#of course RIGHT after I started writing this up someone asked for m:tg analysis

[heresmyhyperfixations]

Let me be so for real for a minute. I grew up in a homophobic and transphobic household. Now, there’s a lot I could speak on in relation to this time of my life and how even now it’s affects me. But instead I want to share something pertaining to the fandom I have found myself in recently.

Good Omens was on my list of shows to watch since it came out all those years ago. Honestly, I was a Supernatural fan, I yearned for nothing more then a good on screen queer angle lol. Of course I couldn’t not at home. I couldn’t risk it. It was funny, some family members were Michael Sheen fans. That meant watching a lot of things he was in and every time I would be thinking about Good Omens and how much I wanted to be able to see it. But after a while I did kind of forget that it exists. Then I stumbled back onto this lovely little chaotic app. Following a lot of writing based accounts and tags it didn’t take long to come across Neil Gaiman’s account, even though he doesn’t use social media. Seeing him answer asks about GO made me go “Oh! Finally!” And start streaming it immediately.

Of course I fell in love. Growing up being shamed by my family for simply being a little “strange”, plot twist I am just neurodivergent, hurt a little less watching Aziraphale constantly being ridiculed by the other angles for his human tastes. Cause if he is still a good character/person/angel, even if a little “weird”, that means I can be good too. Watching Crowley get cast away for asking questions was relatable as well. But guess what? If he can go off and make a life for himself with his love and independence then so can I. Does this mean Aziraphale and Crowley don’t have a ton of healing and growth still to do? Absolutely not. But I am sure they will get through it, and so will I.

Now here’s where it gets a little tricky, figuring out how to express how much the fandom means to me. Hearing other stories, headcannons, and character analysis makes me feel less alone for starters. But even on a less dramatic note, it just so nice to be able to revel in our mural love for this show! After all these years of wanting to watch I finally get to join in on the fun! And I am so so so grateful for that. I love it here.

P.s. as someone still coming to terms with my gender identity, seeing David be so vocal about his support of trans rights and wearing his little non-binary pride pin has made me feel so much better.

[the-way-astray]

what is going on

let me take you back to half a week ago, when this first started.

it all starts with a simple notification. i click on it, thinking it's an innocent ask, or perhaps an anon wanting to pick a fight with me. i am a notorious keefe hater in this fandom, after all. let's see what the anons have to throw at me this time. if only that small, innocent, little me from four days ago had known. the notification was nothing short of a snake, hiding in the grass, waiting to strike.

it was alayda. she'd dared me to write something *horrified gasp* positive about keefe. she thought me, a notorious keefe hater, couldn't possibly have anything nice to say about my least favorite guy? well, i'd show her. i typed out a truly magnificent pro keefe essay, if i do say so myself. tumblr fought me the entire time, trying to delete half of it, but i persevered, and eventually posted it.

i had no idea what was coming for me. over the next few hours, i began to get truly heinous asks, questioning my commitment to my keefe hatred, and generally slandering my reputation. at the time, i'd thought this was as bad as it could get. but, oh. oh, no, no, no. as edaline ruewen said, "hindsight is a dangerous game". now i know that it could get worse than i could possibly even begin to imagine. and it did.

that same day, i got the ask. the one that changed everything. i responded in horrified horror, terrified terror, because i knew everything was about to change. and the next day, it appeared that other anons had followed in the first anon's footsteps. it was decided that me and keefe would be an enemies-to-lovers romance. our ship name was to be strieefe. an anon went to the official poll blog, @/do-you-ship-this-book-couple. i changed my ask box title to "KEEFE WOULD NOT LIKE ME" and got an anon about it. they started going to katie's ask box.

the debate ramped up. more people became aware. people, both anon and not, began to choose sides. i began offering badly drawn sketches to people who sided against this atrocious excuse for a ship. i should probably be making those instead of typing this out. whoopsie. i fought the anons that disagreed with me with a desperation akin to a rat caught in a trap, but my thrashing appeared to only attract more unhinged anons.

i then got my first anon that made a genuine attempt to explain why this horrible ship could theoretically work. they were wrong, of course, but i appreciate the effort. as i've explained countless times, the real relationship me and keefe would have if he were real would be one-sided hatred. i would hate him with a passion that can't be adequately described by the english language, and he'd be entirely unaware of my existence.

then! a miracle! an anon sent an ask to quil about strieefe, and i can only assume they wanted quil to analyze why we'd be good together. but quil, i never should've doubted quil. the response was a fantastically constructed analysis on why i was right about how i'd have one-sided rage toward keefe. but my delight dimmed significantly when i saw that fin, someone whom i'd previously trusted, had thrown his support behind this awful ship and even drawn fanart of me and keefe. i swiftly demoted him from the spot he had previously shared with max: "favorite fintanposter".

the anons got more unhinged. i began to be shipped with non-keefe main cast characters, sometimes monogamously, sometimes not. i bravely faced the assault, tearing the anons' arguments to shreds with my logical explanations as to why i would not be a good fit for any of them. this led to me posting a poll at the insistence of one anon, which is still open.

just as the waters were looking significantly less treacherous, just as it seemed i may make it to shore without drowning, a new development occurred. i got an ask from alayda, who as you may remember, is the one that started all this. this is entirely her fault. i'd expected maybe a heartfelt apology, perhaps a plea for forgiveness. but no. her ask was but an ominous warning, one i could not make sense of. i pondered the meaning as i stared at it. and then. horror upon horrors, it appeared in my inbox. i read through it in horrified horror, and my rickety little boat was once more swept out to sea.

it was a fanfic. a terribly written, horribly wattpad-ified, y/n-ish fanfic. i tore it to shreds thoroughly, taking pleasure as the scraps of the work of the one who had brought all this sorrow upon me fell in loose tatters all around me. i dusted off my hands and left it at that.

but it continued. even as i type this out, there is a part two to that horrific fanfic sitting in my inbox, which alayda is pestering me to post. there's also a part one to another anon fanfic, which is written relatively well, which arguably makes it even worse than alayda's. then there's yet another poem written about me and keefe by emelin, which also sits in my inbox, gathering dust as i attempt to piece the broken shards of my sanity back together.

all this to say, join the correct side of this debate. we have badly drawn sketches and braincells. be on the right side of history.

[mysteryshoptls]

SSR Ortho Shroud - Bloom Birthday Vignette

"Happy Birthday"

[Ignihyde Dorm – Birthday Party Venue]

Ortho: It's like a dream come true to get interviewed for my birthday as a student here at Night Raven College.

Ortho: And on top of that, thanks to my big brother, I was able to retrofit my gear to look just like everyone else's outfits… I'm super happy.

Ortho: Oh yeah, I should make sure to capture all this on film. I wanna show this to my brother… Oh, and my dad and mom.

???: Film? …I suppose I'll have to ask later. Pardon me.

Sebek: Happy Birthday, Ortho. It seems I have been tasked with being your presenter today.

Ortho: Woah, hey! Sebek Zigvolt-san! Thank you. I look forward to it.

Sebek: Right… You mentioned just a moment ago that you would be capturing this on film. Essentially, does that mean you intend on recording my words and actions?

Ortho: Yep. And if you make any mistakes, maybe Malleus-san will end up seeing alll your embarrassing moments. You better do good.

Sebek: Humph, as if I would disgrace myself before someone like you. I shall read out the first question now.

Sebek: “Are you good or bad at flying?”

Ortho: Hmmm, that's a toughie. I mean, especially since I'm a humanoid…

Ortho: I can't just cast magic on a broom and fly like you or the other mages here.

Sebek: Hm? You mean to tell me that you do not usually use magic to float in the air?

Ortho: Yeah. It's more like technomantic energy… Maybe it'd be easier to say it's a hybrid of electricity and magic.

Ortho: By swapping out my gear or any attachments, I can increase my speed, or even fly for longer periods of time.

Ortho: For me, as long as I have technomantic energy, I can fly wherever I want…

Ortho: I can even fly no problem through difficult obstacle courses, or fly at a constant speed.

Ortho: That's why for a little while after I became a student at Night Raven College, I made sure to observe the flight and P.E. classes.

Ortho: Unlike you guys, it's not like I would gain any stamina or strength through training, after all.

Sebek: You were observing us? I suppose I do recall seeing you flying with some of the students last week or so.

Ortho: Oh, so you saw me. Actually, I recently started helping out by supporting Vargas-sensei during his classes.

Sebek: You're supporting…? As in, as his assistant?

Ortho: Yep. During flight classes, I fly along my classmate's brooms and capture data on their form and time.

Ortho: Using that data, I'm able to identify everyone's habits and weaknesses and provide suggestions for improvement.

Sebek: Hm… That would indeed be helpful to be able to get an objective analysis of my flying posture.

Ortho: Right? And Vargas-sensei praised me too, saying, "When you're around, the students' muscles gleam even brighter"!

[Ignihyde Dorm – Birthday Party Venue]

Sebek: Next question is…

Sebek: “What is something that made you glad you could use magic?”

Ortho: Eehh, that's another tough one.

Ortho: I might have been able to develop a soul that can use imagination like you guys, but it's not like I can actually use magic…

Ortho: Because all of my functions are based on technomantic energy…

Ortho: But if I were to answer as a student of a mage institute should… IT'D HAVE TO BE THAT I'VE MADE FRIENDS HERE!!

Sebek: You're a student of the most prestigious Night Raven College, and your answer is to speak of the friendships you've developed?

Ortho: Yep. Because I came here originally as one of my brother's "gadgets," I was able to meet a ton of living people…

Ortho: And now that I've started taking classes as a student, I've had the opportunity to come in contact with so many more people.

Ortho: I had a ton of fun with the groupwork we had the other day. You know, the one where we had to study up on some of the legends of the Great Seven.

Ortho: You did that in your class too, right?

Sebek: Indeed. I found writing a report in a group of 4 to be a rather impractical assignment.

Ortho: Oooh, so you don't find group work to be practical, huh. Interesting.

Sebek: From the way you speak, it seems to me like you look upon that sort of assignment favorably.

Ortho: Yep. Whenever I listen to other people's opinions, even if we're reading the same story, everyone has a different interpretation, so I find that super fascinating.

Sebek: Interpretation?

Ortho: I guess I could also say that everyone values different things.

Ortho: And then I realized that the thought that everyone puts the most value in is strongly connected to their past experiences… their "memories," so to speak.

Ortho: For example, if you were born and raised in Briar Valley, you would've probably heard so many anecdotes of the Thorn Fairy from a young age.

Ortho: That's why there would be more passion, more zeal in the discussion about her.

Ortho: And some may believe that their idealized versions are more correct than a proper database.

Sebek: Idealized, you say? The Thorn Fairy is absolutely a great being. No amount of praise would ever be considered to be too much.

Ortho: If you're that adamant, then we should have a discussion about it sometime.

Ortho: During class the other day, I sourced documents from my database and soundly destroyed all the inconsistencies in their arguments…

Ortho: So I wonder just how far you'll be able to keep up with me, Sebek-san.

Sebek: Don't you put me in the same category as your classmates. I have read an abundance of books on the Thorn Fairy.

Ortho: Oooh, so you're saying you might actually have a leg to stand on. Then this might actually be promising.

Ortho: Alright, then let's pick a day for our discussion sometime later. Heheh, I'm looking forward to it.

