#my dumbass needs to stop forgetting to post

[mwagneto]

hungarian/nomadic magyar tumblr circa 998AD dashboard simulator

🏞️ vándor-ló-979 Follow

not yall still spreading emese's foundation myth??? she literally claims she fucked a bird????? like either she's lying or she cheated and she's trying to cover it up or well. i dont even want to consider the third option

🪺 magánügyek Follow

tengri forbid women do anything???

735 notes

🦅 szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow

okay im sick of the discourse let's do this.

8,572 notes

🐎 istván-rovására Follow

that took so long lmao -> !!!!!!!∧◇ᛏ⋈∧

481 notes

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

i'm so serious rn if you support """istván""" in any way just unfollow and block me. we do NOT need him or his dumbass god and what he's been doing to our people to spread his religion is shameful.

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

btw we all know your real name is vajk stop larping as a christian it's EMBARRASSINGGGG

✝️ esztergom-örökké Follow

love seeing my mutuals reblogging this /s anyway op has multiple posts on their blog supporting quartering and human sacrifice. in case you were wondering. anyway stand with István

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

1) we dont even do human sacrifices, are you fucking stupid??? show me ONE post where i talk about that. 2) are you seriously forgetting that your bestie istván LITERALLY QUARTERED HIS UNCLE?????

#sorry to put this dumbass on the dash😭 dont even engage just block them #ur not making it up the tree of life lmao #discourse

3,264 notes

🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow

friendly reminder that just because you're white passing doesn't mean you're not a real magyar!! people with mixed parents are just as valid <3

🏇 attila-népe Follow

cranky coz ur ancestors decided to mix with the europeans arent you

🧺 lemezelő Follow

isnt your girlfriend literally frankish????

🏇 attila-népe Follow

you had to have done some serious stalking to find that💀 and first of all i didn't have a choice, my parents picked the tribe, and second of all she's not my "girlfriend" i got her via ritual kidnapping (WITH consent. before anyone gets weird)

🌐 a-kiber-kovács Follow

Couldn't you have kidnapped another magyar woman? Or someone from another mongoloid tribe?

🔅 hadúrsimp Follow

ohh sure so now human pet guy is gonna chime in to advocate for the kidnapping of our women while being lowkey racist. what are you even doing on nomadblr????

🌅 bolygó-kárpáti Follow

what the fuck happened to my post

19,276 notes

🪔 rakabonciás Follow

for the nth time, you're only a true shaman if you were born with teeth OR with extra fingers OR in the sac. the rest of you are faking & we can tell.

🦅szél-könnyű-szárnyán-szállj Follow

okay people keep spreading this but this is literally just wrong?? like congrats on the 6 fingers op im glad u and Little Golden Father have a special connection (genuinely) but like. táltos and sámán and mágus and garabonciás and javas etc are all different things with completely different requirements and life paths which you should definitely know if you're claiming to be one?? especially since your post says shaman but you're listing the criteria for a táltos, and your username looks like a play on garabonciás so. which is it🤔 maybe get your facts in order before trying to gatekeep

anyway don't listen to op!! your connection to the Upper World is yours alone and you're the best judge of what the Fathers and Mothers want your path in life to be!!

646 notes

🛐 mea-culpa Follow

It breaks my heart that the majority of my people still refuse to see the One True God and insist on sticking to their pagan spirits. I fear that when judgement day comes, we will all be wiped out thanks to their foul godless ways.

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

how tf am i godless when i literally have dozens of gods? little mothers and little fathers are in everything all around us & it must suck ass to live in a world where you're not surrounded by the small gods that inhabit everything. manifesting that the fene and the guta tag team beat your ass tonight

🔅 hadúrsimp Follow

hadúr will literally strike op down personally. he told me himself. whispered it to me sweetly even

🐴 csillagösvény Follow

while i agree with you, i feel like you might also have ulterior motives, nomadblr user hadúrsimp

#but live your truth! doubly so on the posts of these freak repressed bible lovers. meanwhile on the #COOL side of magyarhood we walk around butt ass naked!!! op have fun never experiencing joy ever again tho #discourse

198 notes

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

posting from an alt so i don't get cancelled but lowkey i'm starting to think koppány was right.... maybe this christianity thing isn't gonna work out after all

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

WRONG BLOG

👑 sanctus-stephanus Follow

THIS WAS A JOKE. IGNORE THIS

🪺 magánügyek Follow

ISTVÁN????????????? 💀

[takonei]

I like Signus he's a funny man. thing. eldritch horror whatever. Make it human-ish like the rest

And now that I have the whole distortion gang I can put those guys in situations <3

(Some additional details about Signus's design under the cut!)

[yokelfelonking]

Post 9/11 Trivia

Most folks on this site were either children on September 11, 2001, or weren’t even born yet.  But America went crazy for about a year afterwards.  Here’s some highlights that I remember that might not be in your history books:

There was national discussion on whether or not Halloween should be canceled because…fuck if I know why.  After planes crashed into buildings in NYC it follows that 6-year-olds in Iowa shouldn’t be allowed to dress up like Batman and ask their neighbors for candy, I guess.  (Halloween wasn’t canceled, by the way.)

On a similar note, people asked if comedy - any sort of comedy - was appropriate anymore, ever.

People sold shitty parachutes to suckers “in case your building gets attacked and you have to jump out the window.” There were honest-to-God news reports warning people not to jump out of the window with shitty mail-order parachutes because they wouldn't work.

As a follow-up to the attacks, someone mailed anthrax to some prominent politicians and news anchors - you know, famous people - along with some badly-written notes about “you cannot stop us, death to America, Allah is good” and after that every time some random dumbass found a package in the mail they didn’t recognize they thought that the terrorists were targeting them, too.

Everyone was similarly convinced that their town was going to be the next target, even if they were a little town in the middle of nowhere. "Our town of Bumblefuck, South Dakota (population 690) has the largest styrofoam pig statue west of the Mississippi! Terrorists might fly planes into that too! It's a prime target!"

People started taping up their windows and trying to make their houses or apartments airtight out of fear of chemical and biological attacks. There were news reports warning people that turning your house into an airtight box was a bad idea because, y'know, you need air to breathe.

"[X] supports terrorism!" and “if we do [X], the terrorists win!” were used as arguments for everything.  "Some rich Arab you never heard of donated to his organization that backs Hamas which backs al-Queda, and also owns stock in a holding company that has partial ownership of the Pringles company, so if you eat Pringles you're supporting terrorism!" "The terrorists want to tear down our freedoms and our way of life and rule us through fear! Eating what you want is one of our freedoms as Americans! If you're afraid to eat Pringles, the terrorists win!" (I promise you that this sort of argument is in no way hyperbole.) (This argument is how Halloween was saved, by the way.  “If we cancel Halloween, the terrorists win!”)

People worked 9/11 into everything, and I mean everything, whether it was appropriate or not.  If you went to the grocery store the tortilla chips would remind you to support the troops on the packaging. Used car sales would be dedicated to our brave first responders. You couldn't wipe your ass without the toilet paper rolls reminding you to never forget the fallen of 9/11, and again, this is not hyperbole. My uncle, who lived in Ohio and had never been to New York except to visit once in the 70′s, died of a stroke about 8 months after 9/11, and the priest brought up the attacks at the eulogy.

On a similar local note, on the day of 9/11, after the towers went down, gas stations in my home town immediately jacked up gas prices.  The mayor had the cops go around and force them to take them back down.  I doubt any of that was legal.

Before 9/11, Christianity in America - and religion in general - was on a downward swing, with reddit-tier atheism on the upswing. Religion was outdated superstition from a bygone age. The day after 9/11? Every single church was PACKED. (This wasn't a bad thing, but the power-hungry on the Evangelical Right saw this as a golden opportunity to grab power and influence.)

EDIT: By Popular Demand - Freedom Fries. I initially left these off because they came a couple years after the initial panic and most people thought they were kind of absurd (and I don't recall anyone really going along with it other than maybe some local diners here and there). France didn't want to get involved in our world policing so some folks were like "TRAITORS!" and wanted to call french fries "Freedom Fries" instead, so as to stick it to the French.

Besides dumb shit like that…it’s really hard to overstate how completely the national mood and character changed in the span of a day, or how much of the current culture war is a result of the aftermath. (9/11 was the impetus for the sharp rise in power of the Evangelical Right, who made themselves utterly odious and the following backlash helped the rise of the current Progressive Left, for instance.)

And if all of this seems batshit...well, it was. But I want you to think for a moment how people react today over even trivial shit. People send death threats over children's cartoons. They call for blood if the maker of a video game had an opinion they don't like. If someone made a racist joke a decade ago when they were a teenage edgelord, folks will go after people who even associate with them. "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ALL THE HARM THEY'RE DOING!?"

Now take that same level of over-the-top histrionics and apply it to the unprecedented event of passenger planes crashing into crowded buildings in America's most populous city and killing thousands of people all at once. "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THAT WE WERE ATTACKED!?"

[lovetei]

Okay, this have been on my mind for a while now…

So! MC in the manga is a sheep (get turn into a sheep because they aren’t familiar with the magic? Idk). I was just wondering that at the end of the exchange programme how would the boys react to Mc’s “true form”

This is such an interesting thing to write 🖤

By the way, this is another request stuck in my drafts, I promise I'll try to make up for it and post more :')

--------------------------------------------------

Their reaction to Sheep MC changing into their human form at the end of the exchange program

Warnings: Slightly suggestive, no proofreading, wrong grammar, spelling errors, kind of long

Versions: Demon brothers, Side Characters

Links: Masterlist

--------------------------------------------------

LUCIFER

It was the end of the exchange program and he's seeing you off

A large portal behind your back

For you, it might be the portal that will lead you to the freedom and whatever normality this program took away from you for a whole year

The portal that you've been waiting for

But for him, it's nothing but a spiral of magic that takes away the only comfort he has

The comfort that he seek for

And his twisted heart aches whenever he remembers it

But he hides it off with a smile and a wave

He waved at you one last time before you turned around

"Uhm... I feel weird-"

What?

The extreme feeling of despair left his body for a second and was covered with confusion

That soon turned into worry as your sheep form completely fell to the ground

The noises you're making is not normal and they're all panicking because they've never heard of it before

And the fact that you started glowing didn't ease their mind.

Could it be that some higher demon planted some spell inside of you?

IS THAT SPELL SUCCESFUL?!-

MC..?

He looked at you shock

No, more like-

He looked at your new form, shocked.

The way your naked body is laying on the ground right in front of him...

Right in front of them..?

He can't help but sigh and thought that, everything would have been fine, perfect even, if you turned into this form in front of him

But no, you just have to turn into your original self in front of everyone

Now he can't even embrace you.

All he did was take his coat off and throw it to your body as his face flush red.

You turned around to look at them as you clutch his coat with that adorable expression before you run off and enter the portal

He's left there, shocked and speechless

He didn't know what the hell just happened

But what's he's sure of is that he's going to get you back

And you're going to show that expression to him one more time

But that time, it will just be the two of you, alone.

MAMMON

This man is bawling his eyes out

His original plan is to watch you leave as he cries and once you're gone he will walk it off like a real man, with tear stains of course.

He set his mind to it, gambling for the whole week after you leave so that he can forget you

Even for just a moment

But no,

You won't even let him have the peace of mind

Or leave him with a nice memory

Instead your sheep body dropped to ground and made everyone think that you're about to die!

But you know what more you did?

You turned into a human!

Your human form!

Naked!

He went from 😭 -> 🤨 -> 😮 -> 😭 -> 😳 in a mere minute

He just stood there with a flushed face

A blushing dumbass who don't know what to do but watch as Lucifer threw his coat on you

And watch you run away with that cute expression, embarrassed expression on your face.

Gosh

You drive him insane

Now he's all fired up, willing to destroy the mortal world just to get you back in his arms.

LEVIATHAN

This one too is bawling his eyes out

While holding his camera of course

He's filming every part of this

He's standing there like "WAHHH MCCC! W-Wait is the angle r-right..? I need to capture how b-beautiful MC is..." while sobbing words out.

His hands are holding the camera shakily but the movement suddenly stopped when you said you feel weird...

His eyes shot open and his tears stopped

Are you okay..?

. . .

He's malfunctioning the moment you dropped to the ground and started to glow

And he malfunctioned even more when you turned into your human born, as naked as the moment you were born.

Now his sniper instincts came in and the camera is as focused as a laser

He's staring at you wide eyed, face as red as a tomato and his mouth agape

He doesn't know what's happening

But what he's sure of is that he needs to film it

Everything

The moment you grabbed Lucifer's coat and hugged it to cover yourself

And the moment you stood up and looked at them with that cute expression

But the moment you left, he hid the camera

This film is for his eyes only...

He's gonna need this for a 'project'...

And you know what else he needs?

Tissues.

SATAN

He's smiling everything off as he watches you leave

But you know deep down some anger is boiling

Considering how hot his pact mark is getting

Because, why do you have to leave..? Did he fail to satisfy your standards..?

