#people calling him old monster will never not be funny to me

[morweneledhwen]

Wu Xie:

Who lives in those houses on the mountain?

Zhang Haike:

The old monsters.

Zhang Rishan somewhere, probably:

*sneezes*

[fortunemars]

Alright council i have SO MANY THOUGHTS but I started typing them in the tags before I realised how many I had... Good time to learn there's a tag cap... Anyway I'd love to world build on this a lot more bc this is interesting!!! This is so long that I have to page break it 😭😭 why am I like this

Okay tw under the page break: death, grief, a tiny bit of implied gore

So many things to explore with the different SKs and their reactions to discovering it, to the actual event of shad dying, to the aftermath where they'd be forced to give up their power and their immortality to end the pain of basically being suspended in the time between living and dying or deciding to keep the power as it slowly dwindles and destroys their bodies bit by bit. Torn to shreds because they were so full of greed. Living through every ounce of pain that came until it finally ended. A warrior to the end, no?

I'd love to see if I could write smthn with this concept. I'm thinking of all the options I'd have. Like how does laur find out? Through vylad (a comrade), before the fight? Or Gene in the middle of the battle, a shock that gives gene enough time to knock laurance down and remind him of everything he's gone through to get here, how much he's lost and how much hes had to give up for the ones he loves, how much he's been pushed to the side for the village's gain?

Would Laurance reconsider, turn on aph or Garroth? Would be hesitate to kill them, let gene do it instead and tell laurance it was his fault they died so brutally, that laurance could have done it himself if he wasn't so afraid? Or would he double down, get stronger, fight harder, and win? Why, because he thinks he's okay with dying for them? Or does he think it's the only way he can save them from every bad thing that laurance represents? Does he defeat Shad because he thinks it is the only way his soul could be redeemed by Irene, to be the end of her lost lover's reign of terror, to end the existence of these demonic bodies that were corrupted and twisted from their original forms?

Furthermore, how would aphmau and Garroth react? Would they find him before he fully died or would they find him after, slowly decaying with a peaceful smile stuck in his face? How would they tell the others, the village, the alliance? What would they say of him when he was gone, how would they celebrate him, how would they remember him? Would he be forgotten in the history books, another faceless admirer of the new Irene?

Some random other questions: would Laurance meet ungrith in some sort of limbo or would ungrith already be born again? Or would laurance's soul be devoured by the fates as a payment because of how long he kept it after he died? Maybe he becomes a ghost like Malachi, doomed to walk within the borders of Phoenix Drop unseen and unheard for years, decades, forever...

Would aphmau and Garroth grieve together or would they end up blaming each other, or themselves, for laurance's choice and for not knowing until it was too late? Would they ever know if he suffered as he died again? how long he was there dying, if it was cold and quiet in their absence or if the burning of the nether and screaming of the souls be the last thing he heard-- a demented lullaby to sooth his aching soul to rest...

Ahem as you can tell I think a lot about laurance... Please tell me any of this made sense...

Ps I literally can't fandom tag this other than aphmau and aphmau Minecraft diaries bc of HOW MANY THOUGHTS I HAD HELPPPPPP THERES STILL MORE BUT MY PHONE IS LAGGING SO HARD

This post is relating to the thoughts that @laurencezvahlslefteyebrow, @xerith-42 and I have been discussing. Somehow the brain rot has progressed to me completely losing my shit.

okayokayokay

We were talking about what would happen to Shadow Knights if Shad were defeated and he died. And I have sososo many thoughts.

But this ones a bit hard to explain.

Shad's presence is necessary for Shadow Knights to exist. His being is what keeps them in motion, so in turn, you'd think the Shadow Knights would die once Shad does.

I know @xerith-42 was thinking the difference would be between Premature SKs and Full ones. However, I think it's more dependent on how the SK was formed.

I think Shad's control is necessary for undead shadow knights. His spirit has to be around for Undead SKs to be "alive," seeing as he literally has to revive them. If Shad dies; and his spirit is gone, the undead shadow knights finally get to pass on. I think it would be more of a relief, even to those like Gene. Especially to those like Gene. He barely has any autonomy left, so once Shad is gone, he can finally think for himself, even if it's in some world beyond.

This is all different for transformed/living SKs. They are still alive, and still have life energy. Shad is only a part of them, not their entire being. So, once Shad is gone, they aren't shadow knights anymore. However, they aren't human. They are... something else. Something more empty. To be transformed, something is ripped from their soul, and replaced with something from Shad. So, when Shad is gone, that part of them is gone, and it's not replaced with anything.

So, Living SKs survive once Shad is gone, but they almost transform into something else. Something we haven't seen before. I'm not sure what that is yet. I really want opinions on what this would look like, especially in Laurance.

Council, your thoughts?

[biocrafthero]

Vaugarde Dashboard Simulator Part 2

( 25 notes )

🪨 tuesdayagain Follow

My dinnar 🔥

( 37 notes )

👁️ onlooker23694 Follow

do you guys think that Odile (one of the saviors) has a tumblr

🐇 bingbongurwrong Follow

I think some of you need therapy. Desperately.

👁️ onlooker23694 Follow

Change forbid someone on the “i wanna make out with that old lady” website actually wants to make out with that old lady

( 1,374 notes )

🪨 tuesdayagain Follow

Hope I don’t have to fight my evil shadow self today

♟️ maldupays Follow

hey

🪨 tuesdayagain Follow

HELLO????

💫 loopingloops Follow

I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU AND I DOING THIS BIT OP THIS WASN’T SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN

🪨 tuesdayagain Follow

THAT’S NOT YOUR ALT???

💫 loopingloops Follow

ITS NOT

🪨 tuesdayagain Follow

WHAT

💫 loopingloops Follow

WHAT

♟️ maldupays Follow

:3

( 465 notes )

🧪 thatonescientist Follow

Okay so Mira isn’t in the dorm right now so I just combined a Monster energy drink with some rainbow Airheads. Calling this drink battery acid. Gonna see what happens when I have some

🧪 thatonescientist Follow

don’t do this

🧪 thatonescientist Follow

i love my partner so much love always wins never give up

( 73,287 notes )

🌃 changehold Follow

WHO FOUND THIS ACCOUNT

( 238 notes )

🧱 builderboy-brickman Follow

Wait. Wait does this mean that the saviors listen to Radiohead

🧱 builderboy-brickman Follow

DON’T “of course they do” ME ITS HARD TO SEE PEOPLE LIKE THAT AS LIKE. HAVING NORMAL LIVES. THEY’RE BASICALLY SUPERHEROES!!

( 3,138 notes )

👑 fleetingmemories Follow

ohhh…. I remember when messages took weeks to send between countries……. how times have changed……… ohhhhhhh….

☄️ rumblingrocktype Follow

Hey quick question how old are you

👑 fleetingmemories Follow

oh….. in my 50s, I believe…… why do you ask?

☄️ rumblingrocktype Follow

Did you know him

( 375 notes )

🔔 pleasedontfindthisblog Follow

my thirsty ass could NEVER be near one of these things

🧤 fivesetsofhands Follow

Hey what does this mean. Hey OP what the crab does this mean

🔔 pleasedontfindthisblog Follow

you can’t prove ANYTHING

( 96,938 notes )

⚒️ etchedinstone Follow

“Is it ethical to write fanfic about the saviors of Vaugarde if their lives were adapted into a stage play and I’m just writing about the fictional versions of them” thread locked after 174 pages of heated debate

🐊 creepingthang Follow

OP this is the same energy as the Isabeau Miku Binder post

⚒️ etchedinstone Follow

THE WHAT

( 3,487 notes )

🌫️ guncraft

I need him

👓 patienthunter Follow

People like OP need to go to a mental hospital

🐺 wolvesdenguy Follow

What happened to the notes

🌞 inthehouseof Follow

Official 0 note King thirst post

( 0 notes )

🐻 amazingwonderfulfunnybuff Follow

My friends finally convinced me to make a new account after years of not using this website why is everything different

( 16 notes )

💭 lostinthoughts Follow

GUYS WHAT THE CRAB IS THAT

💭 lostinthoughts Follow

IM NOT CRABBING AROUND RIGHT NOW THIS ISN’T FUNNY THIS PHOTO ISN’T EDITED WHAT IS HAPPENING

👾 bitten8-bit Follow

the fog is coming.

( 6,937 notes )

🐾 werebearwearbare Follow

That new shade in the sky would look great in a children’s hospital

( 974 notes )

🍱 overthinkinghistorian Follow

this too is yuri

( 37,485 notes )

💀 biocrafthero Follow

You can read Part 1 here :3c

[aliferous-ly]

A ghost haunted season 10. Certainly not a malicious one, if a bit mischievous - and one had to keep a careful eye out to catch him.

Jevin heard him first, deep underground. He was hunting iron, early in the season, and he was having the worst luck. He even looked up where iron should be, to make sure the updates hadn't changed anything! Alas, the iron evaded him. Jevin might have to resort to begging and then jump straight to a farm.

And he kept hearing these crackly, faint snickers. At first he thought he'd been on a voice channel accidentally, but, no, his comm wasn't connected. Then, just to make sure, he disconnected it entirely - but the laughter prevailed. Jevin chalked it up to too many sleepless nights, and went to find an overachieving hermit already building an iron farm.

Stress heard him next, but as someone who heard murmuring monsters on a good day, she didn't give it a second thought. Clear as day she heard an, "oh, bugger." She thought, you and me both, monster, before going along with her day.

Then it was Xisuma, though he didn't hear anyone, he saw. It was a mere glimmer out of the corner of his eye. White hair, stout, pickaxe slung lovingly over a shoulder. When he looked back there was nothing. He resolved to run diagnostics on his helmet, because something was clearly haywire.

And in Joel's defense, he was both exhausted and brand new to hermitcraft. It wasn't like people had nametags on, they were a group of friends! So when an old man grumbled by, lost as could be within the shopping district, Joel furrowed his brows but ultimately was too tired to ruminate. He overheard the man saying something about shroomlights and called out, "Tango has the permit, but he doesn't have a shop up yet!"

The man startled, muttered something about "permits?" before scuttling off like a spooked horse. Joel shrugged. It was called hermitcraft, after all. There had to be loads of people he hadn't met yet.

Small instances added up. Scar fell asleep making a tree, hidden amongst the branches, and was spooked awake by the sound of a player dying. But when he checked his comm, nothing showed up. A dream, he thought uneasily.

I just need sleep, Tango thought.

Wow, someone's wearing a sick costume, Skizz thought. Too bad I'm too busy to go chat right now!

Who's messing with my hourglass now? Doc thought. Only, there wasn't anyone else on the server at the time. Probably an armor stand prank.

It all came to head when Hypno stumbled across his fifth stripmine in one mining session. He rolled his eyes, because of course Wels had created tunnels beneath Hypno's place just to be a nuisance. Except when he pointed it out to Wels, who was on call with Hypno but was busy caving, Wels expressed confusion.

"I've only made one or two strip mines. And they're not near you," Wels said.

Hypno saw a wisp of white hair turning a corner. "Haha, very funny, Wels. Come on out."

"I'm not joking?" Wels said in confusion. In the same beat he got the achievement for sneaking successfully past a shrieker for the first time and Hypno was far too high up to be near an ancient city.

"Maybe it's someone else?" Hypno murmured, checking who was online. Grian and Joel, who were having their own shenanigans blowing up the comms (it involved TNT, so the blowing up was quite literal). Impulse had just left. Etho, who could be a contender if Hypno didn't know he'd fallen asleep at the post office three hours ago. Plus, what sort of prank would this be, from Etho?

He explored the endless strip mines and got so lost that he had to dig his way up. When he mentioned the strangeness to Keralis, the man lit up and exclaimed that he'd found the same thing, how weird was that, huh?

Hypno investigated. If there was a bug in the world he'd need to know.

"You know, it might not be a bug," Cleo said meaningfully. They fidgeted with a tear in their clothes.

"What else would it be?" Hypno asked, mystified.

"Maybe it's a player. You know. Someone we never removed from the whitelist."

Cleo raised an eyebrow. It wasn't in their nature to beat around the bush, but at the same time they didn't want to act crass. Not for this.

Tentative realization trickled through Hypno. He nodded and abruptly left, unsure how to feel.

The information spread slowly through the rest of the server. Joe took to leaving boxes of torches and iron pickaxes about, and every so often would have to refill them. He didn't ask, but everyone swore they hadn't been stealing. Who would need an iron pickaxe at this point, anyway?

