#npd abuse isn’t real

[patricide-doll]

Narcissists absolutely rock. Hope you guys are ok and have a wonderful life. Sending love and high fives. Don’t let the stupid ableism get you down, you are all special and matter

[puppynarc]

NPD culture is being convinced that you’re the main character and that other people are just pawns,leading to struggling with lots of derealization and depersonalization because nothing is real.

I AM the main character of this story.

[a1ml8ss]

Jesus fucking Christ, this post is one of the most ableist things I’ve ever had the misfortune of reading, so I’m deciding to show anyone reading this that ‘Narcissistic abuse’ isn’t real. Abuse is, but this shitty, stigmatised term isn’t. By the way, I’m not going to be quoting most of this since it’s just the same old shit.

“Narcissistic abuse is a type of behavioral abuse that is perpetrated by individuals with NPD.” Someone with NPD being an abuser doesn’t mean that it needs a whole new term just to spout your ableist narrative. A person who abuses someone who happens to have NPD is just an abuser. It’s that simple.

“—this post is not intended to stigmatize or shame those who are struggling with the disorder.” And yet, that’s a contradiction because you are helping a stigma by posting this. Abuse and such topics are much more interesting to people, and the more you speak about this so called ‘NPD abuse’ the more you are pushing that stereotype because people are more likely to engage with this instead of actual information on NPD. You claim to not want to stigmatise and yet your whole account by the looks of it does just that. Stigmatise.

“It's crucial to recognize that abusive behavior can be exhibited by individuals with various mental health conditions, including Narcissistic Personality Disorder NPD, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), Antisocial Personality Disorder (APD), Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD), Schizoid Personality Disorder (SPD), and Dependent Personality Disorder (DPD). “ You are correct in saying people with various mental disorders can be abusers, but I want to highlight the fact you only mentioned already villainised disorders. Any person suffering from a disorder of any kind can be an abuser, a more accurate sentence would be “Anyone with any disorder can be an abuser.”, but no, you decide to use disorders that are already facing stigma which shows how genuinely hurtful and dangerous your misinformation is. (Also, I felt the need to correct the fact that the correct acronym for Antisocial Personality Disorder is ASPD, not APD, which again drills home how uneducated you are to be talking about this.)

“It's essential to approach these topics with empathy and understanding, rather than dismissing or minimizing the experiences of others.” Of course it is— obviously— but you are only listening to a victim. A lot of the time (not all of the time though, since some abusers are just monsters), abusers are a result of their surroundings. You claim to understand this earlier in the post, and yet you speak about people with NPD who are abusers as if they aren’t human, because you seem to refuse to think of them as human.

“Narcissistic abuse is a topic that is often shrouded in silence and stigma.” Yes, it is shrouded in stigma and silence because it is a stigma and should be kept silence because, say it with me now, Narcissistic abuse doesn’t exist. If this sentence read as “Abuse is a topic that is often shrouded in silence and stigma. Many people who have been affected by it may feel ashamed, guilty, or responsible for the abuse.” then I’d completely agree, but the fact that you feel the need to state that it was a narcissist that did this, like that makes it worse, then that say everything.

I’m not really going to bother with the rest of this, because it’d just you spouting the same hurtful ableism but here’s my conclusion. There is no need to state that your abuser was a narcissist. You could’ve talked about the affects of abuse and how it changes people, but no, you instead decide to help with the stigmatisation of people with NPD and playing it off as okay because you said you weren’t stigmatising it. Everyone’s experiences with abuse and such are always valid and victims should always be given empathy and support, but the fact that you choose to figuratively fund the false rhetoric of ‘NPD abuse’ being a real thing, thus making ableism against people with that disability worse, is horrific. Plain and simple, Narcissistic abuse doesn’t exist, the word you’re looking for, plain and simple is abuse. You are calling it NPD abuse because you want to make it sound worse because you believe that adding a personality disorder in front of a crime makes it sound worse and because you want to be ableist against people with NPD, at least to my knowledge.

By the way, I’m not going to tag this person. This was originally meant to be a comment on the post but I decided they didn’t deserve engagement. You can tag them if you want though, I don’t mind, their account is pumpkin-the-girlie-girl-vixen .

[thee-radio-host-is-a-kookaburra]

“actually narc abuse is real bc I’M cluster b and it actually DID make me abusive!”

um. that’s sounds like a you problem ngl…

[narcitism]

my abuser had brown hair im a victim of brunette abuse :(

[canadianlucifer]

June 1st is narcissistic abuse awareness day, which is why I'm here to say:

That's not a thing, just call it what it actually is.

