#okay - pizza here I come!

[unexpectedbrickattack]

babpy.

[voidsentprinces]

[ask-the-totally-real-peppino]

Happy Holidays to Pep and the gang!

Pep: "..."

Pep: "Mrrp!"

Pep: "Niaga uoy ees ot deticxe ma I!!! Syadiloh yppah!!! Sdneirf olleh!!!"

Pep: "Kool emoc! Enoyreve rof staert gnikam yad lla ysub neeb ev'ew!"

Pep: "Olleh yas sdneirf ruo! Kcirb ,kool kool!"

Brick: *happy greeting squeak!*

Pep: "Enoyreve rof eikooc a edam ew! Kool!"

Pep: "Sdneirf, uoy rof tsuj eno laiceps a s'ereht dna!"

(Happy holidays to you too! Everyone can't be here right now, but I hope you guys enjoy a little bonus post for now, hehe)

[boyfeminism]

this job is so stressful to me like. im doing okay im doing better than i started but ive basically been put into a pseudo management position with very little real responsibility other than "fix it" and "advocate for it" and even less power to make it happen but like. i Hate management and i have a hard time sticking up for myself and keeping a cool head when doing so, which means when someone who i Know doesnt do his job is giving me bullshit numbers its hard to know where to give ground and where to be firm. and this kitchen is a disaster but like other baking jobs have Such a high standard that like. would i even manage a job where the kitchen Wasn't a total sinking ship? ive got less than a year of baking experience, mostly in bread, and everyone wants pastry. a chef from corporate asked me if id been to culinary school and it was both flattering and made me feel like kind of a fraud. a sous chef (who i really liked but her last day is tomorrow) asked the same and when i said no elaborated that i carry myself and have the attitude of someone who did (in a good way) which was Also flattering but like. she sent me a pastry position she found online that wanted someone who knew how to do laminated pastry and it just. i feel so small!!! this is something i like a lot and the new head chef of the baking department says he can tell i have talent and im eager to learn and he knows i can do this and that im doing a good job so far but its genuinely so stressful i think about work constantly ive never worked a job where ive had this much expectation put on me.

plus its so insulting when they tell me my product "doesnt look good" bc theyre 1) premade frozen bullshit and 2) packaged poorly bc we have no other options. fuck off dude you come and make these shitty turnovers, asshole. i know how to tell when a cookie is done. fuck off. like i am the First to tell you when something ive made is not up to my standard, not in a self depricating way but in a constant effort to do better. i Know when the cookies are too dark. I know when the turnovers didnt get egg washed. i know when the batter was overmixed. i know when something is Off but i dont know the cause and know when to ask someone who should know more than me. i dont need you to tell me when something is off, Especially when like. it isnt lmao

[sobeautifullyobsessed]

Ah, the Ravenous Saturdays have set in. This time I took care to be well prepared. Plenty of left over pizza from yesterday, plus a couple of pieces of chocolate cream pie, in the mini-fridge. Birthday indulgences, thanks to a very lovely friend🥰🥰

[deathfavor]

When i tell you my patience is at fucking 0 right now fhjsdfg its okay i dealt with it. ima go disinfect my sisters room so i can be out of the living rom at least

[fushitoru]

i can't stop looking at his d—d—d—d—FACE!

pairings ⸺ (SEPERATE) boy next door!gojo x reader, wrestler!toji x reader, gym trainer!sukuna x reader, pizza delivery boy!choso x reader, husband's boss!nanami x reader, perv on train!geto x reader

summary ⸺ jjk men as overused p0rn/h3ntai plots! inspired by this awesome post by the talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular @/osamucide! pls check it out and the rest of his work :3

warnings ⸺ SMUT (mdni), consent is pre-established in all scenarios (but dub con just in case), everyone is of age (or older), exhibitionism, infidelity in nanami’s, pussy drunk men lol, not edited (as always), cowgirl, missionary, creampies, VERY public sex in toji’s, art by 3-aem, lmk if I’ve missed anything!

a/n lolll i'm ngl this was so fun to write. some of these scenarios are so funnny hELP. this one is also for some of the anons who are so obsessed w choso and sukuna in bridgerton au. wrote them for you 🫡 choso’s is my fav hehe

NEW: part 2 here

general masterlist

SUKUNA RYOMEN ⸺ HOTTIE'S PERSONAL TRAINER HAS A VERY HANDS ON APPROACH!

“Brat!” Sukuna’s voice cuts through the air like a whip. “Watch your back. You’re supposed to be hinging your hips back, not whatever lazy shit you were doing.”

He steps around to your side, the heavy thud of his boots on the gym floor adding to the oppressive weight of his presence. Squatting down, he sets his hips back in one smooth motion, demonstrating with sharp precision. “Like this. Not whatever the fuck that was.”

You glance at him, your legs trembling under you. Sweat clings to your skin, a thin sheen that feels heavy after the grueling thirty minutes with your personal trainer. Sukuna definitely takes the "tiger mom" approach, every tattoo on his body echoing the sharp, uncompromising authority in his eyes. Right now, those eyes bore into you, narrowed with impatience, his hands on his hips. His scowl is practically carved into his face—stone-hard and unmoving.

Breathing hard, you slump forward, hands gripping your knees as you gasp for air. Your heartbeat drums loudly in your ears. “Sukuna, g-give me a sec. I just—fuck—” You can barely string a sentence together between gulps of air. “I just maxed out. My legs are literally shaking.”

Sukuna clicks his tongue, shaking his head in disappointment, but his voice softens—just a little. “Fine. Catch your breath. But as you do that, let’s practice proper form.”

You nod exhaustedly, not being able to think very clearly. Wiping the sweat to prevent it from getting into your eyes, you put your legs hip width apart as Sukuna gets behind you to observe your form. You bend down, trying to sit back onto your hips as best as possible, but as soon as your ass grazes Sukuna’s crotch, you lose the form in your back in surprise. “Sorry—”

“That was wrong.” Sukuna’s voice is in your ear as he puts his hands on your hips, and you are dizzy with the contact. “Here.” Both of you squat down, Sukuna’s hard body moving right behind you, and at the lowest position, Sukuna’s thumb roves over the fat of your ass, and they leave your hips to trace up your back. “Your back should be neutral, otherwise you’re going to hurt yourself.”

“O—okay,” you breathily reply, dizzy with the way he was touching you. If you listened closely, it almost sounded as if you were whimpering. Unfortunately for you, it seemed like Sukuna was more observant than you had hoped because he was looking at you in suspicion, eyes raking up and down your figure to observe your appearance. Disheveled, chest rising rapidly, sweat dripping right in the middle of your breasts—

Sukuna, out of nowhere, grabs your hand and begins walking away. “Come with me. You’re not doing them right.”

Soon, you’re led into one of the gym’s stretching rooms—the private ones, the ones meant for Sukuna to help you after the workout. 

“Sukuna, what are we—” you breathlessly ask, but you’re quickly shushed by Sukuna as he hoists himself on the massage table.

“Come here,” he motions to his lap, and you wordlessly follow his directions, sitting directly on top of his lap, gasping as you realize there’s a bulge making contact with your pussy. “We’re going to try an alternative way of doing squats, one that involves a bit more cardio.” He pulls down his sweatpants, blushing, furious cock springing out as he pulls down your yoga pants.

Soon, you’re moaning as you slowly take in his cock, sliding down as his precum and your copious amount of slick mix and drip onto his pelvis. Your feet are on either side of his legs, making you squat every time you lower yourself down on his length.

“Fuck! You’re so tight.” He slaps your ass as you bounce yourself rapidly on his cock. “Pretended to not know how to squat just for me to put this fat cock in you, isn’t that right?”

You didn’t have the capacity to answer, just moan as his cock hits your spot. Unsatisfied with your pace, Sukuna flips you both over until your back is on the table. 

“Oh fuck yea,” Sukuna pants, hips pistoning into you rapidly, effectively fucking you into the table, and his quads are bulging in sheer strength as they clench and unclench in reflection of his pleasure. “Didn’t know my client had such a sweet pussy.”

KAMO CHOSO ⸺ SHE ORDERS BIG SAUSAGE PIZZA AND GETS HER DEEP DICK CRAVINGS FILLED! (the title is so ridiculous im crying)

“Your total’s $14.93. You’re five bucks short.” The delivery boy—an emo looking guy with hair in space buns—responds to the wad of cash and coins you had just given him. He couldn’t look any less bored than he was as he stared down impassively at you, hot, steaming pizza in one hand.

