#must think of something cute ! oh its Tad

[hooligangbilly]

Cute cute cute 🩷🩷🩷💓💓

[koiir]

TRYING TO LET YOU KNOW, I MUST LET YOU KNOW

— In which they try to show their interest in you and how.

Characters - heizou, xiao, Cyno, alhaitham, venti, zhongli x gn!reader

Genre - fluff

a/n - ITS TWICE DAY BABYYY…only a couple more hours until I see my girlies

Heizou who you never had a crush to begin with… rather he was someone who you knew from your classes from last year and thought he was a tad bit weird. But then he suddenly starts to make conversations with in which either leave you stunned or rather… shocked to say the least. You noticed it, how could you not? You didn’t think anything of it at first, but over time his staring became more frequent. From where he sat you would see his gaze in the corner of your eye.

There were times were you two would make eye contact. Not because you wanted to! It was just by coincidence that you looked at him and he was already staring, right? You didn’t have any feelings for him, so why did you always look out for him, why purposely try to make yourself look cuter knowing he was staring at you? It was complicated to say the least. I mean, did you just like the attention or?

But even then, whenever he would walk over to you to start his schenagins, you found yourself almost smiling and feeling flustered. The way he would take any opportunity to talk to you, about anything really… even if it was wired, you would end up laughing or smiling at heizou. Everyday he always had something to say to you, that would then leave you a little flustered inside.

Xiao who always seem to have an answer. At least when it comes to you. Whether is be helping you solve or a problem or giving you directions, Xiao always seems to be there in your time of need.

Every since xiao has started feeling this way… he can’t help but want to aid you with anything. He can only hope you will appreciate his efforts. It’s cute in the way he always has a blush coating his cheeks as he tries to remain calm around you, his friends can only sigh seeing him so down bad. Xiao always ignores their comments, his only focus being to make you maybe consider being his friend.

You remember the day you and xiao ate lunch together, the day you so called “officially” became friends. He swore he had never felt this happy before, he now had his chance. He wasn’t going to ruin it. He was so greedy, taking every moment to spend with you no matter what—he especially loved it when you two had study dates, him being able to help you if you struggled with a subject.

His feelings only got stronger when he say the way you always greeted him through text or in person, it made his heart flutter while he was flushed with blush. Xiao knew from now on, he would always be by your side—this was evident in the way he always sat next to you in class and partnering up with for you with any projects. Oh, did you just blush at his contact? Is xiao dreaming right now? Does he potentially have a chance with you?

You never knew why someone like Cyno all the sudden had to start following you around no matter what. You two weren’t even friends, right? Maybe it’s cause from that one time you laughed slightly at his really bad joke…you just couldn’t hold it in! But cyno felt more intrigued by you after hearing your laugh, it was stupid yes but maybe he could become your friend to hear more of that sound.

It was always when you two spent time together that cyno started to notice more smaller things about you—for example the way you tap your foot faster after not understanding a problem or question. He used this to his advantage whenever needed, to ensure that he could always help you before someone else did.

It’s the way Cyno always try’s to think of jokes that either relate to you…or things you like. He wants to make sure these jokes only apply to you, in hopes he makes you feel special. He also ensures to always get a smile out of you, no matter how many jokes it takes—he will make sure you become a giggling mess.

Alhaitham and you have always shared a love for books, they were the reason as to how you two became friends. You remember the day you sat reading a book—you scanned through it until he appeared in front of you and asked you your purpose for reading it. You two then kept talking until you exchanged numbers.

Whenever he finds a new read, you can expect Alhaitham to send you a photo of the page he’s on…and then he will continue to text you about his thoughts and so on. You do this too, you tell him all about the book you’re reading and he can’t help but smile seeing you so into your book.

It’s the way he struggles with what to gift you, wondering what could live up to his expectations for you. As he’s deep into thought—he remembers the way you always looked for creativity, maybe he could do something outside the box…something he never thought of doing before.

You find the present of his to be a scrapbook…filled with moments of memories of you two, some photos that you took and some that he took. Wait—how did he even take this? He must have made sure you wouldn’t notice…he smiled upon seeing your reaction to the book.

Venti and you are quite the odd pair, you two seem like you hate each other in the way you always seem to brush him off when he’s annoying you, but he’s the best person you could ever ask for. No matter what you can always expect a good time with him, for example—right now, you two at an amusement park. Oh…this was going to be a long day…

It’s in the way venti always has something new to show you, how excitement evident in the way he drags you to go on a new ride. Even though he always denies it, venti was never fond of big drops on rides…but he loved it. Especially after seeing you begging him to go on, he couldn’t deny you.

Now you two sat at the very front row…venti felt his heart beat so loudly he swears he can hear it. He wanted to grip on something, the drop was so close. Venti doesn’t know what took over him…but he looked at your hand and clasped onto it.

You gasped slightly at the contact, looking down at your hands…realizing venti had his hand over yours. You looked at him as he had his eyes closed tightly, awaiting the moment where the ride would drop.

Even with the ride coming to an end, venti still had his hand over yours—never letting it go.

Zhongli being the caring soul he is, will always make sure that you are well cared for. His favorite moments are when you listen to his storytelling, drinking the tea he made for you as your in the comfort of his home—he made sure everything was cozy, to the seating, to the temperature making sure it was cool enough. Everything had to be perfect, for you.

It’s in the way zhongli always makes sure to tell you the best information, In case anything happens—his heart would break if anything went wrong with you. He often sends letters if you travel for whatever reason, always telling you to take care of yourself and of the new information he has learned. It makes him feel as if you are there with him, listening to him even if in reality you are miles away.

This doesn’t stop him though from thinking of you from all the things he views. As he takes a stroll he looks at a flower, thinking if you would like it or not. He looks at the sun setting, wishing to watch it with you. Maybe once you came back he can ask you…you do love the scenic views.

A/n; after the concert…I was so mad that we didn’t get signal…LIKE IT WAS ON THE WHEEL BRO OMFG

[angelatmidnight1]

I just started Baldur's Gate 3 and would love some ler! tword hesdcanons for Astarion if you're feeling inspired? I saw some of his lines on YouTube Shorts and he's literally the reason I'm now playing, Lord help me. 😭🤣 I'm super early game(like, just met him, Shadowheart and Gale) but I do know what species he is, and know a certain something he tries at camp at some point- 👀

I will definitely write a tword fic for him at some point because the need for him to wreck me is strong, but some headcanons to encourage me to keep going to see the story, as I adjust to the gameplay and how it works would be so appreciated! ❤️ Again, only if you feel inspired for it though, no pressure and I hope you're staying hydrated lovely! 😊

A/N: Sure! Astarion's the reason I bought the game too. I saw a few clips of him on TikTok and added the game to cart 😅 I have a reader/Astarion fic somewhere in my drafts, but please tag me whenever you create yours. I'd love to see :D

Anyways, here's ler!Astarion. I hope I captured his personality okay. I'll add a tiny warning that this may come off a tad spicy, cause it's Astarion haha, but it isn't NSFW.

Ler!Astarion Tickle Headcanons

“Darling, you’re ticklish? Aha, how adorable.”

Astarion’s had a couple centuries to practice the art of gentle, and sometimes ticklish, touches. Of course he takes up the opportunity to work his craft. 

He’ll say the sweetest things to beckon his lee closer, with fleeting touches along sides and hips. “Come here, my dear. I promise I’ll be as gentle as a babe. Just a bit closer, hm?”

More words, sweet as honey, until he has his lee pinned under him. No matter the position, he wants physical contact the whole time. “Mm, I always did enjoy how you looked beneath me.”

He loves it when his lees become shy and flustered. It encourages his flirtatious antics even more. But, if they don’t? That’s okay. He loves a good challenge. 

Astarion’s touch is deliberate, but light and teasy. He takes his time to find the spots that make his lee squeal, and claws over it with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “My, you are a sensitive little thing, aren’t you?”

Eye contact is huge with Astarion; he drinks in his lees’ every reaction to his tickles. Every little giggle, gasp, squeak. His lee has never looked more beautiful, and he’s sure to tell them just that.

Speaking of drinking, it’s too tempting not to think about all of the blood pumping through his lee’s veins while he tickles them. He won’t drink without permission, but that doesn’t mean he can’t indulge in other ways.

“I could eat you right up, darling. And you know what? I think I will..” 

Astarion knows how to use his fangs with just enough pressure to tickle, and if he’s especially close with his lee, nowhere is safe from his nibbles. 

His favorite place to nibble are necks, but he’s also fond of ribs, hips, and thighs. He’ll love if his lee is especially sensitive to his light biting. “Gods, you are delectable. And those precious little giggles of yours just make you all the more sweeter.~” 

He could tease and tickle his lee all night, but if they truly need a break, he’ll ease off…just expect him to be a lil’ pouty. 

“Stop? Already? But, I was having so much fun. And I can tell that you were, too. Must we end our playtime so soon? …Oh, fine. Just promise I won’t have to wait too long before I can have you again.”

Of course, Astarion doesn’t always have to have an easy time with his lees. He loves it when they’re stern or, if anything, when they don’t want to admit how ticklish they are.

“Pft, if you’re not ticklish, then I’m not a vampire. It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I find it rather cute. You can look a beast dead in its eye, so long as it doesn’t wiggle its claws at you, hah.”

He, like most, if not all vampires, loves a good hunt. He can and will pursue obstinate lees for fun. Having stealth on his side is a huge advantage. 

His fancy, airier voice turns growly when he’s on the hunt. And, those honeyed words become devilish taunts. 

“You might want to run faster, darling. I’m right behind you.~ Perhaps if you surrender, I’ll be merciful.” 

Astarion gets a huge ego boost if he manages to get a stubborn lee laughing. "My name sounds wonderful on your lips. But, I would love to hear a 'please'."

If he has to hunt his lee down, it'll be awhile before he lets them go. "You're all mine, tav. Laugh for me~."

[presidentlokis-hornyhelmet]

:33 jealous pavitr x reader bc the reader just bought merch of him in his spider form and its an adorable little plushy and he gets mad bc they keep kissing and cuddling it instead of him the entire day/night

I'm (Not) A Jealous Guy

👉MASTERLIST 🕸️

Pairing: Pavitr prabhakar x Gender neutral!reader Tags: Jealousy Summary: Pavitr is totally NOT jealous of a Spider-Man plushie. Not at all. Never. (..or is he?👀) Jealousy prompts credit :  @creativepromptsforwriting

Also Read on AO3

“Pavitr!”, you yell, hugging your wall of muscle from behind. He smiles, pecking your cheek.

You were out shopping with Pavitr Prabhakar, your boyfriend and your superhero. He evidently hates shopping, with what having to stand for hours at a clothing store, but savours evey moment with you. The increasing crime rate in Mumbattan has him on his heels all night, and with having to study for finals it’s a tad too much of a stressor- which is why he never turns down an opportunity to let you pamper him.

Plus, it’s a great excuse to be cozy. To constantly hold your hand, kissing it intermittently, throw an arm around your waist and hug you close to feel your comforting warmth and, of course, admire you in your little moments -the kink in your brow when you think too hard, the amazed eyes when you find the exact thing you were searching for…

Is it even possible to fall for the same person so many times? Again and again and again?

“Look what I found!”

Your cheerful voice snaps him out of his reverie and he looks down at the toy in your hand. Oh, wait- it’s a merch: a plushie. Not just any plushie, it’s a plushie of him.. as Spider-Man.

Pushing his coveted raven curls aside for closer judgement, his eyes narrow in scrutiny. Huh. No one told him they made these. (Aren’t they supposed to get, like, a copyright or something from him..? )

“You don’t like it, Pav?”, You ask, seeing his slightly frowned lips and narrowed brows.

The plushie had a big head and comically smaller body, stuffed to make him look more like a teddy than a crime-fighter. The mask was a lot less detailed -admissible, but –good God, are those webs under his armpits?!  Well, at least they got his hair right. Just the perfect amount of curls, nothing less or more. 

“No, I’m just.. surprised”, he said, finally. “He’s okay.. But, Y/n, do I really have a big head?”

You giggle, giving his shoulder a playful punch as you hug the toy close to your chest. “Of course not, babe. It’s just a plushie, it’s made to look comfy. And sooooo cute!”

“Hey!”, he pouts, “You said I was the cutest! And he doesn’t even have dimples like me”

Pavitr aggressively points to his dimples to make a point but you take the opportunity to poke and pinch his cheeks. He tries to slap your hand away, giggling.

“Gods, I have made a terrible mistake”, you say dramatically, failing to hide your laughter. “You’re right! Nothing matches your cuteness, Oh, Prince of Dimples!”

“Y-Y/n..”, Pavitr stutters, going instantly pink in the cheeks, bashful. He’s always been shy about his dimples. You’re the only person allowed to touch them, apart from Maya aunty, which you take full advantage of.

You giggle clutching the plushie closer and pull him towards the next aisle, not noticing his eyes comically narrow at his cotton counterpart. As if he vows rivalry with it.

‘This isn’t over, fiend.’

-----

The plushie is evil. That’s the only reasonable explanation Pavitr could think of. A minion sent by some evil overlord to take your love away from him. Yes, that must be it!

What else makes sense? You’ve been spending more time with the cotton-head than with the real him, cuddling it all the damn time and taking it with you everywhere. You no longer hug him, preferring the stuffed imposter instead.

His nostrils flare comically as you snuggle the plushie closer to your chest, kissing it. Oh, the audacity! It has even commandeered Maya aunty’s attention, making her call it cute and adorable!

Pavitr must put an end to this before the evil plushie minion harms either of you.

“Why do you insist on flaunting him in my face?”

Maya auntie had invited you both over for tea and you were watching TV when Pavitr asks this out of the blue.

In his defense, he’s had enough of his stupid fabric-faced doppelganger taking you away from him. 

The cookie is stopped halfway to your mouth as you turn to him, brows raised in confusion. “Who?”

Pavitr makes a stressed noise, jerking his hand towards the plushie seated cozily in your lap. As if it owns you.

“I just don’t understand what you see in him.”

