#no I will not tell you who it is but if you guess correctly you will get one million billion dollars because this is so vague
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serapbites · 2 days ago
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TOO MUCH.
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wc. 1k
content. angst, misscommunication, arguments, reader is insecure and mentally ill, vulnerability, fear of abandonment, relationship tension, trauma, anxiety, happy ending :) lowk based on my last relationship lol
n/a. haihiish first time writing angst, constructive criticism and advice is very much encouraged, also not sure if everything’s written correctly but yeah, enjoy!
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sometimes, you wondered if it was too much—your need for reassurance, the way you clung to every small gesture or word like it might be the last. you overanalyzed everything, replaying moments in your head, dissecting every interaction until doubt crept in like a tide you couldn’t stop. what if you were overwhelming? what if you were uncomfortable to be around? what if she was just too kind to say it?
these thoughts weren’t new. they came in waves, rising and falling like a cruel cycle. most times, you could shove them down, let them fade into the background. but this time? this time, they rooted themselves deep, spreading like a sickness until you could barely function.
you stopped communicating with vi. stopped kissing her, barely touching her. every vulnerable moment became something to avoid at all costs. you thought: i’m too much for her. she deserved more—someone stronger, someone prettier, someone less broken. not you.
and the silence between you grew, like a chasm too wide to cross.
a month passed like this, your heart breaking a little more each day, but vi didn’t say a word. not about your distance, not about your growing absence. and that silence—it fed your fears like gasoline to a fire. if she cared, wouldn’t she have asked? wouldn’t she have noticed? wouldn’t she have fought for you?
.
that day, you sat curled on the couch, scrolling aimlessly through tiktok. every swipe brought another impossibly perfect face, another reminder of how inadequate you were. if you looked like them, maybe she’d notice. maybe she’d care. maybe she’d love you the way you wanted her to.
a notification broke your thoughts.
“need to talk to you.”
—vi<3— sat above the message, your stomach twisted. this was it, wasn’t it? she’d had enough.
half an hour later, you heard the door. you stood quickly, wiping your clammy hands on your jeans, trying to steel yourself for what was coming.
“hey,” you greeted shakily, barely looking up. “how was work?”
“it was fine.” her tone was clipped, her eyes not meeting yours. the air felt heavy, suffocating. “can we… can we talk?”
there it was.
“y-yeah,” you stammered, already bracing yourself.
“what’s going on with us?” she asked, her voice low but firm.
“what do you mean?” you hedged, looking anywhere but at her.
“don’t do that.” she sighed, running a hand through her short pink hair. “you know exactly what i mean. you’ve been pulling away from me, shutting me out, and i don’t know why. just tell me. i can’t keep guessing.”
her words felt like a punch to the chest. you didn’t want this conversation—you didn’t want to hurt her more than you already had. but the dam broke.
“i’m not worth it, vi” you admitted, your voice cracking. “we both know it. i’m—there’s something wrong with me. i’m broken. and you…” you swallowed hard, tears burning at the edges of your eyes. “you deserve better. you deserve someone whole. someone who isn’t dragging you down.”
she stepped closer, her brows knitting together, her expression unreadable.
“do you even hear yourself?” she asked, her voice quiet but sharp. “is that really what you think?”
“i know it.” you sniffled, finally looking up at her through your tears. “i’m trying to do the right thing here, vi. i’m trying to give you an out.”
“i don’t want an out,” she snapped, and her voice cracked in a way that made your heart ache. “you think i don’t know you have your struggles? you think i don’t know you’re scared? i don’t care about any of that. i’m not here because it’s easy, or because you’re perfect. i’m here because i love you. because you’re you.”
her words hit you like a tidal wave. but then, something shifted in your chest—an ache, a flicker of anger you didn’t know was there.
“then why didn’t you say anything before?” you asked, your voice sharp. “why did you just… let it get this far?”
vi blinked, surprised by your tone. “what do you mean?”
“i mean, i’ve been distant for weeks, vi,” you said, voice rising. “i’ve been falling apart right in front of you, and you didn’t say a damn thing. why?”
her jaw tightened. “i was giving you space. i thought—”
“space?” you let out a bitter laugh, tears spilling down your cheeks. “you thought i needed space? how could you not see that i needed you?”
“i’m not a mind reader,” she snapped, her voice rising to match yours. “do you know how hard it’s been to watch you pull away? to wonder every day if i was losing you?”
“then why didn’t you ask?” you shot back.
“because i was scared, okay?” she yelled, her voice breaking. “i was scared that if i pushed too hard, you’d leave. that i’d lose you for good.”
her admission stunned you into silence. for a moment, all you could do was stare at her, both of you breathing hard, tears streaming down your faces.
“i don’t want to lose you” she repeated softly, her voice trembling.
your anger melted away, replaced by a deep, aching guilt. “vi… i don’t want to lose you either” you whispered, your voice cracking.
“then stop pushing me away,” she pleaded, stepping closer. her hands found your cheeks, her touch grounding. “stop trying to decide what i can handle. you’re not too much for me. i love you, and i’m here. but you have to let me in.”
“what if i ruin this?” you asked, your voice breaking. “what if i ruin you?”
“you won’t” she said simply, her voice resolute. “and even if you stumble, even if it gets messy—i’ll be here. every step of the way.”
her words broke something inside you, and you let out a sob, collapsing into her arms. “i’m sorry” you choked out. “i’m so sorry, vi.”
she held you tightly, her arms strong and steady. “i know” she murmured, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “i’m here. i’ve got you.”
and for the first time in weeks, you felt like you could breathe.
