#my longest fic needs an edit and i know it
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
repeated note to self: AVOID FANFIC REDDIT D: D: D:
#i just think. it is interesting. that they'll openly slag off shorter works in general while spouting 'some people prefer those!' platitudes#but on the rare occasions someone dares to venture that most longfics have pacing issues or whatever they FLIP THEIR SHIT LOL#and get very defensive about “no MY work longer than LotR NEEDS to be that long! it's full of subplots and character development!”#yet from the sounds of it the premise is actually fairly thin and they have no idea how good it is or isn't.#OH YEAH BY THE WAY it seems many longfic readers just lose their ability to judge fiction by normal standards#if everything you read of any length leaves you worried about what you'll read next and NOTHING ELSE then that *is* a problem#for which i am willing to invent the term 'disordered reading.'#oh EVERY published novel feels rushed to you? how about you're just used to padded longwinded shite because of fandom?#where Nanowrimo/Big Bang length (50k words) is not even considered 'long' by many readers.#oneshot writer blues#my longest fic needs an edit and i know it#so why is THAT the only one that ever made a rec list in this fandom? eh? eh eh eh? we all know the answer to that!#fanfic life
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
50,000 words. 50k words of aki sex. five zero zero zero zero. aki sex.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/37ab52ab0f40896e50d9573f50a00add/a6588196871b0181-d1/s540x810/0249a0bcc4f2b1855822b96de60fdf939a692cfb.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9250d975c859ddaf61dcce1767708aeb/a6588196871b0181-13/s250x250_c1/982360ba8761fc31e216de38653a9be644b08cfc.jpg)
#don't mind the fact that I was supposed to reach this work count like two weeks ago uhhhhhhhh#I haven't had time to write more than like 200 words a day recently I'm sorry...#BUT HEY I DID IT OKAY#I'm about like... halfway done with the seggs#and then after that I have the ending portion to write#and there may be a small epilogue#after that I need to edit and proofread the whole second chapter#AND THEN. THEN AND ONLY THEN. WILL I FINALLY BE FREE#godddddd this fic has held me hostage for far too long#I think somewhere around 60k words will be the final word count#when I reach that milestone I'm actually done I swear#why is this my longest fic to date by a long shot too I don't even know#I wanna say expect the first chapter sometime next month but...#I know me and I know that me has a lot of work and I know that shooting for september is a healthier goal#WHAT DAFAQ BY THE WAY IT'S ALREADY JULY AND THEN IT'S GONNA BE AUGUST AND THEN IT'S GONNA BE SEPTEMBER. WHAT THE FUCK.#this is. crazy
73 notes
·
View notes
Text
i’m planning on posting my new fic asap, bc i literally cannot wait any longer, i must release her into the world!!!
#i’m thinking the first two chapters one after the other#maybe not on the same day but we’ll see#i gotta finish chapter 2 then edit so *tilly from miranda voice* bare with#i also have a thing i wanna post for it but it’ll make more sense after the fic has actually dropped#bc it’s mildly spoilerly#but like still a tiny bit out of context?#idk i also need to remember to post the playlist#and also the one for the bomb bc i forgor#but i’m having so much fun with this fic#she’s on my mind so bad i worked on her on holiday oops#but it was still fun and relaxing so it’s fine#holidays are for writing tomgreg everyone knows that#also thematically relevant (😉)#but yeah#i have a feeling this fic is gonna be a BEAST#like maybeeee my longest fic?#bc i’m definitely gonna have more chapters than crack the window#but we’ll have to see about the word count#maybe i’ll even get to double digit chapter count?#wouldn’t that be crazy?#yeeee!!#i’m having such fun!!!#gwen rambles#gwenposting
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i literally cant believe how close i am to being done
#fight scene is almost done + p/rn + minor epilogue and im . thats it. i just need to edit a bit and . wow#thank you ame and the three people i know for sure who will be reading . means the world#im literally not even sure what ill do when its over#sorry this is one of those projects that like#alters me at a metaphysical level i really think its challenged me as a writer more than ever#its not even my longest project its just the one ive put the most thought into#its dc so again. not expecting TOO much but. wow.#i promise i will be online when im recovered like kjfdkhgkjfdgd#its taken me 8 months to finish this fic . like okay#i took a break to format for part one#est. final wc is like 34k ish maybe more#wowowow
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2e12eece92f6a4d6552b2e1b7a8bcea4/6d816bdbec8bcf1e-93/s540x810/37bbd1d2d5c07bfede6033f3cc7e3cc1a833706e.jpg)
It’s Always Been You
🍎F!reader, pet names: (pip/squeak, my girl, sweetheart,) suggestive but not smut, fluff, hurt/comfort, brief miscommunication and lots of groveling but it works out.🍎
Notes: I struggle with editing. This is totally separate from canon bc I’m heartbroken. It’s also my first lads fic, I’ll ALWAYS be a Sylus girlie but Caleb broke my brain for a minute 😭
Poll for a possible part 2 -> Taglist signup for part 2
Caleb joining the DAA wasn’t the problem at hand…No, it was the fact that you were going to be separated. Spending his last night before he leaves wrapped around each other like you always did when things were tough was the best comfort you could get.
“I’m gonna miss you so much, do you really have to go?” This was going to be the longest you’ve ever been apart since you were kids, and even worse, he wasn’t allowed to have his phone.
This wasn’t any easier on him but he couldn’t just back out. “I’ll be home before you know it, don’t worry too much.” Caleb brushed the hair from your eyes and held you closer, “plus, you get to have six months free of my constant nagging.”
That was absolutely the wrong thing to say, the tears you were holding back finally fell. Your hands that were originally wrapped around his waist were now at his chest, between your bodies and fisted tightly in his shirt. “But I love you and your nagging!” You inhaled like you were suffocating. Perhaps you were, under the weight of his impending absence.
“Shh I know, I love you and being a pain in your ass.” That earned him a wet chuckle. “I swear, as soon as I’m home I’ll fulfill my promise and I won’t leave your side. You’ll never have to worry again, about anything.” A soft kiss to your temple solidified his vow.
It took you a few long moments before you were able to get in a proper breath and process what he said. “You made a promise?”
“Don’t remember? Hm that won’t do. Think back to when you were 18, and that boy you had a crush on rejected you and broke your heart.”
“I’d prefer not to remember that, actually.”
“But remember after? When you still hadn’t come home by dinner and I found you alone at the park?” Large hands ran down the length of your back to help soothe you while he spoke.
You’re still lost but it’s coming back to you. Confessing to your crush in the park was supposed to be perfect— except he not only rejected you, but he made fun of you. You could respect rejection, but the way he humiliated you and made a scene wasn’t something you wanted to think about. “That day was awful.”
“You were so upset. I wanted to beat him to a pulp but you didn’t want to be alone. Remember what I told you? The pinky promise we made? It’s only been four years you know, I’d hope your memory isn’t that bad yet.”
The moment flooded you then with a gasp, ‘You’ll never be alone as long as I live sweetheart, and when it’s time, when I finally graduate and become a pilot, I swear I’ll marry you myself to prove it.’ And at the time it made you giggle, because surely he was just joking to cheer you up, right? “You meant it?”
Caleb chuckled and lifted your chin to look at you directly, “of course I did, it’s always been you and me. Don’t you know that?”
A fresh wave of tears formed as you surged forward to meet his lips with yours- and stopped out of embarrassment before you could make contact. “Sorry, I didn’t- I think I’m just being emotional—”
But the space between you closed once again and before you could overthink it, Caleb was kissing you the way he’s wanted to for years. His lips were all consuming and tender. His palm cupped your face like it was glass and you couldn’t resist running your fingers through his hair. Kissing Caleb felt like home, like everything was right.
He tried to break away to bring you both air but you refused to let him, instead pulling him closer and closer until he was on top of you, spreading your legs to accommodate his size. “Slow- slow down, you still need oxygen.” You shook when he started dragging his kisses down your throat, letting out soft moans when gentle sucks were left behind.
“C-Caleb…”
He pulled back and grew tense as if he was afraid he scared you away, “what’s wrong, you tired?” He was trying to give you an out if you wanted it.
You were certain your cheeks were flushed, you shook your head. “I want… more…”
Caleb groaned and buried his face in your neck “you’re killing me, Pip.”
Had you said something wrong? “Sorry- I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable… I’ll just-” you loosened your arms from around him, thinking you somehow embarrassed yourself yet again.
He stopped you. “You’re not going anywhere, sweetheart. You’re killing me because you have no idea how badly I want you; how long I’ve wanted you.”
“Really?” Having someone like Caleb love you was the best feeling, but him being attracted to you left you wanting him even more.
Deciding to just show you, he ground his hips into yours. And god, it felt good against you. Just that little bit of contact felt better than anything you ever achieved on your own. “You’re-” hard went unsaid. He grunted when you spread your legs wider for him. “Yeah, I am. And if you want me, then you have me. But you can’t take it back, so if you’re not ready for that commitment…”
“Can I tell you a secret?”
“This really isn’t the time for that—”
“Shut up, it’s important.” He sighed and let you continue. Your arms dropped from his neck to hold his face in your hands, brushing the stray hairs from his face. “That guy I had a crush on? I only liked him so much because he reminded me of you. So I’m yours, too. If you want me, then you can take me.”
Words were lost on him so actions took hold, “are you sure?” His kisses resumed their path after meeting your lips, the room grew hotter with each new brush against your skin.
“I trust you, Caleb,” you had no idea your neck was so sensitive, your gasps talking for you. “but I should let you know I’ve never done this before.”
“I’d kill anyone who ever touched you if you had”
“Isn’t that hypocritical? Should I hunt down your past lovers?” You worked his shirt over his head, the dog tag necklace you gave him mere hours ago dangled in front of your face.
He chuckled and discarded your top, your sleep shorts were next. “It’s funny how you think I’d ever want someone that isn’t you.” His revelation hit you full force: he loves you so deeply, there’s truly no doubt to have. “I’d never do this with anyone else.”
Two things happened that night: your bond was solidified, and unbeknownst to you, a life was created
The goodbye was brutal the next day, already missing him terribly before night fell again.
You managed to fall into a routine, though. You would go to work, occasionally spend time with friends— Tara spent the night with you at least once a week to keep your mind off of things; and the days she didn’t you laid in bed desperately wishing he would be by your side.
Your routine was solid, until a month into your separation when you were sick almost every single day. You were fed up by the time a week passed and the day after that you made your way to visit Zayne- who congratulated you because in his words, ‘he and his wife were expecting as well, perhaps they’ll be friends, too.’ Finding out you were pregnant without Caleb with you was difficult, there wasn’t a way to reach him and share the news.
But you weren’t alone anymore. You spent the time you felt lonely talking to your baby now, who definitely couldn’t hear you yet but that didn’t matter. You were kept company with a perfect blend of you and your Caleb.
According to the official statement released last week Caleb would be home any time today, any minute, any second.
The anticipation left butterflies in your tummy, your baby moving with your nerves. It didn’t occur to you that he might not be happy to be a father, that you might’ve been presumptuous that he’d be ready to care for another life so soon.
And when the door flew open, as much as you wanted to jump into his arms (carefully, of course,) you held your breath and waited for him to notice. And of course, because he was your Caleb, it was right away. His happiness and relief fell away to shock and— was that anger? You didn’t expect anger…
“Welcome home, I—”
“Who else has been here?”
“What? I mean Tara has been keeping me company a few times a week but that’s it.”
“What man has been in our home, pipsqueak.” He didn’t phrase it as a question, just a demand. He’s never been so terse with you…
His tone made you anxious, “No one, other than Zayne and his wife for dinner occasionally— Caleb what are you talking about?”
Caleb dropped his bag on the floor with a thud, still not moving from his spot. “I’m talking about the fact that I came home after six months and you didn’t seem to miss me at all, nothing like the way I missed you. How else would you be pregnant? So who is he? Someone from the Hunters Association?”
Oh… he thought… “Oh my god how could you think- I’d never cheat on you Caleb— EVER how could you even think—”
“Well, I certainly couldn’t have knocked you up in the time I’ve been away.”
A knife cut through you at his words, the accusation, the betrayal of thinking you’d ever be with anyone else. And how vulgar it was… Did your first time mean so little? Was it something he just wanted to get out of the way before he left? A sob escaped you, tears spilled over. “You’re an asshole, Caleb.”
His eyes went wide, “I’m the asshole here?”
“Yes! You’re a fucking asshole! I expected you to be shocked but accusing me of cheating on you? Thinking that night was nothing? That’s low. I can’t believe you!”
“That night means everything to me!”
“Ask me how far along I am! Go on, fucking ask!”
That stopped him short, “you mean?”
“SIX MONTHS!” Standing there while he dropped to his knees was barely satisfying. “God I can’t stand you right now! You must’ve lost your damn mind and all your common sense!”
His silence was angering you further, stomping off to the kitchen for a drink of water and trying to calm down was a better use of your time; crying from this much stress wasn’t good for you.
Once he gathered himself he followed you, “Sweetheart… you’re telling me that night…”
“Finally used your brain, did you?”
“I’m so, god I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” His hand reached out to bring you in for a hug but you denied him.
“Do. Not. Touch me.” His audacity made you seethe. No way were you going to give in so easily no matter how much you desired to be in his embrace and reassured.
“Sweetheart—”
“You’re sleeping on the couch. We can decide what to do later.”
His emotions began to overflow, the guilt crushing him; the ring in his pocket practically burning into his flesh. “Decide what?”
“Decide if I should even let you stay.” Your throat felt tight but you continued to hold your sobs back. “Your dinner is in the oven by the way, it’s your favorite so I suggest you don’t let it burn.”
A few hours rolled around before he couldn’t hold himself back anymore hearing your sniffles. You hadn’t eaten dinner, who knows if you had any water, and no matter how (rightfully) mad you were, you still needed to eat.
Grabbing a few of your favorite snacks with a glass of juice instead of the untouched dinner he put in the fridge was his safest option, unsure if seeing the meal would upset you further.
“Pip squeak? I know you’re awake.” Crouching by your side of the bed and setting the snacks on the nightstand, “please talk to me?”
“Go away.”
“You know I can’t do that, you have to eat something.”
You poked your head from the blanket, “oh so you care now that you know it’s yours?”
The jab was deserved but it still earned a wince. “I’d still care even if they weren’t.”
“How noble of you. Sticking around to raise a kid that’s not yours before I even have a ring.”
“Who said I didn’t have a ring?” This time you accepted the comfort of his hand brushing your hair behind your ear and gently cupping your cheek.
Curiosity was a bitch, but you weren’t ready to forgive him yet. “You were really mean.”
“I know, I’m so sorry, sweetheart. So sorry. I can’t imagine you being with anyone else but I didn’t expect to come home to a family either— and I’m beyond happy to be a dad. It’s not an excuse though, never okay to talk to you like that.”
A few leftover sniffles came before he pulled a tissue from the box on your nightstand, opting to dry your tears himself. “Blow,” He said, holding the tissue to help you blow your nose; then offering you the straw of the juice so you could hydrate.
“I missed you so much, I thought you’d still be happy to see me.”
“I’m over the moon, actually. But I hurt my girl, gotta make things right. Think you can forgive me? I’ll earn it forever.”
“Caleb if you ever, I mean ever, speak to me like that again I won’t hesitate to let you talk to the front door. You’ll be out.”
“I’ll cut my tongue out myself.”
“So dramatic as always.” You rolled your eyes, “you mentioned a ring?”
A smile lifted the corner of his mouth, “there’s my girl. You sure you still want it? Or should I earn it first?” He dug into his pants pocket to show you anyway.
“It wouldn’t hurt your efforts.”
He couldn’t help but chuckle fully before presenting the velvet box to you, “I’m pretty close to the ground but if you sit up for me I’ll get on one knee.”
Sitting up to stretch was good for your back anyway, “I think I’ve waited long enough.”
The velvet box opened and your jaw dropped, “picked it out in Skyhaven. Gideon and I helped the elderly owner of a small shop with some boxes he was struggling with in front of his door. Knew it was perfect right away, gorgeous and one of a kind like you.”
“You’re ridiculous, but I love it.” He slid it on your finger and sealed it with a kiss, and you fell into his arms like you’ve wanted to for the last six months.
Pulling away after many minutes of hugs, ‘I love you’s’ and kisses wasn’t welcomed by you. “Now, how ‘bout some dinner? I don’t think snacks are enough, they were backup. Gotta keep you healthy.”
“Did you like it?”
You were pulled to your feet and carried out of the room. “Didn’t eat without you, sweetheart. Having dinner without you and the baby felt empty.”
“Good. You can reheat it then.” You waited for the perfect moment to drop your bombshell, which happened to be when he was carrying a full glass pitcher of water for the table. “We’re having a daughter, by the way.”
The pitcher fell so fast his evol barely managed to catch it before glass hit the ground. It left you feeling smug.
You couldn’t help but cackle at his shocked spluttering, “A WHAT?”
I’m so flattered, I’ve never had so many people interested or had a taglist this long: @pixelcafe-network @kentochronicles @sashisuslover @lunia-likes-pomegranet @elli4ever @mysssticc @kaemaybae @kamisatoaiko @midiplier @jamseashell @llamabois @boba14 @crimsonspring @angrychinchillanoises @ali-shiii @kazbae95 @ifistoptherain @c-I-stinnett @nephelesthoughts @etherealzi @jjoppees @keithkoganeirl
Click here to be added to the taglist for part 2
All divider credits to me @thecutestgrotto
#caleb x reader#lads caleb x you#caleb x mc#lads caleb#love and deepspace caleb#caleb smut#caleb fluff#lads x reader#lnds caleb#lads mc#love and deepspace#love and deepspace fic
912 notes
·
View notes
Text
Zero's Fic Binding - Sixpence In His Shoe
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/303bddb25b527e497a20ea4c954f067a/1e3861beed946f17-2f/s540x810/8efd0ba3144691d8448eb91df520dc747ef11753.jpg)
Sixpence In His Shoe by scifigrl47 [@scifigrl47]
Fandom: Marvel (Comics) Ship: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Start Date: 02/05/24 End Date: 01/21/25 Pages: 253
I am, honestly, probably the most proud of this cover. This might be the most detailed, delicate, intricate thing I’ve made - ever. I know I haven’t been doing this long, but this? This is really good.
The amount of layers in this bitch is astounding. Sometimes I yearn for the embrace of a better graphic software then Canva. We’ll get there. Anyway.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f6173915255abf80f0c7dc29e81caf97/1e3861beed946f17-8c/s540x810/68e9da6d2f326da0ac70bc4ad1ca11d64e4ebd5a.jpg)
There is an Owlcrate special edition of The Longest Autumn that inspired the shit out of me for this, along with the version of The Fine Print that i saw in Target that was this beautiful lined foil design. The idea of a mirrored, hyper intricate lace-like cover that wove all the individual parts of the story together drove me crazy.
The vinyl is foil - which, if you are new to HTV and want to use it to make book covers, LISTEN: This foil sucks. All foil HTV sucks. It’s going to suck to cut. It’s going to REALLY suck to iron on. It will be worth it, but it’s going to try and drag your soul out of your body by your fingernails the entire time you’re using it.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/804474abc79029b4e7931f89bcd2b538/1e3861beed946f17-19/s540x810/288a542537cabbd14eb71980e83ffc47076927b8.jpg)
Alright, lets talk about the process and the typeset.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f2ee7a1e7e2d263c56f8a297ed8b7a94/1e3861beed946f17-ef/s540x810/cd4d1df30f5c3fd33ea948410000e59781be05dc.jpg)
The entire theme of this fic is marriage - in both that the characters got married, are having a wedding, and are desperately in love with each other despite not actually telling each other that before said marriage and wedding. I initially was going to do a blue and white theme, more along the lines of really flowery modern wedding invitations - but then I read the fic again.
I forgot about the first chapter. Reading again, I paid more attention to what everyone around them was doing to celebrate marriage being legal. The process of it. The traditional feel of how it was done. And that’s the hook that I followed instead.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4a69b2a93153cc8cee3b94edfd5737f9/1e3861beed946f17-93/s640x960/9c771fe3679d94e48c416aaf435e896ab5aa5dbc.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0e5673072be8538e9cc6279af668896e/1e3861beed946f17-5f/s540x810/adb819e9cf31f7353fc2be22b3ee1958d71ed23e.jpg)
Sixpence doesn't have chapter names - so instead I pulled some of the wedding traditions that I researched and used those as my chapter foundations.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d1564d56ba9f46a2c8b0e8deff60670f/1e3861beed946f17-2b/s640x960/ff44f6cf688de203a254f5c43db7db64d49d4f3d.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e49a0837e450bcddb30aadd984e73a17/1e3861beed946f17-f6/s540x810/959b11e43e7e69d0b0c87830464412688b86e814.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/42d58794d19546056ddf584fd18fbd33/1e3861beed946f17-23/s540x810/a475f04d9ad893e04b01cdddd41ff7b2d5433256.jpg)
Each chapter gets one, where I use the motif as the header and the scene breaks in the chapter. I also added the iconography to the chapter numbers in the header.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/32ff8e0e2b9f7eb0874681b39fd5b23d/1e3861beed946f17-7c/s540x810/9c8ab1b9595402d51db530af9f91ef83be08577a.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e4528500a725918a1e645e9a402c3bc0/1e3861beed946f17-67/s540x810/4d4b3f291213918f58beb949cddb89294d9eef38.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/d4ef170692c877301447420ce51bc2dd/1e3861beed946f17-42/s540x810/cb69c1c95c7c2db5bb960a72eb86e2c6ec71e3df.jpg)
I made three of these in total. I fought this book every step of the way - I really needed to be a more experienced version of me to make this book the way I wanted to, but honestly? I literary did the best I could, and even I can tell that I did it.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9b4520db9a533cfd1864cfc26d3d550f/1e3861beed946f17-e7/s540x810/00dcaba9231943f360e0e215fde02a690caf2103.jpg)
The first copy of this book went to Sci - Its got a little extra character from being the first version, but out of the three sisters I made of this print run, she turned out the best looking. I'm keeping the most fucked up version (which is otherwise perfect, really, save for the fact that I put the FUCKING SPINE ON BACKWARDS), while the littlest sister is going to go to one of my best friends for a VERY belated gift.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/490c060caa981b74d30940091ba90954/1e3861beed946f17-b3/s540x810/346dab4e400413866c30b61b1001eaeba289f122.jpg)
This was a surprised gift for Sci - who had reached out to me almost 4 months ago and asked if they could maybe, possibly, have a copy of Maybe Tomorrow. I knew immediately that I wanted to make this for her too; I had the typeset in my Want To Make file since FEBRUARY OF 2024. So I dusted it off, dumped my other project to the side, and hyper focused on this book for about a month and a half.
