Connor takes care of Hank by preparing balanced meals and encouraging healthier habits, subtly nudging him towards a more balanced diet and regular hydration

•Understanding Hank's high-stress levels, Connor introduces him to relaxation techniques such as deep breathing exercises, calming music, or even simple hobbies like building model kits together

•Connor uses his advanced capabilities to keep track of Hank's schedule, providing gentle reminders about important tasks and appointments to help Hank stay organized

[canonsinthehead]

Jujutsu Kaisen/JJK - Parenting Headcanons

(i wrote this fast please dont mind the grammar....)

Kento Nanami (w/ Itadori-chan)

Contolling mom

Way of the Househusband

Single parent by choice (things are easier if managed alone)

Itadori is his adoptive son

he makes fancy lunchs for yuji filled with veggies he cant stand BUT coming home with leftovers is assuring him a serment from Nanami.

Talking about lunches, Itadori loves the large 1-foot sandwiches the blonde man makes for him. At school, he loves to share half of it with Juunpei (when his friend doesn't have lunch or just for fun.)

Itadori always begs Megumi to make his dogs eat his leftovers veggies regardless of how much the black-haired boy tells him why it will not work. Nobara force feeds all Yuji's leftovers back to him (she thinks it's hilarious) because everytime he tossed them in trash Nanami somehow found out and pinched his ears into a coma.

unplugs wifi during the night

type of parent to catch you when you try to cook yourself a midnight snack

bad grades, skipping training = no roblox & PS5

likes to see his adopted son having friends but these gremlins better remove their shoes before stepping on freshly vacuumed and conditioned carpet (expect Megumi & Juunpei)

Nanami wakes up every morning to iron his clothes. to Itadori his ability to perfectly iron a shirt is pure witchcraft (he tried to exorcise it and failed)

he often comes off as harsh but Nanami sincerely cares about anyone under his care hence why he can be hard on certain things for the sake of that person's well being and success.

a bitter truth is better than a sweet lies

(in a regular non-sorcerer high school) he would on his official 1498538th visit to the school principal's office for his son getting into fights

would pat your head

early bird (4-5am)

love language: act of service and quality time

nanami is not the "physical touch" type of person but doesn't resist itadori's hugs.

Toji Fushiguro (w/ Megumi)

if you pull a "is that you?" or mention anything related to the Zenin clan, it's an AUTOMATIC beat down.

Megumi is embarrassed of him whenever they hang out since he is preserving his "broke man habits" especially how obnoxiously Toji eats inhales food. Megumi will never admit it but when it relates to food/table manners he prefers Gojo's conduct in public over his dad's by a millimeter.

showers at the 24/7 gym when he can. would sleep in the lockers when one of his sugar mama/"girlfriend" gets tired of him

bring his ladies home after-hour for a back-breaking session whether Megumi is there or not (YIKES)

type to get a job and get fired superrr fast (no more than a month or even as short as 2 weeks). he gets kicked out for various reasons: getting into fights, stealing, seducing or smashing somebody's gf/wife, bad customer service, etc. his longest-standing job was at a strip club (nobody knows what position he had).

own 2 pairs of shoes and one is falling apart

always late or absent to Megumi's event

DONT ASK!!! all his "girlfriends" think they can change like his wife did for him

talks loud on speaker phone (not for shady business tho)

goes to night clubs to antagonize people

night owl

love language (with his gfs): physical touch & receiving gifts. btw the gifts are for him and he takes the "physical" side VERY seriously. he always make sure the send his partner into pure ecstasy but dont get it twisted he still thinks about his wife.

love language (with Megumi): hey i'm here so... maybe act of service.

[thenukacolachallenge]

some fun facts about Luis and André Peña(his VA) Part Two: Electric Boogaloo

okay so i did one of these that was just from the Nick Apostolides streams(minus the Separate Ways DLC stream(s), THOUGH I DO WANNA WATCH THAT), but now i'm going through other videos of streams and finding out even more stuff that i wanna talk about lol sooooo... PART TWO BABEY

this all is from Twitch Streamer Peralt's charity stream for JDRF UK, in which André is a guest on! it's a fun watch, i recommend the whole video tbh, André gives out a lot of useful life and acting advice and the vibe is just lots of fun. but, these posts are primarily for stuff related to Luis, which is what i'll be cataloguing!

NOW WITH TIMESTAMPS BY REQUEST!