He can't help but roll his eyes internally

But in the middle of his self talk, you spoke

"I kind of... Feel weird-"

And then you dropped to the ground and he's suddenly panicking

Any other feeling except for confusion flushed out of his body

He ran up to you immidiately but the light dimmed down and your naked body lay before him

He can't help stop in his tracks and just look at you and blush

Before he can even register anything, Lucifer's coat is already hugging your body

Which causes another wave of wrath to hit him

He just glared at Lucifer and saw that he's not even paying attention to him

He's looking at you

With a foreign expression in his face

So he also looked at you and...

Why the fuck did you have to look so majestic..?

You met his gaze and your face flushed before you ran out and entered the portal

He just remained still

Looking at the ground where you once sat

He can't move, he's shaking so much...

He feels like he's about to explode...

ASMODEUS

"WAHHH MCCC!" He whined out as he openly sobbed

He loves you so much!

Just why do you have to leave him!

He can't help but pout at you as you say your final goodbye

But what about him?

Why do you have to leave him too!

I mean it's understandable that you want to leave them because they're all such nuisances to you why him?!

He can't help it-

What do you mean you're feeling weird?

He's slowly walking to your direction

But you started to glow..?

Suddenly he's bearing his teeth expecting enemies around

Oh wait...

Oh...

You're...

Naked...

His mind is scrambled

He completely stopped working

And he'll probably be out of service for the next few days.

BEELZEBUB

He's probably standing there with Belphie in his arms

He's giving you his infamous puppy smile hoping that you'll give him what he wants

Hoping that you'll fall for it like the usual and ran up to him an dsay he's cute instead of leaving

But there's a part in his heart that knows you won't

He's sad and happy at the same time

He's happy because you'll finally live the way you do back then

But he's sad because you have to leave to do so...

Huh?

You're feeling weird..?

You're glowing, MC!

He's shaking Belphegor awake now

What's happening to you-

. . .

He'll be one of the most respectful and cover his eyes

But he's secretly peaking through the gaps

Your flushed face...

Looks so cute...

You look...

You looked delicious...

Just enough to eat...

Now he's hungry.

Hungry for something... New?

Something that includes you.

BELPHEGOR

He's awake actually

He watched everyone, he heard everyone gave their final speeches to you

But when you were about to leave

He forcefully shut his eyes and leaned on Beel

Hoping that his sin would take over and he fell into some deep slumber

But why of all times... Why isn't it cooperating..?

His brows are furrowed as he forces himself to sleep

But suddenly everyone dropped silent...

So you finally left?

Wha- why is Beel shaking him?-

MC?!

Why the fuck are you glowing now?!

No no no...

Is it the work of some demon?!

Who-

. . .

You're... Naked...

In front of everyone...

Haha...

Beel better hold him back or else he's about to run after you and do what his brothers can't

But he knows you won't like that.

So he clinged to Beel-

Haha...

Why do you look like that?!

That's his last thought before he ran and almost caught you but the portal closed

Immidiately.

"Hmm... What a shame~"

He'll make sure he'll catch you next time.

[astonmartinii]

insta au req about reader and charles being best friends and a rift comes between them because of his girlfriend(or whoever!!) and reader and max finally get together and she shades ferrari and charles purrrrr (if not i totally get it queen love u loads)

into the arms of another | max verstappen social media au

pairing: max verstappen x reader

after charles leaves her out in the cold, y/n falls into the arms of another.

part two part three

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, arthurleclerc and 506,823 others

tagged: charles_leclerc

yourusername: dumb and dumber: vacation edition

view all comments

user1: they're really just the definition of no thoughts behind the eyes

user2: it's crazy cause we all know you have to be smart to drive an f1 car and she has a literal degree in architecture but they are always in the most insane situations ever

charles_leclerc: that's my private jet don't call me dumb

yourusername: *rented, dumbass

liked by maxverstappen1

user3: they're friendship goals like perfect example of platonic soulmates and male and female friendship

arthurleclerc: so like what does a man need to do for a feature on your instagram?

yourusername: soz arth, step ur aesthetic up x

user4: oh to be besties with an f1 driver

user5: wait so like all the leclercs and their gfs went on this holiday, right?

user6: yeah arthur’s and lorenzo’s gfs have posted about being there

user5: so it’s kinda muggy that y/n refused to post the girls?

user6: not really she’s posted with the girls loads i think y’all just want an excuse to be mad at her

charles_leclerc

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55 and 1,231,907 others

charles_leclerc: summer spent with the best people

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user8: no y/n ....

user9: did yall see that tweet about the girl who met y/n in corsica when charles left her stranded on the beach to walk home on her own

user8: what ???

joristrouche: love you brother

charles_leclerc: best mate

user10: the vibes have shifted, the atmosphere is weird and the absence of y/n is the centre of it

user11: i fear i've seen this film before and y/n is defo getting iced out because charles in back in a relationship

user12: noooooo i thought he'd matured past that after the last time he fucked y/n off for a girlfriend

user13: babes please stop expecting so much from men

liked by yourusername

pierregasly: you look sunburnt calmar, did you leave it at home cause y/n isn't there to remind you?

charles_leclerc: she's here and i have been putting it on the sun just has it out for me

yourusername: i tried pierre, believe me

user14: well this is fucking awkward

user15: charles is not beating the allegations of forgetting about y/n while in a relationship LOL

maxverstappen1

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 1,034,667 others

maxverstappen1: simply lovely to win my home race again. the orange army never disappoint and i'm so thankful for all the support here this weekend

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user20: call me a conspiracy theorist BUT he thanked the orange army and the support separately i.e. Y/N Y/LN

user21: now you bitches usually jump to conclusions, but i'm hearing you this time

martingarrix: next set just gonna be super max on a two hour loop

maxverstappen1: i'll be there

user22: i'm sorry i'm new here why is y/n being in max's garage such a big deal? who is she? (gen.)

user23: y/n is charles' best friend, they've known each other since childhood and she's supported him through all levels of karting and single-seaters. though they haven't interacted too much in the public eye, max and y/n have known each other for as long as charles and max have. charles is a bit notorious for dumping y/n to the side for his girlfirend any time he's in a relationship and being inseparable once he's single again. after he ALLEGEDLY ditched her at a beach in corsica over the summer, y/n hasn't been seen with him or interacting with him online and was then in max's garage.

user24: maybe i'm messy but i genuinely want max and y/n to be together

yourusername: the red bull catering was defo worth breaking the cost cap

maxverstappen1: you're welcome any time

user25: can someone please check charles' pulse

landonorris: he looked like a cartoon with steam coming out of his ears earlier

user26: LANDO WHAT?

user27: tbf i think that's just a general side effect of driving the ferrari

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 542,987 others

yourusername: hard ball or soft serve

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user28: in my professional shadow identification opinion, i have deduced that it is in fact max verstappen

user29: ur so delusional (i believe you)

charles_leclerc: so that's who you've been getting our vanilla and chocolate cones with

yourusername: i'm not entertaining this argument over the internet charles you know where i live

liked by maxverstappen1

user30: she's so much better than me i'd rip him a new asshole right here right now

arthurleclerc: please come to dinner on sunday, carla can't come and i don't wanna fifth wheel plsssssss y/n

yourusername: sorry chickie i've already got plans but give mama my love

arthurleclerc: noooooo what could be better than mama's sunday lunch

yourusername: i promise i love those dinners but i've had enough experience seventh wheeling you guys and would love time with someone who loves me for me

liked by maxverstappen1

user31: yall i feel like i'm in the family group chat in this comment section this feels illegal to see

user32: max is so sly with the comments he's liking but that's MY petty king

f1

liked by yourusername, alexalbon and 1,304,783 others

tagged: maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc

f1: oops. charles leclerc takes championship leader max verstappen and himself out of the race at the first corner. the two did not mince their words, verstappen saying: "i tried to stay out of trouble but trouble came to me"

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user33: the way i RAN to twitter

user34: i'm not a verstappen fan but that quote goes so hard

user35: i'm all for leaving the drivers' personal lives alone but lord the tea is piping and sky cutting to y/n in max's garage? OOP

user36: no cause someone at sky has been watchign too much drive to survive because putting "charles' childhood friend" on her name banner as she's in max's garage was pure cinema

user37: charles be chatting mad shit for the man at fault

user38: leclerc drove into verstappen and perez and thought he'd manage to get out of the blame again LOL he's such a joker

user39: i think it's a good thing that y/n is skipping that dinner

user40: the way charles' gf wasn't even there this weekend and he was clearly looking for y/n in the garage

user41: the drama is too much for me to keep up with

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 603,487 others

yourusername: only 16 years in the making but we finally got a clue

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user42: i'm going into cardiac arrest

maxverstappen1: finally now i can comment freely about my unbelievably sexy, smart and hilarious girlfriend who i love and defo haven't pined over for ten years

yourusername: awwwww maxy, if it makes you feel better i've liked you for that long as well

user43: hmmmm idk this all seems a bit fake

yourusername: babes i still fancied him when he was a lanky, spotty teenager

arthurleclerc: i can confirm this

user44: the way y/n was always so nice and constantly hyping charles and his gf in their comments ... where's charles

user45: tbf she is dating his rival

user44: oh please we all know they never hated each other and have been good friends for years, charles is just being petty

danielricciardo: never thought i'd see the day when max would grow some balls and finally ask you out

yourusername: i thought you were meant to be some great wing man, i didn't see you helping

danielricciardo: i didn't want to get ran over by charles, no thank you

user46: i'm so sad i want bestie charles and y/n back

maxverstappen1

liked by yourusername, martingarrix and 1,409,875 others

maxverstappen1: some girls might want to ride a ferrari but mine wants to ride a red bull

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user47: THE CAPTION? THIS MAN IS SO UNHINGED

user48: mad max returns and in the form of shady instagram captions

yourusername: but you didn't even let me drive :(

maxverstappen1: babe i love you but you don't have a license and that's a very expensive car

user49: wait don't make me depressed didn't charles say in an interview ages ago that he was going to teach y/n to drive? did this never happen?

yourusername: sorry to ruin your day but i'm still illegal on the road

landonorris: so no photo credits? i watched you guys kiss for so long to get that shot

yourusername: i didn't hear you complaining on the day

maxverstappen1: let him be lonely in peace

landonorris: that's really not the save you think it is but thanks mate

user50: i am so happy that y/n is happy but the way charles can't be happy for her relationship like she always is for me is so sad to me

user51: i get that the charles and y/n situ is sad but she's clearly happy with max leave them be

fin.

note: hope you enjoyed my love, i hope this was kinda what you were envisioning, i'm happy with it but would be up for a part two if people want it lol xx

[noceurous]

get you back

summary: You hated that you loved Bucky Barnes, and he loved that you could not hate him.

warnings: mention of alcohol consumption, semi-drunkenness, carsex (18+), fingering, oral, swearing, smut, p in v, unprotected sex (don’t do it), fuckbuddy!bucky, dbf!bucky, implied age gap, mention of bad boyfriends (not bucky), using nicknames (princess, bunny) , slight degradation - nothing physical, some mention of food

minors dni

a/n: yes I AM BACK. please leave some comments/reblogs. thanks!!

A loud snap of fingers made you turn your head to him. “Are you even listening to me?” You sighed, pressing fingers on your temples to look like you were trying to remember.

No, you weren’t listening. You were thinking how that hot guy was about to give you his number, before James Buchanan Barnes a.k.a the actual devil, snatched you away. Leading you to his car without giving you a chance to say goodbye to the best body you have ever seen.

You. Hated. James. Bucky. Barnes.

“Something about… bunnies?” You shrugged as you turned your head back towards the road. Even though it was almost pitch black, you fought your urge to look at his profile under car’s lights. Even though he was angry and sleepless he looked better than all the guys you’ve ever known.

“Really? You are not even trying kid.” He said as he emphasized on the last word. He knew how much you hated the nickname.

“Stop calling me a kid. I’m not that young.”

“I will stop calling you a kid, when you stop acting like one. What were you thinking? What was the point of all that drinking? Get my attention or liver failure?”

The point was to get over your ex boyfriend finding someone before you did. You didn’t want to be the one who was stuck in an ended relationship.

You weren’t even prepared to the idea that he would start dating in a few months. His post just popped on your phone while you were scrolling through pictures on Instagram. Selfie with her, cheek to cheek and smiling like a true dumbass he is.

Getting ass drunk would be a nice way to forget. But you shouldn’t been too drunk to start texting and calling other people.

Especially calling the guy you hated the most. Because he would show up just in time, and yank you away from the guy you were flirting with.

You really shouldn’t have drunk texted your on-again-off-again hookup. Neighbour of your parents, a close friend of your dad.

It started just a few days after your heartbreak. You weren’t sure of how it started, but you remembered how it ended. In his bed, literally begging him for letting you cum as he pounded into you like an animal.

When you weren’t fucking, all you did was argue. Arguments about when to meet up or where to meet up… You hated meeting up in his place, so close to your parents. And he hated meeting only for an hour max.

You started fighting and decided to not meet up again. Either of you got tired of all the lies and secrets. It was you more than it was him. Bucky was always sure you would come back to him one way or another.

