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#or my thoughts behind it. whatever is interesting
entitled-fangirl · 1 day
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Meek.
Cregan Stark x Baratheon!reader
Summary: Cregan is determined to be a different man for his betrothed than the men in her family.
Warnings: poor treatment of women, sexism, cursing, talks of sex, making out
A/N: Based on TWO asks!!!! Also--- not proofread😯
Masterlist
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Everyone knew the absolute torment that house Baratheon put their women through.
They were cruel to them, not caring for anything but their own pleasure. That was well known.
When Cregan was betrothed to Lord Baratheon's second eldest daughter, he wondered how she'd fair under the Northern weather.
Lord Baratheon didn't even bother to see her go, sending her off to the Wolf with just her handmaidens and guards to see her safe to Winterfell.
Cregan stood at the doors, his shoulders back in a display of northern pride. He was beyond grateful to rid the sweet woman from the ungrateful Baratheons.
The moment her horse stepped through the gate, his people were attentive to her, taking her belongings and beginning to carry them into the castle.
She watched them with widened eyes, confused by their kindness. Cregan quickly stepped down the stairs to her, "Welcome, my lady."
Her head snapped to him and looked down at him from her horse. She said nothing in fear of saying the wrong thing.
He reached up and gently pulled the reigns from her hands. The leather slid from her grasp slowly. She dared not to intervene. 
Once he had the reigns in his hand, he pulled on them, walking the horse further into the yard and closer to Winterfell.
She merely let him as she held to the saddle. 
Cregan felt a small smile grow on his face. She was a curious thing. It was too bad she wouldn't voice her thoughts. 
As he looked up at her, he decided then to change that. He would get her to open up one day.
He tied the reigns off and held out his hand to her. "Let me help you." She reminded him of a skittish doe, ready to run at any sign of danger.
Her shaky hand reached out, and she swung her leg over the horse. She stared at him expectantly.
He let go and grabbed her waist, holding her as he slid her down the horse's side and placed her on the ground.
"Thank you, Lord Stark," her soft voice finally spoke.
He swore he'd never heard anything sweeter.
How the Baratheons could bare to mistreat her, he'll never know.
He told the North that he was in no way going to rush the marriage. So she stayed in the Winterfell walls unwed so he could understand her more before becoming one.
He felt like he owed her that. 
She deserved to be known. 
She had become a little more comfortable around him, beginning to slowly speak to him about only the things that were essential to say aloud.
The two walked the grounds together, a routine they had developed over time. 
"I wish you'd speak about things that don't matter," he finally mentioned. He peeked over to her to see her reaction.
Her brows furrowed as she stared in front of her, "I don't understand."
"I didn't mean it in that sense I suppose." He reached up with his free to stroke the hair on his chin in thought of what to say. "I want to know the things that you worry I'll find unimportant. Does that make sense?"
She hesitantly shook her head.
He sighed softly at how to correct his words. Finally, he shrugged. "I want to know you."
"You do," she countered quietly. 
"I don't," he smiles as he brushed hair behind her ear, "but I'd like to."
She sucked in a sharp breath at his touch to her face. The men in her family were far from this gentle. "I assure you there is nothing of interest to me."
"There is, I'm sure. I'll find it."
She nodded, "Whatever you wish, my lord." She began to walk again.
He pulled her back, "Not so quickly." He reached down and pulled both of her hands into his. "Don't say what you wish me to hear. Say what you are thinking."
"Why would I do that?" She asked innocently. 
He cursed under his breath but didn't let her see the way his jaw clenched. "It matters to me. Your thoughts, I mean."
She stared at their intertwined hands, "Even the unpleasant ones?"
"Especially the unpleasant ones."
It was a strange concept for her, but she nodded as her brain began to truly consider what he was asking for. 
He smiled in relief, still holding one hand and beginning to walk again. "Let us start with simple matters. Perhaps… your favorite novel?"
Her head snapped to him, "I don't… I…"
His thumb rubbed over her knuckles, "I know you have one. I've seen the way book pages soak you in like water."
The question had been a sensitive one. She shrugged in a fake nonchalant fashion and kept walking, "I don't have one."
He hummed lowly, a small warning. "Don't lie. Just say what it is."
"I… I don't remember the name of it," she finally admitted. 
He accepted that answer. "I see. What was it about?"
Her big eyes looked up at him, debating what to say. "It was… a fiction."
He smiled, "I see. There can be enjoyment in fictional novels, can't there?" He waited to say what else she would say. Each new piece of herself she revealed to him, he treasured like a precious stone.
"Well… it is the only one I've read, I'm afraid," she smiled weakly, eager to change the subject.
"The only?" He asked in pure shock. "The only one?"
She nodded, keeping in a certain side of herself. "It was left behind. Father has it."
"Ah," he said finally. 
That evening, he wrote to Lord Baratheon, urging him to send her favorite book. He was straight to the point, telling the man he could send the novel to earn Stark's forgiveness for avoiding the wedding.
A few weeks later, a letter arrived addressed to Lord Stark. He almost ripped it out of the maester's hand in concern when he saw the Baratheon sigil in the wax. It was a thick roll, only making his concern spike.
He pulled it open, revealing a few pages that fell from his hand. 
Book pages.
Ripped book pages. 
He picked up one with a shaking hand. He began to see red as he looked back up at the maester. "What is the meaning of this?"
The maester held out his hand, "Allow me to read this for you, my lord."
Cregan handed the letter to him as he began to gather the few book pages that were sent to him.
The maester's face turned white. "He dares to disrespect you."
"Do not tell me these are what I believe them to be," he growled lowly.
"I'm afraid they are."
Cregan's hand slammed the papers onto the desk in pure rage and stormed out of the room.
Cregan swung his sword with a fury. His sparring partner could hardly keep up, but he knew his Lord just needed to get out his anger.
His partner was grateful when Cregan's betrothed interrupted them.
"Cregan?"
Cregan faltered, freezing in place and turning his head to her. "Yes?" He asked with a surprisingly soft voice.
She wrung her hands nervously. "I… Forgive me. I shouldn't have interrupted."
He stood up tall, handing his sword off to his partner and waving him off. "No. Please. Tell me what you need."
She hummed and let out a deep breath. "I've been thinking."
He nodded, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "Aye…"
"I'm ready to marry you."
He sucked in a sharp breath. "What?"
"I- I want to marry you, Cregan."
He saw the absolute nervousness that radiated through her frame to admit that to him.
He stepped to her, "You're sure?"
She nodded. "If you still want me."
He stepped further to her in urgency, "Of course, I do. Never think that I wouldn't."
She stared at him, now unsure of where to go from there.
Cregan smiled. "Shall I set a date for the wedding then?"
Her eyes lit up. "Would you?"
"I would. And I shall. We shall have it two weeks before Winter strikes. I will leave for the Wall not long after. Would that suffice?"
She looked down at her hands. 
"What?" He tilted his head down, hoping to get her to look at him. "Did you wish for after winter? That could be quite a while."
She had worked herself up just to admit wanting to marry him. How could he expect her to do more?
"Talk to me, pretty girl."
She'd never been called that before. It made something inside of her stir. 
"It's so far," she whispered.
He felt a chill down his spine at her small confession. He gulped as the anger left him completely. "Sooner then?"
"Sooner."
He nodded, biting his lower lip in deep thought. "Aye. Soon then."
A bright smile pulled at her lips. "Thank you, Cregan."
He grinned back. "Of course. Now, go on," he tutted playfully, "Your betrothed must finish his spar."
Red came to her cheeks, "Right. Right, of course. Excuse me, Lord Stark-"
"-Cregan," he quickly corrected.
"Cregan."
He watched her leave. There was a slight skip to her step now that he hadn't noticed about her before. 
Perhaps she was finding happiness in Winterfell.
The wedding was a large northern celebration. The bannermen and families came  from miles around to witness their Warden's wedding.
Everyone was too kind. It was beginning to worry her.
"Quite the feast, I'd say," Cregan smiled at her as the two sat at the high table. 
Her hands immediately reached for her chalice of wine.
And she didn't stop for the entire night.
"Let us retire," he suggested when she tried to refill her cup again. His hand reached out and gently placed it over hers. "It is getting late. And before you fret, the bedding ceremony will not happen. It is only you and I."
Her eyes softened in surprise, not expecting him to say that. "One more glass for courage?" She slurred slightly.
His brows ticked down for only a second before he composed himself. "Courage isn't needed for this. Are you truly this nervous?"
"I'm perfectly content," she huffed. 
The crease between his brows returned. That was uncharacteristic of her to speak in frustration. Had the wine affected her? "Then let us go, hmm?"
She nodded, setting her cup down. "Very well."
He stood, offering his hand out to her. She took it and stood, trying to hide the slight falter in her first step. She moved her hand up to his bicep, letting him lead her from the banquet hall.
Entering their chambers, she sat on the bed. "Will you have me on my back or shall you take me from behind?" She asked bluntly, no hint of embarrassment or hesitation to her.
Cregan hand on the doorknob faltered. He locked the door and turned to her with shock on his face, "What was that?"