Sci - I admire the fuck out of you. You are a gift and a treasure, and I hope you are ok with me getting my little racoon hands on your fics. Thank you for being open to my interpretation of your work. It’s a privilege and an honor to bind them.
If by some miracle, you have not had the pleasure of reading Sixpence In His Shoe - or any of Sci’s work, #1 what the fuck, #2 please start here.
#zeros fic binding#steve/tony#stony#stevetony#ficbinding#bookbinding#steve rogers/tony stark#mcu#2025 bind
177 notes
·
View notes
Note
congrats on your new milestone!! i really enjoy reading your work♡ could i please request mingyu+'we're in completely different leagues'+'i'm not sober enough to talk about this'
just the two of us — kim mingyu | 7,009 words | hurt/comfort, fluff
i typed up a mammoth sized story (to me, at least) because i had so many thoughts. behold my longest fic ever written, patiently beta-read by the wonderful @tomodachiii. thank you for your help, tomo! ily <3 and thank you, anon, for your request!
gender neutral reader. warnings: reader has massive self-doubt, gets drunk halfway through the story.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/39520fe01fcd4af1c0e6ee90c1338627/804633bc07e509a4-2d/s540x810/ba344ee7c2bee27713564f3315b9500c5da429af.jpg)
“the next time i even think of going on a date, just take my phone and force me to go out on a walk. reconnect with nature. touch some grass, maybe,” you say, kicking your feet against mingyu’s cupboard from where you’re sat on his counter.
“did you have a bad date i wasn’t aware of? was it the guy with the blue streaks?” mingyu asks, pushing the bowl of cake batter towards you. he never shies away from reminding you of the repercussions of having raw dough — that too in excruciating detail. salmonella. e. coli. things he could skip but doesn’t, just because he likes annoying you.
he lets it slide this time. you’re allowed just one big spoon, and the next time you’ll see the rest of it is when it’s baked and topped off with handmade frosting. courtesy of kim mingyu. your best friend as well as part-time chef.
“…no.”
“don’t lie to me,” he says, tilting his head. “you wouldn’t have brought it up otherwise.”
“ugh. it’s just that…every time i even think of going out on a date, i have to reset my expectations. because men can’t clear the bar, no matter how low it is.”
you take a nibble from the spoon, and it tastes so damn good. it’s crazy how mingyu manages to find time to make new recipes and perfect them despite being a world-famous model that’s modelled for almost every major fashion house. you’ve lost count of how many magazines he’s been on.
it started out as a joke when you complained about all the magazines for his first ever gig having sold out. he’d taken it upon himself to get you a very special, signed copy that you have on display with the rest of the books in your glass bookcase. just the one, though. the rest of them are all piled up under your coffee table, much to mingyu’s chagrin. at least they’re in chronological order. and you’re making sure they’re not collecting dust.
that first edition is pretty much the only thing mingyu ever teases you about, tattered as it is, and on display for whoever comes to visit you. but you’d never get rid of it, not even for a new copy. it’s a milestone mingyu deserves to be celebrated for.
“does it taste good?” he asks with a small smile and a nervous smile. as if you’d have anything except praises to heap on him. this isn’t even the first time you wonder if he’d talk like this to you if you were together — endless smiles and warm cuddles under the covers and conversations about the most random things and stolen hoodies because you’re actually dating, and not just you being a guilty friend whose imagination runs a bit wild sometimes.
he does all of those with you. but he just doesn’t like you the way you like him.
how would he be, when he’s the kim mingyu? he has his fans falling to their feet if he so much as posts a picture of his hand. he’s the most charming human being you know. he’s tall not just because of his genes but also because of all the love he holds for everyone he knows.
you’re another moon that gets to orbit in the path of the admirable planet that he is.
sometimes you don’t even know how you managed to remain friends with him after university ended. the two of you started off as being part of the same friend group, having a few shared classes and some interests that kept the two of you together apart from your friends. by the time you graduated, both of you knew enough about each other to be able to hang out without needing your mutual friends. and it was hardly your fault that you felt drawn to how warm mingyu was, how easy it was to talk to him, and how happy you felt just by being around him.
so when it came to the topic of finding a place to live, the two of you decided it would be better for you to be roommates than find a complete stranger to share a living space with, and you went from friends to best friends soon after that.
mingyu’s always been your support system for whatever you’ve wanted to do, encouraging you to do what you wanted, regardless of how it would turn out or what others would think of it. in the same way, it wasn’t anything when you encouraged him to try out a modelling gig he’d signed up for and was unsure of how he’d fare.
long story short, the shoot was a pretty good success, and soon enough he got multiple gigs, managed to earn enough money to move into a bigger house, and even offered to pay your part of the rent because he wanted you to live with him — something that made you smack him.
you no longer live together now, mainly because of mingyu’s insistence on not wanting to disturb your sleep and your daily routine with all the schedules that keep him flying over the world. you did miss the breakfast he’d make for the two you every morning, and you’d managed to work out a compromise where mingyu became your personal chef on saturdays just so he’d have some time to spend with you.
it’s far from the worst arrangement in the world, and moments like these — him putting icing on your nose — make you realize how lucky you are to have him. you generally watch movies together, or he teaches you recipes, or he listens to you talk about your life, reciprocating with his own stories. things haven’t changed that much, even though you don’t live together anymore.
but part of you wishes things did change. that mingyu would, just once, look at you the way you look at him. it’s a wonder he hasn’t once caught you staring at him, because you’ve done that more times than you can count. but you can’t help it, because he just so happens to be your whole world.
but how long is this utopia going to last for? when is he going to realize you’re just plain old you, and that maybe he’s suited for more glamorous company? people who can probably pronounce the names of all his fashion houses correctly, people he models with, people that can hang off his arm and look like they belong there? not people who like wearing shorts and an old shirt as pyjamas and have bouts of self-doubt strong enough to crush entire mountains?
“…is it that good? you zoned out a bit there,” mingyu says, snapping his fingers in front of your eyes.
you blink out of your daydreams. it’s not even his fault that you’re so head over heels for him, although it kind of is. no one asked him to be so good looking and polite and so damn lovely that it became easy to imagine a future with him. just like lee youngji can imagine having a future with hong jisoo because he opened a carton of milk for her, you wonder how you haven’t yet succumbed to those thoughts when mingyu is such a big part of your life. you wonder at what point you knew you were fucked.
maybe it was when you and mingyu became friends, although you’ll never know for sure.
“no.”
“are you sure?”
“your ego doesn’t need to get any bigger,” you quip, finishing off the rest of your spoon.
he just laughs. “good to know. let’s just wait for an hour till it finishes baking, okay?” he hands you a baking sheet to line the pan with. you work in silence as he fiddles with the knobs on the oven, ladling out the batter into the pan and sticking it inside once the oven’s warmed up enough.
“want to do something while it bakes? watch a movie?”
“i was thinking we could go for a walk,” mingyu says, taking off his apron. he looks ridiculous, a hulking six foot two man wearing an apron that’s comically small for him, but he takes kitchen etiquette very safely. he hangs it up on the hook behind the door. “the weather’s good, and i don’t think i’ve been out for a walk in a while.”
“what about all those texts you sent me about missing bobpul? i wonder what your fans would’ve thought of that.”
“you’re not supposed to bring that up,” he whines, and you can’t help the giggle that makes its way to your face. he’s a grown man. and he’s the most adorable one you know. “that was a moment of weakness.”
“and you trusted me with it.”
“because i trust you.”
“i…fine,” you sigh, because what can you really say to that? “it’s cute, that’s all.”
mingyu wiggles his eyebrows. “you think i’m cute?”
“i swear—”
“kidding!” he walks you out of the kitchen, hands on your shoulders, and you love it as much as you wish he didn’t do it. “we’ll be back within the hour. the cake should be ready by then.”
he hands you one of his hoodies that’s lying on the sofa before you head out. you look up at him when he presses the fabric into your hands.
“it’s cold,” he explains, but it’s muffled by the messy way he’s pulling his hoodie over his head.
“and i can deal with the cold just fine.”
“no, you’re going to stick your cold toes on my legs when we sit down to eat, and i’m not going to bear that. even if you’re my best friend.”
and no matter what excuse you make to avoid wearing mingyu’s clothes, it’s never enough. he has to see you bundled up to make sure you’re not going to freeze in front of him, although that’s a tad bit dramatic. this is one of his newer hoodies, and you can tell by the way it doesn’t smell like him just yet. maybe it’s a good thing. maybe you can stop thinking about him like that. one step at a time.
“some best friend you are,” you mumble, wearing your shoes. you look up and mingyu’s frowning at you. not the usual way; there’s a tiny frown that would’ve been imperceptible if you didn’t know him the way you do, but you’re not going to ask what’s up. he tells you things if they’re really bothering him, so you’re going to let him let you know in his own time.
he wasn’t wrong. it really is windy. you’re glad he made you wear the hoodie. you pull the sweater paws over your palms, loving the way your palms instantly become warm. mingyu flips the hood over your head and you’re about to thank him for it before he draws the strings together and ends up blacking out your vision. he finds it funny for about two seconds till you stumble blindly and end up jostling him in the stomach.
he's still wincing when you undo the strings, and you can’t help but laugh. “sorry, gyu.”
“are you, though?”
“…no.”
“thought so.”
“was it my fault?”
“no,” he says, and smiles, and you feel your heart flutter again. “not your fault.” it’s so pretty. even his smile’s so pretty. you love his canines, his little fangs that he feels weird about sometimes. if it were up to you, you’d do anything to make him love them just as much as you did, even if that something were kissing.
whoa. not again. not when he’s with you.
“so, about failed dates,” he says, looking at you. “are you actually looking for something, or do you just…go on them to pass your time?”
mingyu does this thing where he can read you to filth without even trying. it’s like he knows what’s running in your mind, or at least has the vaguest idea of it, and he says things that are basically truths you don’t want to admit to yourself out of fear of not knowing what to do about them.
“why does it matter?” you ask, a bit defensive.
he frowns. again, that little frown. you wish you could remove it. “because there’s so many other things you could be doing to spend time instead of creeping yourself out every time you go on a date. and you don’t need to keep getting yourself hurt like that if it isn’t leading to anything.”
“are you dating someone?”
mingyu pffts. “what, i can’t have advice for you without being in a relationship?”
“no,” you say immediately, backtracking. of course he can. “sorry. i know you didn’t mean anything by it, but…”
“but?”
“i just wish i—”
you’re cut off by the sudden bark of a dog. you look around to find the source of the sound only to see a dog running around in circles with its leash in its mouth. it looks adorable.
“hey, buddy,” you say, crouching down in front of it. it looks up at you and barks. a happy little yip! before it continues running along in circles.
“are you lost?” mingyu asks softly, crouching down next to you. he reaches out a hand to pet its head, and the puppy leans into his touch completely. it looks familiar for some reason.
“do you have any idea whose dog this is?” mingyu asks. you shake your head. maybe you’ve seen a dog like this, not the dog itself, but you’re really not sure. he’s in the process of searching the dog’s collar, but someone yelling in the distance makes him pause. he gets up and tugs the dog by its collar. it has the name tag jamie inscribed on it.
the person yelling out for jamie is none other than one of your neighbours. you know her well. as well as you can for someone you don’t interact much with. not if you can help it.
she’s the kind of neighbour that always pokes her nose into matters that don’t bother her, the neighbour that outright shows she’s not interested in something if it doesn’t get her anything. the two times you tried to initiate a conversation with her as you waited for the elevator to reach your floor are a stark reminder of the fact that she’s not the kind of person you’d ever be friends with. you don’t know what you’ve done to rub her the wrong way, but she doesn’t look like she’ll even give you a chance.
you watch as mingyu hands over the dog to her, and once she’s done making sure jamie’s okay, she looks him up and down.
you don’t blame her. you’d do the same, a bit more subtly, but it does sting to see the way she’s probably the kind of person he should be hanging out with.
“thanks for finding jamie,” she says, all smiles. she really doesn’t need to be smiling that much.
“no worries,” mingyu says with a smile of his own. “and it wasn’t me who found jamie, by the way. it was them.” he points to you with a jerk of his thumb. you smile at her, but feel icy inside when she looks you up ad down.
“oh. are they your…” she trails off with a smile on her face that screams no fucking way. you suddenly wish you could just run back to your apartment and leave the two of them down here.
“partner? you think so?”
“just…you two look like opposites, that’s all. sometimes opposites don’t attract, but you never know. life’s funny sometimes.” she simpers a little, and your hands ball up into fists by your side.
what you don’t expect is for mingyu to throw his arm around your shoulders, pulling you into himself. “yes, actually,” he says, leaning into you in a way that most definitely exaggerates your height difference. “you could call them my better half. and don’t they look good in this hoodie? it’s mine, by the way,” he says, and you can recognize the smile on his face — it’s a fake one, the corporate one he adopts when he’s in a situation he doesn’t like.
his words keep buzzing in your mind as you walk past your neighbour and back upstairs to your apartment. he’d said you were a couple so easily, even though you were not. better half? really? the way he’d leaned into you so easily, the fact that he told her it was his hoodie. it’s…weird. and too much for you.
you don’t speak much as you help mingyu remove the cake from the oven, getting it ready for frosting. he manages to get an indignant sound when he manages to get some on your cheek this time, but the rest of the evening is spent thinking about the interaction you had.
is it really so unbelievable for people to imagine the two of you together?
“hey,” he says, bumping your side with his. except he miscalculates his strength (or does it on purpose) and ends up making you stumble a few steps away from him. you don’t even have it in you to be mad when you see the giggle on his face. “you good?”
“yes. sorry,” you say, opening the refrigerator to take out the food mingyu had made last night. he cooks enough to feed a family of four even though you’re the only one that lives at your place, so it’s useful for when you don’t feel like cooking.
“who was she?” mingyu asks, setting down the plates on the table. “a friend?”
you shudder at the thought of her being your friend. “a neighbour. she lives in the flat down mine. she’s not really the kind of person i’d be friends with, but jamie’s cute. i keep seeing him around sometimes.”
“hmm.” you get the smell of reheated noodles as mingyu works at the stove. “she was…weird.”
“that’s an understatement.”
“is she always like that?”
“rude?”
“yeah. that’s not something you’d say to a couple you see, even if you don’t like them.”
“she certainly doesn’t seem to care,” you say, a bit more forceful than necessary, setting down two glasses as well.
“well, i think we’d make a cute couple,” mingyu says, a little smile on his face as he reaches out to ruffle your hair.
you swear your heart dies a little right then and there. you stare at him unblinkingly. “do you ever hear the stuff that comes out of your mouth?” you ask, regaining your bearings and filling the glasses with water.
“sorry,” mingyu says, sheepishly. “i just don’t like the idea of anyone talking like that. especially with you. especially when you’ve done nothing to deserve it.”
your heart warms at that. “thank you, gyu,” you say, reaching out to squeeze his arm. bad idea. you’d forgotten how much he’s been working out recently, and how big he is. “i’m glad i could one-up her this time.”
“just call me the next time you want to do it again.”
“yeah, sure.”
the rest of the night is spent watching this show that’s been on your watchlist for a while, and you don’t mind if mingyu conks out in the middle of it.
sure enough, you hear his soft snores after you finish your dessert, and you turn to see this big man that’s also your best friend craning his neck on the sofa as he tries to keep himself in the blanket that’s certainly not big enough for the two of you.
sometimes you wonder if he’d cuddle with you to save space and keep himself warm, and this also happens to be one of those times. You get up and reposition him as gently as you can, so that his back doesn’t hurt in the morning. His nose twitches when you rest a hand on his hair, wishing him a silent goodnight.
It's not the first time you wish you could kiss him, dangerous as that thought is.
you can’t stop thinking about the interaction you had a few days ago. sure, your neighbour isn’t someone whose behaviour you’d count on to matter, but was she right when she said she can’t see two people like you together? people as opposite to each other as you and mingyu?
sure, you’re not the usual kind of crowd he hangs out with, but is it so bad to imagine something between the two of you? was that just the sign to stop thinking about mingyu, get over him and resign yourself to a life without love?
as much as you complain about going on dates, there’s something that’s your fault too — you look for mingyu everywhere. none of the men you’ve gone on dates with are mingyu, and that’s the crux of the problem. none of them smile the way he does, none of them give you their jacket when you’re feeling cold, and it’s unfair for you to expect them to understand everything about you.
you can’t have mingyu, and you’re going to have to learn to accept that.
Which is why you’re at this party with your friend seungkwan. it’s not your usual scene — you’d much rather be curled up in bed with a book and some takeout, or cleaning your bookshelf while listening to music on the television — but you’re not complaining. seungkwan was right. you need to let go once in a while, just enjoy yourself before you inevitably spend weeks together keeping to yourself, immersed in your work.
“dance with me!” seungkwan yells out to you over the din of the crowd.
“i can’t dance! not like you!”
“that hardly matters! let’s have some fun, come on!”
seungkwan is nothing if not persistent. finishing off the last of the drink, you let him lead you out onto the dance floor. he rests his hands on your shoulders as he sways you to the music. it’s fast paced and something you’d be caught doing in the privacy of your own house, your own little concert, and for once you don’t care about the fact that people can see you. you’re lost in your own little world with seungkwan, and more importantly, you’re happy. the stress of whatever the fuck happened last week between you and mingyu, with him calling himself your boyfriend without knowing how down bad you are for him, is pushed to the back of your mind as the beat changes. seungkwan starts clapping to the rhythm, making you realize you’re dancing by yourself.
you’re not half bad at this. a little under confident, sure, but not bad. you could try making this a monthly thing and having fun with it.
eventually you end up too exhausted to dance to another song, and seungkwan guides you to a seat, your shoes in his hand as he asks you to catch your breath and wait for a while more till he finishes dancing with some other people.
you’ve ordered a basic drink for yourself when someone slides in next to you. you don’t pay them much attention, focusing on relaxing a bit and finishing your drink, but you have to turn around and look at them when you can actually feel their eyes piercing into your side and— boy, is he a sight for sore eyes.
he looks boyishly handsome, completely in place in this club as he watches you with his chin resting in his hand, eyes glinting in the light of the fixture above the two of you. he’s pretty, and just as handsome, and his eyes are the loveliest shade of brown you’ve ever seen.
“saw you dancing out there,” he says, his words a bit of a drawl, and accented. “you were pretty good.”
“you don’t need to lie if you’re trying to flirt,” you jest, finishing your drink.
“i’m not in the habit of lying,” he says, smiling at you. “you looked like you were having fun.”
“i…was, actually,” you say. he’s still smiling, looking at you like he’s searching for something in your eyes. you feel warm. gosh.
“can i get you another drink?”
“no, thank you, actually. i need my head to remain intact if i want to get home in one piece.”
“suit yourself,” he nods, and asks the bartender for the same drink you had. the bar is in hell, but you’re impressed he backed off immediately. you watch as he makes quick work of his drink.
“so, you come here often?” he asks, wiping the back of his mouth.
“not really. my friend dragged me out tonight because he felt i needed a break from my life.”
“just a friend?” he asks, eyes following your line of vision to see seungkwan still dancing with some strangers, looking like he’s having fun.
“why, you interested?”
“depends on who you’re talking about.”
“him?”
“cute, but no.”
“me.”
“maybe.”
you trace the ring of condensation your drink’s left on the table. “but i’m not looking for anything, honestly. i’ve sworn off dating for a while.”
“that’s fine. we could just…talk.”
you look up at the man. you don’t know if this is his way of trying to get you to go home with him, but it’s the most genuine someone’s been. “you never told me your name, by the way.”
“me? vernon. nice to meet you.”
you give him your name in return, and like the way it rolls off his tongue.
“so…can i ask why you’ve sworn off dating?”
seungkwan’s still going to take a while, going by the previous times you’ve been here, and vernon definitely seems interested in talking to you.
“you ever…had a crush on your best friend?”
vernon winces — an actual wince, like he’s seen something terrible, and it makes you laugh. “yeah…once. it sucks.”
“exactly.”
“you’re trying to get over them?”
“trying being the keyword, yes.”