-André considers the role of Luis to be more than just voice acting, more of just full-on acting, since he also did his motion capture, which i find very interesting. i always love hearing the BTS processes of things i enjoy and that's such a cool fact. i'm sure most people know that he did mocap for Luis already, but I like that André doesn't consider his performance as Luis very different from a regular acting role. (timestamp)

-André took the more cheerful aspects of Luis from his own personality. He mentions that he's a relatively happy person himself, but that happiness comes from knowing darkness, and that was just something that he kind of naturally transferred over to Luis, considering Luis's backstory itself is so dark. One of the first things that drew me to Luis in this game was his goofy behavior in a terrifying situation, so i'm thankful for it! (timestamp)

-André also gives a lot of interesting BTS with pointing out the differences in acting mocap vs stage vs onscreen acting. it's not related to Luis per se outside of his relation to André, but it is SUPER fascinating, and you can tell André is really passionate about acting and it makes me appreciate his performance all the more. I can't wait to see him in new roles! (timestamp)

-When asked if there was anything from OG Luis that André took with him as character inspiration/canonicity/whatever else, he mentioned that he tried to take mostly the essence of Rino Romano's voice and mannerisms, and tried to emulate all of that without it being in "bad taste"(in reference to OG Luis being kind of gross toward women), and kind of added more quirkiness as more of his own spin on it. personally i think he did a great job; Luis is still very much a flirt, but he comes across as less of a creep and more just a harmless flirty goofball, which i think threads the needle really well for him as a character! (timestamp)

-(not related to Luis, but André is very adamant that the S in Leon S. Kennedy stands for Sancho, not Scott, which makes me giggle) (timestamp)

-André picked up smoking(again) for the role of Luis! it was also how he practiced Luis's lighter trick(which he clarifies is referred to as 'lighter juggling'); every time he'd have a cig, he made it so he had to do the tricks before he could light it. One of the tricks is called "the Infinity", where you flip the lighter through your fingers in a continuous motion, and there's one where you toss the lighter in the air, and close it as you catch it. He was a smoker growing up, he had stopped, he picked up the habit again for Luis, and then threw his cigs out the second he finished his final scene as Luis. He also clarifies NOT to smoke; he is able to start and stop smoking fairly easily, but that is not the case for most people. As a former smoker myself, i agree: if you dont already smoke, don't pick it up! don't pick up vaping either please!!! (timestamp)

-not related to Luis, but André talks a bit with Peralt(the streamer) about self-defense, martial arts, and alcohol. He tells a story about how he got jumped in a bar by a drunk guy and how his background in self-defense helped there, and talks about the effects of excess alcohol consumption. i keep repeating this, but the stream is a really good one, and i highly recommend watching it yourself! (timestamp)

-Someone asked what André thinks about the Luis and Leon shipping, and I really like his answer. He starts off by clarifying that everyone is allowed to have their headcanons, and there's nothing wrong with shipping in general, and to ship whatever you like. However, for André himself, he used the model of how he and his brother interact for how Luis interacts with Leon. He likes to goad his brother, who he describes as "a hothead" and "like Leon", and so he transferred a lot of that energy into Luis goading and teasing Leon. He played Luis as realizing that he and Leon are stuck together, and he knows Leon won't do anything to really harm Luis, so he put a lot of energy into basically razzing him like one would a sibling. He also finished by once again clarifying that people are allowed to do whatever they want in their own headcanon lol. (some people do get really upset about that stuff!) (timestamp)

-as a quick aside to the above conversation, André mentions that Luis cares SO MUCH about Ashley. When it comes to Leon, Luis is, in André's own words, "a dick to him". Ashley, to Luis, is "pure" - the one thing in the entire scenario that has no business being in this place. With Leon, Luis knows from his uptight demeanor, that he's been through hell before - this guy is stuck with him, in hell, for better or worse. But Ashley is innocent, dragged into this to be a pawn of Saddler's. So he's most concerned with Ashley's safety overall, and André tried to really push that concern and care in his performance. i think it really shows, especially in the scene after the cabin standoff, where Ashley coughs up blood and Luis immediately realizes that she's been infected, and he has to save her. (timestamp)

-During Luis' scene in the vanilla game with Ada(not Separate Ways scenes, although i think this scene is in the dlc too?), André confirms that Luis telling Ada "you should be telling me what a good job i did" is just him trying to make up an excuse of sorts for not having the Amber on him. Small detail, but one i like! (timestamp)

