#otherwise just ignore me

[spoopyloonerisms]

@aromantic-goldfishdeactivated202 please do share. I would like to know the story behind the accidental Christianity conversion, this seems amusing.

most notable times of being hit on by customers:

guy who tried to impress me with card tricks and failed every single one of them

old man who attempted to get my number when his wife walked away and slipped me his email address ending with “@ aol.com” when i said i don’t do that

cute gay couple that came back to tell me i was cute and then called the shop to ask me out

older professor who i talked to about folklore and told me he dressed as a wizard for recitals saying “this is really embarrassing but umm.. i’d love to get to know you more..” and gave me a receipt with his email address on it

dude in his 40s asking me on a movie date and me saying yes but then he kept starting text conversations with “ahoi hoi”

military guy who said it’d be hot if i killed him with a baseball bat

most notable time a customer did not ask me out:

a man who i knew had a wife and children getting really flustered and saying “um. ive been, uh.. idk if you remember me but um. i come in here a lot and ive uhhh haha umm ive been wanting to ask you for a couple weeks now.. um. have you read the green lantern issue i recommended??????”

[aybeebz]

The drain plug got stuck...

No, he doesn’t wanna talk about it…

Lol, all jokes aside, I love the fact that Stanley's actually really mechanically inclined! I mean hell, how else has he kept that '65 Cadillac of his in such pristine condition??👀

Not to mention teaching himself basic rocket science and quantum physics to understand and rebuild the portal like WHAT

[beaft]

whenever i've worked in retail it has always been emphasised that the Thing To Do when a customer comes in is to approach them and do a big smile and go "hi, how are you!! do you need help finding anything today?" (or something similar).

i thought it was universally agreed that nobody enjoys this, but my friend informs me that apparently this line not only works but noticeably improves sales. so, poll:

[inquisitor-apologist]

Thinking about how, at the end of the day, at the fatal moment, the sunset of the Republic, it wasn’t Yoda, or Obi-Wan, or even the Chosen One himself standing in the way of Palpatine. It was Mace Windu.

Mace Windu, the inventor of Vaapad and Master of Form VII, the Jedi's strongest duelist, the only person to ever defeat Palpatine in combat. Mace Windu, Master of the Jedi Council and the youngest Master ever appointed to it, the revered leader of the Order. Mace Windu, who forgave even those who tried to kill him, who risked his life over and over again for his troops, who, after 3 years of desperate war, tried to negotiate with battle droids. Mace Windu, who knew the clones were created by the Sith and chose to trust them, who saw every Shatterpoint in the Republic, and loved it still, and fought for it until his last breath, until he was betrayed by Anakin, who he believed in and trusted despite everything.

Mace Windu, High General and hero of the Republic, the embodiment of the Light, the last and greatest champion of the Order, the best Jedi to ever live.

[gon-and-killuas-mother]

Canon comic Batman about Superman: you can't trust him, he wasn't born here, his loyalty will always be in doubt, he is not human. Superbat shippers: they arebsoulmates

i am gently holding your face with utmost sympathy. idk if this is you trying to start an argument but my friend, sweet anon, why on earth do you think Batman and Superman are called the World's Finest?

yeah some comics start them off not trusting each other, bc Batman sees all the possible ways things can go wrong. he doesn't know Clark as a person so he sees something similar to Luthor; an alien with god-like powers who could reduce the world to ash if he wanted to (right now I'm thinking of the New 52 Worlds Finest run where Bruce is much less trusting and Clark is much more bullheaded at first) so yeah Bruce sees a Potential Problem and treats Clark as such.

in the Doylist sense, Superman and Batman were two of the first published superheroes (the actual first was The Phantom) and even before they met in the comics, they were already being featured together in posters and splash pages. so they've always been something of a pair in media.

in the Watsonian sense, well. in the first two comic pages below, Superman literally says they compliment each other, they "fit each other like hand and glove." the rest are also incredible moments i happened to have saved on my phone, there's so many more i could show but i don't have the time so!

that last one is right after Batman "died" and Superman found his "corpse" (this is when Bruce was hit by an omega beam from Darkseid and sent on a chaotic trip through the time stream, but through various comic book science bullshit, there was a burnt-to-shit corpse wearing the Batsuit left behind and it was convincing enough to Superman). so yeah this is kinda proof that Superman can absolutely lose his shit, but it's because his best fucking friend died.

and for funsies, here's this one

soooooo yeah. they love each other. platonic, romantic, whatever. i say soulmates because it's a good term to describe them, because in both Doylist and Watsonian senses, they were always meant to be partners, to be two sides of the superhero coin, to be the goddamn World's Finest.

[reaping-the-benefits]

Sugar daddy Price. Sugar daddy Ghost. ENOUGH! I raise you: sugar mommy Laswell.

Laswell, who originally just wanted some pretty young thing to spend some time with. A little eye candy to hang off her arm during all the balls and galas. Maybe take out on a couple of dates. Something to help her feel a little less lonely.

Laswell who decides she likes your company far more than she originally thought. Who spends more and more time with you, until she can coax you into her bed (and out of your clothes)

And you, who enjoys the company of the older woman. Who enjoys the way she spends money on restaurants you can't afford, on jewelry out of your price range, on lacey little lingerie pieces that she easily rips apart in her eagerness to have you.

[taitavva]

madame x

[chippdhearts]

CSI 7x22 || Leapin' Lizards

[dootznbootz]

You can't say "Penelope is the one with the braincell in OdyPen" and then proceed to not have Athena favoring her. To NOT "take her under her wing" as well. Braincells are literally Athena's whole thing. Why would the goddess of wisdom ignore the woman who is constantly praised for being clever, wise, and godlike?

If Penelope has the braincell, then Athena favors her and loves her as well. That's just logic.

[bietrofastimoff23]

"I can′t believe that it's finally me and you, and you and me, just us...

- and your BIG EGO."

i came across the reels "when you date a narcissist" in inst, and i realized that i need to draw it with gwaynston.

[dwightschrute11]

It’s my birthday wooo so I made a little about me inspired by @siboom777s

Fun fact: this is the first time I’ve celebrated my birthday in ten years! :D

plus a little sketch I made the other day of me and my cat

[lameow-l]

GAMING IS MY SON AND IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO HIM IM GONNA KILL EVERYONE IN THIS ROOM AND THEN MYSELF!!

LOOK AT HIM HES SO CUTE

i still have hope in getting the other boys too

its ok they can be a band or smth.. at least then gaming wouldn’t have to be so disappointed in people not hiring him bc he’s just having fun with his boys…

[libra-cant-just-dance]

I should make a Discord server where its for Just Dance people but we all collectively create our own idea of what happened after 2024 story mode and post about it like its canon. The Just Dance fandom but a very specific subset of it where we're all delusional. Anyone who tries to imply that our madeup storyline isn't canon gets kicked.

[qinluna]

this is what it feels like analyzing the l&ds lore when youre versed in numerology, tarot, astrology, spirituality, and any kind of mythology altogether

[mail-me-a-snail]

sometimes i look at the line of characters that people on here have famously infantalized (characters that are also, "coincidentally", widely headcanoned as neurodivergent in some way) and i gotta wonder.

how do you get so far removed from canon that you forget that, considering the themes of their stories, these characters would ABSOLUTELY know what sex is.

[kyurochurro]

lackadaisy has inspired me... what if... they were kitties....