#my age old interest in vampires is showing isn't it

[writeraid]

wait a damn minute

DOES MOON KNIGHT COUNT AS A FLIPPING VAN HELSING VARIANT???

[andromellax]

About me and this blog

TL;DR:

This is a lesbian NSFW blog. That means it isn't appropriate for children and I feel uncomfortable with interaction from men.

E, they/she, 21 years old, student in Finland, single

a femme lesbian, sub pillow princess, useless lesbian

asks are open for everyone over 18

dm's open for 19 and older, do not message me if you are only interested in sexting and not in getting to know each other, do not come into my dms trying to dom me right away.

Hi! Welcome to the place where I share my lesbian NSFW thoughts and fantasies to get over my shame about being a sexual being. This blog is not appropriate for children. I would also appreciate (non-sapphic) men not interacting with me or my posts as that would make me uncomfortable and a less safe space for me mentally. That being said I do not want to spend my time policing my follower list nor am I anyone's parent here so please evaluate for yourselves weather it is or isn't safe for everyone involved for you to be here.

You can call me E or any pet name that makes you happy :) I'm 21 years old and and I live in Finland. I'm a sub, femme4all, single, and a useless lesbian. My aim with this blog is to explore my slutty side in a safe way.

I'm a university student doing my bachelor's in social sciences. I'm planning to do my master's in gender studies and I'm a passionate feminist. Some of my hobbies are music (I play two instruments and in an amateur orchestra), reading, crochet, and sailing. My favorite tv show is Buffy the Vampire Slayer, my favorite movies are Ratatouille, Spirited away and Call me by your name and my favorite video games are tlou games and No Man's sky on vr. I'm also a big animal lover and certified party girl.

Kinks I'm into: This blog is to help me figure out what I'm into, so I will be updating this post as learn more about myself. Some of my kinks are gentle(ish) coercion, unbalanced positions of power, free use, breeding (no pregnancy), dumbification, degradation and praise (not necessarily at the same time, lol), body worship...

DMs and asks: I definitely welcome interaction, because being slutty alone is boring. My asks are open, so if you have ideas of things I might like, I thinks you might wanna do to me, or just general wonderings or thought you would like to share, please do ;) or just say hi. My DMs are also open and I am open to making connections with people. By that I mean I won't participate in sexting or exchanging nudes without having at least some more pg conversation first. I also am not interested in messaging with people under 19 years old. This is based on my own experiences of peoples maturity and life situations, so even if it might seem arbitrary, but it's simply about what I'm comfortable with.

Some of my hard no's are watersports, scat, age play, incest, spanking

Claimed Anons: 🦖, 🛐

Answered asks can be found under #E answers

[barbwritesstuff]

hi barb! any spare crumbs you can share about that possible witch game? or even just general witch lore in your universe?

do they have covens? when does magic start manifesting? are there lineages? rivalries? familiars? grimoires? any witch related/caused events happening in the background of BM and TT? i am SO curious 👁️👁️

Do they have covens? Some do, some don't. Some like to work alone, some treat witchery very seriously and have very formal meetings, but a lot just chat with other witches on forums or at the local library's bookclub very second Tuesday.

When does magic start manifesting? That can vary hugely. Some people show signs of magic as babies, others might only connect with their magic in old age. Most people figure it out as they stumble through childhood.

Are there lineages? Yes and no. Magic can and does manifest almost randomly in the human population, but it can also run in families. When it does run in families, it most often only shows up every second generation. This is why grandparents usually are the ones teaching magic to their grandkids, not parents.

Rivalries? All humans have rivalries, and witches are, fundamentally, human.

Familiars? Some witches can communicate with animals in varies ways, but other than that, not really. I suppose if a witch really wanted a spooky animal to follow them around they could always befriend a werewolf.

Grimoires? Aka, recipe books for spells. Yes, but they're not typically any different from other recipe books. You can find a bunch of spells online. Reddit spells are infamous for either being either dangerously powerful or complete bogus. There's Youtube videos with 10 views where a witch with a terrible microphone explains step by step how to debug the 'grow plants really fast' spell so it doesn't take over your whole garden.

any witch related/caused events happening in the background of BM and TT? Well... there's the witching wood. It's an incredibly old, powerful tree that has provided advice, magic, and the enchanted sticks that hunters sharpen into vampire killing stakes. In Blood Moon, Ed and MC can accidentally stumble across it during (and may kiss in it). In Thicker Than, MC passed by it in Chapter Four. There's also the wards. Wards can only be made by witches and there's several throughout both stories. Finally, and most obviously I think, Freya's necromancy is how Lawrence Blackwell was able to create the smilers (an army of young enthralled vampires capable of working in daylight hours).

I hope that was interesting. <3

P.S. I just wanted to add, it was very important to me when making the lore of this world (and this goes for werewolves, vampires, and ghosts too) to make paranormal stuff feel realistic but also almost mundane. Eg, minimum wage werewolves, ghosts haunting places for stupid reasons, or no reason at all, witches getting spells from clunky old online forums, hunters who file tax returns, vampires who go through the hospital trash to suck on bloody sponges, or pay local butchers for buckets of blood.

Whenever characters try to be cool, I often take the piss out of them a wee bit.

Eg, whenever a vampire tries to sound epic and intimidating, I try to cut them down to size a wee bit. This isn't a 'cool supernatural' world. It's not epic, it's messy, mundane, and modern. It's my ideas about what a semi realistic supernatural world might be.

[andreal831]

I know you’re not into TVD/TO crossed ships, but like… Jenna and Elijah had something, okay? Maybe it was just Elijah being all charming and lowkey trying to annoy Damon and Alaric, but still—they were kinda cute!!! In a weird, “this probably shouldn’t work but it does” way yk ???

Idk do u have any thoughts on these two ?

I first just want to say that I LOVE Jenna. She will always hold such a special place to me.

I definitely think they were flirting and Elijah was only partly doing it to annoy Alaric and Damon. I mean why wouldn't he be into her? She's incredible. And at least she is more age appropriate than the literal high schoolers.

I think they could have been something temporary in a completely different world. One where Elijah wasn't the super morally corrupt person we see in TVDU. Maybe an amnesia Elijah and Jenna could have something. She's similar to women we see him interested in throughout the show. She's intelligent, family-oriented, badass, and sarcastic.

The issue we might run into is how morally questionable Elijah is. My initial instinct was to say Jenna has a clear, black and white moral view of the world. She is one of the few people that finds it strange that "24 year old" Damon is hanging around teenagers. But she also says some questionable things, especially about her party days that make me believe she understands the world is a little more complicated. Maybe if she had been given more time in the supernatural world, we could have seen a more of her complex morality. We know she would do anything for her family. She sacrifices herself for Elena without hesitating, even willing to kill the witch, Greta, in order to save her niece.

I've talked about it the other day, but Elijah tends to need people around him that can live in the grey. People who understand the meaning of doing anything for family, even if it seems horrible. Because at the end of the day, he's never going to be "fixed" of that. We see bits of that in Jenna near the end.

So then we run into my normal problem with TVD/TO cross over. She is willing to do anything for her family and he is willing to do anything for his family. Families which often find themselves on opposing teams. In a world where Klaus is killed, Elena would be to. I don't see Jenna hooking up with the man who had a hand in that. In a world where Jenna wasn't used as the vampire, Klaus survives, Elena survives, Elijah is firmly on Klaus' side who still wants to use Jenna's niece as a blood bag. Again, she would not cross that line.

I also don't think their desires would line up super well. We don't really know what Jenna wants out of her life. Her life was put on hold when she took over caring for her niece and nephew, but I always got the impression she didn't want that. I assumed she wanted to go live her life, party a bit more, finish college, not settle down with kids and a husband. Even Elijah without his memories isn't exactly a partier. He loves that lowkey, quiet life style. I could see them running into each other if they had never come in contact, having a brief, fun fling. But it wouldn't lead to much more.

But I'll always enjoy their flirty banter! I definitely agree with the "it probably shouldn't work but it does." Like not long term, but I can see something there.

