#not at home so i drew this on my phone lmao

[deimostes]

[ra-vio]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[multifandomtower-old]

huh; I wonder where they're inviting you to? (answer: a totally safe game of tag)

for @onippep <3

[springgirlshowers]

Inked Doodles

Summary: Joost loves to draw on you, you love to surprise him.

WC: 1210

A/N: this was caused by this video lmao

Joost loved drawing, it became one of his favorite hobbies. It helped him calm down and relax whenever he was stressed.

He also had a tendency to use you as his canvas. Picking up a small habit of leaving little doodles on your skin.

If you were next to him and he had a pen or marker in his hand, you were at risk of a small doodle being left on your arm, hand, or even your legs sometimes.

The marks ranged from stars and smiley faces to full drawings. Dogs, cats, flowers music notes, a little figure of you or him. Anything he was thinking of at the moment.

It was cuter when he’d leave a small J right under the doodle, watermarking it as his.

Sitting on the couch, body opposite from his with your legs draped over his lap as you read a book. Joost pulled a sharpie out of thin air, you had no idea where he got it from.

You felt the cool drag of the marker along your lower leg. You peeked up from behind your book, seeing him focused as he drew a new figure, the tip of his tongue sticking out the corner of his mouth.

“Joost, you’re gonna give me ink poisoning.” You joked, moving away your leg, accidentally having him draw a line on your leg.

“Aw man now it’s messed up.” He groaned, dramatically pouting.

“It’s fine I can just wash it off later.”

“I wish you wouldn’t wash them off.” He leaned his head back on the couch.

“You know I don’t usually, I love your doodles, but I don’t want a random stripe of sharpie left on my leg.” You giggled, then going back to your book.

Soon however, Joosts last thing he said rung in your mind.

I wish you wouldn’t wash them off.

So what if you didn’t? What if you couldn’t wash one off?

That’s when you began your plan, the next appropriate spot on your arm or leg Joost would draw on, whatever he doodled. You’d go to the tattoo parlor as soon as possible, not telling him about it.

The next time he drew on you was when he was writing down song lyrics for a song he hadn’t named yet, he had to go over to the studio in a few hours.

You laid against him your arms wrapped around his torso while he had one wrapped around your shoulder and the other wrote down lyrics in a spiral notebook.

Soon you watched him stop, removing the marker from the paper and moving it to your arm. Drawing a cartoonish but cute looking dog head with its tongue sticking out on your upper arm. Thankfully not in an awkward spot. The placement was perfect.

“Schweinhund.” You smiled and mumbled when you saw the doodle. He looked at you and you saw how his eyes lit up and the gears start turning in his head.

He crossed a line through the question marks he put as the title above the lyrics, writing schweinhund right next to it.

“There we go, that will be the song title! Thanks liefje.” He pressed a grateful kiss to the top of your head.

You were excited to see how amazed he would get at the sight of the dog being tattooed onto you. You knew he wouldn’t be opposed to it. He loves dogs and tattoos, his arms being littered with silly patchwork tattoos.

Once he left for the studio, you made sure he was nowhere near your shared apartment before you left to go to a local trusted tattoo parlor.

You explained your idea and plan to the tattoo artist and they thought it was adorable. They cleaned up and made the line work a bit more neater on the drawing. You kept the tattoo uncolored, just keeping the simple outline on your skin.

The process didn’t take long and once you saw the finished product in the mirror, you were grinning ear to ear. It looked perfect, just like how Joost drew it, just the way you wanted it to.

Nearly skipping down the street in eagerness as you went back to your apartment, hoping Joost would be home soon.

You were a bundle of nervous yet excited nerves as you waited for Joost to come back. You tried to occupy yourself and your mind.

You watched TV, scrolled on your phone, even washed some of the dishes, doing anything to pass the time.

It was 7PM and you were scrolling through instagram on the couch by the time Joost got home, immediately you sat up once you heard the lock on the door click.

The anticipation began again even though you were seconds away from seeing him.

He opened and walked through the door, eyes looking a bit tired and giving you a lazy smile once he saw you.

You waited anxiously on the couch for him to kick off his shoes and walk over.

Soon as he sunk down into the spot next to you, wrapping his arms around your waist and laying his head on your shoulder.

“Mmm, studio was so tiring today.” He mumbled tiredly. Placing his chin on your shoulder to look at your face, a confused small smile took over his face at your expression.

“What’s got you so excited looking?” He sat up, arms still around you.

“I got a tattoo.” You smiled and bit down on your bottom lip.

“Really? You never told me you were planning to get one in the past, let me see!” He said happily, straightening up.

You turned a bit, revealing the doodle he made that was now inked permanently into your skin and covered by clingwrap.

His jaw dropped slightly, your expression faltered and you became worried.

Oh no, he doesn’t like it?

He brought a hand up to hold your arm, careful to not apply to much pressure.

“You got my drawing from this morning tattooed?” He looked at you with starry eyes, you nodded.

“You actually got my silly doodle tattooed?” He asked again after darting his eyes between your face and the tattoo. You nodded at his question once again, biting the inside of your cheek.

“Yeah, you said you wished I would never wash off your doodles.” You laughed nervously, “So, do you like it?” You spoke softly, extremely nervous.

He quickly cupped his hands over the sides of your head, pulling you in to peck kisses all over your face. You scrunched your eyes shut as you giggled.

You had your answer now.

He stopped after placing one sweet passionate one on your lips. He moved his hands from the sides of your head to your cheeks.

“I love it! How could I not? Why didn’t you tell me about it?” He let out a breathy laugh.

“I wanted to surprise you.” You shrugged and looked away.

“Of course.” He said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You’re unpredictable.” He chuckled and shook his head as he looked at your arm again.

“Thank you, liefje. You’re amazing.” He whispered before bringing you in for another sweet kiss, then pulling away to speak again.

“I think it’s time for me to get one for you now.”

[myfictionaldreams]

Winter Soup // Mafia!Stucky x F!Reader

Summary: There was no better feeling than a bowl of hot soup when you're feeling unwell and, what's even better is when it's delivered to your door every day by your new guard. It tasted amazing and you could always trust everyone in the Mafia... right?

Requested by: @senjoritanana​​ thank you so much, I hope you enjoy all the angst!

A/N: PSA I don't know the specifics of how poisons work and didn't want to risk it on my google history lmao so please ignore any inaccuracies. Please read the tags if you're affected by near death experiences, please proceed with caution and if I've missed any tags/warnings, please let me know!

Warnings/Tags: 18+ readers only, hints of smut, angst (LOTS BUCKLE UP), fluff, polyamory relationship, poisoning, blood and injury, anxiety, crying, begging, near death expierences, reader is injured, pain, emotional hurt/comfort, hospitalization, protective Steve Bucky and Sam, everyone needs a hug tbh

Words: 7.7k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

The warmer months were slowly starting to shift into winter and for some reason this year, the weather change was beginning to affect your health. You’d heard of the phrase ‘seasonal depression’ but you were convinced that it was due to the cooler weather that was making you feel this rubbish.

It had been happening for a week now, and some days you’d feel fine, normal in fact but then others your chest felt so tight as if an elephant was sitting on top of you, nausea, vertigo and heart palpations that would have you clutching your chest with fear you might explode. With each passing day, you would be praying for the summer months to return, especially as the snow and ice increased with intensity outside of your home.

You were fine for the most part, good days and bad; yes you might be getting worse with each passing day but you were adamant that the seasonal illness would pass. However, the frosty weather was also a minor blessing because it was your excuse to stay home and be a pretty housewife for Steve and Bucky. Being able to stay home made it easier to keep the illness to yourself as well, it was a busy time within the Rogers mafia and you didn’t need them wasting their time fretting over your wellness when they had a lot of other things to do. They had many international deals that were so close to being signed for and contracted that every waking hour was spent at the office, on phone calls, and emails, trying to talk to locals across the world to attend meetings on their behalf so the boys were thoroughly busy.

There were a few occasions you’d attended with them to the office if you were feeling particularly needy or lonely but it unnerved you to drive on the snow and ice so when you suggested that you might stay at home, Steve and Bucky offered no complaints.

At home at least you were able to mop about, trying to perk yourself up with movies, pyjamas and your favourite bowl of warm soup. Over the last few months, you’d been trying to improve your cooking skills, especially to impress Steve who usually cooked for three of you. This became more interesting as the colder months drew in over Brooklyn as this meant you could cook more homely, hearty foods such as soups and stews, especially as you had recipe suggestions from the newly hired grounds guard Rafael.

He’d been recommended by a friend of a friend for Steve to hire which was perfect timing because the last grounds guard had retired. There were a few occasions when he was the guard to bring the post to the front door from the front gate and you soon found he was enthusiastic and easy to talk to, even though he was a little bit older, which was how you found out he had previously been a chef and offered to give you recipe ideas. As winter drew in, Rafael began turning up when he knew you were by yourself to deliver some of his momma’s family recipe soups, hoping that the meal would perk you up which it did, they tasted so delicious that you were secretly hoping he would keep bringing them to you, especially as you continued to feel unwell.

“What is it today?”, you asked voice full of hope and trying to sound as upbeat as possible. Even though you were desperately holding onto the door handle as your head was spinning and scared you’d fall over.

“Potato and leek soup and they’re all grown in my back yard so hopefully you’ll love it even more than usual”, Rafael smiled as he handed over the container, his smile broad and causing the aged creases at the corner of his eyes to deepen.

Gleefully you accepted the soup, opening the lid slightly to smell the delicious meal, your stomach grumbling with hunger. Your appetite had reduced significantly over the last few days due to always feeling nauseous however it seemed the only thing that you could stomach was his delicious meals and therefore his arrival was always welcomed.

“Thank you so much! Please will you let me pay you this time? You’re being way too kind to me, always giving me free meals, you’re going above and beyond a usual guard”, you pleaded whilst also having to return holding onto the door handle as it felt like the ground was moving with your dizziness.

Rafael held up his hands and shook his head, taking a step back, “Absolutely not! Just wanted to give you something to make you feel better and make the fairies go away”.

The guard halted, a look of embarrassment passing out his features as he realised what he just said, especially as you asked, “Fairies?”

He awkwardly looked down at his shoes, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to explain, “Yeah it’s just something my momma use to say. If we were feeling unwell, it’s because the fairies had crept into our stomachs and were being naughty and making us ill and now I’ve said it out loud to another person I’ve realised how insane that sounds so I’m going to stop talking”.

You squeezed your lips together to try and contain your laughter but that lasted a moment before you were both laughing which only turned into you losing your balance against the door and swaying to keep yourself upright. The laughter died in Rafael’s eyes as he reached out to you, “Woah, you ok, Ma’am?”

Quickly brushing him off, you took a step back into your home, trying to ask nonchalantly about the situation, “Yeah sorry, probably just the fairies pushing me over”. Your joke didn’t seem to comfort him in any way as he continued to look uneased by your appearance.

Thankfully Rafael didn’t push the situation any further, seeing that you wanted to escape back into the comfort of your home, he took his step back with a simple smile. “Get back inside before you catch another cold from this snow. Eat the soup whilst it’s still warm and I’ll be back tomorrow to hear the verdict on the taste.”

“Thank you Rafael! Enjoy the rest of your day!”. You waved him off and rushed to slam the door, sliding down to the floor against the wood, losing all energy that you’d built that morning just for that one conversation. Ok yes, you were feeling sorry for yourself as you tried to catch your breath, heart pounding violently in your chest that it also echoed in your ears and your vision was still seeing double of everything.

However your stomach continued to gurgle with hunger so without wasting any more energy, you opened the lid and ate the entire contents then and there. Releasing a satisfied sigh at the delicious meal, you took another couple of minutes to gather your senses before dragging yourself over to the living room, collapsing onto your back on the couch and letting sleep take you into a dreamless realm.

A violent shake of your shoulders by a hard grip on your shoulder was what startled you awake as Sam’s voice then surrounded you as he shouted, “Hey! Wake up!”.

“I think this is the first time I’ve ever been close to hating you Sam Wilson”, you croaked before coughs shattered your chest, rocking your body as you tried to sit up and suck in any air between the painful coughs. Finally, you calmed down enough to collapse back against the decorative cushions of the couch and open your eyes to look at the three Sam’s that hovered over you. After a couple more blinks, they merged into one, very distressed-looking bodyguard, eyebrows knitted together and jaw muscle clenched harshly.

Sam reached towards your face, pressing against your cheek in concern, “Why didn’t you tell me you were ill?”

“What? I’m not ill, I’m just tired, can’t a girl nap around here?” you questioned with a raised eyebrow, trying to look as relaxed as possible. 

The man didn’t look convinced as he sat on the edge of the couch next to you. Releasing a heavy sigh which only twinged something in your chest that made you want to cough but you refrained from doing so as you emphasised, “Sam seriously, I’m fine”.

Sam gave you another serious glance, eyes hardening as he explained, “You didn’t sound fine, you were wheezing so hard in your sleep I thought you were going to stop breathing”.

There was no denying the panic that filled your heart and would explain the tightened feeling in your chest but you tried to not let the fear show on your face as you rolled your eyes, reaching for his hand and squeezing it.

“I appreciate your concern Sam, but I feel ok, I’m just tired, I was probably just sleeping in a weird position and look, no wheeze now!” Taking a deep breath to show there was no more noise coming from your chest, however, it didn’t seem to comfort him in any way.

“Yeah well you’re still looking peaky and why are you so tired all the time recently, you’re never usually like this”.

“It’s probably just the cold weather or something. If I start to feel unwell, you know I’d tell you. I’m a big baby when I’m ill, you’ll be the first to know”. Sam looked to be contemplating believing you and all you were silently begging for was that he didn’t call Steve and Bucky, they just didn’t need this stress right now. Even though it was in his contract to call them at any sign of injury or illness but as Sam looked at you, other than looking tired, you seemed to be fine and still joking with him. Finally, he gave you a simple nod and you couldn't hold back the thankful sigh. “Do you mind if I go back to sleep for a little while longer or do you need me for anything?”

“You’ve been sleeping a lot recently”, he stated his earlier point again.

“What, so I’m not allowed to nap now?” you teased him with a subtle smile, hoping to crack his worried exterior. It only half worked as he shook his head to himself, standing up and pulling the fluffy blanket that had been left behind you on the couch and throwing it over your body. Before you could even thank him though, sleep had stolen you back into its resting state. 

Sleeping for a few more hours, Sam was nowhere to be seen but he usually liked to check the perimeter ever so often and speak to the other guards so you weren’t worried about his whereabouts. As you shuffled to the kitchen, you couldn’t tell if you felt any worse or better after all the sleeping, haven’t wasted another day feeling sorry for yourself, you tried to snap out of it by glancing through the refrigerator and cupboards and deciding to ssurpriseSteve and Bucky with a romantic meal.

