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blkkizzat · 3 months ago

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YAKUZA!TOJI X MILF!READER —aka toji on some joe goldberg bullshit

⟢ rating: mdni.18+ each episode will have its own ratings but general warnings— lactation kink, face riding, drugs (weed, alcohol, cigs), infidelity, yuji is sukuna x reader child, size-kink, milf kink, breeding kink, voyeurism, masturbation, dubcon/noncon, squirting, pussy talk, biting, creampies, obsessive tendencies, heavy manipulation, yandere, Toji in daddy and dad mode. this will be fem black reader coded as reader is foreigner and uses some aave but no other descriptors. ⟢ total run time: 𝟏𝟑.𝟒𝐤 of ? ⟢ opening theme: Rich Baby Daddy - Drake

⟢ subscriber access: tag request in comments, previous tag list from the teasers are already accounted for. ⟢ director's note: this fic is to celebrate my year of having this account! literally this is the first fic i thought of and wanted to write and have been working on it since nov'23. so full circle moment fr! i hope you enjoy it. ⟢ executive producers: special thanks to @littlemochabunni, @ryomens-vixen, @yung-notorious and @buttercupblu143 for helping me beta this and bounce off ideas and listen to me be crazy for the past 9-10 months about this fic 🥹.

꒰ disclaimer: this is a plot-driven eventual smut fic and is told mostly in Toji POV through flashbacks until the end of episode 3. so if you stick with me i promise you a freak nasty pay off in episode 4 💕🤭. the build up makes it 100x better, trust~ ꒱

🎬 𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐎𝐃𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓—

🎞️ 𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟏: ❝ I STILL GOT SOME LOVE DEEP INSIDE OF ME, PLEASE DRAG IT OUT OF ME ❞

⟢ Reflecting on the last 3 months of meeting you during a time of organizational unrest, how did casual desire turn into a sinister obsession for a deadly yakuza assassin like Toji Fushiguro? It's your fault though, as a new resident of the yakuza luxury high-rise, The Nursery—shoulda known better than to have smiled that brightly at a single-dad widower, mamas. episode run time: 𝟒.𝟕𝐤

🎞 ️𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟐: ❝ POPPIN' MY SHIT COME WITH CONSEQUENCES, POST NUT CLARITY I CAME TO MY SENSES ❞

⟢ With tensions in the organization at an all-time high and a traitor still on the loose, everyone is on edge. Fortunately, Toji has been watching over you for weeks, especially since Sukuna has been even less attentive. But when Toji notices you making a new friend—a potential lifeline apart from him—can he keep his jealousy in check? Just how far will Toji go to have you all to himself? episode run time: 𝟖.𝟕𝐤

🎞 ️𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟑: ❝ WE FROM TWO DIFFERENT WORLDS BUT IT'S A MATCH TO ME ❞

⟢ Forced to make difficult choices this past week, it's becoming increasingly clear Sukuna's loyalties lie more with the organization than you. But of course, as chance would have it, Toji is there to console you when you have no one. Who needs Sukuna, friends, or anyone else when you have Toji? Toji can see the cracks forming in your resolve—but when he pushes, will you still be able to resist his charms? Or will you crumble in his hands? episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇

🎞️ 𝐒𝟏 𝐄𝟒: ❝ JUST SAY GOODBYE TO HIM, THEN TAKE THE RIDE TO ME, RIDE TO ME ❞

⟢ Circumstances align and you're practically served on a platter to Toji, he takes this as the prime opportunity to finally claim you as his. Toji deserves you. You know this though, so he won't have to do a thing—you'll come to him all on your own like a good sexy lil' milf won't you, mamas? Nevermind about your world falling apart around you—Toji has already made all of the arrangements to see that you and Yuji are taken care of. episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇

🎬 𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓—

🎞️ 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝐒𝟎 𝐄𝟏: ❝ WANNA STICK AROUND FOR THE RIDE? BABY HOLD ON TIGHT ❞ AKA "DON'T DROP THE PANCAKES"

Prequel/Standalone. Yakuza!Sukuna x Exchange Student!Reader. ⟢ Moving to a foreign country for school ain't all sunshine and rainbows—especially when your student status prevents you from acquiring legitimate employment. Good thing a friend of a friend has a connect for under-the-table work. Although, being a topless maid for a ruthless yakuza leader wasn't on your bingo card for your new life abroad—especially when you end up pregnant. episode run time: ⩇⩇:⩇⩇

©𝐛𝐥𝐤𝐤𝐢𝐳𝐳𝐚𝐭 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐠𝐟𝐱, 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞.

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neil-gaiman · 8 months ago

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Gosh, I hope no one's asked this already but...

After watching The Sandman together, my husband and I are looking forward to watching Dead Boy Detectives. I've just watched the trailer and while I'm excited at the prospect of snuggling up with hubby to enjoy more of your creative genius, I'm really nervous that this show will be too much for me. While I can manage blood spurting and can even appreciate the occasional jump scare, the horror aspect is making me more than a little nervous.

Which leads me to ask...

On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being "Hey, let's pop some popcorn and gather the kids around the television," and 10 being "Watch in broad daylight with every curtain in your house open and every light in the house on or you'll never sleep again," how would you gauge the show and its episodes as a whole, horror-wise?

Yes, I apologize for being a wimp, (I blame my big sister for intentional exposure to "The Shining" as a 5-year old.) but I'm pretty certain you've answered a question like this kindly in the past, and I'd be most grateful.

Regardless, even if you only read this in passing and don't answer, please know that even though I'm just finding the time to get to know your work now, I have been fan of you as a human being for a long time. Thank you for all you contribute to the human race, Mr. Gaiman. There aren't enough kind people in the world.

Honestly, I'd say mostly it doesn't get scarier than a 4. It's not a horror series. It's very funny, very sweet, romantic and loving and human, sometimes painful and always weird.

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thefrogman · 3 months ago

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Froggie's Mailbox Adventures

I have been wanting to tell this story for a while now. This all happened right before my birthday and then I got sick for 4 weeks and didn't have the energy to talk about it.

So let us take a trip into the recent past to hear a tale of woe and triumph with a bunch of extra woe interspersed throughout.

It all began on the 4th of July.

Some neighborhood rascals ruined my old mailbox with a baseball bat.

They also destroyed my brand new mailbox sensor that lets me know when there is mail so I don't have to make multiple trips to check.

(Ring replaced it for free, so that was nice.)

Originally, I was going to hire someone to replace the mailbox. But I was not having much luck finding someone who could do that specific task. (I've been having trouble finding help in general due to living in a supposedly "dangerous" area.)

So I decided to try and install the mailbox myself. And I had no idea how much of an adventure that was going to be...

My first step was tearing off the old one to see how it was mounted.

I got some paper and a sharpie and noted where the holes were. And, of course, they didn't line up with the new mailbox.

Which is a really nice mailbox. I mean, it is solid. Check this bad boy out and please don't notice the dirty clothes lying on the floor in the background.

It is always so tempting to save a few bucks and get the cheaper thing, but I am so glad I splurged on this. It looks nice. It functions well. It has magnets. And I don't think it can be baseball-batted without some instant karmic retribution from Newton's third law.

My next step was to get a new mounting plate. And even though I try not to go to Home Depot because it is run by a bunch of conservative religious bigots... I went to Home Depot.

I was a little nervous about leaving the house at the time because I was still struggling with my heart issue (which I think is mostly resolved now). I was trying to be very careful about how much I exerted myself. I really didn't want to have an episode while I was out and about.

After searching for a while I discovered they had a mounting plate and a pressure-treated mounting board. I could do wood or metal. And they were located on completely opposite ends of the store because of course they were.

I had both items in my hand and I did that thing where you just keep staring at something hoping a useful thought will pop into your brain. I had no clue which one was better for my needs. There is surprisingly little information regarding mailbox installation on the internet. YouTube really let me down on this one. I was just kinda winging it and solving problems as I went along.

I stared for for a little while longer and no useful thoughts happened.

I was tired of staring so I just said, "Fuck it" and made an executive decision.

Then I almost passed out in Home Depot.

I spent too much time walking around that gigantic monstrosity of a store and my heart started beating super fast and my legs felt like jello and I started getting quite dizzy.

I was in rough shape.

So... I had a little lie-down next to a wall of tape measures.

I just stared up at them thinking about all of the things I could measure.

I could measure a dog.

Or a horsie.

Or a horsie the size of a dog.

Then I thought, "Ooh, that one has lasers! I NEED IT."

My brain was not functioning at 100% in that moment.

