#or 'I need to use the toilet but my roommate is in the bathroom'

[swamp-world]

Ooh genuinely the best and most stressful part of going out of town is trying to make everything line up for this to all happen SO. my checklist of things to always do before you go:

Full disclosure: if possible I tend to take early-morning or late-night trips, so I often don't sleep before flying or travelling (anxiety about being late), so I tend to do all of this the night before travelling. I can't really advise on the best way to fit this into daytime leaving-times but you are clever people.

Stinky things. The obvious ones but it's easy to forget one or two. Clean the bathrooms, empty ALL the garbage and compost and recycling, flush the toilets and scrub them. It is tempting not to scrub your toilets before you go away because you are going away and will not be using them. This is the devil talking. Scrub your toilet. Also wash the sinks themselves. I don't care if you normally do or not, do it before you go away for three weeks. Put fresh garbage bags in. I know you are not going to be using the garbage for three weeks but you-in-three-weeks is going to be pissed at you-right-now when you get home and just want to toss out your garbage and fall asleep. (yes it is a small thing. yes it is worth it.)

Bath/shower. Make sure your shower curtain is spread out! Save yourself the mildew! If you like baths, make sure your tub is clean so that if you want to come home and soak you can! Either way, have things ready to have a shower when you get back.

Laundry: sheets, towels, clothes. This one is the most pain in the ass because it involves timing your laundry for a few days before, if you're like me, but there is nothing better than coming home to fresh sheets on a newly made bed, clean towels laid out, and pyjamas all ready (or a set of clothes that you don't have to think about, if you have to go to work/school/other things as soon as you get back in).

Laundry - sheets. The night before I travel I'll change out my sheets and ideally since I'm up all night wash the dirty sheets and put them away so I don't have to worry about them upon return. If you can't do fully fresh sheets, wash them the day before, and take a few minutes to make sure your bed is made nicely. That way when you get in you can either fall asleep right away, or start unpacking and sort things on your bed without having to strip or remake it.

Laundry - towels. I do my sheets and towels all together, so the same rules apply. Leave a full towel set ready for yourself (and however many other people in the house are travelling). If you have roommates who aren't travelling, this isn't as much a problem, but still make sure you have towels set aside for yourself for when you return, in case your roommate used them all and forgot to do laundry.

Laundry - clothes. I don't like leaving laundry sitting before going away in case it stinks or starts to take up smells, so same as the sheets, I'll do all the dirty laundry before going away, so that hopefully the only dirty laundry I have is what I'm wearing when I leave the house. If I have to, I'll do laundry the day before I travel, and whatever clothes I'll be wearing for that day, I make sure I would want to take them with me, so that I toss them in my bag and clean them while travelling. Same with pyjamas.

Speaking of pyjamas! Make sure you leave a clean set ready. Put them under your pillow or lay them out on your bed. Same goes for clothing--before you leave, it's never a bad idea to lay out some outfits for when you return. If you can, have a nice outfit and a casual outfit, even if you're planning on getting home in the evening and not having to do anything. There's always a chance your flight gets delayed or rescheduled, and this way if the worst-case scenario hits and you need to get home and run out the door to work, you're set and have saved yourself a few minutes of stress; and best case scenario, you can just come home and change out of your gross travel clothes and into comfy clothes.

And about your clean clothes: fold them and put them away. Half of this is all less about having to do the work itself when you return and more about the relief of not having the visual clutter, mess, or reminder of further chores to be done. Coming home to empty laundry baskets just feels good.

Dishes. Self explanatory. Don't leave any. Wash the sink itself. Leave them to dry themselves, no worries. But DO NOT leave the dishwasher full; in my experience unless you clean your dishwasher regularly the dishes in there are just likely to get gross all over again.

Fridge. Go through it a few days before you go. Make sure you're using what can't be frozen. Don't wait until the day before to start sorting and packing things up to freeze. And more things can be frozen than you think! Look it up if you're not sure! Last time I left I was up late prepping a huge block of paneer for freezing because it took prep work, so make sure you're prepared to take a bit of time for that instead of getting blindsided.

Floors. Sweep them, mop if you get a chance. Dust is going to settle while you're gone and you are going to have to sweep when you get back anyways, but better to minimize that so you aren't super grumpy when you take your socks off. Same goes for vacuuming carpets.

The rest is mostly just tidying up clutter and making things look organized. You're doing this for no one but yourself, so don't be too harsh about it, but think about what you-in-three-weeks will want to return to. It doesn't have to be "everything in its right place" but certainly enough that you're not having to clean off counter space or sort through piles, or looking at a pile and sighing because you will have to sort through it.

If you have the ability to plan food for yourself for when you get in, do that. See if you've got something shelf-stable or in the freezer that you can have for breakfast the day after you get in so you aren't panicking about buying groceries immediately. Try to have a prepped meal in the freezer that you can microwave or something of the sort if you don't want to have to buy a meal.

This is about giving yourself some room to decompress after travelling! While it's a break from work or school or whatever, it's often also stressful, and if the travelling aspect itself isn't stressing you out, there's likely a bit of dread about returning to work, or having to cook, or just...daily life. Make it so that when you get home, you're able to relax for a little bit longer. That the chores you have to do are related to unpacking, not cleaning up your messes from three weeks ago.

Don't be afraid to ask people for help with all of this. If you live with roommates and can't wash your sheets before you go, ask if they can wash them for you. If a friend is watering your plants and collecting your mail for you, leave $50 and a grocery list and ask if they can grab some essentials for when you get back. If someone is housesitting for you, make sure they know your expectations for how clean the place should be when you return. Maybe ask if they can sweep a few days before you get back. Get them to take the leftovers out of the freezer so that they're thawed by the time you get in.

I am not very serious about planning for travelling. What I am serious about is planning for returning. That last point is probably the most crucial: if you have friends or family or loved ones who will be able to help when you get back, ask if they can. And do the same for them! When someone is going away for a long time, ask if there's anything you can do to help. If they've got a ride to or from the airport, if you could bring them a meal when they get back. It's nice for if they're returning from a vacation, it's better if they're returning from travelling for more serious reasons, and it means you get to see them to say hello, if only for a few exhausted minutes.

Trust OP when they say that returning to a clean house is better than sex. (And perhaps if you aren't too tired after travelling you can in fact have great sex in your clean house!)

edit lmao i just actually went through the rest of the notes on this post to find someone else saying "DO NOT STAY AWAKE ALL NIGHT THE NIGHT BEFORE TRAVELLING TO GET THIS ALL DONE IN A PANIC, MAKE A CLEANING PLAN OR SCHEDULE FOR THE DAY BEFORE TRAVELLING" and you should probably listen to them, unless you're like me and going to be awake anyways, in which case just make sure you don't start at midnight and need to be ready to leave at 5am.

adding something to my "adult advice that i had to discover for myself either because no one told me or when i saw adults do it as a kid i couldn't possibly understand," featuring such hits as "grill sandwiches with mayo" and "almost no quality matters more than flexibility," and it is:

clean your house before a vacation because returning to an already clean house is waaay better than sex

[notfknapplicable]

Move-in went great! FYI I am never ever moving my self ever again. Movers are worth every single penny and having hired helpers to do the literal heavy lifting was life-saving. I'm still unpacking of course and I gotta figure out where to put my dryer - there's hookups for the washer in the kitchen, but it looks like the dryer will have to go on the back porch :-( cuz there's no vent for it anywhere in the duplex. The back porch is uncovered, too, so I'm gonna have to get one of those sun sails to go out there or something. Ugh so tedious, but it'll be worth it to be able to not hang clothes to dry or use a laundromat.

The new neighborhood is very much in the ghetto but like like the old people's side of the ghetto. Plenty of the people on my street are either retirees or disabled and not working, including my duplex neighbor. The street is quiet for the most part (except for the kid who lives in the house next door - he's clearly a twitch streamer because I can hear him screaming about video games from my porch). One neighbor sells soul food plates and that warms my heart. My best friend in middle school's grandmother sold plates from her house and I loved to visit because there was always something to eat and us kids ate for free. It really triggers my 90's housing projects nostalgia.

Sleep has gone well so far and I can already see the benefits of no longer eating and watching tv where I sleep. I've been able to take my ambien and fall straight to sleep 2 nights in a row now!

I had my first meeting with my advisor for grad school on Monday. I'm taking 2 classes in the fall and I think I've picked the class that I wanna use my scholarship for at the rare books program. It happens next spring (2025) at the NY Public Library and I've never visited that city alone before. Could be cool!

[thinkingstoned]

._.

.....why...did my roommate........ put the salt shaker (from the kitchen) (clean, for food, lives on the stove) not only in the bathroom (dirty, has a litter box in it so Extra dirty) but on the back of the fucking toilet -

[cindyss]

• - I DARE YOU TO RIDE HIS THIGH - •

PAIRING(S): mattheo riddle x fem. reader !

WARNING(S): thigh riding, his pov, smut

SUMMARY: y/n gets dared to ride mattheo’s thigh, and after pausing the game, they manage to get locked in alone in Draco’s room.

A/N: im thinking maybe threesome theo and mattheo for my next write?

——————————————————

You and pansy decided to attend a party hosted by some of your fellow slytherin friends at their house. You got your dress on, got there, and began your night.

You got lost into the night, drinking and dancing and drinking and dancing. You met theo, one of the hosts of the party, and danced with him for a bit before the two of you were called to play a game of truth or dare.

Everyone got in a circle to begin the game. Astoria, Pansy, you, draco, theo, blaise, mattheo-theodore’s roommate, who youve never met before, and many, many more. You’d heard about Mattheo before, the dark lord’s son, but what you didn’t know is how fucking attractive this man is.

The game began and so many secrets were revealed and dares were made. Astoria and Pansy were dared to kiss, blaise shared his mom’s number with everyone, draco admitted to once clogging the toilet in his 2nd year, and much more funny stuff.

Theodore spun the bottle and it landed on mattheo. Theo immediately smirked before speaking “i dare you to sit on a chair, while one of the girls rides your thigh for a minute.” A bunch of “oos”were shared in the room. Mattheo just shook his head in disappointment at his friend’s dare.

“Okay so here’s how we’re gonna pick the girl, we’re gonna spin the bottle again.” Theo spins the bottle and it lands on you. Fuck. You were attracted to this man, but thats not how you were planning to get his attention.

Everyone laughs, ready for the show to begin, and you looked up to see mattheos reaction to which you found him staring at you. He came near you and got close, you could feel his breath on your ear “you don’t have to do this if ur uncomfortable.” he whispered. “ its fine.” You stated before you both got to your spot.

He sat on a chair and they started playing music, you got close to him as he manspread, providing enough space for you. You were wearing a dress with just your panties from the bottom, meaning your already wet clit was gonna rub his thigh.

You place yourself on him, grinding slowly at first. Your hands grab his thighs, fingers digging there to remain balanced. He places his hands on your waist guiding you as little moans and whimpers leave both your mouth and his. Good thing the music was loud enough so that the others wouldnt hear them.

his pov:

Gosh, how did i ever end up in this situation. Ive only met the girl for 30 mins and now shes riding my thigh. That asshole theo knows my weaknesses and he decides to use them against me when i tell him about the attractive girl. She’s so good at it it’s driving me insane.

Her clit is rubbing at my thigh and i can already feel myself harden, god fuck she probably felt that. Im now a whimpering mess, i need more than this. This girl is fucking amazing i need her closer. It takes every muscle in me not to kiss her or even throw my head back but this girl is driving me out of my mind.

your pov:

Your wet clit was rubbing against his bare skin since he’s wearing shorts. The only thing separating your skin was your panties. Suddenly, you feel something poking your stomach, you know what this is and you are aware of this situation.

God, this was the longest minute of your whole entire fucking life. “Times uppp!!” Theo shouts making you jump up.

“Alright everyone, for Christ’s sake we’re taking a break” Blaise spoke as everyone separated from the area. “Woahh, that was fucking hot y/n” Astoria spoke. You smiled at her and glanced Mattheo’s way only to find him already looking at you while his friends tease him about what just happened.

“Yo mattheo, y/n needs to use the bathroom, mind leading her there?” Pansy joked as the boy nodded. Confused and pissed at your friends for this act of embarrassment, you play along and follow the slytherin boy up the stairs. Just then, as you’re both making your way to the bathroom, someone pushes you both into a room and locks you in there. “Have fun in there losers.” Fuck.

As you were confused on what to do, you turned around inspecting the room before you were met with the boy right in front of you. “Heyy, sorry if it was awkward before, i did not want that to be our first impression,” he apologized. A smile tugged at your lips as you said “no worries, i enjoyed that anyway, plus you made a horrible job at covering your boner.”

He smirked playfully as he blushed, then you turned around and before you could walk to the bed, he grabbed your hand, making you turn as he connected your lips. You kissed him back rapping your arms around his neck. He smirked into the kiss as he pinned you to the wall.

His eyes full of lust, his hands working on removing both of your clothes as trails kisses down your collarbone. You help him to remain just in your red set of lingerie. “Fucking hell.” He whispers before carrying you to the bed. You get on top of him kissing him as his hands roam your body. “This is draco’s room, he’s gonna be mad as fuck.” You both chuckle.

He kisses you again and slips his tongue in your mouth, you grind on him moaning quietly. “Gaaa..d” he moans into the kiss, grabbing your hair. You help him out of his pants and boxers laying between his legs. Your lips only inches away from his hard cock, you take him in your hands, preparing him.

He’s now sat down you the bed, you between his thighs. You tease his tip, giving it a kiss with your mouth before wrapping your lips around his cock, taking everything he has to give. He groans at your actions, grabbing you by your hair guiding you. You even make a few gagging noises which makes him throw his head back “haaaa.. fuck yeah. just like that baby… mmh.”

You then bob your head up and down, speeding your movements. “fuckkk.. shit yeah. hell yeahh ..hmm fuck- faster faster.. hmhh” he whimpers. just then, he cums in your mouth making you swallow every bit. He grabs you by the face kissing you “good girl”.

Then, he unclasps your bra, while leaving soft kisses on your neck. Your boobs pop out, “fuck wow.” he speaks before beginning to pleasure you. He begins nipping and sucking on your left tit, his other hand cupping your other breast. He flicks your tit in his hand, pinching it, making you moan and whimper against his touch.

Trailing kisses down your stomach, he grabs your panties pulling them down, adding them to the pile of clothes that has now formed on the floor. “You’re already this wet hmm?” he smirks to which you nod at. He slips two of his fingers in, curling them inside you, he connects your lips, not allowing any loud sounds to be heard. He speeds his movement as you’re now under him, arching your back to feel him closer, he uses his fingertips to trail your hipbone.

“Mattheo…” “yes, sweetheart ?” “I need you inside me please right now.” his lips tug into a smile before he says “whatever you want baby .” then, he removes his fingers, holds your hands and pins them above your head. He lines his hard cock with your entrance, teasing your clit. Then, suddenly, he pushes inside you making you moan loudly.

“FUCKKK” you scream. “Shh, sweetheart, i don’t want anyone to hear your little moans.” He leaves you to adjust to his size before he begins thrusting inside you. He lowers his face to kiss you, slipping his tongue in. He bites your lower lip, licking it before moving down to your neck. Just then, you speak. “mmh gonna cum” you say with your eyes closed from the pleasure.

