#my death vision is highly specific

[nakeurnez]

[notbecauseofvictories]

I'm still thinking about it, so---if you're a local, I highly encourage Rough House Theater's "House of the Exquisite Corpse". It's lovely, arresting, from the performances down to the smallest touches. I still can't get over the ripped umbrellas hanging upside down in dreamlike suspension from the ceiling; the way each "station" is wrapped in plywood and decorated in its own meaningful pattern and design.

But first, let me step back. "House of the Exquisite Corpse" takes its name from the old Surrealist parlor game, at the heart of which is the idea that you can collect a disparate group, then smash their ideas together and create something from the smithereens. This is something like what Rough House has done, which is pick a theme ("Superstition") and then let the artistic groups loose to create short scenes built around that theme.

(I want to call them tableaux, because watching the performances I was struck by how it felt like something out of time---as though we were 17th century courtiers in Paris ushered into a candlelit ballroom, or early 20th century farmers in Minnesota, paying our penny to see what the circus brought to town.)

The set-up itself does a wonderful job ushering you into a time-outside-of-time---you step into a space divided from the rest of the space by black sheets, chunky headsets dangling from wooden ladders suspended just over your head. The emcee is carrying a clipboard and speaks into an old-school broadcasting mic---which you can only hear if you're wearing the headsets.

It is, you'll discover, the central conceit of the performance. From there, you're directed from station to station by silent ushers, carrying flashlights so they can point you forward. Unless you are wearing the headphones at each station, you can only listen to the absent, ambient music echoing around the room.

Not only are the stations set up to wrap you in a specific soundscape, but they play with your vision too---most stations have you peer through holes or cracks in the wall, though one station had us line up in front of mirrors and watch the reflection of the performance, while another station placed shards of glass at every peephole, so you watched the scene and the character's experience of the scene in a strange double-vision. A couple of the stations used tricks of the light---strobe effects that made the puppets' movements seem even more uncanny or imply violence; a haze of smoke or fabric to disguise the human "prowling" in the puppet-shape of a tiger.

(I always like when I can tell an artist is reacting to something I've seen before, and the Rousseau "The Dream" vibes in that scene were exquisite.)

I will say that “A White Bird in the House is an Omen of Death” was my favorite, not in the least because it featured a whole choreographed song (feat. a lovely articulated owl puppet, plus some very effective shadowplay work). However, “Through the Looking Glass” was beautifully up my alley, from the unique staging---this was the station where you watched the performance in a mirror---to the creative puppetry, and a meditation on loveliness that had some bite to it. “Broken Mirror” was more traditional in its puppet work, but it also had the most elaborate staging, a fully-realized world in miniature.

I keep going back to how enormously creative so many of these artists were, in ways I simply can't ignore. “Step on a Crack” didn't necessarily work for me, but I can't stop thinking about it---its trippy setup, the inhuman knit masks the creator used; the spines dangling, neon-colored, from the nearest tree as the protagonist recited lines about loving his mother with increasing, feverish and horrible energy. The glimpses I got during “An ill fate befalls those who pluck from fruit in their dreams” of the puppeteer's face---how she shut her eyes and turned away, as though she too was affected by the puppet's horror.

[miraevanlynch]

📜METATRON’S MESSIAH RECIPE THEORY📜

You thought I’d stopped replaying the grueling ending of episode 6? Nope, quite the contrary. I’ve watched it so many times that I’ve come up with a new conspiracy theory about Metatron’s motives and Aziraphale’s choice at the end of season two. This is just my speculation, so read it for entertainment. The article is very long, so please bear with me.

“Does anyone choose death?” – Metatron.

Surely, you’ve asked the same question as I have: “Why Aziraphale?” Why our angel, a “traitor” to his side, a low-ranking Principality, often seen as foolish, weak, and despised by his colleagues, was chosen by Metatron to become the Supreme Archangel, second only to God?

I’ve read many theories suggesting that the position of Supreme Archangel is merely titular, that Aziraphale will become a puppet in Metatron’s hands, allowing him full control. By separating the angel from Crowley, their combined strength would be diminished, ensuring the “Second Coming” goes smoothly without any hindrances. This theory made sense to me until I remembered the “Book of Life,” capable of erasing any entity with a single stroke.

And Metatron, the angel with full access to that book, could easily have erased Aziraphale and Crowley’s names, making them never exist. This indicates that Metatron’s plan goes beyond merely controlling the Ineffable Husbands' miracle; perhaps the scheme to separate them is deeper. Aziraphale and Crowley might actually be crucial to his plan, not just obstacles Metatron wishes to eliminate.

Anyone here read Frank Herbert’s Dune or watched its film adaptations? If so, you’d recognize two things:

1. Faith is the most powerful soft power, capable of wiping out armies. Nothing is more fearsome than an army of fanatics with unshakeable faith.

2. To have unity, you need religion and ideals. For religion and ideals to exist, you need an epic, a legend about “the chosen one.”

In season two, Heaven is depicted as highly fragmented, with Michael and Uriel vying for the Supreme Archangel position, Gabriel’s memory being wiped, and even Saraqael and Muriel aiding Crowley, a demon and their common enemy. Heaven is experiencing a severe personnel crisis, possibly even worse than Hell’s (at least Hell isn’t plagued by infighting).

As the King of Angels, overseeing Heaven, what should Metatron do to address this urgent problem, especially with the “Second Coming” looming, and both Heaven and Hell preparing for a great war? A disunited heavenly army lacking faith and bickering over personal gains is not what Metatron desires. He needs to unify them before the Holy War to ensure victory.

Metatron realizes the angels need a new leader, someone to rekindle their dead faith in God, unite them under one ideal, and lead them to a vision of heaven’s ultimate triumph, performing miracles no other angel can.

That’s when Metatron decides to go to Earth to find Aziraphale.

But why Aziraphale? We haven’t answered this question yet, have we? Why must Aziraphale become the Supreme Archangel, why is he “the chosen one”?

Simply because Metatron saw extraordinary qualities in him. The qualities of a heavenly “Messiah.” But what are the qualities of a Messiah? And what specifically has Aziraphale done to fulfill them? I’ll list some rather coincidental, perhaps eerily coincidental, details to support the idea that Aziraphale fits the messianic archetype, or even Jesus Christ.