“Remind me not to call you again.” You huffed, resting your head on the window. Sun was about to shine in a few hours and all you wanted was to get into your bed. All you needed was forget the day and move on.

“Sure your parents would be thrilled to know their daughter would end up in jail for DUI.” You turned your neck so fast that it hurt.

“I wasn’t going to drive the car!”

“You getting into car of a drunk idiot is stupid enough too!”

“Stop acting like you are my dad! He was fucking hot, and he told me his place was really close.”

“What made you believe in him? I know what that kind of guy thinks. It is only getting you to the bed. You would be considered lucky if he bothered to call you the next day.”

“So? What made you think I am not okay with it?” You saw all the blood rushing to his cheeks, decorating them with a soft pink hue.

“Okay...” He said trying to not go any further with that discussion.

You dropped your shoulders, when you saw how his grasp on wheel tightened and his jaw clenched. If you didn’t know him that well, you would say he was offended.

Whether it was because of anger towards him or how tired you were. You didn’t say anything back but leant your seat back to at least sleep for the rest of the ride.

“Oh no princess, you are definitely not sleeping.” He said just before he slapped your thigh. Small ‘Hey!’ fell from your lips. It was fair to expect him to snap and say you crossed a line.

You yanked your leg away from his grasp. He shut you up before you could say anything back. “You made me get all this way three in the morning. Ofcourse there would be consequences.”

“I didn’t ask you to come.” You said as you rubbed your thigh.

“You sent me a picture of you lifting your skirt and texted all those things you want to do with me. But when I come to pick you up, I saw you on the lap of some dickhead.”

“I was horny. We’ve decided to stop with fooling around. Life moves on James.” As you finished the sentence, his foot stepped on the pedal so quick that he had to use his arm to stop you from falling forward.

“Get in the back of the car.”

“James, I’m tired.”

“Get in the back, or I will make you bunny.” You didn’t said anything back. Bucky never called you bunny, if he didn’t have something on his mind. You knew better than to take the risk of getting him angrier.

You rolled your eyes before unfastening your seatbelt. He caught the sight of your underwear as you bent over to move through the gap between the seats. Even though Bucky saw your pink thong, you acted like you had the upper hand.

“Take off your skirt.” He said before coming next to you. He almost yanked off the door before squishing you on the backseat.

He pulled you by your legs, making you lie down. The cold leather of the seats caused goosebumps on your skin. That and you knew what he was capable of when he was angry.

And he was pissed.

“Not so tired ha, bunny?” His large hands wandered along your legs, moving slowly towards your hips.

A loud noise of your gulp echoed in your brain. You could get used to that view. You legs hooked to his shoulders. His charming face inches over your lucky thong.

“Tell me again bunny.” He said as his eyes locked on your figure under his, trying not to smirk at the wet patch on your thong.

“Tell you what?” You asked. Blinking at him with nothing else on your mind.

“Tell me again the last thing you told me before breaking up with me. So I would not have my way with you.”

“Uhm...” He started kissing on the top of your thighs. Index finger was tracing your slit over the thong.

“We can’t keep doing this and not expect one of us getting hurt. Ah-“ He bit inside of your thigh, sucking a gentle bruise. “James.”

He didn’t listen to you. If he ever did that was not it definitely.

“I’m listening. Continue.” Kisses, soft bites started decorating your body.

His hands placed next to your waist. His teeth brushed along the band of your thong. You wanted to raise your hips. But the way he looked up at you, the darkness in his eyes, made you stop.

You licked your lips, closing your eyes to concentrate. “We continue lying to our close ones and soon enough the lies would get out of—“ You stopped as he curled his finger like a hook to pull down your thong.

He mumbled something that you were sure was Russian as he got close to your heat. His eyes looked into your eyes. You knew he was daring you to stop.

If you stop I’ll stop too bunny.

He didn’t need to speak for you to understand.

“—hands. Lies get out of our hands. It is too risky and it does not worth it. We both know that this affair does not take LONG!”

He licked a stripe over your slit. As his cold fingers separated your folds. He loved to torture you like this.

“I don’t want any of us to get hurt.” You manage to finish your speech as you felt the familiar tingles build up.

The tip of his tongue flicked your clit and you had to hold on to something, his hair, to stop your thighs to close around his head.

“See this is where you are wrong, bunny. There isn’t any chance where you can hurt me...” He said as his fingers collected some of your juices, raising them to his lips. “Unless you try to neglect me of your sweet nectar.” He sucked his fingers clean, you heard a tiny ‘hmm’ as his fingers touched his tongue.

He raised his head to look at you when he was circling around your weeping hole. “Answer this, do you want to hurt me bunny?” He wanted to make you weep as much as your pussy.

“N-no. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Then why you try to break things off?” The tip of his finger slowly pushed into your whole. He pulled it back before you could enjoy this. “Are you going to try and break things off again?” Another question he didn’t need to hear its answer to. He could read it from your tearful eyes and slight pout. “Oh bunny.” He whispered to himself, pride filling his chest.

His finger went back to circling around your hole as he used another one to toy with your clit. You could not stop yourself from curling your toes and try to pull him closer.

That arrogonat smirk on his face made a comeback. “Are you going to flirt with other guys who I’m sure does not even know what a clit is?” You shook head your again and he pressed his thumb.

“Fuck.” You said as you squirmed under his touch.

“Not the answer I am looking for. Do you want to try again bunny?”

“I—I’m not going to flirt with other guy a—and ohgod!” He pushed one inch of his finger inside curling the tip so it would reach your spot. You didn’t stop so he wouldn’t either. “I’m not going break things o—off.”

One more inch and you knew you would start to drip onto seats. Before you knew it, his mouth got back onto your clit. “James!” You said again as you pulled onto his locks.

“Shit! It’s only been a week but your pussy is crying out f’ me.” He said as he stood back up.

Your legs started shaking by the time. You whimpered at the lost contact of his fingers and lips. You also missed seeing him with your thighs wrapped around his head.

You knew if you touched yourself he would bite your fingers and deny you any sort of release. He quickly unfastened his belt and lowered his pants and boxers just low enough to take out his cock.

The tip was swollen red it was starting to leak some precum as he pressed it on your clit. “You are an attention whore bunny. It’s been only a week and I find you cosy with another guy. This deserves punishment don’t you think?”

“Please! I’ve been just trying to get your attention.” He smiled at your confession as he aligned his tip.

“Tell me you are mine and mine only. If you tell me that, I’ll give you what you want.”

“I’m yours James. I’m only yours, I do not belong to anybody else.” He started slowly push into you.

He leaned over you to fix the hair got on your face. His lips brushed along yours when you moaned as he found the spot. Your legs started to got down but he held them back. Pushing your bent knee to your chest as he started moving.

His hips started rutting into you slowly. “So pretty like this bunny. All spread out for me.” His tongue darted out from his lips to giving you a longing kiss. All teeth and tongue, full of lust and desire.

His large hands pulled down your strapless top, letting your tits out. His tongue clicked on top of mouth. “And thinking I would be sharing them with some dickhead.” He pushed into you hardly, making you jump into his arms.

“I don’t share bunny. Never.” You knew he meant more with those words.

Air inside the car was getting thick because of your panting. His fingers started playing with your nipples to get them erect as he held your tits together and started licking and sucking both of them.

“Not the teeth ah!” You tried to protest but he had already sunk his teeth into your extra-sensitive flesh. Sweet melody of your cries caused him to increase speed. He wanted more.

You yelped as you tried to find something to hold onto, best thing you found was the back of his shoulder as you pressed your nails against his skin. Bruises and scratches would be greeting both of you as first thing in the morning but it didn’t bother you as long as it came with pleasure.

“FuckFuckFuck!” Familiar coil started to form under your belly button, and you threw your head back. “James, please please…”

“Wanna cum bunny? Is that it? Mumblin’ because you are too close?” He said after detaching from your nipples with a pop. The little numb was all swollen and covered in saliva.

“Y-yes oh.” He slammed his hips onto yours with more force and stayed pressed into you. “Cum for me bunny. Cream all over my cock, fuck, you filthy girl, so eager for a release.” He said as he stopped your wriggling hips against is. “Humpin’ me like a cute lil’ bunny.”

Your hips started moving involuntarily, chasing after your release. He helped you with continuing the pound into you. You were chanting his name unable to form more coherent words or sentences.

“That’s it bunny. Cum for me come on! I’ve got you.” Just after he was finished your release hit you like a wave, causing you to lose all the control of your mind and body.

But he didn’t stop, he increased his pace. Chasing his own release using your numb body. “‘So pretty like this bunny. Makes me want to keep you all to myself.”

“I’m all yours.” You whispered, truly meant it. As you became used to the swell on your chest each time you look at him.

You were really his.

“Yeah? Are you going to take my cum? Let me breed you? I’m sure you would love that don’t you bunny? All swollen with my cum, looking at me with those pretty eyes. Fuck!”

“Yes, yes yes give it to me please.”

“Fucking take it. You little cumslut.” You felt the wetness and warmth of his release shoot right inside of you.

He stood there with your legs wrapped around his waist. Looking at your tired and ruined figure. Taking the sight in just before he slowly pulled out.

“We—“ You tried to speak up, trying not to show him how much you missed his cock inside you already.

As he was putting his clothes back on you once were aware of this situation.

There was no We, you two were just fucking whenever one of you needed some release. No matter what you do to get his attention, all you would get was his dick pounding into you. It won’t be his heart.

Sound of glove compartment’s being closed made you raise on your elbows to look at him.

You saw him take out some tissues to wipe off his leaking cum. “Are you on the pill?” You shook your head, you knew how those were messing up with you. “I’m not ovulating, it’s fine.” He shook his head, “Still gotta get you some plan B. We shouldn’t be risking it.”

“Sure.” You tried to swallow the ache in your throat, and your pride.

You fixed your top and found your thong on the ground, raising it to put it on. Tension between the two of you was so thick that a saw could not even cut it.

He got back on his seat and started the engine. “The sun is about to rise, I can drive to a diner and got us some breakfast. There is a place I know makes your favourite. They are also good at making it.” He couldn’t hide his smile when he saw your smile at the mention of the food. He loved making you smile like that.

Sleep was the last thing on your mind, since he fucked your brains out. Since it had been more than 10 hours since you last ate something; growling sounds from your stomach was about to come. “Sounds good but I want to wear my skirt first.”

“Sure bunny.” He said as he tossed your skirt back to you.

And it was a second, just a second, that he felt like he could get used to it.

He could get used to having breakfast with you. He could get used to your face being the first thing he saw as he started his day. He could get used to having sex with only one person, someone really means something to him.

But when your phone buzzed, and he saw your dad’s name on the screen he got back into reality.

You sent it to voicemail, and leaned closer to him over the table. He saw the same smile again on your lips and the familiar spark on your eyes.

“So what do you say? Your place or mine?”

He smiled back at you, leaning over you. “Which one do you prefer, bunny?” He knew he could go on as long as you looked at him like that.

As long as you looked at him with love. Even if you were just realizing, he was already an addict for it.

[literaryavenger]

Love Is A Battlefield

Summary: Bucky gets hurt during a mission and you can't help but blame yourself.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Minimal use of Y/N. Language cause why not. Mentions of Bucky's past. Injuries. Overprotective reader. Description of violence. Fluff. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 4.5K

A/N: This was inspired by this post and a dream I had lol. I couldn't help but start writing and this is what came out. Enjoy.

Masterlist

"Who the fuck do you think you’re calling a bitch, you ass?" you sneer at the guy to your left right before kicking him in the stomach and then bringing his head down on your knee when he doubles over, effectively knocking him out.

"Language!" you hear in you earpiece and roll your eyes.

"Why don’t you shut the fuck up, Rogers." you tell him while making your way through the corridor, taking Hydra agents down as you go.

"Can’t you do this without cursing so much?!" he sounds more exasperated at you than at the agents he’s supposed to keep distracted outside.

"Can’t you stop bitching in my ear? I’m a little busy here!" all he answers with is a groan and you know you won this round.

You hear Sam crackling before he says "1-0 to Y/N." which makes you laugh.

"Thanks, Sammy."

"Anytime, baby." you roll your eyes at his nickname, the small distraction allowing an agent to get too close to you and you feel a sharp pain in your forearm and almost drop your gun.

"Shit!" you hiss at the pain and zero in on the idiot that cut you.

You can hear the concerned voices in your ear, but don’t allow yourself to get distracted again as you take care of the last few agents on your side of the building.

"Y/N, are you okay? What’s happening? Can someone get to her?" you hear Bucky’s voice for the first time since the mission started and you can’t help the warm feeling it brings, the concern in his voice making you answer almost immediately.

"Just give me a minute!" you say as you battle the last guy standing.

Once you’ve successfully knocked him out, you take a second to breathe before addressing the voices still coming to your ear while you make your way through the maze of corridors in this Hydra base.

"I’m okay guys, but apparently all these people have some sort of collective knife kink." you say and you can hear Steve’s annoyed groan and the rest of the team’s laughter as you check out your cut. Not too deep, you think to yourself.

You think you hear a relieved sigh between the laughter, but almost instantly forget about it as you finally come to the door you’ve been looking for.

