#orc friend

[safyresky]

Scrimbly Jacqueline 29/52: adult supervision does NOT go according to plan...

✨🧪🔥😴💚🧡✨

"Right. Okay. So. Let me get this straight." Jacqueline took a brief, long deep breath in. "You think you've finally managed to perfect your sleeping elixir and Ken's going to test it for you."

"Yep."

"That about sums it up, yes."

"And you decided it'd be best to have an adult on hand, despite both of you being adults."

"I mean...is nineteen hundred really adulty?"

"YES."

"I dunno, Jacqueline. I don't feel very adulty. Ken's way more mature than me."

"Not nearly as such."

"You're too hard on yourself, dude! You're super mature."

Ken blushed. "Oh! Well. Thank you, Fino."

Fino grinned. "Of course!"

"Right. Okay. So you both decided an adult would be wise, despite being mature," she enunciated the T, her voice popping up an octave. "but are still going through with this despite, y'know, all the red flags."

"Yep!"

"Correct."

"And you can't like, test it on like, a mote, because?"

"Motes have a very different physiology from magibeans, Jacqueline."

"And it already works on them! So Ken said he'd give it a try!"

"Us orcs have very high constitution, after all."

"It's true! I've seen him nearly poison himself four times this week alone and seventy-five percent of the time he had zero side effects! Didn't even know he'd ingested poison! The worst thing that happened was a gnarly case of diarr—"

"We don't need to give your sister all the details."

"He's just being a supportive partner!"

"I know how much it means to you to master all facets of magic. I can make sacrifices."

"Right. So. Why me? Why not Mom or Dad? Jack? Lucy?! I mean, she's a MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL, Fino."

"Yeah, and would probably tell us to not do this."

"Debatable. Woman loves her science. She'd MAYBE protest in case, you know, the side effect to sleeping potion is DEATH. But she'd probably stay on site and be able to, y'know, HEAL you BOTH if anything untoward happened."

Fino squinted. "You turn more into mom every day."

"I can't tell if that's an insult or a compliment."

"Just an observation."

"Compliment," Ken clarified.

"Right. Okay. So you decided, quite idiotically, that Lucy was a no. Mom and Dad?"

"Didn't want them to worry!"

"Jack?!"

"Didn't feel right!"

"So you settled on me."

"Yeah! I dunno, I guess I just thought, y'know, out of all the more adulty adults in my life that aren't Ken—"

"We're the same age, Fino."

"Yeah, but maturity! Anyway, the niblets do crazier things—"

"—goddess above, don't remind me."

"So I figured that for something like this, you'd be ideal! You've got the experience, Jacqueline. So? What do you say?"

Fino grinned. His eyes got very, very big and for a brief moment Jacqueline was reminded of when he was much littler and asking for her to pretty please keep the cat, he really likes your room—

She sighed. Rubbed a spot on her temple. "Okay. Fine. But I do NOT approve."

"Don't even worry about it, Jacqueline!"

"There's a very good chance it doesn't work on magibeans yet, after all. Potions and witchcraft aren't Fino's strong suit."

"A fact you will never let me live down," Fino teased, scooping the sunset reminiscent liquid out of the cauldron and pouring it into an uncorked jar. He swirled it; the pinks and oranges gave way to purples and blues, the mixture sparkling.

"I got the colouration right! Yes!"

"Hmm. Perhaps I stand corrected. Well, bottoms up, eh Fin?" Ken took the flask from Fino, lifted it into the air, and chugged it in one go. Placing it down on the counter, he swallowed the last droplet, smacking his lips. "Tastes like gobstoppers."

"Unexpected but delightful result! And how are you feeling?"

Ken licked his lips. "Fine for the most part, though my tusks are a little bit tingly—" his eyes snapped shut and he fell down, face hitting the corner of the island as he plummeted to the floor and landed on his knees, tilting forward until his chin landed on the dirt floor, arms alongside him, ass in the air.