One night, Cub let off a slew of fireworks that were spherical and solid green. He heard a faint chuckle on the breeze, and raised a drink in quiet salute.

So, yes. A ghost haunted season 10. But ghost haunting had such a negative connotation, didn't it? The hermits, if they spoke about him at all, much preferred to call him the True Hermit who never left.

[talkbycolor]

I deserve this

A/N; at this point its obvious that i inspire in rebzyyx songs

Pairing; "Your Boyfriend" x AFAB!Reader (cus people are scared of the word trans)

CW; reader becomes willing at the end i swear / unhealthy, obsessive and possesive love / sensitive topics such as mental health, depression, anxiety, fear of abandonment, dissociation, suicidal thoughts / a crazy concept: he talks about his emotions!! / non-con, violence, like, i cry while i masturbate

It's quite blurry trying to remember how it all started, it seemed harmless to accept a date from a stranger, he gave you a beautiful rose and was quite kind to you.

Feeling that people could like you, that someone could be romantically interested in you, because of who you are, your personality, that they knew your… desires?

Because you had dreams, of course.

…

Your dream was to live, to live a quiet life, a stable, pleasant job, with good pay, a normal and peaceful life, where the deep emptiness in your heart was non-existent, years had passed and the monotonous feeling did not disappear, you had already accepted the pain, after all, if you felt that constantly it was probably because you did something wrong at some point, right?

But that was a personal dream that would never be shared.

And it's not like that matters now, not when you're in… A room, that's funny, your last memory is of Peter slamming you against the table to tie your limbs since their last date didn't end as expected and It was time to go home.

Return to an empty home, for what? Peter was more than willing to take care of you, why was he so scary? Accepting it would have made things easier, but you ruined everything by trying to run away, you even fought tooth and nail, that was too pathetic now that you remember it, maybe you DO deserve all the shit that is happening.

You could have saved yourself so much terror and attacks.

"PETER ENOUGH! PLEASE! LET ME GO! NO! NO! FUCK, PLEASE!" You tore out your throat with terrified screams and tried to claw at his skin until your fingers were bloody, biting the hands that tried to stop your screams, hitting his face with your elbows and kicking him away, crawling like a dying animal away from him. "PETER!" You sobbed sharply before losing consciousness.

But nothing worked, resisting only made all that shit worse and now you were tied up, in Your boyfriend's old clothes.

You barely remember how you got to that place, or if time passed, anyway that doesn't matter anymore, from one day to the next you find a very small piece of clothing that turned out to be yours, time passed, your body grew but your mind didn't, they keep lying but you know that your life will depend on how well you do it.

And you're not doing it right, you tried to adopt toxic happiness but you couldn't even maintain it for a while before exploding, sadness was already an everyday thing and you just weren't feeling it anymore.

"Dear?"

Just peace please, how hard could that be? It was annoying, you even felt angry for feeling so empty, because people were so rude and the constant rejection killed you socially.

It was hard to breathe, wasn't it?

"Love? Do you hear me?"

It feels like the end, your soul is bleeding, you wish your stupid job made you feel a little more alive and motivated to continue.

And now you have done so many things to escape from that monster that pulls you back to the room to devour you under the bed.

"Darling!" Your boyfriend's voice echoed through the room, making you look at him once and for all, your eyes tired despite having been unconscious most of the time.

"…" You wanted to respond, really, but what were you supposed to say?

"You must be exhausted, you didn't even touch dinner" It was a tricky phrase, he had tried to feed you since you were tied up.

"Peter-…"

"I already told you that I prefer to be called other way, honey" He responded with a smile and a definitely not irritated tone.

"I want to sleep" He left your lips, he was being so caring, taking care of your health.

He kidnapped you.

And you couldn't even thank him for it.

He knocked you out.

You really were an ungrateful shit, weren't you?

He locked you up.

You wanted to return the signs of affection.

Soon the ropes left your body, Peter helped you stand up and you both walked to the bedroom, he was still carrying a small plate with a light dinner, he refused to let you go to bed without having eaten dinner.

Once in bed, he made sure that you had a proper dinner, and he helped you change your clothes so that you would be comfortable in bed, he also did the same with his attire and now you were both lying down. It always made your stomach churn when he looked at your half-naked body.

"Dear" He murmured next to you while you tried to sleep as soon as possible, so many things had happened those last few days that the only way out was to sleep, you had probably already been fired from your job for not showing up. "Honey, love, darling," he said sweetly as his hand went up to your cheek, he simply looked at you with a huge and probably painful smile on his face, almost tattooed, you made him so happy with your mere presence.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked, your mind still cloudy enough to refuse anything, so you just went up to kiss him, the room was very dark and there weren't even crickets echoing at night, the amount of silence was overwhelming… of course, that didn't count the lip-smacking they shared.

So it continued.

For a long time.

"Pet-…uhm, I mean, honey, I'm tired and I want to sleep" You interrupted the honey session.

"Please, you don't have to do anything, just let me love you, darling" his voice was soft, soothing to that darkness but not to the painful weight in your heart and the knot in your stomach, his touches felt strange.

You know that's wrong, you don't like it.

You didn't stop him, just like he said, you let him love you as you closed your eyes and a buzzing sound echoed in your head, like television static, your bottom clothes had disappeared, but that didn't matter.

You couldn't hear anything, you didn't see anything, your body reacted but your mind was very far from that place, you wandered through your memories, fantasies of a life you were never going to have.

It was really digging into your cunt, huh? Even when your mind wanted to flee somewhere else, it was undeniable how he held your thighs and you gasped heavily with each thrust.

His member was still dripping his seed, did he use protection? You don't know, you don't care.

It doesn't matter.

B e cau se s oon y o u w il l b e d ea d.

"Honey? Didn't you enjoy it?" Peter asked with a worried frown.

What the hell is wrong with you? Do you no longer have respect for yourself? You know it's going to hurt you.

Don't you mind dying? You lost hope and you don't even try to help yourself anymore, damned and pathetic attempt at being human, really unnecessary.

"Honey…" Peter caressed your cheeks and brought his forehead to yours, sighing softly and carrying your body to the bathroom in the room.

You didn't say anything either, you just felt how it was cleaning your body, the water was warm, the bathtub full of bubbles, and it smelled pretty good, like coconut soap. Peter hummed quietly as he treated your body with the utmost affection, you were sure he was whispering things in your ear but you were barely aware of your surroundings.

When your eyes finally focused on something you could see the ceiling of the room thanks to the moonlight, Peter was behind you, hugging your body, caressing your hair, and sniffing the soapy fragrance.

"You are so sweet, so unique, so kind, so special to me, a truly exceptional person, I will do everything to make you feel comfortable, darling, I love you so much, my adorable-…"

"Peter"

"… Yes love?" This time he didn't argue about that name, you were finally talking and that was good.

"I'm sorry I feel so alone, I know you're here but…" You wish you could give him an answer but that was something even you hadn't figured out yet.

"It's okay, honey, I'll be with you to hold you, forever."

♡

[a-substantial-trash-pile]

hey guess what. it's finally time for my Stardew Valley Loredump. i’m about to ramble about my farmer and yo-yo/yoba and shane in a probably long-ass, disjointed post because i have a problem ok. not expecting anyone to read it all of course—just want to finally write these brainstorming shenanigans down. the loredump will be below the cut below the image 👇 (WARNING: IT'S LONG):

SAMUEL IZAWA:

*samuel is 28 years old, pan, japanese okinawan (no im not self projecting hahaha), and goes by he/they. main thing is that they’re from “our world” where stardew valley is a video game, but he died and ended up in the stardew universe. because i think isekai tropes are fun and silly. as the player, samuel can do things others in the stardew world can’t do, such as: 

summon the in-game HUD that’s only visible to him, so he can see health/energy levels and inventory and all that.

speaking of inventory, it’s essentially a pocket dimension samuel can shove stuff in. the inventory doesn’t really care about size/weight/etc as long as it’s something the system considers an “item.” so like samuel can put a whole ass four poster bed in there but he can’t do that to a person or a whole house. samuel just needs to touch the item to make it disappear into his inventory. he can then summon it back out when he needs it. the game’s inventory limit system remains the same. samuel gets 12 slots on their own, but if they have a bag on them it increases to 36.

can access the player menu you can normally access in game. so like profile, skills, collections, relationships, etc are all there. no options or quit tab though. having the relationship tab is a nightmare for samuel, who has major insecurities about what people think of him. that tab is a quantifiable measure on how much people like him. it a real brain demon for him to know it exists and is right there for him to access anytime. 

can see the “stats” of food and healing items. hp/energy recovery amounts, buffs, etc. 

*funny thing is that samuel has never played SDV himself and only has knowledge based on what he’s heard and seen online secondhand. ironically he was planning on playing the game for the first time before the whole dying thing ruined it. they can’t even remember how they died, but it doesn’t bother them as much as they think it should. they didn’t leave much behind in that life.

*anyway, i’m talking a lot of game terms here, but don’t get it twisted. while samuel has all these game systems going on, the SDV world is very much a real one that doesn’t normally work by that logic. by that i mean time flows normally like in our world and there isn’t just 4 months in a year. things exist outside the valley. there’s a whole planet of places and people. 

*luckily samuel has help in navigating this new world in the form of yo-yo the junimo, who is the first living thing samuel sees when he first wakes up in that joja cubicle. yo-yo helps explain a lot of things and guide samuel around in its own abrasive way. he’s also there to be like, “hey i gave you a second chance at life so you kinda owe me actually. sign this contract.” and samuel, who is a pushover and also confused, is just like, “ok.” (yo-yo sounds like danny devito btw. because i think it’s funny.) 

*i call the contract a ���magical girl contract” because that’s essentially what it is. samuel gets access to extra powers/abilities on top the stuff he can already do as a player. in return he fights monsters n shit for yo-yo and generally does things for them that they can’t do easily on their own. the extra benefits include: 

higher pain tolerance. which isn’t always a good thing. especially when you tend to not be great with self-preservation like samuel is. 

can heal most injuries by just eating/drinking stuff to regain hp.

yo-yo can teleport the both of them around as needed, but it’s tiring and it drains a lot of magic. distance matters too.

yo-yo can spawn items but it drains magic as well. the more valuable/rare the item, the more draining it is. spawning items is already a magic-intensive thing in the first place. also yo-yo isn’t creating the item out of nothing. they’re actually randomly taking it from wherever it already exists in the world. for example, say yo-yo “spawns” a jar of pickles. somebody in the world is going to open their fridge and discover their jar of pickles is missing or maybe a grocery store will have a sudden empty spot on its shelf. yo-yo doesn’t have control of where the items are taken from (or so they claim).

samuel and yo-yo’s magic pools became connected so they can both do more than they could do on their own before. this is one of the reasons why yo-yo wanted a contract with samuel, who has a larger magic pool than normal due to being from another world. but it’s possible for one side to use up all the magic for the both of them. 

*samuel’s personality can be summed up as Awkward People-Pleasing Tired Sad Garbage Dork. either he’s dressed like a grandparent in sweaters and turtlenecks or he’s wearing a button up shirt with the collar undone and jeans. they usually have their neck covered in public to hide the mark of yoba embedded there. he has a “resting bitch face” as some may call, but that’s just because his brain is busy over-analyzing 193828 different things. he loves being outside in the grass and dirt, looking at bugs n shit. he’s also a nerd who likes to play video games and ramble about the lore in them (he likes RPGs the most, but if the game’s got a good story and cool world, he’s into it). they like to do things with their hands like model building/painting. in their new stardew life, they get into woodcarving after willy teaches them the basics (he carves shane a little chicken). 

*samuel does NOT know how to say “no.” absolute pushover. their self-worth is based on how much they’re liked by others, which isn’t healthy obviously. he has a fear that the only way he can be liked is by being useful. he’s scared that he is inherently a bad and selfish person, because he can’t say for sure if he’s helping others purely out of kindness or because it just makes him feel better about existing. deep down there’s anger/frustration that’s accumulated over the years, anger towards himself and also others because he’s always doing things for other people—going above and beyond—but it never feels like enough. at the same time though, they hate it when these thoughts come up because they believe that you shouldn’t go into helping somebody expecting that you’ll get something out of it. he hates how much of a hypocrite he is. he hates how he bases so much of his self-worth on the opinions of others, but feels helpless to it. they usually just push these emotions down because samuel feels guilty about them. how can they be a good person if they’re thinking like this? how can they deserve to exist with this mindset? however they get a chance to let out the anger/bitterness/frustration through fighting monsters. kind of disassociating in a way. this also isn’t a good thing because his demeanor is much colder and scarier during combat. having someone who’s felt powerless for so long suddenly gain power is a dangerous thing.

