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#i still have no fucking idea if im kissing correctly but he isnt complaining so like. OKAYYYYYYYYYYY
oflgtfol · 8 days
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like i still dont know if i feel anything romantic for him but like i guess at this point it’s not really platonic either since like we’re kissing and holding hands but like. idk. i guess i just dont know what romantic feelings… feel like? in my mind it’s still just hanging out just like, different 😭😭😭 like i know everyone always says ur partner should be ur friend first but like. we’re literally just hanging out. like it doesn’t feel any deeper or anything like that, it just feels. different. bc we are doing different things with different expectations. so even though i mean like well i have a. God i cant even say the word rn. even though im dating someone now i still feel incredibly aromantic about it. and luckily he knows and he took it well and he knew it from the get go so it’s fine but i also can’t help but feel like ahhh i’m aromantic though
#like he was telling me about his past gfs just to like be transparent and the way he said something#made it sound like . like idk like he was worried i would get jealous#and jts like Brother i aint got a single jealous bone in my body. i literally do not fucking care in that regard#idk idk idk. i like that everythings been very open and light hearted and transparent so far#me laying out my complex weirdness re: my aromanticism and then also him just being like. Yeah so here’s past history just so you’re aware#and idk like im SHY bc ive never DONE ANY OF THIS BEFORE !!!#and for ME its so fucking embarrassing he literally does anything and i get all 😳😳😳#he kissed my knuckles and i was like. speechless#and he was like thats so mild you shouldnt be embarrassed over that#BUT LIKE. I AM !!!#but he keeps telling me how cute it is so like OKAY !!!!! OKAY I GUESS !!!!!#so like idk idk its just. i feel so cringe but hes so reassuring about it so its like okayyyyy. okayyy#i still have no fucking idea if im kissing correctly but he isnt complaining so like. OKAYYYYYYYYYYY#ANDJSDJSHFJSHDJDJD <- dog being sprayed with a water hose#brot posts#but its not just the cringe its also just like the. idk. dhskjd#like he asked to kiss me the first time and he endured my five minutes of freaked out spluttering and indecision#(and earlier that same day i was gossiping to my mike coworkwrs about this and they told me its not romantic to ask!!)#(like maybe so but bitch im AROMANTIC !!)#(just the juxtaposition of what my coworkwrs said ans then actually having him ask anyway it was like. oh!!!)#(and then another part of me is like ITS SUCH A LOW BAR WHY AM I IMPRESSED but also. hdkshdkajsjsnsjs)#and sometimes i can tell he wants to kiss me but like im not displaying it w my body language so he doesnt ever actually do it#literally such a low bar but yet. im still thankful and endeared by it#and i just. ARGH !!#i guess thats a good word to pin to my feelings - endeared#i dont know if this is me actually. feeling anything romantic but like. im certainly endeared. im certainly charmed#in what way? who knows. but well i fucking agreed to be his official gf now so fucking whatever. just going w the flow at this point
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