#nam-gyu x reader

[cybrasigilism]

hii love ur work!! 🫶🏼

can we get some fluff for namgyu🙏🏼 i love him smh

maybe a sfw alphabet or like some kind of boyfriend things!! ahah up to u ml take care xx

aww thank you so much! and yes i would love to do a SFW alphabet for nam-gyu 🙂‍↕️🙏

SFW Alphabet W/ Player 124 (Nam-gyu)

warnings: fluff | NOT PROOFREAD | lowercase intended | this is my interpretation of this character, please be respectful even if my opinion on the character differs from your own

character: nam-gyu (player 124)

A/N: a bit ashamed i haven’t written anything NOT freaky about this guy— it’s high time that changes ✋😒 (acting like i’m not gonna write something crazy later)

Enjoy!

A= Affection (how affectionate are they? how do they show affection?)

↳ nam-gyu is surprisingly affectionate for someone so….

we know’s got a thing for physical touch, so his way of showing affection is basically just hanging off you— when no one else is around. he won’t be affectionate in public, ever. he finds PDA super embarrassing

B= Best Friend (what would they be like as a best friend? how would the friendship start?)

↳ he would definitely be an apathetic type of best friend— who at the same time is the best person to have deep conversations with.

as for how the friendship starts, it would definitely be an unlikely bond formed through a mutual friend (cough cough su-bong cough cough)

C= Cuddles (do they like to cuddle? how would they cuddle?)

↳ as much as he won’t actually admit it, nam-gyu loves it when you smother your face into his chest when you guys cuddle. he usually lets you practically hang off him while he scrolls on his phone

however if he’s feeling extra affectionate (whether that be cause of inebriation is up for interpretation), he likes to flip the script and have it so he is the one buried in your chest

D= Domestic (do they want to settle down? how are they at cooking and cleaning?)

↳ nam-gyu doesn’t strike me as the type of person who is in any sort of rush to settle down. he’s moreso worried about getting super attached to someone, only to have them leave like all the rest. if, and that’s a big if, he decides he does actually want to settle down— it’s because he sees that you love him for him, not just one superficial thing

he’s actually a bit of a clean freak, he likes to have everything in it’s right place and will be anal about organizing. he should definitely count his lucky stars if his partner can cook though, because it’s a wonder he survived beforehand when he’s the kind of guy to set water on fire

E= Ending (if they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

↳ he wouldn’t be able to do it himself, especially if you guys have been together for a while. he’ll just stop trying in the relationship at all, waiting it out until you decide to break up with him.

if you guys haven’t been together a long time, he’ll break things off very callously, saying something like “it was never really that serious.” but even still, deep down, your reaction would break his heart a little bit

F= Fiance(e) (how do they feel about commitment? how quick would they want to get married?)

↳ as much as some may hate to hear it, i can’t see nam-gyu being the type to ever get married. common law is the furthest i can see him going in a relationship

G= Gentle (how gentle are they? both physically and emotionally)

↳ i don’t actually think nam-gyu is the type to not be gentle, if that makes sense.

he’ll definitely try to perform, try to seem like that standard “bad boy” persona, much like in the crowds he manages at the club. but deep down? he’s a pretty big softie, it just takes a while to get down to the core of it— you know?

H= Hugs (do they like hugs? how often do they do it? what are their hugs like?)

↳ he hugs you like his life depends on it, he’s the type of person to bury his face in the crook of your neck as you hug.

out in public, the most he’ll give you is a half-hug— but that’s not all he’s capable of in this department.

I= I Love You (how fast do they say the L-word?)

↳ nam-gyu wants to be loved, yearns so badly to hear you say the three big words. but, something stops him from saying them to you for the longest while. he’s afraid of coming off too strongly, and in actuality he doesn’t want to scare you off.

in short, it takes so long for him to say it, you actually start to wonder if he loves you at all

J= Jealousy (how jealous do they get? what do they do when they’re jealous?)

↳ it’s simple. he shuts down when he gets jealous, becomes very cold. we’ve known that nam-gyu clearly struggles with insecurities, and i feel like when he’s jealous he projects and takes those insecurities out on his partner

he never means to be cruel, but when he feels like anyone is a better option than he is, and he sees you being checked out and approached by one of the “better options”? his words will be cutting in the argument that will no doubt follow, and he will feel terrible about it

K= Kisses (what are their kisses like? where do they like to kiss you? where do they like to be kissed?)

↳ nam-gyu’s kisses can vary, but more often than not he’s surprisingly gentle when you guys kiss. when you guys really sink into it, he’ll have his hands all over you— to be sure.

he would never say it out loud, but he always gets butterflies when you kiss his hands or on his neck. of course, mouth to mouth kissing is his favourite but that’s no surprise.

as for where he likes to kiss you: anywhere you’ll let him honestly, but he’s been known to be a neck kisser himself.

L= Little Ones (how are they around children?)

↳ he thinks kids are annoying, but he’s not mean to them. most children find nam-gyu very intimidating, so it’s not very often he has an interaction with one.

M= Morning (how are mornings spent with them?)

↳ nam-gyu is not a morning person. at all.

if you try to talk to him at all before 10 AM, you will be getting something thrown at you, or crude words tossed in your direction.

N= Night (how are nights with them?)

↳ his job forces him to be more lively at night, but even then after hours that’s not saying much.

typically he’ll spend his night outside smoking, of course you usually join him— whether it be by partaking in a smoke yourself or just sitting with him, talking about your day. he pretends to be aloof about it all, but hearing you talk about the goings-on in your world is quite relaxing to him.

O= Open (when would they start revealing things about themselves? do they share everything all at once or does it take a while for them to come out of their shell?)

↳ nam-gyu is a challenge in the opening-up department, that’s for sure. he has trouble letting people in out of fear of one day disappointing and losing them forever.

he needs to know for a fact that you won’t abandon him if you’re going to know his life story.

P= Patience (how easily angered are they?)

↳ he gets ticked off to a comically easy degree. it’s so bad to the point where you and your friends get him angry on purpose, just for the laughs of it all

Q= Quizzes (how much do they remember about you? do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

↳ nam-gyu may strike everyone as the kind of guy who doesn’t remember important things about his friends— and they would be absolutely right in thinking that.

he remembers the obscure things, like that one thing you said under your breath about that rude server three years ago, or how hard you laughed when that guy who was hitting on your friend at the amusement park smacked his head against a fun house mirror post rejection— it’s quite literally the most random things he remembers

R= Remember (what is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

↳ discovering that you liked to gossip just as much as he did. you both love to shit talk people you don’t like to eachother, and you guys for sure kill yourselves laughing about how stupid you think your opps are

S= Security (how protective are they?)

↳ he’s pretty protective of you, but in more of an obsessed way than anything else. you’re the greatest thing that’s ever happened to him, why should anyone else get to walk in and steal you away?

T= Try (how much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

↳ he’s the kind of guy to do the bare minimum, i fear. commitment is not his strong suit, but he has a quality that makes up for it

U= Ugly (what are some bad habits of theirs?)

↳ definitely his lack of a filter. nam-gyu’s worst habit is not thinking before he says stuff, and that’s for sure bit him in the ass in the past

V= Vanity (how concerned are they with their looks?)

↳ he’s very concerned with looking his best, this is a habit carried over from his job. say what you want about the fuckassness of his haircut, but he actually makes that shit work

W= Whole (would they feel incomplete without you?)

↳ in a way, yes. he definitely gets validation from knowing someone else wants him, or needs him, in any way.

X= Xtra (a random headcanon for them)

↳ he has a guilty pleasure for shows like dance moms. the way he was eating up the family tea between yong-sik and geum-ja? oh you know nam-gyu would fuck up a scene with abby lee miller and kelly hyland 🙂‍↕️✋

Y= Yuck (what are some things they wouldn’t like, in general and in a partner?)

↳ the main thing i can think of is someone who interrupts people and/or has a lack of basic manners. he would find it embarrassing to be seen with someone with no decorum like that in public

Z= Zzz (what are their sleep habits?)

↳ i already know his ass sleeps in volatile conditions. he’s got a loose sheet, a white noise machine and a dream.

when you guys move in together, it takes him a while but he does eventually grow accustomed to sleeping with many blankets in a cold room.

═════════════

thank you so much for reading!

as always, any advice or constructive criticism on how to improve my writing is appreciated and requested!

to the anon who requested this, thank you so much! i had so much fun dissecting nam-gyu’s character like this, and i hope at least someone out there agrees with me in these headcanons! 💌

have a fantastic night/day lovelies 💋

tags: @gongyoosgf @strangelife122 @namsgyu @kouzih

[grimmsbride]

▒ ❀ ̭͡⠀ ❛ SOME ENCOURAGEMENT. NAM-GYU / PLAYER 124

nam-gyu attempts to recruit beloved, timid reader into thanos’s world. all it takes is a little encouragement.

𖥔 ࣪˖ TAGS, nam-gyu is a little pushy (but everything is consensual between him and reader) | unconsensual voyuerism (again everyone is asleep but i don’t wanna make anyone uncomfortable) | ooc characters (first time writing for nam-gyu) | minor degradation & praise (+humiliation(?)) | use of the words slut, good girl, etc. | fingering | minor dacryphilia | just a silly little imagine | nam-gyu is lowkey manipulative | reader is a freak with a thing for fingers/hands | etc.

𖥔 ࣪˖ NOTES, writing smut on company time is actually hilarious, idk why i got this idea during work. but anywho — i hope you enjoy, i tried my hand at his character. as always please ignore any grammar mistakes or typos.

Imagine Nam-Gyu attempting to recruit someone without the advice of his beloved purple-haired leader. Surprising, right? Despite his own issues with inferiority; the ex-club worker just seems to follow behind Thanos like a hungry puppy desperate for a bone— or drugs, for that matter. But no, just this once, Nam-Gyu takes the lead. The numbers are growing closer and even more scarce, fear lacing people’s minds and causing them to hit that dreaded X button. Thanos’s World’s dream is to continue the games to pay off their debts, right?— so it only made sense for Nam-Gyu to turn an X over to the O side.

He couldn’t just pick anyone. Someone far too strong-willed would definitely tell him no, and someone far too weak would just be a curse rather than a blessing.

Who to choose.. Who to choose..

Soon enough the man’s eyes are locking on to you— a contestant he has seen around, yet hasn’t heard much from. Not only were you easy on the eyes but you just seemed like the perfect person to shape into a worthy teammate.

Within minutes he’s approaching you, an easy-going smile in place as your name falls from his lips. Nam-Gyu had heard it said before by someone close to you, another random that he hadn’t bother to think about.

“Yes..?” Your words are slow, lips pursing as you take in the man before you. You were beyond nervous; this was the lackey of that purple-haired lunatic after all. Watching the two fight on the very first day was enough to tell you to avoid them at all costs. Yet here you were, a few feet away from one of them, under his gaze that trailed over you like a pretty piece of jewelry behind a display case.

You couldn’t help but bring your hands closer to yourself, teeth dragging across your cheek nervously.

From your head to your toes, Nam-Gyu’s eyes soon landed on that big red patch residing just under your bosom. With a breathy chuckle he reached over, allowing a single finger to press and trace the X.

“You wanna get out of the games that bad, huh? You voted X twice already.”

Your eyes flicked down to his hand, before traveling back to his face. “Yeah well..” You dragged slowly, watching that harsh gaze return to your features.

“I—I want to get rid of my debts.. but putting my life on the line for it just seems..” You hoped you got your words across perfectly, even without continuing your sentence. Sure, it was hard being hounded for your debts, but death looming over your head just didn’t seem worth it.

Still, Nam-Gyu only shook his head at you, a sigh full of pity escaping his lips.

“Well, that’s where you’re messing up.” Nam-Gyu hummed, stepping just a bit closer, finger still tracing that damned patch. Your attention kept flicking between his face and finger, wondering why exactly warmth was pooling throughout your entire body.

“Worrying too much about dying is what’s gonna get you killed, not anything else.”

Your eyebrows knitted close, a look of confusion plastered across your face. Worrying seemed like the right way to keep yourself alive.. right? Not worrying just seemed, well— stupid. Not that you would say that to his face, obviously.

“I have to disagree..”

Just barely did you hear the sound of the man sucking his teeth, watching the way his face turned to the side, clearly searching for his next few words. You debated on walking away from this conversation, it was clear what his objective was. And whether ordered by Thanos or not, you didn’t really want to know— nor figure out.

Yet for some reason you were practically glued to the spot, blinking up at him and waiting oh, so patiently for his next spiel. And as you watched his face turn back to you, your breath got caught in your throat.

“Okay then.. worry all you want, but you wouldn’t you want someone to look out for you?” Nam-Gyu’s other hand was reaching to your patch at this point, using both thumbs to trace it. “Being on this side, there’s no unity.. it’s every person for themself.”

The two of you locked eyes, a sickeningly sweet smile crossing his face.

“Come with us, and we’ll look after you. I’ll personally see to it too.”

Slowly did your teeth sink into your bottom lip, struggling to maintain the eye contact that he seemed so keen on keeping. The only thing you could hear was your racing heart and the gentle sounds of his thumbs sliding across that red patch. His words were.. tempting. You wondered if he rehearsed what to say, like a video game with multiple endings; did he have it all figured out before he even walked over? Was he so prepared to convert you, using every rejection you had as some silly obstacles the man easily hobbled over?

So caught up in your thoughts, you hardly realized Nam-Gyu had gotten even closer until his breath fanned across your ear in a simple;

I’ll let you think it over, let’s talk again later..

When you thought of later, you initially believed in thirty mins or so. Maybe this time he would bring over his beloved leader to really get the point across. But no, later seemed to be during lights out; when you all should be sleeping, tucked away in the rare bliss these murderous games brought.

And the only talking that was happening was the soft words Nam-Gyu continued to whisper into your ear and the even softer moans of passion that slipped from your swollen lips.

See, Nam-Gyu wasn’t an idiot despite what Thanos seems to think. Quickly he caught on to two things whilst speaking to you.

The first being, you were quite cute when nervous. And two, you just loved looking at his hands.

So what better way to really stretch his point across but using his beloved fingers to stretch you open just how he liked?

“Should have done this from the start, look how cooperative you’re being..” The smile on Nam-Gyu’s face was permanent at this point, the corner of his mouth twitching with each pitiful moan you released. His rings were tossed lazily to the side, his bare fingers now pushing into your sloppy cunt so perfectly. Longer then your own, they pushed and prodded; opening you up and rubbing against your soaked walls. With each breath you were clenching, causing the smile on his face to only grow deeper.

“Scared of dying but not of some stranger finger-fucking you, huh? What a joke.”

You wanted to tell him off, how he was so mean and so wrong. But you couldn’t, not with how your mind was getting complete lost from his movements. Your teeth were grinding into your bottom lip, a metallic taste filling your mouth as time progressed. Deep moans thundered from your throat, muffled by your harsh biting. You couldn’t imagine having your little recruitment interrupted by some poor contestant just trying to get some rest.

But with the way Nam-Gyu was practically ruining you, it didn’t seem he cared much either way. He was so hellbent on coaxing you, his lips right against your ear as that damned thumb came and circled your swollen bud.

“I told you I’d look after you right, where’s my thank you?”

Your eyes widened the moment his free hand rose, pushing at your cheeks and basically forcing your lips to part. The sound you let out was a strangled mix of a moan and gasp, quickly clasping your own hand against your mouth.

Nam-Gyu chuckled on his breath, thrusting a third finger into your wet cunt as he spoke; “What? You scared of the other contestants realizing how much of a slut you are? Shouldn’t worry too much; this messy cunt is making enough noise for you.”

Your eyes were meeting the back of your skull, so fucking mean he was— yet you couldn’t help but enjoy the attention. His digits were curling inside, brushing across that special spot that caused you to shake. Your thighs were clenching harshly around his arm, rushed breaths escaping as your chest rose and fell.

“Th—thank you.. fuck— please…!” You whimpered as softly as you possibly could, glossy eyes staring up at the man. You felt accomplished the moment he drew closer, feeling the cold metal of his chain brush against your heated skin before a gentle kiss was pressed right against your cheek.

“What a good girl.. You wanna come, hm?” The hand was lowering to your throat, fingers simply wrapping around it yet not squeezing. Nam-Gyu watched in pure enjoyment at the way your head tossed back and forth in a rushed nod; how needy you were for him. What a palpable little thing, is what he thought.

“I can make that happen, you just gotta do something for me.”

More words, whispered, tempting; drifting right into your ear and hitting the same pleasurable spots right between your legs. Speaking of, you felt your peak drawing closer; a tight band resting deep in your tummy— ready to burst.

You knew what he wanted, you weren’t an idiot nor were you too fucked out to forget. Your mind was screaming at you, telling you an orgasm wasn’t worth pressing that cursed button.

Yet, for now, you weren’t thinking with your brain, but with your pussy instead.

“P—please let me join! I’ll press the button— I promise!” Another whisper-yell escaped you, desperation clinging to every word as they fled those pretty lips.

With that final confirmation Nam-Gyu was quickening the pace of his fingers, eating up the way your body convulsed, a lost look invading your eyes as you came undone. Your essence trickled down his fingers all the way to his wrist, a sticky residue that he would make sure you clean up later.

For now.. his hand rose from your throat to instead cup your cheek, rubbing his thumb right under your eye so tenderly— so sweetly.

“I knew you could do it.. just needed some encouragement, right?”