"Which way do you fuck, Lord Stark?" She asked in the same tone.
He shook his head with an amused chuckle. He stepped to her, reaching down and pushing her chin up to look at him. "I will not be fucking you tonight." He watched her posture change, a relaxation coming to her. "Why would you ask something so crude? It's unlike you."
"You wanted me to speak my mind, and I have," She stated in frustration. 
"You certainly have," he commented. "But I have a feeling that the wine is twisting your words. Tell me why you indulged in so much wine tonight."
She shrugged, "Why do you care?"
He gently pulled her chin back up, "I care about you."
"There it is." Her nose twitched. "I don't know what to do when you say things like that."
He stood straight, "You didn't answer the question."
"Fine!" She stood up and stepped around him, "I drank so much because I have never known a man to be as kind as you and it frightens me."
"Frightens you? How so?" Cregan was beyond confused. He turned to watch her.
She stepped to the fireplace and buried her hands in her hair in frustration. "I've never wanted to speak my mind to anyone until I met you, and now I fear I'll say something I shouldn't and ruin it all. Do you know what that feels like? To know that one wrong word could send you back to…" Her voice faded off. 
"I don't. And neither do you, because regardless of your words, I'm not going to send you back there. You're a Stark. The Baratheons are only a name now- if you want them to be, that is. If you want to truly be a Stark in name and heart." He offered. His calculating eyes watched her closely now, frowning at the tugging of her hair.
"Even after I've indulged myself in wine and ruined our wedding to the point that you refuse to consummate the marriage with me?" She turned to him and only then did he see the glimmer of the tears that sat in her eyes. 
"You did not ruin anything. But I will not sleep with you as long as you are not fully aware of your actions."
"I am aware," she huffed.
"We shall see in the morning." The slightest amused smile come over him. "I promised to take you to bed one way or the other. Perhaps tonight, it is only to sleep and nothing more." He walked to her. "Turn around. Let me undo your laces, stubborn woman."
She did as he asked, pulling her hair over her shoulder. "Will I regret this tomorrow?"
"The marriage or this particular conversation?" He asked. "If it has to be one, I hope it is the latter. I personally enjoy the former."
She hummed, pulling her outer dress down once Cregan had untied it enough. Layer by layer, she threw each piece to the cloth chair not far from the fire. 
Cregan's careful hands untied each string they came across. 
Silence filled the room, and she broke it with a small sniffle. Her voice was much softer now, "Do you believe my father didn't want to be here? Is that something you believe?"
Of course, he believed it, but he wouldn't say it. "I'm not sure. Do you, sweet girl?"
She hummed, "I do."
That surprised him. "Ah. Do continue speaking your mind, please. Do not let me stop you."
"He has a particular hatred for women. I'm not sure where it started. When he had a firstborn daughter rather than son, my mother was fearful for the girl. I was second. He married us off without a second thought. Dare I admit to you that he signed me away to you without truly reading the document?"
Cregan placed his hands on her clothed hips and spun her to face him.
No wonder she came here so fearful. She was mistreated from the beginning. He stared into her eyes for a moment, letting the silence settle. He reached up and brushed his fingers on her cheek. "How could a man ever hate you?" He asked with a barely heard voice.
Her heart jolted, "I have never felt love before. Is it supposed to feel this warm?"
Cregan let out a joyful laugh as he ran his hands through her hair. "I want to say yes, but you're near the fire. And the wine is coloring your cheeks. We shall revisit this when you are well. Let us get you to bed."
"Bed? Right." She pulled herself from him and moved to the bed. She tucked herself under the covers.
Cregan's smile stayed. "Are you warm enough for the night?"
"Yes, but… are you not staying?"
He shook his head. "I don't want you to wake in a fright if tonight's details blur in your mind. Waking beside me may be startling for you."
"No! I-" she looked around the room in thought. "I want you to stay. I want that."
His head tilted. "Alright. If you want this. But know that nothing will happen to you while I stay here tonight."
"I can live with that," she admitted as she laid on the bed completely.
Darkness filled the room with Cregan blew out the candles, and the bed dipped down as he laid on it. 
In the morning, she awoke with a groan. The sun was burning her eyes. 
"Ah, you're awake," Cregan's voice commented from across the room.
She sat up and rubbed at her eyes until they were raw, determined to get the feeling to fade. When she did, a headache began to erupt.
"Easy," he chided as he walked to her. He reached to the nightstand and held a cup out to her. "The maester made a tea to help with the pain."
She sipped it gratefully. "I had the strangest dream that I'm fearing is true," she said with a groggy voice.
He watched her with a glimmer in his eyes. His hand reached to her and smoothed her hair down.
She peered up at him. She wondered how someone could be so thoughtful.
"Tell me something," he said as sat down at her side. "If that's alright."
"Anything," she whispered. Her eyes flickered to his lips. 
"Is the warmth still there?" 
He watched her face began to near his. She placed her hand on his leg to help her lean over to him. "I believe I love you," she admitted gently.
He smiled and leaned the rest of the way to her. His lips kissed her softly and slowly. 
Before she could truly react, he pulled away again. The grin on his lips returned, as were his hands in her hair, "I was going to gift this to you yesterday, but I believe today is a better day for it."
"Oh," her shy demeanor returned and she set the cup down.
"Don't fret. You'll adore it. Or… I hope you do."
She watched him get up from the bed, beginning to dig though a drawer in his closet. 
He returned with a book in his hand. "It took some time, but I believe it was worth it."
She reached out and took it, examining the cover. She only stared at it for a moment before her eyes lit up. "Is this-?"
"Your favorite novel? It is." His head tilted back and forth, "Or, at least, I believe it is."
"This isn't the same copy as the one with my Father," she remarked.
"No, it's not. I tried to recover it but was unsuccessful. I hope this copy with be worthy of your happiness."
"Oh, Cregan," she mused. "It's… it is too much. I don't understand."
"It is a wedding gift. Do not think twice about it. You haven't the feignest idea of how far I would go to please you," he admitted.
"I've never had someone do something so selfless on my behalf." She hugged it to her chest, "Tell me how you managed it."
He smiled, content with the way she cherished the book. "I admit that I wrote a letter to your father, asking for the book. I was sent ripped pages in return-"
He faltered at the way her face fell.
"-But," he continued, "I sent the pages off to three well-read men and promised them anything to the man who found the novel it belonged to. It took a while, and I feared I would not have it in time, but alas, one of them found it. And here it is."
"What did he wish for?"
He frowned slightly, "Don't fret over that. Just know that it is all handled accordingly."
She pulled it from her chest to look at it again to guarantee that it was indeed real. "You are the most spectacular man I've met." She looked up at him. "I don't know what I have done to deserve you, but I shall spend my entire life thanking the gods for you."
"It is only a novel, my girl."
"It is much more than a novel."
"Then you'd hate to see what else I'd get you to only see a smile come to your lips."
She leaned over to him again as before, "May I kiss you?"
"Of course," he smiled. 
She grinned and pushed herself into his lap completely, pulling her body as close to his as she could, careful to not hit him with the book still in her hand. 
She finally connected their lips with a heavier intent than they had shared before.
He groaned against her and wrapped his arms around her.
"I'm certain," she panted against his lips, "I love you."
"My girl, I've loved you since the moment you arrived in Winterfell."
She pulled away from him completely. "W… What?"
"Since that day," he said as he brushed his thumb over her cheek. "I've been quite sure that I love you."
"You feel warmth when you are with me?"
"When I see you, I want to keep you beside me. I want to hold and kiss you until you're dizzy. I want to watch you sit and read until you become one with the sofa," he chuckled, "I want to see your joy as much as I can. I want you."
"You're unlike any man I know."
"That's alright. Isn't it?"
She chuckled as full relief flowed from her, as if only now accepting that she was safe here. "What a silly question, my lord."
He tilted his head playfully. "My lord?"
"It was my attempt at a jest," she admitted sheepishly. "Was it a poor one?"
"No," he countered. "I was just not expecting it from my meek wife. Perhaps she is not as meek as I once thought."
She laughed again, "Perhaps. We'll see, won't we?"
He kissed her cheek, "I cannot wait." He spoke in her ear, "But for now, be gone. You have a novel to read, don't you?"
Her eyes lit up and she clambered out of his lap. "I do! Oh, I do!"
Cregan watched the woman run to the cloth chair by the fireplace and sit, pulling her book open in a rush to absorb its words.
He chuckled and stood as he began to dress, "I'll fetch you for dinner. There's breakfast on the table from earlier. I expect you'll be content until then," he teased.
She looked up and nodded, "I will."
"Read closely. I expect to hear a summary at dinner of whatever chapters you consume."
She grinned from ear to ear as he left.
………………………………………………….
Taglist: @twinkletwinklenotastar, @kidd3ath,@yujyujj, @misswynters, @cosmosnkaz, @sithapprentice, @kaniromi, @lovemesomevesey, @its-jackie-bb, @8812-342, @thorins-queen-of-erebor, @kingdomzeldaquest @nyxbranwenn, @callsignwidow, @a1lexh-blog, @alyssa-dayne, @ethereal-athalia, @ashovertheriver,
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authorred · 2 days
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Frostbitten | Li Shen/Zayne x reader | Love and Deepspace
[Masterlist]
➺ Preface: Taking a trip with Zayne up to the snowy mountains was something you were looking forward to. Spending time with him and taking a break from your busy schedules are what you both need. But halfway through your trip, the aether core in your heart acts up, and your weakened heart begins to give.