“then how are you trying to get over them if you’re not into dating?”
you sigh. vernon’s a perceptive one. “trying to think of other people even if i don’t necessarily go home with them. just anything to get my mind off him.”
“anything? how bored would you be if i started talking about why i think star wars is excessive but also misunderstood?”
you don’t find vernon boring, in fact. you find yourself drawn to him speaking, the way his eyes light up and his hands get a life of their own as he lists out every single point in aid of his stance, and encourages you to contribute to the conversation. it feels like he’s an old friend, and not someone you met hardly an hour ago. it’s fun.
“…so maybe we could go out to watch that movie? it’s coming out next week.”
“go out?”
“as friends, of course. i’m not looking to take someone home, either. if anything, i came here to keep my friends company, but…i think i lost them in the crowd.”
you look around, and seungkwan’s sitting at a table surrounded by a bunch of girls, and it makes you grin. he doesn’t need you sticking with him anymore.
“you were saying?”
“does next week work—”
“it doesn’t,” says a new voice. a familiar voice. there’s two hands on your shoulders, a familiar weight. “we’re hanging out at my place next week.”
“mingyu!” you exclaim, pulling him out from behind you. “don’t scare me like that.”
“sorry,” he says, not sounding the least bit sorry. “you have no idea how much time i spent searching for you only to find you hidden here.”
“why were you looking for me? how did you know i was here?”
he looks at you like you asked him something stupid. “because it’s late, and because seungkwan’s most definitely not driving you home.” ah. seungkwan must have asked mingyu to pick you up, given that he was your ride here.
“well,” you say, directing him towards your conversational partner. “this is vernon. my new friend.”
“hi,” he says, curt, and you frown. mingyu’s generally nicer.
“hey,” vernon says coolly. then he turns back to you. “can you give me your number? i’ll text you about it later, when you’re free. think i’ll search for them now.”
you hand vernon your own phone, given he’s had less drinks than you have, and it hardly takes a minute for him to enter his details before he saves his number and claps your shoulder, wishing you and mingyu a good night.
you find mingyu watching vernon making his way through the crowd. “so, who was that?”
“new friend. vernon. like i said.”
“a new friend? seriously? he just asked for your number.”
“so? he wasn’t hitting on me or anything. he just asked me so we could go see this movie we’ve been wanting to watch.”
mingyu’s eyebrows rise. “a movie? together? doesn’t that sound like…a date?”
you frown. “two friends can go watch movies, mingyu. don’t we do that all the time?”
“Yeah, but that’s because you know me. he’s just some random guy you met today. at a club.”
either mingyu’s being obtuse, or you’re not thinking correctly. “are you saying i don’t know how to read people’s intentions?”
“you’re drunk,” he says bluntly, taking off his jacket and wrapping it around your shoulders. “you don’t know what he wants.”
something about his tone makes you angry. he wasn’t even here the whole evening. “as if you do. you didn’t speak to him at all, mingyu. you don’t even know what we talked about.”
“didn’t you say you wanted to stop going out on dates?”
the coldness in his voice makes you freeze. you’ve never heard him sound so hostile, not with you. “what do you mean?”
“why did i have to find out from seungkwan that you were out here at this club just a week after you asked me to make you touch grass if you so much as thought of a date?”
“but it wasn’t a date!” you exclaim, feeling more and more annoyed. to your horror, you feel tears stinging the corners of your eyes. “are you saying i’m—”
“you’re drunk. you don’t know what you want. did you seriously expect to make friends at the club of all places?”
this isn’t your mingyu. he’d never judge you the way he’s doing right now. you take his jacket and throw it on the counter, turning around and marching out. you’ll call a cab to take you to your place. you don’t need him dropping you home.
“hey,” mingyu calls out, jogging towards you, jacket in his hand. “it’s cold. take this, please?”
“i don’t care about what you have to say,” you sniff, wrapping your hands around yourself. “don’t talk to me.”
“listen, you can be angry with me all you want, but just take my jacket. i don’t want you freezing out here when you don’t need to be.”
“maybe you should’ve thought of that before saying all that shit to me,” you spit. “why do you want to talk to me now? just insult me some more, why don’t you?”
mingyu huffs, but says nothing. he just looks at you.
“come with me.”
“where?”
“to my car.”
“why should i?”
“i won’t leave you here by yourself. i want to make sure you’re safe. let me drop you home and you can be mad at me all you want. please.”
“what, your night’s going to be a waste unless i come with you?”
“no,” he says quietly, and it makes you pause. mingyu is anything but quiet. “It’s never a waste. but it’ll just put my mind at ease if i know you’re safe, okay?”
you see the logic in his words, but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. “fine,” you say, taking his jacket from him and slipping it on.
“thank you,” he says, opening the passenger door for you.
the drive to your place is quiet. you can tell mingyu wants to say something, start a conversation, but you keep your eyes resolutely fixed ahead.
“come on,” he says, unbuckling his seat belt and getting out when you reach your building. you follow him upstairs to your apartment. he unlocks the door for you and makes way for you to step inside first.
“do you need water? food? anything i can get?” he asks, taking off his shoes.
you turn around to look at him. he’s big, as always, but for once it feels like he’s taking up all the space in your apartment.
“i’m not that drunk,” you say finally.
he stands up straight to look at you. “but—”
“yes, i had some drinks, but i know my limit. i had my last one just before i started talking to vernon. i hate that you thought i wasn’t capable of making my own decisions.”
he swallows. “i didn’t mean to undermine—”
“but you did! and you don’t know how terrible it feels. i’m not a baby, gyu. i know what i want and what i’m doing. i’m hurt. and,” you say, taking in a deep breath, “if you really want to know something, know this — we’re in completely different leagues.”
mingyu frowns. “what do you mean?”
“i—” there’s so much you mean. you can’t possibly recount all the thoughts you’ve had about feeling inadequate, all the nights you’ve spent wondering how long it’ll be before he realizes you’re not as cool as you should be. “i’m not sober enough to talk about this.”
“you just said you weren’t that drunk.”
“this is my home,” you say, a bit harsher than needed. “you got me here safe, and that’s all you wanted to do. this is me being mad at you, so if you respect me, you’re going to let me sleep. okay? goodnight, mingyu.”
“goodnight,” he says, and you hate how small his voice sounds. “sleep well.”
and you do sleep well. well enough that you sleep through your alarm, and wake up almost when it’s ten. at least it’s a saturday, so you’re not freaking out as you brush your teeth. you have some work to do today. and hanging out with mingyu is on the agenda as well, but you’re not sure if you’re keen on going through with it, especially after what happened last night.
if you were delusional, which you’re most definitely not, you’d say that mingyu had been jealous that you and vernon had exchanged numbers in front of him. except there’s no reason for him to be jealous. like he reminded you, you’re not looking for any relationships. there’s no one he has to compete with, so to speak.
so why was he that upset last night? and what about the things he’d said to you?
you’ve had fights before, fights that ended up with both of you not wanting to speak to each other, but this was different. he’d never been angry like this.
you’re the one who’s upset, you realize, as you walk to the kitchen to fix yourself some breakfast. you’re going to talk it out with mingyu once your head is clearer, and you’re going to see what he has to say for himself.
except mingyu’s already here. you can smell the delicious scent of tteokbokki wafting through the room. mingyu’s set out two plates, two glasses — the usual. you’re feeling woefully under dressed in front of him in your pyjamas, despite the fact that he’s seen you like this multiple times before.
“morning,” he says. his voice is hesitant. It’s never hesitant.
“hi. morning.”
“slept well?”
“yeah, better than…what exactly are you doing here?”
“cooking you breakfast,” he says, waving his spatula around.
“i can see that. i meant here. in my place. didn’t you go back home after dropping me off?”
“no. i felt too tired to drive back home, so i decided to crash out on your couch. and i’m making you breakfast now. isn’t that a win-win?”
you can see one win, but you’re not sure what the other is. you take a seat at the table and pour yourself a glass of water, wearily trying to assess the situation. mingyu had pretty much scolded you last night. like a parent who didn’t trust you to make the right choices despite having free will. and now he’s cooking you breakfast like last night just didn’t happen.
“can i ask you something?” mingyu says, pushing a plate of tteokbokki towards you along with a pair of chopsticks.
“don’t think i can stop you, can i?”
mingyu huffs. “hey. if you’re upset with me, just say no.”
“what is it?”
“what did you mean by yourself being out of my league?”
you set your chopsticks down. “you’re serious? you’re really asking me that?”
he frowns. “yes.”
“mingyu, you called yourself my boyfriend a week back. your…better half.”
“that was to make your neighbour leave. she was being weird.”
“sure. and then we went back to life like nothing had even happened.”
“because…it hadn’t? i thought we talked it out that night itself? what happened now?”
“i don’t think you understand how that made me feel. especially when you said—” you say, voice trembling. “you called yourself my boyfriend last week. like it’s something you throw around naturally. and last night you acted all…weird, as if i wasn’t allowed to have a normal conversation with someone who wasn’t you. why are you so confusing?”
“would you hear me out if i said i had a reason?”
“you’d better have a damn good reason.”
mingyu sets down his glass and looks at you. “i’m sorry for everything i said yesterday. i truly am. i didn’t mean any of it. i was just…jealous.”
that catches your attention. “jealous? of?”
“that guy. vernon. you seemed like you were having a good time talking to him and i thought about how if you got together you’d probably leave our relationship behind because you liked him so much.”
“whoa. slow down. i told you i wasn’t looking—”
“you weren’t. i know that. but the way you looked at him made me feel something.”
“what?”
“i’m saying…” mingyu takes in a deep breath, and focuses on something past your shoulder. not meeting your eyes. “i’m saying i like you.”
you blink. “i’m sorry?”
“i like you, and i was jealous because you seemed to be having so much fun talking to him. if you have to know, there’s no guy who possibly deserves you. i’m not saying i do, either, but i’ll try my best to be the guy you deserve.”
it’s still too early in the day for this. “stop joking, mingyu. i don’t want to go through it again. just—”
“i’m not!” he exclaims, coming over to your side of the table. “thinking i could be with anyone i wanted is a bold thing to say. how do you think i feel every time i go out for company dinners but all i want to do is spend time with you? have you as my plus one every time?”
your heart’s fluttering very fast. you feel almost breathless. “i wouldn’t even look that good by your side.”
“says you. have you ever seen yourself?”
“i have, actually, and i look—”
“so gorgeous,” mingyu cuts you off, eyes twinkling as he says so. as though he’d been holding onto it for so long and finally found the right time to release it. “you look exactly like the person i want to spend every single day of my life with.”
you almost expect cameras to pop up out of nowhere and film your reaction to what he’s just said. “the…rest of your life? you do know that’s…a long time, right?”
“i do. and i’ve already spent four years with you. eight, if you’re counting the time before we became best friends.”
it’s everything you’ve ever wanted to hear. what he’s offering is so close to you, just an arm’s length away, but you can’t convince yourself to reach out for it. you hide your face in your hands. “gyu…”
“i’m serious,” he says, gently peeling your hands from your face. his hands are so warm as he holds yours, and his boba eyes are so close to yours. he’s adorable. “give me one chance?”
“what if we…mess this up? what if you realize i’m not that fun to hang out with every single day?”
“what if you realize everything you're thinking is wrong? what if you realize there’s no way i’m going to let things go wrong, especially when it comes to you?”
you don’t know what to say. you don’t know what the future holds in store, and you have no answers to your questions just like you don’t have answers to his.
“i know you think…not so greatly of yourself sometimes,” mingyu says, squeezing your hands. “and i want to be here to tell you that everything you think in that regard is wrong. i like you because you’re you. why do you think you’re the only one who’s been my best friend for so long? you’re the only one i can be myself around completely. tell me you know that.”
“i…didn’t know that.”
“then i clearly didn’t do a very good job at being your best friend. maybe i can fix that now.”
now. now that mingyu likes you. now that you have the chance to see your relationship blossom into something more.
“you’re not even going to ask me if i like you?”
a slow blush spreads across mingyu’s face. “shit, sorry. um, do you…like me?”
“of course i like you, gyu,” you smile, feeling giddy at the way he gets redder.
“good. can i, um, be your boyfriend, then? would you like that?”
“you’re not taking me out on a date first?”
mingyu’s eyes shine and he leans in till his nose is inches away from yours. “hi,” he whispers, and you actually whimper when his lips brush yours the slightest bit. embarrassing. mingyu doesn’t seem to mind, though.
“g-good morning, gyu.”
“the best, actually. even better if you let me take you out on a date today.”
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/39520fe01fcd4af1c0e6ee90c1338627/804633bc07e509a4-2d/s540x810/ba344ee7c2bee27713564f3315b9500c5da429af.jpg)
taglist: @bookyeom @wootify @strnsvt @cloudycaramel @thepoopdokyeomtouched
@minnieminshi @nonononranghaee @hrts4hanniehae @viewvuu @bewoyewo
#mingyuuuu i love youuuu#seventeen#seventeen fluff#fluff#mingyu#friends to lovers#svt#waldau writes#req
313 notes
·
View notes
Text
It crazy how it’ll cut to a particular shot and I immediately know what iconic line is coming up or remembered how a thousand artists redrew this particular scene. It crazy how involved in this fandom I was lmao.
Oh my god I started rambling in the tags and I maxed out limit of tags. I guess in higher than I thought
I can’t believe I forgot about the hot lesbian squad in season 3 of Voltron
#2015-2018 was probably when I was most involved in fandom#you could maybe stretch it to 2014-2019#but now there’s just so much media that comes out and everything all drops at once#it doesn’t feel like you can ride a particular wave of everyone on a section of tumblr all get into the same thing at the same time#or all picking the same show of the season#like how Hamilton fandom became the heathers fandom became the dear Evan Hansen fandom which became the be more chill fandom#also how lots of yuri on ice fans became killing stalking fans and if im remembering correctly some others became Voltron fans#or maybe that was just me and my friends#or remember when people would edit a bunch of symbols from books and tv shows together into one big symbol#stuff like superwholock even#this isn’t an original thought but I’m just get nostalgic for a time where fandom felt different to me#there probably still are trends out there I just don’t keep up with them#I’ve been watching older stuff#also I had to be soley obsessed with fmab for like 2 years#I think that’s the fandom I’ve read the most fanfiction for#although maybe for deh I’ve read the most fics#but I’ve read the most words for fmab#the single longest fic I’ve read was for a fmab hp cross over#it’s was over 600.000 words#I read it in a blur#i am actually not even sure if it was the cross over fic that was 650k if I think about it#I know I read one that was super fucking long#but it might of been the the bnha one that was that long#I read them close together and I remember them being long and some general details but it’s a blur#when I read too many similar fanfic I get them all blurred together#but my anxiety and obsession wants the comfort of my favorite tropes and characters#but my adhd needs the slight variation of it being differently written#and don’t tell me you’re not all the same#although maybe not maybe I’m the weirdo for reading through every fic of a particular tag#and I’m not even talking about a ship tag although I’ve down that for small fandom rare pairs
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Crimes of a Mother
Batfamily x Latina! Reader
—•—
Author´s note: Hello! Hope all of you are okay! Welcome to my new...whatever this is! (I have no idea if this will be a series or just a one shot...If it does become a series, it will definitely be a short one unlike the others) This is not in ANY of the universes of my other fics. Hope you enjoy!
Warning: None
General Masterlist:
Masterlist:
—•—
City lights. A scream. A dark looming shadow. A manor. Gun shots. It was the same dream every night. A city dark as night and curious as a cat.
Unraveling the never-ending mysteries that Gotham had to offer was one of my fascinations in life. For the longest time, I had held a certain obsession with the city. It always felt as if something was out there...calling me towards the magnificently mysterious place. Mom always tried to discourage it and would say that the city held secrets that would be unwise to uncover. It was a recuring argument in my household and it got worse the moment I told her I was striving to enroll on Gotham University.
SMACK
I snap out of my daydream.
-You know...normally, I don´t mind when you space out, Yn, but if we expect to make it out of here and straight to GU, we seriously NEED to study.
Taylor, my best friend ever since childhood, dropped a book on my desk, and looked at me impatiently. Charles, snorted from his place in my desk chair, watching the entire ordeal amusedly.
-You know it's bad when Tay is the one that wants to study and not you, Y.
-You know, you don't have to follow me all the way to Gotham. Brings out your attachment issues.
-First of all, you bitch, OF COURSE we have to go there. We are the iconic trio of Robinson Academy; we can't be separated. And second, Yn Salazar, you are forbidden of going into this mystery solving quest without your trusty sidekicks. How else is the documentary of your life supposed to be entertaining if you don't have the two dazzling, gay, and hilarious side characters who everyone will make edits of. Duh!
Said Taylor, throwing herself on my bed.
-It is the last Spanish test! Vamos a estar bien, chica! Mr. Soto will probably give out like a short quiz for us to be done with Senior year. Besides, we are ALREADY in! Forgot that piece of information?
Taylor opened her mouth and just shrugged, making Charlie and I laugh.
-Fair.
-Now, let's finish setting up and get started.
We move efficiently, setting up the camera on its tripod and strapping each tiny microphone to ourselves. We get settled on my bed and hit record.
•[Recording]
-Hi! My name is Yn Salazar. Born and raised in Puerto Rico. Currently, it is May 2nd, a week before my last day of high school and three weeks before my graduation. These are my best friends, Charles Martinez and Taylor Perez. Following today, we will be headed for Gotham University. Why Gotham precisely? Well, Gotham is a city full of mischief, madness, and chaos; and I plan to uncover it. From cryptic, to vigilantes, to rouges, this will be only the first of many time capsules. Beware Gotham, I'm coming.
—•—
A FEW MONTHS LATER
Unlike most college students, Charlie, Taylor and I had decided to not go on the dorms and find a three-bedroom apartment close to campus. Seeing as the three of us came from families that were economically well and rent was unsurprisingly cheap in Gotham, we had finally settled last week. Our apartment was fully furnished and decorated, and we still had a few weeks before classes began in September. I had just ended a call with my mom and headed for the living room, where Charlie was seated rewatching House of the Dragon. Taylor was in the kitchen trying out a new recipe she found on Pinterest.
-Ugh!
I say as I throw myself on the couch dramatically
-Your mom still thinks it is a bad idea to come to Gotham?
Taylor screamed from the kitchen.
-YES! I will never get it! What is in here that puts that woman in such a bad mood? All my life, my one dream has been to come to Gotham, I mean this is where every criminal journalist thrives! She is always so paranoid of this city and telling me that the secrets I would find here should stay hidden and for me to give it a rest. I think it is because my father lives here and if he does, who is he? Every time I ask, I get the same speech of powerful men and their ways...My mom has good judgement! I don't think she would have been with just anyone. For fuck's sake, she is one of the smartest and highest paid psychologists in Puerto Rico. I need to find out what this city is hiding...what happened to mom when she lived here.
-More like who happened probably
Muttered Charlie.
-EXACTLY! It is even worst that she sent me here with this letter to give to a Mr. Bruce Wayne.
-The Billionaire? (T)
-I guess...maybe I can interrogate him and see if that gets me a lead on this entire thing.
-When are you going? (C)
-After we drop you at soccer practice and T at rehearsal.
-FUCK I THINK I BURNT IT!!!
-TAYLOR!!!!
Charles and I got to her rescue laughing.
-Looks like we will be having takeout tonight
She said with a laugh
----
-That is one creepy ass manor...
I mutter from my driver seat. I press the button on the intercom near the gate. It buzzes and a voice with a distinct English accent speaks up,
-Good evening, with what may I help you today?
-Yeah...uh...hi! My name's Yn Salazar. I came to deliver a letter for Mr. Wayne...it's from Valentina Salazar.
-Oh dear...I'll let you pass straight away.
I hear the gate buzz and open. I drive in and park my car just outside. We had all pitched in and bought a car because we knew Gotham was not the best of places to walk around during the night. So, this is more convenient.
I take a deep breath and grab my bag, making sure my notepad is there, with my phone and wallet. I double check that the letter is there and once I see it, I get out of the car and lock it. I walk towards the entrance and just before I go to open the door, a man dressed like a butler opens it.
-You must be young Miss Salazar.
-Yn's just fine, and yeah that's me
The man takes a second to look at me, slight shock in his features. I observe him from head to toe and try to give him a smile. Top ten weirdest encounters ever. He moves aside and gestures for me to enter.
-Right this way, miss, Master Bruce is in his study expecting you.
I inspect everything around me as I follow the man. As we walk past one of the doors, I hear a bunch of screaming and I peak inside. Five guys, all varying in sizes and two girls, one blonde and another with raven hair are seen playing Mario Kart. I stay for second when one of them catches my eye and we make eye contact. He furrows his brow and I panic and leave, catching up to the butler.
We finally reach the study, and he knocks. A faint “Come in” is heard and I'm led inside.
-Young Miss Salazar
The butler announces and takes his leave. The man, Bruce Wayne takes one look at me and goes rigid. We stay a few seconds just looking at each other. His eyes show shock and disbelief. Mine I can guess show curiosity and uncertainty.
-This is for you!
I cringe at how awkward I sound. Great job, Yn, he already fucking knows that. He coughs and nods as I walk towards him and hand him the letter. I take a seat and wait patiently for him to open it and read it. I play with my fingers as silence engulfs us.
-You are Valentina's kid?
-That is corrrect
-How old are you?
-I turned 18 back in February.
-I see...
His face pales at the revelation and he continues reading. I didn't think it was possible for this man to get any paler, yet he does once he is done reading the letter.
-How did you know my mom?
