#obey me child satan

[luxthestrange]

Incorrect quotes#714 Angy Baby...with facts

With the Morningstar Family...Before You came into the picture

Luci: I put a roof over your head clothes on your back, and food on the table!-

ChildSatan*Turns to look at him*AINT THAT WHAT YOU SUPPOSED TO DO! I'M YOUR CHILD!*Climbs onto a chair and then the table to be on eye level with lucifer*

The Four Brothers who were doing their own thing in the living room suddenly froze and buggy-eyed the small demon child...Mammon even tried to calm him down by bringing him down

ChildSatan: YOU HAD ME!? I DIDN'T ASK TO BE HERE!*Hisses at Lucifer as he clings to mammon*

In the human world

Mc*Wakes up*...I feel my child is in danger...-Wait I don't have a kid...

[ur-localsimp]

Obey me random quotes part 67

Lucifer: *in a meeting with Diavolo and some other demons* I’ve got to get back home before the kids realise I’m not there.

Meanwhile at HoL

Child!M!MC: *holding Baby!Satan and Child!Gn!MC* Mama?

Child!Nb!MC: *panicking since none of them have seen Lucifer all day* MAMA!?

Mammon: *standing there since he doesn’t know what to do* fu-

[maopll]

"Dearest...I think that's enough"

"No its not"

And there goes another few rounds where you smother your boyfriends face with tons of kisses. He brought you many lipsticks and lip gloss, so it is only right you try to see the shade that matches, right? the shade, which makes his face feel even more ethereal. The only correct way to let people know that you're his and he's yours.

"Hmm... I think this shade suits your face better!" You moved the ones which made his face look more delightful. Shades of pink, red, coral, and all.

He did say that the number of kisses you gave him till then were enough, but deep down, he craved more. The way your soft lips felt against his skin left him breathless. The way areas where your lips left left a tingling and burning sensation, which, rather than being unpleasant, was more exciting

What was even more addicting was the way you would gently cup his face with your hands and attack his face ferverently. This was best for both of you. You get to have the ego boost after smothering or rather painting his face with your kisses, and he gets access to your unlimited display of affection.

"There! Now that's more like it you look like my lover now" putting emphasis on the word, you were grinning from ear to ear while admiring your masterpiece. When you tried to get up from his lap though...

"Now now dearest I think it is my turn to get what I have been seeking"

— WRIOTHESLEY, lyney, NEUVILLETTE, ZHONGLI, diluc, CHILDE, AYATO, kaeya, alhaitham, VIL, MALLEUS, azul, leona, DAN HENG, blade, JING YUAN, luocha, dr ratio, GEPARD, DIAVOLO, MAMMON, lucifer, satan, BEELZEBUB

wanna join the taglist ? feel free !

© 2024 maopll. do not copy, repost or modify my work in any form

[enoe-of-noen]

M!Mc: *came home with a demon child in his arms, a stunned look on his face*

Satan: Uh…who’s that, dear?

M!Mc: …she wouldn’t leave me alone.

Child: …*smiles*

Satan: …why?

Child: Mama and papa didn’t want me anymore. Mc helped get me ice cream.

Satan: *looks over to Mc, bewildered*

M!Mc: I tried to give her to authorities but…

Satan: *sighs* Well, we can’t just keep her, can we?

Child and Mc: …

Satan: No-

Next

[galaxydestroyer165]

Normal day at the House of Lamentation

[angxlofvenus]

Hiii so I wanted to ask if you could write some headcanons about how the brothers would react if MC suddenly turned into a toddler (due to some forbidden book or Solomons cooking or whatever you want) like ,how would they react ,how would they take care of my ?

I hope this request makes sense ! I really like your writing

When You Become A Toddler

Thank you so much for the request! This was so cute to write about, Have a great rest of your day/night! Genre: Fluff Ship: Platonic brothers x reader TW: mentions of hurting Solomon, killing Solomon, Pretty much just threats on Solo's life, minimal cursing, eating Solomon's cooking, Turning into a child, Child reader

You should've known better by now... When Solomon brought you a Tupperware claiming it was Simeon's cooking, You knew it was risky but the food looked good! You only realized how badly you messed up after only one bite...

Lucifer

No. Not another one- He refuses

This man has pretty much raised 6 kids already, and while he may kill Solomon for this, He is the most experienced in helping you

He’s got this whole mom thing down to a T

Will probably just care for you like a normal Toddler

 It does get a teeny strenuous when he eventually needs to get back to work

No mc, you can not help him sign papers with your red Crayola crayon.

Once you’re back to normal, he’s mostly relieved, Though it was nice to reminisce on the good ol’ days when his brothers were still just young Cherubs

Mammon

First thought is, “Oh shit!”

Second thought is, “Lucifer’s gonna kill me!”