After about 10 minutes of thinking about lasers and things I could measure with lasers, my body seemed to reboot and I was able to get up. Thankfully no one saw me and thought there was a dead body in the aisle or something. But that was still embarrassing all the same.

Once my heart slowed down I was able to pay and make it out to the car. I headed home and saw one of the most unusual sunsets of my life. The sun was dim and a shade of orange I have never seen in nature. It was like, cheeto orange. Not only that, it was a perfect circle with a super crisp outline. It didn't look real.

I tried to get a picture of it but when I looked at the picture later, the camera didn't capture anything like what I saw.

This is the best approximation I can manage. But it still doesn't do it justice.

I was hoping I could get home in time to grab my real camera and capture this strange setting sun, but it dipped below the horizon just as I pulled into my driveway.

I then started problem solving how to get the new mailbox in place with the items I purchased. And I was on a deadline because I have no clue what happens when the mailperson arrives and they don't have a mailbox to put the mail in. Do they just throw it on the ground? Do they get to keep the mail? Are they going to use all of my grocery coupons?

And for some reason, my post office does not keep a consistent delivery schedule. I've been trying to figure out a pattern for weeks and they just seem to come "whenever" and that is about as close as I can pin it down. Which is why I got the mailbox sensor.

Due to my near fainting episode in Home Depot, I was in no shape to be handy, so I was trying to think of a temporary solution to put the new mailbox on without properly mounting it. At first I was going to just wrap it in packing tape a bunch of times. But then I noticed I had a bunch of string. And I decided that was a more interesting solution... for reasons? My brain was still not doing well. But when I tried to tie the new mailbox to the post with the string it failed miserably. And I realized the packing tape wouldn't work either. The mailbox did not sit flat on the post and it wiggled. However, because I tried the dumb string method, I discovered this wiggle issue and it actually helped me figure out how to mount it.

I gave up for the night and decided to hope I could install the box in the morning before "whenever" happened. The next morning I started drawing dots on boards and comparing my old holes to my new holes and measuring clearances. (Measuring without lasers like a chump.) I needed to elevate the mailbox in order to mount it and that's when I thought to combine the board and the plate. I could screw the board into the old holes and then create new holes in the board for the plate to attach. And the plate lined up with the holes in the bottom of the new mailbox.

EASY!

It was a pretty big brain moment for me and I felt like I just solved quantum physics or something.

You're probably pretty confused because you are not as smart as I am.

Here is a diagram to help.

The board mounts to the post arm. The plate screws into the board. The mailbox screws into the plate.

Or just use string.

Also, how fortunate was it that I stared for all that time and got frustrated and just bought both things?

My next problem was that my drill wouldn't fit inside the mailbox and I couldn't screw the screws in place. So I drilled pilot holes in the board so I could manually screw in the screws with a ratcheting right angle screwdriver.

And the only reason I had one of those is because I use it as a fidget toy. (I like the clicky sounds.)

Another lucky happenstance!

I tried to prepare as much as I could in my garage before dragging all of my tools to the end of my lengthy driveway. I brought along my dad's old rolling walker so I'd have something to transport everything.

But also so I'd have something to sit on while I was installing the new box. Then I wouldn't have another heart episode and need another lie-down.

Seriously, how big is my brain?

I am like the smartest person alive.

So I got to the end of the driveway with all of my tools and my board and my plate and my templates and I realized something was missing.

The new mailbox.

I am like the dumbest person alive.

After a quick back-and-forth to retrieve the mailbox, I got started on my master mounting plan.

I screwed the board onto the post arm.

Then I screwed the plate into the board.

Then I lined up the new mailbox onto the plate.

But as I was doing this, I was kinda sticking out into the street a little bit. And usually that isn't a big deal. Cars can see me from very far away and they were just steering around me. But then two cars came from opposite directions at the same time and I was in a precarious position where I could not move. One car steered wide to avoid me, and for some reason, the other car decided not to slow down but to drive off the edge of the street.

And as they pulled this maneuver I heard a loud thump, followed by a loud pop, and then the sound of hissing getting farther and farther away.

Like a snake version of the Doppler effect.

They drove directly into this and popped their tire.

On the one hand, I felt a little responsible and guilty. On the other, it is not my responsibility to fix the street. And on a third hand, that was silly driving behavior and perhaps they will see this as a learning moment.

After processing what just happened I got back to the task at hand. To my delight and surprise, all of my planning and problem-solving was working. Everything fit together perfectly. The right angle ratcheting screwdriver was screwing in the screws. And after I tightened the final one...

I had successfully installed a new mailbox, on my own, without any jankiness or tape or string.

Like, I did this legit proper.

Tons of pure endorphins rushed into wherever endorphins go. (Again, I am very smart.) That feeling of accomplishment was pure ecstasy. I had no idea how to do this and in less than 24 hours I was basically an expert mailbox installer. I took some shots of my work on my phone so I could brag to Katrina, packed up all of my tools, and began to walk back to the house.

And... my heart started beating fast again.

And... I needed to have another little lie-down in the grass next to my driveway.

I stared up at the sky and was frustrated and proud simultaneously. A weird mixture of emotions. At the time I didn't know if my heart could be fixed. But thankfully I had my sense of accomplishment to temper my heart sadness.

And then I thought, "I should get a new address sign."

Epilogue time!

I got on Amazon and started looking up new signs. And I found one that was solar powered and lit up at night. So clearly I needed to have that one. My midnight food delivery people will never struggle to find my house again!

And it actually looked pretty neat.

(My address is not actually four 0s, but you are free to try sending me something.)

The sign was very easy to read... if you were super duper close.

But if you were farther away...

You couldn't actually distinguish the numbers. And it kinda looked weird next to the mailbox. And headlights made the numbers even harder to see. Which was the opposite of what I was going for.

So I opted to get a more traditional sign.

(Please send items to the realm of nothingness. I am in the void.)

But this bugged me because the sign was a different size than the old sign and the connection points didn't line up perfectly.

I HAD A CATAWAMPUS CHAIN!

WHICH IS THE MOST UNACCEPTABLE KIND OF WAMPUS!

It was at this point that Katrina started making fun of my perfectionism.

But this wasn't perfectionism for perfection's sake.

My Dad was having trouble fixing things around the house. And some other kids knocked over the previous, previous mailbox. And he found the strength to go to the store, get a new one, and install it all by himself. He was at the end of the driveway, attached to his portable oxygen canisters, and fixing one last thing for this house.

And I guess I just wanted to get it back to perfect. Because he never did any handyman task half-assed. He was a full-ass handyman. Always.

So... I fixed the sign.

Perfectly balanced.

Again, feel free to send me stuff to 0000 Road.

I'm sure it will get here... "whenever."

#tumblr wasn't showing this post on my other blog #so I'm trying it here #I'm also trying a read more #it usually kills the notes #but perhaps that isn't true anymore

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eroticbellybloatfan · 15 days ago

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Dude ludwig definitely a secret gainer or maybe mostly when connor is around

Hard to say for certain. I'm leaning no, but there's some good reasons that he's certainly a feedie to a certain extent. 1. Lud clearly is a "live to eat" guy. On his episode of last meals he talks about how he finds a dish he loves, orders 3 in a row, and gains 10 pounds and never looks back. 2. He loves the attention. Even though he feels the need to fit a stereotype of fitness, he bloats VERY easily and gets good views when he pushes his belly out. Which is why we end up getting more and more of that content. 3. Connor content does revolve around American food, because that's what Lud sees as purely American. This is good for his own viewpoint around happiness, and it means we get nice food-related content between Connor and Lud. And the pounds tend to come with it.

#lud

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absolutebl · 1 month ago

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This Week in BL - Lots of lovely kisses & an unwarranted upset in the standings

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Oct 2024 Week 2

Ongoing Series - Thai

Fourever You (Thai Thurs YT) ep 2 of 16 - Yes yes J&J should be first but I am weak in the face of, well, frankly this man's face:

Pond = greatest piner in a dog’s age. The yearning in that boy’s eyes is obscene, it’s like the most explicit sex that only he can see and we’re just voyeurs.

Thus I continue to adore this stupid show and everything it stands for. No notes. May the fluff continue eternal.

Jack & Joker (Thai Mon IQIYI) ep 5 of 12 - Everyone is so skilled in this show, but War is truly glorious. Considering the pacing, I think we are probably in for some long periods of darkness, suffering, and pain soon. I’m not mad about that prospect, it’s earned and foreshadowed, I just thought I’d lay it out there.

Kidnap (Fri YT) ep 6 of 12 - More boys from GMMTV with good communication. Who knew? Min has SUCH a white knight complex. NO SINGING. Good demanding kiss, though. Well, Ohm can handle anything.