"Wait, but I ordered a small?" You ask him in confusion. "I couldn't possibly finish a large one by myself!"

He pulls out your receipt from where it was tucked into the pizza box. "Your order said a large." Upon glancing on it, you look that he was indeed correct—right next to your pizza, the size LARGE glared at you through the sheen of the reciept's paper.

"Oh," You said, dumbly, blinking in confusion. "Well, I can pay the rest in card if that's okay."

You get an impassive "I don't have a card reader."

"Oh, okay," you laugh nervously, hand going up to scratch the back of your head and fiddle with the rest of your fingers. "Okay, well," you squinted at his nametag, "Choso, let me just check the remaining cash I have. You can come inside if you'd like." 

He comes inside, dropping off the pizza you ordered on your kitchen counter as he makes his way to sit on your couch. You go to your bedroom, checking your desk drawer for any loose cash you may have stored but to no avail. Heart racing and nervous, you frantically search the upper shelf of your room, on your tiptoes as you look for your money jar, praying that there was a 5 dollar piece of cash lying around. Instead, your fingers crash against some book propped on it, tumbling down onto the floor with a large thud!

You hear footsteps coming up to your bedroom door. Choso, standing near the door. "You good?"

"Yea," you strain, still reaching up high to grasp at the jar. "I'm just trying to find somethi—”

The heat of Choso's body surrounds you as he presses closer to you, reaching up effortlessly to grab at the money jar. His groin presses against your backside, acutely aware of his breaths as he passes you the jar. 

Which is empty.

"Fuck!" you curse. You turn, looking at Choso in anxiousness, as you notice he hasn't backed away at all. "I'm sorry, but is there any alternative way to pay for the pizza? Again, I'm really really sorry for the hassle."

"You have to pay for the food in some sort of way," he says with a stony face. Your mind is racing, thinking of ways you could pay but coming up short.

As a result, you end up with your face stuffed against your pillow, the hot delivery boy plowing and drilling his cock into you. 

"Fuck, so irresponsible. Couldn't even pay for the pizza she ordered without a stranger's cock inside of her." At his dirty talk, you whimper and squeeze your pussy, Choso groaning as a result.

"What was that?" He grabs your hair and pulls your face up as his tongue traces the frame of your ear. "What were you trying to say, you cockslut?"

"'M sorry!" You squealed and babbled, eliciting little ah! ah! ah!'s as he continues bumping his cockhead against the gooey spot inside your pussy.

"Yea, you better be. Wasting my fucking time. I'm going to come inside, got it?" Choso growls as he continues pistoning his hips inside.

GETO SUGURU ⸺ ANIME GIRL GETS HER PUSSY FINGERED ON PUBLIC TRAIN!

He pulls you in for a deep kiss while rutting inside you. "Aren't you my good girl? Taking this cock for me like a good girl?" You squeal, blabbering nonsense as he fucks you into next Tuesday…

You read the smut from your favorite author on Tumblr, devouring each word while remaining stony faced as the train rocked underneath your feet. In the corner facing the doors, you made sure that you were angled in such a way that no one would be able to see the filthy things you were reading on your screen. 

However, the metro was slowing down and you looked up quickly—which was painful, considering you were so invested in the story—to make sure it wasn't your stop. As the rush of foot traffic simultaneously populated and vacated the metro, you paid no attention to the people behind you. After all, other people would be too busy on their phones to see what you were reading, right?

"You're going to take this cum, right? I'm going to breed you, my sweet, sweet girl." He laughs.  You take a moment to take in his pretty features. Long hair, beautiful face, all filled with lust for you...

You scan the words, blush evident on your face as your favorite writer has done it yet again. Adjusting, you squeezed your thighs for relief and toyed with the hem of your skirt, failing to notice the soft breaths trailing down the back of your neck just because of how enthralled and taken you were with the plot.

And then, a hand trailed up your thigh, catching you by alarm. You almost drop your phone in your rush to turn and look at the creep that was touching you, ready to beat the shit out of him. 

But when you do turn, you stop and widen your eyes. The man in front of you seems even prettier than the fictional man you were reading about, and you take him in as he rubs circles on your thigh. His sultry eyes rake down your figure, his lips pulled back in a knowing smirk. "That's some filthy shit you're reading."

Looking at him, your heart starts beating faster solely because of the promise of what his hands would do as they were currently softly stroking your thighs, getting closer and closer to going under your shirt. "I—I—uh sorry—I—"

"It's okay, pretty girl." He gives you a kiss on the side of your neck. "Continue reading it. Can you do that, baby?"

You nod, not trusting your voice. Coincidentally, you're at the part where the man helps the girl masturbate, rubbing and teasing her pussy up and down. The man behind you does the same, teasing your lips while refusing to delve inside your panties, no matter how badly you want him to do.

"That feel good?"

You whimper. "Yes—ah—it feels good. Please touch me on my pussy directly. Please."

The man behind you chuckles, and your knees buckle at how rich his voice is. You would join a cult for this man. "Since you asked so nicely, I will. Call me Suguru."

His fingers pull your panties aside and enters, soon knuckle deep inside your cunt, and as quietly as you can, you moan his name as he continues fingering you in front of all the strangers on the train. His hips press closer to your ass, and you throb even more at the huge bulge he’s sporting. He’s sloppily licking on the outside of your ear, right where you’re sensitive, and you shiver and lose yourself in the pressure even more.

The pleasure was building in you steadily and Suguru groans. “That’s right, take it all.”

You almost jump when the PA sounds. "The next stop is Shinjuku."

“That’s my stop. You have to cum before then, or you won’t be able to cum,” Suguru whispers in your ear, speeding up and hitting your g-spot with precision. There are tears forming in your eyes as you make an effort to stay quiet, especially with Suguru giving seductive kisses to your sensitive neck. 

“Fuck, you got so tight,” he groans. “Gonna cum?” He uses his thumb to rub fast circles on your clit, and you see stars. 

“I will—I will,” you cry, as the throbbing and pulsing sensation grows faster and faster until finally, you cum with a muffled cry, because Suguru has his fingers in your mouth to ensure you don’t scream out on this very, very public train.  “Squeezing my fingers so much, relax,” Suguru laughs, popping his slick-coated fingers in his mouth. “You gonna do that to my dick next?”

NANAMI KENTO ⸺ BEAUTIFUL WIFE HAS TO FUCK HER HUSBAND'S BOSS! (NTR)

“Mr. Nanami,” you scrape a hand through your hair and clear your throat. “You wanted to see me?” 

For a moment, your husband’s handsome boss eyes you down, catching on the top button of your blouse currently unbuttoned. You mainly did it because of nervousness, the heat of the room escalating with Nanami Kento’s presence. After a long bout of intimidating silence, he finally speaks. “I assume you can guess why you are here?”

You bounce your knee as you sit across from the man, and you suddenly start sweating. Of course you can guess. Your bum of a husband—the one currently under your charge—neglects to do his deliverables, choosing to take comfort in the fact that you were his higher-up to trust that he would not be getting terminated for his lack of responsibility. 

But what he doesn’t know is that you’ve been begging Nanami not to fire him, despite the propelling and clear reasons to do so. And you fear the day he finally chooses to stop listening to you. 

“Team leader, I’m going to need much more convincing. Your team has been decreasing in productivity ever since your husband joined, and it’s hindering the company,” he reminds you stoically. “I’ve seen you working overtime far too frequently to cover up for your spouse’s negligence.”

You wish time would speed up just to get this difficult conversation with. “I—I’m going to be honest, Mr. Nanami. I don’t have much warrant to continue having him on the team, but it would put my family in much…emotional conflict if this were to happen.” The said emotional conflict would really only be from your husband. You’re sure he’s going to take this as an excuse to drink himself silly, blaming you for not being able to keep him employed. Your throat dries as you finally meet eyes with your boss, silently pleading him to come up with a solution.

“I see.” Nanami crosses his arms. “I suppose there is a…favor you could do for me.”

At that, you perk up and nod your head frantically. “Of course. Anything.”

Which is why you find yourself bent over Nanami’s desk, his cock drilling inside you. He’s ripped your stockings, pulled up your miniskirt, and put your panties to the side as he moans about how sweet your pussy feels. “I’ve been waiting for this forever. Tell me, is my cock better than his?”

“It is!” you squeal. “You’re so—so big!”

Nanami moans as he ruts inside you, your walls squeezing him tight. “Darling, I c—can tell he doesn’t treat you right. You are so tight around me, pussy’s been waiting for a while for a real man.” 