The house was soon filled with delicious scents of sweet and savoury as you’d baked and were in the process of cooking their dinner. You were in your own little world and had only stumbled a handful of times with dizziness and the headache that was building was currently mild in comparison to others you had, it was fine you determined to yourself

Still lost in your own thoughts, you hadn’t even heard the front door open as you were suddenly enveloped by a muscular chest and arms, a smile aching your cheeks as you nuzzled back into Steve’s body. His lips danced over your cheek and down your neck as he held you close, the roughness of his beard comforting. “I didn’t hear you come in”, you commented, turning your head slightly to chase after his lips, sighing deeply in your chest as he held you tighter for a second, hands dipping beneath your shirt at your waist so that he could feel the warmth of your skin.

“I did shout”, he revealed whilst moving back to neck, not to kiss but just to smell you in, his body almost melting into the floor as he felt at home with the familiar scents. “I’ve missed you”, he whispered against your skin.

Goosebumps instantly flooded over your body as you shivered, turning in his arms to hug him properly, your fingers scratching through his hair that was beginning to curl at the ends where he’d allowed it to grow out over the winter months. “I’ve missed you too”, you whispered against his lips, lazily kissing and breathing each other in.

“Come with us tomorrow, I want you to be near me”, he admits with words that were making you cling to him harder.

You wanted to say yes and the word was on the tip of your tongue but then your thoughts drifted to the soup coming. “I’ve got a delivery coming that I can’t miss, I’m sorry”.

“The guards can get the delivery”, he counters.

“It’s fresh soup I want it whilst it’s hot”, an embarrassed smile finds its way to your lips as he leans his forehead against yours, his eyes closed as he just enjoyed the moment of the two of you being together.

“Soup? But we could order that to the office if you wanted it, you know that’s no issue”. 

You pout dramatically, hanging off his neck as you whisper with a childish tone, “But it won’t be the soup that I’ve ordered and want”.

Steve rolls his eyes but you know he's being playful, he could never find a reason to be upset with you. Rolling back his shoulders, he stands back to his full height, opening his eyes to cup your cheek with his massive hand but this was when he took you in and a frown dawned on his face just like it had on Sam’s. “Are you feeling ok?” The hand on your cheek moved towards your forehead, expecting to feel a temperature but it felt normal.

“I feel great”, you say with as much cheer in your tone as possible, still holding onto his neck but mostly because another wave of dizziness had rushed through you and you needed some support to stay standing.

Steve didn’t seem convinced, “You just … look a little off”.

You playfully rolled your eyes, similar to how he had just done, “Wow thanks Steve”.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that”.

“I know, I’m joking, I’m fine - really, it's nothing to worry about”. He eyes you and doesn’t fall for your grin so you tried your next trick up your sleeve. Leaning on your tip toes whilst pulling his face closer, you whispered against his lips, “I love you, Stevie”.

The tension momentarily eased from his shoulders as his grip around you tightened, “I love you too”.

“Sorry to interrupt your love fest but I want my own loving”, Bucky broadly announced from the entrance of the kitchen where he was leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, a twinkle of mischief in his blue eyes however as you pulled back from Steve and he could finally see your face, the happiness seeped from his face. “Woah, what happened? Are you ok?”

You gave a frustrated huff, finally releasing Steve’s neck as you pointed in the direction of the decorated table. “Right, both of you go and sit down before I decide you don’t deserve any food for being mean”.

Steve shuffled away first as you continued to cook the food, Bucky looking ashamed as he came over and kissed your cheek but before he could pull away, you quickly captured his lips in a kiss to show you’d been playing before and weren’t upset.

“Why are there only two plates on the table?”  Steve questioned as he took a seat.

Without looking over your shoulder at him, you casually answered, “I’ve already had mine, I wasn’t sure when you were both going to be home and I didn’t want to wait”. They both seemed to accept your lie and you happily sat with them as they ate, asking about how the deals were going. They both seemed to be agreed that they were sure to have contracts signed tomorrow and had even been able to pay off some of the international police so that shipping of the goods could occur. In truth, after the soup, you were not feeling at all remotely hungry and even the smell of the cooked food had turned your stomach over.

A couple of hours later, the three of you were preparing for bed. Steve is in the middle and you are to his right and Bucky is to his left. You and the mafia boss had been kissing deeply for a couple of minutes, his hands beneath your shirt, brushing against your breasts, rough fingertips peaking your nipples as you ground down on his thigh. You were soaked and he could feel the evidence of it as you weren’t wearing any underwear but the longer the touches and kisses went on for, the more you were feeling unwell.

As his teeth tugged on your bottom lip and he began to trail open-mouthed kisses over your jaw and down your throat, you noticed Bucky was doing the same thing but to Steve’s neck from behind. However, there were two Bucky’s instead of one as your vision swayed and it felt as if you were on a water bed with how unsteady you felt. The headache was close to a full-blown migraine as well now which only continued to make you feel nauseous so even though there was nothing more you wanted than to continue where this intimacy was leading but, for once, you had to stop it.

“Wait, just- just one moment”, you pushed against Steve's shoulders at the same time. The blonde's hold on you loosened as he moved his face back to look into your eyes but you’d closed them, trying to hide your face from him and Bucky who had also sat up further to check on you. “I just- sorry I’m tired and I… I’m not sure- sorry.. I don’t think-”.

Steve’s fingers tipped your chin up to look at him as he smiled softly down at you, “If you don’t want to do anything, we don’t have to. If you’re tired then I’ll just hold you close, ok? Please don’t apologise for not wanting any of this”.

You relaxed in his arms, feeling grateful for him but also bad that you could feel how aroused he was against your stomach. “Thank you. I’m just feeling so tired today. Please don’t let me stop you both, continue without me, I just want to go to sleep”.

“You don’t have to give us reasons why you don’t want to do it, baby, we’ll do whatever you want to do. Me and Buck don’t have to fuck if you want to be held, I don’t want you thinking we’re neglecting you”.

Affection and love warmed your heart as you kissed Steve’s lips and then reached over his shoulder to kiss Bucky. “I love you both but seriously please continue, I like watching you both anyway so that’ll satisfy me enough if I’m not asleep by that point anyway”.

They both gave their love back to you with praises and pecks to your face before rolling away from you and beginning their exploration of each other's bodies. You watched with a smile on your face for a couple of moments and your core ached with need but as a burst of pain pounded through your temple, your eyes shut automatically to help ease the pain and from there, they never opened again as sleep took you soon after.

The next morning, your migraine had gone but your entire body felt weak and drained of any energy. Steve and Bucky took one look at you and determined that they’d be working from home, wishing to remain near you but they still needed the comfort of their home office upstairs whereas you remained downstairs, pretending to watch TV.

Somehow, you had continued to hide your seasonal illness, they just thought you still looked peaky. Today was the worst you’d felt so far, even having to use the wall as support whilst walking around the home, silently coughing into cushions so that the boys wouldn’t hear upstairs and this only increased the sharp pain shooting through your chest.

At lunchtime, Sam came over to visit and found you at the table in the kitchen, head lying against the table top as you dipped in and out of sleep. You were too tired to even pretend to joke and thankfully for once he didn’t pester you with being unwell, especially knowing Steve and Bucky were home, he assumed they had seen how bad you were so he just sat next to you at the table, easing his hand under your head so you had some comfort against the hard surface.

Soon after, Rafael knocked on the front door with your soup delivery. Usually h,e would stay at the door, never coming into your home but Sam insisted that he come out of the cold and deliver the soup to you in person.

“Yay!” you croaked, reaching out for the warm container, seeing the soup within and seeing that it was a deep red colour today, possibly tomato.

“I didn’t know you cooked, Rafael”, Sam noted, taking his seat next to yours once more as the new guard stayed standing at the head of the table. Other than Natasha, Sam was the lead of the security and guards and technically Rafael’s boss.

“Oh yeah, he used to be a chef”, you explained to Sam, whilst opening the lid of the container, smelling the delicious food and confirming your theory that it was tomato soup.

“Chef? I didn’t know you worked as a chef”, Sam remarked with a frown, eyeing Rafael with confusion as he’d been the one to complete the job interview and didn’t remember seeing chef on his CV.

Rafael casually shrugged his shoulders, looking somewhat tense at the questioning but still forced a smile to his face to please his boss. “I didn’t think it was relevant to the job, to be honest”.

“We’ll have to get you on the bbq when the weather perks up, maybe that’ll stop the arguments between Steve and Bucky”, Sam mused over the thought.

You tried to chuckle but the exhaustion had you slumping against the table as you mumbled, “I feel like shit”.

Sam tensed next to you, “Maybe we should call a doctor. You know, I’m surprised Steve and Bucky aren’t down here right now looking after you, do they even know how bad you’re feeling today?”

“Wait, they’re both here?” Rafael asked Sam but he ignored him, his focus solely on you.

Once again you’re too tired to think of an answer and shrug your shoulders, turning your head to look up at Rafael, “I think the fairies like me too much”.

“Fairies?”, Sam questions thinking that you’d become delirious.

You smile genuinely to Sam, reaching to tap his shoulder, “Inside joke Sam, keep up”.

There was no further discussion of fairies as more hacking coughs ripped through you. It took a couple of moments and Sam rushed to get you a glass of water before you slumped back against the table in exhaustion.

“Why don’t you have the soup and then see how you’re feeling later? Maybe the rest is all you need”, Rafael suggested, filling the silence with his voice.

You couldn’t see it but Sam gave his employee a scathing look, “Rest is all she’s been doing. I’m calling the doc and then I’m going upstairs to tell Steve and Bucky”.

“Aren’t they busy?” Rafael continued to question Sam. “I’ve heard they’ve got that deal coming up from Italy and France, they might appreciate it if you wait a little bit before calling Doctors”.

Sam’s voice was quiet and stern but you were too tired to notice. “That’s not common knowledge, how do you know that?”.

Massaging your temples with the pounding thuds that hadn’t stopped since your coughing fit, you decided that Rafael was right, usually sleep made you feel better. Reaching for the soup one more, you opened the container as you addressed your bodyguard, “he’s right Sam. I just need today for all the work stuff to be over and then I’ll call the doctor. The boys don’t need any distractions, especially today, one more day isn’t going to kill me”.

Sam didn’t look happy as you began to idly sip on the thick, delicious soup. As you thanked Rafael for the meal, Sam finally looked back to him, his frown deep and unmoving as he asked, “Don’t you have work to do?”

Rafael’s spine straightened, “Oh yeah, right. Sorry, sir” and with that, he left to return to work.

“You don’t have to be so bossy you know, he’s just trying to help”, you tried to reason with Sam.

However, your friend ignored you and moved to hold your hand to pull your attention away from the meal and towards him. “I’m giving you until the evening, wait no- if you get any worse before the evening, I am calling the Doc, no arguments, understand?”

“Yes sir”, you say with a little salute.

Finishing your soup, your boyfriends finally came downstairs and you attempted to straighten your posture and plaster a fake smile on your face. Bucky paused in the entryway, sniffing the air and asking, “What’s that smell, I know it's from somewhere but can’t put my finger on it”.

“Is it my soup?” you say, trying to stand up and act like the floor was spinning beneath you.

“No, it’s not that”, he pondered, still looking around and trying to smell whatever he recognised but couldn’t pick it up again. Steve and Bucky both walked past you, kissing the back of your head as you casually explained that you were going to lie down for a little bit. “Wait, let me come with you-”, Bucky started but you held out your hand to stop him.

“You’ve got a busy time at work and I’ve got Sammy boy here anyway so you two continue with your work and we’ll have a nice evening in, Ok?”

“Yes Ma’am”, he mutters before continuing to make his lunch. It wasn’t often that he listened to your instructions but both men were so busy and overwhelmed with work and the consequences that could come from it all that they were all over the place.

The next hour passed by slowly and you didn’t manage to sleep even for a moment because your symptoms were making you feel so awful. You were wheezing so bad that each breath felt like you were suffocating, your eyes began to roll with how much the room was spinning and a violent tremble rocked through your entire body, you didn’t feel right, something was wrong and it was beginning to scare you.

“Sam?” your voice was nothing more than a rasping whisper but he still was able to hear you from where he had been on the phone with the doctor from across the room, having noticed your deterioration in health. He was kneeling by your side in a couple of broad steps, the phone balancing between his cheek and shoulder as he rested a hand on your temple, feeling your spiked temperature. “I don’t feel good”, you admitted, voice full of terror before more coughs ruptured through your chest, leaving you struggling to breathe.

“Steve! Bucky get down here right now!”

“No… no, I just need to sleep”, the fear had disappeared from your voice as you wished for the exhaustion to take you completely, hoping that in sleep you wouldn't feel the pain destroying your insides.

“Hey! No!  Don’t go t sleep, need you to stay awake for me, Doctor Banner is on his way but you can’t go to sleep”, Sam urgently tapped your face, rousing you from the sleep as Bucky had all but jumped down the entire flight of stairs at the shouting.

“What’s going on- What the fuck? Doll?” he replaced where Sam was so that he could continue to explain to the doctor what was happening.

“I’m just not feeling ok, it’s fine Bucky go back to work”, you were somewhat delirious, still not really opening your eyes but leaning into the coldness from Bucky’s hand as he cupped your face. Bucky looked to Sam for answers, his eyes bright and alert with fury and worry.

When Sam shrugged his shoulders, not having any answer as to why you were suddenly so unwell, Bucky quickly turned back to you and assessed your deteriorating health and noticed just how laboured your breathing had become. As he spoke, it was with surprising gentleness but still held authority, “I need you to take a deep breath for me, honey, I want you to try and fill your lungs with air”.

“I’m trying, it’s just seasonal illness, it’ll be ok”.

“What are you talking about?” Bucky asks, not letting go of your face but just moving in closer.

“It’s just seasonal”, your words began to slur as you became incoherent.

Steve finally descended the stairs with just as much purpose as Bucky as he demanded to know what was going on but Bucky couldn’t answer him as he continued to talk to you and keep you awake. “It’s not seasonal, you’re not breathing properly, it’s not-”. Bucky was leaning so close that he was able to smell your breath and he froze, it looked like he now wasn’t even breathing.

“What is it Bucky?” Steve demanded, kneeling next to him and reaching over to take your hand but also feel your pulse, which only made his own increase with worry.

Bucky leans closer and smells your mouth again, so close that you tried to move away as his nose nudged your lips. “What did you eat?” Bucky asked in a tone that forced your eyes to open with concern.

“Huh? Um just my soup”, you say whilst blinking quickly as he still wouldn’t come into focus.

“Soup? Where is it? Where’s the container?” before you could answer, he was on his feet and running into the kitchen as Steve continued to demand answers from his boyfriend, his hand now moving from your wrist to directly over your heart, continuing to count the beats.

Bucky cursed so violently that it actually made you shrink into the cushions but the movement only made you cough more and chest tighten as you struggled to breathe. He returned to the room, his face a deathly white and green shade as he uttered just one word: “Hemlock”.