[Ignihyde Dorm – Birthday Party Venue]

Sebek: This is the final question.

Sebek: “How do you spend your days off?”

Ortho: Hmm, there's a lot I do, but… I guess I often find myself watching movies or stage plays online.

Ortho: Recently, though, I've been spending lunch or tea time with my dorm and classmates.

Sebek: Lunch and tea time? You don't eat, though.

Ortho: Yep. But my goal there is to just chat with everyone. I also listen to their grumbles about their studies or relationships with others.

Sebek: Humph, how absurd. What good will come of listening to other people complain? Why don't you try spending your time doing something more worthwhile?

Ortho: Ehh, but it's pretty interesting. Just by watching how people react over every little thing helps me learn, too.

Sebek: What do you mean, learn?

Ortho: I've found that all the stories I hear from people are really good references for me to look back to whenever I need to act a part.

Sebek: Act a part…? Ah, right, you joined the Film Research Club. So essentially, you're saying you're feeding off of human interactions.

Ortho: Ah. This past weekend, we didn't have a club meeting, so I went into town with my brother.

Sebek: Your br… YOU MEAN TO TELL ME IDIA-SENPAI ACTUALLY WENT OUTSIDE!?

Ortho: Yep!

Ortho: We play this one game that uses our phones' GPS function, so sometimes we head out there together.

Ortho: We'll go to a restaurant that's an in-game spot where we'd be able to gather items and pick up some food that we'd already ordered online…

Ortho: And once we get to Whistle Park, we'd eat at one of the benches there. After that, we'd plan out the rest of our day there.

Ortho: And then, when he's done eating, we'll walk around the park looking for items, or have some encounter battles.

Ortho: Kinda sounds fun, like a real picnic, right?

Sebek: I can't say I know what game you speak of, but… It definitely does seem like you have a good time.

Sebek: Back home, my parents, older brother and older sister would always take me to the park to spend time.

Ortho: Heh, sounds like you and your family are pretty close, too. That's just like us!

Ortho: Me and my brother, as well as our dad and mom, used to go play at the nearby park, or even at a forest or river back in the day, too.

Ortho: …Although ever since my brother started to shut himself inside his room, we haven't been able to go anywhere as a family anymore.

Sebek: Well, it seems Idia-senpai has gotten to the point where he can actually go outside again. Perhaps there will come the time that you will be able to travel somewhere as a family again?

Sebek: That person needs to leave the house more. You should do what you can to take him out camping, traveling, or what have you.

Ortho: Yep, you're right. Sebek-san, thanks for your advice!

Sebek: I'm your presenter, after all! It's only natural that I should be able to present this sort of advice.

Sebek: You may come ask me anything you wish when you plan to take your family on a trip outdoors.

Sebek: The interview has now concluded. Here, your broom. There are blue flowers in the center of the bouquet, it suits you rather nicely.

Ortho: Woah, this is my first ever personal broom! I didn't actually think I'd get one.

Ortho: There's so many different kinds of flowers here. I'll have to fly carefully so as to not blow them away with my jets.

Sebek: Take this broom and take flight. That is testimony to your status here as a student of the most prestigious Night Raven College.

Sebek: Don't you dare show us a shameful sight on your birthday, Ortho.

Ortho: Of course! Make sure you keep your eyes on me while I fly, Sebek Zigvolt-san!

Ortho: it's time to show off the special gear that I made specifically for today. I'm totally gonna shock everyone who gathered here for me.

Requested by @rotattooill.

[sofiareidings]

Don’t Cry Over Spilt Coffee

Summary: You quite literally bump into someone at a coffee shop and strike up a conversation. Who knew that person would end up being Dr. Spencer Reid.

A/N: This is my first criminal minds fic, so I apologize if it isn't great. Also, this doesn't have much romance, just very light flirting. I would be open to turning this into an actual story and not a one-shot if anyone wants to see more.

Word Count: 1.2k

“I have a black coffee and a chocolate croissant!” The barista yelled out the order once more until you finally pushed through the group of people waiting to order to grab it. Taking the croissant out of the paper bag it was in while exiting the coffee shop you didn’t notice the man walking towards you, completely distracted by the chocolate sticking to the paper when you finally looked back up you smacked right into the man spilling your coffee out onto the road.

“Oh crap, my coffee.” You mumbled and looked up at the man, he was much taller than you. He seemed slightly embarrassed by the encounter. “I’m so sorry I was distracted by my croissant and I- it doesn’t matter. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, miss, I should have been paying attention.” He laughed a little, out of nervousness. His one hand found its way into his pocket and the other ran through his hair, tucking it behind his ear. The girl was pretty, and he felt like he must have been blushing. “Um, could I buy you a new coffee? It looked like you didn’t even get to start drinking it.”

“Oh I can’t accept that, it was my fault.” You protest for a minute but give up, the man kept insisting and at that point a free coffee didn’t sound too bad. You stood up more straight, adjusting anything that came out of place when you guys collided. “Can I atleast get your name?”

“Oh, yeah, my name is Spencer. What’s yours?” He made the first move and opened the cafe door letting you go ahead. The place was less crowded by now, only one person ahead of the two of you.

“I’m Y/N.” The man ahead finished paying and made his way out of the cafe. Spencer started his order then turned back to you, asking for your order. “Just a black coffee please.”

Once Spencer finished paying you both moved away from the counter, waiting for your drinks. “Where are you going after this?” He found himself fidgeting with his hands now that all you were doing was waiting.

“I’m supposed to go home and finish a project for work. I’m a crime journalist.” You smile while dreading internally the paperwork waiting for you at home. “I’m finishing up this article on this murderer Frank Breitkopf, he killed almost two hundred people over the course of thirty years. The media nicknamed him the I-80 killer. Have you heard of him?”

“Uh, yeah I have heard of him.” He laughed a little, making you a little curious. Did you say too much? Ramble for too long? “I worked on that case. I’m part of the Behavioural Analysis Unit.” He smiled then walked over to the counter to grab the drinks from the barista who had just called out the order.

“Oh my goodness, you’re Dr. Reid!” You took the coffee from him then smiled, you thought you had recognised him from somewhere. You’d seen his photo while doing your research for your article. “You should know that I spoke very highly of your team and you specifically in my article. That means you cannot hate it no matter what.”

“Oh, then I must read it when it’s published. I’m sure it’ll be great.” He laughed which made you laugh as well. You can’t help but feel a little warm in the face after the compliment. When you had seen his picture a few weeks ago you’d thought he was pretty cute but he was definitely way cuter in person. To try and hide how red you could feel your cheeks getting you coughed into your sleeve then looked down at the floor. Spencer must have thought you were embarrassed by his comment and apologised. “I’m sorry, that must’ve been a little forward. I know that when you write something it always is a little scary to share it with other people. You know a lot of studies show that we subconsciously put private parts of our lives into our creations which is why most people get really embarrassed or nervous about sharing it.”

“That’s actually really interesting, I guess it has always felt like that. It’s really cool that you knew that.” There was genuine excitement in your voice, you weren't sure why you felt so bubbly around him. Normally you’re very quiet or just generally like to be alone but this stranger you met maybe ten minutes ago is making you feel comfortable. More people started to file into the cafe which was the queue for the two of you to step outside. “So what’s it like? I mean it must be hard actually seeing everything I have been writing. I mean sometimes I have nightmares and it’s not like I actually saw everything.”

“Obviously there is a lot of bad but what I’ve learned is that I should focus on those we saved rather than those we couldn’t.” The question made him go quiet for a second, like he had to think about it. Maybe there was some type of bad memory? You felt a little bit bad about asking in the first place. “In the end it’s worth it.”

“That’s a good way of looking at it.” You smiled a little bit, trying to lighten the mood. Why did you have to let your curiosity get the best of you and ask that question? You couldn’t figure out why but there was this feeling of panic inside of you. It was this feeling that if you ended up leaving today without getting a way to keep in contact with this man you wouldn’t know what to do.

“I hate to cut this conversation short, but I really should get to work.” He stood up straighter and gave a small smile, he really didn’t want to leave. This girl had made him feel something he couldn’t understand. This was one of the first times he started dumping a random fact he knew onto someone and they didn’t just shut him down. That had to mean something right? “I’ll make sure to read that article when you publish it, I hope to see you at some point Y/N.”

He turned back and smiled, his face a light shade of pink. “Oh, uh, it’s in your beret.” You shot him a confused look and touched the side of your head. Sure enough, there was a small piece of paper with a number scribbled down. When you looked back up to say something, he was already gone. Who was this guy? A genius, nice, funny, incredibly hot, and now a freaking magician?! You turned away shaking your head, questioning if there really was some type of god out there. Why else would you have met a guy like this?

He waved and started to turn away. That’s it? He’s just going to leave but not try to keep in contact in any way? In a moment of desperation you yelled to him even though he had barely walked away. “Can I atleast get your number?”

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

Hi hi!! I have a compulsive need to reread sea glass gardens at least once a week, and your writing feels like a personal attack and a bandaid at the same time lol

One thing that popped into my head, and im not sure if it been asked before, but im wondering about ijichi's role in the universe?

Like in canon he knows about itadori being alive (which may have just been circumstances) so i feel like there is a level of trust there, and ijichi was an underclassmen to the Teen Parenting Trio too right?

Just wondering how he's feeling rn, my man gets so stressed by everything

So I've definitely answered this before but tumblr's search function is shit and I can't find where the post is. So let's do it again.

Ijichi is so so stressed by everything right now. The man needs a xanax and a vacation.

So, I have this entire analysis of Yaga floating around somewhere, which includes the fact that he is not in Gojo's inner circle but Ijichi absolutely is. And a big part of that is that Ijichi knew that Itadori was alive and kept the secret for Gojo. Like, yeah, he happened to be there when he came back to life, but he never told anyone, and Gojo never seemed worried that he would. He's the assistant that Gojo most consistently assigns sensitive tasks to, like Yuuta's parentage. I think Ijichi is legitimately in the inner circle for Gojo, and I kept that consistent for sea glass gardens.

Ijichi wasn't a Teen Parent the way the rest of the Teen Parenting Trio was. He was their underclassman, but he had never been a part of the core group of Geto, Gojo, Shoko, Haibara, and Nanami because he arrived after things went to shit, and also he almost immediately changed tracks to becoming an assistant because Gojo told him he was fucking useless as a sorcerer and going to die (canonically). As a result, he didn't have the same history with Gojo as Nanami and Shoko did when he adopted the Fushiguros. He wasn't invited to the PTA nights or to fuck off with the kids that one time they all packed up and ran when Megumi and Tsumiki were still tiny.

That being said, he was very much involved with the Fushiguros from a young age. He adores them.

Initially, he was just a sort of defacto babysitter. He liked the kids a lot and wanted the best for them, even if he wasn't treated as a part of the core family. And it's actually the way that he treated megumi and tsumiki that led him to becoming part of the core group.

So, based on what's been said in sea glass, we know that the Zenin initially didn't know that Megumi was the Ten Shadows and gave him up with minimal grumbling. Then, they found out what his techinque was and lost their shit.

This isn't going to be said in sea glass, but in my mind, Gojo didn't tell the Zenin that Megumi had the Ten Shadows. He was spotted at the school by Naoya.