"Clint, status?" you ask him since he’s on the roof, being the eyes on the whole operation.

"Everyone’s thoroughly distracted out here." he answers.

"Good. James, Sam, are you done with the explosives?" you can hear Sam grunting as you enter the room, locating the computer you need and turning it on.

"Just a second!" Sam says, you hear a couple of punches landing and then "Done. This place is ready to blow as soon as you have the files."

"And hurry, we can’t hold them off forever." Steve adds.

"Inserting the USB now, I need at least 5 minutes for the download to finish. Friday, remember to copy Hill at Shield HQ and to save the files in the Avengers private server." you tell the AI as you make your way through the office, grabbing files that seem important as the digital ones download.

"Really? Why the private server?" Steve asks between punches.

"Because, Captain Dumbass, these files could contain sensitive information about one of our own. We have to be careful with them." you say while still looking through the cabinets of papers.

"Do you have to be so mean to me?" he almost whines.

"Hey, it’s your best friend that I’m looking out for." you say almost laughing.

"Yeah, I’m sure it’s me you’re doing this for." You can basically hear the smirk in Steve’s voice but before you can answer, Natasha cuts in.

"Are you two done bickering?" she says annoyed.

"Oh no, please, let them keep going, this is so entertaining." Tony comments, but you get distracted from the conversation when you find a black box in one of the desk drawers that was previously locked, you open it and can’t help the gasp that escapes you. Bucky’s dog tags.

"Guys… do we have to blow up this base?" you ask, quieter than you’d like, leaving everyone else confused. Between all of the “what”s you hear Steve say your name.

"You know the drill, we download the digital files, save as much of the paper ones as we can and then blow the building up. This one’s no different." he tells you, but you can’t help but disagree.

"I think it is…" you can hear them asking you to explain, so you do, trying to find the right way to say this "I think… I think this is the first base they took James to." you say, still talking quietly but loud enough for them to hear.

The comms go silent, everyone processing what you just say, only the sound of battling going on, but you’re only worried about one person.

"James?"

Nothing.

"James, are you okay?" you can’t help but worry, his silence snapping you out of the trance you were in, you close the box you were still staring at and put it safely in your pocket, your hand going to your ear instinctively.

"Bucky?!" He still doesn’t answer.

You hear a bip behind you and Friday lets you know the download is complete, you take the drive and make your way out, your worry only increasing with every step.

"Does anyone have eyes on Barnes?" you ask the rest of the team.

"Oh no." Clint says, and you stop immediately, your heart beating out of your chest.

"What?! You can’t just say ‘oh no’ and not elaborate, Barton!" your mind is going into overdrive, not knowing what to expect.

"I have eyes on him, but you’re not gonna like it."

"What do you mean, Clint?! just say it!" this time Steve is the one to snap at him.

"He’s getting surrounded, it looks like he’s passed out." you swear you can actually feel your heart stopping.

"Can anybody get to him?" you say desperately.

"He’s got maybe 2 minutes before he’s surrounded, everybody’s too far or too busy." yeah, Clint’s really not giving you any good news today.

"Can’t you help him out?!" you almost yell at him.

"Not without hurting him, there are just too many!" he sounds more worried with every word and you know it’s bad. "Technically you’re the closest." He informs you and you frown.

"What do you mean, technically?" You look out the window of the corridor you found yourself in, looking towards the roof and find Clint already looking down at you while he speaks without stopping his aid of the others with his arrows.

"The second window to your left. He’s right under it." you go to said window and try to open it, but it’s closed shut.

"These windows are bulletproof, Clint can you break it somehow?"

"I can, but you could get hu-"

"Just do it!" you yell, cutting him off.

You can see him aim an arrow to the window, it hits its target and you can hear Clint counting down from 3 before it shatters.

You take no time to be careful of the glass as you take a little disk from your belt and press the button while pointing it at the ground.

A rope shoots out of it and anchors to the floor and, while attaching the other end to the back of your suit, you make a mental note to thank Tony for always updating your tactical suits with new useful gadgets.

You leap out the window, landing with your feet on the wall, basically running down on it as you take out your guns and start shooting down at the now dumbfounded agents.

Before they can even figure out where the shooting is coming from, you're on the ground next to Bucky, cutting the rope with a knife, then stabbing the agent closest to you.

You’re punching, kicking and shooting, trying your best not to get too far away from Bucky, basically shielding him with your body.

You hear a faint ‘holy shit’ from Clint and the other’s voices come through but you can’t follow the conversation, your whole focus on keeping Bucky safe.

You stray a little too far away from him as you do the take down move Natasha taught you on one of the agents, your legs around his neck as you bring him down to the ground.

When you turn around you see one guy getting dangerously close to Bucky’s unconscious body and you feel a sudden burst of possessiveness throughout your own body.

"He’s mine." you basically growl, taking a knife from the body of the guy you just took down and throwing it.

It lodges perfectly in his throat and he goes down right away, blood pouring out of him. You have no time to be disgusted as you keep taking down agents and, one after the other, they all drop.

The second the last one touches the ground, you're kneeling down next to Bucky.

"Please don’t be dead, please don’t be dead, please don't be dead..." you keep repeating, looking for the button on his tactical suit that monitors his health. Again, thanks Tony. You find it and press it "Friday, vitals."

"Heartbeat detected." the AI says and you immediately let out a breath of relief, not even knowing when you started holding your breath. "Head injury detected, possible concussion. Various cuts throughout his body. No other injuries detected."

It could be worse.

You give yourself a second to breathe while looking at Bucky, then talk into your comm, not taking your eyes off of him.

"Ok, guys, uhm... Bucky’s ass may be cute but it’s heavy. I’m gonna need a hand here." you hear some snickers and then Clint’s voice. "Cap and Sam are on their way."

You’re still looking at Bucky, almost worried that the second you take your eyes off of him his heartbeat is gonna stop, when you hear footsteps behind you and, almost automatically, you grab a knife next to your foot and throw it.

You hear it before you see it, the metal of the knife hitting Cap’s shield before he lowers it and, his face shocked and glad for his fast reflexes, he says "Relax, it’s just us."

"Sorry, I’m a little jumpy."

"Gee, wonder why." Sam says sarcastically as you turn back to Bucky.

"Just take James to the jet, Sam."

"Why do I have to carry his ass?" he whines like a child.

"Because you can fly, birdbrain, you’ll get there before we make it to the front gate." you’re almost irritated at this point, but when you turn to the duo and Sam gives you an unimpressed look, you sigh and try to calm down.

"Sorry, just… take him to safety. Please." Your voice is soft now, Bucky’s well-being the only thing on your mind. Sam picks up on your concern and gets serious, moving towards Bucky to pick him up.

"I’ll take him to the jet. See you guys there." and with that, he takes off.

You watch him go for a second before you feel a hand on your shoulder, turning around to see Steve’s equally concerned face.

"Relax, you heard Friday, he’s gonna be fine. Even if he does have a concussion the serum will heal him in an instant." you know he's right, thanks to the serum his bones heal overnight, a concussion is nothing.

But still, you can’t help the worry you feel.

"I’ll relax when he’s awake and I can see he’s fine." he’s about to say something back when you hear Tony’s voice in your ear.

"If you two are done making out about it, we really should be getting out of here." you roll your eyes and smile a little at the pink color Steve’s cheeks were turning while you start making your way to the front courtyard of the base where Natasha and Tony are still holding off the remaining Hydra agents that just seemed to keep coming.

The second he sees you both giving them a hand, Tony takes off towards the roof. "Incoming, Robin Hood, get ready for take off."

This is your cue to get to the jet, Steve, Natasha and you making your way to the front gate while still fighting, the remaining agents scrambling away the second the explosions inside the building start.

You all get to the jet and, after making sure everyone’s inside, Steve turns to Clint. "Take us home, Barton." he merely nods and makes his way to the pilot's seat, immediately taking off.

You make a beeline to where Bucky’s lying on a gurney, still unconscious.

"How is he?" you ask Bruce without taking your eyes away from the super soldier’s face.

"He’s okay, his cuts are already starting to heal themselves, so should be his head injury. He should wake up maybe within the hour, two tops." you nod and make your way to the chair beside his bed, taking his right hand in both of yours. 

You don’t know why you do that, now that you think about it you’ve probably not even touched Bucky in general more than a handful of times.

You’re not the closest of friends, you work well together in the field and get along outside of it, you hang out in group settings such as game and movie nights, team trainings and the team-building outings Tony forces everybody to go on, but that’s about it.

The lack of one on one interactions, though, didn’t help you escape your growing crush for the long-haired super soldier. You just can’t help the warm feeling you get every time he’s even in the same room, let alone when he looks at you.

You can hide it when you’re in mission mode, always being professional, but the second it happens in a normal setting like the living room or the kitchen or the gym you turn into a flustered schoolgirl, stumbling over your words and blushing every time you have his attention.

You’ve convinced yourself he doesn’t notice, if he has he hasn’t said anything, but for your own piece of mind you pretend he just doesn’t.

Sometimes it seems like he does it on purpose, though. He’d get close enough that you can smell his cologne and basically feel his body heat.

Sometimes his hands hover on your waist while he passes by you, never actually touching you but just close enough to make you almost pass out at the feeling.

And you can swear you can see a smirk on his face, but it always disappears so fast it’s just easier to convince yourself you’re imagining it.

He would have the most innocent face while asking you if something’s wrong, and all you can answer with is a small ‘I’m fine’ before basically running away, never once seeing the smug look on his face at the flustered state only he manages to put you in.

You’re brought out of your head by Steve’s hand on your shoulder, again, as he says "he’s gonna be fine."

"It’s my fault…" you say quietly, ignoring his attempt at comforting you.

"It’s not y-" you interrupt him before he can even finish.

"Yes, it is. I distracted him." You say firmly before your voice softens. "They were so close to getting him, Steve..."

You can’t take your eyes off of Bucky, almost willing him to wake up, so you could apologize. "Do you have any idea what would’ve happened if they got to him? What they could’ve done to him…" you trail off, not wanting to voice all the possibilities out loud.

Of course you know Steve knows. He worries more than you for Bucky, his best friend, basically his brother, the only family he has left from his past life.

But Steve is having none of it.

"You wanna play the blame game? He wasn’t even supposed to be on this mission, but I couldn’t stop him. He knew what it entailed, he knew it was a base full of hydra agents, but he didn’t back down because it was the right thing to do. He wants to do good and help us take down Hydra for good, he knows the risks but it was his choice. You can’t take that on you." Logically you know he's annoyingly right, again, but looking at Bucky laying motionless you can’t help the guilt that creeps up on you. 

"Friday," you say quietly, ignoring Steve’s confused look "play the footage of Bucky before he passed out coupled with the audio from our comms."

The hologram on the table in the middle of the jet lights up and Bucky’s figure can be seen fighting, then you can hear your own voice telling your theory to the group and Bucky halts for a second, he almost gets punched but avoids it at the last second, hitting the guy with his metal arm.

Steve turns to you with a smug look, knowing he was right, but you raise your hand before he can say anything and keep watching.

You see Bucky fighting and hear yourself calling his name and you can see his eyes rolling when you call him James. He’s asked you countless times to call him Bucky, but you always refuse, not sure why.

All you know it’s that it kind of annoys him but in a different way than when Sam or Peter annoy him, you can tell he’s not actually upset, it’s kind of your own little thing with him seeing as he doesn’t allow anyone else call him by his first name.

You can see Bucky still fighting and ignoring you, but when he hears you call him “Bucky” for the first time he stops, right as an agent is throwing a punch.

You see Bucky get hit in the jaw, stumble and fall, his head hitting the wall behind him pretty hard. He doesn’t get up, but you see the last agent standing get taken out by an arrow, Clint you assume.

You can hear your alarmed conversation with Clint as more agents slowly creep up on Bucky, probably being cautious, worried he could wake up any second, then there’s the sound of bullets flying and agents getting hit.

Suddenly you’re there.

You take your eyes off the screen, about to tell Steve that even he can’t deny now that it was your fault, but the whole team's attention was on the footage of you mercilessly taking out man after man, even Clint’s there watching after putting the jet on autopilot.

The look on your face frightening to the point where you almost don’t recognize yourself.

You don’t want to relive the moment, so you shift your attention back on Bucky, your hands still holding onto his.

You can hear Clint’s “holy shit” and then your “he’ mine” and you feel yourself heat up at the possessiveness in your voice.

The video gets paused and you can hear Tony asking "what the fuck was that?" his voice clearly amused, and you know what he’s asking you.

Before you can answer though, you feel Bucky’s hand squeeze yours softly, your eyes snaps down to it and then to his face while getting up from your chair.

He’s mumbling something that sounds very similar to your name but his eyes are still closed.

"James?" he slowly opens his eyes and they instantly find yours, a smile forming on his face that you can’t but mirror.

"How do you feel, Buck?" Steve asks him from beside you.

"Like I got hit really hard in the head." he groans while he tries to sit up, his hand still holding onto yours while you help him.