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mulders-too-large-shirt · 3 days ago
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my favorite mulder moments from s5
breaking into the labyrinth of the department of defense in episode 1 to find the cure for scully, finding only a vial of water, and the ensuing devastation that crosses his face
in the beginning of episode 2, scully is in the hospital, and he reveals that he faked his death to come visit her (“you move pretty good for a dead man”, skinner says, to which he replies “i’m only half dead”). he's going utterly ballistic, screaming “i’ll calm down when i have a reason to calm down!”, and then nearly collapses as he sees her sick in bed. only skinner's threat of arrest after they come to blows can make him see straight
he sees CSM in the hall of the hospital where scully is recovering, and spits at him “please tell me you’re here with severe chest pains” <-LMAOOOO
and when CSM tries to win him over to the dark side through scully’s cure and showing him his “sister”, he absolutely refuses, saying “you murdered my father. you killed scully’s sister, and if scully dies, i will kill you. i don’t care whose father you are, i will put you down” (LOUD CHEERING!!!!!!!)
enduring bill scully's horrible attacks on his character, trying to sympathize with his pain despite how awful he is being because he knows what it feels like to lose loved ones for the Truth. he tells this man that is being so awful to him that he lost his father and sister in his quest for answers, so he can relate to the pain he feels- only to be met with more scorn
he comes into scully’s hospital room again later on, where she is sound asleep, and he lays his head next to her and sobs
defending scully in her absence at his big important hearing; explaining how she was sent to spy on him, but “that agent scully did not follow these orders is a testament to her integrity as an investigator, a scientist, and a human being” <3
and then he SOMEHOW guesses correctly that the mole is section chief blevins, who had been on the payroll of the biotech company for years... i want to unpack if he figured it out subconsciously or was just equal parts lucky and confident, but i feel that we will never truly know
he tells skinner that scully’s cancer is in remission, saying it is the best news he has ever heard, then cries in the hallway of the hospital, holding the bloody photo of him and samantha as kids
he meets frohike for the very first time in 1989 in episode 3 and declines his offer of bootleg cable by saying “no thanks, handsome”, which prompts frohike to call him "a man of taste". thus began his long tradition of flirting with the boys
he was RACING back to the motel room at the end of episode 4, banging on the door, telling scully to get in the car NOW, and narrowly saving her from the florida mothman who was hiding under the bed!!!! i <3 protective mulder!!!
in episode 7, he flies down as soon as he can to vouch for scully's capability to adopt emily. scully introduces him to her as “a friend”, and he starts making funny faces to get her to laugh right away. he points out that the girl’s adoptive parents were both murdered, and when scully says that she can protect her, he asks “yeah, but who’s gonna protect you?”; he testifies on her behalf, even though he says he shouldn’t, because he knows it’ll put her in danger
later, he confronts the doctor who refuses to transfer over emily’s medical files. he pulls out his gun, points it at the doctor’s head, and asks “why don’t you tell me whose life is worth saving, yours or hers?” - he's so quick to adjust to scully's news of having a child and so quick to draw blood on her behalf
they’re bickering about the case in episode 8, so mulder, in a rare moment of clarity, steps back to ask what they both agree on and says they can work from there. i was shocked! in a good way! after 5 years, he finally learned to manage their opposing viewpoints in a way that can get things done! (i am sure this will never happen again)
his tree climbing detour in episode 9, plus the legendary line “hey scully, is this demonstration of boyish agility turning you on at all?” (and then bonus points for his sad descent as he is needed back on the ground right after he got up there)
his complete inability to function without scully while she is on vacation in episode 10- he actually TWIRLS the phone line while calling her!!!
and when he calls her for the 800th time, he greets her saying “morning, sunshine!” while loudly thumping his basketball up and down until she has to ask him wtf that noise is... so he lies, saying there is construction outside his window, and yells, telling the nonexistent construction worker to quiet down <- LMAOOO it killed me!!! (his basketball thumping has always been used to indicate his inability to relax... truly there is no peace for him without the bestie in town)
he’s SOOOO jealous when scully thinks the cowboy sheriff in episode 12 is cute (he recalls him having a thick southern drawl with huge teeth, so when they have to fly back down, she points out that they are totally normal-sized, and he still disputes this fact until the very end of the episode)
in episode 14, he sprints to find scully after she was present for the mass burning; he runs his fingers through her hair when she is in the hospital for vasogenic shock
post-krycek breaking into his house and beating him up, warning him that the end of the world is coming, scully finds him in his apartment sitting in the dark. “what are you doing sitting here in the dark?”, she asks. “thinking” “about what?” “oh, the usual- destiny, fate, how to throw a curveball… the inextricable relationships in our lives that are neither accidental nor somehow entirely in our control, either”
calling scully back from a payphone in the pouring rain in episode 17 to help get her some information on her personal case <3
(he also really nerds out in that episode about eye imagery in the bible, apocrypha, and references jesus christ superstar... a man of culture)
((and he was SO protective of scully- he stepped in when the priest was being all shady, tried to advise her not to let him get into her head, and we got to see some incredibly rare emotional communication when he said “i’ve never seen you more vulnerable or susceptible or more easily manipulated, and it scares me because i don’t know why”. he was grabbing her shoulders and pulling her in close, telling her she should step away when she mentions the visions of emily… god. he was SO worried!!))
when he’s being tortured in episode 18, he tells the man hurting him over and over again that he will kill him, which i thought was really fascinating
being willing to risk all of the x files in episode 20 because he fully believes that scully is correct about gibson being the key to explaining them, even though skinner warns against it... that is complete trust <3
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forgettable-au · 18 days ago
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FORGETTABLE-AU (page 82-85)
THAT LAZYBONES!!