To become a savior, one needs:

1. To perform extraordinary feats that no one else can: Jesus walked on water, prophesied, and healed. Aziraphale, in Heaven’s eyes, is the only angel who survived hellfire (like Paul Atreides surviving the Water of Life in Dune), prevented the Apocalypse, and persuaded the Antichrist, Adam. He understands human ways and Earth, something the other bureaucratic angels can’t grasp.

2. To have high ideals and absolute loyalty to the Almighty: This is evident in Jesus. For Aziraphale, it’s his unwavering faith in Heaven’s inherent goodness, his belief in God, and, crucially, his desire to reform Heaven’s corrupt bureaucracy that oppresses low-ranking angels while the higher-ups fight each other. (This echoes the plight of the Jews under harsh rulers and their prayers for a savior like Moses or Jesus. In Dune, the Fremen yearn for their Lisan Al Gaib to lead them to a Green Paradise. Angels are akin to the Jews or Fremen, longing for faith and salvation.)

3. To be compassionate, bearing the world’s sins: Jesus bore the hatred of the very people he sought to save but always forgave their sins. In Dune, Paul Atreides endured severe trials on Arrakis to earn the Fremen’s trust. Similarly, Aziraphale, despite Heaven’s mistreatment, holds no grudges and is ready to reform it for a brighter future for all.

4. To be “betrayed” by someone trusted and willing to sacrifice everything to save the world: This is the interesting part. After Metatron targeted Aziraphale, who bravely asked God about the Great Plan (in season 1) and fought for his ideals, he likely planned to turn the angel into an epic saint, a true religious leader for his military ends. Remember Metatron’s question at the café:

“Does anyone choose death?”

The answer is yes. The Messiah chooses death to save everyone. Jesus chose crucifixion, knowing it would redeem the world. Paul Atreides drank the lethal Water of Life to become the Mahdi of the Fremen. And how do you push a saint into such despair, making them endure all pain to highlight their virtues, leading people to follow them and unite under their faith?

Every story needs a villain to highlight the hero’s virtues.

And both angels and demons hate traitors.

Jesus was betrayed by Judas, his close disciple, whom he trusted, someone with latent evil but whom he always forgave. Judas wanted a violent revolution, a physical liberation, contrary to Jesus’ “spiritual revolution.” Judas betrayed Jesus with a kiss.

And Aziraphale, excited about realizing his ideal of improving Heaven, was “betrayed” by the one he loved and trusted most, someone seen as a sinner but always recognized for his inner goodness. Crowley preferred “physical freedom” by fleeing to the stars, rejecting “freedom of thought,” which required resolving all potential threats. Crowley betrayed Aziraphale with a kiss.

After enduring all physical and mental agony, our Messiah will leave the mortal realm, forsaking all worldly pleasures to return to Heaven, where they save all beings.

So, from the perspective of other angels, the story of a “Messiah” Aziraphale with miraculous powers, grand ideals, a compassionate heart ready to forgive all sins, willing to bear hatred, pain, and the ultimate betrayal to lead everyone to a New Heaven, is skillfully crafted by Metatron. This legend will spread among the angels, inspiring them to follow their Supreme Archangel with renewed faith. They’ll believe in God again, more united than ever, ready to wield their flaming swords against Hell. Michael and Uriel will no longer oppose their new leader, and no angel will doubt this propaganda, as they lack the knowledge of manipulation, and they’ve been subservient for too long.

By then, Aziraphale has completed his function, whether he resists or tries to stop it. It’s too late, as the angels only need a legend, a prophecy to believe in. Aziraphale has become that legend through Metatron’s orchestration. Like Paul Atreides, he becomes an unwilling saint, a Messiah without a choice, manipulated by those behind the scenes like the Bene Gesserit or Metatron. They only need a story, someone to ignite faith for battle. Thus, Heaven has a battle-ready army with unprecedented resolve for the Great War between Heaven and Hell. Metatron has achieved his goal. Perhaps the protagonist of the “Second Coming” isn’t Jesus or any other son of the Almighty but rather the return of the once-militant Heaven, which banished the fallen angels to Hell. Heaven will return to Earth on Judgment Day with their Supreme Archangel, who understands humanity to commence the reckoning, wielding enough power to face his hereditary enemy, the First Sinner, the Serpent of Eden, new Prince of Hell, who betrayed him with a kiss…

It will be a terrifying prospect.

Aziraphale only wanted to bring Heaven to Crowley. And now, he has brought “Heaven” to everyone.

Nothing lasts forever, nothing IS forever.

And that’s Metatron’s recipe for creating a Messiah, by Heaven’s most powerful weapon – Faith.

END.

[tellmeallaboutit]

The big three bosses of writing

Plot

I'm always amazed at how hard it is to create a compelling story, preferably one that feels like it hasn't been written a thousand times before. When I think of my favourite films and books, it's the great story that I remember. It doesn't have to have a lot of twists or be complicated, just memorable execution (which usually involves a fresh take / recontextualizing the same old tropey stories).

Kudos to those who can create a non-linear, compelling story; I am already struggling with a classic three arc structure.

Pacing

Pacing is so hard because it's such a fingertip feeling. Good pacing involves a myriad of decisions about which scene to extend, which to skip, where to focus, what to leave in and, most importantly, what to leave out. It's even harder in the age of ADHD and rapid dopamine, where both readers and writers can't concentrate on anything for a single minute.

I think my over-reliance on cliffhangers, shock scenes, sex scenes, is very much down to the fact that I cannot bear to be bored for three paragraphs straight.

Prose

I am a sucker for beautiful, original prose. It's a joy to come across a metaphor or a line you've never heard before. I am in awe of how some can conjure up a 5D vision with just a few words. I've noticed that I like prose when it's highly specific, contextual and slightly provocative. Compare: "pale yellow" vs. "sickly yellow" vs. "death cell yellow".

I have a habit of writing down phrases I like, but I can only imitate them, not create them from scratch.

[aquaquadrant]

What do other Hells players think of these “join” messages? They have got to be utterly unheard of right? I’m just imagining spawn swarming with confused players brave or stupid enough to go check it out.

