#my dad fuckin loves these i just wish we had more to like put In there because like only cheese gets kind of excessive

[mxbitters]

i thiiiink im gonna make an omelet :))

[thebearer]

the milestones menu: nonna berzatto's homemade pasta

prompt: yours and carmen's first "i love you".

contains: fluff, general fluff. some mentions to dead relatives, carmen's self doubt, but very minimal bc it's very fluffy :)

2 cups of flour- Semolina. 

4 Large Eggs 

Pinch of Salt

Put flour into a mound. Make a center, and add the eggs to the middle. Whisk slowly with a fork, gradually working it in little at a time until nice and thick. Knead the mixture for about ten minutes. Let it rest in the fridge for thirty minutes. Put it in a ball, and roll it out very thin. 

“Can’t believe you never had homemade pasta.” Carmen shook his head, blue eyes peeking out from under the mess of curls. 

“Nope.” You shook your head, grinning over the crystal wine glass, sipping your riesling slowly. “Strictly a boxed pasta girl.” 

“Fuckin’ criminal.” Carmen grinned, a playful, lopsided smirk that had you blushing.

The counter was covered in flour, stopping just where you rested, propped up on the granite while Carmen worked. Your eyes trained on his hands, hands that stirred the eggs into the flour, kneaded the dough until your thighs were clenching. 

“My Nonna is rollin’ in her grave right now, you know that?” Carmen pulled you from your gaze, rolling out the dough. 

“Noooo, don't say that.” You laughed, shaking your head. “You’re making me feel bad, Carmen. I swear I thought Olive Garden made fresh pasta.” 

Carmen laughed, a little shy but louder now- more himself. He’d blossomed with you lately, unveiling new parts of himself every single day. “‘M just kiddin’, baby.” Carmen hummed, eyes cutting to you a little skeptical. “Sorry, I-I didn’t mean to sound like an asshole. That sounded douchey, right?” 

You smiled, setting your glass behind you. “No, I was just messin’ with you, bear.” The nickname- his nickname. Hearing it more and more roll from your tongue, each time his heart skipped harder than the last. 

“Is this her recipe?” You asked, picking up the faded recipe card, looped cursive on the aged paper. “Your Nonna’s?” 

“Yeah,” Carmen nodded. “I, uh, so when I left to go to culinary school, right? She was sick, and… and I think she, like, knew that when I went to New York that would be the last time she saw me.” Carmen’s face dropped, slow and sad, it made your own heart sink. 

“So she-she gave me all these recipe books and-and cards that were hers. We used to cook together a lot. She taught me how to cook, y’know? My mom and dad were always at the restaurant and didn’t want to cook when they got home. They didn’t want me in the restaurant either so I spent a lot of time with her.” Carmen muttered. You could see the memories playing behind his eyes. 

You liked to picture that version of Carmen, a little boy with wild curls, helping his Nonna cook. Happy memories. 

“That’s sweet.” You smiled, leaning against the cabinets. “She did a really good job. You know she’s so insanely proud of you.” 

Carmen snorted, shaking his head lightly. “Yes, she is. Everyone’s proud of you, Carmen… I’m proud of you.” You hesitate, eyes scanning his features. It was true, of course, but handling Carmen sometimes was like handling a frightened animal. You were never sure what would make him scatter away in fear. 

Carmen swallowed thickly, cheeks flushed red, lips in a tight line. “T-Thanks.” Carmen muttered, wiping his hands on his apron, tossing the flour back into his clammy hands. 

“She, uh, she woulda loved you, y’know.” Carmen’s eyes met yours, intense and piercing. “I wish you coulda met her.” 

“Yeah, me too.” You nod. “I would’ve loved to hear all the baby Carmen cooking stories. I bet she had some good ones.” You smiled, bright and wide- perfect. It made Carmen’s brain numb. 

“Yeah, she would.” Carmen nodded, hands stilling, still buried in the dough. 

He felt it in his bones, his heart, consuming his thoughts. The overwhelming need he’d felt for weeks, since the first time you kissed him really, that he’d been fighting- too scared to say. What he felt every time he looked at you, when he thought about you. 

“Um, I-I wanna say something, and-and I don’t know if I should even fuckin’ say this or-or if it’s… fuck, if you-you feel the same or I just, I don’t wanna fuck this up because this is like the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and-and I’m workin’ on not ruinin’ good shit in my life and bein’ ok with it like-like my therapist says ya know, but-” Carmen rambled, words spilling out in fast, overwhelming bouts that took you by surprise. 

Carmen flustered, reaching a dough covered hand to his face, the sticky batter catching on his brows and hair. He flushed deeply, hands shaking in embarrassment, cursing under his breath. “F-Fuck, I-I’m sorry. I-I, nevermind, it’s not… I don’t know why-why I would-” His hands trembled, body shaking with anger and embarrassment. Way to fuckin’ go, Berzatto, you fuckin’ ruin it. That’s all you ever do, Carmen thought bitterly, wiping his hands off on the cloth. 

“Carm,” You said softly, your voice a beacon in the raging sea of his mind, pulling him out of his own harsh thoughts. 

Carmen turned, a fury flush of pure embarrassment that burnt all down his cheeks to his chest. Eyes soft and wary, hesitant like he was doomed, destined for the worse. 

You slide off the counter easily, grabbing the spare towel, bringing it to his eyebrows, wiping the dough off gently. The softness of your touch soothed Carmen, lulling his hammering heart- he didn’t see your own shaking hands, filled with your own adrenaline nerves. 

You stood in front of him, eyes on the other, careful and watching- unsure. “I-I love you, too.” Your breath hitched, squeezing the words out in a nervous tumble. Carmen didn’t move, body going rigid, heart stopping entirely. The ringing was back in his ears, clouding his brain so loudly he was sure he heard you wrong. 

“I’ve wanted to say it for a while, too, but didn’t…” You shook your head, heat in your own cheeks, eyes casting down to his dough covered hand. “I didn’t know if-if you felt that or if- I don’t know, I didn’t want to seem crazy or obsessive if it was too soon, and-and scare you.” 

“No,” Carmen croaked, tongue thick in his own mouth. “No, I-I mean- fuck,” Carmen shook his head, looking to the wall. He needed a second, words jumbled in his mouth, heart racing, so high off the adrenaline he felt like he could combust at any moment. 

“I-I was gonna say that too.” Carmen nodded, the quirk in your lips making his heart lurch. “That I love you. I was- yeah, I love you. I-I have for a while.” 

“Really?” You whispered, voice tiny and excited, like it was a secret just for the two of you. Maybe it was. 

“Yeah, fuck yeah.” Carmen let out a breathy, shaky laugh. “I love you, and-and I just love you so much it makes my brain hurt sometimes.” 

“Me too.” You grin, a hand pressing to his cheek. “I love you.” The phrase you’d repressed for so long, deprived yourself of saying now spilled out of you like a mantra- like that was all you could say now. 

Carmen grinned, brain bubbly and light. He let you pull him into a kiss, head tilting down, lips molding over yours so they fit perfectly. 

Later over plates of Bologonese, you grinned across the table from Carmen. “If I didn’t tell you I loved you before, I definitely would now.” You moaned, pointing at the plate. “I really was missing out.” 

Carmen beamed under your praise, gooey and love drunk off your words- off you. He knew Viola Berzatto, wherever she was, was boasting with pride. 

And he knew his Nonna would have loved you too. 

[cyncerity]

woah 2 stories in a week?? crazy

anyway this is for the superhero au again cause i’m very attached to it (please send asks there’s so much lore in this thing)

anyway this story doesn’t outright contain g/t, it’s just a short thing to explain character motivations, relationships, dynamics, and the inciting incident for a few of our main characters >:)

anyway, tw: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH

“Hey man. I, uh, know it’s been a while, but I just wanted to check in.” Tommy wrung the fabric in his hands. “I know Dad doesn’t stop by much anymore. He can’t handle it, he says. I think he’s lost hope.”

Tommy hated to admit that he’d been losing hope too.

“I know you wanted me out of this. To keep me safe. Dad always thought I was just useless, too ‘childish,’ but you, you believed in me, right? I’m a vigilante now, i’ve made some new friends too!” Tommy sighed, continuing after a few moments of silence. “Dad…lost the court case I was telling you about.” He squeezed the fabric tighter. “No shock to you, I’m sure, you know how he is. He…he didn’t show up. That told the judge all he needed to know about ‘neglectful parenting.’ Mom knows, too. She couldn’t do much to fight it since she moved out, though. She’s still my legal parent and all, she’s just splitting custody with Techno now. I took her last name, just like you. She did want me to tell you she wishes she could make it as often as she used to, but asked me to bring these since she couldn’t be here in person.” Tommy laid a bouquet of black roses on the bedside table, on top of a pile of others ranging from old to decaying. He’d have to clean those up eventually. He couldn’t bring himself to right now. “She always said these reminded her of you.”

