#not so much the cleaning but ill still take it

[lighthouseshepard]

you know whats funny about top surgery. i keep catching myself doing things my mind remembers but my body has already forgotten. like ill instinctively go to put the towel around my whole body instead of just my waist after a shower. i wake up and get dressed and a stray thought of muscle memory looks for a clean binder ill never have to wear again. i keep looking down and expecting to see something that isnt there and with every glance in the mirror i realize more and more that falling in love with your body is possible. i still have a ways to go but i dont believe i will ever take this pride in what i accomplished and the relief in feeling like my skin can finally be a home for granted. my posture is so much better. theres a lightness to the way i carry myself now that didn't exist before. the weight of a sense of wrongness doesnt sit on my shoulders, a tiny atlas in its own right. if youre thinking about top surgery but youre scared for whatever reason, i promise you the other side is better than you can imagine.

[lucygraysboy]

“that makes two of us.” lips pulling into small smile, still trying to break the walls of anger and hatred between them. though, he understands why she might not want to befriend the twin brother of the very man who’d hurt her and betrayed her trust. (it’s still so hard to believe that coriolanus’ capable of such things.) she’s letting him stay here and that’s a lot. “actually, everyone always said that i was more like my ma.” which is something that he takes great pride in to this day. she was an angel. “that’s great news. tigris. i remember this one doll that she had when we were little, how we’d play with it for hours.” well, coriolanus didn’t play with dolls, but they did. “does she live with grandma’am, too? that old hag,” billy adds, hoping to coax at least a chuckle out of the other, wondering if she’s ever met said old hag. “she never liked me, you know? did coriolanus ever tell you that? she never liked mom either, thought our father could have married someone better.” he feels awful for wishing ill on his own grandmother, but there’s never been much love between them.

“actually, you did attack me first. don’t know if you noticed but i didn’t fight back ‘cause i don’t beat up girls. and i never killed anybody, never lied to you. i don’t even know your name. well, i know your middle name is gray. what’s the first one?” he inquires, trying to change the subject because he can tell that she’s getting all worked up again and doesn’t want her to explode. “alright, let’s agree to disagree for now. but he meant a lot to you, didn’t he? sorry if i’m crossin’ the line here.” he lowers his gaze, focusing on cleaning the wounds on her feet. he takes another clean cloth and uses it to pat her skin dry. he can’t help but wonder if, beneath all these raggedy clothes, there might be other wounds and cuts festering. “is it just your feet that are hurt? what about your arms and legs?” he asks, dipping a fingertip in iodine and rubbing it into her flesh. his hands calloused and large, but tender and caring. it’s plain to see that she’s suffered enough. he doesn’t want to cause her any more pain. “again, i don’t kill people and you don’t have to fear me,” he sighs, looking up at her as his fingers pull a sock onto her left foot before moving onto the right one. 

“i wish i knew.” wishin’ she knew why so many born in the capitol are so heartless, tigris may be the only one that isn’t. “must be where you get it from, then.” his father. “tigris is alive, you should know…” the brunette mumbles, hands nervously raking through her damp curls. “well, that is rude cause i never attacked you first. you killed people, lied about who you killed, was goin’ to kill me. don’t act like you’re the innocent one here.” lucy gray bitterly speaks, brows creasing at him in anger. sounds like coriolanus lives beneath there, after all, it looks like. “i attacked you because you tried to shoot me a thousand times the last time we saw each other. ‘course i attacked you.” a scoff sounds from her, irritably watching him come closer. “i don’t mean anything to him. to you.” growing frustrated he almost keeps getting away with tricking her like he wants. it’s bizarre how alike he is to coriolanus but isn’t coriolanus. except, he is— cause that’s all a lie. “i won’t if you don’t try killin’ me first.” she mumbles, keeping her knife right behind her, sitting on it. saying that just to flinch when his hand wraps around her ankle, feeling like he’s trying to restrain her, capture her or something but realizing he’s just moving her foot to the water. what an even weirder image this is… coriolanus taking care of her blisters and weirdly caring about the state of her skin. staring and staring… trying to figure him out. different mannerisms, different hair color, different clothing. but the same face and the same hands with just more wear and tear to his callouses, probably all designed to throw her off guard like her mind is currently doing… spinning. peering into his eyes is what’s so haunting most of all.