Megumi just didn't know that it was a big deal to have his shikigami out. He was tiny. He didn't know they were anything special. He had his puppies out with him while he was waiting for Gojo on school grounds, and Naoya saw them, and he just laughed and started dragging Megumi off to the car lot. He didn't hate Megumi back then. He didn't like him, but he didn't know him yet either. He was Toji's boy, and of course Toji's boy would have the Shadows. Of course. He was vaguely planning to bring the Shadows home and get one over on Gojo, giving him the leverage he needed to kick his eldest brother down the ladder, and he didn't really care about how megumi was thrashing and kicking and trying to get free. It barely registered.

In my mind, Ijichi's the one that interfered.

He almost got his ass beat. Like, he was very close to having that four year old boy intervene on his behalf now because Naoya had him by the shirt against a car and was about to make sure Ijichi met god, and Megumi was always this feral biting child who was more than willing to have his puppies rip someone's fucking head off. But he was the one that saw Naoya dragging Megumi off, and he was the one that got in his way in defense of Megumi. Granted, Gojo was the one who had to show up and actually stop Naoya, but Ijichi went after Naoya knowing he could never win that fight. He did it to protect Megumi.

That's the first thing that led Gojo to trust him.

The second happened when the incident that made Gojo cut off the Zenin permanently. Everyone lost their goddamn minds. The Zenin wanted Megumi back yesterday, and the higher ups wanted Gojo to back off and return him. Yaga sided with the higher ups, because he thought that this wasn't a fight they could win.

Ijichi sided with Gojo and the kids. He didn't care if it was a fight they could win. He had never cared about whether he could win a fight when it came to protecting the Fushiguro siblings. He never could win the fights he took up for them. He just did it anyway.

Those kids were his little buddies. He babysat them regularly. He loved them fiercely. And he didn't care that he was a shit sorcerer doomed to get himself killed if he ever fought. Those were his kids.

He thinks of them vaguely in this sort of younger cousin role. He's not their parent and doesn't think of himself as such, but he's watched them grow and thinks of them as his family.

Since the Zenin incident when Megumi was a little kid, Ijichi has been the only assistant trusted with having any contact whatsoever with them--until recently. Back then, they cut Megumi and Tsumiki off from almost all contact with the wider jujutsu world for their own protection. The Zenin would do anything to get close to Megumi again, so they wouldn't let anyone near him at all. Over the years, Gojo has slowly let a few very select people from the jujutsu world have contact, but no one who he hasn't personally vetted. A few of his most trusted students, so Megumi could have more sorcerer influences in his life. Kamo Noritoshi, because Gojo thought that Megumi needed friends and made the dazzlingly poor judgment call that he would like Kamo. But Ijichi was the only assistant allowed anywhere near Megumi or his sister. Gojo didn't trust that the Zenin wouldn't bribe assistants to spy on them.

About six months before the start of sea glass gardens, Gojo decided to lift the ban and allow other assistants to have contact with them. He regrets that now.

Megumi's been cut off from the wider jujutsu world for almost his entire childhood. Like, he knows plenty about jujutsu sorcery, to be clear. He goes on missions regularly and his tutors in sorcery are three of the most valuable sorcerers alive at the moment. But he wasn't exactly rubbing elbows with the masses. He stopped going to the school after the Zenin incident. He only met the very select few that Gojo personally introduced him to. He didn't go to the Zenin compound or the Gojo compound or the Kamo compound. It was all for his protection, but they knew that it wasn't something they could sustain when he hit high school.

High school meant reentering the jujutsu world. It meant the Zenin having the first glimpse of him since they lost custody of him. They knew that shit would hit the fan and that the Zenin would try to make contact again--not to mention the other parties in their world interested in the Ten Shadows.

They wanted to ease Megumi back into the jujutsu world in what they thought was a low-risk way. They started letting a few other assistants than Ijichi convey messages to the Fushiguros when they were needed. That was it. He thought it was a baby step towards testing the waters that wouldn't have blown up the way it did.

In a few months, Gojo was planning to introduce Megumi to his upperclassmen. He was going to bring a few of them by to meet Megumi on his turf first. Yuuta was his top choice for this, and maybe Inumaki. Maki was trickier because she was Zenin. He was planning to bring him by the school before he officially started, but was secretly hesitant because Megumi hadn't been to the school since the time the Zenin beat him badly enough to hospitalize him.

He was trying to reintegrate Megumi slowly, because maybe then he could spot the ways the Zenin tried to worm their way back into his life and put a stop to them. He thought they'd pay people to spy on him, maybe hang around the school trying to make contact again.

He never thought they'd use one of the assistants to cut off contact to him, kidnap Megumi when he was too busy to realize Megumi was gone, and immediately fucking kill him.

He wishes he still only allowed Ijichi near them. This wouldn't have happened then.

Gojo would never admit this out loud, but the way the Zenin treat Megumi legitimately terrifies him. He's used to his own childhood as the Gojo's beloved godling--it wasn't a healthy childhood, and it was a little dehumanizing, but they'd never dare lay a hand on him. The Zenin treat Megumi like he's a toy they're trying to break. They scream about Gojo stealing him from them like he's their cherished prince, but whenever they have him, they nearly shatter him.

He almost didn't go get Megumi. He almost didn't save him. There's a world out there where Megumi is the little godling of the Zenin clan and has no one to protect him from the people who were supposed to love him, because Gojo never took him in.

Gojo thinks about it a lot.

Right now, Ijichi's right back to being the only assistant that is allowed in spitting distance of Gojo's kids. He and Shoko were the only people Gojo told, and he's been integral to arranging everything while this is going on. They're operating on minimal manpower. Nanami refuses to leave the campus while Megumi's bedridden (though no one would ask him to) because Megumi needs someone on campus to protect him constantly. Shoko is stuck treating him. they need Gojo to look for the cure, and he's trying to spend as much time as possible with Megumi because that's his kid in the hospital bed.

Ijichi's running interference on literally everything else. He's integral to Team Save Megumi right now, even if he hasn't shown up yet in sea glass gardens. That's because he's busy doing the legwork.

He got to see Megumi briefly while Yuuta was asleep. He sat with him for a little while. He'd be with him now were he not so busy trying to help find his cure.

And he is. so stressed. He's developing a new ulcer right now. the man is not okay.

[doin-just-fine]

What the brain doin?? PT. 1 of a questioning median system's journey

"Why do I think I'm plural?"

Hello!

I am making this post for those who think they are a Median System. I've noticed our community is small and that there aren't many recourses out there to compare experiences to. The few that do exist have been very helpful so I thought I'd add to the pool to compare and contrast with.  In this post I will discuss how I reached the point of believing I am a Median System, why, as of right now, that label fits the best for me, and what my system is like on the inside. 

(THIS IS A SAFE SPACE FOR EVERYONE REGARDLESS OF ORGIN, LABLE, KNOWLEDGE, OR IDENTITY)

How did I get here?

I started learning about what plurality was in 2018 for a college psych course. At that point in time I just found it interesting; fascinated at how the brain reacted to trauma and why it would split off as a way to cope. A tiny part of me thought "am I....?? NAaaah!! I would know!! It would click and everything would all make sense and I would just know!!! Plus I don't have enough trauma." I developed a hyper-fixation on it for a bit but it fizzled out and I didn't reflect on it again for a while. 

In 2021 I took a course that looked at the abstract ideas and philosophies behind what consciousness really is. I decided that for my final research paper in that course I would write about DID and other forms of plurality and what implications their very existence meant for how we define consciousness. After that, the hyper-fixation was reignited. I started to reflect on myself again but came to the same conclusions. Until, I met my now partner, who is a system, in 2022. They taught me a lot about plurality. 

It's a bit fuzzy when I started questioning myself again or why. EDIT: I remembered! I ran out of ADHD medication and had to go without it for a couple weeks. For context, I haven't taken a break from my meds since I started them at age 8 and at the time of running out I was on the highest dose of really strong stuff. After this break I started to notice how much my meds suppressed my emotions and creativity, eventually I got more medication. I then started asking my partner more questions about how they figured it out they were a system, how they knew, what did they do, how did they navigate embracing it, etc. I was a bit obsessive about these questions and it wasn't hyper-fixation level obsessive, this was "I need these answers to survive" level obsessive. I started noticing anxiety around these questions that I had never felt before. Ya know, totally normal singlet stuff. 

I started a notes app note titled "Psychological analysis of myself" after I had a panic attack that felt like someone else was having it through my body. Like genuinely, it snuck up on me (unusual for my anxiety I usually can see it coming a mile a way) and then it felt like my body had the panic attack without me, I was just there along for the ride. It freaked me out, which is why I started the notes app. I started diving into more research on OSSD and more nuanced experiences of plurality that never came up in basic psychology research. 

Then the denial started. Heavy, aggressive, degrading, denial. I pride myself on have decent esteem and self love but this denial laughed in my face. I only felt this once before when I was failing a math class in 2019. It was the first class I had ever been so close to failing I tore myself apart about it. It was so unlike me to be so mean to myself. When having this denial dialogue in my head about how (aggressive language warning) I was attention seeking faker who was just lonely and wanted to feel special, it was always stated in “You are…” statements. For example: “You’re just faking.” “You’re stupid.” “I can’t believe you think this.” When I would have these conversations with myself I would feel myself getting tired. Not tired in a way where I needed a nap but more like a drifting tired. I know this may be connected to dissociation, or switching (unclear).

So in my notes app I would write the thoughts out as they came. I realized I was having a chat with myself. A great app for honestly singlets and plurals to download is ANTAR. It’s an app that lets you chat with you "emotions" to sort out emotional hang ups but if you label the emotions as your alters instead you can chat with your system! These conversations are why I didn’t fully fall back into denial stage.

For a moment I did. I concluded that I was just being silly and dramatic and blowing things out of proportion. But having those conversations on my phone that I could go back to and look at didn’t let me stay there for long. 

I went back and forth on the denial thing for a minute only because I couldn’t find label that fit how I felt about my potential system until I happened across Median System. There was the click. Everything fell into place. I sat and read the definition and just thought “That’s me”.

Why “Median System”

A Median System is describe as 

A median system (also called midcontinuum) is a system where members are not as distinct or separate from each other. It can be considered being somewhere between multiple and singlet.[1] Some are dependent on a single individual, or the dependence can be mutual in that there is no central individual. Some median systems feel more blurred between themselves[2]. Others may also be based around a shared identity or kin. The members of a median system are often described as aspects or facets. Some median systems may identify as different archetypes[1]. Despite being more fluid and similar, median systems can be very diverse. Median systems are often opposed to multiple systems, with multiple systems experiencing more distinction between headmates. Some may also oppose it to partitionary systems, but in fact, median systems can be either partitionary or blurian, as variance in identity and presence or absence of memory sharing do not necessarily go hand-in-hand.

For me, part of the reason that I was in such denial of possibly being plural was because I have little to no amnesia in my day to day but unlike OSDD-1b (which also lacks amnesia) I don’t have distinct others. It felt like me all the time but sometimes adjacent. Someone described the difference as feeling like a snake with multiple heads rather that multiple snakes in a cage. And a Median system it feels like being an individual with multiple consciouses instead of multiple individuals in one body. 

Other ways that I experience my existence are as follows: 

I sometimes use plural first pronouns when referring to myself because before this realization I would be talking about myself and my brain as separate from me.

I used to joke that I felt like a system that just never fractured. 