You moan and curse, blabbering affirmations while his dick impales you. Even though Nanami is the one who’s owed the favor here, his hands wind their way around your body to rub at your clit, simulating you even more, making you sob. “Please don’t stop!”

“I won’t ever, sweetheart,” he pants. “I’m going to finish inside her, okay? Make sure to keep it in when you go home and greet your husband.”

FUSHIGURO TOJI ⸺ BABE GETS IMMEDIATELY DESTROYED IN NAKED WRESTLING (WITH AN AUDIENCE) (find extended ver here!)

Cheers surround you as you step into the arena. You know who your opponent is—-Fushiguro Toji. Even when you looked at his pictures earlier, you knew you were doomed. No matter what angle the photographer took the photos in, his muscles seemed to be bulging, effectively spelling out the sore defeat you were about to face today.

And there he is. Him in the flesh. He’s leaning against the boxing ring’s outer borders, head tilted back lazily while his manager, Shiu, was informing him quickly (and intensely) about the rules of today.

Nothing crazy. Only fuck when all clothes are off of her.

The way his neck is tilted back, compression shirt showing off his upper physique made you weak in the knees already. Additionally, judging based off of the bulge he seemed to be sporting in his grey sweatpants, you knew you were doubly fucked.

Shiu seems to be done talking, so he steps back and takes a seat. Toji leans his head back, rolling his neck to stretch it out, and in the middle of doing so, catches your eye.

You almost drench your panties.

His eyes darken, giving you a sultry look as he cheekily winks. While his cocky demeanor was warranted (he was much stronger and bigger than you), your cheeks heated up in both arousal and irritation.

The sound of a whistle is heard as music starts to play. The stadium’s screens flashes the cocky image of Toji, who saunters in the middle of the ring, flexing his muscles to his screaming fans.

When your signature theme plays, you do the same, to no shortage of fans yourself. You can feel everyone in the stadium, especially your male fans, rove over your figure. You’re wearing a very low cut top that displays the swell of your boobs and even tighter shorts that squeeze your ass and show off the shape of your pussy. As you walk towards Toji, you can feel his heavy gaze on you as you nervously shake his hand.

“Try to last long, okay?” Toji smirks, patting your shoulder. “I’ll try to drag this out as much as I can, but it’s gonna be fuckin hard if that ass is grinding against me.”

You glare at him, but there’s not much intensity there. “Yea, yea,” you huff. “For all I know, you’ll be my personal dildo today.”

And the fucker’s smile widens. “Let the games begin.”

Soon enough, the sound of the whistle draws you towards each other, keeping each other in a lock to tackle the other down in an objective to take off layers of their clothing. Your fans cheer when you have Toji underneath you for a split second, only for female ones to become more riotous as he easily overtakes you, pins your hands down, and wrenches your shorts off of you.

“Toji is currently in the lead!” The announcer’s voice in the stadium echoes of your defeat as you flail around, now bottoms only covered by your panties. Deciding to pull out your signature move, you maneuver so your thighs surround Toji’s waist and hump your hips against his bulge. This momentarily distracts and weakens Toji, and you take full advantage of it by overtaking him and now straddling him. You quickly take off his shirt, salivating at the muscles you see. The whole stadium, in fact, can his abs and pecs glistening with sweat.

Your attention is back to Toji as he chuckles darkly. “You’re going to regret that. I was going to drag this out, princess, but I gotta fuck the brat out of you.” With that, he puts his whole body weight on you and strips you down one by one.

The arena cheers as your lace bra is uncovered, your sweat shining on the screen as your breasts are displayed. Toji then unhooks your bra, and the roars get even louder as your tits pop out. He takes a moment to grope them, your whines ignored as he pinches your nipples. “What a sensitive girl,” he coos. “Too bad she was too weak. Now she’s going through to have to take my cock.

With that, he finally unveils your glistening pussy for all eyes to see and the crowd goes wild, chanting for Toji to finish inside you. Toji flips you over so you’re on your hands and knees and pulls down his pants.

You don’t look back at the monster that’s about to enter you for the sake of your mental health, but your legs are shaking in anticipation of his cock, slick dripping down your thighs.

“Fuck.” And Toji’s slowly entering you, the humiliating plap! plap! plap! of his hips against the flesh of your ass echoing multiple strangers watch your pussy get wrecked. “The fuck this pussy’s so tight for? Thought you were a slut?”

You’re tearing up, but not fucked out enough to prevent you from snarkily replying, “You’re not turning me on, small dick.”

He did not like that very much.

Toji drills his hips into yours faster and slaps your ass multiple times consecutively. “Yea, so why is she clenching so fucking much? Why is she dripping? Just for that, I’m going to come inside of your slutty pussy.”

The crowd chants cum, cum, cum! and Toji just does that. Ropes of his cum fill you, and you drop down in exhaustion to hear Toji declared as winner.

GOJO SATORU ⸺ GIRL GETS FUCKED BY PEEPING TOM NEXT DOOR!

You sigh, extending your back and un clipping your bra, letting your tits bounce free after a long, long week of college. It was finally Friday night, and with no one in the house due to a party the rest of your family was attending, you could finally enjoy your time home on the holidays, starting with a solo session.

You clench your thighs in anticipation as you scrolled your phone, seeking an audio you could masturbate to. And you were close to finding one, until you felt eyes on you.

These eyes were nothing new. The boy next door, Gojo Satoru, has also been your crush since middle school. Even though neither of you have ever made a move, you’ve made bold moves since starting college, stripping with the blinds open to give him a show. You had kind of had a sixth sense as to when the fucker would start watching you, and it flared as you slowly dragged your hands down. Bending over and shaking your ass, you slipped your skimpy shorts down your legs, giving him a clear view of your wet pussy.

But masturbating wasn’t enough for today. None of the college frat bros could make you cum, no matter how much they boasted about their fuckin roster, and you were tired of Satoru just watching. Just seeing him work out shirtless in his lawn, sun shining his sweat to give him a golden halo, was enough to make you sick, hungry for his dick. The way he was so shy and the mannerisms he had (as a loser) let you know he had a big fucking dick.

Needless, to say, you were tired of just fantasizing and speculating about his dick. Turning around, the moonlight allowed you to see the silhouette of his wrist moving up and down his length, even if he had tried to make his best effort to darken his rooms. Putting on your best show of an angry face, you grab your phone aggressively and dial his number.

The line rings, and he picks up. “Hey,” and you can tell he’s a little breathless. “long time no see. What’s up?”

“Cut the fucking act out,” you spit. “I know you’ve been fucking watching me, perv.”

Satoru’s panic is comically obvious over the phone as he rushes his words. “Wait, wait—listen, I—I can explain.”

“On how you’re being a peeping tom?” You glare at his window. “Come over, Gojo. Then I’ll listen to your fucking explanation.”

One thing leads to another, and now you’re spread out on your childhood bed, Gojo whimpering and whining as he plows his dick into your pussy. “You feel so—so good. M’ sorry—sorry for doing that. Your pussy is too good for me to look at.”

You laugh meanly and grab his chin. “You feel sorry yet, you pervert?” And Satoru can only cry out as you yank his head. “Remember, this is the only fucking thing you’re good at. Being my glorified dildo. Got it? Now, you’re going to fill me up only after you make me cum at least two times.”

a/n yea this was depraved….lmk what yall think tho 😭

comment and reblog I’d love to hear your thoughts! (also, requests are open heheh)

NEW: part 2 here!

[fazcinatingblog]

Oh great, April 1st, when the footy humourists tell me Alex Fasolo has retired and I'm like WHAT NO HE CAN'T and then I realise what day it is and breathe a sigh of relief that Alex Fasolo still plays football and

[libraford]

It is possible to interact with people whom share opposing views and no this is not about pineapple on pizza. In fact, it is imperative that you learn how to be civil with some people who you may find difficult to agree with.

At work, Youngin would often tell me that the guy that trained him (Ginger) was a misogynist. I had never met Ginger, and I had very little to say on this matter. But I would ask Youngin some questions about him because I like to know the other seasonal workers a little. I ask about Ginger- first words from Youngin's mouth 'he's a misogynist.'

I asked him why he thought that. (There are many misogynists at this location, as someone that is woman-shaped I see it often, I am comparing notes.)

"We were on our way to a location and a driver was going really slowly. When he got around her he said 'fucking women drivers.' Like he was going out of his way to prove that the driver was a woman."