[ashbyyyrose]

I WANT WHAT JEANINE AND LEOH HAVEEEE (i am in a very happy relationship and being dramatic)

[juniemunie]

Don't you have anything better to do?

Just let them go.

(Yes its based off that pic from Veil)

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ohhhhmygod im gonna be sick. actually nauseous and i did it to myself - there was a spider on the countertop and i Panicked, grabbing the first distance-killer i could grab. it was a grease cleaner spray. i buried it in the stuff, walked away to recover mentally, came back

it fucking fell apart and dissolved into the cleaner. i both feel horrible and im disgusted beyond words. how the fuck do i get rid of it

[karamazovanon]

some smerds

[hearteyespierce]

god the hits really don’t stop fucking coming do they.

[cryolyst]

~

[bulldagger-bait]

When it comes to hygiene tasks and self care with disability and chronic illness, its pretty much a constant case of: don't let perfect be the enemy of the good.

Basically: it's better to do something, than to do nothing at all.

TLDR: Just because you can't do something "properly" doesn't mean you shouldn't do it at all. Do it half-way. Do it shitty. Do it barely. Do it on a technicality. But do what you can. Just try, because doing something will help you.

If you don't have the energy to scrub your body with a sponge, just rub soap over your skin with your hands.

If you don't have the energy to wash your whole body with soap, just hit the places where sweat accumulates, or where you're smelliest.

If you don't have the energy to wash with soap AT ALL, just sitting in water is better than nothing. It will wash away dirt and oils.

If you can't bathe or shower at all, a warm wash cloth is your new best friend. If that's too much, then try bath wipes. They're a bit bigger than regular wet wipes, and a bit more heavy duty. They're designed to help keep bed ridden patients clean in hospitals.

If you don't have the energy to dry yourself after a bath or a shower, just put on a bathrobe and get into bed. If you don't have the energy to get dressed afterwards, just don't. It can wait until you can.

If you don't have energy to brush your teeth for two minutes, honestly, just a cursory scrub is better than not doing anything.

If you can't brush your teeth twice a day, brush in the evenings. It will help take away the build up of food from the day.

If you don't have the energy to brush AT ALL, honestly, just take a cloth and wipe the plaque off your teeth. Rinse with mouth wash after if you'd like. Something is always better than nothing.

If you can't floss twice a day. Try once. If that's too much, try a few times a week. If that's too much, try setting aside a day once a week as a goal. If you can't keep a schedule, do it when you're able to. Hell, I keep some floss next to my bed so that if I forget and don't have the energy to go get it, I can just reach over.

If you can't iron your clothes, don't bother. Wrinkles are fine. Wear jumpers over wrinkly t-shirts. No one will know, and honestly, most people won't even care. If it's really wrinkly and it's A Big Deal And It Needs To Be Ironed, here's my life hack. Step 1: take a spray bottle, and spritz the item of clothing (while you're wearing it is easiest) until it's lightly damp. Step 2: use a hair-dryer on the clothes until they're dry. It gets rid of creases like nobody's business, it's easier than lugging out the iron and ironing board, and you get to have nice toasty warm clothes afterwards.

If you can't fold your clothes, try just hanging them up. It's less commitment. It's quicker to do. Granted, you need to have the space in order to do this, but it is also good at helping you downsize, and lets you visualise exactly what you have.

If you can't put your clothes away, invest in a couple of laundry baskets, and then just keep your clean clothes in the baskets. You can then separate washed clothes into underwear, pants, and shirts baskets. You can just leave them like that. I'm giving you permission to never fold your laundry again if you can't. Just leave it unfolded. Who's going to care? Something is better than nothing. If you can, try to put those baskets into your closet so that you can keep the clutter out of sight, and give yourself a more restful environment.