➺ I was inspired by the one scene in Zayne's branched route trailer where he runs up to MC and carries her when she collapses TEEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE IT'S SO HOT SEEING MEN WORRY LIKE THAT HOOOYYY MMMMYYYYY GAAAWWWOOUUURRRDDDDDD
Warning(s): As angsty as I can make it. You almost die, good luck
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As you step off of the train and onto the slightly snowy platform, you stretch your limbs and take in a deep breath. “Ah, finally,” you sigh in relief. “It’s no fun being cramped in a booth seat for three hours with nothing to do.”
Zayne comes up behind you wordlessly, carrying the few bags you brought with you on the trip. “Impatient as always,” he says. “Like a child.”
“I should’ve brought my laptop but I decided not to in the moment,” you sigh again. “I should’ve brought it for the actual travel time. Now I feel restless.”
“There’s plenty of things to do while we’re here,” Zayne assures. “It’s a small village, but I’m confident that you’ll find something that piques your interest. It’s rather easy to do.”
You roll your eyes and grab a bag from Zayne’s arm to help him. “Yeah, yeah, okay. I get it. I have the attention span of a goldfish.”
“Not quite a goldfish. Perhaps a small dog or a bird.”
You playfully shove him and his body follows through, stumbling a step or two away. You know he could’ve resisted a bit more, easily, but where’s the fun in that? “Shut up and let’s go already. We got a cabin waiting for us.” With that, you begin to stalk off in the direction of the station exit. Zayne doesn’t say anything and trails behind you like a shadow.
~
The cabin is much nicer than you originally thought. A cozy lounge, a small kitchen and dining area, and a loft upstairs with only one bed ;). There’s a nice fireplace in front of the small sofa with firewood already sat inside of it. It smells slightly of the outside trees, wood, and some hints of smoke.
“Oh, this is nice,” you say, placing your bags on the floor in the foyer. “Cozy and warm. I wonder if the kitchen is filled.”
“Just like you to be thinking of food.”
“It’s getting close to lunch—can you blame me?” You throw him a look over your shoulder before bouncing into the small, but homey kitchen. After inspecting all the cabinets and the small refrigerator you can see some left over nonperishables, bottles of water, pots and pans, and other miscellaneous items. “Mm, seems we’ll have to go into town if we want to actually eat food,” you say. “I’m glad it’s not that far from here.”
Zayne joins you in the kitchen and glances around. “It certainly is quaint,” he says. “Not bad.”
~
After an hour you and Zayne manage to make a small lunch just enough to tide you over. Afterwards you were planning to walk to the town store to buy more groceries for a proper dinner.
Halfway through your small lunch, you pause your eating. You take a moment, shifting and adjusting your body, rolling your shoulders out. You feel an uncomfortable feeling in your chest—as if the muscles are contracting. It’s a small point of discomfort but one you can’t ignore.
Zayne eyes you curiously, giving you a moment to assess whatever it is that’s wrong. After a few seconds of slight discomfort on your face he asks, “Are you alright?”
“Yeah,” you reply. “Just a weird feeling is all. Maybe I haven’t stretched enough. It feels like a cramp.”
“Where?”
“My chest.” You subconsciously rub where there’s pain, your fingers gently massaging into the skin above your heart. Immediately, Zayne’s face drops in concern.
“Do you have pain in your jaw or left arm? Do you feel tired? Nauseous?”
“What?” You blink at him. “No. It feels like a cramp. I probably didn’t stretch enough after my shift yesterday.”
Zayne doesn’t relax, though he takes your word for it. “I see,” he replies quietly. “Stretching after strenuous exercise is important in keeping muscles from straining or tearing. And to reduce soreness. Please make sure to do it whenever you can.”
You nod, the pain fading, but never disappearing. “I know. I will. After this I’ll do a few stretches and see if it helps.”
~
Despite your earlier complaint of having chest pain, you still insisted on taking a walk to the town store. Zayne was hesitant, preferring to do it himself or to make sure you’re okay. But your insistence won out, and now you two are traipsing down a beautiful snowy trail to the town.
“It’s so beautiful here,” you say. “Cold, but beautiful. Snowy mountains and terrain are always so picturesque.”
Zayne hums in agreement and looks around at the surrounding area before turning his head to look at you, who’s admiring the distant mountains. His gaze is uncharacteristically soft. “Some things truly are beautiful no matter what.”
You let out a chuckle and nod, still unaware of his eyes on you. “Yeah, it is.”
Halfway through your walk, you start to slow. You pause, taking a moment to breathe. It’s hard to breathe. Like you can’t catch your breath. Every time you attempt to take a deep inhale it’s like your body is stopping you. Dread wells up inside of you but youl try to calm yourself down. The pain in your chest that never fully stopped blooms again, and your face scrunches up in slight discomfort. You take a step back, attemping to collect yourself from the sudden slap of lightheadedness that just hit you.
Zayne stops a few feet away from you and turns, his face scrunching up in concern. “What’s wrong?”
“Zayne, I don’t feel good. . .” You start to stumble, and Zayne immediately strides over to you. You reach your hand out to which he grasps tightly. He cradles your cheek in his other hand and looks down at you. His eyes flit over your face, taking in your expression and current physical condition. Your complexion is completely off, and you’re on the verge of losing consciousness. Your vision is blurry and you can make out his face through the lightheaded haze. Your chest hurts a lot.
Without a word, Zayne picks you up bridal style and begins to march back to the cabin. His brows are furrowed in determination and worry, lips pressed in a thin line. He’s not dumb. He knows what it is—it’s your heart. Most likely cardiac arrest from all the issues you have regarding it. He needs to get you medical attention—immediately. If he doesn’t, then—
Zayne shakes his head, clearing it of any unnecessary thought. His focus is making sure you’re okay. His steps are driven forward with the single thought of keeping you alive; heavy and steady. The nearest hospital to the cabin is close to 40 minutes away. He prays to whatever god there is to keep you from death in that time.
“Zayne,” you rasp out, your vision beginning to grow bright and contrasting. “My heart hurts.”
“I know,” Zayne replies softly, walking up the wooden porch of the cabin. “Hang on. Everything will be okay.”
You don’t realize you fall unconscious until the sense of impending doom vanishes.
~
Everything that could go wrong did go wrong. The aether core in your heart destabilized and that caused your heart to give. Fluctuations of your evol forced your body to become unstable, and therefore unpredictable. Zayne managed to contact help but by the time it arrived your body was under so much stress from your heart growing weak, that it became borderline dangerous to perform any intervention on you.
Zayne is but a cardiologist. As brilliant as he is, this is not something within his realm. He knows about Protocore Syndrome and how it can affect the body and the cardiovascular system, but never before has it evolved in turning you into an unstable core yourself.
They had no choice but to intubate and isolate you. Specialists who had an idea of what’s going on said you very well could be a ticking time bomb (you can imagine how that went over with Zayne). Your body pulses and glows, following the veins in your flesh and circling around your heart like koi fish. It would be beautiful, if not for the fact you could possibly explode in a flux of evol so strong you could level the area.
Zayne watches from the observation mezzanine, his brows tightly knit together. He can feel his ice begin to spread across his neck and shoulders, the feeling a burning cold that forces him to look away from you. Taking a few deep breaths, he forces the ice to recede. It hurts. It always does. But he can’t help it. He can’t stop.
His eyes slowly slide back over to you. He knew he should’ve pushed you to take care of yourself more—or done it himself. Why didn’t he do it? Why do you never listen? He knew your heart wasn’t strong to begin with and yet you became a Hunter, go on dangerous missions, ignore instructions. . . something has to be wrong. There has to be a disconnect.
Is it him? Is he too cold? Too detached? If you die—
If you die. . . what then?
Zayne stands there for a moment before turning his head and walking from the observation window. He has a meeting to attend to; one that will decide on how to proceed with this issue. On how to care for you.
His Hunter will not die. Not under his care. Not while he’s alive.
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anomaly-hivemind · 3 days
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We’ll meet again || Double penetration in one hole and public w/ Bill cipher x fem reader
Word Count: 1993
Masterlist
Tag: Double penetration in one hole, vaginal sex, Exhibitionism, public, Overstimulation, dubcon
Note: The reader is slightly black-coded. Nickname is Dimples or honey lips
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You got a full time job at this mystery shack in the middle of the forest. You had been working there for maybe a total of three months with little to no issues, until it became the start of the summer. Then came two young kids and all the oddities that seem to have started when they got there. Staying with their Grunkle which was also your boss, you got to know everyone well.
“Hey Y/N do you mind watching over the shack for me for a few hours, I’m taking Mable and Dipper out for a bit” Stan said while already basically out the door so you just nod. It was a long slow hour of nothingness, maybe an old lady or two but nothing interesting to make you pay attention to anything.