The last month or so, Youngin worked exclusively with me because I knew that it was a matter of time before he said something that pissed off one of the guys. He was not going to get along with people here, it just wasn't happening.

When he left, everyone wanted to know what he was like to work with. And I finally got to have a conversation with Ginger.

"I'd like to ask you something a little strange- he said that on his first day there was an issue with a driver going slowly. Can you tell me about that?"

"Oh yeah! She was going super slow and when I got around her I said 'yup- little old lady driving.' And he was like 'what's that supposed to mean?' And I just kind of dropped it, but I hear he was saying I was a misogynist over it?"

So I give Youngin some grace because he's young, he's got a social bubble that's very liberal, he has not met very many people that weren't part of that kind of scene. But he often talked about how every person here has said something that pissed him off and he seemed really surprised that I (woman-shaped queer liberal) would be okay working with all these sexist homophobes.

And I give grace to Ginger because he had no reason to think that his words would be interpreted like that. What he was saying was normal to him. This is... somewhat the culture of landscaping jobs. And its not even close to the worst thing I've heard out of these dudes mouths. (Literally had one of the dudes comment that he would like to 'motorboat' one of the pedestrians.)

It was weird for Youngin to carry that with him for the whole two months that he worked here, over a very... small comment.

Every single person I've worked with here has said something that has given me pause and I tuck it away to rant about later and then I let it go. If it gets out of hand, I talk to one of the bosses about it. I know how to contact HR. I came into this place knowing that I was going to disagree politically with most of the people that I work with because I'm coming in to a culture that is fundamentally different from my own.

If I am being frank, I find the overt bigotry somewhat better than the corporate bullshit of 'we value your contributions, but won't be granting your accommodations request out of fairness to other workers' or the glass cliff or literally being fired for my sexual orientation but phrased with 'oh you just weren't a good fit for the culture here.' I at least know what I'm getting into when I come to work. I know what not to talk about. Last time I thought I was safe to talk about something queer with my boss she blindsided me with some transphobic garbage.

Its admirable to stick up for the marginalized people in your life, but part of changing minds is knowing the time and the place to comment. I think I've changed more minds at this warehouse by being a visibly out lesbian at work than I have by making carefully crafted speeches.

That is fine. It is fine to disagree. Sometimes you have to work with racists, homophobes, and assholes. That is part of being an adult. You talk about things like... sports or TV or weather or some cool bug you saw. Finding common ground with people who are different from you in many ways is an important part of socialization and it sucks to think you have anything in common with a jackass but look- you're spending 7-ish hours with these people and at some point some of them are going to say stupid shit. You are going to say stupid shit also. I have said my fair share of stupid shit. Deal with the fact that you're all stupid shits.

And for fuck's sake, wear your hardhat.

[eddiesxangel]

1-800-HOT-TO-GO | E.M

Anonymous asked: Can i request a fic where either the reader reveals during a pizza and beers hangout she was a phone sex operator for a brief time and everyone is shocked and one of them jokingly asks if she was any good and she whispers something dirty in their ear and it changes their friendship

Cw: fem!reader, allusions to male masturbation, dirty talk 1.7k words

“Come again?”

“I used to work a sex hotline,” you shrug like it was no big deal.

“No way,” Eddie shakes his head. “I don’t believe you.”

You hear Steve and the others giggle around you, also in disbelief.

“Wanna bet?”

“Try me.” He wants to call your bluff because no way in hell did he not know this about you. You always were reserved when it came to talking about sex; you never had you seemed promiscuous.

You hold up your hand to your ear, pretending it is a phone, and Eddie follows your lead.

“Ring ring,” he giggles.

“Hello.” You changed the pitch of your voice to be more sultry.

“Hi,” he smirks.

“Can I get a name, handsome?”

“ Eddie”

“Mmmm, hi, Eddie. I’m Candy.”

“Candy?”

He breaks character, but you don’t.

“the boys say it’s because I’m so sweet.” You fake giggle.

“This is my first time calling. I’m not sure what to do here.”

“That’s okay, I’ll walk you through it… you want to get comfortable for me?”

Eddie looks around the room at the others, who are trying to stifle their giggles. This night was supposed to be chill, with pizza and beers. He wasn’t really sure how you all ended up here.

“I’m comfortable.” He says without actually moving.”

“I wish I could see; you sound so sexy.” You sigh.

Another giggle leaves Eddie’s lips because who is this person who’s taken over your body?

“Yeah? you wish you could see be, Dollface?” Playing into it more.

You lean in to whisper so only he can hear it this time. “oh yeah, big boy; I bet your cock is already nice and hard for me. Such a good boy, I want you to fill me.” You sit back, take a loose tendril, twirl his hair around your finger, and watch Eddie’s eyes widen at what you just said.

“Oh-okay, that’s enough.” He chuckles, trying not to give away how turned on he just got. “I believe you!”

You sit back with a giggle and grab another slice of pizza like nothing just happened.

Everyone looked at you with shock.

Eddie quickly gets up and excuses himself to go to the bathroom.

“What did you say?!” Robin begs.

You shrug in response like it was another day at work… which it has been.

“Damn, is it hot in here?” Steve pops the collar of his shirt.

“You guys need to loosen up, my god.”

While you were still enjoying your pizza, Eddie was having a crisis. Never had he thought of you in that way until moments ago, listening to those filthy words slip from your lips.

“I bet your cock is already nice and hard for me. Such a good boy, I want you to fill me,” your words replayed in his mind while he tried to fight the blood rushing to his stiffening cock.

He can’t go back out there like this. Eddie splashed cold water on his face to try to snap him out of it, but it didn’t help.

A quick rap on the door startles Eddie out of his inner monologue.

“You okay, big boy? You’ve been in there fifteen minutes.” He hears you laugh from the other side.

Had it really been that long?

Eddie’s issue had not been resolved; in fact, it had worsened as he tried to push down the thought of you naked and spread out for him… talking to him like that.

“Yeah-I-uh- just a minute.” Eddie wanted to pull his hair out at how frustrated you had made him.

You were just pals, bubbies, amigos.

You weren’t attractive… were you?

Eddie never thought to look at you in that way; you’re just a friend, always had been, always will be… unless?

The more Eddie thought about it, the more he realized he did think your hair looked really pretty tonight. The way you always did your makeup really brought out your beautiful features…and when he got a whiff of your delicious perfume when you twirled his hair, he thought his.

“You sure?” You try to jiggle the door handle, but it’s locked.

“Shit,” Eddie curses under with breath.

“Come on, Ed, talk to me, please?”

You hear the lock unlatch and watch the doorknob slowly turn as Eddie pokes his head out.

“Hi,” he’s short and sounds a bit out of breath.

“I hope what I said didn’t make you uncomfortable.”

Ed saw the worried look in your eyes.

“No! Well, I mean, yes, but…no.”

“Yes, but no?”

Eddie let out a deep sigh. He didn’t see a way out of this. He stepped aside to let you in and shut the door behind you.

“Eddie?” You look up at him.

“Hm?”

His eyes snap to your concerned face.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think it was a big deal! It did it all the time for work; I just… I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. clearly, I overstepped a boundary-“

“You’re not the only one.”

“What do you mean?”

Eddie moves his strategically placed hands to reveal the tent formed in his jeans and watches as your face falls into amused shock.

You cup your mouth to stifle an unexpected giggle.

“That’s not the reaction a guy wants when he shows a girl how turned on he is.”

“I’m sorry, I just!-didn’t think?”

“It’s okay. I’m just trying to get rid of it, but it’s not going away.”

“You mean?”

“I’m waiting it out.”

“Oh, ok.” You nod awkwardly.

An awkward silence washes over the both of you as you try so hard not to stare at his crotch.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to ask for your help if that’s what you’re thinking.”

“I wasn’t!”

“Ok…”

Another very uncomfortable silence settled between the two of you as you fiddled with the hem of your shirt, trying to do everything in your power so as not to look down.

“I um… I guess I’ll just.” You point to the door that he’s blocking.

“Uh. Ok,” he nods and steps to the side.

You close the door behind you but don’t leave. You lean against the door and take a deep breath, trying to make sense of the evening.

Why did the thought of turning Eddie on excite you? He’s a friend. Just a friend. I always had and always will be.

With a deep breath, you go to push yourself up off the door, but before you’re able to, you hear your name being moaned from the other side of the door.

You froze. You knew you should move, but your feet were locked in place. More heavy breaths and the sound of muffled moans seeped from under the door gap, and you pressed your ear to the door.

Eddie was jerking off because of you… and you liked it?

