#one kiss series

[boltupbitches]

One Kiss - Nick Bosa Part 4

Contains 18+ content ahead

Natalie sat in her chair, staring blankly down at the floor where the puddle had now soaked into the carpeting. 

Her face was a mess. She just knew it from the dampness of her cheeks. Any makeup she applied lightly today was likely ruined now, yet she couldn’t find it in herself at the moment to really care.

The deep pain in her heart was suffocating.

She wanted so badly to be out of this situation with Mark and be done with him. Yet, she knew that by the way he acted just a bit ago that it wasn’t going to be easy.

He had his moments over the years of being rude and mean, maybe not as cruel as he showed today, but he had a temper. Normally it was never directed at her, but at others - especially when he wasn’t in control of a situation.

That’s what he was losing now. Control of her, of their relationship, and soon the reliability of financial support she provided him all of these years.

It was ending and even if they weren’t addressing it right now explicitly, they both knew it.

Natalie was done with him.

As her phone rang on the desk in front of her and broke her out of her daze, she saw that it was Nick attempting to Facetime her. 

She rejected the call and texted him to give her a moment.

He didn’t and immediately called again, this time a regular call.

She sighed quietly and picked up the phone to accept the call. “Hey.. sorry I’m not feeling up to a Facetime right now.”

“What’s going on Natalie?” He asked with concern, already picking up on her change in demeanor through her tone.

She was quiet for a few moments, breathing in a shaken breath and trying her best to not cry again. She was overwhelmed and stressed.

“Natalie?” Nick called her name urgently through the phone. “Listen, I’m coming over there now to pick you up.”

“What? No! Nick, you can’t show up here while I’m working! You have no affiliation with the company or me as far as anyone knows. Do you know how bad people will talk?” She spat out.

“Well, then what the fuck is going on Natalie? I’m fucking worried here. You have obviously been crying and you’re upset. What did that fucking piece of shit say to you? Did he touch you? Hurt you? I swear to god I’ll kill him.” Nick said darkly, his voice raising with each question.

“No, no. He didn’t touch me or cause any physical harm.” She insisted.

“But he said something or did something that upset you.”

“He was just being a dickhead, trying to sweeten me up and was digging around in my business.. Then when I told him to leave after implying I knew about his infidelity and the rumor about his mistress.. He lost his temper… He swiped the vase of flowers you bought me off my desk and they shattered everywhere..” Her breath hitched as she finished rushing the words out. She was about to cry again.

Nick said nothing as he heard her begin to cry softly once more.

“He’s so fucking awful. I’ve seen him this way with others.. But normally not like this with me. We rarely fought because I normally gave in and shut up to avoid conflict..” She spoke listlessly, staring blankly at the wedding ring on her hand.

In that moment she decided that she would never wear the goddamn ring again. Or the engagement ring from this point out.

“Natalie, can you take the rest of the day off?” Nick asked her calmly.

She was silent as she pondered the idea. She still had stuff to deal with at the office, but she was exhausted and she had a lot of unused sick time she could tap into.

Looking at the mess on the floor, she sighed. She’d have to clean that up herself. There was no way in hell she was going to get the day time maintenance crew to do it, or ask the department secretary to call for her.

As much as she got along with most people in her department, and the various other departments, the gossip culture here was insane. She wasn’t interested in being part of the latest narrative being spun around.

“Yeah, I can.”

“Good. When you leave, head over to your place to pack a bag for a few days. You’re coming over to stay with me for a bit until you see your divorce lawyer. This shit? It’s done, Nat.” He sighed through the phone. “I know you don’t want me involved in this to keep it as stress free as possible, but if he’s showing signs of violence, I’m not about to have you in your apartment with him while he still has access to the place. That’s a big fucking no.”

She was silent again as she processed what he just said. “What if he tries to contact me?” 

“Tell him you are staying with a friend and you are not interested in seeing or talking to him right now. Let your supervisor and the building security at your work know he has no clearance to be visiting you and that you don’t want him on the premises. You don’t have to give a reason beyond a current safety concern.” He rationalized calmly.

Natalie felt silly at that moment. She worked in HR herself, and yet she was here depending on Nick to help her make an action plan and solve her problems. ‘You’re too old to be depending on someone else to help fix this shit.’ She thought bitterly.

“Natalie.. Stop.” Nick sighed through the phone. “I can practically hear the gears in your head shifting on my end. I know you don’t want me involved in all of this.. Ok? I know, but I am now and I’m not staying out of it when it comes down to your safety. I don’t care if this is a once or twice thing that he’s shown physical aggression towards you. The fact that he felt comfortable enough to slip up and show that side to you is reason enough for me to keep you safe from him.”

She knew he was right. Something felt off with Mark. There was a malicious vibe that he was giving off when she attempted to set her boundary with him firmly. His mask had slipped and she saw something ugly under the surface staring back at her before he destroyed her gift.

“Ok.. ok.” She said, breathing a few times to calm herself. “I’m going to let my supervisor know that I’m taking the rest of the day today and tomorrow off due to a stomach bug.. He shouldn’t say anything against that.. I’ll call you when I get to my apartment and get my stuff packed, ok?”

“Ok, and Natalie?”

“Yeah, Nick?”

“I love you. It’s going to be ok. You’re going to be ok. We’re going to be ok. Once this is done and over with, he’ll never be able to bother you again. I swear on it.” Nick said firmly.

And the double meaning to that last part wasn’t lost on Natalie.. Mark would either leave her alone as the law ordered him to in the end.. Or he would be forced to one way or another by other parties..

“I love you too.” She said back, smiling slightly at the sound of his chuckle. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing, nothing.” He insisted, sounding happy and relaxed again. “It’s just.. When you say it back to me, it makes me happy. That’s all.”

She felt her cheeks flush and her own grin take over. “Well, you make me happy and give me butterflies too when you say you ‘love me’.”

“Yeah I tend to have that effect on people.” He brags jokingly, before saying, “But only you have that effect on me, babe.”

The call ended and she sat back with a loud sigh. It was time to start handling this shit now before it got worse. 

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Natalie was beyond happy when her supervisor suggested she take the next week off to get her affairs in order. It was an extremely difficult conversation to have, but one that needed to be addressed. Her cheeks were still flushed red with embarrassment over how she had broken down crying while spilling her situation to her boss.

Fred Matthews was a kind man and one too good for the cut throat business they worked for. Often someone who reminded her of her own father, she was relieved when he offered her sympathy for her situation and assured her, “Natalie, you have my word that Mark Collins will not ever be allowed to step on company grounds again. We’ll update security for the building to have him on the ban list. And this situation? We’ll be sure that no one takes part in gossiping about it. If you hear anything indicating so, please let me know and we’ll take action. Domestic violence is not a joke.” His eyes were burning with anger as he spoke to her calmly. 

They set up a game plan which gave her a week of work while he excused her for a family emergency. During that time, she would have the opportunities to change the locks on the apartment, update her apartment’s building security on not allowing Mark on the premises, file a PFA, and meet with her divorce lawyer. 