“Techno’s good to me.” Tommy continued. “You know his foster kid, Ranboo? I’m living with him now, too. He’s ok. Bit fidgety, nervous. Real awkward guy, so him and Techno get on perfectly. He’s not quite my brother yet, but…honestly, i think he could get there. Could never replace you, though.” Tommy laughed wetly, wiping unshed tears from his eyes. “You always knew how Tech felt about this stuff. Fuckin’ english major forced to be a supervillain. He’s much happier since he quit. Ranboo took his place in the Syndicate, now he runs a little library-cafe-dojo thing down in the colder parts of the Smp. I know he loves it, but i’ve had to adjust to the snow since i moved in.”

A tear ran down Tommy’s cheek, and he couldn’t pry his hands out of the beanie he held to bother to wipe it away.

“We…we miss you, man. Mom and Phil have been a wreck without you, Techno’s been left to pick up their pieces. I know you always joked that he might as well be part of the family, i don’t think you ever guessed how true that’d become. I- I can’t put into words how much this has taken from me. How much you being gone has taken from me. Yet i know if you’re still there, that you’re fighting to be here again. I’m not giving up on you. I can’t. You never gave up on me. You’re stronger than this.”

Tommy pulled the burgundy beanie over his head, the last thing his big brother had given him before his mission. Before the accident.

Wilbur lay unresponsive in the hospital bed like he had for over a year now.

Tommy walked over. He laid his forehead on his brothers, feeling tears slip off his face and down the other’s cheek.

“I’ll be waiting for you, bitch. However long it takes. I promise.”

Tommy turned to leave, past the blinking lights and the beeping machines keeping the man’s body alive when his brain was anything but. Past the dead flowers and dozens of get well soon cards and a few happy birthday ones. He turned the light off, knowing his brother preferred the dark. He’d be here again next week or sooner to turn it off once more when a nurse inevitably turned it back on.

Tommy closed the door behind him, leaving the body of his brother alone once more.

[morroodle]

Tumblr fuckin ate this post the first time so let's try it again

Finally had time to watch the new season! Opinions and spoilers under the cut

Ok so overall I liked the season. Nothing really special or that stood out to me but it's still a very enjoyable experience, and I'm very excited for part 2. Now for some more specific thoughts in a non specific order

Lloyd being super tired at the beginning is so funny. He's such an eepy little man please let him sleep (preferably not on the floor)

Fugidove in a tree

Big Riyu! He's such a cutie pie <3 he's got big ol toe beans!

I wanted to punch Egalt. I really wanted to punch Egalt. I'm sorry but his attitude is so infuriating I do not like it. I do however love how Wyldfyre annoys him into liking her. 10/10 exactly how I made friends.

Don't care much for the other teacher dragon and I already forgot her name but I hate how small her wings are. Several of the new dragons have problems like this but hers are extra bad. You cannot convince me she can fly with those

Overall I don't know how I feel about the new dragon lore. These random ass not even source dragons just being able to talk is so weird, and it's weird that dragons can do spinjitzu. The more we get into DR the more it feels like they're just ignoring all the previous dragon lore and doing their own thing (ok I know they are but consistency would have been nice)

Geo, Cole and the kids are so cute <3 the dads and their childeren <3 this silly little found family (heheh pun) means so much to me. Absolutely love seeing more of Bonzle and her character, she's very fun

There should have been more Euphrasia content

The sorceress! I forgot her name sorry but I love her. She's so silly and perfect and such a good supportive mom to her magic skeleton trans daughter. Wonderful character fuck Janet

The administration is wonderful and I hope they continue to be a minor nuisance that can be thwarted by their own rules

When Kai, Wyldfyre and Sora put on the wolf masks I got so nervous/excited and I was honestly pretty dissapointed it didn't go anywhere interesting

Is it just me or do the forbidden five have Kung-fu Panda vibes

Really don't care for the villain situation or the overarching plot. Not to say i don't like it but it's kinda just there to me. Cinder is silly but I don't care about him nearly as much as everyone else. Like I said, I just don't care about it.

Jordana's probably fine don't worry about it

And finally:

PUPPY COLE PUPPY COLE PUPPY COLE PUPPY COLE!!! 5,000,000/10 BEST PART OF THE ENTIRE SEASON. I only wish we got to see more of him because oh my god he is so cute and perfect.

[calzone-d]

"breaking down mid-hug because they just needed this so much" with Jason please!!!

oh really?

love bringing up the angst and scandals. who cares if some of this isn’t 100% accurate let me be delusional.

read more here!

tw: olivia, cheating, mentions of failed marriage, mentions of divorce

—

you’d heard it from jason before you’d seen the pictures. olivia had chunked their marriage away for harry styles. she’d spent plenty of time with him on her movie set, and while you knew she was kind of a spoiled brat with jason, you never thought she’d actually cheat.

by the time he’d arrived at your house with the kids, you already had your spare room set up. the kids looked happy as ever, completely oblivious to the situation.

jason, on the other hand, didn’t look too well. his phone kept a buzzing and ringing from all the calls and texts from her. it wasn’t easy to hide the disgust in his voice when he took her call in the next room.

you took the kids grocery shopping to give him space to cool down, and they were over the moon for a sleepover at your place.

jason seemed a lot more calm once you’d all returned. the kids wanted to spend the evening watching tv on your back patio, so you let them have fun while you tried your best to comfort jason.

“i just…really? i mean, fuck! we had a fucking family. what did i do that was so fucking wrong?”

“jase, you didn’t do a thing and you know that.”

“i knew things were getting rocky, but i didn’t think it was because she was fucking some kid!”

he rubbed his hands over his face and took in a shuddery breath. when his hands stayed on his face for a moment, you stepped towards where he was sitting on one of your barstools. you slid an arm around his shoulders and one on the back of his neck, holding him to you.

the way he squeezed you made it seem like he hadn’t been held in forever.

“s’feels so good..”, he relaxed in your arms.

after a few seconds you felt him began to shake, and heard him sniffling. his tears soaked the shoulder of your t-shirt and it was warm against your skin.

“should’ve left her years ago.. just tried stayin’ and acting like things were good so otis would be happy growin’ up, you know?”

you nodded and rested your cheek on the top of his head while your fingers stroked at his back through his shirt.

“he was, hun. still is.. you’re the best dad to those kids, don’t let her mistakes make you doubt that..”

his arms had found their way around your waist and he held you tightly to him. “that’s the thing, she doesn’t think it was a mistake! she thinks that it was totally justifiable! but i can’t even take a 10 minute phone call from you, o-or bring the kids over without being called a cheater!”

you just held him tight while he let it all out. this had clearly been pent up for a while.

“and as soon as I got the balls to leave, she ditches the birth control and fuckin’ gets pregnant with daisy. i didn’t even know she’d quit! which, i’m not saying i wish she wouldn’t, that’s my baby girl. it just felt so convenient for her.. she knew i’d reached my limit with her. all she ever wanted was a girl. gives otis the cold shoulder half the time just to spoil dais.. i wouldn’t change a thing but i wish she just had better fuckin’ morals, or.. or something.”

you sighed against his head. “there’s not too much you can do about that, other than just keep being the best dad like you have been.. when they get older they’ll realize how much time and care you put into them. deservedly so… they’re great fuckin’ kids, jase.”

he let out a huff that somewhat sounded like a chuckle.

“i just don’t know what the fuck to do now..”

“look, you guys can all stay here tonight. for as long as you need, you know that.”

he nodded against you.

no other words were spoken as your hand moved from the back of his neck up into his hair. he relaxed even more at the feeling of you twisting his graying locks through your fingers. after a few seconds you softly pressed a kiss to his temple, and that’s when the dam broke.

he let out a soft whimper into the fabric of your shirt and squeezed your waist when you muttered, “oh, hun..” and held him closer.

jason began crying as you held him and shushed him.

“did- did i say something? i didn’t mean to-“

“no! no.. just.. feels good havin’ you close again. s’been too long.. jus’ needed this.”

you couldn’t find the words to tell him you felt the same, but when he pressed a soft kiss to your shoulder that was now damp from his tears, you knew that he knew.

thanks for reading!

[reds-skull]

Hi I’m the work anon from earlier

Wow your revenant fic was amazing! I’m so glad I got to read it from start to finish and watch as your story grew and took shape

I adored Soap and Gaz’s friendship but I also adored how Ghost trusted and was friends with him too especially when he asked him for advice! 😭 (there’s so little of their friendship the fandom and it sucks ) Price was best dad and deserves all the hugs (and cigars for dealing with his sons squad every day) Rudy and Alejandro (and the vaqueros) were adorable and had the 141 backs from the start, they were ready to throw down! Grave’s got what he deserved I hated him in this fic so much (great job) he was such a smug smarmy bastard until the end. Farah and Alex were so sweet they were like the favourite cousins that got roped into the family drama (I still want Fahra to BITE shepherd you know as a treat!) Laswell knows things and is scary she will happily help people reach the find out portion of their fucking around.

The reapers were so cool!!!! Especially with how they combined I was not expecting that, was legit shooketh (I now imagine limbo as a pitch black ocean full of burning stars (I also have a couple questions regarding it I would like to asked later please?)) Soap’s reaper was warm and kind Ghost’s was cold and clinical together they’re so much more?!?! Like it’s poetic there the best version of themselves together (like ghoap)

Speaking of ghoap they’re so in love it’s sickening all I could imagine during the vows was Price “listening in” and then getting Laswell to hand the boys a bloody wedding certificate so sweet 😭

Thank you for putting in the time and effort to create something so beautiful for so many people have a lovely day or night you deserve a break after all of that hard work!

