#mind the ratings!!!!!!!!!

[newttxt]

pls read the zosan fic “utilities included” and enjoy sanji making his own life as miserable as possible in plain view of his new roommate

from ch. 1 of utilities included (mind the tags and rating)

masterpost

[cubbihue]

Wait, hang on. So is the reason why Timmy is a Pixie right now is because he's not a full fledged fairy yet? How long does it take before he makes that transition?

Nobody's quite sure!! It's been so long since the last taken child, so long since the last successful taken child, that not even the Fairy Council is sure when Timmy can become a fairy. They can't put a specific number on it.

He's a full fledged Pixie though. So, that's something! They suspect he can become a Fairy once his body can handle the same level of magic that a Fairy has.

Or at least until Timmy's completely shed of everything that made him Human. For now, though, he's feeling magic growth pains, and he has two teen gremlins raiding his kitchen.

Bitties Series: [Start] > [Previous] > [Next]

[kabukiaku]

caved and put aside what I was doing to draw terzo getting hickies from omega. this ask prompted me to do so.

[ecstarry]

Fic: Home

When Regulus first mentioned he was moving out of Sirius and Remus’ place, his brother insisted it wasn't necessary. But today, on his last day, Sirius couldn't hide his excitement about living alone with his boyfriend. Regulus was genuinely happy for them, though what bothered him most was leaving their cozy flat behind and getting used to a new living arrangement.

Moving out meant finding a new place and a new roommate. Regulus had enough money to live solo, but the thought of loneliness irked him more than anything. Sirius knew this, which is why an hour after Regulus announced his departure, he received a text from James Potter.

[Jamie] Come live with me

Regulus smirked at his phone. James had saved his contact with that nickname, hoping Regulus would feel guilty about being mean to him. He didn’t, but that didn't mean he wasn't growing fond of James.

[Regulus] Where are your manners, Potter? Shouldn’t you at least ask me out first?

[Jamie] You’re such a princess. I have a spare room and you need a place to live.

[Regulus] So you’re my knight in shining armor coming to my rescue then?

[Jamie] I mean, I do have the looks for it.

[Jamie] Just take the offer.

[Jamie] Don’t even try to say you don’t like my flat when I know for a FACT that you do.

[Regulus] Fine. You sure?

[Jamie] Positive, princess.

AAAAH IM SO EXCITED

Read the complete work here

Snippet of the fic based on the concept that @noasmirrorball shared

[silksongeveryday]

Drawing Hornet everyday until Silksong comes out - Day 426

The hornet council attempting to summon Silksong

[unionizedwizard]

OBVIOUSLY there's no "canon" azem/azem name beside what little glimpses of them we've been privy to, and even then it's like, basically hearsay at this point and for a really good reason and that's an awesome idea and i love it

HOWEVER, the fact argos exists at all is a STRONG point in favor of the "azem is canonically odysseus coded" theory. what if you had been sent away to fight and you got lost and kept wandering and ending up in weird situations and basically losing your mind and were known for being cunning and tough and good with people and with a lot of hidden skills and you were called The Traveler. and then when you managed to get back home again only your dog still remembered & recognized you. what then

(it's NOT a 1:1 equivalence okay it's about the symbolism. you understand)

[theunholyvirginemilyprentiss]

EMILY PRENTISS’ GOODREADS:

THE HOLY BIBLE

multiple authors

★☆☆☆☆ 0.1

Overly-preachy narrative, too many plot holes. Profiled God as a malignant narcissist with an inferiority complex. Can’t blame Satan for lashing out at has dad like that, rebellion is typical of scapegoated children in a toxic family dynamic.

THE CATCHER IN THE RYE

J.D. Salinger

★★★★★ 5.0

Didn’t read it, five stars anyway because its reputation precedes it.

HOW TO FIND AT-RISK KIDS WHO GREW UP IN A 360-DEGREE ENVIRONMENT OF FAMILY VIOLENCE

David Rossi, Jason Gideon

★★☆☆☆ 2.0

Literally ruining my life. But two stars because I was high when I read it and it made my brain feel fuzzy in a good way.

THE LORD OF THE FLIES

William Golding

★★★☆☆ 0.3

Strong concept, disappointing lack of women.

SLAUGHTERHOUSE-FIVE

Kurt Vonnegut

★★★★★ 5.0

It’s so freaky-deaky, I love it.