Nick was anxious about the whole situation as well. As soon as she got out of her meeting and packed her office away, he was calling to see if she was ok.

He called again sometime after she spoke with her building manager, got the locks changed on her apartment, and updated building security.

She felt bad over how worried he was about the situation. “Nick, baby. I am finishing up packing my last bag now. I’ll be there in 30 minutes.”

“I know.. I’m sorry. I have been going crazy waiting here for you. I keep waiting for you to call and something bad happening again.. Are you sure you don’t want me to come over and help you finish packing?” He pleaded.

“Nick.. I can’t allow that. I am almost done, ok? 30 minutes.” She sighed.

He was silent on the other end and she worried for a moment that he hung up. “Ok.. Just.. Nat, know that you don’t have to do this alone. I know you worry about what others will think about you or say, but honestly? Who gives a fuck? Your marriage is over and you’ve been all but legally single for months. You know that and your lawyer will argue that too in court when they bring forward how he was the one to not only break his vows to you, but also was stealing money from accounts that he did not have his name on or access to. You don’t have to walk alone and I am not letting you do that anymore.”

She nodded and wiped her eyes that were beginning to tear up while he spoke. She knew he was right, but she just wanted to divorce quietly and not attract additional attention - much less from media given who Nick was and did as a professional. An NFL player having an affair with a married woman over 12 years his senior? Yeah that would make a great news story. 

She knew if they made it long term, they’d go public and her age would be picked at, but being labeled an adulteress was not something she was keen on - especially by people who didn’t know the circumstances for why she and Nick grew close and started the affair.

“You’re right. I’m sorry I’m making you feel like your support isn’t needed. It is. You’ve done so much for me, Nick.. so much. And I’m thankful you’re in my life and came when you did. Thank you.” She said tearfully. 

“You’re welcome, Nat. Anything for you.” He said back. “I’m holding you up on finishing up. I’ll let you go and I’ll see you soon. I have burrito bowls made up for dinner tonight. Hope that’s ok.”

“Absolutely,” She said cheerfully. “You know I love Mexican food. I love you and I’ll see you soon, ok?”

“I love you too. Drive safe and call if you need anything.” He insisted.

After the call ended, she quickly finished packing up. Just as she was getting ready to carry both duffle bags and her backpack out of the bedroom, she stopped for a moment and slid both her wedding ring and engagement ring off her finger. Looking down at them, for a moment, she contemplated just how freeing it would be to no longer be Natalie Collins. Soon, she would be Natalie Romaine once more.

“I won’t miss you.” She mumbled to the set and dropped them into the jewelry box on her dresser. 

Heaving her bags up in both hands, she exited the room, gently kicking the door shut after her. 

After she closed the apartment door and made sure to lock it securely, she sighed once more. Staring at apartment 113 made her think back to the first time she ever bought this place, newly wedded and in her 20s. She dreamed of hosting dinners here with colleagues she would meet and befriend. Maybe the spare room they used initially for home office work would someday be converted into a nursery. She had so many dreams and so many plans.

Looking at the same door now, she felt nothing but melancholy. This place brought her pain. Many nights alone and crying. Coming home to an absent husband and eating dinner on her own, the silence being her only companion. Dinners left in the microwave that went uneaten. Bottles of wine consumed on the couch as she cried to her friends about Mark. And Mark and her arguing about his absences and rumored infidelity.

The only good thing that came from that apartment in the last few years was her drunkenly messaging Nick in her bathroom. 

Funny enough that was the changing point to everything and more.

She knew she’d be back here in about a week or so to get more belongings and get her mail. However, she wasn’t keen on the aftermath of Mark’s freakout when he realized that she cut him off from access to not only her apartment, but all of her financial accounts that weren’t joint accounts. She was going to leave him to drown in his mistakes. Her sympathy for him was non-existent. 

After making her way down to the parking garage and loading up her stuff, Natalie got into her car and headed out to Nick’s place.

Things had a funny way of moving both fast and slow at the same time. Mark’s freakout in her office was only mere hours ago, but it felt like days to her. Her decision to divorce was only a few weeks ago, but it felt yesterday.

Time was a social construct after all, and it left Natalie disoriented with the actual time passed between events in her life.

She knew, however, that no matter how disorienting time and reality was for her currently, Nick was the one thing to anchor her to reality. She decided then, that going forward, she’d make sure he knew that his presence was appreciated and wanted. 

If not for him, she would have never made the move to end her marriage.

Love was strange.

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Nick was waiting for her in the parking garage at his apartment complex. She called him just as she pulled in the parking garage. 

She was surprised with how quickly he made it down to her just as she pulled her car in next to his Tesla.

She turned the car off and was unbuckling her seatbelt when Nick opened her car door for her and pulled her into a hug as soon as she got out.

She happily sighed as she snuggled deeper into his embrace. She felt warm, safe, and loved. In his arms she felt like she was home.

He buried his head into her neck, breathing in the scent of her perfume and pressing a kiss against her pulse. He pulled back just enough to press a kiss to her lips, groaning slightly when she nipped his lip playfully. He opened his mouth and squeezed her ass playfully as her tongue slipped in to play with his.

After a few moments, they separated, both gasping slightly and grinning at each other.

“Man, it’s only been two days since I got to touch you and it feels like it’s been an eternity.” He complained. “I kept checking the time on my phone and double-checking my messages and calls to make sure I didn’t miss any calls from you.” He admitted with a sheepish smile on his face.

“Awww. My bear was feeling needy.” Natalie cooed, playfully poking his cheek.

Nick pretended to bite her finger and instead captured her hand, pressing a kiss to the top of it and staring at her lovingly. “I was. I hate being away from you for more than a day.”

“I missed you too.” She bit her lip. “I am happy that I’m finally here now though. In fact,” She gestured behind herself, “wanna help me get this stuff upstairs and we can eat? I’m starving.” 

Nick nodded and moved to the trunk of her car. “Pop it and let’s go.”

She popped the trunk and moved to help Nick, pouting when he gently swatted her hands from the bags. “I can carry one, Nick.”

“Nah it’s fine. I got the duffle bags. You can carry the backpack and purse.” He insisted.

“Ok.” She backed off on that, knowing Nick was definitely not letting her lift anything above 5 lbs at this point. And honestly? Compared to her, those duffle bags probably felt light as a feather to him. Why throw her back out when he had no problem lifting them?

In the elevator, Natalie turned to stand in front of Nick and wrapped her arms around his waist, she nuzzled her head into his chest, stopping to press her ear against the left side of his chest, listening to the soothing sound of his heart beat.

Nick said nothing and allowed her to do so.

When the elevator dinged and the doors opened to his floor, he looked down at Natalie with a smile. “You’re home, Nat.”

She smiled back at him and they headed for the apartment’s front door.

After making it inside, Nick gently sat her bags down and took the backpack from her as she shrugged it off. 