[namsgyu]

rychan nam wld def blow smoke into ur mouth before pulling you into a kiss :3c

omg mikachan ur so right :3

☆彡

when you join him outside for a smoke break, he’s definitely holding it in his mouth a little for the sole purpose of blowing it into your mouth as he presses his lips to yours

he’ll laugh as you cough and rapidly wave your hand at the smoke, a weak attempt to swat away the fumes

this little shit watches you in amusement as he takes another draw from his cigarette, this time blowing it into your face instead

“nam! i don’t mind you smoking, but this is a little too much” you’ll whine, a fake sternness in your voice

namgyu will lower his face to yours, “but even if i do this-” he pauses to take another drag and tugs on the collar of your shirt to kiss you, parting his lips just enough to release the tobacco flavored steam into your mouth

“- you couldn’t get mad at me, right?” he’s staring down at you, his signature smirk painting his face

“i- stop doing that!” you stammer out and you can feel your face heating up at his previous action

chuckling, namgyu waves you off “yeah yeah, i’ll stop when you actually mean it”

in reality, you never actually mean it. the slight intimate act between you both brings butterflies to your stomach and a certain heat between your legs and namgyu knows it. he’ll never stop

☆彡

thank you for coming to my ted talk mikachan <3 ily

[misayani]

BOOBS, THIGHS, OR HANDS? — SQUID GAME WOMEN AND MEN

◜ featuring ... kang mi-na (player 196), no eul (guard 011), se-mi (player 380), jun-hee (player 222), hyun-ju (player 120), young-mi (player 195), kang sae-byeok (s1 player 067), thanos (player 230), dae-ho (player 388), nam-gyu (player 124), min-su (player 125), myung-gi (player 333), in-ho (frontman)

𔗨 author's note — badly need to write something else that's not smut after this [lowercase intended]

🧷 𝓜isa mentions — @joc3lynx @mymel1008 @justredsw @wlvlurvsfimmia @azansstuff @dvrk-hoon @yersang-dreams @keiradg01

warnings: nsfw [everything is consensual]

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖ BOOBS — no eul, se mi, jun hee, young mi, sae byeok, thanos, dae ho, min-su

no-eul fucking loves your boobs, no matter the size. she loves railing you in front of a mirror just so she could see them jiggle while she uses her strap on you. she's also the type who would leave bite marks on your boobs, not just kiss marks, but bite marks. no-eul would always make you undress your top whenever you ride her so that she could watch them bounce and squeeze them !!

guess who would suggest you get nipple piercings? se-mi. she absolutely loves it when you wear thin tank tops at home cause she gets to see them through the fabric. se-mi's also the type to take pictures of your boobs and jerk off to them whenever she misses you.

pervy jun-hee LOVES when you wear revealing tops cause obviously, boobs !!! jun-hee's the type of bestfriend who claims to herself that she's a girl's girl and just- very very close with girl-friends, so it wasn't totally weird when she asked to touch your boobs just because she was 'curious'. and of course, you let her, girl bestfriends touch each others boobs, right??? 

young-mi has an oral fixation, i repeat, young-mi has an oral fixation. she's so fucking needy and always needs her mouth to be latched onto your boobs 24/7. she literally wouldn't back down until you let her suck on them !!! young-mi can't also sleep without having your boob on her mouth :((

wax play with sae-byeok !!! it's insane she gets herself off just by pouring melted wax on your boobs while you cry out of pain. sae-byeok's also the type to slap your boobs !!! it's strange how sae-byeok likes to inflict pain on her lover.

titty fucking is something su-bong enjoys a lot. whenever you both have sex, there should always be a round where he gets off by fucking your boobs. andddd cumshots !! he loves cumming on your chest, and then he would lick his own cum from them after ♡

dae-ho's the type of man who would masturbate while his eyes are locked onto the sight of your boobs. like literally, you're just in front of him, playing with them, while he jacks off. 

to end this off nicely, we have min-su, who just really loves your boobs. it's nothing sexual, he just really admires them. whenever you both have movie nights, he'd squeeze and play with them—cause he thinks they're so soft and squishy and all that. overall just a sweet boy who admires your body sm !!

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖ THIGHS — mi na, hyun ju, nam gyu

when i think of thigh rider, i think of mi-na. this girl adores your thighs so much, esp when you wear super cute clothing that shows them!! plus, mi-na can get possesive of you, so that'll mean her marking your plush thighs up and making you wear short dresses in public <3

hyun-ju loves burying her face on your thighs and then just sleep like that. she's also a body worshipper !!!! absolutely loves your body no matter the size, color, shape. whatever you give her she'll love it, as long as it's you.

thigh fucking with nam-gyu. i can imagine him having you on his lap with his dick in between your thighs—pumping him—while he spanks the fuck out of your ass until it turns red. AND HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GUY'S HANDS??? he'll definitely take advantage of how nice his hands look like. he's probably the type of guy who would take a picture of his hand gripping your thighs and then make you post the picture on your instagram to make the whole world see that you're taken. 

𓏲๋࣭࣪˖ HANDS — myung gi, in ho

myung-gi likes to hold your hands a lot! even if you say no cause you think your hands get sweaty so much, the boy does not gaf. it's the part of you that he fidgets with so much—when he gets nervous, when he's thinking of something, or just while he absentmindedly scrolls on his phone. 

sugardaddy in-ho who would spend hundreds of thousands of won on your nail set !!! of course, he'll pamper his baby's hands before you return the favor and give him a handjob <3 he absolutely just loves making you pretty and dainty all the time. until he gets tired of you and just leaves you off somewhere

@misayani

[marshmallowkisses]

I’m tired of characters that are considered “dark” only having dark fics written about them.

I’ve seen people say “Well what did you expect, he wouldn’t-“

Imma stop you right there. Here’s the thing. The he in question isn’t real and I can project anything I feel onto him. And personally I’d like to scroll through his x reader tags without seeing “This post contains filtered tags” over and over again.

The tag in question being “noncon”

Just because a character isn’t a ball of sunshine, doesn’t mean every single fic has to be about r@pe. So for the love of the universe tone it down when people talk about wanting softer fics. Some of y’all are just plain rude.

And stop criticizing people for making a character OOC.

Let us have our fluff.

[midnite-c6]

Hii!:D Can you write about timid fem!reader x Namgyu nsfw? Like reader has a hand kink and she keeps staring at Namgyu’s hands. And once the lights out, Namgyu decides to confront reader.

Sorry if this is maybe a bit confusing this is my first time requesting😞🫶🏻 Btw I rlly love your fics💕

his hands are so hot holy lord 🤤 i would kfc on those thangs finger licking good fr he keeps us filled up here, dis to all the hand lovers MEOW

nam-gyu x timid!reader smut !! <3 warnings: 18+, DARK content, spoilers, dubcon, humiliation, fingering

つ⁠｡⁠☆ imagine.. when you first met him at the games, (ignoring the deaths & violence in the background), you shamelessly keep staring at his veiny hands!! like oh lord !! the rings in his pointer and middle finger weren't helping either, as well as that stylistic choice of a black wristband, it only added to the appeal. this is what kept you going, to be honest, even if nam-gyu wasn't necessarily the good guy inside the games, you'd only vote 'O' to be with him longer! he notices this, of course, and takes advantage every time! getting closer to you, his hand slightly patting your head to "calm" you down, and when he sees you not having any energy to eat, he'd ask for it, but if you KINDLY reject him, he scoffs, "do you want me to feed it to you then?", ... "if you're not gonna eat, i'll force the food inside you.", "you'd want my fingers shoved up that mouth of yours, right?" hoo.. boy...

you were so... weird. he thinks. because he's absolutely aware of your obsession with his hands, and he decides to test the waters! well, not test, he fully dives in.

you were the only team member that remained with him, thanos died, se-mi died, and min-su was too scared to face him. he told you he'd have a meeting during lights out, opting you to come to his bed. nam-gyu's really shocked at your "loyalty" for him, but still punishes you for it!

nsfw below -> !! (⁠.⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠)

... he kept his promise of shoving down his fingers down your throat, his pointer and middle finger, inches deep inside, making you gag. this was to shut you up, there was a metallic taste, due to the ring he was wearing. "i know you've been wanting this, so don't scream." he whispers, his other arm forcing your legs to open wide, "if i hear you, even a little bit, i'll kill you, got it?" he's so strict, it's fucking you up, mentally. but you nod, and it painfully adds up to his ego, making him think: so you DID want this? you were now voluntarily at his mercy?? well he might've forgotten his blatant death threats but still...

he'd remove the two fingers inside your mouth, giving you a firm look, you better not make a noise! pushing your pants off your legs, seeing the wet gray patch in the middle of your panties. "jeez. you're even wet." he says, dissaprovingly staring. he places his whole hand to rub the apex of your thighs, he could only watch you arch your back and watch your hand fly to your mouth so you wouldn't make any noise, as ordered. he then leaves two fingers to be placed on your clothed clit. "here, hm?" you nod frantically, wishing he'd apply more friction to the bud, he'd playfully scoff, simply ignoring your clit as he moves the two fingers down your clothed hole. the way it got wetter was so mesmerizing for him! ".. didn't even know girls like you existed."

"freak. you should be ashamed of yourself." he'd now slip your panties to your ankles, making you fully bare for him, it was so embarassing for you :(, it was like he was judging your pussy, he'd take another second to look at it, before harshly slapping your cunny with his heavy hand, it hurt so bad!! you'd yelp from the pain, making him slap it again as punishment, "damn it, quiet." your clit was twitching as a reaction huhu...

he'd take another second to stare, seeing your pussy clench onto nothing! in that moment, he almost felt bad, since he's so humiliated for you! leaving no warning, he'd shove his middle and pointer finger inside, it stings. he knows it stings, he just doesn't care. he'd spread his fingers slightly, making a 'scissor' hand sign inside, he could see the insides of your cunt in full view now.

it takes no time for him to run out of patience. quickly setting a fast pace with his fingers, relentlessly pumping in and out of you. he slips it out, just to shove it right back in without any interval, making you gush all over the mattress, for sure he's gonna punish you for that later.

when he pushes your thighs to your chest to get a more deeper angle, his fingers were now hitting your g-spot! he'd even curl his fingers at the right moment. you'd let out a small noise from the feeling, none of your exes ever got to make you feel like that. your other hand that wasn't holding your mouth shut was lightly hitting his side, signaling him, you couldn't take it anymore, it was all too fast and you might've even--! oh. you'd embarrassingly squirt all over his hands, arms, and jacket. "filthy fucking cunt, did i tell you to cum?" you whined, "i'm s.. s-sorry-!" he only tsks. "fuck. disgusting. clean that up, quick."

how were you gonna clean it up? by your mouth, he'd make you lick all your cum and juices that coated his hands and arms, you were still shaken up from your orgasm, but this made it ten times worse, you felt like a dog :(.

holy shit Man journalism is not for the weak im too busy and for WHat , ANYWAys here guys, just gonna start it off, expect more posts from sat to sun, hopefully i'd be free in the weekdays too :< . namgyu thanos threesome next, as usual!

[mimipolo]

Nam-gyu x GN!reader headcanons

I started writing just because I had so many scenarios of him in my head I needed to get out so tysm for liking my last post.

No this is not proof read, I MIGHT edit it later.

This man is horribly clingly to an extreme. Will hold onto anything in reach clothes, arm, shoulder. Honestly anywhere you'll allow him to. He won't touch the obvious places that would vouch for consent but he'd definitely be eager if you say he could.

And if you're someone's that's not into being constantly touched all the time he'd try his best to respect that but there'll definitely be moments when he reaches out for you and stops midway or his hand brushes you briefly. At some point he can't take it and takes a different route by standing so close your shoulders touch or instead urging you to initiate.

I feel like he takes care of his hands the best, his hair is choppy and his apartment is a state but he'll always make time to trim and take care of his nails. You asked him about it before and he just said he bites his nails a lot and didn't further explain why.

He seems like the type to be jittery a lot even when he's not high, in fact I think his hands would possibly shake less when he is. His hands shaking doesn't always necessarily means he's nervous but if you take them in yours to comfort him he'd definitely milk the hell out of it and hold out his hands to you expecting you to run your thumbs over them, that playful grin he always wears when he knows he's about to get what he wants on his face as he tilts his head at you.

Jealousy is in his top three emotions. He's far from perfect unfortunately and his possessiveness is definitely one of those defining traits. He would casually bring up bad things a person you're getting close to has done (like he's any better). Rubbing your back and preaching about how you should just stick with him.

Likes it if you run your hands down his back and sides, at first he found it annoying because of how ticklish it felt but shut up when you pointed out how hypocritical he was being. Being the fraud he is he quickly grew to like it, slumping his body over yours and as always expects to receive the embrace.

Lets you cut his hair, it's honestly the least of his concerns, is what he tells you at least. Sometimes you'll catch him picking at his hair in the reflection for too long. He's sat on the floor of your bathroom as you sit on the bathtub rim facing the mirror, his eyes are trained on your hands the whole time and he just couldn't help constantly making distracting pointers, a nudge to his side earns you a scoff before he eventually just let's you work.

Would constantly be twirling your hair if he's on call, he's persistent. If you have short hair or bald he'd scratch your scalp or nape of your neck, anything nearest to him.

He'd genuinely be happy if you initiated touch, even if it's not in public. He just liked the knowledge that you also like him enough to reciprocate.

This guy definitely has a staring problem, usually on your side or back profile but sometimes he zeroes in on random places that make you raise an eyebrow at him or push his head away flustered. And no you can't stare at him back he'll start blubbering about something that doesn't make sense and rubs his hands together to ease the nerves.

Defends you quietly, anyone that has talked behind your back gets confronted away from you. Obviously if they insult you in front of him he's swearing and throwing out threats he can't stand up to. If he wins (if) he'd try to act cool as he shrugs and wipes the blood from his nose and nudges you playfully, scolding you for "always getting him in trouble."

Absolutely insufferable during movies, won't shut up. Constantly pointing out bad acting or something he would've done in the characters position. Will only be quiet if you take charge of feeding him popcorn when you can tell he's about to yap, the instinct comes naturally after being around him for so long. Only times you'll mostly let him talk is during tense scenes in horror movies, it's alright then as he talks your ear off about random stuff in the movie that's somehow not relevant. Your eyes screwed with anxiety to the screen as he laughs and pulls you closer to his side (he starts talking to calm himself down because he's just as scared.)

Likes how warm your stomach is, always coming up behind you just to lay his cold hands on your stomach, causing you to jolt because he's like freezing?? He only chuckles and presses himself closer against you as he squeezes your sides. It's almost as if he knows how annoying he is.

Whenever you two lie in bed there's always a moment where he's lying on your chest, he honestly just looks thoughtless as he stares into the gap where your shirt meets your collarbone. Sighs heavily like a burdens been lifted when he smooth your palm over his hair and kiss his temple. You always fall asleep before him, I honestly believe he's an insomniac or at least has some problems sleeping, he's content just lying on you as you doze off though.

If you had a specific or unique style he'd admire it a lot. Honestly proud because he can't be asked to put the same effort into himself. If you do dress him up he'll feel good for a moment before feeling like an imposter and taking it off. The only accessories he has are his necklace and rings (you complimented them once and he hasn't thought of going back since.)

As much as he refuses to admit other people's views and opinions of him are a big part of his life. And after so many negative comments about himself he didn't see the point in trying to change it, instead he indulged in all the guilty pleasures they accused him of because what did he have to lose? But any kind words you give him he hangs onto like a life line, even just saying his name correctly has him hooked(Thanos...). He'll act all smug as you praise him, nodding and grinning while his ears flush red.

He also loves your hands. Kissing the tips, knuckles, pulse joint, everywhere. Makes you involuntary hold his face or put your hands on him. Likes seeing your hands intwined a lot, it feels solidifying.

Geekiest smile ever oh my days. He always looks so intimidating when he's outside but the moment another person (especially you) enters his bubble he's all smiles and chuckles, ducking his head softly as his hand covers his mouth. He could not handle being alone for too long.

The type of guy to randomly show up outside your apartment with takeaway with no warning and fully expects you to let him in, he knows you don't go out so it's the least you could do. Is already a foot inside your doorway when you finally open the door when you stop him, hand on your hip as you look him up and down.

"Since when did you have takeaway money?"

"Do you not wanna eat? Damn just let me in."

Chat can you tell I adore him 🤓

[k1mbe3rly]

Could you write something about smut and Namgyu?

Payback

Namgyu x shy fem!reader

warnings: smut, rough sex?

(kinda short 😣👎)

During the six legged pentathlon, Thanos and Nam-gyu technically just picked you up from there and that’s how you got in there group along with, 2 others. You were LOWKEY scared as hell to be in these games. After yall survived the six legged pentathlon you were just kind sitting there until it finally ended.

Everything was going great, quiet besides the sound of people whispers and finally it was time for voting, you were standing in the crowd watching people vote, until nam-gyu turned around facing you and Min-su, “Y’all better not fuck this up.” he claimed staring at the both of y’all, Min-su did a small ‘huh?’, Nam-gyu grabbed onto the little ‘X’ that was on the left side of his chest “This” he said lifting it up and slightly pulling it, he turned over to you grabbing your ‘X’ as well, “Like we agreed. we do one more, and then we get out, Right?” he said as you and Min-su did a small glance at each other, and Min-su nodded.

Nam-gyu turned his gaze to you getting a bit closer “One more. right princess?” he said smirking a bit, and slightly punishing back the ‘X’ into your chest as you sighed and nodded.

he winked at you before looking away and soon enough it was time for your vote as you walked up there and looked behind to see Nam-gyu making a ‘O’ shape, you looked back and thought for a minute before finally clicking on.. ‘X’, You went to the X side while avoiding contact with Nam-gyu

“Bitch..” he mumbled out, 30 minutes before lights out he went up to you grabbing onto your jacket collar “Who do you think you are huh?! i told you one more fucking game, didn’t i!?” he yelled into your face, “I-I’m sorry! i just don’t wanna die! i wanna go home already!” you yelled out. “Nice try bitch. but you fucking have to stay here now, With me. You really tried leaving didn’t you!” he yelled out as his friend Thanos or whatever grabbed onto his shoulder “Leave it man we got other things to worry about besides this” he said clearly drugged up, Nam-gyu looks at him and than looked back at me, he shoved me away slightly “Your gonna fucking pay for this” he said before walking away, you looked away in a bit of shock and scared.