Amusement colours your features as realization dawns. “Pav, babe”, You begin as normally toned as possible, trying so hard not to giggle in his face. “He’s a plushie.”

“Exactly! Why would you need him when I’m right here?”

With a smirk he stands up on the coffee table and stretches his arms out in the classic Shah Rukh Khan pose.

You can no longer control and burst out laughing, clutching your tummy as you fall sideways onto the couch, much to Pavitr’s confusion.

“Oh my God, you’re so jealous! This is great to watch! Maya aunty, come, you have GOT to see this!”

He jumps down, mouth fallen open and cheeks gone pink as he stutters out a denial. “W-what? You’re crazy! Jealous? Me? Pff. Never.”

The face he makes as he tries to save face is even more funny. Maya aunty passes by, tapping her nephew’s shoulder. “Oh beta, jealousy can wreck a relationship.”

Pavitr scoffs, putting his hands on his hips for emphasis. Oh yes, he definitely isn’t jealous of a toy.

“M-maya aunty, I’m not jealous, I’m being absolutely reasonable. What would I even be jealous about? Pfft! Why would I ever be jealous of a.. a plushie? That's ridiculous. You’re being ridiculous. I am sooo not jealous, Y/n”

But even Maya aunty can control for only so long. She cups her mouth to hide her giggles, holding onto the arm of the couch for support as she sits down.

Pavitr huffs, watching the two important people in his life laugh like crazy at him. He just squints his eyes at you both and turns away, pouting.

“Oh, Pavu…”, You go up to him and hug him from behind, finally managing to get your reigns. Turning him around, you cup his face and press your foreheads together. A shy smiles blooms in his face as your noses touch.

“The plushie is no match for you, meri jaan, you’ll always be my hero; my Spider-Man. Nothing can replace you.”

He laughs, pulling you Into an embrace, blushing and giggling as you kiss his dimples.

“Plus”, you say, pinching his dimples as you feel them go hot under your touch, “You’re so adorable when you’re jealous.”

“I…- I’m not- oh, C’mon guys!”

Maya aunty joins your laughter when Pavitr pushes you away, playfully rolling his eyes as he escapes your pinching fingers.

______

A/N: look who's alive !1!!! Sorry for going mia all of a sudden! Hope you enjoyed the fic tho <3333333 lots of love - plhh

[themandaloriansdiaries]

Warm Embrace

Anakin x F Reader~

warnings~ none, just a sweet fluffy Anakin

From writer~ This is probably short but I just wanted to post something for you guys! I know the gif doesn't match the theme of this post but oh well. He looks cute. Also this is my first post like this so please be nice! its not going to perfect, I'm just having fun with it :)

Anakin being away on his mission made you a tad bit stressed. This was the first time you didn't go with him, and honestly you were extremely worried about him. Not only was that driving you crazy but the fact that he wouldn't be returning tonight and instead coming back in the morning drove you even crazier. You had grown used to falling asleep in his arms. With him being away it was hard for you to get any sleep. You let out a loud sigh as you tossed around in bed. you glance up at the clock, "why can't the time go by any faster" you sat up in bed, frustrated that you couldn't fall asleep, and annoyed at how slow time was going by. You were taken away from your thoughts when you heard someone knock on your room door softly. You didn't think it was Anakin since he was away on that mission, you knew he wouldn't be back so soon. You were confused on who it could be.

"Just a minute" you spoke quietly but loud enough for the person on the other side of the door to be able to hear you. Receiving no response from the person outside, you got up and wrapped yourself in your robe. "or don't say anything. that's fine too" you mumbled to yourself, still annoyed at the fact that you were having trouble sleeping. As you opened the door you looked up. Surprised, you see Anakin standing there with a smile on his face. Just as you're about to speak he holds his finger up to his lips for you to be quiet. You nod and move to let him in the room shutting the door behind you both.

You turn to look at him "did anyone see you come down this way?" you asked slightly worried. He shook his head. "no my love, I made sure" your stomach turned as he called you that, your cheeks turning slightly pink. "I thought you'd be back tomorrow" you spoke softly. he walks closer to you, wrapping his arms around your waist. "I couldn't wait, I missed you too much" he tells you as he rests his head in the crook of your neck. You smile and wrap your arms around him. taking in his scent, you relax and lay your head against his chest. "Well I'm glad you're here because I was having trouble sleeping" you pout. He grins down at you "worried about me huh?" you playfully roll your eyes and make your way back to the bed, with his hand in yours. "hmm, maybe" You take your robe off and lay back down, patting the empty space next you for him to lay down. "y/n why must you do this to me" he said almost in a whiny tone as his eyes stay on your body. "oh hush and get into bed with me" you spoke in a playful stern voice. he undresses himself and gets into bed, almost instantly pulling you back into his arms. "you're so warm" he spoke in a low tone, when he does that it drives you crazy.. In a good way. "and you're cold" you spoke back with a a smile on your face.

turning around to face him, his arms still wrapped around you. He doesn't waste another minute and plants a kiss on your forehead, causing you to let out a little giggle. "you just can't wait, can you?" earning another one of those pretty smiles from him. He kisses you once more "never, I just can't get enough of you" you snuggle into him. "and I can't get enough of you, Ani." as you both laid in each others arms, you felt yourself slowly growing tired, your eyes slowly starting to close. Anakin had noticed you starting to fall asleep. "goodnight my love" he spoke in a low tone, caressing your back gently. Too tired to open your eyes, you mumbled softly "goodnight sweet boy" and just like that you were fast asleep in your lover's arms.

[lettucethesoviet]

I love The Knight (Reverse: 1999) which means that I will be thinking angst about them.

So far, these are the things that I've thought about;

- Oder is supposed to be Alde, who is Oliver's sister and the fianceé of Roland. Considering that Oder died, I feel like he must've been just a tad bit heartbroken lol... Which is funny because in the epic it's reversed... OMG REVERSE 199—

- He's a spirit now, and he's dead. There must be some sort of delay from his death to his 'ressurection'. Imagine if he woke up, wondering where everyone went, having memories of the war, then realizing that he is merely a spirit, or atleast knowing that everyone he knows and loves; families and friends, are all dead. 1200 years is a long time.

- He said that's it's been a "while" that he celebrated the Knight Comic Festival, which is set on his birthday. I feel like he'd be replaying the memories of the Festival in his head during his birthday, perhaps talking to the plants and making up stories about the nature around him. I thought it'll be cool if Druvis III heard The Knight's stories via plants but wasnt really able to pin-point where he is(?). I'm sure they havent met but it'll be cute if they met and Druvis realizes idk it's not canon lol

- The fact that he calls himself as "Someone" and not "I/my/mine" gives me the thought that he doesn't think that his name is worthy enough to even refer to as himself. Sure he'll talk about Roland but he wouldn't explicitly say that HE is Roland. Though at the same time its like he has accepted it since his Monologue says that he'll just start anew and acknowledges that his past will be forgotten. Imagine being the only person that knows your beloved comrades....

- I wouldn't say he's depressed, but he's WAYY too casual about the things that happened, which means that he has already moved on, but hey, he misses them sometimes (or maybe always). In his times of solitude, he'd probably think about how things would be if he didn't die, if Oder didn't die, or just some minor changes in his life.

- Since he's a person of piety, I feel like he'd imagine his friends and family just waiting for him in the afterlife. Perhaps since he's just a spirit now, he'd never see them again. Though like I said, he probably moved on from it, and now that he knows APPLe, Vertin, An-an Lee and the others, he cares about them and wishes not to leave their side so soon. He's loyal to Timekeeper as well too, so that's a plus! We love healthy-minded characters here.

- Usually I think of the character's Insight 2 as something that's canon in their story, whether it will happen in the future, current or in the past. So to see The Knight's Insight 2, where he's bowing infront of an angel, and based by his anecdote and his past, I'm thinking that perhaps he recieved some sort of enlightenment, I mean he has Durandal, and from what I know, the one issuing the "Tap of the sword" uses their *own* sword, and not the sword of the knight (CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG PLS). But then it could also just be the angel giving him a "knighted" ceremony again as a Spirit now that he's uh, dead. He still has value as a knight, and he will faithfully do his duty. I'm so happy that he doesn't resent it and actually takes pride in it.

- Since he's a spirit now, and spirits doesn't really, necessarily eat/drink, he would probably find it filling to just see the team having fun, enjoying snacks and having drinks. Perhaps he'd sometimes think what it would be like to eat/drink again, but in all honesty he'd probably just be happy that he now has someone to talk to.

That's all I have rn...

Additional (Unrelated):

- Him and Dikke would act like parents while APPLe is the cool uncle, sorry I just like to think that Regulus and Matilda would be close...oh and Sotheby too! Sotheby would def be talking to Dikke as a second opinion! Yasss found family

- For some reason I'd think he wanted to be a father at some point but chose to dedicate himself as a knight, and now just 1.2k years later he's..acting upon it to idk, Oliver and An-an?

- APPLe is the first one he connected with deeply after a very long time. But then I fear that APPLe will die at some point and the friends/family-dying thing repeats again :(. And even if APPLe lives he would be devastated about Regulus and the others passing away.

[inairbinad]

WIP Wednesday Ask Game

Thrilled to be tagged by @steves-strapcollection tonight because I genuinely need a kick in the ass to work on these. (No seriously, please force me to.)

RULES

In a reblog (or new post w/ rules attached), post up to five (5) filenames of your WIPs; not titles, file names.

Post a snippet from one of them. Snippet must be words you wrote in the last 7 days. We’re posting progress here. If you haven’t made any, go make some and come back to post!

After you’ve posted, people can send you an ask with one of your file names. You must then write 3 sentences in that file. If the filename is one you can’t share from (for example, an event fic), write 3 sentences on it anyway, and then 3 more on another to share.

That’s it! You can invite others to join in, or just post. If you tag me in your post, I will send you an ask request!

MY WIPS (we've officially reached none of these have titles territory)

s2 Steddie

The Saving Chrissy One

Hop and Steve bonding

Steve the botanist/florist

Harrington charm (5 times + 1)

MY SNIPPET

This is from Steve the Botanist/Florist, a goofy little meet-cute idea that wormed its way into my brain and set up shop. This is literally the only thing I've written in the last seven days that isn't the Steve's Got a Date epilogue 😅

“I need a birthday gift for a girl who will roast the shit out of me if I show up to take her out to dinner empty handed,” Eddie said, feeling a tad frantic about having waited this long to get Chrissy something.

“I think we can manage to avoid getting you roasted,” the absolutely fucking delectable man who worked in the flower shop said with a low laugh. He leaned on his elbows on the counter and looked up at Eddie through his lashes, and Eddie nearly swooned. “Are we talking a gift for a girlfriend, sister, friend, or…?”

“Just friend,” Eddie said, then realized how ridiculous it sounded to call Chrissy just anything, and course corrected. “Best friend, actually. Why, do you have certain flowers that mean certain things?”

Really, Eddie hoped this guy was just fishing for information about if he might be single, but he was doing his damnedest not to jump the gun.

“I mean, sure,” the man shrugged. Eddie wished he was wearing a name tag. He wanted to feel this beautiful creature’s name rolling around on his tongue. “I’m a firm believer in buying people flowers based on what they actually like, or you do, but I can ramble on about symbolism if you want.”

“I’d probably listen to you talk about just about anything,” Eddie admitted freely, as he leaned his hip against the countertop. Stopping to flirt would make him late, but Chrissy would get it. He hoped she would get it, anyway, because the smile he got in return made Eddie weak in the knees. “But I know next to nothing about flowers.”

“Seems like a perfect match, then,” the man said with an easy smile. “I’m Steve, by the way.”

And oh, Eddie was definitely done for. He’d be lucky if someone came along to scoop him up off the floor from the puddle he was surely turning into in time to make it to Chrissy’s.

[xamaxenta]

Marco knows there a question lying beneath the rumble of Ace’s voice, whenever he gets smoky in tone

He tries not to let it effect him anymore, but Ace has a talent for skinning you when you weren’t fully aware of it, and by the time you did you were nothing but meat and bone before him

“What can I do for you?” Marco bites first and Ace circles around his desk, predacious in movement and his expression convincingly schooled into nonchalance

“Mm. Not for me, for Jude,” Ace names one of Marco’s logistics officers, nice guy, bit of a temper and drinking problem— something that made them butt heads on occasion.

Marco knows what this is about now, its about shore leave so he says so, Ace arches an eyebrow impressed as always at Marco’s talent for remembering the myriad of things he must.

“And what does he want you to do about it ?” Marco drops his pen into the clawfooted inkwell Ace had purposefully forged with the help of Jozu and some Wano elbow grease and gifted to him on his last birthday, its brass and apparently modeled after his chicken feet.

“Dunno honestly. He seemed pretty certain i could help him get it approved.” Ace hesitates on the corner of Marco’s deck, amused to have been caught right away.

“So he sent a messenger. Did he have anything else he wanted you to say to me?” Marco murmurs, plays into Ace’s game and lowers his voice as the candle on his desk sputters, sparks once

“Hmmmm.” Ace perches on the corner he’s been trapped into and pretends to think but the candle gives away his emotions and Marco loves him immensely.

“He did say he was having regrets over what he said to you last.” Ace reaches into his pocket and tugs out a scrubby piece of parchment. A report, on behavioural misconduct.

Marco skims it and then tosses it into the open bin beside his desk with a delicate sniff. Ace says nothing but the warmth of his existence and the intimacy of his nearness is rather distracting.

“He also says he will be covering for Kells and Lee next month if he can take shore. wanna bet he’s got a lover?” Ace leans in, smile edging charming and voice hotter.

“Give it here.” Marco says after another moment of deliberation, Ace’s smile turns just a tad bit smug and tugs out the second roll of parchment from his pocket, this time much more carefully treated and Marco scans the form before signing off on it with lazy flourish

“Tell Jude���“

“Tell him yourself,” Ace cuts over his boyfriend, he doesn’t know the ins and outs of their situation, only what he’s heard through his own division. Apparently it had been quite the spectacle and both parties had ended up saying some choice things. Its almost tragic that Ace had been away on a mission to outer territories and missed the drama. It’s difficult to piss Marco off, Ace would know.

