#not here for the writing hypocrisy
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I'm not explaining why re-imagining characters as POC is not the same as white-washing, here of all places should fucking understand.
#personal#delete later#no patrick. “black washing” is not as harmful as white washing.#come on guys get it together#seeing people in my reblogs talk about “reverse racism” and double standards is genuinely hypocrisy#say it with me: white washing is intrinsically tied to a historical and systematic erasure of poc figures literature and history.#it is an inherently destructive act that deplatforms underrepresented faces and voices#in favor of a light-skinned aesthetic hegemony#redesigning characters as poc is an act of dismantling symbols of whiteness in fiction in favor of diversification and reclamation#(note that i am talking about individual acts by individual artists as was the topic of this discourse. not on an industry-scale)#redesigning characters as poc is not tied to hundreds of years of systemic racism and abuse and power dynamics. that is a fact.#you are not replacing an underrepresented person with an oft-represented person. it is the opposite#if you feel threatened or upset or uncomfortable about this then sorry but you are not aware of how much more worse it is for poc#if representation is unequal then these acts cannot be equivalent. you can't point to an imbalanced scale and say they weigh the same#if you recognize that bipoc people are minorities then you should recognize that these two things are not the same#while i agree that “black washing” can lead to color-blind casting and writing the behavior here is on an individual level#a black artist drawing their favorite anime character as black because they feel a shared solidarity is not a threat to you#i mean. most anime characters are east asian and i as an east asian person certainly don't feel threatened or erased. neither should you.#there's much to be said about the politics of blackwashing (i don't even know if that's the right word for it)#but point standing. whitewashing is an inherently more destructive act. both through its history of maintaining power dynamics#and the simple fact that it's taking away from groups of people who have less to begin with#if you feel upset or uncomfortable about a fictional white character being redesigned as poc by an artist on twitter#i sincerely hope you're able to explore these feelings and find avenues to empathizing with poc who have had their figures#(both real and fictional) erased; buried; and replaced by white figures for hundreds of years#i sincerely hope you can understand the difference in motivations and connotations behind whitewashing and blackwashing#classic bixels “i'm not talking about this chat. i'm not” (puts my media studies major to use in the tags and talks the fuck outta it)
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You cannot claim to be anti-AI while still actively seeking out and using AI.
Once again.
You cannot claim to be anti-AI while still using generative AI, no matter the reason.
(Bold/italicized text: You cannot claim to be anti-AI while still using generative AI, no matter the reason.)
Even if you’re just using it to make fun of it or show how bad it is.
Even if it’s only for your personal use, and you don’t plan on sharing it with anyone.
Even if you’re “just” roleplaying on Character AI.
If you are willing to justify your usage of a system created and profiting off of stealing from artists and writers, a symstem that is destroying the Earth, then you were never as “against that system” as you think you were. Being anti-AI isn’t something that exists only in name. You can’t claim to be against AI if you are willing and able to use it as soon as it benefits you. You can’t say you’re for writers’ and artists’ rights if you’re using the very thing that is causing them harm. You can’t claim to care about climate change and saving the Earth if you are participating in the system that is destroying it.
There is no middle ground here.
There is no “Oh, but I-“.
If you have the knowledge of what generative AI is doing, of how it is hurting people, and you choose to use it anyway, you aren’t against it. You aren’t fighting against that system, you’re upholding it.
You can say how much you hate AI and how horrible you think it is, if you choose to use it anyway, then your actions and your words are not lining up, and the former reveals so much more than the latter.
Stop pretending like AI is something you can condemn only in name, while using it to your heart’s content in your free time. All it does it tells writers and artists that you don’t really care about us, and that any actions you claim to be taking to protect us are performative at best and lies or even outright malicious at worst.
You are—and I mean this in the kindest way possible, even with the fury that generative AI invokes in me—a complete and utter hypocrite. AI is not your friend. It is a tool, and it is a tool that steals from writers and artists in order to function. It is a tool that is using levels of energy and emitting amounts of polution in order to be maintained that are actively damaging the Earth. No matter how much you try to justify using it to yourself, that doesn’t change.
Stop hiding under the guise of being anti-AI while continuing to use it yourself.
#im not sure how many people on here are doing this#but there are a few people i know irl who have pretty much verbatim said to me how much they hate ai#and yet in the same breath justified their use of ai—particularly character ai—to me#so i figure its still worth it to point out anyway#hypocrisy is not cool folks!#it doesn’t make you look good it just makes you look like an asshole#i feel like this problem (of being anti ai and yet justifying its use) is the most prevalent in the use of character ai#because unfortunately i don’t think as many people are aware of how it steals from writers as people are of how ai art steals from artists#or if they are it seems as though the people ive seen talking about it simply do not care#if this made you angry maybe you should examine why you feel entitled to using something that steals from writers and artists#if you feel inclined to use ai#literally just do it yourself!#it doesnt have to be perfect or the best thing ever made#but the fact that you made it yourself makes it automatically infinity times better than any garbage ai could come up with#anti ai#fuck ai#fuck ai art#fuck ai writing#anti character ai#fuck character ai
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i think academics should be allowed twenty words per sentence and anything over that they have to pay per word
#<-post is twenty words long btw. just to give you a sense of how much they will be paying#who are they paying you ask? me personally.#i don't think this applies to non-academic writing btw i'm just talking about academics. i'm putting the box of commas on#a high shelf until they learn about periods#writing#my posts#semi-related i saw a post on here the other day in which someone was talking about some x number of words being too long#for a sentence but the sentence in which they said that was way over that x number. just found that hilarious#couldn't rb it because O! the hypocrisy of op but calling it out felt needlessly mean* so i'm just vaguing about it#*and also hypocritical from ME because i often write long sentences. but i generally try not to when directly talking about how#sentences should be shorter lolololol#i have some measure of short-term self-awareness#f
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naruto antis: naruto fighting to gain the respect of the same village that was the source of his pain is annoyingly bootlicking behaviour, this level of desperation is beyond me
(as sasuke stans, one of our biggest talking points is "it's actually not valid to hate on a character for reacting to their trauma in a way that displeases you")
#im gonna hold your hand when i say this...the jokes are writing themselves#im afraid you've missed the mark on this one guys#the hypocrisy 💀#ive seen takes like this so many times and i always giggle because?#aren't we? supposed to be preaching an entirely different message over here#??#there are definitely valid criticisms to be made but. im afraid this one ain't the slay you might think it is guys#after this behemoth of a meta im writing is done (it's 8k. so far.) im gonna write the lengthiest post on nart uzumaki i swear it#naruto uzumaki#pro naruto uzumaki#pro sasuke uchiha#<-if it's not clear already we are VERY pro sas in this household#these particular sasuke stans have the best political takes and i agree with them on everything#except their very uncharitable interpretation of naruto and his relationship with sas#sns#cuz everything is about them i fear
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....