The way people describe masking but for me it feel like a more extreme level, where I’m not TRYING to change my behavior, it just sorta happens and I’m “someone else”. What I called masking felt more like skipping songs in a playlist to get to the right one instead of putting on a mask. 

Another thing I experience is sometimes I expect to see a different face in the mirror and I get weirded out while still recognizing that, that is me and my face. 

This one might be a stretch but I have seen other Median Systems mention it. I notice that proper singlets have 1 go to aesthetic. It may change over the years but that typically have 1. I have never been able to consistently identify with 1 aesthetic I typically cycle through several. Specifically for me it's punk, grunge, hippy, cottage academia, and dark academia. With a funky gender identity on top of all that.

I wrote this post on and off over the course of a few hours and I lost my train of thought. Please let me know if you have questions, clarifications, comments, or your own stories. My asks are open. I will probably speak more on this at a later date.

[highfantasy-soul]

NATLA Episode 6 - Masks (2/5)

[Masterlist of my NATLA thoughts]

An explanation of what I'm doing here and my history with ATLA.

Of course, full spoilers ahead.

<previous/next>

Aang begging Zuko to let him go save his friends seems naïve of him (it is, kinda) but Zuko's resigned 'no' at Aang's pleas is heartbreaking. He's not gloating, he's not angry at Aang, he's exhausted and beaten down and surely feeling guilty over all the arguments Aang is throwing at him - everyone assumes they know who Zuko is because of the mask he's put on since his banishment, but Aang is the one who can see through it. Aang's naïve belief in the inherent goodness of people extends even to his enemies and is such an important character trait.

The war council flashback is ssooooooo well done! Zuko clearly just happy to be there and not actually paying attention, then desperately fumbling for an adequate answer to his own plan for the attack - all of which any viewer who had been paying attention could see are bad plans. BUT when the general suggests his own plan, Zuko is smart enough to see the flaw in it - he's far from inept, he just wasn't ready to jump in with his own strategy at his first war council. The frustration and disappointment Ozai shows as he tried to prompt his first-born to prove to him he was worthy is much more interesting to me than Ozai just writing Zuko off from the start. Ozai's insistence that 'sacrifice is a part of war' really is a key aspect of why he does what he does - to his people and to his children - and ironically, is exactly what Roku and the other Avatars always advise Aang. While Ozai takes it to the extreme, and it's very important that you know when a sacrifice is going too far, the sentiment is a solid one. Soldiers die in battle - it's when you resign yourself to that and no longer fight against it or you feel a twisted sense of pride and accomplishment for 'bearing' that sacrifice that the issues really come up.

It's a GREAT detail that Ozai doesn’t break eye contact with Zuko as he asks which division it is that will be sacrificed - gauging his son's reaction.

How Zuko stands up against the general is just sooo Zuko. Again, SHOWING his honor, not just having Zuko yell it randomly. The plan is 'unworthy' of the fire nation - it's a dishonorable tactic. In Zuko's eyes, just like fighting with your face hidden and employing mercenaries, it's underhanded and not how the fire nation - as they have positioned themselves to be in the world - should behave. All that propaganda about the Fire Nation being the best and always doing what is right begins to crumble, but he believes, as of now, that it's 'just a few bad apples' and the system is still good. If he can just speak out against the aberrations in the system, then everything will be fine because the system is correct, others just aren't living up to the way 'the system tells you to be' in the Fire Nation. (Oh my god, I knew my current DnD character had a lot of Zuko in her (plus Azula, little bit of Yue, some Darth Vader, and others) but damn, this analysis is hitting very close to home for her).

The Blue Spirit animated episode really shows Zhao's station in the Fire Nation - other leaders think he's just on a vanity project going after the Avatar. This is shown in the live-action all the way at the beginning of the season with Ozai declaring him 'no one of importance'. I think the live action giving us an early look at that, and Azula seeing him as someone she can use to further her own gains, adds depth to Zhao as we're not doing the Jong Jong storyline. Having Zhao take command of Zuko's search for the Avatar lines up with the animated version, and I like how they combine Zuko breaking his banishment by sneaking into the fire nation to capture Aang in the animated series episode Avatar Roku (part 2 of the Winter Solstice) with his infiltration of the prison. In an animated show, you can have many repeats of plot points (Zuko defying the fire nation rules to capture Aang) and meld them into one plotline that gives the moments time to breathe.

As iconic as the Blue Spirit episode is, there's little connective tissue from Zhao capturing the Avatar and Zuko showing up as the Blue Spirit to get him out - for some reason he's on the roof of the building as Zhao gets his promotion, then somehow gets back to his boat and sails off without Zhao realizing he was in the area until his boat pulls up beside his, then there's no indication that Zuko has any informants that would let him know that Zhao has caught the Avatar in a remote location or that he sent him to that particular prison. How does Zuko know any of this? It's established that Zhao is the one with resources, not Zuko. Sorry to poke holes in this beloved episode, but if y'all are going to complain about the live-action, I need to bring up this stuff so I can compare it to how the live-action handled it.

So, how did the live-action do it? Zuko was already employing June to capture Aang, and since we know she's great at it (and succeeded before), she gets him and hands him off. Then Zhao comes and 'takes Aang off Zuko's hands' as he's been given charge of capturing the Avatar and he goes ahead and taunts Zuko with the location he's taking him to: hammering home Zhao's overconfidence and urge to gloat. So in the live-action, there are direct lines from Zuko tracking and capturing Aang, Zhao taking him to the prison, and Zuko showing up as the Blue Spirit. Yes, the vibes of the animated episode are immaculate and I'm sure a lot of the questionable plot holes concerning the spirit are to keep the mystery of who it is until the mask comes off - but according to first-time watchers of the live-action, they didn't call it was Zuko either until the mask came off, so I think, from a storytelling perspective, the way the live-action did it flows better and is more tight storytelling while still maintaining the mystery of the masked man's identity.

Zuko's performance here is so great - Dallas manages to capture Zuko's anger and frustration as well as his vulnerability so well without skewing too hard in either direction. The perfect balance is struck where I think the animated series sometimes fell short of as, even though the narrative was clearly trying to get us to see that Zuko wasn't a flat villain and that there was a chance for him to be redeemed, a lot of his actions were quite one-note in the beginning. There were definitely hints of his softer side like in episode 3 when he asks Iroh if he really meant that he had more honor than Zhao, but I think the live-action, like with many of the character shifts, made him more real and believable rather than a heightened cartoon version of the archetype (after all, cartoons are meant to be heightened).

From the moment we see Aang tied up in the prison, it's almost a complete shot-for-shot remake of the animated version - even down to Zhao dictating to his little note-taker - and it's soo good. Funny enough, Zhao even tells Aang to stop worrying about his past and start worrying about his future. Just as with Ozai's twisting of 'necessary sacrifices', we see Zhao twist the idea of moving on from the past into something darker. Zhao is the epitome of the new Fire Nation ideals taken to the absurd extreme - the hubris, arrogance, and ambition by any means necessary. And unfortunately, despite its absurdity, it's a very very real depiction we see every day (Trump and Elon Musk being prime examples).

The escape is so close to identical even down to Aang's little quip where he questions the masked man, gets no response and says 'IIIII'll take that as a yes' (or the live-action version 'Right, escape now, talk later' which is the same energy so if you had an issue with that, take it up with the animated show). Though I will always mourn the loss of the line "Wait! My friends need to suck on those frooooggss!!!" I understand the need to nix that bit.

The standoff at the gate between The Blue Spirit holding his blades to Aang's throat and Zhao ready to take them out was so well done. No words, but the fact that you can see Zuko's eyes behind the mask, hear his shallow breathing as he's terrified his plan might not work, it adds so much. Aang's confusion, Zhao's cocky assurance, then uncomfortable shifting as he realizes brute force won't work this time - the Blue Spirit isn't afraid of him (he thinks). So many layers of masks and bluffs make the scene so good, even though most of us know how it's going to end. Being introduced to the Yuyan archers with Azula and then having Azula be Zhao's backup was a great way to tie in him getting promotions and more resources than he otherwise would have.

In The Blue Spirit episode of the animated series, Sokka and Katara are benched by getting sick, but I like that the live-action changed it to being captured in the Spirit Realm by Koh - it lets then still do stuff (character building stuff) while out of commission and Aang's reason for being in the place he's captured is a lot more compelling than 'he was looking for frozen frogs'.

<Ok, next posts are going to be very in depth about Zuko and Aang's interactions after the escape and the Agni Kai - I have a LOT to analyze there>

[reunionatdawn]

My Analysis of the Best Paired Endings in 3H (Part 9: Caspar/Petra)

Catherine: When I told you I would cut down children with no hesitation, you looked disgusted. I take it that's the part you're struggling to accept? Caspar: Pretty much. I don't think I'd be able to do it, even if that meant disobeying orders.

Caspar and Ferdinand are the two most difficult students to recruit outside of their home routes because they can only get C-Support with Byleth before the time-skip. And this corresponds to how difficult it is for them to leave the Empire from an emotional standpoint. They can't even be recruited in Hopes. Caspar wasn't sure when to obey orders or act on his own morality. He got reprimanded for doing so in his C-Support with Byleth, and that single incident had a huge impact on his development.

Shez: You're taking this awfully well. Weren't you and Caspar childhood friends? Linhardt: Yes, but that is of little consequence now. He is not fighting for honor or any greater purpose. War is just his way of life, and he doesn't have the slightest intention of dying or losing.

Caspar has never known any other way of life but fighting and making a name for himself on the battlefield.

Caspar: Something is kinda bothering me. I was talking to someone the other day about how I want to distinguish myself in battle, and they said that meant I wanted the war to go on forever. Of course, I told them they were nuts… Then I actually started thinking about it. About what I'll be doing when the war ends, I mean. About what I'll even…be. Ferdinand: I do not think you have cause to worry. We may not know what the future holds, but you are delivering great results as a leader. Surely you will be held in esteem for such? Caspar: Sure, but doesn't that just mean my life is about nothing but fighting? I'm not a guy like you who's good at pretty much everything, so… Ha! Listen to me. I can't remember the last time I got in my own head like this.

He was more introspective about his circumstances in Hopes. But that only reinforced how unhappy he was with his way of life. It wasn't fulfilling for him to live only for war, but he had no real sense of identity other than as a warrior.

Caspar: Oh. Hey, Professor. I was just reading this letter from my father. Do you know him? He's a pretty big deal in the Empire. He only writes to ask how my training's going, or how many monsters I've killed. Stuff like that.

Caspar had a strong desire to punish evil in the world, but he possessed a very black-and-white sense of morality. That simplistic view of good and evil probably came from his father, the famous warlord Count Bergliez.

Caspar: My father was responsible for a lot of what happened to the Dagdans! Shamir: Are you responsible for your father's actions? Caspar: Well, no…but kinda? I know I wasn't there, but I gotta—

It is much easier to invade and conquer when you convince yourself that the enemy is evil.

Caspar: After we cross the Great Bridge of Myrddin, we'll be in my father's territory. We actually crossed it five years ago for the Battle of the Eagle and Lion. Remember? Ugh! This is terrifying! What am I gonna do? I gotta get a grip… Byleth: Don't worry, I'll arrange for your funeral. Caspar: You think we'll meet him on the battlefield and he'll kill me? The front lines cover a long stretch of land, you know! We might not even run into him!

Caspar was also terrified of his father. He didn't like the sound of thunder because it reminded him of his father yelling at him when he screwed up.