I went directly to the point
-We were close friends
-How close? She never once mentioned this supposed friendship
He flinches at that statement,
-Valentina is a woman of many secrets
-On that we can agree, how close?
He observes me for a moment, and I harden my gaze on him. The corner of his tilts up slightly, clearly amused by me.
-Close
-How informative of you. Did you attend Gotham Academy together?
-Yes.
-Hmmm, have you any clue on why she left Gotham?
-I don't think it is my position to give that information
-How noble, have you any memory of who were her friends aside from you, of course?
-I may. Yn, is it?
-Yes.
-I suggest you follow your mother's advice and keep away from this. Your mother is a good woman and anything from the past should be placed at rest. Some skeletons are meant to stay in the closet.
-Did you know who was my father?
I push one last time and I see him take a sharp intake of air.
-Ah...so you do, wonderful.
-Yn...
-Thank you for your time today, Mr. Wayne. I can assure you this won't be the last time you will see me. Here's my mother's number. You can call her and tell her yourself that her plan to shoo me away from my investigation has been unsuccessful and that getting her “close friend” to deter me from it as well will do nothing. Good day.
I stand up to leave and Mr. Wayne just observes me as I take my leave. Alfred, who I just learnt his name, leads me back to the door. We pass by the kitchen where the group I saw earlier are gathered muttering. They see me and quiet down, just observing me. I raise my eyebrow at them. I hear a low “He got another one?” as I continue on my way. Finally, we get to the door, and I thank Alfred for him time. I get on my car and look up, seeing Mr. Wayne watching me from one of the windows and the group of people trying to be discreet from another window. “This won't be the last time they see me for sure”, I think to myself as I connect my phone to the car and play Running Up That Hill by Kate bush as I drive away.
—•—
Back in Bruce's study, Alfred interrupts his train of thought as he watches the car leave.
-Is that who I am to believe it is?
-And who might you think that is, Alfred?
-Don't play coy with me boy, I can detect a Wayne from a mile away. That girl is yours.
Alfred replied courtly. Bruce walks back and hands him the letter. His eyebrows raise high on his head as he reads.
-I have never met anyone with Wayne blood that was not troublesome, and it seems, this one will keep you with your hands full for some time.
-What gave her away?
-Her eyes, master Bruce. That scrutinizing and calculative gaze is one that can only be found in anyone related to you, blood or not. You have another young detective in your hands, and this one just as brilliant.
-That is what worries all of us.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/86db193fb5213eeb4554779a3d8eacf5/a477aeddd27b10b6-f4/s640x960/5a7ebc423d6b8ef10de10248d475f588109c11a1.jpg)
-•-
Tell me what do you guys think about this draft? Should it be a fic? Are y'all interested? Should there be a taglist? Leave me a comment or a reblog :)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e39947c60be5ff21beeb5dbbbbca68a3/a477aeddd27b10b6-93/s640x960/9a2e8438f9f8ed70682bc0df362ee0c68a89c42f.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1485d0cfc663cf0a0842c5e2dda1a791/a477aeddd27b10b6-a6/s640x960/5773b5cd11389ff1096608de70c887178f46c07d.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0f3e85aa0a328b9db7324ff889441243/a477aeddd27b10b6-b4/s640x960/bdb547674756190aa53573fe6a3c7042ee5b2687.jpg)
#batfamily#tim drake#dick grayson#jason todd#batman#batfam#cassandra cain#alfred pennyworth#stephanie brown#damian wayne#bruce wayne#batkids#batfam imagine#batfam dc#batfam au#batfamily social media#batfamily x you#batfamily x reader#batfam x reader#batfam x you#batfam x y/n#dc reader insert#dc batman#dcau#dc#dc social media au
177 notes
·
View notes
Text
I Want To Fuck A Priest | Matt Murdock x AFAB!Reader
PART 6 of The Vault
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ab04be86364a28ef01c4f6656083ff0c/4b3b88a35eda8c8d-4d/s540x810/75208672ae1c0ca68211308d3b034c4581810e59.jpg)
See this post for more information on my Valentine's Day Special & Follower Celebration, but these fics can be read separately!
Pairing: Matt Murdock x AFAB!Reader
Summary: You have a thing for the priest you met at a farmer's market. Thankfully, he has a thing for you, too.
Warnings: SMUT (18+ MINORS DNI), porn without much plot, Priest!Matt, blasphemy (!!!), church setting, improper use of a priest's collar, improper use of a confessional booth, improper use of the act of confession, praise, prayer, oral afab!receiving, slight Dom!Matt, Catholic guilt, Fleabag reference, seriously if you are religious or triggered by the improper use of religion DO NOT read this!
Word Count: 2.8k
A/n: This is for those who watched Fleabag and then saw all the 'Imagine Matt as a priest' and 'Charlie Cox once played a Spanish priest' posts and thought, "Same!" when Fleabag said, "I want to fuck a priest." I see you, and I feel you. I wrote this after re-watching Fleabag one night, but I added a little poetic twist while editing because before, it was just completely plotless oral sex. While that isn't bad, I needed to add some vibes. You're welcome.
Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
The church bells ring as the clock strikes midnight. The night sky is void of dark clouds. In the darkness above the massive walls encasing the holy ground, the stars shine brighter than the city lights. New York City, the city that never sleeps, makes an exception for the house of God in the dead of the night, it seems.
It’s been…several years since my last confession.
The graveyard attached to the church looks threatening in its vacancy. It’s void of human souls except for the dead ones buried there. A raven claps its wings in the distance, following the gush of wind that brushes through the trees.
The bell rings twelve times before it stops, but the echo bounces off the stone walls and shakes the stained-glass windows, which seems to drag on for an eternity.
The last time I confessed my sins was before my communion. I don’t know if that makes me a bad Catholic, but lately, I’ve been having sinful thoughts, and I need to get them out of the way before I collapse under the weight of them.
You considered for the longest time whether or not you should come here. Faith has been your enemy for the longest time. You don’t believe in the Catholic Church, and yet you have found your way here, in the middle of the night, when everyone should be asleep in their beds.
This isn’t a normal night, by any means. You often lay awake at night and question your purpose in this life, but lately, you’ve been feeling like you’re drowning. Sins are subjective, and you never paid much mind to the term until now.
The thoughts you find yourself having late at night when you’re awake and lonely are far from holy. They aren’t ideal. They make you wonder just why you are thinking this way now.
But no man has ever been like him. And the worst part about it is that wanting him alone is an unholy train of thought you should have never submitted to.
You tried ignoring it, carrying it all by yourself, and trying to heal whatever complex you may have that could have led to this obsession in the first place, but your life has been a mess for long enough that it doesn’t even surprise you anymore, and no matter what you tried to do, you couldn’t stop fantasizing about him.
He is the reason you came to church tonight to confess your sins. But you’re not here to find your way. You’re not here to ask for guidance from God. You told yourself that the unholiness of your thoughts needs to be cured and that is why you came here—to make this situation better for yourself—but the thought is ancient; it’s the twenty-first century and you’re the kind of person who knows exactly what they want and how to get it. The truth is, you’re here to get what you want, even if it will land you in the pits of hell for all eternity. And even if it kills you.
“You don’t do this kind of thing often, do you?” the low voice asks from the other side of the confessional booth.
You shake your head. “Not at all, Father. When I went to Sunday Mass this weekend, it was my first time in a church in a very long time,” you admit to him, “and this is my first confession since I was a child. I…I’m not really a devoted Catholic, you understand. I’m merely struggling right now, and I…I am in desperate need of guidance.”
Your lip quivers. Your voice resembles a tidal wave that comes and goes as nature pleases.
He can’t see you. It’s not the curtain that is separating you and is starting to feel like worlds apart—he can’t see you. He can only hear and smell you, and that alone makes your thighs clench with need.
Should you be doing this in a church? Should you fantasize about a man of God and want to claim him, coming to his sanctuary to tell him the truth and mess with his head? You know that it’s wrong, but the wrong thing often feels too right to stop.
When you met him at the farmer’s market the other day, he was so endlessly kind to everyone, including yourself. He invited you to Sunday mass, and you went. You went on a walk with him afterward, and there seemed to be something there, but he couldn’t act on it because he is who he is and what he is. He made a vow. He can’t have you, no matter how badly he wants to, and one look into his unfocused hazel eyes when he took off those red glasses he always wears told you that he does want you. It led to another sleepless night among many, and now you’re here.
You’re so utterly selfish, but God, you can’t stop it. When you want something, you would do anything to get it. He makes you feel things you never felt before. It’s terrifying, but you have to allow yourself to jump into unknown waters if you want to learn how to swim.
He clears his throat, and you can hear the chair creak under his weight as he shifts. Is it possible that you’re doing the same to him that he is doing to you?
“I want to start by saying that you’re really brave,” he says. The sound of his voice is enough to make you shiver. “But God offers people guidance in a symbolic sense. I can take your confession, tell you how to repent for your sins, but I can’t tell you what to do.”
You sigh. “I wish you would though.”
A chuckle passes his lips. “Why don’t you start by telling me what’s weighing you down, sweetheart, and we will go from there?”
Sweetheart.
Yes, you think, this is your one-way ticket to hell.
“I’ve been having thoughts,” you confess.
“Thoughts?” he asks.
“Yes. Unholy thoughts.” Your breath comes in weak puffs of air. The booth seems to cave in on you. You wish he would step out of his booth into yours and stuff his cock into your mouth. For him, you would shut up. You would do whatever he tells you to do, and you would do so gladly.
Fuck. You want to fuck a priest.
But lucky for you, Father Matthew wants to fuck you too. He’s here, at midnight, because you were lost and he was still there—he told you he spends his nights at church sometimes because the city gets too loud for him. You couldn’t go anywhere else because any place where he isn’t doesn’t seem worth visiting.
Matt sucks in a sharp breath. You imagine him swallowing, his white collar constricting his labored airflow. You imagine him pulling at it to free himself, but he can’t. Those sinfully thick fingers of his would feel even better on your skin.
“Unholy thoughts,” Father Matthew asks, “about whom, sweetheart?”
He’s pushing your buttons with that nickname. It’s so not professional. The lines are starting to blur.
“A man,” you tell him.
“A man?”
“A man of God.”
The confession causes a bout of silence. You could have heard a hairpin drop.
His chair creaks again, and his voice reminds you of an animalistic growl right before an apex predator attacks its prey. “And what unholy thoughts have you been having about this man of God?” he inquires.
Your inner walls clench around thin air. Sweat drips down your temples, and the arousal soaks your underwear. Your nipples strain against your shirt. If you grip the seat any harder, you will soon find wooden chips under your nails.
You lick your lips. “I’ve been thinking about him touching me,” you whisper. “And I want to touch him.”
“Where?”
“Everywhere.”
“And in your thoughts, does he satisfy you?”
Your answer comes promptly, “Always.”
There is not a scenario in which Father Matthew could possibly leave you unsatisfied.
The chair creaks again. Something in the air shifts.
Your voice is breathless and needy, and so fucking desperate when you speak into the silence, “Just tell me what to do, Father.”
“Okay,” he says. His leather shoes drag across the floor of the booth and toward the curtain that marks the exit of his side. The next word out of his mouth knocks all the air out of your lungs, “Kneel.”
You don’t even have time to question his request. Within seconds, the curtain through which you’ve stepped into the confessional booth is torn to the side, and there he is, in all of his glory, right in front of you, and his thick cock is straining against his black slacks.
You pinch yourself, but you’re not dreaming. This is real. This is what you wanted, and you weren’t imagining the mutual attraction due to delusions. He does want you, and he is about to break every rule in his book—and the lord’s book.
You sink to your knees. The only thing you can see on his face is pure, unbridled lust and the ugly truth of Catholic guilt. He must loathe himself for wanting you.
Matt removes his glasses, revealing his beautiful eyes to you. In the dim candlelight, they appear almost black.
“What’s my sentence, Father?” you ask.
His hand brushes your cheek. “You have no idea what you’re doing to me,” he breathes.
“I’m sorry, Father.”
“No.” He steps into the booth and closes the curtain behind him. “Tonight, call me Matt.”
That is the last thing he says before he gets on his knees before you, and he captures your lips in a bruising kiss that is strong enough to make the angels howl.
His hand rests around your throat, feeling your pulse. He may not be able to see you with his eyes, but the way he touches you paints a perfect picture of your presence, and you feel every last ounce of his devotion.
He explores the depth of your mouth with his tongue, tasting you, loving you. His hands feel beautifully rough against your skin, just like you imagined they would be after years of praying. He sees himself as the hands of God. A messenger. His goodness makes your heart swell and your core flood with more than unbridled arousal—this is human nature in all its emotional glory, and you no longer feel ashamed. You can’t possibly when he is holding you like this.
He exhales into your mouth—no, he breathes life into your soul. “You’re the most sinful yet purest thing I have ever laid my hands on,” Matt says.
You gasp against his luscious lips. “I wouldn’t want to make you turn your back on God, or–”
He cuts you off, “I did that when I first thought about your body on mine and coming so deep inside of you that you’ll carry me with you for days. I don’t care about God because if having him means that I can’t have you,” he says, “I don’t want him anymore.”
You swallow his words with a kiss. Turning a priest against God was never your intention, but you are not in charge of his feelings, nor will you ever be. Matt wants you badly enough to abandon religion, and you will carry that with you until the day you die.
He lifts you back onto the edge of the wooden chair, pulling at your clothes and your undergarments. The moonlight hits his face as the cold air of the church hits your bare pussy. He looks ethereal like this, on his knees for you. His hazel eyes bore into your soul. He wears his heart on his sleeves and a collar around his neck.
Your priest crosses his chest. He asks God for forgiveness. And then, with one gentle tug at your thighs, he buries his face in your wet cunt, and he feasts as if your sex was the last supper. As God’s disciple, he is determined to eat up every last bite offered to him. Every last drop from your cunt is his, and your lips part in a moan that echoes through the church like the bells did when it hit midnight.
“Fuck,” you cry out.
He flattens his tongue against you, licking a long stripe over and then through your folds. He twirls the tip of his tongue over your clit, stroking the sensitive bundle of nerves with such precision, your walls clench at the sheer explosion of pleasure. You have never felt anything like it. He turns something unholy into heaven, and you’re drowning in the river to the Garden of Eden.
His lips suction around your clit. The obscene squelching of your velvety walls fills the booth. It sounds deadly noisy to you. You want to cover your mouth to stop the moans from traveling, but he traps your hand with his, guiding them to his hand, telling you to guide him.
Instead, one of your hands moves to his collar. It’s his turn to moan. You tug at the symbol of his priesthood, forcing his tongue deeper into your hole. He laps up your juices as though his life depends on it.
“Forgive me, Lord, for I have sinned,” Matt murmurs against you.
You moan again, louder this time. He is repenting for wanting to dive into your pussy until he gets swept away by the tide, but it is far too late to back out now. Your pleasure has become his priority.
“Lord God,” he repeats, “in your goodness have mercy on me.”
The pleasure is turning into a tight knot in your lower abdomen. You can feel it consuming you and your senses. You’re floating. The light at the end of the tunnel is not so far out of reach anymore. Every suck and every lick at your folds, and every thrust of his tongue into your tight walls pushes you closer and closer to the edge of ecstasy.
In your goodness, have mercy on me.
He bites down lightly on your clit. Your toes curl, and his name comes out in a groan.
Do not look on my sins, but take away all my guilt.
Right now, you are his God. By drinking your arousal like holy water and pushing you toward an orgasm he is repenting. The symbolism makes your heels dig into his back as you buck your hips against his mouth, and when he adds one of those thick fingers, curling them up against that sweet spot inside of you, you can barely stand it anymore.
Create me in a clean heart and renew within me an upright spirit.
“God, Matthew!” your moan interrupts his plea for penance only briefly.
He swats your thigh. “No blasphemy when I feast at the altar,” he says. The vibration of his voice adds to the knot, tightening it, and threatening it to burst.
You’re almost there. Almost…
“Have mercy on me, a sinner,” he continues. His tongue slides between your folds once again, gathering your slit. His fingers curl upward again. He’s mixing different prayers, or maybe these are his own words, but you are not sure how much longer you can hold it. But he wants you to hold it. You don’t want to disappoint the man who is worshiping at your feet, your pussy, his altar, and you are his salvation as much as you are his saving grace.
“In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good,” he prays, “I have sinned against You whom I should love above all things—but fuck, I don’t.”
Does that mean he loves you? It is too soon to tell that, but he is devoted, and devotion can be just as sinfully sweet as the rawest feeling of love.
“Have mercy on me, God. Amen!”
His collar is starting to tear under your vice grip.
Matt thrusts his digit into you until it disappears, and he finally decides to show the mercy he was begging for to you. “Come for me, sweetheart,” he says.
Your thighs lock around his head as the knot breaks in two. You come, hard, and the wave tears him down with you, shooting his cum into his slacks like the good Catholic boy he is.
You let go of his collar when your orgasm has done its damage.
“No,” he stops you.
“No?” you ask, still breathless.
“No,” he says, lifting his head to grin at you, not like a man of God but the Devil himself. “I have not done nearly enough penance.”
As a priest, Matt is used to being on his knees until they’re bruised; until he can’t stand straight anymore, so he has to remain there, cowering before a God he more often than not does not believe in.
Before you can protest, he dives back into your endless ocean, and you have no choice but to lean back and take it.
He is not the only one doing penance tonight, after all—you both are.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/de8c9ba630ad16dec6ec606f30afa5e8/4b3b88a35eda8c8d-c8/s540x810/f95a565be1b6ca2cda59bdcfcccedef444214bdc.jpg)
Matt Murdock Smut Tag List: @acharliecoxedfan @gpenguin666 @linamarr @mcugeekposts @itwasthereaminuteago @norestfortheshelbywicked @yarrystyleeza @littlenerdyravenclaw @etanordoesbullsh1t @thychuvaluswife @harleycao @schneeflocky @imjustcal @pipsqueakkitten @merlinbtch @sya-skies @amberritonicole @ravenclaw617 @pigeonmama
#matt murdock#matt murdock x reader#matt murdock smut#matt murdock x afab!reader#pwp#afab!reader#matt murdock x you#no y/n#priest!matt#matt murdock priest au#daredevil#daredevil x reader#charlie cox#from the vault#reader insert#inspired by fleabag#because who doesn't want to fuck a priest
291 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh we're cooking. we're cooking alright. WE'RE GETTING THERE!!!!
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c2fa3f4e358d5d05cb73c05f664d8ef7/26e32f57253e449a-74/s540x810/5fecb89c57055b880cab6032f9426ed18a578f4a.jpg)
don't have that much good stuff to share yet because it's really rough but here, have this.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/c5fe26146e689e1e6938dee1c259b274/26e32f57253e449a-1a/s540x810/82e0a702b06b9db37e82432e1ef64feb9e8d74dd.jpg)
#I knew once I got to the smut it would start flying off the page#the smut is very very rough though so lots of edits will be needed#I'm splitting my attention between adding more writing and editing what I already have#guys I... I feel like this... will be like 20k words before they've even fucked yet#I have a whole nother scene to add before they start going at it#and then I need to edit which will surely add a ton of words since what I have now is essentially no more than a rough outline#what.... what have I done#I set out to just write a bit and then it consistently turns into the longest thing I've ever written#WILL THIS FIC EVEN BE GOOD / ENTERTAINING ENOUGH TO JUSTIFY THE LONG WORD COUNT AND EXTENSIVE SMUT#I don't know...... nobody knows.....#I might write a bit more but I'm getting tired so it's bedtime soon yawn
40 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi fayebae, imma send these before i go for my hiatus again(im not sure if you alr have smth planned for tyun n hyuka! cos i know u have a yj fic thats coming soon, so ill send these in for them)
was thinking of tyun x reader for this
uk the series “academy reincarnation”!! There was a salsa dance ep! I was thinking that reader decided to sign up to the salsa academy where tyun is one of the instructors?/student! reader wanted to learn salsa for the longest time but has always been afraid to as one would usually need to dance in pairs. afraid of having any physical contact with any stranger(due to a trauma she formed from a relationship), even tho it was difficult, reader eventually let down her walls with tyun as the many practice sessions go by, she finds herself now looking forward to salsa practices as thats the only time she can see tyun! And she craves his touch. During one of the practices, they got so lost in the dance that their faces ended up really close to each other! Tension arises(she wants him, he wants her, dare i say more 🤭smut of course!) [didnt wanna write too much to allow ur creative freedom!!]
i hope this is good gah(just thought i should send smth in for the other members too hehe, pls dont put aside ur wip again!! Do this after ure done w ur yj one gah) love u my soobie fav boobie💗
TENDER TOUCH
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/49794c6b4992c4e2efcdc59ba43bf2f3/9502291e4c6e27ae-98/s540x810/181336b9f9b2652da222da17b9dde8b18a0e10a5.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3437202a5692cc8182419e45283bfa0d/9502291e4c6e27ae-dd/s540x810/36381e517397615d9dc6e0993652e10454f733bf.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e520c6c33d989f0b1f86d27d43d2e9fd/9502291e4c6e27ae-a8/s540x810/239cc9eebcc5a161f39912cc69bb363558ed0376.jpg)
TH 002 .F22 2024
wc 5.3k
pairings gentle!Taehyun x abused!reader
warnings physical and sexual abuse, traumatic experience, traumatized reader, protected sex, abusive ex-boyfriend (idk what else did I miss)
faye's note *insert: Taehyun's 어디 있지 (where am I) in boba😳* as promised, here's my second fic for the day! this is my first Taehyun fic and I'm fucking obsessed that it got up to 5.3k words, wth. Anyways, @inkigayocamman I know you requested a Tae fic, but here's another one for u to enjoy I guess while I'm still working on it. 🙂↕️ I hope you like this too! And ofc, to my one and only Beomgyu's kitten, I love your brain, it's so sexy omfg. I'm totally sat. Plus yeah, the yj fic is still on the line. 🤣 Anyway, I did a few research(again) for this fic, so I hope it turned out good, fingers crossed!