#I don't usually write posts like this#But#Feeling so fandom sad today#Everywhere I look#Discourse discourse discourse#And it's not that I mind fandom critique#There should always be a place for it#But most discourse I see isn't critique#It's just factually inaccurate rage#Hypocrisy dressed up in preachers robes#As someone who usually traverses every corner of fandoms#Shipping and non shipping#Source material vs adaptation#M/M + F/F + M/F#You can see the big picture#And how people get lost in their own mythologies about fandom#And won't listen#I fear I'm going to have to start utilising the block button soon#And I hate blocking#Cutting an entire person from your life over one thing#When you could have myriad of othet things in common#Seems so damn stupid#But I'm so fed up#Anywho#Going to go play in the real world#Will probably feel better soon#Just grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr#Thank you for allowing me to vent#Hugs to my beloved tired mutuals who just come on here and do nothing but spread the joy#Windswept rambles
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you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.
you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.
so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.
you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.
you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.
you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.
you know you broke the rule by interacting.
but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.
#before i maybe get yelled at:#1) no i do not think ppl are evil for having men dnis no i do not think these are all equal transgressions even#though there is an overlap that should be examined that i think is based in a degree of lesbian separatism + exclusionism#2) yes there are lesbian blogs and people that are cool about genderfucky people. i'm not talking about them#3) this is a stylized vent post about trying to find lesbian content on tumblr that isn't like this. all these dnis/rules are ones i have#encountered. no i do not literally tell these people to change their dnis to suit me. the conversations are symbolic and ideological in#nature. if i find a blog with men dni i generally go somewhere else. it's about emotions. it's about my feelings on that it's not literally#about dming someone demanding they change things. it's not about demanding that You change things or else you're a bad person.#4) it is about the conflicts and hypocrisy and inconsistency of strict and exclusive sexuality labels persisting in gender-diverse spaces#and how it affects me as a lesbian who is a man who is a woman who is fucking whatever else. and yes it is about transphobia too.#5) it's about how lesbians feel the need to exclude men and how i think efforts to do so fail and hurt ppl and are often misguided#tht i think also comes up in like. bi lesbian/mspec lesbian/gaybian discourse. i'm not any of those myself but it seems like there's overla#6) if this post seems whiny and sad and insecure that's because it probably is. i have a right to be all of those things.#7) no i do not think all lesbians are man-hating assholes. i am a lesbian. i love lesbians. i love dykes and most of them are fantastic ppl#i just think the general bullshit of the world leads to this defensive thing that ends up hurting others in our community y'know?#8) i get that my perspective/experience is a bit unusual and many lovely ppl haven't considered it. that's part of why i'm sharing this#nyarla dni#<- sorry man it's too vulnerable. gonna keep this one to the internet-only folks#adding this wayy later but a crucial part of the experience i Almost talked about it this but never explicitly did was that like#the measures ppl take to 'defend against men' are often deeply transmisogynistic as well. obviously#and when i see that it hurts me too. not that it hits me the same way when strangers assume im a trans woman and hate me for it#but it doesn't feel good to see transphobia at all. i focused on how that relates to other kinds of transphobia#namely transandrophobia here but like. it's all connected. lesbain separatism + exclusionism relies on both and they aren't always#distinct experiences. ime. anyway trans ppl i love all of you forever#i just thought me writing “*turns to the camera* and trans women exp this too.' wouldve been too much even for this post#i figured the audience would like. know that. and so far it hasn't been an issue. i have not been yelled at thanks guys 🫶
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6k in and my head is about to explode. STILL not allowed to say what i want :(
#this fic is going to get negative notes i can already tell lmao#the scope of appeal is so stupidly narrow#but That Does Not Matter#i have to believe that#its for ME#its what i want to see and its what makes me happy#i will never put this in a real post because i would be immediately dragged into the square and burned for hypocrisy#but i think its worth saying#this is rasmr specific i dont know about any other fandoms so dont take this as a universal rule#if you go into your favourite tag variant (e.g. 'redacted [x character name]' or 'redacted [genre]')#and sort by 'top' rather than 'latest'#i would like you to scroll down until you find fic#by which i specifically mean PROSE - not bulletpoints or hcs or matchups or those sorts of things#(this is not to say that those things aren't good or worthy of respect - they ARE - but that's not what i'm talking about here)#i would like you to just think about how long it takes you to find a fic in there#because surprise! it's almost certainly longer than you would hope or indeed expect#now........ i wonder why that is?#i don't mean to sound egotistical or selfish or self-aggrandising through all this#but.... you know. fic writers - during their one life on this earth - put in an AWFUL lot of their real time and energy and love into this#into writing things for other people who they will never know or meet to enjoy for FREE on the internet#i don't think you can be surprised that it's a bit disheartening to do all that and then be met with basically silence#it's like cooking for people yk?#some fics are more complex/longer/time-intensive than others - in the way that making a five-course meal is more work than making a sandwic#but if someone made that food for you - whether it was a cookie or an entire christmas dinner - you'd still say thank you...... right?#you wouldn't just take it from them and leave the room - then eat it in total silence where they can't see - and then not say anything...?#if you liked it - or even if you didn't! - wouldn't you still say thank you? wouldn't you tell them that it was nice and you enjoyed it?#that you liked the ingredients they chose or the way they cooked it or the toppings they chose to put on it?#for the sake of everyone whose ever cooked you a meal i hope you would#because i'll tell you something for free - you will be scrolling on that tag for an uncomfortably long time. why is that?#because reblogs/comments/kudos/likes are to fic writers what 'thank you' is to a cook
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Also in the replies of the Steph concept art on twitter announcing she was gonna be in a new project at DC (posted by Travis Mercer), there were at least 3 comments saying "will Tim be there?" I don't care how hard you ship timsteph I'm exploding you with my eyeballs if you do that on my girls post again