Jacqueline gasped, gently stepping back. Fino lifted the flask. He flushed, looked down at his partner, then up at Jacqueline through the empty vial. He chuckled, embarrassed, and scratched the back of his neck, his fiery locks warm on his skin.

"So, uh. Heh. I guess it worked?"

Ken began to snore.

"Yeah! Maybe a little too well!"

Ken snored louder, the dishes in the sink behind them rattling gently.

"That's probably not a comfortable sleeping position."

"Not unless you're like, five."

"I have a levitation spell for this—"

"Absolutely not! I think he's had MORE than enough magic for the day. I'm calling Donnie. She can lift him easy."

Fino placed the flask down and cleared his throat. "Good call."

✨🧪🔥😴💚🧡✨

hehehe huehuehue hahaha. Meet orc friend! And 1900 year old ish Fino, FULLY REALIZED! And the RETURN of MILF JACQUELINE. FEATURING STOCKING GARTERS. She's only getting Milfier, guys.

Anyway I love Orc Friend (Kenothy, aka, Ken,) sooo much you guys. You don't even KNOW. Today I decided he has the most luscious, wavy, L'Oreal shampoo commercial hair. One day I'll draw him in cleaned UP scrimbly format! But for now, BEHOLD! A BUTT.

Design Notes:

I really did give Fino a goddamn mullet. He's working it.

He alternates between vest and no vest. Since he's at home practising potions, it's a no vest day. This is deffs NOT code for "I forgot he wears a lil vest sometimes. a lil waistcoat, if you will"

Milfline's bun is poofier because it is closer to the end of the day. That thing is five seconds from pulling a Mrs. Claus up-do explosion, and Ken being KO'd by a sleeping potion certainly doesn't help!

K and I were talking about garters and stays and such today and adding them to Jacqueline's fit hit me so hard my desk chair wheeled back on me! More on this next week.

I got a really cool pair of boots in Dreamlight Valley and if I don't adapt them to Milfline I may die about it, more on that next week too!

I RIPPED the PAPER bc I originally had Ken drawn like. Across the page? But I was picturing him butt in the air the way kids pass out. I got home from work, looked at it, and went no wait. this is how it should be doodled, and voila! Orc Friend Butt

Orc Friend Deets, if you're curiouse :3 (under the read more)

Post Colouring Thoughts:

I forgot how. In theory. Fino's patterned dress shirts and rainbow lined cloak are cool as FUCK. But in PRACTISE. Make him look like a bowling alley carpet.

You know what tho? It matches the mullet >:)

Which I am wildly proud of tbh!

Decided that orc friend DOES dress fancy! hence the (matching) green coat with golden buttons >:3

His hair is SO luscious and I put the gold in just to see the lines bc after I coloured it it didn't really show, but now I'm like. idk! I kinda like it!

His right hand got eaten? I sketched it. And now it is gone. I think it's under all that hair.

He also has a BUTT TON of earrings, ya girl just got sleeby and forgot to add them in! But he has like. 5 on each ear and one of the earrings is two studs linked by a chain bc it's NEAT

Maybe I'll do like a proper scrimble of him! I really like Orc Friend you guys :3

[cowboythewizard726]

beautiful orc girl leed helllOOOOO beautiful leed alert oh my GOD she's so cool WOOAHHHH beautiful siilly girl she was really pretty and awesome and so kind i think shes wonderful and there should be a statue made just for her thats really big and in the center of everything and she should get anything she wants ever smile face

[baddecisionsgoooo0]

Transformers X Haso

I need more transformers x Humans are space orcs.

I need these smol, delicate humans the autobots have to protect to pull out Molotov cocktails and destroy decipticon joints.

I need a teacher to mix up a swimming pool size batch of oobleck and trap a cybertronian in it to protect his students.

I need humans using acid, or throwing rocks in joints, or otherwise inconveniencing decepticons while the autobots get more and more concerned.