*this mindset when monster fighting shatters when samuel meets krobus and realizes that monsters aren’t just the simple enemy NPCs their brain had been automatically categorizing them as. guilt galore. he gets real depressed about that for a while but yo-yo, krobus, and shane are there to help him. 

*SPEAKING OF SHANE… it’s crush at first sight for samuel because hot damn is shane their type. i mean just look at him. mamma mia. haha anyyyway, they first meet at the stardrop saloon. samuel’s waiting at the bar for his to-go order near where shane is drinking. shane’s looking sad, so samuel gives in and decides they’ll start a convo to maybe distract him from whatever’s bothering him. samuel employs the “crack a dumb joke to hide the fact that i’m nervous because i’m talking to a hot person and then use that opening to introduce myself” strat. shane, being an asshole, is like, “oh so you’re the new farmer. here’s a tip: don’t bother me.” samuel takes 999 damage and their brain immediately goes “THIS IS MY FAULT I FUCKED UP like who wants to be talked to by a stranger when they’re sad goddammit why am i so bad at this?!!” it’s overall not a great first impression. after that, samuel tries to avoid shane out of embarrassment, but circumstances keep making them run into each other. for instance, samuel works a lot with marnie with her being a mentor figure to him in animal husbandry, so he and shane have a lot of opportunity to interact through that (plus marnie is secretly trying to get them closer to each other). through these meetings and shenanigans, samuel and shane get to know each other better until one day they’re friends. then good friends. then best friends. then kiss friends. then marry friends. :)

YOBA (A.K.A. YO-YO): 

*yo-yo is ????? years old and goes by any pronouns but most of the time it's it/they.

*yo-yo is actually THE yoba, but they’re not the completely benevolent creator-of-all-things humans have made them out to be. maybe they were in the past, but now they’re selfish and rude and swear a lot. but they do still care, even if they don’t admit it (tsundere-ass). yoba is currently stuck in the form of a little junimo and is substantially weakened because it gave too much of itself away to the world in the past and got burned for it. because the world kept taking and taking. and now there’s war and pollution and shit and yoba/yo-yo is maybe just a teensy tiny bit angry and bitter now. but it’s ok because now they got this human from another reality to help them reclaim the pieces of itself. and maybe along the way relearn how to love the world again.  

*oh also yoba didn’t create the whole planet like the creation story claims. they’re technically an alien that came across a young planet full of life and decided to stay and help it develop. 

*main reason yo-yo made a contract with samuel is because it needs help finding/reclaiming the pieces of itself. pieces can usually be found in strong monsters empowered by the piece. this isn’t always the case though. sometimes it’s in an ancient artifact. sometimes it’s in a specific place like a temple. sometimes it’s in a person. 

*samuel doesn’t have to deal with having an existential crisis about yo-yo, since he’s from our world where yoba doesn’t even exist as a god. yo-yo claims to be the one responsible for bringing samuel over into the stardew universe, but there are holes in their story. where did yoba even find the power to do such a thing when they’re in such a weakened state? mysterious. 

*the first time yoba reveals itself to shane is kind of chaotic. it’s in the middle of the night when yo-yo suddenly appears in shane’s room, grabs his face with its little stick arms and yells, “WAKE UP!!! YOUR BOYFRIEND IS IN MORTAL PERIL!!!” shane is like, “WHAT THE F–”     it was an act of desperation on yo-yo’s part, because samuel was in trouble and shane was the only one it could think of going to for help. essentially samuel meets something Bad in the deep mines, something that takes him out of commission and puts him in a trance state while draining his lifeforce. y’know, the classic kind of trance state where you need to figure out how to get the person back–how to snap them out of it. yo-yo tried and failed, so that’s where shane comes in. it’s the classic “love-interest-breaks-main-character-out-of-mind-control-with-sheer-power-of-love” trope. except shane does punch samuel during it. lovingly. in the face. hey it works ok.     after the chaos is over and everyone’s safe and gathered together, samuel and yo-yo explain everything to shane (well more like samuel explains everything while yo-yo wishes outloud that they had their memory erasing powers back). shane, who is canonically an atheist, learns that this talking pottymouthed jerkass apple is actually THE yoba and is just like, “yeah. this might as well happen.” and then he remains atheist because what else are you going to do when you learn that god is a talking pottymouthed jerkass apple who calls you a bitch and is also responsible for your partner having to go do dangerous shit. he and yo-yo have a rocky relationship at first to say the least. but once they both realize how much the other cares about samuel, things get a little better. 

*yeah, yoba may be a bitch and they may be angry and they may be bitter, but they really do care, even if they try to convince themselves otherwise. even though so much got taken from it, it still cares about humans and dwarves and shadow people and everything else on the planet. and when it eventually comes down to it, yoba will step up to protect what it loves, even if it means losing everything again. 

SHANE FINCH: 

*this post was technically supposed to just be about my farmer and yo-yo’s lore and stuff, but i gotta give some personal headcanons i have about shane… like for instance his last name is “finch.” because i thought the bird theme was cute. he’s 29 years old, bi, and half asian, half white (in our world that asian half is korean). i’m not being specific because i don’t know if korea even exists in the stardew world, since all we know in the game is that there’s a “ferngill republic” and a “gotoro empire.” i was thinking of just headcanoning that stardew’s planet is essentially the same as earth. so like most of the same countries/nations exist except the history diverged a bit along the way, leading to the ferngill republic and gotoro empire. OK SORRY for the tangent—back on topic.

*so shane is a trans man who started transitioning back in high school. he had two best friends who were very supportive and really helped him on his journey to figure himself out. those two friends were like family to him. it was good that he had this support because his parents were always pretty shitty and shane transitioning just made them act even shittier. the only good family member of shane’s is marnie, who was supportive, but she lived far away, was busy, AND wasn’t on good terms with her sister (shane’s mom), so shane didn’t get to see her much. 

*the moment shane became a legal adult, he got away from his parents, finding a place with his two best friends and moving in together. oh and his friends’ names were rosa and heath. should’ve probably mentioned that earlier oops.     shane, rosa, and heath go to the same college together, suffer student loans, graduate, etc. haven’t thought of what shane would get a degree in yet—most likely something “generic” because he’s unsure of what he wants to do himself (i feel u bby). 

*ok so rosa and heath were dating since high school, but they were so comfortable with shane and vice versa that things never got that awkward living together. however when rosa and heath got married (“yoba, FINALLY,” shane would say), shane felt like it was time to find his own place, much to the devastation of his bffs. the apartment ended up close to where rosa and heath lived of course—the couple made sure of it (“stop backseating my apartment hunting!” “MAKE US”). 

*rosa and heath get pregnant and have a healthy baby girl that they name jasmine. i headcanon jas as black (from heath’s side) and portuguese (rosa’s side). everyone is thrilled about the baby. shane was immediately offered godfather role and he happily accepted. jas was the cutest baby ever and he adored her. he babysat jas all the time. 

*jas was 4 years old when rosa and heath tragically passed away in a car accident. they were coming home from a business dinner when they lost control of their car on some black ice and slid into oncoming traffic. shane was babysitting jas when he got the call. in the span of one cold winter night, shane and jas’s world shattered. 

*rosa and heath didn’t have any reliable relatives either. those relatives only came to take the money and belongings. shane was the only one jas had, so he adopted her. he tried his best to pick up the pieces. he really did. he lasted for a year trying to raise a kid on his own with the salary of a dead-end job, but he knew the situation wasn’t good with the money and how much his mental health was spiraling. he knew he and jas were in dire need of more support (“jas deserves better than this”). so he turned to the one person he had left to rely on: his aunty marnie. and that’s how shane and jas ended up in pelican town.