“So one save me from this boredom,” You groan and rub your forehead. You could only play with pens and paper clips for so long. You heard a ring and turned to face the door, but there wasn’t anyone around as far as you could tell.
“I’ve only seen you around recently how fun” A voice behind you makes you turn to it with wide eyes and you lean against the register. A guy who didn't really seem all there was standing behind the counter with you. ‘Where did this bum come from, how the fuck did he get behind you in th first place.’ You thought with a panic as you looked at the unnatural yellow glow in his eyes and felt like he was peering into your soul nonconsensually might you add.
“Sir you can’t be behind the counter” You try to keep a kind voice in hope to not upset the potential crackhead that had wandered into the mystery slack.
“BuUt I came to answer your pleas of boredom dimples. definitely not to find something of importance. ” He spoke dramatically before mumbling something under his breath.
“My what now.. Sir please just set back into being in front of the counter.” Instead of doing what you asked, he took a step closer and unfortunately for you that ass of yours was not moving any closer to the register than you already were.
He moved his arms on both sides of you and smiled an uncanny smile that made you shiver. Next thing you know you are moving onto the counter to escape his attempt to trap you. Like hell were you gonna get murdered by some random probably drunk stranger for drug money. You liked it here but not enough to get yourself killed and mutilated for it.
“That tremble of yours is pretty cute Honey lips, filling my head with all kinds of things.” you make a run to the door but before you could open it the yellow eyed guy stood in front of the door blocking the fastest exit out.
The room felt cold and shaped all of sudden and you felt like you were a deer in headlights. You couldn't move anything but move your head which is what tipped you off that this was no normal paralysis.
“What the hell did you do to me!” You yelled at him in a concerned voice. The guy uses your stuck body to lean against your shoulder.
“You have a pleasing meatsuit Dimples.” he whispered in your ear.
“Who are you? What do you want from me?!” your voice got shaky as you tried to keep the confidence you definitely didn’t have right now.
“Name’s Bill! But you can call me your new lord and master for all of eternity!” The guy’s body drops to the ground in front of you and out comes a bright yellow triangle with one eye and a top hat pops up in his place floating around. “Oh so i’m tripping balls right now, inhaling the wrong type of air that's what going on right now.”
“I am very real despite what that simple brain of yours thinks.” he rolls his eye at you as he flies around you in a close circle.
“You are nuts.” you shake your head, who would have thought that your mundane need to cure your boredom would lead to… well whatever this was right now.
“Well it's not my fault your corrupt mind brought my attention, so what was it you wanted Dimples.” you don't answer so he speaks again.
“Entertainment was it, well honey lips consider me willing to entertain…But in exchange you gotta entertain me.”
“How would i do that” you felt dumb even entertaining this Dorito thing.
“How ‘bout I reverse the functions of every hole on your face.” his eyes smiled or so that's what you think his face was doin at least.
“How about no.”
“No fun boo, mhm how about something we both can enjoy” He had his hand in front of his face where his chin would have had if he wasn’t, well if he wasn’t a triangle.
“Like what?”
“You'll just have to take the chance and Trust me.” There was a slight giggled that came from his lip face. his hand lit up in a blue fire and you realized you could move again.
“But why are you doing this?” you tried to ask but he only gives you a cryptic answer.
“Boredom is my worst enemy, so I'm here to save you,” he said loudly.
You were definitely going to regret this lapse in judgment you were about to have. You raised your hand and shook the demon's hand with great hesitation. ‘Was I fucking stupid, i gotta be brain dead to shake the hand of a demon who gave me vague information of his probably dangerous arrangement i agreed to already. Sign my life way I guess.’
He snapped his fingers and your clothes were gone, you let out a shrill as you covered the important bits the best you could.
“No amount of gold on earth can buy originality…but you're come close enough.” Move your arms away.
You felt very exposed, you were naked in your work space in front of this triangle being of unknown origins. You were in the middle of the room and anybody could come inside the place, hell Stan and the kids could come back at any time then next thing you know it you’re a register offender. You could only hope that what this chip shaped man demon thing had in planned for you wouldn’t last that long.
In a flash Bill grows a body and keeps his triangle head that has changed into a pyramid. He was also equally as naked as you are, Plus he looked Hot to add to it. You look him up and down but your eyes get stuck on a thing well two things actually. Two dark cocks that were long and thick at his base, erect and twitching. You were staring at them and you were drooling a bit. It was embarrassing.
“This form pique your interest?” He stroked himself slowly as if he was giving a show for you. You don’t catch yourself nodding to his question and before you know it he is up against you, dick touching you everytime he curves it in a stroke. He moved you closer to the counter, your bare ass touching the desk.
“Let's get started, Honey lips.” he rubbed the tips over your fold and let out a funny happy sounding noise.
“So wet already~ who would have thought you could be so needy and wanting.” he pushed one of his veiny cocks into you, all the way to in until kissed it on your cervix. You let out a loud squeal like moan as you arched your back. There was no way you were going to cum, not from him just sliding into you…right.
“Feel free to cum at any time, I'm super giving Dimples.” he started to move his hips, your pussy regards no shame as it makes wet squelches as he tickles your g-spot. Your hole sucking in him it's making you feel like a slut.
“Fuckin… Ah~” you feel your legs start to shake from his mean pace inside of you. Bill starts to push his other cockhead and you clench around them. You cum around them as soon as he pushes the other one all the way inside as well. Stretching you out like never before, it felt like you were touching stars.
You have no time to recover from his movement because he doesn't stop, letting out a groan and mumbling to himself about how snug your pussy felt around him. Your ears burn as he teases you for cumming so fast and mentioning how he was just getting started with you. He starts to push almost all the way out before ramming back into out then repeating. Your eyes start to water as you reach another climax right after the other.
“You are mighty easy to please Honey lips.” he groaned and pushed you over on the counter, you were now laying back on the cold desk in a daze as he held your legs up at his waist. Your walls flutter around the girth of the two dicks of his inside of you.
“I can’t take it!” you whine as you feel an orgasm number who knows you're not keeping track start to approach you.
“Limits only exist in the mind.” Bill rolled his hips at an odd angle that it was almost like his dicks were moving at different times. He gives a squeeze to your breast and you shiver.
He kept moving his hips in this devious way that was starting to make you spasm and moan. Bill moved his hand down your body and he started to play and tease your clit, the whole action makes you choke out a cry as you feel a pool of wet hit yours and his thighs. ‘Did I just?!’
“YOU DID?” He answers your thoughts with an overly happy tone that was embarrassing. He kept thrusting his hips into you and circling your clit and you impulse your legs shut. You didn't think you could cum anymore but this DEMON has proved that to not be true in the slightless.
“Can you try not to lose consciousness, it won't make me stop.” He spoke through breathy groans. Bill’s words make you clench around you again, you could see the specks of darkness forming in your vision but you try to shake them off.
He slammed his hips into you at a breathtaking pace, his was slower and harder and it literally took your breath out of your lungs with each thrust. You could feel him twitching in you, a dead give away that he was close to coming. His pace brought you back to another painful yet pleasuring orgasm, his hand went back to your clit to run a slow tight pattern on you.
His hips sputter and he comes in heavy thick ropes of cum, filling you up like a pie. Pools of his seed dripped out of you when he pulled out of you a bit too fast for comfort. You let out a quick whine.
“Your a fun time Dimples, really know how to keep up with me.” he changed back to his triangle form. You try to get up but the sudden movements make your ears ring and thighs send you any single they can. You look up at Dorito demon as he watches you struggle a bit.
“We’ll meet again, Honey lips.” his eye curls as his way of a smile, then he poofed out of nowhere.
Now you need to get some clothes before anyone sees you like this…And to wipe the cameras.
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honestlynervousnut · 2 days
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✍️ tattoo for salbucktommy please :D
• Ficlet Friday Saturday•
Buck was lying in bed taking a nap. After days of intensive work under Gerrard's command, he was exhausted and taking the nap of his life, or at least he was until he felt something small and pointed being slowly dragged over his left shoulder.
As he slowly woke up he began to hear whispers, it was Sal and Tommy.
''Seriously?'' Asked Sal ''Out of all the stuff you could be doing you're doing that?''
''Shut the fuck up Salvatore and don't distract me'' Whispered Tommy back ''You can do whatever you want with him when it's your turn.''
''Yeah....sure...'' Said Sal with sarcasm.
''What the-?'' When he fully woke up he saw Tommy with what it looked like a pen and Sal holding his arm on place, once everything set in he jumped like a gazelle making both Sal and Tommy fall on the bed.
''What are you doing?!'' He asked acusatory.
''N-nothiiiing....'' Said Sal and Tommy at unison with the most nervous smile they ever made.
''Wha...?'' Buck tried to see what he had on the shoulder but he couldn't see it clearly so he got up and went to the bathroom to look at himself on the mirror.
''Ev-Evan Evan Evan nonononono!'' Tommy called him as he got up from the bed ''Evan no I-Im not- its not finished!'' He chuckled and both him and Sal followed Buck to the bathroom.