It was until the middle of the night you woke up feeling the urge to pee.

you walked up to the door and knocked on it before the guards stared at you thru the slid window, fast forward you managed to beg them to let you in and now you were in a stall.

Once you finished you were washing your hands until the door opened and closed, you looked up into the mirror seeing Nam-gyu, you quickly widen your eyes and turned around, he walked up to you calmly, “How’d you get in here?! t-this is the girls bathroom pervert!” you yelled out “So?, doesn’t matter to me. What matters to me is that you picked ‘X’.” He said looking into your eyes, “Either way we’re still here! you guys won!” you said back. “And yet..your still gonna fucking pay” he said getting closer grabbing chin and slammed his lips into yours, you stood there for a moment before finally giving in and kissing back

The kiss was a bit rough and harsh as you placed a hand onto the sink, he quickly pulled back shoved you on the ground onto your knees, you looked up at him in confusion until you saw him pull his sweats down along with his boxers, revealing his cock that sprung out perfectly, "Open." He said Down to you, you opened up your mouth while he grabs your hair and pulls your mouth onto his cock, you quickly started sucking it as you looked up at him, as he continued to stare down at you biting his lip “Fuck.. who knew you were so good at sucking dick huh? you do this a lot hm?” he said gripping your hair tightly and guiding your head as he groaned and leaned his head back, as you swirled your tongue around, you were running out of air and tried pulling back but he wouldn’t let you, instead he started mouth fucking you, shoving his dick deep inside your throat making you gag on it a bit, your eyes started tearing up a bit as you placed your hands on his hips trying to push him back, “Fuck! take this dick down your throat bitch!” he yelled out as his cock twitched, he let out more groans before cumming into your mouth.

You quickly backed up panting, your mouth of his cum, “Swallow it, i wanna watch you like the whore you are” he said, you quickly tried to swallow it as you gasped and panted a bit, he shoves you up and bent you the counter leaving you to see your reflection to the mirror “Nam-gyu-!” you tried speaking “Shh. shut the fuck up! i’m not done with you” he said shoving your pants down and your panties and quickly lined up his tip against your entrance, he wasted no time shoving it in as you moaned out, he chuckled at your reaction and placed his hands on his hips as he begin thrusting, his thrust were hard and fast, as he looked down seeing his dick go in and out, and his hips slamming onto your ass, he slapped your ass and looked back into the mirror seeing you moaning and looking down as he reached and grabbed your hair pulling it back “I wanna see your pretty face while i fuck you, mkay?” he said while still slamming into you, you nodded as you gripped onto the sink “Nam-gyu! too much! s-slow down!” you said, he ignored you as he went a bit faster groaning, “Fuckk! take it! take this fucking cock.” he said pulling onto your hair more making your head go back as you felt your orgasm rise “M’gonna cum!” you moaned out as he slapped your ass, not long after you came as he kept going for a small bit and finally cummed as well, panting he let go of your hair.

He stared into you in the mirror as he breathed heavily, he slowly pulled out watching his cum mixed with your eyes spill out, he chuckled at the sight and quickly pulled his pants back up “Next time pick ‘O’ or ima fuck you in front of everyone.” he said, you looked at him, “You’ll probably like that anyways.” he said walking away, before he left he looked back at you smirking at bit than walking out the door, leaving you there as you collected all your thoughts.

[dearsubong]

squid game smau thanos and nam gyu as your boyfriends ➪

contains : lots of arguing between the two, sexual themes, swearing C:

sum : as above xo

an : ty for the notes and comments on the bby picture ones, luv yall <3

an 2 : YO WHY IS THE EUGH MESSAGE SO FAR ON THE SIDE TF // ooc??

[spatialwave]

cooler, sweeter, hotter.

➸ pairing: nam-gyu x fem!reader ➸ word count: 2.6k ➸ tags: nsfw, smut, semi-public, dirty talk, rough, no protection, nam-gyu and reader are switches. ➸ notes: requests are temporarily open for squid game content! writing for nam-gyu, thanos and dae-ho! i have a few in my ask box that i'll get to soon :)

part 2 ->

You sat on your bunk, your eyes settled ahead at nothing in particular, as everyone around you began splitting off into teams after the conclusion of the recent vote. As someone with enough debt to make your parents disown you, you wore the blue circle on your jacket, though not so proudly.

You were selfish; you always had been.

That’s why you were sitting on your bunk and staring blankly as the time ticked away. Uncaring that just beyond the open floor of the dormitory sat dozens of players who missed their beds, homes and families—stuck there because of everyone who voted to stay. 

You let out a sigh, hands moving between your crossed legs as the coursing sensation of desire washed through you. It was only human to feel such things, wasn’t it? It had been nearly three days since you were stuck in this hellhole and weeks since you’d felt the touch of another that was more than just someone gripping you for dear life.

You had a fool-proof plan, having watched the patterns of most players and noted when the bathroom would be at its quietest before it emptied for the night—an escape to break off from the dorm and hide away in a stall until you found release.

However, the sound of your name being whispered stirred you from your thoughts, blinking a few times as your gaze snapped to your left and landed on player 124. His name was on the tip of your tongue as your eyes connected with his, watching the way he crossed his arms on the side of your bed as he sat on the stairs next to it.

“Nam-su,” you muttered, cocking an eyebrow at him.

“Nam-gyu,” he corrected, irritation growing, but he stamped it down to earn your favour. After all, he was more perceptive than others gave him credit for, and he’d noticed the way you’d squeezed your thighs together when voting—when grabbing your meal. He was as needy as you.

You rolled your eyes, clicking your tongue. “What do you want? I’m trying to rest.”

He smirked; the fingers that poked out from the confines of his long sleeves tapped along your untouched bedding. Still firmly tucked in.

“You seem… frustrated,” his voice was low as he spoke, eyes staring up at you as they narrowed, “I am too.”

The remark sent a shiver up your spine, unsure if you should indulge in his words or brush him off. Perhaps it was a lucky guess at how you felt, or he was referring to something else—you had almost screwed up Gonggi when playing in the previous game, so it was fair to assume. 

You sighed, turning your head away and looking across the dormitory where you saw others sitting and finishing up their food slowly. In particular, a young woman whose stomach was so bulged out that she appeared she’d give birth any second. Poor girl.

“Why? Is the game frightening you?” You asked, keeping your gaze ahead as you shifted. You couldn’t deny the ache between your legs, the desire that hoped he felt the same. He wasn’t exactly the type you’d go for back when life wasn’t a game, but you’d take what you could get.

“Not that kind of frustration,” he huffed, irritation bubbling. Ready to curse at you under his breath and give up if you pissed him off more… Well, he would’ve given up. He needed this—badly. “Don’t act. You know what I mean.”

Your eyes flickered to his, sparkling with curiosity. Slowly, you leaned your body on the head you placed over the bed between his arms and where you sat. Your fingernails gripped the bedsheet, and your mouth watered.

“What makes you think you could help me?” You murmured, testing him to see how far you could push his buttons.

“Because you’d have said no already.” He quipped, a tiny smile pulling the corners of his thin lips. Nam-gyu pulled back from the bed, tapping the surface with his hands like a drum as he looked around, “Talk later. Have to use the washroom.”

The hidden invitation sent molten fire into the pit of your stomach, watching as he pushed himself away and tucked his hands back into his sleeves. Without even glancing your way, he slowly walked towards the bathrooms where a few other players came out of—likely empty. Fuck, you really didn’t want to go into the men’s washroom.

Swallowing your pride, you waited a few minutes before sliding off your bed and descending the steps. You walked silently through the dormitory until you reached the hallways leading to the washroom, the first door guarded by two masked workers. As you walked further, you made it between two washrooms, male and female. You wondered for a moment which room he would’ve gone in, looking between them until you heard the sound of a stall shutting in the women’s.

Your feet carried you quickly, hungry for Nam-gyu’s touch, which you hoped was satisfying. At this point, the worst fuck ever would be the best.

Just as you entered the washroom, you quietly walked along the stalls to the left, eyeing up each door. Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you opened a few to no avail until the next door opened, and you were tugged into the stall by a tight hand on your unzipped sweater.

“Fuck,” you hissed, eyes landing on Nam-gyu as your back pressed against the now-closed stall door. Your cheeks flushed, breath heaving in your chest, “How’d you get in here?”

“Just walked in,” he answered, cornering you like a predator and prey. Surprising, considering that you hardly viewed him as the dominant type or at least someone who was capable of dominating you. “The guards don’t give a fuck, so I’m gonna’ roll with it.”

Your thighs spread, inviting his leg that pushed between yours and provided your aching cunt with necessary friction. It was instant the way you rolled against him, hesitant hands lifting to his zipped sweater and grabbing at the clothing that was too big for him.

“Shut up and fuck me, I don’t care about the guards.” You whimpered, grabbing at his neck and yanking him forward until his lips crashed against yours. He whined into your mouth, eyes falling shut as you both resorted to stifled whimpers and moans to communicate.

You rubbed your clothed pussy on his thigh, feeling the wetness soak through your underwear and tracksuit. Likely leaving a wet mark over his leg, he didn’t seem to care much. Two rough hands grabbed at your waist, pushing up the fabric of your sweater and shirt as his nails dug into your skin. You mewled into his mouth, hips moving quicker as the pressure against your heat built up your climax.

The sweater that hung around your body was pushed from your shoulders as he pushed his tongue between your lips. It danced with yours, devouring your moans as the shirt came next—parting the kiss so he could pull your shirt from your body. Nam-gyu leaned back, eyes landing on your exposed chest and focusing on your hardened nipples. A quiet growl rumbled in the back of his throat as he leaned down and captured one of the buds into his mouth, rolling it back and forth between his teeth as he sucked. His other hand grabbed at your neglected breast, massaging the globe as he whined pathetically as he sucked on you.

“You like my tits?” You asked him, your hips moving a steady rhythm against his tensed thigh.

He answered with a muffled sound of acknowledgment, eyes opened to peer up at you. It was then you saw the flicker of enjoyment. He liked you taking control.

“Mm,” you moaned, your hand lifting to his hair and brushing through the strands as you tilted your head back. You breathed out, bucking your hips, “Just like that. You’re so good—“

The praise did wonders as Nam-gyu continued to suck, furthering his touches by pushing his hand past the waistband of your pants. Fingers slipped underneath your panties, finding your wet folds and pushing through them as you shuddered. Your hand tightened in his hair, forcefully pulling him from your chest as he whimpered. Obediently looking up, lips slightly parted as he waited for you.

You rubbed your hips in tandem with his touch, his fingers brushing against your pussy and bumping against your throbbing clit every so often. It was too much, already feeling as though you were going to reach the peak if he kept up his ministrations, so you pushed him back until he crashed against the toilet.

You were quick to follow him, smirking at his wide-eyed expression as you wrestled his pants down his hips until his cock sprung free.

“Fuck,” he huffed, looking down as you stroked his length that felt nice and big in your hand—wondering how well it would fill you. You squeezed your hand, thumb wiping at the bead kd pre-cum at the tip as Nam-gyu brushed his hands back over his hair, eyes rolling back at a rather slow pump of your hand. “Don’t tease me.” He growled.

“Fine,” you smiled, licking over your teeth as you pulled your pants down your legs and kicked them to the side. Leaving your underwear on, Nam-gyu reached forward and tugged your hips until you

straddled him, the other hand pushing the fabric to the side.

A quiet gasp left your lips, hands landing on his shoulders to steady yourself as he easily guided your entrance to his cock. It was hot and wet against the tip, easily pushing inside you. Your thighs trembled, unable to keep yourself up as you buried your face into his neck, whimpering as his cock penetrated as he reached the hilt. You were right, and he filled you well—almost too much as your cunt stretched to fit him. Your fingernails dug into his shoulders over his shirt, his sweater hanging down his arms.

“You’re so fucking tight,” he whispered, his breath hot as he licked the shell of your ear, “Bet you like my cock, don’t you?”

The sudden dominance of his voice sent a shiver up your spine, but it hadn’t surprised you. If there was anything you knew about Nam-gyu, it was that he had one of the biggest egos ever—rivalling Thanos. You weren’t always one to indulge in inflating a man’s ego, preferring to take control into your own hands, but you couldn’t deny that in this moment, you’d do anything to get fucked well. 

“I do,” you whispered against his neck, licking and biting at the skin as his hands grabbed at your hips. He lifted you up, angling himself better as he guided you back down as your ass slapped against his thighs, “Ah, shit—“

“So pretty,” he murmured, smiling as you began to fuck yourself on his cock without any of his help. Greedily pulling your hips up and slamming back down so he could fill your pussy up like you desperately needed, “fucking yourself on me like a good girl. Are you a good girl?” 

You were forced to look at him, fingers digging into his shoulders as he grabbed at your chin and titled your face to look at him. He wore a lopsided smirk, his hair falling out from behind his ears as his body jerked with each rough slam of your hips. His right hand wrapped around the side of your neck, tight as you felt the cold ring around his middle finger touch your skin. His thumb pressed at the base of your throat, a painful pressure that made your walls clench tight around his cock.

You whined, “I am. I’m a good girl.” 

Nam-guy’s lips stretched into a sly smile, his eyes shining in satisfaction as he pulled you forward and crashed your lips to his. He shoved his tongue into your mouth, moaning into it as his hands returned to your hips—nails digging into your skin. He met your hips with him, swallowing all your whimpers and whines as your cunt tightened, a hot pressure building in your low abdomen. 

“Don’t come yet,” he groaned, licking at your lips before dragging his own over your jaw. He licked and nipped at your skin, his hot breath tickling your skin as he stretched you unbelievably thin. “Hold it for me.”

“Nam-su—“ you whined, hips twitching and thighs tensing as your juices left a mess between your bodies.

“Nam-gyu,” he warned, a hand reaching up into your hair and giving it a harsh tug that had you yelping in pain. He attacked your neck with his mouth and teeth, leaving a scattering of marks that you knew would leave bruises in its wake. “Fuck—I’m so close.” He choked on a moan, half-lidded eyes watching you as he pulled back and admitted the red marks over your skin.

When his grip loosened in your hair, you leaned forward and nuzzled your face back against his neck. Allowing him to take control as he fucked you at a relentless pace, the culmination of your moans echoing through the bathroom. You whined against his skin, reaching a hand between your bodies as you rubbed at your clit, desperately searching for your release.

Nam-gyu had begun panting your name under his breath, sounding like a pathetic, needy thing, but you didn’t have the energy to tell him so—both of you chasing after the high you craved. 

With a few more harsh thrusts and circlings of your fingers, the tightness in your abdomen burst. A rush of euphoria crashed through your body, and you croaked out a loud moan that left your throat raw. Nam-gyu slammed into your heat a few more times, hands gripping at your hips so tight you wouldn’t be surprised if they left marks.

“Shit,” he hissed, a moan catching in his throat as he buried his face into your neck as he came. He hadn’t bothered pulling out, and you didn’t try to stop him as your pussy milked him—his hot cum filling you until it couldn’t anymore, and it spilled out, coating his cock. 

There was a shared silence as you both caught your breath, clinging to each other as your releases went as quickly as they came. It left you with a feeling of relief but also with the gnawing reality that Nam-gyu likely wasn’t going to leave you alone after this. You noticed how he was attached to Se-mi after the race, angry when she didn’t give him the time of day. The thought annoyed you for a moment, wondering how persistent he would be for the remainder of the games.

But as you pulled back, watching the way he leaned back with his eyes closed and panting, jaw sharp and lips parted. You realized there were worse people out there who could be fighting for your attention—he was far more attractive than half of the guys you slept with, less so than the women. 

Maybe you could convince Se-mi to buy you drinks after the games as a thank-you for getting him off of her back.

“Can we… do this again tomorrow?” Nam-gyu asked, his eyes still closed as his cock softened inside you. They cracked open just enough to get a look at you, straddling his hips, a tiny smile pulling at the corners of your lips.

“What makes you so sure we’ll both be here tomorrow?” You asked as your hands lifted to his sharp jaw, caressing either side gently. 

Nam-gyu murmured, “I don’t lose.”

“Hm,” you hummed, your index finger tracing his bottom lip—sending a shiver up his spine, “I guess we’ll see if you can keep up.”

[cybrasigilism]

A Tight Squeeze (Nam-gyu/Player 124 X F! Reader SMUT ONESHOT)

warning: smut, are we even surprised | NOT PROOFREAD | lowercase intended | virginity loss | reader wants that cookie so bad | surprise, nam-gyu’s a bit of a dick in this one | handjob (f receiving) | this is my interpretation of this character, please be respectful even if my opinion on the character differs from your own

character: nam-gyu (player 124)

A/N: been wanting to write a virginity loss fic with him ever since i posted the thanos one a bit ago! this is also me realizing i’ve only ever written smut for nam-gyu, whoops. YALL PLEASE GIVE ME FLUFF REQUESTS FOR HIM IM BEGGING, i swear i am not the goonmaster 😔🙏

MDNI! 18+ content beneath the cut, reader’s discretion is advised

you honestly weren’t fully sure how or why it came out, but news of your virginity caught your team’s attention— at least it certainly caught nam-gyu’s.

you would be lying if you didn’t admit that you actually hoped he would feel inclined to do something about it, so the excitement you felt later when you saw him approaching your bed was expected. you tried to make it seem like you hadn’t noticed him walking towards you, but nam-gyu wasn’t stupid.