"Take it easy," Bruce tells him while stopping next to him on his other side "you probably don’t have a concussion, but I’d put some ice on your head to help with the headache."

"I’ll get it." you let go of Bucky, and walk to the mini freezer to get the ice pack.

Bucky takes a moment to look around him, his eyes landing on the screen where you’re frozen mid-fight.

"Friday, unpause the video." he says, curiosity taking over.

He watches you fight, protecting him with your life and he swears he’s never been more in awe in his life. He sees you get on your knees next to him and hears your whispers, praying for him to be okay, over and over.

He sees the relief in your face when Friday tells you he’s alive and he hears you call his ass “cute” as you ask the others for help, making him smile again.

"Friday, stop the footage." you say, ice in your hands but maintaining a safe distance from Bucky, embarrassed that he saw how worried you were for him.

You stand there in silence for a second while Bucky turns to look at you, the smirk on his face definitely real. You blush, cursing your body for how it reacts to his gaze, while Steve clears his throat.

"Why don’t we give you guys a minute..." he ushers everyone to the front of the jet, almost having to wrestle Tony to take him away from what he called 'his new favorite show'.

Bucky extends his right hand for you to take and you do as you get closer, your left hand going to carefully place the ice on the back of his head.

He hisses a little at the contact and you wince, giving him an apologetic smile, but his eyes never leave yours and his hand squeezes yours, letting you know he’s okay.

"I’m sorry." That's all you can say and, whatever you were expecting him to answer, it was definitely not what he says next.

"You should be." you bite your lip to stop it from trembling, your emotions getting the best of you and your guilt only growing, but he keeps going, "You distracted me. You’ve never said my name before, and it was the sweetest sound to ever come out of your mouth. Shame on you for keeping it from me for so long, doll."

He brings you closer to him, taking your hand in his left, his right going around your waist as he rests his chin on your stomach while looking up at you, your left hand still holding the ice to the back of his head.

You giggle at the puppy look he’s giving you, trying to resist the urge of leaning down and kissing him.

"Smooth, Barnes." he laughs with you, before growing more serious.

"You looked really worried." you feel your emotions bubbling up again.

"I was…" you say, your voice small "I’m sorry you got hurt because of me" you're basically whispering, afraid that if you raise your voice any louder the tears you’d been trying so hard to hold off will start falling.

"It’s not your fault, doll." before you can protest, he keeps going "and I’m fine. We’re all fine. I just took a little nap."

You roll your eyes at his attempt at a joke but can’t hide the smile starting to form on your face while he gives you a grin of his own.

You're so lost in his eyes that you almost forget about the reason all of this happened.

You let go of his hand and he gives you a confused look with a slight pout on his lips that just makes you smile more.

"Bucky," you start, taking the little box out of your pocket, but he interrupts you with an exaggerated gasp.

"Are you asking me to marry you, doll? Because, don’t get me wrong, I’m flattered, but maybe we should go on a date first." you can't help but laugh as you gave him a little shove, careful not to hurt him more.

"I’m not asking you to marry me, you jackass." you get more serious as you look at the box in your hand.

You don’t even realize you're biting your lip until Bucky reaches up and tugs it out. You look back at him and feel weirdly nervous, not knowing how he'll react.

"I found this at the base, and I’m pretty sure it belongs to you" you laugh a little out of nerves as he lets go of you to take the box and opens it.

He lets out a real gasp this time, fishing out the tags and holding them in his flesh hand, his face unreadable.

He looks back up at you and for a second your brain goes to the worst case scenario in which there's a lot of blood and screaming, but that image is quickly forgotten as Bucky gives you the biggest smile you’ve ever seen on his face.

He places his hands behind your thighs and effortlessly moves you to straddle him, his movements so fast that you drop the ice pack out of surprise, but you don’t have time to do much as Bucky starts peppering kisses all over your face.

Your surprise turns into giggles and he slowly stops his assault, the smile never living his face, the look on his eyes that of pure adoration. "Thank you, doll… You don’t know what this means to me."

You don’t know if you’re imagining it, but you think Bucky’s starting to lean up and you think he’s about to kiss you when you hear a whistle followed by a slapping sound and an “ow”.

You both turn towards the sound to find the whole team looking at you two, Steve has a smirk on his face, Tony’s next to him, rubbing the back of his head and the rest of them are snickering.

"Seriously?!" your irritation does nothing to hide your blush, Bucky’s own embarrassment clear as he hides his face in your chest. 

"What? Capsicle said a minute, we gave you a minute!" Tony said, earning another slap on the back of his head from Steve.

"Just go away!" you say laughing and they all go back to the front of the jet but you can hear their little laughs while they whisper, making you roll your eyes before looking down at Bucky who’s already looking up at you.

"Can you do me a favor, doll?" he asks you and you nod.

"Anything."

"I’d hate to lose these. Hold on to them for me?" he says, holding up his dog tags.

"Are you sure?" you ask uncertainly as he puts them around your neck.

"I’m more than sure." he says while looking at them on your chest and then looking back into your eyes, his smile impossibly big and you’re sure yours looks the same.

He wraps his arms around your waist, bringing you closer and you wrap one arm around his neck, your other hand going to play with the tags around your neck. You’re looking down at them when Bucky speaks again.

"So," He starts, his smile becoming a teasing smirk. "you think my ass is cute, huh?"

You groan, hiding your face in the crook of his neck while he laughs at your reaction.

You can hear the others laughing too and can’t help the laugh that comes out of you, more sure now than ever that everything is gonna be okay.

[naturesapphic]

Hey, I really enjoyed the last fanfic you did for me and I was wondering if you could do another Rhea Ripley x Reader where they're watching Backlash at home, and when JD and Finn come out to help Damien Reader forgets Rhea's hurt and says something like " where's Rhea" and Rhea's like "Im right here"

Cause I keep forgetting she's hurt and thinking she's gonna show up.

Backlash

Rhea ripley x fem!reader

Warnings: fluff

You were sitting on the couch with your girlfriend Rhea ripley watching backlash. Damien was fighting against jey uso and out of no where Finn came running out and tried to get jey but was kicked in the face by him and landed flat on his back. I don’t think Damien even noticed that he tried to help let alone him being out there.

“Bro what the fuck! Damien! Pay attention!” You huffed out and crossed your arms as you payed close attention to the match. Rhea gave you a side eye and smiled at your behavior. The dogs came over, including Bella, and sat on y’all’s laps. Luna went over to Rhea and barry went over to you, whining for your attention.

You grabbed him in your arms and wrapped your arms around his body as you continued to watch the match. Barry seemed content and stopped whining. A few moments after jey had Damian pinned down and jey was about to win when jd appeared and grabbed damiens foot and put it on the rope to disrupt the countdown.

Everyone screamed and your mouth opened in shock and you were getting anxious but relieved that jd came out to help, even though you don’t like him. Then you realized that Rhea isn’t out yet. “Where’s Rhea?” You said not realizing that your girlfriend was right beside you. “Im right here?” She said and gave you a dumbfounded look. You looked at her sheepishly and blushed from embarrassment.

“Please forget that I said that.” You stated and she smirked. “Not a chance doll.” She said and you groaned in annoyance. “You are never gonna let me live this down are you?” You said and she shook her head now. “Im telling everyone and tweeting about it now. It’s too fucking funny.” She laughed and went on her phone tweeting and making Instagram stories about it as you sat on the side and pouted at her.

“You’re mean.” You said as Rhea pointed the camera towards you and laughed playfully. She scooted closer to you and started peppering your face with kisses to make up for her teasing towards you. You started to giggle and your face flushing red at the kisses and attention she was giving you. She stopped recording and put “she’s my dumbass but she’s my dumbass and I fucking love her.” She said on her story and posted it and tagged you in it.

You continued to blush and Rhea kept smirking at you as y’all continued to watch backlash together. A few more moments later and Damien pinned down jey and kept his belt. Everyone cheered including you and Rhea then groaned when everything went to shit between the judgement day. “They definitely need mami back because what is this shit? They are so childish my gosh.” You said and Rhea laughed, wrapping her arms around you.

“Is that right?” She asked and you nodded. “Mami makes the rules.” You said shrugging, knowing that you were right Rhea nodded her head at you. “Do you want to watch some trash reality tv now?” You asked her and she smiled. “Of course.” She stated and you went onto her lap facing her and snuggled into her strong arms. Barry whining for y’all’s attention so you put him beside the both of you and started petting him. Rhea turned something on and placed the remote down to wrap her arms around you, securing you as you laid your head on her shoulder. Even though it’s sad that Rhea had to be on break because of her injury, you are still glad for this opportunity to spend time with your girlfriend.

A/n: I hope this is what you wanted @drsheperd-bartley18 ! And I hope the rest of y’all enjoyed! Remember that my Melanie martinez, Billie eilish and the rest of my characters requests are still open! And remember to stay hydrated and to rest! I love yall! :)

[demonslayerunhinged]

how different do you think demon slayer would've been if they had modern stuff like phones, social media, video games, better transportation, T H E R A P Y?

Would there be constant online arguments between the hashira and the upper moons?

Just curious on what you think would happen if this were the case

Hi anon! Sorry for the late reply! Here are my headcanons with a little SaneGiyuu sprinkled in of course.

The Hashiras and the Upper Moons would definitely have Whatsapp chat groups where the Master would call them for meetings, they would discuss about their missions and they would clown on Giyuu 😂

The therapy would be one of those closed room sections where they can rant about their colleagues and missions kinda like the way contestants do in Big Brother or Total Drama Island.

...

The Infinity Castle would be an office similar to how it is in the Gakuen. Akaza is desperate to make Rengoku a demon because he needed a (boy)friend in his toxic workplace.

Kokushibo is the bossy, know-it-all who thinks he's the second boss, he definitely has the company logo as his social media profile pic and talks about putting the company first yada yada yada

Douma is the snake that pretends to be nice to you but talks about you when you're not around, preys on the new female hires, and has a special seat reserved for him in the HR department.

Nakime is the colleague that keeps to herself, does their work, doesn't really talk to anyone and peaces out once it's 5.

Gyokko is the suck up who tries to see how far they can push their nose up the boss's ass to get a promotion or recognition.

Hantengu is the old head that pretends to be incompetent and pitiful so that you'll end up doing all their work

Gyutaro and Daki are the gen-z types that hate the job but need the money, won't stop questioning authority and who you're secretly jealous of because of their gutsy behavior.

Akaza is the only sane one who has an already drafted resignation letter saved on his computer desktop that he wants to submit every Monday or everytime Douma opens his mouth. He copes by scrolling through office/shitty colleague memes, snorting coffee and dreaming up fantasies about the office exploding.

Douma has been banned from the Upper Moon group chat for posting too many memes and Blue Spider lily troll posts.

...

Giyuu constantly forgets the gate code to the Master's mansion when there's a Hashira meeting and when he asks on the group chat the other Hashiras mostly ignore him.

Sanemi dms him and gives him the code after calling him a dumbass.

Gyomei is always posting cat pictures and videos on the group chats.

Tengen takes a selfie during every mission and posts ot on his status.

Giyuu's driver is always late because he is old and always forgets where Giyuu's house is but Giyuu doesn't have the heart to fire him because the driver cares for him like a grandson.

Sanemi drives himself to his missions.

Rengoku always types in capital letters and Obanai is always asking why he's shouting.

Mitsuri has an Instagram where she posts about fashion, her cats and food. Obanai likes every post, he also likes every Mitsuri group chat post no matter how silly it is.

Whenever Rengoku goes on missions, he always visits the restaurants in the area and gives ratings and reviews on Google Maps.

Muichiro, Genya, Kanao, Inosuke, Zenitsu and Tanjiro spend their free time on their shared Minecraft server making cool builds.

Zenitsu screams whenever there's a creeper around, Inosuke just runs towards it like an idiot. He has the highest respawn rate out of any of them.

Tanjiro always greets each of the villagers he encounters, he's even nice to the traveling merchant. He also has a lot of dogs and cats. His base is in the jungle because of the pandas. He likes to explore and collect lots of resources.

Muichiro, Kanao and Inosuke like to explore the caves. Inosuke likes to sneak into Zenitsu's base and steal his stuff. He also has a lot of dogs which he calls the Hoard.

Kanao makes fancy builds and has a lot of xp, food and resource farms because she values efficiency and she always shows off her builds to Shinobu and the butterfly girls. She's the first one in the group to get netherite armor and sword.

Inosuke is banned from several stores and malls especially Walmart.

Sanemi and Obanai play COD together and bully/kill teammates or other players who are misogynistic and shout slurs.

Giyuu saves the Hashira's names formally on his phone but saves Sanemi's with his first name.

Giyuu and Sanemi text each other constantly and Sanemi always asks if he's eaten and offers to cook food for Giyuu at his place.

Shinobu always trolls Giyuu on the groupchat and she's banned from several pharmacies for her questionable requests about poisons but has settled for ordering them from the dark web.

She's currently on a watchlist for her ties to several eco-terrorist groups. She had a channel where she talked about poisons and bombs but it was taken down by YouTube.

She often takes the butterfly girls for ice cream and they have movie nights. Her favorite movie is Jennifer's Body and Mean Girls, least to say Aoi and Kanao are very concerned for her.