Thanks for the ask! <3

[child-of-the-nights]

Can u write sweet headcanons for Felix Volturi? Pretty please 🥰

Ask and you shall receive!

A/N: It's tragic that my boy Felix got so little screen time. Anyway, the mate can be either human or vampire in this one. Have fun!

TW: none

Felix Volturi Sweet Headcanons

Felix is taller than the majority of people, thus it's safe to assume that he will also be taller than his mate. Having said that, I can absolutely see him comparing hand sizes with his partner as a sweet gesture.

Now, if his partner is taller than he is, he is genuinely impressed. They now hold the title of being the palazzo's tallest pair. Congratulations to them, I suppose.

On a more serious note, I believe Felix is intrigued by modern forms of entertainment. He's just fascinated about everything, whether it be watching a movie or listening to a podcast. Given his… past, he is appreciative that people have discovered other ways to enjoy gory fights without endangering the lives of actual people (ironic given that he's a vampire)

So he loves to sit with his mate to watch a favorite movie of theirs, maybe listen to their favorite podcast.

Given his old age, Felix is also highly versed in literature and a few languages. Although he would never hold himself to the same standard as his masters, he is quite educated. What I mean is that he is willing to assist his love in learning them.

CUDDLES. That's it. He loves to cuddle with his mate.

I believe that vampires get tired (mentally not physically) as well (despite what SM says) and they need to "recharge". That is why Felix enjoys wrapping his arms around his partner and burying his face in their neck. For him, that is recharging.

My favorite headcanon is that he is an extremely tender lover. His mate got scared of something? He soothes them by whispering sweet nothings into their ears. Felix also kisses their hands and palms if they worked hard that day. He essentially tries to be as delicate as possible. He behaves in this way whether his lover is human or a vampire.

Felix spends every spare moment with his beloved because, like Demetri, he is also frequently busy. When he is not with them, Felix enjoys discussing their mate with his friends (mostly Demetri). He enjoys praising them and sharing their accomplishments with others.

While staying respectful to his fellow guards, Felix occasionally amuses his s/o by gossiping. NOT about serious stuff that will damage their reputation; he just gossips about little things. (Usually with Demetri by his side). He also gossips about some of the executed vampires if his beloved is interested. (once again, not sharing private info, just silly things)

That being said, his mate can expect to befriend Demetri because they're kind of a package deal. They date one and befriend the other.

Felix is the kind of vampire man who enjoys hearing his partner talk about their interests. He enjoys hearing his lover's enthusiasm for a certain form of media, even if he personally isn't interested in it. So yes, he would listen to his mate explain the plot of their favorite show.

I imagine Felix would use old-fashioned nicknames or call his significant other by their name when referring to them. He might give his partner a nickname in their native tongue if they are from another country.

[krissiefox]

Castlevania (TV Series) (Review)

"An anime I actually like?! Holy shit!" Yup, for the first time in ages, I've been able to watch an anime that isn't going out of it's way to creep on women or punch down at queer people!

If you're familiar with the series of spooky action adventure games, you will know that Castlevania revolves around a world where vampire hunters hunt Dracula and his army of monsters. In this series, that does take place, but they also wonderfully flesh out all of the characters, with lots of cool interweaving stories!

I have tried to make this review very light on spoilers, so I will only discuss plot points for the first few episodes or so). The rest of the review is below the divider.

We start off following the story of Trevor Belmont, a jaded and shunned vampire hunter who is too tired to be polite, but still kind enough to save those in need of rescuing. He is hanging around a city that has been attacked by Night Creatures (Dracula's monsters) and eventually meets a group of people called the Speakers. He rescues one of the members children, a Speaker magician named Sypha! Sypha eventually befriends Trevor and they go looking for Dracula's son, Alucard. After a a fight, Alucard ends up teaming up with our heroes as well.

So, why did the Night Creatures attack the city? Well, it turns out, that Dracula in this series has been given a lot more complexity than in the games, making him a more interesting character. Dracula is a very old vampire who is in love with a scientist and doctor named Lisa. The two seem very happy together and even had a son, Alucard. Sadly, thanks to the bigotry and hatred of the christian church, Lisa is murdered for "witchcraft" when her home is found to be full of scientific studies and machines. Dracula is broken by this, and goes from a quiet man wanting to be left alone to wanting to exterminate the entire human race for murdering his wife.

Dracula recruits many other vampires to aid in his cause, as well as two humans who agree to do his bidding. Eventually our three heroes make it into the castle for a final showdown with Dracula, but I think that's as far as I will tell the story, so as to not spoil all the twists and surprises the series has in store.

The show is masterfully made with a great soundtrack, beautiful background art, lovable - and often very sympathetic - characters, awesome fight scenes, and more! It also seamlessly blends humor, suspense and horror. Additionally, it doesn't pull any punches with gore or profanity, making many of the actions scenes quite brutal! I find most anime very difficult to enjoy, but this show sets a very high standard or how good anime can actually be!

The show is available on Netflix, but thankfully also on DVD - you can find physical copies of it on ebay. I will of course recommend getting it in that format, as streaming services are unreliable and generally a waste of money in my opinion. If you love spooky and exciting adventures, give the show a look!

More screenshots below :)

[p0rk-guts]

waitt but what's different about your ocified velvette... i like her a little but find myself wanting more substance from her in canon tbh

TEEHEE WHAT A GOOD QUESTION I TOTALLY DIDN'T SET PPL UP TO ASK ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay sew me and @ajistorpid were talking and they inspired a good chunk of my ideas so you can blame them for feeding my sick delusions.

Read more just like last time bc I talk too much sorry but there's art in there too oooo you should look u should read my ramblings

As far as I know, Velvette has no canon age at death, cause of death, or death date so based on what we know we just crafted our own headcanons. AJ proposed she might've had parents who ran one of those family vlog channels with her as the face of it, becoming a child influencer under her parents' control. I was thinking she could've been a child model- yk like. dance moms or something. Idk I don't remember what was happening on that show— anyways. Yea

Either way she grew up constantly controled and perfection was her standard. All of her outside thoughts and feelings and interests and opinions were constantly dismissed in favor of what made her more marketable. She never did get that popular in life tho, and her mentors always shamed and blamed her for it.

Idk if this is canon or not, but the idea of the sinners designs reflecting their vices or things they regreted or hated in life is an untapped gold mine to me so that could explain where Velvette's supposed doll and clown themes come from. Became a toy dressed up and paraded around for the entertainment of others + joke never taken seriously. She'd hate that

(As for how that ties into my redesign…. me and AJ were thinking she could be a vampire doll, but I'm not sure IDK I wanna sketch that out and see what it's giving)

In hell she easilly fell back into this warped facsimile of her old life bc it was all she knew. "she feels some form of pseudo control and enjoyment because she has no one pulling her strings now" (<-AJ) SHE'S running things!!! Who's the puppet now!!!!!!

Then THAT had me thinking too because now that I think about it. Why Is she the backbone of the V's?? She's like. An undergrad student in my mind at the MOST and Vox and Val are two men pushing 40 I'm sure. I think a big part of it is the fact that those two are almost complete and utter buffoons who let their emotions cloud their actions constantly, Valentino most obviously but even tho Vox seems more composed like when he's talking Val down from his outburst and when he was talking to the press, we can still see he's a total mess—especially where Alastor is concerned. He lost it so bad during their duet HE SHORTED PENTAGRAM CITY'S POWER.

Now out of all the V's we've seen the least of Velvette (I'd call it what it is but yall gon get real mad at me), The most we really got out of her character was the overlord meeting (and despite her huge ego and unruly behavior she did end up speaking facts), so maybe she Is just as unstable as them in canon but canon is SHIT and this isn't about canon anymore. In my mind she's very much in charge of the back end of their work. Vox is obviously the head of the operation—or at least he seems like it to me—what with the tech company having his name and with him answering the interviews, but I think that's all he is. The figure head. Velvette is the brain behind it all. When Vox proposes new buisness endeavors off the cuff she's the one who goes back and makes sure they're getting handled properly because he doesn't really dig into the backend of how things happen. Vox goes to most of the conferences or whatever (Vel's too busy running her shows and serving cunt after all) but Vel follows up on what was learned.