I need Optimus or Ratchet to morosely bring up something that happened in the war, and a human to be like, "Oh that. Yeah, we made that illegal, it wasn't considered sporting." or "Wait, you guys have been fighting for how long, and that's the most extreme thing you did?"

I need a bot or a con to get curious and open a history book, and the next morning be traumatized by the shit humanity has done.

I need Humans that get tired of the whole, "Humanity is smol and fragile" shtick, and decide to go kill decipticons so they stop attacking the autobots.

I need Optimus to slowly realize we are not cute, fluffy little creatures, but agents of chaos and destruction. Beings who will destroy anyone and anything that threatens our family, and we consider the bots family.

[jimvasta]

Humans will eat anything

But maybe they shouldn't

"Susie, can I ask you a question? I need a human translation."

Susie smiled softly at the small feathered Craksol who reminded her so much of the bantam chickens that ran around the farm she grew up on. They had the small coloured plumage and bouncy stride, all for standing four feet tall and being highly intelligent spacefarers. "Go for it."

"One of the newcomers complimented me, they said I looked delicious," it always pleased Craksols to receive compliments, they worked hard to maintain their feathers. Preening was huge part of their social structure. "But I did not understand the next part. They said they 'have 11 herbs and spices and an air fryer with my name on.' I never exchanged titles with them and we are not at the stage of gifting, did I- Susie, is that your anger face? Why is your warrior waking? Susie?"

"Which of them said that?" Susie glowered at the new human crew lounging by the bar oblivious to the interest as they enjoyed their drinks.

"The one with long face hair."

Susie nodded. "Lukas."

Her fellow human, the towering male who made all the Craksols automatically nervous, had been silent during the exchange but was stood nearby. "I've got it. He'll have a zinger of a black eye when done with him."

"Whatever you do, just make sure it's original recipe regret."

The Craksol took a step back as they witnessed Lukas calmly walk over to his fellows, the first other humans they had seen in months, and swing a punch that knocked the man who gave the mysterious compliment to the ground. "What- Why-?"

"It's better if you don't know. You go back to the ship. Lukas and I need to give some etiquette lessons to the newbie astronauts."

[thedragonboi]

Humans evolved to be friend!!!

Probably stupid but hear me out:

• We try to pet/make friend with everything

• several different species are documented to have raised abandoned/lost humans (famously wolves, but monkeys, parrots, cats and more have raised humans)

• animals that can harm/kill us typically leave us alone (cougars don’t tend to attack unless there’s kittens around, black bears are small but they can 100% kill you if they wanted but they just kinda go away, orcas are smart enough and big enough to hunt us if they wanted to but there’s 0 wild cases of death by orca)

• there are species that are so chill with humans they literally domesticated themselves

• humans get an oxytocin boost when we see cute things, we want to be friend!!!! (Cute is subjective, some people see bugs as creepy some see bugs as friend, there’s always someone who sees something as friend!!)

• we don’t have the best natural defence or offence meaning we ride a lot on “you don’t bother me I don’t bother you” cause idk about you but I got nothing if a horse decides it’s my time to go (yeah we can build armor and weapons but we have to actively make and use them, we don’t come ready made with a suit of metal armor)

In conclusion, I’m very convinced that if we find sentient alien life either they’d find us non threatening at worst, actively adorable and cuddly at best

[stubz]

"Human Kim's mate is dead?!" cries Calis.

"What?! Kim has a mate?!" cries Max

"She is your comrade! How did you not know she has-had a mate?!?"

"But what about Fenrir-wait is Fenrir dead???"

"Human Kim had her bonding band before courting Fenrir, I'm talking about her other mate."

"She's cheating?? Fenrir is the other man...orc???"

"Do humans not have multiple mates?"

"I mean...not usually no...but wait lets back up a minute. How do you know Kim's mate is dead and what do you mean by bonding band, do you mean a ring that goes on a finger?"

"I cannot believe you, her comrade of 5 years, have not noticed her longing rubbing her ankle. How she no longer has the bright orange band on her left ankle. How she looks at her communication device...phone? and looks at what I guess is a photo."