Meanwhile, this really is a bodyguard romance under another name. And I kinda wanna rewatch Never Let Me Go as a result.

Love Sick 2024 (Thai Sun iQIYI) ep 4 of 15 - Earn remains best boy and my favorite character. Phun is v jelly, as he should be. AND I like Ohm & N'Mik better in this version. I still prefer the original leads, but I’m enjoying this enough.

I had no idea how much I missed Gunsmile! It’s so nice to see him on my screen again.

Monster Next Door (Thai Thurs Gaga ) ep 12 fin - I hate Diew’s mom. Hate her. So much. She may be my least favorite mom ever in BL. That’s saying a lot. No I don’t think she was redeemed.

Conclusion

Adapted from the novel Godzilla Next Door by Jiwinil about an introvert who lives mostly in his room, until a loud annoying extrovert moves in next door. This was one of my top picks for 2024 and I’m delighted to say it satisfied expectations. A charmingly serene story of opposites attract, that featured good communication, patience, and genuine affection used to build a solid relationship.(I’m particularly delighted that our musician is a drummer and I don’t have to listen to him sing.) Yes it’s a tad slow but it’s very earnest and leans into the kind of sweetness that Thai BL does best. Doesn’t hurt that this starred an actor (Big) that many of us have been hoping would get a lead for years. I was pleased and comforted. This is not a kind of BL that suits everybody, but it suited me admirably. 8/10

Battle of the Writers (Sun YT) ep 10 of 12 - Ozone and the Ice Prince (name still unknown) did their little dance. What an earnest and romantic confession from our Icy man. I literally said “no no no just kiss, no foreheads.” And it was a great crying kiss, my favorite. Honestly, that amount of emotion hadn’t been earned by this pair, but I don’t mind. I could watch a whole show just about them. Also woah! Major nekid on YT?

Thailand......

Risking demonetization for arse…...

I guess we’ve all been there.

Where was I?

I’m happy with this episode since it was mostly my side couple. But the distribution of main couple and side couple and the focus of each episode is wildly erratic with this show. It’s very odd. (And let's be clear we ordered errotic not erratic.)

Every You Every Me (Thai Mon Gaga) ep 1 of 10 - Jade and Chin have lived over a thousand lifetimes. In each one they somehow manage to fall in love with each other. (This pair, TopMick was piloted in a My Universe ep, that was one of the only ones I liked.) Soulmate premise is a mix of Color Rush and La Pluie. Frankly, this isn’t as good as either, but it’s enjoyable in a slow cheerful way. Especially if you like this particular set of tropes. It’s quietly lovely and I like the leads. Sunshine is very very sunshine and our tsundere is a grumpy mysterious nerd. Trigger for domestic abuse. It looks like each episode is gonna be a completely different meet cute with the same pairing. It’s more linked vignettes than any overarching story. So if you don’t like this pair, you won’t like this series.

Addicted Heroin (Thai Tues WeTV) ep 9 of 10 - More sports day. (Everybody’s doing sports days right now.) Random sides kissing. Where did the glasses person come from? Was he introduced and I forgot about it? Oh that’s the evil cousin! Okay… anygay. Sides randomly flip-flop who they like and I don’t know what the fuck is going on. This show. I swear. Ooo caught kissing. And… killed? What a mind fuck of a soap opera. Honestly, I’m fine if he’s dead, I don’t care at this point I just feel jerked around.

For some reason no eng sub for me for the first half. So I watched with Spanish subs (which is about as good as my Thai, only for different words). What a wild experience.

Bad Guy My Boss (Thai Sun Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - Oh dear. I just can’t imagine ever rooting for this couple. Which means… Why am I watching this?

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

My Damn Business (Korea Sat YT) eps 1-2 of 7 - Oh I love it. Casual flirty westernized-style boss. Reserved reluctant cutie (yes we’ve seen the actor before). Is it disgusting workplace harassment? Oh most certainly. Do I enjoy it anyway? Yep, I’m warped. No defense, but at least it’s something from Korea.

Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 3 of ? - I like the lead being bullied and pushed to his limit thus turning into a psychopath. It’s gonna be a fun ride if it really goes Devil Judge just teens and actually gay. I wonder if it has the strength of its convictions?

Our Golden Times (Hong Kong YT) 5 fin? - I guess that is the reunion? What an odd little piece. I’m not entirely sure what I feel about it except that this feels more BL than anything Hong Kong has given us so far (which isn't much). The subs are truly terrible. Since I speak absolutely zero Cantonese I can’t really fix them in my brain. I thought this was the final ep but then a teaser for ep 6 dropped so I we have at least one more.

First Note Of Love (Taiwan Mon Gaga) ep 10 of 12 - It was a nice, if entirely unearned reunion. And the leads do kiss beautifully. Trust Taiwan. I am so glad that Orca is back! There was even a little language play flip-flopping just for me. Very cute. Also GREAT kissing. How long have we been waiting for Thailand and Taiwan to kiss?

Eccentric Romance (Korea Weds Viki) eps 1-2 of 12 - Silkwood’s 2nd Thai/Korean colab. This has been in production since 2022 which is a LONG time in the BL world (worrying). But I like the concept: friends of 10 years who’ve been hiding feelings for each other enter the same university. Plus MURDER. Stars Yoon Jun Won (The Man BLK) and Thai actor Save Saisawat (Ai Long Nhai). I begin to think every The Man BLK member will eventually lead out a BL at this point.

It’s enjoyable in a weird way. Grumpy (hottie with a crush) + sunshine (captain oblivious). I gotta say, since this is the second relationship dual lingo style in our BL rn that it’s ALWAYS weird if the other half doesn't occasionally code switch languages, especially for specific words. In other words, the Korean dude is supposed to at least understand Thai, occasionally he’s should use a Thai world to get a point across. And the Thai dude is there to STUDY KOREAN, he should be slipping in and out of Korean regularly. Bah.

It's airing but...

Love is Like a Poison AKA Doku Koi: Doku mo Sugireba Koi to Naru (Japan Tues Netflix?) 5 of 10 eps - I never managed to get hold of ep 5. Frankly, it’s going to Netflix (I don’t subscribe) so I might not finish this out of sheer laziness.

The Hidden Moon (Sat WeTV) ep 1 of 10 - This is a supernatural romance (my ghost boyfriend trope) by Violet Rain (I Feel You Linger). A man is hired to write an article about an old mansion in Chiang Mai being converted into a café. He sees the ghosts of people who died at the mansion, falls in love with one of them. Was substantially recast. I loved IFYLITA except the ending so I think I'll let this one run it's course you can tell me if it's work tracking down... if they managed to land it. I have my doubts.

Gangster and His Boyfriend (Korea ????) 8 eps? - was supposed to air 10/10 Kim Dong Bin (famous trainee & idol reality competitor, yeah that happens) stars as a fallen idol who unexpectedly becomes entangled in a gangster family. Discovers that his friend’s father is responsible for the murder of his entire family years ago. I don't know much about this one, neither does anyone else and I'm not sure where I got that release date so……

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

Still Coming Oct 2024:

10/17 Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo (Korea Thurs Gaga) 8 eps - High school student Do Hoe lives with his violent and brutal father who runs a Taekwondo gym in a rural area. One day, cheerful Ju Young arrives, he dreams of going to college for Taekwondo. Joy begins to fill Do Hoe's dark life. An unexpected incident forces them apart, they reunite ten years later.

10/21 Love in the Big City (Korea ????) 8 eps - Okay, this is both a movie (already out) and a series. Neither one is likely BL and I can't imagine it will end happily. I'm giving both a pass but here's your synopsis.

Cynical fun loving student Young pinballs from home, to class, to on night stands. He and Jaehee, his female besie and roommate, frequent nearby bars where they push away their worries about life, love, and money with soju and hookups.

10/23 See Your Love (Taiwan Weds Gaga & Viki) 10 eps? - Zi Xiong, a third-generation heir, attempting to flee from taking over their family business, meets and falls in love with Shao Peng, who works as a hearing-impaired nurse. From the same production house as Kiseki Dear To Me in partnership with Shinehouse Theatre, funded by Taiwan’s BIGART + Japan's Rakuten (Viki). Show includes Lin Chia Yo (Be Loved in House: I Do). Director Chiang Ping Chen’s childhood experiences with his deaf uncle have inspired the drama.

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

Addicted Heroin

Incidentally he didn’t ask to “be with Ter” he asked if he could flirt/court him. jeeb doesn’t really have a direct translation, but it isn’t “be with.”

Fourever You

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in its infinite wisdom doesn't like too many at-ings.

