#my mom will get my life ins anyway

[rebirthofartemis]

Should I…get my motorcycle license?…

[sailorrhansol]

hi! long time reader, first time submit-er :) could i request a dilf!wonwoo fic where you’re trying to get your kids out the door to trick or treat with a friend or a family member because you and wonwoo have a halloween party and you get self conscious that you don’t look hot enough in your costume but wonwoo disagrees? very fluffy, maybe even smutty if that works for you hehe

❀ Pairing: Dad!Wonwoo x Mom!reader 

❀ Summary: For the first Halloween in years, you and Wonwoo are able to enjoy it together without the kids. When you feel a little nervous about your costume, Wonwoo is determined to show you that you’ve always been the sweetest thing. 

❀ Word Count: 2,278

❀ Genre: Slice of Life, Married Couple/Parents

❀ Type: Smut, Fluff

❀ Rating: 18+ Minors are strictly prohibited from engaging in and reading this content. It contains explicit content and any minors discovered reading or engaging with this work will be blocked immediately.

❀ Warnings: Light mentions of anxiety regarding letting kids go trick-or-treating without them, slight body insecurity and light mentions of a skirt not fitting comfortably, sexually explicit content including oral (f. receiving), vaginal fingering, spitting, hair pulling, stupid and corny during sex. 

❀ A/N: Hey so anyway I’m not even that big of a fan of dilf-teen or parent-fic but here we are and I am ACTUALLY VERY INTERESTED IN DAD WONWOO NOW. SO THIS IS NOW YOUR FAULT THAT I’M THINKING ABOUT IT. Also the visual of Jihoon with a kid on his shoulders sent me into an early grave. 

❀ A/N 2: PLEASE THE BANNER IS NERDY BUT THEY’RE DRESSED AS COWBOYS OK LMFAO

❀ Disclaimer: Disclaimer: All members of Seventeen are faces and name claims for stories. Any scenarios or representations of the people and places mentioned in works are not representative of real-life scenarios. Moreover, none of my works accurately reflect, represent or take a stance on the nuances of Korean culture, cities, people etc. Seventeen members are not Seventeen culturally, intellectually, physically, or representationally in my stories, and should be considered name and face stand-ins for made up characters.

Main Masterlist ❀ Tag List Request Form ❀ Ask ❀ Haliween

“Soonyoung, her crown!” You warn, watching as your friend smacks the plastic crown off Haen’s head. She doesn’t seem to notice, too busy digging her greedy little hands in the pocket of his tiger onesie where she knows she’ll find candy. “Are you sure you can do this?” 

Soonyoung scoffs. His outrage is lessened by the ridiculous tiger onesie he’s in, the suit zipped to the neck and the hood pulled up over his head. He’s got Iseul in his arms, cradling her in her dragon costume as she pulls on his hood while Haen reveals a Jolly Rancher. 

“Maybe we-”

Wonwoo’s hand on your lower back cuts you off as he steps through the door frame. He pitches his voice low and gentle as he crouches down, eye level with your eldest child. “Hey, no candy until after. We agreed, remember?” 

Pouting, she shoves the candy back inside Soonyoung’s pocket. Behind him, Jihoon and Jeonghan snort. “Yes, daddy. Sorry, I excited.” 

Mouth pressed firmly to hide your smile, you feel the overwhelming sense of love for her as she puts her hands behind her back, waiting patiently for Soonyoung to escort her down the steps and sidewalk to go trick-or-treating. 

“We’ll be fine,” Soonyoung assures, pouting as he takes Haen’s hand and spins around. Your other friends hold out the empty buckets made to be filled with candy. “We promised we had them, and we do!”

Wonwoo stands, hand sliding up your back as he does. “You remember where the key is?” 

“Yes, daddy,” Soonyoung calls over his shoulder. He passes Iseul to Jeonghan, who holds her far less precariously. “We’ll let you know when we’re back. Go out on the town or whatever it is parents with no kids do.” 

Children and parents line the streets. You watch your little group of friends with your two kids meander down the sidewalk, Jihoon immediately lifting Haeun to put her on his shoulders. Nerves eat away at you as they finally vanish from your line of vision, lost to the other swarms of trick-or-treaters and bobbing halloween lights hanging from trees. 

“Maybe we should-”

“Nope,” Wonwoo says gently, pulling you toward him. “They’ll do fine. Jihoon is with them, what could go wrong?”

Blowing out a sigh you nod, taking a moment to just drink him in. As much as he hates dressing up on Halloween, he’s done it again this year for you, dressed in the exact cowboy costume that you had put together for him. It’s less a costume than it is precariously picked clothes - the tan, suede button up and brown leather pants had already been in his closet, along with the belt and bolo tie. You’d just purchased the hat and the boots to complete the look.

And it is a look.

Wonwoo has always had the annoying ability to look good in whatever he wears. It doesn’t matter if he’s sitting on the couch in a shirt with juice stains from Iseul spilling her apple juice all over him or if he’s in a pressed suit at a company holiday party - he looks good in everything. 

Heading back inside, you catch yourself in the mirror near the entrance, tugging at your skirt a little. It’s a little higher and tighter than you remember, and the button digs into your stomach a bit more than you like. Chewing your lip, you quickly turn from the mirror, busying yourself in the kitchen looking for your car keys and purse.

Wonwoo follows you silently, leaning against the door frame as he watches you. His eyes are heavy on you, your stomach fluttering as you drop a credit card onto the floor. Cursing, you bend down to get it, feeling the skirt hug you tightly and restrict your movement for a second. 

“I’ve got it,” he says quietly, pushing off the wall.

“No, no,” you manage to peel it off the tile. “This damn skirt is so much tighter than it used to be. God.” Standing up again, you shove your card into the wallet, not meeting his eyes as he drifts toward you. “Maybe I should change.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Maybe it’s just… I don’t know.”

“I think it looks fucking fantastic.” You roll your eyes, looking at him with a deadpan stare. His mouth twitches a little as he drops his gaze to the jean skirt in question. “You look fucking hot.” 

“We’re married. You have to say that.”

“Weird. I don’t remember that being in our vows.” 

“It definitely was.” You fiddle with the zipper on your wallet, nibbling on your bottom lip. “I think it was right after in sickness. It said and always tell your wife she’s hot.” 

His laugh is throaty and he reaches for you. You let him, his hands soft as he pulls you toward him by the waist. He smells like spicy cologne and something that is distinctly Wonwoo. Instead of looking up to meet his gaze, you focus on the pocket of his shirt, lifting your hands to fidget with it and press it flat.

“Baby,” he murmurs. You still don’t look up at him, his voice sending a shiver down your spine. “I really like the skirt, but you can wear whatever you want.” 

“Yeah?” 

“Mhmm. It makes your legs look good. Not to mention…” One hand drifts from your hip to your ass, squeezing generously. Your breath catches and your eyes flick up to meet his. They’re dark, a playful edge to his gaze that you’re intimately familiar with. “You look good in everything to me.” 

“Hmm.”

“Hmm?” he imitates. Wonwoo’s fingers skim the edge of the skirt, brushing across your thighs. You shiver, clinging to him a little as your eyes flutter shut at the contact. You can feel your heart hammering in your chest as he says, “Want me to help you out of it?” 

The two of you have been together for nine years, married for six. You know every part of your best friend turned boyfriend turned husband. There is no corner of his heart he has left unturned to you, no thought that you cannot complete, no words he can speak that you don’t already know.

So when he asks if you want him to help you out of it you know what he’s asking you. He isn’t saying he’ll help you out and to pick out a new skirt. He isn’t asking you to change it. He doesn’t even want you to put the skirt back on, if his hungry gaze and the low pitch of his voice tells you anything. 

“I thought you wanted to go to the halloween party.”

His laugh comes out in a huff. “I’d like to get you out of that skirt more.” 

Wonwoo’s fingers curl around the edge of your skirt, a question. “Please.” 

Wonwoo has never denied you anything, and he doesn’t now. He spins you against the counter so that your hips are pressed to it, your back to his chest. He sinks his hands down your front, fingers deftly undoing the button. His hot breath is on your neck, his lips barely skimming your skin in an almost-kiss. 

Button popped, Wonwoo pulls the material open. Instead of rolling it down at the waist, his hand snakes into your skirt, pressing against your underwear as his mouth connects with your throat. You let out a breathy noise, melting in his arms as he presses his fingers to your clit over the silk of your underwear. 

“Oh,” you breath, going slack against him. He doesn’t mind, pinning you between him and the counter as he circles his fingers teasingly. He keeps his mouth busy, pressing wet kisses up your throat and toward your jaw. “Thought you wanted me out of it.” 

“I will,” he promises, nipping your jaw. You tilt your head to the side, giving him more access. The lower pit of your stomach burns with desire, sparking at his lazy touch. “Just wanted to touch first.”

“Slow ain’t your thing, cowboy?” 

“Nah, I’ve got a pretty thing that wants to take a ride.” 

Your laugh is cut off by a hiss, your head falling forward, as Wonwoo glides a finger down to press at your entrance. You feel your muscles clench, your stomach lurching as he teases you. A hand shoots to his wrist and you dig your fingers in, nails biting. 

“Be nice,” you warn sternly. 

“Mmm. You’re using your mommy voice.” 

“I wouldn’t have to if daddy was being nice.”

“Daddy says he’ll make up for it.” 

Daddy does. He always does. Wonwoo loves to tease you and make you beg for it, but he doesn’t now, fingers pulling your underwear to the side so he can stroke your pussy in full. He moans at the wetness he finds, hooking his chin over your shoulder to watch as he works his hand between your legs. 

Wonwoo’s fingers are deft and skillful, applying just the right pressure and stimulation to work you up. Your breath becomes stilted, feeling the ripples of pleasure as he gets you where he wants you. Pinned between him and the counter, you can’t move. Can’t squirm. Can’t buck your hands to meet his strokes when he sinks a finger into your cunt. 

“Fuck,” he rasps, pressing a messy kiss to your shoulder. “Like fucking silk.”

Heat creeps up your neck. You feel breathless under his attention, the heel of his palm pressing into your clit as Wonwoo leisurely fucks you with his finger, dragging it out only to slide up to your clit, circling gently. 

Your fingers dig into him as Wonwoo strings you along, enjoying the way your sounds turn airy and weak. He plays you perfectly, working you up until you feel your thighs twitching, eyes shut as you let him steer you toward your peak.

Wonwoo pulls his hand from your skirt, making you eyes fly open, mouth hanging open. Turning to yell at him over your shoulder, your words are lost as he drops to his knees, fingers yanking your skirt as he goes.

Cool air hits your legs as he taps your ankle, asking you to step out of the skirt. You do and he rewards you with a gentle kiss on the back of your thigh, his hands skimming up your legs. You feel the coolness wear his wet fingers leave a slick trail on your skin. 

Leaning forward, he plans another gentle kiss on the curve of your ass, making you laugh. He hums pleasantly, hands warm and explorative. He presses the small of your back gently, making you lean onto the counter, ass out. 

Delicately, he peels your underwear from your hips, tossing them somewhere else. His hands return to your legs, pressing gently to pry your thighs apart. He groans at your messy cunt, no doubt proud of his work. 

The marble countertop is freezing cold, ground you as you rest your cheek on it. You feel your chest heavy, holding your breath for a moment when Wonwoo leans forward and dips his tongue between your folds tentatively. 

“Soonyoung should take the kids more often,” Wonwoo notes, breath hitting you between the legs. You make a strangled sound, distracted by the way his fingers squeeze your thighs, digging into the meat of them. His tongue dips back in, dragging upward again. “Want to do this more.” 

“You - fuck - did this last night.” 

“Not with you bent over the counter and this pretty ass in my face.” His hand smacks your ass lightly, making you squeal. He laughs deep in his throat, a little bit of a groan as he mutters, “Exactly.” 

Wonwoo stops talking, mouth busy as he fastens his lips to your heat, sucking gently. He drives you insane, losing yourself in the way his tongue circles gently around your bundle of nerves. He alternates between tongue and lips, a shattering combination of heaven and hell as he works you toward an orgasm. 

His mouth isn’t the reason you fell in love with him, but as you start breaking apart, you think it might be a solid entry on the list of reasons. You reach back with one hand, knocking the hat off his head to tangle your fingers in his hair. He grunts, appreciative as he gives a particularly greedy suck, making your toes curl. 

“Fuck,” he mutters, breaking away for a second. His fingers peel you open and you moan when you feel him spit against your hole, clenching around nothing. “Who needs candy when I have the sweetest thing right here?”

“Wonwoo.” 

“You even melt in my mouth.”

“Wonwoo.”

He chuckles. “Yeah baby, I know.”

He always knows. He attaches his mouth back to you, slick and messy and loud as he works you to your orgasm. Your nails dig against his scalp - he doesn’t care. He lets you tug him further in, happy to press his face as close to your heat as possible. 

You press back into him, muscle clenching. You burst like a bubble, completely coming undone under his mouth as you come against him, face pressed to the counter. He pushes you through it, not letting you escape him when you try and wiggle away, tongue hot and hungry until you’re begging him to let up. 

Wonwoo pulls away, breathing heavily. His hands skate up and down your legs and suddenly you’re grateful your weight is all on the countertop, thighs totally useless. 

“God damn,” you pants, eyes shut.

“Yeah,” he agrees and stands. You feel him crowd you in, touch seeking your hips. “Catch your breath, partner. You still got a ride to go on.” 

-

TAG LIST:

@ddaddunugu @ourkivee @cookiearmy @thesunsfullmoon

@stray-bi-kids @ldysmfrst @thepoopdokyeomtouched @avochele

@eoieopda @onlywon4u @hopeless-foolery @iamawkwardandshy

@gyuguys @codeinebelle @ateez-atiny380

If you don't see your tag here, it wasn't working.