Muichiro always has to explain gen-z slang and memes to Gyomei.

Tengen is always posting thirst traps on Instagram along with pictures of his wives.

...

Kokushibo always handles Muzan's Amazon orders. Muzan orders a lot of hair products, he shops at designer stores and has a Sephora membership card.

Gyutaro and Daki are always bullying kids on Roblox and griefing peoples builds on public Minecraft servers.

Gyokko's Instagram page features his pots and 'art pieces', Hantengu likes all his posts.

Akaza listens to Avril Lavigne and posts about his colleagues and how he hates his job on Reddit and Tumblr.

The Infinity Castle wifi password is Muzan4prez set by Douma of course.

Nakime's favorite channel is HGTV because she's always looking for ideas on how to redecorate the Infinity Castle.

Muzan always watches E! especially when the Awards Season comes around. He's especially fond of the Met Gala. His favorite show is Hell's Kitchen.

Kokushibo likes watching the National Geographic channel and NatGeo wild on occasion.

...

The Master always forces Shinobu, Sanemi, Obanai and Giyuu to have professional therapy sessions. He also checks up on them to make sure they go every week and bribes them with movie nights with him.

He always posts motivational quotes and positive messages for the Hashira but isn't above posting memes and troll posts every once in a while. Sanemi likes all of his posts, chats and comments.

...

That's all I can think of for now. The slaying of the demons will be the same, they would still use katanas because they're more efficient than guns.

[daddy-dins-girl]

Pedro Boys - "Zombie Apocalypse Team"

this might be my favourite one yet... keep reading for headcanons!

related posts: Pedro Boys "During a Fire Emergency" Pedro Boys "Nice Argument. Unfortunately," Pedro Boys "Don't Fuck This Up" Pedro Boys "Dad(dy) Matrix" Pedro Boys & Stabbing Pedro Boys "Lawful/Neutral/Chaotic" Pedro Boys "Feral/Sad/Angelic" Pedro Boys Respond to "I love you." Pedro Boys "Character Tropes" Pedro Boys "Gay/Depressed/Horny on Main" Pedro Boys "Dad/THOT/Bastard" Pedro Boys "bring some Coke to the party" Pedro Boys "I Want a Baby" Pedro Boys "As Babysitters" Pedro Boys "As McDonald's Dads" Pedro Boys "in a horror movie" Pedro Boys "Cinnamon Rolls" Pedro Boys "5 Kids, 3 Chairs" Pedro Boys "Playing Monopoly"

Headcanons under the cut!

Leader - Dave York. Simply put, Dave wouldn’t allow anyone else to be in charge of him, regardless if they’d be better suited for it. Some of the others follow him out of fear, others simply because they'd just prefer not to be in charge.

Brawler - Joel Miller. The muscle. Not so great with his words, much better with his fists.

Weapons Expert - Din Djarin. A bonafide space cowboy, this man has it all. Blasters, rifles, flamethrower, jet pack. Evaporating infected before they even see him coming.

Brains - Marcus Moreno. Truly the Team Leader, but he lets Dave hold the title. He has the mutual respect of everyone, is level headed and the glue that holds the whole group together. He advises Dave, but in a way that makes Dave think they’re his own ideas. Marcus doesn't need to take any credit, he just wants everyone to be safe.

Medic - Frankie "Catfish" Morales. He’s no doctor, but he's had enough basic field medical training in his military days to at least be able to patch everyone up better than anyone else on the team. He’d prefer to be the Vehicle Expert but sadly, modes of transportation in the apocalypse are hard to come by.

Moral Support - Marcus Pike. Always looking at the bright side of the apocalypse. He likes to joke “when life hands you cordyceps, make mushroom tetrazzini”.

Scientist - Ezra. Not exactly Einstein, but he knows what berries and plants are safe and which to avoid during long treks through the wilderness. He’s proven himself useful more so than not. Mostly he keeps Dieter from accidentally un-aliving himself.

Risk taker - Max Phillips. Loud and outspoken, Max's mouth is always getting the group into trouble. Good luck to any infected that tries to turn him though, his ego is so big its like a thick candy shell around the vulnerable parts of his brain.

Stealthy - Oberyn Martell. Forget sniping infected from 100 yards away, this man simply sneaks up behind them and with some flourishing footwork they're on the ground with any sharp object he could get his hands on slicing through the flesh of their throat. He's also stealthy in the way he manages to slip into the others' sleeping bags without them evening realizing at the time that they want him to, but that's a headcanon for another post...

Dumbass - Dieter Bravo. It's not that he wants to die, it's just that he seems to occasionally forget that he can't just eat the fungus as if it came in a Ziplock bag that he use to pay 40 bucks a pop for.

Badass - Javier Peña. This man just continuously takes down infected as if they might actually come to an end. He knows that as quickly as he takes down one colony, four more spring up, but he's stubborn and refuses to stop trying, regardless of how tired he is of it all.

Mascot - Javi Gutierrez. He is babygirl. To be protected at all costs.

Distraction - Jack "Whiskey" Daniels. A real root-tootin, gun-blazin cowboy. Jack never needs to be asked twice to go put on a spectacle in the middle of an open field, gathering all the attention so the rest of the group can flank all sides under brush cover. He seems to have nine lives too, narrowly escaping death more times than any other. And he can handle his own. He argued for the spot of Weapons Expert but ultimately was swayed when he realized being the distraction actually meant being the center of attention.

Stereotype - Pero Tovar. One look at this man screams "if anyone was going to survive a zombie apocalypse, it's him"

Sacrifice - Dio. Look, it was his idea. The weird part was that nobody even asked him to.

First Dead - Eddie. It's just facts. In a long line of Pedro Boys deaths, someone had to be first.

Reply or reblog with your own headcanons, I'd love to hear them :)

[zero-in-kyoto]

[Dance to forget] Five x reader

tags/warnings: Slight alcohol mentions, season 3 spoilers, cringe, unfunny jokes, no beta we die like klaus, I was bored, no prominent romantic interactions so it can be taken platonic.

[Dance to forget]

The lights were bright and everyone was enjoying themselves at Sloane and Luther’s wedding. Drinking, dancing, conversing, however there was some underlying tension in the air. Throughout Viktor, Allison, and a stressed Five, who was drinking down beers like it was nothing. His tolerance must be high. You slid into the seat next to him and too drunk beer. It burned and you coughed it up. “How do people enjoy drinking this stuff?” You cough out, and Five starts patting you back to help. Yet he still seemed so deep it thought.

You poked him then knocked on his head like it was a door , and he recoiled as a response then turned to you with an unamused expression. “What’s going on upstairs? You’re thinking so hard, you’re sweating. Your mind must be in a track meet.” You question and joke with him. He drunk more of his beer before throwing the bottle in a corner, it shattering, and momentarily getting everyone’s attention. Everyone turned to look at you both, rather Five, for about 16 seconds before returning to what they were doing.

“There was no need to do something so melodramatic.” You subconsciously scolded him for doing that. “It’s not like it matters. Nothing we do matters anymore.” He muttered, and what he said made you double take. It was true, however it felt weird hearing him sound so crushed. Fair enough though, they’d saved the world several times and there wasn’t a lot to do this time around but just wait till the all withered away with the rest of the hotel. 

you chugged down a beer, and got another to chug down. Five stopped you from chugging down the second. “Slow down, alcohol poisoning would be a much more unpleasant death.” You retract the drink from the lips and unexpectedly grab his hand and take him to the floor to dance. You had drunk just enough to be tipsy. “What are you doing?” He growled out.

“We are.. going to dance to get you out your bad mood.”

“I don’t dance.”

“Me neither, but we are now.”

I grabbed his hands and placed them on my waist and I put mine on his shoulder. At this angle, I could truly appreciate how beautiful this wedding was set up. The lights and all the white combining together.

“Just try to mirror me, okay?” You mumble softly with a bit of hesitance on your ability to make it work, hardly even knowing to dance yourself.

You stepped back, and he stuttered a step forward. He looked down, and you giggled. “Don’t worry about it too much. You’ve got it. Just focus okay.” You said to him to soothe him.

He looked up at you and just seemed to zone out, all he could hear was the clicking on both of your shoes, and muffled out music as he was drowning it out. It surely was distracting him, so much so that he truly was not and it pained him to think about anything but dancing with you. However, things were on his mind, how could there not be? It’s not that he wanted his mind to work overtime, to prolong his work, but he just couldn’t help but to think that there was more that could have been done.

You smiled, and continued dancing, the light sparkled in your eyes. It was trippy to look at. In fact, it made you quite dizzy. You both stepped back, but this time you tripped really hard, but he managed to catch you.

“Careful, dumbass.”

“That was.. amazing.. thank you, shithead..” you mumble.

———————

goofy ahhh.. I wrote this at 12am and posted it after finishing it. Sorry it’s lowkey bad LMFAO. Love yaaa, hope to write some more for you guys soon, requests open!! Btw is there a specific way to do that? I’ve never written on here before this and I’m confused LOL.

[fluffthecloud]

Their Soulmate

Weasley Twins x Male Reader

Summary: Reader has one big soulmate mark on his back instead of a small one on his arm like most people in Hogwarts. He didn't know why but didn't really took mind to it. Now he got put in Hufflepuff, but somehow became friends with the mischievous twin gingers, mainly because they rode on the train together.

Genre:Fluff

Request: ❌

Warnings: N/A

Notes: This is based off a story on AO3 that had the reader as trans post top surgery. This is a Soulmate AU and at this time people didn't really know what polyamory was so everyone thought you had one soulmate.

Tags: @jasperthechaosgremlin pt. 2 pt.3

Y/N got his letter at any normal age Wizards gets theirs. Though his parents weren't too happy, they were envious. Y/N's parents always wanted to go to Hogwarts but they never gotten a letter, so like any other person that never gotten a letter, they went to another magic school that thought the same things just at a lower level.

Y/N had everything he needed nothing more nothing less, so with a few clothes for weekends and things to do in his free time he didn't have much, plus some money for snacks on the train and if he were to buy anything while at Hogwarts.

He was left at the train station by his parents after they told him where to go, he was a bit confused by this and their behavior after he got the letter. Y/N follows their directions to platform 9¾, and he was a bit confused as he was met with a pillar, a brick pillar. "Oh hello there young man!" A sweet voice said behind him, making him turn around, that's when he saw the gingers.

"Hi." He replied back smiling "am I in your way?" He asked moving slightly just in case he was.

"Oh no you are fine, but are you lost?" The lady asked, "oh where are my manners, I'm Molly Weasley, and these are my children, Charlie, Percy, Fred, George, Ron, and Ginny." She pointed at each one. (It took me too long to do simple math to see if Ron and Ginny would be kids or babies around this time)

"I'm Y/N L/N, by any chance do you know how to get to platform 9¾?" He asked hoping to not look like a dumbass and that he kids also got a letter.

"Yeah! You just run through the pillar, and then poff your there at the platform!" One of the twins said, Y/N being unsure which one.

"We got our letter a few weeks ago this is our first year!" The other one said, they really need name tags it would be so helpful.

"It's also my first year." Y/N said cheerfully, "so you just run into the pillar?" He asked looking back at Molly.

"Oh right, you'll miss the train, hurry hurry." One by one the red heads ran through, with you following right behind after saying thanks to Molly.

After getting on the train, you find a cabinet to sit in it was completely empty, so you put you bags in the over hang before taking a seat to silently stare out the window. Not long after you hear some commotion just before the cabinet door slides open to reveal none other than Percy, Fred and George. "L/N so nice to see you again!" Percy chimes, "hope you don't mind us joining you."

"Not at all, come sit." You say with a small smile before looking out the window again. But you soon look back to see the twins fighting for the spot next to you, only for Percy to take it, "if you can't share then neither of you can get it." He said as the two sat across from you.

The train ride was very chatty, mainly the twins trying to strike up conversation with you which worked, you really enjoyed their company. Time seemed to fly by fast because before you knew it you were at you stop, so you got your things and followed the Weasley's off the train.

After the boat ride everyone was now in the dinning hall. Everyone was called up one by one, then it was finally your turn "L/N Y/N!" McGonagall called, which in return you walked right up. You took your seat in the chair that was everyone's attention at that point, which made you feel a bit nervous, which made you forget that you were getting sorted into a house, "HUFFLEPUFF!" The hat yelled, and thanks to being out of it for a minute you jumped and the Hufflepuff table cheered.

As the last of the people got sorted into their houses you made some small talk with the other people at your table. That was over very quickly though because after dinner you were told to follow some person called prefect, apparently they are in charge of us getting to the dorm by lights out. Everyone was lead to their dorms and then it was lights out.