*shane’s joja jacket was actually originally rosa’s. rosa worked as an accountant for joja and would get free promotional items all the time from the company. the jacket was one of the only things she actually ended up using because “it’s pretty comfy for being joja bs.” she would wear it all the time, much to her more fashion-conscious husband’s chagrin (yet he would patch up any holes she’d get in it anyway). after rosa died, shane kept her jacket. there were a lot of memories in it. 

~~~

ok that’s it for now. if anyone actually read all that, thank you for even wasting your time to process my ramblings. i’m sorry it’s so fucking long like jfc.

*who is mr. qi?

[marvelfanfn2187a113]

Tickle…Spider?

Sam and Dean Winchester x little sister!reader

Requested by Anonymous

Synopsis: Dean gets back at you for a prank

“What the…” Dean’s jaw dropped as he approached the Impala. “What is this? Sam?”

“Don’t look at me,” Sam couldn’t hide his chuckle as he picked at one of the many glittery stickers covering Baby. “I wish I could take credit for this.”

“Dude, this is not funny! Who-“ Dean froze, examining the stickers carefully.

“What?” Sam noticed the change.

“Do you see how these are placed?” A slow smirk spread across Dean’s face. “Every single one is low on the car, and there’s not one towards the middle of the hood.”

“So?” Sam asked, before he realized. “Y/N. She couldn’t reach.”

“I’m gonna kill her.”

“Dean, she’s five. She didn’t know-“

“Not to put stickers on my Baby? The heck she didn’t know, she-“

A muffled giggle cut off the rest of Dean’s statement. He turned, trying to find where you were hiding.

“Alright, come on out kiddo,” Dean demanded. When you went silent, he sighed. “I won’t be mad if you come out now.” Still nothing. “I won’t tell dad,” he coaxed, and finally your head popped out from behind a nearby vending machine.

“Hey there,” Dean smirked, and you didn’t have time to run before he snatched you up, carrying you into the motel room. Sam followed hesitantly.

“What are you gonna do?”

“I’m gonna bring out an old enemy to show our baby sister here a lesson,” Dean said as he dropped you onto his bed.

“The tickle m—uh…spider?” Sam questioned with a grin.

“Dude, we can use the M word when talking about the tickle monster,” Dean whispered.

Since you were only five, the boys had been forced to develop a sort of code language whenever they talked about hunts. Your current dislike of spiders let the boys to use that word instead of “monsters”, since you never wanted to listen to them talk about “spiders”.

“What are you doing?” You giggled, wriggling around in a futile attempt to get out of Dean’s arms.

“Uh-uh,” Dean said, pinning you down. “You asked for this, and you’re not getting out of it.”

“I’m sorry!” You whined.

“No no no, those puppy dog eyes work in Sammy, not on me, kid.”

Your whining turned suddenly to shrieking as Dean jabbed at your ribs.

“Whoa, easy tiger,” Dean laughed. The people next door are gonna think we’re torturing you.”

“Yo-hou are!” You squealed, struggling as Dean continued scratch at your stomach.

“No baby, what you did to the Impala was torture, this is just having a little fun.”

“Sa-ha-ammy, help!”

Sam shook his head, trying to hide his grin.

“You messed with the Impala, sweetheart, you shoulda known better.”

Dean continued his assault, digging his fingers between your ribs as you struggled helplessly. Sam elbowed his brother when your laughter went silent.

“I think she’s had enough.”

“Just one more thing,” Dean chuckled. He leaned down to where your shirt had ridden up, and you found your voice again, squealing loudly as Dean blew a raspberry on your stomach. “Now I’m done.”

Dean lifted you into his arms, and you giggled softly against the side of his neck.

“No more,” you insisted.

“Hey, stay away from Baby and we have a deal,” Dean said.

“Ok,” you were silent for a moment, then- “I didn’t mean to make you mad, I’m sorry. I thought it was funny.”

“It was!” Sam called from the side of the room. Dean shot him a glare before turning away, reaching a hand up to cradle your head.

“I’m not mad, baby. Just don’t do it again.”

“Do you think they’ll come off?”

“How about this?” Dean said as he carried you towards the door. “How about you and me go and find out, then once they’re all off the car we’ll call it even. That sound like a plan, baby?”

You giggled as Dean lightly tickled your side.

“It’s a plan, Dean-o.”

[lilislegacy]

Percy doing a little bit (or a lot) of everything

i know everyone won’t agree with this future for him, but humor me

percy in college figuring out that he doesn’t want to be stuck in a lab, but he wants to make a difference. he can talk to animals. he wants to use that ability for good. he wants to help animals in some way

percy wanting to become a veterinarian for aquatic animals. he doubts himself, becasue it takes someone smart and hard-working, but annabeth has full faith in him. and he finds he actually really likes learning about how sea animals function, and how to help them. once he’s a vet, he knows he made the right choice. he loves going to work every day, wherever that is. an aquarium, a marine clinic, the ocean, it doesn’t matter. he listens to the animals and helps them in a way that no other vet on earth can. his co-workers call him the animal whisperer. (which he finds funny, because he’s not whispering, just having a normal semi-telepathic conversation)

while he’s preparing for vet school, percy has an experience that makes him begin to take notice of people and animals dying in fires. he figures “i’m fire resistant. i can control water. im strong. i think quick on my feet… i can help.” so throughout vet school, he’s a firefighter. he loves it. he gets to save people every day. he gets action. he thrives. he saves so many lives. he even takes ownership of the fire house’s new dog - a dalmatian-shepherd mix. he says it’s just for a bit, but the dog ends up as his and annabeth’s family pet (which annabeth totally knew would happen). but he loves being a firefighter. it makes him feel like he’s using his abilities to help people, not just kill endless amounts of monsters. he actually feels like a real hero this way.

percy becoming certified as a professional diver so he can do deep sea rescues, for animals mainly, but he ends up doing human rescues too. in tragedies like the thai cave rescue, he’s there. he’s the pro diver on call for an emergency - human or animal related. he’ll dive any depth to save a life. he’ll even just do it to help researchers, or historians, or anyone, really. and he never charges much, if anything at all.

percy volunteering as a marine wildlife rescuer. he’ll answer a call, day or night. he’ll help get a shark off the beach, cut rope off of a whale, save sea turtles caught in a net. it doesn’t matter, he’s there. and it’s nothing new for him.

percy maybe even writhing a book or two over the course of his life.

percy going on some boat expeditions, which he always leads.

percy maybe even one day teaching, when he’s older and his kids are grown. whether it’s 12 year olds with dyslexia or whether he’s teaching a college class on aquatic animals or greek history. he’d be good at it. he’s patient.

percy doing multiple great things throughout his life. percy using his experiences and abilities for good. percy not letting his past - being kicked out of every school, making bad grades, being thought of as stupid - define him. not letting his past stop him.

percy doing a little bit (or a lot) of everything. becasue he can. becasue he’s alive. becasue he’s talented. becasue he’s intelligent. and because he has a huge heart.

and he has the most supportive partner in the whole world.

percy thriving in life.

[yanderes-galore]

I may have Yandere Alastor desperate and insane... Topo remember the last chapter where Alastor goes insane after the battle of Adam... Now imagine another reader goes looking for him and finds him in this state... Perhaps the reader tries to console (the reader has a pure soul)

Having a pure soul in Hell? Ironic. However, maybe that's why he wants yours so bad? Just going to say this, I am not the biggest fan of how this came out. This was meant to be how you're meet your yandere but Darling seems so out of place in this prompt :( I'll take feedback on this as I can probably do something better in the future.

Aftermath

Yandere! Alastor Short

Pairing: Dubious

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, OOC Alastor, Manipulation, Possessive behavior, Sadism, Forced companionship (?)

Vulnerability... Alastor has always hated such a thing.

Even more so when he's driven to it.

Alastor doesn't like being vulnerable. He's used to being powerful and showing he's powerful. He likes it when people fear him.

But here he is, nearly at the brink of death because he tried to help Charlie and her friends.

Friends... How funny...

He hates this damn deal he has.

Alastor feels he's going feral as he sits in his old radio tower. It hasn't been touched in years and clearly has fallen into disrepair. Despite it all... It remains a temporary sanctuary for him to lick his wounds.

The others must be so happy... all smiles at their big victory...

Yet he's here cleaning the blood off his suit.

Alastor is used to being alone. He finds comfort in the silence of the radio tower as he listens to his own labored breathing. It's a small respite...

Until he hears footsteps.

The deer demon turns around quickly when he senses a presence in the door way. He's shaking, weak, and he hates it. The sinner in front of him looks much weaker than him...

Yet he glares anyway.

You had heard strange noises coming from the old decrepit tower. A combination of thunking and pained noises. Being curious, you entered to find out what was going on.

Only to be confronted by one of Hell's worst monsters.

"Well isn't your concern cute..." Alastor dryly comments with a laugh as he tries to be charming. "Your fear is better."

Alastor expects you to turn tail and run like most demons. He could see you quivering yet you never ran. Were you frozen in fear?

Then you snap out of it, approaching him like he's a wounded animal.

You notice his wounds and he thinks you're a fool. In fact, your behavior reminds him of Charlie and it makes him wonder just how you got into Hell. You perplex him...

Which is why he recoils with a growl when he sees you try to touch him.

"Do you need help...?" You ask and Alastor still looks unhinged when staring at you.

Help? Alastor doesn't need help. He's fine alone. But... The idea of toying with you may distract him from his pain.

"Help?" Alastor chuckles. "Geez, I never thought I'd come across such a kind sinner. You don't belong here, do you?" Alastor grins as he beckons you closer.

"You want to help, do you?" Alastor bitterly murmurs. "Fine... Entertain me, then. It will help."

Alastor originally called you over to provide him begrudging comfort. Yet as time passed and he healed, he found your soul... sickeningly sweet. It's hard to believe you'd do anything all that horrible.

Alastor is not someone who typically enjoys being vulnerable to anyone. Yet he found himself watching you as you chatted to him. He leans on his hand, ears flicking as he seems oddly calm.

If he didn't know any better, he'd think you were meant to be a fallen angel.

It's actually... Nice to be in your presence within this rotting tower.

Alastor makes dry comments or charming muses towards you, only to see you smile. He hates to admit it but his ears perk up when he sees your smile. You're charming in your own right....

Alastor doesn't let you touch him, but the idea is intriguing to him. He finds himself wondering how it would feel to have your comfort all the time. Then he thinks about that strange soul of yours...

He has an idea.

"My dear, have you ever thought of getting out of here?" Alastor hums, a large grin on his face.

"Out of this tower?"

"No, silly... Out of Hell?"

"That's... an option?"

Your curiosity is amusing yet oddly adorable as Alastor clicks his claws on the tower's metal. He nods with a chuckle, already plotting on what to do with his new toy.

"There's a new hotel a friend of mine is hosting..." Alastor continues, placing a clawed hand on your shoulder. "She says she can redeem sinners and I think you've got it in you... Want to give it a shot, doll?"

At your nod, Alastor can't help but feel giddy. It's great that you agreed so readily. You're probably so desperate to have a different afterlife...

Yet he's taking advantage of you.

"Here, take my hand, we'll work out all the details later..." Alastor encourages, holding your hand in a firm handshake before he pulls you closer. "You'll be a great new guest. I assure you, you'll be taken care of."

In reality, Alastor wants to introduce you to the new hotel in order to continue having you close. You've piqued his interest and now he finds himself wanting more. Surely you should know to not trust a charming face?

Too late now, it seems... as Alastor is already tugging you through a portal. Could you be redeemed? Maybe.

But Alastor was never going to allow that to happen... No, Alastor wants to corrupt you more...

You'll think he's helping you... You'll trust him...

Yet the second you agree to a deal with him, thinking he's just trying to help, you'll be all his and there's nothing you can do about it.

[goodolddumbbanana]

Nexus to Moon: dramatic, mysterious, evil.

He is the monster. He forced me kneel, he hurts me, he makes me relived of all my mistakes. I couldn't fight him and the worst of it..... I. Scared. Of. Him.

Nexus to Sun: Bitch wants me to work for him and gets mad when I say no. Also... Cringe.

I am sorry but, has anyone felt a really drastically shift tones between Moon and Sun when they interact with Nexus?

Like Nexus really wants to hurt Moon, badly. He does not hesitate to cram his hands inside Moon's head, and mocks Moon for everything he did. It was intense, and we can feel it is Nexus the one who is in the control. And that Moon will not do or can try anything.

Also Moon gets kneel down and tortured pretty quick after that. Also he seems very scared of Nexus after each time he interacted with Nexus.

But Sun... I don't know man... I think I had made Nexus cooler in my head.

He is just so cringe. (THE GOD thingy makes me die a little bit whenever I hear him screaming that name)

I couldn't see the monster who hurt Moon with the way he was chasing Sun around and Sun just kept running like it is no ends tomorrow.

(Lmao dude just straight up pulling Naruto run on Nexus, really reminds me back then, of the times when Sun doing something stupid and Nexus just angrily yelling ran after him.)

And even when he had Sun at the corner, he couldn't say anything 'emotional damage' to Sun.

"What ... Are you insane?!"

"Yeah. I thought it was pretty obvious."

And baby girl is so obsessed with the fact he is no longer Moon, he thinks it is him who is still the one Sun calls for help. Which is sad and funny both at the same time.

Like we can feel a tiny small hesitant in Nexus's voice when Sun keeps saying 'Moon', like he thought Sun wants him to stop.

And how the issue gets dragged on the surface. Sun always feels like he couldn't help Nexus and Nexus also feels like he couldn't let Sun help him. (Because the same old story, Sun got hurt and kidnapped whenever he came with Nexus.)

"So now I have value for you?"

"Yeah, for once in your miserable life, you have value."

It is sad when they come back at each other like this. Especially when Nexus always says that he needs Sun back in the day.

"You had friends, you had a family. They love you."