[roosterforme]

You Can Handle It | Rooster x Reader

Summary: When your husband dominates on the pitchers mound in his recreational league game, you're a little bit turned on. But when you get him alone in the dugout, you realize that having your big, sweaty pitcher all to yourself might just be your fantasy.

Warnings: Fluff, swearing, smut, role-play, sweaty sex and blowjob

Length: 2300 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female single!mom Reader

This is a Batting Practice one-shot but can be read alone! Check out my masterlist for more! Banner by @mak-32

You were on the edge of your seat on the bleachers at the ballpark near the naval base. Bradley was pitching for the Navy Waves, and they were about to win against the team of Marines that came in undefeated. Until now. 

The sun was setting, and the stadium lights were buzzing to life. It was hot out, but Everett was on your lap anyway, and you were cheering so loudly you thought you might lose your voice. You were both wearing your matching BRADSHAW shirts and hoping for a win. "Come on, Bradley! You can do it two more times!"

Everett cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted, "Let's go, Dad!"

And when you turned to look at Molly, she was bouncing Charlie on one knee and staring intently at the game and Bob in the outfield. "Holy hell, the Marines are undefeated," she said, gasping as Bradley threw another strike. 

"Not for long!" you and Everett said in unison. Bradley just needed to get this batter out and then one more. And then the Navy Waves would be the only team in the rec league with a perfect record. 

When the catcher threw the ball back to Bradley, he held it in his glove and removed his hat. He turned to look in your direction as he wiped his forehead with his forearm. You could tell he was exhausted. He looked like he only had a few pitches left in him after nine innings, but he still smiled at all four of you. 

"I know you can do it, Coach!" you shouted, and he nodded before turning back toward home plate. 

"He's gonna do it," Molly said softly. And then you watched your husband strike out the batter. 

You and Everett were on your feet and cheering as another Marine came up to bat. This could be the last one. Bradley just needed to control his pitches. He was so proud of you now that you could tell apart his slider, fastball and curveball, and you watched him wind up and throw his signature slider. You gasped as the bat made solid contact with the ball, sending it up high in the air. 

"Come on, Bob!" Molly shouted as the ball seemed to hang out in the air deep over the outfield before falling down into Bob's glove. And then the game was over. The Navy Waves had won. 

You, Molly and Everett all screamed while you covered Charlie's ears. They would get to go on to play the championship game in two weeks, and you would get to cheer them on in your BRADSHAW and FLOYD shirts. 

Everyone in the Waves uniforms crowded Bradley on the pitcher's mound, and the other team of disgruntled players all walked back to their dugout and started packing their equipment. "Can I go down yet?" Everett asked, looking up at you with pleading eyes. 

"Yeah. Go ahead." You watched your son take off down the steps and walk through the opening in the fence. And as soon as he started running across the infield, Bradley broke free from his teammates and went to pick him up in a big hug that had your heart melting. 

Molly nudged you in the side, and you smiled at her. "Why don't you let us take Ev home for the night. It's Saturday, and he can play with Charlie tomorrow morning."

"Really?" you asked, stroking Charlie's cheek with your thumb while he sucked on his pacifier. 

"Yeah, Ev loves playing with Charlie, and it will give me a little break, too. Besides, I can tell you want to do some nasty shit with my turd-in-law," she said with a grimace.

You bit your lip and said, "Thanks. Ev will love this idea. And so do I."

"Honestly," Molly huffed, "he makes it hard for me to be mean to him sometimes." She nodded toward Bradley where he had Everett sitting on his shoulders on the pitcher's mound. Your son seemed happier with each passing day that Bradley was in your lives. 

The players were starting to disperse now, and Bob was headed your way with his bag as you passed him on the stairs. "Nice catch," you said, giving him a kiss on the cheek. 

He blushed and thanked you, and you watched him wrap Molly and their son up in a hug before you headed down onto the field. Bradley's hat was on backwards now, and while he still looked worn out from the long game, he was smiling as you got closer. 

"Nice job, Coach," you said as you pressed your hand to his sweaty jersey, and he leaned in to kiss you while Everett ran around. With a soft grunt, you felt your husband's hands wrap around your waist. The overhead lights were bright, and his body was arm, and everything felt right. 

"Did it for you. And Ev," he whispered, his mustache brushing your skin. 

"We love you. You're the best," you replied, rubbing yourself against the front of him. When your hand skimmed his white baseball pants, you felt hard plastic.

Bradley chuckled and said, "That's just my athletic cup, Kitten. But if you want me hard for you later, I'm sure that can be arranged."

You glanced over your shoulder and saw most of the rest of the players and coaches had cleared out. "Hey, Ev," you called out to your son. "Do you want to have a sleepover with Aunt Molly and Uncle Bob?"

His eyes lit up. "Can I play with Charlie and help feed him breakfast in the morning?" he asked. 

When you nodded he ran over to hug you and Bradley before racing off to Molly who then shouted down, "Have fun. But don't tell me anything about it later."

"What does that mean?" Bradley asked, wrapping his arms around your waist. He smelled like fresh sweat and his deodorant. The strands of hair that peaked out from his cap were damp, and you absolutely did not want to wait until you got him home. 

You unbuttoned the top of his jersey and pressed your nose against his chest hair. "Do you know when the stadium lights turn off for the night?" you asked before pressing a kiss to his chest. 

"I think they're on a timer," he rasped as you unzipped his pants. And then the most wonderful thing happened. The bright lights started to dim as the bulbs shut off, and you grinned up at him. He still looked a little puzzled as you ran your fingers along the elastic of his jockstrap. "You remember your ballfield fantasy that you told me about?"

His eyes lit up as the lights got dimmer. "Are you serious right now?"

"Yes."

Bradley tipped his head back and groaned. "The sexy bat girl gives me head in the dugout?"

"Only if you want it."

You screeched as Bradley picked you up and hauled you off the field like it was on fire. "Oh, I fucking want it, Kitten," he growled, setting you down next to the bench where it was dark. The last few cars were pulling out of the lot, and you could see their headlights reflecting on the concrete wall at the back of the dugout. But it was quiet and covered and Bradley smelled so good as he caged you in against the wall, pressing his hands to the cool concrete on either side of your head.

"That was a really good game," you said softly, tugging him closer by the open fly of his snug pants. 

"Yeah? You liked that?" he grunted.

"Mmhmm," you moaned. "All the bat girls think you're the best and hottest player on the team. I wish I could wear your name on the back of my shirt." 

Bradley smirked as you braced your hands on his biceps and licked a long stripe up his neck and along his jaw. You could feel his stubble and taste the salt of his drying sweat, and you had to squeeze your thighs together against your arousal. 

"I have an idea," he whispered, pressing his lips to yours briefly. "How about you take that sweet tongue a little further south. You suck my cock just right, and I'll let you wear Bradshaw on your back as much as you want, Baby."

You were tight up against the wall, but you instantly dropped to your knees for him. It was really getting dark now, but you could still clearly see the dirt stains on his pants as you pulled them down a little further. You kissed along his thigh and licked at his coarse hairs peeking out from his jockstrap. He was sweaty. So sweaty. And he tasted delicious. He smelled even better. You moaned so loudly as your fingers wrapped around the elastic and pulled down until you could remove the athletic cup that was being held in place. 

He was already semi hard, and you looked up at him as the plastic cup clattered to the dugout floor next to you. "You're massive."

"You can handle it. I've been watching you handle bats all day. You know what you're doing." Bradley's voice was deep and dark, and you whimpered as you tugged his damp jockstrap further down his thighs. 

"I can handle it." Then you pressed your lips to his tip and coated them up with his sweat and precum. "God, you taste so good." You didn't even have to pretend. You felt slightly crazed as you kitten licked him before sucking on the tip. Salty and musky and sweet and sweaty. When you popped him out of your mouth, you wrapped your hands around his hips and pulled him closer. 

"Jesus," he groaned as you licked his balls clean of that salty taste you were craving now. You sucked on his balls and licked him everywhere. "Oh, you're something else."

"Bradley," you whined between licking long, steady stripes up to his bellybutton. "You taste amazing." Then you wrapped one hand around the base of his cock before you took his length deep, gagging as he hit the back of your throat.

"Holy hell!" he moaned, bucking gently and gripping the back of your neck with one hand. You could feel his hairs tickling your nose, and you inhaled as he withdrew. "Let me fuck your pretty face?"

You just nodded and moaned, and you tried to say yes as he filled you up with his cock over and over again. But tears started stinging your eyes, because you just wanted more. You licked him clean and sucked on him until he was cursing nonstop under his breath. With shallow thrusts, you felt him start pulsing against your tongue. When you gently squeezed his balls, you felt that he was tight and getting close. 

He jerked his hips back and you gasped, missing the heavy weight of his cock on your tongue. "Come here," he whispered, voice harsh as he hauled you to your feet and pressed you back against the wall. Then he devoured your mouth, his hands a little rough at the back of your neck and your waist as he started to yank down your leggings. "Let me cum in your pussy?"

"Yes," you gasped, and he spun you so you were facing the wall, bracing yourself with both hands. You could feel the cool, night air on your most intimate parts as he practically tore your leggings pulling them down. "Bradley!" you shrieked, your voice echoing in the covered dugout as he thrust into you with one hard stroke. 

"Well, would you look at that? Already wearing my name on your back, Baby."

"Bradley!"

He sucked on your neck and let his hand snake around to your clit as he fucked you. "You're just that good, huh? Wearing my name while I fuck you in the dugout. God damn it, Kitten."

You were a whining mess as he pinched and plucked your clit as his hips met your butt over and over again. And you knew he must be close, but you were so wet. He smelled and felt heavenly, and you could still taste him on your tongue as his breathing grew ragged. 

"Please," you begged, and he rubbed you until you felt yourself squeeze around his cock. He made a mess as he came, moaning your name into the cook of your neck as your orgasm left you shaking slightly. You could feel his cum dripping down your thighs as he withdrew. It felt good. And his fingers worked gently on your clit until you backed up against him.

Bradley just gently patted your pussy as he softly said, "The dugout, Baby? With a sexy bat girl? I'll never be the same, I swear it."

He helped you shimmy your leggings back into place, and when you turned to look at him, he was a disheveled mess in the semidarkness. His cock was hanging out from his jockstrap. His athletic cup was on the ground. His hat sat crooked on his head. And he still smelled amazing. "I don't think you're the only one with a baseball fantasy, Coach," you whispered, and he smirked.

"I'll indulge you whenever you want it. You know that. Now let's hit the showers at home and get you changed into your little cheerleader outfit."

"I thought you were tired!" you said as he tucked his length into his jockstrap and bent to retrieve the cup. 

"Not anymore," he rasped, wrapping his arm around your shoulders where you were proudly wearing his last name and yours. He tossed his bag of gear over his other shoulder, and you started heading for the parking lot. "Now give me all the details about your baseball fantasy."

-------------------------

Sweat and hot. Fuck. Send help. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@chassy21

@yaboid19

@solacestyles

@avoirlecoupdefoudre

@daisyhollyxox

@throwinsauce

@awesomebooklover17

@wintercap89

@whosyourgnomie4

@rosesinmars

@blog-name6996

@bcon24

@wishfulwithwine

@backinwonderl4nd

@tetragonia

@gingerbreadandpaper

@emptyloverofmine

@chaoticassidy

@missmirandafe

@changlingkhat

@sugarcoated-lame

@avada-kedavra-bitch-187

@katiebby04

@marantha

@averyhotchner

@abaker74

@heli991113

@k-k0129

@noz4a2

@tallyovie

@shanimallina87

@teddyluvs2sing

@little-wiseone

@ccbb2222

@lilyevanswhore

@o-the-o-grim-o-reaper-o

@xoxabs88xox

@thedroneranger

@bradshawsbitch

@cherrycola27

@fanboyswhore9

@xomrsalliej4787xo

@desert-fern

[aicosu]

Guys, I hate to do this.

Any of you who know me in any circle know that I'm a very professional, very private lady who hates any sort of disc horse breeds that might give me a headache. But this one is important, and my goal here is the integrity and reputation of artists.

For my credentials: I have been a part of five zines in the past. Two I moderated, and one I ran, created, laid out, printed, and shipped in its entirety.

So anyway:

HELLCHEER ZINE BULLSHIT

I joined Hellcheer and the Kindred Freaks Zine very late. Well, after sign ups, check-ins, etc. I saw it was happening in april-ish and shot a DM to the twitter to join. I did both a full art page and a cosplay page.

At the time, the server was quiet but kind. We got updates on the number of orders and books being made.

@Lawless is the runner of the Zine. They created and organized it. They are in charge of the main emails, the selling website, the orders, the shipping, and the funds. (To be clear, this level of sole responsibility is not ABNORMAL in a zine. And is not always an issue.)

@Valerie is the 'social media' mod. They are in charge of managing announcements and answering questions on Twitter and Tumblr. Please keep in mind: No one wants anything but a fast and easy recovery for both Lawless and their mother. Medical emergencies, heck—LIFE happens. It's always okay to put a hiatus on anything, even product with money, in order to take care of yourself and family. Every single contributor only wants them to be clear in what they need and how we can help.

So lets break down what's happening.

Back in May, Lawless went radio silent on the status of books and merch coming in. Another contributor and I, @Toguchin, start dming Lawless to make sure everything is on track. They come back after a week and apologize for being MIA, explaining that their mom got sick. We thank them for all their hard work and wish them and their mom well.

On July 15th, after contributors and customers inquire on delays to meeting the announced shipping deadline, Lawless makes a twitter post saying shipping has started and contributor copies will be happening. They proceeded to go MIA from the server discord and have been since.