Buck walked into the bathroom thinking those two little shits had drawn a dick or something rude on him, but he was But he was pleasantly surprised when he saw a rather detailed flower on his left shoulder.
As he looked at the drawing, Sal and Tommy emerged from behind him like ''🥺'' and Buck looked at them.
''Wh....whyy?'' He asked slightly sleepy and confused
''We were bored....'' Said Tommy with a hint of smile on his face.
''And your arm looked rather empty'' Said Sal holding back a chuckle and playing with the pen on his hands.
''Do you like it?'' Asked Tommy with puppy eyes.
''God how I love this two'' That's all Buck could think. He looked at the reflection of the tattoo and then at Tommy.
''I-I-I....its...its not bad'' Muttered Buck as he got out of the bathroom trying to hide his pink-ish cheeks.
|Two days later|
Sal and Tommy were on the couch watching TV when Buck walked in and stood in front of them.
''Hi honey!'' Greeted Tommy with a smile ''Hey Beautiful'' Greeted Sal with a smile as well.
''Hey guys'' Said Buck ''Is everything okay?'' Asked Tommy
''Yeah....yeah um....I have a surprise...'' He said smiling. Sal turned off the TV and both man looked at him with interest.
Buck took off his jacket showing them a tattoo version of the flower that Tommy drew.
Both men looked at him in awe.
''Oh hell yeah!'' Said Sal surprised. ''No way!'' Said Tommy with a big smile.
Buck just laughed. ''Y' like it? I thought that you guys were right, my arm did look empty...''
''Oh absolutly'' Nodded Sal ''It looks way better now...'' Tommy said.
Buck smiled and got closer to the couch, then he grabbed both Sal's and Tommy's chin and looked at them with fondness.
''Y'know, maybe I should let both of you draw more of my tattoes''
Sal and Tommy looked at each other and then smirk.
''Can we?'' Tommy asked with a small smile ''Yeah good question, can we?'' Sal asked with a big grin.
Buck chuckled.
''Of course....but no dicks Sal...''
Tommy chuckled as Sal rolled his eyes.
''Fair enough....'' Sal smiled.
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whatprince · 5 months
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How do you choose your shapes and colors, and how do you get cool ideas? Ive been having a hard time only being able to draw straightforward and simple stuff, i dont know how to get cool ideas anymore
umm i dunno! dont really know what you mean by cool either. i dont feel like ive done anything particularly "cool" in anything ive posted here yet but thank you
i choose shapes and colours by being lazy. as a rule i dont sketch before drawing something because otherwise i get bored. so my shapes are just what come naturally. i like simplifying and dont like realism so i dont do it. im not good with colours so i keep them flat and bright. homestuck makes that really easy cause everyones got a colour u dont really need to think about it. i like red so i use it a lot
as for cool ideas um i dunno. just get bored and go insane about something. if you get an idea dont get scared of it. if u think u cant pull it off just go for it anyways. see it thru. dont fall back onto the safety net of drawing simple stuff cause youll just build the habit and get urself more stuck. draw something bad and never show anyone if you hate it but dont let that stop u from drawing it in the first place
or do whatever you want i dont know. this advice is kinda shit
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buttercupshands · 3 months
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I just managed to get off mha hyperfixation
And now it's happening again... Oh no
Helps with upcoming MHUI LoV event tho, it was a long time since last one happened I wonder what would happen in a new filler story part
Basically this and couple of pages of mid-final arc chapters + recent episode and next one being The Dabi episode was just too much not to get excited again
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But! Important thing - I need to reread the last arc before I make anything new, if possible without finishing it to the 419 chapter and everything after, it took 2 months to really recover from the damage that chapter did
Anyway am I ready for the new event? Kinda! Do I have enough gems to get new Tomura? No! I'm not sure he'll even show up this time, because other ones were and still are really stubborn
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Also Steampunk recruit took like 120 pulls in a step-up recruit and in the usual one combined
Not the best time to get LoV involved, it's cruel even
Also that one part of the page I added at the beginning was so interesting to look at and them I joked about 236 being similar. The only good thing with final arc being over is that I can say that Izuku didn't draw the parallel of seeing everyone hurt and seeing Tenko react on Mon's death
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Understandable why, but it's funny to just look at them and be like, "wow Horikoshi traumatized them both"
#bnha#mhui#morning thoughts#not art#tenko shimura#shigaraki tomura#izuku midoriya#midoriya izuku#Still trying to assure myself that it's okay to tag whatever with whatever#If I get into drawing Izuku and Tenko interacting again this post is why#I don't prefer shipping stuff aside from here and there but some of the relationships are so interesting to look at#Izuku and Tenko one is one of my favorites and when PLF arc ended with Izuku looking behind who Tomura was on the outside was...#I can't describe it because I was SURE it was never happening and then it did and almost 3 years after that we get the actual thing#And then boom it's over#I thing knowing that AFO shows up in the 418 ruined it for me I saw people trying to predict it and stuff#But I hoped it wasn't gonna happen but I didn't know what would the other option be#So I was in 'we'll see' mindset for months and I'm okay with the end result... Kinda#It hurts really badly if I turn to my actual emotions#I was just thinking one day and while reading stuff decided to punch a pillow and suddenly it's like some wall broke and it hurt#It hurts now too actually just writing this#I thought because I wasn't processing this the way most people I saw in the fandom did with all of the hating on Horikoshi and stuff#AND hating on Izuku too!#I was either broken or a strange one even to the part of the fandom I tried to join for the first time in ages#While people were clinging to anything to keep deluding themselves that Tomura is alive#Or being openly angry on Twitter#It all was on Twitter actually because I have no power to really change what it shows if I don't just “ignore” every single person there#I tried drawing through it but I slowly hit burnout with drawing absolutely nothing#I'm a bit better now and I tried different things instead so it's alright still a bit... Too much all at once since I had irl stuff too#I'm glad that I'm not known enough to be pressured about anything since I pressure myself enough already
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Recent game related things .. hrmm...
#I do like the inconsistency of the first map. that is actually something older but that I re-found and added to my Game Reference stuff#so that when characters reference where they're from I can be accurate. I like that the whole map is kind of shifted up that way. Where the#actual south part doesnt even count as the south since its Too Far and Scary lol. and if you say you're from 'the north' thats basically#like.. one single continent. Though some people do make distinctions like 'north midlands' or etc. still. I like the ways that common#language isn't always precisely accurate like that. and thinking about why a culture would classify things a certain way or etc. etc.#The inventory page is so funny to me because it's literally just the BASe like.. sample layout just to make sure it works properly with 0#actual design into it. just colored rectangles thrown together in MS paint. but what if I like... left it like that.. what if all the other#art in the game and UI is like stylized and fully matching BUT the inventory/journal/etc. screens I just left as plain colored blocks#with random misalignments and black spots and etc gjhbhjj... It looks unfinished in a Funny Contrast way to me.#the wordcounts are just like... my past few days of writing.. I am still not getting 2200 words a day done or whatever I needed. I'm lucky#if it's even half of that .... tee hee.. :3c I do also keep having appointments and other things going on but..grrr...#The full map of the area is probably not necessary but I thought it would be more realisitc if people were able to reference things. Like i#you have people all living in a city area probably at some point someone might mention a neighboring city or some landmark nearby#or etc. so I thought having at least the basic names of what's around for reference would be sensible. A side character mentioning#'oh yeah I don't live here full time I just travel from Marisene sometimes' or whatever makes it seem more like a Real#Fleshed Out Place than people just making vague references like 'the river' or 'i come from a city nearby' or 'i went to a place somewhere#around here' or 'the other city' or etc. lol.. Especially since global cities/global areas are weird as they operate almost like an#independent country within their walls. so it's like a micro country inside of another country usually. just plopped down in some agreed#upon plot of land that won't be too disruptive to the main country around it. That could get very complex depending on the cultural and#political backdrop of where they're placed (though obviously they try to choose the 'easiest' areas possible for it). Asen is a very mild#country without much history of conflict or anything so it's fine. But still interesting that Sifeh and the entire branched out global area#border three other districts of Asen. Which means like 3 times the local representitives you'l have to negotiate with for some major change#or anything. I think one of the 'random characters you can find around the world and have short discussions with just to make the area#feel more populated and real even though theyre not actual important npcs' is going to be a guy who actually serves on the council that#handles running the global areas and he's like.. some perpetually exhausted middle aged elf running around with a clipboard or whatever#ANYWAY...... hrgh... still trying to write when I can....#I WISH so badly that I had the scope for a simple character creation menu and all character interactions would allot for the background#of your player character. And also to have a simple day night cycle where places in the world you explore/people you talk to during the day#have new options or dialogue at night.. BUT alas... I already am so behind on everything as is lol.. aughhh... T o T#As the worlds number one Needless Detail And Complexity Enjoyer i must dilligently prevent myself from adding additional complexity
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cold-neon-ocean · 7 months
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2, 9 for LOK?