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#So sorry it took me almost 2 weeks to post these#I was busy irl but ALSO I had too much fun doing extra art and forgot to work on these for like 3 days lmao#NOW THIS TIME I DO HAVE SOME THING TO SAY#YAY RIVERPERSON! SO MANY PEOPLE GUESSED CORRECTLY!#It wasn't that hard#We know Papyrus knows the river person#are they friends? idk BUT I PERSONALLY THINK THEY ARE#I just LOVEEE looking at the dialogue and making connections#I referenced one of the lines from the river person here...sometimes they'll ask you if you know any game you can play with a dog...#They said they were “asking for a friend...”#And I couldn't help but think about Papyrus' problem with the annoying dog LMAO#+ Papyrus seems very excited to know if the river person is there when you call him nearby that area#Okay so... now ...some comic thing that I made up but also didn't...#“FLOWEY DOESN'T KNOW WHO THE RIVER PERSON IS?”#okay so...#I feel like#It's not very common for them to be there...#When talking with Undyne around that area it's kind of *unclear* if she knows about the river person being there....#She tells you about the river connecting different areas and that you should “jump in”#She then clarifies that's the only thing they got for public transport#AND LIKE? It's unclear if she's telling you to jump in the boat (OR IF SHE KNOWS THERE'S SOMEONE WITH A BOAT) or is she's literally telling#you to jump in the river?????#Anyways...so...that's that#HEHE Flowey and Papyrus finally arrived at the house! WOHOO#Sans is too lazy to bring his old stuff to the surface! (or does he still think he'll end up back in the underground eventually?)#undertale#undertale comic#forgettable-au-comic#papyrus#flowey
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preggomancer · 4 months ago
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once again thinking about how sillygoofy it is that my brain must separate my kink and non kink interests so completely because my favorite character of all time is a classic complicated fucked up trans (TO ME) bisexual man who canonically has a child due to magical circumstances against his will and is repeatedly described as extremely attractive but if I think about him in any sexual way whatsoever makes me viscerally uncomfortable
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just-sp-in-inginthevoid · 4 months ago
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We always see the Yotsurugi siblings wear formal attires – Kongo's funerals shows that more than the other scenes since, well, it's a funeral
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Except Hibaru – for reasons we know – they're all well-dressed, Shikaba aside that is. Even Kuran and Taira, whom we see later mostly dress comfortably, have their tie up and their suit properly on.
Shikaba? Nope. He doesn't have a tie, his jacket is not on, he's not sitting right, he's probably wearing his sandals for all we know. They all made an effort but him.
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(+he's the only one sitting during these introductions. And the only one not having his back straight. He's just enjoying the breeze)
But the eldest they are, the more they dress properly at all time. The youngest seem less enclined to (that being said, Kou and Terasu do keep wearing buttoned-up shirts, Kou even keeps his tie on, even as a kid)(– and Kuran wears a proper suit both when meeting with his siblings and when attending Kongo's funerals!!)(– that being said, he's still not present on the 'diamond bond' panel)
But as I pointed out some time ago, Hibaru and Terasu make themselves presentable before going to see Kongo. Despite him being in critical condition and about to say his last words - they take the time to properly button up their shirt and jacket.
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There is a way to behave around Kongo. You have to be proper. Perhaps, Hibaru and Terasu didn't want to appear 'wrong' when visiting their father on his deathbed, but then again, if they're so worried and want to talk to him as quick as possible (when they're already late) why take the time to be proper before opening the door?
All the other siblings we see in the hospital are in the same position – that being said, for this theory of Shikaba not caring, or being allowed not to care, about his clothes and behavior, we would need to see how he was near Kongo when he was alive.
So far, the only other scene we see them with Kongo is during Terasu's welcome to the family. Once again, they're wearing suits, the atmosphere is cold if not impersonal. Terasu wearing a hoodie and sweatpants plus snickers isolates him even more (as if the white chairs among the black ones didn't). Interesting how he was allowed to wear that at his biological father's funeral but wore a formal suit to Kongo's (albeit that's probably because he was so young. But then again. Was it only that.)
Knowing Kou is here and is already wearing his clothes with '11' on it (one thick line=10, one thin line=1; both=11), Taira and Shikaba must have been already adopted despite us not seeing them (and by such, we can't tell if Taira is wearing formal clothes or not and if Shikaba still don't care)
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As for the family picture; only Hibaru and Shikaba stand out clothes-wise. Hibaru because his top is open, and Shikaba because he has an additional jacket. (There's also Reri bc she isn't wearing the gi properly but I'm not sure what that's about yet)
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The whole point of this post was to point out that Shikaba (beside Hibaru – perhaps(see hospital scene)) is the only one allowed to wear casual clothes and act less stiffly than his siblings around Kongo (or at his funerals). Or not caring to follow the rest acting so formal.
+
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Same when it's just them — they're all nicely dressed and then there's Shikaba not caring much (looking at the 'diamond bond' panel, Taira is probably wearing his shirt not buttoned all the way up here too, and his jacket must be open as well)
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unproduciblesmackdown · 2 months ago
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among the boundless billions zaniness like laugh track as it definitely has that moment of expressing "rolling my eyes as The Left makes a kerfuffle of Acting like they have a stance as a veneer over the true belief that [xyz] is cool & chill actually" like what, approximate 0.000% chance wendy isn't, as usual, given the Objective Stance of "yeah yeah ohh we are cancelling involved parties talking about how we Don't watch this But. we all love this damn epic movie & already have it memorized so shut the fuck up, kids today" like. don't wanna really delve into how much billions thinks taylor or anyone is "really" trans / nonbinary like not too much benefit of the doubt in this material including what does provide info abt that specifically
& the general like [head in hands. what do you think any of this could possibly be about (you're the one that made your show at all about Power)] of "yes, it's bad/wrong to be someone that someone has done something to / victim of something" like that to be anti misogyny All Women Must Be Epic Winners b/c there's something to be proved: that they don't Deserve to be victims (of misogyny), not taken as a Given. while when we see some epic winner men stepping on other men (who need not all be guaranteed Winners so as to say misogyny is wrong), that's often Good, well beyond any assumption that various forms of basic disrespect / violation / patterns of emergent/entrenched power difference as Bad (for being things done to people, not for there being people they're being done to), & generally billions has to take an extra step when ppl get shitted on & tell us the Specific Cases when it was undeserved actually & someone was being mean to a specific person who didn't deserve that. & the specific cases when hey guess it wasn't that bad(tm) or when hey It's Okay that you're someone something was done to, in this case. & tell us what we were supposed to know all along like when someone who something was being done to (wrong Of Them, whether b/c they inherently deserve it no matter what, &/or b/c they failed to be someone who could make it Impossible to do anything to them, which, how do you do that besides being The Authority / Superior yourself, exactly? nonrhetorically? what if the in group vs out group / fascism / authoritarianism protected Me?) was actually being treated Too Well b/c ah well the abuse meant you were getting any attention, maybe it meant you were claimed as any superior's property, maybe it meant you weren't Already disposed of, as all Losers were in the end, You're Welcome.