(Sorry if it’s been asked before)

no worries, i’ve talked abt this before but it never hurts to explain (plus it can be hard to find stuff in my asks tag hagsjdhsj)

the state of chat in hels is something i’m afraid i haven’t done the best job portraying in the fics, for the sake of not taking up unnecessary space. but basically, hels is such a large and highly-populated world that even tho no one really uses chat to actually TALK, it’s always bumping with messages: achievements, join messages, and frequent deaths (there are no ‘leave’ messages when players exit thru a portal tho bc hels has that disabled). most players have their comm notifs set to whispers only (tho atlas has set his to notify join messages too). cuz in this fictional setting, chat exists only on a communicator rather than popping up in the corner of a player’s vision; they’d have to be actively looking at their comm to see it.

so realistically, most hels players wouldn’t notice repeated join messages like that (ofc, the guys in our story have very specific reasons to pay attention to that sort of thing). and there have been rare instances where a group of kids spawned in all at once, leading to an influx of join messages like that (prob not QUITE as many tho), so ppl would prob make that assumption in this case. now, i’m sure there were some who noticed and were curious enough to check out spawn, only to be confused when it was empty, but in terms of large-scale effects that would have on the world… unclear.

even if there were players who realized what was going on and suspected that portals were involved, the somewhat isolated nature of the many communities within hels (and the hostile nature of its players) would make it difficult for that information to spread very far, at least not in a timely manner. and lots of hels residents are too busy living their own chaotic lives to take notice of odd things in chat like this, so as of right now, it’s just business as usual.

[castlebyersafterdark]

it's killing me not knowing what henry wants from will yet! i can just imagine the tense energy between them when they finally meet. it's such a long time coming

We talk so much about Byler this aspect often gets forgotten! Or, when talking about Henry it's the focus of "Vecna visions" and tormenting Will and Mike with each other - and, hmmm. Maybe we are surely getting some of that. But I don't think we're going to get as much of the now common fanon tropes as we thought over the last few years. I think we'll see divergence somehow from the Pennywise/Freddie Kruger style nightmare visions again, we've already done that. Some, but it's not going to rehash season 4 completely. It feels like most think Henry's going to be spending all his time playing Mike and Will off each other with constant visions and taunting and I just think Henry's got other shit going on other than playing sadistic Sims with the resident queers for his own amusement.

I'm really confused as to what Henry wants now that we have the Holly factor, to be honest. It's thrown me and I'm not sure what my theories are now with her in the mix, since we've seen Holly in that fancy dress as Henry appears to her in young, human form on set and with whatever happens in the scene in her bedroom.

Setting that aside because this is an admitted gap in my theories - I think it's safe to assume that Will is going to meet this version as well. What a waste if not!! It's so chilling for Will to learn it wasn't truly just some monster - that was a man. It's always been a man. I'm sure that's incredibly disturbing for someone like him, who he is, the things he's always been told/heard about himself. Wondering how far the implications will go in season 5. What a conversation will mean. Henry was after El's power as we saw in season 4, real time and flashbacks - but then Will comes into the picture in between. What did he see? Why was Will specifically targeted? What power does he hold that Henry wants? There's gotta be more. The whole theory of his victims becoming "part of him" and how in season one we saw Will kidnapped and held near death with the vine in season 1 - what is the plan, man???? Henry killed the others, but does his plans long term mean he's going to keep Will alive? It seemed Will was close to death in season one, and all the others were killed, but in season 2 through the possession it was very clear "Not me. Everyone else." Is Will to be a host, a new human form?

I still feel like Will can create things in ways that Henry or El cannot. I think Will is the Bridge, maybe?? That's an episode title, right? The link between the real world and the Upside Down, and Will is going to be what Henry uses to come into the real world and unleash what ever hell he plans - what is the plan? What physically is he going to do to the real world? He can mentally manipulate perceptions of reality and create mindscapes and control the monsters? Is Will going to be able to control the monsters as well? How would something like the shadow form of the Mindflayer work in the real world? Is this where it's going to appear like some giant dragon, or is there another creature entirely? What can that Vecna version even do on earth now? Blending the dimensions? My brain is a hurricane. I've read a lot of wild theory and cool, interesting analysis and part of my problem is that I don't necessarily agree with much I've seen, even if highly intriguing, but while having only vague ideas myself.

Anyway. On the specific. Need Henry monologuing and bothering Will. Need him haunting his visions. Need him taunting him as the attractive younger version of himself, getting into Will's head, making him promises and threats and doing so in such a way that it's agonizing, but it is tempting. I need Will to be conflicted and disgusted but he's so self-sacrificial that he does get close to caving to protect his loved ones, but he doesn't, but oooh, he might. Just. All over the place. And people constantly there to bring him back to the light, to valuing himself, learning the extent of how he's loved. All that great stuff. Mental battles between Will and Henry. He's tied up, mentally trying to break away but frozen in the real world. Need Will possessed again and the worst he feared happens - that he's a threat, he's a danger, he tried to do something to hurt - but everyone proves he's worth saving over and over, always. There's so much mileage we can get with this concept.

Do we remember all those scenes we got early on in filming I think at the radio station with the screaming and yelling run and how in the feature video we had the directors having Will go into a choking position? Forgot about all that until right now. Ready for it ready for it ready for it...

[fictionalworldsarelife]

***** MINOR TOG SPOILERS *****

So part of this ToG series re-read is being able to pick up on things that I never noticed before / didn’t realise the ironicness of a situation or the foreshadowing because I didn’t know the outcome before. When i tell you there is too much foreshadowing to mention everything I mean there is. so. much. foreshadowing. and. hints. EVERYWHERE. and they aren’t even spoiler foreshadowing or hints, they are just small things like subtly hinting at Celaena’s heritage both book 1 & 2 or the foreshadowing of Kaltain’s death a book beforehand, so on, so forth.

One that I’ve just read and hadn’t put together even after the few re-reads i’ve done, is after Nehemia has died and Celaena has been placed in the dungeon. Chaol and Dorian are having a moment on the servants steps when Chaol is telling Dorian about the events leading up to Nehemia’s death, specifically when Chaol doesn’t understand how Celaena could run faster than a horse and before Celaena goes to the warehouse she describes her ‘killing calm’ and that even Arobynn didn’t realise how calm she could get when she went over the edge.