Caspar: All right! Off to the Kingdom's capital we go! What's the matter? Should I not be excited? I can't help it. Everyone's gotta have something to look forward to!

I was really struck by Caspar's demeanor in CF. He only ever focused on taking out whatever enemies he was ordered to and barely had anything else to say.

Caspar: It's so awful to see the Kingdom capital go up in flames, but at least we made it this far!

He fought alongside the Death Knight and invaded other nations without question. It was as though Count Bergliez was hovering over his shoulder the entire time.

Catherine: You have a strong sense of justice. You have clearly defined ideals. But that's not an asset on the battlefield. Ideals slow you down. They cause inner conflict.

It was truly sad because that wasn't who he was. He had his own ideals and criticized Catherine for submitting her sense of justice to another person. It made me realize that CF!Caspar couldn't do anything else but focus on fighting because otherwise the inner conflict would have destroyed him.

Caspar: I think… I can't deny who I am. I know you were right five years ago when you told me not to chase after that suspicious guy… But I still can't get over the possibility that he might have hurt those kids. I would have regretted not stopping him for the rest of my life. There's no way I could forgive myself. It sounds awful to say, but the safety of those kids is more important to me than the knights we lost.

His character arc was about realizing that it's okay not to follow orders and that he should live according to his own sense of justice.

Caspar: I've been wandering on my own for five years. I won't go back to that house or my father, that's for sure!

And leaving his father was necessary for him to do so.

Caspar: We weren't related by blood, but Randolph was still my uncle… Seeing him end up that way was… Never mind. It's nothing. Byleth: That's how it goes with war. Caspar: This wasn't just about war. It was a grudge. Or are you gonna tell me you're on Dimitri's side? I'm sure he never trusted me, being born in the Empire and all.

Like Ferdinand, Caspar can only access his Paralogue—where he can confront the "evil" Death Knight—if he defects from the Empire. The game incentivizes you to recruit him in AM, too. Not only does he share his Paralogue with Mercedes, but doing so in AM unlocks an additional scene for her to say goodbye to Emile. I'd argue that he has the best arc in AM due to his connection to Randolph. It was important for him to see the war from the side from the Empire's victims, so that he could have his worldview challenged.

Petra: It feels like…a knife against my throat. That I am making my grandfather obey the Empire. Because I am a hostage, it is not an option to be giving up. I must be fighting and winning and staying alive. I must do anything to be making life better for Brigid. To be making Brigid and the Empire stand as equals. That is what my people are wanting from me…and what my grandfather, the king of Brigid, is wanting! Byleth: And what do you want? Petra: My want? I…I am not knowing of that. The wants of my people are something I have power to achieve. Their wants are my own.

As a political hostage to the Empire, Petra fought extremely hard to survive, not for herself, but so that Brigid could live independently and stand as equals with the Empire. But when Byleth asked her what she wanted, she didn't even know. She needed to figure out what she wanted for herself, not just what other people wanted.

Ferdinand: Do you not want to go back to your homeland? Petra: I do have the hope of returning one day, but Fódlan is also like a homeland to me now. I came to Fódlan nine years ago. I have been living half of my life here. My family is living in Brigid, but in Fódlan, I have new family and new friends.

So, what did Petra want? Well, she wanted to return home, but she also wanted to stay connected to her new family, and to use their political connections to improve relations with Brigid and Fódlan.

Petra: When this war is finished, I am wishing for you to be seeing my homeland. Dorothea: You…you are? Oh my. I'd love to, Petra. As soon as the fighting is done, I'd like nothing more than to see Brigid with you.

She wanted to bring her friends back home with her to visit. Whether you go for their romantic paired ending or are content to leave them as friends, her Support with Dorothea showed how important it was for her to maintain permanent connections with her classmates.

Petra: I am not having an obligation. I will only be marrying if I find a good person.

And she also wanted a husband from Fódlan.

Petra: My father was killed. By the Empire. By your father. And so I will be impaling you on this blade to be satisfying a deep wish of mine. Caspar: A deep wish… What are you talking about?! Petra: I am talking about my wish. Of course…I am also having another wish. An even deeper wish. I wish for you and I to keep being friends. To keep fighting and surviving together.

Petra had one other deeply held wish. She wanted to kill Count Bergliez. She always bottled up her true feelings and never expressed what she really thought. She was always gung-ho about fighting and said war fed her body and mind. She may have acted like she was fine with her situation, but she was really not. She didn't want to kill people in the name of the Empire that invaded Brigid and killed her father, and she had a lot of rage underneath her calm surface.

Caspar: Well, I guess even a queen can't push her feeling down forever. I can't imagine what it must've been like to go through what you did. But I think I can still relate. Petra: Umm… Caspar: Hey, here's an idea. From now on, take it out on me. Petra: No. This is silliness. There is no point in killing you. Caspar: I'm not talking about killing, Petra. What I want you to do is unload on me! Tell me off! Just talk to me about whatever it is you're feeling. If all your hate becomes too much, dump it on me. If you wanna hit something, I'm your guy. I just want us to keep being friends, alright?

Caspar was the only character she ever showed that side of herself to. In Hopes, she wanted to kill him, but he offered for her to take her pain out on him. He was the one person she could talk to and be open and honest with because he was the same. And Petra was more raw and emotionally vulnerable with him than anyone else.

Petra & Caspar Petra returned to her homeland of Brigid, and inherited the throne from her grandfather. As ruler, she declared independence from Fódlan, and renegotiated Brigid's diplomatic ties to Fódlan and Dagda on more equal terms. At every step along the way, she was accompanied and supported by her husband, Caspar, who had left Fódlan behind to be with her. It is said that the people of Brigid were initially suspicious of the union, due to Caspar's relation to a nemesis of their homeland, but that his tireless efforts on Brigid's behalf endeared them to him over time. It certainly helped that he made the queen very happy.

Petra didn't have an obligation to get married. She just wanted someone to share all of her heart with. Caspar was never particularly envious of his brother, and he always liked hard work. So, working tirelessly for Brigid is a better way to live than inheriting his father's position and becoming the new Minister of Military Affairs.

I don't think the writers necessarily pushed for either Caspar or Petra to be paired with anyone in particular. Many of their paired endings work just as fine. Still, the Caspar/Petra ending is one where Petra can have everything she wants, including someone who she can be truly open and honest with. And it is the only one where Caspar can directly address the damage caused by his imperialist father. So, I consider it the best one for them.

[blueleopard555]

Explanation + Spoilers for Water Lessons!

Skip this if you don't want spoilers for chapter seven of my fic, Water Lessons. This might also include spoilers for chapter eight which has yet to be released at this time. NSFW warning!

A commenter on AO3 wanted more information on the Hakoda, Kya, and Ursa love triangle subplot I added. It might seem that I did it on a whim (Tbh, I kinda did at first), but I have my reasons, I promise.

First, the commenter asked, "What where the feelings of the three of them that night?" As mentioned, Ursa thinks both Kya and Hakoda are hot. Ursa is, on some level, also a bit jealous of their relationship. Of course, they have their flaws, but to someone who was married to and is now divorced from Ozai, they are perfect. They love each other, they have fun with each other, and they have great bonds with their children.

As for Kya, she does realize that Ursa has not had best marriage in the world. While finding her attractive, she still wants to be loyal to her husband. HC for this fic is that she's never been with anyone else other than Hakoda. High school sweethearts, you know? But... what if she does want to try being with someone else after all this time? What if she wants to know that Ursa is happy being alone? A good friend would want their best friend happy, right?

Hakoda on the other hand? His loving wife and some other attractive, trustworthy woman? He'll never say that out loud but perhaps he has imagined what Ursa might be like in bed. His wife is wonderful! Perfect! Yet... like Kya, could it be a bad thing to add spice to their bedroom? (IRL, PROBABLY YES, IT COULD BE BAD)

That drunken night, Hakoda got frisky with his wife. Being slightly drunk, Kya says it isn't fair for Ursa to only watch. A switch flipped on in Kya's brain as she watched Hakoda play with another woman. That IS hot. Alcohol mixing with pent up emotions/desires is a great way to have fun and/or have regrets in the morning.

The commenter then asks, "Would it be a one night only thing or go further?" Honestly, idk. I didn't think that far ahead tbh but we'll get to the meta stuff later. Regret would be felt by all parties, especially with all their children now knowing. For Ursa, her ex-brother-in-law is there on vacation with them! How awkward is that?! If it does continue, it would be after things cool off. Or maybe things don't happen. Two of their respective children are starting to date. Like I told that commenter, the three of them did have secret ideas of them doing something together again on this vacation.

Meta Analysis Time!

This whole story has two goals/themes: Getting Sokkla to happen and showing Azula grow as a person and overcoming her fears.

Learning about the threesome that took place goes on to be the catalyst for the "first major section" of chapter eight, "A New Day." (I guess it should be "A New Several Days" but whatever!) I don't want to give away too many spoilers but… lol… Azula reflects and makes a decision. It's that decision that I hope gets the ball rolling on "Azula has gone through a character arc." IDK if my arc for her is easy to see/understand but again, I'm trying. My writing is far from perfect. Since the subplot does not directly affect the final scenes I have planned, I didn't bother expanding on the love triangle aspect of the story other than it did happen.

Now… recall how I mentioned that I added the whole subplot as a joke? This whole fic started out as two ideas: Azula biting Sokka’s during a sexual scene and her reaction to Ursa sharing what she did.

[theandersenjournals]

do you have any headcannons for ur bug? :) ur silly guy .. guy we gotta put under a aaaa microscope - @knashingmawz

In preparation for this ask, I turned on Sean’s playlist and then immediately forgot about this ask because I HAD to go write a 2k word analysis on my own rp responses. And then I just kept forgetting. So let’s try to do this AGAIN, YAY, turning on the bleed out mountain goats album.

So, as for my Sean, I refer to him as my bug because I have a fascination with him. Specifically in the like . 🔍 studying manner. But also, actually, I do have this headcanon that he has a fascination with bugs. Actually, I like to imagine he likes all sorts of insects and arachnids and then also separate creatures like mollusks. Little things. 

Okay, onto more concise headcanons! Things I was told but cannot prove also go under this section, like Sean and Lee being childhood friends, Sean growing up in the cult as opposed to forming it, ect. But I use these to base my thoughts because these make for a fun and fascinating story to me! I like the idea that he grew up like this, and i’ve made a note about this when speaking to some friends, but;

Generally my big ones are on the family and building their worldbuilding and what exactly they stand for in the narrative. My favorite concept is that the leader never survives very long ; the leader is always whoever is most necessary to the goal at the time. Hence, why Sean became leader; he was loyal and as close to a Carrier as anyone could be, he had the means to be useful. Before him, it's always pastors, politicians, police, doctors, ect, people who are important, and the cult teaches the children to grow into these professions to garner as much power as possible. They want their hands everywhere, in everything, hearing and speaking to as many as they can. The Family teaches closeness amongst members, speaks that they are the only ones who will find salvation in the new world, that the Leaders will be the gods that reign alongside The Speaker when the world ends and is started anew (by merging purgatory with the overworld! that one's canon) but! the leader of each sector of the cult (i like to pretend it's much bigger than it likely is) never makes it too long! because someone else is always more useful, more important, like Sean! Therefore, they tend to fall into madness from The Speaker's whispers and pass on at its hands, or kill themselves to escape once it starts getting bad. which, funny enough, was HIS fate too! He tells Lee that he gave up his family and his humanity for the Speaker, of course he’s in it’s world in the afterlife, and it’s “his will.” 