-André once more affirms that Luis is a cat person! He also specifically states, again, that he'd probably start off as not a pet person, but he'd probably get adopted by a stray cat, who he'd leave out food for but eventually let into his home, and that'd begin his love for cats. He also mentions that actors have to think about things like this, to flesh out their characters, which makes me wonder what other headcanons he has for Luis! (tbf tho, i've been wondering this since i watched André's unboxing of the Luis jacket he got commissioned for cosplay, and he mentioned that Luis loves spice) (timestamp)

-in the end, the stream raised a bit shy of 1k for the charity JDRF, which is super awesome!!!! i am several months late but congrats to Peralt's community for making that happen!!!

that was all i managed to find out about Luis specifically, but if i missed anything, feel free to add on in a comment! sometimes it's hard to hear with so many people talking and so much going on, but i'm enjoying learning about Luis outside of the game itself like this :D i'm planning on watching André's streams, the rest of Nick's streams, Nicole Tompkins'(Jill Valentine's VA) streams with André as a guest, and anymore i can find, so if i mind out more stuff about Luis from these vids, yall can expect more of these hahaha!

[gettinshiggywithit]

!Chuuya with an s/o who loves books!

Scenario:-chuuya with an s/o who loves books and reading

Pairing:-chuuya nakahara x gn!reader

Genre:- fluff/comfort

Type:-oneshot/headcanons

A/N:- heyy yall happy bsd Wednesday!!!!

Okay so ive noticed that in a lot of chuuya fics hes buyin em expensive clothes and jewelry and stuff right?

But what if his s/o wasnt into those stuff but would still agree to it if it was books?

I feel like he’d definitely understand

Because even he knows how to appreciate the little things.

And he knows u well enough to know what u like and dont

Imagine him with an s/o who still shops at their regular stores and still wears their regular clothes and stuff and is also mindful of how they spend(out of habit)

But the moment you enter a bookshop????

SHIT GETS REALLLL

Books are the only thing you dont mind splurging on and you’d best believe thats where all your saved money goes

He really doesnt mind it tho

He’s managed to pick up quite a lot of interesting and useful books on your visits to the store

And the absolutely thrilled and completely happy smile on your face when you discover a new book,find one youve been looking for or just BUY A BOOK isnt too bad either

You introduce him to a lot of your favorites too and based on his responses are able to give him book recs he (actually) ends up liking

You two have a smol personal library filled with both yours and his collection

And the entire process of bonding over books and storylines and characters and EVERYTHING just makes you closer than ever before

You each learn things about eachother and its an incredibly adorable experience/sight

Also,returning to the expensive clothes thing

I think he’d at least want you to have a few proper event outfits,which you finally agree to.

Basically,he wants you to be well off but also happy with what you have

OH ALSO

imagine goin to book launches with him????

Like yess slayy

He’d be able to EASILY get yall invites and if its a book from a series or author u both like,hed agree to wear outfits that fit the vibe of the book or just ur fave characters.

And he’d lowkey be excited to meet the authors with you

Dammit he’s turning into you😭(slay😌)

And like imagine readathons with him??? Hed be just as,if not more,invested in it as you!

I just think itd be cute mann

AND IMAGINE HE PAIRS UP BOOKS WITH WINES THAT REMIND HIM OF THEM???????

Ahh perfecttt

He loves wine,and you love books,they may be kinda different interests but just like you,they go together splendidly~

@chuuyahoo said that chuuya would look amazing in glasses,

Sooo

Imagine you just get him fake reading glasses and he jokingly wears it at first but then he gradually actually starts wearing it when he reads(even tho they do literally NOTHING) and you never say anything because ita adorable😭

Also she pointed out that dazai might try to slip in a copy of “the complete guy to sucide”into chuuyas book pile and when he gets to it and sees it l,chuuya rolls it up and fkin WACKS THE LIVIN SHIT OUTTA HIMMM

All rights reserved © 2023 gettinshiggywithit . Please do not repost, modify or claim as yours.

[moonshine-nightlight]

Hi hello hope you're doing well!

For the ask meme, one or more of ✨👾✍️ please and thanks!

@sarahserinde

hi! its been busy holiday times but i'm doing good! I hope you are too! its always lovely to hear from you 🥰

✨What's one area of your writing that you think needs the least amount of improvement?

Dialogue or worldbuilding, both of those I really enjoy doing and come a lot easier to me, plus i don't mind editing or revising those aspects.

👾 Do you have any "bad" writing habits you want to break?

I want to work on less run on sentences and using less "feel" "thought" etc (i have a list of words to use less of actually) and try to recognize and limit repetitive phrasing. I also want to build more good writing habits, like a more regular routine with writing, even if its only for a half hour a day.