My theory is that when she slips into the ultra ‘killing calm’ (not just her regular killing calm), she somehow unlocks part of her Fae heritage and while the dampen on magic means she can’t fully shift, somehow a little bit of it seeps out and makes her vision better, her breath more stable, legs faster and stronger - basically everything she would get from the shift but on a smaller but still noticeable scale that allows her to run faster than a horse.

Side note - don’t get me wrong she is still strong, fast and more than capable of killing without it (i mean she’s a highly trained assassin for gods sake) but it’s just enhances her

[not-poignant]

Is it just me or is censorship all across social media getting really bad lately? Pinterest just removed a whole bunch of my pins for sexual content - they were all fully clothed queer men and women showing vague intimacy, nothing overtly sexual at all. Like one they removed was literally just two men's heads leaning on each other. That's wacko right??? Have I missed something big going on?

Tbh it's been getting increasingly terrible for a long time, anon, it's not a lately thing, it's been since before the Tumblr purge, and it is at least in some part due to the SESTA/FOSTA law that got passed in the USA, and the increasing passing of laws in many countries that are specifically concerned with removing net neutrality and treating all of us like 3 year olds.

It will get worse, not better. And you've probably been missing a few big things! It sounds like you were most directly impacted by what happened with Pinterest, so you've just noticed it. Many of us noticed it around 2018 with the Tumblr purge. Some of us have been impacted by elements of it way earlier, due to Livejournal's Strikethrough which necessitated the invention of Dreamwidth and helped to really get AO3 off the ground. And this was back even before we now have many laws that scare a lot of big companies into removing adult content.

Steve Jobs famously hated / loathed pornography and was on a mission to literally try and remove it from the internet, and part of that mission was to - as much as possible - make it nearly impossible for apps that have it to get listed in the Apple store. This is partly why AO3 doesn't have an app. This is why Dreamwidth doesn't have an app. This is why the Tumblr Purge happened - so they could continue to have an app. And while some sites don't get targeted, as soon as you do get targeted by the Apple store, it's either 'provide your legal identity to prove that you're the age you say you are' to access adult content or it's 'goodbye adult content.'

We've also had an increasing rise of morally panicked, puritanical TERF-informed anti-shippers who believe that their emotional reactions to fictional content they find troubling are firstly valid moral judgements, and secondly, a valid reason to abuse, bully and send death threats to real people. And these people basically work hand-in-hand (often without realising) with extremely powerful Evangelical Christians who have government influence and a lot of money in the USA and literally work to change laws to make it reflect an extremely puritanical vision they have of the future. You know, the homphobic, transphobic, misogynistic, racist, kinkphobic, bigoted, antisemitic etc. etc. etc. one. (It's highly ironic and tragic that most antis are young and queer and just extremely uneducated).

I'd say people notice based on what impacted them directly. So some of us realised in 2007. Some of us realised again in 2018. And since then there's been a lot of blows from a lot of sites. In a way, Pinterest is joining an already very bloated bandwagon of sites cornered in the manner. The reason why people say 'unalive' these days instead of suicide, or 'r@pe' these days instead of rape is because of Tiktok censors. The reason so many folks moved their adult fanart and art accounts off Instagram, or they've gone dead, is because of Instagram censors. The reason so many adult writers on Patreon are very careful about what explicit words they write directly onto the site is because of Patreon censorship.

After all this, it's possible that Pinterest has a bug and are implementing a new AI algorithm for detecting adult content, and it's just broken. In those cases, reporting and appealing actually often does help. When Tumblr first implemented their algorithm, it wasn't very well trained yet, and like, pictures of fruit etc. were being banned because the AI algorithm was still figuring out what to do. Tumblr was in a rush in order to keep the app in the Apple store (over 70% of their income is from app users, the site would have literally died if they didn't act quickly), and so they ended up with an extremely overzealous and initially broken (and still sometimes broken x.x) algorithm.

If Pinterest is going through something similar, either with the app store or with having to address a sudden legal change, they may be having algo problems, and reporting will help them train the algorithm better.

Trust me, there will be people behind the scenes - staff at all of these websites - who hate the changes as much as you do, even if they can't say so for professional reasons. But even the new owner of Tumblr got pretty close to saying 'it fucking sucks but we have to do it if you want the site to exist' (which honestly made it a lot more...possible to handle the change, because it's not usually the sites you have to hate/resent, but the laws getting changed around you. Also if anyone here is an adult and can do so - please vote!!!)

[coyoteprince]

Would you like to share what happened in Savannah? After my own paranormal experience I am fond of listening to/reading other people's!

For general public disclaimer, I'm aware this is woo-woo, but I have had a life-long relationship with death and many ghosts experiences, despite not looking for them. My Savannah experience is... well, my own, and my partner who was there at my side didn't see or feel anything. Don't go to a "haunted" place with intention of seeing a ghost, you'll probably just be disappointed or make yourself anxious for no reason.

Contains Foley House, the black shuck, and a raw record written the night of the Sorrel Weed house absolutely wrecking my ass:

Foley House:

We stayed in room 403, but I'm not aware of any historical significance other than it being one of the original rooms of the house.

I highly recommend this place to stay and the room felt outright "welcoming" in a strange way, as if I was always meant to be There, specifically, but that might be the special interest euphoria. I'd been aching to sleep in an old Victorian room again.

The first moment of displeasure was when I was having breakfast with my partner in one of the corner windows. We were pleasantly chatting when I suddenly went silent, thrown onto a freeze state with my blood running cold and my nerves shot. I saw nothing, but I could feel "someone" suddenly enter the room, simply observe us by standing in the middle of the rug in front of the bed, then turn and walk out. My blood warmed quickly after they left, my limbs shaking. I logically didn't see them as a threat- I've had this happen before- but my body reacted to the environment being very abruptly "Wrong" on a primal level all the same.