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peachesofteal · 1 year ago

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Dead Disco / Chapter 10

Dead Disco masterlist

Ghost/Soap/female reader 3.1k words - AO3 Warnings-tags: 18+ no smut but this fic contains mature themes. Relationship issues, anxiety, self loathing, crying. Angst. Brief mention of asshole ex. Eating related issues. Mention of prescription medication, mental illness and depressive/manic episodes. Pre established throuple. Darling is her/your own tag/warning. Excessive internal monologue. You held onto the hot pan too long, and now you’ve been burnt.

"Look at me."

"I can't." You keep your eyes clenched tight, so tight it hurts, lungs burning inside your chest.

"Yes you can, darling. Just open your eyes." Simon's voice is soft, an entreating melody, grit and gravel smoothed out with the gentleness of his words. You get lost in it, the soft murmuring, the easy request, and when you open your eyes, he's still right in front of you, thick palm on the back of your neck, Johnny by his side. "Good girl."

"I'm sorry." You whisper, and Johnny's brows crease, his fingers brushing along your cheek.

"Ye dinnae have anything to be sorry for, darling. Ye never do."

"I didn't-" you gasp for a breath, and Johnny shifts, moving so that you're in front of him, sat between his legs, back against his chest. His hand holds yours, nestling above your breastbone.

"Breathe with me. Ye can do it."

"I didn't- I wanted to be better. Be different. I didn't want you to see." You try to explain, try to make sense of it for them. Simon's fingers intertwine with Johnny's, his other hand still firm on the back of your neck, your body cradled between them, in the space that once never existed, a space that now feels like it's been carved out just for you. Johnny pushes closer, holding you tight, and Simon leans forward, forehead touching yours, voice barely a murmur.

"We've always seen you, darling."

The floor is a fairly comfortable spot to lay.

It’s comfortable enough, you suppose, as you lay on your back with your eyes fixed on a spot along the ten-foot-high ceiling. Maybe you could paint the ceiling. With clouds. Or a night sky. That might be cool.

Voices vibrate through the flat, locked door the only thing separating you from them, Johnny’s tone pitching with increasing anxiety, Simon’s cadence soothing, and calm.

He’s calling your name. Calling you darling. Calling you anything to try to get you to come to the door.

You’re overreacting.

You’re a fool.

You close your eyes. A night sky might be cool. You could do a lot with the stars, or maybe even the milky way. Get some greens and greys and cobalt in there. Make it look like a long exposure photo. And the moon, you could certainly paint the moon. You’d have to find a ladder tall enough though. And you’d probably need help. You haven’t painted from a ladder in years, not since you did that one mural for-

“Darling.” It’s Simon. Again. And again, and again, again. Darling, darling, darling. “It’s getting late. Will you open the door?" You keep your eyes closed, but for a minute, your mind fractures, splitting in two, confusing emotions and thoughts bubbling up to the surface.

Don’t think about it. Don’t.

“No.” You croak out in a whisper. It’s quiet, but he hears it. You know he does.

“Please. I need to know you’re alright, at least.”

You held onto the hot pan too long, and now you’ve been burnt.

It’s late. The streets are probably mostly empty. You could run down them, if you wanted. You could take a train anywhere. You could take a plane, even, go on a vacation. Go somewhere nice. Go somewhere tropical, maybe get a cute rental, spend some time in the sun or by the oc-

The thoughts are rapid fire. They spill over, trying to patch up the expanding wound in your heart. They grow and twist, convincing you it’s a good idea, the best idea, to just slip away for a little bit. To go somewhere you don't have feel this, where you don't have to know this as well as you do.

Don’t think about it. Pack it up. Put it away.

Johnny’s eyes haven’t left your face. His fingers stroke from the crown of your head and hairline to your temple, your cheek. He’s staring at you like you’re something precious, like you’re a piece of gold, something marvelous he’s never seen before.

“What is it?” You ask, half asleep, drowsy in the bed. You’re still wrapped in a post orgasm haze, cocooned in the soft and sweet of their attention, affection, and Johnny only smiles, leaning forward to press his lips to your forehead.

“Ye’re so special to us. Ah love ye. Did ye know that?” You shrug, ducking your face away, pressing it into his shoulder to avoid his eyes.

A wave of longing crashes over you. It swells in your heart until tears prick in your eyes, and you take a deep breath to steady yourself.

It’s so much. So much more than you ever imagined. So much more than you ever thought you could have.

“She doesn’t.” Simon says over your shoulder. His hand sits on your waist, the touch firm. Grounding. Like a tether to their world. Their love. You turn, nose pointing up towards the ceiling, looking at him through your peripheral, your fingers intertwined with Johnny’s, holding onto them both. Seeing them both.

“Tell me again.”

The TV in the living room is on.

You can hear it’s faint murmur, some movie playing on low volume, the guys undoubtedly sitting stiff on the couch, waiting for you to appear.

You stare at the dark, nearly blackened trees that you’ve painted onto canvas, long, broad brushstrokes taking up too much space, bark texturized to appear burnt, nearly dead, forest scourged by a disease or fire, you’re unsure.

“It starts to chafe us.” Us. Us, he said. Us. Him and Johnny. Right?

“It doesn’t seem fair.”

You’re unsure of everything right now. Unsure about how you should feel. Unsure about what’s happening inside your head.

“-sometimes I worry… about it being the right thing…” The more you think about it, the more you start to lose your grasp. Were those his exact words? Did he mean something else?

For the first time in a long time, you think about one of your ex's. You think about a person who made you feel so small, so much like a burden, a horrible, unwanted responsibility, all the time. You'll never have what regular people have, he said. No one will ever be able to put up with this fucking circus. No one will want this.

Was he right?

You should have gotten out. The sentiment replays over and over in between your ears, the awful, miserable doubt and fear and sadness picking away at you until you can feel yourself starting to compartmentalize it all, trying to sort it into neat little bins, trying to keep the weight that is sinking to the bottom of your soul from drowning you, trying to build a wall around your heart.

It’s not conscious. It’s like you’re not even in the driver’s seat anymore, not feeling the full effect of your emotions, not letting it in.

It’s how you felt, when you packed your bags the last time. How you felt when you checked into the hotel, like you were on autopilot. Buried beneath a mountain of feelings but enclosed in a glass cage, segregated from it all.

You should have gotten out.

“I said I was listening.”

“But I don’t want ye to listen. I want ye to talk, darling. I want ye to tell us how ye’re feeling. We can’t do this if ye’re not able to communicate.” Johnny’s voice is steady, but there’s a hint of anger behind it, a small flare just starting to light. It makes you angry, that he’s getting angry, and it churns in your stomach until you’re biting out a retort.

“I communicate just fine!”

“Do ye?” He snaps, exasperated, your head jolting backwards with wide eyes. “Because from where I’m standin’ it feels like ye’re trying to be stubborn on purpose. Like a child.”

“A child? You’re calling ME a child?” The air in their apartment is suddenly paper thin, and you hold your breath as Johnny watches you with that same, unchanged, irritated expression.

“Alright. This is over. We’re taking a break from this conversation.” Simon tells you both, fingers sliding over your shoulder, the touch meant to comfort, reassure, but you jerk away.

You eye your purse, your keys on the counter.

“I’m just gonna go home.”

“No.” He rebukes, and Johnny pales.

“No, darling. Ye just got here, and we missed ye so, so much. I’m sorry, I dinnae mean-” Johnny pleads, crestfallen, and it makes you feel worse. Like you’re failing him. Like you’re failing at this. Like you’re not good enough for it, for them. “Please?” He adds, and you wilt, silence falling over the three of you again, awkward and wrong.

“It’s alright.” Simon says. “If you want to go. I’ll take you home.”

“I can get home on my own.” You try not look at him, finding mundane details in the floor, the sink to stare at instead of their faces, resisting eye contact until Simon steps directly back into your line of sight.

“I’ll take you.” He steps closer, and like there is a magnet pulling you into his orbit, you respond, tilting your face backwards, letting him see everything. The tears. The anger and sadness. The confusion. He’s intentional with his movements, letting you anticipate everything, the movement of his hand, the bend of his body as his lips come down to press against your forehead. “Tomorrow, alright?” He asks and tells with the words, seeking permission, giving command. Tomorrow, you’ll talk. Tomorrow, you’ll get it sorted. Tomorrow, you and Johnny will apologize. And you’ll try again. Like you always do.

You nod, because the promise of tomorrow, the assurance that this hasn’t all come crashing down, is the only way any of you will be able to sleep tonight.

“Tomorrow.”

They both straighten on the couch when the door clicks open.