Sun loves him. He still loves Nexus. He didn't want Nexus dead is one thing, but he seems so worried about Nexus (accidentally calling him Moon when seeing him got shot) and tries to make Monty stop shooting. Even after Nexus runway, Sun - the one who gets so infected by Negative Star power, still wants to know if Nexus is okay.

And when he was back at home, he wasn't even scared of Nexus, not like how he used to be terrified of Eclipse or Killcode or even when he interacts with Dark Sun. He seems just pissed and done at himself, and not even with Nexus.

"I didn't have friends. I was a replacement."

Nexus didn't consider Monty his friend. I mean it is totally understandable, especially when they hijacked his head before. But replacement... Really? Sure maybe at first with Sun, but what about Earth? She didn't know jack about you?

"Maybe at first, but I liked you."

Haha... Remember when Nexus said he was very appreciative of how Sun loved him more than Moon? Haha... Good times ...

"oh my..., cuz I was nicer to you."

"because you are nice."

"because I didn't beat you.... Guess what Sunny, you are nothing but a tool for me..."

He throws away any good things he did for Sun. He burned all their memories, and saw himself as a monster. He tried to make himself a monster towards Sun, and when seeing it didn't work, because Sun doesn't care about how horrible he is now, he straight down Sun with the 'I don't care about you' attitude.

"You know what... You are not worse than Moon. Hell you are not even better..."

'You are just exactly like Moon. ' I think it is what Sun wants to say. They are both so stuck in their own minds, never wanting to hear what other people say, what people are trying to prove they are so much better than this.

"I am me! NONE OF YOU COULD REALISE, I AM MY OWN PERSON!!!"

"I tried."

"No you didn't. You USED me. And now I am going to use you."

"I am sorry."

His voice seems so small. He sounds so heartbroken when he says sorry to Nexus, like we can feel the thought process behind Sun. He truly thinks everything happened was his fault, it is Sun's fault leading Nexus to become like this.

"Your apologies don't mean anything to me."

And Nexus sounds so wanting to move one, to get done with his job, to stop talking about the past. It doesn't matter if Sun says sorry or not, because he doesn't care. He doesn't want to care.

And the term he used... Dragging Sun into his lab and plug he into the machine, to let him never do any of his own will ever again....

What does Nexus think Sun will do with his own will? Like what exactly can Sun do? Yapping at his ears until it bleeds? Sun doesn't have any manipulated skills at all, he is so straightforward and honest to actually harm Nexus from behind, like, Nexus just needs to highjack Sun's head like Moon.

From my perspective, I think there are a lot of methods to let Sun do as Nexus plead, but Nexus only wants to stop thinking about Sun. Like if he fully controlled over Sun, he will not have to think about how Sun is disappointed in him anymore, He will not have to think of Sun as a human being, as his ex brother, as someone still cares about him.

And when Sun says he will not do as Nexus says? Nexus sounds didn't surprise at all. They understand each other too well to know even Sun sometimes a coward, he will not give up like that for Nexus.

Also... Why did he not just threaten Moon? Or Dazzle? Or Jack? Just like how he mocks Solar?

Did he not want his older brother to think of him lower?

"...I have you kneel at me, right ? So look at your superior being."

The way Nexus said that, it makes me feel sad. Like, Nexus so wants to cut off Sun, to make Sun think of him as a monster, to hurt Sun not even in the way it matters.

He still couldn't hit Sun at his lowest, I mean, back then, Old Moon even worse with Sun both emotionally and physically back in the days.

Even after so much nonsense craps, Sun still unharmed. He tortured Moon, he mocked Solar, but Sun.... There is no win in this fight.

Their fighting still looks so much more than their so used banter before... I wish Nexus and Sun will be still brothers ;.;

Sidenote: I love that Ruin tries to convince Nexus to think more with his head but just ends up giving up like : oh right, screw you then, asshole.

Very baby girl behaviour of him.

[tinydefector]

This is my first time requesting anything on this app rn pls bear with me 😭😭

Can you write the TFP decepticons (like soundwave, shockwave, megatron, knockout, starscream) reacting to a young reader with a 90s grunge/metal music taste? Like they regularly play it on a CD player and what not and maybe there can even be HCs about what they like in music as well

Grunge Reader

Oki before we get into the Scenarios, here's the list of bots their thoughts on the music, clothing choice and what I think they would listen too.

Word count: 4k

Warnings: non

Request and ask open, read pinned post

Fanfic masterlist

Shockwave masterlist

Soundwave masterlist

Starscream masterlist

Breakdown masterlist

Knockout masterlist

Megatron masterlist

Soundwave: for me Shockwave indulges in your music on many occasions he enjoy things that make you happy and if it's grunge metal he tends to go out of his way to find music downloading it for you, for him clothing or fabric in general is a foreign thing, only higher ups in the council and senate had those privileges, so he he tends to rather enjoy seeing all the different fabrics you wear.

His music choices tend to go one of two ways, Tecnho music or classical music.

Favourites to listen to

- daft punk

- scandroid

- dance with the dead

- Beethoven

- tchaikovsky

Knockout : Knockout adores listing to both you and Breakdown sing along to grunge music it livens up the medical wing and the amount of concerts the happen of the three of you singing together is amazing, he does adore your clothing choice but most times it a lot of the clothing you wear while helping him weld ends up being your band shirts.

His music choice is very pop based but he does enjoy some scandalous metal and rock.

- Lady Gaga

- nine inch nails

- Nickelback

- My Darkest days

- Rihanna

Breakdown: This bot is a grunge and metal fan, has taken you to multiple concerts events and even shopping for stuff. He has a collection of Cds in his glove box for when you both hangout. He is the one who's slowly convinced Knockout to let loose and dance around to the music with you. TM biggest grunge supporter of the ship.

His favourite bands consist of

- Faith no more

- the smashing pumpkins

- limp bizkit

- powderfinger

- Spiderbait

Starscream: he doesn't understand the appeal nor is he a fan of the music but he will still suffer though it with little remark other than a few grumbles over calling it junk music, but deep down he does enjoy it but only I a tiny bit. Starscream is more into piano and organ. He loves different genres but if it has a piano in it he's automatically captivated. It's the old Vos senator coming out.

- Joe Hisaishi

- Elton John

- mozart

- Ludovico Einaudi

- Billy Joel

Megatron: Megatron as much for his snarl and growl over your 'human' music he doesn't really mind, but he won't admit that, he will enjoy listening to the grunge music on occasions softly in the comfort of his own quarters. It's not really to his taste but he does rather enjoy some of the lyrics.

Music taste for Megatron is funny because I see him enjoying things like, for him it's the lyrics more than the music itself but he would never let anyone know this was the type of music he indulges in.

- Kate bush

- The Wombats

- bastille

- of monsters and men

- Hozier

Shockwave: Shockwave is a strange one for he has no real interest in music he's interested in the effects it has on people the way they react to it. But he himself isn't interested in it, so he doesn't really react to your music. He lets you listen to it and he studies you, how you sing, dance and express yourself. (If it was Senator Soundwave it would be a very different case he'd be a kesha Fan and most like enjoy classical music too)

But for TFP shockwave i feel like he would listen to things that are educational and most times it's only until he has memorised it all.

The periodic table song, he has caught himself humming to when he wishes to remember one of the elements he needs.

____________

SOUNDWAVE

loud music blares from one of the observation desks, 'Best of you' by foo fighters can be heard, At the unexpected yet recognizable guitar riff emanating through his communications hub, Soundwave cycles a quiet ventilation as he turns from maintenance duties to move calmly toward the source of noise and nervous glances. Approaching the observation deck, his visor betrays nothing as optics alight upon the human seated amid controls, belting lyrics with unrestrained passion.

His field pulses gentle amusement even as He lowers the volume slightly. Leaning his massive frame close 'til his visor meets bright eyes. His fingers delicately tap rhythm against a polished table beside his assistant as silence finds its way back between songs.

"Awww why'd you turn it down? I was even speed typing!" They whine out.

"Come on Soundwave you enjoy my music don't try to deny it" the smug comment from them is teasing and aimed at him. Soundwave's visor flickers with a trace of amusement, a smile face flickers onto his visor.

" Volume exceeded safety tolerances for sensitive communication arrays. Appreciation for artistic expression acknowledged." The crude mix of recorded voice combined as One massive talon extends to delicately sweep an errant lock of hair from their smiling face. His free servo rests upon the large keyboard, slowly typing another quick report.

"Continuation of duties mandatory."

His thumb traces a tender caress of their cheek as he continues to work, watching over them as he does so.

"Can I please have it up just a little more, it helps me concentrate on work when I can listen to music" they ask while leaning into his touch, small cheek pressed into his servo.

At their request, Soundwave considers briefly through a gentle pulse of his field before dipping his helm in a nod. "Very well. However, monitor levels closely."

He leans close to peers with gentle scrutiny at their work display, enormous frame bending tenderly as if to shelter their focus.

A deep ex-vent whispers across their cheek and hair. They smile up at him, eyes sparkling in a way only organics do.

"Your the best you know that soundwave" it makes the Decepticon feel very smug hearing those words but he doesn't voice it, His Soundwave's visor brightens subtly as his field swells with pulses of unconditional pride. Inclining his helm in a slow nod, trying to get them to focus back on their work.

"Hey Sounds, I know cybertron probably has its own type of music but if you had to pick a favourite earth genre and artist who would it be?" They ask more out of curiosity. At the thoughtful inquiry, Soundwave's optics linger on them from behind the visor. Though alien to his kind, organic cultural forms have proven insightful in the creativity humans possessed.

After several nanokliks. "Energetic melodies and precise instrumentation suggest preferred categories termed 'Classical' and 'techno'. Composers eliciting strongest empathic resonance include Beethoven and daft punk through capacity to convey vast complexity and emotive depth often exceeding standard units of measurement." He states before they both continue work with a few questions passed between the two of them.

Knockout & Breakdown

'Break stuff' by limp bizkit blares through the medical wing, the sound of a welder can be heard along with singing from both Breakout and their Human assistant. "It's just one of those days!" They both sing out while they continue working on fix work. The human assistant continues welding as Breakdown works on checking that the Venicon being worked on was still in induced status.

Knockout raised an audio receptor as the sound blared through the medical bay, his visor flickering with surprise. He turned to see his Conjunx and their human assistant working together, the two of them singing along to the song. A smirk formed on Knockout's faceplate, finding the scene oddly amusing.

As Breakdown checked on the Vehicon, Knockout approached, leaning against a nearby table with his arms crossed. "Well, well, seems like you two are having quite the productive day," he commented, his voice filled with a mix of amusement and curiosity.

Breakdown glanced up from his task, a grin spreading across his faceplate. " Just trying to keep the energy up here," he replied. "You should join us! It's therapeutic, trust me."

Knockout chuckled, his optics flickering with amusement. "Oh, I wouldn't want to deprive you of your precious bonding time with our human," he replied, his tone dripping with playful sarcasm. "But keep up the good work, Breakdown. We've got quite the repair queue today."

He's all fixed up Breakdown" they call to the other bot.

Knockout's optics widened in mock offence at the human's comment, a playful pout forming on his faceplate.

"Seems like you've got quite the team going here, Breakdown," Knockout remarked, a hint of admiration in his voice. "But don't get too comfortable. We've got plenty more repairs to tackle."

The human flicks up their welding visor as they look to the doctor, "awww do you want me to put some Nine inch nails on for you after KO I know you enjoy them and Gaga" they call out which gets a snicker from Breakdown as he helps the human out of the Venicons chestplate.

"NIN, Gaga, and little ol' me? You know just how to make a mech feel special," he replied, his voice dripping with exaggerated charm. "But I must admit, their music does have a certain... appeal."

Breakdown chuckled at the banter, appreciating the light-hearted atmosphere in the medical bay. He moves towards Knockout who wraps his arms around the larger bot.

Knockout, still leaning into his Conjunx.

"No smooching in the Medbay!, save it for later lovebots!" They human yells while flinging a wrench at breakdown and Knockout, the wrench doesn't hurt either of them but Knockout hisses out about his paint. They move to their phone turning the bluetooth volume as 'Paralyzer' begins playing.

Knockout's optics widened in surprise as the wrench flew past him, narrowly missing its target. He instinctively ducked, his servo reaching up to protect his visage. A playful smirk formed on his faceplate as he looked at the human assistant, his voice filled with amusement.

"Watch the Paint!," Knockout shouts looking towards them,He glanced over at Breakdown, sharing a knowing look with his fellow Decepticon. The unexpected interruption only added to the lively atmosphere of the medbay

"Cheeky little scraplet," Knockout declared, his voice adopting a playful tone. And it makes Breakdown laugh, “don't let them catch you calling them that Red they'll have your helm” Breakdown whispers back to his lover.

Knockout and Breakdown resumed their work, the sound of their tools blending with the music. Despite the wrench incident, Knockout found himself appreciating the human's lively spirit and their ability to inject a sense of fun into their daily tasks.

As the songs continued to play, Knockout couldn't resist adding his own flair, busting out some dance-like moves in between repairs, Breakdown even taking a moment to spin him around. With every twist and turn, his frame exuded a confident charm, his vibrant personality shining through.