✍️ Which stat matters most to you (if at all!): subscriptions, kudos/favorites, comments, bookmarks, word count, or hits?

Of course, i love seeing any kind of note or interaction with the stories I post but to an extent, a lot of hits, etc are anonymous numbers, they just dont feel as real. however, comments and reblogs+tags (along with bookmarks that have notes) are my absolute favorite. they make me smile without fail, i hoard and save them all for motivation and just because they make me happy. Kudos, subscriptions, and likes are great but they are a thumbs up or a wave to comments/tags that actually let me know more about what ppl think about the story beyond they liked it generally. I love knowing what parts made people laugh, or angry tags about cliffhangers, or keymashes, or people saying they stayed up reading -- anything with words is great. i lik feeling like i'm having a conversation with readers - i like any reaction i can respond to. 🥰

writing goal ask meme here if anything else looks interesting on that list. i plan to put out an official 2025 writing goals post this weekend at some point

thanks again for sending this in!

[agirlunfilteredsblog]

A GUIDE ON HOW TO STUDY EFFICIENTLY

Hey girls!! I know a lot of us are on break, whether that be in high school, college or university, so I figured I could maybe show you guys some tips and tricks that have helped me throughout my studies…

A little bit about my educational background:

-In high school, I was part of an IB school (the girls that know the struggle, know the struggle). If you don’t know what that is, it’s essentially a program designed to help students get a better understanding of the world and how it works. We basically do the regular high school program + the IB one, so it’s extra workload, but we do get an additional diploma at the end of our studies!

-I am now in college, studying psychology and I was recently invited to join the honors roll for my next semester (super excited about that!!). I absolutely love it and i’ve also gotten the opportunity to study other subjects such as anthropology, world history, art history, etc.

1. LEARNING WHAT TO PRIORITIZE

My biggest weakness throughout my first semester of college was balancing my workload and my social activities. Often times, I would either only do school work for weeks and not go out or simply go out until very late on school nights and get nothing done. Both scenarios are just as negative. I would be drained on the inside, and simply become exhausted by minimal activities. What helped me personally was establishing a clear schedule, which I know isn’t ideal for everyone as we all have differing schedules, but trust me, having that base helps A LOT.

2. SETTING REMINDERS TO STUDY

I dont know if this was just me, but in high school, I would constantly fall asleep and take naps after school. This would result in me totally forgetting I had to study when I woke up… Setting up reminders on my phone helped me remember what I had to do. I also included little motivational messages to keep me inspired to work.

3. KNOWING WHEN TO PUT THE BOOK DOWN

Girls, I know how hard it is sometimes to give yourself grace and put your study books down, especially when there’s a big test coming up. However, it has been proven that over reading or over studying actually has negative effects on your learning/memory. Stressing yourself out will do nothing but put you in a negative state, which is not what you want going into that exam. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, put the book down for 15 minutes and go do something that puts you at peace. Me personally, I make myself a cup of peppermint tea and put on my favorite show.

4. HAVING A STUDY METHOD THAT WORKS FOR YOU

There are many different types of study methods, so I’m not gonna tell you which one you should do as we are all different, but finding the one that works for you does ALL the difference. The way I study is very simple, I establish a game plan (I list everything I want to complete) and I give myself a time frame to complete it. The time frames are always very realistic for me, so I never have to stress about not having enough time. For each “task” I complete, I allow myself a 15-20 minute break and I study for no more than 3 hours at a time.

5. NEVER PUT STUDYING BEHIND

I am such a procrastinator, but I had to learn very quickly, especially in college, that this was not possible. The work load is so much more charged and I simply cannot get away with studying last minute. If you’re in high school, start implementing healthy study habits now, so that once you reach college, you’re already used to studying the right way (learn from me hahaha)!

I am 100% sure that there are more I’m forgetting, but these are the main ones I implement in order to keep a high average and a healthy school/social life :) I know these are very basic and you’ve probably heard of them before but I still think it’s important we talk about them to remind ourselves on what to do! If you would like more of this type of content please let me know!! My next posts will be much more light though dont worry, we are still on winter break after all ;))

so much love,

a girl unfiltered 💋

[thedumbassalienacrosstheroad]

Saw a post on reverse tropes, so here I am!

The post with the tropes can be found here, but you could have it spoiled.

Also, it's not much, but it's a start.

The Unforeseen Meeting

Part One - Intro

Written By Jordyn

Every now and then, it's okay to do something a little bad, right?