The following week, contributors and customers discover that shipping HAS NOT started. Labels have been created and printed, but nothing appears to be in transit at all.

Toguchin and I started getting reached out to by customers worrying their packages are lost. We report this to the zine server to NO RESPONSE. Except @Ashlee, the discord mod who also has heard nothing.

July 20th to 22nd with customers complaining and theorizing a scam in mind; Toguchin and I propose that PDFs be given out to assure and apologize for delays.

We as a server discover a few things: 1. We cannot access the list of buyers at all in order to email apology zines because Lawless did not share the account information with anyone. 2. We cannot access the main email for the same reason. 3. Valerie, the social media mod, deleted discord and distanced themselves from the Hellcheer fandom and has not been checking the Twitter or tumblr, or discord notifications since May.

Ashlee and Ichikun contact Valerie to sign on.

I made a new email and said fuck it, we need to do something to assuage fears, let them send receipts to honor their zines. Valerie didn't know what to post or say or how to answer everyone, so I gave them a copy paste.

Still no words from Lawless but hoping for the best knowing the have a medical emergency, Ashlee and I begin answering the new email for PDFs, but cant help people change addresses or give them any update!!!

Throughout the weeks mods and contributors ping Lawless constantly asking if they need any help! Any help at all, answering emails, changing order addresses, heck a few of us ask if we can pick up the books and packages and ship stuff for them so they can hands off the project and take care of their mom. No response.

We send message after message saying if Lawless can share picture proof, that would be great cause scam theories and chargebacks are starting. BUT ALSO, we let Lawless know we and customers will ABSOLUTELY UNDERSTAND delays if they just communicate it. That if they post in server and on Twitter that shipping needs to wait a month or two, no one will mind. No responses.

July 31, Lawless makes a Twitter update with comments disabled that they are shipping ALL packages that monday with a picture of packages. They also call Valerie privately and tell the issue that USPS refuses to pick up shipments from Lawless has, and they can't leave their mothers side from the post office. They also claim they can only deliver ten packages at a time at the post when they go. *USPS has no such rules. Me and other mutuals who run shops have never had such a problem.

A week later, we realize that customers and our packages are still not in transit. Labels printed only. Most of us assume all packages are just label printed and sitting at Lawless' house.

We beg for updates from Valerie or Lawless. Valerie doubles down on Lawless old reasonings and also officially goes MIA until present day.

Throughout August, USA packages get delivered. A few more updates are made straight to Twitter and Tumblr with comments off. Radio silence in server.

As packages arrive, we all become aware from people's posts and pictures that random Stranger Things Art Stickers are included. No credit to any artist is given? No contributor is responsible for this art. These are suspected to be BOUGHT from Amazon. STOLEN arts amazon sellers resell in packs. NO contributor is okay with this!!! Valerie responds with no response at all.

As of now:

No response to missing digital copies. Ashlee and I cannot give out any without receipts because we have no access to buyers list. Nor can we answer missing packages inquiries cause we have no info. International packages unaccounted for. SCRUNCHIES FREE OR OTHERWISE UNACCOUNTED FOR. Zero word on contributor copies. Zero word on donation status. Zero word on generated profit or book and shipping cost. No way to verify funds at all. No word from Lawless to contributors since July 15. From Valerie since the 31st.

Some notes:

Turning off twitter comments was NEVER what any one of us wanted. A ZINE LAYOUT was never shared. So until people had them in hand or in PDF none of us realized that the credits DO NOT POINT TO ANY SOCIAL MEDIA. All of our usernames are handle-less? This was extremely disappointing. This one matters to me: Our FanEdit artist was not aware their work was not getting a full page. Again no pre-layout was shared. So their work is tiny and in the margins of the front and back. That's not okay. All of us wanted to help in any way we could. NONE of us doubt Lawless intentions or emergencies. But lying, misleading, non-communicating and turning off comments are all things we did not consent to. All of us only wanted a cordial, honest response. None of us actually cared about delays as much as we did communications. There has been many noticeable times Lawless has been online, posting privately or otherwise, even active on Discord and has not reached out.

Why make a post:

Customers should know contributors fought for them. That we did everything we could and our reputation as artists in the fandom shouldn't be tarnished cause two creators decided to disappear. Contributors should get their copies. Many of us BOUGHT bundles. I've been in five zines and every single one gave out free contributor copies WITH merch!!

I'm also attaching all server screenshots for integrity. I'm in half a mind to release the zine PDF publicly, for free, for everyone at this point. I personally think it's only fair since many are still missing just that. But I do not want to insult anyone who paid for just the PDF regardless of the potential contribution to charity. But it's really up to customers, not me.

[lumineary-arts]

Saw you ask about ppls AUs uh

Most of mine, admittingly, don't have designs yet. At least not drawn ones. Oops!!

But I can like?? Still ramble ig?

I also have a swap AU! I haven't posted a lot ab it, but it's called Solver Shift.

In it I put Sam in Cyns place. So the DDs have pink accents (wasn't comfortable using Doll and making them red, despite barely drawing DD armbands anyways - personally at least)

Some places I'm still unsure about, like idk whether Khan and Nori should be direct swaps with Ron & Tessa or should be put in Tessas parents position. If I go the latter idk who to put in Tessas place lol.

Ron and Tessa weren't actually ever romantically involved. They were just best friends, and were like "well we live together, we both kinda wanna know what having kids is like. So let's raise one together"; insert Nuke (N) being built. Tess survived a few years into his life, they built Cyn and then yada yada you know the story - dead mom

If it wasn't obvious by Ns name, the rail gun gets replaced by explosives. Thank Cyn for that, it was her idea. (They both take canonverse Uzi her engineering skills, but Cyn takes the more unhinged aspect of the personality.) - Nuke was like "we gotta do something about the DDs but idk what!" And Cyn, sparkly eyed and all, was like "Let's blow them up!"

I need to figure out some episode stand ins seeing as Cyn is younger but still sticks to N like glue. Beau takes Dolls place, they'd be Similar in age to Cyn (aka I gotta give them a body design F)

Oh also, as for befriending the DDs -- whilst Ep1 would run similar to canon; after that Thad/T would bond faster with the siblings than Uzi/Z bc they keep their canonverse personalities mostly!! So that's a reverse. Also T wouldnt want to kill the Prom unlike V, he just genuinely wants to make friends 😭

Don't ask me why Beau is at the prom, being younger and all. Might just make it an all years general prom rather than just the graduating class.

Next AU yay

Blood & Bats is a Vampire/Human AU! DDS and Solver Drones are vampires, you get the gyst!

N & Cyn are bio siblings, got separated bc of a divorce. Eventually both were separately taken away for shitty parenting, one of which caused Cyn to get vampirism one way or another. She also has DID/OSDD1 in this AU, the Solver conciousness isn't an evil entity here, just s Persecutor under the definition of "Misguided Protector who hurts as a form of protection" -- they're basically just a terrified vampire kid who thinks they're a danger and thinks isolation is the only way to keep their lived ones safe.

At some point the Elliots adopt N, later Cyn too. They also have previously adopted V and J. As time goes on, the alphabet trio one by one get turned by Cyn/Solver but they catch her after that so Tessa never is turned.

Uzi is basically a half vampire. Her mom was one, her dad wasn't. I don't remember the details atm, but I assume I've posted them somewhere in the tag on my account, but iirc Khan killed Nori in a moment of shock and survival instinct when finding out. Uzi doesn't know this. She finds out later after being turned herself (on accident!) - either through N or Cyn. Might do N to draw a parallel to the miscommunication between ep 2 and 3. Bc yeah Uzi would assume it's on purpose and he broke a promise.

Once they fix things, she finds out about her dad killing her mom and she runs away from home, terrified he might kill her too -- she crashes at the siblings place OR Thads place. I'm not sure yet. Both have pros and cons.

Khan cant easily access the manor, needs to be at an event for it. But the parents would want Uzi OUT asap. On Thads end; Teacher (Thad and Lizzy are either step or half siblings idk yet) and Ron (uncle, moved in after his sister died to help with the kids!) Would not let Khan take Uzi home sending as they see her terrified. They don't know what happened. But Khan has easier access bc he's friends with Teacher and obviously Lizzy is there which Uzi isn't thrilled about.

That's as far as I can remember the storyline -- there would still be parallels to some episodes! Ep 4 would still happen! Just some would survive! Rebecca would be found by one of the alphabet trio and turned to save her life. She's wheelchair bound after that. Sam survives but everyone thinks he got too high and doesn't believe him when he talks rambling about Uzis vampire form (Becca keeps it secret bc like if she says something it by extension endangers the other vampires in the school which now includes herself)

Intertwined/Inteetwinjng Codes (Me when I keep going back and forth between both titles) is a next gen AU thing. It started off as a joke,,, oh well

Kids.

These little shits are twins, they started this whole rabbithole. They would boot up sometime after Ep 4.

Later on their parents would want to program another kid & adopt one. Invert Annika and Zagi, except unexpected thing happened and they now have two babies to upload. Insert Raven.

Annika is currently undergoing redesign, ignore how basic she looks compared to her siblings lol.

As for the last 2 kids -- they didn't WANT any more, but when being sent to another colony they run into this toddler with a baby, who are being attacked by other DDs so they step in. Whilst they argue with N, Uzi gets the kids to safety. They were gonna keep the kids at their place for that night but Olicia did NOT want to sleep in the same place as a DD & a ton of half DDs -- so Thad gets called at 3am 😭 hes the cool uncle to their kids so yk

Next day it turns out adoption wing is full, so the siblings get passed around Thad, Uzis dad and Nuzi a ton (their own colony got killed so they cant go back there) until Ray gets attached to Nuzi, and you shouldn't separate a baby from its bonded adults. Seeing as he already lost the code related parents, they didn't want to risk further hurting his programming. So the siblings were basically accidentally adopted by Nuzi, despite Olivia not being happy about it at first. But she didn't want to separate from Ray.

That's mostly that. Theres not too much lore tbh. Just a silly half joke AU.

Also I have 6 siblings IRL so I tend to like give my ship kids many siblings 😭 so ignore that fact lol, just projecting

Then theres like 3 more Cyn centric AUs.

2 are pretty small.

DD!Cyn AU that has no name yet is just the AS uploaded a copy of Cyn/the Base Drones conciousness into a DD body and kept her with the trio. That'll lead to major Identity crisis once Cyn realizes technically she's a clone and her memories aren't *hers*. Aside from that: Cyn and J constantly have beef bc of J abusing N, Cyn tries to get her to stop but just faces verbal abuse herself in return :(

Shes also pretty distrusting of Uzi at first bc like!! Nobody except Cyn ever spent time with N!! That's a Drone getting close to her big brother which possibly could hurt him in the long run if she turns out to be like the other teammates!! (She eventually warms up to her)

Then there is Trapped/Hivemind AU. Literally just Cyn trapped in the hivemind, unable to reach her body for control. She can HEAR the other Solver Drones and the DDs, as they're all part of the hivemind. But she can't communicate with them. No matter how hard she tries.

Especially when she hears N she will call out to him but not get a response

So shes probably on the brink of losing it

Then there is "Dormant" Absolute Solver

Originally it was gonna be "The AS lost interest in Cyn as a host" and ig it still kind of is correct-? I need to go back and forth between certain aspects lol

But long story short, Cyn now got a separate body from the AS, doesn't know it killed Tessa & comes to C9 with J & "Tessa". The AS just brought her as a tool to manipulate N with, but she doesn't know that. Cyn joins the group from ep 6 onwards. Yay more PTSD for the child I guess :)

I havent written out ep 6 yet but I think she'd be with N & "Tessa" for that part.

Ep 7 she ends up on the side of the rocks with Uzi, and walks at a distance after being told to basically F off bc Uzi doesn't trust her now but Cyn is scared to be alone. Uzi notices Cyn isn't okay tho.

(Varian tangled reference yay)

Might I add that seeing Uzis wings and tail in ep 6 would have majorly triggered Cyns PTSD but shes unaware of why she feels so scared. So seeing Uzis tail the whole time definitely adds onto the stress =)

During the fight Uzi would reach out to Cyn through the hivemind, both girls calling out to N through Cyns body. The AS doesn't like that and forcefully shuts Cyn down. It has admin rights over her after all.

By the time Cyn wakes up, the AS is grabbing her to blackmail N after just having eaten Doll. Talking about how he wouldnt want to hurt his baby sister (hes aiming his laser cannon at the AS for context). Then it gets bored, drops Cyn and the regular program ensures. Except Cyn took Tessas gun and shoots herself free from the tentacles and runs to the pit after seeing Nuzi be pulled in. Whilst shes there trying to figure out how to get them back up (seeing as she cant use her Solver on them, or at least not Uzi. The show us so unclear if it works on DDs or not) the scene goes on.

I'm not sure yet who Cyn will stick with, probably N bc I've more ideas. BUT also I'm waiting for episode 8 to decide that for sure. Same with the ending. I got multiple bad ending ideas and also a good ending :) ep 8 will determine which one will be canon :)

Oh yeah Cyn lol -- both new and old ref bc of the oil canister I didn't draw in the new one yet. She still has it as you can see by the oil tubes!

Also the Good!Ending DAS!N would run a Daycare post canon. IC!N also runs one. I just like having N work with kids.