“Commander.” Ace purrs, persuasive and cunning both, reminding Marco of his position and damn him this has been going on long enough hasnt it

“Where is he?” Marco looks anywhere but the shadows blending across Ace’s skin.

“Orlop.”

“Great. I’ll run it down to him later.”

“You’re the best,” Ace informs him, always the supportive little cheerleader in his life, Marco wishes the logia would extend that positivity out towards himself.

Shifting in preparation to get up and leave Ace tips his hat at Marco who scoffs and snags him around the wrist.

“Going somewhere?” Marco did not intend to bring out the bass but his voice drops hard and Ace flusters immediately.

“Not anymore?” Ace replies, rhetoric, but doesnt resist when Marco tugs him over to coax the younger man close. Ace trips into his lap with a distinct lack of grace, but its cute nonetheless

“You really need to stop taking on all these extra requests.” Marco pretends to scold him and Ace scowls at him briefly

“And miss out on seeing you?” Follows up the petulance with a quick kiss to Marco’s nose, brushes his lips against his cheekbone and into the scruffiness of his beard

“Oh, is that what this was really about”

“Duh?” Ace slides his hot palms beneath the folds of Marco’s sash.

The form can wait, Marco is a busy man after all.

Ace rolling the R in Marco’s name whenever he wants something from him, practically purrs out his name

Its why the first division always always come to Ace with special requests and why he’s always so happy to help because of two things

1. He gets to see and bother Marco, maybe bully him into taking a break

2. Potentially theres a win for everyone

[primofate]

Shortfic: Zhongli x Childe x gn! Reader (Taking care of sick reader) Poly relationship

Listen, don’t sue me. I just have so much Zhongli x Childe x reader brainrot. I just think the dynamics would be so good. Zhongli being such a daddy good caretaker and Childe being... well Childe being Childe and you in the middle of it all, LIKE WHY THE HELL NOT? Yeah idk, I’m sorry, I indulged myself.

Categories: poly relationship, protective Childe and Zhongli, worry, possessive, fluff

Warnings: hinting at sexual activities (still very SFW though), poly relationship, not tagging anyone because I’m not sure if this is your thing. Let me know tho.

Characters: Zhongli x gn! Reader x Childe

"Zhongli…" 

Childe stands in front of the man with a defeated look in his face, eyes turned towards the floor. 

Zhongli was enjoying his tea, sitting at the table, liking the peace that it gave him. With a soft 'clink' he sets his teacup down and looks at Childe, calm gaze placed on the younger man. 

"Childe, they will be fine,"

"I just don't understand what went wrong, was it too cold last night? Or were they overworking themselves?" 

Zhongli sighs to himself, standing to close the gap between him and Childe. He cups a hand around the crook of Childe's neck, thumbing gently on his jaw. 

"These things just happen sometimes, Childe. Perhaps it was something they ate, or even just a minimal change in their routine," 

"But they look like they're in so much pain," 

"I don't doubt it, their fever is at its peak at the moment. Not to worry, I've contacted Baizhu to take a look at them in the afternoon," Zhongli moves to remove his hand from Childe's neck, but the ginger haired male grasps on his wrist and stays it there. They stand in front of each other in silence, Childe swallowing the lump in his throat that had formed out of worry. 

"Although we aren't bound by a contract…" Zhongli's voice tones down to a near whisper, Childe's eyes flicker up towards his. "...We're bound by an even stronger bond. Rest assured Childe, we are doing the best that we can," Zhongli moves his hand an inch downward towards his shoulder and squeezes it, and, in a slow and comforting motion, presses a kiss on Childe's forehead. "They will be fine," Zhongli repeats in a way that gives Childe the confidence and reassurance he needs. 

The younger male takes in a big breath and sighs it out slowly. He nods and let's go of Zhongli's wrist, head turning the slightest to listen if you've woken up. 

Nothing. 

He kinda wished that you did, so that he could ask you how you were doing. If anything hurt. If you needed anything. 

"Why don't you rest for a moment, I'll check on them in the next few hours," Zhongli motions over to the tea set on the table. There were 3 teacups filled up, one for him, one for Childe and one for you. "It wouldn't do if both of you got sick now, would it?" 

Childe sighs and agrees, "Tell me if they wake up," and so for the rest of the day Zhongli stays by your bedside, changing the wet towel atop your forehead and merely watching the quickened rise and fall of your chest. Your face is flushed pink with the extra heat your body is producing, face clearly uncomfortable. 

Suddenly Zhongli understands Childe’s anxiousness. You looked as if you were about to break. Childe was wildly protective of you, compared to Zhongli who always seemed to see things in a neutral manner. Looking at your current state though, he can't help but feel a stronger need to hide you away from the dangerous world. 

Zhongli leans back in his seat, closing his eyes to rest momentarily. He had probably fallen asleep because in the next moment he hears his name on your lips. Even without opening his eyes, he knows that it’s you. He pushes himself up and comes to see that you’re sitting up as well, flush still on your face, sweat sticking to your forehead. “Y/N,” he’s a little startled, but motions for you to wait. If Childe finds out that he didn’t call him at the first moment, he’d be livid. 

The moment he steps out of the room, his foot just an inch out, Childe is up and walking towards him. “Are they okay?” he asks, and Zhongli merely opens the door wider for him. Childe becomes a literal clingy koala at the sight of you. “Y/N!!!!” and leaps forward to give you a bear hug. There’s so many things coming out from his mouth that you weren’t even sure what he was saying anymore. 

“Ahahaha…” You laugh nervously as he grips you in a tight hug. Zhongli just watches, the edge of his lips slightly upturned into a small smile. “I’m fine, Childe, I think I just need some rest and maybe something for the annoying headache I’m having,”

You pinch in between your eyebrows as Childe pulls back, smoothing your hair back and fussing over you. “Medicine, right? How ‘bout water? Do you need water?” You smile brightly at him despite the fatigue and he beams back, infinitely glad that you were awake and talking to him. He continues his line of questioning, “or maybe kisses? How about kisses? Hugs? I have plenty to give,” It was your laugh that let him know that you were feeling better, at least better than last night when he had just found you passed out on the floor. 

“Just some tea is fine,” you reply, leaning forward to rest your head on Childe’s shoulder, him wrapping his arms around you in response.

“We’ve poured you a cup of tea already, I’ll go and fetch it,” Zhongli says, opting to give the two of you some time alone, but not before pressing a kiss atop your head, just as he had to Childe earlier. 

“How do you feel? Are you in pain?” Childe yet again asks and you shake your head, “It’s manageable, don’t worry too much,” but your lover sighs and caresses your hair carefully. Zhongli comes back a moment later with Baizhu, who had arrived just as he was fetching your tea.

“Ah, Y/N, it’s a good sign you’re awake,” Baizhu smiles sweetly, much too sweet for your liking. Childe takes himself away from your bed and lets Baizhu do a complete check of your vitals and condition. He stood side by side with Zhongli, stance relaxed. 

Baizhu isn’t stupid. He knows the kind of relationship the three of you have. He’s been on house call another time for Childe who had sustained quite the injury. He saw how you worried over him, and saw how Zhongli’s expression creased into anxiousness. 

The situation was the same today. Except that you were the patient, Childe’s face was the one covered in anxiety and Zhongli… Well… He didn’t seem too bothered by the whole thing but if you looked closely, he was slightly tense than he usually was. 

Baizhu just wanted to have his fun. How far were their boundaries, really?

“How are you feeling, dear?” Baizhu asks you as you’re sipping on the warm tea. “...Tired and… a splitting headache” You put away the cup of tea with a slight sigh, still feeling your muscles cry out for help. “Is that so?” Baizhu tilts your head up to look at him, fingers under your chin, and he peers into your eyes, a tad closer than he was before.

Zhongli and Childe tense at the motion, but don’t make a move to interfere. “Just checking your pupil dilation,” there’s an undertone of mischief in his voice, though you couldn’t tell if that’s just how he usually was or…

Baizhu’s hands slide down to your arm, taking your wrist and checking your pulse. A moment of silence passes, “Just a little fast but otherwise normal,” and lets go of your arm. He prescribes a medley of Chinese herbs to be taken as tea, telling Zhongli and Childe how to prep it. He finishes his examination rather quickly, “A normal fever, if it worsens tomorrow then you should call me once again,” he takes your hand and rubs it rather affectionately. You’re a bit surprised at the action.

As if that wasn’t enough, another one of his hands cup your cheek as he gives you a quick wink, “I wouldn’t mind getting called multiple times for such a charming face like yours,” the blush on your cheeks is suddenly not just because of the fever. 

One would think that Childe would react faster to the pharmacist’s advances, but it was Zhongli who sets his hand down rather roughly on the other man’s shoulder, “Baizhu, that’s unnecessary,” The tall man says. Almost commands.

Childe was only mid step. The green-haired man chuckles, the white snake around his neck weirdly quiet today. “I’m merely examining your...interesting arrangements, they ARE a piece of art--” and the warning squeeze on his shoulder told him that he should be going. 

He chuckles again, but lets himself be led out by Zhongli. Childe takes his place next to you, the mattress caving at his weight, “...Were you blushing just now?” he accuses you, eyes squinted.

“N-No… It’s the fever…” but your stutter tells him otherwise. He raises an eyebrow in question, obviously not believing you.  

You gulp a little, “I was just caught off guard… it’s not that I enjoyed what he said…” you pout a little. Childe smiles at the cute look on your face, he was merely teasing. “Oh? Well, doesn’t matter, I’ve seen a lot more different expressions on your face than just a small blush,” there’s a quick smirk on his face and it’s here that your face turns into a tomato. You know exactly what he was insinuating. 

Thankfully, Zhongli strolls in and sees the alarming redness on your face, concludes that Childe must have said something to fluster you again. “They still require some rest, Childe, perhaps leave the teasing for a little later,” 

His tone is stern, but only because he knows you needed more sleep. Childe smiles but continues, “I think they’re just fine! See how their cute little face blushes just for me, Zhongli,” he takes your face in his hands and turns it towards Zhongli, who was...admittedly slightly enamored by the charming display.

Zhongli coughs into his hand and turns his gaze away, “Strange how energetic you are now, just a moment ago you were beside yourself with worry about Y/N,” It was your turn to tease Childe at the information Zhongli just gave out. “Oh? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you so much!”

Before Childe could even reply Zhongli continues the sentiment, “Yes, he looked as if he was about to cry,”

“Th-That’s not!” Childe retracts from you, wanting to say that it wasn’t true but his words get stuck in his throat and it is now his turn to turn his gaze away in slight embarrassment. Zhongli and you snicker at his change in attitude but you were also curious as to what Zhongli was doing while you were fast asleep, “and you, Zhongli? I suppose you’re not one to worry too much,”

There’s silence on his end, with his arms crossed you can’t gauge his expression but he was having an internal battle on whether or not to tell you that he was actually just as worried. But...he had to be the strong one for the two of you. A ghost of a smile plays on his lips, strolls over to you and leans down to quickly kiss the side of your lips. “I worry in my own way, dear,” The way he says dear sends shivers down your spine, and you know in your heart that he had been worried too, just toned down to balance out Childe’s anxiousness. 

Childe suddenly gets in bed with you, pulling you down for a rest. His chest is against your back, arms around your waist and mouth whispering in your ear “The two of us will always take care of you, believe me,” You smile a little and close your eyes. “I know,” just as Zhongli joins in, placing himself at your front. 

Sandwich cuddles are your favourite and although you’re very much running a fever, the warmth from them is soothing. Zhongli drapes an arm on both of you, and leans down to kiss you on the forehead, brushing away stray strands of your hair as if you’re porcelain. When he pulls away he sees the look Childe gives him. A ‘Do-I-get-one-too?’ written all over his face. 

Zhongli chuckles, leans in a little bit further to place one on the other man’s forehead, and watches the two of you drift in and out of sleep. 

It’s certainly one of the most beautiful sights he’s witnessed.

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[bubblyhoney]

can i request a fic where sapnap takes the reader to his hometown? like the classic going to places he went to when he was younger. maybe playgrounds and ice cream shops idk

places i used to go

warnings: language of course, an allusion to virginap, my uneducated guess of what sapnap was like in highschool, tiny detail of long haired!sapnap, singular canon detail of underage drinking, jokish about marriage

tags: sapnap x gn!reader

words: 2191

A/N: you are a god, anon. i love comfy and nostalgic fics like these and it was so fun to write. if you hate it dont tell me but if you like it lemme know akskdjd

inbox/requests: open

-

The wind whips fast on your bare fingers, cool and quick and raising goosebumps in its wake. You blink in the haze of the early sunset, head lolled to the side of the headrest. It feels good.

“That’s where I went to high school.” Sapnap interrupts your thoughts and points a finger at a collection of tall brick buildings down a side street. The silver of the lettering is dull, but you can still feel the nostalgia.

“And you’re about to see the park that me and my friends used to hang out at after work and—actually, nevermind.” His arm drops to the middle console and he looks straight ahead with slightly pinker cheeks.

“Do what?” You ask, voice all sweet, and a grin grows on your face. You turn towards him and wiggle your eyebrows.

“Nothing. Homework.” He avoids your eye contact and hikes his hand up higher on the steering wheel. “Anyways— Do you want to get some food before we head out? I know a great place.”

You two were just coming to a close on your little trip to visit his family; it was his step-mom’s birthday and you decided to make a week of it. It was your first long-term trip with Sapnap, and also your first time meeting his dad’s side of the family. You were proud to say she loved you. His little sister took a little more effort to talk to you of her own volition, but soon enough she was on your side.

You have a couple hours to kill before making your flight back home, so Sapnap has taken it upon himself to give you a quick tour of his hometown.

“Yeah,” you decide, bottom lip popped out. “Can we get ice cream after?”

“Uh, duh.” The Neighbourhood’s Stargazing starts through the speakers and he reaches to turn it down. “I’m so ready to get home and sleep.” He stretches his neck in his seat, letting out an uncharacteristically inappropriate grunt when his bones pop. You make a disgusted face, nose wrinkling, but stretch your own back, slumping down in the seat. The day had been full of packing up and this horrible hike his dad liked to do early in the mornings, so you two were pretty beat.