obviously referring to winston where it's spelled out all the abuse towards him was deserved, & More than he deserved in the case of rian having more access & taking advantage of that, all for billions' enjoying its own sendoff there of, again, maximizing violation & violence short of [real violence is physical & leaves bruises / draws blood / Literally kills] which would be distasteful in general But doesn't it make wags look like the winner & winston the loser is that the former's completely unrelated completely impersonal ego blow gets way amplified taken out on winston, the most vulnerable recurring character when spyros as [first & ultimate Everyone Hates Him role] is more entrenched in there & billions still magnanimously pities tuk, as it does winston too, just not quite as much. again that like completely surface level realized power fantasy of forcing the mirror up to the Inferior so they're like nooo my inferiorityyyy & in doing so like, the projection in that lmao, we get it re: the valuing of & need(tm) for such Power Tripping & Reaffirming My Superiority & My Ego Restored; Everyone Claps like good god. & then for all ben & tuk are the slightly softer Two Too Nice Boys duo to the rian & winston quant duo, also like too nice i guess but not as much, ben is in charge of tuk but Any instance of rian being in charge of winston outstrips them in that "yay interpersonal abuse" dynamic, like then in the end billions may be like "yeah it's possible to be mean to them unlike how being mean to winston is actually Nice b/c he deserves everything he gets, we only vicariously enjoy it vs Feeling Bad for tuk & ben sometimes (still magnanimously & it's Not That Bad / just goofin)" like ben & tuk still Fail by not being people it's impossible to do anything to. & not Exceptions who anyone is really being Too Mean to. like if they were women, in which case, no problem surely with a "positive" kind of victim blaming where there is something Inherent that Will be victimized so hey how about to cancel that out there's this special Paternal Protection you Need always, Or Else? :) but instead they are men who are asian & is ben gay & w/tuk & winston nobody mentions glasses or fatness but billions doesn't really do much or very in depth textual mentioning of Anything, even w/nonzero mention that there may be gender & race in this world. a gay man, once. no disability. we just Know who are the inferiors who deserve it when they're treated inferiorly, or if they don't, they start deserving it when they fail to stop/avoid it, but if you start mentioning the factors behind who we all totally agree is inferior like whoa nobody was Saying any of that? being the real agent of oppression on the basis of the factors only You spelled out, much? nonbinary? i never say anything about the Gender Binary when i'm subscribing to it, sounds like You've created & enforced it. obfuscation & deflection onto [so Just Normal nobody has to label, explain, or argue it] couldn't serve a purpose & protect the existing power differences as they are. maybe You're the problem? perhaps you brought it upon yourself & now you're causing too much trouble standing up for yourself while everyone else's criticism is laser focused on you as the prior & continuing negative actions done to you are taken as a given / unquestioned / covertly protected to overtly encouraged?
anyway so wild if the Completely Normal(tm) Victim Blaming is uncritically recreated & oft embraced for "if you're watching this & don't wish you were axe / find him appealing" [billions as a sequence of vicarious power trips] purposes in this series....but a bit wild considering like this is your multiseason show that wasn't just purporting to be those power trips for [enough demographic & apparently specific personal tastes overlap w/creators] & was at all purporting to question the matters of power at play in the material, or yknow, at least to not be completely superficial material while said material is textually & thematically all about power difference being leveraged, how, the consequences, & so on. thus i will have to intermittently talk about it forever like this like lord unbelievable. & the funny little & sometimes less funny less little characters it has trapped in there so that those of us who were never meant to be in the audience can be cursed with this knowledge. like i have some feedback. "imagine not victim blaming" & "imagine adjusting your perspective can go beyond superficial layers added to politely defer to some other ppl while they're present but really like cmon do they deserve that. am i not just saying what we're allll thinking"
#another random night another Verbal Effusion of [forehead to hand]#winston billions#who needs actual questions about power or the consequences of getting to consider others Lessers & acting accordingly#when we can last minute be like uh wendy is god actually. take it away wendy (wait she just does whole other shit half the season)#okay Now take it away wendy i guess b/c the series is dead set on you being the Moral Center#if mostly b/c gosh everyone either loves owning you as pseudo wife or correctly recognizes & defers to your superiority#the scene i couldn't bear to sit through at the start of s7 way too long sequence of wendy Going To Work to the ''cuz im awesome'' song#i was like. lol. i was like okay that is wendy's mood / perspective then. Wrong. it was billions conveying Fact to the audience. rip#abt as great setup for ''the only other shoe that finally dropped was that of Yeah It's This Completely Surface Level'' as possible (:#prince has exactly the same attitudes & actions as wendy does? uh well you see. it's just bad when he does it#if only more wendys were in charge. if only we go ''well even if it's bad if wendy does it? or axe or whoever? Could Be Worse''#nothing to analyze in the [but at least it's not worse] dead end re: justification of Power Leveraging & minimization of its consequences#tl;dr just the victim blaming embraced everywhere & the idea that everything that Deviates from the Norm Too Ethically Mindedly#is just that veneer slapped on overtop of [haha but truly: the norm] like no but seriously we all know It's Not That Deep(tm)#even for the characters written to exercise this [my Extra Mile Ethics] trait regularly it's expressed as this Polite Addendum#to the [what's Really at play] normal. the And Enbies tacked on; that's that on that & it Is an extra veneer to the norm#prince asking if taylor's changing up their pronouns; no more Meant a red flag than him immediately shitting on winston i'm sure#yet yknow why tf suppose taylor more than anyone else would Change Pronouns. taylor who the series also only ever shows as being#misgendered As A Woman. whose drag / cisguise As A Woman is not treated in the same way a man's would be / is#whose emotive / expressive affect isn't either. billions like [the genders are m/f] to [perhaps also amab/afab] Tacked On#as something politely Extra you do to their face that doesn't actually change (threaten) your idea of what's just Normal & True#like it's normal & true that ugh god don't you hate the autistic people around you? don't you wish you could go sicko mode on them#so that they couldn't be around you anymore & they'd have brought it upon themself & really it was good of you b/c The Group Cohesion#thanks you & b/c you just gave them free ABA? yes yep Surely Unquestionably#problem isn't abuse & concomitant violation in & of itself. it's Bad to be someone that's done to. we will announce Exceptions#rest of you either you brought it upon yourself or you failed to Correct that you're not someone who inherently deserves it#that is: someone who just can & will Stop It if done to them. well so you see winston pushing back is ignored or treated to further#backlash & then he withdraws (expression of his experience / creation of a consequence which tells the other Stop Doing This)#&/or otherwise conveys displeasure / being hurt (same as before. ''uh well push back / express xyz'' ppl did & were steamrolled/ignored)
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memewife · 1 year ago
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a couple of spreads i did for a zine abt some of the reminders when i make art
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tei-to-tei · 1 year ago
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*crawls back onto social media looking like a disheveled goblin*
ok so my 24-hr social media avoidance kiiinda turned into a two week avoidance i'm very sorry, my personality is clinically ✨ disordered ✨
good news: i did manage to draw a little bit almost every day, so...
hoping to have a massive art post ready before midnight ;u;
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hectickazz · 10 months ago
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working at those roblox customer service job games is insane. because last night there was some guy who kept being a smartass and the way he was ordering made me want to pull my hair out and run into the woods. "You want a bacon burger without pork.. so.. a normal burger?" "no. bacon burger with no pork" "but bacon is pork." "N o."