Most of these (I think all except DD & Trappsd Cyn) are tagged on my account probably with some more info

Idk if the tags will show up tho bc they don't always for me when searching for them :(

My pinned post has the tags listed I think

I think that was all of them hm (istg if I forgot one 💀)

OKAY THIS ONE'S SUPER IN DEPTH I'M HEAVILY INTRIGUED. MULTIPLE AU'S DUDE!! I LOVE IT, KEEP EM COMING. Loving the ideas behind the swap AU. Putting Sam in Cyn's place is unique, I hadn't heard anyone do that before!! Also the thing about using pink is fair, I did use red but I didn't keep that in mind! A vampire AU's extremely fitting for Murder Drones, being a substitute for the Solver/Disassembly model. Since ep. 4 is my favorite, I love the fact it'd still play out here. Also I must say I REALLY like the next gen AU designs??? I actually kinda wish we saw more next gen stuff, or maybe I'm just not looking in the right places. Either way I very specifically love Rexim and Raven's designs, I think the color choices are really speaking to me. ALSO ALL THE CYN FANS ARE GONNA BE EATING UP THE CYN-CENTRIC AU'S. But it seems like the poor girl could never catch a break. WONDERFUL WORK ALL AROUND!!

[0rah-s]

Sinbad (Magi) and his divorced wife (modern au please, or if you don't feel comfortable with that, you can do it in the regular world)

Reader divorced him because of how he viewed things and how close he would get with other women, she's kinda gay

And Sinbad is kind of sad because of the fact that the only woman he truly loved wants nothing to do with him.

Even add a gremlin, a kid to the mix if it entertains you!!

Pls 💛

You don't have to if you don't want too!!

Sinbad x ex-wife!reader

Cw: fem reader, written in second person, english isn't my first language, you have an adopted kid, disloyalty from him, idk.

A/n: thank you for requesting and im so sorry for taking so long to do your request, writer's block be hitting harder lately. Hope you enjoy it mwah!!

How many times had he entertained the young women who threw themselves at him in the middle of your dates, right in front of your eyes?

.

Never could you say anything about it as its not like he was really cheating on you, he was "just playing" as he loved to say. It drove you insane.

.

In addition to his borderline unfaithfulness, there was also his questionable morals and the things he did to get what he wanted. All of it always rubbed you the wrong way but you fought to love him anyway.

.

But as we all know, ine can only fight for so long.

.

All of it kept adding up and and you found yourself bothe sat at the kitchen table. You slide him a paper - a divorce settlement document.

.

He tried to give you excuses and promised he would change but you were set, there's no way you'd lock yourself in a toxic cycle of wrong-doing, excises, and forgivness forever.

.

After the divorce,

You went on with your life like nothing happend

Of course it still stung to part from the man you loved oh so much but you had to move on.

.

Weeks pass and he isn't the same anymore. He went out to different bars and surrounded himself with ladies, reminding himself that he didn't need you.

.

What a conman.

.

He desperately needed you. Being a man of his position there wasn't many he could trust, somehow he opened up to you and gave you his heart. He knew how precious your love was to him yet he ruined it - entirely by himself. He'll never experience somehing like this again.

.

Guilt hollowing him as he grieves the missing part of him and as he thinks of the sadness he caused you. He'd become a waste.

.

Fast forward, you grew as a person and became successful, no longer the women you used to be.

Things kept getting better and better for you as if taking the weed out of your life made place for a rich and flowery garden to bloom effervescently.

.

You could finally breath.

.

Long after, you adopted a gremlin a kid!

You gave them the ever best life they deserved and enjoy life as a successful mother and child. Life simply couldn't get better.

.

Then he saw you.

.

Then you saw him.

.

He couldn't belive it's, the then live of his life standing right in front of him after years of no contact.

.

"H-hi..." He uttered, trying his best to make himself sound more confident - it failed.

.

"Hello" you replied coldly.

.

A long awkward silence took over when you decide to walk away before he starts to question about your life or worst - enter it again.

.

"I should go" you sai as you walk past him but barely a couple step away and he grips your wrist.

.

Tho he was strong, his hold on you was gentle, almost pleading.

.

"Please wait? Can we talk?" He asks trying his best to think of ways to have you remain by him even for a little longer.

.

"What is there to talk about sinbad? We're over"

You say curtly, not wanting to go weak and give in to him in the way is face begged you to.

.

He notices the young child beside and questions flooded his mind. 'A child? Was it hers? Ours? Hasd she found someone new? How much of their lives have i missed?' Then guilt came back stronger than ever, not being made easy but the way the kid clutched on your trousers.

.

"Mom, who's that?" They ask innocently.

.

"An old friend, dear" you smile at your child lovingly.

.

An old friend, those words rung in his head like hell bells.

.

He let go of your wrist and she walked away.

.

You sufferd through him, why shouldn't he? Regardless of how he feels you have more to care about.

.

He'll find a way to heal, you wish him that much. But for now the only thoughts in your head is what you're going to do today to make this day unforgettable for your child and yourself.

[holidaywishes]

lilacs and ice cream

Requested: 👍

Summary/Request: Idk if your taking requests but, If you could (if your doing it) write something about Bo Bichette again please, preferably with a gn or fem reader. I’ve read everything that I can read about him that also applies with me.

Author's Note: Alright, @goodiesinthecloset21, I'm gonna do my best with this one. I want to add that I know absolutely nothing about baseball so any terminology is the work of a quick Google search or something I've heard in a movie. Anyway, I know that you sent your request like a million years ago so I hope after all this time, it gives you a bit of what you're looking for. I decided to do something softer this time, more fluff, since the last one was smut but let me know if that's not the way you wanted it to go and I can give it another shot. Thanks babe! Love ya, stay golden!

P.S. some of this is kinda giving “strained family relationship” which was unintentional, so I’m sorry about that. Hopefully, that doesn’t take away from the story.

masterlist

the other masterlist

xx

Summer in Toronto was beautiful. You loved the way the flowers bloomed, the bright purples popping against the bright green grass; even on the smoggiest days. There was only ever one thing missing - someone to share it with. That is, until Bo came into your life. You had gone to the baseball game with your family begrudgingly, but the seats were good and you knew it was something that your dad had wanted for a long time

“I just want to be in that stadium,” he’d say at least twice a month for most of your life, “just once. To see a game and watch the Jays win”

It was nice to see him, and the rest of your family, so happy. You watched the game, intermittently laughing at your dad as he tried to start a wave that barely made it past your section, or when he spilled his popcorn after jumping up in excitement. You really started to get into it around the 3rd inning, the crowd was getting loud and rowdy and it started to rub off on you. By the time the game ended, you were beaming with excitement, so much so that you weren’t watching where you were going and you somehow walked right into a crowd of people.

“Oh my goodness I’m so sorry!” you laughed, “I guess that’ll teach me to watch where I’m going next time”

“That’s alright,” one voice said, “are you okay?”

“I’m fine. A bit embarrassed maybe,” you added before finally looking up to see who you’d bumped into. Speechless when you saw Bo Bichette smiling back at you, “but you know…” you continued, trying not to blush as you stared, “fine”

“Glad to hear it,” he said cheerfully before his teammates called him to the bus that was waiting for them, “don’t go running into anybody else now.” You watched for a second while he hopped on the bus, feeling a small tug on your arm from your mom pulling you towards your family

“(Y/N), come on, what are you doing?” she laughed

“Yeah, yeah,” you answered distractedly, “I’m coming.” Your mind wandered to that encounter all through your family meal and you weren’t sure you could ever forget it - or that you wanted to.

xx

It had been nearly a week since you bumped into Bo Bichette at the Jays game. Honestly, it kept you going during your boring serving shifts at the pub you worked at.

“I mean it was a fun story,” your co-worker, Brit, smirked as she leaned against the wall where you were cleaning a table, “but don’t you think you should be over it by now? I mean.. it was a chance encounter,” she teased, “we don’t live in a rom-com”

“I’m sorry,” you laughed in return, “but it’s one of the more exciting things that have happened in my life. And.. yeah, maybe I’ve been single for a little longer than I would like.” Brit gave you an almost pitiful look before the door was burst open by a loud crowd of men, laughing amongst themselves before stopping at the host stand to ask for a table; you could only watch for a moment as they were directed to your section before you were pulled away to run food. When you finally got to the table of boastful boys, you noticed who exactly they were

“Well, hello again,” Bo smiled as he greeted you, “I was hoping I'd see you again. Maybe get a name this time?”

“H-h-hi,” you stammered, as you looked at him until you realized you should probably be professional, “hi, I'm (Y/N),” you course-corrected, “I'll be your server today. How is everyone doing today?” It was an awkward segue but you didn't know what to do

“Hi, (Y/N), I'm Bo. Nice to meet you,” he said, introducing himself in return and it calmed you down enough for you to... not look like a complete moron when doing your job, “officially.” You felt a blush creep across your face as you continued to take everyone’s orders. When you finally left the table, you exhaled sharply while your co-workers giggled

“I can’t believe this,” you whispered to yourself, “this is insane”

“It’s gonna be fine,” your friend said with a smile, “think of it this way: you’re finally continuing your rom-com”

“Come on, Brit,” you replied, hanging your head, “this isn’t funny. I’m too flustered to give them… to be a good server”

“You’ll be great!” she continued, “just be your bubbly self. They’re just people, don’t think of them otherwise”

“Yeah, just people,” you repeated, “incredibly well-known, well-recognizable, wealthy people”

“You know you also have other tables…” one of your other co-workers, who had been listening to the entire conversation, interjected, forcing you to snap out of your pity party

“SHIT!” you said quietly, rushing out to check on your tables, refilling water glasses and clearing plates where needed, all the while keeping an eye on the players of the Toronto Blue Jays. At some point in the night, the host came to grab you

“(Y/N), they’re asking for you,” the host said, “I don’t think they’re upset but they don’t want to talk to anyone else. Not even the managers”

“How long ago did they ask?” you asked

“Like less than a minute” she answered

“And they’re not upset?”

“No.. I mean I don’t think so but maybe they’re pretending? Being ‘polite mad’?” You chuckled a bit before thanking her and heading back to them, greeting them happily, making sure everything was alright

“We just wanted to ask you a question” Bo smiled

“Bo wanted to ask you a question,” one of the others clarified, and your interest was suddenly peaked

“Ah, okay,” you returned, placing your hand on the back of Bo’s chair, “what’s the question?”

“What are you doing after your shift?” he asked

“It’ll be late,” you admitted with a chuckle, “so I’ll probably be going to bed”

“What time are you off?”

“I’m on a split tonight, so I’m here until at least 10pm” you replied

“Do you work tomorrow?” Bo continued, earning a shy smile from you

“Tomorrow’s my day off. I hardly ever work Sundays”

“Are you free around.. noon?”

“Sure,” you said, “for what?”

“There’s this path I love hiking, how do you feel about that?” you said that would be great, both of you smiling at each other, almost completely ignoring everyone at the table. It took you until you got into the kitchen that you realized you had just been asked out on a date - ‘I guess it has been a while’ you thought - and now you didn’t know how to act. Bo was the one who confirmed the date, leaving you with a blush that covered your whole face; you were sure it looked like you were having an allergic reaction but you hoped he wasn't embarrassed of you...

“I'll see you tomorrow” you managed to get out after what felt like an eternity

“Tomorrow,” he said with a smile, walking backward as he left the pub, keeping his eyes locked on you until one of his teammates turned him around so he didn't hurt himself by running into the door.

xx

You woke up the next morning and practically hopped out of bed, immediately texting Brit

“Did I dream Bo Bichette asking me out on a date?” you asked

“No,” she replied plainly, after about 10 minutes

“I'm going hiking with a professional athlete today?”

“Yes”

“WHAT DO I DO?!”

“First of all,” she started a string of texts, “it's 8 in the morning, calm down.” You chuckled at her text, knowing that she had probably bitterly rolled out of bed after hearing the chime of her phone, “second, what do you mean what do you do? You go on a date with Professional Baseball Player, Bo Bichette”

“Okay.. sure," you typed, “but what do I wear?”

“You're going on a hike. Don't wear jeans”

“Thank you for that”

“Always here to help”

“I should start getting ready...”

“Again, it's 8AM” she repeated

“And the date is at noon...”

“Yeah”

“You don't need four hours to get ready”

“I need to shower”

“20 minutes”

“I have to find an outfit”

“5 minutes, 10 max”

“I have to do my hair and make myself look presentable”

“We'll say 30 minutes to be safe”

“I have to eat something...” You were grasping now but what could you do, you were nervous

“Maybe he's planning on taking you somewhere after the hike?” she countered, "I don't think eating before a hike is recommended”

“BRIT!” you text-shouted, "I'm freaking out. I don't want to be freaking out but I am. I don't want to make a fool of myself. Or him...”

“Okay, okay, okay,” you could practically hear her sigh through the screen, "you're not going to make a fool of yourself or him. No one's gonna be made a fool today. But you don't need to worry so much. Wear a pair of shorts, the ones you really like, bring a bandana or something - to get your hair off your neck a bit but also to get rid of any sweat you don't want him to see - and make sure you wear sneakers. Don't wear boots or flip-flops. And sunscreen. Always wear sunscreen!” You thanked her quickly, jokingly saying that you were glad she was finally getting on board, and placed your phone back on its charger before hopping in the shower.

“Maybe Brit was wrong. Maybe this really was a mistake…” you grumbled to yourself as you fixed your outfit in the mirror, nearly jumping out of your skin when the doorbell rang. You tried to be as calm as you could, letting out a deep exhale before answering the door

“Hey!” Bo said with a wide smile

“Hi,” you said simply, any doubt you had was now replaced with butterflies in your stomach - being nervous was so basic but you couldn’t help it.

“I.. you ready?” He stammered. It made you feel better that he seemed a little out of his element as well

“Let me just grab a water bottle” you smiled, leaving the door open as you ran to the kitchen; a way of saying ‘you can come in, judge my apartment a little if you want,’ but you were maybe just a little too quick.