And with all my admiration fuck you for making me cry (again)

Hello work anon! Hope it went easy haha

I feel like there's a few versions of Ghost headcannons floating out there, one is basically "the man believes he's broken beyond repair, he doesn't think he's human, all he does is focus on work" and the other is "yeah he went through really fucked up shit, but he holds himself together pretty well, and while it's hard for him to find someone he trusts, the people close to him are priceless."

I like both versions, but this time I went for the latter. I love love love Ghost and Gaz as friends (mw4 please give me them interacting), and you can see that in my comics as well lol.

I made Graves such a little bitch that everyone hates from the start lmao.

I didn't plan for Rudy and Ghost to interact that much if I'm honest, but because Soap wasn't the POV and I wanted to have the Vaqueros more prominently in the story (it does take place mostly in Las Almas after all), Rudy's initial reaction to Ghost's mask was the perfect opening for a deeper friendship.

Farah and Alex weren't too active, if I make a sequel, I think I'll make it focused on the situation in Urzikstan. Farah deserves to take her own revenge and get her happy ending...

I love your description of Limbo, especially because I mentioned in the fic that Ghost loves seeing the stars, because it's the first thing he saw after he was Reaped (and now Soap created stars for him in the void).

I'd love to hear your questions!

Ghost and Soap, like someone else commented, are practically married on all levels beside legal lmao. I never planned for them to be so fuckin' whipped for each other tbh, like the vows at the start were not planned at all. I just looked up Celtic wedding vows, and it was literally so perfect for them ("I give ye my Body, that we Two might be One./I give ye my Spirit, ’til our Life shall be Done."? Couldn't fit more to their story), I just had to add it.

Thank you for reading and commenting! I wish this break was voluntary, but my semester is ending in 3 weeks and I have many projects to finish, so I have to prioritize that for a while T_T

[carolmunson]

⭐️ i need a directors cut for i wish i had a river that story broke me in half put me back together and healed me

Director’s Cut Ask Game This is an excerpt from Wish I Had A River:

“Maybe I didn’t want one,” he bites, exhaustion turning into unbridled frustration, “God, you think everyone likes this shit? All this holly jolly crap?” You shake your head no, biting your lip to keep from crying but the tears well up anyway. “You know you’re just – you’re so caught up in the fuckin’ magic of it all cause you don’t know any different. Was your daddy ever callin’ you from jail on Christmas morning? You ever wake up to nothing and wonder why Santa kept missing your uncle’s fuckin’ trailer?” he kept ranting, the tinsel on the tree shook with every stomp of his black boots. You shook your head no again. “You have no fuckin’ clue! Not everyone wants to be reminded of all the shit they never had,” his nostril flared while he spoke, voice raising with every word that came out, “You think you’re doing me a fuckin’ favor?! Buying me shit, tryn'a get me to do these stupid arts and crafts? I’m not one of your students, Ms. First Grade – stop treating me like one.”

Director's Cut: Below The Cut

I wrote this fic in less than a day. It poured out of me like water. I think it was also one of my first fics that was written from Eddie's perspective. Maybe I'm lying. Maybe not. But I think it is. I really wanted there to be so much build to him finally snapping, very similarly to Wish I Had A River Part II where there's no where for him to go but blowing up. Once the floodgates opened he just couldn't stop. And I personally love Christmas, so I had to really put myself in the shoes of someone who doesn't. A true Grinch! And how it would feel to be around someone who still finds the holidays magical when they never had been to you. I also know the trials and tribulations of working retail during the holidays so writing that kind of stress was easy -- even more easy in the second part. But here, while he's yelling, I wanted him to also finally speak out loud why he hates the holiday. He hates that his dad sometimes called from jail, that his mom is dead and can't do christmas with him like when he was a kid, that Wayne could only ever afford one or two things and they were always from a discount shop. And then he'd have to go to school after break and hear all about everyone else's presents from Santa and wonder why Santa wasn't ever coming to his house. He'd been working so hard only to be reminded of the loneliness he felt as a kid. Like, 'oh shit, my girlfriend is just like those kids at school'. But of course, we realize that she's not and he kind of comes to his senses. Very much a: 'maybe Christmas doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas -- perhaps -- means a little bit more.'

[soulsfractured]

23 for Yazoo

16 for Tseng

12 for Kuja

3, 4 for All Listed Muses, not just the three picked above

Random Character Asks

THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A CHANCE TO TALK ABOUT ALL MY BABIES. I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH. I really need to write more with everyone at some point, once I get back into the swing of writing again.

It's a bit long so everyones answers are under the cut!

Cyril

3 - Wears glasses because he can't wear contacts they bug his eyes too much. Still wishes he could though because he'd look more like Genesis that way.

4 - "If it could help my dad come back faster? I'm willing to give it a shot. So long as no one gets hurt from it, because then I won't do it."

YOU WANNA SEE ME CRY. Cyril put all his focus into biological sciences bc he wants to help Genesis in every way possible. He just wants to live a quiet life with his dad please let him have this--

Kuja

3 - Absolutely wears a packer, and had his codpiece custom made to fit it. Has thrown it at someone before, will throw it again.

4 - "Peace is but a shadow of death, desperate to forget its painful past... Though we hope for promising years. After shedding a thousand tears, yesterday's sorrow constantly nears. And while the moon still shines blue, by dawn, it will turn to scarlet hue."

Its in there, it's one of my favourites coming from someone who doesn't think he can die. Really makes me wonder if he had suspicions about it, but Garland gaslit him into ignoring those thoughts.

12 - Absolutely has tried to dye his hair and his tail once. It went horribly and he couldn't get all the dye out. It was all a faded blueish colour for weeks

Luneth

3 - His hair is always in his face because he enjoys playing with it/having others play with it. But, he doesn't enjoy it against his neck at the same time so, ponytail. Not really practical, but that's not important.

4 - "Slacking off saved her from the curse, so maybe that 'luck' might rub off on us!"

I cant explain why this one sticks out to me, but Luneth and the rest of the party actually acting like kids and joking around is really sweet? Idk I guess I love that theres a bunch of moments we can see them enjoying their journey and not just be silent strong protagonists.

Sephiroth

3 - Literal cat eyes. They glow, his pupils shrink and widen with mood. He has cat eyes.

4 - "We'll meet again soon."

Just Sephiroth and Zack talking in that entire scene. The small smile when Zack says "I'll hold you to that" the notice that Zack wanted to say something before he left. It's one of my favourite CC Sephiroth moments.

Tseng

3 - Really enjoys wearing longer socks. Knee or thigh high are preferable, and 90% of them are just black. He organizes them so he doesnt grab two different lengths (which has happened a few times before)

4 - "There is nothing more precious than a human life"

It's SUCH a development for me to see Tseng say this. Consider all that he does, and all that he has done. He may commit atrocious deeds for Shinra, but he's failed missions to help random Shinra employees before, he's put himself at risk to protect others.

16 - Tseng's darkest secret that he won't admit is that he absolutely hates Shinra. Without a doubt he does wonder what life would have been like if he stayed in Wutai. Would he have stayed at the Temple? Would he had left anyways? What if what if what if. He will not admit this thought crosses his mind and tries to tell himself it's just hypothetical. But it's a thought that does come up more often just before Rufus becomes president.

Vincent

3 - Refuses to cut his hair. Even a trim it takes a long time to convince him. He's not gonna die anytime soon so whose gonna see the mess it becomes anyways. But he still takes pretty good care of it- mostly

4 - "I don't care what you are doing, so much as the idiotic way that you are doing it."

The tired dad quote of the year bc god dammit the party is a bunch if teenagers and their old man needs a fuckin nap so he can stop telling them dont put that in your mouth

Yazoo

3 - Vegetarian. He just doesnt like meat- usually he just takes whatever meat he gets on food and pushes it to the side or gives it to his brothers. He has picked a burger apart to take the patty out and just eaten it like that, just sides and bun.

4 - "I will not have you refer to Mother that way!"

One of the VERY few times that Yazoo actually shows emotions??? P l e a s e. I love him so much and actually getting to see that cool exterior crack is so interesting.

23 - As a candle Yazoo would be a more woodsy kind of scent. Damp earth, firewood, stagnant waters. There's a slight spice mixed in as well, like a faint hint of cinnamon.