(i just gave him a normal bacon burger, i really have no clue. you ask for a bacon burger, you're getting the freakinf bacon burger)
"Do you want your ice cream in a cup or a cone?" "yes."
this guy was at my register for a total of maybe 20 or 30 minutes i have no CLUE
he was right on the edge of what counted as trolling. like, teetering off a cliffside. I was very close to calling a moderator at some point.
These people put you through hell and back. they make you growl like a wild animal at the screen. they drain you of every ounce of whimsy and life you have. and then, out of nowhere, they tip you 500 freaking robux for what im assuming is the big finale. an unexpected plot twist. (and compensation,) and then they leave.
god
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yaekiss · 2 years ago
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NO WAY BLACK BUTLER IS COMING BACK W A SEASON 4?????????
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jackredfieldwasmyjacob · 11 months ago
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ALSO on the topic of ships in ot. now that we have the finalists for ot 2023, it's been confirmed that at least one ship always makes it to the final:
OT 2017: almaia (alfred & amaia)
OT 2018: albalia (alba & natalia)
OT 2020: flamanta (flavio & samantha), evugo (eva & hugo)
OT 2023: juantin (juanjo & martin)
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scientia-rex · 10 months ago
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When I was in ninth grade I wanted to challenge what I saw as a very stupid dress code policy (not being allowed to wear spikes regardless of the size or sharpness of the spikes). My dad said to me, “What is your objective?”
He said it over and over. I contemplated that. I wanted to change an unfair dress code. What did I stand to gain? What did I stand to lose? If what I really wanted was to change the dress code, what would be my most effective potential approach? (He also gave me Discourses on the Fall of Rome by Titus Livius, Machiavelli’s magnum opus. Of course he’d already given me The Prince, Five Rings, and The Art of War.)
I ultimately printed out that phrase, coated it in Mod Podge, and clipped it to my bathroom mirror so I would look at it and think about it every day.
What is your objective?
Forget about how you feel. Ask yourself, what do you want to see happen? And then ask, how can you make it happen? Who needs to agree with you? Who has the power to implement this change? What are the points where you have leverage over them? If you use that leverage now, will you impair your ability to use it in the future? Getting what you want is about effectiveness. It is not about being an alpha or a sigma or whatever other bullshit the men’s right whiners are on about now. You won’t find any MRA talking points in Musashi, because they are not relevant.
I had no clear leverage on the dress code issue. My parents were not on the PTA; neither were any of my friend’s parents who liked me. The teachers did not care about this. Ultimately I just wore what I wanted, my patent leather collar from Hot Topic with large but flattened spikes, and I had guessed correctly—the teachers also did not care enough to discipline me.
I often see people on tumblr, mostly the very young, flail around in discourse. They don’t have an objective. They don’t know what they want to achieve, and they have never thought about strategizing and interpersonal effectiveness. No one can get everything they want by being an asshole. You must be able to work with other people, and that includes smiling when you hate them.
Read Machiavelli. Start with The Prince, but then move on to Discourses. Read Musashi’s Five Rings. Read The Art of War. They’re classics for a reason. They can’t cover all situations, but they can do more for how you think about strategizing than anything you’re getting in middle school and high school curricula.
Don’t vote third party unless you can tell me not only what your objective is but also why this action stands a meaningful chance of accomplishing it. Otherwise, back up and approach your strategy from a new angle. I don’t care how angry you are with Biden right now. He knows about it, and he is both trying to do something and not doing enough. I care about what will happen to millions of people if we have another Trump presidency. Look up Ross Perot, and learn from our past. Find your objective. If it is to stop the genocide in Palestine now, call your elected representatives now. They don’t care about emails; they care about phone calls, because they live in the past. I know this because I shadowed a lobbyist, because knowing how power works is critical to using it.
How do you think I have gotten two clinics to start including gender care in their planning?
Start small. Chip away. Keep working. Find your leverage; figure out how and when to effectively use it. Choose your battles, so that you can concentrate on the battle at hand instead of wasting your resources in many directions. Learn from the accumulated wisdom of people who spent their lives learning by doing, by making mistakes, by watching the mistakes of their enemies.
Don’t be a dickhead. Be smarter than I was at 14. Ask yourself: what is your objective?