Significantly more fucked up headcanon: leaders and important figures to The Family get branded or otherwise 'marked' to display their loyalty and exactly who or what they belong to. Sean got branded when he became leader and at the same time he got REALLY hooked on The Speaker and hes very proud of that fucking mark. "this is my divine right" ass. He’s in deep!! I also like to imagine he leaves this same scar on Lee, sort of binding them together, The Leader and The Carrier, two beings that can never escape their binding fates, they will both be tools for the new world and be together in the afterlife– Sean says this in the series too; they’re going to the same place!

Sean: You think I'd go somewhere else when I died? After sacrificing my humanity- to him? Lee: You're not real! You're not real! Sean: You know- the same thing will happen to you, when you go. Lee: Shut up! Shut up!

This also links into a secondary thought I have about him in which he’s really fucking weird about pain ; The Speaker, canonically, makes whoever it speaks to- sick. Okay, not sick. It actively hurts. It hurts like nothing you've ever felt, according to Lee. And then, if you listen long enough, it has a drug quality to it; Sean is quite literally addicted to his own god! And that shit HURTS, but it feels good, it feels powerful, it feels– right! It becomes necessary, something to attach to, you need it like you need breathing, and you start to associate this pain and agony with good things, pleasure, greatness, going through this means you get this BLESSING of hearing The Speaker’s voice! So now Sean tackles everything with this concept; Pain brings good things, it brings clarity, pain is associated with everything he needs. This doubles; I like to think The Speaker literally warps the way you think. I think , in the sense of a leader , it needs someone cruel and ruthless. We know it's incredibly intelligent, we know it's a mastermind of sorts- it's not hard to make the jump and assume that on top of it all; the irritation and swings of withdrawal, the desperation, all of it- it's fully capable of destroying who you are and turning you into something monsterous in it's image. That's what a good leader should be, ^_^ Resembling their god!

Fuckingngngng freak. I have more thoughts about him. Nicer thoughts. He looks at birds and thinks of Lee. Him and Lee were childhood friends— Sean picks lizards off of bricks and shows them off. They tussle in the grass together. They get fuckin drunk off their asses in the back of Sean’s busted ass car and talk about the future– Sean always said he never knew what he wanted to do. He meant it, because his fate was already decided by someone else. Him and Mo knew each other because of this. He never really had stuffed animals as a kid and he thinks theyre really dorky but he keeps getting them as gifts and from games and shit and he really likes them . he wears almost exclusively graphic tees and band tees and its weird as FUCK to see him wearing anything else. adnd ten million more things but god this is a long post can you send me another ask /silly

overall, one thing: he is THIS FUCKIN SONG! canaries in the coal mine by john congleton and the nighty nite. thats sean wf.

[mischief-lies-and-stories]

I Can't Stop Writing Post-Season Ficlets

I have another one queued for tomorrow (though if you follow my AO3 account, you may have already seen it). Here's another one. Spoilers for episode 5 and a still from maybe episode 6 that I don't know the source of.

So basically I saw this photo and because I'm a fool and in utter denial about the implications of Sylvie's expression oh my god, I wrote this fic. (The fact that it looks like she's crying is really upsetting me, so I said "You know what? No, she's not.")

Going Home

He watches Loki, a past Loki or a future Loki or maybe just a different Loki, speak to himself in these memories he doesn’t remember, in this time he hasn’t been part of for who knows how long. He hears Loki quote his own words back to him, watches the god help him through a temperamental, experimental Time Door, sees even from this distance the way Loki looks at him, like he holds all the answers when he can’t even remember Loki’s name. 

“Are you ready?” Sylvie asks.

No. Not even close. “What am I doing?” He whispers, voice raw as it scrapes against his throat, speaking more to himself than her. Loki couldn’t even bring himself to come with them, bidding Mobius goodbye at the TVA instead, muttering some lie about having too much to do there.

But it’s clear now, as Mobius watches their past or alternate selves stumble through a meeting there isn’t time for, but that Loki is clearly taking great care at trying to get right. He had been so angry with Loki earlier, when the god had declined taking him back to the timeline, instead asking Sylvie to escort him. He had felt like nothing, like some odious chore being pawned off onto someone else to take care of. But he sees now it was nothing like that.

Loki asked Sylvie to take him back, refused to accompany him, because he couldn’t, because he would not be able to say goodbye again. Loki respects Mobius’s choice to return to his time, but doesn’t trust himself to let Mobius go if he comes with. Because… because…

Mobius’s past self turns to look at OB’s past self, and Loki continues to watch him. Mobius thinks of Loki time-slipping into the War Room, yelling his name like just the sight of him will make everything better. He thinks of crash-landing into the TVA after Loki flew out of the time stream at the last possible second, the relief blossoming in his chest as Loki’s arms tightened around him. He thinks of Loki’s surprised smile in the automat when he suggested tricking Brad into giving up Sylvie’s location. He thinks of Loki turning to look at him as Timely descended the stairs, searching for him immediately in what must have been (he realized later) the moment Loki returned from the past. 

“This is where you belong,” Sylvie says gently, in answer to the question he scarcely remembers uttering. 

“He loves me, doesn’t he?” Mobius whispers, finally tearing his gaze away from the scene before them to look at Sylvie. 

She looks at him, eyes sympathetic. She nods, and says softly, “But this is your place.”

He shakes his head. “No,” he says, just as quietly. “It’s not. And it shouldn’t have taken me this long to figure it out.”

“Mobius–” She starts, but he pulls out his TemPad and programs in the TVA.

“Are you coming?” He asks her. She shakes her head, holding up her own TemPad.

“Are you sure this is what you want?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I’ll see you around.”

She watches him for a moment, and then she smiles. “You’re going to make him very happy, you know that?”

“I hope so.” Then he turns away from her and walks through the Time Door.

He walks into Analysis, but of course, Loki isn’t where he left him. B-15 looks up from a monitor and smiles with surprise.

“You’re back,” she says.

“I made a mistake.” He replies.

“I’ll say.”

“Do you know where he is?”

“OB saw him walking toward the automat a while ago.” She doesn’t have to ask him who he means, and he sees her smile widen.

“It’s that obvious, is it?” He asks. He’s been an idiot.

“Kind of, yeah,” she nods. “Go get him.”

He doesn’t need to be told twice, taking off in the direction of the automat as fast as his legs can carry him.

He’s there, thank God, head in his hands and long legs splayed where he sits in the small, metal chair. His shoulders shake and it breaks Mobius’s heart, but the sight of him is gorgeous and perfect and he has no idea how he walked away from this man in the first place. His feet carry him forward, not even pausing in the doorway for a moment. 

When he’s a few feet away, Loki looks up, tears tracking their way down his cheeks and eyes awash with sorrow. They widen when he sees Mobius. 

“Mobius, you’re back. What are you–” Mobius doesn’t wait for him to finish his question, taking him into his arms and kissing him firmly. Loki melts against him with a whimper that makes Mobius ache. Mobius pulls him close, threading fingers into his raven hair, wiping away the tears that still fall from his closed eyes. 

At last, they pull away, Mobius gazing down at Loki, hands framing the god’s wet face. 

“I’m sorry,” Mobius says, hoarsely. “I’m sorry I left you. I don’t belong on the timeline. My place is here, with you. I want to be with you. I want to stay,” his voice cracks, then, and he feels the tears begin to fill his own eyes. “If that’s what you want and I haven’t completely misinterpreted everything, but I–”

“Mobius.”

“I love you.” Mobius says in a rush, before Loki can say anything else. And then, because it wasn’t nearly as difficult to say out loud as he’d expected it to be, he says it again. “I love you.”

Loki lets out a noise that sounds heartbreakingly like a sob and presses his face into Mobius’s chest. Mobius holds him, stroking his hair. “I’m sorry that for a moment there it seemed like I didn’t. I’ve never…. I’m not used to this, Loki. You’ve turned my life upside down, and I’m not talking about helping to cause the multiverse and conspiring to kill my boss.”

Loki snorts a laugh, which seems like a good sign, so Mobius goes on. “I thought I’d figured it out, but everything was happening so quickly. And then when we finally had a minute to breathe, you said I should go back to my past. And I’m not blaming you; I probably would have said the same thing, but I thought, okay, that makes sense. And I thought maybe what I had thought was happening wasn’t really, because I had no experience with anything like this so what would I know about falling in love? It’s not like OB put it in their guidebook or that workplace romance is a TVA-sanctioned training. 

“And then you wouldn’t even take me back to the timeline, and I completely misunderstood your reasons for that.” Loki pulls away then, looking into Mobius’s face. Mobius can’t seem to stop touching him, though, but that isn’t exactly new. He strokes Loki’s face, and Loki leans into his fingertips.

“I’m sorry.” Loki whispers. “I should have realized how that would look to you. I should have been able to go with you. Just the idea of watching you walk away from me was so painful I could think of nothing else.”

“Hey, it’s okay,” Mobius murmurs, stroking his thumb across Loki’s cheek. “I understand now. 

“Sylvie took me back to the moment you took my past self with you, and I realized…. You were just so careful. You spoke to me so gently and helped me through the Time Door.”

Loki startles him by letting out a huff of laughter. “I learned that from you,” Loki tells him. “You’ve treated me like that from the moment we met.” He looks down at Mobius’s hands, still framing his face affectionately, then back up into Mobius’s eyes. He smiles, and Mobius returns it.

“You couldn’t stop looking at me.” Mobius says. Loki’s green eyes, still wet with unshed tears, sparkle with mischief. 

“I learned that from you, too.”

Mobius’s smile widens. “Well, maybe that’s why I knew what I was looking at when I saw it.”

Loki kisses him. “I love you, too,” he says. “Did I say that already?”

“I think you were too busy reacting to my saying it, but I appreciate you saying it now.” 

“You’re staying? Really?” Loki keeps his tone casual, but his face pinches slightly with worry, and it makes Mobius ache. Both intentionally and not, he’s caused this fear of loneliness in Loki. He will work the rest of his life to assuage it. Loki is worth it. 

“Yes,” Mobius says. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise.”

[drbased]

Thank you so much for answering ! I was so hesitant about sending that ask because to me it was just an unnecessarily morbid and sad vent, so imagine my surprise when you said it was lovely to receive 😹

I have watched the alt right playbook series when it came out ! I used to be very involved in skeptictube back in the day and everyone recommended it. I'll need to rewatch it ! I was wondering if you had recommandations about the satanic panic specifically, as you mentioned listening to/watching something about it ?

Your paragraph about conspiracy theories is SO on point! I definitely need to translate it and show it to my mother, you worded perfectly what I've been trying to explain to her. Q anon really is a good example of these things because it is exceptionally stupid and extreme.