There was just one brief second where not a body in the room breathed or even moved, one single second to process the poison that Bucky had spoken, the planet that he only knew about because of his time as the Winter Soldier and using it on his target. The poison that he could now smell on your breath, that originated from your container of soup.

It was Sam to speak first, Sam to snap the two men out of their frozen states as he gave the orders from Doctor Banner who had heard the word over the phone. “We need to get her to a hospital right now”.

Steve picked you up, and his entire body began to tremble with adrenaline and fear as no one even stopped to properly dress for the snow outside, only putting their shoes on before rushing to the car. Sam thankfully was able to use the adrenaline to remain headstrong as he climbed into the driver’s side of the car so that Steve and Bucky could both hold you in the back seats and try and keep you awake.

You were lying with your head in Steve’s lap with your body lying across Bucky’s as they clamped their arms around you as makeshift seatbelts. You had heard the word that Bucky had said and even though you knew what it was, you didn’t want to believe it, even as you continued to feel worse. “It’s not poison, it’s just soup”.

However, those words triggered something within your throat and once more you were coughing so hard that you thought you were going to vomit and cringed as metallic warmth filled your mouth and leaked out of the corner of your lips.

You slumped onto Steve and Bucky, head lulling back but Steve was quick to grab your face, tapping it and forcing you to stay awake, “Baby don’t go to sleep! Please stay awake for me! Stay with us, we’ll be at the hospital soon, I promise”.

You were scared, even though you were half-conscious, you were terrified now realising the severity of the situation, knowing that you were coughing up blood which was now soaking the front of Steve’s shirt and hearing how panicked your boyfriends were only made it worse. Through all the scary, dangerous times in your life, they always remained calm and in control but now they were both frantic and frightened. 

As all three men continued to plead with you to stay awake, you forced yourself to open your eyes, only allowing yourself the luxury of blinking occasionally as you kept looking into Steve’s ocean-blue eyes. With his body and face so close to yours, you used him to ground you in the situation, trying to copy his breathing which had slowed since you’d opened your eyes; ignoring the pain from the breaths and resisting the urges to cough even though blood continued to fill your mouth.

“Am I going to die?” you whisper, not being able to ignore the questions now in the back of your mind anymore.

Steve’s breath hitched for a second before he tried to confidently whisper, “No, you’re not going to die”.

You didn’t believe him, especially as the trip to the hospital was delayed by the snow, every second feeling like it could be your worse, you didn’t want it to end like this.

“I love you.”

“You’re going to be ok, just keep looking at Steve, keep breathing”, Bucky pleaded, squeezing your freezing cold hand.

“Please, just say it back”, your voice was hardly audible anymore as your mouth was so full of blood.

“Stop talking and save your energy for when you’re feeling better”, Bucky tried to keep his composure but you knew he was close to snapping.

Your breaths were wet and laboured, wheezing so violently it rattled and echoed around the car but you still managed to plead, “Say it back-”.

“I love you, I love you so fucking much, please don’t leave me, baby”. Steve snapped first, his eyes were wide, fearful and yet beautiful with how stark the blue was as his eyes filled with tears, leaking down his cheek and into his beard.

You were thankful, for both of them, for everything and you wish you could have told them, wishing that you could have heard Bucky’s own declaration of love and adoration for you but the pounding of your heartbeat became so loud in your head that you couldn’t hear anything anymore.

But you continued to hold on, never once looking away from those pretty eyes of Steve’s as Sam finally screeched to a halt outside of the hospital. Once more, Steve carried you and there was a flurry of people in different coloured scrubs suddenly surrounding you as you were placed onto a cold bed.

One moment you were staring into Steve’s eyes and the next you were looking up at a stranger and the comfort you’d once felt, the thing that was grounding you to life was now gone and you couldn’t find him again, no matter how much you moved on the bed, even as the strangers poked and prodded at your body until you couldn’t deal with it anymore and finally closed your eyes.

Do you ever have those naps where you wake up and forget where you are, or what time or day it is? That was currently how you felt except the added sensation of floating encompassed your body as well. The only sort of normality felt throughout your body was a cool feminine hand stroking across your temple in a soothing, repetitive manner.

Your toes wiggled firstly and then your eyes behind your eyelids and even though you knew who was stroking your forehead, you still croakily asked, “Steve? Bucky?”

“It’s just me Sugar” Natasha sounded calm and peaceful as her fingers didn’t stop with their soothing motions. “The boys are going to be so pissed that you’re awake before they’ve got back”.

You huff and dared to open your eyes, grunting at the brightness of the room but thankfully your eyes adjusted and only one, still, Natasha smiled down at you. Seeing that you weren’t going to vomit or freak out, Natasha sat back in her chair, moving to hold onto your hand to give you some comfort. “You gave us a real scare”.

You thought back to everything that happened, some of it was a blur but most of it still played through your mind like a horror movie that you couldn’t look away from or escape. “Was I really poisoned?”

There was one thing that you appreciated about Natasha and that was her blunt honesty, not one to ever sugarcoat her words, “You were”.

“But… But how? I mean… the soup, Rafael, he wouldn’t-”. You stopped yourself talking, trying to envision all the interactions you’d had with him but only one thing repeated through your thoughts: Don’t trust anyone. That was one of the first rules Steve had taught you. “I don’t understand why? He seemed so nice to me, is his name even Rafael? Was everything a lie?”

“That’s what they’re just finding out. Apparently, the friend of a friend rouse was made up including his credentials, usually, our background checks are very thorough but he had some help to slip through the cracks”.

“Do you know what help he had? Who it was, I mean?”

Natasha for once seemed to think before she spoke which unnerved you, knowing that whoever’s name she spoke next wouldn’t be good news.

The monitor displaying your heartbeat began to beep as it increased with the dread that was settling through your body.

“All signs are currently pointing to Pierce”.

Your eyes closed as you tried to remember how to breathe. You knew about Alexander Pierce. Everyone did. He was ruthless and had plenty of finances and power to pay for his success but not only this, he had been one of the top employees of Hydra and usually in charge of the Winter Soldier. So yes, you all knew a lot about Alexander Pierce and his name was one to send fear through any of those involved in the Rogers mafia, even Steve.

As you opened your eyes again to look at Natasha, you could tell she wanted to tell you more but was holding the information to not panic you further but you needed to know. “Please just tell me whatever it is you’re not telling me”.

“We think he paid this guy to come and spy on Steve and Bbucky and it seems he put his sights on you. Specifically.. Because you’re their biggest weakness and it seemed like everyone knows that”.

Your face warmed with fear and anger, as fear prickled the corner of your eyes, “So what, now I’m not even safe in my own home?”

“That’s not-” Tasha began to lean forward in her seat but another voice cut her off.

“No, you weren’t safe in your own home”. Steve stood at your hospital room door, dressed casually in a black shirt and jeans, looking nothing out of the ordinary but his face was wrath of calm and anger. Your eyes snapped from him to Bucky who had looked just as serious but as your eyes connected with his, the hard lines of his face smoothed out into a weak smile.

The two of them step into the room as Natasha stands, informing everyone that she’d give us some space and guard the door.

You’re trying desperately to keep the tears at bay, to keep them from slipping and cascading down your cheeks, not wanting your boyfriends to feel any more guilt but as you took a deep breath in, a sob erupts through you and you can’t keep the emotions back anymore.

You attempted to hide your face with your hands, even with the added difficulty of having tubes and wires attached to the backs of your hands and the tips of your fingers. The realities of everything that had happened began to destroy any hope that you had. You’d nearly died, in your own home where you were supposed to be most safe.

Steve and Bucky sat on either side of your hospital bed, moving silently as they always did and with careful ease, gently took a hand each and pried them away from your face, stroking away any tears that continued to escape.

“I’m sorry, I just- I don’t know… It’s a lot”, you tried to give reason for your crying, even though it was unnecessary. Bucky tilted your face towards him, his voice was so soft and caring that it nearly made you sob with how careful he was being with you, “Don’t apologise for crying, I tell you this all the time, Doll”.

You offered him a wet giggle, taking a few deep breaths before rambling on with your anxiety, “I bet I look like a right mess right now, I don’t even know how long I’ve been asleep for”.

They let you calm yourself down before Steve praises with his low captivating voice, “You always look beautiful, no matter how much snot is on your face”. He smiles as he manages to make you laugh before he turned serious, “It’s been 5 days, baby”.

Your face drops, “5… I’ve been asleep for 5 days?!”

“You passed out when we arrived and when they could finally stop the bleeding you-”

“Bleeding?” you questioned, remembering you were bleeding from the mouth but it didn’t seem like that much.

“The poison you’d ingested that day was a higher dose and caused internal bleeding. After they were able to stabilise you, they needed to detox you from the poison and make sure your body was healing so it was safe to keep you asleep”.

You tried to process everything that Steve had told you, it felt confusing for you to have been through so much and yet feel such little pain in your body.

As if reading your mind, Bucky once again captivated your attention as he asked, “How are you feeling? Are you in pain?”

“No I’m not in any pain but I feel wrong like my body is floating in the water or something”.

“That might be due to the medications that they’ve got you on, they’re pretty strong Sweetheart”, his pet name helped to calm your disorientated mind, clinging on to the familiarity and focusing on the way both of their hands were holding yours and stroking tiny circles in your skin,

“Did you get the answers you wanted, from Rafael, or whatever his name is”.

Steve and Bucky shared a glance between each other but Steve decided to be the one to answer. “We got the answers, it was as Nat was explaining. Pierce wanted someone in the gang, spying and getting as close to us as possible and I guess they somehow managed to weasel their way in and tried to succeed with their plan to hit our weak spot”.

You took a deep breath to try and reduce the rising anxiety in the pit of your stomach before asking tentatively, “So what happens now? With Pierce I mean.”

“That’s a problem for another time, just need you to get better first”, Bucky interjected, lifting your hand to kiss the few fingers that were attached with clips or wires.

You tried to smile at him, wanting him to know how much you appreciate him but the feeling never met your eyes and this seemed to twist something in Steve and Bucky. Both of their demeanours changed, no longer were you looking at just your boyfriends but also the mafia boss and his second in command, mixing business with family.

Bucky began talking first, tone strong and husky, “This isn’t something we are taking likely. Sam’s already spent the last day and a half revisiting everyone’s past, making sure there are no other moles that have slipped through the cracks. No new faces are allowed anywhere near our home or you.”

As he spoke, you managed sure to nod your head and try to squeeze his hand in understanding. Steve shifted in his chair, capturing your attention as he continued the discussion. “You are safe and you should have been safe but we let you down, you were vulnerable when we weren’t there to protect you like we promised we would. We let you down, we broke our promise, we could understand if you didn’t want-”.

“Whatever you’re about to say you better forget about it right now”, you say sternly, heartbeat beginning to race on the monitor again as Steve’s mouth shut quickly with a snap. “The idea of being your weakness has always frightened me but, I could also be your greatest strength. I mean - Look at what you’ve been going just to protect the house, to protect me. I know you feel like you’ve let me down but I don’t feel let down in any way. Yes, of course, what’s happened is scary, especially in our home but I doubt it’ll ever happen again. They can try and tear us apart, they can try, but they won’t break us, they can’t break us. We have to remain on top ok? I always feel safe and trusted when I’,m with you both so please, don’t ever feel like I'm not because I am. I’ll always love you both, I’m not going anywhere”.

You sucked in air greedily after your short speech, the building emotions spilling freely everything you truly believed to the men beside you, not wishing for them to ever feel doubt for the relationship or how you felt.

Looking between them both, your heart sank as you noticed Bucky quickly wipe the corner of his eye. “I thought you said no more tears”, you spoke softly whilst trying to wipe away a stray tear.

“That’s before you decided to swoon me with your speech”, he quipped back, the light returning to his eyes once more as you laughed.

“I love you Bucky”.

“I love you, Doll”, standing from his chair, his metal hand stroked over the side of your face as he captured your lips with his, lingering for a few beautiful seconds before sitting back down.

Steve had lifted your hand during your speech and was kissing your palm and you reached out to stroke his beard, “I love you, Steve”.

He too stood, just as Bucky had but he kissed your forehead first, breathing you in for a moment before doing the same against your lips. “I love you too, so much baby”.

As Steve sat back down, your eyes began to feel heavy, all of the strong emotions exhausted you completely. “Will you both be here when I wake up? Not that I’m complaining about Natasha but she doesn’t spoon me like you both do”.

They both chuckle under their breath before Steve promises, “We aren’t going anywhere, sleep, Sweetheart”.

[blue-jisungs]

okay imagine like with svt (either ot13 or minghao jihoon and seungkwan pls) you’re studying for some test in eng / a language other than korean and you go to them with like the tiniest handwriting, tons of notes, all on one page all proud and theyre just like “…now wtf does this say bro” love u axie (if i can call u that) take a rest and i love u sooo so much! u can dm me if my req is a little confusing <33

speaking your native language in their presence ♡

a/n. the way i RAN to write this!! it took a moment ngl but phew, i’m done!! thank you for requesting, hopefully you like it roxie!!! and ofc you can call me axie, it makes my heart melt ngl <3

also i had a race with time to finish it before you go on a hiatus i was STRESSING LMAO but i made it 😌

warnings. cursing >:T

oh and for anyone interested i also have enha && skz && bts versions of this!!

┆彡 SEUNGCHEOL [ 승철 ]

mans so used to talking w you in korean that he kind of??? forgot??

so once you were talking with your mom over the phone and his mouth went ajar

like that man was ready to call the exorcist

and then it clicked and he was like oh ☺️

after the shock went away he swore he fell in love over n over again

loves hearing you talk in your native tongue :(

he’s so entertained by it too, like i swear he’s like a kid (affectionate)

you were laying in seungcheol’s arms, head nuzzled into his neck. his big arms held you tightly and he softly drew shapes onto your skin.

“and… seventeen?” his question made you smile. you translated how the number sounds in your native language.

and cheol started giggling.

“sev…enteen… it’s so.. rustly” he chuckled, attempting to say it “oh! what about our songs?”

“well… hot would be hot” you barely finished and seungcheol was giggling like a teenager. it was so contagious that you couldn’t help but start laughing too. but then he attempted to say it and failed horribly, causing a full on hysteric laughter from both of you.

maybe it was the late hour or his failed attempts. whatever it was, it felt so heartwarming.

he will learn with your help a couple of basic phrases!!

due to his busy schedule he can’t study on his own but once he has some free time he’s doing those duolingo lessons LIKE A FREAK

oh and also

if he’s pouting bc he’s in a bad mood, all it takes is a kiss and a nickname thrown at him in your native language ^_^

┆彡 JEONGHAN [ 정한 ]

he’s like a cat – curious but won’t let it show

shushes everyone in the room if you’re talking to your friends or parents in your native language through the phone :”)

obviously so they hear you better duh (not because he wants to listen, duh)

will learn some phrases on his own so you two can communicate (and cheat) while you’re playing games w his friends hehe

he absolutely fell in love with the kitchen of your home country like 😭😭😭

and and he absolutely adores the names of the dishes, esp when you pronounce them so effortlessly

it unlocked something in him….. sure he had a soft spot for you but now oh boy

“hannie…” you whined, tugging his sleeve.

you had a small fight, well… more of a disagreement: he wanted some ramyeon and you were craving (dish name). obviously he folded in half and knew he’s done for the second the dish name rolled off your tongue so satisfyingly.