“the hell was that about back there?” he asked, you looked up at him, still playing up the act of you totally not wanting him to do things to you during lights out that the guards surely wouldn’t approve of. “what do you mean? thanos asked a question.. i answered.” you responded, looking nam-gyu up and down in a fashion that 100% just gave your intentions away.

he scoffed, looking back to where his friend presumably sat, before kneeling down to meet you face-to-face. “yeah, i’m sure that’s it… and totally not because you want me to fuck you, right?”

you were taken aback by nam-gyu’s forwardness. he saw right through this poorly played-out “innocent” act of yours, and you really ought to have been ashamed.

but of course you weren’t.

you clearly had no shame in the way you squeezed your thighs together right in front of him— was part of you actually expecting him not to notice? “you mean you’d actually want to take someone’s virginity?” you ask, biting your lip as your mind cycled through several impure thoughts.

nam-gyu’s eyes widened, like he was pretending to be shocked at how horny you clearly were. he side eyed some people who were watching on from afar, before returning his gaze to your disheveled state. “you’d be surprised…”

you squirmed a bit in your seat with anticipation, feeling your heartbeat in your throat. you wanted to say something, anything, because you feared that if you didn’t… suddenly the offer would be off the table. your mind wandered to the point where you didn’t even realize you were hardcore staring at nam-gyu’s hands, which again did not go unnoticed on his part.

“what’s the matter?” he leaned in, snapping you back to reality, his voice dropping to a whisper, “realized you started something you can’t finish?”

you could have sworn he’d be able to hear your heartbeat with the way it was pounding in your ears. just as your eyes darted to his lips, that goddamn bell rang signalling thirty minutes ‘til lights out. before he left, nam-gyu leaned in to whisper something in your ear that got those butterflies working overtime in your stomach.

“don’t fall asleep.”

<————————>

it had been a few minutes into lights out, and you laid on your side— impatiently awaiting whatever it was that nam-gyu had planned. why would he have told you to stay awake if he wasn’t going to do something?

the minutes passed at lightning speed in your head as you began to worry that this was all a prank. it wouldn’t be far off for someone like nam-gyu, who you quickly learned was kind of an asshole during the short time you two had gotten to know each other. he and thanos were probably going to laugh their asses off in the morning when they saw your sleep deprived state; knowing that their nasty little plan had worked and—

“fuck, did you listen to a word i said?” you shot up at hearing nam-gyu’s voice behind you, a wave of relief washed over you. the look of panic was left behind on your face, to which he chuckled at— but that didn’t phase you. “thank god, i thought you weren’t gonna co—“

he bridged the gap between the two of you with a rough kiss. you could tell he was doing this to shut you up, so as not to blow your cover— but all your focus on that went out the window when he slipped his tongue between your lips.

you moaned into nam-gyu’s mouth as he laid you back into the stiff mattress, positioning himself between your now open legs all the while. he broke the kiss, taking in the sight of how hot and bothered he already had you.

“shit..” he gasped, his chest heaving ever so slightly, “you’re so fucking horny right now, aren’t you?” you nodded shamelessly, a raspy whine leaving your throat. you didn’t know if it was due to your lack of sleep or not, but it almost looked like nam-gyu was out of his depth with this one— like he hadn’t quite realized just how into him you actually were.

“you do realize how this looks, right?” he tilted his head, running his hands up and down your thighs; causing your body to shiver. “what.. what do you mean?” you stumbled over your words a bit, but given your current situation, who could blame you?

“you look desperate as fuck.” he whispered blatantly, now fully above you, holding himself up with his free arm as he let his right hand wander. “i mean, when we were talking before.. did you really not think i’d see you staring at my hands like that? i know you said you wanted me to fuck you, but some subtlety wouldn’t go amiss.”

you tried to pay attention to the words coming out of his mouth, you really did, but when he slid his hands beneath the waistband of your pants your brain went fuzzy. “how ‘bout you beg for my fingers, hm?” he teased, his hand ghosting over your panties as you squeezed your eyes shut.

“aw, don’t act shy now.. what happened to the desperate little slut i was just talking to?” his words were cutting, at least they should have been, but for some reason the way he spoke down to you made you feel something you’d not felt before. “oh, that’s right.. i almost forgot,” you could see the realization hit him, how could he have forgotten that you were a virgin?

you opened your eyes to give him a somewhat annoyed look, which he shot right back at you. “hey, don’t give me that. you’re pretty slutty for someone who’s never gotten fucked before.”

you wanted to retort with something clever, but you were too focused on wanting nam-gyu to fuck you into next week to be bothered.

“please.. i need it so bad…” you whimpered, bucking your hips up into his hand. he could have taken that and accepted it, but you know that it wouldn’t have been that easy— this was nam-gyu.

he laughed as he pulled his hand away, leaning in closer to you as you cried out at how unfair he was being. “need what? i’m gonna need to hear you say it.”

“need you t’ touch me, please.. i want you s’ bad..” he should have been very complimented, given the fact that he had only kissed you and you were already coming undone for him. without warning, nam-gyu slipped two fingers inside you, almost too effortlessly with how wet you already were.

you tried your best to keep it down, lest you wake any of the other players up with your pathetic noises— but nam-gyu still had to cover your mouth to silence you.

“fuck, at least try to be quiet.. don’t want anyone else to hear, right?” he may as well have been talking to the wall at this rate, your mind only focused on one thing— that being his fingers working absolute magic in your pants. with how fast he was going already, you were sure to cum soon. you both knew this, and of course nam-gyu wasn’t going to let you have it that easy.

you moaned desperately into his hand as he slowed down, rubbing circles into your clit while he did so. “such a good little whore, taking my fingers so well.. you’re sure you’ve never done this before?” he looked at you in a way that suggested he thought you were full of shit about being a virgin. you glared at him, at least to the best of your ability— before he pulled his hand from your cunt to slap your ass.

“usually, when someone asks you a question.. you answer them.” you looked up at him with tears in your eyes, as if you were silently begging him to keep fucking you with his hands. “…but i guess it’s better if you don’t say anything right now, huh.” you cried into his hand, before he decided enough was enough and you found his fingers back where you wanted them.

if this was telling for what was to come later on, than this was going to be a long night for you.

and you couldn’t wait.

═════════════

thank you for reading! you guys are gonna have to pry nam-gyu from my cold, dead hands atp great heavens

as always, any constructive criticism/advice on how to improve my writing is appreciated and requested! have a fantastic night/day lovelies 💋

🏷️: @gongyoosgf @namsgyu @kouzih @strangelife122 @gabbystinks

[meadowfics]

new director

namgyu x f!onlyfans!reader

this is a part two to my namgyu fic linked here

warnings: minors do not interact. 18+, smut. sex work involved and included in this fic. vulgar dialogue. switch!namgyu. switch!reader. vocal namgyu. p in v unprotected. breeding kink.

a year has flown by since you and namgyu became partners, both as a couple who happened to grow as each other's best friend as well. everything has clicked into place.

you’re still fantasygalaxy on onlyfans, your online empire thriving with subscribers who can’t get enough of your photos, videos, and sultry voice calls.

the money’s steady and flowing (big bank ayyy), the work’s fun, and you’ve got it locked down. there is never in-person stuff, just digital seduction from the safety of your penthouse.

namgyu was the one exception, the only guy who’s ever crossed that line from screen to reality. he’s cool with your hustle, never bats an eye when you spend nights filming, transforming into whatever role your fans are craving.

thats one great thing about your boyfriend, he respects you outside of this work. he loves you as y/n, even though he appreciates fantasygalaxy too.

sometimes he is there just off camera, watching you while he’s still pentagon.gyu. he loves throwing cash at your content like it’s a game.

he does it half to support you, half to mess with you, like he’s staking his claim as your number-one fan.

“I gotta keep the algorithm happy,” he’ll joke, but you know he loves it. early on, you both set a hard rule: he stays out of your videos. no appearances, no hints of a boyfriend.

your subscribers, especially the men and gay women, would lose it if they knew you were taken, and neither of you wants to tank your income over some drama.

you’ve built something solid with namgyu.

it’s not just sex, though there’s plenty of that, it’s coffee runs, late-night takeout, him teaching you how to play some dumb video game while you laugh at his nerdy excitement.

he’s your boyfriend, your bestfriend, and it’s weirdly normal despite how you met.

still, you keep your worlds separate: fantasygalaxy is for the fans, but namgyu’s for you.

one night, you’re prepping to film, hyped for a new role-play you’ve been teasing on your page. you’re going full naughty housecleaner—think skimpy black dress, frilly apron, thigh-high stockings, maybe a feather duster for extra flair.

you’re arranging your setup in the living room, candles flickering for ambiance, when disaster strikes.

your tripod, that trusty piece of junk you’ve been meaning to replace, snaps in half mid-adjustment.

“are you fucking kidding me?” you shout, hurling the broken legs across the room. they clatter against the wall, and you’re fuming, pacing like a caged animal.

“this is just my luck tonight.”

namgyu’s sprawled on the couch, scrolling through his phone, one eyebrow raised at your outburst.

“ you good? what’d the tripod do to deserve that?” he’s teasing, but when he sees the genuine frustration in your eyes, he sits up, tossing his phone aside.

“okay, for real, what’s the problem? you look like you’re about to set it on fire.”

you groan, slumping against the table.

“it’s fucked. i was supposed to film tonight and I promised a big post, got everyone hyped, and now my setup’s ruined.” you kick at the broken pieces for emphasis.

“i can’t just hold the phone myself. it’ll look like amateur hour.”

he stands, stretching, and walks over, nudging the wreckage with his foot.

“so what’s the move? you canceling?” you shake your head, chewing your lip.

“no way. i’ll lose momentum if i skip. i just… ugh, i don’t know.” then it hits you, and you look at him, eyes narrowing with an idea.

“actually… you could help.”

he freezes, hands halfway into his pockets.

“help? like, what, hold your props or something? i’m not getting in your videos, y/n. we agreed since I don't need weirdos to come into club pentagon and jump my ass.” you laugh, waving him off.

“not like that, relax. i mean film. hold the phone, get the angles, be my director. you stay behind the camera, no one sees you, no one knows. you could be a friend for all they know.” he blinks, processing, then a slow grin spreads across his face.

“director, huh? you trying to put me to work now?” you step closer, poking his chest, voice dropping playfully.

“come on, it’ll be fun. you get to boss me around for once, and i’ll… make it worth your while later.”

he’s sold, eyes glinting, “deal. but i’m not going easy on you. i want oscar or daejong worthy shit.”

you snort, already heading to change, “yeah, yeah. just don’t drop my phone.”

you slip into your outfit with a tight black dress that barely covers your ass, lacy apron tied loose, stockings gripping your thighs just right.

the tattoos on your arm, those starry swirls namgyu’s obsessed with, peek out as you adjust the straps. you catch him staring as you step back into the room, and he clears his throat, picking up your phone like it’s a lifeline.

“fuck, you look…” he trails off, shaking his head.

“nevermind, let’s just do this before i lose it.”

you tweak the role-play on the fly. instead of a solo housecleaner bit, you pitch a new angle: you’re a maid who’s slacking off, and the

“director”—namgyu, behind the camera—catches you, ordering you to make up for it with a show. it’s perfect. he’s involved without showing his face, just his voice barking commands to sell the fantasy, and you can play off it without breaking your no-boyfriend rule.

“so,” you say, twirling the duster, “i’m lazy, you’re pissed, and i gotta make it right. sound good?”

he nods, already in director mode, “yeah, but you better sell it. i’m not holding this thing for nothing.”

you start filming, and it’s electric from the jump. you saunter over to a table, bending low to “dust,” your dress riding up to flash your panties—black lace, a fan favorite.

you glance at namgyu, and holy shit, he’s struggling. the poor man's joggers are doing a bad job hiding his boner, the outline of his dick clear as day, but you bite your lip and stay focused.

“is this good, sir?” you purr, dragging the duster slow across the table, arching your back for the shot. his voice comes rough from behind the phone.

“not good enough. you’re slacking... make it worth my time.”

it’s hot, the way he’s leaning into it, and you’re feeding off his energy.

you strip halfway, peeling the dress off to reveal a matching bra and panties, tossing the apron aside like it’s an afterthought. you climb onto the table, crawling slow, letting your hips sway as you look at the camera...not at namgyu, but it’s hard not to when you know he’s right there.

“better?” you ask, spreading your thighs just enough to tease.

“keep going,” he says, and you catch the strain in his tone.

“you’re not done till i say so.” you roll onto your back, trailing your hands down your stomach, stopping short of anything too explicit.

it’s a tease, not a finale, and you want to keep the fans begging. you slide off the table, straddling a chair, running your fingers along your thighs, smirking as you hear namgyu shift, probably adjusting himself.

“cut,” he finally says, voice like gravel, and you’re on him in seconds. you snatch the phone, toss it onto the floor somewhere, and crash your lips into his, climbing into his lap.

he groans, hands flying to your hips, pulling you flush against him.

“what the hell, y/n.. stop teasing me?” he pants, already grinding up into you. you can feel him through the joggers, hard and throbbing, and it’s driving you wild.

“tease?” you murmur, biting his lip.

“i’m about to give you everything, baby.”

you slide off him, tugging his joggers down, and his cock springs free... thick, leaking, begging for you. you don’t hesitate, you climb over his lap and sink down onto him right there on the floor, his length stretching you in that perfect, aching way.

“oh, fuck, yes,” you gasp, rolling your hips as he grabs your ass, thrusting up hard.

“fuck you’re such a desperate little slut,” he growls, voice dripping with venom, “couldn’t even wait to post that video, huh? needed my dick right fucking now.”

you laugh, clenching around him, making him hiss.

“talk all you want, namgyu, but you’re mine. i can ride this cock whenever i damn well please and you know that.. you let me every time.”

he’s losing it, hands roaming your back, your thighs, like he can’t get enough.

“shit, you’re so fucking soaked,” he moans, slamming up into you.

“I love watching you work for those losers online, but this? this is all mine.” you lean forward, nails digging into his shoulders, voice sharp.

"ahhh-- fuck! its all yours.”

it’s vulgar, messy, skin slapping as you fuck him hard, chasing that high.

“you love it, don’t you?” you taunt, slowing your hips just to mess with him, “knowing you went fro being one of them to being the only one who gets to fill me up.”

he’s close, you can tell since his thrusts are sloppy, desperate, and he’s cursing under his breath. you’re right there with him, but you try to hold off, squeezing around him to drag it out.

“don’t you fucking dare,” he snarls, catching your game, “don’t hold what i’m trying to get out of you.”

he thrusts harder, deeper, and it’s game over...you’re cumming, a sharp cry ripping from your throat as your body locks up, pleasure crashing through you.

he’s right behind, groaning your name as he finishes inside you, hot and thick, spilling inside of your walls until you’re trembling.

you collapse against him, both of you gasping, sweaty, wrecked. Namgyu's arms wrap around you, loose but warm, and he kisses your shoulder, muttering, “holy shit!”

you laugh, still catching your breath, head resting against his chest, “you’re not bad for a first-time director.” he smirks, already cocky again.

“give me a week, i’ll have you nominated for best actress.” you roll your eyes, but you’re smiling, content to stay there for a minute, his cum still warm inside you, feeling like the world’s just you and him inside of a studio... when in reality it is just your sky-rise penthouse.

masterlist

[namsgyu]

one of namgyu’s guilty pleasures is dragging you with him for a smoke break. sure, it wasn’t the healthiest things he could insist on doing, but you’ve never rejected the offer so he keeps ‘em coming

if you smoke too, namgyu likes to light your cigarette with his own, pressing the two ends together just enough for yours to turn red

during these times, he leaves the conversation to you. he’ll listen to you rant about your day, or to ask meaningless questions like “how were we bought together to exist at the same time?” or “why do i exist?”

on a tiring day, you’ll feel namgyu’s head flop onto your shoulder, a sigh escaping his lips. if you ask him what’s wrong, he’ll never give you a straightforward answer

taking a long drag of his cigarette, he takes his time blowing out the smoke before letting out a half-hearted chuckle “just life” he answers, he always answers like that

inhaling your own cigarette, you can’t help but to just nod at his answer. he wasn’t exactly wrong after all

namgyu also made it into a habit to kiss you when he smokes. he’ll use his free hand to grab the collar of your shirt, blowing his smoke into your mouth as his lips press against yours

he enjoys the way you melt into his touch, almost leaning against him in the process

on more than one occasion, he turns it into a make out session, grabbing both your cigarettes and putting it out so his hands can touch you

your waist, the back of your neck, slipping his own hands into yours, anywhere

namgyu is a bit more handsy than he likes to admit, but you’re not one to complain about it anyway!