[raccoonfallsharder]

hii tiny lil violet anon here :DD sadly i havent been able to work on rocket fic bc suddenly theres been a huge influx in work to do & i’ve been super tired ߹𖥦߹ i hope youre doing well though! just wanted to pop in and wish you a nice day ٩( ᐛ )و♡

(side note: out of curiosity, how did you get into guardians of the galaxy and rocket specifically?)

tiny lil violet nonnie, you are too sweet && this made my morning thank yoooou ‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚. i’m sorry your work has gotten in the way of you doing more enjoyable things, and im so sorry it has you so exhausted! i hope you get to rest soon ♡

i’ve always loved comics but i was not really a marvel kid — mostly a dc/image/mirage kid. i’ve also always loved comics adaptions (my dad and i had a complicated relationship to put it mildly BUT i think we saw every batman movie ever made together, before the dceu…. happened). so i fell very easily into the marvel movies when they started coming out (except the hulk movies. i don’t believe in those.)

anyway i honestly just saw gotg 1 because it was a comic book movie. i didn’t know much about it walking in. i actually didn’t love the first movie in my first viewing. i can’t remember why - maybe i already hated chris pratt lol. i know i thought starlord as a character was kinda…boring. but what saved the movie for me was groot (adored him) and rocket (the minute we saw that fuckin raccoon’s back i was like…wtf why isn’t this movie about him??).

and you know. there was the snark. the voice. all that. i was in denial but it was there. im just predisposed to love a grumpy wounded person desperately trying to hide a heart of gold

then gotg 2 came out and i loved it. it was probably in my top three favorite marvel movies. it was so good i think it made the first movie better??? we got to see so much more of not just rocket’s backstory but who he is. how he interacts with people he loves. how he self-sabotages. how he shows care. i just wanted to bundle him up and protect him. and aside from rocket, this is also where i fell in love with yondu. and i am a sucker for a sibling dynamic (startling no-one) so i loved the nebula & gamora arc too.

i probably started rewatching both movies at this point. not obsessively but they were definitely comfort rewatches. and partner has the marvel unlimited app so i was catching up on a lot of the comics

narrative structure is also really important to me and i have a rigorous list of what makes a “”good” trilogy (different t from what makes a “fun” trilogy) and gotg is like. one of two or three trilogies that make the cut.

then 3. ugh. once the first trailer came out and it was clearly focused on rocket, i stayed away from all gotg media. put a pause on reading the comics — everything. i wanted to go in with no preconceived notions. a few things had happened to me in the year or so prior to the movie coming out. i’ll skip explaining those because they require their own content warnings and this is already very long but suffice it to say i was predisposed to feel very strongly about this movie.

so. 3 broke my heart but it also put it back together. i think it might be the most realistically hopeful movie i’ve ever seen. from a narrative perspective, each character is so loved by gunn. they were each given the ending they needed and deserved. but also i felt like the message of the movie was this:

no matter how fucked up and ugly you think you or your past are, you deserve to allow yourself the possibility of joy & connection.

and i just. i needed that. as a mental health professional, i think almost all the clients ive ever worked with have needed that. i think a lot of the world needs that.

anyway that’s how i fell in love

starlord still bores me tho

[abbatoirablaze]

Ex Wive's Club, Chapter 24

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: major angst, mentions of medical situations, implied smut

“J-James…what are you doing here?” she asked nervously, looking at her ex-husband.

“I missed you guys,” he admitted with a sad huff.  He took a step towards Melissa and she put a hand on his chest, stopping him.  His eyes closed and she nervously looked over her shoulder, “I miss you so much, baby…”

“You’re with your new little toy,” she reminded him, resisting every urge within herself to just pull him against her, “James…”

“I don’t care,” he admitted, “she’s not you.  No one is ever going to be you.  I need you, Mel.”

“James…” He took another step forward, and the amount of space between them was almost nonexistent.  She could smell the calming notes in his natural scent and how it mingled perfectly with the cologne he wore, “We-we can’t do this…”

“I know you miss me too,” he reminded her as his large hands wrapped around her waist and he pressed his lower half against hers, “I know there’s only one cock that can stretch you right…make you a quivering mess beneath me…I know you’re not with him anymore because of it...”

Her eyes snapped up to his, and he saw the same love that was always there for him.  He knew that he’d spoken the truth with her, and how on-point he really was. 

“J-Jasper is still up…”

Bucky’s brow quirked, “what?”

“It’s New Years, James…he wanted to stay up…”

“It’s two AM…”

“He’s as stubborn as his father.”

Bucky couldn’t help but smirk at her comment, “yeah…is that such a bad thing though?  I mean…I hear his dad makes up for it in other ways?”

“Oh?” she teased playfully, unable to stay firm with the man she loved, “you think so?”

“Mhmmm,” he nodded, leaning forward a little more until their lips pressed together, “he knows how to really make mommy moan.”

“J-James,” she moaned softly as his hands slid under her shirt and bra until he was cupping her breasts, toying with her hardening nipples.  He pushed her against the door frame ever so slightly, pressing his erection against her abdomen, “oh god…”

“You feel that, baby?” he asked gently, rocking his hips so that she could feel him on her toned stomach, “every bit of that’s for you…he misses you so much…misses being home…”

“We-we have to be quiet,” she said quickly, breaking the kiss.  She took a step back and looked over her shoulder once more, “g-go to my room…I-I’ll get Jas tucked away for the night…”

Bucky couldn’t help as his smirk built for the second time in just the few short minutes, “you’ll let me stay?”

“When I come into my room…you better be naked on my bed waiting for me!” she advised as she took a step back, “and I want everything, James…”

“You have me, baby…”

“Where’s Mel?” Bucky asked as he looked around the room, “Where’s my wife?”

“It’s falling through…” he sighed, shaking his head, “I-I mean…I’m not mad at it or anything…I should have expected it…but it’s still shocking to me…”

“Yeah…”

He looked over at his ex-wife and he sighed, “I-I know I shouldn’t be coming to you with this…I’m sorry Mel…”

“I called you,” she reminded him, the smallest of scoffs leaving her lips, “my engagement blows up in my face and the first person I call was my ex-husband…don’t be mad at yourself for spilling your guts to me when I did the same thing to you.”

“You’re too good for him, Mel.”

“And you’re too good for Talia…” she added, giving him a sad look, “I-I know you probably think that she was some amazing person, and you’re upset because it didn’t work…but who aborts a pregnancy after telling their partner…who does that?”

“She had her reasons, Mel…”

“I never would have done something like that to you, James…”

He gave her a sad frown, “well I wish I could say that I’d never do what that asshole fiancé of yours did…”

“Steve was your problem,” she reminded him as her hand fell to his thigh, “that guy…he had way more issues than Steve…he thought I was fucking around all by himself…”

“Yeah…”

“Kinda funny though,” she laughed, “the one time I’m not fucking you behind a guy’s back is the only time I get accused of it…”

“Hey Mel?”

“Yeah?”

He reached down and took her hand in his own.  She gave their hands a sad look before lacing their fingers, “I still love you, Mel…”

“We can’t keep spinning around on this carousel James…”

“Maybe we were meant to be together though…” he sighed, “I mean…we fucked up a lot…but we always keep coming back to each other…maybe we should try for real.”

“I’m not falling back into that,” she said, shaking her head, “you always get turned around by Steve, and now that he and Cami have the gir-“

“Mel…you and I were meant to love each other…”

“And I always will love you…bu-“

She didn’t get to finish the words, as Bucky’s lips came crashing against hers.  Instead she moaned as his teeth gently tugged on her bottom lip. 

“Let me make you feel good, Mel…” he begged, maneuvering himself so that the was hovering over her on the bed.  He went to pull away, and he got his answer as she pulled him by the fabric of his shirt back to her lips.

“Don’t leave…” she begged softly as her hands worked on his jeans, while her lips captured his once again.

“Never leaving you again, baby!” he promised.

“Mr. Barnes…” a nurse called, bringing him back to reality.  Monte was sleeping soundly in his arms, as though he had no idea what had happened behind the doors he wasn’t able to go through.

“She lost a lot of blood, Bucky…” Dr. Cho said sadly as she looked over father and son, “she-she insisted that we get Monte first…”

“No…” he cried, shaking his head.  A few more tears slipped down his cheeks as he looked at his youngest, “she-we talked about it…they were both going to be okay…Cho…she-“

“If you’d be willing to put Monte down, I’ll take you to her!” she offered sadly. 

Bucky looked between his sleeping son and Cho.  He took a few sad steps over to the bassinet and laid him down before turning back to the doctor, “Wh-where is she?”

“Mom…dad…come take a picture!” Cami called, waving over to her parents from her younger brother’s side, “Come on, let’s get a family picture for Jas’ birthday!”

“YEAH!” Jasper cheered happily, from his spot beside his sister while she held one of the twins, “Mom! DAD!  COME ON!”

“Steve, bring Stephanie over!” Cami smiled, sitting Jamie beside Jasper.  Bucky looked at his ex wife from across the room.  She was in a skin-tight dress that seemed to lick her every curve. 

She was sin incarnate, wearing a paper birthday cone hat. 

“Who’s going to take the picture?” Mel asked, sauntering over to the table where the kids were sat. 

“Steve?” Cami asked hopefully, “I can hold each of the twins from behind and make sure they don’t fall off the bench.”

“Come on, Buck!” Steve nodded, tapping his friend on the chest, “YEAH!  We’ll be right over, bunny!”

“You’re okay with not being in the photo?” Bucky asked his friend, “I mean the girls-“

“I’ve got plenty of time for family photos with the girls…plus, I can always switch out with Mel once you guys get your photo with her in it.”

“Yeah…” Bucky agreed, only half paying attention while he followed his friend over to the table.  Steve sat Stephanie down on the other side of Jasper and reached for his wife’s camera. 