He may strangle Solomon right then and there

He is the second oldest so he’s got some experience under his belt

Immediately is picking you up and coddling you

Will totally become the best babysitter ever (aka letting you do pretty much whatever you want)

Wanna go spend Lucifer’s money? Hell yeah! Wanna go to the park? Let’s go!

Once you’re back to normal, He’s gonna deny Caring for you as closely as he did but he secretly enjoyed having someone younger around who actually likes him for a while (Luke…)

Levi

Nope, He can’t do this!!

Yes, He technically has 4 younger brothers, yes he knows how to take care of kids but still-

His room isn’t for kids, All of his precious collectibles!!

Is cursing the sorcerer's name

Y’all will end up watching some kid-friendly anime and playing some of his easier games

Will let you win too

After you’re back to normal, He will let out a sigh of relief, You weren’t a bad kid but, He likes you better grown up and not so destructive

Satan

As he is technically the youngest in age, He won’t be the most experienced

But- This man has read a couple things about kids so he isn’t totally helpless

Will be one of the better caretakers, He will keep you happy and calm throughout the day

He’ll find some more age-appropriate books to read to you 

Afterwards, He is happy you’re back to normal safely but it was nice to act so domestic for a bit, He will being having a ‘talk’ With Solomon :)

Asmo

Well, aren’t you cute!

Would also be a great babysitter in my opinion

Y’all will be having a fashion show, sorry I don’t make the rules

His phone is now full of pictures of just you and him being fashionistas 

Will 100% let you play with all his makeup and nail polish, Yes he’ll let you give him a makeover

No matter how bad the finished product looks, he will shower you in compliments on your skills

After you're back to normal, He’ll laugh about the situation with you and gush about how cute you were!

Beel

Now this guy is a family man so he’s immediately in protective mode

Will protect you with his life

Is maybe the best babysitter out of everyone

Will get everything you need, Blankets, coloring books, toys, You name it- He’s gonna get it for you

Will absolutely cook for you/ share his food if you ask nicely, He could never say no to that face!

Once you turn back, He is a little sad but overall just happy you’re healthy

He won’t let you anywhere near Solomon or his cooking for a while…

Belphie

Get somebody else to do it-

In all seriousness, he isn’t really good with kids

Will probably take you to the park or something so you can get all your energy out while he naps on a bench

Once y’all get back, He’ll give you his phone and just let you go wild while he sleeps

Will be nice enough to let you cuddle with him/ steal his cow pillow

He’ll be so happy when you’re back to normal, Not that you weren’t cute and all but he likes you better when you can care for yourself

He will definitely be out for blood though, Solomon isn’t going to get off that easily

Best babysitter to worst:

Beel Satan Lucifer Mammon  Asmo Levi belphie

[harunayuuka2060]

Teen MC: Uncle Luke! *hugging him*

Luke: Eh—

Simeon: *chuckles* Sorry, Luke. I think you weren't expecting that they would be a little bit taller than you.

Luke: Yes... Why does everyone have to be so tall...

Teen MC: Now that Uncle has mentioned that. *looking at him*

Teen MC: You're as short as I remembered. Do you never grow?

Luke: *blushes in embarrassment* H-Hey! Of course I will grow! *pouts*

Teen MC: Are you... sure?

Luke: *tries to sound stern* MC, I'm still your uncle.

Teen MC: ...

Teen MC: How tall are you exactly, Uncle?

Luke: MC!

Simeon: *chuckles* MC, stop teasing your Uncle Luke.

Luke: Hmph! I know you're making fun of me too, Simeon!

Simeon: Oh. I would never do that.

Teen MC: He certainly does.

Simeon: Hehe.

Luke: *pouts even more*

Teen MC: I'll help you carry your luggage, Uncle.

Luke: Thanks...

Simeon: MC? Can Papa ask you to prepare some drinks and snacks for us?

Teen MC: *nods* Yes. But Pa? Don't forget your doctor's appointment this afternoon.

Simeon: *smiles* Of course. Thank you for reminding me.

Simeon and Luke: *watch MC as they carry the luggage and goes to the room Luke is going to occupy*

Luke: ...

Luke: Simeon?

Simeon: Yes?

Luke: Why do you have a doctor's appointment?

Simeon: Oh. I've been having backpains lately. *chuckles* Maybe it's because I'm getting old and I'm starting to feel changes in my body.

Luke: Oh.

Luke: ...

Luke: Simeon, I know you've decided this a long time ago... But if given a chance, would you—

Simeon: No. I'm already satisfied with how things are.

Luke: I see. *smiles* I'm glad.

Satan: *helping MC to prepare snacks and drinks* How long is Luke going to stay here?

Teen MC: A few months. But I wish he would stay here for at least a year. I know how much he misses Papa.

Satan: ...

Satan: You should be cautious.

Teen MC: It'll be alright. I can trust uncle.