“Not yet love,” mattheo then lifts you up, pulling out of you. He places you on the bed, sat and not anymore facing him. He then places his legs above yours, before pushing inside you. This was much deeper and better. You throw your hands above your mouth to keep from making noises as he begins rubbing your clit. You scream as you come clean on him. “Good girl” he praises before pulling out of you.

“We have to clean this shit up or draco will kick me out.” You both chuckle as he goes to the bathroom (in dracos room) and turns the bath on. “I cant walk mattheo.” He laughs loud before pulling you off the bed and carrying you to the shower. “I guess this will be our room for tonight, draco will have to deal with it” you both laugh.

[rememberwren]

/•Harmless Fun 6•\

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Further Parts

Everyone comes clean.

About this: some explicit talk about consent and non-consent.

-

Johnny insists that it will be easier for the three of you to talk in the ruined bathroom, which is how you end up in the bathtub. A part of you thinks that Johnny should be the one in the tub (he’s the one limping, after all), but he had taken the broom from your hands and insisted on sweeping up the remains of the ceiling tiles himself. 

“Don’t need two good legs to work a broom, hen. Be reasonable,” he’d said with a roll of his eyes. 

Simon keeps busy at the other end of the bathroom sopping up the standing water that threatens the bedroom carpet. With nothing to do and no one who would accept your help, you had minimal options: sit on the closed lid of the toilet or curl up in the empty tub. 

At least in the tub you could draw the curtain shut and retain a little dignity. 

“The bathroom needs major reconstruction,” Simon says, the close quarters and tiled walls making his voice sound as if it is coming from every direction. Not that you mind, with a voice like his. You take in this news while examining the bottles of soap and shampoo nestled in the nook of the wall, reaching out quietly to take one and pop the cap open. God, it smelled like Simon did after his post-run showers, woodsy and clean. You inhale deeply. “So we’re down to one bathroom for the next few weeks.” 

Your belly swoops with relief: they weren’t kicking you out. You peek out of the shower curtain, soap held out of view, and maybe it is partly that outlandish relief that has you saying: “That’s not so bad.” 

Simon stares, kneeling on the tiles, wet towels all around him. “It’s an invasion of your space and privacy.” 

“Yeah, who knows the sort of girly things you keep hidden in there,” Johnny says. 

Simon shoots him a dry, unamused look. 

“I don’t mind sharing,” you admit (thank God you’d hidden the only real incriminating item before Johnny had used your bathroom). “My last roommate and I had to share while we lived together. We just locked the door and tried to respect each other’s time. I’m sure the three of us can make it work.” 

“We’ll have to,” Simon says, sounding about as thrilled of the prospect as a man might be of the electric chair or other unwilling euthanasia. He turns his dark, all-seeing eyes on you. “What is it that you needed to talk to us about?” 

You pull the curtain shut abruptly. With care, you sneak the soap back into its former position and hope that Simon won’t notice it’s been moved. Your hand shakes while you do. You’re horrified to feel tears of embarrassment and shame filling your eyes, grateful for the cover of the shower curtain as you palm the tears away before they can fall. Even if they weren’t planning to kick you out, it made you feel no less shameful about what you had done on the car ride home.

“I just feel terrible about last night. What I did to you, Johnny—and you, Simon—it, it was trashy to say the least. I mean, it was predatorial—” 

The soft rasp of the broom’s filaments against the floor stops. 

“Preda���? Alright, I’m coming in there.” Johnny draws the curtain back, frowning down at you. You don’t want to imagine the sight you make: curled up in his bathtub, eyes red from rubbing them raw. He turns himself sideways and sits on the ledge, wincing as he does so. Ever attuned to Johnny’s needs, Simon reaches out and helps him adjust his leg into a more neutral position. “What’s all this? Yer no predator.” 

“You tried to stop me.” Your voice is thick, cracking at the edges. 

“I didn’t say no, not in so many words—” 

“You didn’t say yes either, Johnny,” you remind him. “If a man had done to me what I did to you last night, you’d break his teeth in.” 

Johnny’s face twists into a grim expression. “Aye. Maybe you’re right. Maybe it wasn’t right what you did—but I get a say in it too, don’t I? I get to decide what happened to me, and I don’t feel like I was taken advantage of. Jesus, I could have stopped you if I hadn’t wanted it so bad.” 

“I think you’re—” you pause, blinking as Johnny’s words make it through the fog of your own self pity. Your eyes flicker to Simon, unsure if you had heard correctly. Simon gives nothing away, his eyes reminding you of cool dark rooms, if only you could find a lightswitch to illuminate them. “Johnny, did you just say—” 

“Is it easier if I shut the curtain again?” 

“Might be.” 

“Alright.” Simon helps him stand and Johnny tugs the curtain shut again. “Let me preface this by saying that you can say no to the likes of us, fer any reason, explained or otherwise, and there won’t be any consequences! But since the day you moved in, we’ve felt a chemistry with you that we haven’t felt with many people before, and we wanted to know if you felt the same way.” 

Chemistry. That was one way to put it. Overwhelming attraction and unshakeable fondness was another. While you knew that the three of you got along well enough (and more than once Johnny had referred to you all as friends), it loosened some tight, anxious muscle in your chest to know that they felt the connection too. It wasn’t just wishful thinking on your part; there was chemistry.

“What sort of chemistry?” you ask, adjusting yourself into a more comfortable position.

“There’s more than one?” Simon mutters. 

“I mean, there’s chemistry in a friendly way or a more romantic way—” 

“A sexual way,” Johnny suggests. You jolt and accidentally bang your knuckles against the porcelain of the tub. Hissing, you cradle them against your chest, mulling over his words.

Your mouth feels almost too dry to speak. 

“Right. Well—yes, I feel…that.” In the back of your brain, a tiny fire burns, fueled by disappointment. You try to smother its flames before it grows out of control and threatens to burn up your higher reasoning. Not every relationship needed to be centered around romance; this was the twenty-first century. You were perfectly within your rights—some would consider it smart, even—to have physical relationships without the complication of emotional aspects.

You’ll keep working on convincing yourself. In the meantime: “So you’re saying you want to have sex.” 

“I’m open to taking things slow and seeing where they lead,” says Johnny.

Dimly you remember something: some night spent curled up on the couch, your head lighter than air, listening to Johnny and Simon talk beside you. Something about their conversation reminded you of this moment, but the more you tried to remember, the more it slipped through your fingers like sand. 

“All of us?” you ask, noticing Simon’s pointed silence. 

There is shifting on the other side of the curtain. You see shadows moving through the thin plastic and fabric, like the two of them are trying to have a silent conversation with only hand gestures. It does nothing for your nerves. At length, Simon says: “Not me. Just you and Johnny.”

Your heart does a strange dip, like a bird changing course and soaring toward the ground. You feel strangely, stupidly hurt by this, though you couldn’t put into words why, and you wouldn’t want to even if he asked. It was within his rights to say no. Hadn’t you just learned that lesson?

“Are you sure you’d be okay with that?” you ask. Simon had never come off as a jealous sort of type (and you imagine that a jealous type wouldn’t last long with Johnny anyway, not with the way the other man liked to flirt), but everyone had a limit. You weren’t sure that if the situations were reversed you could be so affable. 

“Someone needs to keep a clear head,” he says. “I’ll be the designated driver.” 

Maybe he’s right. If you truly plan to sleep with Johnny, maybe it will be best to have someone in the apartment still as detached as possible. 

“Thanks, I guess,” you say, trying to force a little humor into your voice. “I think I proved last night that I don't make the best decisions under the influence.” 

“You did make the best decision,” he says solemnly. “You called me.” 

Johnny’s hand appears from around the edge of the shower curtain. Grinning, you stretch out to touch his fingers with your own and lace them together. It’s a little awkward, but most new things are. His hand is warm and gentle, and you could get used to it. 

“We’ll take it slow, yes?” 

“Alright.”

“Glad we’re on the same page. Lunch?” 

“Definitely on the same page there.” 

“Get out of my tub then.”

-

“Hey. Stay back.” 

Feeling a little like a student asked to stay behind after class, you watch with envy as Johnny slips into the living room to call for takeout, leaving you alone with Simon. You don’t get to spend a lot of alone time with Simon, and that time is usually spent in companionable silence as he reads. Nerves bubble in your belly, wondering what else he could have to talk to you about that he wouldn’t want to say in front of his husband.

“What’s up?” you ask, aiming for nonchalant. 

“I’ve got a rule,” he says. “One for you.”

“I’m all ears.”

“Don’t fall in love with Soap.” You blink up at him. Of all the things you could have imagined him saying, this hadn’t been on the list—though perhaps it should have been right there at the top. “I know how easy he is to love. But I also know that this is going to end at some point, one way or another. Let's not let it end up a mess. That’s my advice. As the driver.”

“Just friends,” you clarify around the knot in your throat. “Believe it or not, I was thinking the same thing. This is all just for fun, right?”

Simon stares at you hard, like he is trying to see through you to the door behind you. You hope your face is arranged into something neutrally appropriate but know that if it isn’t, it’s already too late. 

“Right,” he says at length.

-

The night ends softly, with something mindless and easy on television. Simon sits on the floor with his back against the base of the couch, head against Johnny’s knees. Johnny lays outstretched across the couch on his side, one hand reaching down to rub at his aching thigh now and again. All while you sit curled up in the armchair, watching the television half as often as you watch the two of them. 

They’re beautiful. There’s something about the way they contrast with each other, the darkness and the light, which you find aesthetically pleasing. Sometimes Johnny slips his fingers into Simon’s hair and scratches softly at his scalp, and you get to watch the relaxed, blissed-out expression creep over Simon’s face at the stimulation. 

The domesticity of it does something to you. Deep in your chest—in between your legs. It’s time for you to call it a night; there’s a toy in your room with your name on it (not literally). Joints creaking from disuse as you stand, both their heads swivel to look up at you, making your heart squeeze fondly. 

“I think I’m tapping out for the night,” you admit. 

Simon wishes you a goodnight. 

Johnny says: “Where’s my goodnight kiss?” 

You feel zapped, suddenly wide awake. “You…want one?” 

Johnny nods. He tries to sit up but can’t find the leverage, face twisting in pain. 

“No,” you tell him, “You stay there, I’ll come to you.” 

Walking around the coffee table, you come to kneel beside Simon at Johnny’s head. Your chest feels tight, blood thrumming with nerves. You can’t help but glance toward Simon who hasn’t changed positions except to angle his body towards you both a fraction more, his eyes dark and shadowed. 

“Alright, hen?” Johnny asks. 

“Yeah,” you murmur. 

He reaches out to cup your cheek, his palm warm, thumb stroking along the length of your cheekbone. Steeling your nerves, you lean down and press your mouth against his. His lips are soft, warm as you give him the simplest, chastest kiss. He keeps you there, searching for more, tilting your head with his hand until the angle serves him best, parting his lips until you can taste the lemon from the tea Simon had shared with you both earlier that night.

His tongue sweeps across your bottom lip and your thighs shake, weak in the knees from holding yourself up. You grip a fistful of the couch cushion beside his head and meet his tongue with your own, a soft little dance, familiar steps but a new partner. He exhales, the breath fanning across your cheek, and something about that makes the ache between your legs so much worse. 

You break away. Your fingers find his hair, soft dark strands that slip through your fingers like silk. You whisper: “Johnny.” 

“Just a little more, please,” Johnny begs, and you can’t say no when you want it so bad.

You meet him open mouthed, shifting on your knees to make yourself more comfortable—and you brush against Simon seated beside you. It has you pulling back, sucking in a breath. You can’t help but look at him with wide, guilty eyes, only to find him watching you with quiet, earnest intensity. His mouth curls at the edges into the ghost of a smile, though why he would be smiling, you couldn’t say. 

Meanwhile, Johnny sighs, brushing his thumb against your lower lip.

“Chemistry,” he says, mouth red and kiss-swollen. 

You silently agree. 

[genderqueerdykes]

disabled trans person needs help fleeing unsafe housing with no heat in winter

hello, my name is johnny or equinox. i am a disabled trans person and i have another update on my situation, i am currently in a worse situation than i was before. i am staying in our gas is not turned on which means we can't cook, have no heater or hot water. the gas person was supposed to come today, but we never heard them knock. they can't come back for another week. our toilet and shower do not work. it is november and has been dipping below freezing temperatures at night and we only own one space heater. i have arthritis and this makes my pain flare up horrifically.

there are other problems as well, but the most pressing issues are the lack of heat and options to cook with and inability to bathe or use the bathroom. i need to save up money so i can find a safer situation, as i am severely disabled and cannot go without being able to cook meals for myself. i struggle with fatigue and chronic pain and can't put that much effort into meals.

I need to save up to find an alternative place to stay at. i am deeply scared and tired of living in unsafe situations. i have been in precarious housing since 2020 and am starting to have severe mental health symptoms from the trauma of repeated homelessness and abuse at the hands of manipulative roommates.

if you're interested in helping me, you can do so here:

pay pal: glittergraphicnightmare @ gmail .com

ko-fi: Equinoxian

cash app: $glitterGraphix

venmo: Equinoxian

Chime: $Equinoxian

thank you for reading and considering helping me, have a great day

[moonstruckme]

i don’t really request so idk if this is where i should be asking but I wanted to know if you could do a Sirius x reader story where Sirius is trying to ask out or “woo” the reader but she is rarely noticed romantically and sort of confused and surprised by sirius genuinely liking her

You nailed it, babe! Thanks for requesting :)

cw: alcohol, mention of vomiting

Sirius Black x fem!reader �� 1k words

The smell of vomit has escaped the bathroom and is seeping out into the hallway. You scrunch your nose and try not to breathe. Or hear. Your friend is purging all the alcohol she’s drank over the last few hours with your other friend holding her hair and murmuring slurred but heartfelt encouragements, and because you’re a sympathetic puker you’ve been put on bathroom guard duty. 

“Sorry,” you croak when another person comes up to you. “This one’s occupied. I think there’s another upstairs, though.” 

“I’d really rather people not use that one,” he says. His voice is silky smooth. “Last time I allowed that, everything in my medicine cabinet had moved around the next morning.” 

You blink. “This is your party.” 

“I’m Sirius.” He gives you a smile and sticks out his hand for you to shake. His palm is cool against yours. There’s something disarmingly intense about his gaze, the way he holds yours the whole time you’re touching. “This party is one-third mine. I live here with my roommates.” 

“Right, I—uh—” You try to reclaim control of your tongue. “I think one of my friends knows one of your—James?” 

Sirius nods thoughtfully. “Seems likely. Is she in there?” He nods to the closed bathroom door. 

You feel embarrassed at the scene now, though you’re not sure why. “Yeah. She’s helping my other friend, who’s, uh…having a rough time.” 

He purses his lips. The movement accentuates his cheekbones, which you can’t help but notice are ridiculously striking already. They certainly don’t need the extra help. “Think either of them will go through my medicine cabinet?”

Your eyebrows bunch. “No. What?” 

But he’s already knocking on the bathroom door, cracking it a tad. He brushes a piece of hair behind his ear as he bends at the waist to poke his head in. It’s a deep, impenetrable black which moves fluidly like dark water. 

