#now off to your father you go
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I want Mizu’s father to be a complicated character.
I’m a sucker for reformed fathers and while I don’t think it will happen, I want Mizu’s father to be VERY morally grey. Give me a man who doesn’t believe in fairness or goodness anymore. Give me a man who had been through so goddamn much he can’t even see the kindness for what it is. A man who sells souls and bargains with demons and kills people with equal amount of interest. A man who doesn’t believe himself to be a god or melomaniac but simply a practical man who knows what he is and what he is not.
A man who knows he’s not good, and doesn’t dare to think he is, a man who has been broken once and put himself back together out of sheer force of will.
Man who, at his heart, still remains humble street rat.
Man who is friends with horrible people because deep down he doesn’t believe he deserves better ones. A pact brother to Fowler, who he matches in strength and brutality but not exactly in tastes or debauchery.
Give me a man who once had a goal, he reached it or failed it and now has to keep going, because he made a lot of people dependable on him. A man who keeps his people fed and safe but doesn’t tolerate the littlest bit of resistance or disloyalty because he fell for that once before and he’s still hurt. (Sounds familiar?)
Give us man who maybe had a son or two already but secretly wants a child that he could protect and maybe save and who deep deep down dreams of having a daughter he could spoil rotten. His little princess.
And then he meets Mizu’s mother and he either falls in love or he doesn’t but he suddenly has a goal again and he would be damned if he loses it. And he does lose it, either by having his daughter stolen from him and killing everyone responsible for it, or by thinking both his daughter and his woman were murdered.
Let us see his breaking point, him losing himself in cruelty once again, because he had just what he wanted in the palm of his hand and he threw it all away for a business trip or a seemingly important deal back in London, which turns out to be his biggest mistake.
And then give us a man who sees his daughter again but she’s not his little princess anymore. She never was.
Give us a man who is furious at what this world shaped his daughter to be. Who sees himself in her and he’s seething because he very much wanted her to be the opposite. To be happy and spoiled and loved. And Mizu is not.
She is ruthless, she is vary and she rarely sees kindness for what it is, especially in a foreign land. And she doesn’t trust him, even as he offers help in killing men that Fowler made her hate with his meddling. Men she suspects are either her father or the devil he works with.
Give me man trying desperately to make connection. Even as he bends the rules for her and breaks his own promises and lets himself care again.
And if it all fails and if she discovers he’s her father, he still tries to find a way to keep her. To protect her, shield her. Even if it’s by blackmail, even if he holds her friend’s lives in the palm of his hand as he offers her all the power he has. Even as she hates him with that reckless abandon we all know her to possess.
Give us a man who made a clan out of outlaws and makes Mizu his heir and their princess, as she screams and kicks and tries to get out of this position.
#Mizu the mafia princess#also give her brothers to compete with#or any halfsibling#give us a father that tries to step up but Mizu keeps breaking the ladder#and he is still a monster but he’s tamed#by Mizu who very much doesn’t need all this emotional bullshit#also Fowler bringing Mizu to her father who is neither of the man he mentioned before cause he knows she would kill him otherwise#here’s my crazy fucked up niece#now off to your father you go#I mean this very distinguished gentleman who totally will help you kill you father(s)#you’re welcome brother dearest#now take her off my hands and her sword off my neck pretty please#bes mizu#blue eyed samurai#Mizu father#Mizu father theory#my ramblings#also Mizu being his carbon copy in regards of revenge and inability to make friends would be the chefs kiss
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Bingqiu roleswap where disciple Shen Yuan knows he's gay, and figures out that he has a big huge crush on his handsome Shizun, but also concludes nearly at once that he's not going to be drawing Luo Binghe's eye any time soon. Firstly, Luo Binghe is notoriously straight. Secondly, even if he weren't, he wouldn't go for his scrawny untalented nerd of a disciple! Shen Yuan's not bad looking, not before or after transmigrating, but he's neither a beautiful nor a hot manly man, and he assumes if Luo Binghe were into dudes he'd be into the same kinds of twunks that Shen Yuan likes. Guys on his own level, etc etc.
Plus Luo Binghe hated the original disciple Shen, and only started to warm up to the transmigrated version after Shen Yuan got injured in front of him trying to stop the other disciples on the peak from killing a small animal. For some reason, Luo Binghe brought Shen Yuan medicine. He got even nicer after Shen Yuan distracted the skinner demon by trying to convince it to take his skin instead of Luo Binghe's, and then again when Shen Yuan successfully fought off a demon invader -- though initially when Luo Binghe volunteered him for that job, he thought it was an assassination attempt. His heart was in his throat when Luo Binghe nearly took a poisoned blow for him, but luckily he reacted more quickly and got hit by the thorns instead. His heavenly demon blood took care of the poison, and he managed to convince everyone that he narrowly avoided getting cut at all.
Shen Yuan's careful not to read anything into it when Luo Binghe finds out about his, erm, uncomfortable dormitory situation and moves him into the side room, or when he completely messes up trying to make dinner and Luo Binghe takes over cooking and bans him from the kitchen (he swears he's not actually that bad at cooking, he just never had to use a kitchen without a microwave or an electric hot plate before...)
After all, it's not like Luo Binghe is cooking for him, he's just making food he likes and letting Shen Yuan eat it too! Because he's nice! He's way nicer than the book gave him credit for being, see, clearly Shen Yuan was correct in signing up for his defense squad, "top ten worst villains of all time" his ass that poll was nonsense...