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oflgtfol · 7 months ago
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like i still dont know if i feel anything romantic for him but like i guess at this point it’s not really platonic either since like we’re kissing and holding hands but like. idk. i guess i just dont know what romantic feelings… feel like? in my mind it’s still just hanging out just like, different 😭😭😭 like i know everyone always says ur partner should be ur friend first but like. we’re literally just hanging out. like it doesn’t feel any deeper or anything like that, it just feels. different. bc we are doing different things with different expectations. so even though i mean like well i have a. God i cant even say the word rn. even though im dating someone now i still feel incredibly aromantic about it. and luckily he knows and he took it well and he knew it from the get go so it’s fine but i also can’t help but feel like ahhh i’m aromantic though
#like he was telling me about his past gfs just to like be transparent and the way he said something#made it sound like . like idk like he was worried i would get jealous#and jts like Brother i aint got a single jealous bone in my body. i literally do not fucking care in that regard#idk idk idk. i like that everythings been very open and light hearted and transparent so far#me laying out my complex weirdness re: my aromanticism and then also him just being like. Yeah so here’s past history just so you’re aware#and idk like im SHY bc ive never DONE ANY OF THIS BEFORE !!!#and for ME its so fucking embarrassing he literally does anything and i get all 😳😳😳#he kissed my knuckles and i was like. speechless#and he was like thats so mild you shouldnt be embarrassed over that#BUT LIKE. I AM !!!#but he keeps telling me how cute it is so like OKAY !!!!! OKAY I GUESS !!!!!#so like idk idk its just. i feel so cringe but hes so reassuring about it so its like okayyyyy. okayyy#i still have no fucking idea if im kissing correctly but he isnt complaining so like. OKAYYYYYYYYYYY#ANDJSDJSHFJSHDJDJD <- dog being sprayed with a water hose#brot posts#but its not just the cringe its also just like the. idk. dhskjd#like he asked to kiss me the first time and he endured my five minutes of freaked out spluttering and indecision#(and earlier that same day i was gossiping to my mike coworkwrs about this and they told me its not romantic to ask!!)#(like maybe so but bitch im AROMANTIC !!)#(just the juxtaposition of what my coworkwrs said ans then actually having him ask anyway it was like. oh!!!)#(and then another part of me is like ITS SUCH A LOW BAR WHY AM I IMPRESSED but also. hdkshdkajsjsnsjs)#and sometimes i can tell he wants to kiss me but like im not displaying it w my body language so he doesnt ever actually do it#literally such a low bar but yet. im still thankful and endeared by it#and i just. ARGH !!#i guess thats a good word to pin to my feelings - endeared#i dont know if this is me actually. feeling anything romantic but like. im certainly endeared. im certainly charmed#in what way? who knows. but well i fucking agreed to be his official gf now so fucking whatever. just going w the flow at this point
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thebibliosphere · 2 months ago
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I’ve had an increase in rainbow aura with my migraines lately (I used to get them once a year, if that. Now, I’ve had it twice in one month) so I’ve become somewhat paranoid whenever something flashes over my vision.
Sometimes, it's just light reflecting off my phone, but it still makes me freeze up in a fear response when it happens because it usually means I’ve got about 20 minutes before I’m in agony.
Apparently, this new paranoia extends into my dreams now, too, because I was running down a long corridor, aware that there was something behind me that I needed to escape, but all of a sudden, in my dream, rainbow zigzags consumed my vision, and I stopped, dead and went, “fuck, migraine.”
That's when I became aware of James Bond/Daniel Craig standing beside me, gun drawn.
“Oh, shit. Do you need to lie down?” he asked while I stared at him.
I said, “What about the thing chasing us?”
“Oh, don’t worry about that, darling. If you need to lie down you can lie down. I’ll just kill them.”
I blinked at him for a bit, still winded from running then said, “Sure,” starting to get to my knees, ready to lie down on the cold stone floor beneath us.
“Sure?”
“Yeah. Kill ‘em. I’m just gonna...” I gestured vaguely at the floor. “Be right here, I guess.”
“You can go upstairs, you know,” he said, loading a fresh clip into his gun. “This museum has a hotel on top of it.”
“Oh good,” I said, starting to suspect this was a dream and not Daniel Craig about to murder the people chasing me because I had a migraine. “I’ll do that then.”
So I got back up and started climbing the stairs that looked an awful lot like the stairs in the Kelvin Grove Art Gallery, only to abruptly walk into Deathstroke and Nightwing doing their best to kill each other in the corridor of what was clearly a hotel based on the room service tray Nightwing was using to deflect projectiles.
They froze. I looked at them. They looked at me. “I’ve got a migraine,” I said,
“Shit, sorry,” Nightwing said, putting down his tray as both men stepped back to let me walk down the decimated corridor. “We’ll be more quiet.”
“Room 13 is open,” Deathstroke helpfully informed me.
“Is there a body in it?” I asked, now leaning against the wall, less walking along, more sliding.
“Not anymore.”
“Do you need anything?” Nightwing asked, “pain killers? Ice pack?”
I waved them off and made my way into room 13 where David Jason dressed as Detective Jack Frost looked up at me from the book he was reading on the bed.
“This is a dream,” he informed me.
“No it isn’t,” I said, despite knowing it was as I hobbled over to the bed and flopped down beside him. “And this room was supposed to be empty.”
“Open, not empty,” corrected Jack Banon who had taken David Frost’s place, dressed like young Alfie from Pennyworth as he sat beside me on the bed, leaning back against the headboard. “There’s a very distinct difference between the two. Oh, don’t look at me like that. Who do you think moved the body?”
“I need to sleep,” I said, “if I can fall asleep, the migraine might go away.”
“That's all right,” he said. “You do that. I’ll make sure no one else comes in. Oh, just one thing before you do.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out something I couldn't quite see and held it out to me. “You’ll need this.”
“What is it?” I said, my brain doing the dream thing where it refuses to read books or interpret numbers correctly. “I can’t see, what is it?”
“Oft, sorry. Can’t tell you that. More than my job’s worth.”
“You’re job...”
“Yeah.” and thats when he leaned over, stuck me with a needle and said, “Night night.”
And I woke up to the sound of @mothman-etd getting into the shower and Holly Mop wiggling under thre covers with me.
First words out of my mouth were, “What the fuck?”
And then I immediately pulled up Tumblr to write this down before I forget it because what the fuck.
Didn't wake up with a migraine though so... *knock on wood*
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yukioos · 1 month ago
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BED CHEM
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SUMMARY: viktor x reader // you and mel walk down the hallways of piltover university when suddenly, you encounter two men trying to break into a professor’s laboratory.