“Hi.” His voice softens as he addresses your friend. You imagine the situation probably looks dire. “She alright? It’s—no, it’s fine, babe, it happens. Would you like to use my bathroom? It’s a bit cleaner, more privacy. I mean, if you think you can make the journey?” 

Someone must answer in the affirmative, because then Sirius is ushering them upstairs. You take up the rear, providing vocal but cautiously distant support and trying not to gag when your friend does. 

“Well,” Sirius says, closing the door to his bedroom behind him, “that’s taken care of.” 

“That was really nice of you,” you reply. “Thank you.” 

“Oh, it was mostly selfish.” He grins, leaning over the banister to look down at the party. “See that broad-shouldered, smiley bloke in the middle of the couch, looks like he plays every sport known to man?”

You laugh and acknowledge that you do. 

“That’s James. You can see, I’m sure, how it’d be fairly easy for him to shake me about by my ankles if I let his friend kneel on the dirty floor of our downstairs toilet. Plus, now I get to keep the general public away from my bathroom and you don’t have to look so green and uncomfortable at our party anymore. Everyone wins.” He turns his head to look at you, eyes twinkling. “But mostly me.” 

Fuck, being in this guy’s presence is like being in a dark room with a shining star. You’re blinded by the sheer presence of him. 

“Did I really look green and uncomfortable?” you ask him. 

Sirius smiles like he’s trying to stop himself but not really. “I mean, you were obviously stunning regardless, but yes. You’re much improved now, though.” He nods downstairs. “Let me get you something to drink, doll.” 

You’re concerned you might be actually reeling, but you manage to nod, and Sirius takes your suddenly warm and sweaty hand in his cool one, leading you down to the kitchen. You don’t know what’s happening, how it came to be happening to you of all people, but you’re more than willing to go along with it. 

A girl named Marlene has requisitioned the party’s alcohol. She pours Sirius a gin and tonic, giving him a meaningful look and a smile when he turns to you to ask what you want and you squeak out “The same.” He hasn’t let go of your hand. 

“So on a scale of want-to-leave-right-now to best-night-of-your-life, how good a time are you having?” he asks conversationally as he guides you into a loveseat.

You clear your throat, doing your best to act casual. The most gorgeous man you’ve ever seen is sitting right next to you, holding your hand and talking to you like you’re halfway interesting. This night is ranking pretty highly. “That’s quite the range.” 

“Well, I want to allow for plenty of variance,” Sirius explains. “Earlier, you were standing outside our nastiest toilet and looking like you could be sick, so I might have interpreted that as a two and I’m hoping things have improved since then. What would you say?” 

You smile into your cup, hoping the lighting hides your blush. “Definite improvement.”

“Really?” He grins, sparkling. You try not to swoon. “That’s excellent news.” 

“Is it?” 

“Of course. I want you to have a good time, gorgeous.” 

Your heart does an odd, stuttering thing. You feel suddenly warmer. You wish any of that could be chalked up to the alcohol. If he keeps talking to you like this, you’re worried you’ll actually go into shock. These things don’t happen to you. 

“Why?” you ask, dumbly, before you can stop yourself, because you’re an idiot. 

“I mean,” Sirius swipes his hair behind his ear again, gaze dropping from yours for just a millisecond, “you might stay longer if you’re having a good time. I’ll take you for as long as I can get you.” 

His eyes have found yours again, but they’re different. There’s less bluster behind them. You feel the beginnings of a slow, shy smile spreading across your face. He actually does like you. Somehow, realizing his nervousness lessens yours. Maybe you’re on equal footing here.  

“I’m having a good time,” you tell him. “I want to stay.” 

Sirius mirrors your smile, and his charm is back in full force, but this time you can see through some of the smugness. It feels like he’s let you in on some sort of secret. “Thrilled to hear it, doll. Want to dance with me?” 

You find you really do.

[highvern]

YUCK

Pairing: Kwon Soonyoung x f!reader

Genre: fluff, suggestive moments

warnings: mentions of illness/body fluids (snot, vomit), avoidant attachment from reader, Hoshi best boy

Length: ~2.9k

Note: more of this couples bc im crazy thank u @gyuswhore

series m.list: Houdini [s], Green Light [s, f], Talk [a, s, f], Casual [a, s, f], Mine [s], espresso [f, s]

m.list

This blog is intended for 18+ only! Minors/blank blogs will be blocked.

Two and a half months of hooking up with a guy who may or may not be a furry and things start feeling…comfortable. 

You’ll pretend until the day you die that every time the weekend rolls around you won’t end up naked in Soonyoung’s bed. Or your own. Usually it is your own because he has more roommates than you and yours leaves to stay at her boyfriend’s until Monday night which means there is no need to keep quiet (which you and Soonyoung both struggle with but you refuse to acknowledge that fact). 

It allows for many nights bent over the kitchen counter, Soonyoung’s chest hot against the back of your thighs as he works you up with his mouth. Or occasional nights on the couch after you both are too into each other to make it upstairs to your room, planted firmly in his lap while pinning his hands to the cushions. There's also the nights he drags you straight to bed and demonstrates exactly what all the pictures you took while tucked away in the privacy of a gross bar bathroom did to him. 

You’re pretty sure Soonyoung has picked up on your game by now because instead of asking ‘if’ he’s taken to asking ‘when’ he can come over. And it's annoying that it doesn’t really annoy you at all.

Soonyoung comes over on Friday nights and leaves Saturday afternoon, except when he shows up on Saturday mornings and stays well into Sunday night. Or the occasional weekend where you remember who you are and show up on his door and leave three hours later with cum still drying on your thigh as you walk past his roommates still pregaming in the living room.

Except now it's Friday and you’ve got nothing on your mind except for the inside of a toilet bowl and the cool tile of the bathroom floor.

Call it food poisoning or maybe the flu, but you’ve been in and out of sleep since the early hours of dawn. Shivering on the floor, the only company you have is a pile of dirty clothes. Even the crack of light under the door is too much stimulation for your illness-racked brain to tolerate.

“Y/N?” your roommate calls from the other side of the darkness, out in the hallway where it's safe from whatever curse is making home in your gut. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay home? I don’t mind.”

“I’m fine,” you groan. Your words couldn’t convince the deaf but you try anyway. 

She responds but it slips right past because another bout of nausea takes hold.

You manage to fall asleep at some point, clammy on the floor with aching hips. Maybe an hour or maybe ten minutes. It doesn't really make a difference because you still feel like shit when the door opens and the hall light burns through your retinas.

“Hazel, I said I’m— What are you doing here?” you croak from the floor. 

Soonyoung stairs down at you, face soft with something that might be worry but it’s probably just the fever melting your brain. “You look like shit.” 

“You always know just what to say.” The usual snark isn’t there, replaced by a pathetic helpless whine of discomfort because all you want is to curl up and die. “Did you come to insult me or…?”

“Hazel let me know you were sick and usually sick people need medicine and soup so I brought that and this tea my mom used to give me as a kid.” 

“Are you trying to cure me so you can get your dick wet?” 

“No. If I wanted to stick my dick in a Petri dish I feel like there are easier ways to go about it.” He kneels right next to you like he isn’t the slightest bit concerned about catching the plague brewing in your immune system. A cool hand cups your cheek, thumb gentle at your temple where a dull throb has haunted you all day. You lean into the comforting touch without much thought.  “When was the last time you showered?” 

“I don’t know. Like two days ago?” 

“Yeah, I can smell that. Alright my little germ cell, let’s get you cleaned up.” 

His arms snake under yours, dragging you from the floor even with your muscles limp. It takes more maneuvering but you don’t bother helping. If he wants to play not-so-sexy nurse and patient then that's his problem. The warmth of his sweater is welcome though. 

“Is this some weird fetish thing?” Nose buried in Soonyoung’s chest, it comes out in a jumble. “Because I can’t handle this and the furry stuff.” 

“Yes, caring about your health is a fetish for me. Really gets me off knowing you’ve been a good girl and taken your vitamins.” 

“I knew it.” you whisper. “I’m not calling you daddy if that’s what you want.” 

Soonyoung laughs and the movement sends another bolt of pain through your skull. He tuts over your responding whimper and what may be his lips press to the side of your head briefly. It’s warm and comforting, the beat of his heart lulling you into the first satisfying rest since you woke up. Your hands bunching the front of his shirt are desperate for anything to keep you steady. 

Thankfully, he doesn’t release you while setting things up for a shower; accommodating for your weight with a slow shuffle and more placating coos against your hairline every time you protest a sudden jostle. The chill of the bathroom fully sets in when he pushes down your sweats and shucks off your snot stained sweater before tossing away his own. If you weren’t barely functioning it might even be impressive that he’s kept you in his arms the entire time.

“If you’re trying to fuck me, I hope you don’t mind snot.” You blow your nose against the curve of his neck just to be a bitch. 

You feel more naked under the stream of water than you ever have, which is ironic given you’ve had Soonyoung face to crotch more times than you can count. Something about the non-sexual nature of nudeness, feeling the least sexy you ever have while he scrubs you down with gentle hands, turns your stomach more than before.

“I’m not trying to fuck you,” he laughs again; a thousand volts straight to the heart. “Don’t worry.” 

You pop out of hiding, hurt by the idea. “You don’t want to fuck me?” 

Soonyoung’s face is soft, cheeks round and hair already damp to his forehead. He isn’t disgusted by the puke on your breath or the sweat matting your hair. Or if he is, he hides it well. “I always want to fuck you but right now I’m trying to make sure you don’t die.” 

You dive back into his shoulder, mind numb to anything beyond the silky feel of hands washing away days of ick. You’ve felt his hands on almost every part of your body but right now they lack the characteristic urgency from those moments where you can’t get enough of each other quick enough. He’s touching you the way he does in the glow of the moon after you’ve both been satisfied, when Soonyoung thinks you’re asleep and you let him as every curve and dip and hill of your body is covered in gentle strokes like he’s committing you to memory.

“I can do that on my own,” you argue. 

The facts aren’t stacked in your favor right now but it’s the principle: you don’t need him to take care of you. You can handle it on your own. He’s only here because you let him.

“Oh, I know. Now close your eyes so I don’t get soap in them.”

He cups your face, thumbs rubbing away the sweat that's been caked on since morning. Then it’s a rough washcloth doused in the scent of your face wash but you swat it away in favor of the calluses on his fingers. If you weren’t a dead woman walking he’d never get a chance to be this close. 

How is it more terrifying for someone to wipe away your boogers than let him see you naked multiple times a week? A question knotting your stomach into tight pieces as Soonyoung hums some tune you don’t recognize like he’s more than happy to do so.

Your brain stops working after so long; too exhausted from everything to think more about what this all means. Not even the familiar flat press of his front against yours can incite a response beyond content. All the world shrinks into the pitter patter of the water swirling around the drain, and the parts that are warmed by Soonyoung and the parts that are waiting to be.

When you come back to awareness, the waters off and he is whispering something into your clammy forehead.

“Hmmm?” 

“I said, it’s time to get out.”

More shuffling gets you back into your room where the mattress takes your weight while he digs around for fresh clothes. You roll onto your side, clad in a towel and nothing else, resound to fall asleep then and there.

“Alright, arms up,” he commands. 

You try to pull away, diving back into the pillow soaked from your hair but Soonyoung gets you up at the waist, maneuvering stiff limbs patiently.

“Do you have an armpit fetish too?” you ask with the collar stuck around the top of your head. 

“And you call me a freak?”

Next is pants, and it takes a few tries for you to even consider being helpful. Soonyoung lifts each leg individually, working the fabric as far as he can. Then a few dramatic grunts from coordinating your entire body weight but you’re back in a clean pair of pajamas and tucked under the covers. Soonyoung didn’t rise to any more of your snide remarks about being naked. He simply avoiding your bare skin like it’d burn. Not even his favorite thing about you (boobs) gets any attention, just a few chuckles and more kisses into your temple.

You melt into the plush mattress, hidden beneath a pile of blankets from the cruel world that cursed you with new realizations you're not prepared for just yet. 

Eyes closed the entire time, you hear Soonyoung leave without so much as a goodbye. In theory it’s what you want. Exactly how you prefer; you alone, him somewhere you can pretend all the confounding feelings don’t exist. You didn’t even want him to show up in the first place, but now that he’s been here and you’re horrifically aware how nice it feels to have someone take care of you. You miss him. 

And as soon as the pit opens up, you hear someone shuffling down the hall coming towards your room.

“Alright, once you eat something you can sleep.”

The thought of food tightens your stomach more than the fact he didn’t leave you but he’s right. You need fluids and you’re not strong willed enough to get them yourself.

After the first few bites, you feel a little more human and less like a walking sack of shit. With it, the discomfort of this entire ordeal rears with a new vengeance. 

“Why are you here?” It sounds like an accusation.

He doesn’t even miss a beat. “Because I like you.” 

Soonyoung says it matter of factly, the same way the sky is blue and water is wet, while shoving another bite into your mouth.

You’re too exhausted for a fight right now; not with the only person making a real effort to keep you alive, but the instinct is strong after years of low expectations and plenty of disappointment.

“Why?” 

“Because I just do.” 

Your eyes meet over the spoon. He doesn’t look annoyed or perturbed or even angry. He likes you whether you like it or not. 

“I don’t date.” 

“Okay,” he agrees, wiping at the spill dripping from your chin.

“You aren’t gonna argue?” 

“Nope.” He pops the ‘p’ and your need for confrontation with it. “You don’t wanna date? That’s fine. I’ll take whatever I can get, even if that’s spoon feeding you on your deathbed.” 

You take the next bite before commenting, “You’re so weird.” 

“I like you too. Now open up for the airplane.” He makes the noise and the medicine twists your brain into actually finding it funny. “How are you pretty even when you’re blowing your nose on my shirt?”

“Deal with the devil.”

He passes you a cold cup when you brush away the remainder of the soup. One sip is all it takes.

“How did you know I like the orange Gatorade?”

“I asked Jun to give me June’s number and she gave me Hazel’s number and I asked while I was at the store.”

“You went through all that trouble just to buy me the right Gatorade?” you snort.

“It really wasn’t any trouble.”

It isn’t but it’s more than anyone else has ever done for you. The fresh wave of nausea has nothing to do with your cold.

“I’m tired,” you tell him. 

The mess is cleaned up in silence. You pretend to fall asleep and Soonyoung lets you until he’s shoving more medicine your way. 

You shake your head, failing to refuse because Soonyoung is doing that dumb airplane nose again and when you cough up a laugh he shoves the spoon in your mouth and you’re left with no choice but to swallow.

Then he’s up and you watch through heavy eyes as he gathers his things. You’ll blame it on the drugs loosening the clutch you have on your emotions later.

“Where are you going?” you ask with faux apathy, negated by the fist tangled in the hem of his sweatshirt in case he evaporates away.

“Home. Unless…you want me to stay?” A tug at the sweater is your answer to that horrible thought. “Oh, thank god – I was getting sad.”

You roll over, offering him your back to curl around. The muscles tensed around your spine soften when he does. 

I sleep better when you’re here.

You won’t tell him that but Soonyoung stiffens for a moment and the fear you’ve said the wrong thing creeps in where fatigue hasn’t rooted just yet. But a kiss to your covered shoulder and a hand under your sweater, flat against your stomach so you stay as close as possible calms the thoughts enough you can drift off.