Unfortunately, though, the plot's still gotta plot. Shen Yuan is heartbroken when the Immortal Alliance Conference rolls around and his shizun stabs him and throws him down into the Endless Abyss. Heartbroken, but not surprised. After all, it was always going to go this way, wasn't it?
But at least, now that it's done, he has some agency in how he reacts to it. He's changed the story enough that he doesn't need to go get revenge. Maybe Luo Binghe's still the villain of his story, maybe that was inevitable, but some heroes let the villains get away. Don't they? It's all part of that noble, breaking the cycle of abuse type stuff. He can be that kind of hero. He can let it go. As long as he avoids Luo Binghe altogether, it should be fine, right? It's not like he's obligated to turn people into human sticks. He asked the system, he's definitely not!
Technically he's not even required to conquer the demon realms. He just has to get out of the Abyss and the be sufficiently cool and/or tragic. Conquest is just one means of doing that, and not even Shen Yuan's preferred, since he doesn't exactly want to rule over anybody. Going around the demon realms beating up some jackasses and rescuing some damsels in distress and becoming sworn brothers with Shang Qinghua, one of the current demon kings, is suitable. He definitely doesn't want to marry any of the damsels he encounters (thank fuck the system lets him off the hook for that!)
But eventually he has to go back to the human world. Not only is it mandated by the system, but he also misses living there. The demonic realms are in many ways better than expected, plus a lot of the monsters are really cool, but he misses the weather and plants and the people he's more accustomed to being around.
He misses Qing Jing Peak, if he's being honest with himself. Shizun's cooking and the bamboo forest and the crisp mountain breezes, the comforts of home.
Not that he can actually go back there in specific. Of course not. If he did that, Luo Binghe would try to kill him, or else the system would try and make him kill Luo Binghe. Bad ideas all around. No, he can't go back to Qing Jing Peak, but he can go find someplace nicer than the demon realms at least. He just has to keep a low profile, which shouldn't be hard since the original goods did that even while actively scheming to kill his former master!
Except.
Everywhere he goes, suddenly Luo Binghe is also there?!
Good thing Shen Yuan thought to take a page out of the book of Luo Binghe's actual love interest, Liu Mingyan, and start wearing a veil. He just didn't want any randos who might have seen him at the Immortal Alliance Conference or on any of the other missions his shizun sent him on to recognize him. But one minute he's investigating a strange case in Jinlan City, and the next the streets are full of Huan Hua cultivators (Shen Yuan has no intention of joining them, that's the path the original took to getting revenge! He doesn't want revenge!), and then Luo Binghe and Sect Leader MBJ and Peak Lord SHL show up, and SY is ducking down alleys and hiding behind columns, just trying to stay out of the way until the lockdown on Jinlan lifts and he can leave.
Except...
Luo Binghe really isn't acting like himself?
He looks like he hasn't been eating or sleeping well. There are dark circles around his eyes, and something almost melancholy in his countenance. And he's dressed entirely in white, none of the usual Qing Jing greens and blues anywhere to be seen. Of even greater concern, he's being reckless. Shen Yuan can't stop himself from rushing out when he sees his former shizun get infected by a sower demon.
Luckily, it's been some years since the last time they saw one another. Shen Yuan's gained a few inches in height, so he's almost at eye-level with his old master now, and though he's still more slender than bulky he's picked up some totally new styles from training the demon realms. He doesn't move the same way he used to. With that, plus the veil, it's enough for him to quickly swallow back his words as he grabs Luo Binghe and quickly administers a cure for the sower infection.
Well, he has one of course. He wouldn't need it himself, heavenly demon blood and all, but his time running around playing hero in the demon realms meant he rescued a lot of humans from such fates. Which is hard to do if you don't have a cure to their afflictions, but between him and Shang Qinghua, sourcing such things was almost easy.
Luo Binghe looks at him like he's just seen a ghost. The other Cang Qiong sect members are alarmed by SY suddenly accosting one of their own and of course find him suspicious, so he runs away right after, and then he has to lose Sha Hualing's pursuit in the city.
But what else could he do? He manages to evade the system's attempts to railroad him into meeting Gongyi Xiao, avoids the rest of the Cang Qiong crowd, and drops some of the cure through the current Qian Cao peak lord's window to get the incident sorted out. Then he flees and puts a good amount of distance between himself, Jinlan City, and every righteous sect he can think of.
The only problem is that after this point, Luo Binghe is everywhere.
Any time Shen Yuan stays in one place for longer than a few days, Qing Jing disciples start turning up. Any time he takes a job hunting some cool-sounding monster or pursuing some interesting tome of knowledge, the better to satisfy the system, it seems like Luo Binghe has selected and gone after the exact same target! Which is especially annoying because back when SY was a disciple, Luo Binghe was always assigning him to do this stuff. Since when does his chronic homebody master have an interesting in six-tailed scorpion lemurs or ancient spiritual kilns?
What's weirder, though, are the rumors.
It seems like any time SY stops at some well-populated place and asks for the latest gossip, he has to hear about how the Qing Jing peak lord lost his beloved disciple during the Immortal Alliance Conference, and mourned like a widow, and now wanders the earth in search of solace for his grief. Seeking something, possibly even the ghost of his dear disciple.