“Let’s get going then,” he remarked happily and the two of you were on your way. You weren’t sure what to expect with this hike but Bo using the word path led you to believe it wouldn’t be that bad - which would be ideal since the last time you properly went hiking would be at least 5 years ago. However, it turns out, you forgot to take into account that Bo Bichette was, in fact, Bo Bichette: Professional MLBer. In the middle of the hike, you leaned against a tree, claiming you needed the shade

“I forgot to put on sunscreen and I don't want to burn,” you falsely claimed, catching your breath as Bo leaned against the tree with you

“Sure,” he smirked, bringing out his water bottle to take a sip, “I mean I don't burn as easily but we can stay in the shade.” Once you had finally evened out your breathing, you took a sip of water and looked out at the path that you were about to continue walking

“It's beautiful out here,” you smiled, leading both of you back onto the path at a slower pace now, “I can tell why you like it so much”

“I almost brought you flowers, lilacs,” he gestured to the flowers on the path, “but I knew the path and I knew there would be lilacs here, so I decided against it”

“Aww,” you said, pouting slightly to hopefully show how cute you thought it was, “that's really sweet. I would've appreciated it either way but I'm glad I got to see this first”

“I chose right then?” he asked eagerly

“Yes,"”you smiled, “you chose right.” Bo kept your pace for the rest of the walk but you could tell it was not what he was used to and you felt a little silly not telling him you hadn't been hiking in so long. “I'm sorry that this wasn't a very.. exciting hike,” you laughed uncomfortably, “I haven't been on a trail of any kind in about 5 years. I used to do a lot more physical activity and then I guess I just kinda... stopped”

“That's okay,” he smiled in return as the trail came to an end, “it was nice to see it at this pace. Yes, I do typically go a bit faster,” he laughed to himself, “but I don't always take in the beauty of the actual walk. So, I guess I should thank you”

“You're very welcome,” you returned jokingly and he bowed to add to the humour. The two of you finally got to the car and you hesitated as to what was going to happen next

“Everything okay?” he asked, noticing your reluctance to open the door

“I just... had a really good time,” you admitted, “I'm wondering, I guess, what's next?”

“What do you mean?”

“Are we going somewhere else or should we end it here?” you said, “I mean, sorry,” you continued awkwardly, “I don't want to be presumptuous. I'm just flushed”

“What would you like to do?” he smirked

“Whatever you had planned” you admitted

“Then, I think we should go get some ice cream,” he offered, “I know a great place nearby.” You happily agreed before hopping into the passenger seat of the car. You felt butterflies the entire car ride to the ice cream shop and tried not to stare at him too often but would occasionally catch him looking back at you.

“Is Rocky Road your usual choice?” you asked, as you scooped a bit of your favourite into a spoon and bringing it to your mouth

“No,” he admitted, “I’ve never actually had it. I just wanted to try it”

“And…?” you giggled, “what do you think?”

“It’s okay,” he laughed, “I’ve had better but I’ve also had worse.” You smiled at his words and continued eating your own ice cream, taking in the pastel colours of the parlour at the same time, when you heard Bo giggle slightly; your attention immediately drawn back to him

“What?” you blushed

“You just have…” he began, gesturing to his mouth and it took you a minute to understand that you must have ice cream around your mouth.

“Oh,” you said in surprise, tinged with embarrassment, but his finger soon grazed your lip, wiping away the small mess there. “Thank you,” you whispered in this unbelievable rom-com moment, his finger lingering slightly before he cleared his throat and removed it

“My pleasure” he grinned. You wondered if there might be a kiss but let him take the lead - you didn’t want to set expectations. As he drove you home, you couldn’t help think how sweet this all was - the walk, the lilacs, the ice cream, the moment - but the one thought that kept sticking in your mind was: I really hope there's a second date. He walked you to the door to your apartment building, stopping short of entering the lobby, “I had a really nice time”

“I did too,” you returned, “thank you for… everything. It’s been one of the best dates I’ve had in the city”

“I’m glad,” he smiled, reminding you of your first meeting, “maybe we can do it again?” You felt giddiness take over you and you rushed to agree, hoping that did not throw him off. “Perfect,” he finally said after what felt like a long pause, “then I think the lake is open. It’s another physical activity, I know, but paddle boats are always fun. What do you say?” The smile that spread across your face felt like it might consume you and all you could do was nod your head in agreement, “I will pick you up tomorrow then, same time?”

“I’ll bring the sunscreen,” you joked, “I wouldn’t want to burn.” He smiled at you lightly before placing a small kiss to your cheek, a feeling you’d think about until the very moment he picked you up for each and every date.

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

ofmd s2e1 rewatch where i pause to jot down my thoughts and other random shit

not quite a reaction post bc i've already watched the whole thing. not quite a liveblog bc it's one post and it's probably gonna take me a full hour to get through a 28 minute episode at the rate of pausing and typing i'll be doing

s2e1, s2e2, s2e3, s2e4, s2e5, s2e6, s2e7, s2e8

anyway, pirate time:

i love how much fun con is having choking on his own blood

dream!stede's extremely teary face right before he takes off running down the beach is doing psychic damage to me

also dream!stede's stupid ridiculous outfit with all the long ribbons and shit...

ed and stede make contact so hard shjfkhsgjkfd the loud OUGH sounds from both of them

also the return of ed's old beard! i didnt expect to see her at all this season, so that was a surprise.

"babe" "love" im tearing out my own hair

stede has yet to learn that ripping ass near your beloved can be a love language

stede is a terrible fucking roommate just deal with wee john's gas in silence like the rest of them. goddamn.

WHO HAS THE OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH TRAMP STAMP. WHO IS THAT.

i like when the background OST is familiar to me lol the little strings when stede starts his letter throwing me back to s1

olu: that–that's the swede the swede: Im the swede roach: he's single ;) me: *pissing my pants with laughter*

also the direct confirmation that the swede literally doesn't have a name. incredible

shjkfhdhfkj the crew encouraging him. stede's "it's okay" and roach "be brave" im CRYINGGGGG

stede doing customer service is something that can be so personal. "reservation?" "eat my fuckin' shit" "right! walk-ins, then" average restaurant experience

the random background guy saying "my favorite hand!" abt getting stabbed in the hand is making me giggle. i love the humor on this show

why does stede have so much shoulder movement going on when he's walking through the bar. whore behavior.

"this is for mom!" sorry but i want to know more abt whatever's going on there

also the purple mohawk. dope.

buttons is so distressed LET HIM RETURN TO THE SEA THESE CONDITIONS ARE INHUMANE

"i know the odds of you finding this are slim but so were the odds of us finding each other in the first place" IM RIPPING OFF MY OWN SKIN

also stede's lil sad hopeful smile after throwing the bottle... i care him

i love how they make this wedding fucking suck so we don't feel too bad abt the whole massacre thing. "the natural condition of humanity is base and vile. it is the obligation of people of standing, such as yourselves, to elevate the common human rabble through the sacred transaction of matrimony" if i was at a wedding and the officiant said that i'd also start killing people probably

yayy murder montage :)

FANG BREAKING THAT GUY'S SPINE OVER HIS KNEE

the whole cake scene is so fucking funny im sorry. i love u jim drawing the line at attacking a shitty wedding. i love u archie who wasn't here for the good old days so you dont really see a problem with how things are. i love u frenchie with ur box in ur brain that u never open again. i love u fang it's gonna get better i swear. i love u frenchie again bc u just took the cake right out of fang's hands while he was fucking sobbing hfjhgkjhdkjkf

I MISS IVAN JUSTICE FOR IVAN. wish they could've said he'd just fucked off somewhere instead of dying but i think that would've raised the question of why hasn't anyone else fucked off since they all seem so miserable

very relieved that stede isn't taking the racist/antisemitic caricature drawings of ed to make like a boyfriend scrapbook like some people were theorizing. would've been overkill if after episode 4 from last season stede still didn't realize that ed hated these sorts of depictions of him.

INTERESTING DETAIL THO the background music in this scene is "a pirate's life" aka the song frenchie sang in the pilot. it's an instrumental version obviously but yeah i recognize that tune

also more cool background ppl with dyed hair man i love this show

zheng yi sao flirting with olu is so good. he deserves it.

how nice of ed to offer his drugs to the crew. sharing is caring.

also it's so funny to me that the thing izzy is tormented by is ed saying "you can't do the job, someone else will" the toe thing's happened three times and apparently that was fine but the thing the show edits together right before izzy breaks down into the most pathetic aheemheem whimpers isn't any of that it's ed threatening to fire him

also they cut ed throwing knives at izzy!! what the hell.

releasing the clip of izzy crying kinda ruined it for me when it came time to watch it in the show bc i watched it several times since it dropped and now seeing it in context i was like "ok i've seen this already fast forward." i mean i didnt fast forward through it but i did kinda zone out bc i've seen this bit already. this post kinda sums up my thoughts on it

"trifling ingrate plan" dshkjfshgdskhfjkhgkjh

"SEMI-CLEAN WATER"

JACKIE CALLING THE SWEDE "BOO CAKES"

"i know that guy we had breakfast together!" "you'll be having a lot of breakfasts-es together" "oh, okay" i fucking love this whole dynamic like i can tell they're writing the swede out of most of the episodes for budget reasons (sorry nat faxon) but by god do they give him such an excellent fucking send-off. can't wait to see him again when he's in his trophy husband number 20 era

roach is upset abt not being able to cook, buttons is tied up so he doesn't go running back to the sea (i assume). stede you are not giving your crew the environment they need to thrive.

olu being an optimist :)

buttons opens his mouth to drink the rain and in the background u can see roach yanking the rope around buttons back fhdjskgfjhgkjfh STEDE YOUR SEA WITCH CANNOT THRIVE IN THESE CONDITIONS

stede tries to make things sound good in his bottle letters to ed but out loud he says his actual insecurities... it's so fucking tasty tho that he thinks ed could be doing better without him and THAT'S why he's been stalling so much. not afraid for his life even a little bit he just assumes he's not wanted. brb i have to cry now

"im sorry if that's a little bit creepy" "you are creepy" in this scene where they're soaked from the rain. ofmd said this prince ricky guys is creepy and wet.

stede's fucking FACE when prince ricky says "you're my hero" his fucking "clearly you dont own an air fryer" face I CANT STAND HIMMMMMM (affectionate)

prince ricky "these rubes" "men of our standing" yeah i cant fucking stand this guy (derogatory) i love how he's barely even in this episode

stede's face when the swede is talking abt how happy he is with jackie... my man believes in love so much im gonna cry

also in what fucking way does the swede owe them a life debt. roach and buttons literally tried to eat him

izzy's "you know me better than anyone knows me and i daresay the same about you" this is literally so false i dont even know where to begin. izzy in e6 being like "if i didnt know any better i'd think maybe ed might possibly maybe be actually enjoying bonnet's company" while ed and stede are giggling and making each other friendship bracelets. this guy doesn't know ed at all.

also i cant get over how izzy wont make eye contact he's like staring blankly into the middle distance delivering these lines so flatly until he goes to say "i have... love for you" and in that moment he looks like he'd rather ed were feeding him more toes.

"im worried about you, we all are" not gonna lie my dude you've had a weird way of showing it thus far. where was all that worry when you told him he was better off dead than wearing a robe and singing songs?? where was that fucking love then?

and NOW izzy wants to talk it through. izzy literally voted to make blackbeard great again and now he wants to give open communication a chance???

lmao there's a limit to how many characters can be in a bulleted list so here's fucking. part two. on the same post:

ed asking everyone if the vibe is poisonous and fang cant stop crying and ed's face is just like "eh good enough" im fdhksgfkjtdkh

anyway ed with a loaded gun under his chin talking to himself is hurting me so fucking much actually. ed my beloved babygirl for whom i would die. this poor traumatized man. yes he is making this workplace toxic as hell but god. GOD. im gonna throw up.

the way ed is so fucking casual about shooting izzy in the leg. just calm and jovial as he promotes frenchie to first mate. stepping over izzy all crumpled on the floor. everything about this is so fucking good. i mean it's horrible for ed and everyone around him but for me watching the show this shit is DELICIOUS. i love when the pirates get violent and unhinged i love when this shit gets fucked up. ed's mental state is so bad right now and it is causing me severe anguish but also it is so tasty. fuck.

anyway frenchie trying to turn down the promotion fhjkghdfjkhf

the cut to the swede performing the husbandly duties is INSANE. COMPLETE TONAL WHIPLASH. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

"fuck those hammies up!" spanish jackie i love you

black pete why are you so fucking loud AND WHY WOULD YOU JIX IT LIKE THAT???

why is prince ricky so small. he's like a full head shorter than stede. also this guy is insufferable i love how stede just fucking abandons him fhjkgdhkdfghkj

"the calf muscle is the most mysterious of alllll the muscles" what the FUCK does that even mean. oh swede i will miss you

NOSE REMOVAL FUCK YES. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

obsessed with the swede playing dumb. the dramatic gasp. "wow, so bad!" fhjsghdkjf

"aint you that soup bitch?" "im the money bitch" i love women.

sfdsjkh spanish jackie being into double-crossing. and slapping the swede's ass on the way out. i love this show

i love how zheng says "this much indigo is worth three times what i paid" while spanish jackie and the husbands are still like, right there. and they just don't hear that bit. incredible.

OUGH the back of jim's weird rope armor looks like a ribcage that's so cool

i love how jim is so fucking bad at telling this story. i love how the monkey's paw comes into it. i love fang asking them to do the voice. i love archie trying to hold back her laughter i love jim and fang giggling together I LOVE THIS SHOW

ed's fucking voice breaking through his whole convo with frenchie. im tearing out my own teeth

HEY DID YOU GUYS KNOW THEY HAVE POST-CREDITS SCENES IN THIS SEASON?????????? WHAT THE HELL

i take back what i said about jim being bad at telling this story their version is so much fucking better. squeaky voice "I pray to you, Dark Lord, to make me real flesh! I want to be real flesh!" IM FUCKING OBSESSED. JIM I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

[solarpunkani]

Y'know someone's probably waxed poetic about this already but it's on my mind so I'm gonna do it again.