“Mom…dad…you two stand on either side of me.  I’ll be behind Jas!” Cami ordered.

“I don’t mind holding one of the babies…” Mel offered, “if that makes it easier.  You know I love my grandbabies!”

“It’s okay mom…I want them on either side of Jas.”

Jasper smiled wide and wrapped his arms around his nieces before looking to Melissa, “everyone came, mommy.  Just like you promised!”

“I told you!” she smiled, playfully blowing her noisemakers at her son.  Jasper giggled and looked to his father.

“Everyone’s here.”

“Make a wish, buddy!” Bucky smiled, looking at his ex-wife, knowing that later that night he’d be coming back to the house. 

Mel popped her tongue against her cheek, teasing the super and he licked his lips, mouthing, ‘don’t tease me.’

Her eyes flickered down to his jeans, and he had to stop the growl that wanted to make it’s way up his throat.  His own eyes trailed down her body; curves that he had memorized like a roadmap lived in his memories.  All of the times that the two of them were together.  Every kiss upon every inch of her. 

He was almost thrown from his fantasies when he felt the noisemaker brush past his cheek. 

And what normally would have startled him, he only smiled as her melodic giggle filled his head.

“James you’re supposed to look at the camera,” she teased playfully, blowing the noisemaker at him once more.  He chuckled, pulling it from her lips and wrapped his arm around her waist.  She gasped, and he heard her heart race against his chest, “James…”

“I’m putting another one in you, tonight after he goes to bed!” he whispered huskily into her ear. 

A shiver ran down her spine and she pulled away, ever so slightly, looking at him, “Ja-James!”

“My turn for a picture with the birthday boy and the rest of the family!” Steve urged, breaking up the moment between the couple. 

Both of them looked at him, and it was Mel who snapped out of her stupor, “ye-yeah…yeah…I’m sorry Steve.”

“One more picture, mom?” Jasper asked, “please!”

Her eyes met Bucky’s for a moment before she shook her head, “y-you guys should get a picture with Steve.  I-I’ll take it.”

“Stupid Steve!” Jasper grumbled under his breath, “my wish almost worked…”

“Dad?”

Bucky looked up, shocked to see his daughter standing in the hall, “Cami…wh-what are you doing-“

“The nurse came and got me…I-she’s waiting for Jasper to come out of the bathroom…w-why do you look like that?” she asked nervously, “Wh-what happened?  Where’s mom?  Where’s Monte?”

“Dad?” Jasper asked, breaking up the awkward moment.  Bucky’s eyes snapped to his, and it was like he could read his father’s reactions, “Where’s mom?”

“James…wh-what are you doing here?”

He smiled, his charm seemingly filling up the room as he stood in its center, “what’s it look like, baby?  I came to take care of my girls…”

“James…we should-“

“You’re pregnant with our second child,” he teased as he stepped forward a little, his hand already falling to the plush towel that covered his lower half, “I don’t think there’s a rule to what she should and shouldn’t do right now.”

A shiver ran down her spine as he stalked towards her, his towel riding low on his hips.  Her eyes followed it, and he smiled a little more, practically able to smell how aroused she was as he untucked it and allowed the towel to fall to the ground.

“James Buchanan Barnes…”

“Yeah, doll?” he smirked.  His hand trailed down to his erect cock and he began pumping himself.  His eyes caught sight of her thighs clenching together before they closed, “do you want to feel me pounding away at that pretty little pussy?  Want to feel me inside of you?”

“Yes…” she moaned softly. 

His eyes fluttered open and he saw how desperate she was for him.  His confident little exotic dancer was staring at him as though he was a steak and she was a lioness on the prowl.

“Do you want me to cum in you, doll?”

“James…please…”

“Come here!” he ordered softly, wanting her to finish filling the distance between the two of them. 

"Where the hell is my wife, Cho?" Bucky asked, tears streaming down his cheeks.

Chapter 25

Tag List:  @Cjand10, @huntress-artemiss, @lohnes16, @tenaciousperfectionunknown, @teambarnes72, @elbell20-blog, @sebsgirl71479, @prokey16

[kitttenteeth]

I know what you mean having a lot of animals and them being a big responsibility. The animals I grew up with, my mother just happen to take in because they were strays and she’s always had a soft spot for animals but having had so many for years I think she realizes how expensive they can be and they quite literally keep you poor with all the vet bills and food costs and forget it when they get attacked by other animals it’s devastating financially and emotionally. You have such a good kind heart to put up with that all and I bet you don’t even mind because you love your animals so much. I know you also cannot just part with them either because that is also very difficult. I wish you a lot of luck! The best thing you can do for your babies is hustle hard at a job and get that bread to support them! Truly wish you the best kitty! 🐈‍⬛ I hope the beautiful spark I see within you shines bright again as well…

i cried just a liiitle bit Gah. thankyou so much anon t-t My boyfriend is rly the only person who reassures me that the things i do for the animals r special / important and that everything I do to get them 2 a quality of life they deserve isn’t dramatic so . it is just rly nice to hear words like that Thank u.. and my dad is much the same. I know he rly adores animals but has always just done what i feel is the barest minimum &if u can’t keep them happy + healthy + well - fed Then idk.don’t fuckin buy any more animals ! my mom also loves animals but I would describe her as sort of prissy Doesn’t wna get her hands dirty with things like that (except for any feline She would shower jn blood 4 them) and she sees me as a drama queen . Anyways When it gets hard It rly srsly does leave u devastated & helpless and . so much money LOL I am rly fortunate i’ve been able to afford what I can so far , idk if ppl generally understand how expensive just the food alone is for certain animals? Especially PEACOCKS n DUCKS ;-; god lol. i rlyly wish it didn’t have to come down 2 money . Thank U truly so much for ur words & the good luck i feel like i rly need it Lol. *sadSad meow* I will work hard! my dream Is still most def becoming a tattoo artist & owning my own shop But thru all of this i realized taking care of animals rly has always been the one only thing that makes me most fulfilled , i would rly love2 work towards a future where I can do more things like that. But money lol So we will see. nyways Thank u thank you 🐾 ! 🐈‍⬛

[mymarifae]

sighs... i adore the finale of mlp: friendship is magic so much. there was clearly a lot of love put into those last three episodes, and you can just feel the writers and the artists fondly bidding these characters one last farewell, y’know? it’s the (bitter)sweet ending this special show deserved.

but also, while the writers bring twilight and her friends’ story to a very clear end, they (pretty masterfully, if i do say so myself) leave room for equestria’s story to continue. everything was set up for generation 5 to showcase how equestria and the lands beyond have evolved and how twilight’s legacy lives on!

so i’m just kind of flummoxed by how it’s... not.

like. generation 5 wants to be its own thing, and that’s fine. but it also desperately wants to be this seamless continuation of generation 4 and it’s like. um. you can’t be both, man. in its attempt to juggle both of these ideas, it just completely fuckin’ retcons 9 seasons of worldbuilding and development.

where are the winter spirits (not using their canon name because Naur)? you know, the ones that feed off of animosity and fighting? where are the dragons? the hippogriffs/sea ponies? the changelings? the griffins? the yaks? where is the crystal empire? how have 0 records of twilight’s literal School Of Friendship survived? how are there not even simple legends about nightmare moon and her defeat, or tirek and his defeat(s), or chrysalis, or anything?? how has all that world-defining history just been lost?

where is star swirl and the other pillars? ... ok granted they’re probably not immortal but again: not even a whisper of their legacy has remained?? what about celestia and luna? or starlight glimmer’s!?!? out of all the most powerful ponies equestria has ever seen, you mean to tell me only the image of twilight and her friends has stuck around . and that like Two ponies (sunny and her dad) are familiar with them.

where the fuck is discord*

(* comics i have not read are not being acknowledged atm. because really - a character with literally unlimited magic who is deeply tied to the mane 6 and would have been dedicated to maintaining their legacy and protecting equestria for eons to come should have come up in the movie/show by now)

why am i supposed to care about opaline when season 9 of fim ends with two of the most spiteful, interesting antagonists the show has ever introduced (i love cozy glow and i think she’s a fascinating character and i wish the show had more time to dive into why she’s like that, but i’m reluctant to put her on tirek and chrysalsis’ level. she’s like 11) are encased in stone, and since we know that sort of magic-stone-imprisonment is not permanent...? like ??? get this random (and frankly, Ugly) alicorn out of my face i want to know what happened with THAT before you go trying to establish any new Big Baddies

i wouldn’t have as many issues with a new generation/make your mark if it wasn’t determined to cling to fim as its foundation. but since it is.......... what the fuck is going on. why are you paying homage to one of the best iterations of my little pony when you can’t even keep the worldbuilding straight for 2 minutes

[mahoushoujotechsupport]

finally have time to continue my rewatch, so on to episode 9

again another one of my favorites and the grassley duel is probably my favorite fight of the series tbh

worth noting that miorine doesnt seem bothered that shaddiq comes to check up on her. gotta wonder how often he'd swing by, though i think it's safe to say absolutely not often enough that he would show he actually gives a shit

ok idk how i didnt notice it in the op after so many times but that fuckin door is there again.... i'm just going to hyperfixate on this dumb gold door that probably doesn't mean anything besides being another nod to utena

lol it honestly kills me that under difference circumstances (aka if shaddiq didnt have his head so far up his ass), they really could have been good friends. instead his decision to stay relatively distant and put up his cunning business front results in miorine (rightly) not trusting him at all.