What nonsense! Luo Binghe threw SY into the Abyss himself. He had to do it, it was the plot! And also his obligation as a righteous cultivator, confronted with a "dangerous" half-demon. Does it sting? Yes it stings! That's why SY wouldn't just forget it! Despite logically knowing it's pointless, is there some part of him that wishes his master would have chosen differently? That thinks he should have known that no matter what kind of power Shen Yuan had, he would never use it to hurt people recklessly, or harm innocents, or especially not harm... well. It's pointless, his blood condemned him, and if there is some part of Luo Binghe which regrets what happened, it's doubtless just that he unwittingly harbored a monster for so long.
Which is fine and Shen Yuan would leave it at that, if the guy would just let him!
But no. Instead he has to deal with Luo Binghe turning up and asking him questions, trying to get him to talk (SY has no hope of disguising his voice, if he says anything he's not even sure it won't crack as he comes perilously close to tears instead, so he just stays silent), and then asking for his name, asking if he's mute, asking about his background, his sect, his kin. Is his a righteous cultivator? Where did he get that sword? (NOT Xin Mo, thanks, he used that thing once and then tossed it back into the Abyss before the portal finished closing behind him -- he knows a poisoned chalice when he sees one, although knowing the plot twist about that sword from the novel sure helped.) Where did he learn those forms? Is he... does he have a safe place to go home to? Someone to tend his injuries? Make sure he eats his meals?
SY, of course, stays silent. But it's difficult. Not only because Luo Binghe asks, but because he still looks... bad. Sunken, sorrowful, desperate almost. Shen Yuan can't figure out if he knows or not. Maybe he's unsure, maybe he's looking for SY to give him a sign, so that he can figure him out and then flip a switch and try to finish the job he started.
That can't happen. If they fight, SY will win, and he doesn't want to hurt Luo Binghe.
But even if Luo Binghe's not a heavenly demon, he is a highly accomplished cultivator, and it seems he's got his own breaking points to reach. Eventually he corners SY and gets a hand on his veil, and for a moment SY is sure he's going to rip it off, see his face, and confront him all "I knew it was you, you twisted evil demon, you won't escape justice a second time" and he feels a deep, icy terror close around his lungs--
Luo Binghe lets go of the veil before he can lift it.
But then something even worse happens. Because Shen Yuan's handsome, peerless, noble master breaks down. He falls to his knees, begging forgiveness, sobbing, clutching at his head like he's being driven to madness.
It all spills out of him, then. How he pushed his own dearest disciple into the Abyss, which obviously SY already knew, but also how he was apparently qi-deviating the whole time, and his senses could not differentiate between one kind of demonic "threat" and another. How he realized what he'd done only after he regained his senses hours later, and rushed back to the place where the tear to the Abyss had opened, but could not find a way in after the one he lost. How he had betrayed and thrown away the only person who cared about him, and couldn't even explain that he hadn't intended to. How he would accept anything, any punishment, hatred, penance, or revenge, if only he could see his disciple's face once more.
SY is stunned.
Apparently, Luo Binghe hadn't rejected him for his demon blood?
Not only that, but beforehand, he seemed to have valued Shen Yuan a lot more than Shen Yuan would have credited.
Is it a trick? Is he lying? SY would have guessed so, would have assumed that Luo Binghe's plan was to lull him into complacency only to turn on him once he finally had confirmation. But somehow, he just... doesn't think this is an insincere display. His old master is too cool for this stuff! He has too much dignity to just throw it away on a scheme! There are other ways to get what he wants.
Even if it is a lie, Shen Yuan is tired of running. He's the hero. He won't actually lose, and if it comes to it, it's still in his hands to decide if he wants to spare Luo Binghe or not (he does, of course he does, even if this whole spiel is an act). Plus he's got a backup plant body in one of Shang Qinghua's greenhouses if all goes to shit.
He takes the veil off himself.
Luo Binghe, teary-eyed, stares at him as if his face is the most beautiful he's ever seen.
Shen Yuan nearly puts the veil back on. His cheeks heat up. Dear Shizun, aren't you an immortal master? A noble peak lord? Isn't it your calling to vanquish demons? Get up off the dirty ground right this minute! Where did your dignity go? Shen Yuan did not spend all those nights doing the laundry to watch his teacher dirty his knees for no good reason!
There's a quaver in Luo Binghe's voice as he points out that Shen Yuan was terrible at doing laundry. Luo Binghe had to redo it the day after, all the time.
Shen Yuan chides at him that he should have made one of the other disciples do it then.
Luo Binghe just laughs, and stays on the ground, until finally Shen Yuan has to physically pull him up. Muttering about how he's being ridiculous, what's he crying for, why's he been moping so much, doesn't he know that handsome face should never look so bereft? Then he realizes what he's saying and shuts his mouth, but Luo Binghe just looks happy for the first time in years. Since the Abyss. How is it possible that SY, who actually had to slog through that awful place, can still smile more than Luo Binghe, who didn't?
They're standing so close. Holding on to one another. Almost as if... as if the scene's tone is... well...
Oh what the hell!
Shen Yuan closes the last little bit of distance between them, and kisses Luo Binghe.
