#no we never spoke
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mourning the moot loss
#no we never spoke#no i dont have anything better to do#im just a teenage girl actually...#kats chattin shit
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I spent 2 hours with a friend yesterday and she opened my eyes to the potential of Gortash oc's.
Im running with the idea but in the blandest possible way and idec. But like. Pretty girl he sees when he's like 7 at his parents cobbler shop getting shoes. Oh no she's a noble. He's haunted by his crush for the next 20 years. Excited to show off his new Archduke status to her. She's routinely unimpressed by him.
She's probably annoyingly nice and like funds charities and shit. Going in to politics to help people. He hates her. She knows more legal stuff than him and makes him look dumb. He's an artificer genius, and it makes her look dumb. She'll never be able to accept his moral bankruptness, and he'll always be devestated about it.
#brekkie personal#rambles rambles rambles#she's gonna be so cute and have precious curls#idk maybe she is on track to becoming a duke and he swoops in out of nowhere and shes like who is this punk#and hes like what do you mean you dont remember me ive been in love with you since i was 7#no we never spoke#no you never learned my name#but i plotted my 30 step plan to marrying you by the time i was 12#i was in hell at the time btw#it kept me going#and shes just like slow blinking at him#like ok weirdo#and goes back to her law text books cause she actually is taking being part of the legal system seriously
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the most difficult thing about growing as a person socially, as in getting out of your shell and noticing that you are, is that there will still be times when it doesn’t feel like you’ve grown at all! times when you can’t really connect with anyone around you, times when you fail to enter into an existing conversation, times when you say the wrong thing (or nothing at all when in hindsight you probably should’ve). but that’s also kind of the best thing, because that’s the thing that helps you realize that sometimes, it’s not you or your lack of skills or any shortcoming. sometimes certain environments just aren’t for you and certain people aren’t your people, and that’s okay. that’s human. it’s okay to not feel the progress you have made all the time.
#and that goes for every type of growth#backstory of this post:#after I came back after a few months of doing my international internship I felt so much more confident#it was easier making friends and walking up to people#i took more chances#and generally just heard it a lot from those around me who kept telling me how much i’d changed#this was further supported by my first office job that went pretty well#but then came my grad internship. and while i love the work and have met some great people I noticed it was difficult again#there was one office lunch where no one spoke to me at all! it was my first week and I didn’t know what to say#if i should even say anything#we were all sitting at the same table#not one person even glanced my way#it made me doubt myself; i was doing so well before#was that even real? why can’t I just speak up? this is not the way to connect with people#especially in my first week!#but you know what#i was still doing well. i just had to factor in the fact that these were all middle aged people talking about reality shows i didn’t watch#and bikes i knew nothing about#as well as people who knew i was the new intern yet didn’t speak to me at all even though I’d introduced myself to them all individually#and even so#people I couldn’t really talk to about MY interests outside of work either#my point being:#it’s okay to not feel a connection with everyone you meet#it’s okay to fall back into old habits even though you’ve developed new ones#it will never unravel the process you’ve made and the connections you’ve built#you’re doing fine#after this internship I will surround myself with people who reaffirm that belief#growth in the self#self love#positivity
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ok i swear i'm not going to talk about my breakup forever but the thing that just keeps bothering me:
i know that not getting what you need in a relationship is a COMPLETELY valid reason to end it but also. i feel like having a very vulnerable moment where i opened up about my struggles with intimacy and being relieved that i didn't have to keep doing things i wasn't comfortable with, then being dumped a YEAR later because of my lack of intimacy. is something i should be allowed to be very hurt by???