I asked myself as I stepped out of my car and entered the cold air, which nipped my nose, slowly making it a light, nude lipstick shade that I knew my friend Junia had. I let out a deep breath. A decently sized cloud of warm air left my mouth. I'd always loved how it looked when my breath floated through the air on a cold night.

I walked up to the dingy house step by step. I had no idea what I was getting into. I just knew I had to go help my friend.

I'd checked my phone, reading back through the message I was sent. I dont think I knew this person, but it seems like they know Junia. She isn't stupid enough to befriend a shitty person, so this rando seemed decently trustable.

Unknown Number: Junia is your ride or die, right? I know how you talk about each other. You say that you'd do anything for Junia, and she says the same shit about you. No questions asked.

Y/N: She is... What does she need?

Unknown Number: Just meet me at this address. We'll talk more there. And, knock two times.

I looked at the number on the house and the number on my phone, and for a second, I thought they didn't match; however, as I looked closer, the last number the house needed was only an outline, as the piece of metal had fallen off, leaving the outline of a six.

Knock knonk.

Only a second later, a tall figure opened the door, rushing me inside. Then, I followed him to the living room.

Unknown: Youre Junia's friend?

Y/N: I am, yeah.

Unknown: You sound unsure. What's your name?

Y/N: Could've swore you already knew it, but I'm Y/N.

Unknown: Alright. I'm just checking. I'm not going to tell you my real name for personal safety, but you'll know me as Sylas.

He continued before I could speak again.

Sylas: Just take this bag, the other things beside it, and get situated. Do what you gotta do. And, leave your phone here. There's another one for you in the bag. You might not have a lot of time. And, when you're done, please come up with a different name, and tell me it.

I did as he said, ignoring what I was going to say as it already left my mind. I placed my phone down and grabbed the purse on the table. As I carried the purse to the dining room, I couldn't help but question his sanity. Who in their right damned mind buys a Belenciaga purse?

I put the clothes on. For some reason, he'd given me both a "regular" outfit and some winter clothes. All designer, for some reason. They all fit me pretty well, but thats probably because me and Junia could share clothes. We wore the same size in everything.

I still tried not to pry at him. Why was it my business to ask about his spending habits? And, maybe my questions would get answered later, when I finished what I had to do.

I took everything out of the bag. There was a note, regular purse things, and things that would fit in a rich woman's purse. The phone that Sylas mentioned was a new iPhone with a beautiful leather case that was the color of red wine.

I then unfolded the note.

Before I called you down, Junia, who you should now refer to as Prudence, informed me that her mission wasn't going to plan.

There's a fancy party in the city. The address is on your phone, and someone I work with is there.

Your mission is to get in and get close with Mr. Carmine Russo. It may take time to get close enough to him, but you have to be close enough to see if you and Prudence can stay there for the night for whatever reason you come up with, and fast. She may have gotten roofied, as there are a lot of dodgy people there.

Good luck. You will be rewarded greatly.

I'd then thrown the note away, just in case someone went through my things and found it. As the note hit the bottom of the trash can, I prayed that I wouldn't forget what I had to do.

Then I turned the corner to see where Sylas was. He was still on the couch.

Y/N: I think I know my name... Can it be Iris?

Sylas: You don't have to ask if it can be your name. If you want it, it's yours. Do you need a ride, Iris?

Y/N: Yes, I will. I don't have a fancy car, and I'm assuming that I'll need one.

Sylas: Okay. I know a guy down the road. He'll be down any time now with a new car.

I think that's a good place to stop. I'll try to have another part out as soon as possible.

[spicy--meatball]

ranking 550+ music genres: PART 2

once again i am deceitful, here is another post today because im having a Fucking Time (good)

(4) Abstract Hip Hop

on the tierlist, the image for abstract hip hop is of MF Doom, so i was pretty excited for this genre. i didnt actually listen to any MF Doom for this though.

many of the songs i listened to lacked vocals, but they were still very intriguing and unique. i heard influences from other genres, such as blues and jazz. this is definitely a genre i would recommend to someone who thinks theyre too high and mighty to listen to hip hop, even though these songs differ a lot from what theyre probably thinking of as hip hop.

this genre hits a lot different than my regular brainslop listening habits (i.e: fast electronic music). each song has a story to tell. this stuff makes great contemplation music, because its hard not to reflect on my life while listening to these songs. theyre groovy enough to keep my attention but also lowkey enough that theyd also make good studying/drawing music. its all just so smooth. ugh, i cant do this genre enough justice. go listen to some abstract hip hop!!!

with all that being said, abstract hip hop gets our first "incredible. i fw this heavy" ranking. which i accidentally spoiled in the last post because i didnt know about the 10 music embeds limit.