(also yeah all that makes this very much an au of an au bc it'd take a lot of radical changes for the two of them to be friends I think. It's fun to imagine anyway)

Quoting AJ here bc I'm bad at paraphrasing and they said it well:

"And if we're going to make her sympathetic, (obviously not excusing her enabling a rapist) Val and Vox are grown ass men and she never got to experience the world outside a camera

Velvette is easily malleable with no real relationships!! Some victims tend to gravitate towards people who are similar to their abusers the only exception is that she feels like she has control this time"

THIS this. THIS! Okay uhh vague personal experience w/ abuse cw ig. skip this paragraph if you don't wanna hear it. But It kinda reminds me of my relationship with my parents- NOT THAT I SEE THEM AS TWO DADS AND A DAUGHTER I DO NOT BELIEVE IN THAT NOTION IN A POST PILOT WORLD If future content proves me wrong it proves me wrong but at this moment they're all equals in my mind (…and I hc them as poly BUT WE'LL GET THERE) but In my situation it's like. I hate my parents for the abuse they've caused me, my mom more than my dad bc she's satan incarnate, but there are still things I like about my dad and. Tolerate. About my mother. We still can talk cordialy and spend time together, have fun together even, and I show affection to them, but deep down I know I wanna cut my mom off later and maybe my dad too depending. Additionally my mom is completely Incompatent and pulls none of her weight so despite it all I've been forced to pick up the slack and become half the brains of this family. I do chores she should take care of. Handle money. Make important decisions about our health and safety she doesn't care about.

AAAny ways. This is so my version of Velvette. No I'm not projecting (I am). She pulls a big chunk of the weight around there (some of it being carried by Vox and virtually none by Val). She's very close with the two of them but isn't a fan of everything they do (Cares more for Vox than Val in my mind). Speaking of, she definitely isn't some saint now, she still makes the love potions and is Impassive to both Val and Vox's behavior, but part of that Is her just seeing it as part of the business. Shady practices and exploitation are par for the course in any business to her. She never truly grew out of the harmful mindsets ingrained into her by whoever her enabling caretakers were in life and they're still apparent in hell. (Maybe she even experienced some of the darker sides of exploitation in life but was groomed into thinking it was okay contributing to why she doesn't see Valentino's actions as heinous. Idk. thinking on it)

Circling back to my poly V's idea. Idk it just seems plausible to me. Vox and Val already have their whole thing going on, they all live together, and they all have nicknames for each other (Vox calling her my dear, Val calling her baby doll, Vel calling Vox darling). Ik that could just be their personalities and the pet names don't have to mean anything more but this is MY au and my word is gospel hope this helps. It just makes sense

I could go on and ON about the toxic insanity of the Poly V's in my mind— particularly between Vox and Valentino— but this is NOT their post so maybe next time. As for Velvette, I get the vibe that she'd be intimate with both of them and enjoy it but she's never the one to initiate anything. Sometimes they're all like this 🤞🏾 and others the boys are a complete turn off to her (main example being the difference in her attitude towards Vox in episode 3 vs episode 8). Her tolerance of them flips on a dime depending on how they're acting. She also prefers to be a casually entertained observer to VoxVal more often then not (ex. end of episode 8 imo)

Boys aside. My Velvette is still a social media influencer and she's all about advertising. advertising products (like the love potion), clothing looks, technology... Heck even herself. "You're nobody if you don't wear this or use this or look like this ^ - ^". Projecting on her even further by making her have a love/hate relationship with her profession aka the modeling aspect of it: she's always had a genuine love for fashion and dressing up but the internal pressure for perfection she's placed on herself makes it hard for her. She's very hard on her models and designers bc of this

Couldn't think of a segway for this but also WHAT HAPPENED TO VELVETTE WANTING TO FIGHT THE ANGELS??? The "full assault plan" against the angels??? And then when the fight actually came they were all just lounging around watching it go down like it was afternoon tv????? This isn't even a "we'll get to it in season 2" thing did they honest to god forget? Did that line not mean anything??

Well I didn't forget and it's pissed me off since my first rewatch of that meeting scene. Don't think we don't know how the V's got the angel head, but In my head Velvette was the one who initially proposed the idea for an assault against heaven and her insatiable need to feel respected and feared only spurred this plan on, incredible risk be damned.

It also felt weird to me that Velvette just. Let it go when Carmilla said the meeting was over. Just. "Oh ok! Plan cancelled no more attacking heaven ^ - ^ I'm gonna go scroll for the rest of the show!" Hu h. My au-ified Velvette would definitely fight her on it— if she thought killing angels would change the game and Carmilla held the secrets behind it she would pry! Blow up at her about it until she wasn't getting results and bitterly storming off with as much composure as she could muster. Not wanting to team up with Carmilla but find some way to use her for all she was worth and get her way in the end, use the power and resources the V's had to actually make a plan. Would it have worked without the Morningstars? Eh. Either way I'm sure she could delude herself into thinking they were the most powerful people in hell. Ugh I don't wanna make an au rewrite of the show and I that was never my plan so idk where that'd go but. Yea

ANYWAYS anyways. wow you made it to the end somehow! Here's your treat :3

Context u didn't ask for: Some days Velvette overwhelms herself with her own impossible expectations. Nothing she creates or puts out is good enough. She gets extra anxious about her following; nothing's happened to them, but what if they see the miniscule flaw in her latest clothing that she sees? What if she's no longer perfect? (Even worse in the vamp Velvette redesign of her bc she literally feeds off their attention and admiration)

She'll snap at everyone and disapprove of every look and then hole herself away somewhere where she crashes and is just. So. Tired. But she'll be out of it the next day, ready to keep the conveyor rolling.

[ca-suffit]

I have a kind of dumb disorganized question. Do you think we’ll revisit the reasoning for the San Francisco memory alteration in season 3? I might be just missing something but I don’t think there’s actually an established reason for Armand altering Louis memory? I tend to think we’re all in alignment that Armand made the edit for both Louis and Daniel, (again showcasing how the power dynamics in Loumand are kind of deceptive - Armand is just much more powerful than Louis both socially in the world and as a vampire) but I’m just not sure what the reasoning is?

I saw a kind of interesting post out in the wild proposing that Louis actually did ask Armand to alter that memory and while I think that’s interesting in the abstract, I can’t divorce the race/power dynamics angles that would call into question (delegitimizating what Louis has been through). Which brings me back to, for a number of reasons I do think the intended read is Armand erased the memory from Louis’ mind without his knowledge. But I’m back to the question of why? It kind of seems like Loumand is in the same spot before and after the mind wipe to me, is there another layer here I missed?

I think we'll learn more about it somewhere in the show as it progresses, yes, cuz it's too big of a mystery to leave unanswered.

this is sort of an aside before I get into it, but I keep thinking of the extent of these powers. we don't know a lot about it still. armand seems aware that recollection is possible, bcuz he's not ttly surprised when he sees that daniel and louis have remembered stuff. so I think it's interesting why he chose that moment and not others and I'm still piecing together thoughts about it as a whole.

anyway tho. this is potentially a headcanon as my answer, so remember that bcuz I'm def not trying to say this is "the" answer. I have no idea fr.

armand's "explanation" in 2x6 could be a whole post itself but that's sort of ot so I'm just going with what the "truth" was otherwise for so long. let's look at the phrasing of it.

armand doesn't forget that louis thought daniel was "fascinating." he also didn't forget what louis said it meant for their relationship that he stay alive. if we consider that armand has awareness that memories might partially or fully return, placing himself as responsible for seeing the "fascinating" qualities in daniel first and "saving" him from louis makes him look better than what rly happened. without the actual audio from that time period, neither of them prbly would have remembered the rly "bad" parts. I'm gonna guess armand knows this too as he's shown unwinding tapes (I know they're not *the* tapes but still, the visual is there for a reason....alongside editing claudia's diaries too) and obviously this part of the interview was *not* kept to the og version anyone had access to that he was aware of.