✨ love your fandom ask game ✨ 
2. A headcanon you weren't sure about at first but have come to like!
Ooh this one is kinda tough~ I'm generally rather removed from the fandom at large so I actually don't really know of a lot of popular headcanons out there, let alone ones I initially didn't like and came to like~ I really only ever consumed content about Baatar and Kuvira as they're my favorites, and with them I'd either like a headcanon outright, or dislike it outright. I will say, at least in the limited fan content I've consumed, there is a common idea of Baatar having gone to university in Ba Sing Se for a period of time. I've seen at least 3 folks use that in their writings for him, and while it was never something I was "unsure" about, I didn't initially include the idea in my version of him. I don't know who penned that headcanon first but I was always hesitant about being seen as "copying" anyone lol. I do like the idea though, especially with my very codependent versions of Baatar and Kuvira, some time apart like that during their "good years" would be rather interesting, since they have been in each other's lives for most of their lives, Baatar choosing to go where Kuvira can't follow- even for a short period of time, I can see her holding against him for a little while. Especially with her preexisting abandonment issues.
9. A ship that isn't your OTP but you enjoy
Once again I'm pretty singularly invested in Baatar and Kuvira but there are definitely some canon and fan ships that I like! Canon wise I'll always have a soft spot for Bolin and Opal, just because they're cute and I like the potential dynamic it creates with Baatar specifically. A lot of it is pretty contingent on my rewrite versions, but what can I say, I'm a bit of a sucker for puppy love. Lyn and Kya was an early ship I'd see in the fandom that I always was like *Kermit nodding gif* ooh yeah I like that, and I've also seen Lyn and Bumi which I also really like, but I never really delved into fan works of either admittedly. I'll confess that lately the crack ship of Baatar and Zhu Li has been on my mind, but definitely not as a positive ship in any way, more like a mutually waged psychological warfare that they aren't even trying to hide from each other kind. I don't remember what sparked the idea- I'm not usually one for crack ships as I tend to be pretty single-ship through and through, but it's been a fun dynamic to think about, especially the kinds of conversations they'd have.
#Ask Matsu#LoK Thoughts#[ The Baatar/Zhu Li thing is something I'd love to play with but it definitely would not be canon to my main AU lol#as fun as that would be Baatar does not expend any more energy on people than he needs to save for Kuvira and to a lesser extent Bolin#But the idea of him and Zhu Li waging war with each other behind the scenes is very interesting to me#especially with her really just trying to get information she can use against them out of him#and he's fully aware of that and just letting whatever happens happen to both see how far she'll take it but also to keep the leash drawn#in the event she actually choses to do something drastic#also for the sake of clarity Kuvira would be 100% fully aware and find it entertaining on a number of levels#her and Baatar do not keep secrets#she was probably the one to be like “lol you should see where that's going”#though I do think Baatar and Zhu Li would have some very interesting conversations#they're in very similar positions and I'm sure he'd wanna know why she put up with Varrick for so long#i mean he'd have a good guess but he'd wanna hear what her rationale is in her own words#and on Zhu Li's part she wants to know what twisted Baatar up so bad#but she'd also find a lot of his viewpoints about being a non bender rather gratifying#because he's willing to say out loud what a lot of people don't want to hear#I didn't meant to go on about that singular aspect lol but it's something I've been thinking about a lot lately#and crack-ships are rather new for me so this is uncharted territory#does this even count as a crack ship tho? maybe not#it definitely started out as “hehe the two glasses people on the train” but now it's like “hehe psychological warfare”#idk maybe it still counts lol ]#orangepanic
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Tbh I have that he/they swag
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uh wld u guys think i'm cringe if i tagged my posts um i guess strategically? like with the intention of making them "found"
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area51-escapee · 3 months
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Happy pride and also I love you fellow sex-repulsed aces specifically for being the first people to ever make me feel like I wasn’t wrong for how I felt
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inkykeiji · 6 months
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Totally random question, what types of live action shows/movies do you like? I can’t for the life of me get into anime even though I really want to, I feel like I can’t relate to any of your interests and I want to so bad because you seem so cool :((
aw anon!!! you’re so sweet!!! (〃ノωノ) well i absolutely love film, like so so so so so much. i don’t watch too many shows, but i really love stranger things and i enjoyed the first season of house of the dragon! OH OH I LOVE TWIN PEAKS!! i also really enjoyed mad men and loved atlanta! we also just finished alice in borderland like a month ago, which is a live action anime adaptation so i’m not sure how much you’d be into it, but i thought it was quite well done!!
in terms of movies, i could talk your ear off forever so i will just say i love the work of wes anderson, quentin tarantino, stanley kubrick, david lynch, alfred hitchcock and greta gerwig. also a massive fan of mafia movies (the godfather, goodfellas, etc) and golden age hollywood cinema. horror is my all-time favourite genre, especially slashers of the 1970s-1980s (halloween!!!). in terms of popular franchises, star wars will always have a very special place in my heart (+ batman too!)
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addelaidesupreme · 7 months
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I'm watching a video essay about a game ive been interested in playing. The creator of the video, who has crossdressed multiple times, makes a "women arent funny" joke, and i suddenly realize ive never witnessed him acknowledge a woman in an uplifting way before.
I'm on a dating app for lgbt+ people. I've stated multiple times on my profile that i would rather lose an arm than recieve nudes without consent. I will be sent five dick pics for every 2 people i talk to that night.
I'm talking with my dad, who informs me he's been trying his best to learn about trans issues. He says the same things steven crowder brings up when trying to ridicule trans people. I gently but firmly correct my father and get told that ive been fed propaganda.
I'm on instagram, under the comments of a post ridiculing someone for being a misogynyst. Someone's left a comment saying "it must be hard being a woman on the internet" and i respond "it is." I will have every aspect of my appearance scrutinized as a reminder that no matter how well i pass, it will never be enough for someone with bad intentions.
I'm back on that dating app for lgbt+ people. I'm messaged by an attractive looking person, but i can see their partner prominently displayed in all but their main photo, oftentimes striking what im sure they thought was a very intimidating pose. Their bio says "looking for a third for our anniversary." I know that even if I did feel up to it, the gruff partner wouldnt approve of me because i don't pass.
I'm at a job interview for a clothing store. I tell the gracefully-dressed woman interviewing me that ever since i began my transition, i've discovered an interest in fashion, and that this job would allow me to dip my toes into the industry in a safe way. I'm told that i've reduced womanhood to a stereotype, and i can tell by her tone that i lost any chance at the job the minute she realized i was trans.
I'm at the same hospital i got facial feminization surgery in, trying to figure out what's wrong with my bowels. When the person behind the desk gives me a wristband with my patient info on it, i notice a single, lonely, letter M. I ask a nurse in private why it would say that despite me having changed it nearly a year prior. They say they have no clue, and bring in paperwork for me to fill out and have it re-changed again.
I'm living with my mom at the time. I'm new to transitioning, and decide to try my hand at voice training. It feels a bit off, but otherwise im feeling neutral toward the whole thing. I try speaking in this new voice to my mom and she laughs. Now, when people ask if i intend to voice train, i find speaking at all difficult for minutes after.
I didnt have some sort of grand message to convey by this. I just had a thought and then that thought spiralled into whatever the hell this became. Some, okay most, might call it complaining; they are right to do so.
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ereh-emanresu-tresni · 10 months
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wtfforged · 4 months
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my campaign hiatus has gone on for too long so to cope ive combined my interests at their maximum potency and had some dnd-strawhats thoughts
thoughts in depth under read more... :)!
this is SO self indulgent. their designs literally did not change. but i am a firm believer that dnd doesnt have to be european high fantasy. and also one piece literally IS fantasy. no changes are necessary to fit into dnd. ive already imagined plenty of campaign/oneshot ideas inspired by one piece. so this was basically just an exercise of trying to replicate their canon abilities in dnd 5e as much as possible without totally homebrewing everything. well. aside from luffy. you just cant take away or change his stretching.
LUFFY: (human monk. drunken master subclass. outlander)
the only plain human of the crew to balance out with the fact that he still has rubber powers. obviously a monk. but drunken master subclass specifically because i think the flavor(not the fact that its about being a drunkard) and abilities both fit him really well. this line in the subclass' flavortext especially fits him: "A drunken master often enjoys playing the fool to bring gladness to the despondent or to demonstrate humility to the arrogant, but when battle is joined, the drunken master can be a maddening, masterful foe."
ZORO: (tiefling fighter. samurai subclass. bounty hunter)
a fighter with the samurai subclass is so very incredibly obvious... but i actually had a lot of fun geeking out while comparing the abilities to what he can do in canon; Fighting Spirit, Rapid Strike, and Strength Before Death especially! tiefling is also pretty on the nose for his demon pirate hunter shtick and asura form, but i thought he'd be really human-passing for a tiefling and theorized about his tail getting cut off at some point or another before joining the strawhats. initially wasnt gonna give him a feat, but i gave sanji a feat so i thought itd be unfair to not give him one as well, so sentinel fits the bill pretty well i think!