Eddie bit back screaming your name as he finally released himself into the bathroom tissue. Finally, he could return to rejoin everyone without being physically uncomfortable.

He discarded his release, tucked himself back in, washed his hands, and unlocked the door, but he was ambushed when you fell onto him when he went to open the door.

You let out a squeak as you lost your balance, falling into Eddie as the door was opened from under you.

“Woah,” Eddie catches you before you’re able to fall. His rage hands wrap around your biceps, gripping tightly to brace your fall.

“Were you spying on me?”

“Oh god, sorry” you’re so embarrassed. The whole evening has been one shit show. You scramble to find your fitting to create space between you and Eddie.

“You were spying on me!”

“Shhhhh! Keep your voice down.”

“You totally were spying on me!” He accused.

“You’re the one who moaned my name!” You defend.

Eddie’s cheeks reddened.

“You’re the one who said all those… things!” his hands flailed.

“You’re the one who egged it on!”

“So!”

“So?”

“Yeah, so!”

“Woah, guys, what’s going on here?” Steve pops his head around the corner.

“Nothing,” you both glare.

“Ohhhhhkayyyyyyyy,” Steve turns a heel and walks back to the kitchen to grab a drink.

“Eddie,” you sigh, “I don’t want to argue. This is dumb, and we can pretend it never happened.”

“We could, but I gotta know.”

“What’s that?”

“Did you like it?” He took a step closer, filling the gap between you.

“What?” You look up at him.

“I asked if you like listening to me?” he brushed your hair behind your shoulder.

You gulp, not expecting Eddie’s demeanour to switch on a dime.

“I… I don’t know?”

“I think you did, and you’re too scared to admit it.” You can smell him. He is so close to you.

“Eddie, what are you doing?” You watch as he leans in closer.

“Just trust me.” His hands find the back of your neck, pulling you close.

“Eddie?”

“Let me try something.”

“Kay,” you whisper.

Eddie’s lips graze yours ever so lightly before he presses them fully.

A million and one thoughts run through your mind as Eddie kisses you.

You blame the cheap beer for letting this happen. You blame the beer for liking it. You blame the beer for kissing him back. You blame the beer for the tongue slip and the beer for how you wanted to moan when he pulled away.

“Woah”

“Yea woah,” you repeated dumbly.

“um… did you like it?”

“Yeah… did you?”

“Yeah.”

“cool… now what?”

“go out with me,” Eddie states confidently.

“Like a date?”

“what else would it be?” He chuckles.

“I don’t know?” You shrug, embarrassed that Eddie is getting you all flustered.

“You’re cute when you don’t know what to say.” He smirks.

“I’m cute?” You never thought hearing Eddie say those words would send butterflies fluttering through your tummy.

Eddie doesn’t answer verbally; he leans in to kiss you again to confirm his statement.

“We should get back to the others.” You sigh as you pull away.

“You didn’t answer me.”

“You didn’t ask me anything.”

“Yes, I did. I asked you out.”

“No, you said go out with me. That’s a statement, not a question.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“No,” Yes, you were totally messing with him.

“Will you go out on a date with me?”

“Just say yes! You’ve been gone for half an hour!” You hear Robin yell from the living room.

“Robin!” You hear Steve scold.

“What?”

You can’t help but laugh and can’t believe the next world’s coming out of your mouth.

“Okay, I’ll go out with you, Eddie.”

[kiemiu]

voice notes your boyfriend matt leaves you | ( fem!reader ) fluff + soft hours. established relationship drabble wc 348 (library) + (request)

one. moms been asking about you a lot recently. i mean—seriously, every conversation we have she's always asking "how's your girlfriend doing? did she blah blah blah." and it's like, woah, ask me about my day first, yknow?

two. i think i've gotten too used to you sleeping in the same bed as me...it's weird without you here...empty. i hope you're getting better sleep than me.

three. don't be mad but...i—i took your teddy bear. i promise im gonna give it back when i leave boston, i swear! i just really miss you and i knew the perfume on my luggage wouldn't last....please, don't be mad.

four. i know i said i'd wait for you to send your order but i was in the drive-thru already and people were behind me. i—..i got nervous and drove off. (long silence) so— pizza tonight?

five. i'm glad you had a fun day shopping with the girls...do you think we could facetime when you get home? i wanna see everything you got.

six. (nicks voice) don't come in matt's room for like a good hour, he just blew ass and it smells so fu- (gagging noises) (matt in the background: it's not that bad, nick!)

seven. was playing dress to impress on stream earlier and couldn't stop thinking about you...if you're up to it we should play duos. but only if you're up for it, i know it's late.

eight. i'm never listening to your playlist on shuffle again, i was folding laundry listening to clairo and the next song queued up was some fucking death metal band. nearly gave me a heart-attack..

nine. hey, baby..you okay? i'm not trying to be like, clingy or whatever but we haven't talked all day and..i don't know it's just a little out of the ordinary. i'm sure you're fine but just—just let me know if you're okay, okay?

ten. don't you wanna grab your cool, hot, and sexy boyfriend a drink from downstairs? (whispers) please, say yes, please, say yes, please, say yes.

' 𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ' 🥡: @emely9274 @ginswife @madifilipowiczslvt @chrispleasure @chrisstvrns @conspiracy-ash @sturnina @lovetaylorrussellgrr @nervoussagittarius

[tojbnuy]

little halloween drabble!! 🎃 ps: toji is definitely the type of dad to cut into every piece of candy megumi got before letting him eat it. (likes reblogs always appreciated <3)

“right go on buddy go knock.”

toji watched as his son waddled towards the door ahead of him. he had to admit megumi looked really fucking cute. he had been going on and on about dressing up as mario for halloween so toji had done what any good dad would do and he bought him the full costume. the kid even had a fake mustache stuck to his upper lip.

“and remember to say please and thank you megs okay?”

“yes daddy i know.” megumi replied with a little too much sass in his tone.

his little fist knocked a couple times on the door until it opened and then there was. you. toji was a bit too focused on laughing at his sons costume that he hadn’t realised someone dressed up as bat-woman had opened the door. toji himself was dressed up as batman (if you could call keeping the batman mask atop his head dressing up). you were matching. and you were fucking gorgeous. toji was busy taking in your long bare legs when he heard the sudden screech leave you at the sight of his son.

“oh don’t you look adorable!!”

he was definitely gonna buy megumi some pizza on the way back after this.

“uh thank you. trick or treat?”

“hold on let me grab my bowl of candy.”

toji couldn’t help but stare at the rest of you as you turned your back on them. you returned with a massive pumpkin shaped bowl full to the brim with sweets and wrapped cakes.

“go on honey take as much as you like.”

and megumi did not take that sentence lightly. toji scoffed as his son grabbed as much as his chubby hands could carry and stuffed it into his bucket, all the while you grinned and cooed at the boy infront of you.

“does daddy want some?”

toji looked at you and the smirk on your face at your little question.

“nah i’m good thank you.”

just as megumi was about to turn back to his dad toji reminded him, “say thank you baby.”

“thank you baby.” megumi very confidently turned to you and said and you had all but melted. you were in a fit of giggles now as toji held a palm up to his face. megumi looked up at his dad wondering what the commotion was about.

“sorry about that.”

“no you’re good, that’s just made my night.”

you were just staring at each other now, neither of you wanting to break away without saying something more.

“hey we’re matching.” and there was something about your smile. he couldn’t get enough.

“yeah i realised.”

god what should he say. he didn’t want to just ask for your number he was clearly older than you.

“haven’t seen you around here before you new?”

“yeah i uh moved in last week.”

he watched every word come out of your pink painted lips. watched as you tucked a strand of black hair behind your ear.

“daddy why are you staring?”

that got another laugh out of you as you ruffled little megumis hair. there was a small hue of pink now dusting your cheeks however.

“nothing brat. well i’ll see you around then.”

“yeah hopefully.” and with one last smile and wave at megumi you closed your front door and toji was left standing there staring at your closed door and wondering if and when would be the next time he saw you.

“do you love her?”

“what??”

“you keep staring at her it’s weird.”

“i’ll be eating your candy when we get home.”

a/n : do we want a part 2 ? 🤨

[olailamajnoon]

Headcanon: Jason, after coming back from the dead, decides to fuck with Bruce for revenge and also because it slaps, but mostly for revenge ykwim

Bruce blames coffee and lack of sleep for the fact that the pizza delivery boy looks like Jason, the club bouncer looks like Jason, the clerk in Damian's school looks like Jason

Jason: here's your pizza, mister *shoves it into Bruce's face*

Bruce: 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 can I ask your name

Jason: Percy, but everyone just calls me Purse. Like in "cut purse"

Bruce: *under his breath* jesus, you even SOUND like him

Jason, wide innocent eyes popping out of his chiseled man face: you okay dude?