"narcissistic abuse" is just abuse. It can be emotional, physical, any kind really, but defining it by the abuser's (potential) mental state is not only ableist and causes more harm than good, but doesn't accurately describe what happened and doesn't hold the abuser properly accountable. What is described as narcissistic abuse can be done by literally anybody, not just people with NPD. Please think about the words you're using.

Also, please stop calling random self-absorbed assholes narcissists, you are not their therapist. You cannot diagnose random tiktokers chasing clout with a complex personality disorder because they were rude.

[necroticcadaver]

I love talking about myself.

You ask me questions about myself? I could spend literal hours happily talking about me.

[ocpder]

Dear Narc Abuse Believers,

You aren't going to heal from your traumas until you stop blaming everybody's actions on narcissism and stop using NPD as a scapegoat. NPD has nothing to do with abuse, it is just a mental disability that you dislike the traits of.

Once you admit that your abuser abused you because they are abusive, you will start the healing process. You cannot blame abusive behavior on anything except for the abusive person, because they are the abuser, they have hurt you, a mental disorder did not. You are only hindering your healing from abuse when you blame it on things that are completely separate from it.

NPD is not the excuse. NPD is not the explanation. Abusers abuse because they are abusive.

[puppy-bugs]

Stop saying narcissistic when you mean abusive

[franknfurterstriangulardinosaur]

The thing is that if there was any positive resources for Personality Disorders, we would be able to get better. Instead, if we look up “narcissist help”, articles come up with “how to destroy a narcissist” and “they’re self absorbed, entitled and manipulative”. You look up your disorder and you just get things that articles on how other people can destroy your mental health, just because you have your condition, because of the trauma that caused you to have this personality disorder. It’s like they don’t want us to get better, they just want us to know how we’re horrible. They need people to demonise us, they want us to be destroyed. They make sure that everything hurts us. They expect us to recover then stigmatise the things we are trying to fix. That doesn’t convince us to get better, that convinces us to become the worst version of ourselves.

[purrfectdollie]

I taught my grandma about npd and now she won’t use the word “narcissist” as an insult anymore !!

[normystical]

pwNPD — What's your opinion on "NPD is the mental disorder and narcissist is to describe selfish people"? I tried pointing out the casual ableism in someone's sentence on Reddit but I got downvoted and told that it wasn't actually ableist for that reason.

[ghxst-system]

Abusive things we do as a system with NPD / As a narcissist

- Eat 3 meals a day, with snacks inbetween sometimes

-Play guitar pretty well

-Drink coffee cus its yummy

- If you cannot tell by this point, this post is a joke

NPD and narcissism do not create abuse. If someone is abusive, it is not for the reason of then being a narcissist. Narcissistic abuse is not a real thing- what people mean is: psychological abuse, emotional abuse, manipulation, etc.

If you looked at this post as someone who believes in narcissistic abuse, and then got disappointed that we are not a "self aware NPD sufferer" and instead are just some dudes in a brain... I hope you have the shitty day you deserve

[the-fallen-collective]

Daily reminder that people with npd aren’t bad. They aren’t abusive. Narcissistic abuse isn’t real. Narcissistic/narcissist is not a synonym for bad/abusive/stubborn/etc.

Can pwnpd be bad and abusive? Yes, everyone can. Is it because of the npd? NO!! “Narcissistic abuse” is fake, call it what is, emotional abuse!

I am so sick and tired of seeing it. I am tired of seeing narcism used as a synonym for bad/abusive people. I’m tired of seeing people in abusive situations default to calling their abuser a narcissist simply because they’re an abuser. Like sorry you’re going through that but also shut the fuck up with your stupid armchair diagnosis.

The next person I see who’s at all ableist towards anyone with npd I’m bashing their fucking head in with a rock and I deserve to because I am so much better than them in every way imaginable

[thee-radio-host-is-a-kookaburra]

Psychological abuse and emotional abuse are two words that have existed for forever to describe non-physical abuse. If you’re sooo convinced that you must label your abuse based on your partner valuing themself over you (which is like. present in nearly all types of abuse), even ‘self-centered abuse’ would be a better alternative. Y’all have so many options and yet you’re still confused when you get called ableist for choosing the ableist one.

[narcitism]

reblog to kiss a narcissist on the mouth (with passion)