In that moment, the medbay transformed into a temporary haven of laughter, music, and productivity. The boundaries between Decepticon and human blurred, replaced by a shared enjoyment of the moment. And as they continued to work and dance, Knockout couldn't help but be grateful for the unexpected companionship and the vibrant energy their human assistant brought into their lives.

Starscream

Starscream loathed being put on pick up duties for the Decepticons 'pet' human as he declared them. He taps his claws against the tree trunk with a snarl.

It's another five minutes before they finally show up at the pick up point.

Starscream narrows his optics at the organic's dishevelled appearance. "You are late," he hisses, talons clenching impatiently against the tree bark. "And what is this...costume you've adorned yourself with? Have you been cavorting in primate rituals again?"

Scooping the human gingerly in his palm, Starscream brings them up to optic level for a more thorough scan. His faceplates curl in distaste at the myriad colours and textures now clinging to their garb.

"I care not what strange fashions the earthlings find appealing. But you represent the Decepticons in this rusting backwater. You will present yourself in a proper manner"

His tone holds a biting edge, though he is careful not to squeeze too tightly and damage his unwilling charge.

Setting the human down once more, he transforms in a whirr of joints, air brakes hissing. "Now Get in. I've wasted enough time already fetching you." His engines rev impatiently, prayer wings arched in a silent threat. Time to return to the Nemesis.

"Stars, I told you I had a concert tonight!, don't talk shit about my fit!" They state while flipping him off. They move to climb into the pilot seat, still humming along to some of the songs.

Starscream's optics narrow dangerously at the human's insolent gesture. "Watch your fleshy appendage, worm, before I remove it," he hisses. Nonetheless, he waits impatiently for the organic to strap into the seat before closing his cockpit windshield. As his flight engines roar to life, Starscream vents a derisive snort.

"A concert, you say? Bah. What pompous cacophony of noise making as 'music' among you humans?" Lifting off and banking sharply into the darkening sky, Starscream runs stealth diagnostics with his free systems. The organic's attire had indeed been outrageous, unbefitting one under Decepticon protection. Still, information is information.

"Now, out with it.?" His turbines whine expectantly, They let out a laugh. "Oh and I thought you weren't interested in the primitiveness of human society, you wanna hear about the music, drugs or amount of people who got hurt in the most pit?" They leaning back into his seat.

"Music, drugs, and injuries, you say? Now you have piqued my interest, fleshling. While your species' rituals hold little tactical value, So out with it, then - what lurid tales do you have to tell?" The two chat between themselves before Starscream asked his next question.

"What strange sounds passed for music among the masses? I assume it involved heavy percussion and vulgar vocals."

"It really depends on your taste Starscream, I happen to enjoy 90s Grunge, metal." They reply while pulling up 'Cannonball' by the breeders as an example. Starscream isn't impressed by it.

"Did cybertron have music? What did you enjoy listening too?"

Starscream considers the noisy music playing in his cockpit, wings twitching in distaste. "Your earthly 'grunge' leaves much to be desired in terms of musical structure and composition," he sniffs. "Though I will concede it matches the primitive aesthetic of your species."

At the human's question, Starscream's optics take on a distant gleam as he delves into memory files. "Cybertron was home to a rich culture and history before the wars consumed all. In the arena before battle, great artists would compose symphonies to inspire our skills and stir our sparks. Legendary musicians like Ironwing wrote anthems that could lift one's spirit even in the depths of the Pits."

His turbines sigh wistfully. "As for my own tastes...there was something majestic about listening to Polyhex Quartet in the archives of the Elite Guard. The way their harmonies echoed through the stacks, remnants of a Golden Age long fallen...it was easy to lose track of time, imagining nobler days."

Banking closer to the Nemesis, Starscream gazes toward the ship looking for his landing platform. "But that was vorns ago."

They hum as they lean forward resting their chin in their hands. "Any kinda human music you do like?" They ask, it was the most starscream had really talked with them, he seemed to enjoy it when people were open to listen.

Starscream considers the human's question, After several nano-klicks of thoughtful silence, he rumbles, "While most of your species' artistic offerings leave much to be desired, I did find some merit in the instrumental compositions of a 'Ludovico Einaudi.' His piano works featured a pleasant minimalism and emotional resonance that reminded me a bit of Polyhex Quartet's melodies from vorns past." As the seeker comes in for landing they quickly finish their conversation before Starscream begins walking off leaving them on the landing pad. “Come on then!” He calls out

Megatron

'Ever flow' by pearl Jam echo's through the Nemesis, and Megatron knows full well who was responsible for the music, his human companion, they had somehow convinced Soundwave to let them play music through the ship. As he approaches the command deck he can see the human sitting on the armrest of his throne-like seat. They look up at Megatron with a smile on their face.

Megatron loomed over the human sitting on his command throne, his optics flickering in irritation beneath his battlemask. "Explain yourself, fleshling," he rumbled. "Why have you taken liberties with my ship? The Nemesis operates according to my will alone." However, beneath his stern facade, Megatron felt a grudging admiration for the human's boldness. Few dared such freedoms amongst the Decepticons.

.

"It's really too quiet in here sir, I thought some music might help with work progress'' they state smugly knowing full well Megatron wouldn't do anything about it, he enjoyed their company too much. As the song continues to play his optics roam the ship taking in how all the Decepticons seem to be working quickly.

Megatron's optics narrowed at the human's insolent reply, but inwardly he conceded the point. A droning silence could sap even the most industrious of mecha. And perhaps this...experiment with music had merits he had not considered. His gaze swept the command deck, noting with grudging approval how the Decepticons laboured at peak efficiency under the strange sounds echoing through the Nemesis.

"You show promise, fleshling," rumbled Megatron. They nearly gasp as Megatron picks them up, holding them to his chassis as he walks out of the command deck with them in toe. They look up at him slightly worried. "Megatron I can change it if you like, I just thought Pearl Jam would be a decent band not too heavy or distracting" they state softly.

Megatron chuckled darkly as the human gazed up at him with concern, still clasped gently in his massive claw. " For now I have no complaints." He strode from the command deck, the human neatly tucked against his chestplate.

The next song that plays is 'monkeys gone to heaven' - by Pixies it's alot softer than the first song and Megatron finds he doesn't quite mind it, it's not the type of music he listened to on Cybertron but it was tolerable.

"Sir, did Cybertron have music?" They ask softly as he places them down on his desk of his hub suite.

Megatron felt his tension lessen ever so slightly as the softer music drifted through his audials. Not the proud martial hymns of Cybertron's past, but... tolerable from this alien creature. He lowered the human gently to his desk, regarding them thoughtfully as the question prompted memories of ages past.

"Indeed, Cybertron had its share of musical compositions," he rumbled. "Grand orchestral." His optics dimmed as he recalled theatre houses echoing with stirring choruses of advancement and glory. How far his once-great planet had fallen since those golden epochs.

"What did you like listening to?, my music taste isn't to everyone's liking but I'm intrigued. What did the great Decepticon leader listen to before he was a leader?" They ask while sitting down watching as he flicks through reports.

Megatron hesitated at the question, taken aback by their audacity. None dared inquire so freely into his past.

"Before the uprising, in Cybertron's golden age, my tastes ran to Cycles of Triumph, music that stirred the spark," he rumbled after a moment. "I was a gladiator then, and such works I found peaceful."

A clawed finger tapped thoughtfully on the arm of his throne. "Your music lacks such scope and poetic pull." His fiery optics regarded the human keenly.

"Is there anything you have listened to of earth music you happen to like?"

"There was one tune - 'Running Up That Hill', I believe the humans call it. Sung by a femme named Kate Bush. An...oddly compelling work."

His optics flickered as another memory surfaced. "And 'Greek Tragedy' by the Wombats - an enjoyable song about the fleeting nature of your species. The instrumentation was pleasing, and the lyrics reminded me of Cybertron's golden ages now lost, days I do sometimes miss."

Megatron fixed the human with a stern gaze. "But speak of this to no one. Your music has proven of some use, small creature, so I permit its continued playing for now. "

Shockwave

Shockwaves optic watches the human walk around the desk, headphones in as they dance to their music, they weren't even away when he was there, as they sing along to their music.

Shockwave observes the human with detached curiosity, analysing their behaviour and attempting to understand the appeal of their actions. The rhythmic movements and the joy displayed on their faces seem foreign to him, as he had never experienced such emotions himself. He analyses the human's clothing, noting the 90s grunge aesthetic and its significance in human culture.

As the human continues to dance and sing, Shockwave's attention is drawn to their carefree nature. It contrasts sharply with his own isolated existence and the weight of his scientific pursuits. He finds himself captivated by their uninhibited display of emotion, something he had only observed from a distance.

Curiosity piqued, Shockwave decides to engage with the human, partly out of a scientific interest in their behaviour and partly out of an unexplainable longing for connection. He approaches cautiously, his footsteps silent, as he stands by the edge of the desk. With a cold monotone, he interrupts their dancing.

"Human, your behaviour is perplexing to me. Explain the purpose of your actions and the emotions they elicit."

They let out a noise of surprise as they quickly remove their headphones. "shockwave!, sorry i didn't know you were back" they state sheepishly.

Shockwave's optic narrows as he observes the human's reaction, noting their surprise and subsequent apology. He remains silent for a brief moment, processing their response before speaking.

"There is no need for apologies. Your unawareness of my presence is inconsequential," Shockwave replies, his voice devoid of any warmth or understanding. "Now, answer my previous inquiry. Explain the purpose of your actions and the emotions they elicit."

The human shifts uncomfortably, their expression changing from surprise to slight unease. They hesitate for a moment before replying, "I... I was just listening to music and dancing. It's a way for me to express myself, to feel free and happy."

Shockwave processes their response, analysing the concept of expressing oneself through music and movement. He finds it intriguing, yet foreign, yet past memories linger for a life that was but a past memory. The emotions they mention, happiness and freedom, are unfamiliar to him these days, but he can sense a certain appeal in their description.

"Freedom and happiness," Shockwave muses, his monotone voice betraying a hint of curiosity. "These emotions are foreign to me. What purpose do they have?”

The human looks at Shockwave with a mix of surprise and sympathy. "Well, Shockwave, emotions are a complex part of being human, humans feel a lot and well music seems to ignite that in us."

Shockwave's single optic flickers as he processes the human's words, contemplating the idea of experiencing emotions. He remains silent for a while, lost in thought, before finally speaking, his voice tinged with a hint of uncertainty.

"I appreciate your perspective. It is a concept I will consider further. Thank you for enlightening me."

The human smiles warmly, offering a kind gesture. "Anytime, Shockwave."

Shockwave nods, his optic fixed on the human.

With that, Shockwave turns to walk away, his mind filled with newfound curiosity and lingering sensations under his plating. The encounter with the human has sparked something within him.

"Wait Shockwave" they call out trying to get his attention before the bot left to continue more studies.

Shockwave pauses in his tracks, turning his attention back to the human who called out to him. His optic narrows slightly, displaying a hint of curiosity as he regards them.

"What is it?" he asks, his monotone voice betraying no emotion. "Is there something else you require?"

"Do you listen to music?" They asked. They wanted to know if he did and if so what kind of music he enjoyed.

Shockwave's optic flickers briefly as he ponders the question. The concept of music as a form of entertainment is something he had observed but never actively engaged with himself. However, in his quest for knowledge, he had gathered data on various forms of human expression, including music.

"I do not listen to music, it has no benefits to my work," Shockwave replies, his voice devoid of any enthusiasm. "However, I have analysed and studied different genres of music as part of my research on human culture. It is an intriguing form of artistic expression. But have not ever listened for pleasure"

The human's face lights up with curiosity, their eyes shining with excitement. "I could play some music for you?, you might get an understanding of why humans like it so much” Shockwave hesitates for a moment, processing the human's offer. The idea of experiencing human music firsthand intrigues him. He nods, his optic narrowing slightly in response.

"Very well," Shockwave replies, his voice remaining monotone. "I am open to experiencing music in order to gain a deeper understanding of its appeal to humans. Please proceed."

The human grins and quickly moves to a nearby control panel, fiddling with buttons and switches until ‘head like a Hole’ begins to fill the room. The music flows through the speakers, enveloping the space with its riffs and rhythms.

As the music plays, Shockwave stands still, his optic focused on the source of the sound. He analyses the intricate patterns, the interplay of different instruments, and the emotions that the music is designed to evoke. And a memory flashes across his processor. His green and white features in a mirror as he sings along to music in his Laboratory, he had just been at a council session, Proteus had irritated him extremely and music helped him settle after the session. It's a fleeting memory of another life.

After a few moments, the human glances at Shockwave, their eyes searching for any signs of reaction. "What do you think, Shockwave?"

Shockwave pauses, his optic brightening for a brief moment before returning to its usual intensity. "Strange…" he states. He'd have to do more research into this.

[a-998h]

I’m so sorry if I’m like bothering you😭 But like I just have so many questions-