Bruce, convinced he's finally lost his mind, but still holding on to the "illusion": Do you want to come inside?

Jason, deadpan: dude you're rich white and famous, you really think imma let you take me inside your gargantuan Gothic mansion? Being killed one time's enough

Bruce, turning around: *wHaT dId YoU sAy*

[sttoru]

⠀ 𝝑𝑒 ⠀⠀ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. your boyfriend doesn’t like it when you eat unhealthy food while busy with uni work.

tags. older bf!gojo satoru x female reader. fluff. age gap (reader around early 20’s, satoru early 30’s). behavior may come off as ‘overprotective’ to some. nicknames ‘baby, sweetheart, princess’. not proofread

satoru’s at work while you’re in his kitchen, preparing a quick meal for yourself. you’ve been busy making and finishing assignments all day. you really could do with a break. though, a short one. there’s still lots more to do before you’re done with everything mandatory.

it’s convenient that satoru allows you to stay over at his apartment whenever you want to. he’s given you a spare key and told you that his home is also yours. if you need a break from your own place, you can always stop by his.

“ah, crap,” you hiss as the sauce packet nearly bursts open in your hand due to how roughly you pulled on its edges. you season your instant ramen noodles without much thought. it’s a quick meal that saves you time.

you’ve had it four days a row now—along with some pizza slices here and there. your boyfriend has been nice enough to send you money, telling you to treat yourself to some decent food while he’s away on business, but you’re really just too busy to treat yourself.

satoru’d be upset if he knew that you’re living off unhealthy crap again. the last time he caught you, he prepared you homemade meals or took you out to restaurants for weeks. he needs you to ingest your daily nutritions so you can stay healthy. you’re too important to him and he wants the best for you.

you grab your chopsticks and mix the sauce with the noodles, your spotify playlist running in the background. you walk to the fridge and grab a soda before sitting down at the kitchen table. unlocking your phone, you decide to see if anything’s going on on social media.

you’re too focused on your screen and the food entering your mouth to notice the front door opening. you catch a glimpse of a figure in the corner of your eye and your head flies up. a bit too late..

“ah, hi, satoru,” you mumble with a mouthful of ramen noodles. you’re caught off guard and you barely know what to do as the white-haired man puts his keys in his pockets. you put your phone down and discreetly try to cover your bowl, “didn’t know you’d come back so early.”

too bad you didn’t think of opening a window or throwing away the opened package of instant ramen. satoru looks over at the messy counter before walking towards you. he reaches a hand out to your cheek, brushing your thumb against your skin.

“hi, pretty,” satoru greets you with a gentle smile. he leans down and presses a kiss onto your lips, tongue stealing a taste of the sauce on your mouth. he pulls back and pinches the cheek he’s holding, “mind telling me what you’re eating, hm?”

you pout and swallow the bite of noodles you had in your mouth. you put your hands down, knowing there’s no hiding anything from your boyfriend. he dislikes the fact that you’re not taking your health seriously. “instant ramen. . .” you respond defeatedly.

satoru ruffles your hair with a shake of his head, silently disapproving of your actions. “i’ve given you money to get a proper meal, didn’t i, baby?” the older man explains in the same tender tone. he doesn’t have the heart to be mad at you. he crouches down next to the chair you’re sitting on and kisses your knuckles, each getting a peck.

“yeah, ‘m sorry,” you nod, knowing your lover did his part of taking care of you. he gave you money to spend on food or ingredients, but you still chose the easy way out. it’s not like you’ve been craving noodles—you’re eating them for the sole reason being that they’re fast and easy to make. you’re too busy (and lazy) to go out and buy stuff.

satoru chuckles, not really mad at you at all. he’s simply worried for your wellbeing. he sees how hard you work for uni while also making time to spend with him, no matter how little it may be. “it’s okay, it’s okay,” satoru coos and kisses your forehead before getting up.

the sorcerer looks down at the bowl of noodles before glancing back at you. “do you want to finish it or do you want me to make you something?” he asks whilst playing with the little hairs around your face. you’re beautiful, somehow even more gorgeous with those dark circles under your eyes.

you pout and think about his question. you’re tired of eating the same thing four times in a row and you know how good satoru’s cooking can be, so. . .

“can you make me something?” you ask carefully in a quiet tone, flashing your boyfriend your best puppy eyes, “pretty please?”

satoru grins and nods immediately. he’s always happy to help you out when you need it. “of course. anything for my princess,” he coos and squeezes your cheeks one last time. he’s got an obsession with the way you scrunch your nose up every time he does so.

he grabs the bowl of noodles and puts it away after making sure you didn’t want any more of it. sure, he wants the best for you, but he doesn’t want to be too restrictive. in case you still want to steal a bit, satoru puts the bowl in the corner of the counter.

you walk to satoru as he stands near the fridge. you rub your weary eyes and watch as he grabs the needed items to make your favorite comfort meal. he catches you staring at him and he smirks lovingly.

“oh my, i have such an adorable girlfriend,” the older man holds himself back from squeezing your cheeks together again. he holds your wrist and pulls you flush against him, his head leaning down to match your eye level.

satoru plants a quick kiss on your lips. his hand finds it way on your hips before slithering upwards. he pats your back, gently comforting and encouraging you, his other hand doing the same on the back of your head. he knows how hard it is for you these days, with the busy end of the semester and all.

“love you, ‘toru, thank you,” you smile at him and nuzzle your face into his chest. you really needed a distraction from all the hard work you still have to do. a quick break with the person you cherish most will gain you back all the energy you’ve lost.

satoru hugs you even tighter to him when you utter those magical words. if he could, he’d take care of you every single second of the day. he’d do anything to make you feel better. he places a peck to your forehead, “i love you too, sweetheart. but promise me one thing; please take better care of yourself, ‘kay?”

[cutieln4]

Kiss and Makeup | LN4 smau

lando norris x reader

summary: you are lando norris's makeup artist

fc: isabela merced

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caption: my face after waking up at 4 am to do ppl’s makeup

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yourbsf you’re GLOWING babe

mclaren check DMs!

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caption: New stuff coming soon🤭

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user1 oh wow he's so handsome

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mclaren Some new bags have been released with our partnership with Tumi, check them out below!

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yourusername it was nice doing something else! thanks for having me! @/mclaren

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yourbsf remember me when you're famous😔

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landonorris gearing up for the next race

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yourbsf body is tea tho

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GQ Racing, gaming, and padel, hear all about Lando Norris in his interview here

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user1 WOWZA

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user1 IM SO JEALOUS

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landonorris that's more like it

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user1 LANDO NORRIS 2X GRAND PRIX WINNER

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tumitravel Lando Norris for TUMI

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user1 where ya going?🙂

yourbsf gonna miss u when ur in singapore :(

user2 y'all so cute idec if you're dating or not

landonorris

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landonorris sing a pore

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user1 bruh

user2 hard launch on live tv goes crazy

user3 bro's just gonna ignore that EVERYONE saw that kiss

yourusername you can't keep a secret to save your life

landonorris oops🤭

yourusername you're lucky ur cute

user4 CONFIRMATION YES

user5 WAR IS OVER

user6 I WAS HERE

user7 okay but that was so fricking cute

yourusername

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yourusername muppet🙄

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user1 HELP

landonorris i said i was sorry pls

landonorris sorry again😁😁😁

landonorris where did you get these photos

user2 nahh that's crazy

user3 okay now i'm definitely jealous

user4 this is literally a wattpad story like wdym she's his makeup artist and now they're dating???

yourbsf i'd like to thank beyoncé

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[97kuu]

Out of gas?

Summary; It was a setup between Taejoon and Jungkook to get him to hook up with you in the car. However, his guilty heart and physical desire revealed that he wanted more than what he was willing to confess that night..

Au; jungkookbestfriend! Friends to lovers!

Paring: Jungkook x reader!

WC; under 3k

Warnings; Smut, accidental f^ndling , random jump scare, car s^x, doggy, exhibitionism, voyeurism, dirty talk, light f^ngering, Almost caught, slight teasing, o^al (m), no condoms, creampies, Jungkook being thirsty, needy!jungkook, older Jungkook, acidental gr^^ping, passionate s^x, etc..