assad said in an interview (sry I forget which one rn) that armand is thrown off when he speaks to louis about turning madeleine. when louis kisses him and then walks away, like he could walk away at any moment from the whole relationship and be fine without it. armand in the show says he'd be "nothing" without louis. I'm not sure when it starts exactly but there is a point where armand puts himself in the position of always knowing what's "best" for louis. it's a subtle manipulation and not what louis was used to from lestat. it gives the illusion of being cared for by someone who loves u instead of being controlled. armand knows that louis thinks he's boring so he has to do something to create a world where he isn't....or at least where louis thinks highly of him for *something.*

I always saw a lot of daniel paralleling jonah in this. both of them live to old age even tho their existence is painful to some of the most powerful vampires who could have killed them in a second. killing either of them would drive the wedge between them (lestat and armand) and louis even further tho, and they both know that. it also won't fix the issue. ya ok so jonah *did* have more of a history with louis before that moment than daniel did but it's still the same thing of "why do u feel this for someone else and not me? what is wrong with *me* that we don't have this?" especially cuz both points of interest are humans compared to vampire partners. lestat prbly kept tabs on jonah his whole life too.

so that's as much as I've had thoughts on this anyway. idk if it helps.

oh also ia and I don't think louis would ask to erase anything either. this is a man who keeps pebbles in his ankles to remember claudia's death. louis is so full of catholic guilt that there's no way that man would ask to forget *anything* that hurts him.

[poet-to-none]

I find myself feeling I should look over what's personally passed, as a creative person. A reflection of what's ended, if you will. A question of where am I today.

My reflection begins in the season of autumn, in the months that carry many memories of negative changes in my life. As a sign that thrives on change, and a future oriented personality type, I usually harvest the potential of it, going through these times standing on my feet and in the direction I intend to go.

I'll give you an example of some of these fun and fantastic autumns I've had though. They've included sudden loss of my childhood friends, loss of a parent and sibling, loss of a 10 year friendship I'd have kept for life. So on this particular autumn, loss of twitter, bought and sold and destined to fall apart, can sit among them as hardly a stress, in comparison. But anyway, at this time it's happening, the writing's on the wall for me to leave, and I'm resisting it.

I'm flirting, in fact, with switching fandoms, moving my attention from Hannibal to the Vampire Chronicles. At this time, there's two choices, two pots boiling with activity. . . it's more or less, try the books or the show. Choose to experience one or the other. I choose to pick up a book. I go on a journey. It's a halloween kind of mood. It's a great idea.

Luckily I have a long suffering friend I can crack jokes to as I read, just show up unanounced in their DMs to ramble, and the experience of reading IWTV/TVL/QOTD is unbelievably wild. Entertaining- yes, weird-yes, but it's psychologically and intellectually enriching.

I finish in time to join my watchmates, as the show episodes begin to release weekly. Unlike reading the books, the show itself lends toward triggering my traumas and its flair/talented co-stars can't make up for unappealing writing choices. It doesn't even take place in the correct century, which is a big deal if your genre is vampire story. Like, if they're not born when they're written to be born, isn't that stopping the whole character worldview from forming? I think so at least. The author of the novels I just read had a personal library of historical research materials, and period writing supportive hobbies, and whatever these script writers have in comparison feels like a yawn and a hope to fake it until they make it. But who knows if that impression is true. Not worth my time to know.

I stop at episode 5, I tell my watchmates my will to go on has given out. So I return to resisting leaving twitter, as is my right, and I begin to see the start of a show fandom. It's an interesting event in itself, for an extroverted feeling type. Multitudes of people with intense feelings beginning to interact and get creative. It's the emotional euphoria equivalent to a fountain of drugs, out there for free. I have seen OFMD rise into being. Or do I say I have felt it? Anyway. Show fans exist now.

Funnily enough, Armand/Old Daniel shippers exist now. The show, despite physically aging Daniel to 69-70ish, separating his narrative from Armand, having Louis declare the true love of his life to be Armand, actually lost the battle of preventing it. If that was their aim?

I'm beyond amused. I'm giddy. I convince myself to approach watching episodes 6-7, skipping most of the Lestat/Louis/Claudia scenes. I discover I love this one bit of the show, it doesn't have a teenager, it doesn't have domestic abuse and sexual vilolence, it's not triggering. I toss caution to the wind, I sketch and paint Old Daniel and Armand getting nasty with each other. I scatter my likes to the wind on thirst posts. I read some fics. I have a good time. But it does not fill the far deeper need of a new chapter in my fandom life.

I begin to think seriously about that. There's still the books fandom. What about the books do I love most? The Vampire Lestat, obviously. What about the Vampire Lestat do I love most? Well. The anticipation of who would make Lestat a vampire. And holy shit, his turning really fucking delivered, not at all in the way I expected. But frustratingly, the vampire who sires him, anticipated and enjoyed, is also a narrative trojan horse. He stops existing after he gets Lestat through the gates. As a concept, he slips through my fingers like his ashes through Lestat's, all his mysteries unaddressed. I think surely the book fandom must have built story after story about this vampire. I find a wiki page, with what I already know, not even a mention of his ghost era in later books. I find 10 or 20 results tagged on ao3, he's only a name mention in these fics. I don't even find fanart of him. Well. Damn.

"His name was Magnus" starts to live in my mind. So does the desire for a new chapter. What if I did the most unprecidented thing I am capable of doing in this moment? Not art, though that would be nice, maybe I will. What if I write Magnus first fic? What if I give myself fully to discovering what this character would be, from his own eyes? What if I make it for me to read?

Awfully bad idea, my intuition responds. Read the room. Know what you're committing to if you do this.

But yet. I'm not afraid. I do it. I commit. November I research. December I write. January, I'm a whole new person. A person without much of a vision or expectations, I'll admit. But it's enough I did a creative work for myself.

That's when I meet someone. They want to engage with what I have done and they do. It's a moment that steals my heart, honestly. I'm emotional about it!!! They read the fic. They talk to me about the fic. They support the art I'm only just starting to make. They open the door to mingle with book+show fans, folks trying their best to balance on the chasm. And I take their hand, because isn't that everything I could have wanted, and it could happen. The outsider, with his weird special interest, could have friends. I could start a counter-culture. I could find others like us. I'll be an apologist. I'll produce ideas, conversations, more art and writing, I'll rise to this occasion.

It's just. . .a harder task than I expect, to keep this vision going very long. I don't have endless energy or luck. The book+show fans are tolerant, supportive at times, but not often collaborating with me or producing anything alongside me. I get less and less one on one time with the person who steers the vision with me. I find a handful of fans for Magnus, who have an interpersonal conflict as soon as I test the waters of joining them in a small private group. If they have any writing or art planned, it all freezes up now. I try then to just process how that makes me feel. In the stumbling times after, that wonderful person I met in January decides to leave my life. It hurts letting go. Gossip about me is everywhere, suffocating my intuitive empathy. Hatred for Magnus is always at toxic levels. I'm starting to see the future might entail being the loner I'd thought I would be at the beginning. I close up the connections that have gone silent. I keep the ones that haven't. My own art and writing needs air on its coals and more firewood, or it's at an end here, it's going so slowly. I rewatch Hannibal. I think about if I should return to the fandom. I don't know.

That autumn to spring, everyone I know, online or offline, is in a storm of real life crisis, even my own family. We're hurting and keep hurting. I give literally every ounce of my support and love, in some way, to each person. It's not until summer, that some of that turns toward the positive.

I've nearly reached a point then my writing and drawing will be in limbo forever. I still devote time to it. I still am in the process of reading more of the series, the end books, the Prince Lestat ones.

That's when Sam Reid speaks about my work, on a podcast. It's unbelievable to me. It raises so many questions. It presents so many opportunities. I'm reeling, because this upends everything in how rare it is. Nothing about my fandom pariah status will suddenly melt away, for the book or show fandoms, but I want to DO SOMETHING after that. To come alive. To succeed. On the other hand, inertia and depression have their grip on the situation as well.