Edit: Thanks for proofreading the whole ass fic @babymochibeargyu I'm dead now. 😭😂 luv uuuu 😖💓
"Learn how to dance Salsa, we offer multiple dance forms for beginners to professionals. Come join us..." You mumbled reading the flyer your friend handed you.
"Jia, you know I can't do anything like this anymore." You sighed as you handed her back the flyer.
"I know, I know, it's because of your trauma, right? But maybe this is the way that can only help you overcome that trauma," She started, "I'm worried about you taking this class but I'm more worried about you carrying that trauma all throughout your life." Jia gently holds your hand, still careful not to scare you with the skin contact.
You're lost in your thought for a while thinking if you can really let go of your trauma after all this time. It's been so long since you haven't engaged in any relationship after your last one.
"I-I'll think about it." You sighed, you really wanted to be free but you just didn't know how to start. "Please do, I really wanted to help you." Jia's eyes are full of worry, sadness and guilt. Because it's been so long yet she can't do anything to help.
You've always been wanting to learn how to dance Salsa. It's like your little dream ever since, however, your boyfriend from your last relationship did not even want you to be touched nor be grazed by any man's skin. You insisted you could just pair with a girl but he threatened you to hurt anyone who will be around you if you kept on insisting to register for the dance class. You ended up not registering for the class and burying your little dance dream into the depths of your heart.
The following week, you found yourself standing in front of the dance academy building. Breathing slowly, thinking deeply whether you really want to do it or not. You were clutching on the flyer tightly. Your knees fell weak as you stumbled down, retreating all the way to the confinement of your apartment to hide from the world.
It took so much courage for you to do this. Especially when you ended up trying once again a week later. You're standing in the front of the building, staring at the swaying banner of the academy with a "SALSA DANCE ACADEMY" written on it.
You softly knocked on the door before opening it. "Hi! Come in! How may I help you?" You were greeted with s young lady, clad in a salsa dance costume. She looks bright and bubbly.
"I.. Uhm.. wanted to register for the class." You meekly answered as you slid down on the chair. "May I know your name?" The lady picked up the pen on the table and grabbed a file.
"Y/n...y/n s/n." You silently answered.
"What class would you like to be included in?" The lady's smile never faltered. Her bright aura makes you feel comfortable for a bit. "What do you offer?" You asked back.
"Well, we have group sessions and we also have one-on-one lessons," you nodded at her, signaling her to keep going. "In group sessions, there will be 15 pairs -- 30 individuals in a class, plus the 2 dance instructors," you felt pressured with just the thought of being included in the group. "In the one-on-one class, we will find you a pair if you still have none, or you can bring one, and then also a pair of instructors," she explained.
"I'll take the latter."
"Please sign here and we'll wait for another one to sign up." She smiled again at you. You were thinking of bringing your friend to the class.
"By any chance, can I bring a girl for the one-on-one class?" Her expression suddenly turned sad, "I'm afraid we are only taking a man and a woman as a pair for the one-on-one class. Usually, the pairs who sign up for the one-on-one class end up acquiring advanced skills than those who are in the group."
You thought of backing out once again but you shook your head to clear your mind. You're already here, you're already a step closer to the most awaited time of your life: to let go of your trauma.
"We'll call you once we receive another sign-up for a one-on-one class. Thank you for dropping by." The lady waved her hand as you stepped outside.
You shrunk to the corner of the door, people are looking at you but you're too occupied to even give a damn.
It's been a week. You didn't know how to explain how you felt. Half of you felt happy that you hadn't received a call yet, because that would only means you didn't have to do it anymore and there wouldn't be anymore skin contact for you to trigger your trauma. However, the other half of you felt disappointed. You would have been lying if you said that you didn't get your hopes up, thinking that this would be the way to be finally free from your trauma.
"Still haven't received a call?" Your friend placed the pizza she brought on your coffee table. Today was the day she would usually pay you a visit to your apartment. She started doing this from 2 years ago, when you and your ex-boyfriend finally broke up.
You hummed in response as you dug out the box of pizza. Nevertheless, you don't want to bring your thoughts about the dance academy again.
A couple of minutes passed when your phone rang, causing both your heads to look towards your phone
"Hello?"
"Hi! Can I talk to Ms. Y/n s/n?" The voice over the line spoke brightly.
"Y/n speaking." You just answered back, looking at your friend who's anticipating a piece of good news.
"We just want to inform you that someone already signed up for the one-on-one class as your pair. The class will start this Monday, are you fine with it?" Your friend sighed in relief as soon as she heard it.
"O-okay. Sure." You felt a rush of anxiety travel throughout your body, as your fingers trembled hanging up the call.
"Hey, it's okay." Your friend wrapped the thick blanket around your shoulders before hugging you. Afraid that she might trigger your trauma. "You'll be fine." She tries to calm you down by rubbing your back.
2 days passed by quickly. Enough to make you coil up in bed instead of getting up. Your phone vibrates from an incoming message.
Dearest Jia: Take care later, okay? I know you can do it. I won't be able to go because of work, so I hope you understand:< but I'll pick you up when you're done! <3
You: I don't feel like going.
Dearest Jia: Noooo! You've come this far. You should go, I know you can do this!
You: Fine, I'll text you when I'm done with the class.
You tossed your phone on the bed as you grunt into your pillow. You're just glad your dance class starts at 3 in the afternoon. You still had a lot of time to prepare your body and mind.
Quarter to 3, you're already in front of the building, a few people going in at the same time. Probably for the group session. You wanted to go home but the lady called you out.
"Y/n! Please come in. I'll accompany you to the assigned room. I'm Daeun, btw." She extended her hand to you but you froze. You're too afraid. But someone else caught Daeun's hand. "I'm Taehyun, the one who signed up for the pair." A tall guy appeared on your side, shaking her hand. "I-i'm y/n." You meekly introduced yourself without touching any of them. The lady looked confused at first but she shrugged it off.
"Okay, I'll leave you two here, Mr. and Mrs. Hwang are inside already."
Taehyun pushed the door open, you were both greeted with a polished wooden floor and mirror walls in the wide room. Two people were sitting in the corner. They must be your instructors.
"Please come in!" The lady waved at the both of you.
"Do you know each other?" The man asked which the both of you only answered by shaking your head.
"I think we should start our class with an introduction. Don't you think?" The lady nodded.
"I'm Mr. Hwang and this is Mrs. Hwang. She's my wife and we mainly teach one-on-one classes. You are?" They turn their gaze to Taehyun.
"My name is Kang Taehyun. I also dance but not in this genre. So I wanted to learn this." They then looked at you.
"I... I am y/n. I signed up for the class t-to overcome my t-rauma." Your words are slurred, and your reason made your instructors gasp. "I-I used to be in a r-relationship. And t-they're the reason why I can't e-even touch people or let other p- people t-touch me." You bit your lip as you look up at them.
"Honey, but I'm afraid this dance requires a lot of holding and touching, what should we do?" Mrs. Hwang clasped both of her hands on her mouth as she turned a bit emotional.
"By any chance, can you hold someone when there's a barrier between them? Like, there is no direct skin-to-skin contact?" Taehyun spoke up, you nodded lightly at him. "It's been two years so I think I can tolerate it to an extent."
"Then I think we're good Mrs. Hwang. I'm thinking of using a glove or something. If that's what makes her comfortable. I don't mind at all." Taehyun remarked.
Taehyun ended up wearing gloves for your dance class. And as much as possible, he's avoiding any of your exposed body parts. He's also lightly touching you that you feel as though it's just air grazing your body.
So far so good, the 3-hour class ended up okay. Jia picked you up 30 minutes later after you texted her that you were done.
Your dance class went well the next day. And the day after that. And the following days after that. Days became weeks, weeks became months. It's all going well, with Taehyun's careful assistance over you.
Today was the day you decided to step further to your goal.
"Taehyun, I think we can now stop using the gloves. We've been dancing for a month now and I hate it whenever I think about the gloves. It feels like I'm being disgusted by you or something." You stated to Taehyun once the two of you were on a quick break. Within one month, you grew closer to Taehyun. The quick breaks were your time to tell stories to each other.
"Are you sure? You're not making me feel like any of that, by the way. But are you sure you can do it now?" His eyes seek yours. You simply nodded as you removed your jacket leaving you with your t-shirt on.
"Are you two, okay? Shall we continue?" Your dance instructor asked, checking on you, as you and Taehyun stood up. Taehyun discarded the gloves he was using on top of his bag as he folded his long-sleeved t-shirt up to his elbow.
You started off well. Taehyun holding your hand as gently as he could as usual. Letting you turn around with some quick footwork. It was all good actually, until he needed to lean in, holding your waist and your thigh. One more turn, his arms and fingers graze through your arms. His delicate fingers holding your waist once again. A quick turnaround. A step faster. A more closer proximity.
"You fucker! Come back here! I know what you did!"
"S-stop! We're already over Han!" You squealed as you blocked the door with your body.
"You're fucking dead meat when this door opens!"
Your tears wouldn't stop flowing from your cheeks as you kept your body pressed on the banging door. Han has been your boyfriend for 9 months now. At first, he was so good to you, treating you like the princess you deserved to be. But it was too good to be true that you started to feel it was wrong. Just 2 months ago he started hurting you physically and abusing you sexually. He was too obsessed with you too that he sometimes he would start locking you up in your apartment. Even your requests got declined. At first, you let it pass as you thought it was normal. But you started earning bruises and wounds. You barely ate, barely drank, you even barely slept. You would often get fevers too. The slightest noise would make your soul jump out and the slightest movement would make you flinch.
Jia, your friend, was the one who advised you to report him. So you did, that was why he was here banging at your door.
Han's voice can no longer be heard, hence you decided to quickly hide in your closet, as you dug out your spare phone you had hidden to contact your friend.
You quickly called Jia, telling her to call the police or something but you were cut off when the door bursts open. Han was holding a gun and laughing hysterically.
"Fuck you, you bitch! You're really dead!" You quickly covered your mouth.
"Come out, kitten. Come out from wherever the fuck you're hiding!" His voice echoed through the room drowning your quiet sobs.
That's when he forcefully opened the closet you're hiding. "Ohhh, you look so scared kitten, why?" He cooed at you as his lips stretched to form a mocking grin. "Move to the bed!" You shook your head. "Fucking move to the bed!" He fired a warning shot at the mirror, crashing it. You yelped at the noise. With your trembling body, you quickly scrambled your way to the bed covering your bruised-up body.
"Strip." He commanded as he pointed the gun at you. With no choice left, and your life at stake, you did what he ordered.
He crashed his lips on yours harshly. When he noticed you didn't kiss him back, he slapped you. Blood flowed through your lips as you choked on your sobs. With the gun still pointed at your head, he started harassing you again. His hand left a bruised mark on your neck as he tightly squeezes it. You could almost see the white light as your weak body just let him do anything. There was no use thrashing around as if you had accepted your dying fate.
"Freeze!" Was the only thing you heard before everything around you went black.
You opened your eyes inside the hospital, pulled every apparatus attached to your body and started screaming. It made Jia scream out and call for a doctor. They couldn't calm you down so they needed to give you a shot for temporary sleep.
Everything came swirling back to you. Pushing Taehyun away, causing your body to crash on the wooden floor. "Shit!" Taehyun cursed under his breath as he hurriedly pushed back his sleeves and wore the gloves again, picking up your jacket at the same time, before coming back to you. Your instructors let out a shock gasp as they also rushed over to you.
"Please grab a blanket or any thick clothing!" Taehyun shouts as he tries to ease you by covering your shoulder with your jacket.
Mr. Hwang passed Taehyun his padded jacket he always brought with him. Taehyun carefully wrapped the thick jacket around your body. He holds your face as he tries to soothe you.
"Y/n, look at me, please look at me." Sweat started to form on his forehead as tears freely flowed down your cheeks. "Please, look at me, and breathe slowly. Breathe slowly. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale." Taehyun guided your breathing as his glove-cladded hands rubbed your cheeks.
Mrs. Hwang was panicking but Mr. Hwang tried to calm her down before he went out to grab a glass of water.
Your heartbeat slowed down for at least a bit. Taehyun guiding you helped somehow as you slowly calmed down. Taehyun got the water from Mr. Hwang and held it in front of you as he let you sip on the water slowly.
"Are you feeling okay now?" Taehyun tucked your sweaty hair behind your ears. His eyes were full of worry. "Do you wanna go home and rest?" He's still carefully rubbing your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have removed the gloves. That was too risky." Taehyun mumbled as he hesitated to hold your hand.
That same afternoon, he called your friend over. He introduced himself and explained the situation. He let your friend take you home as he bid you two goodbye. You're lucky it was Friday at that time so you don't have to worry about waking up the next morning to go to your dance class. For the next two days, you spent it caving in your room. It helped you calm down.
Monday. You opened the door. You laughed at the scene in front of your eyes.
"What's that?" You chuckled as you placed your bag on the corner. Taehyun looks at himself in the mirror. He's totally covered. He's wearing a thicker glove and a padded jacket. His usual dress pants are now sweats. He's even wearing a mask. He scratched the back of his head.
"Pft. That's too much. Don't worry I'm fine now. Thank you by the way." You smiled at him.
"Are you sure? Because that scared me. I don't know what to do." He removed his jacket along with the face mask and the thick gloves.
"Mhm, I'm sure." You assured him.
"Okay then. We'll try again. Slowly this time." His eyes are full of concern as he looks at you. You smiled at him as you accepted his hand.
For another month, Taehyun tried to connect with you. Stopping whenever needed. Wearing the things he needs to wear whenever he can sense your anxiety rising. For once, you realize how he gently holds you. How he's always careful with you, treating you like a fragile glass that would easily break if you weren't handled correctly. One month passed without much problem. If anything, you're actually growing accustomed to it.
For some reason, you learned to feel comfortable with Taehyun's touch. The graze of his skin, his fingers, and his touch never terrified you anymore, and his existence no longer made you panic.
Now, he's solely the reason why you're still attending your dance class. You're slowly putting your trust in him. You're slowly putting your walls down. He can now hold your hand without fear. He can now dance without thinking that you would startled. He slowly introduced you to the steps that requires your body to be closer. Teaching you how the steps are supposed to be done. You're no longer panicking. Even when your face is just only few inches from him, you were actually smiling at each other. You no longer feared his touch. If anything, he's only leaving you all tingly with his warm skin.
You could feel the warmth radiating off his body. Whenever you leaned on his chest, it made your heart flutter. His breath on your shoulder, your neck, any part of your body makes the knot in your stomach twist tighter.
You're slowly craving for his touch. For how he cares for you, for how he tends to you. Whenever you're home, he keeps popping into your head. How his sharky smile appears whenever he's happy. The small noises he made. His cat-like attitude. He's the perfect example of hot, sexy and cute.
Every last week of the month, you would have all the time to yourselves to gather all your skills acquired. Because every once a month, you had to show what you have learnt in class. This now left the two of you alone in the dance studio. Perfecting every step and move you needed to show on evaluation day.
Taehyun's lingering touches left you all tingly. His deep voice sent a shiver down your spine. His breath alone makes your mind go in a twist.
"One step back, two steps to the front... One turn and... Lean you down." He's matching his words on every beat of the step. You thought it only happens in a fantasy world. But it was like the world stopped when his eyes were fixed on yours. His steady breath makes you hold yours. His eyes traveled down to your lips as he gulped. He mumbles a soft "You're pretty," before pulling you back to stand on both your feet.
His hands are both on your face as he slowly backs you to the mirror. His breath is unsteady and warm. The moment he got you pressed on the mirror, he leaned his forehead on yours as he closed his eyes.
"You're really pretty. So pretty I'm afraid I can't control myself." He whispered. Your hands were on his chest, you felt how his heart was thumping so hard.
"S-should we head out early?" You whispered, your hot puffs of breath touching his lips got him reeling as he cursed under his breath.
He quickly pulls away, holds your hand and grabs both of your bags. Both heading outside to his car. "Tell your friend I'm taking you home instead." The air in the car throughout the drive was so thick. His hands were gripping on the wheels, tapping impatiently when the road slowed down.
"Calm down, Tae, I'm not going anywhere." You chuckled as you placed your hand above his when it was resting on the gear shift. He throws a quick glance at you. He bit his lip as a flush crept up on his cheeks.
The drive was short, but Taehyun's action made it look like it was not. He hurriedly got out of his car, running over to your side to open the door for you as he held your hand. His jittery steps were heavy as you both made your way to his humble home.
"Come in." He nervously spoke as he placed his shoe on the rack, switching the light on in the process.
"D-do you want a drink or something?" He was almost running towards the kitchen.
You flop on his couch, making yourself comfortable at some point. "Come here, instead," you chuckled, "You're so anxious for no reason, Taehyun." He sat down beside you, wiping his sweaty palms on his dress pants as he sighed. You scoot over, holding his face, lips just a few inches apart.
"Wait," he pushed you a bit, "a-are you sure about this?" You nodded and smiled at him. "G-give me a minute." He rummaged through his back pocket pulling a handkerchief. You looked at him confused.
He unfolded the handkerchief and gently placed the thin fabric on your lips before crashing his lips on yours. He holds your nape as he climbs up on the couch. He slowly laid you down. Lips unmoving, yet it feels so hot. His lips were just merely pressed on yours with the fabric separating both of your soft skin.
He pulled away, kissing your forehead. "I'm sorry." He whispered as if he was the one who did you wrong. You gently pull the handkerchief away as you tangle your fingers in his hair. Taehyun never failed to take care of you in the most gentle way possible. He's not thinking of his pleasure at this point. He's thinking about you. To the point that he even thought of putting a piece of cloth between your lips just to be able to kiss you.
You wanted to cry at how he's taking care of you. Your eyes welled up with tears as you pulled him back. "I'm good now Tae, thank you for taking care of me. There's no need for the hanky." You whispered before your tears rolled down your cheeks as you kissed him, bare.
He's a gentleman. He's too good to be true. But you let your walls fall down and let him enter. You let him protect you instead. But his hungry kiss spoke thousands of emotions. His kisses travel down to your neck.
"Taehyun..." You whimpered as you gripped his hair.
"A bit more... Just a bit more..." He started sucking and biting your neck and shoulder, leaving splotchy red marks. He pulls away for a while, enough time to tug your shirt off your body.
His fingers slowly traced every scar you have on your body. The marks on your chest from the bottle Han once threw at you. The cigarette burns on your stomach. He also pulled down your skirts only to see stitches from your thighs. You got this when Han pushed you down the stairs. His finger draws back to your lips. The scar from the cut when he slapped you is still visible.
You covered your face out of embarrassment. You no longer look pretty with your all bruised-up body. "We can't do this here." Taehyun got up and carried you all the way to his bedroom. He laid you carefully as ever in his bedroom.
The bed dips down at his weight as he kneels between your legs. His head dips down to kiss every scar you have on your delicate body as if he's kissing your trauma away. He took his precious time. Not wanting to scare or startle you at any point. His actions are being done with all tenderness.
"Do you still want me to continue?" He asks when he hovers above your body, his elbows on both sides of your head. "I want you Taehyun, please do..." You whined biting your lip. "How can I say no when you say it like that, sweetheart." He sighed leaning his forehead on yours again. Your arms crawled under his shirt, feeling his toned body hiding beneath the soft cotton shirt he was wearing. "C-can you take it off? I feel so exposed." You mumbled as you tugged his shirt. "Ah, shit, I'm sorry." He quickly backed up to discard his shirt on the floor.
You stared at him when he was all fours above you. His body is totally toned. You can clearly see the firm muscles on his arms. His buff chest and his perfectly defined abs. "Touch me. I won't stop you. Touch me so you won't feel embarrassed anymore. Touch me so you won't feel as if I'm taking advantage of you. Touch me so you won't feel scared." He grabbed one of your hands and placed it on his chest, slowly dragging it down to his abs.
When he lets go of your hands, you continue to drag them down to the waistband of his dress pants. "C-continue..." His eyes were shut close, his lips trapped between his teeth. You can clearly see his abs tightening as he clenches with the graze of your finger on his waist. He gulps when you hook your finger inside. You unhooked the clip that's binding his pants and pulled the zipper down. His breathing hitched at the lingering touches you're leaving on his lower body.
You gently stroked him as you looked for his eyes. His lips were swollen at how he was biting it. "You won't let it out?" You tried taunting him. "Fuck..." He lets go of his long-held breath, hissing through his teeth. "Y-you're making me crazy, sweetheart... You're totally making me crazy..." He huffed as he tucked your hair behind your ear.
"Condom?" You asked. He reached into the small drawer just beside your head, pulling out a packet of condoms. "D'you wanna p-put it in f'me?" His words were short, and he was catching his breath. You gently rubbed the head of his cock as you rip the packet with your teeth.
"S-sweetheart, you're... Shit... You're k-killing me." He shuddered when you pressed at his slit, his jaw clenched tightly, his hand grasping the sheets.