AUTHORS NOTE: hiii!! so sorry i haven’t posted in a while. season 2 of arcane broke my heart, but it was so cool. anyway, im working on an ashley and ada writing atm, but pls be patient. this is 1.2k words and something i randomly thought of because of a pinterest comment under a photo of viktor
WARNINGS: trying to break into a room, reader is interpreted as feminine because of a long dress and heels, reader is a councilor, not proofread
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as a new member of the piltover council, you’ve been the busiest you’d been in your life. constant laws to vote on and tedious, frequent meetings could make you feel annoyed at times. however, you made a new friend, who you’ve become extremely close with in the past couple of years.
you and mel knew each other when you were younger, just never hung out as much as you do now. despite not having strong connections to one another at a young age, it opposes how you are now. she’s invited you to her nightly scouting at piltover university.
it isn’t an interesting activity to do, but you love hanging out with mel. during these times when you explore the large university for hours, you find much time to converse with the noblewoman. sometimes you and she hold your giggles after telling the other a joke, not wanting to alert a trespasser.
this night doesn’t seem to be unlike all the others. you walk down the decorated halls of piltover university with a flashlight in hand. your flowy black dress hangs low to your ankles, and your and mel’s heels clack against the tile floor.
you and mel whisper amongst one another, she asks, “have you had your eye on anyone lately?” smirking softly and side-eyeing you.
you gasp and your cheeks flush, “‘course not, mel! i just… have not found the right person yet, i guess.” your smile diminishes.
your heels continue to clack against the ground, and you feel a cold breeze on your bare arms and leg, exposed due to the slit dress. you shiver and rub your hand on your arm, keeping the flashlight in front of you.
there’s a moment of silence between you two when mel hesitatingly speaks up, “maybe jayce has a friend you will feel… attracted to.”
“eh, i’ll just not do much. maybe let the universe pull me to the right person instead, yeah? i would hate to waste my time on the wrong person—“
she places her arm in front of you, squinting and giving you a look. you tilt your head before you begin to hear voices, and you quietly turn your flashlight off. mel keeps hers on, and the two of you tip-toe closer to the noise. it seems to be close to heimerdinger’s office, if you remember the university layout correctly.
“so far, so good—“ a man with a thick accent whispers, as if trying to hide his actions.
mel turns the flashlight on, and you cross your arms. the two men shield their eyes, and you recognize one as jayce talis. you tilt your head at the sight of the other man with brown hair and a defined jawline, who is turning a key into the door labeled ‘pf. heimdinger.’
mel taunts, “hmm. willing to risk exile for your endeavor. that’s quite the conviction.”
“councilor!” jayce interrupts, “what a surprise to see you, huh?”
then, the mysterious man comes up with an excuse, “wait a minute, this isn’t my bedroom. how could i have…”
jayce stands up from his knees and pleads with you and mel, “please. we can prove that it works.”
mel comes up with a contradiction as fast as lightning, she hums, “hmm. you couldn’t do so earlier today, how is tonight any different?”
“we figured out how to stabilize it.” the pale man replies.
he eyes are sharp toward the noblewoman until his gaze travels to you. his eyes widen and his cheeks flush, he can feel himself becoming warmer and warmer. you can tell he’s observing you and your actions, as well as your attire.
god, you’re beautiful.
he doesn’t say many words over the next couple of seconds, but you smile at him, warming his heart quickly. he’s knocked out of his mind when mel speaks.
“you’re the professor’s assistant,” she refers to the man with the keys.
jayce disagrees, “no, he’s my new partner.”
you nervously chime in, sticking close to mel, “even if you manage to prove your theory, the other council members would destroy it.”
“heimerdinger will recognize the potential, miss l/n,” the handsome man says.
he knows your name!
mel scoffs, and she’s not having any of their crap, “he already does. it scares him. it scares them all.”
“what about you, miss l/n? you are on the council, correct?” jayce’s partner asks. his eyebrows furrow in curiosity, and your heart melts at his eyebrows twitching upwards.
you ponder for a few seconds, staring at him and slickly moving closer to the man. you respond, taking a few moments to think of how to form a sentence in front of such an attractive guy, “i think any worthwhile venture includes risk. and please, call me y/n.”
you hear whistling from the hallway, and you give mel a glance that makes her infer, ‘we need to make a decision quickly.’
“councilors, this technology, it’s real. and no matter what happens here, it’s going to change our world. we should be the ones to lead it. piltover, the land of progress, equality, innovation. i know it sounds impossible, but when have we ever let that stop us? please, just give us a chance.” jayce explains.
you glance at mel, and you assume she’s left the decision to you. you reply with a sigh, “one night, you two. i want to see in the morning how you have progressed your technology.”
“thank you, councilor l/n,” the one in the white tie thanks.
you quietly nod and smile, waving to them as mel gently pulls your arm and turns the flashlight off. she goes on to distract and talk to harold, the enforcer. as you step down the hall, you glance behind you to hardly see the nameless man staring at you back. he then gets pulled into the room by jayce, who seems urgent to work on the high-end technology.
as councilor medarda’s flashlight flicks off, and you and mel walk away, viktor’s still standing near the entrance of the laboratory. he sees a shine in your eyes even through the dark hallway, however, he doesn’t know if you can see him as well.
he doesn’t even notice jayce has unlocked the door until he gets pulled in by the taller man.
“you were ogling at councilor l/n.” jayce grins, teasing his partner.
“i was not. that would be unprofessional and inappropriate. plus, we are here to work on hextech,” he attempts to change the subject, “we should get working on it.”
“i’ll work with mel to set you two up.” jayce objects, rolling his eyes and chuckling at the slender figure.
viktor couldn’t pass up that opportunity.
“who’s the cute boy with the white jacket and the thick accent?” you ask mel, walking away from the enforcer.
she grins at you, showing her perfect teeth, “that was viktor. and from what i can tell, he’s interested in you.”
as you continue to walk down the hallway, leaving the university to travel toward your bedroom, you go to sleep with a happy feeling in your chest.
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brokenmenswhore · 3 months ago
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idk if this is crazy but poly!maruraders x reader where r is blindfolded and she has to guess which of her bfs is fucking her
😃😃🥲🥲😞😞
oh it’s crazy but OH did you come to the right place for that
guess | poly!marauders
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pairing: poly!marauders x fem!reader (james, remus, and sirius)
warnings: smut (MDNI 18+)
a/n: you wanna guess the color of my underwear you wanna know what i got goin on down there
────── ☾ ──────
“You just tell us if anything becomes too much, alright?” James said, tying the silk fabric behind your head tight enough that it fully enveloped your eyes in darkness.
“Okay,” you said.
Remus bent forward in front of you, and you could feel his presence, but you weren’t sure exactly where he was.
“Can you see me?” he asked.
You nodded your head no. “Can’t see a thing.”