#ramblings of a lunatic#taking a step back to acknowledge that my stanning may be getting overzealous#but then again I'm not in ppls quotes or replies I'm vagueing on an entirely different website with no relevant tags. it could be worse#anyway I know tims had it rough these past couple of months ever since zdarsky shifted focus of the batman title to have less tim#but it still feels. idk. just a wee bit uninspired to act like steph can't go two steps without tim being behind her#im ngl i like timsteph when they're cute but timsteph twitter has been. pissing me off a tad lately#the refusal to acknowledge the sexism in dixons robin run and how it impacts stephs writing and their relationships writing#the refusal to acknowledge tims occasional condescension and hypocrisy when it comes to stephs vigilantism#seemingly only wanting her to be spoiler when he wants her around and telling her to give it up most of the time#also the constant disrespect of stephs batgirl era on there weirdly enough?#I've harped on about this on main and in drafts but despite it's flaws it's a good turn for stephs character#she's the focus she gets development (an upward trajectory! which had previously been unheard of for her! bc she did have flaws as spoiler-#-its just that both writers and characters alike seemed to arbitrarily decide she didn't have the capacity to grow past them! but she did!)#hell i saw a BIZARRE take today i just have to bitch about#which was them saying that Batgirl was a ''heteronormative mask'' steph put on#with spoiler being her more authentic self (and this being paralleled to gender expression with stephs isolation from the batfam as spoiler-#-showing how she ''wasnt like them'')#which. I'm not denying you the view that spoiler has a certain genderific swag to her but the needless dragging of her batgirl persona#steph got treated badly as spoiler bc she was A Girl. it's genuinely that simple dixon felt batman and robin would never stand for a girl-#-running around doing the things they did and would need to chivalrously stop her. he's gone on record saying this#she's constantly getting belittled by mostly men (cass also dismisses her but it feels distinctly less gendered)#and in the end it's barbara who learns to give steph a second chance despite her mistakes and they have a positive relationship#something ppl are quick to dismiss as being in and of itself sexist bc they're pairing the two girls off together#as if batgirl isn't a legacy and as if babs and steph don't have parallels in their resilience and refusal to accept when ppl tell them no#for better and for worse!!#like. idk how you took the strongest feminist element in that comic (bc there are elements of sexism here and there! 2009 n all)#and somehow turn it into ''heteronormativity'' YOU PPL ARE JUST SAYING WORDS AT THIS POINT!!!#anyway. someone take away my internet access
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Elizabeth Lavenza has more personality and character in the actual text of Frankenstein (1818) then Henry Clerval but everyone ignores this because she committed the mortal sin of Being A Woman
#frankenstein#elizabeth lavenza#ONCE AGAIN. JUSTICE FOR MY GIRL#Now i love henry to the moon and back but what does the actual text tell us about hsi personality except that like.#he's a devoted friend. he likes to write. he likes nature. he's hot.#and his dad is anti education#meanwhile elizabeth is out here standing up in front of corrupt courts and calling out people not standing up for an innocent justine#and openly calls out the hypocrisy of the courts with the death penalty#& has an entire speech abt how justine's unfair trial completely shifted her world view from one of happiness to one of pessimism & violenc#also i'm talking abt 1818 frankenstein fuck 1831 i dont see it its not real. god bless.
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It kinda sucks how Optimus Prime is a character who people (in real life) expect to be so Indubitably Good All The Time that they immediately shut down and refuse to acknowledge him whenever he does bad things or fucks up. Like I don't think I've seen any other character in this fandom get the same instantly negative reaction/never talk about him ever treatment that IDW Optimus gets.
Like, it's either him being a cop or the annexation of Earth. But instead of actually engaging with the story and going "so how does being a cop affect the way he treats and is treated by others" or "what led Optimus to annex Earth and how is this a reflection of his ultimately heroic ideal to treat organics as equal to Cybertronians despite the historical racism of his species"
people just instantly shut down and go "oh he's an asshole, he's stupid, he's not my Optimus, he's a bastard, he's edgy" etc etc and refuse to even like fuckin talk about him
It's so incredibly childish lmao especially when the IDW1 continuity in particular is already rife with characters who are also assholes that do stupid/regrettable things but people have no problems talking about/analyzing their stories.
My kingdom for a fandom that's willing to talk about IDW Optimus without immediately shutting down and just going "he's bad he's a bastard he sucks"
#squiggposting#discourse#idw op love#it's very annoying and kind of why i don't try to talk about him as much as i used to#i'm kinda tired of bracing myself for negative reactions every time#and tired of the general fandom silence about him#worse than hating them ppl also seem to make an active effort to ignore or to erase him#and it's the spite of that. like it's one thing to just not be interested or not care#but it's another to actively shun and ignore and erase him#it's not even just the cop thing either. ppl refuse to engage with any idw op specific lore that isn't like....#idk his relationship with sen. SW? but that's for shipping purposes#of course ppl care about OP lore when it's time to ship him with someone else#but how many people care about IDW OP for who he actually is? hardly any#even w/ continuity soup people take out the cop part they dislike but they never try to write idw op's personality#so like it's not just cop hate. ppl just genuinely don't like idw op's personality or care about him in general#which i have to ask why the hell not because this is literally a feral and flawed prime that people keep saying they want#people keep saying they want an OP who isn't universally beloved and gets criticized for his hypocrisy and stuff#IDW OP IS RIGHT HERE WAITING FOR YOU TO ENJOY#ppl just genuinely can't stand the idea of an OP who's a real person and not just Inoffensive Fun Dad or Sad Woobie
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🎨,🦴, and 🪲 if you are willing! :))
Hi!! Thank you so much for sending me this, I truly appreciate it ❤️ 🎨 ⇢ link your favourite piece of fanart and explain why you like it I'm going to be super predictable here and share the cover for "The Knight's Pawn" that lovely @blackwatervial made for me during the KPTS Big Bang event. It's gorgeous and it brought me to tears with how much it conveys the general tone and characterization I wanted to present through my fic. Please go check it out, it's beautiful, I love it so much 🥹🥹🥹 Thank you again Lin for the millionth time 🥺 🦴 ⇢ is there a piece of media that inspires your writing? Hmm, that's a difficult question for me, because I only write fanfiction, so the piece of media that inspires me is, well, the piece of media I write fanfiction about haha. But, to truly answer the question in more general terms, music and poetry inspire me a lot, which is why sometimes my fics have lines in them that are a little more... melodic, I'd say. They have a rhythm, a pattern, they stick out a little from the rest. If my readers manage to distinguish them and, even better, like them, then I'm truly touched. (Sorry if my answer to this one is unsatisfying 😅) 🪲 ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here Hehe, I almost decided to add a few lines I'd written a few days ago, but you know what? Fine, I'm writing new words for this, why not?
One detail that had struck Vegas as odd had been how... clean the statue was. How the body had barely any marks on it. How the facial expression made Jesus look calm. Peaceful. Asleep. "Michelangelo wanted to portray the beauty of God through his work," his mother had told him. "That's why the body of Christ bears almost zero signs of what he went through." What a fool, Vegas thought, staring at the remnants of his cruelty on Pete's skin. His mouth was dry. His tongue tasted like sandpaper. There's no beauty to be found in suffering.