“I hope I didn’t overpack.” She joked as she sat her purse down on the coffee table. “I put so much stuff in them.”

“Well,” Nick stretched his arms outward, “You could bring all your stuff here if you wanted. If anything, you probably won’t be wearing half of your pajamas anyways. You know that.” He shot a cheeky grin her way.

Natalie shoved him playfully as she made her way into the kitchen, him following after her, no doubt eyeing up her ass in the leggings she was wearing. “You have a one track mind.” 

She knew what he meant though. The nights she spent over usually ended with them sleeping naked or next to practically nothing. Nick was a skin contact person and loved to have Natalie’s nude form pressed into him.

She never slept that way before and was extremely shy the first time it happened, but over the last couple of months she had grown accustomed to it.

Nick had wandering hands a lot too. They would be laying in bed, completely spent after lovemaking and she’d feel his hands smooth up and down the slope of her back and lower body.

When they laid snuggled together, his hand would trace circles on her hips or knead gently into her stomach area. He’d plant kisses on her shoulder and neck and nuzzle into her.

She realized that his love language was touch. They didn’t always have to verbally communicate what the other needed. 

One evening, when she stayed over, she spent time on her computer responding to emails she missed the day prior.

Nick, who was watching game film on the other side of the couch from her, had gotten up without a word and came back with a cup of hot chocolate made for her.

After pressing a kiss to her head, he went behind her and gently kneaded her shoulders.

Back to the present, he was warming up the burrito bowls his professional chef had made for them. Knowing Natalie would be staying with him for a while (or indefinitely if he could get her to seriously consider it), he went ahead and asked his chef to start doubling the prep amount.

Natalie was snacking on a bag of tortilla chips near the island counter. She went ahead and poured herself a glass of red wine and was sipping on it as she absentmindedly watched Nick finish warming up the food.

Between bites, they chatted about how Nick’s practice was today. At one point, he lamented about one particular reporter, Grant Cohn, and how much of a pain in the ass he was every time he was there with the press.

“He baited Kinlaw into an argument and then tried to use it to escalate shit further. I don’t understand how this man still has a press pass. It doesn’t help either that he’s constantly trying to egg on players with his articles, video titles, and tweets. The man is just looking to get his ass kicked so he can sue. He’s a weasel.” Nick grumbled.

“Did your coach push to get his pass revoked? Surely there’s some type of repercussion for this guy?” Natalie wondered.

“I don’t know. I know Shanahan was pissed about the whole thing. He was mad about how Grant Cohn hides behind his daddy any time shit hits the fan.. And he was mad as hell at Kinlaw for engaging with Cohn. None of us like Cohn. For a guy who’s supposed to be a Faithful, almost all of his content is just him shitting on us left and right.”

“I don’t follow sports journalism much.” Natalie started to say, stopping to ponder for a moment, “They use a lot of yellow journalism tactics similar to political media journalists and gossip/mainstream entertainment journalists.”

“Yellow journalism?” Nick wondered aloud. “What makes something yellow journalism?”

“Didn’t you study communications in college?” Natalie teased.

He chuckled at that, “Yeah well I was a good student, just doing enough of my school work to keep good grades and my place on the team. Beyond that, I didn’t really delve too much in my studies. I kind of regret that now. In a couple years I’d like to go back and finish my degree with Ohio State.”

“I get it,” She said, taking a sip of wine, “Yellow journalism is when journalists engage in exaggerated or false content without actual evidence or citation. Meaning, they can spread gossip and allege an anonymous source, but there is really nothing concrete to prove their claims are true.”

“Like fake news?” Nick asked.

“Yep.” She said, “Exactly that. Yellow journalism is lazy journalism. It’s a shame too because there are amazing journalists out there that do a lot of work for their communities and sometimes even sacrifice their safety and career security to publish pieces. Not all journalists partake in yellow journalism, but it’s enough that the opinion on the profession has gone to shit by the general public.”

“You know a lot about this.” Nick raised his brow in interest, listening to her explain things.

“My dad was a local journalist.” Natalie smiled sadly. “He wrote an expose that caused a shit storm back home. I was a kid growing up, but I remember us having to leave our house due to the media wanting to interview him. He spoke with many victims that were former patients of a nearby state-run mental hospital. Many of those victims or their families spoke to him over a series of a few years in which he gathered and published a damning story about the various forms of abuse that were going on there and being left undocumented, and how the administration were committing health insurance fraud.” She stared absentmindedly at the glass.

“Wow.” Nick said, impressed by what he was hearing, “Your dad sounded like a great man, Nat.” 

She smiled sadly at him. “He was. I miss him everyday.”

Nick reached his hand over and grabbed hers gently. He gave it a comforting squeeze and said, “I’m sure your dad would be super proud of who you’ve become. I can’t imagine how anyone wouldn’t be.”

Natalie smiled back at him and lifted his hand up, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of it. “Thank you, baby.”

“Anytime.” He smiled.

—------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At some point they had made it into the shower.

Nick wasted no time in pressing Natalie up against the shower well, lifting her to wrap her legs around his waist. He moaned loudly as he pressed his lips roughly to hers, prodding her lips to open up so he could dive inside.

Natalie gave him entry, her hands making their way up, around his neck, and into his hair, tugging at the brown tuft at the top of his head.

“Fuck.” Nick gasped as he pulled away from her momentarily. He eyed her up for another moment or two before moving to press his face into her neck. He sucked a few hickies on her collar bone area, knowing they had to be in places she could hide a little easier. 

He adjusted her position so he could grind his hardened erection into her core. The spray of water against his back, couple with the steam of the shower and Natalie’s panting felt like a warm fever dream that he didn’t want to come out of. 

“Please.” She begged. “Please fuck me.”

“You want it?” He teased her, “How bad.”

“So bad.” She pleaded. “Please, please Nick.”

Nick pretended to think for a moment before grinning devilishly at her and bring his one arm in front of him, his other supporting Natalie’s weight.

He grabbed his cock and tapped it on her pussy a few times, listening to her breath hitch when he did so. Lining up at her entrance, he pressed himself in and immediately moaned at the sensation. “Fuck,” He grunted as he continued to thrust into her, finally buried as much as he could be in this position. “God, you’re so fucking tight.” He rolled his eyes upwards in pleasure when he felt her squeeze around him tightly.

Natalie was no better, her head was thrown back, mouth agape, as she was gasping at the amazing sensation of being so full.

Nick was above average in size. Even fully clothed you could tell he was packing down there.

No matter how many times they fucked, it felt like the first time all over again. He was big all over and it took a few moments to adjust to the sheer size of his cock entering her.

As he started to thrust shallowly, Nick kept his eyes glued to Natalie’s face. “Baby, look at me. Let me see those pretty eyes.”

Natalie did as he demanded and stared at him with hooded eyes, “Hmm?”

Nick bit his lip and smirked for a moment as he picked up intensity and momentum, his free hand moving to rub her clit. “If only you could see yourself right now.” He taunted. “So drunk off my cock. You love it don’t you?”