“please? we didn’t have it in a while! we can order (dish name no2) too? pleasepleasepleaseee” you pouted. jeonghan sighed dramatically, raising his eyebrows.

“okay. but say it one more time” he grunted, a smile creeping on his face.

“you’re so weird” you mumbled amusingly in your native language and he frowned

“hey, i understood that!” jeonghan scoffed, causing you to chuckle.

he looks at you with literal hearts in his eyes whenever you speak your native language, just saying <\\3

when he’s feeling extremely soft, usually when you’re about to go to sleep cuddled n all, he’ll ask you to just whisper some random stories

it lulls him to sleep so fast

please also caress his hair he’ll melt on spot 🥹

┆彡 JOSHUA [ 조슈아 ]

he knows the struggles of feeling away from home so the second you start feeling homesick he’s there to make you feel better:”)

shua loves hearing you mutter some random words, for example when you’re counting or something

will also ask for music recommendations and he will learn some of the songs so he can sing them while playing the guitar

also he’s INVESTED

like,, shua will watch you scribble down in your mother tongue mesmerised

it’s not that fun, however, when you’re in a rush and you left him a note with a grocery list scribbled down

… and a couple of things in your native language…. messily written that even the translator doesn’t understand it…

“uhhh… y/n, darling?” joshua’s voice rung in your ears as you picked up the incoming face time call. you smiled upon seeing his cute but puzzled face.

“yes, baby? also good morning to you too” you hummed, fixing your earphones. his face lit up upon seeing you

“oh woah, you look good today. but i’m in a bit of a pickle…” he hesitated, the camera turning around. you noticed the note you left behind and your eyes widened upon realising that you wrote some of the items in (language name).

“oh” you giggled.

“oh indeed” he shook his head with a loving smile “and even the translator doesn’t–“

“it’s butter, flour and cucumbers” you explained and joshua let out a dramatic, relieved sigh

he notes down the words after such incidents so he doesn’t have to call you eveytime

and it’s safe to say that he’s build a quite big vocabulary so far

and he’s always so proud like

“hey y/n i bought the (cucumbers in your language) you wanted!” with the widest grin ever

┆彡 JUNHUI [ 文俊辉 ]

my mans woke up one day and decided to learn your language

bought books, textbooks, audiobooks, duolingo plus (or premium, however it’s called) and casually managed to learn A LOT

he just loves the way it sounds and aspires to talk so fluently like you

ofc he knows he still has a lot to learn but don’t underestimate him

and the main reason when he’s gonna use it it’s just… bothering you ^_^

“–and then he gave me flowers! yeah! he’s the sweetest!” you were gossiping with your bestie over the phone, peeking at jun calmly reading a book “ugh, i know! i know, i know, i know, shut up!”

jun just smirked, getting ready to say something.

“trust me, i’d drop on my knee right here right now if i weren’t such a chicken” you giggled and blush creeped on your cheeks when you met your boyfriend’s curious gaze

“i’d prefer to do it, to be honest, but you’re such a cutie” jun said calmly in (language name) and casually returned to his book. your mouth fell ajar as your bestie started squealing over the fact that he spoke (language name)… apparently.

jun just winked and you cleared your throat, hanging up quickly.

“what was that?!” you laughed and he just shook his head with a mischievous smile.

he’s such a gremlin >:(

so yeah, expect him to start spilling tea in your native language as an excuse to 1) spend more time w you 2) practice his skills

but as i said he’s??? like?? almost fluent??? his accent is so so adorable too <|\3

he’s so smug abt it as well

like if you ask him, he’ll pretend like he doesn’t know a thing in (language name)

but if he’s abt to bully you (affectionately) he’ll come up with the most creative nicknames known to a humankind

also, if you have siblings… he WILL gossip w them in your mother tongue too 😐

┆彡 SOONYOUNG [ 순영 ]

oh boy.

he’s so so curious to hear you say even one (1) thing in your language

but totally misses it when you actually say some words throughout the day

obviously knows one word: tiger (wow shocking?!!!)

and uses it sm 😭 he has your contact name written as my tiger but my is in korean and tiger in your native language 🥹

he calls you like that often, it’s like a new nickname for you

he may be not so invested into actually learning it but your culture tho!!! esp dancing n music… sigh <\\3

you stepped into your apartment, the weight of this tiring day on your shoulders. as you lazily took off your shoes and put the bag with groceries into the ground you realised something.

the song playing in the background was strangely similar. suddenly it clicked. it was a popular song by an artist from your country! just when you realised, the sound of shoes squeaking against the wooden floor stopped.

“are you dancing to… (song title)?” you breathed out as your boyfriend popped out from behind the corner.

“yeah! i love the vibe of the song!” he grinned and gave you a welcome kiss. after pulling away you could see the gears were turning in his head “could you translate the lyrics?”

as you made your way to the practice room, you hummed the song underneath your breath. and in this moment soonyoung’s heart skipped a beat.

since that moment it’s like a routine that you sing/hum him to sleep some songs in your native language

or just whisper some stories

he’s out like a baby fr

ALSO

a big enjoyer of the soap operas

he’ll binge them with you or alone and be actually invested in the drama

that’s how he also learned curse words ☺️☺️

┆彡 WONWOO [ 원우 ]

oh my precious nonu :((

he adores it sm when you speak your native language

when you’re shy abt it he just has to use all of his willpower to prevent himself from squealing like a teenage girl

will ask you to teach him and it’s just so so soft *screams*

you’ll be laying in bed, in his arms as you read through the textbook and explain the grammar of the sentence given

and he’ll repeat it in tiny 🥹

it’s so so wholesome

but.

you let out a sigh, the grasp on your mouse tightening. wonwoo noticed and let out a chuckle.

“what’s up?” he asked, peeking at your screen.

“the fucking skeleton won’t leave me alone” you grunted in your mother tongue, earning a gasp from him. suddenly the arrow that the minecraft skeleton shot hit you and you fell down from the tree at top of which were you hiding “fuck!”

“baby!” he laughed hysterically, his head thrown back. your eyes widened, realising the curse words

“sorry! why is this stupid block game making me emotional?! ignore me” you scoffed and he just shook his head, smiling proudly at the new knowledge he obtained.

he finds it so endearing when you swear in your native language 😭😭😭

and it’s such a bad habit, especially when you play games together, that he started doing it too???

wonwoo laughs that you’re a bad influence but secretly he loves the way the curses roll of tongue 😭😭

┆彡 JIHOON [ 지��� ]

you could sneeze and you’re literally inspiring him to write 82837492 songs

so when he heard you talk in (language name) he was just like in another dimension

he’s smiling like an idiot fr his friends thought something was wrong but it was just you <3

uh however he kind of… never saw your handwriting in (language name)

and once you were studying for an important exam and mans had a heart attack

“hey y/nnie have you seen my…?” his voice died out in his throat upon seeing you and your notes. they were all scribbled in a tiny handwriting in some… letters he didn’t fully recognise. you had like five A4 pages of such notes.

jihoon blinked repeatedly, trying to think if he wasn’t in the sun for too long today – his eyes must be playing a trick on him.

“look! im so happy with the outcome, it looks so cute!” you grinned and turned around to see him almost hyperventilating “hoonie?”

“what–“ he frowned, pointing with his finger at one of the pages. what is going on?

“it’s in (language name), dumbass” you scoffed, everything suddenly making sense to him “it helps me understand stuff better”

“oh” he grunted, shifting his gaze to the page with little drawings “what does it say?”

“oh it’s the–“ you started explaining, throwing in some words in your mother tongue subconsciously. he just smiled and listened attentively.

lmao

regarding that, he enjoys just listening to you as you study and whisper some of the words/sentences in your mother tongue!

it really calms him down and usually puts to sleep to <\\\3

oh oh! and when you caress his hair while doing so… ah, he’s so whipped

he has tons of songs that are unreleased… and yes, you guessed correctly, with your consent he used some of your voice memos n all in the background

the songs are so cute :( he’s really proud of them too!! and it’s so sweet that it’s just… for the both of you <3

please leave in his studio some “i love you!” or “have a good day” sticky notes, preferably in (language name) or with translations?! he’ll melt :[

also another one that reaaaally likes the curse words >:T

┆彡 SEOKMIN [ 석민 ]

from the moment he met you he was always curious about your culture n native language but never pushed you to speak it n all

and gradually while dating him you started using it more and he started paying more attention

like he didn’t notice before that the funny sound you do while dropping something is actually cursing! 😀

what’s surprising, he understands a lot – maybe it’s the context or just some magical powers

but sometimes you can communicate like you say something in (language name) and he answers in korean bc he understood

and he’s so so in love with your accent and the way your face lights up when you speak it your mother of tongue

but for the love of god please – somehow – stop speaking it in your sleep, he’s gonna have a heart attack one day 🥰🥰

dokyeom stirred in his sleep, slowly waking up. he wasn’t sure why but suddenly he heard something.

it was definitely something. he sat straightly, narrowing his brows confused. what is that sound? is that a burglar? or…?

he looked over at you. no, you were sleeping peacefully. seokmin looked around the dark room, his heart speeding up. was this a nightmare? or was he just going insane?

then again. no, it must be someone saying something. something that he can’t understand.

then it clicked and he looked at you. your mouth was moving slightly, incoherent (language name) words being spoken.

he scoffed and went back to sleep, pulling you closer.

it took him so much time to get used to that but anyways 🏃‍♀️💨

and he’ll definitely make fun of you for that too (as if he didn’t have a whole ass jumpscare)

he absolutely adores ballads in (language name), it’s like his new obsession

and he tries to sing them, with the cutest accent ever :(

will occasionally twist some words but it’s okay, he’s enjoying himself 🫶

┆彡 MINGYU [ 민규 ]

this dork

he always acknowledged your native language n all but unlike dk he asks u to speak it 24/7

like, you don’t get it: he’s obsessed.

you could insult him in his face in (language name) and he’ll look at you with hearts in his eyes

he wants to learn it, he really does, but it’s just so frustrating when he fails :(

mingyu was sitting at the dinner table, his food long forgotten while he was biting at the end of the pencil. glasses sitting at the bridge of his nose, brows furrowed.

“gyu? you’re still here?” your voice snapped him back to reality, eyes widening. you rubbed your eyes.

“yeah i just don’t get it…” he whined, shoulders slumping “i understand the words but they don’t make a logical sentence in my head”

“baby…” you chuckled softly and stood behind him, wrapping your arms around his torso and resting your chin on his shoulder.

he grabbed his food, cold now, and slowly chewed on it as you explained everything.

“because look. this word, what does it mean?” you asked, noticing that he’s eating so you just scoffed and continued “girl, right? but this ending here added means girl’s. and this? old. but those letters here? they make it an adjective, so…?”

“older?” he asked, puppy eyes glaring at you with adoration. you nodded with encouragement and he tried again “so… the girl’s older brother had a dog?”

“yeah! good job baby! now let’s go to sleep, hm? i’m tired” you giggled and pecked his cheek. he nodded proudly.

kisses really motivate him btw >:)

he watches those yt videos of people teaching and giving tips but he loves when you give him private tutoring lessons 🫶

will often cook you some regional dishes in return

generally, he enjoys exploring your national cuisine ^_^

also would love to go to (country name) w you and take some pics…

… or propose there

so just go there w him already! 🙄

┆彡 MINGHAO [ 徐明浩 ]

shut up i want him

you’re each other’s private tour guides 😭

museum dates are such a must, and you’re just talking abt something that impacted a certain artwork (like cultural event in history or something) and he just listens genuinely interested!! and vice versa

loves when you read out loud poetry in your native language :(

started taking lessons?? like one day you woke up and he was just on a zoom call saying something like “my name is minghao” with the cutest smile ever

and you’re like?????

he’s such a fast learner 🥹 hao believes it’s because he truly wants to learn in order to communicate with you 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

but that didn’t prepare you for what was about to come next…

don’t let him near your parents. he WILL gossip with them abt you.

“does she swear a lot?” your mom’s voice reached your ears as you walked into the your apartment, grocery bags in your hands. your parents were visiting you and minghao but…

“like a sailor! no, i’m joking. of course she doesn’t. she does snore a lot, though” your boyfriend giggled and you let out a dramatic gasp.

“hao!” you whined and they both looked at you, not really caring that you’re here now.

“i guess she has that after her father” your mom chuckled and minghao noticed her tea is almost finished, so he poured some more in “oh, you’re such a gentleman”

“it would be a crime if i wasn’t in a presence of such an beautiful lady” he hummed and sent you a playful look. you just rolled your eyes and started unpacking the groceries.

“gentleman my ass” you grunted quietly.

“y/n!” your mom frowned and suddenly you heard someone standing up. in no time minghao hugged you from behind, nuzzling his face into your neck

“i just told your mom you don’t swear, honey” he murmured in korean

“well, ass is not a swear word” you pouted. minghao chuckled and helped you unpack the bag.

“you’re right, it’s a part of human body but i am surely more than that” your boyfriend teased and you just nudged his arm, rolling your eyes once again.

i feel like it might take a while but he’ll actually manage to be fluent?

so when you sadly forget a bit of (language name) due to mostly using korean and make a mistake, it’s almost like that mingyu-joshua moment

and hao is the one correcting you 😭

and your just like?? excuse me?? it was just a mispronunciation🙄☝️

but he doesn’t let it go and teases you >:(

┆彡 SEUNGKWAN [ 승관 ]

he straight up asked you one day to teach him some (language name) bc he thought it sounded cute <|3

and you’re like 🥹 yeah 🥹

but uh, he’s not a very patient student and gives up quickly 😭😭

but it’s okay!! he tried n also has a busy schedule so it’s understandable

nevertheless, he still adores when you speak your mother tongue

esp when you call him nicknames sigh

however our lovely boo kind of forgot how the written letters vary from spoken words

“what are you doing?” seugkwan hummed intrigued upon seeing you scribble something on paper. you looked up and met his soft gaze.

“oh, this? this is a crossword! korean ones are still too difficult for me so my friend sent me a couple of those in (language name)” you explained and tapped the paper with the tip of your pencil. he frowned, looking at the letters in brackets

“what the fuck” kwan grunted confused. not only he didn’t recognise some of the letters but it was also the fact that they were going vertically. you scoffed and let out a sudden gasp, filling in a new word. seungkwan watched you amused, how swiftly you wrote down the letters on paper “what is it?”