#I am aware I only had to write 50 words but I got inspired xoxo#so take a few more words I guess#I can feel the thing getting closer to being written but also not#I'll proceed to scream internally about it#while also laughing at the hypocrisy of Vegas here#I love the mess that is his mind so much#fanfic writing#ask game
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#nemesestext#I'll never get over the hypocrisy of people who shit on you for writing or reading rpf#like I’m over here making up fake scenarios with made up characters#who coincidentally have the same names and looks#meanwhile you're over there speculating#digging up personal info you have no right to know#who's the weird one here?
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#i just need to get this off my chest#but the hypocrisy of writing mainly dddne and r*pe stuff and then turning around#and saying you just can't stand bottom eddie and you think it's incredibly gross and shaming people for enjoying it#it is not lost on me#just like the irony of 'not to get into fandom top/bottom discourse but' and then IMMEDIATELY getting into it#jesus christ like just go touch some grass#don't like don't read also applies to you babes#just mute/block the tag if you're so bothered#people making a spectacle of themselves smh#anyways#i dont care about what this person writes i just despise hypocrisy#all of this is said as someone who tends to prefer sub bottom steve too#although i enjoy variety every once in a while#i absolutely will not say who this is about bc i am not here to blast them or start a hate wagon or whatever bc it is not that deep#i just really needed to vent#so yea dont ask#you wont get an answer
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In a statement that was shared with The Nation, a group of 25 HLR editors expressed their concerns about the decision. “At a time when the Law Review was facing a public intimidation and harassment campaign, the journal’s leadership intervened to stop publication,” they wrote. “The body of editors—none of whom are Palestinian—voted to sustain that decision. We are unaware of any other solicited piece that has been revoked by the Law Review in this way. “ When asked for comment, the leadership of the Harvard Law Review referred The Nation to a message posted on the journal’s website. “Like every academic journal, the Harvard Law Review has rigorous editorial processes governing how it solicits, evaluates, and determines when and whether to publish a piece…” the note began. ”Last week, the full body met and deliberated over whether to publish a particular Blog piece that had been solicited by two editors. A substantial majority voted not to proceed with publication.” Today, The Nation is sharing the piece that the Harvard Law Review refused to run. Some may claim that the invocation of genocide, especially in Gaza, is fraught. But does one have to wait for a genocide to be successfully completed to name it? This logic contributes to the politics of denial. When it comes to Gaza, there is a sense of moral hypocrisy that undergirds Western epistemological approaches, one which mutes the ability to name the violence inflicted upon Palestinians. But naming injustice is crucial to claiming justice. If the international community takes its crimes seriously, then the discussion about the unfolding genocide in Gaza is not a matter of mere semantics. The UN Genocide Convention defines the crime of genocide as certain acts “committed with the intent to destroy, in whole or in part, a national, ethnical, racial or religious group, as such.” These acts include “killing members of a protected group” or “causing serious bodily or mental harm” or “deliberately inflicting on the group conditions of life calculated to bring about its physical destruction in whole or in part.” Numerous statements made by top Israeli politicians affirm their intentions. There is a forming consensus among leading scholars in the field of genocide studies that “these statements could easily be construed as indicating a genocidal intent,” as Omer Bartov, an authority in the field, writes. More importantly, genocide is the material reality of Palestinians in Gaza: an entrapped, displaced, starved, water-deprived population of 2.3 million facing massive bombardments and a carnage in one of the most densely populated areas in the world. Over 11,000 people have already been killed. That is one person out of every 200 people in Gaza. Tens of thousands are injured, and over 45% of homes in Gaza have been destroyed. The United Nations Secretary General said that Gaza is becoming a “graveyard for children,” but a cessation of the carnage—a ceasefire—remains elusive. Israel continues to blatantly violate international law: dropping white phosphorus from the sky, dispersing death in all directions, shedding blood, shelling neighborhoods, striking schools, hospitals, and universities, bombing churches and mosques, wiping out families, and ethnically cleansing an entire region in both callous and systemic manner. What do you call this? The Center for Constitutional Rights issued a thorough, 44-page, factual and legal analysis, asserting that “there is a plausible and credible case that Israel is committing genocide against the Palestinian population in Gaza.” Raz Segal, a historian of the Holocaust and genocide studies, calls the situation in Gaza “a textbook case of Genocide unfolding in front of our eyes.”
#palestine#gaza#free palestine#end the the colonialism#end the occupation#harvard#harvard law review#genocide
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[0] 𝔭𝔯𝔬𝔩𝔬𝔤𝔲𝔢.
yandere!twst x (female) reader cw: yandere, unhealthy behaviors/relationship, non-consensual touching, power imbalance, abuse of power, descriptions of religious imagery, attempted non-con, hypocrisy, solitary confinement, rollo is immensely creepy, archaic mindsets and logic masterlist // prologue (you are here) // one
Without a shred of sympathy, discarded like dross, you are thrown before Father Flamme’s feet.
You have enough grace and dignity to resist the urge to grasp at his robes and beg for forgiveness. Instead, you condemn yourself to silence, allowing his piercing stare to stab through you with a judgment so precise it might just slice the skin from your skeleton. Your tongue darts out to wet your dry lips, and you can almost taste his disapproval, much like a snake might parse chemical witchery in the air.
“Lift your head, if you would,” he commands gently, and you do as you’re told. He folds his arms over his chest and looks on, cold as winter’s frost. You watch his finger tap out a soundless rhythm. “I must ask of you, Sister, to provide reason to your recent absences. As a child of God, you have taken oath to follow His wise teachings and devote yourself to serving this church. Am I wrong?”
“You speak wise and true.” You rise to your feet and, ignoring the brutes who so rudely cast you forward in the first place, bow your head in apology. Father Flamme waves them out without sparing so much as a second glance. “You are right that it is my duty to serve the church. I ought to be doing just that and yet I have failed to do so. Undeserving I may be, I ask that you pardon my negligence.”
Father Flamme hums. Standing in front of the altar, backdropped by a stained glass depiction of the crucifixion, he is bathed in a colorful, angelic array. He strides towards you, covering the short distance in just a few clicks, and places his hand upon your shoulder. You’re led from the steps and down the aisle. It feels more like you’re being brought away for slaughter, a lamb primed for punishment.