#svsss#scum villain's self saving system#bingqiu#long post#of course the plot probably interferes further then#turns out that while luo binghe was desperately trying to get sy back he accidentally woke up sy's father#who for this au let's say is sj instead of tlj#sj does NOT approve of this match and also hates all the righteous cultivators (and demons... and everyone mostly...)#but he is also busy trying to resurrect yqy or something#kidnaps sy like well I missed the chance to raise you and actually that's probably for the best but now I need your blood#for Reasons#luo binghe is not a fan of this turn of events#reverse holy mausoleum arc when SY is mostly unconscious except to sometimes throw out advice and LBH is dodging traps and villains#the pining-over-the-dead-shizun arc is probably AFTER the holy mausoleum and lbh self-destructs to rescue sy from sj's plans#sy refuses to accept this outcome he decided luo binghe was NOT to die he didn't need a redemption arc he was FINE sy DECIDED#but luckily they're in the holy mausoleum so sy grabs a resurrection artifact of some kind#has to spend a few years restoring and maintaining lbh's corpse before he can get the to actually work but it's fine#he's fine everything's fine he's GOING to get lbh back lbh is NOT ALLOWED TO DIE#luckily unhinged sy results in way less collateral damage than unhinged lbh#so mostly he just fights off mbj's attempts to honorably recover his shidi's body and offer him a proper burial#while camping out in the holy mausoleum and arguing with sj's detached body parts#y'know normal healthy behavior
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*yeets this and runs*
My hand regrets my decision to try for more realistic wings, frankly
Transcriptions:
Mabel Pines - Steller's Jay
Dipper Pines - Blue Jay
fledglings
can't quite fly yet
wing's aren't adult-sized yet
Dipper often forgets to preen
Mabel likes to put glitter in her wings (and Dipper's, when possible)
Dipper collects his primaries to make quill pens
Mabel collects their feathers for crafting
Yeah so I'm just gonna drop this here and uhhhhh run, thanks for checking this, and I hope you have a good day
(program: krita; time taken: about 1 hr 45 minutes)
#eggin creatin'#dipper pines#mabel pines#gravity falls#first time drawing for gravity fallsa nd it's. it's a wing au. bro I've never drawn these characters before in my life but the VISION#they preen each other's wings your honor#they're gonna have tails btw I just. completely forgot them#basically with wings you get them from one parent or the other#twins often have the same kind of wings#not sure about the specifics as far as like. subspecies go#but anyway#dipper and mabel are both jays#their mother and father were probably jays#shermie was (is??) a raven his wife was a jay#ford and stan are magpies#filbrick was a magpie caryn was a raven#tldr the pines family consists of various corvids and that explains their penchant for trouble mischief and also family-motivated violence#hey fun fact magpies and some other corvids will teach their families to hate you if you upset them enough#just sayin man bill better stay dead#anyway yeah also mabel having steller's jay wings was solely because steller sounds like stellar#as in stars#and she's. well. shooting star and all that#as for dipper being a blue jay look man blue jays and pine trees they're just inseparable in my mind#there's something to be said about the stan twins and avarice/stubbornness/grudges I think and. magpies are kind of. stubborn critters#who also collect many shiny#and are oddly ride-or-die. also the aforementioned grudges#welcome to my au where all the explanation is in the tags#I'm just rambling now honestly#putting off actually watching gravity falls#yeah that's right folks it's wtst all over again I'm making stuff for a series I haven't watched/played yet!
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he still has his tonsils. by the way if you even care
#sorry this is fucking UNINTELLIGIBLE but unfortunately i’m still on my bullshit about dr. daddyissues. yeah it’s gonna be all month#i am rotating episode 2.8 ‘the mistake’ in my head at breakneck speed. i am gnawing on it i want to swallow it#oh he’s such a lying liar who lies. charming little bastard. would rather die/lose his license than express one wholly unaffected emotion#‘he thinks not giving a crap makes him like house. like it’s something to aspire to’ quick question HOW serious do the daddy issues have to#be before you start latching on to fucking GREGORY HOUSE as a paternal figure and role model. really#even cameron is not down this bad. even WILSON is not down this bad.#the daddy issues of it all are very understandable though because even setting aside whatever went down back in childhood that shit his#father did to him in seasons 1-2 is SO messed up. jesus#imagine traveling all the way across the world to the hospital your son works in for a consult which confirms what you already knew: you’re#going to die of cancer in like 2 months. making a whole point out of stopping by to visit your son. not telling him what’s going on.#letting him spend a whole episode’s worth of time gradually coming to terms with his complicated feelings towards you (complicated on#account of a whole childhood of objectively awful parenting). the kid finally is able to try reaching back out to you. after YOU initiated#the contact in the first place. how do you react? well obviously by telling him ‘oh sorry i actually have to get in a taxi right now’ and#fucking back off to the other side of the world without giving him a chance to actually talk to you at all and resolve any of the emotions#you just dredged up. oh by the way you still haven’t fucking told him you’re about to die and in fact actively mislead him into thinking#he’s going to have the chance to try meeting with you again next time he visits your home country.#especially fucked up given that the whole reason it DID take your son so long to come around THIS time is that he feels like every time#he’s tried reaching out to you in the past you’ve just disappointed him by refusing to put in the effort to meet him there.#And Now Here We Are Again.#rowan what the FUCK is wrong with you. i want to dig you up and kill you again#house md#robert chase#caseyposting
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THE BROTHERS SFORZA
augh. there sure is a lot going on between them. tfw you know your older brother is wary of you so you have to navigate that fine line of proving you're useful, but not dangerously so. tfw your younger brother has the potential to be a knife in your back, but he's your brother. don't think too hard about what happened with the galeazzo. unfortunately, you're both visconti as well as sforza, and the visconti were prone to conspiracy. fucking RIP.
this definitely won't be upsetting years down the line when ascanio is near death and ludovico will be desperate to figure out how to bring his brother's body back to milan so ascanio can be interred in the same place as ludovico's recently deceased wife, beatrice d'este, and where ludovico himself has been haunting in a perpetual state of grief.