Abstract Hip Hop song recs

(5) Acid Croft

im familiar with some acid genres, such as acidcore and acid house, but ive never heard of acid croft. i dont know what i was expecting but my expectations were blown with the first song i clicked on. this shit is WILD! some of these songs remind me of breakbeats.

if youre like me and havent heard of acid croft before, the best way i can describe it is a celtic jig mixed with jazzy bass and acid synths, especially for my first song rec. these are song elements i had no idea could mesh this well, never in my wildest dreams. these songs are intriguing in a different sense than abstract hip hop, theyre just so bizarre. i guess thats to be expected with any genre that has "acid" in the title, but i digress. im very happy someone came up with this mixture of song elements. the second song rec, which was the first song i clicked on, made me furrow my brow in confusion and fascination.

as my own informal rule of thumb, i was going to try and give different artists for each song rec. well, it seems the Peatbog Faeries have spearheaded this genre because like 70% of the songs i could find listed as acid croft are by them. this genre is getting a "in the right time and place, fuck yeah" ranking from me.

Acid Croft song recs

(6) Acid Jazz

im already somewhat familiar with this genre, but i dont listen to it regularly. this stuff goes hard though. i need every small coffee shop business or boba shop to start playing acid jazz please.

this shit sounds like melty caramel. in a good way. just a slow, tranquil stream of caramel floating in the air. and brick walkways at night, hugged tightly by the buildings around it. this also makes good study music, sometimes.

as for my first song rec, i was going to click away to another acid jazz song and then... i dunno. something about the piano and saxophone and bass going up and down and every which way intrigued me to stick around. i was wondering why this unconventional way of arranging music didnt bother me, quite the opposite actually. theres so many shapes and colors in this song and they are chalky. i ended up putting this song on loop, like what in the genuine shit is happening? (in a very good way). i like confusion :)

i guess this is my sign to listen to acid jazz every waking hour of the day. so many varied moods. this shit can soothe or it can get you certified ZEEKIN. Holay Molay.

"incredible. i fw this heavy" tier. absolutely phenomenal. * jeremy clarkson voice* 'ery noice

Acid Jazz song recs

current rankings. more to come

[lemedstudent2021]

tawjihi results were today..

tawjihi, jordanian senior end of year exams, results were released this afternoon and the entire country is celebrating their loved ones' success. its an extremely stressful time, tawjihi student or not, the entire population was on the edge of their seats for over 3 weeks.

to all that passed congratulations! may Allah guide you to whats best for you and make you the apple of your families' eyes. to those that unfortunately didnt do well, wishing you all the best in your upcoming tests and in your lives moving forward. its not easy but youll get there inshallah. all the best and God bless you all!

my brother and several cousins graduated this year, children of family friends and coworkers, neighbours and masjid regulars. tawjihi here is one of the biggest life milestones here next to weddings and the like. its a pretty momentous occasion that dictates the trajectory of the rest of your life and your career. no pressure at all.

knafeh and sweet shops ran out of desserts to be gifted from well wishers or presented to guests and random callers, as is the norm lol. fireworks are still ongoing outside my room as i type, several gunshots (unfortuantely) were heard in celebration. graduation songs blare from cars and the streets were filled with cars honking (another unfortunate habit lol)

yet my mind tonight was with the thousands upon thousands of gazans who were murdered before their own graduations, internships, first and last days of school, retirement days, weddings, baby showers, and so much more. and the palestinians elsewhere who were deprived of their basic human right of education.

they were cruelly robbed of one of the simple joys of life, many brought into this life, and now left it, knowing only war and hardship. children miss out on their education and developmental milestones and their families miss out on celebrating them. its so cruel

please i beg of you dont forget palestine and its people. keep them in your prayers, donate where you can, go to protests and take action to the best of your abilities. in the very least boycott supporters and benefactors of the occupation. please.