"...wait the orange band? Made out of fabric? Like string?"

"So you have noticed, why have you not consoled her then??"

"...hold on a sec. I'll be back in a moment."

"Are you getting her? Bring her to the command room then, we shall have something for her."

"....how many people think her mate is dead!?"

.

"Why are we going to the command room?"

"Just keep walking. I have a question for you but I need you to answer in front of a lot of people."

"Ookay?" the humans enter the command room and see it decorated dark and somber. Friends and close co-workers are there dressed in black or their respective mourning attire. Calis steps forward.

"Hu-Kim...Kim we are so very sorry for the loss of your mate...may they join the galaxy as a brilliant star and may you both reunite someday in the great beyond..." They slowly grab her five fingered hand with their four fingered hand.

"...If anything were to happen to Gala...I can't even begin to imagine what you are going through. If there's anything you need, anything at all, just ask."

"...Calis...thank you so much...but I don't have a mate?"

"That's what I was saying!" exclaims Max. "If she did then she would've told me, her work best friend!!"

"...but the band on your ankle and your sadness?"

"...Kay I did not notice that but yeah what's up? You alright?" he turns to his short friend

"Ohhh, you mean my friendship anklet?"

"Friend-ship anklet? ...not a bonding band?"

"It was made by my best friend, no offense Max, on Earth the last time I saw her in person 'bout...almost 2 years ago? Anyways it finally fell off since its string and I just miss having it."

"None taken."

"So no one died? She's still alive?"

"Yeah, I just texted her yesterday about the anklet and she said she'll just tattoo one on me cause it'll ward off Max...no offense Max...she just can't accept that I have more than one best friend."

"Again none taken...wait is this the friend who hated you at first and you didn't know so you kept being friendly to her until eventually she accepted you and you've been best friends for like almost 10 years?"

"She...hated you?"

"Oh yeah, she thought I was really annoying but I'm pretty dense so I just kept being nice and going to eat lunch with her throughout high school until after like...2-3 months she gave up and accepted my friendship. Oh! and I didn't know any of this until like this year." she grins

"That's a beautiful friendship right there...makes me jealous about how boringly we met and bonded over anime and musicals."

"On most planets beings would maul you over your annoyance...would you like some of the cake we got you before we knew no one died?"

"Yes please! Also thank you everybody but sadly...and luckily no one died!!" she calls out to the dozen or so aliens and humans in the command room.

"...wait you thought I was having an affair with Fenrir!?" cries a horrified Kim

"That's what I was saying!!" screams Max

[mindful-mountaineer]

Humans Are Weird: Adrenaline

“I’m coming, Steve!”

“Adam, I’m okay. I swear, man.” Steve’s voice sounded like he was breathing much too hard.

Adam shook his head. “You are a filthy liar. Faradae?”

“He’s not looking too hot. I need to see what was sliced.” At least that human seemed to be logical.

Adam grunted and moved the rock even farther at Faradae’s words. He pulled harder, yelling as it slid across the terrain. 

Knycuz watched, stunned. He did not see how this was physically possible. Klyls were three times as strong as humans, and he could not move the rock.

But Adam managed to create a space large enough for him to crawl through. There were sounds of a slight struggle, a strangled noise, and then Adam emerged holding Steve in his arms.

Faradae followed them out, immediately kneeling to pull out items from his pack as Adam set Steve down. Faradae quickly ripped open Steve’s pants to clean the fluids off of his extremity. Adam stood over him the whole time, watching carefully, urging Steve to drink clear liquid.

“How is this possible?” Knycuz was looking at Kai next to him. “How could Adam move something I could not? I am stronger.”

“It’s called adrenaline. In some circumstances when we really need to be able to do things like lift heavy stuff, our body pumps out this chemical that can allow us to do impressive feats. Adam really cares about Steve. He needed to get to him. You tried, but you were not frantic. You did not need to get to Steve. Adam needed to, and his body supplied him the energy to do it.”