“it’s umm, a historical reference. a surname of one guy, you know” you hummed. seungkwan sat down next to you and watched you fill the crossword, occasionally translating the questions and words you put in while you explained what they meant and why were they the answer.

in no time this turned into a couple activity: sometimes like this, sometimes he did a korean one and you watched, sometimes you solved them at the same time - him in korean, you in your mother tongue

he learned a lot of words thanks to this

and he has the cutest accent ever like i swear 🥹

seungkwan loves watching soap operas too like he lives for the drama

often repeats (shouts) what the characters are shouting too LMAO

so you’re chilling and suddenly you hear “get out of my house! now!” with his accent

also watches movies n animations in (language name) to learn some new words

he knows all the disney songs in (language) and majority of them he knows by a heart <\3

so you just sometimes blast let it go or under the sea in (language name) and sing along >_<

┆彡 VERNON [ 버논 ]

this menace

he’s so chill about it

secretly loves when you accidentally sneak some words in your language it’s just so adorable

or when you forget a word and try to describe it… n then you give up and say it in (language name) just to see him smile <\\\\3

he decided that he’ll learn some random words??? like for example he just likes how umbrella sounds in (language name) so he just?? learned how to spell and say it

and uses it in random moments too like he’s so goofy <\3

you were casually chatting with his members, a raging discussion about whether mint chocolate ice cream is such a controversial topic in your country as well.

“i wouldn’t say so? people don’t… really care? a lot of people i know like it, actually! a bigger dispute would rather be some casual stuff like, do you sleep in socks or not… or which goes first: cereal or milk” you explained, looking at vernon. you could almost hear gears turning in his head, knowing what’s about to come

“toothpick” he said in (language name) suddenly, causing everyone to look at him confused. you started laughing at how serious he was when he said it; he started laughing too, it was simply contagious.

his friends looked at you completely flabbergasted, not sure what happened.

“i think they officially lost it” minghao mumbled, a smile creeping on his lips as you and vernon laughed like maniacs.

he always finds the most unfunny memes funny, like it could be even a meme from 2015 and he’d laugh

sends them to you too

and surprisingly?? he’s on track with the newest memes in your country like??

will know the most basic phrases too but sometimes mixes them

do you hand him a piece of orange bc he asked you to and then he goes “goodbye”

and you’re like?? 😭

but he tried okay?!

┆彡 CHAN [ 찬 ]

chan is super hyped about hearing you talk in (language name), it just amazes him how easily you switch between languages

but he never asked u to speak to him bc he didn’t want to feel you pressured or something

but whenever at home you just forget a word he loves when you say it in (language name) even if he doesn’t understand shit

or when you’re just so excited and into a convo and you don’t notice that you sneaked a few foreign words :”)

he always repeats them after you quietly ^_^

one day though, he’s just feeling soft and tired and his brain shut off

“y/n… can you say something in (language name)?” chan whispered suddenly, forcing his eyes to open and peek at you. you hummed, pushing some stray strands of hair that fell onto his forehead. laying on your sides but facing each other, chan noticed how your cheeks flushed pink.

“well… you’re not going to understand me anyways but… i love you. so, so much. i’m so grateful to have you in my life, you make me feel at ease. i can’t imagine my life without you…” you hummed and he noticed how your voice broke when you started the next sentence “and it hurts me to see when you put too much pressure on yourself, baby. you think you’re not good enough but to me, your members and your fans… and literally everyone else, you are. you so are, channie…”

he panicked once you teared up, fully awake. chan pulled you closer, calming you down

“i’m sorry” he mumbled, heart breaking at the sound of your sobs. you just scoffed, shaking your head

“don’t apologise, i just love you so much” you mumbled into his shirt and he swore he was about to melt.

i feel like deep down he knew what you meant <\3

anyways,,

if he hears about one (1) event even slightly connected with (country name) he’ll drag you there so you can feel at home for a moment (as if he’s not your home) and also translate some stuff for him

absolutely loves when you call him nicknames in your mother tongue, like

you could call him the goofiest and cheesiest nickname and he’s squealing like a teenage girl

but then he calls you the same or finds some new nicknames on the internet

sometimes to make you laugh or confuse he’ll put a sentence or a question to google translate and it’ll just… translate it so bad

“what do you mean ‘where’s the broccoli dog??’” you frown and he just laughs his ass off bc 1) it mistranslated OR 2) he purposely put some silly stuff to make you puzzled

[ masterlist <3 ]

taglist.  @geniejunn ,, @luvhyun3 ,, @starlostseungmin ,, @elviransworld ,, @jnks6r ,, @sieunsgf ,, @ethereallino ,, @laylasbunbunny ,, @duolingofanaccount ,, @slytherinshua ,, @stxrseungs ,, @ka-ni-ma ,, @iliveforlixie ,, @ameliesaysshoo ,, @dazzlingligth ,, @mark-geolli ,, @l3visbby ,, @w3bqrl ,, @ddeonudepressions ,, @yourfavoritefreakyhan ,, @cinnamoroxie ,, @kazmura ,, @primoppang

[koolades-world]

making a part two for my solomon birthmark fic because i was already tempted and 1 (one) person agreed with me lol. shoutout to my birthmark twin @mahi-does-obey-me. i know i said i'd post something else today but the temptation was too great. i worked on this instead of doing my data analysis for my lab lmao <3

part of this was partially inspired by me actually missing a couple birthmarks on myself because I just forgot, or didn’t know they were there until like yesterday lol. just like before, leans suggestive (more so than part 1 i think) but it's very cute. this is probably the raunchiest i'll be getting for a while lol. i feel like i really cooked with this

faded scar

"I don't know about you, but I'm starving." Solomon stretched his arms high above his head. His muscles gleaned with sweat, highlighting his surprisingly toned torso. He scooted to the edge of his bed, and swung his legs onto the ground.

"Can it wait just a few more minutes?" Despite being tired, you sat up and leaned against his back. You threw one arm over his shoulder, and the other was braced against him.

"It can. We can just order in instead." He reached for his D.D.D.

"You were planning on cooking?" You raised an eyebrow.

"I thought it would be cute to present you with a home cooked meal. Because I love you."

"That's alright. You do enough already." You laughed at that thought. You were glad he was deterred from cooking so easily today. You'd like your house to not be set on fire today.

"What do you want for dinner?" You peaked over his shoulder at his screen.

"Can we get Italian please? From my favorite place?" You fluttered your eyelashes at him when he glanced over at you. It worked every time, although you knew you didn't need that extra convincing.

"Of course, my love." He'd do anything you asked him, regardless if that was ordering your favorite food, or abandon the exchange program. It was funny how that worked; a demon started this in order to bring the three realms closer, and as a result, he just brought two humans together that could pose a real threat to what he'd created.

'You're the best!" You pressed a kiss on the back of his neck. He already knew exactly what you wanted, so no more words needed to be said. You studied his back profile. It was littered with countless old scars and pact markings. It clearly displayed the long life he'd lived.

“Sorry about these.” You traced your fingers over the angry red scratches on his back that were beginning to puff up.

“I’ll wear them like the badges of honor they are.” Solomon chuckled.

"You can't do that! The others are going to see." The idea of everyone seeing the marks and connecting the dots mortified you.

"That's not what you said when you gave those to me." He remarked. You smacked his back in response.

"Solomon!" You squealed.

"I can't promise anything." He held the hand that was dangling over his shoulder and kissed it. "Food will be here in about half an hour." He set his phone back down, but he didn't move. He let out a deep breath, and relaxed his back muscles. You watched as the tension left his body.

Neither of you spoke, and instead, you charted each and every mark on his back with your finger. In this searching, you found a line of birthmark down his back. It wasn't very neat, but it followed a pattern, starting at the base of his neck and ending at his hips. Maybe it was a result of all of the magic he'd done over the years, since you'd gathered he didn't know he had them.

"You didn't tell me you had so many birthmarks on your back." As you drew a line from the first to the last mark, a shudder wracked through his entire body.

"And you didn't tell me you had a birthmark on the front of your shoulder, and under your lip." You could hear the smile in his voice.

"I do?" You placed your head on his shoulder, to which he gently thumbed the spot where it must've been.

"How'd you notice that?" You reached up to touch the spot for yourself, not sure what you were expecting to feel.

"The same way you noticed mine. I did a lot of staring at your face for little while." Solomon admitted.

"You stared a lot of other placed too." You playfully rolled your eyes. You went back to staring at his back. You could only think of doing one thing to return the favor of what he'd done for you.

Carefully, starting at his neck, you kissed each and every birthmark, making sure to linger just long enough to make him itch for more. He let out a shaky breath, and seemed like he was suppressing another shudder. You giggled, but didn't stop. "Just remember, food will be here soon." You reminded him of the order he'd placed.

"You're the worst." He sharply inhaled.

"Love you too, baby." You played with the wisps of hairs at the nape of his neck. He squeezed your free hand a couple times, but made no move to stop you. Once you'd made it to the last birthmark, you lingered for a moment, letting your breath fan out over his lower back.

Solomon let out a gasp of what you could only describe as frustration. He threw his legs back up onto the bed, and laid down on his back, yanking the covers over himself. You stifled laughter and draped yourself over his torso. He gave you a peck where he'd pointed out your new birthmark, before letting you settle into him. He checked his D.D.D. quickly for the time.

"We still have twenty more minutes before food gets here." He let you know.

"So that means we have nineteen more minutes of cuddling." You hummed.

"We have fifteen more minutes of cuddling. I need time to put clothes on, dear." You grumbled at his response. You didn't verbally answer, but you knew you could get your nineteen minutes of cuddling whether he liked it or not.

The activities of the day had begun to catch up to you, and you felt your eyelids begin to droop. A couple times, you felt yourself falling asleep, and shook yourself awake, much to Solomon's amusement. You weren't sure how much time had passed before he spoke to you again.

“I think love is being by your side.”

“Huh?” You mumbled, already half asleep.

“When we first met, you ask me what I thought love was. I never answered you.”

“You’re adorable.” You planted a kiss on his neck, since your face was already buried in it.

You were glad you’d chosen him.

[peachyfnaf]

Who are your favorite TSAMS artists?

GOD i have SO many, and i also have the worst memory imaginable!!! hold on let me like try to fuckin compile a LIST

@/polaris-stuff

^ I will never shut up abt polaris' art. she's so good at posing, lighting, texturing, showing emotion, literally the whole shebang. also once every two months or so she drops a piece like this or this or this that leaves my ass FLABBERGASTED ON THE FLOOR and thinking about it SO MUCH for SO LONG. polaris S tier frfr

@/zthesheep

^ Z CAN DRAW SO GOOD SO FAST AND IT'S SCARY. he's also hella talented at animating and pov/perspective-work and his art needs more attention rn or im gonna blow up this whole website

@/turbotasthick

^ GOD. TURBO IS SO FUCKING GOOD AT DRAWING THINGS THAT JUST KNOCK THE BREATHE FROM MY LUNGS. and theyre ALSO good at making things that just make me giggle and be HAPPY. like, the silly goofy bm and noface art they do?? joyous and whimsical, but when they DECIDE TO DROP A PIECE BASED OFF AN OLD VICTORIAN PAINTING THAT WATERS MY CROPS CLEARS MY SKIN AND CLEANSES MY SOUL? ascension

@/meemo32

^ They way they color and render things brings me so much joy and satisfaction, theyre also hella good at posing too. shaking around their doodles in my teeth like a cat

@/crees-a

^ GOD. CRESPA. I LOVE THEIR STYLE SO MUCH AND THEIR FULLY RENDERED PIECES STRAIGHT UP LOOK 3D SOMETIMES. THE SHEER AMOUNT OF DETAIL THEY PUT INTO EVERYTHING THEY MAKE IS ASTONISHING AND THE SPEEEDDD THEY DO IT AT IS SO SKJDFHSHDF YK? also i love how they're just an autism creature incarnate lmao

@/fablekitty

^ fable art soft.... fable art elicits me to me feel warm and fuzzy. looking at her stuff invokes the same feelings from me that those old 2015 fnaf speedpaint videos with fnaf music playing ovterop of them did. calmness and a subtle happiness

@/kuuchaos

^ another one who's specific style/way of drawing the dca just brings me so much joy. im a sucker for people who draw em with 3d noses. also the lighting MASTERRR. style that is so squishable yet so strong. oobleck-like artstyle.

@/milkyshea

^ THE SOFTEST AND MOST HOMELY ART EVER. also i could be wrong so dont quote me on this but i THINK milky draws on their PHONE and that. that is insane. thats coocoo bananas. milky how do u draw like that on your phone. milky what are they feeding you

@/frankie-funked

^ ART STLYE THAT MAKES ME GO "HEEHEE" EVERY TIME I SEE IT. ART STYLE THAT MAKES ME VERY HAPPY AND I LOVE THEIR FULLY RENDERED STUFF. GUYS HAVE YOU LOOKED AT THEIR FULLY RENDERED STUFF??? IT'S FUCKIN' JAW DROPPING AS HELL

@/momokooooooooooooo

^ god i love momoko's human tsams stuff so much. i love the outfits they put the characters in, they're always so creative and have such intricate details in them that i just find myself staring to inhale it all. ALSO CAN BE A PERSON WHO SUCKER PUNCHES ME WITH THAT GOOD ANGST SOUP WHEN THEY SO CHOOSE TO DO SO

@/paaatchm

^ JUST ANOTHER ONE WHO'S ART BRINGS ME JOY AND WHIMSY. their solar design? i love him, especially that one time they drew him with like a steampunk mecha arm. that shit was SO COOL and i just. something about their style is another one that just makes me go 'HHRRHRGRHGGGRHR" /VPOS

@/superstar8bongos

^ what am i to say? it's bongos, we all know that bongos is like. so talented it makes everyone clip through the walls. their way of coloring/rendering is incredible and if i stare at their art LONG enough hopefully i will be able to absorb their skills and have a fraction of their power

@/hazard-c-horror

^ I LOVE. HORROR ART. SO MUCH. HAZARD IS LIKE THE OASIS FOR ME IN THE MOSTLY FLUFF-FILLED/NON-HORROR LAND THAT IS THE TSAMS ARTIST DESERT. they're so good at making things unnerving but also hella cute at the same time? like, their OC, Hazard??? fucking FREAK but also omg thats an OUPPY. also how they do expressions w characters eyes my beloved

@/flufffydestroyer

^ THE best artist on this site to go to if you need to look at some art to perk you up and make you smile. art that is very soft and sweet and loving that will warm you up like hot cocoa on a cold winters day. i love all their trans sun and characters as babies stuff

@/samoftheswamp

^ the best tmgafs/teaps artist on this entire site and i will not be convinced otherwise. i love how they use shapes SO much, and also just their overall. just their overall everything. their puppet-master design??? hello??? put that in a museum

@/marshmallowcat666

^ artist who i have not seen many pieces from but every time i do i just go "!!!" cause' something about the way they color and pose (esp when they do multiple-character pieces) just makes me perk up. joy and whimsy

honest to god i have more but this is already so long im going to end it here solely for the fact that i, tragically, have to do other things than gush about cool artists. punches the air

[totalswag]

all grown up — DREW STARKEY

authors note first off, thank you so much for 100 followers. this was a request from raye, i hope you like it!! ps, i had trouble finding pictures that can fit this fic so these are the pictures i could find, please don't come at me lmao.

summary your daughter going to preschool for the first time and drew and you don't know how to control yourselves because your little girl is growing up but drew is having a harder time accepting it because he cares for his little girl so much.

warnings none just a lot of sweetness and crying 🥹

As a parent, taking your child to school for the first time is filled with a lot of emotions. You want to make sure your child is going into an environment where they’ll have fun, make new friends, and be safe.