I fail to restart writing. But I draw so much. In my social life, in my personal life, I rest my mind and body. There's finally no more conflicts. It's a very stable time. More than enough to refuel. I dabble in the Arcane fandom and happily take up Harkula. I test the water on bluesky. I decide I am definitely not getting involved again in the show fandom or show+books fandom. But I am open to the books only fandom. All this way, and always, I still have some loyal friends and Magnus fans, and you know who you guys are. You are the best. Thank you.

I finally asked for closure, directly, on why that person left my life, and while they gave no answer back, I do feel it is done. I have moved on.

I think it's time for a new vision, if there can be one. The question is, how do I look inward and know what it is. And where does it happen. Tumblr's not looking so strong on it's functioning future at this moment.

image source: https://www.tumblr.com/weirdpngs/732474871711399936?source=share

[scumashling]

Welcome newcomers! You can call me Ash (they/she).

About this account

•i made this account after realizing I've been into whump for years without knowing it and discovering that I'm not alone in finding comfort in fiction about characters being put through emotional and or physical hell. I've often struggled with intense shame related to my interest in whump, especially as it's tied to my own trauma, so learning about this community has felt like a huge weight off my chest.

Fan Of: defiant whumpee, intimate whumper, female whump, living weapon, non con body modification, drugged Whumpee, revenge whump, dehumanization, fantasy whump, Bastard whumpee, religious whump, Whumpee turned Whumper, Bad Caretaker and nsfwhump

Squicked by: severe infantilization, by extension a lot of pet whump, mpreg, Taken style kidnapped and trafficking whump

Triggers: most of my triggers in fiction are circumstantial but let it be known: if you post qanon conspiracy shit about trafficking I will immediately block you.

•I'm fairly new to tumblr and am still trying to get a feel for how things work around here, both in terms of the people and the site itself, so I apologize in advance for any possible future faux pas. I'm also a novice writer and still building my confidence in it, but I do I intend to post some of my own fiction, art, and memes.

•I'm in too many fandoms to count but currently you can expect stuff related to Chainsaw Man, Berserk, Slay the Princess, The Boys, and Delicious in Dungeon

•DNIs: I don't intend for this to be an overtly political account, and i'm not into policing people's behavior so giving a list of opinions/positions I find morally objectionable and demanding you keep away from my account if you hold them isn't my style. If I think something you posted is wack then I will simply unfollow or block you, because I am an adult who knows and enforces their own boundaries. That being said, I am a leftist (socially, economically, foreign policy wise) and related themes are more then likely to show up in my fiction, so if you have a problem with that my account probably isn't for you. The one exception to the DNI is Zionists (including "progressive" two staters) in which case, fuck Israel, fuck genocide, fuck you for supporting it, you're a N@zi, Long Live a Free Palestine 🇵🇸

•WARNING: there will be non con stuff posted on this account, as well as general content related to abuse, kink, trauma and addiction, as well as the occasional gore post. I will use appropriate tags/cws but if that is not something you can handle, or just not something you're into hearing about, please take care of yourself and disengage. I use fiction to cope with my own history and truly do not want anyone else to be harmed by it

•I do not consider myself pro or anti and as far as I'm concerned yall both have some weird people on your side. Basically as long as you aren't being creepy or harassing anyone, have common sense around media literacy/ engaging with fiction as fiction, but don't use the fact that it's fiction to avoid thinking about real world implications/themes, you are welcome on my page.

some facts about me:

•im a nonbinary femme lesbian who's currently studying fine arts.

•I'm mixed (Asian and white)

•I'm a 23 years old

•I was diagnosed with autism at age 18. Some of my special interests include manga, horror, feminist theory, animation, media analysis, mycology, vampires and cooking.

•i adore poetry, my favorites are Lady Lazarus by Sylvia Plath, Ozymandias by Percy Shelley, and She Had Some Horses by Joy Harjo (specifically the canto Drowning Horses)

•I have been drawing for 7 years

[knightotoc]

Just finished IWTV book, so now I can say the differences between the book, movie, and show. The movie is quite accurate to the book, while the show is more original. I love them all quite a lot, but I think the show is my favorite since it's the most romantic. Long post with spoilers below the cut.

book:

The depth of Louis' interiority, especially his thoughts about religion, can only be found in the book. I am also ex-Catholic so this is high-key my shit. Especially knowing Anne Rice went back and forth later in life. I can relate. Louis wants to talk about his feelings with other vampires, but Lestat and Claudia aren't interested, which is the main reason Louis is attracted to Armand. Where is the Brideshead Revisited crossover?? Louis get in a bisexual love triangle with the Flytes for me🙏

I learned in the Matt Baume video on Anne Rice that she wrote IWTV while grieving her daughter, who died of leukemia just before her sixth birthday. This feeling of grief, reflected so clearly in Claudia, is the most moving and unique aspect of the book, far more than anything between the adult characters.

One reason this feeling is watered-down in both adaptations is that in the book, Claudia is only 5/6, the age of Anne's real daughter. In the movie she is 10 and in the show 14. Of course it would be impossible to find a 6 year old actress who could act with the maturity of an 80-year-old woman. But the character is even more pitiful and bizarre as a little child than as one nearing puberty.

In the book, Lestat is shown to have survived the murder attempt pretty early on, and he keeps jump-scaring Louis and Claudia on their adventures. I prefer the movie's version where they hold off on this reveal. Though of course I always love to see him, lol

In the book, I got the impression that Lestat and Louis are both bi, but Lestat prefers men and Louis prefers women. Still, their motivations aren't driven by sexuality in a straightforward way. For example, Lestat's ideal prey is a young man, because he loves to destroy their potential. Louis feels something like love for a few women characters, because he feels empathy for their misfortunes.

The adaptations soften/change Louis' status as a slave-owner; in the movie, he frees his slaves, and in the book he just flees. As much as Louis is a soft-hearted quasi-feminist, defined by his guilt and regret, he is still racist and close-minded in most ways. This seems realistic to me.

I did think it was interesting and cool that the enslaved people can tell Louis and Lestat aren't human, while the other plantation owners and even Lestat's dad have no idea. But we don't get their perspective, just Louis' racist assumptions.

Yeah in the book Lestat has a dad! It is rather confusing since Lestat explains nothing, but it creates some great melodrama. I guess I have to read the next one and hope for a backstory reveal.

Fun spooky detour into Eastern Europe! I hope the show goes there in season 2.

Louis and Armand's discussions are really cool. I especially loved Louis' monologues after Claudia's death. There wasn't room for these discussions in the movie, but I feel like it'll be a main focus in season 2 of the show.

movie:

Like I said, the movie is impressively accurate, and a beautiful work of art on its own. The best innovation is holding off on the Lestat reveal until almost the very end. This makes it look like their murder attempt really did a number on him, and it took decades and decades of rat-eating to even drag himself out of the swamp. I like that.

The movie also has a more exciting and ridiculous ending, in which Lestat attacks the reporter in his car and drives away to Guns N' Roses. The book ends with the reporter hurrying off to find Lestat himself. It's funnier and more awesome if Lestat is the one driving the plot and the car. Pleased to meet you :D

"How avant-garde." Best line in the movie, and it's not from the book!

Since the movie cut out most of the minor characters, there isn't as much evidence for Louis' bisexuality. Louis seems more like, gay but closeted. And Lestat seems more like, gay but misogynist, so he'll prey on women just for sport lol.

I'm a Fight Club guy so I love that this is, like, a reverse companion movie (this time, Brad Pitt is the pushover in a dangerous gay duo)

show:

This is the only version that is clearly gay. But this dynamic is the same: Louis wants to talk about things, and Lestat does not. In this case, the focus of these discussions is not vampirism or religion but their relationship. Louis points out that he is gay and Lestat is bi. Perhaps it's just because I saw this version first, but this is my favorite version of their sexualities. The show simply spends more time with this dynamic, and how it affects everything, including their interracial relationship and openness in society.

In the book, Lestat is a talented but soulless musician. He can play anything, but without heart. In the show, music is Lestat's one genuine connection to humanity (even if this connection just leads him to kill musicians who don't impress him). I believe later books go more into Lestat as a musician, so I'll have more thoughts on this later.