When it comes to encouraging people to learn about native plants and habitat and involving themselves and their yards in the wider ecosystem, you gotta meet them where they're at.

And maybe that means they won't go as far into it as you are or would like them to in your wildest dreams. But even small steps count towards the bigger picture and I think we need to appreciate that more.

An example from my own life is my mom and the current gardening project we're working on. We're planning out the garden beds in the front of the yard by the mailbox--my mom's previous plantings for the most part haven't worked out, so I'm taking a crack at it.

I'm a pollinator gardening enthusiast who cares more about attracting as many butterflies bees and hummingbirds as possible than keeping things 'neat' and 'tidy'. However, not only do we live in an HOA neighborhood (though not as intense as some other stories I've heard), but I know my mother--an interior designer who has a deeply vested care for making sure the exterior of the house looks as Nice as possible.

We're still getting a pollinator garden in the front though. How? I'm meeting her where she's at, I'm making some concessions, she's making some concessions, but ultimately we're making something that works for the both of us. She doesn't want the plants too tall and messy? We'll trim them back in fall and winter--the insects can use the backyard garden to nest in. She doesn't want things too wild and bushy and weedy? We'll add a nice mulch to the beds, keep things a bit spaced out until they grow in to their larger sizes. She doesn't know the latin names for the plants I'm asking for, let alone how to pronounce them to ask for them at a garden center? That's fine, I don't know the Latin names for most things anyways, let's just use common names.

Does she care that the garden will attract butterflies and hummingbirds? Not intrinsically--she sees it as more of a bonus, if anything. She just cares about what color everything will be and if it'll be easy to maintain. The fact that they're native plants barely registers as a plus side to her. And honestly? That is fine.

If I approached this problem with a hardheaded attitude on how I wanted it to be just as wild and free as my backyard garden? There wouldn't be any native plants in the front beds. It's not like I didn't teach my mom things, but I didn't lecture her like she was lesser just for not knowing or caring as much about native gardening as I do. And that, ultimately, made her more open to the idea than she would've been if I looked down on her like I've seen too many people do to others.

Not everyone is going to develop a deeply seated care about native plants and Latin names and I don't think it's reasonable to expect that. Meet people where they're at and you just might get a lot more done. Meet people where they're at and you just might find they'll get excited enough to learn more--but if they don't want to learn more, that is fine.

We can't expect everyone on the globe to suddenly become plant experts rattling off Latin names left and right and professionally ID'ing native and invasive plants. In the same way we wouldn't expect everyone to suddenly learn the ins and outs of learning code, or how to synthesize medicines, or how to properly build a house. And that is fine. Because we can lean on those who do know when these things come up.

I lost track of where this was going but. Y'know????

[just-a-carrot]

Carrot, I love your art. It is so unique and expressive and the way you portray emotion is so raw. You somehow pack so much character into such simplistic designs and I commend you for that!

I was wondering what your art journey was/is like, if you're okay with telling? When did you start drawing, how did you develop, and how did you get to where you are now?

Thank you!

ahhhh that's really kind ;-; 💕

I feel like I've been drawing even longer than I've been writing. I used to cart my sketchbook around everywhere as a kid and just be sitting in a corner drawing while everyone else was talking or doing stuff

I drew tons of anime growing up, mostly fanart of sailor moon and ranma and fushigi yuugi and stuff like that. I'd also come up with ideas for manga I wanted to draw (my mom had to convince me in junior high that moving to Japan and becoming a manga artist was not a realistic career goal lol) and I would order those physical screentones you had to cut out and place on the paper and use a G-pen with a bottle of ink to ink

most of my life I've drawn on paper and would line by hand, scan it, then color it. I was convinced I couldn't use tablets because I'd only ever tried on a glossy Samsung tablet and I hated it (it wasn't until working on OW that I bought a non-screen tablet and that changed my world)

I ended up getting a degree in studio art drawing because I didn't know what else to do (I started as a music major but didn't like it, wanted to switch to Japanese but my school didn't offer it, so chose art lol). I will not say my time in school radically helped my art... but I did get to do some figure drawing and did do a lot of art. but I felt quite out of place as many of my professors would try to talk me out of my cartoony style (I still remember when we had to share our sketchbooks with the class and mine was full of fanart done in my own style for things like gijinka Mario and Star Fox, but all my classmates told me it felt fake and copied since it was cartoons and not real art... 💦)

anyway......... I tried to go into animation storyboarding after school but couldn't get any ins or leads so I went back to school for Japanese LOL art became just a hobby again. But I continued drawing all the time. When I was in Japan and didn't have a scanner, I started doing mouse drawings in MS Paint. I think this is where my affinity for pixel drawings started. I'd continue to draw, draw, draw for all the fandoms I've been in since. my style evolved and changed a lot, sometimes a bit more cartoony, sometimes a bit more realistic (but still mostly anime-esque style)

I don't think it started turning away from anime entirely until I got into some cartoon fandoms. I think that's when the big ears and noses started to develop. And then a short while later I made Easter, which you can see has a slightly different style than early OW but it was like the precursor. I also returned to the mouse drawn MS paint style for the Easter CGs because I didn't have a scanner. this style continued into my early OW drawings but I guess kinda kept evolving as I kept drawing the chars for years and years. It's become a lot more fluid and organic now and I've gotten more consistent with the style and how I draw the chars

I guess that's it, really!! I feel like I've left out a ton but it already feels so long and I can't really think of anything else specific to add or focus on, so I'll just leave it with that kinda summary I guess 🤣 but ofc if there's anything more specific you want to ask I will do my best to answer!!

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

The Eclipses Show

Pairing: None

Word Count: 1,579 Words

Summary: A good wake up and a bad feelings day for Phase. Crescent has a tantrum.

Warnings: Cursing, Past Death (mentioned), Grieving, Abuse, Trauma, Near-Death Experience (mentioned), Harassment, Minor Violence, let me know if I should add anything else.

Chapter 5: I’m Nothing Like You

Solar woke up with weight on his shoulder and chest like a body on top of his own. What the hell? He was sure it was probably Crescent bothering him again so he simply didn’t respond until-

“Dad…” Phase’s soft voice whispered against his shoulder and Solar opened his eyes as he suddenly remembered the previous day. Umbra was nowhere in sight and Phase was laying tucked up on top of him asleep still. Solar put a hand to Phase’s back and held him there. He did promise he’d stay by them and make sure they woke up.

“Good morning.” Umbra greeted him as he came back with three plates of food. Solar’s body had the function just like their new ones did to turn food into excess battery life but it had been so long since he used the function. It had also been a long time since he was greeted so nicely.

“Morning.” Solar groaned.

“Hold on.” Umbra took a fork full of pancakes and held it up under Phase’s nose. Phase’s nose twitched and then his lips before his eyes cracked open and he craned his head and bit the fork, half awake but obviously simply following the scent of food.

“Mowmim.” Phase greeted around the fork and piece of pancake as best he could.

“Time to stop crushing Solar, sleepyhead. He’s gotta eat too.” Umbra chuckled at Phase’s tired antics.

“Do I get coffee?” Phase asked.

“I got you one better. You get a Red Bull if you stop laying on Solar…for now.” Umbra showed Phase the cold 20oz can and waved it around a little like a prize. Phase almost instantly sat up off Solar and grabbed the Red Bull from Umbra.

“I love you!” Phase told Umbra.

“Love you too, brother.” Umbra patted Phase on the head as Phase framed the plate missing its fork, the fork Phase still had in his mouth. “And I got you iced coffee, Sol. Wasn’t sure how you like coffee so I just went with the maple pecan thing in the Faz-Pad.”

“Can’t go wrong with maple.” Solar smiled a little, sitting up and taking the coffee and plate Umbra offered him.

“I’m more of a peppermint person.” Umbra sat across from the two on Solar’s bed with his own plate and a cup of tea.

“You’re a tea person?” Solar asked, drinking some of his coffee.

“I’ll fall back asleep if I have coffee or energy drink so tea is my main source of caffeine.” Umbra told him.

“Rest in pieces.” Phase told him, stuffing a whole pancake into his mouth.

“‘Rest in pieces’.” Solar snorted at that.

“I pity him.” Phase said, mouth stuffed full of pancake.

“Please chew your food, Phase.” Umbra sighed.

“You’re not my mom!” Phase whined but did as he asked anyway, chewing and swallowing the pancake.

“We don’t have a mom.” Umbra rolled his eyes.

“Technically Sun would be your mom in a way and Corona would technically be mine?” Solar told them.

“Oh hell no. I’d rather not have one.” Phase complained.

“Yeah, no. I��ll be motherless, thanks.” Umbra rolled his eyes.

“Realistically, if we think about it, our respective Moon is our mom, our Kill Codes are our dads, and Sun and Corona were like surrogates.” Solar told them.

“That is…horrifying, thank you.” Umbra sighed.

“Yeah, no thanks. I’ll stick with just having a dad and no mom.” Phase told him but paused. “Had a dad.”

“Are you okay?” Solar asked, holding onto Phase’s hand.

“I miss him. And Bloody.” Phase looked down, eating a bit slower as he tried to mask the guilt and regret he felt.

“It’s okay to miss someone. I’m sure he misses you too.” Umbra told him, patting his shoulder.

“Thank you. It’s just a bad day, I think. I’ll be alright.” Phase gave them a little smile to reassure them.

“Well, when you’re ready to come out, if you want to, I’ll be in the daycare setting up. I have like ten check ins today and I feel like I’ll have more walk ins. You two can do whatever you want today as long as you behave.” Solar told him as he finished off his pancakes and took his plate and fork to the kitchen and stuck them into the dishwasher to be run after dinner tonight.

It was surprisingly easy in the daycare, eight of the ten kids were the well behaved ones with the two rowdy ones playing tag near the ball pit. It was simple to give the eight calm kids some drawing activities and just letting the the other two chase each other with his monitoring to make sure neither killed themself.

Umbra eventually ventured out and helped once the walk-ins began with Phase deciding to stay in their room for the day, too overwhelmed today to really get out of bed or do anything. Solar was sure eventually he’d come out of his grief of his family, they’d help him with getting comfortable with his new family.

Family. Solar already thought of them as family? As brothers? He smiled a little thinking about it. It was nice to actually consider someone his brother.

Phase looked up at the door opening, not turning around since he thought it was either Umbra or Solar telling him it was lunch time. He wasn’t up to getting out of bed. He wasn’t feeling the best today and Umbra had stayed with him for a while, assuring him that feeling like that was fine and that he could take his time adjusting to the new environment.

“Yeah?” Phase asked.

“Worthless extra parasite, get up!” Crescent growled. Phase sighed and turned around to look at Crescent with a bored expression.

“What, backup?” Phase asked.

“Why you little-!” Crescent snarled at the reminder that he was a backup of this universe’s original Moon. “So useless! Can’t even get up and do your job cleaning things during naptime!?” Crescent spat.

“I don’t have to do shit. Just because you’re a prick doesn’t mean you get to bully people into doing things you should be doing.” Phase told him but, realistically he felt a bit of fear pooling up. He could remember that it was Moon who had almost killed him not even two full days ago and Crescent looked like Moon enough that it was making his near death play back in his head.

Flare was gone, he had given himself up and allowed Phase to barely live. Flare had given his life because he had decided Phase deserved a real second chance to change. And he wasn’t going to let Flare’s sacrifice go to waste. But having the visage of your almost-murderer yelling at you was scary.

Crescent stepped more into the room and grabbed Phase by the rays, making him yelp at the pain in the head they created as he gripped them tight.

“You are a mistake! Nobody has ever wanted you just like the other two parasites. If you knew what was good for you, you’d keel over and die like your fucking brothers. Maybe then your daddy would care about you again.” Crescent hissed at him.

“Hey!” Umbra snapped in the doorway, grabbing Crescent’s hand holding Phase’s rays and gripped it tight enough to make Crescent release his grip after a sharp crackle, eyes glowing a crimson that tinged his purple eyes, his bits of the kill code showing through as he was pissed.

Umbra practically threw Crescent from their room onto his ass in the walkway. Phase couldn’t breathe, not that he needed to. He curled up in his bed as the words sank in and he hid his face into his arms, black oil leaking from his eyes as he tried to keep his tears silent.

“Don’t you fucking dare insult my brothers!” Umbra spat at Crescent, shaking with rage. Crescent glared at him as he got up before stalking off, pissed.

The crimson tinge disappeared from Umbra’s eyes as he turned to sit with Phase and pulled him up to hold him.

“It’s okay. Don’t believe him. He’s just an asshole. Never believe someone like him, Phasey. You aren’t a mistake, me and Solar want you. We love you.” Umbra assured him as Phase buried into his arms, hiding so he could cry against him.

“But Dad and Bloody. He said Dad would love me if I died like…” Phase hiccuped.

“Your Dad loved you, he wasn’t the best but he was trying as a new dad. You don’t have to die like your brothers for him to love you because he already did. He’s like us. We’re not the best as expressing ourselves. But he loved you, I know it.” Umbra promised him, rocking him a bit as Solar came to investigate the strange sounds during naptime, keeping track of the kids with his internals.

“What happened?” Solar asked.

“Your asshole tried to harass him and poked at some very raw nerves.” Umbra explained.