& the background of the first panel are public domain scans of two cards out of the visconti-sforza tarot deck.
Ascanio Maria Sforza: la parabola politica di un cardinale-principe del Rinascimento, Marco Pellegrini
#ABSOLUTELY BANANAS PHRASING abt one of these paragraphs btw#'metafora della sottomissione del figlio al padre' okay!! like going into that dynamic with your older brother is so. sooooooooooooo#like it makes sense. this is a dynast family. the father is dead. the eldest son was assassinated.#so now your older brother who was not the eldest brother WOULD assume the father-head of household role#and in the case of an emergency. you would fall into place as his right hand#which was. which was formerly occupied by your mother. and your older sister to the assassinated brother. so. WELL#that IS how you would prove you were useful to the state-household. it's just that.#NOBILITY IS SO FUCKING INSULAR ALL THE TIME. christ#the claustrophobia of being suspicious of your brother but having to rely on him#better to follow the plan your parents and eldest brother had in mind and marry him off to the church#italian renaissance tag#ascanio sforza#ludovico sforza#komiks tag#drawing tag#anyway eventually i'll figure out an art style i like for the renaissance cast. i think im getting close#but AUGH im still missing that feeling of 'yes. good.' im leaning towards the dead lineweight tho. that feels Right.
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When it comes to Astarion's opinion on Durge choosing to reject or serve Bhaal, I'm always entertained by the dichotomy between this:
Astarion: "I don't know how you can beat him, but I do know this: you must try. The half-life of a mind-addled slave is worse than death - don't become his."
And this, when you actually chose service when given the choice between that or death (and Astarion approves of your choice):
Durge: "I'm sorry, I wasn't strong enough to stand against [Bhaal]." Astarion: "Servitude or death. You didn't have a choice." - Astarion: "If the only way to control his possession is to bow to it, I suppose that is how it must be."
And if you do reject him he clearly does not want to talk about it, for one or more of reasons.
So what I'm getting from these conversations is: Astarion: "You should do your best to avoid becoming your abusive dad's slave, servitude like that is worse than death." Durge: *dies* Astarion: "IT WAS A FIGURE OF SPEECH."
#And then there's:#“Ssh or I'll rush off and tell your Father you've been fibbing. Did he spank you growing up or go straight for the cat-o'-nine?”#Because he is an asshole (although there's a 99% chance he's not wrong with this response)#Considering that's for a Durge who has been obeying Bhaal's whims trying to claim that they won't really obey him now...#babbling#/durge#/astarion
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Is this fanfic friendly? I feel like an outlier.
I guess this is my sign it's time to throw together a FAQ post to link to lol.
Yes, every event for this blog is fanfic friendly :D
Though as I mentioned on my Ominous October post, for events that include multiple short stories, I encourage everyone to flex their creativity and take one of their planned short story fanfics, and at least *attempt* to turn one of them into something entirely original; rebuilding a character and story from the ground up to stand on its own two legs is no easy feat, and that is what makes it so fun!
It really gets your creative gears turning, to make an "au of an existing material" to be something entirely original, and you can be pleasantly surprised about the things you come up with!
As a few people say, its not just a matter of "filing the serial numbers off" -- you have to add in just as much *or more* as what you take out when you are turning a fanfiction into something that is original and completely divorced from its original source material / inspiration, and that is a hard, but very rewarding challenge!
Obviously, this is not a requirement (there's no hard requirements for any of the challenges, other than no cheating, including no using AI),
but if you would like an extra challenge for the short story events and you're planning on doing entirely fan-fiction, I highly recommend trying it out at least once, and seeing where it leads you--
you may find yourself pleasantly surprised by what you find down that rabbit hole!