#ramble#sorry i'm currently in a phase of 'of course this happened' and 'oh i deserve this because i didn't give him what he wanted'#like he knew i was grey ace since the start. and he let it go on for SO long after i said i might be vaguely aro as well#if that's a dealbreaker for you bc of your love language then FINE but NIP IT IN THE BUD#he said he put it off because he didn't want to hurt my feelings but it only hurt me MORE#like you're an adult. grow the fuck up and communicate like one#holding your negative feelings in hoping somebody notices you're hiding them is what TEENAGERS do#and also i told him VERBATIM: i didn't think anyone would ever love me because i'm not comfortable with xyz. and he just confirmed that#idk i still feel like i'm being selfish because how could i expect someone to be in a relationship with me when i can't give them anything#also tmi but it's not like we did NOTHING. we still held hands/cuddled/were close. he just didn't have his tongue down my throat anymore#so obviously i'm assuming by 'missing affection' he just meant sex and as an ace person that just fucking sucks#also oh my god i HATED how much he would imply we were going to have sex. i would have to keep SAYING 'i don't like doing this'#he always spoke like it was inevitably going to happen and it didn't click how GROSS i felt about it until recently#also ALSO not to go there but i never told him WHY i struggle with it (it's sensory issues)#and like. what if something had happened to me that made it hard for me and i just wasn't ready to tell him. and then he did this#again sorry to overshare this is still just a lot for me and i have no idea if i'm being unreasonable#if you're ace and in a relationship please let me know bc i'm starting to think it'll end this way every single time
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gojo telling any other sorcerer who is interested in you that they can just fight him for you if they want you so bad
like what are they gonna do??? fight him????
#based off of a dream I had about him saying that to kusakabe#poor guy was like ‘is kendy seeing anyone 👀’ and gojo grinned and was like ‘why? interested’ and he was like yeah kinda and gojo was like#okay meet me outside we can fight for her and kusakabe never spoke to me again#tfw ur bf is creepy#kendy says
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i absolutely hate the theory that ella did the prank. its so out of character for ella, and it misses the whole point of their friendship and it just feels.. so shallow? bridget can still feel betrayed without ella having to pull that. and its clear from the movie that bridget felt that way because she felt like she was abandoned by ella in a time when she needed her the most
#ella x bridget#shes more affected by that than the prank itself bc her friendship with ella was all that she had#and its just so much more meaningful that way#ella was the only one that truly understood her and stuck by her side#and ella would literally never humiliate bridget like that?? did we not watch the same movie#the way ella spoke abt her?? are u kidding#descendants#descendants 4#descendants rise of red#glassheart#bridget x ella
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good morning here are some things that i just never really got around to posting
#we are so back enoch nation#im going to be completely honest with you all here he’s kind of like the only tgaa character that really spoke to me#sure i really enjoyed herlock and barok quite a lot too but there is just something about him#he is just so… me. like even in the flesh.#theres just something so distinct and unique about him that i have never seen before in another aa character before and i really#resonate with it#there is just a certain aura to him#i could go on but i’ll save that for another time i suppose. these tags are starting to become convoluted#and i probably sound insane#the great ace attorney#dai gyakuten saiban#ace attorney#enoch drebber#aa#dgs#tgaa#shit i draw#i miss him a lot#i also thought that today would be a proper day to post all of the drawings of him i accumulated over the past month or so#enochposting
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reading the autobiography of a damn liar means having to cross-reference absolutely every little throwaway anecdote to the point where you look somehow even more insane than him
#johnny cash to the LA times: yeah haha mike came over to my new lake house to shoot the breeze :)#mike: NUH UH johnny cash actually came to MY HOUSE!!! btw we are BEST FRIENDS and PHILOSOPHERS also.#it’s literally like#michael nesmith one second: celebrity psychosis makes you think you know people when really you only said hi one time and never spoke again#michael nesmith the next: yeah i think my meeting of johnny cash really influenced him and provided a pivotal experience in his life
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sqh cooking his own noodles in the dead of night, hunched over the stove. mbj has served him 7 bowls of frozen noodles in the past 2 days. he's paranoid, every sound making him jump. he really doesn't want to hurt mbj's feelings. he finishes his noodles. he takes them off the stove, they freeze instantly. he lets out a single tear. that's what you get for trying to cook hot food in the northern kingdom. it occurs to him in that moment that maybe he should get mbj to take them on vacation. unbeknownst to him, mbj has been watching this whole time, hoping sqh has figured out how to get around the instafreeze. when the noodles freeze, all his hope are dashed. he considers that he should maybe take sqh on vacation. neither of them ever bring up the vacation.