It’s strange. Having the heat of his body at your back without the limpness of a good fuck still coursing through your veins to thaw the parts that hate pillow talk and the stickiness that come with it.

What's even stranger is that you don’t really mind it all. If anything, it’s actually pretty nice.

Taglist: @tomodachiii @cvpidyunho @miniseokminnies @ddaengpotate @arycutie

@gaebestie @primoppang @gyuguys @mine-gyu @doremifasire

@missminhoe @toplinehyunjin @crvs4vldtn @prettygyuuu @sliceofwoozi @writingbarnes

@dokyeomkyeom @christinewithluv @minwonfairy @idkjustlovingbts @wobblewobble822 @futuristicenemychaos

© highvern. copying/reuploading/translating my work anywhere is strictly prohibited.

[strawberryblue-blog]

Can you write a pedri smut brothers bestfriend trope

Between us —Pedri Gonzalez.

summary: Request. Pedri x Ferran Torres' sister.

warnings: YES. smut. (unprotected sex, cursing, explicit sex)

words count: +2.5k

#SEXYNOTE: I hope you like sunshine 💝 Thank you very much for the support 💖. I know I'm not very active these days but I'll be back soon 💌

The alarm sounded repeatedly as the sun streamed through the window, alerting you that it was time to get up. An exhausted sigh escaped your lips as you sat up in your bed and carved your eyes.

You lazily slipped your feet off the bed and slipped on your teddy bear slippers, walking to the door and opening it. As you crossed the hallway you heard a noise from the bathroom and groaned as you noticed it was occupied. Your bladder was about to burst if you didn't empty it right now, you'd probably get an infection later and you couldn't hold on a second longer.

You slammed the door loudly feeling the shower on the other side. Shit, you couldn't take it anymore. You sighed trying to calm your need to pee.

"Pedro!" you yelled in desperation but were ignored. "Hurry up!"

"What!?" he shouted from the other side, not understanding you.

You crossed your legs and when you swore you were going to pee right there, you sighed again and again but with every movement you felt the urge to pee. Why was living with someone else so complicated? You needed to use the bathroom right now! So you opened the door without thinking and walked into the bathroom, concentrating on getting to the toilet. You quickly pulled down your panties and fell onto the toilet relieving your bladder when you were finally able to pee. A gasp escaped your lips when you felt your lower belly empty from the pressure you felt.

"It's not normally how I'd want to make a girl moan but I'll take it" an amused voice interrupted your quiet, startling you.

You looked to your side and remembered that Pedri was showering next to you. You rolled your eyes groaning as you quickly pulled the large t-shirt over you, covering as much of your body as possible. For a second you had forgotten him. Oh my God. Your cheeks flushed a soft red as you came to your senses and remembered he was still there, inside the shower, looking at you!

"Is that my shirt?" he opened the shower door suddenly not caring that he was naked.

"Pedro, what the fuck!" you squealed covering your eyes quickly after seeing him.

The image of his body was explicitly tattooed in your mind when you were surprised by him and you started to feel a heat in your body. This was so embarrassing and uncomfortable. At this point you were hating that you were living under the same roof. You heard a loud laugh from him and then grab the towel hanging on the wall. Since you still had your eyes closed, you could hear it come out of the shower.

"I didn't know it was yours, I took it from the washing machine" you excused yourself still covering your eyes.

"You look cute, little one, but next time make sure I'm not looking behind the glass" he whispered close to your face surprising you again.

When your eyes widened at his words, you saw the half naked body of your roommate pass in front of your eyes shamelessly. Damn.

Who would have thought that living with your brother and his best friend would be so difficult? It had been several months since he had come but you still couldn't get used to his presence. He acted like a child and always made bad jokes that embarrassed you.

How did you think accepting Pedro in the first place was feasible? You and Ferran used to move in together when you came to study and when Pedro needed a place to live in Barcelona, Ferran thought it was a good idea for you to share a roof. You didn't know him like Ferran knew him but you only lived together and you tried to get along as well as possible with him. However, there were days when it was impossible.

You couldn't stop think about Pedro though... damn it. Lately these days you had begun to feel particularly strange with his presence and sometimes it worried you. There were mornings you woke up after dreaming about him, sometimes when you heard his voice you felt curious, other times you stare at him for hours. But you tried to think that it was all because you were beginning to know each other and to live together. It had to be.

When you finished, you brushed your teeth and tried your hair, still embarrassed by the previous situation but totally willing to forget about it for your sake and that of your cohabitation. You quickly left the bathroom, trying to get back to your room as soon as possible but your body bumps into something and pushes you back. A whimper comes out of your mouth as you bolt but an arm grabs you and presses down, breaking your fall.

Your feet find balance as your hands rest on a hard chest and your gaze drifts to the surprised eyes of your roommate. You swallow saliva as you feel the pressure on your lower back and his soft skin under your fingers, you're so close to him you can feel his heat leave his body and reach yours.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you" you apologize nervously.

"I didn't see you" he says looking at you and you shake your head shaking.

Your pulse races and as you bite your tongue nervously, you feel the pressure of his hand holding you.

It was the first time you had him so close to you and you felt a weird sensation, making you rethink all your ideas. What the fuck was going on today? You guys usually barely saw each other, when you woke up in the morning he was already gone and you didn't see each other again until dinner.

A small pout on his lips made you swallow a sigh at his closeness. His wet hair fell at his sides making him look so handsome and you could still smell the scent of his shampoo. Heat rushed through your belly and you almost gasped at how hot he looked, his bare chest, he was only wearing underwear and that made you sweat.

You didn't know if you were still asleep and this was a dream but when your eyes met his lips the urge to kiss him was uncontrollable.

Suddenly you couldn't to move, you were a mess under his hungry gaze as if he wanted to tell you something. You tried to move but he didn't let you, Pedri kept stopping you with his hands and you didn't want him to let you go.

Pedro's hands were around your back and you could feel his fingers pressing harder and harder, your heart was pounding and every second that passed your desire grew more and more.

He was your brother's fucking best friend! It was forbidden. Damn it.

But you couldn't stop thinking about one thing... kissing him.

You could feel your nipples bristle as one of his hands ran down your back, sliding upward. This was dangerous. His fingers crept up the back of your neck, circling it just enough to draw you to him.

And so he did.

The pressure on your neck caused your face to remain on his and his lips to aggressively take you. A sigh of relief left your mouth as your lips met, kissing and feeling each other. Your hands went around his shoulders and you held tight as his hands lifted you off the ground, making you wrap around his waist.

Alarm bells went off in your head as you remembered you were kissing your brother's best friend, his teammate, his buddy.

But you still didn't want to stop. You couldn't.

Your fingers tangled in his damp hair and you tugged at them as he began to take steps toward the bedroom. Gasps escaped your mouths as you touched, kissed, felt each other. It was like quenching a thirst they had been hiding for so long, they were out of control. Your hands caressed their chin and you could feel the fine hair under them, making you hotter.

You couldn't believe you were doing this.

"You can't wear my clothes just like that and pretend it won't have an effect on me, little girl" he murmured between kisses, pulling you away a little to speak.

A small giggle escapes your red lips.

"I didn't know it was yours" you lie innocently again. "I just took it."

It was partly true, you had taken it from the laundry room in a moment of haste without even noticing it was his but then when you realized it was Pedri's "because of its scent" you couldn't take it off and wore it every night to sleep. Maybe that's why you woke up in the mornings dreaming about him.

"It looks too good on you not to be yours" he mutter mockingly and you laugh.

"If you want it back, take it" you say panting and he looks at you lustfully.

His body was on top of yours and he looked so handsome like that, you just wanted to grab him from your face and kiss him until you were tired. When had he ever looked so handsome to you, how could you be feeling butterflies right now in your belly? You had a thousand doubts but you couldn't think now. You needed him.

You bit your lip as his eyes impacted yours, you could see the fire in them. He wanted this as much as you did and they weren't going to last long.

Ferran? You didn't even think him. And you really hoped whoever was upstairs wouldn't punish you for this later because you were about to commit a sin.

His hands settled on your-his- shirt caressing your skin with his fingertips making you bristle completely as you gasped his name in need. Pedri took your lips again, starting to lift it up a little at a time, helping himself with you to finish pulling it off. You could feel the grin on his face as he saw you without a bra, bringing his palms quickly to your breasts. The cool touch of his fingers made you shiver, moaning as you felt his caresses encircle your breasts and gently knead them.

The warmth in your legs was overwhelming and you could feel Pedro's bulge slap against your belly, the two of you needed each other, you were ready and prepared to have each other but he didn't want to rush things.

Your hands wiggled in his black hair, thrumming him as his caresses rose in pitch, squeezing your breast and squeezing it. His lips bit and sucked on yours and you couldn't have been more at ease with his aggressiveness. It didn't take long for your hands to go to his belly and caress his scarred abdomen, making you moan at the hardness of his muscles.

The process was easier than you thought, you were both almost naked, Pedro had taken a shower and hadn't dressed, while you had just woken up and hadn't managed to get dressed either. So you quickly found yourselves completely naked, caressing, kissing, touching each other.

You couldn't stop thinking about how dangerous this was but it was getting more and more exciting, you weren't afraid and you didn't want to stop. Pedro clearly felt the same way.

As his penis positioned itself at your entrance, you both gasped desperately, craving this moment more than ever. Your hands held his shoulders strong as his hands were around your body, holding himself above you.

His eyes searched for your approval when you were both ready and when your hands went up to his neck, he entered you completely. All your thoughts dispersed for a few seconds as you felt his hardness anchor itself in your center, making you cry out in pleasure.

Over seven months living in the same and you had never come across fucking him before, why had you waited so long? Damn it.

It was like a work of art, his tanned skin sweating all over you, his grimaces fractioning in your memory, the sound of his moans like music to your ears. Every stroke inside you was like seeing the stars, you felt satisfied and needy at the same time. You never wanted it to end, you wanted it to stay inside you for the rest of your life. You were going to go crazy.

His strokes begin to be erratic, irregular, his moans get louder and you begin to feel the pressure in your belly. You are in heaven itself, trying to hold on but you know you will explode. Your fingers sink into her back hard, you want to scream. You're fucking out of your mind, you're feeling Pedro in a different way and you were loving it.

Your breaths become exhausted as you try to feel as much as possible. The orgasm hits you in a matter of seconds making you scream and claw at his back, shaking from the feeling of release as you listen to Pedri's curses, climaxing as well.

Pedro falls limp next to you as you sigh trying to assimilate what just happened. You're supposed to be regretting sleeping with your brother's best friend now, yet you don't feel guilty. At least not now.

You turn your body a little to face him, Pedro looks at the ceiling and says nothing. Maybe he is regretting it, it must be important to Pedro his relationship with Ferran. But this doesn't mean anything, you are two adults who can sleep together and then move on with your lives. It was just a one-time thing, it's not a big deal. Ferran doesn't need to know about it, nor does anyone else.

"What's wrong?" you ask him in a whisper. Pedro turns his head and looks at you.

"Nothing" he simply says.

One of your hands rests on his cheek and you caress him.

"It was nothing" you say trying to shake off his guilt. "Ferran won't know, this stays between us."

He grimaces. "He will kill me" he sighs.

"It won't happen again, it was just a one time thing" you say again to believe it.

The boy next to you nods with a small smile.

"Then I should get out of your room" he mutters with a chuckle. You nod.

His body gets up and he reaches for the few clothes he had on when he came in the first place and puts them on, while you watch him still dumbfounded. His muscular back faces you as you watch him get dressed and a shiver runs down your spine at the thought of what you had done.

He gets out of bed and turns again to look at you, you don't know what his next move will be, so you smile at him to reassure him. He shyly approaches you again, lying on top of you with his head. His lips kiss yours deliciously and you receive him by holding his cheeks.

He is saying goodbye to you, to whatever it is you just did, whatever it is you have. The secret that will bind you together forever.

When you part from your kiss, Pedri smiles and you give him a smile in return, letting him go. His body disappears from the room and you sigh trying to erase all your lived memories so you can move on with your life.

This will not be easy.

[amaranthineghost]

ahh!! i think i speak on behalf of a lot of people when i say i need a part two, because that was so amazing and so beautifully written 🫶🏻🫶🏻

| I CAN'T NOT HAVE YOU, I'LL TRAVEL THE SOLAR SYSTEM TO MEND OUR STARS ( lando norris. ) |

ꕥ pairings: lando x reader

ꕥ parts: 1

ꕥ tagging: @gulphulp

ꕥ summary: they hadn't seen each other in months after their breakup, which left them in more misery than they thought. because now they'll do anything to make it work.

ꕥ authors note: I've been planning this in my head while writing the first part to this and i really like how this came out! going to work on christmas imagines and also finish up a request that I've been meaning to write!

ꕥ warnings: smut (at the end if you don't want to read that part), heavy angst (wanted to break some hearts), mentions of alcohol abuse and heavy drinking, mentions of eating struggles. not proofread the end.

IT'D BEEN MONTHS. months since he last abandoned her in their old apartment. since he drove off in his mclaren, punched the rearview mirror because he couldn't take it. to this day, he regretted it with every fiber of his being. he tried to convince himself for days on end, it was for the better. but was it really?

he was struggling. he couldn't sleep properly, staring at the dark ceiling, feeling beside him in the bed for another warm body, breaking his heart more every time he reminded himself that she wasn't here. it was cold.

it was cold despite the blistering summer heat of monaco, windows open to let in the heat. max swore at him every time because despite being rich, he was letting out cool air. but lando couldn't stand the cold. without her, his heart was frigid.

it worsened as the months grew colder and races passed him by. he was peforming fine, for now, but he'd reach his limit soon enough.

he hated when the air got bitterly frozen because this year, he wouldn't have her. he wouldn't have the heat that radiated off her to keep him warm.

he'd waste himself away with alcohol to forget the memory of leaving her. it turned his stomach in knots everytime to think of her watching him leave because they didn't know what to do to fix them. he wish he knew, he should've.

more often than not, he'd spent his nights on bathroom floors of the club, puking his guts out into the toilet, or sitting on the kitchen floor belonging his temporary roommate, max fewtrell. he sat against the tiled floor and wooden cabinets with a half-emptied bottle in his hands, tears on his face.

he'd sit there for hours, wasting away with every sip burning at his throat. he hated alcohol, but it was the only way to cope because he didn't want to remember any moment without her.

when he was nearly passed out on the floor, max would drag him up by his arms, forcing more than a few glasses of water down his throat. he'd grown familiar with his friend's new sulking.

max threw him on the guest room bed he didn't bother to make because he was miserable. he made it everyone's problem then. he'd leave his passed out friend a concoction of medicines to help with the hangover, he'd gotten used to this routine for the past couple of months.

when lando would stumble his way down the stairs, hands wrapped in his curls with a splitting pain through his head and a grimace on his face, all max would comment is "well, aren't you a pitiful sod."

lando rolled his eyes, groaning at the pain as he did so, sitting on a chair at the table across from his best friend, cringing at the resemblance of dinners with his girl—who wasn't even his anymore.

"jesus, mate, maybe you do need an intervention." he'd push his bowl of oatmeal towards lando, watching the expression on his face closely.

"I'm fine."

"clearly not," max scoffed, "mate, it's great havin' you here, but y'need to sober up."

"I will."