It takes eight minutes to get to school. Drew was driving with one hand on the steering wheel and the other softly caressing your hand, while Tatum sat in the back seat staring out the window with her teddy bear in her lap.

“Are we there yet?” Tatum asked softly.

“Almost princess,” Drew answered.

Tatum mumbled underneath her breath, you couldn’t understand what she was saying.

You shed a few tears when you arrived, but you wiped them away because you didn't want to overwhelm Tatum.

"I want to hold your hands," she says, raising both hands in a grasping manner.

Drew and you exchanged glances, giggling at your daughter's request.  

Drew was ready to cry and let it all out just by looking at him. In a public setting, he is great with controlling his emotions. You walked into your shared bedroom the night before to find him on the phone with his mom, crying over Tatum. Drew crying is rare unless it’s something serious.

To be real, you watched home videos of when Tatum was just a baby and balled your eyes out the whole time without knowing Drew stood by the door with his arms crossed.

This morning Drew felt a wave of emotions hitting him all at once again. He doesn’t want you to let you know how much he wants to cry but he has mentioned plenty of times how happy he is of his little princess entering preschool and is growing up so fast.

It was simple to find your way through the school hallways to Tatum's class. The door was open for the kids and their families. The classroom was nicely designed and provided everything a preschooler needs. Tatum grip Drew's and your hands more tightly as you walk around the classroom.

You smiled and pointed to the desk with her name on it, "This is where you'll be sitting."

Tatum slowly releases your hands as you crouch down to look at her. Drew helps her in taking off her backpack and setting it on top of her desk. 

While Drew helped Tatum, you scanned around the classroom, admiring how the teachers made things appear so enjoyable for these kids, who were still crouched. You make eye contact with a young woman wearing a name tag, whom you assume is one of Tatum's teachers. 

"Hello, it's nice to meet you, you must be Tatum?" The young woman smiles and extends her hand. "My name is Miss Eva, and I'll be your teacher this year," 

"What do you say, Tatum?" Drew nudges her softly, whispering.

"Hello, my name is Tatum Starkey," she responds then hides her face in Drew’s neck. 

Drew kisses her head and runs his left hand up and down her back.

Drew and you shake the young woman's hand and introduce yourselves. 

Miss Eva explains to Drew and you about the class and what she and the other teachers will be doing to keep this preschool year fun for the kids. 

Drew kept Tatum close to him, making you want to cry for the two. Drew and Tatum's relationship is unbreakable. His entire life changed for the better the instant she entered the world. He will do anything to protect her.

After Miss Eva walked away, Drew and you told Tatum to walk around the classroom and find a friend to play with before the class starts. 

“I’m so sad, I don’t want her to feel upset the whole time she’s here” you sigh, leaning your head on Drew’s arm.

“Me neither” Drew’s body was tense. You patted his chest to comfort him.

Drew felt like he could break down and cry right now. But, he kept the crying for the car. 

You two watched your little girl walk around the room with her arms in front of her body. She looks at one girl playing with baby dolls in the corner, she walks over, and sits beside the girl. The young girl gives Tatum a kind smile, handing her a baby doll to play with. The two start giggling. 

“The class is about to start, we should get going” you announce, checking the time from your watch. 

“Tatum can you come over here for a second” you call her over, she places the baby doll down, and walks over with a smile.

“That's my new friend, her name is Bella.”

"That's lovely to hear, my sweet girl," you say, trying not to choke, "me and daddy are going to leave because we aren't supposed to be here the whole time." Her bottom lip quivers, and her eyes begin to water. 

"Please don't cry unless you want mommy to cry," you chuckle as you take her hand in yours.

Tatum hiccups, "I don't want you guys to leave me."

You look at Drew with tears forming in your eyes, he nods and makes Tatum look at him.

"Princess, listen to daddy right now; you'll see us in a few hours, and when we pick you up, we'll get you some ice cream to celebrate your first day of preschool." "You'll have so much fun with your new teachers and make so many friends," Drew assures Tatum as he tucks her front strands of hair behind her ear.

When Drew said the word "ice cream," Tatum's eyes lit up. 

"Be good for mommy and daddy, please."

"I will, I love you," she says as she pulls you both into a group hug.

You each kiss her on the cheek and exit the classroom. Her gaze never leaves your figures. She blows you two kisses, like she always does. It’s her way of saying, I love you.

The moment you got in the car you started crying.

Drew gently held your hand as he looked at his wrist, which was a bracelet Tatum made for him. Drew felt a tear fall across his lap. He couldn't stop thinking about how his little princess had grown up. He is grateful to be able to call Tatum his daughter. 

"I love you, Y/N," Drew says when you raise your head from your lap.

He's crying. 

"I love you even more, Drew," she says, leaning over to hug him.

"She's growing up, and we have to accept it," you whisper in his neck, and he nods, crying.

"She's my whole world."

You two have another five minutes together before heading back home to relax.

taglist 🧚🏼‍♀️

@runningfrom2am @winterrrnight @ikisscline @brooklynscherry-z

[gvenevera]

Kuroshitsuji Musical ~ 寄宿学校の秘密 (Secrets of the Boarding School) 2024 ~ VERA’S REVIEW!

Yes you read that right! I’ve had the most fateful chance to watch the very first performance of the newest Kuromyu in Hyogo last Saturday, so I figured I’ll eternalize some of my best memories here.

Before we begin: the LIVE STREAMING is available for the LAST PERFORMANCE, September 29th 2024, HERE! For only 3800 yen, you’ll get to watch it live at home, or watch it later for up to 1 week (October 6th)! Apparently you need a Japanese VPN though, if anyone knows how to navigate the site, please do share.

A few disclaimers from me:

*Anti-shippers DNI. This post barely has any shipping content at all but I don’t like people who harass others over fictional preferences. I’m a shipper, I can’t help being biased for my OTPs.

**Since photos were prohibited in the venue, I’ve included stage pictures featured in official news websites or accounts.

***This is by no means a critical review but merely a fangirl’s ramblings, and I often drew comparisons to the original stage play Kuroshitsuji Musical: Secrets of the Boarding School (2021). For reference, I suggest you watch it first! I intentionally avoided rewatching the 2021 version close to the airing date though, so my memories may not be accurate. Also my Japanese is mediocre so I apologize if there were important dialogues I didn’t catch.

Introduction

I know, sorry for the dilly-dally intro. But I’d like to first stress that ever since I started following Kuroshitsuji in my first year of university (like 9 years ago now lmao), I’ve ALWAYS dreamed to watch the stage musical live in person. When 2024’s performance was announced immediately after the last episode of the anime, I was overjoyed to see that our old cast was coming back.

And it was fate that gave me the opportunity - my scheduled work program this year was set to be in Kyoto AND during September! Needless to say, I had the Kuromyu ticket bought and reserved first, before my confirmation with the Kyoto office or my visa and plane ticket. Priorities, right?

Quick remark on the ticket process: I hit a snag right in the beginning because the ticket reservation website Eplus required a Japanese phone number to sign up. I contacted multiple people (middle school friend whose brother used to work in Japan, another who was quarter-Japanese, several dealer websites with high rate exchanges), until I settled on my roommate’s friend from high school who was currently working there. Many thanks to her and my roommate for the help!

She took care of registration for me - even so the advance sales was a LOTTERY ticket! We fortunately got the lucky draw - I saw many Japanese fans on X who were not so lucky, while others bought in bulk to sell later. Then, I used the online barcode to exchange for a paper ticket when I arrived in Japan on September 1st. That’s when I get to know my seat number - 3rd floor, 2nd row B. A very far position from the stage, but it’s alright because we’re here for the atmosphere anyway!

The performances for the first 2 days were set in Hyogo Performing Arts Center, KOBELCO grand hall. I’ve honestly never been to any kind of music performance (or even concerts) in my life, so I was blown away by the sheer size of the venue.

By 10 AM, the audience was trickling in. I was in awe of the fact that you can tell who was coming in to watch kuromyu - beautiful women dressed in black-and-white tones, many even sporting gothic lolita bows and dresses to keep up with the Victorian England theme. In fact, it felt like the whole of Ikebukuro were gathered here in this very building!

We were ushered into the hall entrance at 11 AM and let me tell you, the crowd was suffocating! In front of the theater, there was a goods section for Kuromyu merch. I’m so glad I took the time to queue up because it seems some of the merch were starting to sell out by the second day. The booth clerk looked perplex to see a non-Japanese customer here though. Here’s how the line looked like, and this was still early before most of the audiences got in:

(We’re not supposed to take any photos but I saw the warning signs too late…Here’s a view from where I was sitting on the third floor.)

I realized then as we were settling in that some ladies around me had binoculars!! Well how was I supposed to know you could bring those here, instead of trying to find those fancy opera glasses!?! Ah well, I was lucky that I’d recently had my prescription glasses updated and the seat to my left was vacant, so I could lean in to see the center better.

The Performance

While it is true that you can barely see the actors’ faces from the balcony seats, it was the grandness of the performance itself that blew me away. For the first time I could see the stage in all its entirety, all the actors dancing in synchronization, and the special effects…oh it had improved A LOT from 3 years prior!

The stage sets for Weston may look a tad “crowded” in the still photo, as compared to the original where they used white backgrounds but in reality, it blended in so prettily with the flashing stage lights. The middle section was a rotating floor and one of my memorable scenes was where Ciel and Sebastian were discussing their plans while crossing the rotating stage, to give the illusion of “strolling across the school grounds.” Sounds like a simple trick but if looked amazing from above.

On to the story itself - the execution actually barely changed from the 2021 rendition, which for me, was a relief! Now I know, some would argue a rerun should add in different elements, because who would want to see the same thing twice right? From past experiences with Kuromyu, the reruns tend to be hit or miss - different actors, different song remixes, voice changes, and so on. For this performance, I could barely tell that the cast (apart from Ciel, Sebastian and Undertaker) were all new members. Everyone got into character flawlessly!

The story of course followed the entirety of the Public School Arc. The script and choreography was almost identical to the 2021 stage musical version. If you would remember, this Kuroshitsuji arc was the first to be portrayed on stage before the anime adaptation - same as previously, they seemed to take inspiration from the manga only rather than the anime.

Some key moments from the play:

The opening sequence was again a recap of the previous arcs - Jack the Ripper (Lycoris that Blazed the Earth), Book of Circus (Noah’s Ark Circus), Book of the Atlantic (Tango on the Campania). I’ve always loved this part because you could tell they slipped in iconic themes from the past musicals.

Perfect Black: the main theme, and my favorite from this stage! I’m so happy to have heard it live! *swoons* Thank god they didn’t do anything weird to remix it. The whole cast dancing together was beautiful! However I thought 2021 did it better with the dramatic light focus on Sebastian during the chorus drop.

Ciel’s Earl of Phantomhive outfit was changed from the glittery blue suit to a blue-green checkered coat this year. (I’d have bought his Earl photoshoot set if I knew it beforehand) Yana-sensei later tweeted that she was the one to re-design it, to better match Eito. Then Eito Konishi himself replied, saying he was honored to play as Ciel Phantomhive, to which Yana-sensei praised his singing and called him “Eito-bocchan” …boy was he fanboying hard over that. He’s one of us!!

Arrival at Weston: I don’t have a comment on the P4 in particular, they were all straightforward from the manga. I think I like Redmond’s character the most here, he looked very pretty with the side-ponytail and while he was a show-off still, he wasn’t as annoying or arrogant as I somehow expected.

A notable interaction: Violet forcing Greenhill to pose for him at the swan gazebo. Greenhill’s actor really looked strained trying to keep an upside down bridge pose (Edward was supporting his back, but kept getting distracted). When he broke the pose and got up, Violet hit him over the head with his sketchbook so hard that the thump echoed through the hall.

As for the Prefect’s Fags: Edward and Cheslock were giving off some suspiciously gay rivals-to-lovers vibes over here. Which I kinda vibed with, I hope they kept the energy into the Blue Cult Arc!

One important thing: they kept the ALL the Fag lines! Which in Japanese accent also kinda sounded like them repeatedly calling each other “Fućk”. Oh how I wish the anime had kept those!

Soma Asman Kadar: now this guy deserves an ovation just for himself. Not only did he kill the role, he was also the funniest! Soma’s song was greatly improved and lengthened with catchier music and dancing - when his troupe “arrived” at Weston, he even dragged Ciel and Clayton to join in. I can’t do it justice, you have GOT to see those two English gentlemen crack the Indian dance moves! His pestering of Maurice Cole was hilarious and he kept exasperating Ciel out of his character, their chemistry was wonderful. I really didn’t expect to get hooked by Soma in this arc out of all people! Too bad Agni wasn’t here.

Maurice Cole’s miniarc - Flawless. Sometimes I wonder if he was an easy character to play just because his character trait is so extremely over-the-top lol.

The library kabedon scene and sebaciel burning Purple House scene didn’t exist. Another scene cut off from the last musical was where Clayton and the Blue House kids were congratulating Ciel on his fag duties and Sebastian took the chance to blend in with them. Sadly that was one of my favorite adlibs.

Ciel’s dream sequence: this was originally in the 2021 musical. After a talk with Macmillain made him revisit his past trauma, Ciel “dreamed” of the cultists, and Sebastian’s close call with Undertaker in BotA. I actually forgot about this part when I watched it in theater - the highlight was sebaciel reenacting the scene in BotA where they reached for each other, the enactment surprisingly gave me the impression of Ciel’s “worry” over Sebastian’s “vulnerability” here. Unlike the 2021 version though, Undertaker didn’t pull Ciel into a bridal carry or referenced the R!Ciel wake-up scene as clearly.

The second half after the break was the long-awaited Cricket Match. Like the previous version, there was no scene of Ciel jumping into Master Michaelis’ arms, but I think they just couldn’t fit that one into the sequence. The cricket songs were mostly the same as the original - with an improvement being them cutting out Red House’s random beauty pageant contest. It actually felt like the cricket match went by faster this time, which was a win in my book. I’ve heard people complain of Kuromyu 2021 being a “Prince of Cricket” musical, hence the bad reviews back then.