“It’s okay, Phase, everything will be okay. I promise. I’m sorry about him, he’s just a prick. Please don’t let his words hurt you too much. He’s just a bully, he likes to hurt people. I’m sorry he targeted you.” Solar sat with them, rubbing Phase’s back.

Before long, Phase was sleeping and holding Umbra hostage with his hands tangled into Umbra’s ruffles, unwilling to let go. Solar went back to the daycare, letting Umbra snuggle Phase while the youngest AI slept.

[gaemms-chamois]

random unorganized darknights trio + paprika musings bc sometimes i'm hit with like a pang of Brief Worry that i'm completely misinterpreted blabla that usually doesn't last too long bc i then go back to my state of I'm Just Vibing but ig at some point i just gotta let it out publicly once and be done with it lol

this is messily written Please Understand this isn't meant to be a grand thought piece

fuuuck ok well this is like very specifically abt the w, ines & paprika part now

like don't get me wrong on this. i joke abt wines moms and stuff but i dont genuinely mean it in the way of wahh wow littol family for reals kinda deal?

less on wines 'adopting' paprika, moreso paprika imprinting on them like a duckling after she was saved by them. paprika adopted them lmao. i cannot possibly interpret either w or ines as Maternal in such a way.

it's moreso that i think it's nice that this little sarkaz merc became part of the story, a girl who all her life since she was infected at a young age, was presented with becoming a mercenary being basically the only option for her.

and then, as annoying as w can be, being shown that she does have different options.

i just think it's sweet that paprika, judging by her voicelines, clearly looks up to w and ines. which is just amplified by the fact that w and ines are notoriously not the most popular people on rhodes lol. and she calls w annoying but still keeps knitting stuff and wanting to gift food to her. like if she often seeks out w and ines to tell them how well she did on something, when they are on the ship, etc. that'd at least indicate that those two humor her.

ALSO IT'S UNOFFICIAL BUT SHOUTOUT TO THAT LITTLE CHUZENJI ART WITH PAPRIKA AND W, INES & TOTTER WEARING KNITTED HATS SO CUTE

OKAY WOO DARKNIGHTS MERCENARY TRIO AND STUFF

cool yeah obviously i fucking love them. i'm not very good at words though and i tend to keep my more elaborate thoughts to just discussions between friends who know how i tick djsfhdfs

just the other day i was smiling to myself during a walk bc holy shit all three are actually playable now and that's not just wishful thinking anymore. anyway chapter 13 also happened and more stuff with the trio happened and Cool Lots of things Happening and my brain is full

they're so found family to me, like in an utterly unconventional way. i mean c'mon with how they act sometimes like- ykno. but like have y'all seen the new furniture set and descriptions that came with hoederer's release it made me go insanse.

but i think especially in ines' case it just kinda highlights that best. considering ines' arts can figure people out (putting that in rather vague terms), it truly means something when someone with her capabilities and temperament has people she chooses to stick by and actually trust. even if she pretends she doesn't by verbally denying it.

like waugh Okay they have a lot to unpack and shit but with them being reunited (take that, W file that said W needs companionship but her friends aren't around anymore) and having a COMPARATIVELY more ""relaxed"" life than before (that one Hoederer file where he just has rather regular days on rhodes), it's just nice to imagine they can finally have something better and figure stuff out. as complicated as the three of them are.

with that said i think it's a given that i despise a nuclear family treatment of the three (aka mom ines, dad hoederer, daughter w).

for one with me being highly doubtful w was a kid/teen at the start of darknights (young? sure, but not that young), which just seems like such a...widespread belief that i really do not get? arknights always put a LOT of emphasis on when a character's story was about them being a kid, 0 of that with w. like something about her expression and big cloak just gave people some different impression, even though she literally keeps looking the same aside from a change of clothes. only instance of w being called a kid during that time i can think of is that one boiler worker in her files but that seems way more like any typical old guy calling anyone on the younger side a kid. hell, even hoederer was called young in darknights, like in a sarkaz's lifespan i can believe that.

and also...hoederer had somewhat of a mentor-like role for w, but if anyone tries to tell me ines ever acted maternal towards w i will chew through your walls. read through darknights memoir and actually pay attention to ines, both w AND ines were pettyass women and they made that so very clear. cannot fathom how anyone can see ines as having been motherly towards w

seriously just feels like a case of Well there is man and there is woman....and this other character so clearly these are mom, dad and kid.

that's not even me being biased towards w/ines, just how i objectively see it. hell, i even ENJOY ines/hoederer, but my enjoyment of it is limited bc for some reason ppl like to make it weird by shoving w in as some daughter. i promise it's completely possible to like ines/hoederer without trying to fit in w as a kid figure

anyways yeah like cool i like these characters I Guess. Look at them

[nightwalker6200]

Snippet from Ine the End, I'm Just a Loser...

Tiny snippet as i work on the Kagiura/ Hirano sickfic :)

... flashback thing...

“…anyway, I’m still waiting for Yuki to get back from Sendai. Her family comes back next weekend, so we’ll probably head back to University, maybe, like two days later,” His brother took a slow sip from his drink, holding up two fingers as their mother sat down at the table. Their father nodded, running a hand through his hair as he placed an arm around their mom, “We’re just really happy you and Yuki were able to come home for a few weeks.”

“Yeah, and I finally have a cool sister-in-law instead of these dorks,” His older sister pointed towards his younger sisters as both stuck their tongues out. He smirked, grabbing his chopsticks, thanking his mother for the food before passing the Agadashi towards his youngest sister. The 7-year-old grabbed a piece of tofu, beaming towards him as she continued swinging her legs under the table. Despite being across from him, Kagiura could feel her small feet kicking towards his shins each time… his knee jerking every time her cold toes touched his skin. He glared in her direction as she smirked, trying to reach her leg further so her foot could land on his thigh.

“Akkia-kun, have any plans during the break?”

            The 16-year-old glanced towards his mother, shaking his head, “Hm. Not really. Probably practice some.”

            “Ugh, Akira,” His older sister groaned, “I swear you’re more into basketball than you are girls. Go out! Live your life! I mean, at this rate, you’ll end up-”

            “Like you, Akari?” His brother cut her off as Akari directed her attention towards him, “Please, Akio, the only reason you met Yuki was because you were the dumbass who fell down a flight of stairs, and she had to help you to the nurse.”

            “A match made in Heaven,” Akio pretended to swoon, his hand over his heart.

            “For the love of everything, don’t get him started on Yuki again!” His 11-year-old sister groaned, putting her head on the table as their father laughed. Kagiura nodded towards his father as he gestured towards the curry. His sister continued, “Oh, Asami, Yuki’s so beautiful. Oh, Asami, Yuki’s the greatest. Oh, Asami, she’s the love of my life… we get it, Akio! You’re in love.”

            “Well, sorry for having a heart, Asami.”

            Under the table, Aya’s foot connected with the 16-year-old’s shin causing the teenager to slam his knee against the table. He grit his teeth, glaring towards her as she reached for another piece of Agadashi, smirking.

            “Dude, if you get any taller, we’re gunna have to stand to eat,” Akio mumbled, glancing towards Kagiura as he straightened his cup. The teenager rolled his eyes before taking a sip from his tea. He sat up straighter, pulling his legs as close as he could, hoping it’d keep them out of the danger zone. He let out a sigh, picking his chopsticks up again as Aya started taking more interest in her food versus his legs. It was his fault really; he’d been the last one to sit down, and everyone knows, loser sits across from the 7-year-old. What a nightmare.

            “Have you met anyone as freakishly huge as you?” Akari asked, pulling some green peppers from the curry, moving them towards the side of her plate. She reached for some dumplings as their father cleared his throat, “Come on, he’s not that tall.”

            “You’re kidding, right? He’s a tree.”

            The 16-year-old snorted, taking a few bites as his father tried recalling how tall his father and grandfather had been. No one in his family was particularly short, but no one quite reached Kagiura’s height either…

            “Okay, fine, Dad. Akira,” Akari cleared her throat, “How tall is your roommate?”

            The teenager thought for a second before smirking, “He’s like 175cm, I think… it’s kind of cute.”

            “Cute?”

Kagiura nodded in response, pulling his own peppers from the curry, grimacing as he did so. If Hirano was here, he’d eat them… wait, did Hirano even like peppers? He always took them from the younger’s plate because he knew Kagiura didn’t like them, but…

“Hey, Dad, do you like snow peas?”

His father glanced towards him, an amused look on his face, “Why? Did you bring some?”

Akari and Akio both broke out laughing as Kagiura shook his head, “No. I-I mean, I know Mom doesn’t like them, and you always take hers… so, I just didn’t know if you liked them too, or if you only ate them because she didn’t like them.”

His mother laughed softly, gripping his father’s shoulder as his father smirked, “Uh… I don’t particularly care for them, I guess… but, I eat them so she doesn’t have to.”

His mother poked her husband’s cheek, “I’ll start eating them then, dork.”

“As long as I’m around, my love, you’ll never have to.”

His mother huffed softly before kissing him, “My hero.”

The 16-year-old grinned as his father rolled his eyes, making a face towards his wife before reaching for the gyoza. Kagiura hummed softly to himself as he took a few more bites, and Akio stopped laughing long enough to blurt, “What kind of question was that? I mean, really, Akira?”

The teenager pouted, earning a head shake from his brother before he continued eating.

“I dunno,” Kagiura shoved Akari playfully as his older sister mocked him, “I was just thinking how my roommate eats my green peppers because he knows I don’t like them… and he uses his time to help me study and comes to my games. Sometimes, he even brings me drinks or snacks for after...”

He smirked as he took another bite. His middle sister glanced in his direction, an eyebrow raised as she rested her chin in her hand, “Really?”

“Yeah, and he… makes time to eat with me when I’m sick and wakes me up when I sleep through my alarm,” Kagiura put his chopsticks down as Aya kicked towards him. He reached under the table, grabbing her foot, holding it as the younger struggled.

“I mean, he does all these things… when he doesn’t have to. Even when I’m being a brat. He’s always encouraging me… and when I’ve had a bad day, he just makes everything… better… I guess- I guess I was just wondering if Dad ate snow peas for the same reason, you know? If he ate them because he liked doing those things for Mom...”                      

Aya yanked her foot from Kagiura’s grasp, and the teenager straightened, wiping his hand on his leg as Akari clicked her tongue. He glanced towards her as she reached for her drink, and their father shifted before grabbing a piece of Agadashi. Across from him, his brother snorted, “Pft, what are you, gay?”

Gay? No. Right? He liked Hirano; hell, he wanted to be more than friends, more than roommates with him! Every time he saw him, he wanted more. He wanted to kiss him, to touch him for longer than 10 seconds, to sleep next to him – every time, more. It was selfish. He was. And now he had a year to try to get that point across to his oblivious crush? But liking Hirano – that didn’t make him… gay, right? He’s never felt that way about any other guy, but then again, he's never felt this way about any girl either…

“Uh… I-I think so. Yeah,” The 16-year-old mumbled; his eyes cast downward as he clenched his hands in his lap. Chopsticks fell against glass as his older sister choked on her tea, quiet filling the air. A shiver ran down the teenager’s spine with each awkward tick from the clock on the wall. Kagiura shifted slightly, glancing up, letting out a slow breath as he realized everyone was staring at him. Beside him, his sister coughed several times before putting the tea down, and the 16-year-old stole a quick glance at his parents.

His father had his eyes narrowed slightly, a look Kagiura knew that meant he was thinking while his mother’s hand still hovered over the gyoza in the middle of the table, frozen. Everyone seemed… frozen, and the teenager swallowed as every second ticked by, every second making him feel more and more uneasy, sick. This was a lot easier in his head. Simpler… fuck.

“You… you’re gay?” His mother asked quietly, her hand slowly dropping down until her chopsticks met the dish’s edge. Kagiura glanced back down at his hands, still clasped in his lap. He felt sick. Like he was going to puke. Wrong. He felt messed up, and he swallowed hard as his breathing picked up. Shit, if this was a bad idea… then. Shit… he felt like crying. The 16-year-old shifted his gaze upward again, meeting his mother’s green eyes. He nodded, “Uh… yeah, maybe…”

Whether or not it was totally true, Kagiura wasn’t really sure. All he knew was he was in love with Hirano… and if that made him gay, if that labelled him… then sure. Not everything needs a label, you know – a sentiment Niibashi had made after Kagiura tried to figure out where he stood as far as romance. Love is love – if you like someone, then you like them. Not everything needs a label… If saying he was gay made it easier, then that was fine. He liked Hirano. No. He loved Hirano, and he wanted to be able to talk about him with his family the same way his brother talked about his wife. It just made sense. So, if this was his way of making that happen, then he’d take it… at least for now.

“Well,” His father cleared his throat after a few minutes, “whoever you date, you better hope he likes basketball, because it’s not like you have anything else going on in that head of yours.”

Kagiura let out a breath as laughter met his ears. He huffed, rolling his eyes as the quiet evaded; the sound of food being passed around and chopsticks against porcelain crushing any lingering panic. He relaxed his hands, taking another breath as his older sister passed him some rice, his mother pointing towards the gyoza again as her eyes wandered around the table. A silent question of who wanted some.

Conversation filled the eating area, his father and mother exchanging soft looks towards each other. To his left, his 11-year-old sister tried to steal a dumpling from his plate, shoving him when he crammed it in his mouth quickly. He made a face towards her, and she shoved him harder. He smirked before glancing down at his plate, a slow frown filling his face as he realized someone had piled peppers on it. The 16-year-old grimaced as he picked one up, glancing towards his right as his older sister avoided his gaze. Across the table his youngest sister and mother started laughing.

Kagiura put the pepper down, looking towards his brother before Akio rolled his eyes and gestured towards his plate. Out of all his family, his father, Akio, and Aya were the only ones who liked peppers… a fact that left the teenager both disturbed and grateful.