You slowly drag your fingers on his cock as you wrapped it with the condom. "T-take your time... I w-won't do anything to hurt you or...ahh... or m-make you s-scared of me." He's struggling to hold back but he's doing his best. As soon as you were done, you tangled your fingers on his again, pulling him for a kiss. A kiss full of care. Gentle. Delicate. Sweet.
He pulls away, caressing your face once more. He pulls your underwear in one swift motion as he lines himself up on you, slowly pushing in. He continuously soothes you by rubbing his thumb on your cheek. "Don't be scared, hm? I'm here. It's just me..." He keeps on mumbling, repeating the same phrase as you nod back at him.
Once he has bottomed out inside you, he stays still as he continues to plant soft kisses on your face. You were tearing up not because of the trauma anymore, but because of the love and care he's showing you.
He unhooked your bra as he gently groped your breast, his fingers flicked on your nipple as he suck on the other. "Mmm..." You whimpered underneath his big body squirming at how his tongue danced on your nipple. He didn't take long, afraid that he might hurt or trigger your trauma.
"C-can I move now? I might end up c-cumming now. You've been clenching f-for some time..." He muttered under his breath. You nodded and covered your face again.
He pulled both of your hands and intertwined your fingers with him above your head. "Please don't cover your face. You're beautiful. You're still pretty even with your scars. You're still gorgeous even with your fear and trauma. Please... Just let me take care of you. I know it'll be hard for you, but I promise. I promise to hold you dearly and cherish you." His eyes were looking for answers.
"Taehyun... Please... Please take care of me from now on. Please hold me when I feel scared... Make me feel loved..." Your silent weeps were drowned as he kissed your nose. "I'll be your peace, sweetheart." He wiped your tears as he slowly thrusts in you.
"I... I promise to hold you as gently as I can... But... I think I might end up g-going hard right n-now." He buried his face in the crook of your neck.
Your arms reached over his back as your nails dug and dragged over his bare back. "T-Taehyun..." You moaned out his name as you writhed in pleasure beneath him. The slow thrust becomes a little bit more sloppy. The skin slapping echoed through the solitude of his room.
"Fuck. Please forgive me if e-end up going t-too hard. But I promise to d-do my best to hold b-back." He grunted as his thrust went harder. You shook your head wanting him to go harder.
"I-i can't hurt you... I w-won't..." He steadies the way he thrusts inside you making the knot on your stomach tighten as you feel your high just around the corner.
You held him as if your life depended on him, "Taehyun... I'm close." "D-do it, sweetheart. I'm g-gonna cum any m-minute." He pressed his lips on you to drown your moans as you both came. He rubbed your waist as he soothed you before pulling out. Tying the condom and disposing it in the bin, zipping up his pants at the same time.
He bends down to kiss your forehead as he grabs a pack of wet wipes cleaning you up. He picked up his shirt and made you wear it. He finally laid beside you as he pulled you on his chest, running his fingers through your hair.
"Are you hurt anywhere?" He checks on you, to which you replied by shaking your head and a smile. "Sorry for going too hard, I did my best to hold back," he mumbled as he kissed the top of your head. "I'm okay Taehyun. Thank you so much." Your eyes finally close as his warmth embraces you. He hums while still hugging you close to him.
"Please rest now, sweetheart. When you wake up, you no longer have to suffer anymore. You're safe with me. You're finally safe with me."
@binniesbooks 2024
#faye's library#taehyun's books#taehyun x reader#taehyun smut#taehyun x you#kang taehyun x reader#kang taehyun x you#kang taehyun smut#kang taehyun imagines#taehyun scenarios#taehyun imagines#kang taehyun scenarios#txt smut#txt imagines#txt scenarios#txt hard hours#txt hard thoughts
125 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm smiling so hard at my current (and only) wip, it's so delicious so good I'm obsessed with it 💗 it's everything I want and need from an abo fic, it's unashamedly self-indulgent and just ahhhhh
I think it will beat Predators for me as the best fic I've written. Also it's gonna be the longest one. I know for sure some of you (you know who you are) are gonna be obsessed with this fic just like I am currently bc we share a brain
I'm so excited for you kittens to read it 💗 I'm smiling again agdjdjsllqhskeeieowjsqljswlwl
EDIT:: IT'S HERE!
#im tweakin cause ive just written the plot twist and im crawling up the walls#i cant even reveal the name of the fic cause it's a surprise#sterek#sterek fic#my fics#stiles x derek#eternal sterek#sterek fanfic#that feeling when you wrote something and you KNOW it's good#💖💗💖💗💖💗💖💗💖💗#im gonna be so annoying when this comes out#im at the finish line!!!!!!!#also I'm seeing posts and tags and i shut myself up so hard to not say anything cause I'M WRITING IT I'M WRITING WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT#i swear im sane
106 notes
·
View notes
Text
Vacuan Nights, Like Vacuan Days
They’re just so great together! I’d love for Jaune and Weiss to get a little downtime in Vacuo to live out a moment like this. They really deserve it, and I’d love to see Jaune’s guitar make a reappearance.
The comic here was inspired by u/Silverstar1243’s excellent piece of art, A Serenade Under the Moonlight. Send some love to them on their twitter, commission some art if you’re willing and able, they’ve made some great stuff.
You folks may have noticed I threw in a couple of references for those in the know; the Golden Oreos behind Yang (double stuffed, I might add) for the trio’s ship, Weiss liking it rough for Mallobaude’s great fic, and of course I made a whole theme around the Arabian Nights Disney song. A song, along with its Aladdin compatriots, which I spent the better part of a day finding covers for just to listen to on repeat while I worked.
This one’s now officially my longest comic project, with 14 panels, two over the past record since I added the White Knight kiss at the end. I’m pretty happy with how it turned out. Not sure I’d say it was more difficult than my Vanity of Vanities post, but for this one I actually knew how to use my editing software going into it (at least somewhat).
Put a lot of work into this one, been working on it on and off since February. Took a few breaks for vacation, to make my memorial post for Rooster Teeth, and another five meme edits or so, but I came back around to it. First half was pretty easy, relatively minor edits inserting characters into scenes and so on. The second half with Jaune and Weiss was tougher though, with color correcting, merging poses, redrawing features, drawing Jaune’s entire head to fix some lighting issues, etc. Really like how the edit to make Jaune strum his guitar turned out.
The time it took to make the whole comic got me down a little, until I did a bit of math. Including my side projects since starting this, all the scripting and editing and all, I’ve been pumping out a panel every two days. That seems pretty good to me, that kind of accomplishment makes me a little proud of myself.
Really need to get around to watching the second part of the Justice League Crossover movies. It’s got a few Vacuo scenes that might make things a little more authentic instead of me just using Saphron’s house and pretending it’s a suite in Vacuo. I do love taking yet more character stills from Jaune and friends experiencing deep trauma and turning it into something positive, been making that a bit of a personal habit. And I’ve got to say, the background for Jaune and Weiss’ scene is really beautiful, pulled it from when Sun and Neptune hear Ruby’s message about Salem. That’s just a really good shot all on its own, I even saved a copy for my computer’s wallpaper after editing out the two.
Posting a big RWBY White Knight edit, watching not one but two RWBY Beyond episodes, and all on the trail of the news that RWBY’s found partners that they’re negotiating with and that the creative team is expected to stay on. And I'm sipping bubble tea. Life is good.
Anyway, pardon the long write up. I’m invested in this one, and am quite pleased with how the comic turned out. I hope you all get a kick out of it as well!
#rwby#jaune arc#weiss schnee#rwby white knight#white knight#rwby whiteknight#whiteknight#jaune arc x weiss schnee#jaune x weiss#yang xiao long#golden oreo#yang x jaune#yang x weiss#yang x jaune x weiss#blake belladonna#ruby rose#qrow branwen#sort of#shipping#comics#rwby memes#memes#greenlightvolume10#rwby volume 10#rwby news#vacuo#jaune's guitar#needs a come back#disney#aladdin
241 notes
·
View notes
Text
Cruel
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/285210c0a22310fcb97b949cdc808d74/1fce8d49aa33134b-86/s540x810/cf5b0c6a7a3be82c0151b046ee64f95fe922cb85.jpg)
Pairing: Nicholas x F!Reader
Masterlist: here | Crossposted: ao3 | Word Count: 5.7k
Warnings: Cocky Asshole!Nick, stereotypical cliché rockstar behavior, toxic af, petnames, fingering, oral (f receiving), p n v, cream pie, canon big fat co-, dramatic and cliché, ~making love~, happy ending, lightly edited, [you deserve better than men like this!!!], 18+ MDNI
Summary: Your long time on-again/off-again love finds you the second his tour bus reaches home. Even with your walls up, he charms his way into apartment and back into your heart.
A/N; Not my best work but this wip has been sitting in my drafts for over a year, finally decided to let it see the light of day. Enjoy 💕 Also… this almost became a Jake Kiszka fic…
“You paint a picture of us, just to burn it. Fool, I’m a fool if the shoe fits.”
- Cool // Gracie Abrams
The minute the GPS was set to home, there was a buzz on your phone that had been absent for the past two months. You unlocked it mindlessly, thinking nothing of it, but the second you read it your heart sunk to your stomach.
❌DO NOT ANSWER❌:
Gonna be back in town around midnight.
See you then?
Absolutely not. Why would you do that to yourself again. Yet, against your better judgement, you answered.
No.
You sent back simply, with your heart pounding in your ears.
He replied almost immediately. The speed of it made your heart flutter but you had to remind yourself that he was probably just bored on a tour bus. That you were probably just the easiest option after having an endless pick of groupies on the road.
Oh, c’mon don’t be like that
We could have fun
The thought of having him again sent a wavering behind your ribs that you quickly tried to squash down. You tugged your bottom lip between your teeth in thought. No, no, no – you repeated in your head like a mantra.
You: I don’t have fun with you.
Nick: It sure didn’t seem like that before I left
It was a half lie. While you did have fun together, he always came at a cost. He was never yours, not fully. Right before tour was always the worst.
While he was home everything felt different – domestic even at times, and each time you convinced yourself it’d be different, that that time would be the one to stick, that he would stay yours. But then weeks leading up to tour things would change, he’d grow distant, and fights would spawn out of nothing. In an instant, he wasn’t the man you were in love with. Love wasn’t a word you ever threw around in your label-less relationship, but it was felt, at least on your end. Regardless, sex was the one thing that always kept you two together – but it made you weak and pliable.
You: That’s not true and you know it
Nick: Just let me see you, we can talk about it
You mulled it over in your head. Your heart wanted nothing more than to see him again but that was exactly the reason you needed to resist. It was a war between your head and your heart and for once, your head was winning. You were sick of the rollercoaster of loving him, sick of getting your heart broken repeatedly. This tour was the biggest and longest they’d ever done, almost double their usual length, and the fallout with him before he left was the most damaging it’d ever been. The extra time apart allowed you to process the pain and assess the relationship. You’d been able to accept it for what it was and come to terms with the fact that you’d never have him the way you’ve always craved. While he was away, you grieved the crumbs of your situationship and chose yourself for once. Though, the pain that bloomed from that decision felt like a betrayal to your heart in the moment, but you knew it was for the better.
You know it’s for the better.
You: I don’t want to see you, Nicholas.
Nick: I wasn’t aware we were lying to each other now
Heat rose to your cheeks and your stomach churned in anger and pain as your brain flooded with infinite memories of him lying to you.
You: Oh, that’s fucking rich coming from you
Nick: Just let me see you
You: No. Why the fuck should I let you
Nick: I wanna talk Nick: I have something for you
You: I don’t want anything from you
Though, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t curious. Sometimes he’d bring you little nothings from his travels, but nothing notable or worthy of being a bargaining chip.
Nick: Just let me see you.
As much as you didn’t want to admit it, his persistence was wearing you down. It’s a horrible thing to be lovesick for a man who gives you just enough slices of dopamine to make you forget why you were mad or cautious in the first place. It was toxic and thrilling all at once. It was nothing but lies – both from him and yourself. Your heart was beginning to feed you false truths like: he could just come over, you’d call him on his bullshit and let him leave without him getting to you.
You gave into him, like you always did.
You: Fine. But you leave when I tell you to. Nick: No problem. See you in an hour.
You mentally scolded yourself, but you couldn’t help but feel the flurry of butterflies running rampant in your stomach.
After a while, you checked the time and noted that about an hour and a half had passed. Fear and disappointment trickled down your spine at the idea that he might not even show up after you gave into him like a fool. It made you sick to your stomach even though it wouldn’t be the first time he’d done that.
About 10 minutes later you heard a knock at the door and adrenaline spiked in your bloodstream. You took a look in your full-length mirror and smoothed out your silhouette. While you fed yourself the lie that nothing was going to happen, your hands chose a flowy sundress that laid mid-thigh.
When you opened your door, you were met with Nick in comfy clothes, clearly fresh from off the tour bus. As indifferent as you should’ve been, you couldn’t help but take notice of how good he looked with his hair up in a messy bun. Still, just the sight of him felt like a dagger through your already bleeding heart. It was a torturous duplicity being so in love with him, yet so heartbroken from just looking at him. All the work you did to suppress and heal your wounds crashed back down to square one. The second he spoke you knew you’d made a horrible mistake.
“Hey.” He smiled and you could tell he suppressed a smirk.
“Hey.” You replied flatly. Your resiliency was already begging to falter. You hadn’t heard his voice in months, and it stirred something in you – something both vicious and compelling. You came to realize that this was a dangerous game you chose to play.
His eyes fluttered down your frame, soaking in the vision of you completely. “You look,” He paused, and you expected something vulgar, but he surprised you. “Fantastic.”
A peachy hue grew on the tops of your cheeks at the compliment, and you silently reprimanded yourself for letting him get to you already.
He stepped closer to you, brushing your hair just behind your bare shoulder to admire you fully. “All this for me?”
And just like that, the flutter in your stomach fell along with the edges of your lips. Your eyes begged to roll at the question, but you restrained it to just a scowl. “What are you doing here, Nick?”
“To see you silly.” He said nonchalantly while his crystal eyes held something more you couldn’t place – it was like a glint of something deeper than he was letting on. “Now let me in, won’t you?”
You sighed and stepped aside to let him past you. “You said you wanted to talk?” You pressed against the door to close it behind you. When it clicked into place you rested flat against it with your arms crossed.
His head tilted around the small space to take it in, even though it wasn’t drastically different, any remanence of him was gone. Then, he met your eyes again to answer your question. “That’s what we’re doing, isn’t it?”
You groaned, unraveling your arms to ball your fists at your sides. “You’re so fucking infuriating.”
So much for keeping your cool.
He huffed out a maddening laugh. “All worked up, are we? Must’ve been really frustrated while I was gone.”
“Actually, it’s been real fucking peaceful.” Your arms crossed back over your chest. “What do you want, Nicholas?”
“I wanted to see you.” He said earnestly, this time with less smugness to it. “And to give you this.” His arm went behind himself and into his back pocket only to pull out a palm-sized stuffed black cat. He held the sitting stuffie in his hand on display.
Your heart sunk the second your eyes landed on the stuffed toy. Both anger and heartache bubbled into your stomach, into your veins and all across your skin. Your shoulder muscles stiffened reflexively. “Why the fuck would you bring me that?”
The truth was that the cat contained more than just stuffing – it represented a past floating idea of a shared black cat between you. Whenever you two were at your best, you discussed adopting one together. You’d keep it at your place since he’s so often away from home, but it would be shared nonetheless. It never happened of course, but there he was holding a physical placeholder for it.
“I saw it and thought of you.” He said infuriatingly nonchalant, though you couldn’t tell if the ignorance was genuine or not.
You crossed the threshold between you and snatched the stuffie from his hand. You squeezed it by its sides in front of his face, “This is cruel, and you know it.”
While you were fuming, there was still a small pathetic part of you that swooned at the fact that he remembered such a small thing.
He reached out to graze up your jaw to your chin. “Even when you’re pissed at me you’re beautiful.”
You smacked his hand away from you, not wanting anything to do with him or his dizzying games. “You are such a fucking prick, and you know it. You know what this little toy means to me, and it means nothing to you.” You nearly spat at him while you shoved a finger into his sternum.
He grasped your wrist, keeping it in place as he stepped forward. “Who said it doesn’t?”
The air between you seemed to dissipate, leaving your throat barren of oxygen. Yet, your self respect held strong against his convincing words. “You’re a liar. A cruel liar.”
He closed the gap between you further until his lips were hovering just above your own. “I’m not lying.” Your nose filled with his scent – peppery cologne, weed and beer. It wasn’t the most pleasant mixture of smells, but it was him and he was something you’d missed and longed for the past two months. His smell and his proximity had your chest swirling with love and desperation. You wanted – no – you needed him to be telling the truth this time. It had to be the truth.
“I’m not lying.” He replied softly with his eyes falling from your own to your lips then meeting your gaze once more. “Let me show you how honest I’m being.”
It wasn’t your smartest move, giving into him so effortlessly. He just made it so easy to believe anything that came out of his pretty mouth. It wouldn’t be the first time you fell for his tricks and unfortunately, something told you it wouldn’t be the last.
When your lips met, it was electric, sparking and hot. You weren’t sure if that was just what he’d always felt like or if it had just been months since he touched you last.
It didn’t take long before his fingers frantically tangled in your hair. You matched his energy, curling fists into the base of his bun. He stumbled you both back onto your couch with your lips glued to each other’s. The kiss was full of fire and pent-up tension.
You ended up with both knees on either side of his hips. Your lips landed on the spiderweb tattoo on his neck, immediately sucking at the ink. He let out a hiss at the intensity of your suction. Your hips swiveled over the bulge growing in his pants.
“Fuck.” He groaned and tugged at the hem of your dress, silently asking you to pull it off.
You detached from his neck briefly and yanked the sundress off your body tossing it on the floor. Before you could return to your spot on his neck, he grabbed your face to meet his lips again. It was messy with teeth clashing and hasty tongues fighting for dominance.
Your hands fumbled between your bodies to unzip his jeans to let him out. You wondered how he was even able to stay in his pants with his massive size when he was hard. You took him in one hand while the other stabilized you on his shoulder. He groaned into the kiss as you worked him in your hand.
His fingers curled tightly into your hair, “I need to fucking be inside you.” He all but growled.
You nodded quick and breathless, you needed just the same. You tugged away and spit multiple times onto his impressive size. It had been months since you’ve had him, there’s no way this wasn’t going to hurt.
You lifted on your knees, as much as you could, Nick helped by pushing your panties to the side and sliding his fingers up and down your folds.
“You’re so fucking wet for me.” His fingers dipped inside you, just a fingertip deep to gather some of your juices and used it to better coat your entrance. He paused and his brows furrowed a bit. With how full you felt with just one finger you could only imagine what he was thinking. “You’re going to need more prep than this for me.”
You whined, but you knew he was right. It had been so long since you’d taken him, and your cunt needed time to refamiliarize itself with his size.
Your hand never halted on his length, and it was obvious on his twisted features and his mouth slightly parted. No matter how angry you were at him, it didn’t take away from how pretty he looked when he was drunk off of you.
He pumped his finger slowly in and out of you just to set a pace before adding another. A small gasp fell from your lips at the addition and stilled all of your movements.
“Just relax baby,” He soothed, and you softened in his hold. “That’s it, let me take care of you.”
It was a weighty thing to ask of you, but your mind turned to mush the second his thumb found your clit, rubbing slow circles on it. Your eyes rolled back, and your chest gave way to him. “Fuck, Nick.” You muttered out pathetically.
“I missed you.”
-was the last thing you expected to hear from him in that moment, but you were so lost in euphoria that you couldn’t wrap your head around it. “Mmmhm.” You hummed as your eyes fluttered closed. “Missed you too, Nicky.”
You were absolute putty in his hands, he knew exactly how to work you into whatever he wanted. You were easily pliable to him, and in that moment, he was grateful for it. He placed a soft kiss to your collarbone, then another at the base of your neck. “Missed me how, angel? Tell me.” He whispered, his voice low and crackly.
Your jaw fell slack when he added a third finger but you were so worked up that it hadn’t been that difficult. It still burned but the pleasure he was supplying to your clit was overshadowing any pain.
“Use your words, princess. Let me hear how much you missed me.” He was practically begging you for any morsel you’d give him. He’d never admit it but he was desperate for you too. “Tell me baby, did you touch yourself thinking about me?”
Your head lulled to the side, cascading your hair over your shoulder. “Uh huh.” Was all you could muster.
“Mmm. Like this?” His fingers curled inside you, hitting that sweet spot that was rarely touched by you or anyone else.
You gasped at the feeling in tandem with his thumb on your clit. His fingers pulsed against the soft inner tissue in a rhythm that made your brain numb. It was a spot only he had ever really been able to reach, either with his fingers or his cock. He knew your body better than anyone else ever had and he was good at it.
A smirk played across his lips, evidently satisfied with your response. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
The warning of an orgasm burned in the pit of your tummy, filling it with tingling warmth. It must’ve been all over your face because he caught on quickly. “Oh, what’s wrong? Is my pretty girl going to cum already?” He spoke smoothly up your neck while his fingers increased their speed ever so slightly, just enough to tip you over the edge.
You abruptly grabbed hold of his shoulder, squeezing it with every bit of strength inside you as your orgasm washed over you. The euphoria began just below your navel then spread electricity across your skin. You felt it everywhere, down to your fingers and your toes.