#svsss#sqh.txt#moshang#they both think they've brought up the vacation#but never actually got around to it#meanwhile the truth is that they just keep forgetting#and sometime in the future sqh goes oh what about that vacation we were going on#and mbj goes oh yeah. we should maybe get around to that#they never spoke about it before this at all
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If this is just a small peek of what we could've had for rwrb1, imagine what we'll get for the sequel 🥴
#never imagined i wouldve spoke the word “rwrb1” ever in my life#cuties patooties clapping#theyre 3 yo you can't change my mind#the potato quality is not my fault#but i apologize#we overcomed the clown music people im so proud#we knew we'd get fed at some point#red white and royal blue#rwrb#rwrb movie#rwrb sequel#firstprince#alex claremont diaz#henry fox mountchristen windsor#nicholas galitzine#taylor zakhar perez#tzp
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I wish childhood friends were real…
#bakudeku#miritama#bkdk#I have them#but they all grew up to suck#one of them fucked me and never spoke to me again after 9 years of friendship💀#and the other one is just toxic#like sending me money unsolicited and then getting mad when I hang out with a different friend kinda toxic#and then guilt trips me into thinking I’m in the wrong for literally having friends kind of toxic#she gets mad if I take over an hour to reply#i won’t even lie I would’ve preferred a Katsuki Bakugou over this bs#cuz all he did was make fun of deku and tell him to khs#I already had like five people do that to me mf wouldn’t be special#like at least he grew into a better person#I could you not one of the guys that told me to kms as a kid is literally in jail rn for drug dealing#and one of the other ones texts me every few years to ‘see if I’m still a bitch…’#WE ARE 21??? OUR FALL OUT WAS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL??#maybe I’m the problem#or I just attract toxic people for whatever reason#anyways#puff rambles
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February + March unfinished/unposted art
#ok lemme throw down some tags and then I’ll describe teehee#lifesteal smp#content smp#doctor4t#planetlord#pangilive#clownpierce#parrotx2#vort3xdragon#oc: radius#reddoons#ok sick I think that’s jt#Zam isn’t getting tagged sorry he’s not there enough lol#ok!!!!!#tumblr lagging asf for be it’s ok we move on#ok first one planetlord skirt the plan is simple#second one is lovingly called doctor4t leg reveal in my files bc I think that’s fhnny#next is a clownpierce design from a 14pinecones fic!#then parrot earrings from the same file I did spoke earrings in lol . he never made it out 🫡🫡#next Pangi and Red bc their s4 dynamic so funny#the a botched school au . it went through all the hours of the day but only 7am made it out lol#irl Pangi sketch! I’m so enamored w his crew necks gjejfnenf#Vortex design!!!#+ oc design!!!
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Not sure if this theory makes any sense at all but I'm starting to believe that there's no time skip between Wally's phone calls and what we see/hear in the show's Media/Merchandise. If we see the Toyland call being made before the Homewarming episode then it would make sense that Wally's expecting Barnaby to come over soon. As well as the Homewarming sketch from the prior update. (I don't know, still kind of brainstorming this perspective)
that theory Does make sense and i've been considering it! the "timeline" is such a nebulous thing right now because we still... don't really know! there are too many variables and too many Maybes for any solid answer.
maybe the reality that the neighbors live in exists outside of time like you say, and like half of me suspects. there's so much reality fuckery already present, but I'm also... unsure of how much merit this holds given what we know / can infer about how time passes in Home. i'm putting this theory on a low shelf to look at but not prioritize
maybe it really has been 50 years, and Barnaby is either still around / Wally is still in contact with him, or Barnaby... isn't there. who knows, maybe Wally was just verbalizing some Wishful Thinking. i mean, Wally is a bit of an unreliable narrator, isn't he? we can't assume that everything he says is entirely accurate or truthful. and i mean, if it's been 50 years it makes sense that Wally would be pushing for connection / to revive WH. who knows how long he's been trying.