"you've said that last month, and the month before that, and the month before that." he shook his head, "I don't even get why you guys broke up."

lando groaned, rubbing his fingertips to his temple and chugging the water before he spoke, "it wasn't working out, 'ts for the best."

"for the best? are you kidding me?" he scoffed his friend's words, he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

to max, breaking up was for the worst. he could tell lando was in misery, and he'd guess she was the same, maybe worse. maybe he didn't know much, but he knew enough to know that they were meant for each other.

"I'm not kidding," he muttered, pushing the oatmeal around the bowl, his spoon clinking against the sides, "besides, we tried to fix it, 'n it didn't work."

he paused, "fix it 'ow?"

lando rolled his eyes, feeling the consequences of his actions through his head, mumbling under his breath, "we went out to eat."

"you're jokin' me?" he leaned forward, a look of disbelief and disappointment on his face, "you went out to eat? how's that goin' to solve anything?"

lando shrugged again, refusing to look max in the eye as he pushed the mush around in his bowl, picking out the bits of fruit throughout.

"you're a real geezer, y'know that?" he sighed deeply, leaning back into the stool as he sat looking at his idiotic friend, "it was a perfectly salvageable relationship, mate, and you just threw it away." he shook his head, his arms crossed against his chest as he leaned his head on one hand.

"you gonn' call me a muppet next?" he aggressively bit into the small strawberry.

"might as well because you're acting like one. now why did you break up with her?"

"she broke up with me." he quietly corrected him, though it didn't seem to shed light on the fact that they didn't try as much as they thought they did.

"then fight for your relationship!" max exclaimed, throwing his hands up in response, "did you ever talk about what was wrong?"

"we didn' have time to," lando admitted, "and we didn't know what to do." he pushed aside the bowl, having barely touched the food residing in it. it's gone cold now, just like him.

"make the time!" he suggested, jabbing his finger into the counter to make a point, "when was the last time you were alone together?"

"when we had dinner together."

max groaned, shoving his face into his hands, rubbing his closed eyes on his palms. lando was starting to give him a headache, "when was the last time you were alone together, no people, no cameras, no fans, just you and her doing something?"

"i 'ont know."

"jesus, man." his voice muffled into his skin as his face remained in his palms because of the idiocracy of his friend.

"well, what do you suggest i do then, max?" lando's tone got seemingly more aggressive and annoyed, the volume of his voice raising slightly.

"actually spend time with her! take her on holiday!" he suggested, matching energies.

"mate, I can't just ask her after months of not speakin'," lando's stool pushed against the floor as he stood up, he was agrivated. he harshly grabbed the bowl with the cold food and shoved it in the sink.

max turned in his seat, "right, so just give up and go back to drinkin' then?"

lando ignored the comment, it infuriated him because max was right. if he didn't find the solution to his problem, he probably would go back to getting blackout drunk. all in hopes that'd help forget his misery

he leaned against the sink with his arms, his head hung between his inner biceps with his eyes closed, taking deep breaths before asking, "how should I ask her then?"

"you truly are a muppet."

"christ, just help m'out here!" lando pleaded because he couldn't take it anymore. he'd been losing himself to however many bottles of alcohol that'd stacked in the bin and the amount of over-the-counter drugs he'd force down his burned throat. all to forget what seemed like an impossible fix, but all he needed was another person. just because they didn't know what to do doesn't mean others wouldn't.

and of course max would help. he just had to give lando a hard time for screwing up so badly because he would've never expected him to show up at his front door midday, stumbling drunk and muttering slurred phrases about her.

his first thought when he saw his disoriented friend was to wonder if something had happened, the obvious answer being, obviously. because lando barely drank. max knew how much he couldn't stand the taste and chasing burn so it wasn't often you'd catch him drunk, much less to this extent.

he knew it had to involve his girlfriend by the here-and-there words he could decipher from the rest, but he couldn't expect to get the full story from the utter nonsense his friend spewed.

it wasn't till morning max discovered the extent of lando's stupidity.

" 'ts your relationship," max sighed, "and you realize she might not be so accepting to see you."

it hurt to think about. he didn't know what was worse, for her to be in such misery like himself or for her to not want him back. his stomach tied itself in knots to even think about, but he was the one who left her in the first place.

"yeah, I know."

he was lost without her. everything seemed so meaningless without her by his side, though she hadn't been for months, even when they were together. but the idea of her presence somewhere in his vicinity was all he needed.

she was like a drug he tried so hard to quit because it seemed to be getting him no where. but he was addicted. all he thought about when he wasn't drunk was her. every single dollar wasted on booze was drank to forget her. the lack of her in his life.

so when he showed up at her doorstep, it was more than just a shock. she'd opened the door, the last thing she expected was to see him, standing with an expression that seemingly matched hers. the smell of booze wafting from his clothes and the bittersweet smell of his cologne she had long forgotten about. smelling it again brought back everything she tried to learn to forget about him.

she wanted to be mad, to push and kick him away, but she'd been waiting for months for him to reappear into her life. for him to come back to her, the anticipation built in her body every time the door bell echoed off the walls, or knocks that pounded against the door.

but instead she slammed the door almost immediately, and he didn't blame her. how could he when he'd been the one to leave. because on the other side of that door, her heart was pounding.

she'd been wanting to see him for so long, so badly wanted him back in her life, but what if they made the same mistakes? she couldn't take losing him a second time because she'd already lost most of herself when he drove away the first time.

because she'd watched her future slip through her fingertips and there wasn't anything she knew that would make her catch it.

she knew she was to blame for breaking them up. it was for the best, she told her guilty conscience, but it didn't change the heart-wrenching want to have him back.

she'd spent months in the cocoon she made of their cold bed, ultimately settling on his side to feel closer to him. but what was the point? he hadn't slept in that bed in months, the sheets that reeked of him faded, and even more so when he left her, for at the time she thought, forever.

"love, please," he pleaded against the door, his forehead against the cold metal, "I screwed up, but please, let me fix this, us."

she hesitated. she knew she was the type to let people who hurt her back into her life so easily, as if nothing happened, but she was the one who forced him out. she knew that.

so when the door creaked open, he pushed himself away from the door as fast as lightning. her doe eyes peaking around, staring at his chest before they found their way to his face. he'd changed. he looked tired, unkept. she'd be lying if she said she looked the same as she did months ago because she honestly looked worse than him.

because being apart brought out their worst qualities in themselves that they'd helped the other through, but it resurfaced.

when he'd gotten a good look at her, he realized she definitely wasn't the same girl she was months ago. he'd notice the dark circles under her eyes, half-lidded and puffy, begging for sleep. the oversized hoodie he left her, though surprisingly clean, was well-worn by her. through the baggy cloth, he could tell her physique was slimmer, he felt nauseous.

she couldn't stand the silence between them even when they lived the last months of their relationship filled with it. they were both hurting and they both knew it, but they'd assume the other would be the one to patch it up. that's where they messed up, they seem to do it a lot.

"so why now are you here?" she'd cut through the silence with a butter knife, sawing back and forth as she stumbled where she stood. she struggled to keep her balance, lack of energy will do that to you.

"I realized how much of an idiot I was," he stepped closer, bringing his hand to hers, pressing her fingers between his. he trailed the pads of his fingertips down her hand and to her wrist. he'd latch on, caressing the soft skin, he'd remember the feeling.

"but I was the one who broke you with you."

he didn't mean it like that, to insinuate that she was the idiot for breaking them up because in no way did he blame her. he put the blame all on him for not fighting for them.

" 'nd I was the one who left."

she stared up at him, her big eyes doing things to him, he shouldn't feel it in a moment like this, but he did. he just wanted her back, to feel her lips on his, her smooth skin under his soft but callused hands.

her lips parted when she'd realize the feeling of warmth against her face, his hand running along her jaw to her chin. though she was already looking up at him, he pushed her head up further, but so softly.

his voice was raspy and deep, pleading, "please, darlin'." she couldn't say no even if the voice inside her head and the feeling in her heart told her to.

"just don't leave again."

he could never, not after the misery he'd been through without her, blackout nights to forget everything that had led up to their break up. he couldn't imagine the anguish he put her through.

and at those words, he couldn't hold back anymore, his lips colliding with hers so desperately, like he needed her to survive. he kind of did. he tasted faintly of alcohol and fruit, she tasted like mint. her lips moved softly against his passionate kiss because he was acting like she was his oxygen, his water, his everything because she was.

his hand tangled in her hair, the sounds of their breaths between their lips, the heavy heat that surrounded the air as they separated.

"let's go somewhere," he'd suggest, his chest rising and falling more noticeably now.

her lips became a swollen pink as she looked up at him, dazed as her eyes flickered between his green eyes, "where?"

he shook his head, smiling. god, she missed that smile. he spoke so softly now, "anywhere, you pick. it'll jus' be us."

money didn't matter to him. if she wanted to travel to the moon and back, he'd make it happen because he wanted to make things right. he wanted to show her he was all in now because he would never take another step out ever again.

so they'd travel across the world. he'd rent out hotels, restaurants, amusement parks, anything she'd want. like max said, he wanted this between the two of them. no cameras, no fans, no public. just them enjoying their time together and alone at the most beautiful places she could think of.

she'd end up on an island with him, the only other people being the employees of the resorts he'd rent out. he did everything with her.

they went on yachts around the crystal waters and coral reefs surrounding the beaches that they'd later lay and tan on. they'd talk as they bathed in the sunlight. snorkeling while holding hands and pointing out various species that inhabited the waters.

candle-lit dinners sitting across from each other, though their hands never left each other. they'd been offered fancy wines, lando ultimately opting out. she understood. they tried the exotic foods and other virgin drinks the resort had to offer.

they had long runs along the beach, heavy makeout sessions on stranded towels where they couldn't take their hands off the other, deciding to take the trip back to their hut over the waters.

when they'd make it back, he wasted no time because he missed her, the feeling of her around him, the taste of her.

as soon as the hut door slammed shut, his veined hand would be pressured on her neck, pushing at the skin under his fingertips to pull her into his lips. he was desperate, she knew that.

his lips were harshly against hers, she could feel the vibrations of his groans against her flesh, feeling his working hands across her chest, having left her neck temporarily to undo her tied bikini top. it was discarded onto the wooden floors with no further regard. they'd separate, foreheads pushed together and their noses clashing as their breaths mixed in the middle.

his head dipped below her jaw, biting at the skin of her neck. whimpers left her lips and she felt his smirk on her skin while she grasped at his curls. he slowly pushed their bodies towards the open laid bed behind her, her calf's meeting the mattress. he tugged at the elastic of her beach shorts, though deciding to take his time, which made it all the more agonizing for her, she needed him.

his lips trailed her body, leaving trails of his saliva and marks where he nipped at her skin, from her neck down to her chest. he groped her tits, earning a low groan from her as his tongue swirled her areola. she tugged his hair, his curls between each of her fingers as she bit back the sounds that forced through her throat. he was starved of her, which only turned her on more. she felt the heat between her thighs.

he'd kneel on his knees in front of her as he'd continue to leave a string of dark hickeys down her skin as he'd continue to her stomach, and just above her panty line, pulling the elastic of her shorts down. she'd almost just rip them off because she couldn't take how slow he'd move compared to when they first ended up in this situation.

his finger wrapped around the band, slowly pulling the material over the curves of her body, but he'd left her panties, which infuriated her. he did it all while looking straight up into her eyes, the glint in his eyes filled of lust and mischief. he'd lift her leg with his hand wrapped around the back of her knee, helping her kick off the clothing.

he'd kiss the skin just above the side of her knee, his lips glued to her skin as they traveled higher up her thighs, as well as his hands, sliding under the side of her panties. his nose brushed against the cloth of her cunt, ghostly stimulating her clit. it provoked a reaction out of her as she whined, and he'd continue to kiss along the line of her undergarment.

he may have started off desperate, but now he was taking his sweet time to take care of her. she wanted to badly for him to just hurry it along, wanting to feel him, but he'd rather enjoy the moment he had with her, like it was his last.

he pushed aside the cloth barrier, licking his lips as he eyed the wet patch caused by him, his warm breath panned across her cunt and she pleaded, "lan, please." god, he loved to hear her beg, it was music to his ears, but her moans were a symphony.

his two fingers slowly parted her folds, feeling her pulse under him as she moaned against the contact, he 'tsk'd at her reaction, "so wet for me, darling." his voice was raspy, deep and she cursed under her breath as she watched him lick her off his fingers.

the taste of her brought him back, he'd savor it because he hadn't before, not when he didn't realize it could've been the last. she was sweet, her skin smelling of vanilla as his nose brushed against her.

he'd had enough teasing for now, and gently he'd pull down her panties. she'd be fully exposed, but he was still dressed, his clothes feeling tighter around his body, specifically his swim shorts.

he didn't care. he'd thrown one of her legs over his shoulder as he flattened his tongue across her, feeling the tremble in her standing leg. he'd bury his lips in her cunt, vigorously tasting her like he hadnt eaten in weeks. his tongue lapped at her heat and she let out strings of curses interrupted by moans as she'd tug him closer to her by his hair.

vibrations of his groans stimulated her clit as he softly nipped at the sensitive flesh. he'd lapped at her cunt for not long before it became overwhelming, her moans growing high and squeaked as her legs nearly buckled.

he kept going, looking up at her with massively dilated eyes, half-lidded and seductive. her jaw went slack as she stared into his eyes, she felt the crescendo of her high and she'd nearly scream out his name as she came on his tongue. he'd lick up any remaining juice of hers.

his tongue left one long trail over her cunt, pressuring on her sensitive before pulling away, a trail of saliva connecting to his mouth and her slick glistened on his lips and chins. she panted heavily, he watched the rise and fall of her chest, felt the shaking of her knees as they nearly gave out under her.

he'd smile up at her, his goofy grin greeted her after her hazed high calmed. she'd roll her eyes at his light-heartedness after she'd just came on his tongue.

but it was moments like those that'd bring back the spark of youth and naivety to their relationship. because it was what they'd needed all along. all they needed was each other.

[aph-centric-fixs]

hello!!! i just found your blog and i desperately need more gene x reader fics ‼️ if you pretty please wouldn't mind writing a short n sweet (or it can be as long as you want i won't mind lmao) fic abt just the softness of dating gene? i'm not sure how else to describe it but i just want like some domestic bliss with him because he always seems so stressed/upset yk? anyways enough yapping out of me, i hope you're having a good day and no pressure to write this at all!! tysm!!

The weirdly domestic life

Oh my goodness yes! Gene definitely needs that domestic bliss in his life.

Gene x Reader (Gender neutral)

CW// nothing I believe? Other than the writing 🫶

In all honesty, Gene never saw himself living a life with someone else: like probably a roommate, but never a romantic partner. Not that he was complaining, really, he was grateful to have you in his life.

It all sort of came crashing down on him one night, after a long shift. The walk home was cold, extremely so, because of course today of all days he had to grab a jacket without a hood the night it rains. Then his keys kept slipping away from the keyhole, he swore the key was going to snap in half from how aggressive he was trying to get it in.

Practically slamming the apartment door shut behind him, he let out a sigh and kicked off his shoes. Leaning on the door his head leaned back and he just tried to calm down.

"Gene?" He heard. His head fell back down to look at you, a small smile gracing his face at the sight. Your pajamas were adorable, as always.