His brother pulled a majority of the peppers from the 16-year-old’s plate before glancing towards Kagiura’s right, “Hey, Akari, maybe Akira will get a boyfriend before you.”

Kagiura felt his face blush. He fixed his gaze on the plate in front of him, shoving some rice in his mouth as heat met his cheeks. His sister groaned loudly, punching him in the arm, “I swear to God, Akira – if that happens, I will destroy every single jersey you own!”

 The teenager winced, jabbing her with his chopsticks as he jerked his head towards her, “Yeah, well, maybe, if you weren’t so mean...”

A murderous look painted across his sister’s face as Kagiura trailed off. Although Akari was most likely joking, there was always an underlying threat. Unlike his little sisters, his older would follow through… but destroying jerseys… seemed a little unnecessary. After a few moments, she scoffed dramatically before smiling, grabbing several gyoza and dropping them on his plate. Somehow, the smile was more off-putting than the threat.

Asami stabbed him with her elbow, “Akira already has a boyfriend!!”

The teenager coughed harshly, choking on a dumpling as he reached for his drink. He cleared his throat before putting his hands up quickly as his brother laughed.

“What! No, I don’t!”

Akari groaned again, slumping in her chair dramatically as Kagiura shook his head, “I don’t!”

His father raised an eyebrow, his mother smirking towards him as Akari straightened her posture, flipping Akio off as he threw some rice at her. Across the table, Aya started singing loudly, “Aa-kun likes Hirano-san! Aa-kun likes Hirano-san!”

            The teenager’s face turned bright red as he tried to scowl towards his sister, throwing an abandoned pepper in her direction, “Shut up!”

            The 7-year-old pulled her eyelid down, sticking out her tongue as she continued to sing to the same melody, swinging her legs again. His mother hummed softly as Akio and Akari started arguing, “Hirano… is that the boy you brought to your grandfather’s over the summer? He seemed nice.”

            “Yeah, a lot nicer than Akira… and he definitely looked better too!”

            Kagiura groaned, covering his face with his hands, “Oh my God, Asami, shut up!”

            “Make me, snow pea!”

[a-stubborn-little-fish]

So when Israel assassinated Iran’s leader I had a whole mental breakdown with snot and tears. I gathered my mom and brother in the living room and told them what’s gonna happen. My little brother wants to be a Marine. I have no fucking clue why because he is in no way cut out for that life. Nor does he seem to understand the intensity of it. Right now he’s 15 and I’m hoping in the next 3 years he will finally mature a little (if at all) and come to his senses and realize that a military life does not suit him.

Anyway, what I told them was this; the US is going to war. Maybe not right now but eventually Iran will retaliate and give Israel an opportunity to declare war. Biden has never kept his word on anything since he was elected. He is supplying weapons to Israel. He said he would NOT get us into another war. That’s bullshit and I don’t believe him. He is going to make us join the fight on Israel’s side and the Republicans are gonna back him up because they are all too stupid to realize that this is the perfect opportunity for Biden to get re-elected.

Democrats and Republicans are both funded by AIPAC which is basically just Israel paying our politicians for their loyalty and support. So almost everyone in an elected position right now is a Zionist. Enablers, supporters, traitors. All of them. Anyone who isn’t a Zionist hasn’t done shit to stop them so they are complicit as well.

Basically, all odds are stacked in the favor of the pedophilic Christian nationalists known as the U.S Government. The people have been brainwashed and indoctrinated for generations through the manipulation of our education system, lack of funding for infrastructure, gerrymandering, media monopolies peddling misinformation, and intentional destruction of community and culture, especially among areas with a high population of minorities. They have turned everyone against each other and thus there is no class solidarity in America. Because of this there is no armed rebellion or organized violent protest. There is just a smattering of walk outs and sit ins and everyone who has studied history knows that peaceful protest is a waste of time and effort.

There will be no resistance. There hasn’t been in a while. The rise of Nazi Germany happened just like this. It’s going to happen again. Except this time it’s happening to the most powerful and imposing nation in the world. A nation with the world’s largest Navy, Air Force, and Army. And all of our military branches are going to get bigger. Congress passed a law that now automatically registers every male 18 years or older for the Selective Service. This means that when the US enters the war with Israel, there may be a draft and that draft will include every man of age in the US. It’s possible that enough Zionists will enlist and the draft won’t be necessary but still there’s a precedent for that kind of fuckery and we call it Vietnam. That’s why my little brother was included in this convo. I do not want to see him forced to fight and die for a country that isn’t his.

The second part of that convo was explaining that a war will accelerate climate change resulting in the AMOC collapsing. This will devastate entire ecosystems. We already knew that with overfishing continuing at this rate that there won’t be enough fish left in the sea by 2050 to support the fishing industry and that will result in a whole lot of impoverished people starving to death. AMOC collapse wouldn’t just speed that up it would wipe out entire species. It will also create bigger, stronger, hurricanes, raise sea levels to catastrophic heights and eliminate coastal civilizations. Even worse it would create a perpetual drought for the Amazon Rainforest killing 10% of the world’s biodiversity. It will make the southern hemisphere hotter and the northern hemisphere colder. People will freeze death, die of heatstroke, dehydration, starvation, or fall victim to a natural disaster. The last time the AMOC slowed it ushered in an Ice Age. If the US military increases emissions they will speed us towards the next, and possibly final, Mass Extinction.

Of course, I was told that I am jumping to conclusions and that I needed to calm down and stop spiraling. Maybe I am spiraling. But the thing is, in 2019 I told my mom I needed face masks. She asked why and I explained that every 100 years humanity experiences a global pandemic. The last one was in 1920 so the next will be 2020 and since I’m immunocompromised I wanted to make sure I’m protected. I also told her that the news was saying there’s a new unidentified virus in China and I think it’s very likely that that will become the next pandemic. She also told me that time I was spiraling and that I needed to stay off the internet for a while. Anyone wanna guess what happened the next year?

I don’t think I’m spiraling anymore. I think I’m right, because today, on what is likely to be our final Independence Day thanks to a deeply corrupt Supreme Court’s complete undermining of the rule of law and the complete lack of enforcement of the checks and balances that is outlined in our Constitution, Iran has retaliated against Israel.

The reason this is terrifying is because this gives Biden the perfect reelection campaign. Trump is a felon and hated even by Republicans so he already has a leg up. He’s also .05% less Hitler than Trump so to the average liberal he still looks great. Thanks to the recent Supreme Court decision he also has the power of a monarch or dictator. He said he wouldn’t use this new power but like I said he’s always full of shit. What is likely to happen is that in order to secure his seat of power he will rally the Zionists to his cause and bring the US into a new war on the side of Israel. We all know the popular vote is useless and the Electoral College is rigged so if he does take us to war he’s basically guaranteed reelection. Republicans and Democrats alike are chomping at the bit to commit war crimes because they all invest in defense contractors so war will just line their pockets even more.

The speed at which we head towards total destruction is now entirely in the arthritic hands of a drugged up dementia patient. And as I sit here listening to fireworks in the distance that ironically mimics the sound of the artillery we supply to Israel, I am so incredibly heartbroken. When compared to the entirety of Earth’s history, humanity is but a flash in the pan. We have barely even begun and we are already almost gone. It is quite literally the end of the beginning and the beginning of the end. What a waste of potential. Or maybe there was never any potential. Maybe the reason we haven’t found other intelligent life is because it is a curse. Doomed to destroy ourselves and comprehend our own suffering. Maybe this universe is better off without the spark of life.

I can only hope that I am wrong. I want to be humiliated. I want to be embarrassed that I would ever think such a future awaits. But so far, I have only been proven right. Now the only hope I have left is that this world which is so deeply ironic in the worst of ways is just a cruel simulation created by some incomprehensible higher power. That we are toys in the hands of creation. That all this cruelty and suffering had a purpose, even if it was just to amuse some omnipotent evil.

Maybe Hell is real. Maybe this is it. Maybe we are just existing in the forms most suited for our miseries.

[just-antithings]

that “Grandpa and Grandma Turn Young Again” anime is comedy but the way they make the “innocent incest” jokes is super hilarious to me

So the anime is set up in a way that compiles smaller stories of the life of Grandma Ine and Grandpa Shizou. They have a son, who is married to a woman and they have a daughter together

Ages aren’t mentioned, the grandpa only revealed that they have been together for at least 70 years, and their granddaughter is likely a middle schooler

anyway, from the first episode on the granddaughter thinks her grandpa is super hot. She asks him to play at being her boyfriend

the Son’s wife discovers the de-aged (?) grandparents next and has a similar reaction like her daughter, she actually has to go to the bathroom and calm down because the grandpa is a hottie haha

they’re both fans of male idols and think the grandpa fits the image

then their son, daughter and his wife meet the grandparents together. The son is not surprised, but rather frustrated he wasn’t told of this sooner

he asks his daughter if that’s what she was playing at with her grandpa being her bf, she says her grandpa got what she was playing at and she was just “so happy”

right after she cuddles her grandpa, her mom chastises her and protests “this isn’t allowed, not even in fiction!”

they bicker with each other over grandpa, this gets grandma jealous and grandpa says he only has eyes for grandma, which earns him a slap (mainly for enticing their granddaughter hahaha)

later on the granddaughter learns that her grandpa was actually in an arranged marriage before marrying grandma and grandma was the one who scared the girl he was promised to away

He says her grandma acted really cool, so the granddaughter wishes to reenact the scene.

The grandma does so, says something like “you will never have my man!” which in turn impresses the granddaughter so much that she hugs her grandma and says “I love grandpa, but I love you very much too!”

this in turn causes the grandpa to become jealous and the episode ends with him saying “I’m so glad I married grandma” hahaha

That sounds hilarious im going to have to check it out

[westadventure24]

Day 11 - Take Me Out To The Ball Game!

After a goodnight of restful slumber at the hotel, it was time to see if we could continue to keep our plans for the day a secret from the parentals until right up to the moment we arrived at Target Field, where the Minnesota Twins would be playing our lifelong favorite baseball team, the Cincinnati Reds.

When we began planning this trip and Todd mentioned we would be going through Minneapolis, I asked him if there would be any chance of the Twins playing the Reds. He initially said no, as they aren’t even in the same league. Being the stubborn person I am, I looked it up anyway and, to our surprise, they were actually going to be playing! We decided right then and there that it had to be worked into our trip as a special surprise. You see, Mom and Dad rarely miss watching every minute of every game on TV. Well, Dad likely sleeps through many innings, but it is something Mom really looks forward to.

We worried that she would figure it out. She had asked if they won the Saturday evening game and where the series was being played. Of course, we told her they won the matchup, but weren’t sure where they were playing…first of many white lies meant to protect our Sunday afternoon surprise.

After taking Lily for an early Sunday morning walk and then eating our free hotel breakfast in the lobby, Todd and I took some of the delicious cuisine (deep underlying sarcasm) up to Mom and Dad because they preferred to eat in their room. We told them to take their time getting ready and that we would leave around 10:30 to go see Wabasha Caves. White lie number two.

After getting ready to go, we went to their room to ensure they were ready and to make sure Mom’s bag would meet the ballparks requirements. Luckily, they were both dressed appropriately so no need to convince anyone to change. I was a little worried as Dad doesn’t normally wear shorts, but did take our suggestion to do so for the day’s activities. However, they wanted to take jackets. We told them they didn’t need to, but they were concerned about it being damp and cold in the caves and at least wanted to take them to leave them in the RV. Causing us yet to come up with another white lie. At this point, I may be driving the bus to hell because I don’t think I have ever lied this much in my entire life!

We had planned to take an Uber so we could be dropped off right at the gate, alleviating the need for parking and a walk that might create any difficulty. Todd had to tell them we were taking an Uber because the caves were near downtown and there were many unexpected events that day…Vikings were playing at home and some kind of street race, which would make it hard to find parking.

As we were nearing the ballpark, Dad even said “There’s the team store for the Twins. Must be close to the ballpark.” As we reached our destination and thanked our driver, we piled out less than 100 yards away from the entry gate. Mom looked at us and said, “where do we go now?” Surprise! We are going to the ballgame! I don’t think she believed us for a minute.

She was so happy!! We took a few photos outside and then went through the gate.

The first view of the field and the sounds of the professional ballpark never get old. The pristine field, the smell of hot dogs that can only be produced at the ball park, the crack of the ball hitting the bat, the sound of ball hitting the leather webb of the glove, and the sight of a few players from both teams, running and stretching as their prepare for the day’s competition. Nothing like the game that has been America’s favorite for well over 150 years. Especially, when featuring the Cincinnati Red Legs, who played in the very first professional baseball game!

Once we got a drink and found where our seats would be, I took Mom down to the Cincinnati side to see if we could encounter any of the players. Mom was hoping to see Jake Fraley, but most of the players had left the warmups by the time we made it down there…all except one. Nick Martinez, pitcher, was so kind and gracious and was more than happy to take a picture with this lovely Septuagenarian!

It was almost time for the game to begin! We got food quickly to eat at our seats just in time for the singing of the National Anthem. It was time to PLAY BALL!! Minnesota should be given their props. The fans and the workers were all very welcoming to these strangers from Ohio. I particularly get a kick out of the guy feeding himself in our selfie taken later in the game. 😂 Further, the Twins organization appear to give so much back to their community in many ways…raising money for children’s hospice and respite care to offering so many opportunities for local youth to participate in pre, during and post game activities.

As any Reds fan is concerned, the game was stellar right up until the bottom of the 6th inning when our 2 to 1 lead went south quickly. The final score ended up 9 to 2 Twins. Boo hiss! We didn’t let the loss ruin our day as a good time was had by all!!