#skunks

[alex51324]

#I got skunk............#those are not native to my continent so I've nebver smelled one#but from what I read about them having one in your dorm might be a bad idea#they do look sort of cute I guess

They are super-cute! They usually only spray their terrible-smelling stuff after a fairly lengthy warning display*, so assuming that you and the skunk have some sort of mental bond where it doesn't see you as a threat and you can calm it down if it gets scared, you might be OK. And you would have very effective protection from being bullied at Copyright-Free Magic School, because if anybody makes you too upset to calm your familiar, the entire school is going to suffer the consequences.

(*They only have a limited amount at a time, so if they use it, they're defenseless for about a week while they build up a new supply.)

You show up for your first day at Copyright-Free Magic School. As you're going through orientation, you're informed that all new students get a school-assigned familiar that they are responsible for housing and maintaining. The staff member assures you that your assigned familiar is appropriately chosen and reflects you in some way.

Spin this to find out yours. (Remember, you are responsible for maintaining this familiar in your dorm room.)

[animentality]

[dearmouse]

Vintage Skunk Figurine

[dragoncuspid]

A skunk was foraging in my yard this morning, I’m so happy he stuck around! (Also had a staring contest with a squirrel)

(Photos taken by me on FujiFilm X-T30)

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[qsfocus]

[kness]

🦨🦨🦨☕

[ostdrossel]

This just happened on my ground cam! Awe! I hope mommy keeps them away from the road. And I want to see the one in the daylight!

[bug2go]

[commission] 1hour commission for client via Twitter

[oh-bother-stickers]

[marlynnofmany]

One More Earth Animal

Since the only reason our spaceship had a cat was because I’d rescued a family of them from people who had no business keeping any animal, and since a couple of crewmates had helped in that rescue, and everyone was agreed that it was a deed well done, I was very interested when I heard that our newest courier job was transporting another rescued cat.

I was loading supplies on the far end of the ship when I got a message from the captain about this last-minute addition. I was the animal expert — from the same planet as our new cargo, no less — and she requested my presence. The extra info that the cat had been dumped on a colony world by illegal traders who hadn’t been able to sell it just made me hurry through the hallways faster.

As I entered the cargo bay, my thoughts were on whether I should have detoured to grab a medical scanner, and wondering if Telly would want to be friends with the furball in the cage. Where was that cage? Ah, over by the door next to the captain and the customer. Other crewmates were loading boxes while they talked.

“I’m glad you’re going in the right direction,” the customer said while she signed the payment tablet with several red tentacles, while waving two more for emphasis. “This isn’t the first time somebody’s dumped live cargo, and at least this time I know a guy from the right planet who’s eager for a new pet. Sounds like he misses Earth, and would be happy to have anything that reminds him of home. Oh hey, speaking of which!” She waved a tentacle at me as I walked up. “Another Earthling. Good luck all around.”

Captain Sunlight nodded and took the payment tablet back, every inch the dignified lizard alien. “Yes, Robin here has been a big help with animal cargos, cats in particular.”

“My pleasure,” I said with a wave. “Can I get a look?” The cage was the kind with bars on the front and only ventilation holes on the sides; good for animals that needed to feel safely hidden, but not great for trained veterinarians wanting to inspect them without opening the door.

“By all means,” the customer said, scooting the cage forward. “It’s been very calm. It shouldn’t give you any trouble.”

I crouched down from my tall human height and peered into the shadows, hoping the cat was healthy, not calm because of illness. Had they scanned it already? They must have.

A skunk peered back at me.

“Oh jeez!” I fell back and scrambled away, startling everyone in the room. “That’s not a cat! Keep your distance!”

Captain Sunlight immediately stepped away, alarm on her scaly face. “What is it? What’s the danger?” The customer was babbling in surprise, but I ignored her.

“That’s a skunk,” I said, fully aware that the name probably meant nothing here. “They’re a breathing hazard when provoked. They spray a toxic liquid that will ruin the air on our whole ship until it’s properly cleaned. You’re lucky it didn’t do it already.” I aimed that last at the customer.

She flailed her tentacles in distress. “It’s been very calm! Not afraid of anyone! Are you sure it’s not a cat?”

“Yes,” I said firmly. Then something else occurred to me. “Have you scanned it for disease?”