☆彡

thanks for tuning in!! feedback is read and appreciated <3

a/n: i just wanted to write something lol! sorry ive been so inactive, life is getting a little hectic? but i still want to write! hopefully this gets me out of my writers block :P i’ll start working on requests soon! thank you to everyone who sent one in <3

tag list

@namgyucat @dgaftilwedie @cybrasigilism @nuttybeans @miss-conjayniality @rohjaewonlvr @ffsjustletmesleep @allmyocsarebritish @namgyushands @celestialmatcha7 @preppyfella @princeofkhaenri-ah @jennie-xqv27777

[arbitrarykiwi]

HI SO LIKE CAN YOU PLEASE WRITE A SMUT OF NAMGYU🙏🙏 like hes your deadbeat baby daddy boyfriend who just stays out and away doing drugs and drinking and comes home at ungodly hours while youre taking care of the baby and one night he notices the little weight you put on after giving birth and how it made your breasts swell and got curvier and shit, n like yall are arguing because he came home really late and youre sick of his shit and its kinda a hate/angry fuck kinda thing?? THANK YOU I LOBE UR FICS

Reckless Temptation

I’m so sorry this took so long!! This was such a fun ask! Admittedly, I’m not the best with topics that involve angst (I love when the reader gets a happy ending and I’m such a ween when it comes to angst endings) so i struggled a bit…BUT I tried my best!!!! It was such a fun challenge for me, I really hope you like it 😩🫶

Warnings: smut (18+) , toxic themes (nothin crazy, he just a bum babydaddy) , toxic relationship , relationship issues , drug / alcohol mention , oral (f receiving) , p in v sex , choking, dirty talk , hate fucking (relatively tame) , rough sex , nam-gyu is a warning himself in this one , creampie , breeding kink , read at your own risk

You don’t know why you stayed or why you continued to let him fuck you over.

Well… you did know…

Every time you looked at the infant in your arms, the one that has her dad’s smile and eyes, you literally couldn’t bring yourself to leave.

You swear sometimes when she laughs, it sounds like his laugh and you want to call him over and show him how precious the sight is- but he’s hardly ever there. He’s never in your shared apartment. He’s never there to help out with your child.

He’s always late coming home- sure you know the club promoting gig he’s got has weird hours but even on the days you know he’s off, he’s not retuning until 3am. He’s also always high, on what, you could never figure it out it changes week by week it seemed. Sometimes he’d smell like a walking ounce of weed when he’s stumbling through the door, other nights his pupils are just blown and he’s jittery.

Admittedly, neither of you planned to have a child. It was a surprise that had you floored. Nam-gyu was the last person you ever thought of who would be a parent, and when it happened, you were sure he was going to leave you when you told him the news. But he didn’t. That had to mean something.

You took care of your daughter, only you. He would show up whenever he pleased to your shared apartment- even though he hardly ever stayed the night he was still on the lease- to drop off his share of rent money (it was never enough), grocery money (maybe $10 if you were lucky), or the occasional thing you had to beg him to pick up the store. He would bitch and complain about how you always bothered him at the worst times, how he has to do everything for you; That’s hardly the case, but he likes to tell you it is.

To say the least, he was garbage, a deadbeat, no good for you. But, there was some days when you would come out of the shower and see him looking over the crib cooing at your daughter- playing with her with a goofy smile on his face. Those moments make all the bad times fade to the background.

Only to be pulled back to the foreground when he stands quickly, stepping away from the crib. He grabs his jacket, turns around, and walks out the bedroom door- shoulder brushing against yours as he pushes past you- muttering a “don’t wait up tonight”.

You know the drill you never do.

Tonight was no different, you had stayed up late dealing with the baby. She was about 4 months at this point so you got into a decent routine even if it did nothing for your sleep schedule. You say sprawled out on the couch, legs up on the cushion and your baby in your arms. Your shirt was up over your shoulder, your baby drinking away happily at the milk that your breast gave. You couldn’t help the way your head nodded every so often as your eyes fought to stay open. At least she wasn’t crying, you thought. You looked down at her with a soft smile, fingers brushing over her cheek gently.

The sound of a car pulling into your driveway makes your head snap up. You rubbed your tired eyes with one hand, groaning, you knew that sound and that meant he was home. Looking to the clock on the TV stand, it blares a vibrant red hue that makes your eyes strain to see the time. 2:57 am.

You groan to yourself, preparing for the drugged out man that was about to stumble through the door. And when he does he’s wearing the usual pissed off scowl he has- like coming home to you and your child was the bane of his existence. You’ve had enough.

He was going to open his mouth to spew some bullshit excuse for being home late, one he’s used thousands of times before, but you stop him by raising your hand. You’re clenching your jaw, eyes wide and threatening as you hiss out a low “Don’t even fucking start.” You adjust the infant in your arms who was starting to slow down on breastfeeding and begin to grow tired.

Nam-gyu scoffs, his scowl deepening, his mouth flops open once again to speak. You cut him off once more- sitting up off the couch and returning his glare with one of your own. “I said…” You seethed through clenched teeth, “Don’t fucking start.” You growl lowly, taking a step towards him, infant still latched onto one of your breasts. “She’s about to fall asleep. I will put her to bed. And then, only fucking then, can you grace me with whatever lousy excuse you have tonight..”

Your tone is one that throws him off, sure he knew he was not a great boyfriend or father, you had every right to be pissed. Normally, you weren’t this confrontational- normally you would sit there sulking when he would come in the door, an adorable pout on your face that he knew wasn’t a cute expression but one of genuine upset and disappointment. He would brush you off telling you he was hungry and wanted you to cook him something.

You finish getting off the couch, it’s an awkward movement as you’re trying not to jostle the baby that had fallen asleep in your arms. Nam-gyu watches, the room is spinning and he’s trying to act like he’s sober because he doesn’t want to get into that argument again tonight- he is far too blitzed to have a coherent argument where he can manipulate it in his favor.

He watches intently, his eyes tracing over your body. You were wearing a large t-shirt and some shorts, nothing new there….but you were fuller. He felt his mouth go dry as you turn and walk down the hallway to the nursery. Your hips were wider and he swore your ass was bigger. The soft, plush flesh of your hips dug into the waistband of the shorts you wore, some of the flesh above the waist band spilling over the slightest bit- perfect to dig his hands into.

You turn into the room, disappearing, presumably putting the baby down in the crib. When you’re no longer in his sight, he lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding. It’s been a long while since you two had been intimate, the already rough relationship was not helped by a newborn, and he was pent up. As shitty as he was, not helping with the baby, not being home, partying and doing drugs- he never cheated. He can’t remember the last time you two had fucked, probably when he got you pregnant, but fuck- seeing your curves, how much fuller you were- he realized how much he missed it. How much he missed fucking you.

You return out the room you put your daughter in, thankful she was a decent sleeper because she was sleeping perfectly in the nursery as soon as you placed her down. He catches you fixing your shirt, getting a glimpse of your tits before the fabric falls back over the swollen flesh. You return back in front of him, standing in the entryway where he was still frozen. “It is two…no, three in the fucking morning.” You hiss out in a hushed voice.

“I got caught up at work.” He scoffs trying to walk past you and head to your shared bedroom. “Bullshit!” You laugh sardonically, “You were out partying with Thanos again weren’t you??” You accuse, taking a step closer to him.

You were partially right, he was out partying- but he was also working. With Thanos rap career taking off and Thanos needing VIP privileges at Club Pentagon, if he was there he was getting paid extra. Sure he did more than his fair share of drugs and came home plastered hours after he stopped working and getting paid- but he was still making money! “I was with Thanos but I wasn’t partying. I get paid double when he’s booked.” Nam-gyu growls lowly, lying through his teeth.

“Fucking hell!” You catch yourself raising your voice and quickly lower it to not wake your baby. “..do you think I’m fucking stupid?!” You’re seething out in a tone laced with venom. “You were fumbling with the damn keys, your words are slurred and your fucking pupils are blown!!” You gawk, he really had the audacity to try you?!

He seemed taken aback, surprised you could even see his eyes and how his pupils were dilated heavily in the low light of the living room. He had to remind himself, you were once like him, partying and down for whatever- that’s how you two met, he did coke off your thighs- you could tell the signs a mile away.

He envied you for that, quitting all the drugs you once did with him a year or so before you even got pregnant. You were stronger than him in that sense, had more willpower than him. You never got sucked back into the scene, even when your child was born you kept stead fast in your ways and weren’t tempted. It was like you thought you were better than him, and you were, but that just pissed him off more.

“God forbid I try and have some fun.” He says as he glares down at you. You go to speak, fuming at this point, “That’s not what-“ you almost want to scream, your words cut off when you see him roll his eyes, “roll your fucking eyes at me again and I will rip them out of your fucking skull.”

Your voice drops, you’re speaking through your teeth and getting up in his face. It would be threatening, he knows you would be the one to do it- but all he can think about is how thick your thighs look against the shorts you wore. He remembers those shorts, they used to fit looser, but now they dig into the plush flesh so deliciously has his mind is going blank. But the way you’re in his face- scolding him like some child, finger waving inches from his nose- is pissing him the fuck off.

His hand darts up in a quick motion that you have no way of intercepting. His hand wraps around your wrist, ringed fingers digging into your skin. “All you do is fucking run your mouth.” Nam-Gyu growls, he knows you have every right to yell at him, to be pissed, but he wouldn’t tell you that. Your eyebrows furrow, even more than they already were. Jaw clenched and chest heaving, you’re staring up at him oh so defiantly even if he was much larger than you.

“And all you know how to do is be a fucking deadbeat.” You counter, getting closer to his face by standing on your tippy toes. “You get to go out and party, probably rail some whores, while I have to stay here with your child and take care of her by myself.” You add. It’s an abrupt shift, he becomes even angrier, pulling you forward into him by your wrist he still holds.

To say he’s enraged would put it lightly- was he a deadbeat? Yes. But, he still tries to give you what he can, club pentagon only paid so much and he had a drug habit he didn’t care to address. Did he stay out and party and leave you at home to take care of the baby? Absolutely, he can’t argue with you on that one. But he never cheated. As fucked up as he was, as shitty as a father and boyfriend he was- one thing he would never do was cheat on you. To him that’s a type of low he always told himself he would never reach.

You fall into him, a gasp coming out of your lips when you meet his chest. When he feels your tits press against him, the enlarged flesh squishing against him- you watch as his eyes flutter shut, he bites his lip and breathes out a large breath, like he’s trying to ground himself.

He is.

He drops your wrist from his grip, hands coming to rest on your hips in a vice like grasp, caging you into him. “Watch your fucking mouth.” He seethes, eyes fluttering back open to glare down at you. “Say whatever the fuck else you want…I have never cheated.” He growls lowly, fingers tightening even harder around your plush hips. He wanted to continue to be mad at you, but the way his finger sunk into your flesh made the blood rush to his cock.

“You’re out late all the time and I can’t even remember the last time you touched me…” You say lowly, all your senses focus on the hold he has on your hips. His hands are cold, the rings on his fingers dig into the flesh and bite at your skin. He’s holding you in place like he’s sure you’re going to run away. “So excuse me for thinking you’re cheating. You also dont exactly hang around the best crowd.” You reason even further, now trying to fight against him and pull away.

He grimaces, he doesn’t even know how it’s possible that you manage to piss him off even further than normal. “You have my location. I’m always at work.” He scoffs dismissively. He wasn’t wrong but when he’s at work, he’s hardly working- he’s taking drugs, drinking, and doing god knows what else- you’ve seen the pictures he’s in the background posted on Thanos timeline.

“That’s not what I mean and you know it.” You seethe, trying to yank your hand out of his grasp yet again. It’s a futile attempt. “Okay! So you’re at work!? Where’s the fucking rent, huh?!” You say, voice raising, he’s a day late. He looks at you like you’re crazy and reaches into his back pocket and tosses a wad of cash over onto the coffee table- all while keeping you trapped in his grip. “Still late-“ your works are instantly cut off, “Wrong.” He mocks, reaching back into his pants pocket to pull out his phone and show you the date on his phone.

He was right. But it wasn’t your fault, your days had mixed together because you get no sleep with the baby and your child’s father comes home at 3am every day! God forbid you mix up your days. He also was no stranger to paying you late. You normally wouldn’t care about the mix up, maybe even own up to it- but today it just adds validity to his manipulative argument. “You’re still home at 3 in the fucking morning, you reek of booze and your pupils are blown!” You growl, not even caring that the day was wrong. You simply don’t care anymore. “And you’re doing all of this while I’m home taking care of our child!”

You’re leaning into him, getting up in his face with knitted eyebrows and barred teeth. He’s far too fucked up to deal with this, with you- because he knows you’re right. He never wants to face his issues, he never has wanted to, and every day you attempt to make him confront how shitty he was little by little, most of the times without even knowing it. You had always been too good for him, he knew that. He was lucky that you stayed and gave him a thousand chances instead of walking out on him. Maybe tomorrow he would address it and make a change for once in his life. But, right now, his head is pounding, the room is spinning and your hissing growl of a tone is only making his headache worsen.

His grip on your hips tightens, and he lowers his face so very closer to yours. His eyes are dark, angry, but there’s an odd glint of hunger in them that you haven’t seen in ages, it makes your body heat up in ways that due to not having felt it in so long, if now feels foreign. “You seriously don’t know when to stop fucking talking.” He growls lowly, like an animal about to feast on its caught prey. When he speaks his lips nearly brush against yours, the feather light contact tickles and sends electricity straight to your lower stomach. His voice has a hiss to it, like a viper, it should scare you but it doesn’t; it makes you hotter.

You two stand like that for a moment, the only sound you could hear was the sounds of your breath mixing with his. Every time the both of you heaved an angry breath, the hot air would mix between the two of you. Neither of you broke the other’s gaze, trying to win the silent stare off that started.

Nam-gyu breaks first, his eyes dropping to your chest, watching the rise and fall of your enlarged breasts from under the shirt- his resolve is out the window. He’s on your lips in an instant. You’re letting out a muffled sound of protest into his mouth, fighting against him and trying to pull away. But with the grip he still has on your wrist and the frantic movement of his lips keeps you still. You find yourself melting into it- you missed his kisses. Missed him.

As much as you want to pull back and continue to fight with him-you can’t. You relax into him, lips moving with his- almost rivaling his eagerness. When he feels you give in, his hands drop to your waist, nails biting into your plush flesh over the fabric of your shirt. You’re panting helplessly into his mouth, so desperate for the attention you’ve been deprived of for months. He’s pushing you backwards, guiding you further into the living room.

In a mess of lips and spit, you’re falling back first onto the couch and he’s following you, coming to straddle your thighs- hovering over you. His hands are back on you in an instant, running up your thighs and squeezing. His lips are back on yours, it’s a messy kiss that reminds you of how you two were when you first met. It’s sloppy, full of spit, and oh so Devine. You’re arching up into his touch, his cold hands running up your sides and then back down to your shorts. He wastes no time in gripping the waistband and tugging the fabric down your hips.

He’s pulling your shorts off you hastily and you help kick them off, whining into the kiss. Your lips don’t part once, he’s sucking your tongue into his mouth expertly, he knows exactly what to do to get your mind to go blank. He’s rough, hands gripping and kneading at your flesh like he can’t get enough.

He pulls away from the kiss to lift your shirt over your head. He wastes no time in pulling the fabric over your head and tossing it to an unknown corner of the living room. When the cool air hits your bare skin you’re overtly aware of your bare form. You two haven’t been intimate since you got pregnant. Your body has changed in ways that admittedly you weren’t fond of. A wave of self conscious that rolls through you when you see Nam-Gyu above you, eyes flitting down your naked from like he’s trying to memorize you.

It makes you want to cover yourself- so you do. Your arms fall over yourself to cover your breasts and stomach, shielding yourself from his gaze. His brows furrow and a growl resounds from his throat. You cant even fight him when he grabs your wrists and pulls your arms away from your body, pinning them to the couch. “Don’t you dare fucking hide from me.” His voice is low, almost threatening, and does nothing to help the wetness that grows between your legs.

“Yeah…that’s it, ma.” He rasps, nodding his head slowly, eyes trained on your body. His hands let go of your wrists, you know better than to move your arms back over your body- he would get up and leave you hot and bothered if you disobeyed- he lets out an accepting hum when you keep your arms by your sides.

“Mmm…beautiful fuckin tits…” he coos in a low, gravely tone, his hands reaching up to grasp at the doughy mounds of flesh. He’s kneading your breasts, you can feel the way his cock is straining against his pants, twitching and growing against your thigh with each movement of his hands. “So swollen now, huh?” He says as he leans down, his mouth latching onto one of your nipples.

You’re so sensitive, it’s almost like an electric jolt that runs up your spine. He hums into your skin when he feels your body shake against him. The breast that isn’t being attacked by his mouth is being kneaded in his hand. He’s pinching your nipple, rolling it between his fingers to bring the bud to a stiff peak. You’re helpless underneath him and his mouth is relentless. He can’t get enough of your enlarged tits, he’s switching his mouth to the breast that once was in his hand- wanting to give the same amount of attention to both of the picturesque tits before him.

He pulls off your nipple with an obscene ‘pop’, the sound only adding to the overwhelming feeling you’re experiencing. All this attention after going months without it, it felt surreal. You knew you should push him off and scold him, kick him out, but it feels so good- you just can’t bring yourself to push him away- it feels too fucking good.

“Mmm,” he hums against your skin, you can feel him begin to grind the forming erection in his pants into your leg as he continues his relentless onslaught of bites and kisses, leaving blue and purple patches that blossom across your skin in his wake. His hands are moving across your body, groping at the doughy flesh like a cat kneading a fluffy pillow. “Gotten so curvy, pretty thing….” He mumbles, biting down particularly hard right under your breast. “Such a good mama…” his lips tickle your skin when he speaks.

You can hear how his words are slurred, his hands are jittery, he’s definitely on something and you know you should stop this and not let him swoon you like every other time he’s stumbled in the door fucked up late at night. He’s doing this to soothe your anger, to get you off his case. At least that’s what you thought.

That wasn’t his motive, although that reasoning could apply- he was really doing it to get your guard to lower. You accused him of cheating, scolded him like a child in his own home, you were gonna feel his anger. And he was strategic, manipulative even, you should be aware of it you’ve been with him long enough…but for some reason you’re not. He looks down at you and he sees you softened, you’re panting under him, pupils dilated like his now, hands gripping the fabric of his shirt like you’re trying to ground yourself.