“Okay, we’re here,” he announces three sleepy minutes later in his best attempt at a whisper. Lifting your head off of the corner of your seat, you blink in the setting sunlight as a yawn splits your face. “You’re so cute.”

“Shut up,” you mumble, and struggle to get your seatbelt off in that post-nap haze. You’d barely been asleep for thirty seconds, damn it. The air is a swampy heat when you step out of the car onto rocky gravel and nearly twist your ankle climbing over the curb. Sapnap catches you by the lower back, trying to hide his laugh but failing miserably. You slide him a dirty look, smacking his shoulder as hard as you can manage while limping towards the front entrance.

The door jingles when you two breach the doorway, alerting a bored-looking hostess that the circus has arrived. She looks at Sapnap a second longer than she should, eyebrows screwed together in silent confusion. But she leads the two of you to a booth near a large window, handing you sticky menus and promptly fucking right off to the host station. She nearly runs.

“Do you know her?” You ask, inconspicuously hiding your face in the search for their 24/7 breakfast menu. You feel his eyes on you.

“Don’t think so.” He leans on one elbow and slides his phone out of his jeans’ pocket. In the 25 seconds it takes for you to find their french toast and sides menu, he has browsed and closed his phone with an animatedly shocked look on his face.

“What?” You give him a weird look and put down the menu.

“I totally went to homecoming with that girl.” He eyes the hostess. You glance over at her again, meeting her gaze, and offer a polite smile. She turns away quickly, eyes wide.

“She’s cute,” you say, voice high and fake, and he drums his fingers on the tabletop as an amused look makes its way onto his face.

“Are you—?”

“What?” You reply right back.

“Nothing.”

Thank God the server comes up to your table then and starts asking for drink orders, or else you’d have to admit (sheepishly) you were a tiny eensy-weensy bit annoyed. Only a tad. But after requesting a Dr. Pepper and a water the conversation surrounding the nervous-looking hostess dies.

“I’m so hungry I think I feel my stomach shrinking.” You flop your head onto your arm on the table top and make a whiny noise into the stack of napkins your server left at the table. Sapnap rubs his thumb into the side of your forearm, touch warm and nearly dissolving the pangs of hunger and jealousy.

“You weren’t hungry an hour ago.” He lifts your hand to his face and plants a kiss on the back of it. Oh, pulling out the big guns, huh? “I would have made you something.”

You tilt onto your chin, pouting, and stare up at his cute face. His cute, scruffy, perfectly-kissable face.

“I think I got hungry staring at you for half an hour.” A mischievous grin grows on your previously-petulant face and he just shakes his head.

“I do have that effect,” he admits with cockiness in his tone, lifting his eyebrows and leaning back into the booth with his lips pursed.

The server returns with two glasses and takes your food orders onto their little yellow notepad. You chug the water down when they leave for the kitchen, getting your lap and chin thoroughly wet in the process. Sapnap just snorts at you and shoves the napkins your way.

“So,” you start, patting dry your jeans. “tell me what you were like in high school.” You cross your arms and settle into the booth, smirk on your lips.

“What I was like?” He parrots, sipping at his soda, looking thoughtful. “Firstly, a virgin.” You make a noise. Duh. Dude had a buzz cut his junior year. (You’ve seen the pictures. His step-mom particularly likes them.) “Secondly, I was actually— well, I wasn’t popular, but I had a lot of friends. We were all semi-athletic lonely band kids but we had fun. Had one girlfriend senior year but she went to Cal Tech in the fall and I didn’t. I, um, worked at a Dairy Queen in the summers and gained so much weight I had to lose all over again for Unified Track.”

“Relatable,” you comment, drinking noisily at your water. He fiddles with the paper straw wrapper and crunches it up into a ball. It goes soaring into your drink with a quiet “Kobe” and you just give him a look. He smiles toothily right back at you. “Stop being cute, I’m trying to listen to your story.”

“Oh, my bad,” he mocks. “Anyways. That’s what I was like in highschool.” You fish the paper ball out of your water and flick it wetly at his arm. It sticks and you choke on a laugh, cheeks puffed.

Two plates of warm food are set down loudly onto the table and you thank the server with a surprised smile, Sapnap mirroring you.

Two minutes of wordless chewing passes, minds occupied just by “food, me eat” instead of anything related to your previous conversation. You realize that Sapnap is one of the loudest chewers ever, and he realizes that you fail to notice the streak of maple syrup in your hair.

“C’mere,” he mumbles through a mouthful of omelet and hash browns and beckons you with his hand. You lean closer, chewing slowly, as he pats a napkin at the strands of hair trapped in syrup.

“Thanks, baby.” You take the napkin from him and pause your assault of the warm french toast before you to clean the sticky sugar out of your hair. He just watches you, half of a smile on his lips.

You two finish your food in record time. It’s borderline vacuum-like. There’s a short grace period where you just sit like two lazy cats, slumped down in the booth and holding your full stomachs. But the check comes soon after, and you both pay your way and are out of the restaurant without any mad dashes for the bathroom. A miracle, really, because of the American-like amount of butter you both consume.

“I’m a much more functional person now,” you mutter into the cotton of his shoulder, swinging your hand in his. He just hums in agreement.

“I guess we’re not getting ice cream, then,” he teases, and you just groan in response.

“I don’t feel like having diarrhea on a plane, unfortunately.” You sigh heavily when you have to split and get into your respective sides of the rental car.

The entire trip (somewhat roundabout because of the amount of side quests to show you things from his childhood) to the airport Sapnap is a chatterbox. He’s like this when he has sugar: either bouncing off the walls with energy or talking your ear off.

“That’s where my dad proposed to my step-mom. I was kinda young but I remember being surprised at how big the ring was— dude broke the bank for her.” It’s a little gazebo you catch a glimpse of through the trees in a park. It probably was an incredibly picturesque moment, and you can sense how much she must have loved it. With just meeting them this weekend, you can already see how much love those two have for each other.

You hope people can see how much you love Sapnap.

“Oh my God, it’s still there.” He points out the side of your window to what looks like a Dairy Queen that has been through World War 3. “My buddy Eric and I once spilled a gallon of that liquid ice-cream-shit all over the men’s bathroom.”

You shoot him a horrified look. “Why was it in the bathroom?”

He just smirks.

“—And that’s my Uncle Ron’s house. Had my first beer there.”

“And last, hopefully,” you add, pulling a disgusted face. The two story bungalow is cute, and one of your favorite colors: olive green. “That shit is nasty.”

He just shrugs and continues down the side street.

“Is this the park you were talking about?”

He pulls into the gravelly parking lot of a small clearing of tall trees, a picnic table and campfire sat squat in the middle. But he doesn’t respond, just turning the car off and climbing out. He reaches the passenger door without speaking, and opens it for you. You climb carefully out, confused.

“Come on.” He takes your hand and starts for a small path to the left of the picnic table. The mid-sunset shade envelopes the both of you.

“I hope this isn’t where you kill me.”

“No,” he snorts. “I just wanted to show you something.”

It’s just a few moments of stumbling through the damp underbrush before you’re coming face to face with a small, mossy pond that sits right underneath an incredibly old willow tree. He stops right on the edge of the rocky path and turns toward you.

“This your make out spot?” You ask between a grin as he snakes an arm around your waist and tugs you flush to him. Your innocent smile fades when you feel the press of his lips to the side of your neck, light and ticklish. Oh.

“No,” he murmurs, and just breathes you in. “I came here once—the night before I graduated highschool. And I told myself when I really really loved someone I’d take them here with me.” He sways with you in his grasp, a gentle and song-less dance.

You grip his shoulder tighter in your hand and lean into him.

“That’s— awfully romantic, huh?” Your voice is quiet. Almost nervous. He just makes a noise of agreement.

“So here we are.” His voice is the opposite of yours, all strong and confident.

You two just move together for a moment. The sun breaks through the tree canopy, shining bright orange down onto the glassy surface of the pond. Crickets and frogs chirp back and forth as the willow vines swing in a cool evening breeze. You watch nature come alive around you, suddenly grateful for the man in your arms.

“Don’t propose,” you whisper, breaking the gentle tension. A laugh breaks the silence and he’s pulling away to look at you. Maybe in disbelief. A strand of hair falls into his eyes and you brush it away, fingers stilling on his temple and sliding down onto his cheek. Stubble scrapes against the skin of your palm and he stares at you through those meadow eyes.

You realize in that moment that he is exactly himself. Of course he is. He’s Sapnap, and everything that encompasses that. Dark and light and fiery and cool. He always has been, and always will be.

You realize you wouldn’t mind if he proposed.

-

A/N: ask or send me some stuff!! requests, rants, anything. let me know what you think

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s half Demon, and they look AWFULLY familiar...

‘Kay guys, I got a different kind of stupid Headcanon to throw at you. Get ready!

Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Part 2.5 Group Retreat Lessons 10-12 Lessons 13-15 Part 3 Part 4

*ahem* picture if you will, it’s the day the exchange program is set to start. The student council (nix Mr. Kill All Humans, Weeb-supreme, and our Scummy Sweetheart) have assembled to welcome the new human student. All is going according to schedule, the portal opens up at eight am sharp, they hear the pitiful screams of the selected human who was not given a heads up about the whole thing, and the poor little human falls straight onto the marble floor.

There’s something a tad... off about this human don’t you think? After they’ve peeled their sorry ass off the floor they observed the assembled student council with an air of sophistication and self importance that no one expected. Their posture was perfect, their eyes sharp and calculating... they bared a striking resemblance to-

“Lucifer,” Diavolo looked to his right hand man, then back to the human. “The human kind of looks like you!”

And out popped four pitch black wings from the human’s back and two small horns out of the sides of their head, one horn was a bit bigger than the other. They even still had some of their down feathers! How cute!

((Content warning: Swearing (I have a potty mouth, forgive me), but that’s it.))

Luci-dad

So, the MC is Lucifer’s kid! Of course Mr. Prideypants immediately tries to recall exactly what little romp in the human world uh... spawned this half-human half-demon child of his. Good thing MC’s got the other parent on speed-dial.

“Please note, MC,” Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose upon hearing Asmo take even more pictures of his newly discovered hellspawn. “I was not aware of your existence, if I was I’d-”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not upset.”

Lucifer blinked a few times in surprise. “P...pardon? You aren’t upset?”

“No, my parent told me that my father was a high ranking demon, and they bare no ill will against you. Though, I am looking forward to this whole... exchange program thing.”

Oh wow, that was easier than Lucifer thought. Damn. Well, he was a father... (let’s be real, he’s been parenting his brothers for thousands of years, and a good chunk of you sinners call him daddy)

MC is probably the most protected student at RAD, despite the fact that they have no visible security detail whatsoever. They didn’t want to be seen as... weak and pathetic.

Something about this human just... set the lesser demons on edge. Any talk of eating them was stamped out on the first day when they walked by. It’s like Lucifer himself was staring at them, daring the demons to try and bother the human. MC’s powerful presence kept them protected and feared.

...at least until dear uncle Asmo decided to do their hair one morning. All those ribbons may have looked adorable but they kind of ruined the intimidation factor.

MC loved to mess with the other students, keeping their lineage a secret for the first little while just made it so much funnier when the other demons tried to scramble out of MC’s way without looking like they were running from the ‘weak little human exchange student’.

Oh wow, what a sadist. Like father like child

Flying lessons are a must. Poor MC isn’t terribly good at controlling their wings, and their horns are still growing in so when they pop into their demon form the first thing they get is a sore skull. Ow... it sucks that Lucifer isn’t outwardly very sympathetic.

“Ow!” MC crashed face first into the grass in the backyard of the House of Lamentation. “Father! My wings are cramping! Can’t we practice this tomorrow?”

The sight of seeing his dear child crash face first into the ground had lost its hilarity after the first three times. Lucifer slowly lowered himself to the ground and crossed his arms as he stood over his incredibly grass-stained kid.

“MC, we’ve been ‘practicing this tomorrow’ for the past month. If you want to learn to fly you’re going to have to actually manage to stay in the air for more than three minutes.”

MC shot Lucifer a withering glare that only preteens were capable of, Lucifer matched it with his own much more sophisticated glare.

“You’ve been flying for over a thousand years! Don’t you have any tips that can actually help other than ‘don’t panic, you’ll look ridiculous’?”

Lucifer dragged a gloved hand down his face and looked around, the two were alone as far as he could see.

“MC,” Lucifer began. “When I was a young angel, I needed to learn how to fly with someone else.”

MC perked up. “Who?”

“Michael. The smug bastard picked up flying quicker than I did.”

“What’d you do?!”

Lucifer smiled at his child’s intense investment. “I practiced flying every day for five extra hours until I could do everything that Michael could do, just better.”

MC’s starry eyed interest died almost instantly upon hearing about the extra five hours of practice. “Humph, I bet I could outfly younger you and Michael with only two hours of practice a day.”

“Really now?”

“Yes! Watch!” MC shook off their wings and took off in a running start before shakily making it into the air. Their form was decent enough, and they weren’t shaking as much as the previous attempts. “SEE?!”

“Yes MC,” Lucifer smiled. “I can see.”

You know what else Lucifer could see? MC crashing right into a tree.

“Ouch...”

Okay... maybe they could halt practice a little early and order a treat from Madame Scream’s. A little sugar to refuel is needed when the end goal is crushing a mutual rival beneath their heels. Just some good old fashioned father/child bonding time!

MC has a smaller seat right next to Lucifer’s seat in the Assembly Hall. I will not compromise on this one.

For all your fluff needs, I give you: Lucifer teaching MC how to play the piano. He has a proud little smile on his face when his kid finally starts getting it. That’s all. Enjoy the image.

That one Uncle who gives you Alcohol at Family Gatherings (Mammon)

Yeah, when Mammon burst in late to the party and whining about everyone’s spamming him with texts to haul his scummy ass to the Assembly Hall, the last thing he expected was to see a mini-Lucifer.

“What the fuck am I lookin’ at?!”

The glare the two Lucifers gave the poor Avatar of Greed was enough to make him want to turn tail (uh, wing) and book it down the hall.