hm... i mean. it could be a mix of that and the Outside Of Time theory. who knows, maybe W is receiving calls from different points in the timeline - Wally may have started out just calling, and has just graduated to invading the WH website / getting pushy with the envelopes and media that's been sent to the WHRP. maybe Wally got tired of waiting for W to respond before W was even born. who's to say!
#i mean. idk the emphasis wally puts on Its So Quiet makes my brain tilt its head#it feels like wally breaking composure before he pastes the Facade back on with '-during homewarming'#that and just the way he phrased 'everyones usually so busy so its just me and home for a long while'#Usually so busy. Usually. why not Always? or Is?#usually.#and then the 'its just me and home for a long while'#the phrasing here has Connotations i think!#homebogging#welcome home speculation#wh speculation#OF COURSE. I HAVE TO DEBUNK MYSELF!#what we hear / see from Wally is - ironically - more genuine than the WHRP's or W's recovered media (save the eddie excerpts)#the WH media shows us the ideal homewarming - where everyone is getting into the spirit and spending time together and the like#but then wally could be telling us what homewarming is Really like - lonely. quiet.#WHICH MAKES SENSE THEMATICALLY! and it mirrors how christmas time is. its marketed as this joyful thing that brings people together#when in reality its lonely and stressful. i know i certainly never feel more lonely than i do at that time of year!#so there's just. layers. right now im simultaneously believing in the time discrepancy And them existing outside of time#im leaning on the first one but you know!#BUT!!! IM CONFIDENT THAT THE HOMEWARMING WALLY WAS CALLING FROM WAS NOT THE ONE WE SAW IN THE UPDATE.#wally spoke with enough familiarity about the time of year to make me think 'hes lived through many of these hasnt he'#it could be that time Has passed for the neighbors and its been many homewarmings.#it could be that it Started as what the commercials/update showed us.#but as time passed maybe it became a time where everyone just... Isolates for one reason or another. so now it's just quiet and lonely#im still rolling it all around in my head! many factors and implications to consider w/ this update!#Take All Of This With A Grain Of Salt As Usual!
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Ink October day 3: Sophistry
An argument that seems plausible, but is fallacious or misleading, especially one devised deliberately to be so.
#khux#khux player#kh player#kingdom hearts#kh#kingdom hearts union x#kingdom hearts player#player my beloved#blue boi draws#ink october#ink October 2024#ink October 2024 day 3#watched a bunch of Player cutscenes for this one and Aug AUHG I love them. I always forget how much of a character Player is#but they are truly their own guy. more then even some non-renameable/customisable game protagonists#the utter guts on this kid to challenge multiple foretellers multiple times,fight both Ephemer and Skuld at the same time-#(both very powerful in their own right),AND attempt and succeeded in tricking four of the personifications of darkness themselves is… wow#they’re such a powerful fighter too. like they kick both Skuld and Ephemer’s asses,and sure they were both not aiming to kill and exhausted#from fighting Ven’s darkness BUT SO WAS PLAYER (as well as having just come from the arcade and those fights)#them fooling the darknesses too… along side their two closest friends… I wonder if there was any noticeable change between their normal#fighting style and the one they used there. Skuld and Ephemer didn’t necessarily see them fighting during the war#(only heartless or against one appoint) so I wonder if they fought like that.#the ‘argument that is plausible but misleading’ here is Player being possessed. with all the information available to them it is plausible#but we know for a fact that player is just straight up lying. making shit up. mimicking how darkness spoke before to pretend. which is ki#kinda hilarious to me like you go girl gaslight gatekeep girlboss. gaslight them into believing you’re possessed gatekeep them from dying to#trap darkness and girlboss by winning. amazing beautiful 10/10#I like to think Ephemer never realised、at least while he was alive. something in the tragedy of him never knowing.#of not recogising his dear friend through their deception. of dying thinking he failed them. that it wasn’t their choice.#and he did fail them in a way. there’s this recurring theme in Kingdom Hearts where the hurt lingers despite the memories being gone.#Player is very much effected by this with their memories of the war being gone but still suffering. Ephemer stands by the decision to hide#it thinking it spares them from the burden but it doesn’t it just takes away the context and they deserve to know what happened to them
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You can go back in time and add one extra Zuko and Katara interaction scene into the show (unfortunately everything else stays the same including the awful canon endgame pairs.) What kind of scene between them would you add?