“There is no doubt you are genuine in all that you do,” he notes, sliding his hand down your arm. Those slender, spidery digits curl into your woolen sleeve. “You are impartial and well-bred, a woman of impressive patience and virtue. Qualities of which arouse an admiration most potent.”
You know the rest of your convent is much the same, which is why it puzzles you that Father Flamme should praise your humble name in such a sickeningly fond manner.
“You are too kind, Father,” you acquiesce. “As a modest servant of God, it’s my pleasure to devote myself to Him, the church, my fellow sisters, and the community.”
“Hmm. A laudable outlook.” His lips quirk up in a smile. Strangely, it looks sharp and predatory. It does not reach his eyes.
Father Flamme steers you in the direction of another stained glass window. This scene is of The Resurrection of Christ. You gaze at His face and wonder if there truly is something up there, watching over the world’s sheep as they live out cyclical days in their pastures.
Immediately, you realize you should commit yourself to writing lines to chase that doubtful notion away.
Father Flamme rests his hand on your other arm to hold you in place. “A quote paraphrased from the Gospel of Matthew, chapter twenty-two, verses thirty-six through thirty-eight, if you’ll listen: ‘When asked which is the great commandment of all in the law, Jesus would reply, ‘You shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment.’”
You nod mechanically, only half-listening. After observing you closely, he frowns.
“What troubles you, Sister?”
“It is hardly a burden worth shouldering. I assure you I’m of sound health. My recent habit of absence is most unbecoming of a sister. I should sooner confront the great shame of my actions than let it fester within.”
“There is still time to atone. You must seek counsel and, having taken it in your arms just as God embraces all, you will know forgiveness.”
You rest your hand upon Father Flamme’s, which has somehow found its home at your hip. “And how do you suppose I do that?”
He smiles that empty smile again. “If He is to provide for you, you must first lay yourself bare before him. I am no fool, Sister. There’s something you’re not telling me.”
“I have been truthful, Father. I would never lie under this sacred roof, nor would I have the gall to do so in your presence. It would be an offense so beastly I could not bear to let it weigh heavy on my heart.”
“Yet, rather than scorch your tongue with a dissolution of the truth, you evade the simplest of queries.” His fingers toy with the knots of your cincture. “What manner of tale will you spin to mystify me next?”
Reacting on instinct, you rip yourself from his immoral grasp. The nave is as silent as the grave, so stuffy it’s suffocating. Father Flamme narrows his eyes at you. His gaze cuts through you like blood swirling through the cracks in ice—like a scalding brand pressed onto flesh.
A thick tension blankets the air. You merely stare at him, and he levels you with the same calculating intensity. Both of you are searching the other’s face, hoping to find an explanation for such polar opposite behavior.
You’re courageous enough to break the quiet first.
“If it would please you, Father, I will graciously offer myself up for confession. There is no reason or need to circumvent the Lord.”
“Sister (Name), if you may spare the time, I entreat you to take a short stroll with me.” Before you can object, he offers his arm. “All children are lost lambs who will soon find their way when following the path illuminated by God’s brilliant light. You are no different. It is my duty to see that you are no longer led astray by temptation and the litany of filth propagated by the fiend.”
Sensing no other option, you link arms with him and subject yourself to his whims. “I’ve a frightful feeling. Most frightful indeed.”
“By all means, confide in God and trust that He will provide shelter. Under His sacred roof, He will lend an ear just as I am doing now.”
You inhale a steadying breath. At this moment, Father Flamme is all you have. In the depths of your heart, you’re aware he’ll never understand. He will never know the morbid secrets that dwell in darkened corners, swept expertly away. And if he knew, you would never be welcome in the church again. Your fellow sisters would certainly turn their noses up at you, loathing the sin of your very existence.
Even as you walk alongside the righteous bishop, you feel an overwhelming itchiness.
“Recent events have led me to believe—though I pray it isn’t true—that my heart has been possessed with a ghastly malady. Umbras waltz in my peripheral—no trick of the light, I assure!”
“Perhaps it is merely a case of wicked dreams?” he posits, leading you through the aisle like a father might accompany a bride on her wedding day. You shake your head insistently, and so he holds his hand up to soothe your frazzled disposition. “Peace, Sister. The songs of night are naught but whimsical folly weaved from the silk of zealous minds. You would do well to shake yourself free of their deceitful shroud.”
“I shall do so most ardently.”
“To rectify this trouble, might you consider attending evening mass? It can only do you good.”
You step up towards the altar, keeping pace with Father Flamme’s casual gait. “Oh, I couldn’t. As of late, I’ve felt uneasy in my solitude. I fear my shadow is not my own…”
His verdant eyes are so stark against the pallor of his face that it reminds you of coins placed over those of the dead. His arm slips away from your waist and, gathering your hands in his, he assesses you more carefully. Under the watchful stare of both Father Flamme and a crucified deity, you feel as if someone has taken a spoon to your soul and scraped it out. And then, for extra, unnecessary measure, they’ve flattened it out on a table for dissection in hopes of picking apart each of your dirtiest secrets.
“Oh? Do elucidate.”
Hazarding a glance at the cross situated grandly in multicolored glass, you lower your voice so as to not be heard by any outside parties. Paranoia grips you in a clenched fist.
“Something—what it may be, I could not begin to form ample conjecture—is hunting me.”
He does not grace you with a reply, and this only incenses the unrest bubbling within you.
“How say you, Father? What is it that causes me such nocturnal torment?”
His features are set in perfect neutrality; it’s impossible to glean any sort of emotion from the way he acts. He coaxes you closer, pulling you along towards the altar.
“It is with great devastation that I must behold you as you are,” he says, breaking the suspense. “Tainted with the despicable sins of the world outside, young and promising as you are… I shall remedy that.”
You open your mouth to voice concern, but in one swift motion he shoves you against the altar. You land with a thud, your back colliding against sturdy mahogany. It happens in a flash, like the final expulsion of breath from your lungs in the wake of the end. He’s between your flailing legs, pushing you up and onto the cloth-covered surface. Brass candlesticks scatter in a haphazard clatter. Globs of wax bespatter stone floors.
In the quaint tranquility of the church, the struggle is louder than a newborn’s cry.
Your chest heaves in a panic.
Gracious God above, I implore you—save me from this wretched devil!
Your pupils flit wildly, assessing every area within your range. There must be a means to escape! Above the ornate display, his head hung, your god looks on silently. He does not offer a whit of protection.
“Father—”
Frigid fingers crawl upon your legs like a flurry of scurrying rats. You blink up at him, helplessly hopeful.
He inhales a long, steadying breath and shuts his eyes. “God, have mercy. Have pity on this wayward soul. May she be cleansed beneath my fingertips, pure as freshly fallen snow, and may you forgive her every transgression.”