right before miorine challenges shaddiq, there's a real fast cut to him tightening his fist on the table and i gotta wonder how in the world he thought he'd be able to just talk this out after basically screwing miorine over like this and then trying to extort her lol. yea he was ready to have to duel if it came down to it, but like cmon man just be normal for once

god i wish we could've seen secelia just dig into lauda more lmao

i love that miorine knows how to play the stupid game all these people play just as well as all of them but god am i glad that at the end of it all she doesnt have to deal with any of this shit anymore

lol i really wanna know how no one had noticed nika having secret meetings and sending secret messages for months tbh like chuchu even makes a comment asking where nika is in the scene before this one so she probably just disappared at random times but anime logic lol ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

up until this moment when miorine tells shaddiq that he's just like everyone else in the group, did this guy think that anything he's done (or really, hasn't done) would have made miorine think differently?

the look on his face here as miorine stops him from entering her most sacred of spaces just really says it all. like he can't fathom that miorine legitimately does not think positively of him

this is definitely one of my favorite scenes from the whole series. just showcasing how highly suletta thinks of miorine. whereas miorine was upset suletta agreed to a duel with elan a few episodes back, suletta just never questions miorine challenging shaddiq

this has gotta be the moment shaddiq realizes suletta is a "rival" for miorine's heart, yea?

i know what you are, sabina

lol these dorks

lmao miorine, you're so ruthless

on a serious note, someone please write a random student from asticassia pov fic because like imagine seeing all this going on from some rando's pov. the benerit group princess who hates everyone and has been trying to fuck off as far as possible suddenly forms a business and now she's challenging people to duels????

imagine if vim had sucessfully murdered delling and he just left guel as bob the builder for the rest of his life. why in the hell did he have to go by bob lmao

omg did we all collectively forget that the second school shooting episode wasn't the first time she's done this?!

so glad our little tanuki calls this bozo out on this shit. all you had to do was be a normal human being lol

the funny thing about shaddiq's little monologue here is that it's all his feelings under the assumption that miorine would forever be trapped within the confines of the benerit group and the stupid game her dad made up. and yeah, i suppose in that respect, he's partially right... but if he knew miorine well at all and not some idealized version of her, he'd know she wants nothing to do with any of that

bless you, gjm for making this loser seem more unhinged just by choosing to translate onna as bitch lmao

even secelia and rouji are just like uhhhhhhh

oh this is real nice juxtaposed with episode 24's "i'm a selfish person"

be selfish all you want, little tanuki, you deserve it

aerial hitting permet score six is such an iconic shot lmao this episode and this part specifically gave me goosebumps like a little loser the first time i saw it as the witch from mercury song starts playing

omg i am so excited that i preordered a permet score six aerial from p-bandai lmao look at her shes so cool all in blue

same, prospera, same

will never forget how happy i was when the till-chuchu headshot happens lmao, it still rules

i hope if gwitch ever gets a recap movie or movies that we get the moment miorine finds out about ericht and aerial. as aerial hits permet score six and suletta is talking to her, we see miorine visibly confused over suletta talking to her mobile suit... and i just really really want to see miorine's reaction to finding out about eri on top of her inner thoughts on suletta talking to aerial. like at first i'm sure she thought it was some quirky thing especially calling it her sister, but it's gotta be something she was like wtf about, right?

made it to image limit so no more pics but one thing that's respectable about shaddiq is him realizing at the end of this episode that there really is something special between miorine and suletta even if perhaps at this point the two of them haven't outright acknowledged it. we see him acknowledge in ep 7 that miorine is becoming a better version of herself from suletta's influence on her, but him bringing up dueling for her hand in marriage, to me at least, is him hanging up his towel when it comes to miorine because he realized suletta really won her heart over - he literally says "maybe you'd have let me in [to the greenhouse]"

lmao i really tried to not go overboard with screenshots but oh well

lets see if i can finish cour 1 tomorrow

[dynamic-power]

The Happiness We Deserve

Chapter 4

Read it here on ao3

Rated E

Words: 2k (6.4k total)

No CW

Ian comes home

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

-----

“I’m sorry,” was the first thing Jay said when Mickey answered the phone the next day. 

Mickey had been prepared to argue with him some more, so his rushed apology before Mickey could even say “hello” came as a bit of a shock. He wanted to say something, anything, but Jay barrelled on before he could. 

“I shouldn’t have said those things. I don’t know Ian, or what you two went through. I should have listened to you. I do wish you had told me all of this earlier, but I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Mickey said, finally finding his voice. “I shouldn’t have hid the truth about Ian.”

“I understand why you did. I mean, I don’t understand , but I-”

“Yeah, I get what you mean.” Mickey put Jay onto speaker, laying himself out on his bed and setting his phone on his chest. “It’s just hard. Talking about him. Because he was there through a lot of the shit.”

“He helped you through it.”

“More than that,” Mickey said, dragging his hands over his face. “When I say he was there, I mean he was there . Like, in the fuckin’ room.” 

Mickey heard Jay inhale sharply, but he didn’t say anything. 

“When I got shot the first time, Ian was standing right next to me. The second time, he was our fuckin’ getaway driver. When I came out, he was part of the fight, throwing and taking punches with me. When my dad… When Terry brought Svetlana to the house, his fuckin’ gun was pointed at Ian. It’s not just that Ian was in my life when shit went down. This shit happened to him just as much as it happened to me. The shit that he went through…” Mickey paused, remembering Ian at his worst, the lows of depression and the highs of mania. “The shit he went through was my shit, too.”

“Oh.” Jay was quiet for another minute, but Mickey didn’t really know what to say, so he let the silence linger. “Mick,” Jay finally said, “fuck. I’m sorry. He’s… he’s kind of a big fuckin’ deal.”

Mickey scoffed, scratching at his chest absently, letting his fingers pause over Ian’s name inked into his chest. “Yeah, to me, he was. He was the closest thing to a best friend I ever had when I was growing up.”

“How do you feel about him coming back?”

“I don’t know,” Mickey said. Part of him wanted to leave it at that; the mess of feelings he was experiencing surrounding Ian were hard for him to try to sift through; let alone try to explain them to Jay. But he knew Jay deserved to know, deserved to understand before meeting Ian. “I mean, I do know,” he clarified, “but it’s just… it’s a lot. I’m a mess, Jay, I’m fucked up, and you’re going to get to see some of that, I think.”

“I’m here for you, querido, no matter how fucked up you think you are.” There was another pause, and Mickey could sense that Jay had something else he wanted to ask. When he finally posed the question, it was soft, cautious; like Mickey was a deer Jay was trying not to startle. “Do you still love him?”

Did Mickey still love Ian?

He thought about it for a minute, glad that Jay didn’t press him for an answer immediately. The truth was, Mickey did still love him. It was hard not to, with all they’d gone through together. He still felt a lot of intense emotions if he thought about Ian too much, and he was dreading the idea of having to parse through them all. 

But was Mickey still in love with him?

“I don’t know the guy anymore,” Mickey said, avoiding the question as best as he could. “We’ve been apart way longer than we were ever involved with each other. Fuck, we were kids the last time I saw him.”

“You still care about him, though.” It wasn’t an accusation, just a statement of fact. 

“Yeah.”

“Well, I look forward to meeting him tomorrow. If you’d still like me to be there?”

Relief washed through Mickey as his whole body relaxed into his mattress. “Yeah, Jay. Yeah, I’d still like you to be there.”

“Hi,” Jay said as he climbed out of his car in front of the Gallagher house Sunday night. “You look nice.” He paused, clearly hesitant. Mickey smiled at him and closed the distance between them, taking his hand. 

“Thanks. So do you.” He kissed Jay before tugging him up the stairs towards the house. “You ready for this?”

“I never feel ready for the chaos of this household,” Jay said as he eyed the front door warily. 

“You’ll get used to it.”

“You keep saying that, and I never do,” Jay replied with a laugh as Mickey knocked loudly on the door. 

“It’s open!” Lip hollered from somewhere inside. 

Mickey swung the door open. Chaos was the perfect word for the Gallagher house; with the four siblings, two spouses, the kids, and Mickey, there was never a dull moment. Mickey loved it. This was the kind of chaos that he chose to embrace, not the kind that was forced on him. He felt like family here, and had since the day Lip had invited him in five years ago. 

The noise of conversation and laughter greeted them first, followed soon by the sea of bodies trying to move around each other in the kitchen and living room. There were a few cheers of, “Uncle Mick!” that had Mickey grinning and looking around to spot his nieces and nephews. 

Instead, he spotted Ian, at the same time that Ian spotted him. 

Green eyes narrowed for a moment before Ian seemed to recognize him, and then Mickey found himself the target of a wide, contagious smile. “Mickey!”

Ian had been 18 the last time Mickey had seen him. He’d grown up. And fuck, he was just as attractive as Mickey thought he’d be. He seemed taller, Mickey realized as Ian strode across the room, with broad shoulders and muscled arms and flat stomach and wow. Mickey thought his heart was about to beat out of his chest as emotions, too many and too intense to name, fluttered through his chest.