Another night- the night coming back from Sorrel- in that room I was jolted awake by a deafening blood curdling scream which certainly kept me awake for a long time. Every time I tried to sleep that night I'd have very disturbed visions that'd jolt me back awake. You can write this off as my intense experience influencing me as I do have a history of "exploding head syndrome" and sleep paralysis, though I haven't experienced it in a long time until that night and haven't experienced it again since. Thought I'd include it anyway.

On the street:

I see black dogs as a divine messenger and protector in my spirituality, and boy did I kept running into them in Savannah to the point that it felt on the nose. It was a sign that I'd achieved something, that I'm where I need to be, and that it was time for another huge (metaphorical) death in my life so that I can secure my future- and in the most hopeful but absolutely weary way possible, boy am I going through it right now haha. The third night of the Savannah trip was when I suddenly came to terms that I'm literally working myself to death and need to change how I view and care for myself before it's too late.

If anyone is looking for the huge antique Baskervilles Hound painting that I ran into, it's at Six Pence Pub.

Sorrel Weed

Following is what I wrote for myself the immediate night of getting back from Sorrel, so this is a very fresh, rattled, and stream of consciousness record. I normally don't really like posting something like this, but always feel something intuitive and fresh like this is the most genuine way to relay paranormal experiences. TL:DR: Saw weird thing in courtyard. Got sick a lot very suddenly. Met a very nice skull person. Got fucked up on spooky couch. Got even more fucked up from body reacting to the stress after leaving.

"I accidentally missed the normal historical architecture tour for the Sorrel Weed house and had to take a late night ghost-focused one. Wanted the normal tour but we leave tomorrow so its this or nothing. Didn't go into it expecting anything and was excited to take lots of reference photos for Widderwood, as usual.

Saw something in the garden and knew immediately things were going to be weird tonight. White flash, person height, within courtyard and in front of street entrance. Actually really funny in the moment because I Did Not Want That Thing To Have Just Happened but I'm so used to experiencing the woo-woo that I just mentally went "oh god dammit" defeated.

Felt fine, excited for architecture, then passed the threshold and... my flight response suddenly goes off. Hard. Right into the master of the house office and I get supremely bad vertigo. Got annoyed because I was trying to listen to the history of the place, but vertigo kept rising which made me wobble on my cane. I came here mainly to collect art reference but I knew then and there that I did Not want a single photo of this place on my phone. I don't know why, even- just in the moment I couldn't stand the idea of keeping photos of this place.

I kept getting sick and vertigo, but only in Very specific locations. Mostly stayed at the back and tried to hide my discomfort to not influence anyone in the tour group. Downstairs, servant's quarters, I could feel a busy "echo" in the catch-all work room where cooking and various chores would have been done- I'm not sure how to explain but it was like a vibration that unsettled me a bit? Just very weird.

Funny, I felt the safest in the near-black basement grain room, which saw civil war trauma surgery and acted as a morgue for a few years. An antique wheelchair was to the side of the gurney (special interest euphoria, hello). To the other side of the room, a female skull that was sourced from a denture manufacturer. She was beautiful- so, so beautiful that I kept coming back to look her in the face with a very comforted smile on my own. Absolutely radiant energy. In the same room to another corner, a couch that we are allowed to sit upon and may feel someone sit next to us. Well, I certainly needed a rest from standing, and I didn't feel anyone, but I sure did have such a strong, sudden vertigo that I made a surprised noise and slumped back for a few minutes close to fainting. The second I got some wind back I got off the couch and mentally went "haha, No". Wooziness is nothing new to me, but I felt trapped and heavy for a solid few minutes- never had that happen before, genuinely startling.

Our very kind tour guide could tell something was up with me, keeping an eye on my reactions. I was trying to not be too vocal about what I was experiencing, just manage my symptoms as normal, but it's obvious she knew I was Going Thru It. In private we discussed my connection to death, she showed us her Victorian mourning jewelry, and agreed the ossified woman in the doctor's case was beautiful. The tour guide told me the skull's name in life- Zarina- and though I'm doubtful of her original acquirement post-death and what she expected of her remains, it still felt sacred to be allowed to know her name and look upon her. Other people in the group kept making "eww creepy" comments toward her and I get it, I Do, but I wish I could have figured out what to say to gently suggest to see her as a person rather than a scary death item. I am glad I met Zarina. The other ghost tales- like the chair in the for some reason scary red lighted hall (why tho)- I did hover around but didn't experience anything.

Leaving the property, I felt a bit numb but my nausea and vertigo lifted over a few blocks. Our walk to our room was short, followed by... my body going into minor shock as soon as we got back to our room. I shook for at least an hour, I think its taken me most of the night just to get my body's responses to level.

I feel so energetically drained, different from my normal disability related fatigue, yet the entire time I was mentally calm. My body has felt this before, there is a difference. Chronic stress disorder and autism make me incredibly sensitive to the environment around me but it's been a minute since my body has reacted so... violently to atmosphere without obvious cause. The strongest since experiencing that fucked up abandoned house in Ohio over a decade ago. I didn't expect to taste such heavy air like that again, least of all when I was mostly hoping to take reference.

Sorrel Weed offers proper ghost investigations, which seemed like a fun thought to try in the future. I walked in excited for historical reference, but walked out somewhat harrowed instead. Now, I'm certain that I cannot entertain the idea of ghost hunting or else I will be at very real risk of a full medical episode... at least in that house."

[ultravioletqueen]

Hey...does anyone remember iole?

She was one of the wives of Heracles in Greek mythology, she was a beautiful princess daughter of King Eurytus of Oechalia, who had offered his daughter's hand in marriage, however he had rejected Heracles as his daughter's husband due to what had happened to Megara and his children, what did Heracles do? Simple, HE LOATED HER CITY, KILLED HER FAMILY AND TOOK IOLE AWAY BY FORCE, their love story was not an enjoyable one for Iole.

It doesn't help at all to see that in the artistic representations of iole she never looks happy and even looks a little scared, she was in a highly dangerous situation with a man who ripped her away from her family and took her as a trophy, and He did not settle with her and in that same period of time he began to court Deyanira😒

Now why am I talking about this character that almost no one remembers? Because I think it would have a lot of potential for Hades, specifically the second part where we meet Heracles personally.