“Mhm.” She nodded, unable to articulate words in that moment.

“I love this pussy so much,” Nick gasped. “Your tight, pretty pussy. So soft and so sweet. It’s my pussy, right?” 

“Mhm.” She hiccuped.

“Tell me, Nat. Whose pussy is this?” He suddenly jerked his hips forward with one particularly rough thrust.

“Yours!” She cried out.

“That’s right, baby.” He grunted.

Suddenly he stopped thrusting and lowered Natalie onto her wobbly legs, being careful to support her as she stared at him in confusion. “Why did you stop?” Her legs were shaking from how electrified her body felt. She was horny and wanted to finish getting fucked.

Nick pressed a kiss onto her lips, reaching his hand out to pinch one of her nipples as he did so. He pulled back and gave her a commanding look. “Turn around.”

Natalie blinked but did so. “Nick?”

He adjusted her stance and lined himself back.

She knew right then and there what he wanted to do. “Please.”

Nick pushed in and got to work. His thrusts were hard and rough, just the way he knew Natalie liked him being. 

He was in awe as he stared at her form from behind. His hands were holding her waist as he pounded her, watching the way her ass shook with each thrust, the dimples in her back more pronounced as she arched his into each thrust, hungry for me. She had her head thrown back with her light brown hair tossed over one side of her shoulder, its soaked strands sticking to her skin as she pressed her chest into the cool tile in front of her.

Nick was mesmerized at the sight of his cock thrusting in and out of her with the shaking of her ass in tandem. 

His hand let go of her waist and he smoothed his hand over her right ass cheek, careful in lining his hand up just right. He wanted it to sting the way she liked it, but he didn’t want to hurt her.

She knew what was about to come and moaned louder as her hand reached down to rub her clit. Had they not been in the shower and soaked from the water, she was certain her wetness would have dampened her thighs with how turned on she was.

Without warning, Nick’s hand clapped down on her ass cheek, making her cry out loudly. He did it three more times, stopping to rub the reddened skin each time.

“Fuck..” Natalie moaned. 

“You like that?” Nick egged her on. 

“Yesss.” She whined. “Pound me, baby. Please, please, please. I want it so fucking bad.”

That was all Nick needed to hear.

He picked up his pace, pounding into Natalie from behind as his hands gripped her hips tightly. 

He was balls deep in her, head thrown back when he felt her suddenly squeeze around him tightly as she tensed up.

He continued to throw rough thrusts forward into her, letting her ride out her orgasm as he felt the familiar tell-tale signs of his own orgasm building.

“Fuck..” Natalie whined at the aftermath of her orgasm, feeling super sensitive as Nick kept thrusting into her, it was so intense. “Cum for me, baby.” She pleaded. “Give it to me.”

“You want it inside?” He checked with her, his words coming out winded as his thrusts started to falter with the stutter of his hips.

“Hmm.” She moaned, her head turned to look back at him with pleading eyes. She bit her lip and nodded. “Feel me up. Give it to me, baby.”

Nick moaned loudly at that and felt the familiar band of pleasure snap, his vision going white for a few seconds as he pressed himself tightly into Natalie, feeling his cum shooting streams into her. His hips reflexively thrusting through it.

After a few moments, he leaned forward and pressed his head into the crook of her shoulder. He pressed a few kisses there, panting against her neck. He stood back up carefully, and pulled his spent cock free from Natalie’s warm heat. He hissed at the sensation, but quickly turned his attention to the cum slowly dripping out of Natalie’s opening.

He reached forward, scooping some of it up and pressing his fingers into her, in a way to shovel it back in.

“Hmm.. what are you doing?” She giggled, her hips wiggling at the sensation.

“Didn’t want any of my guys to go to waste.” Nick answered back, faking seriousness before breaking into a silly grin.

“Your guys?” She asked him, shooting him a look over her shoulder.

“My swimmers.”

“Nick, you know I’m on birth control, right?” Natalie asked seriously.

“I know. Doesn’t mean a man can’t dream.” He answered her seriously, staring directly at her as he said it.

“You want kids with me?” She asked in surprise, turning around to face him.

“I want everything with you.” And he meant it. “You could wake up tomorrow and tell me you want a baby. I’d give it to you.”

“Nick.. a baby is a big responsibility. I mean.. You’re young and you have a whole career that requires a lot out of you.” She said gently. 

“Natalie… there are people younger than me who do my job and have kids. Hell, there are guys coming out of high school and into college, that want to go pro and do, all with kids and a girlfriend.” He said with frustration. The age situation was for sure a touchy subject for him. “I’m just saying that if you want a baby someday, then I do too.”

“There’s always a chance that you might change your mind later,” She said, trying to be careful in her word choice, but knowing that what she just said hurt him a bit from the flash of pain in his eyes.

“Natalie.. I’m not Mark. I didn’t change my mind the night I found out you were married and invited you over. I didn’t change my mind when I took you on dates and canceled my plans with teammates to be with you instead. I didn’t change my mind when I decided to tell you I loved you and asked you to divorce Mark. I have never changed my mind. I am here. I will be here tomorrow, next week, and forever as long as you’ll have me. I’m not changing my mind. I want you.” He said, frustration and pain clear on his face.

She nodded and reached up to cup his face with both hands, forcing him to look into her eyes when he tried to turn his head.

Even in the water, she could tell his eyes were tearing up slightly from the frustration. She gently wiped the tears away and smiled up at him sadly. “I’m sorry, Nick. I keep making you feel like you’re just a kid and it’s not fair. I’ll continue to work on changing the way I look at things. It’s hard sometimes, I won’t lie. I’m just so scared of stuff going to shit before we can even get off the ground properly… Right now, I don’t have plans to have a baby,” She watched him nod and could see the disappointment just briefly in his eyes before he schooled his expression, “But someday when I’m ready and we are no longer having to be together in the shadows from others, I’d want one with you too.” 

He smiled at that and pressed his forehead into hers. “I’d do anything for you, Natalie. I fucking love you.”

She smiled back, staring into his eyes, enamored with the pure look of want and love in his eyes, “I love you too, Nick. So fucking much.”

They stayed like that for a few more moments, basking in the comfort of the other’s company.

Natalie was scared for Nick’s reputation and future. She knew they’d have to talk more about it another time, but a baby just wouldn’t be a good idea at the moment for either of them.

While drying off and watching Nick brush his teeth, her hand instinctively went to her abdomen, pressing into it as she thought about it. ‘Yeah.. not now.’

Life, however, had other ideas on the matter.

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WANDEE GOODDAY | EP10

[abbycadoodle]

happy pride month!!! and happy anniversary to the silliest love-driven quest in all the galaxy :D

(no text version under the cut)

[stevebabey]

part one here. ze part two to touch-starved stevie that absolutely no one requested hehe <3 but i gots to let my boys have a wee kiss :")

So, hugs with Eddie become… well, a thing.