#replies#novella november#long rambly tags to follow lol#including anti royalist / anti billionaire shit#ominous october#this is what my novella november is going to be#something that WAS a huge earth-shattering fanfic AU#but before I even got past a WIP Oneshot I'd already realized that what I was planning was going to turn canon so far on its head it would#be unrecognizable and it would be much better off and more coherent if I made it entirely original#so now it is!#not only does this involve changing every single characters name#everyone is now a completely different species other than human because thats always fun#and of course we're also tackling all the issues that had annoyed me in omega verse fics since I was like 14 and liked the#creature aspects but hated the biological essentialism and misogny / caste systems#if your fantasy people have an enforced caste system you gotta actually treat that like the horror and systemic oppression it is#not just say 'biological = right' like dude what do you think people have been saying about real women this whole time????#people literally insist women are biologically inferior to men do you really think supporting that idea is going to make you sound#progressive just because your main character is a tomboy independant woman?#also like she lost all her independence as soon as she found a man to marry so uhhhhh#what happened to being ready and willing to hit the bricks if people kept talking down to you and condescending you for being a woman????#why did you go from independant badass tomboy to fainting damsel who spends all her time worrying about failing to produce an heir#so her husband can take power#instead of just straight up telling your husband#'hey I don't want to deal with the bullshit from your father how about we do the-#- socially acceptable thing and just go off to make our own independant settlement with some of the villagers who are on your side'#like your husband would literally be escstatic about this idea of finally getting out from under his dad's tyrannical thumb#and its more like way more than half the villagers would go with you not just a handful#theyve been sick of the kings shit for years and only your husband's potential rise to rule kept them in check#cus he actually cares about the villagers and goes among them#while still clearly having some biases to work through when it comes to class and gender equality
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The more time I spend explaining Tolkien lore to my brother the more I realize that Tolkien was just batshit insane
#yes the world is flat and a globe at the same time#and yes if you go off the edge you fall into the void with Satan 1.0 (assuming the Straight Road doesn't just railroad you)#he calls Valinor “The place under some trees where everyone smokes weed” and honestly I wish they would do that instead#bilbo and frodo bring weed to valinor quick#i tried to explain the miriel-finwe situation and he's so confused#“so they died and they were all sad even though they didn't have to stay dead?? but she couldn't come back because he remarried??”#“but then he dies and says 'yo ill stay dead instead' and she's find now??”#does the big God just keep making elf and human souls or do they just. appear#i told him about Gil-Galad Son of Plothole#he is quickly realizing that yes#the valar are a bit incompetent#its fine#elrond's dad is a star his mom is a bird and his great great grandma is an angel#my sister gave up two seconds in despite sparking this by asking me about elf lore#apparently she actually just wants to know about legolas but not legolas' father because of the hobbit movies#let me rant about feanorian politics it'll be interesting i promise#shut up about your elf backflips you wanna hear about nirnaeth arnoediad and the kinslayings#tolkien#lotr#lord of the rings#silmarillion#the silm#is this a shitpost? idk#he's batshit insane but the world is great i love it#we still don't know where hobbits come from#they appeared one day#like potatoes#i had one tidbit of legolas lore and that was#the guy showed up several years late in a homemade boat with a dwarf#incomprehensible screaming
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"hes like a fine wine he gets better with age" "each day seems to get funnier each day seems to get stronger which i didnt think was possible" and other normal things these cats say about forsy like at this point this is our new normal
his fond smile as he realises its finally HIS turn to wax poetic about forsy hes been waiting so long for this
florida panthers @ buffalo sabres | 10.12.24 (x)
#evan rodrigues#gustav forsling#florida panthers#2425#“fine wine��� yeah mr classy magarita man youre gonna compare forsy to a fine wine#“seems to get funnier” i wonder what erod thought of his humour first coming here if he said that#is he getting used to forsys dry delivery now does he giggle along with everyone else does he giggle LOUDER now#“each day he seems to get stronger which i didnt think was possible”#and how has hes shown off that strength to the point youve noticed it everyday share with the class#did he push you around in practise like everyone else has roddy... be honest...#you ever realise when its time to praise forsy they will thirst over him but never fail to end the praise train with hes good people :)#GOOD FATHER#OUGHGHHHB COMING FROM EROD OUGJGJGJG#“theres not enough good things to say about him” he says as he attempts to#forsy love in my pantrs :]#you can tell how excited erod was he finally got the talking stick for thirsty over forsy comments#the way his eyes glance over to his stall too OUGHHHJ HE WAS EXCITED#man who did go FOR FINLANDIA FOR SWEDENNN in the parade does get excited to praise the nordics yeah
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the downside to being a sitcom neighbour sort of person is that when rough things happen and emotionally fuck u up a lil bit, it also sounds completely made up
#bert's dead dad tag#found out today the way my dad told mom he wanted a divorce?#he wrote her a letter and left it on the dining room table for her to find on the morning of her fortieth birthday#who the fuck does that dead father#like that is the sort of thing i would entirely make up if i needed everyone at the table to fuckin hate an npc#and at least one person would go 'you're laying it on a little bit heavy'#i know he did work to become a better person as he got older#which is good because BOY howdy was that man a piece of shit in the early 90s#and we are having Complicated feelings about it tonight and also for the last nine months#something something when i was writing his eulogy i came across an old article discussing something he did in the 90s#YDIP (your dad is problematic)#like yeah this is the sort of thing that would have been vaguely acceptable in the cultural context#but like. still objectively bad. potentially ruining several lives sort of bad.#learned this and then wrote the rest of his eulogy about how he was a great guy and how i'm lucky to have been his son#(which was rough enough on its own because i've never said 'i'm [dad's name]'s son' as many times as i did that trip home)#but like what else do you do? i sent off a message looking for more information#and that information if it comes is just gonna sit with me i guess#sure as hell not telling my sister and this whole thing i've been getting through without really having anyone here for me to talk to#(hence the big fuckoff tag rant. your problem now losers who like clicking the read more button)#so even if i get all the answers i want about this one thing it's not gonna do any good except putting an end to one question#but part of having a dead dad who's been out of the business of forming new memories since you came out is having more questions#answering this one's just gonna add even more questions to the pile#but. got fuckall else to do