Check out my Masterlist for more BAU scenarios

[caribous]

[see-arcane]

"Pfft, who even cares about Jonathan Harker?"

"What does he even add besides, like, a skinny little intro and giving us a reason to see the vampire chicks?"

"He's so boring. There's literally nothing to say about him!"

As an aside.

I have multiple editions of Dracula. The biggest comes in at 399 pages. The smallest, a palm-sized hardcover, has 463.

As of today, in Harker, Jonathan has just now escaped from Castle Dracula and started his marathon run.

...

There is something fundamentally awry within me, I think :)

[nerdylizj]

Lanterns line the exterior of the restaurant, swinging in the light autumn night breeze and casting on orange haze into the empty street. Curfew is nearing and Katara shouldn’t miss the last monorail back to the Upper Ring. She can’t miss the last monorail. Where would she stay tonight?  With Zuko and Iroh? The thought of returning to the Upper Ring in the morning and waving at Sokka – hey, no worries, I stayed with Zuko and Iroh last night! – is funny. Her brother would squawk and Toph would laugh and Aang would gawk. They wouldn’t understand. She barely understands.  Maybe it’s not funny.

read chapter 13 or start chapter 1

[distort-opia]

Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016) #48

Alright. "When I want to spawn I'll ask Bruce out on a proper date" is just so fucking unhinged and we don't talk about it enough!!

First of all, insane thing to say to Jason Todd of all people. Imply that you've kinda been dating Bruce until now, just not properly?? LMFAO. What even qualifies as a proper date? I want to know so badly what sort of date Joker would take Bruce on. Secondly, Joker says "Bruce", not "Batman"; I'd say it's surprising and make fun of the fact that Joker doesn't see Batman as breedable, but it's more likely that he defaulted to Bruce because he's the humanity inside Batman, and the source of the paternal instincts. As in, he doesn't see Batman as a prospective father, but Bruce. And thirdly, he says "when I want to spawn", potentially implying he'd be the pregnant one in this scenario. In this essay I will--

[holopossums]

omg older Krow real??

Future Boy gets more Future'd to be my age, how fun! :3

but i did put my entire gender envy into one man so i'm gonna pass out now

edit: he has an official reference now that looks a little different!

[laniidae-passerine]

Danver’s specific brand of racism is so intrenched in love it’s fascinating. Her daughter is precious to her and her daughter is Indigenous and in this town, an Indigenous woman is not viewed as a precious thing. They are abused and raped and murdered and therefore, being white is the ‘better’ choice. She is actively whitewashing her daughter, not only because she’s afraid of what she doesn’t understand and because of typical coloniser mentality, but because she doesn’t want to lose her. Danvers can’t distance Indigenous identity from white violence and it’s killing what she loves.

[fiodoodlebug]

I AM SCREAMING?????

[petite-phthora]

Please don't shake the cat

[DP x DC fic]

[Love at first... murder? - part 13]

<< Prev | Next >>

Part 1

Ao3

---

Private chat nicknames:

RedHood = Jason

Danny = Danny

---

Private chat

RedHood: *picture*

RedHood: this yours???

---

Seeing the picture of Ellie clamped onto Red Hood’s arm Danny lets out a sigh while rubbing his forehead. He takes a few seconds to look at the picture while deciding on how to reply.

---

Private chat

Danny: you don’t happen to be in Mexico right now by any chance, do you?

RedHood: No.

RedHood: I was out patrolling when I was suddenly bitten by her.

RedHood: Thought it might have been a criminal or stray cat or something like that at first.

RedHood: I was not expecting a feral teenager, but I can’t say this is the first time it’s happened.

Danny: damn, she was supposed to be in Mexico 😕😥

Danny: I guess this is what she was trying to tell me with that cryptic message she sent me huh

Danny: and the stray cat analogy isn’t too far off to be perfectly honest 🤔

RedHood: So you know her?

RedHood: Can you help me get her off? I’ve tried prying but she’s got some sick ass jaw strength.

RedHood: Which would have been pretty cool any other time, but it’s currently not really working in my favor.

Danny: I’m so sorry about her 😓 😓

Danny: we’ve been trying to teach her to ask for consent first

Danny: but it’s still a work in progress 😅

Danny: of course I'll help you get her off!! 😊🙃

RedHood: Great! You’re at your apartment, right?

RedHood: I’ll be there in two shakes.