Since the reporter is cynical, old, and dying, this creates a much more compelling conversation within the framing device. He holds Louis to task with a forcefulness that rivals Lestat. It is a clever way of modernizing the story, since Daniel references their last interview in the 70s (when the book was published), and you are meant to wonder which version is more truthful.

Since Claudia is 14, she can pass as an adult, and she is able to go on her own rather disastrous adventure. It is exciting, terrifying, and sad, and a welcome addition for this character, though it is much different than the book's helpless, heartless Claudia.

The Catholicism in the show is flashier, but not as interesting as the book. For example, in the book, Louis is haunted not just by Paul's death, but Louis' failure to meet Paul's faith-driven monetary demands. In the show, Paul's ideas seem like more of an annoyance. Maybe there will be more religious doubt in season 2, but I don't really expect it.

In the book, it seems like Louis and Claudia throw Lestat in the swamp since it's faster and more thorough than fire. In the show, the oven they use is a major plot point, and Louis can't bear to put Lestat's body in it because he still loves him. Instead they throw Lestat in the trash, which is one of my favorite tropes (see: Maul in The Clone Wars, Soldier 1998). This is just one of the many ways the show complicates and deepens Louis and Lestat's bond.

I feel like the show is more believable and has more deepness in general, since it's a smart retrospective on an old franchise and a response to decades of vampire fun in pop culture. For example, in the show Louis has volunteer humans to feast upon, and it's very "safe, sane, and consensual," versus the universally predatory relationships in the book and movie. Because we all know now that if vampires were real, and they were hot and rich, they could get all the blood they want without hurting anyone. An ethical vampire like Louis isn't impossible anymore. Compared to other billionaires, he's a pretty decent guy.

So, I'd say the book has the most profound perspective on grief, the movie has better structure, and the show has the most complex romance.

[nono-uwu]

Ons chapter 135 thoughts!!

Spoilers duh (also very long post. Lmk if I should add the read more cut)

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- KAGAMI I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD IT IN YOU TO GIVE CHESS AND HORN MORE SCREENTIME BUT THANK YOU ANYWAYS

- I am so glad that the whole digestion thing is more symbolical bc... that inital wording really threw me off lmao

- on that note, the immagery of the dead trees with the bodies sticking out of 'em... very creepy and on point, I think it's neat

- they actually adressed Crowley forgetting them! Wowzers (side note she looks hella adorable. My little skrunkly)

- ouugh the dynamic... where was it earlier? It seems so much more casual than during the Nagoya arc (probably just wishful thinking on my part lmao)... idc how give us more of this

- "you two were my first servants", LORE CRUMBS! I guess.

- wait so, they're still becoming demons? But isn't that a form of reincarnation, the thing Ferid is specifically trying to stop? But he's also devouring them... to absorb their power I guess? Since later on Ferid mentions now being more powerful after devouring Crowley (I'll get to that asspull later)

- Also Horn looks a teensy bit weird with the new artstyle but she's still super pretty 🫶 be my wife pls

- So, 16 year old Ferid is inside himself as his 'true self'? I assume that because he got the idea to stop reincarnation when he was 16 and hasn't changed his mind since (never let 16 year olds make big decisions in this world, it only leads to disaster)

- the skrunkle part 2. Also I doubt being digested like that feels good in any way. And with how slow it's supposed to be, yikes.

- I have a theory (aka major amounts of copium): Yuu will bust in and save Crowley because of 'fAmiLy' and also save Chess and Horn since they're family by association

- No one can reach Ferid, eh? And then Corwley's voice reaches him. Kagami and his queerbaiting amirite

- However Ferid then snags Crowley and ig he's on the priority list of getting devoured. Probably bc he's the strongest vampire Ferid has eaten. Cannibalism as a metaphor for love and devotion or whatever, except it's very literal and I doubt there's any love beyond 'u and interesting critter dude' from both sides

- Ok here's my major nitpick with this chapter: KAGAMI STOP BREAKING AND BENDING YOUR OWN FUCKING WORLDBUILDING AND POWER SYTEMS. Until now it was established that a vampires strenght is dependant on 1. their rank (as in who's blood turned them) and 2. their age. But now appearantly Ferid can eat vampires and absorb their strenght? If this was some universal but very difficult thing for any vampire to do, then I wouldn't be this salty. Also one of my favourite things about Ferid as an antagonist was, that power-wise he was on the weaker side. Despite being 'weak' he was still a major threat. He made up for his lack in actual fighting power with smarts and immaculate planning. But now he's another uber-strong genius. C'mon we already had Shikama and Rigr for that department. Bleh.

- now for the Yuu / Rigr and co confrontation, it's fiiiiine. I guess. At least Shikama is still somewhat of a formidable threat. Not to the major characters obviously but yk, it's something.

- rip Basteya. You showed up, slayed for a little and died.

- Kirsten still looks fugly as hell lmao

- so do Ulrich and Roger

- So, who will be faster: Shinoa in absorbing Shikama or Yuu in saving him? My bet is on Yuu purley bc he's supposed to be the main character but ig we'll see next chapter

- KRUL!!! AND THE BAT THING I FORGOT IT'S NAME

- sadly no Ferid / Krul brawl this chapter but yk what makes me excited for next chapter

- my guess is that now Krul is Ferids next target to be chomped. Hopefully she will beat his ass. Like when she first appeared. Ahhh the good old times

- 'A big fan of yours... M'lady Queen' lmao. What's next Ferid, will you put on a Fedora? Bro that last panel ain't it. Fuckin Sebastian of black butler wannabe 💀

[sitp-recs]

Anime Recs Pt 3

Hello hello! I’ve been sick on and off this month and had a blast revisiting my fave anime for this rec series. Following the queer friendly list and the sports anime list, I finally bring a selection of BL (boys love) titles. Most are Japanese 🇯🇵 except for Mignon 🇰🇷 and Tian Guan Ci Fu 🇨🇳 I’m not gonna lie, there’s a fair amount of adult themes and hardcore angst here, but you’ll also find sweet romance and a couple coming-of-age stories. One of my favorites from this list - Ai No Kusabi - is an old classic (I recommend the 1992 OVA series over the 2012 remake) and the quality is not the best, but all other shows are pretty recent and can be found online or on Crunchyroll. I initially planned for this to be my third and final rec list, but I got a few additional recs in the action/fantasy genre for a potential new list, if anyone’s interested? Stay tuned!

1. Ai no Kusabi (dystopian, tragedy)

Summary: This futuristic tale is set in a world ruled by a super computer Jupiter, where its cyborg creations, the Elites, rule over the human populace. Iason Mink, a high-class "Blondy" elite from the capital runs into Riki, a "Mongrel" from the slums, and makes him his "Pet". As Riki learns of the dangers Iason faces by keeping him, he finds himself developing feelings for his master.

2. Banana Fish (mafia, tragedy)

Summary: Set primarily in New York City in the 1980s, the series follows street gang leader Ash Lynx as he uncovers a criminal conspiracy involving "banana fish", a mysterious drug that brainwashes its users. In the course of his investigation he encounters Eiji Okumura, a Japanese photographer's assistant with whom he forms a close bond.

3. Doukyuusei (movie - school, romance)

Summary: Rihito Sajo, an honor student with a perfect score on the entrance exam and Hikaru Kusakabe, in a band and popular among girls, would have never crossed paths. Until one day they started talking at the practice for their school’s upcoming chorus festival.

4. Given (school, music)

Summary: High schooler Ritsuka Uenoyama is the guitarist for a band composed of himself, bassist Haruki Nakayama, and drummer Akihiko Kaji. He becomes a reluctant guitar teacher to Mafuyu Satō, a shy classmate, after repairing the broken strings on Mafuyu's Gibson ES-330. See also: Given movie.

5. Mignon (short series - vampire romance + the hottest smut you’ll see today!!!!🥵)

Summary: Centered on BL Vampire themes, the story portrays Mignon, an underground fighter in love with his doctor, who is coincidentally a vampire. The doctor's revelation triggers complications as their relationship unfolds.