a post-agni kai conversation.
it always drives me fucking mad that zuko literally throws his life away for katara and then apart from ONE THANK YOU (which is beautiful and perfect, don’t get me wrong, but certainly not enough) they just??? never speak again????? like there is no way in hell katara of all people would just fucking dip after zuko sacrificed himself for her you know she was sitting by his bed 24/7 & changing his bandages & fussing over him day and night & i refuse to hear otherwise.
ideally, i would’ve liked the conversation to be at the jasmine dragon in ba sing se (bringing it full circle from the first time they ever connected in the very same city), out in the balcony before the entire gaang comes to join them and hinting at a future relationship, but since i unfortunately have to keep to canon, i would insert it after the mai.ko “reconciliation” and before zuko’s coronation.
maybe zuko opens up to katara over how nervous he is about becoming fire lord, she reassures him, and then he tells her that he wouldn’t be there without her, and thanks her again — and that segues into them talking about what he did, and why he did it (and if we want angst, we can see the hints of feelings that neither of them yet realize or can admit they have, not till it’s too late) and then we end with another hug just to wrap it all up with a nice bow <3
#zutara#zutara asks#but bc the universe hates us and we can���t have nice things they pretty much never spoke again#and their entire friendship got thrown out the window#i hate it here#anti kataang#anti maiko
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Gifted Drabble - NewAgeAU - Understanding
Hey @spotaus !! As promised :3 I got a little something for you!
Your drabble got me thinking and made me consider something. (also i am so sorry if i got the ages wrong. I really tried)
As always. Feel free to use whatever you want from it or just ignore what doesn't fit <3 I am just having fun and it is meant as a gift for you <3 (also to motivate you to keep writing more about it!)
*------------------------*
Nightmare gets off his horse as he stares at the castle.
Well. His castle now.
He is still not quite used to that. Refering to it with his castle instead of his mother's.
Even after almost 12 months. He still doesn't expect to see himself in the mirror. or maybe the problem is that he expects his old self. The young teen.
The weakling. The failure.
No focus.
He isn't that anymore. He now has the magic. He is the new powerful leader of his land. And he will make this work. Even if he still has no idea what he is doing.
No. He needs to get back and make sure no one tried to rebel against him. That no one tried to hurt Ccino while he was gone.
Nightmare gets off the horse and someone rushes over to take the horse. Nightmare stares at this person and figures out quickly it is the stablehand who has been taking care of the horses.
Nightmare looks over his shoulder and motions the new people to follow him. The set of brothers, the dog monster. and Killer.
Nightmare walks into the castle as he speaks "Some of the other servants will take you to your chambers to rest and clean up. Tomorrow the three of you will join some of my other staff to see what is needed and where you fit. Killer. You will-"
"My liege."
Nightmare blinks and looks over.
Ccino has appeared out of one of the servant secret passages and walks straight towards him. Nightmare can see, and feel, when Ccino takes in the new people and just who they are.
Ccino's face turns a bit harder and Nightmare can feel the annoyance and frustration in the air "My liege!" Ccino smiles brightly as he speaks "Have you eben succesfull in finding a possible knight?"
Killer chuckles behind him and mutters "someone is in trouble~"
Nightmare knows Killer is being sarcastic. But if only Killer knew how right he was.