Not a thing. They’re not a thing, Steve and Eddie. It’s totally the same as when he gets hugs from Robin. Eddie’s doing him a favour as a friend. It’s got the 100% platonic energy of getting a hug from a friend — a hug that usually melts into some form of a cuddle, limbs all tangled together until they can’t tell whose are whose.

Except, Steve doesn’t really do that second part with Robin. Like he hasn’t done it ever with Robin.

So, it’s an Eddie thing.

But they’re not a thing. Not matter how much Steve would actually very much like for that happen. Okay, maybe Steve’s overthinking the whole thing a bit, but he just can’t tell.

Where’s the line? It’s infuriating not being able to discern between platonic and more, just because Steve wasn’t held enough as a fucking baby. Out of all the things he resents his parents for, Steve’s surprised that this is so near the top.

Because, sure, Steve’s had more than his fair share of hookups. He knows that sort of touch. He knows the shape of lust; the scrapes of fingernails down backs, the tight grips over skin, the push and pull of the heat of the moment.

And this thing with Eddie… is not that.

So, really, Steve knows that it’s all friendly. Eddie is just being nice. He’s being a decent dude and helping his friend out — by catapulting himself into Steve’s arms at every opportune moment.

(Steve’s only dropped 3 mugs of coffee because of this so far. It’s only because Eddie says good catch, big boy with a devilish grin every time that Steve manages to catch Eddie that Steve hasn’t completely told him to knock it off. Just yet, at least.)

And he’s different in other areas. He’ll always seem to choose the seat next to Steve on movie-nights now, content to snuggle right up to him. They get thigh to thigh, arm to arm — and Eddie only needs to get about 20 minutes in for him to do a big sigh, like an old dog, and slump over, resting his head on Steve’s shoulder.

Steve notices though. He always notices.

It’s impossible not to— the skin, even if there’s 3 layers between them, burns blazing warm. Eddie’s hair drapes over his arm, a curl inevitably tickling along Steve’s collar. He can feel the rise and fall of Eddie’s breathing, the little shake of when he laughs.

It drives Steve a little insane— insane in the way that makes him think about burying his fingers in those curls again, about pressing his lips against Eddie’s pretty mouth just to feel the smile against his skin, about digging into his chest so he can climb into his chest and live there.

Yeah, it’s— well, it’s safe to say that the effect of Eddie’s touchiness has sent what was once a fleeting thought of a crush into mind-melting levels of affection.

But he can’t fucking tell.

-

To Steve’s credit, neither can Eddie.

Which is not surprisingly considering sometimes he catches himself wondering how the hell he ended up here; in a close-knit friendship with band-geek Robin Buckley, princess Nancy Wheeler, and King Steve Harrington.

Okay, the Robin one sort of makes sense. He thinks that if no matter when their paths crossed, he and Robin would’ve always even some sort of strange friends - her snark complimenting his bitchiness. Also, the whole super queer thing helps too. Even the friendship with Nancy works, in its own weird way.

Steve though? He’s the fucking curve ball.

It works though, the two of them. Surprisingly well, actually — the two of them get on like a house on fire, bitchy quips back and forth. Even better, is the quiet that they can share. Steve loves to come around and do… nothing. Do nothing with Eddie, though.

So, even though Eddie had noticed the tension in Steve with touch, little moments where he turned rigid when Eddie’s usual wandering hands got too comfortable — Eddie chalked it up to the usual. Guys bring too uncomfortable with him, too weird about another guy being touchy. It didn’t matter than Eddie wasn’t even out to Steve yet, he was still might be that type of guy.

Well, Eddie had certainly thought so. Sure, Steve might not be one of those jocks who smacked around boys who looked too long in the locker room, but if he knew a smidge of the truth, who really knows. It would explain the tenseness at least.

But then— ‘Can I… have a hug?’ There had been a dozen things Eddie was thinking that Steve could’ve asked for but that? Wasn’t even in the ballpark. It was so left-field it left Eddie speechless for a whole moment. And Steve had been staring at the ceiling, his hands curled up tight again like- like he thought Eddie might say no.

A ridiculous thought, honestly. Anyone who knew Eddie well enough knew he was touchy; loved giving it, loved getting it. Like an overly affectionate cat, Wayne had once called him, just 11 years old, because Eddie’s need for affection seem to never be sated.

After that night, Steve’s lack of touch became far more obvious. It’s always hair ruffles or high-fives, yet never hugs. Normally, Eddie would keep to that boundary; some people are less touchy other than others, he knows that.

But… “Sometimes I realise it’s been awhile, since I’ve had some touch.” That’s what Steve had said, his words. Eddie doesn’t even think he meant to say something so heartbreaking. In fact, the guy seemed embarrassed.

It had thrown Eddie for a loop— because Steve gets around. He’s nearly notorious for one-night stands and failed flings, as Robin loves to drone on about considering she’s subjected to all the flirting. What had originally been a point of envy for Eddie, just saturates the bleakness of Steve’s words. Sex but without a moment of intimacy.

So, while Eddie is miles away from being the person who gets into Steve’s pants — not for lack of want, mind you — he does try hike up the touchiness. Little things. Lingering when he taps him on the arm, hooking his chin over Steve’s shoulder to peer over it, leaning up against him when they’re side by side watching a film.

It’s good. It helps Eddie release the pressure of his stupid monumental god-awful crush he has. Yeah, yeah, it’s laughable, even to Eddie. It’s like Gay 101; don’t get crush on straight dudes, especially the ones you’re friends with. And yet…

Steve lets him. He lets Eddie give him touch, more than he lets anyone else. He still tenses; there’s still always a moment before he can remember to relax, like he’s trying to shake off bad thoughts but then he melts. He always melts into Eddie’s touch eventually — in a way Eddie knows Steve actually loves it, drinks it up as much as he can.

And maybe, Eddie is the biggest fool to grace the Earth to let that fact give him some hope. Sue his gooey heart, he’s a romantic. It’s a quiet hope but, it’s there.

Tonight, it seems relaxing for Steve is been harder than usual— several times has Eddie traced a quite long along Steve’s arms, a subtle point that they were far too tense for someone who was wrapped up in cuddles on the couch. ‘Cos that’s 100% what they are now. Eddie will still call them hugs, but usually, when it’s just the two of them, it becomes this.

Steve, tucked up into the corner of the couch, one leg flush along the back of the couch and one hanging off the edge. It’s the prime position for Eddie to crawl up, wind his arms around Steve’s middle and give him a good squeeze and then settle there. Head on Steve’s chest, lying in the cradle of his hips. Safe. Warm.

It makes him warm, oh very warm to know that he gets this. That Steve doesn’t give this amount of trust to many, if any, other people but Eddie — he trusts Eddie.

“Y’know,” Eddie says, cheeks smushed against the plain of Steve’s pec. It feels deliciously warm and Eddie’s fairly sure he can feel how toned it is just through his cheek. Hot bastard. “I’m actually real glad you asked for that hug all those weeks ago.”