If you can't separate your clothing out into different categories and wash them "properly" (whites, warm tones, cool tones, darks, delicates / switching between hot & cold washes / paying attention to laundry instructions on the label) then just don't worry about it. If you cold wash your clothes, colours won't bleed. Maybe gradually over the course of dozens of washes there'll be some changes in hue, but it's really not as high stakes as the One Red Sock In The Whites Turns Them Pink trope makes it out to be.

I've pretty much come to the point in my life where if a piece of clothing can't survive the washer and dryer, then it's just not meant to be. I colour separate my clothes, and if I have the energy/remember I'll take my bras and jumpers out of the washing machine to drip dry. But otherwise, I leave it to the universe.

If you can't separate out your recycling, then don't. If you have a large amount of rubbish you need to get rid of but the idea of separating it out properly is stopping you from doing so, then just don't worry about it. I know it's not ideal, but if you have garbage in your room/house and you need to get rid of it, please just get rid of it. Don't let the problem get bigger and harder to deal with. Don't let "doing something properly" get in the way of keeping your living spaces clean. Please. Give yourself understanding.

If you can't wash your dishes, get paper plates. Obviously, it's not ideal, but it is better that you eat food than skipping meals. It is better that you have a clean kitchen, rather than having dishes piling up and making it harder to look after yourself.

If you can't prepare meals for yourself keep making the tasks easier and easier. If you can't do recipes, then simplify. Use pasta sauce from the jar instead of making it. Eat canned soup. Buy food you can just stick in the oven. If you eat fish fingers and microwave veggies every night, it's better than not eating anything at all. It's better than having to fork out money on take-out. If you need ready-made meals, then get them. If you're literally just eating a raw cauliflower for dinner; 1) I see you, 2) me too, sis, 3) something is better than nothing.

These are the basic things you need to do every day to function as a person. They are your activities of daily living. Brushing your teeth. Bathing or showering. Using the bathroom. Getting dressed. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. Keeping your environment clean. You don't need to do these things perfectly, but they need to happen in order for you to have a decent quality of life.

And it breaks my heart, because I know that so many disabled people can't do these things every day. I'm not saying this to guilt or judge, I'm saying that these are basic needs; you deserve these things. These things bring dignity. If a disabled person is unable to do these things, it diminishes their quality of life. It robs them of dignity.

If you need help to do these things, Its okay to ask for help. It's okay to need help. But if you can't get that help and you have to do these things by yourself -- or you just plain want to be independent and do it without help-- then don't hold yourself to standards you can't meet.

Don't let perfect be the enemy of the good. Doing something is always better than doing nothing. Even if it's not perfect. Even if it's not done well. Do what you can.

[gay-fordeath]

.

[mars-ipan]

i do love my family very dearly but the internalized ableism the men in here struggle with is. so much

[arolesbianism]

I'm starting to see ppl talk abt updating their artfight pages and at first I was like what why it's still months away and then it hit me that by months it was two months and now I'm just silently sweating as my anual side project to remake the eternal gales refs and give them all icons comes back to haunt me

[tr0ubl3d-tr4n53nd3r]

I love how ride the cyclone went through 5 (or more) openings and decided to choose the worst one

[mifunebooty]

Happy one year anniversary to one of the biggest mental breakdowns of my life That made me see i have to start changing my life to better myself and my relationships with others by being responsible for my mental illness upkeep and stop living for others and live for me and now im taking film and theatre classes with a job on the side and have a short movie to my credit

[the-dragonlich]

I stayed up till 3 am cleaning last night and I don’t think my room has been this clean since I moved in

[lazymilkshakeyy]

got jumpscared by my friend asking to come over earlier and panic cleaned lmao

my room hasn’t been this clean in years