A few things about the Emmanuel Macron theory :

My father didn't come up with it, he never does. I'm not sure how to say it in english but my father is very influencable, he is very easily convinced by people trying to sell him products (or ideas...). Most of his ideas come from people he follows on twitter and odyssee. As for the theory itself : the idea that Brigitte Macron is actually male is very popular amongst french conspiracy theorists, and I suppose you are not aware, but even without that she is quite the controversial figure. She was the president's teacher in high school and if I remember correctly, when he got his diploma she left her husband for him and they have been together even since. I'm not giving my opinion on this whole debacle because it's above my paycheck lol, but as long as my father has known who this woman is, he has hated her with a burning passion and made it very clear from how he talks about her. Long story short he wants her hanged on the time square 👍. This is all very hypocritical of him considering he never had any moral issues with his sister (my aunt) marrying a man she started dating when she was 12 and he was 28. And never acting up and doing something to help her when he turned out to be abusive. (Shocker I know)

For your answers : I agree with everything apart from the fact that Macron is a right wing politician and my father also wants HIM dead 👍 he wants everybody dead. He used to be anti death penalty and a profound pacifist, but now he cannot dislike things or people normally. Everything becomes extremely violent.

Writing all this has been very cathartic! This situation has been harder and harder to live by the day (I still live with my father after all) and I've been having a bit of a breakdown because of it. It's hard to remain cordial and polite with someone like this everyday, because every activity, every subject of conversation is tainted. It has taken all the joy out of our home life, mine especially. So thank you for hearing me out :) you're really cool

Nice to find another informed and cultured fellow like myself! I'm very glad you're familiar with the alt right playbook. Imo it should be standard 'reading' for any wannabe leftist. My favourite video is the one on 'controlling the conversation' which has entirely shifted how I engage with people online, and is responsible for why you don't see me argue much on here.

Don't worry about being morbid, I'm used to all sorts of things I probably shouldn't burden my fragile mind with. Regardless, I think it's so important that women speak out about our experiences with each other. What I find so fascinating about feminist analysis is that literally every subject you can name will inevitably relate back to some patriarchal ideology/practice - which makes sense because women are 50% of the population and male oppression is so universal that of course it would permeate everything.

Huh, Macron's wikipedia page mentioned associations with the socialist party. And I also figured that it would make sense him being considered left wing, since right wingers are obsessed with emasculated, 'soft' men having left wing politics. However I did originally intend to put 'left wing' in air quotes because I'm aware that even self-proclaimed left wing parties are liberal at best.

Here's the video that sparked my thoughts - it's a much more standard exploration of the history of satanism so there's not much in terms of analysis, just history. I'm getting slowly used to it but now whenever I hear a man speak on a political/philosophical subject, the absence of feminist analysis is palpable. I'm a big fan of breadtube and skeptictube but since I started engaging with feminism I can't help but notice those glaring gaps where they'll say stuff like 'trads want women to go back into the kitchen because they believe that men and women should have certain roles' - they're so deathly afraid to address what those roles are and why they exist, it would be funny if it wasn't frustrating. If I find any better resources on satanism I'll let you know; it would be cool if anyone has any good book recommendations on things like satanism, conspiracy theories etc. from a feminist point of view. (I think Gyn/ecology might touch on it? I've not got a copy unfortunately).

I am very unsurprised that your father is fine with a age gap between an older man and woman but not the other way round. It's one of the oldest double standards in the book, I'd wager! Also unsurprised about the sharp turn to loving violence in all forms. It's funny isn't it, how the absurdity of qanon is so obvious - it's been said before by women on here that there seems to be something so enticing about these farcical ideologies. I think people like confidence, they like the idea of being sure against all odds, and the more ridiculous the assumption the more you have to take it in on faith - and then you're locked in, because admitting it was wrong will eventually require you admit it's also patently absurd. I think a lot of people just don't want to take that leap. There are a lot of books on how to escape cults that might be of interest? Combating Cult Mind Control by Stephen Hassan comes to mind - I haven't read it but I've heard good things about it.

I didn't know you still live with him - that's incredibly tough. I can strongly imagine how difficult that would make day-to-day life. I have experienced something similar before. Not being able to talk freely with loved ones in your own home really does change something inside you, I think. I'm glad writing it all out has been cathartic for you - we women need to do this more, our experiences need to be heard and documented. I hate the fact that because of our visibility online we can never give too much away, but there are ways around it I think. It's been so incredibly cathartic for me to write - it's made me feel not crazy, it's given me focus and purpose. Anyway, best of luck to you, I hope you get out of that situation as soon as possible, or at least find some way of making it more palatable for yourself.

[theroundbartable]

Hello again, Rai...Do you mind if I ask your top 5 (or top 10) favorite moments from any media that you love (books, anime/manga, tv series, movies, games, etc)? Thanks if you want to answer. Sorry if I ask too much and if I accidentally send this ask twice....

Hey there :)

I don't mind at all, thank you so much for leaving a message ^^ You did send this twice but that's alright, I didn't immediately answer it anyway. There is a lot more going on right now than I thought it would. And you don't need to feel like you're bothering me. ^^ This is what the ask box is for. I would disable it if I didn't want messages ^^

As to your question... I have some that left an impact on me and that even after 10+ years my cheese brain hasn't let slip through the cracks. But I don't really have favorites. They were simply favorites in the moment, so I'm listing them randomly. But they all did inspire me to write in one way or another. They are the reason why I'm here.

Harry Potter, the prisoner of Askaban. (disclaimer: I do not support JKR's views. I stand with the fandom.) In the scene when Sirius just invaded the Gryffindor tower and the students sleep in the Great Hall, Dumbledore says something that made me invested with fantasy and therefore writing and art. (I whatched it in German, so the translation is probably off.) "When we sleep, we venture into a world that belongs to us and only us. Maybe he's swimming in the deepest of oceans right now, or foating over the highest cloud."

How to train your dragon: The entire scene when Hiccs tries to befriend Toothless and he dances around that self drawn picture. I watched an entire youtube analysis on how the music was chosen. It's phenomenally fascinating and it's perhaps my favorite comfort movie. I can always watch the first movie (I don't care as much about the rest).

Elfenlied There is a scene in Elfenlied, the very first anime I watched consciously, when she breaks out of the facility. She's full of blood, she's still wearing the mask... This was the first time a scene inspired me to write a story. At the time I was 12 and wanted to make an original, but basically, this is the first media that truly made me write a whole novel. It sucked, but it's where I started.

BBC Merlin I want to say the entire fucking show, why else would I be here? I love everything in it but there is two scenes I adore to bits. A) "I think you're mad. I think you're all mad, people should marry for love, not convenience. And if Uther thinks an unhappy King makes for a better Kingdom, then he is wrong. Because you have a choice, as to how you do it." B) "How did you know this place was sacred?" M: It's obvious. A: Pretend it isn't. M: It's like... everything, the leafs, the ants, are vibrating. Full of life. Like everything is more than it seems."

Voltron legendary defender Yes, I am a Klancer. And I am of course referring to the Bonding moment. It changed my brain chemistry. :)

Fairy Tail You may not remember me from that long ago, but I used to write Gajevy fanfiction. And my favorite scene was the one when they were on that island for the S-Rank test and Gajeel ended up saving Levy. I loved how this ship grew from awkward to inevitable and I was there from the very beginning. Anyways, here the quote, again, from the top of my head because like I hell I look any of these up XD "It's hard to find someone small like you, so don't leave my side." This is all I can think of at the moment. Feel free to ask me more questions if you like ^^

[yellowhollyhock]

Since you seem to be an analysis expert on the 03 show. I saw someone say during the city at war arc that Raph wanted to let people die. Thoughts on this?

Kfkdjakdjdj I do enjoy analyzing, thank you for this ask

Short answer: Raph isn’t callous about people’s suffering. He would intervene if he saw someone getting hurt, he just didn’t want to go out looking for trouble. If you get rid of a bad politician does that make you thereafter morally accountable for all bad politicians whom he technically would’ve out-politicianed? Nah bro.

Long answer under the cut

The City at War arc is so interesting to me. I’m gonna try to take a fair look at it from each brother’s pov, with a main focus on Raph and Leo. Disclaimer: Raph’s position makes more sense to me and I am also writing this in his defense since the show kinda took Leo’s side.

The turtles defeated the Shredder and the city was plunged into chaos. Power vacuum yada yada, you’ve seen the episode (or if you haven’t you probably shouldn’t read this analysis). Leo’s basic position: We made a mess therefore we must fix it. Raph’s position: we did a good thing, evil still exists, we can’t be responsible for all of it.

This is really not a simple dilemma.

Leo is seeing things with a utilitarian lens; he’s judging their past actions based on the overall effect on the majority, not whether they acted with moral intentions or according to moral principles. This same approach would justify killing the Shredder, especially since they didn’t know it would cause a power vacuum. But now that their actions have led to a situation where a large number of people are (still) getting hurt, so the best possible ethical solution in Leo’s mind is to go out and finish what they started.

One thing we learn about Leo is that if he sees someone suffering, he isn’t going to ignore it. In that way we see the hero that he’s started to develop into. We also see, however, exactly how he handles guilt. And honestly, it’s not pretty. We all talk about Leo going out to look for fights later in the show after the Utroms imprison Ch’rell. Isn’t that what he’s doing here? It’s not as extreme, and it doesn’t stick out as much because he’s not as broody, but isn’t he trying to get rid of that guilty feeling by finding the end of the ‘task’ he’s set for himself? Doesn’t he feel like he failed and seems willing to do anything to make up for it? I mean, it’s not real clear what his plan is. He wants to make a difference; okay? Wasn’t he making a difference when he got rid of Shredder? Does he think is he keeps taking out the Next Worse Guy that the world will eventually run out of evil?

Of course he doesn’t cognitively think that. But he acts on it, showing perhaps somewhere inside he hopes it. And I’m a way this again shines a very positive light on him. He believes that the world can be good! And he’s ready to put in his own sweat and blood to make it that way! Maybe violence is not the way to do that, though? As they’re out doing it he does demonstrate caution and restraint. But you know. What was their other option?

The option Raph wanted was to keep going like they had been. Stick to the shadows, watch each other’s backs, and intervene with human issues if and when they’re able, rather than go out looking for problems to solve. What if everyone made that decision? To do everything we can to take good care of those close to us, and intervene when we see someone in need? It’s not a perfect philosophy either, but it’s not a solid start. It also shows a lot of growth on Raph’s part. In the past he’s handled his anger pretty much how Leo is handling his guilt: go out and see if he can find the right guy to punch to make the world make sense again. Led to some heroic moments, but maaaybe not the best philosophy to live by? I think that’s largely why he’s so against it. He sees Leo exhibiting the behaviors and traits he’s embarrassed by in himself. What he doesn’t see is how Leo is seeking connection with the world more than he ever used to, or the beautiful hope he holds. Basically, they learned from each other and they’re both thrown off by it.

We know that Mikey sees things Leo’s way. Makes sense for him because he’s already a superhero. He’s always had this idea of his family being Protectors; it’s a much more comfortable way to be separate than as Monsters. So when Leo says “here’s the mess and here’s why it’s our responsibility,” Mikey doesn’t pause to wonder where exactly Leo plans on stopping. He believes in his brother’s goodness and, like Leo, the world’s potential to run out of bad guys (again, I’m not saying they literally think that, but they hope for it, which can be both a huge source of strength and. Well. Naive). I think he’s a little more willing to see both sides—his family is central to his thinking and when Raph and Don don’t follow Leo Mikey doesn’t go after him himself. But he does want to help and tries to explain the situation to Donny.