“Hey.” Johnny says softly, hopefully, and Simon says nothing, just watches you like you’re a wounded animal that might try to flee at any moment. On edge. Vigilant.

Your mind turns, but nothing comes out of your mouth. No response. No acknowledgement. Just empty silence that feels like a thousand pounds, all laying on top of the three of you. Suffocating you. Killing you.

You beeline for the bedroom.

Running away. You’re running away. Are you really going to run away?

The memory of the hotel haunts you, the awful, empty pit in your stomach that could have swallowed you whole, the dark curtains and dark room enveloping you in a never-ending spiral.

All you wanted was to be found. All you wanted was to be home, with them.

All you wanted was your home, the one you built, made, suffered for, with them. The one that you carved out inside your own bones to hold space for two others, not just one. The home that you completely changed your life for, the love that you believed would see you through it all.

The love that was always them first. The love that you barged in on, knocked walls down, forced yourself inside of. The love that they held for one another, before they ever held it for you.

Your head feels like it's underwater.

Did you make a mistake? Should you have sent them away that time? Should you have fought yourself harder?

The bed calls to you. It begs you to lay down in it, to burrow yourself beneath it's soft sheets, curl up on top of it's ridiculous mattress. Get lost in it. Be found in it. Let your boys curl themselves around you in it, let them kiss you softly and make you promises about how much they love you, or how they understand the way you feel.

If you close your eyes, you can almost see the future. Minutes would pass before Johnny crept inside the door, scoping it out. Doing the recon. Looking for you. His heart would soar when he saw you in the bed, his fears allayed, and he'd hold you so tight you'd think you were suffocating.

If you were lucky, Simon would come and turn your brain off. Johnny would pass you to him and he'd bring your deepest insecurities, your worries to light, dragging them out to be exorcised and vanquished, by the only men capable of doing so.

Is that what you want?

Should you have gotten out?

“There she is.” Johnny coos above you, warm palm cradling your cheek. You blink, fog encasing your mind struggling to clear, and you push yourself up onto your elbows.

“What-“

“Happened?” Simon finishes from where he kneels next to the couch, concerned eyes trained on yours, not missing a beat.

You blink. What did happen? Did-

“When was the last time ye ate something, darling?” Johnny asks, not unkindly, palm at your back to relieve the pressure from your elbows, moving you into a sitting position so he can take the spot on the couch behind you, effectively wrapping you up in his arms as Simon settles on the other side.

Shame curdles your stomach, hot embarrassment flaring in your veins. You avoid peering over Simon’s shoulder at the disarray of your kitchen, wincing when you realize he’s sitting on a pile of your dirty clothes.

“I had breakfast.” You whisper, but Simon shakes his head.

“When?”

“Yesterday.” You try to adjust, to sit more upright, but the sudden movement has your head spinning, and your palm covers your eyes, little groan in your throat.

“Easy.” Johnny soothes. Your water bottle is in his hand, and he unscrews the lid for you, lifting it to your lips. “Slow sips, darling. Not too much.”

It’s easier this way, you realize. Easier to do what’s being asked of you, easier to listen than to think. After a few sips, Johnny pulls the bottle away, and wide fingers stroke your cheek.

“This is what you were talking about. A few weeks ago.” Simon murmurs, concentrating all his focus, all his attention, on you, fingers still caressing your skin gently. Lovingly.

“I didn’t mean for it to get so bad this time. I… usually have a better handle on myself.” You try to lie, but Simon cocks his head.

“Do you?” His fingers hold up the scrap of paper, the one with your note to yourself scrawled across it.

‘You HAVE to, or you’ll regret it.’

You bite your lip, but Simon’s thumb presses into it, rolling it out from beneath your teeth, as Johnny rubs your arm, lips soft against your temple.

“I’m going to take you home. To ours.” Simon tells you slowly, each word deliberate “Johnny is going to clean up your apartment and pack you a few things for the rest of the week.” When you don’t answer, brain slow to catch up, Johnny murmurs in your hair.

“You have to agree, darling.” Simon watches, silent for a moment before he answers the unspoken question, still cradling your face with one hand.

“You can trust us.”

“Where are ye going?” Johnny asks when you appear from the bedroom, hesitant steps keeping him far enough from your body, desperation written all over his face.

“Out.” Your answer is short, sufficient. It feels like it’s coming from another person. You still think you might be underwater.

“Out? No… we need to talk and-“

“I don’t want to talk. To either of you.”

“Darling. Stop.” Simon tries to cut you off, but you turn sharply, away from them both, backpack swinging on your back.

“Ye canae run away from this, from us.” Johnny pleads. “We need to talk about it. Communicate. Like we promised.”

“Like we promised?” You hiss, sizzle of anger breaking through the ice that’s frozen in your veins. “The promise that we made to always tell each other how we’re feeling, the one that he can’t honor?” You jerk your thumb towards Simon, who tries to take a step towards you, only for you to retreat. “Don’t corner me!” you snap, and against your attempt at control, your voice breaks, sob welling in your chest.

Don’t think about it.

“It’s alright.” His hands are palms out, cautious. It’s supposed to make him look like he’s not a threat, make him seem harmless. But he’s not harmless. This gaping hole in your heart says so. “We don’t want you to leave.” He implores. “Please. I- let me explain.”

“There’s no need. Everything is pretty clear.”

“No, it’s not.” Johnny argues. “Just, let Simon at least tell-“

“Tell me what? Tell me how it’s not fair? Does it chafe you too, Johnny? You also thinking what’s the right thing? Because it’s an us thing, right? You and him. It’s an us and me. It’s the us that I suffer for.” Your voice crests, and Johnny flinches.

“I made a mistake.” Simon whispers. “Don’t let my stupidity make you question your place in this relationship. We love you, darling. I love you.” Tears burn at the back of your eyes, and you feel the horror of the truth, the confusion about your love for them, their love for you, searing together into a snarled mess.

“If I left you, the both of you, at the end of the day, you’d still have each other. You’d still be together, and I would have nothing!”

“That’s not true. We canae exist without ye.” Johnny sounds broken, hopeless, but you blow by it, dancing around Simon to pull your prescription bottles from the kitchen cabinet by the sink.

“If I died tomorrow-“

“Do not say that.” Simon cuts you off. “Don’t ever say that.” His knuckles are white at the edge of the countertop, expression stricken, and Johnny looks horrified. They both watch you like they’re afraid of what you might say next, what you might do, and nausea pools saliva on the back of your tongue.

Don’t think about it.

You close your eyes, and search for that underwater feeling. That untouchable feeling, the boxes being packed away in your mind, and try to cling to it, try to shut up the incessant stream of doubt and loathing and everything going wrong inside your head.

They don’t need you. They have each other.

You chafe them.

Don’t think about it.

“I need…” You trail off, trying to take a deep breath. Trying to organize your thoughts. Trying to hear yourself through the noise of everything else, through the searing pain that’s ripping through your heart.

“It’s alright, darling.” Simon murmurs, encouraging you. “Tell us what you need. Whatever it is.” Johnny’s face has shifted from despondent to hopeful, eyes wide and locked onto yours, while Simon waits, his normal steadfast and patient demeanor nowhere to be found, instead he’s more anxious, more nervous than you’ve ever seen.

You close your eyes again. Your voice shakes when you finally speak.

“I need a break.”

#dead disco #peaches writes #ghost x soap x reader #soap x ghost x reader #ghost x reader x soap #female reader #john soap mactavish #simon riley #johnny mactavish #johnny mactavish x reader #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #ghoap

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lucy-shining-star · 1 year ago

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Okay so I'm probably based cause Mateo is my favourite character, so that might turn to defensive but I have to say something about some things from this:

...Though first o all I agree about that blabbing in Rita arc and I must say I'm dissapointed there was never some onscreen reaction to him almost letting her in that room (I don't reember how it's called) or him admitting to that onscreen. Like did it it ever happpen. I'm assuming it did but I can't be sure and this is so annoying damn it.

About Isabel I don't think it's comparable to anyone else cause it was more Elena being mother-figure to her younger sister than anything else? She was angry cause someone who she wants to protect the most put themselves in danger when she said to them to not do that.

About 'Movin on up' vs 'The Last Laugh' ...I don't think either of these episodes was about them wanting free time? 'Movin on up' was about Mateo moving in the palace, so he wouldn't have to take long time to go to palace from home and other way around. ...And about Naomi wasn't that more about Elena being jelaous of Veronica 'stealing' Naomi from her and work was just excuse to not let her? Or did I read to much of elena x naomi interpretations of this episode but like I still think it works with friendships

Hi! I just read your post about Mateo recently. If I may, can you give me any specific instances in the narrative of the show where Mateo isn’t called out as heavily as they should have? I’m just curious?