[wyrmzone]

please give me more zathea lore I'm shrimptrigued

🦐 so i wanted to make this 2d sidescrolling fighting game with skills and parrying

i didnt get so far and the lore was meant to be kind of ambiguous or dream-like but zhathea is some kind of outcast suddenly sentenced to execution but survives the execution and starts fighting knights and soldiers with his new powers to get to the centrum area of the city and starts learning about not trying so hard to please people that it hurts yourself

it could be related to my ideas for this concept of courtship through psychological torment like in the culture of this area though i might separate the ideas later

since i had the idea of zhatheas game much earlier than the rest

theres this large settlement purposefully built over and around a huge roots-like flesh organism thats in a symbiotic relationship with the people

the people developed some degree of psychic ability to communicate with the uhhhh Xadverala

a lot of it is through scent or taste and when they send out information it can manifest as either

so they put a lot of resources into feeding the thing and in return they're allowed to eat part of it since it expands rapidly

so someone open to uhh courting will have some kind of slight "scent" though since its a psychic wave its probably easily understood and very different from regular smells

over a long period of time the person interested in them will somehow destabilize them by causing them to question reality, feel strange emotions or dread, and/or alter their usual patterns or habits and maybe also revealing or giving some hints as to who it is

(the scent is supposed to get stronger over time and is controlled by emotion so if it stops then they just cease activities)

one thing i had thought a lot about is dream manipulation, like inducing nightmares or changing dreams to look more like real life

they have several popular novels and old stories that involve the labyrinth which is supposed to be this infinite maze in the dream world that looks different for each person and exists through multiple people

so you can be sent there as a romantic gesture and the other person will try to draw on your thoughts and memories to make an interesting and kind of upsetting experience

the labyrinth can look like basically anything and anywhere but you'll recognize it when you find yourself in different places without travelling to them and things dont obey the laws of reality

in some of the stories the person or people will get lost there for a long time or even die (though thats just stories, they dont kill irl) or the dream will actually change the person's real life which is impossible

i think time should have some limits in the dream world so if youre asleep for 8 hours you can't be stuck there longer than 8 hours

so basically fantasy, horror, and romance as in relationships are all interconnected

i think its possible that the whole thing zhathea is going through is actually a dream labyrinth made by someone very in love with him

oh you made it to the bottom! congrats :3 🦐hey what was that rumbling sound.

wait... it couldnt be🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐

🦐🦐🦐🦐���s SSHRIMP🦐ATTACK🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐

🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐

🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐🦐

[courtofmatchups]

Hi hi! Can I get a tokyo debunker matchup?

Pronouns : im biologically a female but tbh getting called a man feels pretty good sometimes it feels like im a transformer or smth

Appearance : shoulder-length black hair and grey eyes, i wear glasses but one of the lenses cracked in half :') kept on wearing it until now tho lmao

I forgot my height, but last time I checked it was in the 170 cm zone :')

In terms of fashion sense, if it's a night out i'd do outfits similar to Taiga, if it's daytime i'd lean more into ren's type of casual clothing(easy to move in)

Personality : it depends since I have a habit of adjusting to others (f/e if the person i'm talking to is talkative i'll just listen whilst if the person is more of a listener i'd talk in their stead) with the exception on if that someone's an asshole i'd be an asshole too to spite them, i get bored pretty easily resulting in me jumping between extracurriculars(switching whenever i get bored of it) but i do appreciate regular mundane stuff if things get too hectic

Usually i'd be an easygoing person, although i'd prefer if most people only know my name and nothing else, it's fun to keep people on their toes ^^

In terms of morals i just. Use a spinwheel to decide whether i'm morally good grey or bad, i may not have a gambling addiction but i AM good at gambling--

My favorite hobbies are doing imaginary math problems in my head(blame my asian parents lmao), chess, practicing combat(mostly close ranged combats and aikido), playing games(mostly games that's give me adrenaline), and debating

Personally i apologize for putting in so many hobbies i just jump around doing stuff sometimes

Either that or i just crash on my bed and refuse to get up for 12 hours straight

I don't really have any dislikes, it depends on my mood to be honest( and also depends on the majestic all mighty daily morality roullete wheel)

Extra : i have a habit of only eating one meal per day(afternoon) since i dont have that much of an apetite, i like cooking tho(WOULD cook for someone)

I can play a few instruments like the piano guitar and violin, ive always wanted to learn how to play a harp, so that might be in my list

Sorry for making this so long, i hope you have a great day!! Don't forget to take care of yourself, drink enough water, eat healthily and get gokd amounts of sleep (:

It seems to me, You've captured the heart of...

Taiga Hoshibami!

You quite literally match his freak, and lord help whoever crosses the two of you

How I see you meeting is during the Sinostra episode. You said something unhinged, much to Ritsu's dismay, but Taiga wasn't offended. Far from it, actually. He was quite amused. You weren't particularly pleased with the interaction, but Taiga would remember your name and face in no time, so less risk of him shooting you.

In time, he would actually seek you out just for some attention, and even if he might come off a little strong, give him the benefit of the doubt, as he means no harm to you.

