#or is he and Dick is just being kind

[ehliena]

Dick: Nothing Bruce Wayne does or has done surprises the Bats anymore.

Wally: Right, like wearing a Nightwi--

Dick: The list includes: Clark Kent, Oliver Queen, Selina Kyle, Talia Al Ghul, possibly Lex Luthor on a dare...

[welcometogrouchland]

Disgustingly messy and crusty sketch dump but I couldn't get my own terrible theory out of my head and ended up making a bunch of sketches about it. Also at the end a bonus dickbats and Damian doodle bc I was reading an issue of their Batman and Robin run (IDs in Alt)

[poppy-metal]

just thought of being scumbag patricks pretty little girlfriend and saying you love him mid-stroke and he groans, puts a hand over your mouth because you dont mean that shit - he's gonna pretend he didn't hear it, cause hes bad for you and you falling in love with him would be fucking awful for you both - doesn't stop him from fucking you deeper though, immediately after you say it. like the words have a lasso affect and his hips crash into yours, not parting this time, just grinding his cock inside - way more intimate than he usually allows. biting his palm, wrestling your mouth from under his palm in defiance like the brat you are so you can pant and whine another breathless "i love you - i love -" he fucks you harder until the words fade out into moans. acting like his balls aren't twitching to unload inside you the moment you said those words, like its just to shut you up, the desperate slam of his hips, and not like the confession means anything.

[farshootergotme]

Sometimes the previous Robins forget they don't use the name anymore and this has caused a few misunderstandings in multiple occasions.

Batman: Robin, you'll cover my back.

Nightwing: On it, B.

Batman: ...I said Robin.

Nightwing: Wha- Oh.

Nightwing: Robin, stay out of this!

Red Hood: You don't tell me what to do!

Robin: He's talking about me.

Red Hood:...

Nightwing: Welcome to the club.

Alfred: If the news are to be trusted, I believe Robin was shot in battle?

Tim: What? No, I was-

Damian: A bullet it's nothing to me, Pennyworth.

Alfred: Then removing it will be a walk in the park. Now, the medbay is waiting, master Damian.

Damian: Tt.

...

Alfred: And master Timothy...?

Tim:... In my defence, Red Robin is basically the same thing.

Alfred: It's quite all right, sir. You wouldn't be the first one.

Batman: Robin!

Nightwing: B?

Red Hood: What do you want?

Red Robin: Yes?

Robin: Tt.

Red Hood: Damn it.

Red Robin: It's Red Robin, okay? Red.Robin. ShitIthoughtIwasoverthis.

Nightwing: Well, this is awkward...

Batman:

Batman: We'll talk about this after patrol.

Bonus:

Steph: You know, Cass, I'm starting to think being Robin for only two months was for the best.

Cass: Agree.

Duke: Second that. I knew telling Bruce I wouldn't be another Robin was a good idea.

[ghost-bxrd]

Love what they are doing now with Wayne Family Adventures.

Bruce is being a jerk, but unlike mainstream, the narrative is definitely not on his side.

He gets called out on it, and it's made clear he is overreacting due to his own messed up mindset.

Yup! And they’re making absolutely clear the readers know that Bruce’s actions (and assholery) are because he’s terrified for his kids. Not because he’s “got no time for teenage rebellion” or the I-dont-need-a-son-i-need-an-obedient-soldier shtick

Yes he’s being a jerk about it, but honestly I’m not sure I would handle the situation much better after trying to get the most important people in my life out of the line of fire only to have them show up at literally every location of interest 😭😂 like, that man is stressed 🤣

[torchstelechos]

Say what you will about the DC timeline but we all know the truth, Jason Todd uses AO3 and has an account despite not understanding these new fangle technological advancements (hes fucking with Tim he understands what cookies are, it pisses off Tim more than anything else Jason has done)

[latenightsundayblues]

Lawrence squirmed uneasily; the mere sight of the individual across the room had initially managed to knock the air out from his lungs and squeeze his heart mercilessly, a breath held tightly within his chest tinted with the taste of bile. His lips parted absentmindedly when his vision finally cleared itself seconds later and allowed him to take a good look at the man, who, unsurprisingly, was definitely not Adam Faulkner. It's just the new janitor. Gordon wasn't sure whether the pang he felt afterwards was one of relief or disappointment.

Although the uncanny resemblance still disturbed him greatly, he could now identify various signs that should've tipped him off to that sooner (other than Adam being, well, dead); slightly longer hair reaching the base of David's damp neck-- Gordon had managed to catch his name in the tag on his uniform--, a gnarly red line ripped along his cheekbone altering the path of the sweat drops rolling down his forehead and a sarcastic tone of voice without the intention of lightening the mood, but tainted with a certain degree of hostility. Gordon would've risked calling it defensive, even.