During the Shuriki returns arc in particular, Mateo makes some pretty glaring mistakes that I feel like he should've gotten much more flack for (and based on what we see elsewhere in canon, I feel pretty confident that if Gabe, Naomi, Isa, or Esteban at least --and possibly even Elena-- had made these mistakes, they wouldn't have been swept under the rug nearly as quickly as they were for Mateo).

While it's unfair to completely blame Mateo for Carla's manipulating him during the "Rita" arc, I feel like it's reasonable to hold him a *bit* accountable. He did after all blab highly confidential information (on more than one occasion) to try and impress a pretty girl with how clever and important he was. (Something tells me that if any of the others had done likewise, they would've been called out for it. But because it's "beloved" Mateo, we don't even get "wait, you told Rita how to get into your workshop? And you've known her for only a few weeks? What were you thinking, Mateo?") Moreover, he never even apologizes for this or promises to do better/be more careful with such important, sensitive information in the future.

Even more aggravating is his behavior in "The Scepter of Night." Mateo is so eager to play the hero and claim all the glory for himself that he twice (!) disobeys a direct order/abandons the plan and goes looking for the scepter piece on his own. This directly leads to Fiero and Victor finding the scepter piece and (temporarily) stealing it. And it's really only due to luck and very conveniently-timed infighting amongst Shuriki's allies that Elena and co. are able to get the scepter piece back. While Mateo does receive some (brief) criticism, it's nowhere near the level that it should be.

Also noteworthy Elena doesn't really get particularly "mad" at him (especially considering how angry we see her get at other characters even for more minor things) . She's not truly, actually angry at Mateo (and Gabe and Naomi are only a bit angrier); she's just a little frustrated and disappointed at him in the moment. And apart from a (very short) little "do better next time" speech, Mateo doesn't face any real consequences or lingering resentment unlike other characters who do.

When Isa obeys direct orders in "Sister of Invention," she has to face consequences (Elena grounding her). Similarly, Elena holds a grudge against Esteban for days (if not weeks) after he interfered with the Feast of Friendship (a much lower stakes mistake than Mateo's imo). Moreover, it's possible to interpret Esteban's staying behind in Avalor when the others go to see the Norberg Lights as a punishment (either self-inflicted or imposed by Elena) for his actions in the previous episode.

In contrast, Mateo just gets a brief "I expected better from you" speech from Elena and Gabe jokingly assigning him push-ups as punishment (which he immediately takes back when Mateo tries to do them). I'll give Mateo a little bit of credit for actually apologizing this time (which he doesn't always do). But it's still frustrating that everyone is so ready to forgive and forget Mateo's missteps immediately while this same courtesy is seldom shown to others.

I think it's worth directly comparing a few Mateo-centric episodes with a few more similar ones that focus on other characters so that we can see how there does seem to be a noted narrative bias in his favor compared to the others.

Let's start with two "feeling kind of insecure" episodes: "Spellbound" for Mateo vs. "Naomi Knows Best" for Naomi. In the former, Mateo expresses doubt that he's capable of rising to the occasion as royal wizard. No one (except Gabe and he gets over it by the end of the episode) blames him for not having reached his full level of confidence and potential right away and not being able to immediately solve the problem. And Elena in particular (and by extension the narrative) gives him so much validation and support. Whereas in "Naomi Knows Best" (and to a lesser extent "Finders Leapers" and the "Carla-as-Rita" arc as well) the narrative "punishes" Naomi for her feelings of self-doubt. We're told that *if only* Naomi had trusted her gut instincts and stood her ground right away, Elena and co would not fallen right into the trap and that Naomi needs to screw her head back on straight and embrace confidence ASAP to fix her mistake.

When Mateo feels insecure, the narrative gives him every reassurance about how capable and special he is, that he can learn at his own pace, and his insecurity isn't really such a problem after all. When Naomi feels insecure, the narrative encourages her to get over her doubts as quickly as possible because unlike with Mateo, there's "no time" for her to wallow in self-doubt and actually the fact that she even had said doubt in the first place is what "caused" the disaster.

On a slightly different note, Naomi is also called out for taking a little free, fun time for herself in "The Last Laugh" when the group needs her, and yet somehow I have a feeling that Mateo would've been allowed to take a day off if he wanted without any protest. He complains about long hours in "Movin' on Up" and Elena gives him the big royal wizard's chambers for him to relax and unwind in. Naomi asks for one (1) day off to spend with her childhood friend for her birthday , and suddenly it's big drama. (And at the time, Naomi asked for said day off, all Elena needed from her was help doing paperwork. The Team Ash stuff came up unexpectedly.)

Similarly whenever Gabe and Mateo get their little rivalry on ("Spellbound," "Party of a Lifetime," "Captain Mateo" and a few other examples) , the narrative either presents them as equally at fault or Mateo as the only one in the right.

When Gabe brings in Bronzino to train the Royal Guards in magic, it's specifically because Mateo failed to explain how and why he was training the guards in the way he was. If he'd just explained how they were going apply the seemingly basic exercise they were doing to real magic, Gabe likely would've allowed Mateo to continue the training at his own pace.

(Also like. it's super hypocritical imo for Mateo to get annoyed at Gabe feeling impatient/impulsive about their apparent-lack-of progress when Mateo himself is easily the second most impulsive character in the show after Elena.) Mateo feels entitled to keep important information to himself (or blab it to a cute girl he barely knows) even when its no one else's best interest. He's only okay with being "cautious and patient" when he specifically is the one setting the pace. And yet, Gabe is the only one who is called out for his behavior in this episode--even though he might not have acted as he did if only Mateo had trusted him and the guards with an explanation in the first place.

And then there's just a few other "dude not cool" little moments that never really get acknowledged/Mateo never apologizes for. For instance, there a two low-key terrifying Mateo moments in "Captain Mateo" that are not only not acknowledged but are also framed in context as Mateo being just "so funny and quirky". Near the end of "Should be in Charge," Mateo magically gags Gabe so he can't protest anymore about Mateo taking over as leader of the mission. And this is after having already enchanted one of the stationary suits of armor to come to life and fight Gabe. (Gabe admittedly does lightly shove Mateo out of the way during his parts of the song, but that's still a far cry from literally drawing a sword on Mateo as Mateo does via magic to Gabe.)

It's played for laughs (The Grand Council is just smiling happily in the background throughout the scene which is so yikes), so it's easy to overlook what's actually happening. Frankly, it's pretty horrifying that Mateo's natural instinct upon his experience/authority being questioned is to literally attack and then silence. (And attack and silence someone who is supposed to be one of his best friends and closest allies at that!)

Rather than the narrative acknowledging that maybe it's a bad idea to immediately grant power to someone to someone who is so retaliatory against fairly minor criticism, the Grand Council just gives Mateo exactly what he wants and doesn't even offer a "maybe next time, let's not gag or attack our friends, okay?" alongside it. I mean sure Mateo does step down as captain at the end of the episode, but it's very specifically presented as his and Gabe's voluntary choice and not an order from Elena/the Council.

#not sure what i think about rest points but i had stronger thoughts about these ones #i also think mateo was presented as wrong in captain mateo but okay he wasn't exactly called out so okay maybe not #(...also maybe i need to rewatch crash course cause was kinda under impression that conflict in that came mostly from mateo teaching adults #late teens like children under 10)#...i also wouldn't like for him to have evil arc but that's more due to fact that i think it would be too much to have two of main #characters do that than anything else #though one thing: after scepter of night (or before like during trailer?) actually many people were thinking/worried that's gonna happen #i had like two dreams about that one being directly affected by 'naomi knows best' synopis somehow #...i think i wrote dark reprise of 'magic within you' but i had it in some notebook i lost #side note: i found out about varian from tangled the series around same time scepter of night premiered lmao #...also i just realized i'm writing fanfic in which mateo is worried it's gonna happen and gabe is kinda worried it's gonna happen and i #didn't mention that things from 'in charge' ...so i guess i kind of...didn't think too much of them...#...also kind of like to think his very quick 'nope can't do that' in lighting warrior was caused by such worry #though that particular headcanon is kinda to all wondering what is difference between dark magic and light magic and me kinda thinking #that it's like the more you use dark magic it starts possesing you? i also think that's the reason victor and carla got changed it that #episode alongside to make elena trust them more #...so with that i also think that 'chaning into stone' is outright dark magic so i do think mateo used it once #...though gotta admit it doesn't really fit with valentina using it...but maybe it's little different when you are changing something back #to stone?#or i guess valentina used dark magic too. well #elena of avalor

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lotte22324 · 4 months ago

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A Night Out

Summary: This is inspired by Episode 4x9 "Pick-Up“. You guys know what I'm talking about, the one where they are trying to catch a pick-up artist who murders his victims and where that iconic bar scene happens with Spencer and the bartender, with the magic and all :) You are a part of the BAU and are assigned to the same club as Morgan and Reid, to find out if anyone knows the unsub. But Reid‘s miserable attempts at making conversation make you everything but focused on the task at hand. Leading to a confession and also a lil kiss (yk I am a sucker for a first kiss scenario!).