Satan: ...

Simeon: *showing his results to MC* See? Papa is completely healthy.

Teen MC: That's great, Pa.

Simeon: Does that mean we can go hiking? We can ask Luke and the others to join us.

Teen MC: Yes. But if I carry you, I'll carry you. No complaining.

Simeon: *sad frowns* However, Papa doesn't want to be a burden. *smiles* And I can still pull my weight.

Teen MC: It's not about pulling your own weight, Pa. I don't want you getting exhausted because of long walks.

Simeon: *chuckles* I can't argue with that.

Lucifer: *enters the room* Simeon? Barbatos would like to see you.

Simeon: Right now?

Lucifer: Yes.

Simeon: Okay. MC? Feel free to read any books you want. And oh! If you have any feedback, much better.

Teen MC: *nods*

Simeon: *smiles before leaving with Lucifer*

Teen MC: ...

Michael: ...

*One of MC's letters:

"I want to understand why my father turned into a human. Could it be because of me? If so, Uncle, please undo it or punish me in the same way."

Michael: ...

Michael: You're old enough to deserve a response.

Simeon: What is it, Barbatos?

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: Have you noticed anything about your child?

Simeon: No. I would say everything seems normal. Why? Is there a problem?

Barbatos: I am not certain. Though I have a wild guess that your child is in contact with your former brother Michael.

Simeon: ...

Simeon: Why would MC communicate with him?

Barbatos: MC was just a child when you chose to be a human, Simeon. It might be that they're seeking for answers.

Simeon: ...

Simeon: Maybe I've been worrying my child without knowing.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: *smiles* Your child is just like you, Simeon. Worrying over something they have no control of.

Barbatos: However, that's not our concern right now.

Simeon: ...

Simeon: I'll try asking my child. They would never keep a secret from me.

Teen MC: ...

*Michael's letter to them:

"Your existence stems from a deeply regrettable act, one that is unacceptable for an angel.

That's the explanation I could only provide you."

Teen MC: ...

Teen MC: *sigh* What could that be...

Teen MC: *is thinking of asking Simeon but they're unsure if they should*

Teen MC: ...

Teen MC: It's not the time yet.

Teen MC: I want Papa to trust me that I would be able to handle everything.

Teen MC: A few more years should be enough.

Teen MC: ...

Teen MC: But if I fail to wait for an answer... I want to at least have enough wisdom to understand the situation.

[devildomwriter]

Some spoilers in tags

[white-sinner]

obey me x eighth little brother reader

Welcome home little brother.. (3/?)

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"ok Mammon did you understand everything?"

"yes yes you don't need to tell me everything I have to remind you that I the great Mammon am the 2nd older brother you don't need to explain to me how to babysit"

Lucifer had an urgent errand to do with Diavolo and as Satan, Beel, Belphegor were out the only solution was to stay Y/N with Mammon as Asmodeus was busy with him he didn't know what but he didn't want to be disturbed and Levi was playing well all the day...

"That's exactly what worries me"

"HEY! Are you saying you don't trust me?"

"Exactly"

after Lucifer exits but not before threatening I meant to warn that if anything happened to Y/N he would be in serious trouble

"OK Y/N what do you want to do?, you will have to stay with me all day great"

"Can you read me this book please?"

"read? I thought we could do something more fun but alright-"

suddenly Mammon received a call and while Y / N he tried to get his attention Mammon said to wait for him in Y / N's room

after about 15 minutes Mammon still didn't show up so Y / N I started reading by himself until he saw a spider and well that little accident you can say was the death of Mammon

"aaaaaah!!!"

"OI! Y/N why are you screaming?"

Mammon saw Y/N cowering in the corner in his demon form trying to drive away the spider

"Y-Y/N are you okay?.."

Mammon saw his little brother with little candy blue horns similar to his and Levi's and a tail similar to Belphegor's and little black and blue wings

"Come with me"

"Levi, open the door now!"

"What's the password?"

"Levi! open this damned door or Lucifer will kill you and me"

"Mammon what have you been up to this time-"

Levi froze seeing Y/N crying in his demon form

"OH MY HELL MAMMON WHAT DID YOU DO WITH Y/N?!"

Asmodeus shouted

"I did not do anything!"

"you two calm down! first let's try to calm down Y/N who is crying and shaking"

after calling the other 3 brothers

"so you're telling me you heard Y/N scream and then found he like this?" said Satan

"Exactly"

"MAMMON!"

and then within him the death of Mammon Lucifer along with Diavolo and Barbatos

"I knew I shouldn't trust you I'll leave you to watch Y/N and you do this!"

"Ok let's try to calm down" Diavolo said "I think I understand the situation but could you explain it to me in detail to be sure?

after Mammon I explain everything again..

"ok at this point I think everything is clear" Devil said with a smile

"please can you tell what's happening to Y/N before Lucifer kills me!"