"Hey sweetheart" he muttered, walking towards you and wrapping his arms around your torso. His head burying itself into your shoulder.

Your arms wrapped around his neck and pet at the top of his neck to play with his hair. "Everything okay?" You asked, using your other hand to pat his back a little.

"Just peachy" he responded, holding you even closer to himself while taking a long and deep breath. It was comfortable in your arms, so safe.

The two of you stood like that for awhile, in the entrance of your apartment just holding each other. To Gene, it was like the whole world had stopped the second you wrapped your arms around him, like nothing bad could ever happen to him with such a caring person by his side.

But, all good things must come to an end, as you slowly pulled away and took his hands in yours. "Let's get you cleaned up, yeah?" You smiled at him, and as he nodded to agree you began to walk to the bathroom.

You sat him gently in the toilet seat and opened a cabinet to grab a towel. Unfolding it you gently laid it on his head, leaving his face clear, and gently dried his hair off slowly. It felt good, like a massage, to Gene. Just what he needed after a long day.

"you go change, I'll finish up dinner, okay?" You smile and lean down to kiss him. He leans forward as you pull away and leave.

It didn't take long for him to change into comfortable clothes, pajamas are real easy to get into. Simple plaid loose pants and a shirt were what he usually wore, but he changed it up a little and went with a hoodie instead. It felt good to have after a long day.

Walking into the kitchen he was you plating everything, holding two bowls next to the pot of what he assumed was a stew of sorts- at least it smelled like it.

"Stew?" He asked, watching you jump with a chuckle, he didn't mean to scare you but it was absolutely hilarious.

"Oh, yeah. I couldn't think of anything else to make today, guess it worked out" You answered. You turned around and handed him a bowl. He could easily see all the veggies and what he thought was beef in the bowl swirling around deliciously.

"C'mon, you can pick the show tonight" you said while walking past him, tugging on his hoodie a little as you did to lead him over to the couch.

"How gracious of you" with a giggle from you as a reply, he sat down next to you. As he scrolled through movies you leaned on his arm, and in return he leaned his head on yours slightly.

Gene never saw himself having a life like this. But damn it if he wasn't grateful to have it, to have you.

[lostintransist]

Fallen Angel | Hugs That Heal

Today had been shit. There was no other way to say it. You got yelled at by no less than three customers for issues that weren’t actually issues, your childhood dog had died, and your friends had to cancel on coming by the shop before close. And your fucking period started today meaning that even though you kept it together all you wanted to do was weep.

You had only been living with Simon for a few months. He wasn't home much and often on a near unpredictable basis. Hoping against hope that he wouldn't be home today you slid your key home. When the door opened, the key still in the lock, you knew hope would not save you.

He still wore his mask and had hard eyes. Fuck. This was Ghost, the mismatched name for a man who wears a skull mask to keep his identity hidden.

Staring at you he didn't move.

"Move or I will find out if you are afraid of tears." They are already brimming at your lash line.

Ghost stepped back. You still had to wedge yourself between the wall and his stiff body. The contact with a body that held no softeness for you was too much. Tears slid down your cheeks as you toed off your shoes and moved on socked feet to the bathroom. Done there, toilet used and teeth cleaned, you moved to your room. Changing turned out to be difficult as your tears worsened and the shaking started.

Barely holding it together you find the kitchen by memory alone. The large shape you can see when your vision isn't filled with tears confirms your roommate is still awake.

"Ghost?"

No reply. Your crying turns to sobbing.

"Can I have a hug?"

Eight sobbing breaths pass before the air shifts in front of you. Reaching out blind you bury yourself into his chest, unleashing the full force of everything that had been bottled up today. His arms drift around you, holding more onto himself than you. That's fine. You don't need much tonight, only to know you are not alone.

Chest hollow you step back, sleeves scraping at both eyes.

"Sorry about that Ghost." Glancing up you see the presence of a soul again. Simon must be back. "Simon. I apologize about that. I am going to go be mortified in my bed now. G'night."

Turning on your heel you march to your bed, hurling yourself between the sheets as self flaggliation becomes your favorite refraine.

Fallen Angel Masterlist | Masterlist

[brain-n-body-in-disarray]

What the h*ll is "basic hygiene" anyway?

If you're like me, you've been struggling with hygiene for a long time. I'm neurodivergent, I have chronic fatigue and chronic pain, so yeah, it's been hard, my whole life.

Here's a few tips that helped me or some of my friends.

1. Redefine "basic hygiene"

No, really. Redefine it. Neurotypical and able-bodied people will tell you all can of things about what is "basic" hygiene.

The rule is: do what you can. That's it. The rest of the post will be tips to increase what you can do. But in the meantime, just do your best. You're fantastic the way you are.

2. Time

There's two thing here.

The first is: find the right time for you. It's not always easy, because we often have obligations, and we're supposed to be clean at those right moments. It's not easy. Sometimes it "helps" because it gives us that "boost" we needed to start getting clean, but most of the time it's just stressful. So instead find the moment that works best for you. I know there's moments in the day when it'll be easier for me to start tasks that I would struggle with at an other time, but I prioritise other things instead for a reason or another. Try washing yourself then, even if people will tell you it's strange to have a shower at three pm. Who cares.

The second is: divide to conquer. You don't have to wash ALL the parts of your body at once. You don't necessarily have the energy for it and it's okay. Also it can feel daunting to face that long list of steps. A body has a LOT of parts to wash and clean. Really, that's scary and exhausting. So the solution might be to do smaller things here and there. Do what you can when you can, that's okay. At least you've done something, that's great!

You are also allowed to take breaks in the middle. It can help if you are tired, or if it makes you anxious.

3. Wipes.

I personally hate washing with soap and water, whether it's a bath, shower or just at the sink. It takes time, it's a lot of steps, and it feels horrible. I do it when I can, but I don't enjoy it. The partial solution is wipes.

Baby wipes are great, they're soft, some smell good but faint, some has no odor. You can clean yourself quickly without rinsing. And they don't let that terrible feeling on your skin.

There's wipes made for your private parts. Which is an important part to clean. Also wet toilet paper is good. (For private parts wipes, buy the organic ones, you don't want anything too harsh there)

Make-up removal wipes are not just to remove make-up. They do clean you face.

Don't use antibacterial wipes though. At least not regularly. They are too harsh for your skin, you'll just damage it. Also too much antibacterial stuffs just make bacterias more resistant.

Bonus point: wipes can easily be carried in a bag. Handy.

4. Charts and lists and apps.

Whether you forget to do it or it you have done it already, or you can't get motivated, or you can't manage to start washing, or there's so many steps you get overwhelmed, or you start but can't remember what to do next, etc., those tips might help.

There's apps like Habitica (it's the most well known but there's others) that help you building habits and remembering to do stuffs and making it fun (help with rewards). It's about general tasks but can be applied to washing. A friend also told me there's a pokemon app to brush your teeth but I haven't tried it.

If you get overwhelmed by the steps and get lost in the middle, making a list of those steps, laminating and putting it in the bathroom near the sink or in the shower can help you keeping tracks. You can even put a dry erase marker near the list to check what have already be done.

5. The "bath buddy"

If you live with someone, you can ask their help.

I'm not saying they have to wash you. Or maybe I am? A friend takes his showers with his boyfriend to help getting motivated.

It can just be your platonic roommate behind the door talking to you, telling you funny stories.

Having company can help start the task and make it more enjoyable which help in itself but also make it less daunting the next times. Having a bath buddy also helps if you get lost in the middle of a task, they can tell you what the next step is. They can also keep you on tracks and in the present (I know I tend to dissociate a lot in the bathroom). And they keep your mind off the bad stuffs (body dysphoria for example, or sensory discomfort)

6. You're never too old for "kids' stuffs"

Because you're never to old for fun stuffs.

No, really, there's no reason why you should deprive yourself of something that would make washing more fun.

Wash your teeth with bubblegum flavored toothpaste.

Play with bathtoys. Buy those little plastic boats and those little squirting animals. (Seriously, the fact that the only fun thing for bath for adult is bubbles is a crime)

The word here is "fun". Make the bathroom fun. Buy a shower curtain with cute elephants playing with water. Put adhesive ducks on the tiles. Make that darn room a place you want to be in, not just to distract you from the bad stuff but to enjoy your life.

7. Teeth. Oh no, the teeth.

First thing: as I said, you don't have to use that "adult toothpaste". The menthol contained in it can be sensory hell. You can use kid toothpaste, it cleans just as well. If you can't use any toothpaste try brushing without it with just water. You can also try toothpaste tablets (you chew on them and then brush). You can try mouthwash. You can try oil-pulling. The point here is to remove some bacteria from your mouth.

About brushing. There's different hardness in toothbrushes. If you're using hard, try medium. If you're using medium, try soft. If you're using soft, try baby toothbrush. If no toothbrush works for you, try a wet cloth, or your finger. Try using toothpicks to remove the remains of food and then use mouthwash.

If the storebought mouthwash doesn't do with you, make it yourself. There's recipes online with essential oils (optional, but maybe there's one you might like), baking soda and water. (I don't recommend using lemon juice, it might damage your enamel.)

My friend just told me I should mention dental floss. I personally hate it, but it might be useful to some of you. It's probably more effective than toothpicks. They also comes mounted on these little plastic sticks if you struggle with the thread alone.

8. Chair

No, really, you have the right to sit down during washing. Buy a shower chair. Put a bench on your bathtub instead of struggling to stand up. Put a chair in front of the sink to sit when you brush your teeth.

You don't have to be physically disabled to use a chair to wash. And if you're disabled there's still no shame. Standing up can be boring, it can be painful, it can be tiring. So sit. You are allowed.

And if you prefer standing, do. You can pace. You can dance. You can do gymnastics. (Just be careful if you're brushing your teeth, okay. Or if you're in the shower. Don't hurt yourself.)

9. Music

If you don't have a buddy to talk to you, music or even podcasts, anything to listen to, can be a nice way to help. They makes the experience more enjoyable. They keeps your head away from the bad sensory experience or the awareness of your own body.

I also find using the same playlist useful to keep track of the time I've been spending in the shower. I even time the steps on the tracklist, I know I washed that part of my body for long enough if that song is over, I need to do the next step.

Also, for me me music is part of the ritual. It helps me to get in the right mind, it motivates me, it makes the routine.

10. Multi-purpose products.

I've seen all those beauty posts about "layering". It's nice if you have the energy and the time, but no, it's not for me.

I hate moisturising creams. I really do. They smells funny, they feels gross and sticky, and it takes forever to apply. It's an unnecessary step for me. But I have dry skin (at least on my body). The easy solution is to use surgras soap or surgras shower gel. (Not just the "moisturising" soap, that won't hydrate as well.)

I don't just remove the unpleasant experience of moisturiser, I remove a step. I save energy.

Also, multi-purpose products help with organisation, there's less things to think about. There's less risk of taking the wrong bottle because you're too headfogged. Less chance of chaos in the bathroom.

I personally can't do that for everything. I'd like to have one soap for everything, but my body skin and my face skin and my private parts and my hair all need different stuffs. But I do try to keep things to a minimum, because the number of products can be quickly overwhelming. So try to balance your sensory needs with your organisation problem.

(Also, if like me you hate the feeling of moisturiser, aloe vera gel is great. It is a bit sticky, but in a different way than cream. I personally prefer that one. There's also the option of oil, there's different kinds for different skin types, even for oily skin.)

11. Japaneses know best: the bidet.

This one might sounds strange for some folx. Where I live, bidets used to be extremely common but they are disappearing. We used to have a bidet next to the toilets in our homes. Japanese toilets have a built-in bidet but they are expensive. There is a cheaper (but still not cheap) alternative. You can buy a bidet toilet seat attachment to put on your own toilets.

Why am I telling you about bidet? Because when you struggle to wash regularly, bidets are incredibly useful.

Toilet paper is highly unhygienic. Wet toilet paper is a bit better. Bidets, that spray a jet of water on your privates, clean so much better.

And they are easy and quick to use. You just press a button and you are clean.

If you have a vagina, it's even more important, because it lowers significantly the risks of getting UTI and the likes.

If you can afford it, I recommend it.

12. The hat, or "well, f*ck it"

You can fail to wash in time for whatever obligation you have. That's okay.

Just use the card "camouflage".

Greasy hair? If they are long, brush them and tie them tightly, and put on a fashionable hat. Or you favorite, silly, hat. Or just a random hat that your aunt gave you (you know the one, you wondered for three weeks if you smiled enough when you received the gift because you didn't want to offend her). Scarfs are nice too.

Other idea to hide greasy hair? A wig. They are higher maintenance, but they are good to have for occasions where you have to look a bit better or if you can't wear a hat for whatever reason.

About odors... Well you know the trick of deodorants and perfume. Not what I recommend, at least not alone. For once not everyone can stand their smell. Also, they aren't that great to succeed at masking odors. If you can, use wipes to clean your armpits (also the underbreasts if you have them) and the neck and chest area. It might not remove all the odors but it'll help and with some deodorant if you can stand it, you should be good.

About deodorant: you can use a dollop of moisturiser (yes, I know I said I hate them, but listen), it will help to stop the formation of odors but the fragrance is usually mild or absent. It's also less harsh than the usual deodorant. You only need a small amount for it to work. You just need to clean before (wipes should be enough)

13. Don't stew in your dirty clothes.

Try to change your clothes often even if you don't wash. Especially your underwears.

I know it might sound counterintuitive to wear clean clothes when your skin is dirty, but staying in old clothes is like wearing a petri dish. By keeping the same clothes on you, you also keep the bacterias that live on it and your body.

It's especially bad in some areas, like your private parts, your feet and your armpits.

If you live alone, or if you live with someone who don't care, don't put clothes on at all. You'll just stew in your bacterial crock pot otherwise.

Staying naked also has the upside of reducing the amount of laundry you have to do.

14. Use your strengths.

Sometimes it's as simple as using your other hand because your dominant one is achy.

Sometimes it's listening to a podcast about your special interest.

You're an artist? Put a whiteboard in the shower. Or, I don't know, draw your body, laminate the drawing, and color the parts you have already washed with a dry erase marker.

Your thing is to make lists of animals of Paraguay? Recite them alphabetically and make a song with them while you brush your teeth and wash your face and clip you nails.

Dancers here? Each movement you make is part of a choreography.

15. Aftercare.

Hygiene is immensely stressful and energy consuming. You don't just deserve a reward, you need aftercare.

It's okay to take a nap. It's okay to need to engage with your special interest. It's okay to need a hug. It's okay to want to be alone. It's okay to feel bad too. Have a cry. Be moody. Don't be ashamed of what you feel. Of course it's better if you manage to avoid these emotions. But it's okay if you have them.

And give yourself a little treat. Have a cup of your favorite tea. Put a shiny sticker in your "things I've done good today" diary. Cuddle with your pet. Read the Swedish dictionary.

Drink a glass of water and eat something.

Also, if you have chronic pain, like I do, take your meds. (My joints are always a bit achy after standing too long, or my shoulder are stiff after washing my hair)

Write an essay about why keeping up with your hygiene is a pain.

Do what you want and do what you need.

16. Shame has no place in the bathroom.

If you've read my previous post, you know what I mean.