He leaves it there ‘cos he knows Steve will ask. Eddie’s eyes stay on the buzzing tv-screen even as Steve’s head shifts, turning to peer down at the boy slumped on his chest. Eddie’s pretty sure he can see Steve’s mouth twitch up into a smile.

“Yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” Eddie affirms, giving a nod and his eyes flick up to meet Steve’s for just a moment. “Think I’ve had some of the best hugs in the world.”

Okay, that was maybe more honest and sappy than Eddie was going for. He is just letting Steve know he isn’t just doing it for Steve — that he enjoys these moments just as much. He lays it on thick, tries for a smarmy angle.

“Swept up in these pillowy arms?” He croons, giving Steve’s bicep a quick squeeze, making the other chuckle softly. “Who wouldn’t think so? I’m a lucky guy.”

Despite the joking tone, there’s no quick comeback from Steve. That’s alright. Eddie’s quite happy if this is one of the times Steve just takes the compliment; let’s the word sink in and hopefully, believes them, even if it’s just a little bit. He watches the film and doesn’t read into the silence.

Not even when Steve says, “Eddie?” all soft. Nearly shy sounding. It doesn’t quite register to Eddie’s ears.

“Mm?”

“Eddie.” Steve says again, a little firmer and that catches Eddie’s attention. He turns his head and rests his chin on Steve’s chest, his brows drawn together in silent question.

But the moment he makes eye contact, Steve’s doing that scrunched up face again. Is studying the ceiling instead of facing Eddie. And just like all those weeks ago, his hands clench up tight. Twists up the fabric of Eddie’s sweater in between his fingers and uses it to ground himself.

Last time, he asked for a hug. Considering he’s currently just about squishing Steve beneath his body weight, Eddie can’t fathom what he might be worked up to ask for. Unless he was going to ask for something more than a hug— which, well, just wasn’t going to happen, even if Eddie really wanted it to.

“Can I-” Steve starts. He sucks in a breath, almost like he’s gathering courage. But he’s not, because he’s not about to ask for what Eddie hopes for, he’s not, he’s—

Unless…?

“Can I… have a kiss?” Steve asks, barely audible. The sentence is murmured, soft words that hit Eddie like a gentle kiss in itself — imprinting right onto his heart. Steve Harrington wants a kiss — from him!

“Oh.” Eddie says, in a breathy delightful way. He’s fairly certain the little monkey in his brain is clapping its cymbals at double-speed as the words process; or maybe it’s his heart, which feels like it’s leapt up his throat.

“Oh?” Steve echoes, a smile already playing at the edges of his mouth, because he can see Eddie’s want. Because he knows him.

“Yes.” Eddie says suddenly, with a frantic nod, pushing up closer so their faces are aligned. “Yes, absolutely, you can.” He affirms.

Steve huffs a quiet laugh at the eagerness and then his arm that had been slung around Eddie shifts. It moves up til his hand caresses along the line of Eddie’s jaw, tilting him just how he likes.

Eddie holds his breath. Counts the freckles he can see this close. Tries to feel Steve’s heartbeat through where they’re pressed so closely together; can Steve feel his? Thundering and hurried, beating so hard Eddie thinks he might bruise the inside of his ribs.

Then Steve kisses him. And shit, Steve’s lip are better by ten-fold than every daydream Eddie’s ever had about them. They’re warm and so soft — plush and pressing against his own and Eddie is freezing. Fuck, wait, how does this go again? Right, Eddie’s never… well, kissed anybody before.

Steve pulls back and Eddie screws his eyes up — not ready in the slightest for the disappointment of his own shoddy kissing skills. Fuck, did he really just freeze? Steve — Steve Harrington — asks for a kiss and Eddie decides to stab himself in the back by not figuring out how to fuck to kiss back.

“You call that a kiss?” Steve teases and Eddie’s well aware of the parallel — of the irony of Steve repeating his own words back at him. But he can’t make himself laugh even though it’s funny. Instead, a little groan wiggles out his throat.

“I’m sorry,” Eddie says, earnest. He forces his eyes opens — he needs to see what’s Steve’s thinking. Where he’s expecting disappointment or perhaps regret, is only patience. Maybe a touch of concern. Eddie continues, despite the humiliation that makes his throat sticky.

“I haven’t- I don’t do this often.” He coughs awkwardly clearing his throat and hoping it hides the next word. “Ever.”

There’s a jump in Steve’s eyebrows, a moment of surprise in his eyes that lets him know he did, indeed, hear that final word. It makes Eddie feel… well, it’s nice that Steve had expected him to have been kissed by now. Even if he hasn’t. He tries to take it as a compliment.

“That’s okay,” Steve assures. Absentmindedly, his thumb rubs soothing along Eddie’s jaw. It makes Eddie shiver, some outrageous amount of joy clawing into every nerve. Steve likes Eddie. He wants to kiss Eddie.

“Do you want to try again?”

Eddie nods before the questions even out of his mouth. Steve smiles, all sunshine. This time when he draws Eddie in, he notices the way Eddie holds his breath — the rigidness in his body.

Steve kisses him again, another short and soft one and then whispers against his lips, “Relax.”

‘Cos isn’t tonight just full of the parallels, Eddie thinks. He listens, tries to focus on how sweet Steve’s kiss is than his panicky heart, forcing out a breath between the kisses. His hands along Steve’s sides find a grip, grounding and good, and by the fourth kiss, he begins to feel a bit melty.

It’s good. It’s really good. Kissing Steve is top 5– nay, the top moment of his life so far. Somehow, it’s made all that much better knowing the build-up behind it. Knowing that Steve knows he isn’t just kissing him for a heat of the moment — that Eddie wants kisses here, kisses before bed, in the morning, on dates. Eddie wants Steve.

And with the way he kisses, Eddie’s pretty sure Steve wants him just as bad.

It doesn’t take long for Steve to reach what Eddie decides is an ultra pretty fuckin’ state; lips swollen from kisses, cheeks flushed, hair a little mussed up. He bets he looks no better. The thought makes him grin, enough they have to break the kiss ‘cos Eddie can’t stop his stupid happy grin ‘cos shit— he actually gets to have this Steve.

“What?” Steve asks, somehow half heart-eyed and half suspicious at the mischief in Eddie’s eyes.

“Can I... have a hickie?”

now with a part three !

[gunsatthaphan]

never let me go ep5 // we are ep5

[boltupbitches]

One Kiss - Nick Bosa Part 5

Natalie rubbed her hands nervously down the front of her skirt, adjusting her top again and checking her hair in the mirror. She wasn’t certain why her fixation with her reflection had her holed up in the bathroom of her lawyer’s office, but here she was.

She had been ill the past two days, nauseous and weak. She chalked it up as nerves since today would be the day she would officially begin her divorce proceedings. It was nerve-wracking. She had a face full of makeup to cover up the dark eyes, but she knew the puffiness of her face was still there, no matter the cold compresses she applied to her face. ‘Probably my cholesterol or blood pressure from stress eating.’ She thought as she gently prodded her right cheek, watching the fullness of her cheek bounce back immediately.