"simple Y/n is THE AVATAR OF PARANOIA practically all the most common fears of humans afflict him"

"Congratulations," Barbatos said with a smile

well that was how Y / N became the avatar of paranoia obviously thanks to the guidance of Lucifer he will learn to control his new powers and well for his fears you won't have to worry because he has 7 older brothers ready to protect and comfort him

Welcome Avatar of Paranoia/Fear~

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[immasock]

Could you please do platonic child mc with the obey me characters where mc is like Amane Momose from Milgram? Sorry if it’s an uncomfortable request!!

I apologize in advance, I hadn’t heard of her before this so it may not be accurate

Obey me boys + Amane Momose Child!MC

Pronouns: They/Them

MC was a fairly quiet child. Always with a small smile on their face and choosing to stay out of most of the regular drama that comes with being in the HoL

Actually, they were pretty calm. It was a nice change of pace from the normal chaos

Lucifer:

Lucifer was actually quite fond of the young child

They weren’t like his brothers

They were very calm and collected

Often one of the more mature people in the room

They were someone he didn’t need to worry about

It was refreshing

Sure he wasn’t a fan that he has a child to take care of

And given their young age and maturity level, he is a little concerned

But they’re a good kid and he isn’t too worried

Mammon:

Now don’t get me wrong

He loves the kid

Just like he loves Luke

But

To him

They seem a little strange

He never knows what they’re thinking

They’ve always got that smile on their face

It’s creepy

Plus they don’t really engage with his little schemes and plans

So

They’re not really all that fun

Won’t stop him from trying tho

Leviathan:

He actually doesn’t mind the little one

He’s not particularly worried about them causing chaos and breaking any of his collectibles because they kinda just sit in the corner

Really they don’t seem all that interested in his collection anyways

It’s not that they aren’t

They are

They just aren’t going crazy over it

They’ll gladly listen to him talk about it tho

I think him and this MC would get along

Satan:

Another one that is kind of fond of the child

They’re a good reading buddy for him if they’re into books

If they do like books, he is more than happy to lend his out to them

He knows that he’ll get them back in a timely manner and that they’ll be in good condition

Other than that, he appreciates their calm demeanor and matureness

He’s also a little confused by the smile they often wear

Not that they can’t smile

It’s just that he can’t remember the last time he saw them where they weren’t smiling

I feel like he might try and make it into some mystery to solve if he got bored enough

Asmodeus:

Honestly?

Eh

He loves the kid

Of course

He thinks they’re adorable and can’t wait to dress them up and take pictures and all that

If they let him of course

But

Like mammon

He thinks they’re a little boring

They kinda just stand in the corner and watch everything going on instead of being involved

I feel like him and mammon would try and bring them out of their shell

Now if that works is up to you but that’s just what I think

Beelzebub:

I feel like he couldn’t care less

At least in the beginning

Again

He loves the kid

And he’ll protect them with his life if necessary

But both him and this kid are so quiet and they both kinda stay in the corner

More so MC but still

However

I feel like as the year goes on

He would grow quite fond of MC

It’s nice to have someone that gets him, yknow?

Besides Belphie of course

I think their friendship would be adorable

Belphegor:

Straight up does not care at first

Appreciates that they’re not loud like his brothers and that they don’t bother him

Like Beel, he grows to like MC but at the beginning

Doesn’t give two fucks

I feel like he would like them more than he likes normal MC at the beginning at least

They stay out of his business and he stays out of theirs

Kind of

He does grow curious about them

Cause they’re weird, right?

Like what 12 year old is this quiet?

They don’t do anything

There’s gotta be something about them

He’s sure of it

But he’ll figure it out some other time

For now

It’s nap time

Diavolo:

Absolutely adores the kid

Of course

He’s just excited they’re here

Plus they don’t really cause any issues he needs to worry about

So bonus

Also thinks they’re a little boring and will 100% try and pull them out of their comfort zone to get them out of their shell

He absolutely would not know what to do with this kid at first

Like

He thought kids were supposed to like games and stuff

But this child is showing no interest in those things

He’ll figure it out eventually he’s sure

But until then

He’ll keep trying

Barbatos:

Big fan I feel like

Similarly to Lucifer, he likes how mature and calm they are

He’s more than happy to let them be

He understands that they like to keep to themselves and he can respect that

He may try and check on them every once in a while

But besides that

He’ll leave them be

I’m not really sure what else to say about Barb

He likes the kid

Solomon:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again

I do not trust this man around kids

I love him so much

He is my wife

But he will try his best to turn them into lab rats or some shit

Honestly he may succeed if someone doesn’t stop him

Someone will stop him

But still

I feel like he would view MC as something to figure out

Solomon, my beloved, leave the poor kid alone

Simeon:

Well

Right off the bat they have something in common

I think I read that they believe in god

So there’s that

I feel like the demon boys would either try and ignore it or would try and, not convert them, but maybe try and show them that Michael isn’t the good guy they think he is

Simeon also knows Michael isn’t a good guy but he’s less likely to try and tell MC that

I feel like MC may cling to the angels

Not really cling I suppose

But hang around them more often when they’re together

Just because they’re angels

Simeon respects MC and their choice to stay off to the side, observing everything instead

He may even join them honestly

He would absolutely base a character in his book off of them

Luke:

My son

I keep saying it but he’s just excited to have another kid around

He thinks they’re so cool

His human equivalent age is like 10 and this kid is supposed to be 12 I think so instantly it’s younger kid looking up to cool older kid

They’re so cool and quiet and calm and mysterious

Plus they love Michael?

He wants to be like them

For a bit at least

He would try but that doesn’t work out too well

He would keep trying tho

[meowsgirldrawing]

Obey Me Next Generation Idea(aka-My au)

What about poly Au with the bros? I assume with demon culture, MC having kids and the bros all being the dad wouldn't be too surprising as I think monogamous relationships are seen just the same as polyamorous. Like neither really matter honestly in a "oh this is a big deal/drama!" Sense.

Plus its the 7 lords, they can do whatever the fuck they want

I know MC is mostly human but I think having kids is still possible as they got magic plus their pacts with the bros might make them stronger. Plus, historically, woman have been able to have multiple pregnancies, like more than 4 at least, so still- not impossible.

Just let me have my next gen shenanigans

ONTO THE KIDS PLEASE AND THANK YOU

Varya (1st Born) (she/her)-25

Daughter of Mammon

Is more demon than human, possibly the most demon out of the kids.

Holds a very smiley but deadly aura around her.

Seems the opposite of Mammon in behavior but you can tell by her subtle acts towards her family, shes his kid alright.

Is the type of person to shake a person's hand but hold a knife in the other.

"Looks like a cinnamon roll, can kill you"

Lights up at the mentions of crocheting, dogs, and weird but oddly alluring creatures around Devildom.

She does have a small habit of gambling when out with Mammon, but is actually able to keep her wins because no one expects it through her gold-winning smile.

Mess with her family and its on sight.

Lilith the 2nd (3rd born-1st triplet) (she/her)-21

I headcannon Lucifer to at least be the only one to name their daughter after their sister. Not to replace, never, but to honor her.

Is in a strange middle between Half demon-mostly demon

Sweetheart by default

That big sister you can always talk to and she wont judge.

Will make passive agressive remarks when peeved off.

Definitely denies acting like Lucifer yet can do the stance-arms crossed and glare- exactly like him.

Even does the whole hand chest like him too. Shocked look and all.

Calls all the brothers papa but Lucifer father, not as a distance way but thats just how she's always been.

Theatre kid- almost always lead.

Anna from Frozen vibes at times.

Hopeless romantic too.

Basically Lucifer if he actually showed more emotions.

Daddy's girl 100%

May or may not be in a secret relationship with Diavolo's heir👀

Rhomb(2nd Born) (he/him)-23

Son of Leviathan

Named after the Loch ness Monster

A nice balance between human and demon

But has "mutations" that make him have scaly patches on his body, his tail out almost 24/7, and bad eyesight.

Stern attitude most of the time.

Big bro protector

Tallest of all the kids

Softer on the younger kids but will smack a bitch if they act up.

Cant play video games much cause eyes so turns to more physical games that include puzzles.

Likes games with strategy to follow like War tanks, or chess. Is the type to make a DnD game the best cause he makes amazing stories too despite not reading much.

Likes mystery shows too and tries to figure it out before the answer is revealed, could go on rants about why. Gets it right 11/10 times.

If Leviathan wasnt his biological dad, people would believe he was Satan's kid.

Doesnt like cats tho.

Quinn (4th Born- 2nd Triplet) (He/they/doesnt care) (21)

Asmo just thought Quinn was a pretty name so picked it lol.

Also a nice balance between human/demon. Tho his wings stay out constantly.

Very much vibes from that yellow bird in Rio.

Laid back personality but is an outgoing dude.

Also very protective of their siblings, and will not hesitate to cut a bitch.

Isnt as flamboyant as Asmo but does have a just as great fashion sense.

Has a hard time dating as people automatically assume hes just like Asmo so will try to date him for that reason only.

Love his dad but hates the reputation he gets because of being said son.

So he resorts to just sticking to his siblings or the few friends he trusts.

Besides MC, is the second most popular face to pop up on Asmo's Devilgram

Fucking adores axolotls for no particular reason, just loves them to no end which Asmo makes sure to get many axolotl themed plushes, shirts, etc. for him.