We know that Heracles, being favored by the gods, can leave the underworld, and I imagine that at this moment there could be two paths for Iole:

1) she is alive and trying to rebuild her life: in mythology she left home with the eldest son of Heracles but I prefer to think that here she would stay single or with another man, this is the possibility that most favors Iole.

2) she is dead and with her family in the underworld: here comes the guilt that Heracles could feel upon seeing her again, she would be afraid of him and her family would have contempt for him, this is my favorite since it puts bad actions on the table of Heracles and shows the consequences it had on third parties.

I imagine that in both cases, as a sign of solidarity, Heracles would try to avoid running into Iole because 1) he recognizes the fear she must have of him and 2) he knows that he doesn't deserve to be near her after everything he put her through

Something else that I found interesting about Iole is that at no time did Deyanira try to get rid of Iole, she being the reason why Heracles stopped paying attention to her, knowing what jealous wives are like in Greek mythology, I was surprised not to find a story where Deyanira takes revenge on Iole or treats her badly.

My vision is that Deyanira is a girls girl and had no resentment towards Iole because she saw how sad she looked being with the murderer of her family, probably thanks to this she thought that if she made Heracles only love her she would leave Iole in peace or I would let her go at best.

The thing that make me believe this is the myth where iole makes heracles wear women clothes and she wears the clothes of the hero, heracles only wanted to flaunt his great deeds but deyanira told him to not keep talking and accept his place(i know that the most popular version is that the queen onfale did that but i like this one too bc iole in this version avenges her father's death)

What if we made iole and deyanira kiss?

(Español)

Oigan...¿alguien se acuerda de iole?

Ella fue una de las esposas de heracles en la mitología griega, ella era una princesa hermosa hija del rey eurytus de oechalia, quien había ofrecido la mano de su hija en matrimonio, sin embargo había rechazado a heracles como esposo de su hija debido a lo que había ocurrido con megara y sus hijos, ¿que hizo heracles? Simple, SAQUEO SU CIUDAD, MATO A SU FAMILIA Y SE LLEVO A IOLE POR LA FUERZA, su historia de amor no fue una disfrutable para iole.

No ayuda en nada ver que en las representaciones artísticas de iole ella nunca se le ve feliz e incluso se le ve algo asustada, ella estaba en una situación altamente peligrosa con un hombre que la arranco de su familia y la tomó como un trofeo, y no se comformo con ella y en ese mismo intervalo de tiempo empezó a cortejar a deyanira😒

Ahora ¿porque hablo de este personaje que casi nadie recuerda? Porque pienso que tendría mucho potencial para hades, en específico la segunda parte donde conocemos personalmente a heracles.

Sabemos que heracles al ser favorecido por los dioses puede dejar el inframundo, y me imagino que para este momento podría haber dos caminos para iole:

1)ella está viva y tratando de rehacer su vida:en la mitología ella de casa con el hijo mayor de heracles pero prefiero pensar que aquí se quedaría soltera o con otro hombre, esta es la posibilidad que más favorece a iole.

2)ella está muerta y con su familia en el inframundo: aquí entra la culpa que heracles podria sentir al volver a verla, ella le tendría miedo y su familia le tendría desprecio, esta es mi favorita ya que pone sobre la mesa las malas acciones de heracles y muestra las consecuencias que tuvo sobre terceros.

Me imagino que en ambos casos como muestra de solidaridad heracles trataria de evitar toparse con iole porque 1)reconoce el miedo que le debe tener y 2) sabe que no merece estar cerca de ella después de todo lo que le hizo pasar.

Algo más que me pareció interesante acerca de iole es que en ningún momento deyanira trato de deshacerse de iole siendo ella la razón por la que heracles le dejo de dar atención, conociendo como son las esposas celosas en la mitología griega me sorprendió no encontrar una historia donde deyanira toma venganza en iole o la trate mal.

Mi visión es que deyanira sea una girls girl y no tuviera resentimiento hacia iole porque veía lo triste que se veía al estar junto al asesino de su familia, probablemente gracias a esto pensaba que si hacía que heracles solo la amara a ella dejaría a iole en paz o la dejaría ir en el mejor de los casos.

Lo que me hace creer esto es el mito donde iole hace que heracles use ropa de mujer y ella usa la ropa del héroe, heracles solo quería alardear de sus grandes hazañas pero deyanira le dijo que no siguiera hablando y aceptara su lugar(lo sé, la versión más popular es que la reina onfale hizo eso pero esta también me gusta porque iole en esta versión venga la muerte de su padre)

¿Que tal si hacemos que ellas se besen?

Me rn at the thought of deyanira x iole/yo pensando en deyanira x iole

[canonically47]

hey, what total drama ships are you into, reboot and original?

right now i’m really into rajbow, ripaxel, and mkulia from reboot.

those same three for the reboot for me! i also like some other ships but i have conflicting headcanons. i hc nichelle, damien, wayne, emma and scary girl as aroace, but i like certain ships with them, like damichelle, emmayne, scarmien etc. i think the fandom does a really good job with pairs lol

from the original seasons, aleheather is probably my top one ship, and nowen a very close second. aleheather make me go crazy /pos. i also like courtheather, evizzy, kasadie, justzeke, trustin, harzeke, lesharold, h-bomb and many others. and also, a specific thing about harold is, i usually hc him as bisexual transmasc in gay ships, but in 'straight' ships, i hc him as a transfem lesbian. so it's either yaoi or yuri for the guy which love that for him.

there's definitely more pairs... season one duncney and gwent are awesome but not beyond those seasons. funnily enough i can't see the vision for popular ships like alenoah or noco but i like some fanart and fic i see of them, a really good noco-centric fic was one based on the IOTS AU, "death cast" on ao3 by nocopops, highly recommend checking it out if you're a fan.

i also like some of the other canon pairs, lyler is my religion, also gidgette is adorable. recently started shipping aletyler unironically and i feel amazing, they are the cutest. and tbh? aleowen and justowen are cute as hell too. and other rarepairs, courtgette is sooo cute you guys i love them so much, also bridj and djeoff... bridjeoff polycule is real to me...

there's probably so many others. TDI has so many shippable characters

[voxofthevoid]

for the ship ask game, i saw you say you ship Nobara/Maki and Maki/Mai so i am curious now what you like about them (i love them too 😌). and Higuruma/Yuuji

(something i will never get tired of saying: love your goyuu fics! :D also i am tempted to finally watch Hannibal just so i could read your fics)

*chokes* THOSE FICS ARE TEN YEARS OLD, PLEASE, YOU WON'T RECOGNIZE THE WRITING. I sure don't. Anything I wrote pre-2018 makes me skitter away in fear.