The tentacle movements turned guilty. “My assistant said he did…”

I leapt to my feet and raced down the hall. “Be right back! Don’t touch it!”

They replied, but I was already out of earshot, dodging past crewmates without stopping to explain. Rabies was largely eradicated on Earth, but this wasn’t Earth. And a potentially rabid skunk was infinitely worse than a tame one.

Eggskin was in the medbay; I didn’t pause to see what they were doing. I just grabbed the hand scanner from its spot on the wall and raced back the way I’d come. “Need this, thanks!”

Questions followed me, but I ran faster. Almost plowed into Blip going around a corner, but I ducked under her muscular elbow with an apology and kept going. Blop was right behind her, stepping to the side. The pair also had questions that I ignored.

Back in the cargo bay, Captain Sunlight was questioning the customer on the far side of the room, with Zhee and Paint also standing back. The cage was right where I’d left it.

I activated the scanner, getting as close as I dared. “Please don’t have rabies. Please please please.”

After a moment, the scanner pinged: Free Of Disease. Relief hit me like a wave. “It’s not contagious,” I announced.

The scanner was still processing, and it came up with extra information that made me laugh in deeper relief.

“Its stink gland was removed!” I collapsed onto the floor in front of the cage. “Doubly safe. Everything’s okay.”

Captain Sunlight said, “That is good news.”

The customer pressed several tentacles over where her heart probably was. “I didn’t need that kind of scare today! Clearly I should have words with the assistant who identified the species.”

“They got the planet right, at least,” I said, shutting off the scanner. “But yeah, if there’s a chance there are more skunks wandering around out there, you do NOT want to assume they’ll act like cats.”

Captain Sunlight was thinking ahead. “Will this be a problem for the recipient? Since it’s not the animal he’s expecting?”

The customer spread her tentacles. “He did say that he’d welcome any creature from home that could handle living indoors!”

I waggled my fingers experimentally, and the skunk waddled forward to sniff them. “I think it’ll be okay.”

Captain Sunlight asked, “This is an acceptable companion animal, once the gland is removed?”

I laughed. “No, they make terrible pets. But people have kept worse. I’ll have a talk with the guy on delivery, and I think it’ll be fine. This little fluffer has probably been raised by hand. And skunks really are adorable, once you get past that whole spraying issue.”

“Good to know,” said Captain Sunlight. She finished the transaction with the customer, who was more than happy to leave the skunk in our possession. Zhee and Paint expressed their own relief and finished moving boxes around. The captain volunteered to put the scanner back while I brought the animal cargo to our quietest storage hold.

I carried the cage very carefully, the polar opposite of my wild dash through the corridors earlier.

It took a while for Eggskin to find me, since apparently Blop had gotten a papercut or something that needed tending to, but after a few minutes the medic entered the storage bay with all the caution of someone approaching a dangerous creature.

Eggskin probably wasn’t expecting to find me holding it and cooing sweet nonsense while it chittered happily in my lap. But it really was friendly, and like I said, skunks are adorable.

~~~

These are the ongoing backstory adventures of the main character from this book.

Shared early on Patreon! There’s even a free tier to get them on the same day as the rest of the world.

The sequel novel is in progress (and will include characters from these stories. I hadn’t thought all of them up when I wrote the first book, but they’re too much fun to leave out of the second).

[antiqueanimals]

Along Four-Footed Trails; Wild Animals of the Plains as I Knew Them. Written by Ruth A. Cook, with illustrations by Mabel Williamson. 1903.

Internet Archive

[shiftythrifting]

various intriguing items spotted at the northwest’s largest garage sale

[taxonomytournament]

Taxonomy Tournament: Mammals

Chiroptera. This order is made up of bats, the only mammals capable of self-powered flight. It is the second-most speciose order of mammals, with over 1400 species.

Caniformia. This suborder of Carnivora contains dogs, foxes, bears, otters, badgers, raccoons, skunks, seals, and walruses.

[friend-crow]

I'd read that skunks are bad jumpers, and today I was tired from gardening and didn't bother to bring in the (empty) crow bowl, so now we are witnessing just how bad they really are.

It's out there pining for the bowl, and I'm sitting in bed laughing at its inability to get airborne.

[theartisticendeavor]

Art by Victoria Maderna