I've said it in this post, it's okay to struggle, to not be perfect, or as perfect as neurotypicals and able-bodied people say we should be. Their criterias are bullcrap.

Shame won't help you to keep up to these unachievable standards. They'll just undermine you.

Also, it's okay if some of what I've said here seems unachievable also. I shared what helps me and some of my friends, but your needs might be different and that's totally okay. Maybe someone will make a post with tips that'll help more? I hope so.

Anyway, you do what you can and you congratulate yourself for it. Every step is an achievement worth of praise.

[skelswritingcorner]

POV: You got kidnapped by Decepticons, and you're also on your period

(If you're wondering if you saw this before, you probably did! Tumblr's just being wonky and didn't show it, so I'm reuploading it)

Cast (of the TF characters): Skywarp, Thundercracker, Shockwave, Megatron, Soundwave, Rumble, Frenzy, Jazz, Prowl, Optimus Prime, Ratchet, Wheeljack, Blaster, and a bit of Lazerbeak at the end

Synopsis: You’re on your period, and took a pretty strong painkiller before you went to class so you could focus without curling into fetal position from the pain. However, you didn’t think that you’d be kidnapped by alien robots. Luckily, you were using a cup. However, the painkiller is starting to wear off while you’re captive, and you’re hoping that you can be saved fast. Ideally, without these alien robots seeing you cough up endometrium.

A/N: I made the heights based more on G1 Transformers. I like the big bois, and g/t (mostly because I’m barely 5'2 but that’s irrelevant), but Rumble does not deserve to be 21 feet tall. He and Frenzy should be tiny menaces. Also, I think the size difference between the reader character and Blaster is more than enough. Also, this isn’t really for any specific Transformers continuity or series, more of my own headcanons if anything. Also, if you want to ask about the reader character, use the name Lorelei. Also, my endometriosis is not in my lungs, I just thought "Hey, do you know what would really fuckin suck?" and gave poor Lorelei endometrium in the lungs.

Word Count: 4.8K

Warnings: Menstruation, Endometriosis, Anatomical words for reproductive organs, Kidnapping, Vulgar Language, mentions of medical neglect.

You woke up dreading the day. According to the tracker, your period starts today, which is bad because the cramps get severe enough that you’d be bedridden if you didn’t have your painkillers, and also because you had class today. College life and all. At least today was Saturday, so it was only one three-hour class.

Going to the bathroom first, you checked your underwear for any signs of blood. There was only a bit of blood, but if you didn’t act quickly the bloodfall would begin. You grabbed one of your menstrual cups, folding it then pushing it in through your vulva. When it was in place, you used some toilet paper to wipe some of the discharge and blood off your fingers, flushed, then washed your hands.

You felt a cough coming up. Grabbing a tissue, you coughed into it. There was a bit of what looked like blood from where you coughed. If this was your first time, you would’ve panicked. However, you knew it was the stupid endometrium in your lungs because of your stupid endometriosis. Better pack some extra tissues, maybe buy some from the convenience store on your way to class.

Going into the shared space, you noticed a bag with a note. Must’ve been one of your roommates. The note had your name on it, so you decided to read it.

Y/N, I got you a snack. You mentioned in the group chat that your period starts today. I don’t know if you’re supposed to eat something with your painkillers, so I got you one of your favorite snacks just in case. Toodles! - Emily

It was chocolate covered pretzels. You took the bag, grabbed a beverage from the fridge and went back to your room to grab your medication before eating. It’s best to take it now, so your cramps don’t get so severe that you end up curled up in fetal position sobbing from pain once it fully starts.

After eating in the common room, you went back to change into your clothes. Fortunately, you didn’t share a room with anyone, so you could change in your room. You picked out an oversized black band tee and blood red sweatpants after putting on a tank top. If you weren’t on your period you would’ve picked something that looked a little cuter or fashionable, you don’t want to ruin those clothes if you need to cough up blood. You don’t know if hydrogen peroxide works that well with the materials.

Besides, most people that know you can easily predict whether or not you woke up feeling good based on how styled you look. If you’re wearing something more styled, with multiple layers and accessories, you’re likely in a more positive mood. If you’re not, either you’re on your period or doing something that requires some dirty work.

You packed your messenger bag with the things you needed: stationary, wallet, charger with power bank, tissues, a plastic zipper bag in case you can’t throw any bloodied tissues at the current moment, a small hammer, the tools that tech people carry, extra menstrual cup in a 3D-printed cube container that requires the opening to be twisted to get to it, a spray bottle of hydrogen peroxide, the usual things.

Luckily for you, all you had was a single class that only lasted two hours today. No rehearsals for the color guard, since the field is still wet from yesterday’s downpour. Maybe you’ll do some sketches after class.

Putting your shoes on, you left your dorm room and walked to your class. You made sure that your dormitory was close to the main campus, given your medical problems. Unlike yesterday, it was a gentle sprinkle of water, so you didn’t rush yourself. Class was in half an hour anyway.

Walking into the lecture hall, there was only one other person. You sat at a seat closest to the door, and turned to the other student. Like clockwork, you both got out your phones, pointed a finger at each other, and took a picture. Neither of you know each other's names, yet the bond is indescribable. Bonding through mutual goofiness without a single word exchanged. After that, a few more classmates came in, and once the clock hit noon the lecture began.

♢♢♢

After class ended, you packed up your things. Before you could get up, someone tapped on your shoulder.

Turning around, you saw one of your classmates with a furrowed brow. “Do you know about the recent sightings of alien robots?”

You shook your head, “I haven’t checked the news.”

“You haven’t heard anything?! They were spotted really close to campus two days ago. It looked like a bird, but obviously no birds nearby are that large! Be careful out there, hopefully nobody gets abducted.” She waved goodbye and sped out the room.

The alien robots are something you’ve heard about only in passing. Your roommates have mentioned them before, one of them took a picture that was so bad in quality you thought it was fake. Why are they going near a college, out of all places? There’s no local government facilities or anything that you think would interest them. Except for the telescope the astronomy majors use. They might be curious about that. It’s not related to your major though, so hopefully they won’t try taking you.

Walking out of the building, you decided to walk around a bit. It was nice, the sun wasn’t too harsh, the drizzle stopped, and there were basically no people around. Your painkiller should last a few more hours, so you have time to chill and walk slowly.

You couldn’t enjoy the scenery for long. You should’ve realized why you didn’t see anyone, not with that giant robot who almost crushed you, and is now looking down at you.

The creature was massive, quadruple your size at the very least. Black, purple, and annoyed.

“Who… are you?” you took a step back, ready to zoom away at any moment. They didn’t answer you, though, only grabbing you. Before you could react, you saw a bright purple light consume your vision, and you closed your eyes so your retinas wouldn’t burn.

♢♢♢

When the light was no longer visible, you were somewhere you didn’t recognize. The walls were metal, and there were more… people? Whatever they were, but they were looking at you. One looked identical to the one holding you, but almost entirely blue. An all-purple robot with a single yellow eye stared down at you, emotionless.

“I found one. I barely saw anyone at the location.” the one holding you said.

“Strange,” the blue one pondered, “shouldn’t there have been more of these squishies at that place?”

You wanted to retort so bad, but you also knew that the moment you start speaking you might cough. And honestly? What goes on in your body is none of their business. It’s Saturday, you thought to yourself, no shit there’s barely anyone there.

“Hey, tiny squishy!” the blue one put his face close to yours, “Tell us how we can access that telescope!”

You sighed in defeat. “I don’t know, I’ve never been to the building it’s in.” Well, that was a half-lie. You have been to the science building, just not the room the telescope was inside of.

“You WHAT?!” Oh, they’re annoyed.

At this point, you were pissed. You wanted to get away before the pain gets you, and you started getting snippy, “I dunno, maybe you should’ve asked before kidnapping me BECAUSE MY MAJOR DOES NOT INVOLVE THE FUCKING TELESCOPE! My major is in tech AND NOT ASTRONOMY!”

There is a cough coming up. Wriggling an arm out from the giant hand grasping you, you coughed into the crook of your elbow. Blood, as per usual during shark week. For you, that is.

“What is that red thing that came out of her intake?!” The blue one’s blood red eyes widened.

“Do we have anyone who knows how to fix organics?” the one holding you asked.

You yelled, “I’M FINE! This is normal for me, at least my painkillers are in effect!”

“Coughing internal liquids is abnormal for any being.” The purple one with the yellow eye spoke. “Thundercracker, inform Lord Megatron at once.”

The blue one ran out of the room. That one was Thundercracker, from what you could tell.

“Put them on the table, Skywarp. I’ll check their systems.” the one with the yellow eye ordered. The hand gripping you plopped you unceremoniously onto the table, leading you to cough yet again.

When you got up, you noticed the blood you coughed up on the table. Guess you gotta clean that. Opening your bag, you got out the hydrogen peroxide spray and a few tissues. It was a familiar procedure; spray the bloodied surface, and then clean it.

“What even is that?” Skywarp asked.

“Hydrogen peroxide. It’s used to clean blood off things, including clothing. I’d use a paper towel, but all I have are tissues.” you replied.

A hand held your face, opening your mouth and pressing your tongue down with their thumb. The one-eyed robot tilted your head up, and observed.

“No anomaly in the intake pipe. Finding the anomaly might require an invasive approach or scans.” they removed their hand from you.

Oh hell no. If this was an OBGYN, you’d be fine with it. However, you are not, and giant robots probing your lungs and uterus and just anywhere inside you is the last thing you want happening.

“Absolutely NOT!” you yelled, “I’m not letting you do that to me! Just bring me back to campus before my painkillers wear off!”

“I don’t think I’ll allow that.” Wait, who the fuck said that?

“Lord Megatron!” Skywarp turned around, bowing down at a gray figure. You could see the red glow of their eyes from where you stood.

“So, this is the one you found. She’s smaller than Soundwave’s cassettes.” Great. Just great. They’re calling you small. “She will do just fine, even if she’s not the one we hoped for.”

“How in Cybertron can this squishy help us if she’s never been to the building that the telescope is in?” Thundercracker asked.

“You. You’re a student of the university, correct?” Megatron asked, looking at you.

“Yes?” you replied, unsure of what the gray robot was going to ask you to do.

“Good, good. Then you should be able to get to it for us.”

Pardon?! “I’m one of the tech majors, if I just walk into the building and go to where the telescope is, the staff will find it suspicious!” you protested, “The only time I’ve even been in the science building is when I was being shown around campus, and we never went into the room that the telescope is inside of! If I’m to go in that room, I’m going to need to explain to the department head as to why I need to go in there.”

“Along with that,” you glared at Megatron, “I want to know exactly why you want access to the telescope.”

Skywarp huffed, “Why would we tell you about that?”

“Because y’all kidnapped me! If you want me to cooperate, you need a damn good explanation.”

“It’s rather simple. If you humans have access to such technology, wouldn’t we be curious about how it works? Such technology would be useful to our cause.” Megatron explained, and you hated the condescending tone he was using. It reminded you of the times you’ve been to the hospital, begging for an answer to all the pain and too-heavy bleeding only to be spoken down to like a toddler. Claiming that what you experienced was normal when it very much was not.

You sighed, “Fine. If you want my assistance, I will only help you if you follow a few basic rules. Do not damage any part of the school campus, try to abduct anyone else, or even think of trying to destroy the telescope. If you violate these rules, I will not help you any further. I will lecture all of you about your behavior without hesitation if you do that.”

“But what if the Autobots start the fight?”

“I’ll lecture them too. Don’t fucking try me.” You countered. It’s been a long time already, you can feel the pain creeping up to a painful level. After grabbing another tissue from your bag, you coughed up more blood.

You need to get back to your dorm soon, if the painkillers fully wear off you don’t know how you can escape.

“Now, I’d like to return to campus before my painkillers wear off. Can you please bring me back?” you tried your best to be polite, but right now you’re starting to get desperate. It must have been an hour at the very least, and you need to get back before you’re paralyzed by pain.

“Not so fast, young lady. We never got your name, and based on what Thundercracker said, I’d rather have you be under supervision.” Megatron turned to the purple robot, “Shockwave, bring her to your lab and prepare the scanners. I’ll leave her in your hands.”

Oh no. Oh no no no no NO. That’s the last thing you want happening.

♢♢♢

A group of Autobots were on the campus, talking to various humans.

“I was looking outside the window during lab. This purple and black robot picked someone up, turned into a purple light and just… disappeared with them!” a tall brunet said, gesturing to the spot the abduction happened.

Prowl frowned. He knew it was Skywarp, no other Decepticon had that ability. He’ll have to inform Optimus Prime once he finished speaking to who he was speaking to.

“Do you know the student who was kidnapped?” Optimus Prime asked the young blonde-haired woman standing in front of him.

“Yes. Y/N L/N is my roommate. I know that today she’s starting her cycle, which for her is incredibly painful. She needs to take pretty intense painkillers so she can function during this. I didn’t see her before I left for work, but I made sure to get her a snack so that she could eat something when she got up before I left.”

“What is that cycle? Is this something that organic life experiences?” He asked.

She tapped on her phone for a bit before looking back up at the Autobot leader, “All animals with a uterus and ovaries have an ovarian cycle, in order to prepare for a potential pregnancy,” she showed the diagram on her phone’s screen, “the uterus creates a lining, which sheds if a pregnancy doesn’t happen in a period called menstruation, or just a period, for humans. This lining is called endometrium. This lining, however, can end up outside the uterus, and in rare cases can go all the way up to the brain. This is called endometriosis, and is what Y/N has and what causes her the intense pain.”

“For her, there is endometrium in her lungs. She coughs it out during her period sometimes.”

Ratchet approached the two. “You mention that, and earlier the painkiller she takes. How long ago was that?”

The woman checked the time, “About five hours ago, based on the time she usually wakes up on this day of the week.”

“And when does it wear off?”

She paused. “After six hours, she’s back to regular unmedicated pain.”

Optimus got up. “Thank you, Miss Emily. We will find her as soon as we can.”

“Can I come with you? I don’t know how willing Y/N is going to be while she’s in pain around strangers.” Emily asked, “I’ll do my best to stay out of danger, and keep close.”

Ratchet grimaced, “It’s going to be dangerous. I doubt we have any weapons that you can use, if you can even hold them.”

“I understand your sentiment, old friend. However, she has a point. I doubt that Y/N will be pleased to have more Cybertronians trying to take her. Especially if she’s in terrible pain.”

Sighing in defeat, Ratchet turned to Emily, “Fine. We’ll bring her along.”

♢♢♢

Before you could protest, Shockwave grabbed you and started walking away. You thrashed in his hand, trying to wriggle out to run away and hide. Your efforts, however, bore no fruit, and only made Shockwave hold you tighter.

He put you in some kind of container, too tall for you to climb out.

“Soundwave, can you come to my lab with Rumble and Frenzy? Lord Megatron requested me to do scans of the human Skywarp found. She’s being difficult, I need those two to restrain her so I can do the scans without her attempting an escape.”

“Understood.” a voice was heard, likely coming from Shockwave.

After some time, a cobalt blue figure walked into the lab. They were the same size as Shockwave. Two significantly smaller figures followed them in tow; one purple, one black.

“So,” the blue one looked at you, “this is the human?”

“Yes.” Shockwave replied, grabbing you and putting you on some kind of table. They removed your bag, so you couldn’t grab a hammer and thwack anyone even if you tried.