“Perfect,” Remus smiled, and you could hear the satisfaction in his voice, even if you couldn’t see him, “now remember the rules. If you guess who’s fucking you correctly, you get to come. Now, Sirius,” Remus turned toward his friend, “start it.”
Sirius lowered the needle onto the outer edge of the record, allowing the music to fill your ears to further deafen your senses.
You made yourself comfortable on the bed, laying back against the pillows as you breathed heavy in anticipation.
One of your boyfriends began to softly run his hands up your legs, stopping when he got to the tops of your thighs. They all wore gloves to eliminate the possibility of you recognizing their touch, and the cloth felt soothing against your skin.
You felt the bed dip between your legs as he wrapped his arms around your thighs, holding them open as he placed kisses on top of your folds.
You shuddered, instinctively trying to grab at his hair, but your unoccupied boyfriends held an arm each to ensure you wouldn’t get lost in the pleasure and slip up. If you could feel their hair, you would be able to tell exactly who it was.
He parted your folds with his tongue, gently circling your clit as you shifted your hips to silently beg for more.
The boy between your legs moved an arm to hold down your stomach as he picked up the pace, flicking your bud and sucking at your clit quickly.
“Fuck,” you sighed, lips parting as you couldn’t help but moan.
Just as he began to get you worked up, he slowed down again, intentionally throwing you off with his pacing so as not to give away which boyfriend of yours he was. They all had their specific techniques, and he didn’t want to risk giving himself away.
You were unable to move your hips underneath is tight grip, so you just whined in anticipation. Each time he quickened his pace, you began to whimper and moan as you got closer and closer to your climax, and right when the coil in your lower stomach began to tighten, he slowed back down and left you wet and needy again.
You felt a tap on your shoulder, signaling you to take your guess if you wanted to come.
One of your boyfriends stayed between your legs, tasting you excruciatingly slowly. You tried to rack your brain for how you felt, and which one of them could make you feel like this.
You figured it wasn’t James- he could hold you down much harder, and his eating out technique was not something he could easily hide. With respect to your other boyfriends, if this was James, you’d have come already.
It was a genuine 50/50 guess between Remus and Sirius.
“I- fuck, Remus?” you guessed.
The boy between your legs disconnected his lips from you, and you felt him leave the bed, your body shivering from the sudden cold air on your core.
“Not me, baby,” Remus said from next to you, dropping your wrists, “better luck next time.”
You wiggled your hips and pouted, “come on, this is no fair.”
“What’s no fair is you don’t appreciate the head I give you,” James chuckled.
You furrowed your brows in confusion, but it wasn’t like they could see it much. “That was you?” you asked.
“Mhm. You taste sweet today, baby.”
“But- but you-“
“Couldn’t give you the same head I always do, now could I? This game would be no fun,” James whispered, leaning down next to your ear and placing a kiss on your cheek.
James stood up, and you heard faint, distant whispering, but you couldn’t make out what anyone was saying.
You obnoxiously cleared your throat to remind the three boys that you were ready and waiting and anxious to come.
“Alright, angel, you want more?” James teased, and you nodded your head furiously as you felt one of the boys spread your legs open and settle down on the bed between them.
They all fell silent again, intent on not giving away who was about to fuck you.
The boy between your legs leaned over you, and you felt the bed dip next to your head where he placed his arm for leverage. He lined the tip of his cock up with your entrance, pushing only a little in before pulling back out and watching in amusement as you moaned in anticipation.
“Please,” you nearly whispered.
He so desperately wanted to make you suffer, wanted to taunt you, wanted to make you ask for what you wanted- but he couldn’t speak or you would immediately know who it was.
Instead, he just pushed the tip in again, stilling for a brief moment before pulling back out.
You writhed beneath him, nearly crying from need as you clenched around air.
The boy took pity on you, slamming his entire length into you and immediately fucking in and out of you. He knew that if he stilled his entire length inside of you, you may be able to identify him.
He wanted to take it slow and torture you, but he had to move fast enough that it wasn’t obvious who he was. Your three boyfriends were all different, and your body adjusted and reacted differently to each of them.
Your back arched as he continued to fuck into you, moans freely slipping from your lips as your body squeezed his cock in appreciation for the stimulation.
You tried not to lose yourself in the pleasure, but you were desperate to come. You knew the trouble you would be in if you did so without guessing correctly who was fucking you, so you tried your best to focus on figuring it out.
Each thrust of his hips hit your cervix, and though he was rough, he wasn’t fucking you so ridiculously hard that he had to put in any extra effort to hit your sweet spot. He could without trying.
Your thoughts went cloudy as he pounded into you harder, losing his self control as he fucked into you faster and faster. He was close to losing this game for you.
He wrapped his arm around your back, his gloved hand gripping your hip as he snapped his hips into you, the new lifted position causing him to bump your clit with each thrust.
You threw your head back as he became selfish, nearly forgetting about maintaining anonymity.
You felt the tap on your shoulder, and you couldn’t bring yourself to think about it. You said what felt right.
“S- Sirius,” you moaned.
Sirius leaned down, allowing his hair to fall in front of his face as he whispered in your ear, “good girl.”
The praise sent you over the edge, as did the confirmation that you had guessed correctly. You came hard, squeezing Sirius’s cock as your thighs shook around him.
He continued to fuck you through your high, chasing his own as you cried out at the overstimulation.
He groaned on your ear, leaning over you as he held your hips against his. With a final few harsh snaps of his hips, he came inside of you, moaning so low that only you could hear. The noises were meant for you and only you.
Sirius caught his breathing before guiding his cock out of you and gently placing your hips back down onto the mattress.
Remus, from beside you, untied your blindfold and removed it from your face. You blinked as your eyes adjusted to the unfamiliarity of the light.
“You have fun?” James teased.
“Mhm,” you vocalized, stretching your body out before leaning onto your side, “it was hot, but Remmy didn’t get a turn.”
Remus giggled at your pouting, “you rest for a little, and then I’ll take my turn, hm?”
You smiled as he placed a kiss on your nose, whispering, “except you’ll know it’s me, everyone will when they hear you.”
You playfully gasped as he smiled at you, standing tall and holding his hand out to you. “Let’s get you cleaned up before that though, yeah?”
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