“Jungkook, it’s midnight..’ you whispered, eyes flicking to the time on his phone before scanning the view outside. The dark, foggy night pressed against the car windows, and a drizzle pattered on the glass. You both had been voted—unanimously, of course—to head out and grab pizza and snacks for the group. But now, here you were, driving slowly down the narrow forest road that connected the rented house to the nearest small-town market, headlights cutting through the thick fog as the car crept along.

“Should we call and say it’ll be an hour-” he paused, eyes squinting as he saw the smallest bit of light around the corner.

“Aha, so we’re near it. I recognized the light when we first came. Which means we’re about-“Jungkook pauses and out of nowhere a sudden movement burst from the left—a blur of fur and wide, the image of a deer’s silhouette flashed in the headlights.

Jungkook’s reaction was instant, a sharp intake of breath as his foot slammed the brake, tires screeching against the slick, uneven surface of the old road. The car lurched violently, wheels slipping as it swerved, fighting for traction on the rain-slicked asphalt.

In that split second, Jungkook’s arm shot out instinctively, pressing across your chest to brace you, a protective reflex as your bodies jolted forward. The vehicle shuddered, threatening to spin out, while the pounding rain roared louder, drowning out the racing hearts from the sudden but almost dangerous act.

“what? What?” You questioned, already on edge from there being little to no road light already. With his hand on your chest you realized wearing a bra would’ve been a bit better of a decision, if you knew a dear would just jump out like that.

Due to that, you could notice your nipples harden from the touch of his inked right forearm by hand. Embraced you looked away and hoped he didn't feel it, but deep down inside you both knew he did.

“A dear just jumped in front of us, that could've ended badly. I almost swerved us, you, into a tree.” He sighed, knowing his focus was off a bit.

Removing his foot on the gas, he felt for the window button and pushed down about an inch to get fresh air. The silence between the both of you was heavy, punctuated only by the rhythmic thud of rain and the soft hum of the engine as he recollected himself, only now remembering to remove his arm from your chest.

Hesitant, you look back at him and see from the little light offered from the headlights he was a bit distressed, and come to think of it since you both left he’s been a bit stressed and yet you couldn’t ask why. Yeah, the both of you are close and have a history but even now you couldn’t ask ‘Are you okay’ So with the silence between words you also relaxed with the windshield wipers filling the void.

“I’m sorry,” he uttered quietly, eyes not locking in with yours. “are you okay? You didn't hit your head on anything?” he questioned softly as he rolled the window up a bit.

“No, no I'm okay, your arm prevented that. So thanks” you reassured him, pushing on the light button between the both of you on the car's control panel.

You made sure to turn the back seat lights on and not the front to not flash the both of you. In doing so, Jungkook watched and crossed his legs a little bit more in fear of slander and disapproval. Then again it wasn’t like he didn’t want you to at least look at him hardening, it was a setup after all, all thanks to the member's naughty ideas.

It started when Jungkook was leaving after a vote of who would go, he was simply standing by the door of the rented place, shifted on his feet, while the teasing glances from Taehyung and Namjoon made it difficult to keep a straight face. The faint light above them illuminated the playful smirks tugging at their mouths, the rain-soaked night casting a shadowed veil over everything beyond. You were already inside the car, oblivious to the exchange happening outside between them three.

Namjoon leaned in closer, lowering his voice so only Jungkook could hear. “This is your moment. Don’t waste it.” His eyes sparkled with mischief, a knowing look that made Jungkook’s stomach twist in anticipation. Taehyung, arms folded casually, added with a cheeky grin, “There’s only half a mile of fuel, so if you want to fuck, that’s your best chance.”The bluntness of the remark sent a jolt through Jungkook, heat spreading across his face despite the cool mist of rain.

A crooked smirk broke across Jungkook’s lips, an attempt to mask the rush of desire that thrummed through him. “You two are unbelievable,”he muttered, his voice low but tinged with excitement. Namjoon gave a soft chuckle, stepping back with a pat on Jungkook’s shoulder, while Taehyung shot him one last suggestive glance before they both disappeared back inside.

Jungkook took a breath, trying to steady his racing pulse before turning and making his way to the car. He slipped inside, shutting the door with a quiet click. The soft patter of rain enveloped the space as he glanced over at you, eyes darkening with intent as anticipation crackled like electricity between you.

From then on all he could think about was how good you’d look as the moon covered your body. The way he would thrust upon you or your chest bouncing while he drove or the subtle suction from your lips on his tip as he drove. Just clouded with naughty imagery that worsened when he touched your chest, a movement that prevented you from any minor injuries or bruises he should be doing and not the car.

However the squish of your uncovered breast on him made him freeze, made him feel cray to think maybe you did want him. All because you typically never go out without one, your breasts are free and relaxed, and… he was trailing off mentally at the thought of wanting you until he released you were staring at his cock and he was drooling at the thought of your breast.

Jungkook could feel the weight of your gaze on him, a look that lingered longer than usual. His pulse quickened, and despite his best efforts to focus on the quiet hum of the night, his mind kept drifting to the way your eyes moved over him—slow, wondering, and curious.

There was something in the way you looked at him—something that pulled at him, making it harder to pretend everything was fine when his heart was pounding, his body betraying him. He knew that it was obvious and that connections could be made and he’d swear it was innocently done and not intentionally for his pleasure.

Not daring to speak he shifted again, knowing there was an awkward silence. The awkwardness hung for minutes at a time, but Jungkook couldn’t ignore the growing pressure inside him. Despite the discomfort, despite the way his nerves seemed to freeze him in place, his body still managed to betray him. Every subtle shift in his posture, every lingering glance from you, only intensified the craving he couldn’t shake. He tried to keep his mind focused, he tried to push the thoughts away, but it was just impossible.

There was something about the way you stood there under the car’s dim light, the silence between you both stretching just a little too long, that stirred something deep within him. It was awkward—undeniably so—but his body had its rhythm, its desires, and right now, they were begging to be satisfied. He shifted again, trying to will the discomfort away, but the tension only seemed to grow, and it became clear that no matter how hard he tried to ignore it, the need for something more was undeniable.

“There’s no denying what you see, but it’s killing me. I can’t ignore it anymore. You’ve got me worked up, and I don’t know how much longer I can pretend that it’s not there.” His body was wired, every nerve alive with need, desperate for release. The ache inside him only grew stronger, a constant reminder that he was on the edge, craving the relief that only a touch could bring. His mind raced, and yet, nothing seemed to ease the pressure building within him. The frustration clawed at him, knowing that it was impossible to ignore, and the only thing that could silence the throbbing tension was the very person in front of him, you.

With a slide of your hand towards his inner thigh, he bit down on his lower lip in anticipation as the throb and lift of his cock spoke louder and clear than he could.

With a slight chuckle to yourself, you placed your thumb on the outlining of his sweatpants and rubbed the pleading tip in circles. He couldn’t focus on anything the moment you placed your thumb in him and with the light movement on his tip, he was truly feeling his heart drop to his tip in need.

Jungkook was holding back thoughts of pulling his cock out and placing your slightly smaller hands around, to truly get a good feel of how you made him fall in a quick desperation of need. He was holding it all back, taking one circle around the tip at a time as if being entranced.

Not asking to stop he shifted in his seat, unconsciously widening his legs, allowing more space between his thighs. The motion was deliberate, almost instinctual, as if his body was craving more room, more freedom. The fabric of his pants stretched slightly with the movement, the tension of the moment becoming more evident as his posture opened up. He wasn’t just making space physically; it was as though he was inviting something, shifting his stance to make himself more accessible, more vulnerable in that quiet, charged atmosphere.

Grabbing the hem of both his sweats and boxers he pulled them down to his knees exposing his aching, twitching, drooling member that throbbed for you in every way. He was vulnerable, he needed to show he was serious and stand firmly on the idea of you touching more of him. Even if it was with bold actions or words.

“Oh you’ll my cock, want it even,” he said, his voice low and commanding. “If not, you’ll love the feeling.” he continued, his attitude shifted. The change was almost immediately, when your hands wrapped around him, without asking, without hesitation. The action made his breath hitch, a smug smirk spreading across his face as he leaned back, knowing now that there was no turning back.

With a lick of your bottom lips, knowing that if there was any chance of this happening again it was zero and you wanted it as much as he did. You wanted his touch, his need his cock. Maybe it was a good idea to be braless, if you were truly disgusted or afraid why was your tongue now lapping in circles around his tip? Why were slight moans threatening their way out while you embraced him in your mouth? All the while your panties began to feel damp, slightly sticky from your ongoing aroused state.