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god i fucking hate my dad
#he came home today from a bike trip he went on and he's been arguing with me about honeybee the whole fucking day#he keeps saying just let her out let her run around! every time i put her in her pen to nap#and he refuses to stop her from biting him#and he got mad at her for playing with his socks when she'd just been playing with mine and he threw them on the floor of the living room#which first of all stop being such a fucking slob#and second of all what the fuck did you expect to happen? it's a soft new toy on the floor where she spends most of her time. where all her#toys are. very similar to the two soft items she's allowed to play with (my socks)#she's fucking 3 months old she doesn't understand the difference between my socks and his socks#and i keep telling him i know what im doing i was doing all the research while he went to buttfuck nowhere on his midlife crisis motorcycle#but he just wont fucking listen to me#and hes like oh youre at that age where you think youre right about everything and are so stubborn like fuck you actually#first of all im stubborn about this because its a living breathing puppy and his actions will affect her behaviour as an adult#and bc i know what im fucking doing. ive been an animal person my entire life. i did all the research. i did this exact same thing with#parrots for five years.#and hes like you cant just put her in her pen every time shes being a dog like no i fucking dont. i only put her in her pen when it's time#for a nap and she's getting overtired. you can't just let her run around until she collapses bc for one she never fucking will#second that's only going to make her energy threshold higher and then she'll be absolutely impossible to handle#and i told him that and that i read that on like every professional dog training source i read#and he said that might be true or might not be#like it fucking is bitch omfg#and then he tried to one up me like um i actually raised you guys for a long time i know what im doing#like a child is not a fucking dog. also my mom raised us lets be fucking serious. and look how well adjusted i turned out#and he told me to relax and calm down like i wasnt even arguing with him but i sure as hell will now#like dont tell me to fucking relax. when has telling anyone to relax ever made anything better. especially a teenager. especially a (for#simplicity's sake) woman.#and i told him dont tell me to relax and he got all pissy and stormed off#like literally fuck you#im my fathers daughter. im just as stubborn as he is.#rambles
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marc marquez letting an italian pass him at assen? *insert here a generic joke about rossi being mad*
had marc been a real hater he’d take off the wheels and win by 16 seconds riding only chassis after receiving a tyre pressure warning
a sequel to phillip island 2003, I like it conceptually
this is his problem. (giving him a pass this weekend, see you after the summer break.) he's not enough of a hater these days, he needs to find his way again... he needs to remember some of his best work is fuelled by spite... I remember his misano 2017 where he simply refused to lose that race after those italian fuckers had gotten his head hot... he knows this is how his brain works, he can channel this, he's seen the script... misano 2019, let's not forget, he'd just lost two back-to-back dramatic last lap duels... sure, he might have been walking the championship with insulting ease, but he still had something to prove... and what does he do? he stalks the yamaha riders on friday. in misano. he comes out on track during saturday qualifying ahead of dovi and valentino, decides to dawdle and let them past. and then he jumps on valentino's rear tyre. in misano. in the first year in which valentino just wasn't an on-track rival any more he had any real competitive reason to fuck with. but had the intention of using valentino to go faster. in misano
and then he gets super mad about the resulting drama and ends up snatching the win in the subsequent last lap duel against the rookie brat who is way harder to be a hater of!! that was proper hating, like that was a weekend long masterclass in hating. man touched down on italian soil and had a mission
anyway unfortunately I do think it's harder these days, like you can't just do that to any italian? what's he gonna do at assen, get all heated up when fighting diggia - a man I regularly forget does actually have a proper vr46 link now courtesy of riding for their team - for pee five? back in the day, he did have the decency to only ever finish behind an italian at assen when one of said italians was valentino (on three occasions, '13 '15 '17)... he used to show some respect for the narrative... but y'know some good old spite probably really would help him in weekends like that to keep it together a bit more. he's got to get something going with pecco for his own sake. in assen he probably never had the pace with all the spite in the world... next year, we'd better be cooking something special
#the FUNNIEST thing about misano 2019 is that valentino was deadass just minding his own business for once in his life#you can low key tell in his interviews afterwards where he's just kinda. stares at camera. it is what it is#valentino just being a sort of free spite dispenser for marc for much of his premier class time is funny but also feels like a cheat code#like god are you going to put any effort into creating your own feuds or are you just going to coast off this one for years? lazy#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#marc should've had two italians on the podium with him at assen 2018#but dovi randomly decided to become a terrorist for like half a minute and that was that#nobody needs to fact check this. i just have this vision in my head of dovi placing his bike in a creative place into turn one#this ask WAS responded to before saturday but there was a bunch of drafts i dozed off before getting out there... so just gonna dump now#btw i still think pecco might run off with assen next year lol. like he just clicks with that track!!#he does love some rossi speciality tracks but his father was Not racking up mugello or assen wins by big margins lol#average pecco mugello win: clears the field by five seconds. perfectly in control all weekend. leisurely sunday stroll. never in doubt#average valentino mugello win: Why Are There Claw Marks On Each Of The Podium Riders. Valentino Did You Try To Scratch Their Eyes Out#current tag
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sorry guys death must be present in my characters lives. i need some guys dead. doesn’t need to be literal and it’s fun when it’s not but nothing compares to an actual dead guy in your life. am i right?! ha!
#killing off blair’s brother was so fun. he wasn’t even dead at the beginning of the year. now he is. and that’s exactly how it works#claire’s father must go. i’ve killed hunt’s mother already#i’m sorry grief might be my favourite subject in the world#this sounds weird. i mean i’m writing. your perspective really shifts when death is all around you#in*
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God I'm so fucking annoyed how come she gets to treat me however she likes and then gets to say she didn't mean it?????