This is just basically fluffy all through, a bit of hurt/comfort :) This is for all the girlies who have kind of low self-esteem cause lets be honest, we all doubt ourselves once in a while. Also, this is most definitely not how in-ear monitoring works, honest to god, this just worked for the plot. So bare with me for potential technical inaccuracies :) TW.: Y/N is self-deprecating

You had flown into Atlanta two days ago, now you were sitting in the precinct with your team in front of a very poorly looking suspect picture.

„No one's gonna recognize this guy,“ you said helplessly.

„If you know him, then you’ll recognize him“ Rossi reassured you but you were still not very convinced.

„No matter, Morgan, Reid and y/l/n, go to Club 'Aqua‘ as normal agents, ask around, if anyone has seen anything important and warn people!“ said Hotch. "Emily, you already know what you have to do, as Morgen already so graciously pointed out earlier, the Pick-Up Artist is attracted to you“.

You felt a little sting after that comment. Even though you didn’t want to be found attractive by that arrogant narcissist, you still felt bad about not being seen the same way as Emily. Ohhh, this was so stupid, why did you care about that? Well, you were still living in a man‘s world where the opinion of men was apparently worth more than of others. It made you feel shame and guilt to think like that but you couldn’t help yourself, you wanted to get noticed by men as well, mostly just one man…but that didn’t matter right now. You glanced over to the man that had been haunting your nights and caught him staring back at you. He offered you an awkward smile but let his head fall as soon as you returned the smile. So that you both didn't notice the blush creeping up both your cheeks.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Later that evening, you were all at the club, Emily and Jordan looking pretty at their table, while you, Morgan and Reid were questioning and warning visitors. Everyone was wearing a mic and earplugs. You were connected with one another over the in-ear monitoring radio, so you heard what the others were saying as long as you stayed on their frequency. It was kinda distracting but in a dangerous situation, it could save lives.

Having set the in-ear device on Emilys mic, you heard her and Jordan make fun of the pick-up artist you encountered earlier today. The female club-goers (and also a few male attendees) were eyeing him up and down. You were not convinced how the learned “charme skills” would work on anyone. Who would find a man attractive that belittled you so much? The weird trick with the "the camera really adds 10 pounds, doesn't it?“ just seemed douchey and would be an instant turn-off for you. You liked a gentleman, one that didn’t make you feel worth less than him, one with intelligence and maybe a bit of awkwardness. Who doesn’t like an awkward genius, you know?

Switching through the channels on your in-ear monitoring radio (totally not looking for Spencer's voice), you finally heard his rambling. Your favorite awkward genius was in the middle of explaining the situation to a group of women. After describing the man to them and showing a picture, he started rambling on about the dangers of night clubs: "When you think about the nature of serial crimes, it's amazing that there aren’t more predators in Night Clubs! I mean the excessive amounts of alcohol, countless opportunities for date rape drugs, not to mention surprisingly risky behaviour being persued. Alright, so who wants a flyer?“

Subtle, Spencer. Based on his confused look that you caught on his face, after looking for him in the crowd, nobody wanted one. Someone should have really taught him some social skills before letting him out to a club. You stifled a laugh after that interaction you just witnessed and continued on your path, asking around if anyone knew the unsub. After a few fruitless conversations, you found your way to Morgan and Reid to find out if they had gotten anything useful.

"So, how’s it going?“ asked Morgan, looking at you and Reid. But before you could give an answer, Spencer already started talking: "not good, I gave the profile to one woman, she asked if I was the unsub. How are you guys doing?“

Your brain stopped for a second, so did your feet. What did Spencer just say? You busted out laughing after his comment, just to get some weird side glances from other people around you.

"Why are you laughing?“ Spencer asked.

"I don’t know, maybe because your attempts at speaking with pretty women are hilarious?“ you pushed out while holding your belly from laughing too hard. That right there was comedy gold and Spencer didn’t even realize it. Instead, he turned red as a tomato, with a hint of hurt in his eyes and turned away from you, just to meet Morgan's amused look.

"So, how many phone numbers did you get?“ Spencer asked him.

"None, I'm working a case!“ Both you and Spencer raised your eyebrows in knowing suspicion, not believing a single word that left his lips.

"Fine, I’ve got four numbers offered but I didn’t take none!“ Morgan defended himself. You start laughing again. This time Morgan shot you a scolding look and you caught yourself again.

"Alright, lemme school you real quick. What you have to do with these ladies, just take control over the conversation. When you’re talking, what makes you feel like an expert?“

„Uhh, statistics!“

You couldn’t believe his answer. Statistics? For real? Spencer knew so little about striking up a conversation and you were still falling for him, head over heels. Well, he didn’t know that, but still, how did you fall for this man again? At the thought of him talking with an attractive woman in a club about statistics, out of all the topics he could have picked, you lost it again. You started laughing loudly and excused yourself as soon as you saw Morgan's annoyed look. Holding your laugh in, you stepped outside the club as fast as you could. As soon as you were outside, you laughed even more.

"You are aware that we can all hear you, y/n?“ said Emily, suddenly standing next to you outside and you slowly stopped.

You turned off your mic in response and took out your ear piece, not feeling the need to listen to more of Derek's “flirting lessons” for Spencer.

"I‘m sorry, it was just so fucking funny what Reid said“ you smirked, Emily smirking back.

"I know, I could barely keep my laughs to myself“ she confessed.

"He really doesn’t understand how normal conversations work, not to mention flirting“ you replied instantly.

"And he’s still got you wrapped around his finger“ she answered dryly, looking at you with an amused look.

"No, he doesn’t!“

"Suuureee, you do understand that even though I promised not to profile you all, I still subconsciously do. I see you stumbling over your words when he asks specifically you a question, I see your flustered face when he looks up from his desk just to look at you, I see your little reaching for his hand whenever something horrible happens. And that all concludes to just one outcome: you, my love, have a big fat crush on our Doctor.“ Emily deduced with a satisfying look on her face. She deduced it completely correctly, obviously, but you were still trying to deny it all.

"Yeeeahhh, sureee, you got me all figured out, Spencer isn’t even my type, Em!“ you answered a little too quickly, with not enough confidence to fool anyone, especially not a fellow profiler.

Emily's skeptical look, followed by an even more skeptical sound, made you look away from her and fumble with your bag.

Wait. You looked over to Prentiss' ear, her hair tucked behind it. You saw the wire entangled in her hair, she was still wearing her hidden mic and ear device. Oh no, no, no. Everybody who was on her in-ear monitoring radio just heard her little speech about your peculiar behavior around Reid. Hotchner definitely heard it since he was monitoring us. Reid might have heard that you had a crush on him. Not just a little, but a big, fat crush! Emily saw your panicked look and realized her own mistake too late.

"Fuck, I didn’t mean to-" she took her ear piece out.

Hurt and panicky, you cut her off, not allowing her to finish her probably half-assed apology: "you just told Hotchner that I like Spencer; you might have even told him. How am I supposed to look at them ever again?“ you asked frantically, turning red, holding your head in your hands the second that you do so.

"Guys! We might not have gotten any new leads but Spencer got a girls number, he actually flirted with a real woman!“ Morgan bursted out the club's door, smiling brightly and padding Reid proudly on his shoulder. Jordan was following them, clutching her arms, not knowing how cold it would be outside. Spencer walked behind Morgan, looking a little more accomplished than usual. Maybe they didn’t hear Emily's profile? Maybe they were too hyped up about Spencer's flirting abilities.

"Yeah, I,I used magic! And she actually liked it.“ Spencer added coyly, a blush emblazoned on his cheeks. You felt a sting in your heart. Of course, she liked the magic, Spencer was extremely charming when he was talking about the things he liked or did the things he was good at. He had shown you multiple magic tricks already which always made your heart flutter. But now, thinking of magic, your stomach turned. You weren’t the only one being charmed by magic Spencer. Of course you weren’t. You flashed him a smile but couldn't mask the hurt that was shining through your eyes.Him being so excited about another person made you sad. You felt Emily's sorry-look on you and shivered due to the low temperature. Nonetheless, you could not drive in a car with Spencer now. To be honest, you wanted to be as far away as possible from him.