Libbey(Liberty) (5th Born- 3rd triplet)(she/her)-21

Another balance between human/demon, maybe a tad more on the demon side.

Tho, also has "mutations" like very enhanced hearing.

Bookworm to the max

Loves reading dramas and fantasies, but seems to enjoy multiseries more than stand alone.

Very quiet and shy kid of the group.

Sometimes cant even talk so signs instead because earaches or headaches.

Likes cats but perfers reptiles more.

Has a small turtle in her room from the human realm, set it up beside her bed and everything. Their name is Casey after one of her favorite human novels she read.

But despite all this, isnt called the daughter of wrath just for nothing beside biology reasons.

Is like Satan 2.0 when pissed, she wont yell or scream but you can just tell from the drop of room temperature and the subtle tilt of her head.

Her eyes glow an electric green when shes pissed.

Had more anger issues when younger, but cause Satan knew how to handle his better now, taught her how to aswell.

Satan is probably the main one to understand her issues with such a problem, despite being more mellowed out now that shes older.

Is definitely a cryer when really angry tho.

Ryder(6th Born) (1st twin)- 19

Ngl, everyone was surprised that they had twins. Including Belphie himself.

But then again, they did have triplets before them so....eh?

Ryder is a tad more human than demon, but still powerful enough to have his own demon form like his older siblings.

His tail is seen smaller than Belphie's, and a bit thinner too.

The sloth genes affact him only so much, making him more likely just want to procrastinate then outright not do anything.

He honestly enjoys the human world more than Devildom, mainly cause everything is less..hectic per say.

Hes the type of brother/older friend that will cover for ya if you have to hide something but will subtly suggest how to fix whatever their doing.

Like one time Quinn came home slightly tipsy and past curfew, and he snuck them into his room. Though he scolded them in the morning, he covered for Quinn at breakfast, saying they ate too much sugar last night, thats why hes queasy and has a headache.

Quinn did fix that habit up quick after Ryder threatened to leave him on his own next time it happened.

Calls everyone bro or dude, no matter their gender.

Gen z vibes too in most areas.

Has a fixation with cow bells for some reason, likes the noise is all he can say.

If he were told what Belphie did to their mom/human parent way before they were born, he says "Cowabummer" while screaming inside.

River(7th born-2nd twin)(they/them)-19

How is this Belphie's kid?

Too hyper, tad crazy

Probably has ADHD, who knows.

While Ryder is the slightly responsible twin, their the reason why Ryder needs to be said twin.

Their just about the same range of human/demon as Ryder, can have a demon form, but only uses it to fuck with people than to actually be scary with it.

They may have alot of power, but their personality alone can kill people.

Is the type of kid to crawl on the ceiling when they were 2.

Is also the type to hop outta window to get to the lower floor faster. Thank Belphie for their demon powers otherwise we'd have another Lillith situation.

Has scared even Lucifer at one point, has made him yelp out of surprise. Will not go on how, no matter how much Papa Satan and Belphie ask them. Just has a toothy grin when they ask.

When calm, is actually a pretty chill dude. They like odd patterns and get fixated on the most random things.

MC gave them one of those sand timers that you flip to restart and when she came down to tell them food was done about 2 hours later, she found them sitting on the table, holding it while watching the sand go down. They use it now to relax and focus on when overstimultated or just having too much of a fuzzy head.

Has spent nearly a how week with Leviathan because they got hooked on one anime with him. Now has frequent solo movie nights with him cause.

"They're tad confused, but got the spirit"

Literally had to have someone (Rhomb) explain to them what the LGBTQ+ letters meant. Legit thought it was just new alphabet pattern, was still happy to find out what it all means.

If you told them what Belphie did to their mom before they were born, they'd think it as a joke. Dont tell them otherwise or they will cry.

Frankie(8th Born)(She/her)-16

Everyone thought that she would be the biggest child when MC was pregnant with her, since y'know, it was confirmed Beel's kid.

Yeah, she came out small. Like scary small for a baby.

It was then everyone knew she would be the most human. Has a little demon in her, but clearly not enough to have a demon form nor mark.

Lucifer's wallet cried in relief.

She does eat a good bit more than the average human but overall, nothing compared to Beel.

She does adore sweets to the max, especially gummies. Give her some and she'll love you forever.

Sweetest little sunshine in the world, everyone adores her. If they dont, then they will soon.

Shes like Mirabel in encanto, kinda wishes she had more demon powers but is still overall happy with who she is.

When her a Beel are with each other- OH MY DIAVOLO, THE CAVITIES PEOPLE GET- TOO DAMN SWEET AND PURE

Like big papa Beel and his sweet little girl all smiley and pure. Best father-daughter relationship out of all the siblings and fathers.

Shes kinda like pinkie pie from MLP but like more hyper as fuck. Can and will speak so fast when excited that it just comes out as squeaks at that point.