Ian had his arms out and Mickey only realized what was happening a moment before he was wrapped up in Ian’s embrace. The hug was simultaneously foreign and familiar and Mickey couldn’t help but hug him back. 

“Holy shit,” Ian said, pulling away to hold Mickey at arm's length. “You look good, Mick.”

“Uh, thanks,” Mickey answered, not totally believing him. “You do, too.” He heard someone clear their throat to his right and turned to grin at his boyfriend. “Sorry. Uh, Jay, this is Ian Gallagher. Ian, this is my boyfriend, Jay Flores.”

Ian beamed at Jay, immediately letting go of Mickey to offer him a hand. “Good to meet you, man. Uh, Doug isn’t here- sorry, my boyfriend. He’s working tonight, so he’ll be here tomorrow. I can’t wait for you all to meet him.”

Mickey opened his mouth to say something- what, he wasn’t sure- when Ian’s attention was dragged away again and he left the pair behind. To Mickey’s relief, when he turned to Jay, he just looked amused. 

“I can see why you fell for him. Hot damn.”

Mickey laughed and swatted at Jay. “Fuck off. Come on, let’s find Carl.”

A few hours and a couple of drinks later, Mickey stepped out for a smoke, surprised to find Ian already sitting on the stairs. He closed the door with a little more force than necessary and let his feet fall heavily as he crossed the porch so Ian knew he was coming. When he sat, Ian smiled at him. 

“Lip says you’re some sort of fuckin’ superhero,” Mickey said, pulling his smokes out of his pocket. When he reached for his lighter, Ian waved him off and reached over to light Mickey’s cigarette for him. “Thanks.”

“Sure. Uh, not a superhero. Just a paramedic.”

“Same thing, right?”

Ian laughed, deep and light. Mickey had forgotten how wonderful that sound was. “No. Not quite. I do try my best. Every once in a while, we get lucky.”

“What does your boyfriend do?”

“Doug?” Ian asked, leaning back on his arms and stretching his legs out. “He’s, uh, a model?” He posed it more like a question than a statement.

Mickey scoffed. “I’m sure he’s attractive but you don’t have to exaggerate.”

“Nah, man, I’m serious,” Ian said, laughing again. He shifted closer to Mickey for a moment, reaching into his pocket and pulling out his phone. He unlocked it and flipped through a few photos before turning the screen towards Mickey. “He’s actually a model.”

A fucking underwear model looked back up at him from Ian’s phone. He was the definition of tall, dark, and handsome. He had brown hair that was cut short on the sides and styled artfully on top and fuck-me eyes that were so dark they were nearly black. High cheekbones, perfect nose, sharp jaw, six-pack abs. And christ, what a smile. It was the kind of smile that could charm a fucking nun into bed.

“Holy shit,” Mickey breathed out. “ That’s your boyfriend?”

“Hot, right?” Ian said, sounding as though he didn’t believe it himself. “He’s doing a shoot with Calvin Klein tonight.”

“How the fuck did you stumble your way into a relationship with a fuckin’ model?”

“Car crash,” Ian said, leaning back again and slipping his phone back into his pocket. “He got hit and my ambulance was the one who answered the call. He was fine, just a few scratches that I had to patch up, but he thought I was charming for some crazy reason and slipped me his number. Took me a few weeks to find the balls to text, but. Well. I did.”

“How long?” Mickey asked, mirroring Ian’s position against the stairs. 

“Six months. It’s good. Best relationship I’ve been in since- well. Since I left.” They were silent for a few moments before Ian turned his bright green gaze on Mickey. “How about you and Jay? He seems like a good guy.”

“He is. He’s not southside, obviously. He got turned around and wound up at the Alibi. Ended up sticking around for a few drinks at the bar, and then back at mine. He just kinda… never fuckin’ left after that.”

Ian chuckled. “That’s right, Carl mentioned you work for him.”

Mickey raised an eyebrow. “Is that what the fucker is saying?”

“Ah, I thought that sounded wrong. No way is Carl running the Alibi without someone helping him with the numbers.”

“That’s me, co-owner and numbers guy,” Mickey joked. 

“You know,” Ian said, voice suddenly going soft, “I wasn’t sure that I was going to see you while I was here. Figured you might lay low until I was gone again.”

“To be honest,” Mickey admitted, “I wasn’t sure I was going to see you, either.”

“What changed?”

“Lip offered to keep you away, and I realized how stupid that was. We’re grown ass adults, we can act like it, right?” Mickey turned and met Ian’s eyes. His gaze was intense, magnetic. Mickey couldn’t look away; he didn’t want to. 

“Right,” Ian said. “Grown ass adults.” 

He turned away again, but Mickey kept looking, taking in his profile. The sharpness of his jaw, the stubble that grew there, his full lips, the pale column of his neck. 

“You know, I’ve got a life back in New York. A boyfriend, an apartment, a fuckin’ cat. It’s good.”

Mickey hummed. He was genuinely happy for him. He didn’t feel any of the sour feelings he’d expected; no regret, no jealousy, no animosity. No love beyond the friendly feelings he had towards all of the Gallaghers. Just honest happiness to be sitting out here with Ian. 

Ian turned to him again, a warm smile crossing his lips as he bumped his knee against Mickey’s. Something warm curled in the pit of Mickey’s belly and he ignored it. “But,” Ian continued, so softly that Mickey had to lean closer to hear him, “it’s really fuckin’ good to be back here, Mick.”

-----

Part 5

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

Smol, Ask Game - Yakuza I'm curious

So. Full disclosure. I've only played Kiwami and 0, and am like...most of the way through Kiwami 2? So any knowledge I have of the rest of the franchise is via Tumblr and reading Majima's Wiki page (that's how I got here) So do bear with me lol.

3 male characters I love: To the shock of no one, Goro Majima. RGG really just made The Best Fictional Character Ever and just use him less and less huh I KNOW a lot of the characterisation came LONG after the first 6 games but IT STILL STANDS. Also also, Akira Nishikiyama. I know I've been more stuck on him recently but he's shoved his way to the front of my brain, but I still love Majima. They are both my boyfriends <3. Now hmmm, who gets the third spot....I know he was around for MUCH less time than I thought he would be, but I'm gonna say Homare Nishitani. He's a fucked up horny freak, he's just ACTUALLY a mad bastard and he loves it and I love him for it. I genuinely wish we got to fight him more it also makes fic more difficult cause I'm like 'wait when can he show up how does Sunshine fit in WHAT IS THE TIMELI-'. He's great, even though that first fight was very fucking bitchy.

3 female characters I love: Bold of you to assume there's more than 3 characters for me to pick from. Nah but uhhhh, can we count Yuko Nishikiyama when all my love for her is basically based on my own personal headcanons and interpretations? Let's call her a bonus option. Obviously Makoto Makimura, like I don't think I need to explain that do I? I think I also have to go withhhh.... Hibiki-chan and Yuki-chan. The fucking LORE IMPLICATIONS of Goromi's dress being a custom-made pink-snakeskin version of Hibiki's outfit?? And she was probably one of the most in love with him, idk she's just very sweet I love her. And Yuki is so cringefail but she thinks she's girlboss, I love that. Honestly I love all the Sunshine girls, more importantly I love the 'spares', yknow, the Golds and Silvers and Bronzes but I've mentioned that before, I should give them their own post.

3 romantic ships I love: Good morning Majimako nation :) It's a ship that brings me nothing but pain in canon and I love them so much, so thank God for fic writers vbhjnbhjn. I say canon brings me pain but they're just so cute and they understand each other's pain in a way others can't and it's like...all Majima had to do was give her closure, yknow? There's such a tragedy to it but I love them all the same. Also shoutout to the 7 other Majinishiki shippers out there. Yes I just put my two favourite beautiful men together. But the more I think about it the more I'm like "oh but this could be SO GOOD" cause they're both assholes and would both dislike each other and reckon they're polar opposites, which they appear to be on the surface, but they're more similar than they think and the idea of them learning that and being like "oh wait a minute....oh hang on...". They could be fun and funny and beautiful and hot so yeah, I've gotten real into it lol. Now....you know, I could pick the obvious, but it's time to push another agenda: Majima x Dolly. Yep. As in Doll Girl's mum. Look her kid has already decided he's her new dad, why not make it official? I just think Dolly is super cute, she's one of my favourite girls, and idk man it's really cute even though 0 content exists gvbhnjbhjn

3 platonic dynamics I love: Yuki and Majima's sibling bond means the world to me. Two cringefail weirdgirls who take turns being weird. Like one does something weird/stupid and the other is like "bro what the fuck is wrong with you" but then they switch and it's a constant bickering back and forth but you can tell it comes from a place of affection, and at the end of the day they do have each other's backs. Speaking of siblings, Nishiki and Kiryu. Yeah took my time bringing up the fuckin' protagonist didn't I? For all my Complicated Feelings towards Kiryu, his brotherly connection to Nishiki is clearer in 0 than it is in Kiwami, but when it's there it's there, man. These boys have each other's backs, they're the closest family they have, and seeing it fractured so tragically is heartbreaking. I wish they had more Heat Actions but the one they do have is delightful. OH, sorry, I had to take a minute irl to think of another platonic dynamic and I remembered: Kiryu and Rina. Yeah, the lesbian hostess from Kiwami who got the job to look at cute girls! The one who told Kiryu he can be wooed by men if he wants and he told her to not judge girls on such a binary femme/butch scale (well, 'cute/not cute'). I loved going to chat with her, they're really sweet and fun. Genuinely quite heartfelt conversations and I'm surprised how like...idk, progressive their chats are? It's sweet.