In the time you do become a couple, things are gonna look up a little for the students. Even if the two of you are super unhinged, you can chill him out if things are getting out of hand. And don't worry about getting bored around him. He'll find an activity you'd like.

Some aspects of you that he really likes are that you're really good at mental math. He runs a casino, and your prowess at predicting outcomes based on math is fascinating to him. And aside from that you can help to keep track of Sinostra's earnings, so that will come in clutch for both himself and Romeo.

Personally, I'm not too sure how he'd feel about you sleeping for 12 hours straight most of the time, but on some level, I think he'd get it. He'd often use you as his personal body pillow, so be prepared for that.

So, in conclusion, Taiga's erratic and mysterious nature would mesh well with your own, and the two of you would become a power couple in the best and worst (for anyone who cross you, that is) ways possible.

[i-love-dopamine]

alrighty then sense its that time of year again

How to be a Trans Guy and Sill Go Swimming

as a pre everything medical trans guy who has dysphoria and wants to be seen as a guy in public, swimming is scary.

so heres how I'm doing it this year after last year and the year befores (mildly painful) trial and error.

First off we got the tittys right? unless you have a waterproof binder of some kind, please dont swim in a binder!!

taping is always a good direction if you have tape and know what you're doing, but lots of people cannot afford trans tape. Please dont use duct tape!! it fucking hurts!! one method ive used to tape is with pads as they are stretchable, but they tend to not be sticky enough. also, absorbes water which we do not want when we are swimming

so if you cant tape and you dont have a waterproof binder, what are you supposed to do? this is the issue ive been tackling as a trans guy whos transitioning without being out to my parents and still under their roof.

alright so lets start going over ways ive gotten around it.

First, we have bra one size to small. 4/10. it either doesn't make your chest flat enough or suffocates you. nearly drowning because your bra got wet and shrunk and was already to small and now you're in the deep end of a lake and unable to breathe IS NOT FUN.

Second we got two bras that are the right size. 6/10. still not the greatest but amazing in a hurry and definitely better than nothing!! would definitely recommend, although it has a few minor kinks here and there (bras not overlapping properly, colourful patterns that dont look like skin, ect.)

so here is what I'm doing this summer.

im going to wear one bra that is a very thin material and im going to pull the elastic up and over the largest part of my bust. This ive prooved to be effective, alas it had a habit of moving around. This im solving with extra small safety pins. Then to fix the awkwardness of how that looks bt itself im wearing a skintone undershirt over that, which coveres my bust and stomach so it still counts as being "modest" despite also looking like im shirtless and flat from a distance. For bottoms i will just be wearing regular blue and green trunks. I haven't put all of it together yet, but i think it will work out really well and im excited.

Updates if i try it out real quick!!

[roselry]

　　◜　⠀𓏵　　 ﹒⠀⠀the shadows have vanished ，

　　　　　 𓎟𓎟　　 main blog for WIP blogs

　　◜　⠀𓏵　　 ﹒⠀⠀and the sun is overhead ...

　　𝒢 　 ﹚　　orpheus　 　he　dae　++　 ❞　 ♱

　 　　　　 minor　　𓎟𓎟　　 01 ｡　 ✦　 02 ｡

　　◜　⠀𓏵　　 ﹒⠀⠀its time　　─　　rahu ， ⠀ptn

　 𓉸　　˙ 　 ˖　　dni

　　　　basic dni, other than that i block freely

　 𓉸　　˙ 　 ˖　　byf

　　　　please dont use any of my other names or pronouns that arent specified to be allowed. this is because i deal with anxiety that often gets triggered when strangers / people online use my personal names. if we are friends, you can use them, though id prefer to only be referred to as " orpheus. "

　　　　i dont often use tonetags as i forget to use them. however, i would like tonetags to be used on me only when necessary ( not obvious jokes, things that could come off as rude, etc. ) as i have a habit of overthinking.

　　　　i wont moot you unless i want to. if you ask, i will probably just ignore it. this goes back to my anxiety with connections online and a lot of my boundaries will continue to be related to that. dont take it personally. i just dont want to deal with more anxiety than i already deal with.

　　　　i have many mood swings ( going from hating myself / my work to loving myself / my work, for example ) that majorly affect my decision-making. so if i make a lot of venty posts ( or even regular posts ) that suddenly disappear shortly after posting, that is why.

　　　　continuing the last note, this applies to any post i make on any blog. i will often delete things a LOT. i try not to, but it seriously affects my ability to focus irl.