"Uhm, I think, i‘m gonna walk to the hotel, I need to clear my head a little“ you said hastily, starting to walk in the right direction. Everyone looked confused but no one dared to question your choice. It was gonna be a nice 30 minute walk where you could get yourself together before having to face the others again. You might catch a cold but it was worth it.

"I’ll come with! You shouldn’t be walking the streets alone at night and I also, uhm, still need to get my steps in!“ Spencer hustled over to your side and started to walk with you. Great, amazing, this was exactly what you needed. You slumped your shoulders and pulled your lips into a thin line.

"Fine“ you answered, quickening your pace, not caring if Reid could keep up. He was the one that you wanted to get away from and now he was walking right beside you. For the next 30 minutes. You could curl up and die at the thought of that.

After walking a few minutes in silence, you started to slow down, admitting defeat that you wouldn’t get rid of him. His breathing slowed down, looking grateful, he never was the sportiest out of all of you.

"Sooo, what’s her name?“ you asked, uninterested.

"Whose name?“ Spencer seemed confused.

"The girl whose number you got?“

"Well, technically, I don’t have her number but she has mine and I told her that she could call me…. I don’t know her name either.“ Spencer answered honestly.

"It doesn’t matter, I am not interested in her anyways, I just wanted to know if Morgan‘s theory of controlling the conversation would be true. And, I guess, he was right. I was in my comfort zone, doing something I liked and she instantly felt attracted to that confidence“ he confessed.

You didn’t answer him, what should you say to that? Yeaaahhh, I like your confidence too! Whenever you do magic, I also find that super attractive. Oh and by the way, do you wanna go out with me instead of her? And also, when she calls, do you wanna casually give me the phone to tell her that he’s in a happy relationship and that she should back the fuck off? No. You would never say that and also, the other woman has done nothing wrong. Why are you so angry with her? He flirted with her, she simply flirted back, as one does. Being mad at her is senseless, it's better to be mad at Spencer and yourself. I mean, who were you kidding? Spencer Reid would never fall for you, you are so deep in the friendzone, he probably does not even see you as a real woman.

"Did you get any numbers offered to you in the club?“ Spencer asked, pulling you out of your self-pitying thoughts.

"No, I don’t usually get numbers just handed out to me“ you answered sarcastically but truthfully.

"Why not?“ Spencer furrowed his eyebrows.

"Cause, I don’t usually get hit on, you know. People need to get to know me before asking me out, my looks alone simply don’t cut it.“ you admitted, shrugging your shoulders. You turned around the next street corner, blinded by the suddenly very bright street lamps but kept on walking. Spencer grabbed your wrist and made you stop in an instant.

You turned your head irritated: "What is it?“

"That can’t be true.“

"What can’t be true?“ you asked, still irritated by his grip around your arm but not taking any action against it.

"That people don’t ask you out all the time just when they see you. You’re, You’re beautiful.“

Your face turned a crimson red color and you looked down onto the pavement.

"Well thank you, Doctor Reid, but you might be the only one who thinks so…“ you said out loud, without thinking about it first. You shook off his hand and kept on walking, wanting to leave this conversation behind you.

"Come on, we do wanna get back at some point, ay?“ you asked him, a smile playing on your lips. Spencer's shocked look turns into a smile as soon as he sees yours.

"Okay, but just for the record, I am very sure that everyone thinks that you are beautiful, inside and out!“ Spencer reassured his view but you didn't believe him, as always when someone complimented you.

Walking side by side, you finally decided to change the topic and asked about the last book he read. Instantly, his eyes shined bright and he started rambling on about this book that you’ve never heard about. Although his mouth and his right hand were moving enthusiastically, his hand closest to you stayed on his side. In the next ten minutes, he inched closer and closer to you., at least it seemed like it. With every millimeter that he won, you didn't back away. You wanted him to get closer, god, if you had the choice, he would be as close as humanly possible at all times to you. You let your hands fall out of your coat pockets, dangerously close to his. They graze lightly. He kept on talking about the main character and his complicated love interest. Your hands graze again. You tried to keep calm, listen to his explanation of the story. They touch again, this time longer. You instinctively held out your pinky, your body yearning for his touch. It touched the back of his hand, slowly making its way down. Spencer mirrored your movement, your pinkies finally interlocking. You held your breath, fearing that any change would destroy this fragile image. Both of you kept on walking, he kept on talking.

"Y/n? Are you even listening?“ Spencer asked hesitantly, his voice a little shakier than usual.

"Yeah, sure I am! You were talking about Flavio and his little girlfriend, uhm, Adriana?“ you answered him, completely aware that you were, in fact, not listening to him.

"Arianne. It almost seems like you just wanted to get me talking, so you wouldn’t have to,“ his jawline tensed up but he didn't let go of your pinky.

"I-I, that might have been my plan.“ you defeatedly answered him. But before he could answer you back, you were standing in front of the hotel.

"There you guys are, finally, I was already afraid that you got lost!“ Morgan said, pushing himself off of the car he was leaning on. You let go in an instant of Spencer's pinky and took a step to the side, not realizing how close you were standing.

"Yeah no, our doctor over here is just not the fastest, even though he has such long legs!“ you laughed, Morgan flashing you a signature smile.

"Come on, let's get some sleep, tomorrow will probably be a long day again.“ Morgan yawned and started walking towards the entrance of the hotel. Both, you and Reid, followed him and started to walk up to your rooms. Stepping into the elevator, Morgan had to get to the third floor, you and Reid to the fifth. As soon as the elevator dinged on the third, Morgan waved tiredly and wished you both a good night. The ride up was quiet but the tension between you two seemed to thicken. You stepped out of the elevator awkwardly, Spencer following you sheepishly.

"I have to go to the right,“ he said, looking down onto his hands.

"Oh, I have to go left“ you answered, the disappointment in your voice clear, you never were the best at keeping your emotions hidden.

Spencer looked up at you, opening and closing his mouth, as if he wanted to say something but didn’t know how. You gave him a smile: "alright, good night then.“

You turned around and started walking towards your room when a sentence dropped from Spencer's lips that made you stop in your tracks.

"Was Emily right?“

You turned around to find him walking towards you, in the opposite direction of his room. You gulped. Your eyes shifted panicky, trying to find the right answer to that question. You could simply lie, say that she was wrong, profilers do get things wrong sometimes.

But you felt yourself opening your mouth: "yes, Spencer, she was right.“ you looked down onto the floor, your stomach full with knots.

"But that doesn’t have to change anything between us, you know, I know you don’t like me like that and I will get over this, easily!“ you blabbered. Yeeeeahhhh, sureee, that is gonna be super easy. You don’t believe your own words, knowing the feelings that you have for this man. It’s like nothing you ever felt before, it feels like whenever he looks at you, the world stops for a second. But he doesn’t need to know that, as far as he is concerned, it's just a little work crush.

"What if I don’t want you to get over it?“

The world actually stopped or at least it felt like it again. You drew your eyes up and met his gaze. He looked completely serious, he was not fucking with you right now?

"What do you mean, Spencer?“ you asked hesitantly.

"Well, y/n, as Emily put it so nicely: I have a big, fat crush on you too.“ Spencer timidly smiled at you, ears turning red, stepping closer.

"Or why would you think that I was trying to hold your hand the whole damn way here?“ he confessed, holding his hand out to yours. You followed his movement and took his hand, this time with more clear intention, and interlocked your fingers together. You couldn't fight the smile creeping up your face, neither could he. His other hand moved up and hesitantly touched your cheek. Your eyes shifted up and down, from his brown eyes to his pink lips. He fully stared at your mouth, not concealing his clear want at all, making you chuckle slightly.

"What’s so funny?“ he asked, his voice quiet and distracted.

"You can’t stop staring, can you?“ you blushed, surprised by the boldness of your claim.

"Nope.“

And that’s all it took for you to lean over and place your lips on his. For Spencer, it felt like the world was stopping. It was a shy kiss but you both slowly found a rhythm. Your hands found their way to his neck, his hands fell down and started pulling you closer by your hips. After a few moments, you had to stop, trying to catch your breath. The stupid smiles that painted both of your faces made both of you laugh.

"You know, y/n, I can never stop staring. Whenever I ask you a question, whenever you look up from your desk and especially whenever you hold my hand.“ Spencer confessed, his smile and his words making you blush, for the 100th time tonight. Instead of answering, you simply pulled him into a tight embrace that he happily reciprocated. You sighed heavily, the tension of today falling off, feeling safe in his arms.

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