6. Saezuru Tori Wa Habatakanai | Twittering Birds Never Fly (movie - mafia, drama)

Summary: The sexually masochistic yakuza boss, Yashiro, isn't the type to warm up to others easily. But when Chikara Doumeki, his newly hired bodyguard, catches his interest, he reconsiders his "hands-off" policy with subordinates. See also the side story: Don’t Stay Gold.

7. Sasaki and Miyano (school, romance)

Summary: Shy and easily flustered Miyano harbors an embarrassing secret - he is a "fudanshi", a boy who likes boys' love manga. Intrigued, the clueless delinquent Sasaki requests to borrow one, marking a shift in their strange dynamic.

8. Tiān Guān Cì Fú | Heaven’s Official Blessing (romance)

Summary: Crown Prince Xie Lian ascends to the heavens for the third time as the laughing stock among all three realms. On his first task, he meets a mysterious ghost who rules the ghosts and terrifies the heavens, yet, unbeknownst to Xie Lian, this ghost king has been paying attention to him for a very, very long time.

9. Umibe No Étranger (movie - romance)

Summary: On an island off the coast of Okinawa, two young men meet on a beach. Shun Hashimoto is gay and aspires to be a novelist. He is interested in Mio Chibana, a somber high school student, and starts to flirt with him. Day by day, the two of them grow closer, but then, suddenly, Mio decides to leave the island.

10. Yuri!!! On ICE (sports, romance)

Summary: Japanese figure skater Yuri Katsuki faces a crushing defeat during the Grand Prix finals and heads home, unsure of whether or not he wishes to continue his skating career. After a video of Yuri mimicking Russian figure skater Victor Nikiforov's routine goes viral, Victor decided to become Yuri's coach, much to the dismay of his coach, his fans, and his fellow Russian skater Yuri Plisetsky.

[dippingmytoesin]

A gift. A curse. Whatever this was, it was his now.

Given to him by his father, Nico now had a job.

Apparently, a man had been blessed by Hades, in return for a favor. He wouldn't tell Nico what the blessing was, though.

Now he was cashing in on that favor, in the form of dropping Nico on the doorstep of a gothic mansion with a letter and a backpack.

He stared at the old man. He wasn't sure what he was expecting, but it wasn't this. A butler?

He welcomed Nico inside, bringing him to one of the many rooms in the Manor. The butler opened the door for him, and the room was large. Not as big as Nicos room int he underworld, but about the size of his cabin at camp.

"I am Alfred, the butler of the Wayne family. This is where you will be staying, Mister...?"

"Nico." He said, placing his bag down on the bed.

"Mister Nico. How old would you say you are?"

Ncio gave him a look. That was an odd way of asking his age. But the again, that wasn't what he was asking. he was asking what age he wanted him to think he was. "15."

"Thank you. I understand the Lord wishes for you to work here, is that correct?"

"Yeah. Not to sound narcissistic, but do you know who I am, or did 'he' just send me here without telling you anything?"

"I have not been informed of your history. I know nothing more about you than that I am to treat you well, and to call you Nico."

"Right. Well, let's keep it that way. I like privacy." Nico nodded.

Alfred smiled knowingly, still standing outside of Nico's room. Was he a vampire or something?

"I will give you a tour, now that you have discarded your heavy bag."

Nico glanced back at his room, and then turned back to the butler, nodded, and followed after him.

He brought Ncio to the kitchen, bathrooms, pool, showed him the hallways of bedrooms, storage closets, ballrooms, basketball court, and way too many other things. He was never going to remember all of these.

"There are also, of course, places of note outside the mansion, such as the barn, the lake, and the forest. But what I believe you might be more interested in is the cemetery."

Nico looked at him. He would like the cemetery, but isn't it weird to hang out at a cemetery of rich people you're not related to?

"Is that... am I allowed to be there?" He asked, hesitantly. The second he says it, he curses himself. Of course he's allowed, all graveyards are his to roam.

"I mean, do I have permission from Mr. Wayne?" That's better. Not as stupid. Not as pathetic.

"Well, as part of your job, you will be helping me, and I clean the cemetery once a month. So you may do that, after I show you my methods of course. I'm not sure what you need, as you do not wish to tell me, so if you need anything, no matter how strange, feel no shame in asking me."

"Right." Did this guy think Ncio was a ghost or something? Did he think he needed to leech off the dead? Well, while it was calming, he didn't need to. He's being considerate and trying to offer whatever he can, not knowing what Nico needs. He's a good man.

"I will tell the boys to let you be, and not bother you with questions. While I doubt they will fully follow what I say, they will be less intrusive."

"The boys?" Nico asked.

"Ah, yes. My apologies, I didn't mention it sooner, but master Bruce had many kids, mainly 3 boys that live with him currently: Master Tim, Master Duke, and Master Damian. He is the youngest of Master Bruce's children. He does, of course,e have other children, such as Master Dick, his eldest, and others who are not his in law, but he considers his own; Cassandra and Stephane."

"Oh, okay." Nico said simply. He was used to being around lots of kids, because of camp, whether he wanted to be, or if they wanted him there. Annoying, yes. What he wanted, no. What he expected, not really. Something he could live with? Easily.

"Right then. Each day I make breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I will make additional food for you if you would like to eat it. If not, simply don't take it. You will not be required to eat with the masters, but I'm certain they would not mind your company."

"I think I'll pass."

The butler nodded, as if he had been expecting that answer. "Right. I didn't think you were the 'people' type." -What was that supposed to mean?- "So, I will post a schedule of what you are to do each day in the servents lounge- you remember where that is, yes?"

"Yeah."

"Lovely. For the first day, you will shadow me-" -haha, shadow- "-so you may learn my methods for different tasks. I wake at 4, and start working at 4:50. I assume you can follow that?"

"Yeah, I can do that." It wasn't like he slept much anyway. A sleep schedule will be good for him.

"Alright, I will leave you to your own devices for the rest of the afternoon. I hope you enjoy your time in Wayne Manor." With that, the butler left.

So Nico unpacked what little he had to unpack. Some clothes, some... actually, that was about it. Just clothes and a few trinkets.

He pulled his Walkman out of his bag, placing it in his nightstand drawer. He took a small, tattered photo of himself, his mother, and his sister out of his bag. Unfolding it carefully, he stared at the black-and-white picture. His father was there too, in the back with his face out of frame.

He slid it into his pocket.

There was the Hades figurine his sister stole for him, a celestial bronze dagger, and a normal dagger. He stashed both daggers on his person and then put the Hades figure on his nightstand.

He twisted his skull ring. He should go for a walk or something. But he was already tired from the tour. So, why not take a nap?

[iasmelaion]

Sinners

I'm gonna have a busy couple of weekends coming up, and I realized that if I wanted to see Sinners in a reasonably full theater at a decent time, I should probably get on that before the first of the big summer blockbusters crowd it out of theaters. So I went to see it last night, and despite it being a Tuesday night, a) the IMAX showing was sold out, and b) the regular showing was basically full too. Anyway, very glad I went to see it! What a movie! What a soundtrack! Pure exhilarating fun while still being a rich text that gives you plenty to think about. Highly recommend seeing this one in the theater, if you can. Spoilers below!

One of my favorite things about Ryan Coogler as a filmmaker is how confident he is in the way he shows rather than tells, and the way he makes few if any concessions to any part of the audience that might not know the specifics of the aspects of Black history and culture he shows. I wonder how Sinners will land with audiences who have next to no familiarity with or knowledge of the history of the Jim Crow South or blues music, because while Coogler shows that with meticulous detail and nuance, at almost no point does he explain any of it. I appreciate that faith in the audience and in his own film-making, and it makes for a much, much more immersive experience.

Assorted scattered thoughts/impressions:

The mix of genres is so, so delightful: historical drama, hints of a mob movie, musical, horror...it's a delicate balancing act to blend all these together, and to leave the viewer simultaneously satisfied with each genre while still wanting more.

The sense of history and place was so grounded, and so perfect. So many meticulously observed details, showing the Jim Crow South with an unsparing eye to its cruelties, but a loving attention to Black and marginalized communities.

THE CHOCTAW VAMPIRE HUNTERS. A WHOLE MOVIE OF THEM, PLEASE. I AM DYING OF CURIOSITY.