NAMI: (tabaxi rogue. arcane trickster subclass. criminal)
cat burglar -> full grown literal humanoid cat. this one is INCREDIBLY self indulgent... i love... cats... theres nothing deeper to this and no other reasoning. i took cat burglar and ran with it. can you tell that i love izutsumi dungeon meshi? rogue for the aforementioned burglar-ing as well, and the arcane trickster subclass for when she picks up climatact! the mage hand will be very useful for her pickpocketing. in the future as she levels up with timeskip, i can totally see her multiclassing into wizard as well! weather wizard!
USOPP: (lightfoot halfling artificer. artillerist subclass. urchin)
I HAD SO MUCH FUN THINKING ABOUT HIS CHARACTER SHEET. halfling's Naturally Stealthy ability lets him hide behind his crewmates since theyre (almost) all bigger than him, so its perfect for hiding behind zoro or sanji all the time. Lucky is also perfect for him, and I think Brave fits pretty well too when he puts on the sogeking mask. artillerist artificer is also very fun! tinkering and making magic items for his crew, and i think Eldritch Canon or Arcane Firearm could both be easily reflavored as kabuto or any of his inventions. for emphasizing his sniper-ness, the spell sniper feat was also necessary. i think hes my favorite of all the concepts. big ears and long nose combo is so cute to me.
SANJI: (half-elf monk. drunken master subclass. guild artisan (cook!))
race was mostly based on vibes i wont lie. squints. and that vinsmoke balogna or whatever too ig. but mostly vibes. along with the idea that i think a dwarf zeff raising him would be really funny and cute. monk is also obvious, and same subclass as luffy for mostly the same reasons. though the flavor fits him much less, i think the abilities still fit him perfectly, and this blurb specifically; "Your martial arts technique mixes combat training with the precision of a dancer." i really wanted to give him a different subclass from luffy, but i dislike all the other monk subclasses a lot and i found none of them fit him as well anyways, so to try and give them SOME differences, i gave him the crusher feat.
CHOPPER: (awakened deer(shifter statblock) cleric. life subclass. hermit)
this ones definitely a mouthful im sorry. awakened deer for obvious reasons, but due to magic instead of devil fruit stuff. when i was struggling with his race, i looked a lot at shifter because of his forms, but it occurred to me that itd be super cool if he could shift between all of the different shifter options instead of being stuck with just one to replicate his rumble balls. something like heavy point/guard point=beasthide, horn point/arm point(?maybe?)=longtooth, walk point/jumping point=swiftstride, and brain point=wildhunt. hed definitely need some kind of nerf though to balance out that homebrew... and cleric for class. duh.
ROBIN: (high elf wizard. order of scribes subclass. criminal)
robin is definitely the one i struggled the most with just because of her class. elf came pretty easily- shes very elegant and i think shed look cute with super long ears- and i landed on high elf instead of wood elf for the int-based abilities. i was really on the fence between sorcerer and wizard for her because i knew shed be a full spellcaster, but i didnt feel that any of the subclasses really fit her. i ended up going with wizard for order of the scribes since it focuses on texts and knowing everything. but also because robin with a flying talking sentient book would be crazy cool. it could also be similar to how she spawns mouths and eyes places to talk to or watch people. my "fuck it, why not. this would be rad. its my house" mindset kicked in with her i will admit. also the One with the Word ability made me cackle out loud when i read it. thats the funniest ability ever. anyways, i cant really think of a way to replicate her powers, but maybe we could just reflavor a bunch of spells to be her limbs or clutch; hold person, maximillian's earthen grasp, or evard's black tentacles. thatd probably work okay, and theres a handful of spells to replicate her ability to spawn eyes or mouths. unrelated, but i imagine nico olvia to be a drow. why? her hair is white. i am a simple man!
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peachpitfics · 4 months
Text
Guilty as Sin
Fandom: Bridgerton
Summary: Benedict Bridgerton asks you to accompany him to his private studio, to show you some of the art he's been working on. You find a little more than you were expecting.
Length: 3k
Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader
Content Warnings: Oral sex (female receiving), Penetrative sex, Unprotected sex.
a/n: find pt 2 here!
Bridgerton master list
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"Good evening, y/n," A proud voice echoed behind you, discovering your hiding spot in the darkest corner, admiring Lady Danbury's art to appear busy. You didn't bother to turn and greet him, he always seemed to find you at these social events, even if you weren't outwardly interested in him, he persisted. Benedict Bridgerton slid into the space next to you as if it were designed for him, cheekily scanning you face for a reaction.
You met at Lady Danbury's ball 3 seasons previous. Your brother was holding out hope for a match this season, ignoring your contentedness for your own company. Benedict had never shown any interest in any young lady - he did, however, find amusement in torturing you this way.
"Bridgerton," You barely mumbled a response, hoping he would find another to bother this evening. Yet there he remained, exchanging his attention for the painting you were looking at.
"There are far better paintings in this ballroom" He remarked, a little scoff sounding off.
"Yes, I am sure there are. However, this one is positioned perfectly" Still, you avoided eye contact and angled your body away from him. He was definitely not the same as the other Bridgerton men. Benedict was frivolous and artistic, lost in his own hedonistic world of luxury and pleasure. Perhaps it was jealousy that ruled your opinion of Benedict.
"Ah, yes. I truly have never seen a damp, dark corner without you in it, you know?" He chuckled, "Why do you pretend to be interested in art, when you could be watching whatever is unfolding behind you? I'm sure the numerous scandals and embarrassing events you would witness would be far more interesting" He asked, there was even a hint of genuine curiosity in his words.
You paused for a moment, contemplating even continuing this conversation or leaving to find your brother or mother.
"Actually, I rather enjoy art. I am more interested in sculpture or ceramics, but I will endure whatever I have to to get through this evening and every other evening like it this season" You spilled. Benedict was stunned, his eyebrows raised and his blinks steady in shock.
"I didn't know you had a like for such things" Benedict said serenely.
"Of course not, I am certain you thought my only interests were embroidery or pianoforte, like every other simpering mess in this ballroom" You thought your snarky remark was under your breath, but Benedict did manage to hear. He breathed a heady laugh through his nose and took a sip of his lemonade.
"Would you be interested in viewing some of my works?" Benedict pondered aloud, finally dragging your eyes to meet his. It seemed sincere - which was not something you often saw from him. Whilst he was a shameless flirt, you never indulged him like some of the other young ladies. It was obvious that he viewed you as some sort of challenge, but you would never give in.
"Is that a serious invitation?" You asked, taken aback.
"Yes, absolutely. Art is potentially the only thing I do take seriously. I would love to show you, if you would like to see it" He almost bowed, as if the pursuit of his art was the most noble thing about him. This shift in his personality made him less repulsive, it intrigued you. Turning to face him, for the first time in so many months, throwing off his balance slightly, you held your hand out for him to take.
"You would like to see it now?" His brow furrowed, eyes asking permission to take your hand and lead you out to the carriages.
"Why not? We've been to this ball numerous times before, it will not be getting any more interesting" With the softest of smiles decorating your normally sour face, Benedict took your hand and began walking outside with you, watching nervously as people ignored your presence.
"Will this not be damning to your marriage prospects?" Benedict leaned over to whisper in your ear, an element of concern riding along his words.
You gave him a pitiful smile, "What prospects?". Not a single soul noticed the two of you leaving the ball. Benedict held the carriage door open for you and held your hand as you stepped up into it.
"I've never slipped out of an event quite like that" He remarked, closing the door, sitting opposite you.
"Well, in truth, I thought perhaps someone might have stopped us, just because of you… But, I suppose, my power of invisibility is shared with the person I am escaping with" Your eyebrows flicked up. Benedict could not discern whether you were happy or not to fly out of the view of the ton. While it was a blessing most days, you were afforded your privacy and peace. Perfect silence. There were many other days filled with loneliness, the madness of having to hear your own voice in your head just to fill the quiet.
The carriage ride was slightly uncomfortable, the two of you had never had to be alone like this. You were delivered to Benedict's college where he had been studying art and he led you towards his private studio. Benedict's hand reached out for the door handle, stopping short, and spinning to look at you, back pressed against the door.
"I presume you understand I don't bring people here," He paused, his demeanour was soft and vulnerable, "Be gentle with me". He waited for acknowledgment on what he was saying, and with a nod of promise from you, he opened the door. You both walked inside in sweet silence as you took in the most beautiful sight. The room was littered with parchment, sketches, canvases. Drabs of colour, charcoal and lead lit only by low candlelight as Benedict struck the match. This was the most personal gesture of friendship you had ever experienced, it was like peering through window into Benedict Bridgerton's mind - a place he only has the keys to. Several desks were patterned around the room, a small platform in the centre of the room, drying racks on the far left. You were surprised by this unapologetically intimate space, and even more impressed by the immense talent you were witnessing.
"What are you working on currently?" You did not mean for the excitement of the room to fill you up so keenly. Benedict had such a hard time trying to read your reaction, your manner and tone were thrilling to him.
"Oh, please" He gestured towards a far table, where an easel stood facing the window, "I am learning about portraiture this semester. This is something I am doing for my youngest brother, Gregory, for his birthday" His hand sailed past your lower back, shuffling you both around. A deliciously electric pulse passed over your body, goose bumps erupting in a rolling wave quickly trailing behind.
"Benedict, this is incredible" You gasped, your hands covering your mouth with astonishment.