You sputter an incoherent noise.
He opens his eyes and smiles serenely. “Amen.”
Squirming beneath him, you resist his touch like it’s flickering flame. “Father, I beg of you… Quell your frustrations and release me at once. I am innocent.”
He sighs, unconvinced. “You are exquisitely venust, Sister. As sweet as the first buds of spring. You must know it is impossible for beauty to exist freely when there are fiends who wish to tarnish it—who will trample upon the virtuous garden in which you bloom and pluck you by the root, rough as barbarians. Thus, it is my duty to see that you are scrubbed of their detestable influence. May God pardon my iniquity.”
His hands slide up your calves beneath your habit. You watch, prickled with horror, as he parts your legs.
“Belle chose, unfurl your petals so that we may make feet for children’s stockings.”
He leans over you, reaching to secure your wrists with one hand. The other climbs higher in its rapacious pursuit of a place most sacred. In the midst of your ferocious thrashing, you espy His divine eye once more.
I adjure you, Lord… Save me from this demon. You must. Please, Lord…
Silence. A haunting, engulfing silence.
There is no salvation to be found beneath the cross. None for you, as it appears so disturbingly clear.
“Unhand me! Unhand me at once!” you snap, tearing your arm free. “You would allow yourself to fall lower than the ground you trod upon—to so flagrantly commit sacrilege in His hallowed home?!”
“It is not I who is to be scorned so. I am guiltless,” he sneers. But then he smooths his scowl into that of pristine, practiced patience, and he speaks in a soft, pitying tone. “Oh, Sister, you have allowed them to tip poison into your precious ears… Your perception is clouded with the cobwebs of that uncouth crowd.”
“To stand at his feet and reveal your malice in such a grotesque manner… You are no better than swine!”
“You shall see there is no better solace to be found than with me.” Tenderly, he fits his hand, cold and skeletal, in yours. “I shall shelter you from all that is cruel and unjust. You need only take my hand.” His fingers flicker at your inner thigh, waltzing in circles. His incessant petting sends a shudder wracking through your body. Paralyzed as you are, you recognize the monster lurking just beneath human flesh. A demented desire flashes in his eyes. You’ve never felt more lost. “And your sins shall be forgiven.”
Father Flamme leans down, chancing to catch the scent at your neck. You reach between your bodies, searching for the garter secured around your thigh, and unsheath the dagger from beneath your habit. It’s thrust at his throat, the sharpened edge pressed close enough to pierce through the collar of his alb and draw the slightest pinprick of blood. Clasping the ivory handle in a trembling fist, you face him with a fire burning in your fear-filled visage.
Perhaps it is his own disbelief that prompts the rattle in his chest—an ominous chuckle.
“You are a bride of Christ, yet you dare turn a blade on me?”
“You’re a man of God, yet you besmear His holy name with the sin of your incorrigible lust?”
“You are mistaken, Sister.” He grabs hold of your fist with both hands and folds his fingers over yours in mock prayer. As if intending to stoke your ire, he tilts his head in taunt. “Let my blood run red on this altar and you shall know of my humanity.”
“Defile the Lamb of God and you are no shepherd but, rather, the wolf who adorns himself in woolen mendacity.”
Before he can utter a response, the doors burst open. Father Flamme releases your hand and climbs off of you, brushing the wrinkles from his robes. An icy gale claws at the interior, and with it two men arrive in a whirlwind rush.
“Your Excellency, forgive our intrusion!”
Your arm falls to your side and, with a mounting sense of defeat, you gaze at the ceiling. You don’t feel soothed, but you must compose yourself. And so, shoving your frenzied emotions to the side, you sheath your blade and scramble to make yourself presentable once your feet are back on the floor. Brightening at the sight of the two villagers, you cradle your rosary and pray silently.
Dear God, may you smite he who spreads abhorrent rot with his fingertips and, in witnessing a most magnificent death flail, gralloch him without mercy.
“Ah, gentlemen, what fortuitous timing,” Father Flamme greets them, smiling. “Do come in. I’ve a task for you, if you would be so inclined.”
You linger behind, cautious like a gare-fowl often is when at the receiving end of a hunter’s rifle.
“Your Excellency, you need only ask and we are at your service.”
“Before that, you must accompany us to the hogs,” the other interjects. “Death has soiled these grounds, Your Excellency. A sight so barbarous it forebodes only the worst! You must come—come and behold the infernal darkness which has cursed this village!”
Father Flamme glances between the both of them, assessing the urgency of the situation that has been so cryptically illustrated.
“As you have described, the present circumstances appear dire. Oh, but I do require your assistance before that, gentlemen. It shan’t be too arduous a task.” He turns on his heel and indicates you with an outstretched hand. “Sister (Name) totters at the precipice with her fickle faith. As it is my duty to ensure all are well in the arms of God, I must take…caution—you might say—in sorting such a sensitive matter.”
The men exchange bewildered looks.
“You imply…punishment, sir?”
“Nay, I think not!” you interrupt, striding forwards. You’re stopped by Father Flamme’s arm, held just in front of your chest to keep you in place. “Father, I am steadfast in my faith. I have—”
“If such were the truth, you would not speak nullifidian filth.”
Pushing past him, you plead with the men: “Sirs, he knots his tongue and utters dishonesty! You know of my virtue—my loyalty to Him. And of my father, who has provided comfort and care, the means by which I was raised into the woman you see before you, I am justly proud. As the daughter of (Last Name), I sicken with the thought of bringing dishonor to my father, my faith—all of which I hold true in my heart. Sirs, you must believe in—”
Father Flamme lifts his hand to silence you, but you’re aware of his cunning machinations. “I ask of you this, good sirs. When sailors set out at sea, do they allow themselves to fall prey to the song of the siren? Just as those wretched sea-beasts sing, so, too, does honey pour spoiled from the mouth of a sinner. Her words serve to chart a course for ill-founded temptation.”
“Sister, your virtue I do not question.” The villager addresses Father Flamme next, disregarding your presence entirely, as if you are naught but a worthless speck. “What shall we do, Your Excellency?”
A smile curls on his lips. “Take her to the tower just beyond the village. She shall remain in solitude for seven days. That shall provide her with ample time for contemplation.”
The men approach you without a hint of remorse on their lips. Cornered, you look to Father Flamme for guidance.
“Father, I beg of you—you mustn’t send me away! I shall repent! I shall do so before you now.”