He makes an insanely quick, rough, combination of movements- shifting one of his legs between your legs, pressing up into your cunt, and one of his hands darts down to grip your neck right under your chin, awkwardly forcing your face upwards to meet his gaze more directly. “….but you don’t know when to shut the fuck up.” He has a sadistic, mocking grin twisted across his lips.

You let out a pathetic, surprised squeak that falls into a moan. The rough fabric of his pants pressing into your throbbing pussy has your eyes crossing and fluttering shut. You reach a hand up to grip at his wrist, opening your eyes to glare up at him with some measly attempt of a scowl, trying not to let him win so easily, trying to not give him the satisfaction of your docility.

“Yeahhh…” he mocks, a wide grin on his face, his hand that grips your neck and jaw wiggles your head around to further his mocking, like he’s rubbing something in, “keep that smartass scowl on your face. So fuckin’ sexy when you’re angry.” He hisses, his free hand comes down and roughly slaps your breast, his eyes watch the flesh recoil and ripple under the impact, and when you arch into the touch and let out a pretty whimper his hand is groping at the plump flesh harshly. Of course your defiant scowl has faltered.

He lets out a low laugh and trails his hand down your stomach, his grip on your neck tightening ever so slightly, “see…can’t even keep it up…ya ain’t mad…” he coos in an annoying, sardonic tone. His hand releases your breast and runs down your stomach, nails dragging into your skin just the slightest bit. His hand grips at the flesh of your stomach- like he’s admiring it, basking in the feeling of your softness in his hand. “No~ you’re not mad…” he continues, hand running over your pubic bone, thumb catching the top of your pussy, just above your clit- pulling up the slightest bit.

His view of your cunt is shrouded by your thighs clenching around his leg that is between them. You’re heaving against his touch squirming your hips into his hand, silently begging for more. “Not mad at all…just needy. Need me to play with your pussy, hm?” He says in a low growl, his thumb inching the slightest bit closer to your clit- still not where you needed it most. You’re ashamed of the little resolve you have left, you’re still trying to twist your face into an angry scowl while writhing under his hand. It’s like your hips have a mind of their own, desperately rolling into his touch even though the rest of your body is telling you to stop this and have some resilience to his ways….but you simply can’t stop.

“You’re acting all mad like ya hate me…...” He says, leaning down closer to you, his hand that was still pinning you to the couch by your neck squeezing more. He shifts his knee, pressing it deeper into your cunt. You let out a wanton sigh in response, your eyes screwing shut as your hips grind mindlessly into his leg. His other hand moves off your pubic bone and runs up your leg. When he gets to your knee he’s shoving your legs apart and parting your other leg open with his knee that was grinding up into your cunt.

It’s such a fast motion that you have no option to fight him. Your glistening pussy is now on full display for him to see. It’s shameful, your folds stick together with your own syrupy arousal, thick streams of wetness seep out of your entrance and begin to drip on the leather couch under you. Nam-gyu’s eyes are captivated by your cunt, he’s biting his lip and breathing heavy like a lion about to eat a bountiful feast of meat- animalistic, primal. “Ohoo~” he says with a mocking tilt of his head, “yeah, you can act mad all you want…but, she’s not mad at me.” He says, his fingers sliding inwards and down your spread leg, pulling your folds to the side to see you fully.

“Ohhhhh….” He drawls out, licking his lips at the sight. His hand on your neck loosens its grip and trails down your body to mirror his other hand, spreading you completely. You’re on full display, there’s no hiding the effect he had on you, there’s no denying that your anger has long since been overrun by lust and need, and he’s staring so hard- it’s so embarrassing. He can see how your cunt clenches around nothing, quivering as if to further show your bashfulness. “Already fucking soaked, what a slut. Barely even have to touch you and your needy pussy’s already crying f’me.”

Your eyebrows turn upwards, you’re biting your lip hard enough to draw blood, trying to keep your noises suppressed. With your lips pulled apart by his thumbs, your puffy clit is on full display. Nam-gyu is cursing to himself, pulling away one hand to hastily undo the button of his pants and unzip the zipper. He’s pushing his boxers and his pants down his thigh to free his aching cock from its confines. He’s thick, veiny, and has a mean upward curve that no matter how hard you try, you can never forget how good it makes your pussy feel.

He pumps his dick a few times, groaning at the sensation. He stops to return his hand back to your inner thigh, thumb brushing up and down in quick motions over your clit. Your hips are immediately canting upwards off the couch, a gasp is pulled from your throat and your nails bite into the couch- threatening to tear the fabric. He would normally bask in that reaction, relish in it, thumb your clit over and over until you’re singing like a song bird for him. But, that was normally; it wasn’t now.

“You better keep your hips still, brat. This isn’t a reward for you.” He barks, looking up at you with dark, narrowed eyes. “I’m jus’ takin whats mine, ‘s not for you.” He scolds, you know he’s still set on punishing you. And for some reason, you let him. You’re looking down at him desperately and panting, eyebrows furrowed together in concentration as you try so hard to keep your hips still so you can get the attention you so desperately need. It’s a downright sinful, completely and utterly desperate expression, your flushed cheeks just the most perfect accessory.

His scowl turns into a wicked grin when he sees the last bit of resilience you have crumble completely and you turn into a pathetic heap on the couch. “Mhmm…” he nods slowly, “S’ what I thought. Just a lil needy thing ain’t ya?” You whine at his words. He’s speaking in a mean, sardonic tone that makes your mine spin. You don’t even think about it, but you find yourself nodding, letting out a muffled ‘mhm’ in hopes of getting on his good side.

He seems to accept your meek response because he’s settling down onto the couch, lowering his face until it’s level with your cunt. You’re gripping the couch and biting your lip until it’s bleeding, trying to keep your hips still. His breath fans over your folds causing a soft mewl to fall from your lips. Your head falls back onto the armrest of the couch as he licks a wide strip up the entirety of your cunt.

He’s groaning into your pussy when he gets his first taste of you. It’s been too long since he’s been buried tongue deep in your sweet cunt, he doesn’t know how he’s gone without it for so long. He doesn’t ease you into it, he doesn’t slowly coax soft whines from your throat- no, he’s delving in and eating you like a man starved. His tongue is vicious, licking through your folds, teasing your entrance, only to trace back up and twirl in mind-numbing figure eights against your clit.

“O-oh my god…” you breathlessly moan, thighs closing around his head. His eyes roll back and flutter closed when he feels the soft, thick flesh of your thighs tighten against his head. He wraps his arms around your thighs, dragging you up and down his flat tongue, slurping down every drop of arousal that seeps from your pussy. His lips wrap around your clit, sucking it into his mouth. The sensation makes you jump and moan out a broken call of his name, your hips grinding down on his tongue in a pathetic attempt to seek even more pleasure.

When he feels your hips cant upwards, chasing his tongue he’s growling into your pussy. Hands splaying across your lower stomach to push your hips down- a warning. “Keep fuckin’ still.” He hisses, his words vibrating against your clit. Nam-gyu makes a show of eating your cunt. He’s messy, making obscene slurping sounds as he coaxes more and more sticky arousal from your spasming walls. This wasn’t for you, this was for him. He was going to enjoy the heavenly flavor of your cunt his way. You want to grind against his tongue, become impossibly closer to him and sink his tongue deep within your walls- you know if you do, you’ll be going against his orders. He’s deliberately making this a challenge for you. He wants you to disobey him. Wants you to give him even more of a reason to fuck you into complete submission.

When you feel his tongue begin to prod its way into your entrance, you’re keening and bringing a hand up to cover your mouth. You muffle your wrecked moans as he tongue fucks you. It’s such a devine feeling for him, your cunt clenching around his tongue, the flavor of you covering his tastebuds, thick thighs clenching around his head, pussy wetting his chin, and nose breathing in your scent as he grinds it into your clit. All of it reminds him of why even after all the horrible shit he’s put you through, he’s never cheated and he always returns home to you. He wants to savor it, draw it out. Maybe you’ve learned your lesson and he can be nice- give you both what you want.

But he can’t, because you’re sobbing out muffled pleas from behind the hand that covers your mouth and jerking your hips up, swiveling them down on his tongue to try and drive him even deeper into your walls. You don’t even mean to do it but when you realize you were going against his orders it’s too late.

His dark eyes peer up at you through thick lashes, you can feel the sadistic grin that twists across his lips against your sopping folds, you know you fucked up. You pull your hand away from your mouth, “N-no, no, ‘m s-sorry. Can’t help it! Y-you’re not making it easy!” You’re pleading with him as he’s pulling away from your cunt. “P-please! I n-need it.” You try to beg more, trying to get back on his good side and get his tongue back against your clit but he doesn’t accept your offer

Nam-Gyu sits back up on his knees, his hands moving up to your waist and squeezing, “I gave you more than enough chances…” he coos, eerily sweet, “was eating your sweet cunt good, wasn’t I?” He scoffs with a raise of his eyebrow. You nod frantically, your hands reaching down to cover his, running up his arms, trying to sweeten him up, “Mhm! S-so good! ‘S why I couldn’t keep still!” You praise, batting your eyelashes up at him.

You think for a split second that you managed to win him back over, a relief washes over you when you think you’re going to be granted the salvation of his tongue on your throbbing pussy once again. But his grin widens and his hand slide down, grasping at your hips with a primal grip.

“Well, since you want to act like a bitch in heat…” he says, the low timbre of his voice sends shivers violently jolting through your whole body. You’re suddenly picked up off the couch by your hips and flipped over. You inwardly scold yourself at how you almost instantly fall into a position on all fours with your back deeply arched. You hear him scoff at your eagerness, “…then you’re gonna be fucked like a bitch in heat.”

When his sentence finishes you can feel him drag the bulbous tip of his cock between your folds, mixing your arousal and his pre-cum into a stick mess that coats your pussy. You let out a shaky breath, you can feel your heartbeat in your throat. Pushing your hips back, you whine, trying to sink him into your heat. But you weren’t the one in charge here…he was.

He was going to make sure you felt every, single inch of his cock sink into your tight cunt. And he was going to savor you desperately trying to fuck yourself back onto his cock like you have no other thought on your mind other than to be fucked.

“Already makin’ such a mess on my cock. You were so mouthy earlier…” he begins to slowly sink into your cunt only to pull all the way back, “…so bold, all up in my face…” he pushes back in to the tight ring of your pussy ever so slightly, “…so feisty.” And with that, his cockhead finally slips into your cunt. It makes a sickening, wet sucking sound as your pussy greedily sucks him in. “Now look at you.”

A moan is ripped from your throat, the extensive period of time that you have gone without fucked and the devilishly slow entrance of just his tip into your sopping walls already has your toes curling. A moan is ripped from your lips as you drop your chest fully onto the couch, your back arched sinfully deep for him, pressing him deeper into you.

“‘S just the tip and you’re already creamin’ around me like a slut…” He muses, leaning forward a bit to grab both of your arms and cross them behind your back. Both your wrists are restrained by one of his hands. You gasp as your pulled upwards, your face pulled off the leather of the couch. “Heh…. I’m gonna break ya sweetheart…”

His hips become flush with yours in a split second, his cock is balls deep within your cunt. The sudden intrusion has you letting out a silent sob. Instantly, you’re so very full. Nam-gyu is stretching you around him, molding your pussy to the shape of him, removing the thought of leaving him from your mind completely. How could you when he filled you up oh so perfectly.

He stays balls deep inside you for a moment, bringing his hips to a slow grind. “Yeahhh….that’s it… ya feel how deep I am?” He asks, his voice rough and breathy, “Only I can give this pussy what she needs…” he growls, pulling his cock all the way out and then immediately slamming right back in. You’re crying out, eyes crossing and your vision goes hazy. “I’m the only one who can cum in your greedy cunt….” He says, repeating the same motion. When he’s back to being balls deep inside you, he’s leaving over your back and bringing his lips ring next to your ear, “you carried my child.”

He’s emphasizing the word “my” by rolling his hips against your ass, grinding the tip of his cock against your cervix. You hated it, but he was right, the moment you carried and gave birth to his child- you were his. From the moment you two met- you were his.

You’re moaning helplessly, gasping an incoherent mix of his name and curses, you’re becoming boneless in his grasp. It feels so fucking good. He gives you no time to adjust before he’s sitting back up and pumping his cock in and out of your tight cunt. The thrusts are vicious, mean even, his thick girth is stretching you impossibly wide and your pussy welcomes him openly, greedily sucking him in.

“Mhm…there you go…she missed me didn’t she?” Nam-gyu rasps, using his grip on your wrists to drag you back to meet every single one of his hard thrusts. His eyes are focused downwards, he’s entranced by the ripple of your ass everytime it comes back to meet his hips. You’re much thicker, curvier, softer than before. Pregnancy had changed your body in ways that sparked a primal hunger inside of him.

You helplessly sob out, the overwhelming pleasure completely taking over your body. Your hips are pushing back to meet his thrusts, trying to sink his cock impossibly deeper into your tight heat. He laughs from above you, realizing your desperation for more. “Greedy fuckin’ thing…” he growls, it’s a dark, gravely tone that sends goosebumps down your arms, “what, ‘s not enough for you?” He chides like you’re giving him a challenge, you can hear the sadistic grin that is spread across his lips.

You’re gasping, shaking your head frantically “n-no ‘s e-enough! ‘S so good!” You try to plead with him by praising his efforts, fearing the impending overstimulation that is about to be thrown on you. He’s drawing his hips back until just the tip of his cock is inside you, he’s humming like he’s thinking to himself. “Hmm…” he lets out, just trusting his cockhead inside your sopping pussy, “you can still talk…so I don’t think it’s enough.” You can hear the mocking pout in his voice, teasing you further.

Nam-gyu lets go of your wrists he was holding behind your back, hands finding their spot on your hips, squeezing the doughy flush in his fists. He’s pile driving his hips flush against your ass in one thrust, sinking balls deep into your gushing cunt. Instantly, he’s stretching you deliciously, pushing into your spasming walls until the tip of his cock is flush against your cervix. A wrecked sob rips through your throat and you’re falling forward onto the leather couch.

He leaves you no time to gather yourself, his hips draw back until just the tip is inside you and then thrusting balls deep inside your warm cunt in rapid, devious strokes. As much as you wish it wasn’t true, he knows your body like the back of his own hand, he knows every little thing that makes you tick, he knows just how to make you cream around his cock- and he wants to make you a mess. He’s driving his thrust upwards at a mean angle, making sure every thrust is hitting that sweet spot deep inside you. All you can do is moan out pathetic babbles of his name and praises.

“Yeahhhh, that’s it…” he coos mockingly, his hips slamming into you at a brutal pace, “‘s all you needed huh? A good fucking to calm you down.” His tone is hushed, his hands are leaving a bruising grip on your hips. He can’t keep his eyes off the way your ass jiggles with every thrust, the way his cock disappears between the soft flesh and reappears covered in your syrupy arousal.

Admittedly, he was right, you did need this. It had been months since you two fucked and the way his cock was stretching you out, hammering against the deepest spot within you, had your body so overwhelmed. Your hand is clasped helplessly over your mouth, muffling the moans that spill from your lips. His grip on the globes of your ass is nearly painful, using it as leverage to pull you back onto him.

“Missed this fucking pussy..” he growls from behind you, “reminds me of why I got you fucking pregnant…” he rambles on, “gripping me so tight, s’impossible to pull out.”

His words make your eyes roll into the back of your head. Every thrust of his hips bullies his cock up against your cervix in a way that has you gasping for air. You’re sobbing incoherently against your hand, every drag of his thick cock reminded you of how you even got to this point in the relationship- the dick was insanely good.

He releases one of your hips to slap your ass, it’s a resounding smack that stings and has the flesh recoiling under the contact, “fucking hell….” He muses, one of his hands coming up and brushing his hair back out of his face, his eyes never straying from the view of your ass slamming against his hips. “Fuck yourself back against me..c’mon, wanna see it.” He rasps out.

He slows his thrusts, nearly stopping completely. Chasing a high you haven’t felt in ages, your body complies. You immediately begin thrusting back, impaling yourself on his thick cock. It’s a delicious, devine stretch that has you biting the palm of your hand. You repeat the motion, speeding up with every wet slap of your hips against his. “Good fuckin’ girl.” Nam-Gyu is praising.

You can feel yourself getting closer to the delicious release of your orgasm, it’s quick, embarrassingly so, but you’re stretched so full and every time you sink him balls deep into your tight heat- a mind numbing wave of pleasure is sent up your spine. It’s an addictive feeling that you keep chasing desperately without even realizing it. You’re speeding up the backwards thrust of your hips, every time you meet his thighs with your ass a wet ‘clap’ resounds through the room.

“O-h fuck, that’s it… j-just like that. D-don’t you dare fucking stop.” Nam-gyu hisses out, a hand coming to thread itself in your hair and form a fist. He cranks your head back, a silent scream falls from your lips as you keep up the motion of your hips, sinking your cunt down onto him. You couldn’t stop even if you wanted to. “Look at that fucking ass…” He muses, praising the body you were worried he didn’t even like.

He’s leaning forward a bit, his head hooking over your shoulder so his lips were right by your ear. His new position causes the movement of your hips to still, he picks up the slack by rolling his hips into a slow grind. “Gonna cum so f-fucking deep in your cunt.” He growls into your ear. You can hear that he has his teeth clenched, he’s speaking through his teeth like you and your pussy would be the death of him. “O-ohhhhhh, you like that… can feel you squeezing me..y-you want me to cum inside?” He pants, the hand in your hair turns your head to the side so he can leave harsh bites along the column of your neck as he grinds his cock impossibly deeper into you.