Nightmare however could never be worried or afraid off Ccino. For him? Maybe. But never because of him. He gives a tiny nod. The only amount of respect their places and ranks allow them when others are near "Ccino." He waves into the direction of the new arrivals "These people will join my workers." He looks at the four new arrivals "This. Is Ccino. He is head of the house." a title that will never pass away from him. Not as long as Nightmare is in charge.
Ccino nods "Pleasure." he looks back at Nightmare "My liege. If you have the time. There is a matter we need to discuss."
Oh yeah. Nightmare is very much in trouble.
Nightmare's voice is still calm as he speaks "Very well. I will meet you in my study after i made sure they go to their chambers."
Ccino feels unamused but he nods with a bow before he leaves the hall with a quick turn.
Nightmare turns back to his new... servants? He never quite liked that word but it works. He turns to his servants and feel his tentacles slowly rise from their position on the ground. They slowly start to idle again as he makes sure the new people learn where their rooms are and where to get food.
He brings Killer to a room more seperate from the others. Beyond the guard positions. Just because Nightmare wants to give him a chance and the fact he doesn't fear him is refreshing doesn't make Nightmare forget how dangerous Killer is.
Fuck this was a mistake.
What if Killer hurts people here?
What if he hurts Ccino?
Killer looks around his room before lounging on the bed "So what is the deal with the other skeleton?" he grins and wiggles his eye brows "Little secret going on there?"
Ngihtmare needs a moment as he wonders what Killer could mean. Then it sinks in and Nightmare feels his tentacles all spasm as he shudders "No." the answer is final and harsh. Killer actually looks surprised.
Nightmare holds his sight and speaks slowly "I will only repeat this once and remember this well. I don't like having to repeat myself." he holds Killer's gaze "Ccino is head of the house. He will remain head of the house. Nothing anyone can say or do will change this." he holds his gaze before straightening himself again as he moves towards the door "Tomorrow we will start training."
Kilelr sputters "We?!"
Nightmare stops and shoots him a look "Obviously. How am I to keep track of your skills and promise if i don't oversee the training myself?" and he leaves the room.
He hurries back through th castle towards his study. Sinking in and out of shadows as his mind, body and soul all know where he wishes to go.
He stops by his study and enters it.
Ccino is already in there. Studying the old masks in the special glass casing.
Nightmare closes the door and Ccino turns to him with a glare "What were you thinking?"
Nightmare gets taken back to a year or two prior. When he was still small. When he had cut himself to practise for the ritual. He hadn't been able to sleep and had been nervous about the apple ritual already. He had wanted to practise his part. to perform a blood oath to promise loyalty until death to his twin.
Ccino had caught him with a knife out.
Nightmare blinks back into the here and now as Ccino looks at him expecting with his arms crossed.
Nightmare blinks as he looks to the side for a moment. How is it that even wiht him being taller than Ccino he still feels small compared to him? "They were innocent."
Ccino looks unimpressed as he crosses his arms "Now with less lies."
Nightmare blinks and shoot his traitorous tendrils a look. No doubt they did something to give his little slight lie away. Ccino jsut raises a brow as he taps his foot.
Nightmare speaks again "Most of them were innocent. I didnt want them to get hang for something they did not do."
Ccino hums as he waits "And the murderer?"
Nightmare looks at Ccino "how did you know?"
Ccino sighs but has a small smile on his face. an old fond feeling as ccino looks at him and the tiny part of nightmare that had been stressed relaxes. Ccino just keeps looking slightly amused "There is a reason i told you to get out more. you only hear so many things from people in the castle nightmare. You need to go out to hear everything from everyone. I know who he is because i go to the market sometimes."
nightmare gives aslow nod as he looks away. So Ccino knows that nightmare brought a serial killer home. great.
Ccino sighs and sits on the couch for visitors and Nightmare joins him instead of sitting in his own chair.
Ccino looks at him "Just... tell me what happened. Why did you decide this?"