“It serves me no satisfaction to subject you to solitary confinement.” He folds his hands in front of him and observes the spectacle of your resistance. “You have proven to me your doubt in the capabilities of the Lord. It is my right to correct your contumacious thoughts. I’m certain your father would share this sentiment. No daughter should empty her mind of His valuable teachings.”
“Do not speak as if you have dined with my father,” you hiss, wriggling in the firm hold of both men.
Father Flamme steps closer and smiles. “Let us away.”
You are dragged, struggling all the while, out of the church and down the steps. There is a ferocious bite to this year’s autumnal weather. Father Flamme is gracious enough to drape his cloak over your shoulders just before you’re lifted onto a horse. He mounts his stallion and, with the crack of a whip, the four of you are off towards the decrepit tower at the rugged foothills of the mountains. No words are exchanged. You’ve said more than enough and you still remain the accused, guilty due to distorted logic.
The tower, which had once appeared so distantly out of your mind, gains striking clarity as you approach. You gaze helplessly at the man transporting you. He offers nothing of substance, his gaze focused squarely on the dirt footpath ahead.
When you were but a babe, the tower served as a warning for all children in the village: Those whose souls are stained with the sins of their atrocities shall wither away in silence.
There was once a raving madman who was imprisoned there in your youth. A heretic, he was called. Driven to his end, his sanity thin as a hair, he scraped at the walls and pulled loose bricks free until his fingernails cracked and blood trickled down his hands in rivers. When he had created a sizable opening for himself, at the peak of his derangement, he climbed out to meet the sun’s soft rays, a singular blessing owed for years of captivity. And then he threw himself from the tower, landing in a broken spattering at the very bottom.
In the years following, the tower housed numerous prisoners. It is a cold, unforgiving place, existing solely for the ugly and the crooked. And, now, the misunderstood. The wrongfully accused.
As you’re helped down from the horse, you ponder how many have been sent here to live out time for unfair accusations.
You’re joined by the second villager shortly, and they flank you like soldiers as they shove you along.
“Have you no sympathy, sirs!” you snap, shaking yourself from their grip. “To treat me so callously when my devotion is fervent and true! I am no fabulist.”
The men say nothing and amble onwards, pushing you closer to the tower. One of them attempts to seize your wrist; you evade him gracefully. Father Flamme observes your outright stubborn refusal and hums his disapproval.
“Unhand me! I’ll go of my own accord. I’ve feet for a reason, and thus they shall work as God intended. I need not the assistance of fools. My legs shall be the ones to carry me.” Punctuating that with an indignant huff, you stride ahead.
What brutish handling… These doltish fiends sit under the tree of knowledge and yet not a single fruit falls into their laps. To think this is how they would treat someone sworn to the church—and a lady, no less!
The latch is weather-worn, and it creaks a discordant note when lifted. You peek into the shadowed entrance and frown. Before you are subjected to the impatience of the men at your side, you step into the dimness. It is alight with the red-orange slivers of a setting sun.
“You shall wait here. I will accompany this misguided Sister to the very top. After which, we shall return to the village and I shall accompany you to the hogs.”
The men nod and stand at attention.
If you’re so dedicated to foolish play, you would be wise to salute, you think with a sardonic tut.
Father Flamme offers his arm. “Shall we?”
Ignoring his attempt at chivalry, you lift your habit so as to not trip on it and begin the lengthy ascent up the spiraling staircase. He chuckles and follows your lead. Every wooden step creaks under your weight. Something brushes your face—dust, perhaps. You swat at your face, grimacing. The scent of mold and rot clings to the bowels of this tower like maggots on a corpse, impossibly redolent in ways you shall avoid giving thought to.
I must not breathe so deeply, lest I wish to savor the taste of decay and bitter rage.
You carry on, ignoring the creeping revulsion and the stench of death as it clouds the air, accompanying you on your journey. A door waits for you at the top. You note it is without a lock.
“A bird will not fly in captivity,” Father Flamme advises, pushing it open to reveal a sparsely furnished room. It’s equipped with the essentials a common prisoner would need. You can’t help feeling less than human the moment you pass through the threshold.
It is enough of a sight to wear on my eyes and render them woefully sore.
He meets you at the door and offers an embroidered reticule. “I shall retrieve you in seven days’ time.”
You eye him dubiously and, upon sensing no additional malevolence, swipe the reticule from him. “May you rest guilty on your bed of lies.”
He leans in close, his voice as faint as a phantasm. “May you reflect on what it is you hold dear, for I assure you it is well within my reach.” He pivots and begins his descent, his footsteps tapping out a resounding rhythm. “You will learn a glorious lesson here. Treasure it as you would a child.”
Minutes later, the door below shuts and the latch is dropped into place. The noise races up the stone spiral in echo, filling your ears with its haunting reverberation.
Now you’re truly alone.
“How boorish he must be to condemn me to this prison!” You slam the door in your anger and drop the reticule onto the bed. In an effort of appraisal, you feel the lumpy mattress. It’s packed full of straw. “I am not nameless, nor am I a harlot. Yet I am gifted the opulence of peasants. I can scarcely accept such generosity.”
Alas, this is your new misfortune.
To busy your idle hands, you open the reticule and peer inside at its contents. A thumb Bible rests beside a bulk of misshapen cloth. Gingerly, you unwrap it to find bread, cheese, and salt pork. Somehow—and you have every right to be fastidious—you doubt this modest portion will be enough for seven days.
“And not a drop of water!” you announce to the empty room. “He has an astounding amount of faith in me if he thinks I will surrender so simply. One day he shall get his gruel. I’ll make sure of it.”
Until then you will never know peace.
Bundling the rations, you place them within the reticule alongside the Bible. Perhaps you should have requested writing implements or a book—anything to preclude the impending accidie.
Beyond the window, which is sized perfectly for the smallest bird, the sun disappears below the horizon. Ink spills across the sky, darkening the surroundings outside the tower and leaving room for stars to speckle the vastness. You sit at the edge of the bed and wrap your fingers around your rosary.
“Dear God, you know I am faultless and so I ask that you guide me in understanding your ways. Father Flamme speaks of protection in your home and yet when danger is knocking you are not there to answer.” You tug anxiously at the beads. “If you are there, show me… Show me that you hear my prayers. Show me that I am not alone. That even I, imperfect as I may be, am deserving of your sanctuary and forgiveness. Amen.”
Shrugging the cloak off, you fold it into a neat square and set it at the end of the bed. Your veil and coif are next to go, and you take immense care in handling both. You slide your dagger out of its sheath and set it on the bed. The night is cool and so you resolve to remain dressed as you are, in your robes and chemise.