Ahem. The ships. Good choices!

Nobara/Maki

Ship It

What made you ship it?

I was pretty 👀 after that one scene where Nobara leans on Maki's shoulder and says she respects her. Maki's reaction, while mild, was pretty cute, and it's also the most...sweet we see Nobara act with anyone. It was then followed by Nobara recruiting Yuuji to basically support Maki during the GW event, and I was sold at that point. That one manga cover where Maki and Nobara look like they're on a date certainly helped.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

They're both sharp-edged people who get a little soft for each other, and I like that. I also think their personalities would intersect and interact in fun ways—not a lot of outright complications, a bit of reserved communication that would probably get talked out, etc. And this may sound odd, but I like how the way they get along and are less prickly with each other doesn't come across as "they're pals because they're gals" but as people softening due to romantic interest. Won't lie, it's once again too tame to really light my brain up, but we've got Mai/Maki for that.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Hmm, nope, don't think so.

Maki/Mai

Ship It

What made you ship it?

I'm a simple man: throw me a sibling relationship with fucked-up vibes, and I'll happily ship it. But honesty, this writes itself. Their interactions during the GW event alone are pretty compelling, especially the clash between Mai's abandonment issues and Maki's more practical approach. Then we get the utter gem that's the Perfect Preparation arc, and holy shit.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

I love me some tragedy. The part where Maki tells Naoya that no, she doesn't have a heart because "she took it with her" lives rent-free in my head. Post-Mai Maki, from the grief-fuelled massacre of her clan to the visions she has of Mai in relation to the sword she became, makes me fucking feral.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

I think they should make each other worse.

Higuruma/Yuuji

Ship It

What made you ship it?

To be honest, I think my initial draw to this was that it reminded me a little of nanaita. And I've always approached this ship as Higuruma reminding Yuuji of Nanami somewhat, so you can imagine how satisfying it was to see canon itself draw a parallel, albeit with their deaths. But even disregarding the nanaita influence, I'm pretty damn fond of this ship. I absolutely love every single one of their interactions, especially the last fight and the flashback where we see Yuuji talking alone to Higuruma.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

This is highly specific, but the way Higuruma can't look Yuuji in the eye to the point he threw/lost their fight because of it and then fucking dies while making serene eye contact with Yuuji is going to haunt me for as long as I'm in this fandom. Can you tell I love tragic shit?

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

Just my usual "let Yuuji fuck that grown man" agenda.

And thank you! You're a gem, as always ❤

Ask can be found game here.

[chloe-caulfield94]

Do you think they will have another LIS with Max and Chloe? If they do, I hope they continue with the "Save Bae" ending. Do you have any ideas for an "After The Storm" game? Thanks for all the likes on my Pricefieldizcanon page btw!

I don't think we will get another Life is Strange with Max and Chloe as main characters. But I do think that they will continue the trend started in S2 and Wavelenghts, where the player is asked at the very beginning what they chose in S1 and depending on your answer there will be cameos/mentions of Max and Chloe.

I think it's likely that non-game LiS content (comic books, novels) will continue to follow the "save Chloe" ending, no matter if it's content specifically about them (like the comics) or about other characters (Steph's Story, which mentions them at one point).

It's no wonder that they chose to follow the "save Chloe" ending in the non-game content so far. It simply creates much better opportunities for storytelling than the aftermath of Chloe's murder.

Such opportunitiues include: Max once again finding herself in a situation where she has to use her powers or to let someone die (this was already explored in the LiS comics, with Max's rescue of Tristan). Chloe finally realizing that she does in fact deserve to live, deserves love and deserves a fresh start (this was also explored in the comics). Chloe being reconciled with David and David finally becoming the father figure he promised Chloe to become in BtS (this was briefly touched upon in S2, but it deserves a story of its own). Steph, Mikey and other survivors of the Storm grieving their loved ones (this was explored in Wavelengths and Steph's Story). We could even imagine a confrontation between Max and Steph, if Steph were to ever find out about the events of Storm week (I highly recommend great short fanfic by AO3 user Shisumo about Max telling Steph why she has no right to judge her for choosing Chloe: https://archiveofourown.org/works/37099903 . I also wrote a short fanfic which touches upon a Max/Steph meeting, but I imagined it in a less confrontational manner: https://archiveofourown.org/works/50505817 ).

None of those storytelling opportunites exist after Chloe is murdered. Bay Max would never use her power again, not even to save someone's life. Bay Max would just watch Tristan being murdered, just like she did with Chloe. Chloe would never receive the love and care she so desperately needed, let alone accept that she deserved it. Nobody would be reconciled. Steph and Mikey would go about their lives, not aware that Bay Max is carrying on her shoulders the grief and sorrow of an entire town, like a modern day sin-eater.

Death is final. It solves all problems, but in the least satisfying way possible. It cuts all loose threads short. It's a sudden stop to any and all stories. I don't see an opportunity for any meaningful stories following Chloe's murder. Unless it would be some morbid story about Bay Max stumbling through life, crushed with remorse. Regretting every day that she took her love and friendship back, erased it so that it never happened. That she nipped something beautiful in the bud. Hating herself and finally learning to hate Chloe for making her feel that way.

I am very fond of the LiS comics. So even if we never get another story with Max and Chloe as main characters, I am content with the comics as the "canon" conclusion to their story.

As for my personal idea for a post-Storm game: I would love to see the "other Max/nightmare Max" return as an antagonist. Some time after the Storm, Max would start having visions, similar to her nightmare in E5, where her evil twin would try to once again drive a wedge between Max and Chloe by spewing lies and hate. Max would then be sucked into multiple alternate timelines (like in the first issue of the comics). But they would all be very dark timelines, where "other Max" chose wrong, chose to hurt people. Max would have to work to undo the wrong choices made by her evil twin. Of course, in the end Max would right all the wrongs, rebuke her evil twin and find a way back to her own timeline.