Oddly, he stepped back from you and placed his hand on his heart.
"What did I say?" You smiled uncomfortably.
His face softened, his eyes fluttering peacefully, "My name. That is the first time, you have ever said my name" A flash of teeth in his grin made your heart jump its next beat. There was a flush of embarrassment in your cheeks, your eyes flicked between Benedict's and the floor.
"I apologise" Admittedly, you had never given him a chance to show how utterly human he was. When he had asked you to come to the studio, you wondered whether the room would be filled to the brim of paintings of naked women. How wrong you were - finding yourself surrounded by paintings and scrawling's of every member of his family. You dug around, flicking through sketchbooks, diaries.
"Have you found a favourite?" He meandered around the room after you, hands tucked behind his back like a gentleman, observing.
"This one, is my favourite" You held up a side profile of Violet Bridgerton, done entirely in variants and shades of their family colours.
"I am yet to show her that one, do you think I should?" He asked, and you sensed he truly valued your opinion here.
"Yes! If I had half your talent, I would have filled my family's home with my work" You chuckled, laying the canvas down on the current desk you were visiting.
You moved around the other side of the room, noticing a section of the room more damp, and darkly lit, compared to the rest of the studio. There stood an easel with a large drape thrown over it, and several canvases stacked betwixt it and the wall. This struck a chord of curiosity in you that could not be contained, you almost dashed forward to pull the drape down.
"No! Wait, not those!" Benedict rasped, darting forward to try and stop you. It was too late, the cream-coloured drape had coiled to the floor and revealed what Benedict did not want you to see.
Brow furrowing, you stood back, taking in what you were seeing for the first time. Here, on the easel, an unfinished portrait, of you.
"That's -- That's private" Benedict cleared his throat uncomfortably.
"Is this… me?" You didn't know whether to be flattered, impressed, or worried. Had he done this from memory? That was when it occurred to you to look down. Picking up, and flicking through the canvases, they were all you. There were maybe six or seven of them, all in different poses, of differing angles. Had he taken such notice of you to be able to do this from memory? The detail in your face, your hair and even dresses you had worn in past seasons.
"This is…" You shook your head, placing the canvases back. Benedict stood behind you, leaving a distance so as not to make this more uncomfortable than it already was. His hands were pressed together at his lips as if he were praying, wearily hanging on for your next words.
"No one has ever seen me like this, or rather, at all" You sighed.
"I see you as you are" Benedict replied too quickly.
"And how is that?"
There was a long pause, an internal struggle between what he wanted to say and what he should.
"I see… the raw soulfulness of your gaze. The divine sway in your walk. The sensual ruthlessness of your words. The confidence of your acceptance. I have watched, and waited, and wallowed in avaricious longing" Benedict heaved in a deep breath, "Every line, every curve, every shade I fear is a figment of my imagination until I see you again, just so that I might commit a little more to memory".
Benedict's eye cast low, his discomposure becoming more and more apparent. You were not to know that the one person you had been avoiding for the past several seasons had been perceiving you exactly as you had always dreamed. Perhaps it was not Benedict's personality that made you keep him at arm’s length, but rather your own.
You bound forward, slightly tripping on your gown, throwing yourself in the second Bridgerton brother's arms. In the instant he caught you, you planted the shyest of kisses on his unsuspecting lips. Benedict chuckled sweetly, lifting you to stand on your own two feet again, wrapping his arms around your waist, pulling you into to a longer, more fervent kiss. His lips were much softer than you were anticipating, gentle and cool against your own. Benedict's tongue dipped into yours, his kiss still passionately intoxicating. You parted for a moment, both of you breathing a little heavier now. Benedict took a step back, straightening his dress clothes and composing himself.
"I apologise, miss y/n"
"Why do you apologise? I am the one who owes you" You stammered.
"I am just glad that no one saw us, I will not have you ruined. I will not be the one that ruins you" Benedict stumbled over his words, words filled with such consideration and respect for you and your standing in society.
Panting still, bosom heaving over the corset, you thought about what he was saying. You thought about your "prospects".
Taking one large step forward, pressing your body against his, you leaned up as if to kiss Mr Bridgerton's cheek goodbye.
"Ruin me" You breathed, begged, into his ear, hands wrapping around his neck, your breath hitching in your throat as Benedict swooped you into his arms, carrying you to the nearest desk. He placed your behind on the edge of the desk, moving to sweep every piece of art clattering to the floor before turning his attention back to you. Your legs wrapped around his thighs, his lips crashing into you, his tongue fiercely caressing yours. Much to Benedict's surprise, you slipped your arms out of your dress, pushing the fabric down around your hips.
Stunned and dramatic shock shot across his face as he looked upon your upper body in your corset. Benedict blinked furiously, as if trying to regain control of his sense.
"May I?" He took hold of the fabric around your waist, pulling it out from under you as you lifted yourself slightly, signalling a loud yes. Sitting in your undergarments, Benedict wrapped his arms around your body, expertly fiddling with the laces as you nodded fervently into his delectable kisses. You grinned into his mouth, feeling the corset loosen quickly – he had done this before. Your fingers fumbled along the seam of his pants, unfurling the tucked fabric of his dress shirt, fiddling with the buttons of his overcoat.
Benedict stopped, throwing his coat across the room and removing his dress shirt as frantically as possible. It took only seconds for his eyes to widen at your naked body, sitting on the desk before him.
"Holy God" He exhaled, lunging forward, thrusting his hand into your hair, pulling you into a devilish kiss. His hands curved under your behind, lifting you forward to the very edge of the table before falling to his knees before you as if you were divine, and he, a devout worshipper at the altar. Littering kisses down your inner thigh, his nose nestling into the soft nest of hair at your mound, he breathed heavily, groaning with pleasure. Benedict's tongue slipped between your folds, circling the most sensitive spot on your body, your hands sliding into his hair, pulling gently as his pace quickened and steadied in a repetitive manner. Never had you felt so safe and yet so powerful, holding Benedict's head in place between your thighs. Letting out soft, melodic moans, tangling your fingers amongst his hair, finding your hips having a mind of their own as they ground against him. The sheer coarseness of Benedict's dawning facial hair and the soft, warmth of his darting tongue were plenty enough to push your mind to the edge of the human experience. Your head turned dreamy, light, whilst your body convulsed and squeezed Benedict's head between your thighs.
Panting softly, Benedict remained, placing delicate kisses where his tongue had just performed. As your body relaxed into him again, Benedict appeared from the floor, kissing you again, to lay you backward on the table, your own sweetness on your tongue now. He stood before you, bare torso, undoing his dress pants. Excitement pulsed through you, propping yourself onto your elbows to watch. You had heard other ladies discuss this in the depths of their personal conversations but had never really learned anything from them. It was a topic of great interest.
Freeing himself before you, your enlarging eyes took in his length as he held himself in his hand. "Allow me?" Benedict looked down at you, sordid passion aflame in his eyes. You gave a clear, concise nod. Benedict moved closer between your thighs, adjusting your legs, and placing himself at your entrance. With both hands sprawled over the space between your belly and your hips, Benedict slowly pushed forward, eliciting guttural moans from your lips. But he never looked away from you, he never closed his eyes for more than a half-second. His desire burned out of him, his eyes searing down on you and in helplessness, you exuded wanton need in return.
You wished this act were eternal, completely unending. Every thrust an indiscreet attempt at conveying his affections for you. His hand found its way to caressing your cheek, his teeth nipping at your neck as you moaned his name.
“Benedict” You sighed without inhibition. The sound of your voice sent Benedict into a frenzy, his thrusts harder now and full-fledged. His sinful grunts, echoing across the studio, came to a hot, explicit apex as he buried himself as deeply as possible inside of you.
He looked down at you dreamily, his eyes heavy with pleasure, running his thumb over your bottom lip. Benedict stepped away, reaching for his dress pants, and sitting on to the ground in front of you – you moved to sit next to him, surrounded by the tables previous contents.
“You are wonderful. I could never capture such an essence, in any art form. You are transcendent” Benedict’s words were slow, the ruse of his silly exterior worn away.
“I much prefer this version of you” You gave a smug smile, both of you avoiding eye contact.
“As I do you” He retorted, chortling alongside you. The long, comfortable tired silence between you was broken only when Benedict cleared his throat.
“Y/n,” Benedict spoke up, “I think—No, I am quite certain, I love you” He admitted, holding his hand out, bridging the space between your mostly naked bodies, waiting for you to take it.
“I do believe I too am guilty of loving you” You responded, laying your hand gently in his. Leaning to meet in the middle, sharing a sentimental, sweet kiss and smiling into each other. Benedict jumped up, pants still undone around his waist, he pulled you to your feet.
“Come, I should like to draw you” He posed you naturally on the platform in the centre of the room. You watched him scramble about the room, looking for his implements.
“Like this!?” You gestured to yourself, completely nude on the dais.
“Yes, precisely like this” Benedict growled ardently, putting his pencil to his parchment.
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If you would like to be tagged in any upcoming Bridgerton fanfictions written by me, please let me know and I will add you to a taglist!
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