So what if in the same scenario where (Reader) is like really strong and kills monsters like the ask from before

And once they find out that some of the Archons/other people are really old they’ll make soo many jokes about it-

Like if Zhongli was like “Please (Reader), I don’t mind if you see me as a father-figure, I won’t be mad if you call me Dad,”

And (Reader) who’s like 12-14 years old is like “You’re too old to be my Dad, you’re more like a grandpa.” And then they just walk away, and Zhongli just lays on the floor, heartbroken

And if (Reader) beefs with Wanderer, and he’s being mean they’ll be like “Shut up old man!” Or like “Your still this immature at your grown age?”

And for Nahida, they would just hold her in their arms, she would be the only few people that (Reader) doesn’t actively make fun of, and they’ll show genuine interest on how she’s so old but looks so young, and they would like sit with her and talk about their world

But suddenly everything takes a turn when (Reader) is sitting with a character (One who’s thousands of years old) and (Reader) just turns to them and’s like “Y’know, I realized if I stay in this world, that means you and a lot of the others are still gonna be here when I die” and then they’ll just calmly turn back to look up back at the starry night-

You pick which ones would be bawling their eyes out or how each character would react-

And then reader would go up to characters who aren’t thousands of years old and would assume they are and they would be like “You look old” or like “I feel like your actually an old person”

Like they would say this to Itto, Cyno, Diluc or any other characters of your choosing (Hopefully those three aren’t thousands of years old from what I know💀)

Have a good day!

-🍉Anon

🍉 Anon you never fail to inspire me and my devious little mind, and for that I thank you. I'll start with the mocking age headcanons then move into the existential dread the Creator inspires.

(Included characters: Venti, Zhongli, Ei, Nahida, Itto, Wander, Diluc, Cyno, Xiao, Neuvillette, and Xianyun)

Age jokes

Zhongli

“Please (Reader), I don’t mind if you see me as a father-figure, I won’t be mad if you call me Dad,”

“You’re too old to be my Dad, you’re more like a grandpa.”

Your response/ jab at his age makes him pause

At this point no one in Teyvat besides Traveler and Paimon know that Zhongli is Rex Lapis

Is not surprised the great Creator knows things, but he wasn't expecting you to know that

Uses the jokes to mess with you in small ways

Whenever you ask to do any monster killing he'll pull the deaf old man bit, just to annoy you

Will also make you do harder chores by pulling the old man = bad back

It's funny... to him, he also uses this as a teaching moment

Venti

Laughs it off

Another that uses your jokes to mess with you

When you ask him to do something, he'll hold his hand to his ear and say "I'm sorry little windblume, I didn't hear you. My hearing must be going at this age,"

But jokes on him, you use his perceived old age to try and limit his wine drinking

That fails, but you tried kid

Whenever you run around Mondstadt or do monster killing, he sighs and talks about when he was young

You both annoy each other and it is glorious

Ei

She is shocked

She knew you liked to joke, but she didn't think she was that old

Because you're talking to the Riaden Shogun puppet most of the time, you don't get a reaction

Your jokes don't get turned on you

It's kind of boring

Nahida

Only one who doesn't get age jokes

You are genuinely curious about how she looks young but is really hundreds of years old

You both talk about the advantages and disadvantages of being physically young but mentally older

Still unnerved by your monster killing and has her friend Wanderer watch over you

Furina

Huffs of annoyance

she then scolds you herself before snitching on you to Neuvillette

In the ends she'll forgive you, once you bribe her with sweets

Wanderer

“Shut up old man!”

How dare you!

His face turns shades of red no one knew were possible

Will respond by calling you brat and saying how cute you are in a teasing tone

Will be petty

“Your still this immature at your grown age?”

Turns even redder

You both beef with each other and it makes other worried

Will granny pinch your cheeks

Still smug about your monster killing, if bribed he'll help you

Your beef is both worrying and entertaining

Xiao

Silence

He doesn't really understand the ages jokes

Thinks that you're just being mean

He'll snitch to grandpa Zhongli

Once it's explained to him by Zhongli

He just is confused

Why are you joking that he's old?

Just a really clueless when it comes to these jokes

Itto

Tears

He thinks it's because his hair is white

Now, he'll try his best to be the cool young uncle to you

He also doesn't want to think about how old he is

Will try and go monster killing with you

When he sees your strength... proud

Will carry you around and be like "Look at my awesome friend!"

So yeah, like a grandma showing off pictures of her grandkids

Cyno

Is surprised

It's probably his grumpy face and his voice

Whenever you make ages jokes he tries to scold you about it

Whenever you run into the desert to do monster killing he'll chase after you to stop you

Try and pull this in the rainforest and he'll have Tighnari case you do to stop you

He thinks you make jokes about his age because of his hair color

Proud of your strength but still worrys about you

Diluc

This is the face he has on the inside

His voice and resting bitch face is probably what makes you think he's old, at least he thinks so

Think Kaeya is the one who is telling you he's old

He canonically 22 so this hits him hard

Tries to keep you in the manor at night

When he sees you sneaking out to kill monsters.... dad mode ™️

The more he scolds, and tries to act like a dad the more you call him old

You'll be the reason he ends up with grey hair, eyes bag, and wrinkles

Neuvillette

Grandpa number 2

He already deals with Furina, so he's prepared

Whenever you poke fun at his age, he'll scold you for it

He'll never say it in public but you and Furina are his grandbabies

Your monster killing worries him, like a lot

So much that he has the melusine spy on you and report back

You often get scolded for reckless behavior

He is the more strict of your grandfather figures

Glares and scolds you whenever you call him old

He thinks your jokes are very disrespectful

Would be upset if they started rubbing off on Furina

Xianyun

Considering she tells Paimon to "respect your elders" when Paimon made her mad

She doesn't really care

To her, age = experience

She will act unaffordable by you monster killing, but it scares her

When you joke about her being a grandma, she plays into it

It's not to annoy you either, she just thinks she's your grandma

Will do standard grandma things

Whenever you try and get her to stop, she just responds with "nonsense!"

Now time for existential dread

“Y’know, I realized if I stay in this world, that means you and a lot of the others are still gonna be here when I die”

Crying on the outside and the inside

Nahida, Itto, Venti, Furina

Cries on the inside only

Neuvillette, Zhongli, Diluc, Ei

Doesn't know how to properly talk to you abut it

Cyno, Xiao, Wanderer, Xianyun

[privatehousesanatomy]

House x Reader

Reader forces House to go with his Team (you decide which combo) and Wilson to an amusement park. And with Reader of course.

House only agrees because he secretly has a thing for Reader.

_________

I just think this could be very funny. LMAO :D

this is literally such a cute little idea i love it! hopefully this does it justice!

GREGORY HOUSE X READER

🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

Amusement parks weren't typically disability friendly as there weren't many rides that would accommodate people with mobility aids. The mere idea of going to an amusement park sounded dreadful to House.

"Oh, come on, House. It'll be fun. We've all got tickets for this weekend," you urged. Cameron, Chase, Foreman and Wilson were all going as well.

"Do you honestly think I want to spend hours walking around in the hot sun just to watch everyone else go on rides?" he scoffed, shaking his head.

"It'd be good for you to get out for once. How many more Saturdays can you spend alone on your couch with a porno magazine?" you joked.

"That's not fair. I'm too old and crippled for amusement parks," House frowned.

"Just come with us. You'll have fun, I promise," you begged. "Besides, I think there's supposed to be a monster truck jam in the evening."

The prospect of watching monster trucks live piqued his interest, and as much as he wanted to decline, he knew he couldn't. Plus, it would be a day he would get to spend with you, but he'd never admit that he had a thing for you.

"Fine. But I'm only going for the monster trucks. And you'd better pay for all of my food, too," he huffed, and you simply nodded and smiled.

When Saturday rolled around, House climbed out of the car when the crew pulled up to the amusement park. It's been years since he'd last been to one, and even then he couldn't remember the last time he'd even been to one.

"You guys really expect me to walk around in this heat? I'm going to collapse before we even get through the gates," he scoffed sarcastically, grabbing his cane from the trunk of the car.

"We'll get you one of those scooters," you teased.

"Right, like that won't make me look like an old geezer," House rolled his eyes, though he wasn't completely opposed to the scooter. In fact, he fully planned to rent one.

As they all made it through the gates, the first thing House did was rent one of the scooters, and he sighed in relief when he sat on the seat.

"See? Now you won't complain as much," you teased, and House smirked a little.

"Bold of you to assume I won't find something to complain about today. Or many somethings."

"I wouldn't expect anything less from you."

The day went surprisingly better than House expected it to. He didn't dare get on any of the rides, and no one bothered to pressure him into getting on any rides, either. But the heat was relentless, and House was beginning to get slightly restless.

"You really had to pick the hottest day of the year, didn't you?" he grumbled as he drove the scooter under a shaded area, breathing a sigh of relief when he felt a slight cool breeze.

"It's the only weekend for the next month that wasn't calling for rain," you shrugged, sitting down on the bench beside his scooter. Everyone else was either on a ride or exploring different parts of the park, but you'd stuck with House and Wilson for most of the day.

"Yeah, well, next time you come here, don't bother inviting me. I'll stick to my porno magazines," he joked, grabbing the bottle of water from the cupholder and taking a large drink.

"Oh, come on. You've gotta be having some fun, right?"

"There's nothing fun about being a cripple in an amusement park, Y/N. I'm only here because you wanted me here," he said, and you felt your eyes widen slightly.

"I thought you were only here for the monster trucks?"

"Yeah, right. The monster trucks...That's what I meant," he said, trying to recover himself, but he knew that it was too late.

"You're really here because of me?" you asked. House knew there was no point in trying to argue, so he nodded.

"You were right...I can't keep spending my Saturday's alone," he admitted, looking away for a second. He might have put on the facade that he liked being alone, but in reality, being alone was, well...lonely.

"Well, for what it's worth, I'm glad you agreed to come out today. Next time we'll do something that's a little more your speed."

"Do we have to invite the team? Or Wilson?" he asked, causing you to raise your eyebrows.

"Just the two of us? Like a date?" you asked. House wanted to say no, but deep down, he knew he'd be lying.

"Yeah...I guess like a date," he mumbled. He wasn't good at this whole thing, and he was left feeling pretty awkward.

"I'd like that," you say, much to House's surprise.

"Really?"

"Yes, really. Why do you think I was so insistent on you coming with us today? It was an excuse for me to spend time with you," you said. It all made sense now, and House couldn't believe that he'd missed those clues.

"And so you picked dragging me to an amusement park?"

"I figured the monster trucks would interest you," you shrugged, causing him to smirk a little.

"Well, you were right about that," he replied. At this point, everyone was walking over to where they were sitting, ultimately interrupting the moment.

"The sun's setting. We should probably head over to the arena before the show starts," Wilson said, which everyone promptly agreed to. House glanced over at you and patted the seat on his scooter. You climbed on behind him.

"How come she gets a ride and none of us do?" Cameron asked, and House looked up at her.

"Because she paid for the damn thing," House rolled his eyes, though you knew the real reason why. And with that, House started up the scooter and began driving behind his colleagues as they headed for the arena.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #22

Best of Wish

I enjoy Irep's grit-teethed remark when he mentions Anti-Fairies can't have godkids. He's just like his dad, for real, for real.

If he's this annoyed at the thought of Anti-Fairies not being allowed godkids, that kinda implies he wants one, which is interesting. Godkids were always one of Anti-Cosmo's interests, but never something Foop pursued on purpose or ever expressed interest in.

Please enjoy this cut Anti-Cosmo dialogue from an early script for "Fairly Oddlympics" that I think about constantly:

btw, there are a lot of funny deleted scenes in the old scripts that I love talking about, especially from this one, so if you find anything that catches your eye and post about it, you should @ me because I would enjoy reading your reactions <3

Plot twist - Irep is doing healthy things to work through his "scary godparent for Vicky" trauma while Peri's reaction to Vicky trauma was to cover his ears, hide behind his mom, and sing "La la la, la la la" to pretend she wasn't there.

Peri said his memories of childhood are blurry. I wonder if Irep remembers his childhood better since he was fully able to talk and comprehend things back then.

"Once a fairy quits, any magical being can take their place!"

I mean... Technically yes, but you used to have to sing for it. lol.

The Pixies, who are literally last in line for godkids below all other magical beings (including pegasi, bigfeet, and lake monsters), watching Irep stroll in like: ???

- which imo was implied to be a punishment for their race after H.P. was godparent to some unconfirmed kid I've been headcanoning was Dale for 7 years-

Actually, I like the implication that Irep was so fast to snipe Dev because he's been stalking them since he found out Peri was assigned a godkid.

Irep: Once a fairy quits, any magical being can take their place! Wanda: Peri didn't quit! He was waiting for you to call! Cosmo: He thought you two were on a break! Me: ... ?????? Peri was waiting for Irep to call and take him back? Run that by me again??

... I legitimately cannot tell if they're addressing Dev or Irep. Irep was the last person to speak, but Dev speaks next. Rewinding and listening to the conversation again, I can use my context clues to see they're probably looking at Dev (who is offscreen), but ?? why would you frame it that ambiguously.

Did anyone else get confused here or was that just me?

Also this has done nothing to disprove my previous "Peri is clingy especially where break-ups are concerned" interpretation.