Nick had been on edge as well. He couldn’t take off from practice in the middle of the season and instead settled with checking in on Natalie while at the facility. 

She knew he was worried about her, but she was starting to worry that her baggage was impacting his game.

—------

Nick had come home yesterday evening in a bad mood. He didn’t call like he typically did when getting out of practice and instead came right home, breezing past Natalie to the bathroom and shutting the door loudly behind him.

She wasn’t sure what was up with him but decided that working outside on the patio was the best bet until he cooled off.

About an hour later he made his way outside and squeezed onto the outdoor sofa, pulling her into him and breathing deeply.

After a while, he spilled about how he had gotten into a disagreement with a teammate who was making remarks about him being too distracted for their upcoming game in a few days. It turned into an exchange of words and both men ended up getting sat down in their head coach's office where they were thoroughly chewed out for their conduct.

Natalie remained quiet throughout his tale, not interrupting him and waiting when he paused for him to continue. After he finished, she gently pressed a kiss to the crown of his head and said, “I’m worried about you, Nick.”

He lifted his head off her shoulder lazily and stared at her with confusion, “What do you mean? I’m fine.”

“Well,” She started to say, biting her lip and thinking for a moment how to word it. “I just worry that all of my stuff is going to hurt you and your job. You have a contract extension coming up next season. I don’t want to contribute to your distractions.”

Nick sighed and sat up, rubbing his hands over his face and staring blankly ahead at the setting sun in the distance.

Natalie quietly packed away her laptop and folder, promising herself she’d finish up her work tomorrow.  She was still bundled in her sweatshirt as she shivered at the cold sensation from the evening breeze. 

Nick had noticed and pulled her gently into him, wrapping his warm arms around her as he pulled her into his lap. He pressed a kiss to the corner of her draw, moving across her cheek with gentle pecks until he pressed his lips into hers, his lips coaxing entry as his hand snuck into her yoga pants. He pulled back and stared into her hooded eyes with his own. “You’re not a distraction to me. You keep me focused and you give me a purpose outside of my career. Don’t ever think you’re hurting my career. Let me worry about that shit.” He pressed his lips into hers once more.

Natalie pulled back and nodded softly, her body already humming the second he pressed a kiss to her jaw. His fingers dancing along her panty-line wasn’t helping the heat pulling between her legs.

It didn’t take long until they were back inside with Natalie sprawled out naked on the couch, her back arched as Nick pumped his fingers into her cunt, his tongue pressed against her clit as he teased her to completion. 

She didn’t have to wait long until she felt the tell-tale sign of her orgasm approaching, her legs raising and her back tensed as the band snapped.

Nick had wasted no time lapping it all up, making sure to keep eye contact with Natalie as he sucked his fingers clean of her essence.

She eagerly rode him the second he sat down, her legs trembled as she mounted him. She had cried loudly as her legs burned and shook with the force at which she was bouncing on him.

At some point, Nick had picked up that she was tired and slowing down. His hands held her hips firmly as he took over and bounced her on him, a smirk on his face as he heard her incoherent cries of pleasure and pleads for him to go harder.

And that was how their night went, Nick keeping her distracted from her divorce lawyer appointment, and her giving him the physical touch he so desperately craved when not in her presence. They were a mess, but they were a mess for each other.

—----

“Well,” her lawyer, Matthew Stern, sighed loudly. “This is quite the predicament. I am impressed with the amount of work you’ve put in to gather evidence, Ms. Collins.” He stared at the financial transactions in his hands, “You say that he has been funneling this into another fund?”

Natalie nodded. “I believe so.. He has a child on the way with his mistress. I found out through social media, but I have not confronted him directly on the matter yet. I think the money is either for the child or for him to keep hidden if we divorce and he’s taken by the mother of the child for child support.”

“It’s always a possibility, and not the most shocking one, unfortunately. Much more common than you think among divorcing couples.” His face pulled into a frown. “Mr. Bosa mentioned that you had some safety concerns as well.”

“I’m sorry?” Natalie asked in shock, “I..um.. Mr. Bosa?”

“Yes, Nicholas Bosa.” He gave her a knowing look. “I spoke with your boyfriend this morning before you arrived. He mentioned covering the fee for all of this and brought up a few things he thought would be helpful. A nice man, Ms. Collins. I’m glad to know you have someone on your side in this whole ordeal who is supporting you. It won’t be easy if the husband decides to contest and drag this out in court, which seems likely.” Mr. Stern explained in a matter-of-fact tone.

Natalie nodded dumbly, her brain still processing that Nick was somehow now involved, by his own volition, in her divorce efforts. She wasn’t sure what she was feeling in that moment. Anger? Sadness? Hurt? Embarrassment? Frustration? It was a toxic cocktail of feelings that she choked down along with the bile rising in her throat. 

“Excuse me, I think I’m feeling sick,” Natalie said nervously, standing and gripping the arm of the chair she was just sitting on as she swayed forward for a moment, her head suddenly feeling light as the room started to spin slightly. 

“Ms. Collins!” Mr. Stern shot up nervously and made his way around his desk to help steady her. “Let’s sit you down.” He helped her back down and yanked a trash can over to her in case she threw up.

He quickly whipped out his cell phone and called his secretary in immediately. “Stay with her,” He instructed as he stood up, “she looks like she’s going to pass out. I’m calling an ambulance.”

Natalie was sitting there in a daze, a cold sweat breaking out as she leaned forward and heaved into the trash can, her skin clammy and pale as she shook. 

The secretary held her hair back, trying to keep Natalie steady as the woman slumped more into her seat. “Ms. Collins?” She asked nervously. 

Natalie couldn’t bring herself to answer as her eyes closed and darkness consumed her consciousness.

—---------

The steady beep was the first thing that Natalie noticed, followed by the all-familiar smell of disinfectant that let her know she was in the hospital.

She squeezed her eyes tightly before opening them, her eyes blinking as she took in the darkened room with just a sliver of light coming in through the doorway. Shifting, she flinched as she felt an uncomfortable tug on her wrist and looked down to see an IV set up in her arm.

She wasn’t dreaming. She really was in a hospital room. “What the fuck?” she called out, unsure of what the hell was going on in that moment.

“Nat?” a deep voice asked drowsily. 

Natalie turned her head to see Nick sprawled out on a pull-out recliner next to her bed, his large frame barely fitting on the furniture as he had a blanket draped over his shoulders. He must have been sleeping. 

Nick blinked a few times before quickly coming to fully and leaning up to turn the light on above them.

Both of them blinked in shock at the sudden brightness. “Fuck, sorry. My bad.” He groaned out, turning the light off again. “I don’t know how to use these switches in here. I’ll buzz for the nurse.” He mused as he reached for the call button and pressed it.