3 favorite moments in canon: This is actually very tricky to me, I've never really thought about ranking moments. Like, the games are a matter of 'vibing vibing vibing do some substories that give us some fun Kiryu characterisation do some plot I don't understand or particularly care for HOLY SHIT SUDDENLY IT'S REALLY GOOD AND THERE'S SOME GOOD CHARACTER/REALLY FUCKING COOL ACTION SCENES vibing vibing vibing' In no particular order:

The bit where Nishiki fuckin shanks Matsushige. I KNOW his psyche is shattering before our very eyes, I KNOW it's him well and truly crossing the line but like....Goddamn. I cannot have stated multiple times I find it to be his pinnacle of beauty and NOT include it, surely.

The entire Goromi interaction. What starts as a joke quickly just becomes a very heartfelt, honest chat between the two characters, and gives us a very welcome insight into Majima and what she's like when she's not wearing the Mad Dog mask. The cowards should give us a Goromi dating game.

Oh it's GOTTA be Majima's introduction, right? I feel like I can't be a Majima or Yakuza fan and not mention his intro in 0. Just the shot of those iconic shoes, seeing how he handles the whole customer conflict and faces it with such humility and grace and showmanship ALL WHILST HATING IT???? BUT MAINTAINING THAT COMPOSURE AND HAVING FUN FUCKING WITH HIM WHERE HE CAN???? Holy hell. Does the bit where he learns Essence of Blade Biting count tho because that's a favourite for a DIFFERENT reas-. (But also his intro in Kiwami was my actual introduction to him and I fell in love with him then so *shrugs*)

3 favorite headcanons: How to narrow it down to just 3? Hmmm. Actually now I think about it suddenly Every Headcanon I've Heard Has Vanished gvbhnjmbhjn. I'm not very good at making my own or ranking them so uhhhhh. Okay okay:

Trans man Kiryu is canon in my head. Idk man it just feels right.

OH I REMEMBER!! So I don't give a FUCK what canon says, too many people tower over Kiryu for him to be 6 foot. So my actual height headcanons are that Nishiki is 5' 8" (good height) and Kiryu is 5' 10", whereas Majima gets to remain his full 6' 1" glory, however, he slouches a fair amount so people sometimes people forget how fucking tall he is, so when he straightens to his full height people are like oh FUCK. These heights also mean that Nishiki, Who Is Not Short, looks quite small compared to the two men lmao

Sure he's willing to hide in empty trashcans, giant traffic cones and potholes to get the jump on his Kiryu-chan, but Majima actually can't stand being dirty. (1 year of constant torture probably does that to you) He has about 10 different products in his bathroom, a very thorough and regular hair-and-skincare routine. Probably has a floral or citrussy undertone hiding under the smell of smoke, sweat and blood he usually has.

3 least favorite things about it: *sighs*. Okay: 1. Its treatment of female characters. See Exhibit A) Yuko. As we introduce more female characters I fear it'll only get worse. And the thing is, I quite like the women we get!! They just Keep Being The Same!!! Like can I have something beyond Hostess/Bar Employee Who Is Nice To Kiryu and preferably DOESN'T die with little fanfare or just get written out? Makoto probably got out of this the best but even then, not really imo?? She still had her agency taken from her in that last choice. Idk man that's the crux of it ain't it, these women having little agency beyond how to serve the men in the story.

2. I Do Not Care For These Main Plots. By that I mean I am FAR less interested in these bits of political intrigue/conspiracy and plot twists about who works for who because I simply forget who half of these cunts are and I don't actually care. I care about the relationships between the characters, which granted is a more personal taste, but it always feels like....they have something there, and they kinda know it? But not enough to give it the rich and in-depth exploration it deserves because it'd rather throw a twist my way that someone's actually Korean or something about Jingu. (NO SERIOUSLY WHO THE FUCK IS JINGU WHAT WAS HAPPENING IN KIWAMI?!?!?) It leads to Substory Kiryu and Main Story Kiryu being two different men in my head, and I much prefer one over the other

3. Kinda related to the treatment of female characters but like. The softcores. The telephone club minigame. The catfight club. MesuKing. Please stop. They're not sexy, they're not fun, they're just really uncomfortable. It doesn't help that the girl in the background for telephone club game is the fucking same but with a different bikini colour like would it KILL yall to get some body diversity?? Actually if you did that the joke would be she's fat and ugly hahahahaha so funny I loooove this I'm Having Fun Playing the game alongside bae and/or bestie honestly makes it more uncomfy, but watching softcores on my own for the sake of a substory somehow feels sadder. We started fuckin' reviewing them lmaooooo like "Okay THAT'S a pretty tasteful and sexy pose, I'll use that for ref. And now I don't know what she's doing. Please stop looking at me like that" etc etc. Basically anytime the game tries to offer me a 'sexy surprise' or a minigame with tits in it I'm just very uncomfortable. I visited that catfight club ONCE for the uh. Wait which Billionaire was it? GAMBLING KING!! Yeah him and then I never went back because why the hell would I, this is MesuKing But Even Worse. So yeah. Please stop. (I feel like they won't)

That was very long and rambly and probably more in-depth than ya wanted/expected, I'm sure others just write their faves and leave it at that lol. Despite my little experience with the franchise overall and my many issues and criticisms, I do actually quite like this franchise so far. By that I mean my brain has decided to adore Two Characters so I have a feeling I know what games will be my faves overall lol.

HOWEVER I'm actually really looking forward to playing 3 because it's got Mine in it and I've heard it's good, 4 gives us my boy Saejima who I'm excited to learn more about (and Akiyama?? I think?? Idk I'm pretty sure he sings Baka Mitai in 5 aka The Best Version of The Song). 5 introduces us to a Ms Mirei Park and BEFORE YOU ALL START: I'm reeeeally looking forward to making my own judgement because she's SO divisive as a character I cannot help but be fascinated. Ooh same with Yasuko in 4. I think I'm gonna like her, but I might not. Who knows?

And of course from the Entire Hour we played of 7 I already love Ichiban and I think he's gonna be my best friend ever, what a cutie. I'll even sit through turn-based combat for his sake (I KNOW SOME OF YALL LIKE IT AND I'M HAPPY FOR YOU I'VE JUST NEVER BEEN INTO JRPGS THE CLOSEST I'VE GOTTEN WAS POKEMON MOON WHICH I NEVER FINSIHED BUT THAT'S A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME)

Anyway uh. Hope yall enjoyed my ramblings lol

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3065

today was a good day. long and tiring, but good.

i spent the morning at home with my family and was given, among other things, the lego apollo saturn v rocket model. that thing is nearly impossible to find. i'm so excited. and the gifts i got went over very well. chelsea was so excited about the lego set i got her, the one that she had when she was a kid, the original x-wing set, not from the star wars collection, but from the lego SYSTEM collection. yknow the one that's fuckin ancient. the set was from 1999. unopened. some person in japan had one and i bought it for her and she was so excited about it. and james loved his shark.

unfortunately, due to some shipping delays and problems with vendors, a lot of the gifts mom got for me and papa didn't arrive, and some were even refunded, even though she ordered them in october. so i feel kinda bad because i wasn't able to get papa something he wanted that was bigger, like he did for me. i wish i'd been able to find things for him. i'll get him a few things for his birthday, i think, but i still wish my papa had been given more gifts. everyone else got enough today, but papa deserves all the gifts always because he's a good man and he puts up with a lot and he has a lot of things that he has to work with every day that are massive obstacles and he does it without real complaint. my dad is a trooper and a good man and im proud that he's my papa.

after being at home, i went to joel's, where we opened more gifts, among which were a handful of mothman related objects which are adorable and that i love. and the gifts i got for people there also went over well, so that was good too. we spent time sitting and chatting and it was nice. and joel was very happy about the stencils i got him, and i did in fact get him the right kind of spray paint. nice.

after that we went to joel's aunt and uncle's house and had dinner and they gave us gift cards, and around 7 or so we made our way back to the house. we just sat and chilled there. eventually i left and came back home, and i sat down and watched shrek with my mom until she went to bed, and i watched the beginning of shrek 2 for a while before turning the tv off around 10:30 bc i was tired and wanted to go to bed.

but then i got up and started cleaning.

i organized everything of mine in the office and consolidated things and put things away and got rid of all the boxes and put away the wrapping supplies and sorted everything to put it in its proper locations. i cleaned out my bag and i folded my blanket and i pulled the trash out and i did like fifteen thousand things before coming up to bed just before 1am.

and now im here and i need to sleep badly. so i'll do that.

im spending time with kat tomorrow, and im happy that i get to see her.