The laxative meat pie scene was hilarious. From Sebastian faking it as a student complete with Red House’s uniform, to the team’s diarrhea horrors. Redmond stole the show again, as he was going to help Harcourt in the middle of the field, but tragedy struck which made him deadpan: “Oh. Someone get Harcourt.” Then immediately left the stage lol. The Blue House kids lifted Harcourt out.

The Green vs Purple house battle was the same as last time. I always felt bad to see Cheslock being the only Purple kid doing his best because without any support member cast while Violet was sitting in the grass. But this time, he gave Cheslock a tree sculpture of his bust as a good-job reward! Good for them.

Lastly Green vs Blue. They incorporated the rotating stage again in the last batting when Greenhill accidentally hit Ciel. The end of the match cut straight to the Thames Boat Ride, then they did the Blue House cheering scene after. Sebastian finally got to do his signature bridal carry, awww.

Midnight tea party: the setting was even more beautiful than last time. Undertaker letting his hair fall from his hat was iconic as usual. I was impressed with Master Agares’ fight scenes because his actor looked quite older than his 2021 predecessor. I always liked how they did Derrick Arden’s death in the musical, it felt more anguished from the P4 POV while in the anime, it just felt like a gruesome horror scene.

Final musical number was Ciel-Sebastian-Undertaker chorus during their fight in the garden. Music and choreography seemed to be similar, EXCEPT they somehow changed the iconic “Your life is my priority” scene!!! 2021’s version had me hold my breath as Sebastian had his arm possessively hooked around Ciel and took off his glove with his teeth (seriously, you have to see it yourself). This time they had Sebastian and Ciel reenact the scene on the highest stage instead of front and center, and I didn’t feel as much suspense nor was there any glove-removal from what I could see. It was also a weird placement because they were so far away, and Undertaker should’ve been the one on the top as he did his goodbye pose holding the moon.

We end the story with Sebastian recapping the aftermath with Weston’s students, and finally sebaciel’s conversation back at the manor. Again, Ciel reiterates that Sebastian is the only one who could never lie nor betray his trust. Perfect Black came on as an outro, and I got chills when Sebastian ended the last verse on a raised note!

The curtain call was the experience I’d waited for. Somehow I only realized just then that the actors would do the full call during their finale performance, which was what we got to see in the recordings! That day, after the cast bowed twice, the exit announcement immediately came on but guess what? The audience, including myself, kept clapping all the way through the announcement, it went for so long that the cast actually came out to take another bow! As they returned on stage, most of us also stood up for a standing ovation - according to twitter this doesn’t seem to be a regular occurrence outside of the finale. It felt like a truly wholesome “welcome back” for the troupe and for Kuromyu, especially after the rather harsh criticisms from the previous stage (due to major cast and style changes, even I took a while to bring myself to watch it) and the long break due to the COVID years.

Overall summary

Kuroshitsuji Musical 2024 was a faithful rerun of its predecessor. They succeeded with the musical numbers, new cast, overall adaptation of the story. The settings, props and special effects were wonderfully upgraded. The original cast carried the show: Eito Konishi’s singing felt greatly improved and I thought he carried himself as more mature than his last performance as Ciel. Sebastian’s Toshiki Tateishi had a mesmerizing voice the more I listened to him, he never went out of breath even while dancing or fighting - truly vocals fit for the troupe leader. Kandai Ueda did well as his own Undertaker too, even with Undertaker’s peculiar accent.

My few complaints: I felt like the P4 cast (bar Redmond) could do to have more distinction in their tones and movements. It felt hard to distinguish who was talking at times. The performance seemed to have a faster pacing this time around, and you get less absorbed in certain conversations between the characters, so I wished they’d added in slow scenes here and there. And of course I miss the signature sebaciel moments that I’ve mentioned - granted, this manga arc had always been my least favored because of the lack of sebaciel interactions anyway! So I’d say they did the best with the source material.

While I enjoyed seeing my favorite production performed live with the music blasting through my eardrums, it was the atmosphere that truly made the experience for me. Sitting in the 4-storeys grand hall full of some 2000 Kuroshitsuji fans really pulled me back in time, especially during the standing ovation. I’m so happy to see my favorite series so loved after all these years. I’m sure Yana-sensei could feel it too.

I wish a successful performance for the cast going forward to Tokyo, and hopeful for many more musicals to come!

[madrone33]

I don't know what to say. Thank you. Thank you Jorge. Thank you everyone who sung, and drew, and edited, and worked on EPIC: The Musical because you have all given me something that I will always - ALWAYS - remember and cherish.

I've been on this journey for over a year now, since Halloween 2023 when WolfyTheWitch posted a random short of Poseidon with the coldest musical lyrics I've ever heard. Ruthlessness brought me to this project, to this fandom. I was in all the events my timezone could reach, posted and messaged and freaked out with fellow fans on discord and tumblr and youtube and tiktok and twitch. I scoured the whole internet to find every piece of music, read the interviews, watched every livestream - most notably of which were the Ocean Crowdcast stream, the Circe Stream Crash of 2024, the Policy Violation Stream, and the IRL Odyssey streams XD

I got my family into it and was able to gush and rant and ramble to them about it; I've made so many friends because of this, and entered so many other fandoms too: MHSG, Udad, PJO, Hadestown, JCS, Lucids, DEH, and so many, many more; I've made essays and graphs and spreadsheets and analysis, discussing and picking apart the themes, characters, music details, motifs, lyrics; My voice has grown leaps and bounds because of how much I sing out loud now, I learned the songs on the piano, I started drawing?? I've written almost 112k words of fanfic for Epic, it's insane (and also not written down so much more LMAO). I even went out of my comfort zone and posted some of my writing and my covers which is CRAZY and nerve wracking and really fun!

Each saga I was left completely stunned and awestruck. Each saga I thought "surely, nothing can top this" and yet EVERY TIME I was blown away again the next time. The writing, the singing, the voice acting, the visuals, the orchestration, the lyrics, everything is just- !!!

Jorge. Miguel. Rivera-Herrans. HOW?? It's so good! It's SO GOOD!! And everyone's voices?? Everyone, just everyone is just talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same- THIS MUSICAL IS PURE ART, A MASTERPIECE OF A LEVEL HITHERTO UNKNOWN, THE LIKES OF WHICH MAY NEVER BE SEEN AGAIN. The fact that I was born in this spot in time, able to experience and appreciate and bask in the light of this glorious concept musical?? I am unfathomably lucky, and I thank the musical gods that it is so.

This past year has been one hell of a journey. I laughed a lot, I wrote lmao while actually only internally laughing a lot, I was tired and comforted and excited and anxious, I cried which I'm almost never able to do with media; Every day I would wake up and immediately check my phone for an upload notification, which is how I caught the Livestream today instead of missing it, so phew; I felt burned out sometimes, but managed to catch it and diversify my activities a bit, sinking into something else for a while before coming back refreshed and even more excited; My entire music wrapped this year was Jorge, Epic cast members' independent music, and greek mythology musicals; I watched the fandom grow even more, all the art, the fanfic, the theories, the memes, the friends.

I still don't think it's fully sunk in yet, but the entire musical is out now. It's done. I'm watched from saga three to nine, from Ocean to Ithaca. I've been here, every day, for a year. This is something that I don't think I'll ever experience again. I am so so thankful.

Thank you, Jorge, for bringing this into the world. What would it be, five and a half years now that he's been creating EPIC? He should be so proud, because I'm sure as hell proud. Odysseus finally made it home. The story is over.

But still, as Jorge said - This not the end of the journey, this is just the end of a chapter; the journey goes on!!

And I'll be here, taking that journey with you.

[moremaybank]

IMAGINE (coz you just come back from vacation this sparked this thought lmao)😭😭😭

jj coming to surprise you at the airport after you long vacation and your parents are like look who it is and you just run over to him and it’s so cute🥹🥹🥹

"Come on, guys," you groaned. "If you start walking any slower, I won't see JJ until I'm eighty."

All your parents could do was laugh. They'd known the entire trip that JJ would be surprising you at the airport, since he'd let them know before you'd left. Still, your antics were entertaining, even after the long plane ride.

You all made your way toward the exit for a cab ride home (though JJ and the twinkie would be your ride home), and you were distracted, staring at your phone as you tried to wonder why on earth you hadn't heard from your boyfriend yet. Then, your mom gasped, and your gaze shot up in confusion. There he was, your JJ, with the widest grin you'd ever seen on his face. In a flash, you'd abandoned your suitcase and moved fast on your feet as you ran to him. His arms opened wide for you, and you jumped into them. One of his hands wrapped around your waist, and the other cradled the back of your head as he kept you close.

"I missed you, pretty girl," he breathed, his hold on you tightening as if you remind himself that you were real. That you had finally come home to him.

JJ set you down, and you looked up at him, hands braced on his biceps. His hand found your cheek, and he drew your face closer to his so he could kiss you. You melted into him like it was second nature, your arms looping around the back of his neck.

"You're never leaving me again," he spoke, a mock-serious tone laced in his voice.

You laughed softly. "I'll bring you with me next time."

In response, he pulled you into his arms again. Your face planted against his chest, and he tucked his chin over your head. He could smell the scents of your shampoo and conditioner, and he welcomed the familiarity with open arms.

When he felt that you were pulling away, he only held on tighter. "Just gimme a second," he said. "Need my favourite girl in my arms for a lil' longer. Maybe forever."

You curled up to him more. "I don't know how I survived without you, J."

concepts

[elis-blawg222]

November 8 - Friday

Whew! Caught up at last!! (took me long enough)

Today was actually pretty good. I called Angel before school which made me really happy!! (I love him sm ill sob rn actually). My class wasn't toooo bad. The teacher talked sooo much ugh, but I drew the whole time so it was fine. I made my oc thinnn n pretty, love him. Also we had to go around the room and talk to people for like 30 minutes. 30. (did yk you have 30 minutes??)

It was so nerve wracking, especially because I was unprepared lol. I bet I looked like such a total weirdo with the lack of eye contact I was making, but at the time I was just trying not to break a nervous sweat LMAO.

Then, after my class I went to the library (on call w/Ange) and did an assignment. I went home afterwards because my phone was gonna die, and I needed my charger.

After a bit at home, I went to my next class, and I had a test in this one. It went good I think! We studied beforehand which I'm really grateful for.

We had a break in this class, so I went to walk around for a minute, and during this my mom texted me with:

"Eli

What did u eat today"

...

nothing. So, I said "I had some chicken nuggetss after my class hehe"

to which she responded "No fries no pop. How many nuggets"

GURL. So i was like "I did get some fries lol? and i got 10 why?"

and she just CONVENIENTLY NEVER RESPONDED. UGH.

(but wait theres more.)

After my class ended I went home and got ready for work. I was otp w/Angel (because seriously when am I not?) and he was playing minecraft. It was so peaceful and entertaining to watch and listen to him play- I loved every bit of it. Then, we talked about how we should play together (I ltrly will do anything to idc).

Work was actually ehh, not toooo bad. My dad and friend and her mom stopped by which was nice, and also my hairdresser LOL. They both tipped really well (obviously my dad did but yk).

I went home after what felt like one billion years, I was so so so happy. When I got home I just said a few things about my day like I usually do, and made sure to slip in the fact that I got a free meal at work. Which isn't wrong, I did, but I didn't get anything. I actually am just gonna let my friend get something tomorrow. but they don't have to know all that shhhhhhhh.

Then my mom stopped in front of me and was like what did you eat? and so i repeated myself bc no one listens to me <3

(I told her fried chicken tenders, fries, mac and cheese for context, a very 'me' meal tbh or at least it was)

Then, she was like "how many chicken tenders?" "no drink?" "did you finish it? all of it?" "so then you ate 2 full meals today?"

oh. my god. like. genuinely.

why. is. she. interrogating. me. pls. fucking. leave. me. alone. IM GENUINELY MORTIFIED AND HONESTLY IM SO AGGRIVATED. LET ME STARVE IN PEACE HOLY FUCK.

I tried to act like a normal person and be like ??? why are you interrogating me? BC WHY ARE YOU (as if I'm not literally starving myself)

She was just like "because I need to make sure you're getting nutrients." ok girl.

Then, I went to my room and she went to bed. I cleaned my room a bit and did a homework assignment, so I'm pretty proud of myself.

Also if you couldn't tell by now I fasted today. I was gonna either 48 hr fast or do 2 24 hr fasts back to back, but I think I'm just gonna do around 36 hrs. I wanna eat in front of my mom tomorrow so maybe she'll start leaving me alone (I seriously doubt it).

It just gets really frustrating when every meal I have she thinks isn't enough, even when I'm genuinely full. I can't eat like I used to like I physically cannot, she has to get that.

Anywho, I was thinking of making some cucumber boats tomorrow, I think it'll be fun.

Total Steps: 6.7k

Look at me meeting my step goal for once. I'm gonna start really making an effort at meeting it!

'Til tomorrow :)

(P.S. actually getting activity on these makes me so nervous but haiii)

[ynbabe]

Lockwood & Co. Incorrect quotes, pt.6

Before Lucy 

Y/n: It’s quick, it’s easy, and it’s free: pouring river water in your socks! Anthony: Why would I do that? Y/n: It’s quick, it’s easy, and it’s free!

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

*The Squad is eating dinner* George: Can you pass the salt? Anthony: *throws Y/n across the table*

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

George, after Anthony did something stupid: You should have realised, Anthony, if Y/n didn't kill you, I would have.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: When will Ted himself...finally show up to the talk? Anthony: The final boss. George: You guys know TEDtalks stands for technology, entertainment, and design talks, right? Y/n: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer!

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony, in love: How do you do that? Y/n, after having done something dumb: I'm fearless. George, having introduced the idiots and now regretting it: When we were kids, I saw you run from bees. You flailed around and tripped over a chair. It was both hysterical and sad. Y/n: I'm mostly fearless.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: My aesthetic is "would be sentenced to the chair by DEPRAC."