Jungkook was average length, but thicker in circumference and curved a bit to the left. His tip is wider than the base. He was a good size, maybe a great size from just looks which made your teeth sink themselves into your bottom lip with desire. A desire, a desire to be filled up and fucked against the leather seats in his car. Oh, how the way he slowly drove you insane quickly should be studied.

The more you thought about how Devine his cock would be, your body became needy as if being free of restraints that you never knew you had with him until you began bobbing your head and using your dominant hand to fondle his cock. Even jungkook was surprised by how willingly you took him, how much focus you put on sucking his cock with utter grip while he put the car in park.

Groaning his heart was eased by the mutual feeling of lust, but curious about how far you’d both go. Lifting your head off his cock, he leaned down a bit to embrace you a lighthearted kiss, your mind not even having to think as you kissed toughly back in response.

Oh, you both loved it, bodies heating up and coming closer second by second as if being pulled by a now-known shared moment of hunger and urgency as you both pulled each other closer. The kiss was frantic, and deep, as if you were both trying to take in every inch of each other, the world around you fading away.

Your hands moved instinctively, tugging at his shirt, pulling it off with a sense of urgency, your breath mingling in the brief seconds you parted to take in air. His lips found their way back to yours in those fleeting moments, your bodies pressing against each other as if you couldn’t get close enough. The rhythm of your kiss grew more intense, matching the pounding aching desire between your thighs.

Pulling away, leaving you speechless he helped you take your shirt off and pull down your bottoms throwing it in the back seats with his own before lowering your seat’s back down and making his way across the car's middle section to be between you and your aching cunt.

“I have no condoms” he mentioned, helping you in a tight space to get on your knees, to then help press your chest on the passenger seat. Essentially kneeling doggy in a space limited of room.

“Pretend you do when you cum inside me” you teased, his hand swatting your ass causing a hiss of pain.

“Sure will” he teased back, hands gripping your waist as he began to grind his bare erected cock between your lips, coating the top with wetness as if asking slightly if he could go in. Without a verbal response, he could tell you agreed from the way you arched your back and pushed against him with need. And oh did that send him to the heavens and back in a movement.

“Fuck!” Jungkook, under his harsh breath cursed. Body enjoying the wetness of your pussy sliding on it.

Shortly after a few grunts and hard slaps on your ass, he teased the tip of his member around your entrance. Leaning over your back a bit, he stabilized his left hand on the side of your body before going to strum his thumb on your clit. With light circular motions on your bundle of nerves, his tip was merely sitting just around your entrance.

“There's more in store baby,” he whispered low, yet still audible to your ears. Right after saying that his motions stopped as he smooched your back and sat on his knees as much as he could in the shared passenger seat. Lining up, he slowly pressed himself in to see how he’d fit and if he’d be able to thrust himself in with no problem. With a deep groan, he thrusted himself in further feeling the tightness mixed with the warmth of your insides that felt nice and snug around him.

He felt good, he was excited and desperate to be inside. The small thrusts of his tip, soon turned into slow strokes that went from tip to base filling you up every time, feeling that stretch as your warm wet liquid dribbled around his aching cock. Resuming he placed both of his warm hands on your waist, his grip becoming tight, warm, and firm against your colder skin as he held you closer to his pelvis.

Picking up the pace, he could start to hear your moans muffled into the chair and he wanted more. He desired to fuck himself against your wet cunt with passion, need, and raging desire as an insatiable heat coursed through him. One driven by the singular desire to make you unravel beneath his touch

He felt like every fiber of his being pulsed with a need that was more than just want—it was a raw, consuming hunger to feel you respond, to watch your body react under his command. His heart pounded with anticipation, each thrust of his cock fueling the fire that pushed him to take control and make you surrender to the pleasure he craved to give.

Oh, he wanted it badly, he wanted you to surrender to the touch, to the thought of the very feeling of his cock buried deep inside of

your gripping, creaming pussy. Which was something he took great pride in getting even if it meant showcasing a shy, hungered, and needy side of him. You were his weakness, you were his desire and necessity and there was no going back after this. After years of a good friendship, this was going to change it and more for both of you with no thoughts against it from either of you and he was satisfied with that in mind.

“You’re mine now,” he growled, breath ragged as he pressed closer, each word laced with a rough, possessive tone. “And after tonight—” a low grunt escaped him, “there’s no going back. Not when you know how this feels.”

Your breath hitched, a shiver coursing down her spine as she met his intense gaze. “Then don’t stop,” you whispered, voice trembling with anticipation. “Show me why I’ll never want to.’”

A controlled, deep warmth spread through him, fueling a commanding need that made his jaw tighten and his breath deepen. His pace slowed but became striking as he pounded harder. The feeling coursed through him like a slow burn, power, and pleasure entwined as he let out a low, pleased groan, curses flowed out like an ongoing river as he pounded and relished the hold he had on the moment.

“Come on, let go for me,” he urged, voice deep and rough with need. “I need to see you fall apart. I need to hear every sound.” His moans were loud and filled with need as he built up to his edge, slowly holding on to his orgasmic finish so that he could cum with you.

“I’m right here,” he murmured, voice low and commanding. “Let go for me. Indulge, and you’ll see how good it feels.” His eyes locked on yours, full of intensity, as his touch guided you closer. “Cum for me,” he urged, the need in his tone impossible to ignore, “show me everything.”

As his voice reached you, rough and commanding, it sent a shockwave through your body. The tension inside you snapped, and a powerful release took over, making you cry out as the sensation overwhelmed you. The intensity was enough to make your body tremble uncontrollably, and a sudden rush of wetness followed, leaving you breathless and shuddering as you surrendered to the peak he had driven you to.

He felt the tight coil in his core snap, a deep, guttural moan escaping as the rush overtook him. His body shuddered, muscles tensing, every nerve on fire as the wave of pleasure surged through him, overwhelming and unstoppable.

Each pulse left him breathless, eyes squeezed shut as he surrendered to the intensity of the moment. His voice dropped to a commanding tone as he thrust harder, “Cum baby, cum on my cock now! I want you to cum babygirl.”

The force of his thrusts pushed them both over the edge, and he felt her release, her body trembling beneath him as he rode out his own, his breaths ragged and deep. He continued thrusting, each movement a desperate need to finish and he was close. He was there and once that loud cry of “Jungkook” slipped your lips, he was gone.

His body trembled as the pressure built within him, each movement intensifying the feeling. The edge was near, and his breath came in shallow bursts, his grip tightening as he felt the overwhelming rush rising from deep inside. With one final push, the wave of pleasure crashed over him, his body shuddering as he released, a guttural sound escaping his lips lost in the sheer intensity of the moment. He was done, his body spent and trembling, feeling the warmth of her against him.

He was panting, he was sweaty, and hovered over your nude body in weakness almost wanting to crash into you. But no, he pulled out watching his fluid follow out behind him with a smirk. Shaking the last of his cum onto your legs, he shortly gained the strength to scoot back over to the driver's seat and lay back in it with a huge sigh of release.

Meanwhile, you plopped yourself on the chair ass faced out, and sat there in silence as you regained your consciousness and energy to move, coming down from your high as his seed dripped out and slid down your thighs. He was right, there was no next after him and you wanted that as much as he did. You were ready for whatever came next, that's something you didn't have to have sex again to decide. You did have feelings for him in the past and now, so why not go for it?

With that in thought you felt a cold wet press against your legs only for him to reassure its a wet wipe just to clean a bit before heading to get food and back where the both of you would shower soon. Well until he sat down and the blinking light of the gas along with the tank on zero.

“Shit we're out of gas,” he groaned in frustration, hitting his head on the window.

“Well, I guess we call for backup once we’re dressed. Speaking of do you think anyone you know saw us?” you questioned, voice weak and shaken up, mind still out of it as you handed them his clothes and grabbed your own.

“No, this road only leads towards the house. If it was anyone it’d be” Turning to the side he sees a car light in the distance and hears a honk. With quickness, you turn off the light and both of you jumble to put your clothes on as the car slowly drives closer.

“Run out of gas?” Tae hollers, out the window, as he pulls up. Rolling his windows down, jungkook yells back “Yeah” and then whispers to you “There’s a convenience store, take my wallet and we’ll split up so you can buy what you may need because-” he cut himself, shy but what he was gonna say next. Giggling you nodded and fixed your clothing as he got out to help Tae fill the gass up to full before continuing for what was tasked. Pizza, drinks and other things.

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