He tried not to think too much about the stranger as he drove back to his lamentably empty apartment, to no avail.

[p1nkshield]

Stephanie: Do you think Plastic man is chewy? Like a piece of gum? Or maybe even rubber?

Jason: Gross!

Tim: Why would you even think of that?!?

Bruce: NOT AGAIN.

Stephanie, Jason and Tim: ... What?

Bruce looking pointedly at Dick: Nobody is chewing on him again!

Dick: 😅

Robin!Dick: Hey Bruce! Bruuuuuuce!

Bruce: ...?

Robin!Dick: Do you think Plastic-man would let me chew on him if I asked nicely?

Bruce: ...No.

Robin!Dick: I think he would!

Bruce: Please don't try.

Cut to robin successfully chewing on Plastic-man's arm

Bruce: Drop it.

Robin!Dick: grrr

Bruce: You don’t know where it's been. You’ll get sick.

Plastic-man: Hey! I'm plenty cleanly! Also who is this kid?

[himejoshiangels]

yall cling to duke as "the normal one" like your lives fucking depend on it. like why go to such lengths to ignore everything incredible abt him canonically in favor of kicking him to the side bcs you headcanon him as boring. like do you understand how not quirky cute and progressive yall sound. You would never do that to your faves and frankly I think some of you are just afraid that he might just be more interesting that whatever made up version of your favorite batboy you have in your mind

[necrotic-nephilim]

jealousy really is the driving force of DamiTim as a ship. love that for them. love how Tim has the Robin mantle ripped away from him and he has to suffer the jealousy of watching Dick and Damian bond. how possessive over Dick Tim can be, to have him stolen by Dick.

even more so though, is the jealousy from Damian. how on earth do you cope when you finally get to be Robin, a role you've convinced is your birthright, and no one really likes you? every prefers the Robin who came before you? Dick regularly reminds you that he can always go and call Tim back when you act out? like the complex Damian has over Tim is unreal. Tim, who was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and had everything handed to him his whole life. he never had to struggle or fight for his place like Damian did. Damian has spent his whole life fighting and proving himself, and yet he can't ever seem to truly claw the mantle of Robin away from Tim. even when Tim lets it go, becomes Red Robin, they seem to share it. Tim can slip back into the role of Robin whenever someone like Dick or Bruce need him to, because *he's* the Robin who they need. he's the Robin who was able to find Bruce. he's the Robin that Ra's wants an heir out of. he's the Robin who even Jason respects. in Damian's eyes, everything Damian has fought tooth and nail for, was handed to Tim.

so of course he's going to react to Tim with violence and aggression, especially after finding out Tim has contingency plans for him. no matter how much Damian proves himself, he's never going to be enough, especially not to Tim. and so his deep refusal to see Tim as family, to acknowledge Tim's legacy is all driven by such an angry jealousy. Tim understands aspects of Bruce's legacy that Damian doesn't, like the need to sweet talk and play nice with the elites of Gotham, even if they're corrupt. they exemplify different aspects of Robin, and the aspects that Tim exemplifies are the aspects that Damian knows he'll never fully understand and therefore holds such a deep contempt for. he wants to fight criminals, not play nice with politicians. Tim understands the side of Gotham that's utterly foreign to Damian. if anything, he represents that side of Gotham, to Damian. a pretty little rich boy who's nothing but a know-it-all and not a real son of Bruce. he can't be a Wayne. he can't be Damian's family.

and all of that angry jealousy leading to unhealthy obsession turned a weird, angry crush from Damian is just my bread and butter. that is how DamiTim should be. to me. Damian obsessed over hating Tim Drake so much he accidentally ends up sort of in love with him and that only makes Damian angrier. because he can't prove everyone right by *also* liking Tim. he can't let Ra's win like that, because frankly why wouldn't Ra's be delighted by Damian and Tim getting together. and it builds and builds with angry passive aggression towards Tim that culminates in angry hate-fucking-that's-not-just-driven-by-hate. love and hate are always viewed as opposites in shipping and i think they're the same intense passion just in different directions. and for the best ships, they're very intertwined. what is DamiTim is not the peak of that. "i put so much of myself into hating you i had no choice but to fall in love with you somewhere along the way" core. love that bleeds into hate and hate that bleeds into love. "you make me so angry i regularly passively try to kill you but not with any real effort because who would i obsess over if you were actually gone" core. murder attempts as a form of courting. contingency plans to take each other out as a love language. they're unwell.