“C’mon answer me.. wan’ me to cum in you? Get you pregnant again…” He mocks, “…keep ya like this.” He growls lowly, his hand releasing your hair to grip at the fat of your hips and lower stomach, he’s even punctuating his words with a devious roll of his hips that grinds his cock into your g-spot. A wanton whine falls from your lips. Your back arches even more, deepening into a sinful curve that has Nam-Gyu spinning.

You should say no, call him some name and tell him to go fuck himself. “Nnghh… f-fuck y-yes!” You cry out in a hushed plea, you can’t help it. You need it. trying to thrust back onto his cock. You can feel how wet you were, making a mess of the backs of your thighs and the couch below you. “I-inside please!” You sob, eyebrows knitted together in a pleasured expression. You need so badly to once again experience the feeling of his thick cum filling you.

With both hands holding your hips he’s drawing your body back violently, impaling you on his girth. Every thrust is echoed by a lewd, sticky, ‘schlick’ sound that only proves how much of an influence he has on you. His cock has a mean curve that reaches so deep within you it has you seeing stars. The warmth of your orgasm beginning to blossom over your body and tingle deep within your cunt.

Every time he draws back his hips he’s dragging his cock out of your sopping walls until just the tip rests in your fluttering entrance then driving his hips forward to sink balls deep into you. You know you’re about to cum, embarrassingly fast. Moan after moan falls from your lips as your eyes cross and roll back in pure bliss. “T-that’s it, make a mess on my cock f’me.” Nam-gyu growls through clenched teeth, one hand reaching around to rub quick circles on your clit. The feather light touches that glide across your throbbing bundle of nerves is enough to send you over the edge.

“Ohmygodholyfuck.” You babble out incoherently, fingers digging into the fabric of the couch as you fall head first into a violent orgasm. Your pussy flutters around his cock, squeezing him like a vice. “Mhmm…f-fuck yeah that’s it…” He hisses, his thrusts becoming sloppy, his other hand on your hips drops under you to grab at your swollen tits in frantic motions, the feeling of the doughy flesh in his hands jiggling with each of his thrusts is all it takes to drive him over the edge.

He’s working you through your orgasm with skilled fingers, your body shaking against his as he cums deep inside your cunt. You can feel it, it’s so much. It fills you even more than his cock already did, coating your gummy walls in its milky white color.

He thrusts lazily a few more times, making sure he properly fucks his cum into your spasming cunt. Your body is shaking and jolting violently against the couch, you can hear the obscene, wet, ‘plap’ of the mixture of your cum and his falling out of your cunt and hitting the sofa below you. The room is filled with alternating heavy breaths and the smell of sex. He slides his hands up and down your sides before resting back on your hips and slowly grinding his cock into you. He can barely bring himself to pull out, the warmth of your cunt is literally sucking him in. He can hear your overstimulated whines of protest with each slow roll of his hips and it drives him wild.

Eventually, he too gets overstimulated- your cunt is simply too good, his personal drug he’s addicted to, his own vice (but he’s never tell you that)- he’s pulling out his softening cock with a hiss, sitting back on his heels to watch his cum slowly seep out of your pussy that still is gaped with the shape of his cock. He groans, eyes rolling back into his skull as he tries to imprint the visual in his brain.

He collapses back onto the couch, one hand on your hip to make you follow suit, gently landing back first on his chest. You try to catch your breath, limply turning yourself over to fall back onto him. When you tuck yourself into his side his arm drapes over your waist. He places a kiss on the top of your head that’s so quick and gentle that you almost can’t feel it. You nuzzle his head onto his chest, you can hear the rapid thrum of his heartbeat. You can’t form words. All you can do is let out a shaky sigh. It’s quiet in the room, only sound you can hear is your heaving breaths that eventually fall into sync with each other.

“You have got to change.” You say, the edge in your voice just emphasizes that you’re hanging on by the thinnest thread possible. You want this to work out- you do- you love him and you adore your child. You want to be a regular family.

“I know.” He says, his voice breathless. His arm tightens around the curve of your waist, pulling you into him like you might suddenly get up and run away-because you might- he can tell with your voice it’s different this time, you’re serious. And he wants to change, he does…he just doesn’t know if he has it in him.

I hope you guys enjoyed this one 😙😙😙 I really appreciate all of y’all’s support it means so much!! I’m working through the requests I have and whipping up some noice fics! Yall have fantastic minds 😩 all the requests are so scrumptious

Im trying to gather all my marbles after being sick so the queue I had goin is a little wonky. im working through it and will update yall on said queue of requests next post! Love yew guys !! - kiwi

[dyingswanpavlova]

Happier than ever

Part 1

Pairing: Nam-gyu × Reader × The Salesman

Warnings: Drug Usage, Overdose, Death, Violence, Unhealthy Relationships, Manipulation, Suicide, Mentions of Sexual Activities, Mentions of Rape, Domestic Violence, Domestic Abuse, Mental Health Issues, Anger Issues, Depression, Long Backstory, Minors do not interact!

Nam-gyu and you were a couple for the last eight years. But after you decide you had enough of his anger issues, you leave him and try to be happy on your own. Oh, how naïve you are.

Author's note: Okay, everyone.😩 I know you're waiting for the next part of "Your girl" and trust me, I am, too! I'm sorry that I haven't come up with it yet, but I needed to get my mind off of it for a moment, because I don't want to just write anything and publish it like that - the story means too much to me. I can't publish it unless I'm happy with it, but I promise you, I'm working on it. Until then, I started to furiously hit the key board and this happened. Whatever this is, it is Part 1 of it and I'm doing a Part 2, I just don't know when yet. I love you! 🤍 Lana

Loving Nam-gyu wasn’t exactly the easiest thing in the world.

In fact, it was almost impossible on most days.

But there was a part of you, a thing, a quiet voice – something that needed to be reassured, that felt like maybe you were the problem.

There had been good days, hadn’t there? Your birthday and the way he woke you up with pancakes every year. Of course they turned out horrible and were barely edible. They were raw on the inside and somehow, he still managed to burn them. But he made them for you. The memory still made you smile, despite everything.

Then there was the day you had your big ballet performance. You had spent so many months rehearsing, trying to be perfect. You went all Natalie Portman on that performance. Since the moment you’d been told you got to play Odette, you were fire and flame, spending every waking moment trying to be everything you pictured in your head. It was hard, very hard even. But you had the great hope that, if maybe you did well enough, they would come.

Your family would come and watch. They’d finally show you that they did indeed love you, that you weren’t just a burden or an accident. They would come and they would be proud of you. Your father would set his work phone down, your mother her pills. They would be there. For you.

But of course, they didn’t. You should have known better. It was your own fault, hoping and praying for something that was never going to happen. You should have known.

And still, the moment the curtain lifted and you glanced along the rows and rows of people, you felt disappointed. But you didn’t feel disappointed like normal people would, no. It was you after all. You felt devastated. You felt all of your creativity leave your mind. Your body slowly forgot the choreography. Your eyes glistened with tears. And your life was over.

You had your own issues. He had his anger. You had your world endings.

That was until the door flew open after everyone was already seated, waiting for the show to begin. A few heads turned and your gaze quickly flashed towards the now open door, revealing the face of the mysterious newcomer. He was out of breath and his hair was a mess, his cheeks glowing red and the look in his eyes pleading.

It was Nam-gyu.

You had just had the greatest argument of your life so far, throwing around dishes and screaming your lungs out at each other. Not even twelve hours had passed since then, so you were more than sure that he wouldn’t come. After all, he was the least reliable person you knew, alongside your family. And that fight had been particularly bad. You actually didn’t expect to ever see him again.

But there he was, his appearance disheveled and his eyes pleading with you. Pleading with you to forgive him, pleading with you to dance.

Dance.

You remembered the way you felt. The way your disappointment suddenly turned into something different, something hopeful and warm.

Something good.

He was good.

He was yours.

And you were his.

In that moment, there was nothing else. Everything around you faded into a dark cloud and all you could focus on was him and the way he stood in the middle of the audience, staring up at you. The world was quiet and everything smelled like flowers. The perfection you were striving for was suddenly there and it had nothing to do with your performance.

It was a slow dance, slow and sensual, between your souls.

Until suddenly the music started and your body remembered the movements again.

And you were indeed perfect.

Unfortunately though it wasn’t always like that. Most of the time, he was simply complicated. When he wasn’t drugged out of his mind, he was angry. Not at all the time – but easily. All you had to do was say the wrong thing and he’d explode. And you’d explode right back, right into his face.

“I fucking hate you!”

“Shut the fuck up, you dumb slut!”

“Who are you calling a slut?! You son a bitch!”

“Say that again!”

It always ended the same way. You sobbing on the floor, him slamming the door shut and disappearing. That were the good fights.

The bad ones were different. You couldn’t count the times you had been forced to take shelter in the bathroom, quickly locking the door, too afraid to let him even close to you. Of course you knew how to fight back. You didn’t let him get away with slapping you, oh no, you kneed him right in the balls so he’d know better not to fuck with you. He’d normally collapse and the fight would be over. But sometimes, on especially bad days, he got that look on him.

It wasn’t careful or hesitant. No, it was murderous and terrifying. You always knew there was something dangerous about him. That was probably what drew you in at first. But this…It was different. When he got that look, when the drugs clouded his mind like that, you were truly afraid of what he might do. And so you locked yourself in and listened to the way he pounded against the door, ready to break it down. So far, he hadn’t. A part of him was still in there, even when got like that.

But you didn’t want to push your luck.

After eight years of up and down, back and forth and through the gates of Hell, you finally left him for good. At first he probably didn’t believe it. After all, you had pulled the leaving card a million times before. But somehow you always ended up back in his bed, with him fucking your brains out and calling it making up.

But this time, you meant it. It had been a pretty normal Tuesday. You were at work, waiting tables and cleaning up after your mindless customers. It wasn’t the best job in the world, but it paid the bills – albeit, barely.

After your father left and married a woman hardly any older than you and you found your mother on the bathroom floor, cold and stiff, her eyes wide and her chin and hair covered in foam and puke, you decided couldn’t do this anymore. Couldn’t be that anymore.

You moved in with Nam-gyu. It started off well at first. He was as cute as ever, when he was sober. Sure, you had fights already, but they were mostly trivial. Yelling was involved, throwing furniture around as well, but he never got violent with you so far.

He found a job, as did you and you paid your apartment together. It was tiny of course, but it was enough. You bought groceries and washed laundry. You even had some spare money to buy furniture and decorations. It wasn’t much, but it was yours. You did everything the way you always pictured it.

You had been with Nam-gyu since you turned seventeen. You met back in school and immediately fell in love with him. He had been so sweet. Acting overly confident and arrogant, of course, but it was just a front which you immediately realized. Under all that he was actually rather silly. He made you laugh without even trying. Even he seemed surprised by how good you two matched. So far he’d been going through life, acting like everyone was beneath him. But in reality, he wasn’t popular. He was a bully. He was mean, with a cruel streak. But never to you. No, when someone dared to speak up their mind against you, he was there, ready to break their jaw. You formed a friendship of sort. He was protective and extremely possessive, while you were caring. His family was a bunch of assholes, just like yours was and neither of you had any real friends.

Most of your friends were other dancers and neither of those were really sentimental. Sure, it was enough to go out for a salad sometimes, but you really weren’t one for bulimia and cigarettes. Most of them were, unfortunately.

You loved food. You loved to eat and you appreciated every bite. You’d grown up rather lonely on your own, praying every night for a sibling or a real friend. Someone you could talk to, about real problems. Your ballet friends though? Whenever they asked you how you felt, they didn’t actually want to know. They were just being polite.

Nam-gyu was just as lonely, though he wouldn’t have ever admitted it. He had friends, who were to no one’s surprise, also a bunch of assholes. Some of them were just bullies, others were straight-up rapists.

“What do you mean, you changed your mind? Are you dumb? Shut the fuck up and take it. You agreed to this!”

Nam-gyu wasn’t. It was another thing he wouldn’t have admitted to out loud, but the thought of fucking someone while they were out of it was something he wasn’t after. A thing that really turned him on was to see the pleasure on the other person’s face. The moans, the sighs. He wouldn’t get that if he just made them take it. And so he didn’t. But he tried to keep a straight face, when his friends shared their immoral stories of last weekend. He tried to laugh, when they spoke about the way the girls curled up in self-hatred after they left them there, their cum leaking out of them.

That was until one of the girls ended up killing herself.

She had been super sad and melancholic for as long anyone could remember. She was rather quiet and no-one really spoke to her. She wasn’t weird or anything, just really shy. That was enough to get bullied. She was an obvious virgin and rather closed-off. A good challenge. A great bet.

So, one of his friends placed a bet with the others. Fuck the girl.

“No way that weirdo is letting you anywhere close to her.”

And she didn’t, at first. She didn’t trust anyone around, because people normally made fun of her. But that guy, who went by Nic, was a real good actor. He didn’t walk up to her and just made advances. No, he played shy around her. Sweet. Funny. He managed to tickle a smile out of her. A laugh. And he didn’t just do it once. He did it for days. Weeks. Two months. He played her boyfriend. Her sweet, shy boyfriend. Until her front slowly crumbled and she fell in love with him. Deeply. So much that she actually decided to give Nic her first.

According to Nic it had been nothing out of the ordinary, but Nam-gyu knew it was more than that. He could read the people around him fairly well, and he could also see the way Nic’s pupils dilated, the way his heart skipped a beat, whenever his sweet, little girlfriend was around.

But his friends, his friends, they were constantly at his back.

“Did you finally fuck her?”

“Did you stretch that weird little cunt, huh?”

“Don’t tell me you’re falling for that Wednesday Addams bitch.”

Nic had a reputation to uphold. And so he did what he deemed necessary. He had sex with her and then he dumped her. But not like any normal person would. No, he made fun of her in the worst ways and ended up sending her nudes to anyone who was interested.

The same nudes he had begged her to send him, to trust him, for only his eyes.

And the next day, the gruesome news were heard over speaker.

She was dead. Jumped off her apartment building, right into her death.

Nic had a mental breakdown. No-one else from his group really cared. No-one except for Nam-gyu. Nam-gyu spent the rest of the day in his car, staring down at the steering wheel and trying not to throw up.

You had heard the news of course and you were devastated. You hadn’t known the girl, but you had never been mean to her. You actually remembered a few interactions you had. You knew there had been something going on between her and Nam-gyu’s friend. But naïve, little you had had the hope that it wasn’t a trick. How stupid you had been.

You spent the rest of the day looking for him, but he was nowhere to be found. Right when you already thought maybe he wasn’t at school at all, you saw his car. He was inside and God, he looked horrible. With red-rimmed eyes and shaking hands, all day. You tried your best to comfort him, but it was futile. He felt guilty. Someone was dead. And maybe, just maybe, if he had intervened in time…

You tried to make him understand that it wasn’t his fault, not entirely. He never spoke to his friends again.

You’d later find out, that was the day he took his first injection. So far all he had been doing were mushrooms and weed, but Hell, who hadn’t?

You spent more and more time together, because he firmly ignored everyone who was so damn fucked in the head. He was trying to be good, he was trying so hard. Life hadn’t been easy on him, not at all, but he still tried.

A month later, you had your first kiss. Another three days later you had sex. It was your first time and he was being surprisingly gentle and considerate. You loved thinking back to it, because you didn’t regret it at all. No matter what else happened between you afterwards, you could never regret giving your virginity to him, because it meant so much to you. And it seemed to mean even more to him.

Two years later, it was safe to say you were made for each other. Even long after being out of school, you were still a couple. He still got these angry outbursts sometimes, but you tried to understand him. He had grown up, feeling unseen and unloved by anyone. As did you. You weren’t angry per say. But you got angry, when he did. You had these desperate mood swing. And whenever something didn’t go your way, you felt like the world was ending. You felt everything intensely.

Love was great. It was all-consuming. You loved him in the same way he did. You adored him. Anger was different. It felt suffocating. Sadness wasn’t sadness, but depression. And despair was enough to nearly kill you.

You tried going to university, but that didn’t work out, because your father left and so you had no chance to pay the tuition. Nam-gyu never even bothered to try, because he knew he would fail anyway, but he tried whatever he could to make your dream work. You wanted to work with animals, heal them, help them, do whatever you could to make someone’s life better. But despite all your – and his – efforts, it didn’t work out. It was simply too much. He was heartbroken when you were forced to leave school, because of your selfish prick of a father. But it was alright.

You’d find another job. You could still make it in life, even without university. Everything was good.

That was, until you couldn’t afford your dance practice any longer.

That was heartbreaking.

One day, you came home after a long day of playing cashier, only to find your mother had stolen all the money you had saved so far. She took it to buy pills or whatever else. You couldn’t even be mad at her, because she lay passed out in the doorway to her room.

You had no money. And all your dreams were dead.

By the time that happened you were far into twenty-one, so you knew that life was cruel and you turned more and more bitter.

Nam-gyu was simply angry, but there was not much he could do. His parents threw him out at nineteen, so he had been paying his own rent since then. He tried speculating with cryptocurrency, but that didn’t work out. He played it down, but you knew he lost quite the amount of his own savings.

A year later your mother died and you finally moved in together. So far you hadn’t been able to leave her on her own, but now that she was gone, you couldn’t stand to live in the same place where she had died. The cemetery of what could have been. Countless dour memories, not a single one good.

You had never had a particularly good relationship, but she was your mother nonetheless. The sight of her dead body and horrified face, it haunted you in your sleep. You spent more than one night, waking up screaming, sweating and clutching the linens. Luckily, Nam-gyu was there to catch you, before you ever managed to fall into the deep pit that was your mind.

He managed to calm you down somehow, every time. He was perfect. The perfect boyfriend.

Until he wasn’t.