As for Donny—I’m sure he understood the situation the first time when he heard it from Leo. During this arc we see him mostly stepping back and waiting to see what the family decides. However, may I point out, based on the way Don’s acted in the past when he sees people in trouble, especially if he feels responsible, I think we’d know if he thought what Leo was saying made any sense. His initial passivity towards the whole situation is, in a way, as loud and clear as Raph’s protests.

While Leo takes a utilitarian approach, Donny is looking at this as a Pacifist (he identifies himself as a Pacifist, I think he also explains in an intro or two that he’d rather find solutions besides fighting, also I’m basing this somewhat on Mirage Don because, 2003 is somewhat based on Mirage). His guiding principle is that you should never commit violence unless you’ve exhausted other options. Which, you know. It happens to them kind of a lot that they’ve exhausted other options. So I don’t imagine he’s real thrilled that in a rare moment of peace, Leo wants to go out and Find a fight.

But after Mikey talks to him we know that all three of them end up going after Leo, and ultimately all decide to fight alongside him.

This is one of my favorite Mikey and Donny moments tbh. With Leo off on his own and Raph siding with Splinter, Donny kinda has all the power in the familial politics in that moment. If he asked Mikey not to go after Leo, he wouldn’t. If he asked Raph to go—well, he did. I think Don mainly made that decision because he’s worried about what would happen to Leo if he’s alone. I think Mikey also played a big role though. Because even if he doesn’t agree with them ethically (and there really isn’t a simple answer they’re all right and they’re all wrong), he can see that it’s important to his brothers. If Donny has chosen to insist on staying, Mikey would have felt he had to because that’s the closest option he can have to his family being whole (hopefully Leo would come around), and thus he would be prevented from doing what he really believes in. If there’s anyone Donny would never put in that position no matter how much he disagrees with them, it’s Mikey.

And if there’s anything that could get through to Raph while he’s so frazzled over Leo fighting with him and determined to do what he believes is right (and he’s not wrong!), it’s a gentle suggestion from Donny (who he knows is on his side in this one) that even if they don’t get it, they should help if it’s really that important to Leo and Mikey.

But you know who is actually the only one who is able to change Raph’s mind? Like for real, not temporary placating him and inevitably leading towards another blow up (from him and Leo, Raph is not the only one losing his temper here)?

Master Splinter. Splinter, who has been very vocally on Raph’s side and against Leo on this issue. And whose teachings and rules so often clash uncomfortably with Raph’s personal values. Both of them are very aware that there is no end of Next Worse Guys, and that they have to prioritize their family’s safety because no one else in the world will. I honestly think that just as much as Splinter is the only one who could reach Raph, Raph is the only one who could change Splinter’s mind on this. I so wish we’d seen that conversation on screen. It would’ve been a great chance for Splinter to acknowledge some of his blind spots as a parent (so much of passing down fear), and for us to see Raph open and willing to accept his wisdom. Also Splinter helping Raph with his emotions. Literally the opportunity was right there. (Someday I’ll write it)

Anyway I’m sure Raph and Splinter talked about how they couldn’t stand idly. They agreed it wasn’t their fight to begin with, but Leo’s going anyway and you know what? Who really cares whose fault it was? If we can do some good let’s go out and do some good

(Again I don’t personally think going out to hit some more guys ultimately does that much good in the world and if I were the judge I’d be in the same page as Raph and Donny, about achieving peace by living peacefully and taking care of your people rather than by getting rid of the Problematic Guys, of whom the world will literally never run out, but that’s kind of what makes TMNT so compelling to me because they are trying so hard to live peacefully and keep getting pulled into these situations and fighting is the skill they have so of course it’s what they use and it’s really beautiful that they take such a an awful hand and try so hard to play as fairly as they can—)

I have to stop here or who knows where this could go

[datusaguy]

Before I see even more posts and comments talking about the Fionna and Cake finale, I wanna write down my initial impressions before I see too much more analysis. I watched the episodes last night right before going to sleep, but now it’s the morning for me so I may not remember everything as exactly but it’s still relatively fresh.

Overall, I did enjoy both episode 9 and 10, the show in general was quite enjoyable. I did feel like the ending was underwhelming when I had just watched it, but on further thought, I think it did wrap up satisfyingly.

I think I might have just had the wrong expectations going in. I recall seeing a post that said something to the effect of “Tom Kenny said episode 9 was the most emotional thing he’s ever recorded.” When watching the last 2 episodes though, I kept waiting for a really emotional moment, although it never came. I don’t know if I had misremembered what the quote from Tom Kenny was or maybe it was a bullshit quote or what, but I think I setup the wrong expectations for the episode.

Also, just in general I haven’t watched that many currently ongoing shows that don’t dump whole seasons at a time for a while. So when someone like Fionna and Cake comes along where I’m actually excited each week for a new pair of episodes, I’m not very used to tempering my expectations. I don’t think I hyped myself that much though.

Anyways, to the actual ending, here’s my thoughts for Simon and Fionna + Cake separately.

For Simon, I think just a bit more time to connect everything together at the end would’ve been nice, but I think I enjoyed it a lot overall. Betty really hammered in that Simon fucked up a lot by leading him to the Casper and Nova story. For a man who already hate himself a lot and has been planning to essentially “kill” the Simon part of himself via wearing the crown, it’s a strange thing for Betty to hammer in his mistakes. I think it works though with what Betty follows it up with.

Even after all the mistakes and pain in their relationship with Betty being GOLB now, she still enjoys her memories of Simon. She values him and doesn’t let him put on the crown. She also helps save Fionna and Cake’s world, thereby making any decision with the crown just for himself.

So Simon essentially gets to ask himself if he’s worthwhile. Does his life matter? Even with all the mistakes he’s made throughout his life though, the answer is yes. He’s not a perfect father for Marceline, but he got to see the alternative of him not being around. We also only got a little bit of Marceline in episode 2, but what we did see was her happy. Then there’s Betty who, despite everything, still cared for him and valued him. Then of course there’s Fionna and Cake who spend most of the show warming up to and caring for Simon. Also want to mention that while their bond isn’t great, Finn does also care for Simon and tries to help him out.

Simon starts off the show hating his life. By the end though, I think they came to a satisfying way for Simon to care for himself.

Then there’s Fionna and Cake. I do think their situation does parallel some of Simon’s stuff. Similar to how Simon feels, they’re all “mistakes,” especially Fionna. We start off seeing her struggles to keep a job and find happiness in her life. Then there’s the fact that her and Cake spend most of the show being chased by some god-like bug guy who wants to annihilate for being a “mistake.”

We also see them make mistakes in their journey to find the crown. Like the whole “attacking innocent candy people” thing definitely isn’t very great. Or them just watching BMO kill themselves. They also didn’t do great in helping the war against Vampires.

Despite their mistakes and flaws however with both themselves and their world, by the end, they still chose to stick by their world and make the most of it. Fionna and Cake have had each other the whole way through and they’ve made friends along the way in life like Gary and Simon.

My main problem is that I don’t feel like they did enough to show why Fionna and Cake still want to live in their normal world. While Fionna I think did have moments of “hey, I don’t think this whole magic and adventure thing is really for me,” I don’t feel like they focused that much on her alternative of living in her current world. That is until the very end of the show at which point, it felt rushed.

Edit: Thinking about it more, I do think there was quite a bit of Fionna and Cake realizing that a “magical world” isn’t the perfect solution to their problem. It wasn’t just a few moments of Fionna going “oh maybe this isn’t great.”

As much as I enjoyed seeing Marshall and Gary’s romance unfold, I think it could’ve helped to show flashbacks of Fionna and Cake instead. Those segments did help me get invested in their world and a lot of the show already helped make me invested in Fionna and Cake, but I didn’t feel invested in them being in their own world. So I think having flashbacks for Fionna and Cake instead would’ve helped connect them back to their world more to setup the finale better, while still taking the time to make us care for the world in general.

Anyways, I liked the show overall. I did enjoy the stories both overall and episode-by-episode. There was also some good laughs in there and I thought the presentation was really great. I remember first hearing about this show and not really being that interested as despite having watched all of Adventure Time (especially a lot when growing up), I felt content with what we had. So I’m somewhat surprised by how into Fionna and Cake I got. On the other hand though, I did wear a Jake hat for fucking years in elementary school partly because I loved Adventure Time so much so I guess it shouldn’t be that surprising.

[bingwriterxo]

Another analysis of chaper eight bing! I would like to start of by pointing out how I just love the idea of reader and Tara being glued at the hip😂 our girls are lucky they go to the same university. Reader being very dutifully to her classes and studying made me smile, she’s such a nerd. I love her to bits. There is something so intimate about studying in a library. Maybe that’s just my nerd talking. I knew the subject of Tara’s mother was going to come up eventually…but I will say I was surprised so soon. As soon as reader let the words out I will admit I was a bit taken back. I knew tara would get defensive and spew out words of anger…I knew it. As someone whose family is also not nearly the happy framed portrait picture I understand Tara wholeheartedly. My father and I sort of have the same relationship as tara and her mother. So it was easy for me to feel almost defensive to if that makes sense. But I also know reader, and her heart was in the right place. She’s such a good person she just wants her girlfriend to be happy. But some things in life are better left untouched. Especially if Tara’s mother is as neglectful as tara speaks of. I knew tara was going to spew words out about readers family, how perfect they are, how normal…how she had the world. What I did not expect was reader acting nervous and anxious…especially at Tara’s raised voice. My first thought was that slime on the bottom of my shoe Connor…but as we learned it was not. Reader leaving and tara grounding back to earth after she let her anger take over and realization hit her was definitely such a real and vivid moment. I cannot say how many times I have had that realization. Testament to your writing bing. Elder sister Sam coming in and picking up the pieces of a brewing tara was simply the best. I also enjoyed Sam practically yelling out readers name at the door 😂 reader acting timid and not sure what to do upon entering Tara’s room warmed my heart, she really is significant other material. I was not expecting reader to spew out the secrets that her family hold. But I will say….the apple Bing….THE APPLE. It might be my English lit in me but the subtle forshadow in chapter seven blew my mind!! Readers father seems like such a good man, I love him dearly, and was sad to hear about readers past familial issues. But I love how it makes her more relatable. She doesn’t let that one thing in her life get to her. Tara finding out that neither family is perfect was such a key moment. Because in reality no family is. No matter how hard one tries. Reader spewing out that “maybe our family will be” Nearly made me cry. I love how innocent it was, so full of hope. And Tara of course agreeing straight away. Such a Shakespeare moment in its finest. I cannot wait to see what you come up with bing. I’m currently trying to figure out why my asks are not going through, hence this anon. But just know I’m still here! I will always be a loyal scholar Bing. (Ps I love how Eddie caused chaos in the statue garden…I bet Nate was displeased)- Houseofwindsor77

my love, my dear, my houseofwindsor77 :D

i swear, even if R and Tara happened to not attend the same uni, they'd still manage to somehow be attached at the hip

tara was definitely extra defensive too considering the stress for finals week -- could make any sane person lose their mind fr

"slime on the bottom of my shoe" is such a real description for stinky man connor

R's father is a good man! now, at least. obviously, when she was a kid, he was out of it -- never showed up to things, always angry, always made her feel like she was wrong -- but he's there now, and he tries to make up for it by being a good father

tara and R forever fr, gonna have their perfect little family (of course, not really, but they can always dream)

oh, nate was so mad at Eddie for the statue garden prank, but he was just glad he didn't deface the shakespeare statue