The character of "other Max" could be played in two ways - either as a manifestation of Max's internal struggle or as an entirely separate person - a version of Max who instead of love, friendship, courage and trust chose fear, doubt, resentment and guilt.

I love the confrontation between our Max and "other Max" in E5. It represents a struggle with a dark part of her own mind. And if she tears the butterfly photograph, Max achieves a victory over her own fears and doubts, which is the greatest victory one could possibly achieve.

So I would love to see that struggle of Max against her inner demon (or a version of herself shaped by wrong choices) turned into an entire game.

[jessicas-pi]

the Number Of Pretty Specific Ideas And Plot Points That The Ahsoka Show Used (Or That Fans Of The Show Have Theorized It Would Use) That I Actually Came Up With First For My Fic counter is currently sitting at SEVEN.

So anyway, not to self promo on main, but if you're enjoying the ahsoka show but wish it had more hijinks, shenanigans, force weirdness, time travel, temporary character deaths, eventual happy endings, hugs, visions, nightmares, mythosaurs, emotional pain, and Quinlan Vos, I highly recommend checking out my Time Heals 'verse.

[banashee]

I got tagged by @lucianinsanity - thanks, friend! 🖤

Question Tag Game Thingy

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Current book I'm reading: Shadows At The Door Anthology Re-read. It's really good, highly, recommend!

Last song I listened to: In My Side (Modern Horror Version) by Vision Video

Currently watching: I'm not actually in the middle of anything right now, surprisingly enough.

Current fic I'm reading: re-reading a bunch of my old fics in the hopes to find the spoons to start writing again.

Next on my Watch List: Ahahahaha so many things. Our Flag Means Death Season 2 and The Fall of the House of Usher are the first two (and most "urgent") that come to my mind

Current obsession:

Do you want that in alphabetical order or sorted by topic...?

Right now it's mostly music by beloved artists who I have, or wanna see live. Or wanna see live again. Like Vision Video, Ghost, Lebanon Hanover....

Oh and also art. There's specific things I wanna do and Idon't have the time or spoons right now 😭

-

Tagging you Folks, if you want to do this and everyone who wants to do this but wasn't tagged. No pressure on anyone!

@pocketsizedquasar @lucky-numberme @undefeatednils @famosoentrescalles @lilolilyr @isabhell-becker

[oathbreakerapologist]

i think the way u decided to have gortash drive a wedge between orin and your durge (as opposed to the other way around) quite interesting. what insecurities/hangups do you think he preyed upon to make that happen? what changes did ghost notice in her, if any, and how did he respond? did he suspect gortash had anything to do with this?

ah this is such a fun question!! answer below the cut because this is a long one lol

Orin was brought up in an environment that encouraged treachery with deadly stakes; arguably her most significant formative experience was being attacked by, and then slaughtering, her own mother as a young child, and I can't imagine that was the only time she encountered and overcame a similar threat. As a result, she was primed to expect betrayal—even anticipate it—and react aggressively. After all, she earned Sarevok's favor by doing exactly that. Orin survived to adulthood specifically because she eliminated potential threats before they could eliminate her.

For that reason, then, she was ideally positioned to be turned into a usurper. She was already capable of murdering even those to whom she was closest. But seeing everyone around you as either a future victim or a possible threat leaves very little room for the sort of social bonds that humans, as social beings, tend to need.

One could say Niro was the only person Orin trusted, but really their relationship was built on a stranger sort of dependence than that: they thought of each other as extensions of a single being, the lone two tokens of one type, parts of a whole that would melt back together once there was nothing left but blood, gore, and death. Nobody else thought like her, felt like her, acted like her—he was transparent, comprehensible, predictable to her in a way other people weren't, in a way he wasn't to anyone else. She trusted him because she trusted herself.

So what Gortash had to do was force her to see differences between herself and Niro. He leaned into their differing statuses, involving Niro and leaving Orin behind whenever he got the opportunity. He concocted schemes to draw Niro away from the Temple as often as possible, and added forged letters into the mix of the barrage of correspondence Niro sent back to Orin each time he was away. The letters were easy to forge, too; he didn't even need to match handwriting, as Niro—who is blind and at this point could neither read nor write—dictated all his letters to a scribe. Those letters picked at things Gortash knew Niro loved about Orin, particularly her artistic flair (in my canon the letter you can find from the Dark Urge to Orin criticizing the spectacle of her killing style exists courtesy of Gortash). The letters didn't even need to match up with what Niro would undoubtedly say to Orin in other letters; all Gortash needed to do was introduce inconsistency, confusion, unpredictability.

Soon after Gortash began targeting Orin in this way, Niro noticed her seeking reassurance from him in odd ways, as if she'd suddenly become uncertain again about things like her artistry, her place in the Temple, her place in Bhaal's visions of a slaughtered world. But his responses never seemed to improve the situation; it was as if everything he added to the mix only perturbed her further. Then she pulled away from him, which he found deeply upsetting.

He did indeed consider the possibility that Gortash had engineered this situation, but because of his particularly low opinion of Gortash made Gortash a bit of a blind spot to him. As far as he was concerned, Gortash was useful because of his ability to cultivate alliances and develop technology of war, and just about all else the man did was, at best, pathetic. Niro did not think highly enough of Gortash to believe him capable of meddling in his relationship with Orin. Without a clear reason for their newfound strife, he spiraled, disappearing for long stretches of time to go on murderous rampages through the loosely-settled areas around Baldur's Gate in an attempt to exorcise his fear and grief. Of course, his absences only made the situation worse. There was a time that, when Orin didn't know where he was, she didn't believe him to be off plotting her downfall, but that time was long gone.

Ultimately, Orin betrayed Niro because Gortash, through a lens of falsehood and exaggeration, had forced her to confront something true: Niro was not her. He was someone else, he was someone else in a position of power, he was someone else in a position of power with the knowledge and physical prowess make him capable of doing her harm, and therefore he was a potential threat. And Orin had survived to adulthood specifically because she eliminated potential threats before they could eliminate her.