“Mammon, this is MC. They’re my child.”

“Hello.”

“...whaaaa..?” Mammon looked between the two, same glare, same intimidating aura, same annoyingly good posture.

Mammon scratched the back of his neck and looked over at his older brother. “Do I uh... still gotta babysit em’ if they’re not human?”

“The lake of Cocytus will melt the day I let you babysit without supervision.” Lucifer grumbled.

“I don’t need a babysitter!”

Despite Lucifer’s initial denial, Mammon and MC ended up spending a lot of time hanging out when Lucifer was busy with paperwork. Of course Mammon’s first thought was ‘how do I profit off this situation?’

MC is now Mammon’s designated babysitter after they caught him picking up their feathers that had fallen off with the intention of painting them white and claiming they were Lucifer’s from back in the Celestial Realm.

Mammon does end up spoiling MC a little. Just a smidge. They’re the kid of his totally not his favourite brother after all! How could he not? Whether or not these gifts are obtained legally or are legal at all is subject to scrutiny.

“Mammon, I can’t drink this!” MC placed the bottle of Demonus back on the counter of the kitchen.

“Why not? That’s a bottle of the good stuff! We gotta celebrate you gettin’ an A on that test somehow!”

“I’m underage! Incredibly underage. I’m not legally allowed to drink.”

Mammon wordlessly plopped a silly straw into the bottle. “...does that help?”

“No.” MC then inclined their head to the bottle. “And I don’t want to get hung from the ceiling, that bottle was in my father’s study yesterday, I’m above theft.”

“How old are you s’posed to be anyway? Never mind... uh...” Mammon wracked his brain for something else he could do for MC that didn’t cost anything (don’t judge him, the poor bastard was flat broke!). “I could... teach you to drive!”

“Driving?”

“Yeah! Drivin’ is awesome! We can take my car!”

The bills for the damages done to the car and the Devildom were mailed to Lucifer the next day, and MC and Mammon got to keep each other company as they hung from the ceiling. Ah well! At least MC wasn’t upside down!

Mammon wasn’t that good of a flight teacher either, he also crashed into a tree (the same tree MC crashed into, actually) when he was cheering for MC. They were finally able to do a loopdy loop! He was proud and distracted! Okay?! Lucifer! Stop smirkin’ at him! It’s not that funny!

At least the vantage point from the tree was decent and the branches didn’t scratch him up too badly. Oh hey... that person walking by was wearing a very nice watch... he’d be right back-

That Uncle That is Always Absent From Family Gatherings and When He is Present He Leaves Early (Levi)

He missed everything. That is not an exaggeration. He was in the middle of an online raid battle and couldn’t look at his phone! No Lucifer he can’t pause an online game! That’s not how it works!

Okay, the human exchange student is half demon? WOAH! THAT’S JUST LIKE THAT ONE ANIME- W A I T. THE LITTLE NORMIE IS LUCIFER’S KID?!

Okie doke, he was fully convinced that MC just had to be an anime protagonist.

They binged every series that Levi compared them to. Sure MC might have missed a few assignments because of late night anime binges, but they were too good for this school crap anyway, right?

Nope. Lucifer put a ban on the two watching anime until both their grades improved. Surviving that hell brought the two together.

“Ugh!”

The sound of a pencil case being haphazardly thrown across the room made Levi peek out of his bed-tub. If his figurines got knocked over so HELP HIM-

“This is stupid!!I shouldn’t have to catch up with this!” MC crossed their arms and gave their Demonology textbook their best disapproving glare.

Lucifer Lite (tm) was having a hell of a time trying to claw through their missed work, and Levi sympathized, he really did, it’s just... he was playing Animal Crossing-

Levi paused the game to placate his anime-buddy when their wings popped out and he feared for his rare merch’s safety.

“H-hey, MC? Do you need help?” Levi’s offer was met with a bone chilling glare that lived rent free in his nightmares ever since. He had pulled a Mammon and forgotten he was talking to Lucifer’s child. Lucifer’s allergy to help must have passed down to MC.

“No! I don’t! It’s just... dumb!” MC hissed, she turned and looked over at the fish tank. “Right Henry 2.0?”

Henry 2.0 did not respond.

“MC, you need to finish your homework or we can’t watch anything together,” Levi sighed, he had finished his work over an hour earlier. He had mastered the art of all night anime binges and managing to do most of his work in the fifteen minutes between the time he woke up and the time school was supposed to begin. “We haven’t even binged all of volume 4 of TSL yet!”

“Mmm...” MC grumbled. “Fine...”

MC picked up their pencil case and began continued their work. Levi breathed a sigh of relief and went back to Animal Crossing.

The tiny normie did in fact finish their work, only after they caved and asked Levi for help. Swore him to secrecy, they did... very intimidating, they were.

Just saying, he most definitely sent that one Keanu Reeves meme with big Keanu and little Keanu but with Lucifer and MC to the wrong group chat. Poor bastard.

Flying lessons? No. Levi hadn’t flown since his time in the Celestial Realm, he had no advice to give other than: “Flap your wings!”

“THAT’S WHAT I’M DOING YOU-”

MC didn’t get to finish that thought, they lost their balance and fell right into RAD’s fountain. Ah well, Levi had a head start on running for his life that he squandered by laughing at MC. RIP.

The Uncle/brother/whatever the fuck that Starts a Fight With Your Dad at the Family Reunion. (Satan)

Oh... another Lucifer? Eugh. Gross.

Satan gave the kid a wide berth when they first met. Everything the kid said or did ticked him off. “Tsk. Look at MC. Making an omelette. So annoying.” “Oh wow, MC vacuumed? Roll out the red carpet, we need to celebrate their existence!” “Look at them. Breathing. Disgusting.”

MC’s pride wouldn’t ever let them admit it but... they knew Satan didn’t like them, and it hurt their feelings.

“Shhhh,” Satan whispered into his backpack.

“Meow.” The backpack replied.

“I said shhhhh.”

The backpack did not reply after that, which was a good thing considering the little princet of the HOL was nearby.

“Satan?” They asked. “Who are you talking to?”

Satan coldly brushed past them as he made his way to his room. “No one you need to concern yourself with.”

When the little calico kitten was safe in his room, Satan quickly realized a mistake in his foolproof ‘sneak a cat into the house’ plan. He didn’t have any toys for the kitten, and he didn’t want his books getting scratched...

It was alright, he’d just rush out to the a store that sold cat things and rush back! Five minute trip tops!

Well when Satan got back the cat was no longer in the room. Oh dear. He discreetly tore apart the house looking for the poor little thing until he ended up finding it in the library, happily chasing around a loose feather being held up by MC.

“Oh, hello Satan.” MC chirped as the kitten batted it’s adorable little paws at the feather.

“My... my door was closed. Did you let the cat out?”

MC shrugged. “I heard meowing.”

Satan ran a hand through his hair and grumbled. Stupid smaller Lucifer. Stupid original Lucifer. Everyone sucked.

“Let me guess, you’re going to run to Lucifer and tell him all about the meowing and the rule breaking.”

MC shook their head and glared at Satan. “Of course not. I’ve already gotten way too attached to this little guy anyway. We’re co-parenting this kitten like mature adults.”

With some coaxing, Satan did sit down and play with the kitten, maybe MC wasn’t... so terrible.

The two watch Unsolved Mysteries together, that’s their show. “This guy did it.” “Satan, we’re two minutes into the episode-” “Trust me.”

Thirty minutes later.

“He did it.” “See MC, what’d I tell you?”

Lucifer did find out about the cat, but with enough pleading, MC and Satan managed to warm up the cold spot in Lucifer’s chest where his heart should have been. The cat’s name is Detective Toe Beans (or just Bean).

Satan can’t fly, he has a tail, but he did read up on wing anatomy and how flight actually works in demons, his advice would be good in theory, but it’s full of so much technical jargon that MC can’t understand it.

At least MC didn’t crash into something, they barrel rolled through one of the HOL’s windows. Good thing it was the window to their room. The broken arm still hurt like hell.

The Best Dressed Bitch Who Brings The Booze to The Reunion. (Asmo)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Lucifer’s kid was SO CUTE! A thousand pictures commemorating that adorable moment needed to be taken! Wait- Lucifer- GIVE BACK THE PHONE-

Asmo, surprise surprise, absolutely adores little MC! So cute! So small! He was just so excited to announce to all his Devilgram followers that Lucifer was finally a certified DILF.

That post disappeared five minutes after it was made but the damage had already been done.

Asmo made sure MC looked their best at all times, if they needed help talking to anyone? Asmo’s got their back!

Sure, maybe he’s a little pushy, but pushy’s a good thing sometimes, right?

“Asmodeus-”

“No, these shoes wouldn’t fit you...”

“Asmo-”

“No, not these ones either...”

“ASMODEUS.”

Asmo squeaked and jumped upwards, Geez Louise... little MC’s voice could sure be scary when they wanted it to be...

“I don’t need any fancy new shoes.” MC huffed, sitting up straighter in one of the chairs in Asmo’s room. “I thought this was supposed to be a sleepover.”

“Hmmm...” Asmo pouted. “Makeovers are an essential part of sleepovers... what’d you do with your human friends up in the human world that could possibly be better than a make-over?!”

MC began to list things off. “Ordered junk food, talked about people we hated, watched movies,”

“Greasy food is so bad for your skin...” Asmo cringed and shook his head violently. “But I’m totally down to watch a movie and bitch about people I hate!”

“Ah yes, human sleepovers, a tradition I never quite had the chance to enjoy.” Solomon said from Asmo’s bed. “Who are we bitching about?”

“Remind me what Solomon is doing here.” MC muttered as they sat down in front of Asmo’s TV.

“Because, I wanted to hang out with my two favourite humans.” Asmo cooed, reaching over and trying to pinch MC’s cheek, which they awkwardly dodged.

“Can we watch The Exorcist?” Solomon asked, propping his head up with his hands.

“Ew, no.” Asmo made a face at him. “That scene with the vomit? Hell NO.”

“Mm.” MC mumbled. Asmo turned to look at them.

“MC? Are you doing okay? You don’t look like you’re having any fun...”

“I’m fine.” MC grumbled.

Asmo pursed his lips, as much as it made his little narcissistic heart break, he nudged MC. “Why don’t you pick the movie, sweetie. I’m sure Solomon and I will like anything you pick!”

MC noticeably brightened. “Let’s watch Scream!”

The strangled noise that came from Asmo was... concerning, but to his credit, The Avatar of Lust held his tongue about his distaste for the movie, and the three slumber-party goers had quite the lovely time.

After the movie ended, MC went back to their room, sure it was a sleepover but their bed was right down the hall.

Good for Asmo and Solomon. Horny fuckers. We stan.

Asmo just claps and tries to cheer MC on when it comes to their flying lessons. (The idea that Asmo came up with to wear his cheerleader costume from the previous Halloween was immediately shot down by Lucifer)

“You’re doing wonderful, MC- WATCH OUT FOR THE POWER LINE!”

MC didn’t hit the power line, but Asmo’s scream of terror caused them to fall butt-first into a dumpster. Their injured tailbone served as a tragic memory of the incident.

Oh well, good thing Asmo had nice smelling soap to give that could mask dumpster-stink.

The Uncle that eats everything and tells you to eat your veggies while you angrily pick at your broccoli at the kid’s table. (Beel)

Lucifer... has a kid?! Beel choked on the cheetos he had snuck into the Assembly Hall when the kid’s wings popped out.

Oh wow, that’s nice :) maybe they can eat together. Belphie would probably like them.

Wait what is the gender neutral term for Niece or Nephew?

...Nibling? Uh... let’s not say that around Beel. We don’t need him to get hungrier and begin associating MC with nibbling on things.

The Underground Tomb incident probably went a little differently, but after all that nonsense, the two are closer than two peas in a pod!

Mmm... peas...

“Beel?” MC stepped into the Avatar of Gluttony’s room.

“Hi MC.” Beel was doing push-ups in the middle of the room, on the ground right beneath his head was a massive bowl of spaghetti that he bit into every time he completed a push-up. “Can you come stand on my back? I need the extra weight.”

“On your back?” MC padded closer. “Are you sure? It’s not going to hurt?”

“No, it’ll be okay.” Beel assured them. “Belphie and I did this all the time. Except Belphie is normally asleep.”

MC tentatively stepped onto Beel’s back. It was a balancing act to say the least, they eventually gave up on standing and ended up sitting cross legged between Beel’s shoulder blades.

“You did this with Belphegor?” MC asked.

“Yeah,” Beel sighed. “He was always too tired to exercise, but he’d let me bench press him sometimes...”

MC frowned and hugged their knees to their chest. Knowing full well that Beel’s twin wasn’t in the human world like Lucifer said was absolutely ripping them apart from the inside. Guilt felt just as rotten as their pride did when they were being belittled...

“Maybe you’ll see him again sometime soon.” MC whispered. “Maybe my father’ll come to his senses and let him come back down to the Devildom.”

Beel paused his push-ups for a brief moment, then nodded and went back to his eating exercising combo. “I hope so. He’ll like you, MC. I’m sure of it.”

MC nodded. “I... hope so.”

Beel’s a pretty decent flight teacher, but his wings are just so different from MC’s that it renders any tips he had next to useless.

“MC, maybe your wings aren’t flapping fast enough.”

“Beel, I appreciate the thought, but I’m not a hummingbird. Or a fly. I don’t need to flap my wings a million times a minute to stay afloat.”

Ah well, MC tried to take some of Beel’s advice, but their lower right wing cramped up and they ended up flying in circles until Beel was able to catch them. Ah well, better than the dumpster incident the previous week.

The Uncle That Passes Out in The Basement and You’re Not Allowed to Wake Him Up Even Though All Your Toys and Video Games Are Down There. He Also Picks a Fight With Your Dad’s New S/O Before He Passes Out. (Belphie)

Sitting in the attic was quite a drag, and this supposedly weak little human was quite the annoyance to try and call out to. It took a lot longer than expected, but when he heard little footsteps coming towards his prison, Belphegor nearly jumped with joy.