In general, while I don't think this movie is overly concerned with the ~lore~ and supernatural specifics of vampires, it does a very good job of worldbuilding via character: Smoke and Stack's clearly very interesting backstory that informs their choices now but which isn't ever infodumped about, their relationships, the above-mentioned Choctaw vampire hunters, Annie as a rootworker, the hints that Remmick is a very old vampire indeed, etc. There's like, a whole Southern Gothic and/or urban fantasy series' worth of stuff lurking in the margins of this movie.

THE MUSIC. oh my god the music. I've already listened to "I Lied to You" and "Pale Pale Moon" so many times, what bangers. And what a voice Miles Caton has! Truly the voice of a grizzled old blues man three times his age, it's astonishing. What perfect casting for the role of Sammie; you could be forgiven for thinking a young man traded his soul to the devil, Robert Johnson style, for a voice like that.

Vampires as representations of cultural appropriation/assimilation is a sufficiently clever, interesting, and new take on vampires that it overcame my vampire disinterest/ennui. Though I will say I did find the actual vampire of it all in terms of the action scenes less interesting than anything else in the movie.

To me, this is ultimately a movie about music, specifically about the history of Black music and the blues in America, and how it's inextricably entwined with appropriation and exploitation, and that's just so interesting and exciting to me, to have a horror movie about that! Really hope someone with more musicology knowledge does a podcast or video or something about all the music, because while I caught some of the references, I absolutely did not catch them all.

Listen. That Scene in the juke joint, when Sammie sings "I Lied to You". That scene alone is worth the price of admission, and it made me actually cry. And like, it's a little bit corny and ridiculous, in that way many musical sequences are! But also, it so, so perfectly understands what music is, what it can be, and what American music specifically can be with how much the blues changed the world: a bridge to the past, a connection to the future, an art and legacy that are eternal, an experience that carries its own history and transports us. To see the blues ripple backwards and forwards in time, to see that history laid out with such joy, to see Black art specifically rendered that way...goddamn. This song better win the Oscar.

(as an aside, lol cannot believe I missed the "the roof! the roof! the roof is on fire!" visual reference. I thought the roof being on fire during the song was, like, a premonition! lol no.)

Unless "Pale Pale Moon" wins. Seriously, what a banger, and goddamn, Jayme Lawson, what a performance! Sexy and sultry, with an edge of darkness. Put this one on your Halloween playlists for the rest of time.

lol this movie's horniness. I appreciated the attention paid to cunnilingus!

All in all, the best time I've had at the movies in ages, and I walked out thinking, "Oh, that's a new entry to the Canon. That's a new classic right there."

[klxudykai]

all 26 of my drs

soo as my bio says I have 26 drs!! and today I will be talking about each of them

in all honesty I thought it was a bit of a stretch to shift to that many, but who cares? the universe is unlimited so if I wanna shift to 3, 26, or even 100 I should be allowed to (and so should you!!)

anywaysss lets get into it

Anime drs

MHA - this is literally my MAIN DR. its the first ever dr I thought of shifting to and one of my favorites. I can't wait to shift there omg

MHA (fantasy au) - this isn't one of my top favs but it is def a cool one that I would enjoy fs

AOT (modern college au) - this dr is gonna be so fun I just know it

Haikyuu - volleyball is one of my FAVORITE sports so I already know this is gonna be exciting (I also had a haikyuu obsession ever since 2019 quarantine-)

★ ★ ★

Fame drs

singer - I always wanted to be a famous singer so this made inner 9 year old me SCREAM. I live and breathe music. all kinds of it, too. my playlist will go from SZA to Bone Thugs n Harmony to Billie Ellish and then to Deftones real quick

youtuber - this is another career that 9 year old me wanted. I've always looked up to YouTubers so I knew I would have a trip shifting to where I was one too

street racer - okay Im gonna be so honest and tell y'all rn I don't know jack shit abt cars- all I know is that I wanna have a hot pink car and blast flo milli while dusting a bunch of men in races (hot girl shit I fear-)

90s r&b singer - I love the 90s. the music, the fashion, all of it. absolutely amazing. that's it

band dr - I would love to be the lead singer of a famous ass band. I haven't decided if I was gonna join an existing one or make my own yet but one of the options will be happening

★ ★ ★

TV shows/Movies

hogwarts - when I first got into shifting a LOT of people were shifting to Hogwarts and honestly I understand why. it looks so fun there man

alice in wonderland - this is one of my FAVORITE movies. I love the weirdness of it all and its just so creative and calming for me. (I intend on scripting I live in a cute little cottage on a hill with my two headed cow because I have a major obsession with cows)

diary of a wimpy kid - I got one name for you. and that name is rodrick mf heffley. judge me I do not care but that man is FINE (he probably smells tho but I intend on scripting he isn't cause who tf wants a smelly man??). i also like the idea of being in loded diper

twilight - I've had an obsession with vampires and werewolves (ESPECIALLY werewolves) since I was in 4th grade so this move series and dr is right up my alley (I'm team Jacob btw even tho he's hella childish)

the breakfast club - the first time I watched this movie I was like "I'm officially shifting there". I love coming of age movies especially older ones like this so I didn't hesitate to add it to my list

riverdale - this series was kinda interesting tbh. I heard it got really wacky after the 3rd season though but I guess I'll find that out when I rewatch it (or when I shift idk). SPEAKING OF RIVERDALE- I had two dreams about shifting there and it was so crazy. like the first one was when I was in the diner with the characters and I was looking for my s/o, but I woke up before I could find him. and then the second dream I don't remember but I had the sensation I kissed someone???? so I'm pretty sure I found him LMFAO-

spiderman (itsv-atsv) - absolutely NO words for this one. I've had an obsession with this one ever since it came out. and I almost screamed in the movie theater when the producers hit us with that "to be continued" bs. also hobie brown <33

descendents - I was into every single original Disney channel movie that was released and this was one of them. AND I could be the daughter of Tiana like??? sign me up fr

monster high - these are literally THE monster it girls. it would be a crime to not shift there

total drama - this was the first reality tv show I ever watched and I was so here for it. they got real creative with the drama too

victorious - I LOVE arts. acting, painting, music, dance, you name it. if I could go to a school like this in my cr I would've already been there (oh wait I technically can)

power rangers - SPECIFICALLY the 2017 film. I don't feel like we got a backstory on half of the characters and its so disappointing but oh MAN when my boy DACRE got on that screen I almost hollered. this movie served so hard and it deserved a sequel badly.

stranger things - this was another obsession of mine and I couldn't have it any other way. its gonna be terrifying but badass (like nancy wheeler when she had that damn shotgun)

mid90s - this was a decision I made last week because I had JUST watched the movie and it was my obsession for a little bit too. I experienced a little home sickness (more like a lot of homesickness because I was SAD SAD)

★ ★ ★

other drs I thought of shifting to

demon slayer - this seemed pretty fun, but I heard that later down the plot it got boring and sucked pretty bad so I wasn't sure

kpop - I'm not 100% a kpop fan but I LOVE krnb so I was just thinking of making music like that but its still in the works a bit

avatar - I thought it would be cool, but I wasn't in love with the idea like I thought id be. maybe if I shifted to the first avatar I'd like it but idk yet

farm life - like I mentioned earlier I really love cows and thought a farm would be cool, but I kinda fell out of love with the idea so this most likely won't go all the way through

anastasia - this is one of the drs I most likely will still be shifting to because I just love classic Disney movies (and Dimitri was fine..)

ready player one - in all honesty, I completely forgot I intended on shifting there but its a fun ass concept

pitch perfect - okay but this movie was funny as hell plus singing so why not?

tinkerbell - this entire series was my Roman empire. they were my FAV when I was little and still are

10 things I hate about you - early 2000 movies are my favorite so when I watched this, I wanted to shift there asap

★ ★ ★

okay and I think those are all my drs!! this might be a little over 26 too but oh well LMFAO-

i really enjoyed making this and I hope y'all enjoyed reading it <3

stay tuned for more drs because i am always thinking of new ones to go to!!