Since her more human side, shes more likely to stay in human world when their mom is on Buisness there, so she has alot of human friends.

Shes in gymnastics, which definitely helps keep her figure more smaller despite all the sweets she eats. Does work out with Beel too.

Mess with her and you have a whole army on yer ass.

"Bounce to the beat of my own drum!"

You can just tell how much I love this dear. HA

[distressed-devilsitter]

Obey me! Period Headcannons

Wrote this at 2am the other day, waiting for the motrin to kick in. Enjoy!

TW: Gender neutral mc who has periods. Descriptions of blood, pain, and the reproductive system. Light vomit warning in Asmo's part.

As always, minors DNI 🔞.

Lucifer

Of course Lucifer knows what a period is. He was there when father designed humans, after all.

Periods, however, were not his idea.

Sadly, Lucifer was out voted when it came to designing the human reproductive system. Michael said something along the lines of "sin" and "punishment" but Lucifer had stopped listening at that point.

When Lucifer is informed that the exchange student menstruates, he pulls out all the stops.

The House of Lamentation is fully stocked with every period product imaginable. Pads, tampons, diva cups...

Lucifer's goal is to make your stay in the Devildom as comfortable as possible.

Lucifer deeply cares for you, but he's not great with emotions. If you have mood swings or, Diavolo forbid, cry, he'll cave to any demand.

7/10, he'll get you whatever you want on your period. Just pout a bit and he's yours.

Mammon

A w h a t

You have to sit Mammon down with an encyclopedia, several diagrams - the works. Mammon might have been around when Lucifer and father created humans, but that doesn't mean he was paying attention.

He has so many questions. This happens every month? There are cramps? It can be different colors? Indulge him, mc, he wants to learn!

Mammon becomes very concerned if you're in pain while menstruating. He'll push motrin into your hands and give you his heating pad.

From that moment on, Mammon keeps spare pads and ibuprofen in his bag. He'll give them out to anyone who needs it.

Wings? Extra long? Super absorbent? Whatever you need, Mammon is your guy!

10/10, we all need a Mammon in our lives.

Levi

His knowledge of the reproductive system comes entirely from anime.

While some shows are excellent at normalizing periods, other have...more questionable content.

As a result, Leviathan has some strange and vaguely outdated notions about periods.

For example, he'll treat you like Nightbringer Satan on the first few days of your period. He's hesitant to approach you, and leaves offerings of chocolate. It would be cute if it wasn't so insulting.

Sit this introvert down and have a heart-to-heart conversation with him. Be honest with how his behavior makes you feel, and he'll change his ways.

If that doesn't work, have him watch episode two of Please Tell Me! Galko-Chan. He'll shape up quickly.

5/10, most likely to believe that it's "that time of the month" whenever you're upset.

Satan

Satan knows what periods are, but his knowledge is purely theoretical. He's never been around a menstruating human before.

He ends up treating you like a science experiment. Depending on how close you are, he'll ask slightly invasive questions. How heavy is your flow today? How are your cramps? Here, MC try this herb, he's done some research and -

Is he feeding off your anger?

Wait. You know that look. It's the one Beel has when he sees food. How Belphie looks before he compells someone to slip into a dark, dreamless slumber.

Feel free to hand him over to Lucifer at this point. He'll hang in the HoL for so long, you'll start to think he's part of the decor.

If you're in a romantic relationship with him? The difference is night and day. He's ready with chocolates, extra pads, motrin...the works!

Either a 0/10 or a 10/10. How he treats you depends on your relationship.

Asmo

Asmodeus has been fucking humans since time immemorial. He knows what a period is and how the human reproductive system works.

He also probably has a few mini-mes running around, but that's neither here nor there.

Look, hun, he loves you, but he's not great with...bodily fluids. He'll pull back your hair if you vomit, but he will complain the entire time.

He's also a sympathy gagger. If you start, it sets him off and nobody wins.

Despite his shortcomings, Asmo will care for you in his own way. This includes copious amounts of skincare (you might feel awful, but he won't let you look awful) and making sure you get eight hours of sleep.

Yes, he'll complain if you stain his sheets (Those were skill, MC! Silk!) but he'll give you a fresh set of pjs and make sure you're comfortable before he does a load of laundry.

5/10, tries his best because he loves you, but is squicked out by the human reproductive system.

Beel

Doesn't know what a period is. Immediate asks if it's edible. (Oh, honey...)

He grimaces when you explain. You have horrible pain and bleed from your nether regions for a week straight? (Briefly, he wonders which angel thought this was an excellent way for humans to reproduce. He knows Lucifer was instrumental in helping father design homosapiens, but this is one idea he can't imagine his brother suggesting.)

By some miracle, Beel finds a period tracking app and downloads it on his phone. He'll keep track of your symptoms and remind you when your cycle is about to start.