He let out a satisfied chuckle against your throat, “That’s my girl.” He praised and held you as your body began to collapse against him. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”
When you were finally spent is when he really came to life.
“Fuck I need to taste you.” He exhaled and as soon as you nodded, he snatched you, holding you with both hands securely below your ass. He was in a frenzy, like a shark that just smelled blood. “I want to taste all of you, every bit of mess you just made.”
He hastily carried you over to the bed across the room in your small apartment. He laid you gently, but impatiently, on the edge of the bed with his lips planted on yours.
You barely had time to miss his lips before his tongue latched onto your clit and his fingers returned to their place inside you. He brought you back down to just two fingers in order to give you a bit of reprieve.
Your mouth immediately created an ‘O’ shape with wide eyes at the skill of his tongue. “O-Oh.”
He ate you hungrily as if he hadn’t had pussy in weeks which historically, when he’s off on tours, was quite the opposite. He gave you no time to get caught up in your thoughts with the way his tongue slithered ‘S’ motions from your clit to your entrance, then taking his time at your throbbing bud. He lapped up every bit of your orgasm, not wanting to leave anything behind. The feeling bloomed a sparking heat from the pit of your core to the rest of your body and you silently cursed him for making you feel so good.
When you glanced down you noticed that while he was bent eating you, his hand had been on his cock – gliding up and down swiftly and in rhythm with his fingers and tongue. You thought that might’ve been the hottest thing you’d ever seen, and you couldn’t keep your eyes off of the way he couldn’t not touch himself while eating you.
You let out a tiny moan at the sensation of his tongue against your swollen clit. But god did he feel good. It had to have been his extensive body count that made him good in bed and while you didn’t like thinking about it, you were surely grateful for it in the moment. His tongue expertly spun around your nub with various patterns. You couldn’t help but wiggle around at the stimulation to which he hooked his arms around your thighs and brought you to the edge of the bed. His knees met the wood floors, his tongue never once wavering. When he pulled your bud into his mouth with a suck you knew you wouldn’t last much longer.
You shook your head, while he felt amazing, you needed more. “I need your cock, Nick, please.” You begged, pathetically.
His lips curled into a smirk against your core, placing a soft kiss at your clit. “Whatever you wish, princess.”
Your heart swelled and your tummy swirled at the name, it was your favorite, and he knew it. You were convinced it was the best sound in the world when it fell from his lips.
He pressed kisses up until your mid torso before pulling away. You whined at the loss of contact, but you knew it was only for something better. You squirmed at the attention and parted your legs even further, wanting more.
“Look at you, all laid out for me.” He cooed, with his eyes wandering across your body trying to choose his favorite part of you. His fingers trailed up your thighs, taking his time to savor your skin. “Okay, now baby, take a deep breath for me, will you?”
You did as he instructed but your breath hitched in your throat as he slid his fingers inside you once more, this time adding a third finger again. It burned a bit, being stretched out that much, but you knew it had to be done in order to take him fully.
“Good girl.” He hummed as he began pumping his fingers in a slow pace. After some time familiarizing you with the span of his fingers, he decided he wanted to take it further. “Actually, can I have you a different way?”
You nodded, too fucked out to deny him of anything.
His hands were rough when he flipped you over onto your stomach. His pointer and ring fingers slid up, spreading your lips open to let the tip of his cock sit at your entrance. He leaned down to just beside the shell of your ear.
“I wanna hear how bad you want it.”
You let out a near guttural groan at the statement. You were clenching around nothing just at his proximity.
“Oh c’mon, I can feel how bad she wants me.”
“Please, please I need your fucking cock.” You begged.
He smirked against your skin, “Good girl.” His hips moved forward, slowly pushing himself into you. You could feel yourself parting around him painfully, even with the prep you did. Your hips stiffened up not quite remembering how to take him. He took his time, carefully moving deeper inside you.
“Now tell me baby,” He hummed, dipping his fingers down between you. His fingertips slid around his girth to feel where you and he became one. You wondered if he could feel the burn that he was causing. “Has anyone else touched this pretty pussy while I’ve been gone?”
The question caught you off guard, quite literally the last thing you ever thought he’d ask you in this situation. Your eyes instinctively wanted to widen but you squeezed them shut instead. Heat bloomed on your cheeks, but you hoped he didn’t notice.
“Oh, c’mon now, be honest.” He teased in a patronizing tone.
You swallowed all the saliva left in your mouth and pressed your lips shut tight. You knew you couldn’t lie to him, especially not in such a vulnerable position. The truth was that you tried any and everything to get him out of your mind - which landed you some vices in your time apart. You and Nick weren’t anything of substance, nothing official. You were sure Nick had to know since it had come up previously and he never seemed phased by it – you knew about his tour hookups, how would this be any different. Regardless, you had no idea why he was even bringing it up and wished he wouldn’t.
He didn’t seem to like your silent pause and halted his movements. “If you don’t answer I’ll stop.” He threatened.
You groaned in frustration and threw your head down into the mattress. “Fine, fine,” You spat out in defeat. “Yes. One.”
“Hmm.” He stretched out the noise to emphasize his disbelief. “I think you’re a poor liar.” His fingers grazed over your clit briefly, just to remind you what you were missing. “Don’t lie to me baby, you won’t like the outcome.”
You sighed, feeling defeated and helpless beneath him. “Two.” It was the honest truth. One of them he knew about, a long-time casual friends with benefits. The other, was a drunken mistake from the bar on a particularly lonely night.
He sheathed himself fully inside you, “Yeah I can tell.” He said in a pointed tone, and it caused your brows to furrow, wondering what exactly he meant by that. “Oh, don’t worry I don’t mean it that way.” His fingers trailed down your side to hook into your hip, pulling you flush against him. “I can tell by the way you’re trying to adjust to me.” His voice was smooth and deep. “Like your body got too comfortable with something less than me.” His hips shifted back just to fall back into you, hitting you right in the spot that made your stomach twist. It was painful but delicious, reminding you exactly why you’d made this mistake with him so many times. “Or is that what you prefer now?”
You shook your head quickly, you didn’t want anything other than him, you never had. As rocky as your relationship had been, Nick was always the one who owned your heart. It never for one second had been held by anyone other than him in the past couple years. It was sad how loyal you were to him when it was obvious that he never felt the same – at least not in a committed way. “No.” You breathed out. “I want you, Nick.” You looked over your shoulder to meet his eyes and they were filled with something that felt almost like jealousy, but you’d never known Nicholas to be jealous. He’d always been very fluid about your connection – always very clear about the openness of your relationship.
“Say it again.” He demanded while his hands held your hips in place as he slammed back into you in one swift move. His tip landed straight into your cervix, causing a jolt of pain up your spine.
“I want you, Nick.” You repeated with a strained voice.
He finally began a slow rhythm in and out of you, almost like a reward for listening to him. He reached forward and grasped your chin to get you to look back at him again. “Again.”
Your brows knitted at his request – it seemed almost cruel for him to have you repeat the obvious. “I want you.” You whispered. Tears began to well up in your eyes and you couldn’t tell if it was from your emotions or from the burn of him stretching you out. He squeezed your cheeks at the sight of your tears, silently asking you again. “I want you.” You squeaked out, trying to keep the tightness in your chest at bay. “I want you, I want you, I want you.” You repeated over and over, now letting tears flow freely down your cheeks. It bloomed an ache in your chest that you never wanted to feel in the middle of sex.
Suddenly, you felt him pull from you completely but before you got a chance to question it, he flipped you over onto your back. You were only vacant of him for a millisecond before he slid back into place between your legs. He hovered over you, his unraveled hair gathered onto one side of his head, brushing against your shoulder. “I don’t want you to ever question that again.”
“I never did.” You admitted embarrassingly quick. “What’s this about?” You questioned, wondering why you were having this conversation while he was still inside you. Though, he was never one to choose an appropriate time to talk about things.
“I missed you.” He repeated his statement from earlier that you were too fucked out to process. His voice was raspy with lust, but genuine. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
You blinked up at him and shook your head, not wanting to get caught up in his empty promises. “Can we just talk about this later?” Although, the moment had already been squandered for you.
“No.” He continued his slow and steady pace while his eyes were set on yours. “I mean it. I want this. I want us.”
Your eyes grew wide in disbelief. You’d never heard him sound so serious about anything, nonetheless about you. “You do?”
“I’ve been an idiot. All I wanted to do was come home to you.” He pressed his forehead against yours. “And the idea of someone else touching you makes me sick. I’m selfish. I want you all to myself. I want you to be mine.”
“I’ve always been yours, Nick.” You whispered with brows curved up in sincerity. Even with flings and vices your heart never beat for anyone else, you could never love another – no matter how stupid it made you look. You were stuck on him whether you liked it or not. You’d always been his even when he wasn’t yours, even when he wanted nothing to do with you.
His grey eyes shifted between your glossy eyes trying to read your honesty. He said nothing more before uniting your lips into the deepest kiss you’d ever felt. Love was a whisper lingering on your tongue, but you knew tonight wasn’t the night for that. Passion quickly spread from your heated kiss to the speed of his hips. His thrusts were fast and hard, though they weren’t fueled by a promise of an orgasm but rather by a need to show you exactly how he felt. Your entire body bounced against his rough repetitions, and it was overwhelming in the best way.
His head fell into your neck, his heavy breaths against your sensitive skin sent tingles across your body. “You’re taking me so well.” He muttered below your ear. His hand found your leg and ran his fingers beneath it, pulling it up from behind your knee and bending it towards you as far as it would allow. The new position spread you out even more and made sure you felt everything – the way the head of his cock embedded itself into your g-spot and the way your walls stretched around him. “Doesn’t that feel good baby, being so full?”
You let out a moan as your eyes rolled back. “Fuck yes.” It was the truth, no one ever filled you like he did.
“Uh-uh.” His hand grasped your cheeks. “Eyes on me.”
The sensations of everything were enough to fill your clit with buzzing need and you gasped when his thumb found it. Your eyes widened as he began rolling small circles into it in time with his quick pace.
“Oh-oh.” You stuttered out pathetically as you felt the knot in your stomach tighten, threatening to snap already.
“Take your time baby, there’s no rush.” He soothed but it only accelerated your already impending orgasm. Your fingers curled into his arms harshly, surely hard enough to leave half-moon imprints into his skin. “Oh, I know, I know.” He comforted.
That’s all it took to unravel you. Tingly warmth spread across your body, making every inch of you feel blissful. It was enough to temporarily blind your vision as you got lost in the immense pleasure that was overtaking your entire being.
“That’s it angel, just like that. I want all of it.” He said softly below your ear, but it was clear with the shakiness of his own voice that he was close too.
His speed became rapid and erratic as he sensed you reaching the height of your peak. “Fuck.” He murmured into your neck as he slammed his hips into yours faster than you could process. “Fuck I’m gonna cum.”
All you did in response was cross your legs around his waist to pull him in deeper. It didn’t take long for him to meet you in your climax. You felt his cock twitch and pulse inside of you followed by warmth pooling in the deepest part of you.
When the moment was over, Nick took his time, tenderly ensuring you were both clean and comfortable. Aftercare was something he never skipped, but tonight, he seemed especially patient and tender. Once he’d helped you into your favorite pajamas and made a warm cup of tea, he pulled you gently into his side.
“I’m sorry it took me so long.” he said, peering down at you with a sincerity that made your heart ache.
You gave him a small knowing nod, too spent to say more. Curled against his side, a quiet apprehension settled over you, memories of past mistakes lingered softly at the edges of your mind. He was the last person you should trust, but your heart couldn’t summon the strength to turn him away. So, you chose to believe in him once more, silently hoping this time would be different and that his words were true. As he held you tighter than ever, your choice felt right. Finally, he was yours, and you were his.
A/N; thank you so much for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts<3
Taglist; @measuredingold @ladyveronikawrites @deathblacksmoke @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning
#bad omens fanfic#bad omens fanfiction#nicholas ruffilo fanfiction#nicholas ruffilo fanfic#nick ruffilo fanfic#nick ruffilo fic#nick ruffilo fanfiction#bad omens rpf#bad omens smut#nick ruffilo smut#nicholas ruffilo smut
104 notes
·
View notes
Text
Can't Stay Away from You - Chapter One
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/97842cfb5f94a1dfff468564f663e51f/719ec7f6071fabfe-95/s640x960/2fbf19553bdf2fd67191698aa98cd55f82be4f11.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/b51751f0372369295c9743991f4f4db3/719ec7f6071fabfe-ce/s540x810/1f02e95df471e1abf0a409da28fd407129d297c8.jpg)
First chapter woot woot! This is by far, the longest chapter I've ever written, at over 7k words, and honestly, I hope this is good? It's my first time writing a/b/o, and I'm a little unsure of where this is going exactly, but I hope everyone will have fun on the rollercoaster that this fic is bound to be!
masterlist
word count: 7k
warnings: defintely some angst in here, but lighter angst?, reader is anxious at parts, but like for the most part, there's really not much to warn about I think? Please let me know if I'm wrong or if I need to add anything!
Y/n wasn’t expecting any emails, but when she heard the ding that let her know she had received one, she immediately looked. She never knew when she’d get another freelance job, so whenever an email came in, she developed the habit of checking it. This wasn’t a work email, no, but it was from one of the stores she had recently bought a couple of Stray Kids albums from. From the subject line, it was about the albums she had bought, and a fansign? She doesn’t remember signing up for one, but she also has been so busy, she probably forgot about it.
Opening up the email, she found that she had won a place at an in person fansign in Seoul, in two days. She was so shocked by this news that she held her breath, not thinking this was real for a moment. She read through the email fully, memorizing every word, she really had won, holy shit. She thanked the gods that she didn’t work a physical job, because it meant she could work from anywhere, and she started figuring out her trip to Seoul. There was no way she was missing out on a chance to meet Stray Kids.
She quickly found a plane ticket, even if it was insanely expensive, and she thanked herself for her savings, having to dip into that a bit for this trip. She then moved on to finding a place to stay, and found a nice hotel that wasn’t outrageously expensive, and immediately booked it. She’d be flying out in about seven hours, leaving her to scramble to pack and leave for the airport. Quickly packing her luggage, having a packing list made up from previous trips, she packed clothes for a week, deciding to explore a bit since she was going there.
Y/n’s travelled enough to have mastered the skill of packing efficiently, gathering everything she needed into 3 pieces of luggage. She double-checked her travel list, making sure she had packed enough for her trip. Before she shoved her laptop and cords into her bag, she sent out an email to her current clients stating that she had an emergency occur, and that her work may be delayed by a day. At this point, it was almost time for her to head to the airport. So, she finished packing the last of her things into her carry-on. Remembering to grab her coat before putting her shoes on, she grabbed her bags and left the apartment.
She took a taxi to the airport, and on the way there, texted her best friend Emily that she was heading out of the country and asking her to watch over her apartment while she was gone. Emily agreed right away, and told her not to worry about anything. She smiled down at her phone, her bestie was her ride or die, and she was so grateful to have her in her life.
When she arrived at the airport, she thanked the driver, pulling her luggage out of the trunk and heading straight to the check in counter. The process was smooth and she was quickly on her way to security, which while terribly busy, went by quickly and soon she was sitting at her gate, having grabbed a couple snacks for the plane and filled up her water bottle on the way over there. She had about an hour before boarding, so she pulled out her laptop, deciding to get some work done while she waited. She finished off the last edits to one project, sending that off to one of her clients, before starting on one of her other projects.
Halfway through her second project, the call for boarding went out over the P.A. system, and so she saved her work, slipping her laptop back into her bag before lining up with everyone else. She was lucky enough to get a last minute window seat on the plane, putting her carry-on in the overhead bin, before settling in her seat as she pushed her smaller bag under the seat in front of her. She looked out the window as the plane took off, the start of her journey to Seoul, and meeting Stray Kids, was starting now. Since it was a relatively long flight, she pulled out her laptop once she was able to do so, starting back on the project she worked on earlier. She spent the majority of the flight working on her current workload, which was about four projects at the moment.
They were all fairly simple projects, they just took time to perfect them, but it was a great way to pass the time. By the time she finished her last project, there was only a couple hours left of the flight, and so she rested and watched the clouds roll by. Y/n admired the view as they landed in Seoul, excited to explore the city.
Patiently waiting to disembark the plane, she waited until she was able to leave her row, grabbing her bag from the overhead bin and then bringing it down, pulling it behind her as she left the plane. She pulled it along, heading towards the luggage carousel, before she went through customs and immigration, quickly clearing them and heading out into Seoul. She took the metro to head towards her hotel, unpacking her headphones and listening to music to pass the time on the train. Once off the train, she pulled out her phone to find her hotel location, quickly finding her way to the hotel. Thankfully, it was late enough that she could check in right away and head to her room. She took the elevator up, finding her room midway down the hallway, and upon opening the door, found that she had a beautiful view of the city around her.
She dropped her luggage by the bed, and walked towards the window, admiring her view of the city. She may not be a heights kind of person, but this was still beautiful, and she would be looking out a lot during her week here. She hauled her suitcase up onto the bed, pulling out a fresh outfit, before heading to the bathroom to shower. Once she had, she changed into her fresh outfit, pleased to get the smell of the airplane and airports off of her. Since it was still light out for a while, she decided to get out into the city and explore the neighborhood around her. She packed her smaller bag with the necessities, grabbing her key card on the way out the door and quickly going back down to the lobby and out into the fresh air.
Y/n knew travelling alone as an omega always brought risks with it, but it was worth it to be here in Seoul, both for the fansign and just in general. It was sunny and warm in Seoul, a great contrast from back home, and she was living for it. She was always a warm weather kinda girl, and the warm air and sunshine here made her thrive. She decided on just walking the area around her, figuring tomorrow would be one of her bigger exploration days.
She saw a lot of stores that intrigued her, but thought better of shopping, she’d be exhausted much quicker if she gave into that urge. She was glad that she brought her headphones, it helped distract from the loud noises of the city, and brought the level down to a reasonable one she could deal with. The hustle and bustle of the city was normal to her, since her own city was similar,
Up until now, her omega had been strangely quiet. Usually she was very outspoken, more so than y/n herself was. Her omega was going haywire at the moment, confusing the poor girl as to what set the omega off. She felt almost pulled forward, and her omega pushed to the surface, making her walk faster to wherever that pull was coming from. It culminated in her running into someone, and ended with her on the ground in front of them, looking up at their mask-covered face.
“Are you alright? I’m sorry that I bumped into you.” The person said as they leaned down, reaching out a hand to her. She tentatively took it, and she stood up with their help. Standing so close to them, she could smell their citrusy sweet scent, it calling to and calming her omega. That confused her slightly, but she shook it off, not wanting to think about it now.
“I’m okay, and really, I bumped into you. I should be the one apologizing.” She replied.
“Let’s just say we bumped into each other then? We both played a part in this.” They told her, and she could see that they were smiling by the crinkles near their eyes.
“I can agree to that.” Y/n replied, giggling slightly.
She saw as the other person took a breath of her scent, and for some reason they stumbled back away from her, their eyes widening.
“I’ve got to go, I’m sorry.” They said, rushing away from her, leaving her standing there alone on the sidewalk.
She watched him run away, and her omega cried out, and y/n felt like she had been punched in the stomach. Her anxiety shot up, and tears came to her eyes. She’s so confused, she doesn’t completely understand what’s just happened, and why she was so affected by it.
She felt increasingly down as she walked back to her hotel, no longer feeling any urge to explore, just wanting to retreat back into her room and nest. She speed-walked into the hotel elevator, avoiding everyone. Once back in her room, she locked her door and got to work making a nest in the bed, using everything she could. She finished it and then climbed inside, curling up into herself as her omega cried out to someone, for an unknown reason. That, and she couldn’t take her mind off of the person who ran away from her, and everytime she thought of him, it made her chest hurt.
In the end, she fell asleep, and she dreamed of them again. She had dreams every so often about Stray Kids, and she assumed this was once again, her brain being delusional. She dreamed about going on vacation with them, assumedly in Australia given her surroundings, but she felt that this dream was different.
She noticed that this time, the member’s touch and reactions felt more real? It felt like these were actually the boys, and not figments of her imagination like they usually did. Their eyes seemed shocked, even as they all enjoyed the dream. They were more touchy with her, Felix especially. She noticed that he looked similar to the person she ran into earlier, but shook it off as her just being delusional again. She enjoyed her dream and found happiness with the boys, as it was just a dream, that’s all.
Waking up the next morning in her makeshift nest, she whined at the lack of someone beside her, having fallen asleep in her dream next to the boys. Her scent smelled like burnt honey and vanilla because of her sadness, but she pushed through, thinking of happy thoughts and how she’d get to see the boys later today. She got up, having to get out of her nest that smelt like sadness. Pulling out an outfit for the fanmeet, she quickly showered before changing, and then moved onto her makeup and hair. She did her makeup like she usually did, leaning more towards a very natural look, knowing if she wore too much, it would be harder to touch up later on.
Before leaving her room, she checked the rules for attending the fansign, and quickly memorized them. She headed back to the bathroom, since one of the rules was wearing scent blockers, and quickly applied them to her scent glands, making sure she covered them fully. The rule had been put into place because of an incident with a second gen girl group fansign years ago, she remembered the aftermath of it very well, despite being young at the time. One of the fans, an alpha, attended the fansign and tried to overwhelm one of the omega members of the group with her scent, and since then, companies have made it mandatory that scent blockers be worn during fansigns.