#have u considered not constantly comparing me to ur abusive husband who hit u??????#since i was like 8 its really fucking weird#like who in their right mind tells their child theyre naturally destructive just like their father and then says ohhhhh but i didnt mean it#are u fucking insane#doesnt help that i look like him too everyone tells me that#and now she acts like me raising my voice once means she needs to walk on eggshells around me wtf#what about how u treated me from ages 13-16#freak#i cant believe this shes treating me like im some scary stranger as if shes not the one with full financial control and that im this horribl#person go kill yourself omgjdjsjsjwjwwhwhhw#fuck u#last year was the worst year of my life and that was wholy bc of u you showed me what place i really have in this family and that it was not#hing. how is sveryrone so ready to throw me away??#yet everyone else gets to say shes sooo proetctive and loving fuck off you wouldnt even tell them youre treating me badly diedie diediediedi#i want to cut so bad bro#but i promised myself i wont so#i mean i dont even have any way of gettibg blades so whatver#just remembered her reaction to me cutting#nothing. yeah absolutely no reaction. i thought the worat thing that could happen was her gettjbg mad at me again but no#i realised there was somwthing worse. she just straight up doesnt care#useless mother#im fine w u treating me like shit ive accepeted it that i have no place in anyone's life unlesss i hive into this but at least#at least stop trying to confront me like this#just let me rot in peace#i really dont want to do this anymore#any time now she'll ask me if i was pretending to cry so i wpuldnt have to go out w her now#as if that isnt insulting#and then she'll say i wasnt trying to be rude!!! as if she hasnt always treated me like none of my feelings r real. i only ever overeact. ok
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using the tags to vent my current emotional state into the void bc ig story feels like a bad plan for this, read at your own risk.
#but jesus christ coming back home while already knee deep in a suicidal episode was an awful idea#like i was maybe on the verge of improving and then i came back to all of this family bullshit#and the place as well like it’s so. i don’t want to say isolated necessarily. but so much it’s own little bubble#and i spent the last eight or nine years i lived here depressed and the last six suicidal#and being back here feels like the actual place is telling me to die#and i don’t think it helps that every place i go i know or know of someone who successfully committed suicide#like. oh this person drowned themself here. or that person hung themself in these woods. or several people jumped off the side of this clif#like. it all feels like reminders of my failures. and it’s like. cmon. wouldn’t it be easy. all you need to do is jump. is slit your throat#is find a decent piece of rope. idk. but everything is so much and i just want it to stop and it feels like the ground itself#is giving me a way to do it.#i genuinely feel like i’m like 16 or 17 again. and everything that isn’t within these hills#feels like a haze and not actually real. like the concept of buxton doesn’t actually exist and my friends do not actually exist and nothing#actually exists except the place i’m in and my family and the pub#i think going back to work at the pub was a mistake; i think it’s making this worse. especially because it’s henry’s dad’s local#and where henry’s wake was. and nothing there has changed at all. it’s like the whole last year never happened.#and i only need to get through two more days but it feels like an impossible task and i keep thinking being back in york will fix me but id#if that even true like. i was suicidal before i left. and it’s going to be intense and stressful and then i have to leave again.#come back here and do three full weeks of this all over again. i haven’t even managed two yet this time around. and i feel like#such a failure and such a drain on my friends (and on one in particular) because it just#is so much and has been so long and everything is complicated and awful and i think if i hadn’t come back i’d be in a normal mental state#by now. that’s the worst fucking part. and also the whole thing of i know how to be suicidal here. i know how to not give a shit about#living here. i know how to do that. but ive never had to try before. like im trying to improve and im trying to hold on and hold off the#urges to kill myself or self harm or whatever because i said i would and because i KNOW it can be better than this and bc i love my friends#and they love me and i don’t want to upset them or make them anxious or anything like that and kat made me promise to try and im trying so#fucking hard and it feels like it’s not even worth the effort because it’s so much effort and everything is so overwhelming and awful and i#hate the way my family interacts and i just want everything to stop and idc if suicide is the cowards way out or selfish or whatever#bullshit people say it feels like the only option i can actually withstand because everything is so much pain and so much effort and so muc#everything and i can’t deal with it anymore. and also i forgot just how much i have to fucking mask in front of my parents and especially m#father and it’s so exhausting and i can’t sleep and there’s so much yelling and i just need it all to stop#i’ve had major breakdowns the last 3 nights about wanting to die so much & trying so hard to not let myself & idk how much longer i can tak
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"Would you like me to translate that? Or was it for me?" The show's thesis
#my theory is that by surrendering toranaga and everyone important ends up inside osaka and so do the weapons#penetrating osaka was the problem he said would make them lose. so now if they are inside 🤷🏻♀️ they can win#this is my design#cockroaches are cacarooch????? AJSHAKAJAKA#kakarooch??? closer to cucaracha idk where the cock came from to the englishmen#he's making her tea..... these intimate scenes go off so hard. now can he respect her and like value her as a person individually of#whose daughter she is??? the act is valued but lets take things along#YEAAAAH!! YOU TELL HIM!!!!! the bow right after to leave akdhaksjakw thats the diva i want#cry about it!! BOOHOO#anjin turning around omg.... he is ashamed of them i know akdjaksn#the cortisans beside the church akdhaksjdks#toranaga will make a little joke before he goes#NOOOOOO OLD MAN BREAK UP NOOOÒO#buntaro is going to kill toranaga.... he is fed up and his father wont let him kill himself his wife wont kill herself with him...#this people's 'i am going to kill myelf in front of you to change the trajectory of your life' game is STRONG#WHAT IS HE SO ANGRY ABOUT??? my guy!!!!#SEE HOW HE IS FAKING IT!!! HE WILL ATTACK!!! aure of my firts tag now lmao#thanking his son's ashes for some extra time.... insane#talking tag#watching shogun#YES I AM LIVE POSTING EVEN IF I SAID I WOULDNT!! THESE LAST EPISODES ARE TOO GOOD!! I HAVE THOTS!!
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