[heavyhitterheaux]

My Baby is Having Three of My Babies

First Babies of Private Garden Instagram AU

Liked by y/ninsta, urbanwyatt, saweetie, quiiso, 2forwoyne, djdrama, danivalentine, estgee, 21savage, and 4,086,225 others

jackharlow: first day out after announcing the pregnancy and her ass don't know how to act 🙄🥴

saweetie: leave my best friend alone. all she's had the pleasure of looking at is your big ass head for how many months?

jackharlow: OUTTA POCKET DIAMONTE!

urbanwyatt: and she had to fight tooth and nail for this to happen. left up to jackharlow he would have kept her in the house until the babies were born

jackharlow: urbanwyatt NO I WOULDN'T!

y/ninsta: jackharlow don't get up here and lie, only reason my pregnancy pic got posted is because I cried and you couldn't get me to stop

jackharlow: y/ninsta well excuse me for being protective over you 🙄

druski2funny: well damn throw me some. why ain't yall tell me yall were going?

jackharlow: y/ninsta you spoiled as hell smh

y/ninsta: jackharlow and it's no one's fault but yours 🥰

y/ninsta: druski2funny since when does your dumbass live in kentucky?

druski2funny: y/ninsta will travel for food

lilnasx: druski2funny your dumbass does realize that wing stop is all over the country, right?

danivalentine: my baby girl looks amazing. that glow is on point 😍

y/ninsta: special thank you to urbanwyatt who yelled at Jack because he was like 'out of all of the places we can go, you want to go to wing stop?'

urbanwyatt: y/ninsta his ass never learns smh, but I will say he's gotten better

jackharlow: urbanwyatt y/ninsta why are yall talking like I'm not here?

y/ninsta: Urby, can we go get ice cream after this? And did you hear something?

jackharlow: SERIOUSLY?

urbanwyatt: y/ninsta of course we can. extra sprinkles for the babies.

jackharlow: so just forget about me over here? WHO JUST SPENT DAMN NEAR 12,000 DOLLARS ON FOUR BIRKINS FOR YOU

y/ninsta: jackharlow it was for the babies! the babies need matching birkins with their mommy!

theestallion: lmaooo y/ninsta runs that damn house

normani: whenever she says jump, Jack says how high and how long do you want me to keep going for?

2forwoyne: SIMP

shloob_: jackharlow that's cheap compared to other things that you've gotten her

jackharlow: shloob_ you would take her side because you're scared of her smh

shloob_: jackharlow AND SO ARE YOU! SO WHY YOU JUST CALLING ME OUT?!

quiiso: it's not so much jackharlow is scared, he just values his life and wants to live a long one

jackharlow: quiiso exactly. you get it.

urbanwyatt: jackharlow only thing I get is that you a simp 🤷‍♂️

Liked by jackharlow, saweetie, danivalentine, djdrama, normani, theestallion, urbanwyatt, cardib, and 7,932,760 others

y/ninsta: yall wanna know their names? 👀

jackharlow: y/ninsta what the? WE don't even know their names!

y/ninsta: jackharlow yes I do, me and quiiso discussed last night

saweetie: y/ninsta so you mean to tell me you decided on their names without telling your husband?

y/ninsta: saweetie yes

jackharlow: y/ninsta I swear all you live for is to stress me out quiiso SHOW YOURSELF

quiiso: jackharlow I didn't do anything but give her a milkshake!

jackharlow: quiiso and I don't believe you

urbanwyatt: I thought we were naming them all after me?

jackharlow: urbanwyatt there's three of them

urbanwyatt: jackharlow I have three names. Urban Henry Wyatt.

2forwoyne: urbanwyatt lmaooooo aye yo

saweetie: them titties sitting right 😍

y/ninsta: saweetie and they're sore and they hurt 😭

saweetie: y/ninsta you better tell your husband to fix that for you

lilnasx: OKAY ARE WE REVEALING NAMES OR NOT? I GOT A FLIGHT TO CATCH

druski2funny: one of them is druski jr.

jackharlow: druski2funny over my dead fucking body

dualipa: look at my baby mama! I can't wait to meet my children!

jackharlow: dualipa what will it take on God's green earth for you to stop terrorizing me?!

dualipa: jackharlow one date with the wife

jackharlow: dualipa NO.

dualipa: jackharlow fine. anyway, I hear pregnancy sex hits tens times better. when you get tired of jack's dick, come get this pussy, byeeeee

jackharlow: DUA!

sza: lmaoooo dua has NO shame

lilnasx: NAME REVEAL NEOW!

jackandy/naremyparents: WE WANT NAMES!

jackharlowsource: well don't get shy now

jackharlow: y/ninsta baby you better NOT

y/ninsta: triple threat harlows! it's their nickname given to them by uncle quiiso

urbanwyatt: and all three of their birth certificates will have a variation of my name

jackharlow: urbanwyatt GIVE IT UP ALREADY

claybornharlow: little baby is hereeeeeee

y/ninsta: MY BABY!!

jackharlow: I get her pregnant and all she does is pay my younger brother attention. tired of this shit.

y/ninsta: smush, your jealousy is showing again. besides, you're the only one in the universe that I would let impregnate me.

brysontiller: y/ninsta only because I was busy

saweetie: OOP!!

jackharlow: I cannot fucking stand any of you smh

Liked by y/ninsta, urbanwyatt, danivalentine, saweetie, 2forwoyne, claybornharlow, jackharlowsource, and 5,792,306 others

jackharlow: she tired of me lmaoooo, crazy that my baby is having three of my babies

y/ninsta: jackharlow you been picking on me all day and I'm about to call maggie

jackharlow: I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING

claybornharlow: I told you that we wouldn't be having these problems if we were still together

jackharlow: claybornharlow imma knock your two front teeth out

urbanwyatt: jackharlow since when can your ass fight? that's all y/ninsta

jackharlow: urbanwyatt you know better 👀

urbanwyatt: 👀

2forwoyne: 👀

shloob_: 👀

yungskylark: 👀

nemoachida: 👀

quiiso: 👀

saweetie: what's them eyes for?!? jack you hiding something?

jackharlow: saweetie nope. nothing at all.

jackandy/naremyparents: I fucking told yall that he fought giveon. it was only speculation but that shit HAS to be true

urbandjack24: I second this!

claybornharlow: jackharlow y/ninsta will get you if you lay a hand on me

jackharlow: claybornharlow she has to catch me first since she isn't so fast these days

y/ninsta: jackharlow touch my little baby and I will END YOU. you will not get to see your three spawns born. MARK MY WORDS

jackharlow: y/ninsta oh? you'll end me? wasn't saying that an hour ago when I had you cum repeatedly on my face

y/ninsta: jackharlow just kidding 😊

y/ninsta: jackharlow but don't touch my baby!

saweetie: yall never let up lmaoooo

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, quiiso, danivalentine, djdrama, saweetie, champagnepapi, and 3,783,004 others

y/ninsta: I thought I was the passenger princess 🤨

jackharlow: y/ninsta YOU DROVE ONE TIME! ONE TIME!

sofftcurse: nah why you making my wife drive tho?

urbanwyatt: softtcurse excuse me, your WHAT?

softtcurse: y/ninsta is my wife, everyone knows this

claybornharlow: softtcurse since when?!

jackharlow: all of yall can fuck off smh

y/ninsta: but doesn't my baby look so cute?!? come here so I can kiss you and pinch your cheeks

jackharlow: y/ninsta stoppppp stink 🙈🙈

y/ninsta: AWW is my baby blushing?! like yall my man is so fucking fine. I see why all the cougars be after him. hint: anitta lmaoooooo but that dick is MINE!

saweetie: y/ninsta BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP! LMAOOOO

jackharlow: y/ninsta you didn't have to add that last part smh

y/ninsta: jackharlow ain't she like 45?

jackharlow: y/ninsta hell if I know, now I'm coming to get my kisses

claybornharlow: y/ninsta me first!

jackharlow: claybornharlow mom should have swallowed you

y/ninsta: JACKMAN THOMAS! NO KISSES FOR YOU! APOLOGIZE!

urbanwyatt: TIME OUT! FLAG ON THE PLAY LMAOOOO

jackharlow: 👀

jackharlow: y/ninsta BUT, WHY?!?!

y/ninsta: jackharlow you know why. apologize to your baby brother NOW.

claybornharlow: jackharlow your wife still loves me more

jackharlow: y/ninsta I'll apologize when he stops terrorizing me

jackharlow: claybornharlow imma need for you to get a girlfriend smh

y/ninsta: claybornharlow it's okay little baby. I'll make you mini sweet potato pies

jackharlow: y/ninsta I WANT SOME TOO

y/ninsta: jackharlow not until you apologize

jackharlow: claybornharlow fuck off

y/ninsta: BABY!

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, danivalentine, saweetie, estgee, champagnepapi, 21savage, neelamthadhani, privategarden, and 4,962,301 others

y/ninsta: bored in the house and I'm in the house bored 🙄 where is my husband so I can give him a lap dance? jackharlow come home already!

jackharlow: throwing it back like that is why your ass is pregnant now, with not one, but three children. stop playing with me because I'll put three more after they're out

y/ninsta: jackharlow THE FUCK YOU NOT!

jackharlow: y/ninsta lemme eat it from the back tho

y/ninsta: jackharlow not the way this back pain is set up. I can't be on all fours.

urbanwyatt: y/ninsta exhibit A above says otherwise

y/ninsta: urbanwyatt you are supposed to be getting me cheese fries

jackharlow: urbanwyatt you better NOT

urbanwyatt: jackharlow too late, already here!

saweetie: AYE FUCK IT UP BESTIE!

y/ninsta: thank you to neelamthadhani for getting me more make up so I can be a bad bitch around the house too. bad bitches get no days off

jackharlow: y/ninsta my baby is a bad bitch anyway, but carry on

y/ninsta: jackharlow don't make me cry. I haven't cried in 6 hours and that's my longest streak

danivalentine: SIX HOURS?!

urbanwyatt: because six hours ago, 2forwoyne drank all the iced tea and she wanted some and of course who gets yelled at?! me and jack because 2fo was nowhere to be found

jackharlow: y/ninsta come sit on my face then

y/ninsta: jackharlow no I'm the size of the titanic

lilnasx: y/ninsta bitch please shut up, the titanic?!

normani: y/ninsta bitch you better scream jack I won't let go until he has your legs shaking. JACK DRAW HER LIKE ONE OF YOUR FRENCH GIRLS!

jackharlow: normani I don't have no fucking french girls, don't get me in trouble lmaooo you know her ass takes shit too literal sometimes smh

urbanwyatt: jack can't draw anyway. have you seen his stick figures?

quiiso: LMAOOOOOO

jackharlow: urbanwyatt OUTTA POCKET!

theestallion: did y/n actually turn down her husband eating her out?

y/ninsta: NO I DID NOT TURN IT DOWN I JUST SAID I WASN'T GOING TO SIT ON HIS FACE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO PUT ALL MY WEIGHT ON HIM

jackharlow: y/ninsta you act like I give a fuck about that. get your ass upstairs now and wait for me and I'm not fucking playing with you.

dualipa: oh damn. even jackharlow got me hot. SHIT.

y/ninsta: jackharlow YES DADDY, ON MY WAY!

Taglist:

@harlowsbby

@babyharleezy

@hoodharlow

@stefansalvatoresgf

@jackiehollanderr

@primadxna-girl

@dessmxsworld

@cockslutslurper3000

@raelorns21

@variety-fangirl

@gbaabyyyy

@kamorsstuff

@harlowthot

@sinsandsuccubus

@curlyhairclub

@bootlegroach

@haylexo10

@thinkingaboutjharlow

@fluidsentiment

@charli123456789

@moody4world

@yourstrulymayah

@yana4life

@beanbagbitch

@alinaharlow

@carma-fanficaddict

@minaxcarter

@arination99

@xjup1t3r

@venusvinc

@jacksmoviestar

@jackharloww

@midnight-star47

@minkookie95

@inluvwithladybug

@exoticr0ses

@jharlowsangels

@jackierose902109

@jackmansbabymama

@cmalass

@megawhoree

@softtcurse

@sia2raw

@miniaturehideoutmentality

@hoya122

@nattinatalia

@jackslover12

@skyesthebomb

@jackharlows-world

@louisianalady

@fdl305

@automaticpeachsong

@harlowcomehome

@gassyandsassy1

@babygirlwilly

@amethyst09

@harrycanyonmoonn

@toocriticalharlow

@tattered-tales

@sisiking99

@dessxoxsworld

@gillybear17

@jacksdaycare

@iheartharlow

@disaster-rose

@babyvinnie

@evansxchalamet

@chtkmyharlow​

@itsyagirljaz

@neon-lights-and-glitter

@awhore4moree

[dvskf4llz]

Hello there! I always do enjoy finding more Hermitcraft x reader content as there never seems to be a good amount at times.

Anywhoosle, could I possibly get a Rendog x reader(fem or gender neutral, your choice) where it is nothing but fluff? Like, he comforts reader after a very bad day they had(I have had the worst day ever in my life so far, and have been watching Ren's videos to brighten my spirits)

Thanks, and take your time with the request, no rush or hurry.