You hated when he did drugs, especially so after what had happened to your mother. And so he said he wouldn’t, but it was obviously just to pacify you. You always noticed when he did it nonetheless, you knew the dazed look in his eyes, the paleness of his skin. Whenever he refused a meal, it was obvious to you. Normally, he’d choke down everything you cooked like a starved animal, but there were days when he picked at his food and that was always the first indication.

His short responses, his temper, suddenly so easily flared. It didn’t take long for your first real argument to break out. It was fine, up until the point when you saw his hand twitch. Obviously, you shot him a murderous look, daring him. If he dared to hit you, you’d break his fucking jaw.

And he refrained. For then.

Things went mostly normal, until the next fight. That time he wasn’t so gentle. Things got out of hand and he pushed you against the wall, smashing your head against it in the process. For a moment, you were simply stunned – and even he seemed to be. He stopped before he could cause any greater damage.

Things went between good and bad, it was a constant battle for dominance. One day was good, the next day horrible. You couldn’t even look at him without earning a harsh comment. You’d ignore him firmly for the rest of the day and eventually he’d come crawling back, begging you to let him back inside the bedroom. He didn’t mind the couch, he just missed you. And somehow you always forgave him, far too easily. Sometimes he did change for a while. Surprised you with flowers or his sad attempts at cooking. Every time he messed up a scrambled egg, you couldn’t help but get weak. He was so silly, it was endearing. Yet at the same time, you knew there was something dark within him. Most likely the drugs, but you could never tell for sure.

Maybe this was just who he was.

Things got better and worse again, until one night, he snapped. You had a fight about one of your co-workers, who he considered a threat. You never understood it, because to you it was so obvious that you never wanted anyone else. Despite your problems, you stayed fiercely loyal to him. You loved Nam-gyu. And a part of you still believed that in the end, things would turn out good. Maybe they would, right?

But that night was bad. He got so furious and when he yelled at you, the walls seemed to shake. You were normally so eager to fight back, so strong, but that day something was different. You were on your period and just a few hours earlier, you had met a dance friend of yours. She told you, she was sure that, if you had stayed, you’d be famous by now. But she wasn’t kind about it. She was subtly looking down at you, shaming you for the way your life had turned out. It made a tight knot form in your stomach and you felt your resolve slowly crumble. All you wanted was to cry, but even that didn’t work, because you came home to a furious Nam-gyu.

Your shoulders slumped and you refused to look at him, which only ever made him angrier.

You didn’t see the slap coming, but once it happened, you couldn’t forget it. Couldn’t forget the anger and the disappointment that welled up in you. When you looked up at him, you expected the tiniest bit of regret or guilt, but there was nothing. He was too deep in his bubble of anger and substance, to see clearly. He got more and more furious and you knew; if you didn’t hide then, he’d do something worse. It was the first night you hid yourself away in the bathroom, one of many to follow. You always told yourself it were the drugs. He was so sweet when he was sober, so gentle and loving. You kept telling yourself, things would be good one day. They would turn out well. With time and patience.

Until you snapped.

You were at work, staring off into the distance. You had been out of it all day, because you spent the previous night locked in the bathroom, until he finally passed out around four in the morning. You snuck out and made your way to your workplace, where you opened more than three hours early. You had nowhere else to go. No family, no friends, no one. Only you and your pain. All day you spent trying to cover the dark marks on your wrists, but no one seemed to care anyway. People went about their own lives and problems and you were just their co-worker, their waitress.

You stood silently, watching an elderly couple whose order you had just taken. They were so sweet, like they came right out of a movie. He held the door open for her and pulled her chair back. He caressed her cheek and she never flinched when he reached out his hand for her. They smiled at each other with such a tenderness, it brought tears to your eyes. That was the exact moment. That was the moment you realized you didn’t want to continue on living like this.

You wanted more. You deserved more.

You made your way back and gathered most of your things while he was still at work. Of course it wasn’t the most intelligent approach, but it was all you could do. You knew, the moment you sat down and tried to explain to him that you were going to leave him, he’d find a way to convince you to stay. It had been eight years, after all. Eight years on and off, eight years up and down. Drugs, violence, lies – at least he never cheated on you.

You’d keep that in tender memory of him. As well as the countless times he had comforted and fought for you. All the times he made you laugh, all the times he made you feel loved. The greatest sex you would ever have, no doubt.

But you still packed your things and left like a ghost. After eight years.

He tried to contact you of course, the moment he came home. But you took your paycheck and went to a motel. Whenever he tried to find you at work, you hid in the kitchen. Your co-workers tried to calm him down, to tell him that you didn’t work there any longer, but he saw through the lie. He got loud and furious, which you could kind of understand. You stayed in the kitchen, crying to yourself and feeling incredibly guilty, but you didn’t ever come out.

He kept coming, but it got less and less frequent. From what your co-workers told you, he seemed less and less like himself. The thought broke your heart and nearly made you go back.

You were constantly in your head, making more and more mistakes at work, until your boss’s patience finally snapped. When you messed up the third customers giant bill, he fired you. You instantly panicked, because you were sure, now you had to go back.

You even drove around in your car, trying to get a glimpse of him in the apartment. But to your horror, you didn’t see Nam-gyu in the window. It were other people, some couple actually. And when you tried to call him, the number wasn’t available. Suddenly, he was a ghost and you were knee deep in horse shit.

It didn’t take long for your money to go and so you ended up panicking. You had to leave the motel soon and if you didn’t get a job – you’d end up homeless. Which was as good as dead.

A few days later, after you realized that you seemed to have no special talents and that no one really cared to hire you, you sat at the metro station. You had only one option left or so you thought. Le girls girls girls. You were a dancer. You were graceful. You were too good for this.

But it was all you could do. After all, the girls didn’t have to indulge in any immoral transactions. They were just dancing, right? Fine, in light clothing, but still dancing. You could do that.

You were deep in thought, your eyes closed and your head leaned against the wall behind you, when you heard someone’s voice.

“Care for a game of Ddakji?”

This was when your life took a dark turn.

You eyed the handsome stranger with suspicion. It was super odd. A man going down the path of middle age, slicked-back hair, wearing a suit and a briefcase on him.

And he was asking you to play a game with him?

You frowned and glanced around.

“I don’t know what you want, but you won’t get it from me.”

He smirked and tilted his head to the side innocently.

“I don’t want anything. Just a little game. That’s all. You got something to win here. I got money.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “I’m not a fucking hooker.”

He smiled again, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “And I told you, all I want is to play a game. Are you scared?”

That made you bristle. You knew the game and you fucking hated it. You were fairly good at playing at, but you didn’t care for this idiot’s audacity. You were about to snap at him again, when you caught sight of the money. Your eyes widened and you sank back against the wall.

“I don’t have any money.” You murmured back.

“Don’t worry. You can pay with your body.”

Your head shot up and you were ready to lunge at him, but he held up his hands in a placating gesture. “I have no intention of fucking you.” He said calmly. “So, I’ll ask again. Are you scared?”

You crossed your arms and got up, giving him a dirty look.

“Get to it, son of a bitch.”

Your eyes fluttered open slowly. You had trouble adjusting your sight to the unnatural, neon light. The smell was odd, somewhat disinfectant. Something was really wrong.

You slowly stretched and turned your head, only to see you weren’t alone. That was enough to nearly make you shriek. You sat up quickly enough to get dizzy. Next to your own bunk was a woman who stared at you through her cat-eyes. She smirked devilishly as she lay on her side.

“Your fate is sealed. There’s no way you can dance your way out of this.”

You tried to ignore the way your heart raced in your chest. This had to be some freakish co-incidence. You took your gaze off her, only to realize you weren’t alone. Countless people surrounded you, some of them awake, others still asleep. They all wore the same green tracksuit, just as you did.

You took a shaky breath and carefully swung your legs over the bed, heading for the ladder.

What, in God’s name, was this? And why did you agree to it?

You only remembered how ashamed you felt and how good the prospect sounded of not having to dance half-naked for strange men.

But was this really better?

You glanced around in the hope of…Of what? The situation was far too fucked up.

The fact that they got you here unconsciously, getting you dressed…

You wanted to throw up. You stumbled through the great hall, hoping to get some answers to your questions, but that hope quickly got crushed.

These were the real strange men. Dressed in pink suits, wearing masks which covered all of their faces and even their voices weren’t their own. Whatever this was, it wasn’t a fun game, you suddenly realized.

That Ddakji playing motherfucker had deceived you.

You lost the first round, which resulted in him slapping you. And that slap, which hadn’t really been a gentle one, awakened some kind of beast in you. You didn’t know what it was, maybe the memory of getting slapped and hunted down your own apartment on a regular basis. Whatever it was, you didn’t lose another round. He gave you money and money and money. But you didn’t want his fucking money. You wanted revenge.

You kept winning, because nothing else was possible. And by the end of the game, he smiled at you while he handed you the damned card.

But right before he turned crawled back into the pit of Hell where he had come from, you called out to him.

“Hey, motherfucker.”

He cocked a brow and regarded you with amusement. “Are you still mad about that tiny, little hit? Come on, you took it like a champ.”

“Then you should, too.”  You slapped him with an intensity, you didn’t think you’d ever possess.

He looked at you like a statue, obviously ready to lunge at and murder you. But he hid his murderous intent behind a well-rehearsed smile.

“That one was free.” He said calmly. “And if I ever do see you again, I want a return match.”

He left and you were left with the card.

And there you were now. This wasn’t some childish game of Ddakji.

No one showed their face. You knew what that meant. Something was wrong – and you were in trouble.

You were about to leave the hall and take part in the first game, following after the others. You wouldn’t even have noticed, had you not bumped into him full-force.

When you pulled back your head, ready to apologize, you froze.

There he was. Your Nam-gyu. Staring back at you with wide eyes, behind them a mixture of something akin to surprise and fury.

“What the fuck?” He hissed.

He rushed forward and grabbed your by the shoulders, backing you up against the wall. Your eyes widened and you tried to push him back, but he was driven by something far stronger than both of you.

“Nam-gyu?” You breathed out.

He frowned deeply and stared at you incredulously.

“What the hell are you doing here?!”

“I didn’t-“

“Oh my God, I’m going to kill you.” He growled. “Where were you? What’s going on with you? Are you fucking-“

“Is there a problem here?” At first, you didn’t see the guy behind him with his ridiculous hairstyle and pouty lips. Immediately, you hated the sight of him.

“Fuck, she’s my-“

The purple-haired guy gave his shoulder a squeeze. “Whatever, man. We should get going, huh? We’ll be late for the game.”

He eyed you in an odd way, but you pushed it down and used the moment to free yourself from Nam-gyu’s grip and run out, rushing after the others and hiding in the crowd. He attempted to follow you and even called out to you, but you were already gone.

Fuck, you thought.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

[fear-is-truth]

WE FOUND LOVE IN A HOPELESS PLACE

pairing — NAM-GYU x f!reader. warnings — toxic love. angst. mention of drūgs & sex. english isnt my first language / word count 1420

a/n : here’s a playlist to compensate

NAM-GYU was never the man you should’ve fallen for, and maybe that’s why you did. there’s no ceasefire. loving him is a siege, a never-ending war, and you’re always the one waving the white flag, bleeding surrender into his hands. but he lures you back into the trenches with the smallest moments of disarmed humanity, gestures that feel colossal only because they’re so rare—

his head resting in your lap, your fingers threading through his hair. the slight crack in his voice, almost boyish, when he asks you to hum something, anything to drown the chaos in his head.

his hand in yours when the drugs have wrung you both dry, your bodies trembling, drenched in sweat. and for once, he’s not trying to control you. he’s just holding onto you like a lifeline.

nam-gyu is the match you struck yourself, knowing full well it would burn you to the wick. destruction wrapped in allure, and you let him destroy you because he makes you feel. drunken nights blur into each other, smudged by pastel-colored pills and lines of white powder, leaving a haze too thick to see through.

sometimes, it’s better to feel pain than to feel nothing at all, and with him, the pain comes sharp and vivid, carving itself into the parts of you that numbness could never reach.

he’s sitting fully clothed in the bathtub, the curve of his spine pressed into the porcelain. his knees are drawn up to his chest, one arm slung lazily over the edge, and an unlit cigarette dangles limply from his lips. the dim bulb above sputters weakly, bathing the tiles in a lurid, piss-yellow glow. he looks at you like he always does—bored—but the disinterested slack of his mouth is betrayed by the dimple carving into his cheek. he’s waiting. for you.

eyes narrow into slits, sharp and dark, like he’s measuring the space between you and him. you hover in the doorway, lighter in hand. the cigarette bobs as he smirks.

“you just gonna stand there?”

his voice is edged with disdain, like he’s daring you to leave. you don’t leave. you kneel by the tub, the coolness of the tiles biting into your knees. close enough now to see the faint sheen of sweat on his collarbone, bruises just below it. you don’t ask what happened.

the lighter flicks once, twice, before it catches, and you lean in, holding the flame to the tip of the cigarette. his lips curl around it as he inhales, eyes locked on yours. he exhales to the side, smoke curling against the tiled wall. you pluck the cigarette from his mouth and take a drag, the bitterness scraping your throat like broken glass.

“don’t get cocky.”

his chuckle is soft, lilting with faux innocence. “cocky? me?” he leans forward, elbows resting on his knees, your faces inches apart.

“that’s funny coming from the girl who keeps crawling back.”

you blow smoke directly into his mouth, watching his pupils blow wide as he inhales.

“don’t flatter yourself.” the words fall flat on your tongue, a lie you both recognise. the nicotine burns as it settles in your chest, addictive in the way his presence is—killing you slowly, but it’s all you want.

he’s all you want.

nam-gyu grabs your wrist, pulling you forward until you’re practically in the tub, on top of him. his lips crash into yours, tasting of ash and anger. his teeth scrape your bottom lip, and you dig your nails into his shoulders, both of you are trying to take something from the other and neither of you is willing to give.

when you finally pull away, gasping, nam-gyu stares at you like he’s searching for something—an answer, a reason, anything. his hand lingers at the nape of your neck, fingers curling into your hair.

“you’re too good for this.”

you laugh, sharp and bitter.

“don’t lie to me.”

he doesn’t. not about this.

you sit there in the jaundiced haze, staring at each other. nothing’s fixed, nothing’s said, but it doesn’t matter.

this is what you are.

sometimes, though, he makes you forget how fucked up the rest of it is. like when he drags you into the fluorescent glow of a run-down arcade after wandering the city, the drugs still humming in your veins. your feet ache, your throat is dry, and you want to crash somewhere, but he pulls you forward, muttering something about “just one thing.”

he stops in front of a claw machine filled with stuffed animals, shoving coins into the slot. you lean against the side, arms crossed, watching him maneuver the joystick with a concentration you haven’t seen since his last poker game.

“what are you doing?”

“winning,” he says simply, his tongue poking out slightly as the claw descends. you’re about to chide him for wasting money, but the claw jerks, grabs a small bear by the arm, wobbles as it retracts, and finally drops it into the chute. he grins, a boyish smirk that doesn’t match the sharpness of his features, and hands the bear to you.

“for you.”

it’s stupid how your chest tightens.

“dumbass…” you mutter, but you take the stuffed animal from him anyway.

later, you’ll lie in his bed, the bear clutched to your chest, your body still buzzing from the euphoric high of sex. the sheets are tangled around you both, skin slick with sweat, the lingering warmth of his touch on your back. the pleasant ache between your legs is still fresh, and you feel a wonderful cocktail of everything—desire, confusion, a hint of something almost resembling affection, even though you know it’s all so fucked up. he’s asleep, am arm draped lazily across your waist, and you tell yourself that everything is good.

or there’s the night he buys you tteokkochi from a street vendor, even though you’re both broke and he doesn’t spend money on anything but vices. it’s late, and the air is cool. you sit on the curb, legs stretched out in front of you as you eat, the spicy sauce staining your lips.

“you didn’t have to do this,”

“shut up and eat,” he replies, spearing a piece of rice cake and shoving it into your mouth.

because for all his faults, nam-gyu has a way of making you feel like the only person in his world. and in those fleeting moments, you almost believe you could save each other.

almost.

being in love with nam-gyu is living on a fault line, constantly bracing for the ground to split open beneath your feet and swallow you whole. it’s the dizzying heights of his affection—the way his gaze softens when he’s not too far gone to let you in. and it’s the freefall—the screaming matches, the slammed doors, the nights he disappears without a word, and the sick, creeping dread that maybe this time, he won’t come back.

but he always does. not with apologies, never with promises to be better. he shows up with that lopsided grin, the one that wraps around your resolve and strangles it. you’ll forgive me, because you love me.

and he’s right. you do.

and you hate him for being right.

he never breaks you in one clean snap. it’s slower, crueler—he feeds on your forgiveness, on how easily you bend under his will. but he bleeds too. the rare times he allows you to touch the soft underbelly of his pain, the nights he holds you so tightly you almost can’t breath.

you hate him for that too, for needing you so much it drowns out the parts of you that should have walked away.

nam-gyu is a liar, a manipulator, a hurricane you walked into with your eyes wide open. but for all the wreckage he’s caused, he’s never lied about one thing: he loves you. and you love him, too—not despite the ruin, but because of it. because he’s yours, and you are his, and love is the only thing strong enough to make the devastation feel worthwhile.

he kisses you, but you don’t pull away.

you could pull away, though. you should. but you don’t. because for all the ways he’s ruined you, you’ve ruined him too.

a love that tastes like blood, like the copper tang of wounds you keep reopening just to feel him. it hurts, every second of it, but it’s the kind of hurt you’d crawl through glass for, just to hear him say your name.

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘯𝘰 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘴. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘨𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘧𝘧 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬, 𝘴𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥. — WE FOUND LOVE by RIHANNA ft. CALVIN HARRIS

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