“Rumble, Frenzy, restrain the human so we can do the scans.” The blue one ordered. The small figures jumped onto the table, grabbing your limbs and pushing them into the table. Honestly? That’s pretty painful. You tried to fight, kick, anything, but their grip was unrelenting.

“Stop wiggling, fleshy!” one of them tightened their grip.

Some kind of scanner descended to your chest, stopping a few centimeters above you. It whirred to life, and a red light shone onto your chest. It shifted around, scanning from your chest to your pelvis. After a few minutes, the light turned off.

“Peculiar.” Shockwave stated.

“Is this what human internals look like? How strange.” The cobalt one tilted their head, then looked at you.

“Rumble, Frenzy, release.” They ordered, and the two robots holding you by the limbs released you. However, you couldn’t run, as Shockwave grabbed you. The change from laying down to being vertical made you feel the menstrual blood leak out of your cervix, sending shivers down your spine.

“Do you even know what you’re trying to look for? There’s nothing that you can base it on!” you yelled.

“Intuition.” Shockwave rebutted, putting you back in the container. Jarred once again.

The pain creeps up once more. The whole restraining debacle distracted you for some time, but now you realized that the medication is almost out. In a few minutes, you’ll be in fetal position from the pain. Even breathing is a struggle.

Alarms.

“Autobots infiltrated the base, I repeat, Autobots have infiltrated the base.” the announcement rang.

Shockwave and the others left, leaving you alone. This was your chance. Opening up your bag, you grabbed a hammer. Can you even break the glass? Might as well find out.

Walking to one of the corners, you slammed the hammer. A crack formed, and you continued to slam and slam and slam until a large enough opening was made. You walked out of it after putting your hammer away. After going to the side opposite the hole, you dropped and rolled onto the floor. It was time to run and find a small enough place to hide.

You ran out of the lab, zooming through the halls to find somewhere small. Somewhere you could fit and they could not. After a few minutes of running, you found a small slit in the wall that you could just barely squeeze into, so you went in it. It took some time, and your chest especially was squashed, but the slit went to a tiny area, where the slit was the only exit. Curling up into a corner, you waited. The slit is too short for the two who restrained you to fit anyway.

You heard fighting and yelling approaching you. From where you were, they couldn’t see you. After a bit of time, it quieted down.

Voices.

“We haven’t seen the missing person at all. Where could she be, Prowl?” one asked.

“Who knows? Y/N might be trapped somewhere.”

They know your name. Why do they know your name? You didn’t tell any of them your name.

Unless… they’re a rescue party? Moving was a struggle for you, the pain was getting too much. You doubt you could speak right now either.

“Wait. That tear in the wall. Could she be in there?” the voice pondered, getting closer to where you were.

“I’m checkin’ it. Emily’s with Blaster ‘n’ Wheeljack, right? If Y/N’s here, contact them.”

They know Emily? Your roommate? Well, that complicates things.

A large black finger entered the slit, widening it just a tiny bit. “Hey! Are you in there?” they asked. All you could do is whimper in reply.

“Don’t worry, we’ll get you out of here!” they promised.

“Jazz, I contacted them. They should arrive in a moment.”

More footsteps.

“We’re here!” a familiar voice trilled. They are indeed talking about that Emily, the one who is your roommate. Both of you are enrolled in the university’s STEM program, so you have a few classes together. You’re both part of the color guard as well, which is pretty well known for the futuristic masks that the marching band wears as well.

“Do you think you can fit through that? I mean, Jazz, he made it bigger, but it still looks small.” An unfamiliar voice asked.

“If Y/N can fit it, I can.” Emily said, and you heard her step in through the slit.

“That bad?” Emily asked. You turned to her and gave her the stink eye.

“Hey! STEM girlies gotta stick together, y’know? Stop giving me that look.” Emily retorted.

She took out your painkillers from her bag. “I hope yain’t mad about me yoinking your painkillers, I knew that by the time you were found the meds would’ve fully worn off and you’d need to take them again. Here,” she gave you the bottle. You did your best to remove the lid, took one, and swallowed it dry. Ideally, you would’ve had something to drink since it tastes absolutely horrible, but eh.

You put your painkiller bottle in your bag. Emily grabbed you by the waist, hoisting you up to your feet, “C’mon, up at it. Let’s get back.” Both of you walked toward the slit, and left the hiding spot.

There were four of the alien robots. They all had blue eyes, unlike the ones who abducted you.

“Prime, we got ‘er!” The one with a blue visor and black hands said. “We’re gonna get ‘em back now.”

“I’ll hold them.” A red robot said.

Emily introduced them, “The red one’s Blaster, the one with the two trapezoids where his ears should be is Wheeljack, the cop car lookin’ guy with the red eyebrows is Prowl, and the one with the visor is Jazz. They’re all good dudes, even if Prowl’s grumpier than my pawpaw.”

“Don’t call me old.” Prowl growled.

“How old are you again? You’re a peepaw in my eyes.” you could hear Emily’s smirk, it made you chuckle.

“At least she sounds better!” Jazz jokes, “At Prowl’s expense, that is.”

“Shockwave’s lab is nearby. I’ll catch up to all of you later, I think there’s something there that might be useful.” Wheeljack stated.

“Alright. Don’t get killed, Wheeljack.” Prowl ordered, and Wheeljack ran to the lab you escaped from.

Blaster brought a hand to you and Emily, “Well? Hop on, I won’t bite.” Emily brought you to his hand, and he brought you to one of his shoulders and put Emily on the one opposite you.

“Let’s go.” And so, the five of you left. You gripped onto one of Blaster’s neck cables, mostly for reassurance on your part. The bouncing of Blaster zooming made you bounce a little bit, but you knew he was trying not to make you two bounce too much.

♢♢♢

After you got on the small ship, you were met with a few other of the Autobots. The tallest of them was red and blue, with windows on his chest. Next to him was a mostly white with orangish red accents.

“Good, you found her.” The blue one said, smiling.

“Optimus, should I look at her? They might’ve injured her.” The red and white one asked. You coughed into your elbow again, and let go of Blaster’s neck cable.

“Y/N’s not injured from what I can tell, Ratchet. I was able to give her the painkiller.” Emily told the Autobot.

“Which tastes AWFUL.” you added.

“Right. I forgor, sowwy.” and now Emily is UwUing. Great. That’s usually reserved for when color guard practice happens, or when she pops into the band room to bring you and the other brass members some cursed snack that the store she works at sells. Usually with some kind of beverage for you. Emily may be cursed, but she’s an awesome friend and roommate. You remember the time she recorded you and several other brass members doing a reenactment of I Want It That Way by the Backstreet Boys. She’s a champ when she wants to be.

“Well, since you coughed up some endometrium, I’m going to take a little sample.” Ratchet grabbed some kind of scalpel, grasping your arm and using it to scrape some of that sweet sweet lung endometrium.

“I’ll ask Perceptor to look at it.” Ratchet walked away.

“Where’s Wheeljack?” Optimus asked.

“Went to look in Shockwave’s lab, I think he should be here around…”

The doors opened, and footsteps ran inside and the door closed.

“Now.” Prowl finished.

“Wheeljack, what did you find?” Optimus asked, with everyone turning to the Autobot.

“Well, there was a clear container that was broken in the corner. Guess that’s where Y/N was put. Along with that,” he showed a hologram, likely the result of the scans, “I noticed this on the screen.”

Optimus approached, looking at it. “Show this to Ratchet once he gets back.”

“We should bring these two back. I’ll inform the authorities that Y/N was found, and has sustained no injuries.” Optimus ordered.

“Jazz, navigate the ship to the university.” Optimus ordered, letting Jazz leave to the cockpit.

After a few more orders, and Blaster placing you and Emily down on the floor, the both of you were left with Prowl.

“Miss L/N, I have a question for you.”

“What’s the question?” you asked.

“Is there any way to reduce the pain, or how long it lasts without your medication?” Prowl asked.

You’d answer, but that involves telling Prowl about sex. And, to be perfectly honest, fucking anyone you barely know is a turn-off to you, especially a giant alien robot that is literally thrice your size. You do not feel fuckable right now, try again later when you’re not bleeding from the cervix and lungs my dude. Do they even have penises? Well, they could use their fingers… No, don’t be horny, Y/N. Are you still ovulating? That likely explains the fact that you actually considered explaining sex and possibly… let’s stop that thought.

“Well, heat can help a little bit.” Good save, Emily. Good save. “It all depends on the person, though.”

“Also, Jazz and Blaster wanted me to ask you this, but what is this… trombone suicide thing Emily mentioned?” Ah. Emily snitched to Prowl.

“It’s a very complex move involving multiple brass instruments, usually trumpets or trombones. If you turn the wrong way, you’ll either bonk trombones or smack your fellow brassist in the face. There’s also the trumpet suicide, sousaphone suicide, and I’m trying to figure out how to do it for the color guard. Also, you’re playing the instrument while doing this.” you explained.

Prowl sighed, most likely in relief, “It isn’t literal, at the very least. That’s a relief.”

After a few more questions, and fortunately sex did not come up during that time, Optimus came back.

“We’ve arrived, let’s get these two back.” Optimus announced.

Walking with him and Prowl, you got tackled by one of your band mates. A good chunk of the brass section and color guard were there.

“Glad you’re back, Y/N!” the one who tackled you said, helping you get up.

After some time, and a little bit of discussion, you and Emily left to go back to the dorm with the others. The sun was setting, and the events of today left you tired and having menstrual munchies. Hopefully you won’t have to deal with the alien robots again.

A mechanical bird observed from a lamppost, watching the two figures enter the building. Even though the Decepticons failed to keep the student from the Autobots, there was still an opportunity to use her. Once they were fully gone, the black and red robot flew away.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not buying toilet paper for my college dorm?

I share a dorm with my roommate and while at the beginning of the school year, we alternated buying toilet paper, ever since mid-November she has not bought toilet paper. at all. I'm pretty non-confrontational so I decided to buy toilet paper for both of us for a while, but then in February I decided that it wasn't fair and I hid my toilet paper and pretended we ran out and that it was her turn to buy toilet paper. When I need to go I just dig my toilet paper out from under the sink, use it, and then hide the roll again. However she has not bought any toilet paper and just uses her friend's bathroom when she needs to go.

I complained about this to my mom and my mom started lecturing me and said that my roommate probably struggles financially and that I should just buy toilet paper for both of us. However I'm using MY money for the toilet paper so if my mom wants me to pay for my roommates toilet paper she should send me like twenty bucks.

Last week, my roommate started using our bathroom again and I got really paranoid that my roommate had found my toilet paper stash and was using it so I checked under her sink and she has three rolls of toilet paper. Why isn't she sharing, I don't know. I'm perfectly content to continue this situation until the end of school because at least she's paying for her own toilet paper and I'm paying for mine. I won't use her toilet paper but I'm not sharing mine anymore. My mom says I'm being selfish though

What are these acronyms?

[illubean]

I saw ur celebrity Iso x bakery girl post and im in LOVE

May I req an art student!Iso x reader where Iso is roommates with another guy (either Phoenix, Gekko, or Yoru) and that dude has friends over with reader being one of them and tries to go find the bathroom but instead stumbles upon Iso's art room where he's painting away and doesnt notice reader? :3

And maybe reader leaves their number without him noticing until the guests all leave🤭💜

If You Need a Muse

Characters: Li Zhao "Iso" Yu Type: Fluff, Oneshot, Gn!reader

this request has sparked something within me... how do we feel about CeramicArtist!Iso smirk emoji also I changed the req just a tad bit >.<

Warnings: none

It wasn't often that your dear friend Jamie invited you over to his home. Your little group often spent time at Sunwoo's (who prefers to be called Jett) house or showed up at Ryo's uninvited. He was always too lazy to host or feared disturbing his roommate, but today he wanted for you all to play a console game he just bought.

You sat on the floor in front of Jett, who was on the couch battling against Ryo. You watched the game on the screen as you awaited your turn, as Jamie came from the kitchen with more snacks. Jett was currently losing, yelling and leaning into Ryo in hopes of throwing his game. You laughed before looking at your brown haired friend who sat on the floor next to you.

"We're not bothering your roommate are we?"

"Nah, I don't think he's home right now."

After about another hour of playing the game and eating junk food, you needed to use the bathroom. Setting your controller down you looked over to Jamie, asking for directions to the bathroom.

"It's down the hall, first door to the right."

You nodded, getting up and going on your way to find the toilet. You stopped in front of a closed door, pushing it open to reveal NOT a bathroom. You look around, taking in the room. It was well lit, the walls decorated with paintings in various sizes. In the center of the room was an easel, and a man standing in front of it who's gaze seemed to have shifted from the piece in front of him to you. He was wearing comfortable clothes protected by an apron, a paintbrush in one hand and palette in the other.

"Oh uh- Sorry. You must be Jamie's roommate, I was just looking for the bathroom."

He offers you a small smile before returning to his work.

"No worries, it's one door over."

From where you stood you couldn't really tell what he had been painting, but what you could tell was that the man himself was a piece of art. He had beautiful purple eyes and sharp features that you could almost believe he were a marble statue come to life. After taking him and the room in for a little longer you spoke up once again.

"Your art is very beautiful."

He looks up and smiles at you again before responding.

"Thanks. I'm working on pieces for my portfolio, though I don't think anything I paint could compare to your beauty."

You were left speechless as you felt the tip of your ears burn.

"O-oh. Thank you. I'll be- uh- going now..." You stuttered out, before turning and going back to your original task.

Find and use the bathroom.

After doing your business, you returned back downstairs to find that your friends switched to watching a movie.

"Geez, you took forever in there!" Jett complains.

"Did you take a shit or something?" Ryo asks, scrunching his face up at you.

The other two laugh at his statement before you give a response.

"I don't see how any of that is your business," you huffed. Instead of rejoining your companions in the living room, you make your way into the kitchen. There was a magnetic basket stuck to the side of the fridge with pens, some memo pads and sticky notes in them. You grabbed one of the sticky notes and a pen and begin to write your note. You look around for a place to set it as your eyes land on a coffee machine.

Bingo

The machine must belong to your friend's mysterious and attractive roommate, as you knew your friend didn't really enjoy coffee all that much.

You stuck the note on the bottom of a mug sitting underneath the machine before setting it back in place and finally returning to the living room.

{timeskip}

The next morning, Li made his way towards the kitchen for his daily cup of coffee. He would be headed off to class soon and needed a bit of caffeine to start the day. Jamie had already been up, also about to leave for class. After brewing his coffee and picking up his mug, ne noticed a yellow corner of a sticky note peeking out from the bottom.

Peeling the note off, confused, he brought it up to eye level to read.

"If you ever need a muse (or wanna go out :D) call me~ XXX-XXX-XXXX (Jamie's Bathroom Friend)"

A light blush dusted his face at the note. This had to have been left by his roommates attractive friend yesterday. He was so distracted buy the number written in front of him that he didn't notice Jamie peeking over his shoulder.

"That's why they took so long in the bathroom! Hah, looks like one of my best mates likes you."

The man gave his flat mate a firm pat on the back before going about his day. The light blush on Li's face darkened in embarassment at the realization Jamie had seen what was written. Drinking his coffee, he sat down and put the note in his pocket.

He would have to put the number in his phone later.