“Your body has the ability to perform these feats, but you can only access it in rare circumstances?”

Kai nodded. “Yeah. It’s usually to save ourselves or someone we care about.”

Knycuz nodded, too. It was quite an interesting way to respond to these situations. He continued to watch as Adam lifted Steve to his feet, carefully helping him to the carrier. Adam kept watching Steve in a way Knycuz had not observed humans look at each other before.

If you liked this excerpt, you’ll like the full story! Now updated and edited.

Humans Are Weird now out on Amazon! https://www.amazon.com/kindle-vella/story/B0DDG5C9Z8

And the first ten chapters are FREE!

[bacchuschucklefuck]

species medley ft. gorgug and riz

[wildwren]

#i would die for them

[sleepyorc]

ORC FACTS

Orcs go crazy over labour rights. Are you not getting paid overtime? Why not tell an Orc and they'll give your employer a bit of... Gentle Persuasion...

[braxix]

Maglor: I'm actually starting to get concerned about what Elrond brings home.

Maedhros: About time. What clues you in? The warg pup or the sixteen orcs he has befriended and folded into society?

Maglor: He came home with a baby dragon this time. Elros said no for us, don't worry.

[safyresky]

YOOO hellooo!!

Okay! It took me awhile to think of some titles, lmao, BUT:

Snap, Crackle, Pop

Road Trip

Lazy Day

Poker Face

Ghost Town

These are all from my braino but I DID at one point consult a fic title generator just to see what it cooked up and the first result was “Case of the Blue Pygmy” which— you don’t have to do anything with, but thought you’d appreciate bc it had me absolutely. HowLING. Catch Mel constantly referring to Jack as “the Blue Pygmy” from this point onwards, lmaooooo.

ALSO ALSO PLEASE tell me about Fino’s orcish rival, they sound fab!!! The Lucy in me is already shipping like mad! 🥺🥺💖

THANK YOU FOR ASKING ABOUT THIS ORCISH FELLOW OF FINO'S (not to sound like my 60 plus year old neighbour) BECAUSE I LOVE HIM TO BITS (orc friend shenanigans under cut)

ANYWAY, HERE'S WONDERWALL PROMPT REPLIES

Snap, Crackle, Pop

Would take place in Pyros House Arrest AU. Could also be called "How Jacqueline Finally Got Used To Having Her Evil Uncle Around".

CRYSTAL SPRINGS SPOILERS ABOUND

In which, during multiple midnight rice krispies cereal excursions, Jacqueline and Pyros start to sort of get along. Sort of. Would include: a lot of roasting (Pyros is like is this how Blaise is going to kill me dead if I don't behave?? His teenage/young adult daughter just roasts me to death with WORDS?!). Unpacking the whole, uh, evil mind control bit, and uh. All that. As well. She doesn't forgive her Uncle for taking away her agency and attempting to destroy everything she knows, however, she can make him see how bad that was. Y'know. Through ROASTING. Until the ice breaks with a shitty joke >:)

CRYSTAL SPRINGS SPOILERS UN-ABOUND

Road Trip

The Legates get de-magic'd and have to road trip cross country (countries?!?!?) to get their magic back in working order.

This one is an ANCIENT idea that popped into my head MANY years ago when I was at the Big Apple. Not New York, no; at the Big Apple, Canada, which is this roadside attraction off the highway in the Trenton/Kingston corridor. It's. Well.

It's a Big Apple.

Google it.

You Will See why I say it is a CURSED OBJECT. The guy who created it was inspired by DISNEYLAND I shit you not. The view from the top of the apple is abysmal. IT'S ON THE SIDE OF THE 401. THERE'S NOTHING TO SEE BUT TREES AND PEOPLE DRIVING BAD AND ANYWHERE FROM 20 TO 40KM OVER THE LIMIT. Their claim to fame, aside from the giant murderous apple that could TOTALLY be a weeping angel, are apple based products. They only got an apple orchard like in the last 5ish years. They have existed for at LEAST twenty.