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: Who hurt you? Anthony, always on the edge of a mental breakdown: *snorting* What, do you want a list? Y/n, pulling out ALOT of iron/silver weapons: ...Yes, actually.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?! Y/n: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long line of violence. Anthony: Oh... George, from across the room: *from across the room* I don’t understand how you keep forgetting that.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: It’s not gonna work, I’m not a snitch. George: Fine, let's try something else. Tag a friend you recently committed a crime with. Y/n: Lmao, @Anthony.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony: I hate you. Y/n: Well, according to this picture I drew of us holding hands, that is untrue.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony, after a fight with Y/n: The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was changing her name to Y/n.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n, grave-robbing: I’m going to hell. Anthony, there for a case: Probably. Y/n: I'll pick you up? Anthony: *nodding* Carpool.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony, pissed : Y/n! I thought you were dead! Y/n, back after running away for a year: No, just in deep cover. Anthony, about to lose his mind: ...But it was an open casket. Y/n, little scared now: It was very deep.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: Hold on, I can explain! Anthony: Really? Can you now? Y/n: I can if you give me a minute to think of a convincing lie.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Since Lucy

George, trying to joke: Hey, Joe said he's coming over this afternoon. Y/n, expecting a ‘delivery’: Cool. George: Do you know who Joe is? Y/n: JOE MAMA! Anthony, not even looking up from his phone: Damn, that backfired.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n, just back home: Do you cook? Lucy: I made a cake once. Anthony: Yeah, it was good. Lucy: Really? Anthony: Don’t make me lie twice, Luce.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n, back from sneaking around for state secrets: Anthony! For the love of god, please turn down that music. I have a hangover. Anthony, pissed at her: *blasting the mii theme at full volume* That sounds like a you problem, not a mii problem.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony: For most of human history, vehicles had automatic collision avoidance and could even take you home if you were asleep or drunk. But then we got rid of the horse. George: You complete moron. You stupid fucking idiot. "Cars would be better if they could bite and shit" – that was you just now, dumbass. George: "Wouldn't it be cool if cars could piss? Wouldn't it be cool if cars could fuck?" Fuck off. Y/n: It would be cool if cars could fuck. Lucy: We... We still have horses.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Anthony, to Y/n, since they’re sharing a room,: I'm leaving for the weekend, so I hid 100 dollars in your side of the room for food. Clean your side and you will find it.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Lucy: It’s funny how well you and George get along. Didn’t they hate you at first? Y/n: George hates everybody at first. It’s their way of reaching out to people.

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: I just found out from Lucy today that when I ‘died’ and George threw my weapons in the grave, Anthony said, “You should aim one at the coffin to be sure.”

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

Y/n: I give up. I am so tired. George: Get the emergency supply! Lucy: *carries Anthony and throws him in front of Y/n* Anthony: *smiles* Y/n: AND I AM BACK BABY, LET’S GOOO

[lostinlewis]

Are you in the mood for angst/cheating tonight?? 😭

Im currently listening to moth to a flame and the lyrics “does he know you call me when he sleeps, does he know the pictures that you keep..” is so stuck on my head. Could you try to base something on that.. lmao?😭

Baby, you know I am always in the mood for angst hehe...I wanted to make this toxic but instead it is just filled with angst.

Mature.

Words: 2.2k

It had become quite the ritual that as you sat across the dining room table from a man you considered to be the great love of your life, the man who brought you peace in a life built from chaos, a man who let you escape from it all and gave you the shelter to really be you, that your phone would be a distraction that neither one of you could ignore; your husband had a knack for knowing when to ruin the mood. 

“Answer it, it might be important…” 

There was an annoyance in Lewis’ voice that you couldn’t ignore, a tone that was quite the contradiction to his words. Sure, he was telling you to answer your husband's call but he was also telling you that if you did, it would come at the cost of his happiness. The great battle you fought constantly, keeping your lover happy whilst also playing the role of someone's wife too. 

“Sorry, I’ll make it quick I promise.” 

You left your seat in a hurry, waiting until you left the room before you answered what was now the fifth call of the hour, careful to not let your husband even so much hear Lewis’ breath in the same room as you, should it raise suspicions. 

“What’s wrong?” 

It was silent in the background of the call and for a moment you wondered if you had been caught, if he was calling to confront you about your illicit affair, or even if the man you were legally tied to was doing the same as you, standing in the house that wasn’t his own as his lover sat in a room nearby, not that you even cared. 

“The babysitter called, she has to leave in an hour, can you make it home in time?” 

You felt a sunken feeling in the pit of your stomach, you had been so looking forward to this night having not been able to get away for close to a month now, the need to be alone with Lewis for the night, for the whole night, had become quite overwhelming recently. 

“I don’t know, can’t you?” 

Your words were pathetic really, of course you could make it home in time but you didn’t want to, not a single part of you wanted to go home, to go back to your normal life, you had only just gotten a taste of freedom, a reminder of who you were when you weren’t mum and when you weren’t someones wife, surely you deserved a night off too?

“Babe I am at a work function you know how important my job is-” 

Your husband hadn’t stopped his sentence short, Lewis’ hands on your hips from behind forced you to stop listening. As you held the phone loosely to your ear now, you felt his lips tease the nape of your neck, ever so softly placing kisses on every inch of your bare skin whilst his hands began to roam across the material of your dress, cupping a breast with one hand as the other drew lines of seduction across your midriff. 

“Hello? Are you still there?” 

It was your husband's voice that brought you back to reality harshly, no longer had the touch from the man standing behind you kept you hostage in his world, you were given such a harsh reminder of the world in which you actually resided, a world in which you had grown to resent. 

“Sorry, yes…The signal is bad I think…Do I really need to go home?” 

There was an element of desperation in your voice now, pleading with him to grant you permission to escape for just a little longer despite how awful what you were doing was, you felt it was the least you deserved. 

“Tell him you’re not leaving…” 

Lewis whispered the words into your free ear, barely audible yet it scared you all of the same. Pulling away from him, you turned to face him instead and saw the look of darkness in his eyes, he wasn’t going to let you leave easily. 

“Okay fine, I will say my goodbyes and head home…yeah sure, see you tomorrow.” 

There were no niceties, no signs of affection when it came to your husband, that had long since disappeared if it was ever really there at all. 

“I’m sorry Lewis, I-I-” 

Not allowing you to finish the sentence, he pulled you to him once more, resting both hands on your hips as he kissed you with a passion you had only ever felt with him. 

“Do you want to go?” 

His words tickled against your lips as he dared you to leave him when he could taste how desperately you wanted to be with him. 

“No, but-” 

“Baby we don’t do buts around here, come with me…” 

Lewis took you by the hand and gave you no option but to follow him down his seemingly never ending hallway, a silence only broken by your footsteps and weighted with anticipation breaths. 

“Sit with me.” 

Inviting you into his body with an outstretched arm, Lewis laid back on the corner of his sofa, space enough for two. 

“But I have to go…” 

His smile was unwavered by your admission, still he asked you to join him on the sofa with his open body, how could you ever refuse?

“When you are here with me there is nothing you have to do, everything is a choice baby…” 

Lewis welcomed your body against his warmly, wrapping his arms around your entirety, he pulled you closer to him somehow. 

“...Give me ten more minutes with you and then I will drive you home myself.” 

He wasn’t waiting for permission, not now that his time with you had been cut so short. Lewis unwrapped his arms from you as his lips met your neck once more, his hand dancing down the inside of your thigh to so carefully pull them apart. 

“I hate that I have to share you with him…” 

Your eyes were closed and your breath was laboured as you felt every single nerve in your body stand on edge, your senses driven mad by the touch of his soft lips against your neck and his fingers gently stroking the outside of your panties. 

“I hate that I only ever get to love you in secret…” 

A gasp left your lips as you felt the pad of his finger tease through your folds with the aim to find the spot that always made you putty in his hands, and he found it with ease. Your head fell back against his shoulder as he stroked circles that told of how much of an expert he was in your pleasure, no longer could he multitask with kisses, he could now only watch your face contort with deep satisfaction, he looked on with pride mixed with love, knowing that in that very moment in time you were his, only his. 

“You know I will wait for you as long as it takes…look at you, so beautiful…I will wait for you always.”

His words felt like a soft poem being read to keep you teetering on earth whilst his touch dared you to rise above it. You were never one to care for religion, nor were you particularly spiritual, but in that moment, when you were at your most vulnerable with Lewis, you felt he was a God, it was the only way to explain how a man could know your body and know how to make you feel better than even you could. 

“I don’t want to let you cum baby, I want to keep you here for as long as possible…” 

It still amazed you that he knew when orgasm was close without you ever telling him, but he knew, he always knew. 

“Please…please…oh my-please…” 

You begged him for release, you begged him to make you feel like only he could, but at the same time you were begging him to let you go. 

“I want to let you baby, I really do…but I don’t want you to go, I want you here with me…always.” 

The moan you let out as you felt his words penetrate your skin was born from pleasure but mostly frustration. You needed a release, sure, but most of all you needed him to know that there was not a single part of you that wanted to leave him too. 

“Please…” 

It was that plea that did it, the singular plea that was more of a whimper than a word. Neither one of you were sure who exactly you were asking for more, the orgasm or the permission to go home, but either way, Lewis knew he could keep you no longer. 

“There you go baby, there you fucking go…” 

His voice was husk with admiration now, the weight of his desire to be inside you made the words catch in his throat as he watched you fall apart right there in his lap, the ability to both make you lose control and to provide you shelter to do so unabashed made him burst with pride. 

“Thank you, Lewis.” 

Your voice was nothing more than a tired whisper now, words you forced yourself to speak through sheer emotional exhaustion as you stayed wrapped in the loving arms of the man who promised you a world you would never be able to live in. 

-

Lewis had given you a moment to freshen up alone, allowing you to fix your hair and your dress in the bathroom shielded from his view, knowing that you always took a while to readjust to the ‘other’ you once you had been with him but also knowing how crucial it was that you did. 

It took you by surprise that he was still sitting in the state you had left him in, typing away on his phone, not in any way looking like he was ready to leave the house. 

“Did you change your mind? Should I call a cab?” 

It was then that Lewis stood, it was then that you noticed it was your phone he had in your hand not his, and there was a look of intent on his face as he handed it to you. 

“No need, I spoke with your husband, you’re not leaving.” 

You felt your world crash down around you as his words registered. What had he done? 

“You what? Lewis, fuck…why would you do this?” 

You saw the look in his eyes that told you he was toying with the idea of letting you stew a little longer, like there was a little part of him that enjoyed your distress, as if it was akin to revenge for how often you put him last.

“Relax, I messaged him as if I was you. I told him you had car trouble and that the mechanic wasn’t going to be able to get to you until morning and so you had to stay the night with a friend…” 

The smile on his face was smug, like he was ahead in a competition and the prize, you, was closer than ever to being his. 

“You have no right to do that.”

Shocked by the annoyance in your voice, Lewis screwed up his face as he looked at you. 

“Well it was the only way I could get you to stay here, I thought you’d be happy, I thought you wanted to be here?” 

“I do…of course I do…just, you’re not like him, you don’t try to control me, what if he guessed that it wasn’t me that was messaging him? What if he found out about you?” 

Lewis rolled his eyes ever so slightly as he took you by your waist once more. 

“Then I guess I would finally have you all to myself…” 

“It’s not as easy as that, you know it isn’t. I have a life, I have kids…I can’t just leave that all behind because I am in love with the man who I happened to meet last.” 

“I would never ask you to leave any of that behind baby, what you have is what you are and I would love and accept your life and your kids as if they were my own.” 

“I can’t leave him, Lewis…I can’t…” 

Pulling you into a hug the very moment he saw the upset on your face, not allowing the tear that slid down your cheek to land anywhere but on his shirt, Lewis held you as if the words you had not yet spoken weighed you down terribly. 

“I know you are not ready to leave him, I know. I told you I would wait for you and I will, I will wait for you forever if that is what it takes, but just know the moment you are ready, this…all of this…” 

He signalled to the house that you were both standing in as he spoke, a symbol of all that his world really was.

“...will be ready to welcome you home. I have so much space for you, for your kids…I have so much love to give too. And maybe you will never be ready to leave him, maybe the thought of it is a little too scary, but I will wait for you nevertheless. I will wait for you right here, ready for the chance to love you how you truly deserve, finally.” 

[starshaped-dreamer]

intoxicating (l.dh)

pairing - lee donghyuck (haechan) x GN!reader

genre - fluffy fluff, suggestive?

warnings - makeout scene lmao

w/c - 607

a/n - god the hyuck brainrot is real I have like 8 WIP's which are my attempts of not just writing haechan comfort fics but they just aren't coming out right so I apologise in advance for how many stories I post that are like this.

please request here if you have anything you'd like me to write!

"I still can't believe you didn't get me tickets for your concert." You pout, turning away from him as he tries to give you your kiss hello.

He laughed, tugging your arm. "I didn't know you wanted to go! I would've loved to have you there, but you've got to tell me when you want me to get you tickets."

You finally met his eyes, only to show him your phone. "Well, I'm still blaming you for the fact the only way I can watch it is through the tiktok thirst traps everyone is posting of you."

He smirked, sitting down beside you on the bed. "Oh, so you're jealous, is that the problem?"

"Well, all these people that would kill to have you as their boyfriend got to watch you live while your real partner had to sit at home by themselves. I may be a little bitter."

He raised an eyebrow teasingly. "Wow, you really are jealous. I never thought you'd get so worked up over this. You literally see me 'live' every day."

You playfully smack his shoulder, turning over on the bed to face away from him. "You're being mean."

Haechan laughed, pulling you back towards him. He laid beside you, taking your face in his hands. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. I'll buy you tickets next time."

Your face lit up excitedly. "To the 127 concert?"

He grinned. "You just want to watch me perform 'Love on the Floor', don't you?"

Now it was your turn to tease. "Actually, I want to watch Johnny perform 'Love on the Floor'."

Haechan gasped, releasing your face from his grasp. "Wow, I didn't think you'd betray me that easily. Maybe you should pay for your own ticket. Or you could even ask Johnny to pay."

You giggled. "Who's jealous now? You know it's only you I want to watch. Please Hyuck?"

He smiled, his hands returning to cup your face. "You're lucky I love you. And you're pretty cute when your jealous."

You smiled in satisfaction, pressing a chaste kiss to his lips. Not content as you pulled away, he brought his lips to yours again, deepening the kiss. His tongue swiped your bottom lip for entry, slipping inside your mouth as his hand came to rest against your waist.

Your hands came to rest on his shoulders as he pulled away for a moment, breathless as he pressed kisses to your jawline and collarbone, before returning to your lips.

Time stilled around you, as it always did when you were kissing Haechan. All you could focus on was him, the lingering scent of his shampoo in his hair, the soft, yet thin material of his shirt under your fingertips, the way his hand moved quickly, yet gently from your waist to your hair and to your jaw. Everything about him was intoxicating in the best way possible, and moments like this when you could just get lost in him were your favourite.

He finally pulled away, panting as you both tried to catch your breath. He drew you impossibly close, tucking you under his chin as he traced shapes on the skin underneath your shirt. You laid there quietly, playing with his fingers as you concentrated on his slowing heartbeat. You looked up, eyes tracing over the sharp features of his face, his beauty marks creating the most gorgeous constellations across his skin.

He noticed you staring, looking down at you with a questioning glance. "What are you looking at?"

You smile. "You're so pretty, Haechan."

His face mirrored your expression as he fixed a stray piece of your hair. "As are you, my love."