Oh... it... looked like Lucifer. Smelled like Lucifer. Stood like Lucifer. Quacked like Lucifer. Or... trilled..? Whatever sound a peacock made, this brat sounded an awful lot like Lucifer.

A... half-demon. Hmph. Belphie honestly thought Lucifer had actual standards. Not anymore, he guessed.

(Man I could fill a whole-ass fic with the Belphie betrayal thing, but for now let’s skip to post attic nonsense)

Okay so maybe MC wasn’t disgusting. They made a good nap buddy. It was cute when their wings came out when they were sleeping sometimes. Well... it was cute when they didn’t hit him in the face and make him wake up with his mouth full of feathers.

What Beel said had been true, Belphie made a good substitute when weights weren’t available, but Beel didn’t want MC to feel left out, so Belphie and MC ended up sitting on his back while he did push ups. MC once got bored and started playing Go Fish with Belphie on Beel’s back while he exercised.

Yes. MC is still a member of the Formerly-Anti-Lucifer League.

“Are you sure he’s not going to be too mad at us?” MC asked for the dozenth time that day. Detective Toe Beans was wrapped around their neck like a scarf (he had gotten so big!!!) while MC nervously sat in one of the Library chairs.

“Positive.” Belphie said with a toothy grin. “Besides, he’s like putty when it comes to you. Just give him your best puppy eyes and we’re not guilty on all charges.”

Putty..? Really..? Lucifer..? How strict was he before MC got there... they wondered.

“Sh! He’s coming!” Satan stuck his nose into a random book, it was the Oxford English Dictionary... and it was upside down.

Belphie pretended to pass out and MC decided that the best course of action was to stare deeply into their cat’s eyes. Yeah... that looked casual and not weird.

“Satan, MC, Belphie.” Lucifer nodded to the three of them as he walked towards the entrance to his study.

“Lucifer.”

“Afternoon, father.”

Belphie let out a cartoonishly loud fake snore that nearly caused both MC and Satan to break cover and start laughing.

Side note, Bean had adorable widdle eyes! That cute little face was just to die for-

“You three..!”

Belphie, Satan, and MC peeked their heads into Lucifer’s study, their handiwork was perfect. Everything was covered in red post it notes. Perfectly not harmful, but SO inconvenient!

“You’re all cleaning this up or so help me-”

“GO!” Belphie and Satan each grabbed one of MC’s arms (Satan also grabbed Bean) and sprinted out of the House of Lamentation. Maybe they’d move back there in twenty years... they hoped that Solomon and The Angels would let them crash at Purgatory Hall...

Belphie had used up his physical energy supply for the next four years. He passed out the moment they stepped into sanctuary. Time for a nap...

Flight practice? Ha. Belphie’s napping. Though, he was suspiciously awake and filming whenever MC did something stupid.

“Try not to suck so bad.”

“GO TO HELL BELPHIE!”

“I’m already there. Hell is every second I’m stuck here watching you fail.”

“YOU’RE GOING TO GET IT FOR THAT!”

Well... MC mastered the dive bomb that day. Lucifer bought them a cake.

Bonus! Your Dad’s New Husband! That Has Managed to Somehow Make Everyone Hate Him Despite the Fact That He’s A Cinnamon Roll. (Diavolo)

A mini Lucifer? A mini Lucifer!

Diavolo dotes on MC like he’d dote on his own kid. MC wants a crown? They’re getting a crown! A damn nice one too! MC wants a title? Here! MC is now... idk Ruler of the area between Majolish and Hell’s Kitchen.

Poor Uncle Mammon’s got some financial insecurity, he’s still the cool uncle... right?!

He is very much that ‘how do you do fellow kids?’ Meme.

He tries to do stereotypical ‘dad’ things but he’s not very good at them. Once he tried to host a barbecue...

Barbatos saved the day, but Mammon’s hair was still singed, Solomon’s cooking still gave Beel food poisoning (SOLOMON EATS TOXIC WASTE I SWEAR-), Luke still got hit in the face with a frisbee, and Simeon got an unhealthy dose of DAD NERVES and got so stressed everyone was almost blinded by the holy light he suddenly started blasting. We do not mention the water guns.

(Seriously whose bright idea was it to give Belphie and Satan water guns while they were in Lucifer’s presence?)

Praise Barbie. He’s too good for them.

“Um...” MC awkwardly held up the baseball, trying to look at it from all angles like it was a completely alien object. “Lord Diavolo... are you sure you want to play catch?”

Diavolo clapped his hands and bounced on the balls of his feet. “Yes! It’s a thing human fathers do with their children, correct? We must make up for lost time between you and Lucifer, right?”

Lucifer massaged his temples and nodded. “If you two would like to play catch...” Lucifer grimaced. “I will too.”

“Okay! MC, throw the ball to Lucifer!” Diavolo instructed.

Lucifer half heartedly held up his baseball glove as MC tossed him the ball. He caught it, and looked over at Diavolo, who was applauding like he just witnessed the greatest feat in sports history.

“Okay! Throw it to me!” Diavolo waved his glove in the air, Lucifer rolled his eyes and smiled. He threw the ball at Diavolo with... a lot of force. Enough force to probably dent steel... Diavolo caught it like it was nothing.

MC suddenly feared for their safety.

“Okay MC, catch!”

Diavolo threw the ball with enough force to break the god damn sound barrier. Well, maybe that was an exaggeration, but the ball sailed way over MC’s head and crashed right through a window.

“Oh my...” Diavolo put a hand on his hip and surveyed the damage to the window. “This isn’t so bad, I believe in human world TV shows this happens quite often. Look! The glass broke in a perfect circle!”

“Yay... property damage...” MC murmured.

Lucifer sighed and pulled out his DDD. “I’ll phone someone to replace the win-”

“Lucifer no! Now according to human world customs we must,” Diavolo took a deep breath, rushed forward, grabbed both Lucifer and MC’s hands and started sprinting away from the Demon Lord’s Castle. “RUN FOR IT!”

“Di- Diavolo!” Lucifer gasped.

“Who are we running from?! That’s your castle!” MC squeaked.

“I don’t know! Just run! That’s what the human TV show says to do!”

Weirdly enough, Diavolo was the best flight instructor. MC’s ability to fly increased tenfold after Diavolo found out that MC was learning to fly.

“You’re doing amazing MC! That was a perfect turn!”

“Thanks Lord Diavolo, I’m surprised I haven’t crashed into anyone or fallen yet!”

“Well, I highly doubt you’ll be crashing into anyone anymore, your flying is practically perfect now!”

Mammon proceeded to fly past them holding what looked like Lucifer’s wallet.

“M-mammon?!”

“Oh... I wonder what he’s doing. Look, MC! It’s Lucifer! Hello Lucifer dea-”

Lucifer ended up colliding with the two of them and sending them all crashing to the floor.

That was the last time MC fell during flying practice.

(We currently have a Go Fund Me set up for Mammon to get the funds necessary to flee the Devildom after that incident. Please donate to save- oh shit hi Lucifer-)

[rottingsparrow]

Part 4! Of rereading Lore Olympus. Ep 31-40

Gotta be real I keep forgetting to post these even tho I'm reading them but it's fine. Obviously I won't finish before the end of the 2 week break (this Saturday) but after this I may start reviewing episodes as they come out, who knows. Last part:

Ep 31

Theres so many other reasons you shouldnt work together but ok

Also shes literally so smart right like thats canon

Artemis is cool hera,,,sometimes

Which two sons i wish i knew the lo family tree as opposed to the real one yknow

How do heras powers work she felt her pain but doesnt know who??

I would kill for a comprehensive list of family tree and powers, dont even have to spoil powers just please i get so confused

Ep 32

Train ur fuckin dogs hades i think ive said that before

He changed skin color again but like not just light vs dark thats a whole diff shade of blue

Hehe threaten low class workers so cute and quirky hades

Why is uh psyche/whatever her nymph name is wearing more traditional clothes while not in the mortal realm

Love the dog

Hades has a point, even tho it makes no sense for him to have said that

Ok also point out in the like future episode he wants persephone to call him Aidoneus but doesnt like when others do it why

Thats my same thing with him calling her Kore like i know in the future its like explained or whatever but idk

Aphrodite has a point it was a favor in a way

A dumb way but yknow

I remember everyone losing it over the “im only interested in the dead ones” panel but looking at it its so lame LMAO changed his entire face shape for a panel

Ep 33

HECATE HECATE WOOOO

Im but a simple man

Hades texts like an old man i know he is one but

Also i am dying to know how his business works including as the god of the underworld like. Give me something

Then again, maybe i am a lil dumb when it comes to this

I always thought he was giving the little elevator friend a sugarcube lmao

I like how minthes ears react to her emotions

Stop fighting at work omg this would be the worst place to work at

“Hey can u do ur job”

Ep 34

Why this subplot ugh

The crown floats yet is sideways after she hits him

Also haha hitting

Also their relationship does confuse me just a tad bit yknow

All the clues were there hades you dumbass

“Cancel all my meetings” DO YOUR JOB

“This doesnt affect you in the same way” cause hes a man or a king or both but also kings seemed to get treated the same by their subjects until they are dicks and excute their power

From what ive seen

Then again we havent seen poseidon do that but that brings me to the point of I wanna see poseidon realm

thats . so creepy hades ew

“Smth must be done about this” like fair legal action right?....right?

Who reads newspapers these days anyways wait a second

Ep 35

See the laptop having news makes more sense like sure we make newspapers but ppl dont use em as often

“Biochemistry Theory” fun fact I switched majors to specifically avoid taking chemistry

What are they typing he just started speaking

What type of nymph is thetis bc i know minthe is a river nymph but thetis has fancy ears

They are so mean to each other lmao

The financial situation and the fact that they both are like sleeping with the kings confuse me why do both of them do it.

Like retrospectively i understand it but when i first read it i was like “are nymphs supposed to be like hookers??” so i was lost for a bit

“Hades micromanages computer usage” oh what a shit boss

Also the meal ticket she has a job sure hades gave it to her but

Idk maybe im slow

What an awful way to do a heart shape i just tried it wtf

“Crying is for wives” damn

Yes body issues that dont get brought up again right? Like she all of a sudden gets bigger boobs and i dont think hades pays ppl enough for cosmetic surgery

You guys know this is a work setting

Has rachel ever had a job bc this feels like a comical trope seen on tv the workplace drama yknow

LMAO IN THE LAST PANEL RACHEL FORGOT TO GIVE HER NYMPH EARS

Like fully normal ears i know its a mistake but its funny

Ep 36

“Not my circus not my monkeys” queen

Hades is it not your circus how dont involve hecate in this

“Stop starin at me with them big ol eyes”

Oof that does not look good on you, i mean why didnt you give her the coat

“I thought you didnt get jealous” ok she may have said that but literally everything about her contradicts that

And i love this part bc he doesnt call her crazy and they talk, i mean he hides some of the truth which like fuck him, and then they try to talk about the party and

Ugh i know minthe is supposed to be an antagonist but rachel does this weird thing where she tries to flesh her out, then realizes it would be an easy set up for a redemption arc and screws her over again

I know the ppl in the mortal realm are generally frightened of hades but why are ppl in olympus

“I wouldnt expect anything less from a goddess” so we are going to bring in the racism/speciesism that occurs in this story right

Its the middle of the day isnt he supposed to be in the mortal realm moving the sun or some shit

Ep 37

“Last night” Rachel its ok to space things out sweetie

Ok ok so one thing i hate about her characterization of apollo is he goes from being delusional to knowing what he did was at least slightly wrong and i hate both are fine stories but pick one he either is so infatuated with persephone that he thinks that they had a great time or he wants her for her power

And! A transition from one to the other would be fine, but she goes back in forth in his characterization

Little red vines look cool

Hehe cerberus

How did he escape tho

I love that dog

Ep 38

Oh its the greenhouse again

But this time it represents the evil feeling?

Idk but i like eye symbolism im lame lol

Why was she sleeping in the chair

When did she get those clothes i dunno if eros would buy her business casual

Artemis really sees all the signs and then goes “meh”

Like points out the possible crush on persephone just connect the dots they are so close

Why is there not more than one door

Why is no one getting off

How does rachel think train stops work

Ep 39

Also not thatanos with an undercut lmao

Ope its thanatos i mixed it up

Also minthe you just actively arent doing a good job like lmao how are you not getting fired

Hades smoking a cigar is so old and gross tbh

What an awful boss

That man has a point dont stand infront of the door

She gave her a little flower nice

Minthe i know ur being spiteful, weird bc hades explained shes just the daughter of a friend( i know its a lie but still) but just do your job

“It says restricted access but that lady says it was fine” i would just wait until someone came out theres no reason to go inside

Ep 40

Why would they not have a lock on this place actually

Why wouldnt she just leave the way she came

When did hades put on his glasses

How is it hades fault what

So many questions yknow for such a short episode

Also does this place not have security cameras in places that are tartarus

[5raysofsunshine]

In the Kitchen with Penelope - Emily Prentiss x Penelope Garcia

Hi friends! Who wants to read about Emily and Penelope baking together (and flirting and being a tad bit chaotic)?! This takes place around the beginning of Emily being there, like mid-late s2. They be developing crushes on each other!

Written for @sweetprentiss 's birthday bingo: Cooking or Baking Together

Rating: G

Word count: 2065

Tagging @ssaagentemilyprentiss @dalexandriag16 @its-soph-xx @143bc (if you want to be tagged in future fics lmk!)

Enjoy! 💖

---

“Emily.” Penelope says, staring at the so-called ingredients Emily had said she bought for the cake they were going to make.

“Yeah?” Emily asks, already knowing that Penelope is disappointed with what she sees.

Penelope gestures towards the kitchen island counter, “That is a cake in a box.”

“Yup!” Emily said confidently. Sitting on top of Emily’s kitchen island is a small blue rectangular box with a stylized photo of a perfectly baked yellow cake with chocolate frosting and a cartoon mascot smiling widely. The ingredients and instructions for the premade cake mix are printed on the back of the box in simple wording with small illustrations to show the steps visually.

Penelope rolls her eyes, “You told me you had cake ingredients!”