Does Beel keep pads/tampons in his backpack in case you need them? Yes. Does he occasionally mistake them for food? Also yes.

He also keeps pain killers in his backpack in case you forget them. If you ask nicely, he'll even share his snacks with you!

Overall, 10/10, a sweet boy who tries hard to make sure you're comfortable.

Belphegor

For all his faults, Belphegor is well read. He knows what a period is but hasn't thought about it much...until he met you.

Another one who's not great with emotions. He loves you, but his first instinct is to out-brat you if your hormones have you on the war path.

He can't stand seeing you in pain. If your cramps are so bad that motrin can't help, he'll use his powers to coax you to sleep.

6/10, most likely to knock you out with his powers and have you sleep through the whole thing.

[ur-localsimp]

Obey me random quotes part 28

Child!M!MC: I think I know the answer Mr. Garrison!

Child!Nb!MC: Mememememe! *sticks their tongue out at him*

Child!M!MC: SHUT UP SHORT KID!

Child!Nb!MC: AYE DONT CALL ME SHORT YA FUCKING JEW!

Mr Garrison: Nb did you just say the f word!?

Child!Nb!MC: ….Jew?

Child!M!MC: No he’s talking about fuck! You can’t say fuck in school you fucking dumbass!

Mr Garrison: M!

Child!Nb!MC: Why the fuck not!?

Mr Garrison: Nb!

Child!Gn!MC: Dude you just said fuck again!

Mr Garrison: GN!

Child!Satan: Fuck

Mr Garrison: SATAN!!!

Child!Nb!MC: what’s the big deal? It doesn’t hurt anybody! FUCKFUCKITYFUCKFUCKFUCK!

Mr Garrison: HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE THE SCHOOL COUNSELLOR!?

Child!Nb!MC: How would you like to fucking die?

Class: *gasp*

Mr Garrison: What did you say!?

Child!Nb!MC: Oh I’m sorry I’m sorry.. what I said was.. *grabs a speakerphone* How. Would. You. Like. To. Fucking. Die. Mr Garrison?

Later

Lucifer: So who would like to explain why I got a phone call from the school saying you guys were cursing causing the teacher to quit his job?

Child!M!MC: It was Nb!

Child!Nb!MC:WHAT!? YOU STARTED IT!!

Child!M!MC: WELL YOU MOCKED ME!!

Child!Nb!MC: BECAUSE YOU SOUNDED STUPID!!

Child!M!MC: YOU CALLED ME A JEW!!

Child!Nb!MC: THATS BECAUSE YOU ARE!!

Child!M!MC: NO IM NOT!!

Child!Nb!MC: YES YOU ARE!!

Lucifer: Kids..

Child!Nb!MC+Child!M!MC: *yelling at each other*

Lucifer: ENOUGH! You two are always fighting over something stupid! Do you want me to hang you upside down from the ceiling again!?

Both of them: No..

Lucifer: then stop your bickering and go to your rooms!

Both of them: Yes lucifer..

[beelsnail777]

im never finishing this thing so.....

[enoe-of-noen]

In Lucifer’s office

Satan: I’m thinking of naming her something akin to Lucinda.

Lucifer: Luci…nda..

Satan: …wait,

Satan: NEVERMIND.

Lucifer: Crying

Satan: WHAT THE FUCK?!

Lucifer: You’d name your child after me?

Satan: NO.

Back at home

M!Mc: C’mon kid, just a quick bath! You reek!

Child: No! I don’t wanna!

M!Mc: Sighs

M!Mc: …hey, quick question for you, kiddo.

Child: ?

M!Mc: Could you think of a name you’d like to be called?

Child: ….

Prev / Next

[luxthestrange]

Incorrect quotes#743 Promises

Luci: Are you're STILL cranky with me?

ChildSatan: You said we could go to the library!

Luci: It was shut!

ChildSatan: You promised. And you shouldn't break your promise.

Luci:  Yeah, I know, kitty, but...

Mc*Shouting from the living room* Why is this kitten puzzle not tidied up?!

ChildSatan: Uh-oh!

Luci:  Quick! Hide!*Covers satan with his blankets*

Mc: Where is he?

Luci: Where's who?

Mc: The kid who broke his promise to clean up the kitten puzzle

Luci: Ohh! How interesting*Pulls the covers off the blond demon child*

ChildSatan: Argh!

Luci: Did Kitty break his promise?

ChildSatan: Well, you broke YOUR promise, so I can break mine!

Mc: What?

ChildBelph: It's true, Dad Luci broke his promise

Luci: The library was shut!

Mc: Seems like we've got a promising problem

ChildSatan & ChildBelph: Yeah!

Luci: OK, from now on, no one makes any more promises!

ChildBeel: But you promised you'd always love us!*Tears up hugging his burger pillow*

Luci: Whoa...I didn't think this through