Heck yeah!! I find so much comfort through Ren's videos aswell! He's my number one comfort YouTuber‼️

Anyways enjoy this little oneshot :3

I srsly need to stop forgetting to post 😭😭

Rough days

𝓡𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓸𝓰 𝔁 𝓖𝓝!𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓭𝓮𝓻

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Summary: The reader has been having quite the bad days as of recently, their lover Ren had noticed this so he decided to comfort them and reassure them that everything will be okay <3

Type: Fluffy oneshot, romantic (I'm so sorry if you wanted platonic-)

Warnings ⚠: no warnings, just slight angst to fluff/hurt to comfort

Proofread: nah (I don't think it'll ever be)

This is a bit rushed once more bc my dumbass keeps forgetting to post.. Also I only just found out now how to add the 'read more' thing after posting for about a year now 😭😭

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As of recently, you'd been feeling down mentally. For a few days now, nothing had been going too good for you. You'd been constantly getting pulled around to help things with the Hermits, you barely got any time to yourself. Not to mention, you had quite the building projects that were in the works. Though, due to you having to help the Hermits you barely had any time to work on your own stuff. And not only did you struggle with bringing different animals to different pens, they would somehow end up escaping when you weren't looking! You had quite the long days.

At the end of the week, you had finally thought that you could take a break. But as soon as you were about to just lay down for a bit, you end up hearing a 'ding' from your communicator. You were about to just absolutely lose it, but you decided to stay calm for now and see who it was. It was Gem, she had asked you to help with a part of her build. You, wanting to be a good friend just accepted because you struggled with saying no.

And so, you made your way out of the base and headed over to Gem's. Ren on the otherhand who had been building outside, watched you leave the house a bit aggressively. He had a concerned expression on his face as he watched you slowly walk more and more farther away, he knew something was up. He was going to find out what was bothering you because no way in heck was he going to let his lover be all frowny.

While you thought this whole thing would only take like 30 minutes or so, you were absolutely wrong. The small part of Gem's build took a whole 3 HOURS because Gem kept on changing her mind throughout the whole thing, you had been trying so hard not to just lose it right then and there. You wanted to be a good friend to Gem so of course, you helped her with her constant changing of this part of her build. By the time you were finally done and heading back home, it started raining.

"How could this day get even worse at this point?" You groaned in annoyance as you continued walking back home with no umbrella or hood because you didn't know it was going to rain today, things just HAD to not go your way today... What made things worse was that when you arrived infront of your base, you noticed a fence missing and also your cows missing. Yikes. It was so hard not to just start raging right now.

So after you finally got your cows back, you stepped inside of the house and practically almost fell down face forward. You would've actually fell if Ren hadn't been there to catch you on time, he had been waiting in front of the door for a bit now. He could already see just how soaked you were from having to be in the rain for so long, he lead you over to the couch and grabbed some towels quickly. He soon had returned with some fluffy and thick towels and began to help dry you off, he had also made you to grab some of your clothes for you to change into so that you wouldn't have wet clothes on your body the whole time. He would rather not have his partner be sick!! Also, he'd definitely make a light hearted joke about you looking like a soaked wet cat.

Once you had started to change your clothes, Ren would close his eyes to respect you. Even if you said it was fine, he still didn't open his eyes (maybe he'd peak his eyes out once but only that one time). Ren did not want to make you uncomfortable in any way, he loved you too much to do that to you. So after you were done changing, he finally opened his eyes and pulled you close to him. He'd hug you tightly, but not tight enough to hurt you. Again, he loves you so much so he would never do anything to hurt you.

Ren was about to cuddle you on the couch, but then realized it would probably be too uncomfortable for you so he decided to carry you back to your guys' shared room. If you didn't want to be carried though, he'd just gently take your hand and lead you over to the bedroom. He'd set you down on the bed so you'd be laying down, him then laying down next to you as well and holding you close.

If he were to see you still upset, he'd first reassure you by saying something like:

"Everything's going to be just fine alright? Things may have not gone your way today, but at least the next day might be better."

If it wasn't enough, he'd make a joke that's either suggestive/flirty to make you smile or just meant to make you laugh (not writing anything for this because idk how to do sht like that 😭)

Ren would be such a cuddle bear towards you the whole time you're in bed, he would not let you get out even if one of the Hermits had been asking you to help them once more. He would probably just take your communicator and type the Hermit a quick and 'polite' message mention how you were busy with him and would place your communicator aside, away from your reach.

Ren was NOT going to allow you to continue to overwork yourselves with all the Hermits' favors, you needed a break. And a cuddle session was what he figured you needed, afterall you two also haven't been able to spend quality time together so this was working out quite a lot.

Overall, you managed to get enough rest and also just be with Ren for the day. You were protestant at first, but now you were enjoying the cuddle session and shared kisses from time to time.

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WEEWOW!!! YOU GOT TO THE ENDING!! hope y'all enjoyed it as per usual, I'm editing this tmr as it is currently 12 am for me rn‼️‼️ I don't like how short this is so yeah probably will update this soon

Anyways, hope you guys have been doing better and been taking care of yourself! Bye bye for now reader!

[carlyraejepsans]

you just mentioned in the tags ''toriel stopping sans from [cutting the humans' journey short] by killing them'' ive always wondered, do you think sans would actually have killed the human if he hadnt made the promise to toriel? i think you mentioned once that the ''youd be dead where you stand'' moment is another one of sans fumbling attempts to seem threatening but despite that, do you think he wouldve actually done it ? if hed seen them kill monsters or during a pacifist run? or do you think it wouldve played out similarly to canon in the genocide route or that he wouldve been just less involved with the human during their journey in a pacifist run?

(ok i found this in my drafts and I don't remember where i was going with this, but i kinda went off so have this as it is lol)

i keep 5 versions of sans that are Ever So Slightly Different According to How I Interpret Different Details simultaneously rotating in my brain at all times. so uhhhhh yes and no.

jokes aside, I'm starting to gravitate more towards the interpretation that like... the threat he made at the restaurant? full on jackassery. shithead extraordinaire. he WAS messing with us.

but would he have tried to kill a human if toriel hadn't made him promise otherwise?

...yeah i think so. let me elaborate

here's the thing though: i think people put way too much weight on that! i mean it's a fighting RPG, every single other character—bar toriel—fights you to either capture and have you sent to the capital or to kill you themselves. either way they want your SOUL. papyrus... is his own neutral case here with his refusal to kill you.

my point being: every monster you meet wants to fight you. it's through that fight (or what happens afterwards) that you actively challenge their point of view and befriend them.

you don't go through this with sans. he never fights you, so you never need to change his mind because that belief was challenged before we even got to the underground, through toriel's words alone. that's... kind of admirable?

but it does frame his actions in a very creepy way from our point of view in-game. not to forget his dumbass scary pranks. because we go from someone a bit mysterious though ultimately friendly and goofy whom we thought we could trust, to someone who openly tells us he could've been a threat for us... and then never delivers. at least, not in any playthrough where we hear that line of dialogue.

so much of sans' character and appearance stems from tonal dissonance. he's shamelessly comfortable in the game's tone and vibes, but still stands out as an outsider. he plainly doesn't play by the same rules as everyone else, so we don't judge him by the same standards, either.

even more, if he actually kept his promise the way toriel meant it, that would've meant playing the entire game like a tutorial. sure, you can enjoy the story, but did you enjoy playing the section in the RUINs when she's with us? it's basically handholding the entire time. it's BORING for us, and ultimately, Undertale is a game! so it should be enjoyable to its player. which brings me to our next point:

ultimately... yeah maybe he would've tried to kill us. and yes it is kinda shitty that he only kept his promise by not doing that. in a sans characteristic troll way, i mean. but acting like the "sans was happy to watch a baby get beat up and killed" jokes are, well, anything other than jokes is just a plain bad reading. forget about post pacifist. during a gameplay, frisk IS the Human IS us IS the PLAYER. which means capable of RESET and SAVE. which means essentially immortal, at the end of the day. it's the "special power" sans tells us about in his judgement. you can't treat us with the same moral lenses as an NPC. the power we hold over their world in the game is lovecraftian. we can literally destroy it entirely, an outcome that was scientifically predicted by some characters in the game...

...sans being one of them. every interaction with you, every joke and every hand extended in friendship and eye closed to your shenanigans. all of it, the good and the not-so-good. it's all colored with the knowledge that the "human" in front of him could end the world. whether you actually do that or not.

this is one of my favorite moments in the canon. one time. one second where the mask slips and we see through the cracks in the façade of laid back confidence. and what we see is a mirror, held up to our face.

and it's fucking terrifying.

"waaaa sans is bad because he lets us die" boo-FUCKING-hoo brother! cry me a river then throw ice cubes in it. mans goes through all of this on the daily and still gives us a chance, you should be thanking him.

i have a few other opinions on this topic that i feel are relevant, but I don't feel like putting them into a coherent argument so I'll just list them instead:

there are some collateral factors that i think would've prevented him from killing us outside of toriel's promise. mainly the fact that papyrus was feeling down and meeting a real human would've cheered him up. then he would've befriended us because of course he would, and of course sans wasn't going to kill his brother's new bestie.

so would he have fought us in a pacifist or papyrus-friendly netral run? maybe not! but he WOULD'VE whooped ass sooner if things got out of hand.

it's kind of a given that sans figures out you can manipulate time very early into the game. he works for/with asgore, who knows from first-hand child-murder experiences that it's an ability humans have, he's a scientist who studied the space-time continuum of their world and he's a friend of alphys', the royal scientist who studied human souls and determination (and let's not even get into his connections to gaster). he's a bright lad. he put two and two together.

while he COULD have seen taking a humans' soul as a necessary evil for monsterkind's freedom (promise to toriel aside) he openly sympathized with the anomaly. he's not there to be a time cop. he just wants to avoid the literal annihilation of the universe.

[...? yeah i never continued this. still stands tho.]

[turtlesandfrogs]

A basic starter project if you want to start growing your own food but have no money & no experience, assuming you like green onions.

Supplies needed: Dead potted plant from free pile/dumpster/friend or family member, used food container, green onion ends.

Steps:

1. Remove lid from container, it's now your plant pot's saucer

2. Either poke holes very carefully and slowly (not ideal) or slice the corners off with scissors (better)

3. Remove soil from the dead plant's pot, put in container. This one was super heavy in perlite (the white stuff, helps with drainage), so I mixed in another pot that had more organic matter (brown stuff, mostly helps retain moisture, sometimes provides nutrients). Water until water comes out the bottom, then let drain in sink until until it's done. Put pot on lid:

4. Stick the green onions in, deep enough that they can stand up on their own, or until the white part is covered:

5. Stick in window, water when dry, and wait:

Why not just stick them in water?

Because they make the water really smelly.

Just change the water often, then it won't stink.

I will forget, and then it will stink. Plus, I prefer growing in soil.

Why do you prefer soil?

Thanks for asking! I started because growing them in water didn't work well for me. But on top of that, if you regrow in water, eventually their growth will peter out. This is because in addition to water and carbon dioxide, plants need other nutrients. These are stored in the bulbs of green onions, but they will be depleted by growth if the plant can't replace them. Potting soil often has leftover nutrients, and if you've got compost you can also mix that in.

Why not just put fertilizer in the water?

Two reasons. First off, that's a great way to grow algea, unless you make sure the water isn't getting light. Secondly, most cheap, widely available fertilizers are meant to be used for plants that are in soil, so they're not complete (they're missing iron and maybe some other things? It's been a while since i looked it up). So eventually, if you use water and normal ferts, the plant will stop growing. If you have access to hydroponic ferts, those would work, but you also have enough money that you're not the target audience for this post.

I don't trust the potting soil from random plants.

Completely understandable, and probably smart too. In that case, you have a couple other options if you want soil for free. First off, you could look for dead vegetable or other edible plants in pots, and know that those will not have been treated with something that makes them inedible to humans. You can also look for free bags of partially used potting soil in your local buy-nothing/free stuff groups/craigslist/nextdoor/mutual aid groups.

What if I have some money for soil?

Then you can look for potting soil, or make your own (plenty of recipes online for this)

Help! There are tiny flies that look like fruit flies!

Those are probably fungus gnats, and there's plenty of ways to get rid of them. My two favorites are watering a bit less and adding half an inch of sand to the top, making your plants an unsuitable habitat, or getting a mosquito dunk and keeping it in your watering can. Mosquito dunks have Bt, a type of bacteria that kills mosquitos, fungus gnats, and other related insects. There are other types of Bt that go after other types of insect, such as cabbage moths. It's considered an organic treatment.

What about other pests?

I've literally never seen them get other pests indoors.

How much light do they need?

As much as you can give them, probably. If you have a window that gets midday sun, use that. Or a grow light. If they don't get enough light, they'll be floppy and pale, still edible, but not as flavorful.

When can I harvest?

When it wouldn't look silly to harvest them. I generally wait until they're at least a foot tall (30cm). I'll post an update when I do.

Why didn't you just use the dead plant's pot, dumbass?

A) it didn't have a saucer to protect the surface underneath, B) this is a concept post, and often plant pots are too wide to fit in window sills, and C) I didn't like the pot.

Won't it just grow into a bulb?

Nope, green onions are actually usually a different type than bulbing onions. Usually. And they're perennial! I've never had one try forming a bulb, but you can just eat them if yours do.

Can I ask you another question?

Yep! I'll add it to the update.