“I do! All the dry ingredients are already mixed together and then it calls for water, eggs, and vegetable oil! Which I have!” Emily argues back.

Penelope shakes her head back and forth, “No, no, no! Emily, I came over here because you said you wanted my help making a cake, and THIS is what you need help with? Are you telling me you can’t follow simple back-of-the-box instructions?”

“I don’t want to screw it up! You’ll help me not screw it up!” Emily pleads.

Sure, Emily can bake the cake pretty easily, if she pays attention to measurements and doesn’t forget that she already added something, and if she doesn’t forget to set a timer for the oven. This is why Emily invited Penelope over. The blonde had offered to help Emily if she ever wanted to bake something, since Penelope often bakes sweet treats for the team on holidays and when she hosts little get togethers at her apartment. And to be perfectly honest, Emily would use any excuse she could to spend some quality time with her new friend.

“Emily, how the hell can you-” Penelope begins to ask, but Emily interrupts.

“You must think very highly of me, because I can assure you that I will absolutely mess this up somehow if I tried making this by myself.” It’s true, she could and most likely would if Penelope wasn’t here.

Penelope sighs, “I actually do think very highly of you, Emily. Always have... but now I’m starting to think I shouldn’t.”

“Oh come on, PG!” Emily exclaims. “I’ve always struggled with baking. And cooking, for that matter. I am useless in the kitchen, and it’s literally so... embarrassing.”

“Well... don’t worry, my sweet. A badass intelligent sexy woman like yourself doesn't need to be skilled in the kitchen as long as you’re skilled in... other areas.”

“Ha, tell that to my exes.”

“Oh screw them, they probably didn’t deserve you anyway.”

“Aw, thanks.”

Penelope sighs deeply, grabbing the box of cake mix and putting it away in one of Emily’s cabinets. “Okay, screw this cake mix. Emily Prentiss, I’m going to teach you how to make a cake from scratch!”

“Really?” Emily asks, already doubtful about how well this will go.

“Yes!” Penelope says confidently, “As long as you have all of the ingredients we’ll need.”

“Like what?”

“Well, what goes into a cake?” Penelope asks, quizzing Emily to see if she at least knows the basic ingredients.

Emily taps her chin as she hums in thought. “Hmm... well we still need water, vegetable oil, and eggs, right?” Penelope nods, gesturing for Emily to continue. “Pretty sure we’re gonna need flour, sugar, butter, and... frosting? I bought lots of frosting!”

Admiring how cute the brunette is when she gets excited about the fact that she has plenty of frosting, Penelope smiles and her bottom lip pouts just a little. “Okay, those are very basic cake ingredients. But we’ll also need baking powder, baking soda, some salt, and vanilla extract. Do you have those things?”

Emily nods, “Um, I think so.”

Penelope grins and claps her hands together, “I’m going to search your kitchen.”

---

“So, how come you struggle with baking?” Penelope asks as she cracks a couple eggs and dumps the insides into a large mixing bowl.

Emily shrugs, plugging in an electric hand mixer in preparation to mix the cake ingredients together. “I never really learned how. You know, usually a kid is taught how to cook or bake by their mom or their grandma. But, I never had that opportunity.”

Penelope frowns. “Why is that?” She suspects it’s because of how Emily grew up. Living in foreign countries and not being well connected with family. But she still asks, because she genuinely wants to learn more about her new friend, despite knowing the basics of Emily’s life through the personal research she did when the brunette agent first arrived at the BAU.

Two beater attachments click into place before Emily responds, “See, my mother wasn’t much of a kitchen person, and I must admit I was pretty spoiled with private chefs while growing up. Even when I was living on my own in my university days, I could barely make a decent meal for myself. I mostly lived on food that was served at the restaurant I worked at.” Penelope nods, remembering that Emily had once mentioned she was a waitress when she was going to college. Whether that was undergrad or grad school, she’s not sure. Emily continues, “I try to follow recipes, but I somehow always forget something. Whether it’s an ingredient or I leave it in the oven for too long, or I didn’t use the right amount of flour-”

Penelope’s palm lands on top of Emily’s hand that is resting on the counter. “Well, you don’t have to worry about that now, my sweet. Not while I’m here.”

Emily smiles at Penelope’s words and removes her hand, only to place it on top of Penelope’s in return. “Thanks.” She says, gazing into Penelope’s brown eyes with her own. “I really appreciate it.”

Penelope grins and removes her hand from underneath Emily’s and places it back on top, patting the back of the brunette’s hand a few times. “I’m happy to be of service. Now, hand over the mixer so we can put this batter in the pans.”

“No way, I wanna mix it!” Emily says with a grin, holding up the hand mixer like a gun and turning it on for a brief second before turning it off again.

“Woah,” Penelope says giggling before stepping back. “Be careful where you point that thing! Put it in the bowl, missy! In. The. Bowl.”

---

“I swear to god Emily if you keep eating the batter there won’t be enough to make the damn cake!” Penelope complains, softly whacking Emily’s hand to stop her from reaching in the mixing bowl for another taste. As soon as Penelope’s hand pulls away, Emily quickly dips her finger into the batter and brings it to her mouth. Penelope scowls, “Emily!”

Emily giggles as she sucks her finger clean, “I’m sorry! It’s just so tasty!” Penelope rolls her eyes, continuing to butter her cake pans. She’s trying hard not to smile, but the corner of her lips begin to betray her. Emily smirks, “I bet it’s so good because you made it with love, huh?”

Penelope purses her lips, “Well, all of my baked goodies are made with love, so this is no exception. It’s also made with uncooked eggs! So stop it! You’re gonna make yourself sick!”

Emily holds the mixing bowl over one of the cake pans, pouring the batter into the round container. “So what? I’ve been through worse than salmonella.”

Penelope frowns, curious as to what Emily meant by that comment. She decides not to ask, despite really wanting to, and instead exclaims, “Emily Prentiss, that is sooo not the point and you know it!” Without thinking too much about it, Penelope brings the spatula she was using to scrape the inside of the bowl and taps Emily’s cheek with it. The batter splatters as it makes contact, leaving droplets on her nose, mouth, and chin as well as her cheek.

Emily’s mouth falls open in shock, immediately bringing her hand up to wipe some of the batter off her cheek. As Penelope cackles, Emily places the mixing bowl down on the counter with a clatter. “Garcia! What the hell!”

Penelope’s laughter subsides into giggles. “I’m sorry but you totally deserved it.”

“I deserve cake batter on my face?”

“Well, since you love eating it so much now you have your own little supply to enjoy while these go in the oven.”

Penelope quickly scrapes the rest of the batter into the second cake pan by herself as Emily swipes her finger across her cheek. Emily stares at the glob of yellow cake batter on the tip of her finger, “I thought you said you wanted me to stop eating the batter.”

“I do. So here, wipe it off.” Penelope tosses Emily a rag, the brunette catching it with one hand.

“But isn’t that a waste of batter?” Emily teases.

“Shut up, you goof. Clean your pretty face.” Penelope teases back.

After Penelope places the two cake pans in the oven, she turns to Emily, who is doing a poor job at removing all of the batter off her face. Penelope shakes her head, “You still have a bit on your cheek.”

“Where?” Emily asks.

Penelope steps closer towards Emily. “There’s a bit on your chin so... here.” She grabs the rag out of Emily’s hands and brings it up to the brunette’s face, gently wiping Emily’s face with the cloth. The women’s eyes lock on each other and they quickly look away, both embarrassed and nervous about being so close together, though neither of them step back. “And...um... here.” Penelope continues, wiping a batter splatter from the corner of Emily’s mouth while trying very hard not to stare at the brunette’s parted lips that look so pretty and soft.

“Am I... um... did you get it all?” Emily asks in a quiet whisper. Penelope’s eyes suddenly widen in surprise, having just returned to reality from daydreaming about what it would be like to kiss her co-worker.

“Yes! Yes, you’re- um... all good! Look at that pretty face!” Penelope says, immediately stepping away from Emily and tossing the dirty dish towel on the counter.

“So, I know you compliment, like, everyone. But I just hope you know how much I appreciate it when you compliment me. I should compliment you more in return.”

“Well, who’s stopping you?” Penelope teases, looking back at Emily with fluttering eyelashes. “Go ahead. I’m all ears.”

“Oh. Um. I-uh...” Emily stutters, heat spreading across her face as she tries to form a coherent thought. “I think you’re really pretty too. Very pretty. And very smart- like, you’re incredibly sharp witted, which really is a big compliment coming from me because I don’t often meet my match. To my wit, that is. Because, you know, I’m... witty, too. I think.”

“You’re really cute when you ramble.”

“Oh. Sorry.” Emily apologizes, the blush finally showing in her cheeks.

“No need to apologize, sugar. You’re totally fine.” Penelope says with a wink.

“How about I open a bottle of wine and we wait in the den till the timer goes off?” Emily suggests.

Penelope gasps, “Trying to get me drunk, Prentiss?”

Emily rolls her eyes playfully, “Red or White?”

“Red. Like that cute shirt you’re wearing.”

Emily chuckles, glancing down at her own shirt. “Oh, thanks! I’ll meet you over there.” The brunette nods her head towards her living room. She watches as Penelope walks out of the kitchen and into Emily’s living room, her chunky heels clunking on the tile before the sound of her steps is muted by the carpet. Emily smiles to herself, admiring how cute the blonde looks even when she’s walking away. Suddenly she shakes her head to rid her brain of an inappropriate thought. She can’t deny that there are several things about her coworker that are extremely attractive: her beauty, her intelligence, her confidence, her charisma. The ability to leave Emily scrambling for words when the blonde opens her mouth and effortlessly flirts.

Now Emily understands what Derek had told her in regards to Penelope, ‘That woman will make you fall in love with her without even trying.’ Because here she is, pouring a glass of wine for the most remarkable woman she has ever met, and falling for Penelope Garcia, just a little.

[amethystpath-writes]

A Lesson Learned

(NOT A PROMPT)

Hello :) Could you write a piece where the extremely flirtatious villain notices that the hero isn’t taking care of themselves and tries to get them to and promises not to do anything (capture them, etc), but (surprise!) then they do? Haha sorry if it’s a bit specific, adore your writing!

******

“Why, doll,” Villain cooed from behind the bench which Hero sat upon. The bench was old, wood in the process of rotting. Speaking of rot- Villain rounded the park bench, coming face to face with that once-handsome, now-perished face. “Don’t you just look like you sprang from Hell? Yeesh.”

Hero shrugged, not even caring that Villain was here to taunt him yet again- to pick at him with compliments. Usually, anyways. Now, she was insulting him. Did he really look that out of it? Hero felt like it, so it shouldn’t have been so surprising to him. “Don’t feel great- get out of here.”

“And do what? I’d miss the grumble in your voice too much. Come now, my dear, tell me what has that pretty hair of yours so tangled.” Villain’s hand grazed the locks atop Hero’s head, fingers skimming his scalp. She hummed her delight. “How pretty,” Villain whispered into Hero’s ear. “Even if it is greasy.”

“Look, I’m really not in the mood for this.”

Good God, what is that stench? Villain could gag- not could; Villain did gag on the smell. “When was the last time you showered, sugar?” Hero certainly didn’t smell like sugar, but it was in Villain’s nature to shoot a flirt at him anyways.

“Don’t know. Would you get your hand out of my hair?”

“You don’t know?” Villain sighed, dropping her hand and rounding the bench until she came to the front, facing Hero and his abnormally large eye sacks. “Oh, darling…” you have jellyfish beneath your eyes. “You should take better care of yourself. I could help you, you know?”

Hero’s eyes grew as wide as they could with eyelids made of lead. “Help me do what? Bathe?”

“Well, I certainly wouldn’t mind helping you do that- think of how close we would be, my sweet doll.” She sat beside the broken-beyond-repair hero, dragging a fingertip along his dirtied pants. Villain sighed, slightly bored of this game of chess. Her flirtations were slipping away like a wet bar of soap. What an ironic comparison.

Villain said, “What I meant is this; I’ll give your handsomeness a break- or your ugliness, rather. You need to regain your looks, hence the break.”

Ignoring the insult, Hero said, dead-panned, “And I’m supposed to believe you.” A soft tut.

“Have I given you any reason not to? On this pretty night?”

“Beyond the not-so-subtle insults,” Hero thought aloud, and finished with, “I guess not.”

With a scoff, Villain said, “I wouldn’t call those insults. I could have said much worse- and anyways, you know I’m a tease. I feel even more concerned that you’ve forgotten such a vital detail about me. More reason to leave you alone. Right, my love?”

“I still don’t know if I believe you.”

“Why would it matter what I did or didn’t do when you don’t even care to look after yourself?”

She makes a good point. Still… “What would you do then?” Hero didn’t particularly care to have this conversation right now, but- well, he was a hero. Even if he were too exhausted to take care of himself, it was still his responsibility to protect the people. Just because Villain was saying she’d leave Hero alone didn’t mean she’d leave the citizens alone.

“What would I do? Sulk, mostly. I’d miss your pretty little face while I sat alone on my couch.”

“Right. Because I always sit on a couch with you.”

“There’s a taste of that precious fire. You’re beautiful when you’re sarcastic- and healthy.”

Hero sighed. It didn’t matter what he said, did it? He could tell Villain she looked like a horse’s rear-end mixed with a jackal’s paw and she’d continue sticking around. “You said you’d give me a break.” Of course, Hero still didn’t believe Villain’s words. It was her one and only nature to torment him with pointless compliments- and harmful insults apparently.

As if I didn’t already know I look like crap. I’m tired; that’s all. No motivation to do anything but sit on the park bench. He didn’t even feel like getting up to stretch his legs, despite knowing it needed to be done. Hero would rather deal with the aches of standing than to be forced into using so much energy while sitting. How draining it was- standing up from his position now. That’s why he stayed put, even with Villain’s hand circling in his hair once again.

This time, the hand in Hero’s hair was actually soothing. The tender scrape of Villain’s nails against his scalp. The gentle pull through the hair as her fingers caught on tangles, though the larger knots were a tad painful. Hero hummed his delight at the two former feelings, finding himself leaning into the arm which offered such relief.