I like how the very first wish Dev makes in this scene isn't for his dad to love him, but for Bev to love him.

How many kids in this class have names that rhyme with Dev and why is he so determined to befriend them all?

?? Okay, so I was previously confused about Dev's friendships because I was pretty sure I remembered him saying in Episode 1 that he and Trev were friends, but we haven't seen them interact at all. I went back and checked, and here's what he says:

"That's Trev! He's my bud, so he probably won't give YOU the time of day."

I wish we got to see him hanging out with Trev. Did they split after Trev didn't come to his sleepover?

- I just checked; I don't see any evidence of Trev at Hazel's. - Hey, did Winn and Jasmine ever find out Hazel lied to them about living in a 5-star hotel? - In conclusion, we are being ROBBED of the Trev-Dev-Bev friend squad.

Looking back, it's very funny that Dev made an effort to introduce Hazel to people when she was the new kid despite that not being his job... including giving some glowing reviews of a few of their classmates, including "This guy's my bud, this person's cool, and I respect this other guy." He wants to talk...

Also, moon is full in New York.

I keep waiting for Irep's music to drop again, but it never does in this scene. It's stressing me out; why did it only drop in THAT scene?

The version I'm watching unfortunately doesn't include credits and I can't find it after a few quick searches, but if Guy Moon did the music for this episode and remembered how he used to do it for Foop and his alt personality when they would do their switch cues 14 years ago, and so when he saw that body language he did it again, I'm gonna lose it.

Surely not... But he had to do it for at least 3 seasons; maybe it just stuck??

I don't see him credited for A New Wish at all on his own IMBD or Wiki page either. idk who did this episode, but I liked it. Hi, I'm the target audience; it's me.

And Irep's still a leftie! Even after putting both hands on the mace handle to smash it down, it goes back to his left when he takes one hand off.

He even does the "sword fight" with his left hand. It's the boy!!!

?? Is Irep's hair both blue (like both his parents') AND black (the color his tuft was in the OG series)?

Are his roots black, but the color eases to dark blue the farther out it grows? That's fantastic!

I like how Peri's hair looks most like his mom's but with a faint slope implying his dad's influence is there, and Irep's hair best parallels his dad's, but he gets his curl from his mom.

Huh. Looks like we've retired the 5 magic colors and now we're just pink poofs and dark blue lightning. Which I'm okay with; I just wasn't paying attention until now. But I know lightning-shaped Anti-Fairy magic was canon in "School of Crock," maybe others.

This does deprive me of my usual 2nd-watch shtick of reading moods based on color. Alas.

I enjoy Hazel rescuing the news reporter, but letting her know that she's a big fan of her work.

Okay, Irep uses his right hand at the last second, but I consider this a win.

I went back and checked frame by frame because I'm a NERD, and funnily enough... It looks like he changes hands after Cosmo blasts him in the left arm. It's hard to tell with the poof cloud, but when you consider the direction he moved (buffeted backwards), that implies it was a left-side hit. It's probably just coincidence, but that's funny.

I like Dev's silly star shades during this scene:

Peri's back!! Old buddies, ol' counterpart pals... I love that teeny-tiny movement Peri makes with his fingers to symbolize air quotes around "quit."

"I never gave two weeks notice~!!"

Also, this definitely belongs in my collection of counterparts using the same body language for opposite moods. idk if we'll see more of that, but it excites me that my stash grows!

I like Peri patting Dev on the head.

"He's still my godkid! :)"

Ooh, snap. Local cousins (once removed) are here to lay down Da Rules, as von Strangles do.

Aw, I like how undoing Dev's cheating means Hazel ends up with the prize shirt. I guess that makes sense; it just wouldn't have been my first thought.

I'm glad adult Irep makes squeaky sounds when you squeeze him. I seem to remember OG Poof making squeaky sounds when he bounced off walls.

Aw, Peri having a happy hug with his parents again! Instead of him feeling like they're overbearing. That's great.

Peri once again proving he's a jealous, clingy ex. I don't think this kid was okay when he was pried away from Timmy and I don't think he took his parents' leaving him on his own for 10k years very well.

I really enjoy Peri's body language throughout this series. All his little twitches and arm rubs and flicking eyes... It says a million words. You could talk forever about him.

I enjoy Dev and Hazel a lot this series, but I think Peri's my favorite. With all his little anxieties and moments he avoids eye contact, you really get the sense that he's working through a lot of baggage.

I like how his instinct was to be honest with his parents and then he immediately regrets it and closes off his body language, avoiding eye contact. He retracts what he said and says something else that he thinks makes him look better. He's got a lot going on.

The fact that he makes this big, decisive head nod as he changes his story to claim he wasn't "jealously spying on Dev" after quitting as his godparent, but he was instead "very normally and confidently passing by" is fantastic. That's... not how people talk in normal conversation, Peri. But I'm glad you're telling me you struggle with confidence issues.

- I think everything I've seen of you supports that. You've been the biggest anxiety ball ever since you got here. - Peri is the guy who'd be on edge wondering if he did something to make everyone mad.

It took me forever to get the above screenshots so I had to keep rewinding, and I have to say... I'm obsessed with that itty-bitty head tilt he does to the left before he goes full right. Idk why it's there, but I like it. It's like a shrug, or like he's thinking through his lie? I enjoy.

Also that teeny-tiny head squirm when he's enjoying the hug with his parents. He's so cute.

Okay, that's pretty messed-up of Peri to laugh with his parents while Dev is in the background really upset. Like, Peri is literally talking about Dev behind his back

-> I wish they'd snuck hints of purple in the background to indicate Peri was there, like a milk carton or pencil or something.

-> I stand by everything I've previously said about Peri not being emotionally mature enough to godparent. His kid needs comfort after a tough experience! Dev just got snapped at and punished by authority and now he's sitting on the ground looking dejected, and Peri's over there giggling!

-> C'mon, man! Hazel clocked on and she's trying to do your job for you. She shouldn't have to do that! (Though it's nice of her to try comforting her friend).

Oop, Dev just yelled at Hazel (again) and Peri did not discourage or discipline him in any way, and tbh... I don't think he even noticed. Because he was laughing and talking about his godkid with his parents. Dude, get your crown in the game.

I love Hazel throwing her prize shirt in Dev's face and shouting that she "hopes it was worth it" <3

I still don't know how to spell O-pairs and at this point, I'm too afraid to ask.

omg, Dev wants to learn about Anti-Fairies. Are we going to get lore and culture? Drama...

PERI, your godkid's running away!! Oh no, he can't hear us... he's got anxiety...

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

on the topic of disability, sometimes when Im talking to other disabled people about disability rights and so on, I get this dreadful feeling that's like 'oh, they really do not know how bad it is, huh'. It's one thing to struggle for access to proper diagnosis and medical aid when you *are able to self advocate*, but as soon as some of you come across a person who cannot self advocate, you stop understanding.

my brother has autism, like me. he has ADHD, like me. he cannot write, cannot speak (he is not mute, but he cannot put words together), and needs care 24/7 from experts.

I have had conversations with other disabled people who have called my parents monsters for 'sending him off to be the government's problem' (in reality, he lives in a shared care house with 24 hour professional care, and my parents visit him weekly).

I have had conversations with other disabled people who were shocked that abuse happened at his past care home, and asked 'why don't you just live with him at home?' somehow ignoring the fact that he is a 6 foot tall, physically imposing 25 year old with very few ways to communicate that he is upset beyond physically lashing out.

I have had other disabled people come to me, confused, when I have described how yes, my brother physically attacked me when we were children and gave my parents lasting injuries, but I have never blamed him because he never had another way to express himself, he was on a cocktail of drugs, and he does not have the social reasoning skills to do something like that out of malice. I have had people tell me I am in denial for this truth, and I'm sure some of you will try to tell me the same.

when I talk about disability activism, I don't just mean wheelchair-accessible spaces, better treatment from doctors, and cheaper, easier healthcare. I mean more care facilities funded by the government. I mean more training for staff working with people who have complex disabilities. I mean advocacy and care for people who cannot, and will never, be able to write a plea for help, or voice their opinions in parliament, or ask to go to the toilet.

my brother is one of my favourite people. he has a personality - likes and dislikes, funny expressions and quirks, a silly smile whenever he's up to no good - he understands certain things, but we will never truly know what exactly he can and cant comprehend. he deserves someone on his side. he deserves the same advocacy other disabled people get from our allies.

if you stop caring about disabled people as soon as they stop being a 'full' person in your eyes, you do not care about disabled people.

[ajbullet]

My thoughts on episode 4 of PJO: spoilers (chaotic edition because I JUST watched it and the thoughts are so fresh)

-First off: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

-Ok, good. Had to get that out. Second: best 30 minutes of my life

-I don’t think you guys will ever be able to fully comprehend how much I love Annabeth Chase and seeing Leah as her has only heightened that love. So imagine how elated I was to watch an episode full of my girl. She slayed, owned, and ate this episode. Whatever you want to call it. She did it

-“Are you awake?” The long-ass pause before Annabeth answered. As soon as Percy spoke, I was so hoping he was talking to her and not Grover (sorry I love him but). And then she answered

-She finally opened up to him!! We got some of her backstory!! She’s finally feeling comfortable!!!

-Percy’s face when she said she was seven. He was so surprised. I think he realized instantly how long this girl has been going through so much. They are only twelves years old. But she was a child when this began for her. Like you could tell he couldn’t believe it

-Grover mocking Annabeth was probably my favorite line from him yet. He’s so unserious I love him. Also, the food part was too relatable

-Small detail but the sky was so freaking pretty in the background. Such a unique thing to add and I loved it

-“Can I ask a dumb question?” As soon as he said it I knew Annabeth was gonna be the one to respond and she did not disappoint.

-“little girl” Annabeth’s reaction. I got chills. Leah deserves an Oscar/Emmy (whatever the actor award is) for that scene alone

-Loved Enchilada (don’t know how to spell her name and don’t feel like going back to check) but she talked too damn much. I was like get back to my kids please. Oh and back the hell up

-My BOY GOT STABBED NOOOOO. Oh he’s fine (plot twist: no he’s not)

-Annabeth took that mf DOWN for a second

-The monument!!! It was so cool!! Interesting that it’s a monument to Athena. I think I remember that from the book but either way that’s cool

-The. Entire. Conversation. Between. Percy. And. Annabeth. Oh. My. Gods.

-The fake accent??? Where did that come from?? I had to rewind twice just to make sure I heard right. Like what in Percy’s mind told him to do that? What wires crossed or came undone? How far had that poison reached? Because that was so unserious and I fell even more in love with his character

-He likeeeeeeeeeeees her

-Annabeth’s smile!! I’ve been waiting to see her smile like that and it was so cool to see! My girl is finally happy! for a second

-“You’ve done more for me in the past two days…” “If I had to pick someone, I’d…”

That required my BRAIN

-Plot twist: (again) Percy is not fine

-The splashing water was so funny. Like I get why but come on that was something else.

-Percy seeing what Annabeth has already sacrificed for him and his quest: her relationship with her mother. He sees what he has already cost her and what helping him means to her and omg it was heartbreaking

-One thing I absolutely adore about the books is that Annabeth’s intelligence is never in doubt by the reader. It’s not Percy or other characters saying she’s smart again and again with no proof. It’s not the narrative shoving the fact that she is smart in your face over and over. She proves she is smart. She proves she is inventive and strategic and intelligent by her actions and thought process and it’s almost never mentioned verbally. That whole idea of show vs tell? It’s perfectly shown through Annabeth acting intelligent instead of people talking about how intelligent she is.

Like how she splashed Percy with water or pulled the fire alarm. The viewers are shown she is smart, not just told.

-Annabeth’s willingness to sacrifice herself for her friends. Her only caring about Percy being poisoned, bot the monsters, and helping him. She knew she would die going up against the Chimera, even calls it the “demigod killer”, yet she does it anyway so her friends can succeed. She opened up to these boys and now she was giving her life for them

-Percy doing the same. Exact. Thing. The trick with the sword. The whispered words against the door, even as they shouted at him to open it. He knew for sure he would die and wanted it to be for a good cause. He didn’t even know if he could fight the chimera, but it was better him than Annabeth

-That boy looked so sick someone please help him

-oh, someone did.

-Dude I told my dad about the whole “Rick not knowing the River wasn’t right under the arc” thing and I was so excited to see how they did that and honestly it worked. Poseidon’s first way of helping Percy was by pulling him into the water, showing him to “just breathe”. My dad laughed when we watched it.

-oh I forgot! I love the first scene with Sally. Had some ptsd from swimming lessons but got to see young Percy so it was worth it

-Also the fall was shot so cool. I felt like I was falling with him

-He can breathe underwater! We knew this! But it’s still awesome!

I can’t even wrap my head around next episode. We are going to be fed so well after this short-ass episode and I am so ready. This episode already gave more Percabeth than I was expecting all season and I wanted to cry it was so adorable. This show is the only thing getting me through each week.

(Also, if you couldn’t tell, I finally figured out how to do italics instead of just capitalizing everything. Go me!)