Checking her outfit in the mirror once again, she made sure it looked right, fixing anything that was out of place. She had decided on an outfit that reminded her of a mix of Felix and Han’s individual styles, but had blended them together in her outfit. Plus, it was really comfy, and knowing she had a long day in front of her, she didn’t want to be stuck in something uncomfortable. She grabbed her bag, setting out for the day. She planned to explore and see some tourist sights first, before the fansign, since it wasn’t starting for a couple hours from then.
She mostly wandered as she wanted, not having a specific destination in mind. She found herself wandering a market and buying some snacks along the way. Everything she bought tasted better than the prior snacks, and she had to leave the market in a hurry lest she get distracted. To her benefit, however, this passed enough time that she almost had to run to make it to the fansign venue.
She made it there in under 20 minutes, and hopped in line with everyone else, having brought her ID, and had the email that she won as well. Checking in was a simple process for the most part, however the ID checking part was the most tedious. Once that was finished and they confirmed that she was who she said she was and that she was allowed entry, she was quickly shuffled into the hall where the fansign took place.
Y/n found herself about midway between the front and back of the hall, and almost straight in the middle of her row. She greeted the girls next to her, making small talk with them as much as she was able to with her limited knowledge of Korean. They mostly talked about their favorite members and songs, and whose outfits they liked the most in this recent comeback. Y/n enjoyed chatting with the other girls, and a couple more of the ones around them joined in as well, and just before the boys walked out, they had created a small group chat, adding each other on kakaotalk.
The minute the boys walked out on the stage, all eyes were on them, and the cheers were almost deafening. Despite it only being a small fraction of the number of people at a concert, it was as loud as a concert. Yet it only took Bang Chan raising his hand for the crowd of fans to fall silent.
“Hello everyone!” He said, waving to the room. He and the boys quickly introduced themselves and did their “Step out” intro as they always do. They took the first part of the fanmeet to goof around on stage, playing around with some of the items laid out for them by staff.
During this, y/n couldn’t keep her eyes off of them, feeling almost a pulling sensation in her chest, and a need to keep an eye on the boys. She ignored the pulling feeling, trying to enjoy the fansign and commit this all to memory. She soaked in the atmosphere, the joy that radiated around the room, from the fans and the idols. It filled her with happiness, the feeling almost bursting out of her chest.
It wasn’t long before they boys had moved onto the signing part of the fansign. She watched as each row of fans lined up to meet the idol group, going down the line one by one, and the smiles on the boys’ faces made her smile too. It made her happy to see them happy, and she knew the girls around her felt the same way. Her hand was tapped as a girl in the row ahead of her asked her to record her interactions with the boys, and she readily agreed. Once that girl was up on stage, she zoomed in and recorded her interaction with the eight idols. In return, once it was her turn to line up with her album to meet the boys, the other girl offered to record her going down the line and talking with the boys, to which she quickly thanked her for offering and y/n handed her her phone. She lined up on the side of the stage, nervousness growing as there were only a few girls still in between her and Changbin, the first of the eight boys she’d meet today.
Soon, she sat in the chair in front of the rapper, smiling at him as she said hello, shaking slightly due to her nerves.
“Hi, it’s nice to meet you!” She told him, smile as bright as the sun.
“Ahh, nice to meet you too!” He said, taking her album as she handed it to him, opening to one of his pages. “Where are you from?” He asked, noticing her nerves and the slight shake to her body, determined to get her less nervous.
“I’m from Canada. I flew here and arrived yesterday afternoon.” Y/n told him.
“Oh wow! Really? That’s so far away!” He was surprised she flew that far for their fansign, he even applauded her for it, to which she shied away, hiding her face.
“No, no hiding!” He teased her, and she slowly pulled her hands away, looking at him with red cheeks.
“Is it cold back in Canada?” Changbin asked.
“It’s not too bad, I guess? But I prefer it here where it’s warm and sunny.” She told him, replying to his question.
“Ohhh, you like warm.” He said, English skills finally breaking down a bit.
“I love the warmth. I’m always too cold, see?” She said to him, showing her hands which were slightly pink at the tips.
He grabbed her hands gently, rubbing them to try and warm them up. He knew it was chilly in there, but not to where one of their fans was becoming very cold. He was so concerned for her, almost abnormally so, but he chalked it up to just caring for their stays.
“Oh no, you’re so cold! It’s too cold here.” He said after rubbing her hands for a couple moments.
“Oh no, it’s okay, Changbin-oppa. My fingers and toes are always like this, no matter how warm it is. Just my body being bad, that’s all.” She corrected him gently, wanting to ensure he knew it wasn’t the room, it was just her.
And sadly, that is where her time with the rapper ended, with her being moved onto the next man, who was the Hwang Hyunjin, who was waiting for her to move down in front of him, which made her blush intensify.
“Hello Hyunjin!” She said, voice a little on the higher side.
“Hello, Stay!” He said, smiling at her. “What’s your name?” He asked as he received her album, moving to sign one of his pages that she had marked.
“My name is y/n! And we’re born in the same year, Hyunjin-ssi.” She informed him, slightly swaying in order to calm herself.
“Oh? We are? That’s amazing! What month?” He further questioned her, a slight surprise showing on his face.
“I’m a September baby, so I’m younger than you by a couple months.” She said, watching him sign her album.
He looked back up at her, his beauty was ethereal, and it took her breath away to see him this close up. He reached out to grab her hands, both of them pulling away slightly and flinching at the zap of electricity. It couldn’t have been more than static electricity, but it felt almost like a connection of sorts. Both of them waved it off, not thinking much of it, but inside, their beta and omega knew what had just happened, and were berating them for ignoring it.
“Your name is really pretty, I forgot to tell you.” He said earnestly, his eyes feeling like they were staring right into her soul, and she could see so many emotions floating around in those captivating eyes. She couldn't keep eye contact with him and looked away, down at her lap to avoid his gaze.
“Thank you, Hyunjin-ssi.” She said, still unable to look him in the eyes.
“Stay doesn’t have to use -ssi, call me Hyunjin, please?” He begged her, leaning down on the table to try and get her attention, to which she looked up at him, giggling at his position.
“What are you doing?” She said between giggles.
“I just wanted-” He started, but was interrupted by staff ushering her to move onto the next member, to Hyunjin’s dismay. He wanted to talk with her all day.
Seungmin was next, and his gentle smile caused her to continue to smile in return, her smile not dimming, but becoming softer.
“Hello, it’s nice to meet you.” He said, much calmer than the others, but you could see that he was just as excited to meet their fans as the other boys were.
“Hello Seungmin, it’s nice to meet you too.” She said, telling him her name afterwards, so that he had a name to sign the album with.
They made small talk as he signed, and then continued on afterwards. Y/n told him how far she travelled to be here today, and then expanded on her home as Seungmin asked her more questions about where she was from. She tells him that no matter how long the journey was, she wouldn’t have missed being here, and missing the chance to talk to them, for anything else in the world.
To this, his face is filled with awe and wonder, always surprised at what lengths their fans go to in order to see them live or to meet them. She then talks about what she loves about him, and how she enjoys seeing his interactions with the other boys, and how his voice is angelic. She just about showers him in compliments, until her time with the vocalracha member is up.
He waves goodbye to her and hands her album onto Jeongin, who’s next in line. He smiled at her as she slid over into the chair in front of the maknae, who, having heard her name from when she told his fellow member, quickly signed her album, before reaching out to grab her hands, squeezing them. This shocked y/n slightly, not expecting how intense the maknae was right then and there. He however, just felt drawn to her, like a moth to a flame, and wanted to be in contact with her. His alpha encouraged his actions, and the man himself didn’t question his alpha, and just continued looking at her with a smile on his face.
“Hi, Stay!” He said excitedly, to which y/n replied back, asking how he was doing.
“I’m doing better now that I get to talk to you.” He answered her, winking at the end and slightly flirting, to which he got lightly smacked by Minho.
Y/n wasn't faring well with the intense nature of the supposed “baby bread” youngest member, and it clearly showed on her face, which was turning, in Jeongin’s eyes, a lovely shade of pink, and her eyes were wide as she stared at him.
“You look so cute, Stay.” He complimented her, to which she blushed harder. His grin grew as he watched her blush intensify, and to which his alpha almost purred in contentment.
He continued teasing her, to which her responses were almost nonsensical, until the staff member became her savior by telling Jeongin that she had to move to the next member. Minho, being impatient, grabbed her hands from his fellow member and pulled her over to the chair in front of his space at the table, grabbing her album afterwards. Jeongin pouted at his hyung’s actions, watching you move over to the next chair. He only stopped overtly watching her when the next Stay sat down in front of him, his attention turning to them.
“Hello Lino!” Y/n said, a smile still stuck on her face.
“Hello Stay.” He said, shaking their hands as he had yet to let go. “Do you have any pets?” He asked, finally but almost reluctantly pulling his hands away so he could sign her album.
“I do! I have a bunny, named Jack.” She told him, telling him how she got him, and about all of her bunny’s little quirks.
He stopped signing her album just to look up at her and watch her talk. He was oddly drawn to her, and observed her as she talked. Her smile was extraordinary and how he wanted to never see her smile fade away, he felt pulled in by her, and he knew it wasn’t her scent, it couldn’t have been since he could see the scent blockers on her skin. But she almost called out to him, to his alpha. He internally questioned if there was something more to that feeling or if it was only just because she was similar to his omegas, to Jisung and Felix. Her outfit clearly took inspiration from them, and she seemed similar in personality, so maybe that was the culprit behind this pull he was feeling.
He realized that he hadn’t finished signing her album, and hurried to do so as he lightly chatted with her, mostly about their own pets and how troublesome they were at times. Sadly, that came to an end when she was pointed to move onto the next idol, who happened to be Felix.
The Australian man looked at her, having the silent realization that this was the girl he ran into the day prior, and did his best to push what happened out of his mind, since he hadn’t told anyone what had happened, and from the lack of reaction on her part, she didn’t know that they had met yesterday.
“Hello Felix!” She said, smiling from ear to ear at meeting her almost birthday twin.
“Hello! How are you? Also, your outfit is so cute! I love it!” He replied, a grin on his face.
“I’m well, and I’m very excited to be here!” She told him, her cheeks hurting as she had smiled since meeting Changbin. “Thank you! I tried to combine your and Han’s styles, and I hope I was able to do both your styles justice.” She explained.
“You did! So, how old are you?” He questioned, taking the time to sign her album.
“I’m your age, actually.” She confessed, as he looked up in slight shock.
“Wow, really?” He said.
“Yup! Actually you and I aren’t too far apart in age, birthday wise. I share a birthday with one of your members.” She replied.
“Wait, that means-” He started, before she interrupted him.
“Yeah, I do have a birthday twin within your group.” She giggled and nodded as she confirmed his thoughts.
“Oh wow! That’s so cool!” He told her.
“Yeah, it’s what made me a Stay actually. Well, and your Miroh era.” She confessed to him, blushing slightly.
They continued chatting, with Felix inquiring more about her life, and how long she’s been into K-pop among other things. Felix’s omega was practically purring at having this pretty girl’s attention only on him, plus that they got to see her again after Felix stupidly ran away yesterday.
Meanwhile, next to Felix, Minho was trying to concentrate on the Stay in front of him, but his mind and eyes kept wandering over to y/n and Felix. He couldn’t help but listen in on their conversation as he tried to keep chatting with the fan in front of him. That pull in his chest still hadn’t disappeared, and he kept questioning what exactly was drawing him to you. His alpha, however, knew exactly what was happening and was very happy about it, Minho could tell that much. His alpha kept talking about how Felix and the girl got along so well, and look how pretty they both were, and ‘Wouldn’t they look pretty together in their nest?’ Minho had to physically force himself to look away from the two of them, and push to only focus on the Stay in front of him.
During this, the two people who were the subject of Minho’s thoughts and glances were saddened when staff told them it was time for y/n to move on. Felix grabbed her hand, pleading with her not to go, to the girl’s laughter and her insistence that she must move on, to Han finally interjecting and reaching out for her hand and pulling her to the next chair.
“I heard you had a birthday twin in Stray Kids?” He inquired immediately, wanting to know.
“Hello Han. Yes I do.” She giggled at his impatience. “I’m birthday twins with you, actually. Down to the year.” She told him.
Hell yeah!” He exclaimed as Felix overheard, the Aussie pouting at how close he was to sharing a birthday.
Y/n saw Felix’s pout, and giggled as she looked over at him. He saw her giggling and playfully glared at her, only making her giggle more, which Han did as well when he saw what was making the girl in front of him giggle.
Han quickly signed his page in the album, before focusing all his attention on the girl in front of him. He wanted to know more about his birthday twin, and to learn if they had anything else in common. They did have quite a few things in common, their style being one of those things, anxiety was a second, and they also had quite similar personalities. This made the quokka a very happy man, and his omega wanted to steal the Stay away and keep them and Han was agreeable with that notion. A birthday twin to share the fun with? Yes please.
They joked about how maybe this was fate, and maybe this was why she was drawn to the group in the first place, with y/n admitting that their shared birthday is what made her interested in the first place. Han smiled, with a blush on his face at that confession. That she had found the group and gotten interested because of Felix, but was more interested that they both shared a birthday. Plus, she won the chance to be here and meet them, which was even more amazing.
As engrossed as they both were in their conversation, Chan finally leaned over and interrupted them, to inform her that it was their turn to chat. Han grabbed her hand, shaking them as he thanked her for coming and talking with him, and that she’d have to remember to wish him a happy birthday when their birthday came, to which she promised she would. She reluctantly let go of his hands, and moved over to sit in front of Chan, realizing that her time with the boys would end shortly.
“Hello there, sorry to interrupt your fun with Hannie.” He apologized, looking truly sorry to have stopped their conversation. He truly was sad that he had to do so, they loved their fans, and Jisung looked so happy as he chatted with her, and his alpha almost screamed his content at how happy this girl had made his members.
“It’s okay, I understand, don’t worry Chan.” She told him, understanding clearly heard in her voice.
He smiled at how understanding she was, starting up a conversation with her about what she was going to do while in Seoul. Inside, his alpha was trying to gain control over him, an overwhelming need coming over him to grab her and scent her, rules be damned. He wasn’t alone in this feeling, as y/n had been feeling a pull this entire time as she went down the line, but it was stronger right in front of the leader of the group, and her omega wanted nothing more than to sink into this man’s arms right here and now. She shook off her omega while he pushed away those feelings, one thinking it was just her being delusional and having read too much fanfic, while the other just chalked it up to his alpha reacting to the fact that it was a pretty girl in front of him right now.
They continued their chat like neither of them were experiencing anything, and she asked him about places to visit in Australia should she ever get to visit, and he turned it on her and asked about places to visit in Canada when they get the chance to travel there. Both parties enjoyed the conversation, almost feeling as if they were just two friends chatting, instead of idol and fan. They talked about animals as well, both of them gushing about their own animals and telling a couple of funny stories about them.
At last, y/n’s time with the boys was finally over, and it was at this point Chan realized he had never signed her album. Signaling to the staff to let him sign the album quickly before she had to leave, he did so. On a whim, and what he swears was his alpha’s idea, and not fully his, under his signature, he added his number. Quickly closing the book, he handed it to her, and waved to her as she left the stage and returned to her seat, focusing on the next fan to sit in front of him.
Y/n returned to her seat, feeling saddened after leaving the stage and the boys. She shrugged it off, just like she had with the rest of the odd feelings she’s had today and yesterday. After she got back to her seat, one of the girls in the row behind her that she had made friends with, asked her to film her meetings with the boys, and she agreed. After that, the girl in the row in front of her that filmed her interactions handed her phone back, and y/n thanked her for filming as the other girl waved off her thank yous.
Soon enough, it was the girl behind her turn to chat with the boys, and y/n started filming as she went up on stage. She noticed during her filming, that the boys glanced up in her direction a couple times, or at least her general direction, she doubted their gaze was on her specifically. She dutifully continued filming, trying to get the best video she could for the girl.
Y/n was wrong about the boys not looking right in the crowd for her. They really couldn’t help themselves, looking at her when she didn’t notice, and every time they had the chance. They had never felt so pulled towards someone like this, not since they all found each other. Y/n was feeling the same way, it almost felt like there was a rope between her and the boys, and it was trying to pull her in closer. She once again brushed it off as wishful thinking, and maybe her delusions of wanting the boys to notice her, as every Stay did. Plus, she probably just enjoyed talking to them so much that she wanted to talk with them again.
Finally, the girl she was filming for left the stage, and y/n ended the recording, handing the phone back to her once the other girl returned to her seat. She watched as the final rows got their chance to see and talk with the boys, and once everyone was back in their seats, the boys came out from behind the tables, and started goofing off again. There was a portion set aside for photos of the boys, and of course they were absolutely adorable during it. And then they decided a couple dance relays of S-Class were in order, and a part switch dance to S-Class as well, which went as well as anyone could expect. A.k.a, it was a bit of a disaster, with the boys not knowing each other's places nearly as well as they knew their own. Though, we did get to see Felix do Minho’s parts, which was amazing and everyone in the room loved it.
Before anyone knew it, the fansign was coming to an end, with the boys sadly saying goodbye to the fans. Y/n didn’t want it to end, but as they were ushered back out of the room after the boys had left the stage, she reluctantly left. She was in tears leaving the building, and felt a great sadness at leaving, and so did her omega. She wasn’t quite sure why she reacted so heavily, but as she walked back to the hotel, her emotions only grew. Because of this, she sped up her pace, wanting to disappear into her hotel room and cry in private, not wanting others to see her like this.
Once she was back in her hotel room, she locked the door, immediately taking off her shoes and any accessories, before crawling into her makeshift nest that still smelt of sadness from that morning. She let herself fall apart, crying as she curled into a ball. She wasn’t sure why she was so sad, she really wasn’t sure, but she could feel that her omega was really hurting. She cried herself to sleep, falling into a nightmare, where it was the opposite of her dream from the night before. The boys were the opposite of their sweet selves, and were hurling anything and everything negative about herself at her, and all she could do was sit there and cry as they did so.
Being shocked out of her nightmare, she sat up as she woke up, her chest heaving as she tried to regulate her breathing. She managed to do so after a couple of minutes, and trying to get her mind off of how hurtful her nightmare was, she reached for her phone.
She found the video of her interactions with the boys, and started watching it. As she watched it, she realized just how different her interactions with the boys were from the ones she had filmed for others and watched herself. They seemed much more intimate in a way, with how touchy a lot of the boys were with her. They were so much more emotive and interactive with her, it felt a little abnormal after the fact. She must have been so happy to meet them that none of it felt off to her, and really looking back, it still didn’t feel too odd, just a bit more intimate than the other fans’ interactions. She wondered why she was so different, and why her, over everyone else.
This pushed her to look through her album, and she stopped at Chan’s signature. Underneath his name, there was a number, along with a short message to text him. This had to be a joke, there was no way she was living the y/n life right now. She felt as if she had stepped into a fanfiction, because why else would Bang fucking Chan have given her, out of all people, his number?
She decided to fuck it and texted the number he gave her, and he almost immediately responds.
‘Who are you?’ He demanded.
‘I’m y/n, you gave me this number in my album that you signed today.’ She replied.
‘What did we talk about today then?’ He asked her.
‘A little bit of everything, honestly, but we did talk about our pets. You talked about Berry, and I talked about my bunny Jack and how troublesome he is.’ Y/n told him.
She also decided to send him a picture of herself, holding open his page of the album as she sat next to a clock to prove the time. Chan believed her, and told her as such. She then asks him why he decided to give her his number.
‘I watched your actions with the others and myself, and something about you and all of our interactions intrigued me. I felt there was something more to it all, and wanted to get to know you better.’ He explained, to which she was relieved it wasn’t a trick, but was also confused about how she intrigued him. She voiced those thoughts and to which he reassured her that he wasn’t tricking her, nor should she be confused about how she was interesting to him, because he honestly found her interesting from the start of their conversation at the fanmeet.
He further explained that the other members had no idea about what he had done, and he hadn’t planned on saying anything to them, unless y/n had reached out and told him it was okay to do so. Though that didn’t stop them from discussing her in the vans on the way back to the dorm, nor did it stop their discussion from spilling over into their group chat. He told her as much, and she was surprised to have made that much of an impression on them. Chan reassured her that their interactions with her were very memorable, from what he could gleam from the others’ conversations. What he didn’t tell her was that Minho had noticed Chan’s behavior, and signaled to the pack alpha that they would be talking after they arrived back at the dorm.
Soon enough the boys arrived back at the dorm, and the leader had to say goodbye for now to y/n, Minho staring him down as they walked into the building and then the elevator. The other alpha grabbed his hand as soon as the elevator doors opened, and led him through the front door of the apartment, and straight to the Aussie man’s room.
“Who are you texting? And why am I sure it’s that girl from the fansign?” Minho interrogated him, not leaving him a second to talk.
“You’re not wrong. I gave her my number.” Chan confessed.
Taglist: open!
#skz x reader#bang chan x reader#changbin x reader#felix x reader#han x reader#hyunjin x reader#lee know x reader#lee minho x reader#han jisung x reader#seungmin x reader#jeongin x reader#bang chan#lee know#lee minho#seo changbin#hwang hyunjin#han jisung#lee felix#kim seungmin#yang jeongin#a/b/o#a/b/o dynamics#a/b/o au#skz#stray kids x reader#stray kids#skz series
262 notes
·
View notes