On a regular day, one not so adorned with absent motivation and sourness, Hero would have slapped Villain’s hand away- would have told her to go find a dog in the park to pet. Naturally, he would have regretted saying it, thinking that Villain might claw its eyes out instead of petting it. Okay, maybe she wouldn’t do something that serious, but she might have stepped on a puppy’s tail, making it screech- if only to horrify the owner.

“Isn’t this a nice break, sugar?” Villain asked, but, of course, there was more to it than this scalp massage. When Hero fell asleep, with his head on Villain’s shoulder, she would give herself a break- not him.

******

Eyes still closed from having just woken up, Hero pulled his shoulder back against the hard- hard? I thought I was in- His eyes cracked open.

White ceiling. Or, mostly white, at least. There was some water damage that Hero could see even through his blurry and freshly woken eyes. The yellow and orange stains did not belong on his ceiling.

He shifted slightly, body still stiff, but he wasn’t willing to stretch yet- just in case there was…a certain someone…paying attention. Damn Villain, Hero thought, because who else’s home could he be in if it weren’t his own?

It was with this thought in mind that Hero sat up. No use in lounging around. Better off to find a way out before Villain-

“Nice to see those starlit eyes of yours.”

Great. Turning his head, he saw Villain casually sprawled across a couch.

Well, one thing was for certain; Hero had the motivation to get up and run again. At least he could thank Villain for something, even if it were simply the desire to escape.

Sitting up, slowly and stiffly, Hero said, “A break. You were supposed to give me a break. It’s what you said, what you told me you’d do. You would give me a break to take care of myself and you would sulk.”

He could almost imagine Villain’s voice answering with an easy lull, ‘I didn’t say what the break would entail, love.’ Love. Darling. Doll. My dear. Disgusting, disgusting, disgusting.

“I gave you a break. Two of them, if we’re being technical. The massage and the shelter. Actually,” Villain smiled at him from her couch cushion, eyes closing just slightly as her cheeks gathered higher and higher. “I might call it liberation- instead of a break. Infinite freedom versus periods of mass depression and showerless nights.”

Hero felt his jaw tick. “What are you talking about?” he asked, voice low- just the way Villain liked.

He wasn’t helping his case any, now, was he? Being all cutesy. It only allowed Villain to enjoy this whole situation more.

“You wake up in your stalker’s home and don’t even think to check your body for modifications? What a pity you are sometimes,” Villain giggled. She meant it as a compliment; it was her way of calling the hero cute and favourable.

Stalker. Well, Villain might as well have been considered as such. She showed up just about everywhere Hero was, only to hold hostages for no other reason than to have control over someone, to hear the fear in their high whines- and to see the fear glistening low in their eyes. Villain was wicked, and she was wicked always in Hero’s presence. Stalker- maybe that’s what the news would start calling her if they, or Hero, ever managed to stop Villain.

Villain grew impatient with Hero’s procrastination of observation. “Explore yourself, won’t you?”

And Hero did now. He looked down his arms, torso, legs, anything that was in his perspective, but there was nothing out of the ordinary, except- “Do not tell me you actually washed me.” His arms were speck and dead-skin cleaned.

“A wet rag against your arms and legs, nothing else.”

Hero simply took her word for it, trying not to imagine how he’d feel if she were lying. How horrendous.

Then what is it? Nothing- absolutely nothing- was irregular, so why was Villain going on about…Hero’s fingers skimmed something along his neck- one of the few things he couldn’t see with his own eyes.

No…no. Not just along his neck. There was something inside of Hero’s neck. “What did you do to me?” His voice came out as a horrifyingly quiet whisper, one that squeaked in the back of his throat.

“You wouldn’t take care of yourself, Hero. I had to step in.”

“I don’t- no. No. Whatever you’re doing, you- you need to- I need to go home. I need you to stay away from me and I need- I need-” Oh no. Was he hyperventilating? He couldn’t- God, he couldn’t breathe. Hero was panicking, scratching at his neck, at the irregular shaped lumps. Get out. Get. Out. Getout. Getout. Getoutgetoutgetoutgetout.

A gasp sounded in the room as Hero’s head hit the ground, trying to dodge the zap that occurred at the front of his throat, right where he was scratching so madly.

“Well, I guess that’s a lesson learned rather quickly. Darling, you didn’t even know what those were, and yet you were trying to rip them out. It might have killed you.”

“Uhah.”

Villain quirked her head to the side. “Didn’t get that, sorry. Must have fried your vocal cords- better that than you build up a bunch of infectious bacteria.” Truth be told, the zap wasn’t so bad that it would permanently damage Hero- only give him little tics and make him fret.

“You’ll be so very happy that I took that rag over your skin- otherwise you’d have woken up to your own stench while I was injecting the little stun rods. That would have been difficult,” Villain laughed, legs extending until they laid on the arm of the couch.

“Now,” Villain piped, “there is an outfit laid out in the bathroom- down this hall here”- she pointed- “and second door to the right. Get a shower, bath, whatever you want, and get dressed. I have plans and I’m not leaving you here alone.”

Swerving her legs over the arm- despite having just put them there- Villain planted her feet on the ground and placed her elbows near her knees, leaning forward, all amount of humour aside. “I’m the only one who gets to torment you, you hear me? Not even you have my permission to do harm to yourself or otherwise slack in personal healthcare. If you are in any kind of bad condition, it will be because I allowed it. M’kay?”

She stood, walked several paces to where Hero still sat on the floor and patted his cheek. “I’m making myself food before we leave and while you take a shower. Don’t disappoint me by trying to escape, my dove. You’re in my cage now.” Villain gave Hero a tap on the head as she pulled a remote control out of her pocket with her other hand. For extra measure, she held one of the buttons for three seconds, sending Hero onto his back once again, writhing on the floor- though avoiding scratching his neck.

A lesson learned indeed.

“Believe it or not, I do intend to be kind to you. I just wanted to show you what happens if you decide you’re not worth taking care of again.”

One last click of the button and she was gone, leaving a panting hero behind in the dust.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Serenade (Daniela Dimitrescu/Reader) Pt. 8

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: T for language? Warnings: None? I think? Please let me know if I missed something Notes: Bit of fluff with some anxiety/update on primary conflict. Next chapter will be a cute date with Dani, the one after that will be maximum h*rny, and then what will likely be the finale. Music for this chapter here. PS this one is a bit on the shorter side, but I hope y'all still enjoy it. Past Chapters: Pt. 1: Nocturne, Pt. 2: Overture, Pt. 3: Accelerando, Pt. 4: Toccata, Pt. 5: Poco a Poco, Pt. 6: Elegy, Pt. 7: Harmony

Chapter 8: Obbligato

(Obbligato: An instrumental part which is essential in a piece of music)

“Okay, okay, serious this time, please? I’ll give you a kiss if you try hard enough,” you promised, grinning up at Daniela as you did. A week had passed since your talk in the library, with the two of you spending most days together, and you were progressing nicely with the musical lessons. Still, your girlfriend (you would never get tired of saying that word) was prone to getting a tad ‘distracted’. By you, usually. Not that it was intentional by any means. There was only so much you could do to keep her focused when the two of you were this close together.

“I could just kiss you anyway,” Daniela teased, leaning in with familiar intent. Right before your lips touch, however, she pulls back and smirks. “But if you insist, I can handle the challenge.” Then she’s turning back towards the piano, carefully finding the starting position. Even with her prior experience, you were impressed with how much she had already learned, and couldn’t help but be immensely proud of her. If anyone could meet Lady Dimitrescu’s expectations within a three month timeframe, it was the two of you. Except, of course, you still had to double-check just what her expectations were.

In the meantime, you were excited to hear your girlfriend play through the sheet music you had written up. Most of what you were working with had come from the family’s storage room, but you had also found some blank sheets, and figured it couldn’t hurt to create songs of your own. This particular one was relatively simple. It had been based on a song from a game you had played years ago, and only posed a moderate challenge due to its interesting rhythm. Daniela had seemed to enjoy playing it, with you even hearing her practice the song outside of your lessons, but had so far today refused to play it seriously.

Finally that was going to change. Once she found the starting notes, she nodded to herself, then started playing. For the first time today her expression is stern, focused. Seeing her like this was nice. She was always cute, you just thought that she was extra cute like this. But you tried not to let yourself get too distracted, knowing that you couldn’t give her feedback if you didn’t pay attention. In your head you “play along”, fingers miming the movements, knowing that it would help you catch any possible mistakes. Throughout the piece there are only a couple that you catch, none of them being severe enough to ruin the experience. Finishing with a little flourish, Daniela returns her gaze to you, grinning expectantly.

“Well? I seem to recall you promising me a reward,” she said, perking a brow. Laughing a little, you roll your eyes, before moving in to give her exactly what she wanted. Both of you are smiling into the kiss, enjoying every moment of it. Soon enough Daniela is running a hand through your hair, and pressing against you more, tilting her head just enough to deepen the kiss. You’re blushing hard now, thoughts going everywhere other than music. It’s not until you pull back for air that you remember what you’re supposed to be doing right now.

“As wonderful as this is… we still have a few more songs to go over,” you murmured, despite how much you wanted to keep kissing Daniela. By the way she groaned in frustration, you figured she felt the same way, more or less. “Hey, don’t fret too much. Think of this as an opportunity to earn a few more rewards,” you teased, gently patting her on the shoulder. For a moment she simply pouts, but eventually she sighs and gets ready to play another song…

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Rushing up the steps, practically two at a time, you desperately hoped that you wouldn’t be late. This was your third “update meeting” with Lady Dimitrescu, which by itself was enough to make you a nervous wreck. Add in the fact that this was the first time you’d be meeting alone? And in her personal study, no less? Well, it was safe to say that you were terrified. You hadn’t even been told why things were different this time. No, you were about as clueless as could be, given the circumstances.

By the time you make it your Lady’s study, you cannot tell whether your heart is racing due to stress or physical exertion. Regardless, you make it there in short time, arriving precisely at the scheduled hour. After taking a moment to settle your nerves, you briefly knock on the chamber door. There’s the sound of movement from inside before the way opens. Lady Dimitrescu has to bend a little to see out, but quickly smiles when she meets your gaze. Which was rather unexpected. The last time you had met with her she had been distanced, although still polite. Then again, Daniela had also been with you, and the focus was, as always, on her.

“Lady Dimitrescu,” you greeted, giving a short bow per customs. Then you were being waved in, brought over to a small sitting area, where you waited for permission to sit down. Once it was given, you relaxed a little. Maybe I don’t have as much reason to be nervous as I thought, you muse.

“Please, make yourself comfortable. There are no reasons for you to be unsettled, as far as I am aware,” Lady Dimitrescu said, smile disappearing for a moment at the end. But it’s back as quickly as it had vanished. Did she suspect something? Perhaps she had seen the way Daniela looked at you, or even overheard the whisperings of your roommates. Both thoughts do little other than renew your anxiety. Noticing this, Alcina frowns and shakes her head. “I was merely joking. Now, let us get to the reason for our meeting: How are Daniela’s lessons fairing? There is only so much I can glean from listening.” Glad to have something to think about other than your secret relationship with your boss’ daughter, you nodded and began explaining.

“Lady Daniela is making outstanding progress, in my opinion. Even with her occasional… lapses in attention, once she puts her mind to something, she’s quick to master it. At this point she can sight read nearly as fast and accurately as myself. However, we’re still going over vocabulary, as well as keys and their corresponding chords,” you answered, barely able to maintain eye contact with your employer. Thankfully, she seems to have accepted the inevitability of your nervousness. You were especially thankful now that you prepared to ask her a question. “My Lady, may I inquire about what specifically you expect from my teachings? If there are certain genres you wish for Daniela to be familiar with, or techniques-... I must admit I am unsure as to how to best meet your requirements.”

Slowly reclining in her chair, Alcina appears to ponder your question. In the meantime she sips at her beverage, holding the cup as if it were a fragile heirloom (which it could very well be), eyes looking into the middle distance. Then she gives a soft hum, setting her cup down and returning her attention to you.

“I suppose I can understand your concern. In some ways you have already exceeded my expectations,” she said, expression oddly plain in comparison to her positive phrasing. “My daughter has rarely invested herself in anything as much as she has in your lessons. For this, I am left wondering what she finds so captivating- the music, or the one who pulls the strings?... But that is not the answer to your inquiry, is it?” In that moment, you are incredibly still, willing yourself to keep a straight face, despite the racing of your heart. At your silence, Alcina perks a brow, expecting you to respond. You can’t, your mouth suddenly dry. “What I expect is a passion to educate, a drive to see my daughter flourish. I expect you to teach her exactly as much as she wants you to, focusing on whatever brings her the most joy. But I expect professionalism. Your duties come first, above your health, happiness, and all other desires. Am I understood?”

“Yes, my Lady. Of course, my Lady,” you replied, stuttering, eyes wide. Did she know? Or merely suspect?... There’s another thought, one you try desperately not to voice, only to hear the words fill the room before you can stop yourself. “May I ask where Lady Daniela’s desires fit into this?” Silence hangs heavy over the room for several seconds. Your employer has narrowed her eyes, lips curled downwards into a sharp scowl, watching you with thinly-veiled anger. All you can do is gulp and wait for her response. When it comes, you are surprised by the stability of her tone. It was almost as if she respected your gall.

“She is young still, with the mind of a lovesick maiden. Daniela does not know what she wants, not really, nor does she understand what she needs. If her… flirtatious nature begins to interrupt your instruction, then your response must be swift, and uninterested. Regardless of how unkindly she takes your rejection, I will ensure that she does not harm you,” Lady Dimitrescu said, giving a stern nod at the end. Though her tone was reassuring, you hardly felt better, considering you were far past the point of turning Daniela down (if anything, you had only turned her on). “Now, with that settled, I believe I should let you return to your duties. Oh, and do tell Cynthia that the tea she brewed was perfect, should you happen to see her.”

Then she looked away, practically ignoring your continued existence. So you rose to your feet, gave another bow, and left before your panic could devolve into a breakdown. Daniela is not going to be happy about this.