Natalie said nothing as she pressed her head back against the pillow beneath her. “The last thing I remember was seeing my lawyer at 2 pm.. What time is it?”

Nick checked his phone and said, “10:00 pm. You’ve been sleeping this whole time. I got you moved into a private suite until you’re discharged. There was no way in hell I was letting you out there to get sick or something if you had to share a room.” He said as he put his phone away.

Natalie nodded, not wanting to push back against what Nick said just a moment ago. She was just glad that the spinning sensations and nausea were finally over. “How did you find out?” She knew he wasn’t on her emergency contact form.

“Mike Stern called me as soon as the ambulance took you. Gave me the hospital name that he got from the EMT. I was just getting out of the facility when the call came through. I quickly got here. They wouldn’t let me see you at first. Thankfully, Stern’s assistant rode along in the ambulance and had your stuff. I had to use your phone to call your mom to get permission for them to talk to me.”

Natalie groaned. “You spoke with my mom, Nick?”

Her head was starting to hurt and her heart rate went up a bit, making the monitor beep loudly.

Nick leaned over and rubbed his hand down her cheek, “Woah, woah. It’s ok. Your mom was nice about everything… She said she’d talk with you more about everything when she flies in next week.”

Natalie nodded and looked away, blinking back her tears. She was frustrated that more and more people were getting involved in all of this. This was one thing she wanted to handle herself. She wanted to tell her mom at a later date.

Nick noticed her silence and opened his mouth to continue talking when a knock at the door interrupted them. “Come in.” He called, his eyes still glued to Natalie’s sullen frame. He reached up and turned the lights on, wincing at the brightness now alighting the room.

“Mrs. Collins?” the doctor asked as she moved out of the doorway and allowed the nurse in behind him who moved to Natalie’s side and proceeded to take her vitals.

“That’s me.” She said flatly. Her head was killing her and at this moment, she couldn’t find it in her to fake friendliness. 

“I’m Dr. Kenneth and I’m in to speak with you about your condition. I heard you passed out today after experiencing a few days of nausea and weakness. Is that correct?” The doctor moved to her side and sat down on the stool in the corner of the room. 

“Yes. I was at an appointment. I haven’t been feeling well, but I figured it has been due to a stressful situation I’m dealing with in my personal life.”

The doctor’s eyes darted to Nick and back to her, a silent question there, asking for assurance that she was safe. 

“Oh - no, I’m ok. He’s my boyfriend.” She rushed to explain. “I’m going through a divorce currently with my estranged husband… and it’s just been a lot on me.”

Her doctor nodded along. “Have you been experiencing anything different with sleeping, eating, or your menstrual cycle?” Her eyes glinted knowing behind them.

“Um.. not really?” She was unsure, worried where this line of questioning was going. 

Nick had caught on as well and had perked up in his seat, leaning forward with his hands clasped in front of him, waiting to hear more.

“Ms. Collins, my reason for asking is because we noticed something with your blood work. You results came back that you are pregnant.” She spoke softly.

Natalie just stared at her blankly, not understanding what she was saying to her. “I’m sorry. I’m what?” 

“You’re pregnant. How far along, we aren’t certain of course, but it appears to be early on in the pregnancy. Which explains the bouts of nausea, exhaustion, hypersensitivity to sounds and light, and the extra stress.”

She stopped speaking and stared at the couple in front of her.

Natalie was clearly in shock.

Nick? He was staring at Natalie, more specifically her stomach area tucked under the blanket. There were tears in his eyes as he wordlessly reached up and wiped the corner of his eye, catching the stray tear that was streaking down his cheek.

“I’m going to go ahead and leave you two to discuss the results. Other than the pregnancy discovery, Mrs. Collins, all of your other labs came back fine. Please be careful with your stress as it can exasperate symptoms and put additional stress on your system.” 

She stood up and reached out to shake Nick’s hand, gripping his large hand tightly as she offered him a close-lip smile. “Congratulations.” She turned back to Natalie, “Please give us a call if you need anything additional. We are going to keep you tonight just for observation to make sure you’re okay and aren’t experiencing any signs of further fainting spells.”

After the doctor left with the nurse, the room was silent once more, save for the rapid heart rate and breathing of the two in the room.

“What are we going to do?” Natalie asked him, her eyes unsure as she searched Nick’s eyes. “Nick… this isn’t the right time.” Her eyes teared up. “There’s so much going on with my divorce. This isn’t a good time.”

Nick nodded and lowered his eyes, not wanting her to see his disappointment at the reminder of reality. Their situation wasn’t ideal. A 5-month affair with a married woman wasn’t on his bingo card for 2022, but here he was. A soon-to-be-father wasn’t planned either.

Yet he was conflicted. He wanted this more than anything. He wanted to marry Natalie and have children with her. He wanted to come home to a family of his own. He wanted it more than he wanted a Super Bowl ring.

For the first time in his life, his career felt so minuscule to the feelings he felt with Natalie in his arms. With her, it was tunnel vision. He thought of her every morning and every night. Whether together or apart, she was on his mind. The books he read or the tv shows he watched, he thought of sharing them with Natalie.

He didn’t realize that he too was now crying softly, openly as the tears poured down his cheeks. He felt frustrated at the circumstances that surrounded their relationship.

In a perfect world, he would have met Natalie, an unmarried woman. They would both be happy at the unexpected news of a baby. She would have met his mom already and had dinner with his dad and stepmom. She would have met Joey and his grandma.

But right now, right now was reality. And reality wasn’t so warm and inviting to the idea of this fairy tale.

Nick wiped his eyes and looked back up at Natalie, forlorn but with understanding behind the pain in his eyes. “I’ll support you, Natalie, in whatever you decide.” His words hurt to speak aloud.

Natalie was crying with him, gently reaching her hand out as an invitation for him to come closer to her. 

Nick got up and crawled in next to her, carefully tugging her against his chest, careful of her IV as he held her shaking frame. He pressed a kiss against her forehead, closing his eyes and breathing in the faint smell of her shampoo. Her face was pressed into his sternum, the fabric of his shirt damp from her tears.

They were heartbroken and unsure, but they had each other. Whatever Natalie decided, she hoped he had meant it when he said he’d be standing by her. She couldn’t stomach the idea of losing him right now - or ever.

Nick felt her breathing even out as she slipped into a much-needed rest. He continued to lay there with her, not wanting to move her. Instead, he adjusted the blanket over the two of them as he stared down at Natalie’s sleeping form.

He hoped she’d consider keeping the baby.

[admireforever]

One Day

[benevolenterrancy]

(Unseen Academicals, Terry Pratchett) I think Shang Qinghua and Ponder Stibbons should have tea and compare notes about somehow accumulating so much behind-the-scenes power by doing menial jobs no one else wants that they could basically run the show if they wanted...

meanwhile we have Shen "meh good enough" Qingqiu

[poomphuripan]

MINGJOE + 'genuine' kisses

↳ My Stand-In (2024) dir. Pepzi Banchorn Vorasataree

[naturecalls111]