ANYWAY they have this sign at the front of the shop that just has like, all these locations and how far from the Big Apple they are, and one of them is the North Pole, and every time I see that sign (I regret to admit I have stopped at the big apple too much for my liking), I think of a scenario where Jacqueline tries to poof herself and several legates, but their magic is fuckey so who KNOWS where they'll end up, and when they appear she sees the 401, sees the big apple, and is just like GOD FUCKING DAMMIT. Thankfully a witch she knows has a little shop down the street so they go there for help! (Mel perhaps? Who's to say!)

Lazy Day

Blaise tries to have a lazy day. It does not go well at all. This man is inCAPABLE of doing nothing. Winter catches him prepping dinner and she almost freezes him solid. She's like, this is not how a lazy day works. Blaise is like but we need to eat and Winter's like I CAN COOK, DEAR, BACK TO THE COUCH GO ON NOW DON'T MAKE ME KNOCK YOU OUT

Poker Face

Either Winter enters a poker tournament and cleans everybody out, gets banned from poker tournaments. OR. A 1000 word piece on all of Blaise's tells told from Winter's POV (maybe a stream of consciousness bc I think Winter's thoughts must be very funny) that explains why he's so easy to read (to her) because, believe it or not, Winter doesn't actually cheat at cards ;)

Ghost Town

Diteline kids find themselves in a right pickle when they are trapped in a literal ghost down. It is deserted except for ghosts. Robyn and Eira/Bianca (still haven't decided on which name for her ): won't stop bickering about which one of the two of them got the three siblings stuck in the Ghost Town. Robyn's like you shouldn't have opened the weird door! And Eira/Bianca is like YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WENT hey sis check out this cool scroll, and ACTIVATED IT MISTER OU LOOK AT ME, I CAN WARLOCK!

While the two youngest are arguing, Joy reaches out and touches a ghost and it goes from a passive little floating sad sack to a murderous violence machine, making things about 1000% worse.

So now the three have to fend off all the murderous shades while trying to figure out why they're trapped and if putting the ghosts back in the afterlife will free them from Ghost Town because Mom's making burritos tonight and Mater made an angel food cake with SPRINKLES IN IT and this is one of the FAVOURITE dinner/dessert combos the kiddos have.

Object: Figure out why the ghost town exists, fight the ghosts to get the town fixed, and make it back home in time for dinner!

Their moms have no idea where the kids are today. It's just a fun evening of cooking for them, while their kids are facing The Horrors.

---

"The Blue Pygmy" sounds like some kind of very inconvenient little monster, so I think Mel's onto something with dubbing Jack that lmao. Either that, or it's a weird magibean cold/flu 😂😂😂😂.

DR. MILLER, WE'VE GOT PYGMYS, CODE BLUE and she's like well SHIT! and rushed over to be a bamf doctor witch as she do!

Anyway, thanks for sending this in!

(from this post: send me a made up fic title and i'll tell you what i'd write about)

RIGHT SO ORC FRIEND

I haven't even NAMED HIM YET but he snuck his way right into my heart (and also Fino's! Fun fact! Of all 4 kiddos Fino is the only one to ACTUALLY TELL A PERSON HE LIKES THAT HE LIKES THEM. He's the suave one out of all 4, believe it or not. Jack is like "I'll keep everything bottled up inside until I DIE", Jacqueline is the most OBLIVIOUS mother fucker and then, when aware, an absolute MESS of a magibeing, and Fiera panics hard before finally attempting to take the first step if she doesn't get overwhelmed with uh. EMOTIONS and EVERY WORD SHE WNATS TO SAY EXPLODING ALL AT ONCE while she's trying to do the asking) and I am soft for him and Fino! Ah!

BUT ANYWAY when Fins is in caster school, he meets this orc who always, always, ALWAYS has to get better marks than him. It's like a competition. Very one sided, bc Fino's just vibing and happy to learn. But Orc Friend is like, if I do not surpass this sprite I will surely perish.