Ngihtmare looks at his hands. again slightly shocked to see the goop. It never stains anything yet it feels like a reminder. It is dirty. it isn't the holy light the powers promised. it is weird and looks diseased which is fitting for him. someone who betrayed everyone. who betrayed his twin. He may have gone it to protect dream. But even dream doesn't see this.
Where does that leave him?
Ccino's hand rubs his cheek and Nightmare shakes himself out of it. Ccino looks so worried as he rubs his skull "Hey... it is okay... i am not mad at you. I am worried about you. I am sorry if it seemed like i was mad."
Nightmare knows ccino isn't mad at him. Not like that at least. Nightmare can feel that. But he likes that ccino still tells him as much too.
Nightmare sighs as he leans into the gentle hold and touch. Ccino had always been one of the few to hold him. As his and Dream's babysitter it had been his job. But Ccino had always truly cared about them both. The moment that Nightmare could feel emotions he had been shocked by that.
That Ccino held no hatred for him. Not even a little bit. He enver blamed either Nightmare or Dream for his situation.
Nightmare speaks softly "The... kngihts you picked out. they were amazing. They showed much promise and would have made fine warriors."
Ccino hums as he keeps rubbing his skull "But?"
Nightmare sighs "They hated me. Even if with time they would eventually grow loyal and accept their place. They would forever hold resentment towards me for making them come."
Ccino hums and nods "I get it. It were only options Ngihtmare. there will be more people who fit the job."
Nightmare feels another part of him relax. knowing that Ccino still understands him "Killer wasn't afraid."
Ccino hums questioning.
Nightmare speaks slowly "He wasn't afraid. Not of me. Not of his situation. He stood up when near me. He didn't cower and he didn't hide." he sighs as he leans into the hug. He shouldn't need these anymore. He is an adult now and not that awkward young teen anymore. Nightmare shouldn't still count this much on the other "He saw me and didn't hate me. He knew who i was and didn't hate me. It was... new."
Ccino still feels unsure but he holds him still "And that gave you hope? That maybe if soemone didn't start with that hatred they could maybe become truly loyal?"
Ngihtmare shrugs. He isn't quite sure. he didn't think that far ahead. He just didn't want to lose another person who didn't hate him.
Ccino sighs as he keeps rubbing his skull and the back of his neck "I won't say i trust him. Because i don't. And I worry about you. I am scared he will end up hurting you."
Nightmare rolls his eyes as he answers "I have yet to even lose a fight and i had almost no training." all because of his tentacles and his newfoudn power.
Ccino just holds him tighter "There are more ways someone can hurt you Nightmare."
Nightmare feels the fear of before return. THe idea that somoene would kill Ccino. "If... if him being here makes you feel unsafe i will return him to the guards."
Ccino laughs and shakes his skull "Ngihtmare I am fine. I am not scared for me."
Nightmare keeps holding him as he feels himself start to shake. fears he had been trying to ignore and push away return to the front of his mind "Waht if they realise just how important you are? What if they try to hurt you to hurt me? What if they kill you to hurt me? Ccino maybe it is better if you hide." hide... hide away... out of sight out of mind.
Ccino just rubs his neck "It is okay Nightmare. It is okay. They don't know. and even if they have an idea your reputation adn the past of this country will just make them think I am someone who will be used as sacrifice last. That i will be punished last or least."
Nightmare shakes as he keeps holding the one person who remained "What if they hurt you because of me?"
Ccino is so calm and sure "then it would be on them. Not you. You don't want others to hurt me. It wouldn't be your fualt Nightmare and I will never see it as your fault. It is okay."
Ngihtmare still feels unsure. He made it obviously clear to Killer that Ccino is improtant. Killer is smart and Nightmare has no idea what he could be planning.
Another thought enters his mind. Somethign he had found early on in his ruling.
A very very damning piece of paper. a slave contract.
Nightmare speaks softly "I am sorry you are stuck here..."
Ccino shrugs as he keeps rubbing his back "Not your fault."