[sunkillerlovechild]

its 3am and im currently plague by the thought of what would the most generally accepted headcanon if dc never revived jason

cause like we know the fandom is not just letting him stay dead, thats really not even an option, but what would be the general consensus

like they aint no way that we would go to be crawls out of his grave, talia snatches him and dips him in the pit

like the pit would definitely be one of the techniques used but i dont think it would be the most generally accepted one

also who would the people make jason be as a person, like would he just kind of keep his personality from before, would he still come back with major anger issues and the need for blood??

some of my theories as to what might have been headcanoned:

- bruce consumed by grief goes a bit tim drake on this one and tries to clone jason, succeeds but its not really his jason, so it probably just fucks him up even more and everyone around him with him

jason becomes and unfortunate casualty of this situation, he just wants the man that made him to love him, but he will never actually be his dead son

this whole thing probably leads to clone jason becoming a genuine villain not just an anti hero like canon red hood

- flashpoint, barry comes back and suddenly jason is alive again

this can either go the nice route where he tells them about how it was before, they are grateful that is not their reality and steal tim because hes not here now that jason never died

or the fucked up route where ha jason is alive excellent, barry thinks, until he finds out that dick is dead or tim, maybe even bruce

this can lead to either him telling them how it use to be and jason suffering from massive survivors guilt or i guess he never tells them and they are just fucked up in a different way this time

- last theory that i think could be a popular headcanon is dick literally learning magic to bring his brother back

like he has to do some fucked up shit, maybe even use the pits in this a little but he actually manages it

now i dont know how jason would come back because honestly its kind of hard for my brain to think of him coming back not angry, like bro died and his dad didnt make it in time and didnt save him

maybe he comes back not mad but like really depressed and now great dick got his brother back but now he has to help him actually want to stay alive

anyways, thats all these are my fun 3am thoughts

[moonshynecybin]

i need to write more divorce era rosquez porn. just two people attempting to have hate sex but because of marc’s busted arm and vale’s creaky old man knees and their general clownish demeanors they’re really mostly just kind of bad at it

[lambmotifz]

ngl the more i rewatch spn the more i get convinced that sam and dean didn’t fuck pre canon

[comic-sans-chan]

obsessed with julian asking "what did they do to you? is it some kind of punishment device?" in the wire because my god if this man didn’t go from "this is garak my super cool spy pal who i go on secret missions with and sometimes fuck teehee but also yeah his planet’s kinda fucked up and he’s got some weird ideas but we’re working on it" to "this is garak he's my precious little angel babyman who has been horribly traumatized and brainwashed by his government but it's okay because i'm a doctor and i will fuck and suck the fascism out of him if it’s the last thing i do" in just two years. shit's wild

[merakiui]

what if jade was actually more of a perv than Floyd and Azul combined underneath that (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠) façade

This is exactly how I see him!!!! He's such a freak!!!!!! Even more so than Floyd and Azul. In terms of shamelessness, I like to imagine Jade is at the very top spot. He's just so,,,, depraved. The type of man to shamelessly sport an erection while you're lecturing him about how annoying he is or something degrading like that, and he just stands there like (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶) and waits for you to notice LOL. I also just think things like erections in human form aren't something embarrassing for Jade and, by that extension, Floyd because it's something they aren't used to dealing with in mer form and they just don't understand why it's such a big deal if people see because, as Floyd will note, "everyone's got junk, so who cares?" Azul gets flustered over things like that because 1) he's easy to fluster and 2) he wants to actually blend in with human society and not be labeled a pervert right away like a certain pair of eels. ^^;;;

Part of me wants to push the Jade is a feet guy agenda because his dorm groovy is so,,,,, T_T but then I feel like that makes sense for Jade to be the one with the foot/leg fetish??? He's spent all of his life playing the "normal" twin or the "responsible" twin because that's how he was always told apart from Floyd. He's much too calculated to just let loose like Floyd does and he has an image to uphold, so he probably just masks all of his perverted behaviors so well you'll never know. But then he does things like offering to shine your shoes or tie your laces or something silly like that and he's hopelessly hard the entire time. You can't even kick him in his dick because there's a 100% chance he'll just enjoy it. T_T you tell him to go die and he's fanning himself like wooooo teehee :3c it's suddenly so hot in here...

Jade knows exactly what he's doing. He is so down bad for you, too. You could tell him you'll die before you ever go out with him and he just becomes even more invested in playing this long, impossible game of waiting. I like to think he gets creative and humorous with his attempts at flirting. Maybe this makes him look a little pathetic, but is that not part of his charms? That, or it's just another artfully crafted façade meant to hide a much more coy demeanor.

He has a list of things he wants to accomplish with you and within the top five is probably a footjob. You kicked him in his ankles after he showed you the list (complete with a handwritten note asking you if you'd help him study anatomy later), and he had to excuse himself to the bathroom to deal with personal issues. :) your violence is just more fuel for his fantasies.

[oceanwithouthermoon]

people who dislike saiki kusuo i need to pick and prod at ur brain. whats going on in there?