Turns out, the orc is under a lot of pressure from a parent to DO BETTER for w/e reason, and our orc friend is very stressed until one day he like, explodes when Fino gets half a mark better than him on an ALREADY PERFECT TEST.

Fino, who has 0 concept of this competition being a thing, is like dude. Okay. Why is this a thing. Why are you so upset, the only reason I got a half mark more was b/c of this doodle here! Like why are you pitting us against each other, that's how you get RANK mental health!

And the orc admits that his parent or parents really want him to be top of his class and DO BETTER and he's really, really trying but he doesn't LIKE it and it's taking the joy out of learning all the magic shit and Fino is, of course, appalled bc learning is SO FUN TO HIM. HE LOVES THAT SHIT. How DARE someone make learning NOT FUN. ILLEGAL

So they become study buds and Fino helps him like, love learning again. Orc friend does a LOT better when Fino is making it fun and helping him not feel the pressures of home life NEEDING him to do good! He's just doing it! And their one-sided rivalry ship becomes a funky two-sided FRIENDLY rivalry that they both ham up on occasion (Fiera is very proud when Fino fake dies when Orc Friend does better than HIM by half a mark, Orc Friend thinks it's gd hilarious) and Orc Friend now has a Fino Friend!

Anyway, they become roommates later on and Fino brings him to holidays and shit and he v much becomes one of the family and is often referred to as Fino's partner :) I'm still debating if Fins is on the aro scale or not, so this bit's a little murky, BUT it is so important to me that you know that when Fino's like oh I like this dude more than normal, he is like to Orc Friend "Hey man, I think ur real neat, wanna go out??" Like. It is SO IMPORTANT TO ME THAT YOU KNOW, THAT EVERYONE KNOWS, THAT FINO IS THE ONLY FROSTY KIDDO TO ACT NORMAL WHEN LIKING SOMEONE. SO IMPORTANT TO ME TO MAKE THIS KNOWN.

okay I opened this ask with this bit but I have gotten uh, carried away with Orc Friend (who feels like a Ken?? But that CAN'T be right), so imma just. Slide this under a cut and pretend I STARTED with the uh, original ask box shenanigan :o

but YEAH. Holidays at Frost Manor are FUN in later years. Fino and Orc Friend are like, sparring together in the backyard, talking smack and shit (it's their flirting). Fiera's latest catch is probably schmoozing the parents, unless it's her one long term partner who is SO fucking normal, he's probably like, grilling with Blaise and Fiera is just sitting at the bench like, ogling him like "my god. my god he is flipping burgers while holding the WORST beer ever. He is so normal. holy shit. I'm love him".

Dite and Jacqueline are being v cute, or, Dite is being a sweetheart while Jacqueline either A) ogles Dite being sunshine incarnate while Fiera ogles mister normal, or, B) doing something absolutely batshit with the Diteline kids (depending where in the timeline we are) and dodging Fins and Orc Friend sparring.

Suddenly Jack goes flying through a window, lands in a heap. Killian sticks his head out the broken window, laughing at Jack's pain.

Just another holiday at Frost Manor ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[chaoticcomposition]

a (slightly belated) evie dressed as the 2004 van helsing for halloween!

[jeeaark]

Remember Auntie Ethel's victim who could see people's possible futures? Yeaaah, Greygold walked right into that prophecy.

In the Far Realms, they have memory foam beds

[babyblueetbaemonster]

Sir Mazoga, having a normal dinner.

[not-an-alien-scientist]

Human: Hi Buddy!! AWWW DRAGON! COME ON DRAGON!! *gives all the pets*

Alien: ..... that is a carnivore that can bite at 1,100 psi force .... why are you calling it buddy

Human: Oh hooo hoo what is that *scritches* huh?

Hyena: *jumps*

Alien: *alarmed* !!!!!!

Human: >:( no you can't have the camera