Nightmare shakes as he holds him "I.... I can undo it... I can give you back your freedom..."
Ccino had been taken from his home. Sold to the castle with a very clear purpose. First to be a babysitter. and later... well... Drema had been planning to be all powerful and go from young teen to adult in just one ritual. There is a reason Ccino's age had been only 6 years older than them.
Ccino had been suposed to be Dream's from the very start.
Ccino hums "A nice thought. Not that i thought about that contract in a long time. It hardly matters nowadays. Not like I can just leave."
Nightmare feels his grip tighten and his tendrils curl around them. He doesn't want to let go of the one person who cared. The one person he could count on to help him. To give a single shit about Nightmare. But... but how long will it take before Ccino starts hating him? If Nightmare keeps him here?
Nightmare holds him close "I... I can get you a horse... I can give you gold..." He will just use some of the treasury. Ccino deserves it. "I can send some guards with you on your way. You could go wherever you want. Back to your family."
Ccino locks both his arms around his skull and hums softly. an old lullaby and Nightmare stops. The amount of memories almost hurt. It was always Ccino who held him on bad nights. Or when he was sad. Or when everyone pushed him aside again.
Ccino speaks sfotly "Nightmare. When I say i can't leave i don't mean i physically can't leave. It means i don't want to. I decided a while ago i want to stay here Nightmare."
Nightmare shakes but refuses to let go "What... what about your family?" Ccino's fmaily have to love him. Ccino is so amazing. There is no way he isn't missed dearly after he was stolen from them.
Ccino sighs sadly "Nightmare... They have been killed a long time ago. The day i was taken the guards made sure i knew there was nothing to return to. even if i ran." Ngihtmare feels himself freeze. why... why had he thought?
Ccino rubs his skull "It hurt a lot but i accepted a long time ago Nightmare. I accepted that you two were my family now... and well... now it is just you. and it is okay. I am okay with that. I will always support you Nightmare." he grins "You may be older now but i like to think i am still the older brother."
Nightmare feels aprt of himself break as he just sinks fully into Ccino's hold "please don't also leave me." it is weak. it is pathetic. He should be stronger than this. He should have been prepared for this.
Ccino just covers his skull wiht his body and holds him "I am not going anywhere Nightmare. I will be by your side. I swear on my soul."
Nightmare relaxes and lets himself enjoy the comfort he should not need this badly. He enjoys it and can't help but let his eyes slide around the room. His sight finds the masks and remembers.
The masks are the highest honour. only shared with those most special.
He thinks something catlike will fit his older brother.
#utmv#NewAgeAU#I am not gonna lie.#I could not for even a second remember if we like... spoke about which mask Ccino would have#but also like.#All the guys get cats.#Ccino OWNS a cat cafe in his own story.#This dude? 100% got the first cat mask.#the OG#it would ahve bene a house cat.#but anyone who has ever had or known cat knows not to underestimate a cat#*remembers the video of cats scaring of BEARS because that is THEIR house*#Also i couldn't fit it in but Ccino probably alreayd has liek 20ish cats roaming the area.#Nightmare is going to change nim's old wing into a cat wing.#so ccino has more room for even more cats.#Their capital city is NEVER going to see another mouse or rat ever again#I decided to add this silly energy becuase i may or may not have writen another slight gut punch#I don't know why angst/fluff combi is so easy for me to just go towards. it just happens!#also i am so sorry. i feel like i am changing the more neutral relationship you have between ccino and nightmare towards. older adopted bro#this does imply that ccino is upper big bro which is real funny to me.#also i started thinking about why ccino would even BE there. and well... skeleton. aged to first take care of them#but then perfect age to assist and support them as adult?#yeah. They were totally planning on just gifting ccino to dream after the pwoer boost like “here you go! Yours!”#be it mate or husband or like harem member. they didn't care. ccino was just a servant meant ot serve the ruler no matter what.#okay i will stop now.#Hope you enjoy your little gift ;)
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