“I will endure these seven days. Each one, night and day, I will be strong. My faith will never falter. I will never waver,” you whisper, repeating this oath like a mantra. You settle into bed, sparing a final glance at the square cut into the brickwork, where a starry sky wraps the world in a celestial counterpane. “Perhaps then you might acknowledge me.”
Clutching the rosary close to your chest, comforted with the weapon at your side, you drift into dreamless slumber.
#yandere twst#yandere twst x reader#yandere twisted wonderland#yandere twisted wonderland x reader#yandere rollo flamme#yandere rollo flamme x reader#yandere rollo x reader#yandere rollo#the test of faith#the test of faith prologue
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What Tamlin did was not right, but for him that was the only option he could see that would keep Feyre safe in a court where he had few sentries.
I think this sums up another of my many issues with this series. Tamlin was ABUSIVE, but from his perspective, it makes sense for him to act the way he does. In addition to explaining his desire to keep her cooped up in the manor, we can even take it one step further: Hybern wants Feyre, is hunting her for her power. And the High Lords themselves even contemplate killing Feyre for her power in ACOWAR, when she reveals her magic at the High Lord's meeting. It makes sense for Tamlin to look at Hybern hunting Feyre, consider the likelihood of the High Lords also being threatened by her power, and going, "welp, guess we're not training her now. No powers=no reason for Hybern to hunt Feyre or for the other Lords to decide to kill her. Out of sight, out of mind. :)" Does that excuse his actions? HELL NO.
He's still an abusive piece of shit in ACOMAF, and is still incredibly controlling. No amount of explanations from Tamlin can possibly change the fact that he abused Feyre. Abuse is abuse, no matter how you try to explain it away.
And yet... Rhysand gets a whole chapter dedicated to explaining his abuse, and ultimately that chapter serves to excuse his actions. The moral of Rhysand's story is that abuse is ok so long as you have a good enough reason to do it. But by that logic, Tamlin's abuse should also be excused.
So we're in a conundrum here. If you attempt to argue, as ACOMAF does, that abuse can be "explained way" or "excused" by having a good enough reason, then that excuses Tamlin's abuse in ACOMAF. But if you attempt to argue that abuse is always abuse no matter what your excuse is, then Rhysand is also rendered as abusive as Tamlin is. ACOMAF's own morality makes the story cave in on itself.
my memory is shit and it has been a time since i last read acomaf, but when tamlin locked feyre, he was wrong, yes. But the fact that feyre didn't want to hear him and was constantly tring to put herself in risk of physical harm (like, she was too skinny and sick, had no trainning in self defense and no one new yet that she had power) and she already has a history of not listening safety warnings and going to dangerous places anyway (like in the camalai, she went there as human, two times i think, and left her room at night insteaf of locking the door as anyone with a drop of sense would do in this situation) wouldn't make his actions understandable? (Not justified bc i still think it was wrong, like, when i imagine myself in his shoes i honestly not sure what i would do with a person like feyre bc she doesn't listen. I think I would put 3 bodyguards to take around in a city maybe? Or if the situation was too bad to at least let a space around the manor so she can walk around? I really idk...)
And when we compare it to acosf, nesta wasn't putting herself in risk physical harm, she was simple having sex, she was starving herself, yes but she was drinking so even as it wasn't the ideal, it kept her from completely starving. And the reason she was locked in the house of wind (or indirectly locked but still locked, since no one would take her out of there and she was too weak) was bc the ic felt shame of her.
What i mean is, when comparing both situations:
Feyre was locked bc she constantly doesn't listen to safety warnings.
Nesta was locked bc ic was ashammed of her.
And Tamlin is saw as the devil who did the worst thing in this situation, while what was done to Nesta is justified, when from a logical point of view what Tamlin did is easier to understand when you look at the danger feyre would put herself in, while what was done to nesta was purely bc she didn't do what was expected of her.
Many people really don't look at the situation from Tamlin's POV. Feyre didn't follow his warnings multiple times as a human and needed rescuing multiple times. He sent her away. She came back. She endured hell at Rhys' hands and then Amarantha killed her. Rhys has a magical deal where he will steal her a week every month and hasn't come to collect. Rhys - his worst enemy - hasn't come to collect Feyre, but why???
Tamlin is already paranoid at this point, but his manor should now be safe thanks to the magic returning. It is likely the one place he can keep Feyre safe from Rhys and all other threats. For him, keeping her in that house was about keeping her safe from Rhys/the Attor/other threats.
He was also not in a place where he could offer her stability or help because he needed help too. He suffered for 50 years, but prior to that we even know from Rhys that Tamlin's family is worse than "Beron's brood".
What Tamlin did was not right, but for him that was the only option he could see that would keep Feyre safe in a court where he had few sentries.
I saw a post on reddit the other day that annoyed me because it was talking about a sex scene at the beginning of ACOMAF and how it sealed the deal that they wouldn't be endgame, but Feyre was the one who kept initiating sex with him. Tamlin was often at the bottom of the bed in his beast form, not sleeping. He was not mentally okay either.
With Nesta, all of the IC (except maybe Elain) are mentally stable (okay and maybe azriel). They are all in a place where they can offer support and it not be detrimental to their own wellbeing. The issue we have with the IC is that - Amren washed her hands of Nesta - Rhys doesn't like Nesta - Mor doesn't like Nesta - Cassian only wants to sleep with Nesta
Which leaves Azriel as the only neutral member of the IC to help Nesta*
The moment they met any resistance from Nesta, it was treated as her being difficult. Not that she was somebody in pain. She wasn't ever offered the same love that Feyre was offered when she first came to Velaris. Nobody ever tried to be her friend before they became her jailor. Would it have been so difficult to have just gone to a tavern with her and open up that channel of conversation?**
If putting Nesta in the house of wind was about her safety then they would have done it sooner. They left her for months and months drinking and sleeping around. She could have been killed by any random stranger she met. It was only when she ran up a massive bill and put it in Feysand's name, did they find an issue with her behaviour.
Their idea of "help" was forcing her to do an activity she didn't want to do, in an outfit she wasn't comfortable in, in a place none of them like, in front of misogynists and they literally could not understand why nesta didn't want to train in Windhaven.
*all my nesta vs the buffer girlies can i get a heyyyy
**all my steel & flame girlies can i get a heyyyy
#and ofc these problems just grow as the series goes on until we get to acosf where the bad writing just completely tanks it#<insert obligatory tamlin was a jackass but...> disclaimer here#tamlin's abuse#rhysand's abuse#its the hypocrisy for meeeee#sorry for the rant OP#acotar analysis#anti acomaf
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