Danny: please don’t shake the cat 😰

Danny: she’ll get grumpy and might latch on even tighter

Danny: I’ll come to you instead 🙃

Danny: you said you were patrolling, so crime alley, right? 🤔🤔

RedHood: Well, yes, but I doubt you’ll be able to get up where I am right now.

RedHood: Let me at least come down to the ground first and I’ll tell you how to get here.

RedHood: Danny?

---

Jason looks down at his unread messages with a slight frown. He puts his phone away and looks back at the teenager on his arm.

He gives his arm a small shake, causing her to growl at him which immediately makes him stop.

Right… No shaking the cat.

Jason lets out a weary sigh before looking down over the edge of the building to the ground below. He’s trying to think of the best way to get down with only one functional arm when a voice breaks him out of his reverie.

“Hey, Hood. I’m here!”

He turns around, slightly alarmed that there’s a second person who managed to sneak up on him tonight.

Damn, he’s getting rusty

Though from anyone whom he had been expecting to see, he had not been expecting to see the guy he messaged a minute ago standing behind him on the roof.

“How did you get here so quickly? And for that matter, how did you even get up here?” Jason asks confused.

“Oh, I flew” is Danny’s casual response, which gives Jason more questions than have been answered. But before he can decide whether he should bother asking for clarification Danny already moves on to the next topic.

“Anyway, let’s see what we can do about this,” he says, approaching Jason’s arm and the girl that’s hanging off of it.

“Good luck,” Jason says, holding out his arm a little better and watching bemused as Danny and the teen have a stare-down.

“Ellie, what did we say about biting others?”

The teen, Ellie, narrows her eyes and growls at him. Danny just crosses his arms and gives her an unimpressed stare.

“Nah-ah, you have to let him go. We ask before we bite someone. It’s called consent. Don’t make me get Jazz to give you another lecture”

It’s clear to Jason that Danny’s attempt at talking to her isn’t working when the teen proceeds to glance at Jason calculatingly before giving Danny a challenging look and biting down harder.

Apparently, it’s clear to Danny as well, as the next thing he does is let out a put-upon sigh before declaring “Well, I gave you a chance. Guess we’ll have to do this the hard way”

Danny then grabs a hold of her and tries pulling her off of him.

What is his life? Jason thinks as he’s standing there while Danny tries to physically pull the teenage girl, who decided his arm looked like a nice snack, off of him.

Though luckily for him, it seems to work as not a few seconds later Danny has pulled her off of his arm and is now holding the teenage girl with a bloody mouth up by her armpits.

Danny sets her down with a sigh but before he can speak up, the teen crosses her arms and levels Jason with a sharp look that makes him straighten up.

“Thou winneth this round, Red-Helmed Knight of the Night. Though thou should be prepareth, as the upcoming trials will be even more toilsome” Ellie declares while pointing at him, uncaring of the blood on her face.

“And I,” She points a finger back at herself for emphasis, ”Sir Ellie of the Infinite Realms, will—” she gets cut off when a fly enters her mouth.

Danny moves to help her but she holds up a hand to stop him, using her other hand to thump on her chest a few times.

She spits the dislodged fly out onto the floor and glares at it.

“Curse you! Foiling my monologuing once again!” she yells after the fly as it flies off.

Right…

Jason turns to Danny.

“So is she your sister?” he asks curiously. And totally not trying to fish for more information about Danny and his family.

Instead of Danny answering the question though, Ellie cuts him off.

“I’m his love child with the mayor of our town.”

Danny gives her a disgusted look.

“Ellie—”

She looks back at Danny with a shit-eating grin on her face.

Yeah, definitely siblings.

“I love my dads!” she says proudly, her eyes still on Danny.

Danny gives her a deadpan look in response before it changes to a more mischievous one.

“Oh, I’m sure Vlad would love to hear all about how you reclaimed him as a father figure—”

“Oh Ancients, no. Don’t even joke about that” She fake gags at him before turning back to Jason.

“Can I change my answer? I’m his bodyguard” She says, pointing her thumb at Danny.

That makes both Danny and Jason raise an eyebrow at her, though Jason’s can’t be seen through the helmet. They speak up at the same time.

“A bodyguard, huh?”

“No, you’re not, that’s Frighty”

Danny’s statement makes Jason pause and turn to look at him.

He’s got a bodyguard?

Ellie shakes her head happily.

“Nope! I took over the position. My knightly title isn’t just for show, y’know? I earned it fair and square!”

“When did this even happen? And why was I not told?” Danny asks, bewilderment covering his face.

Jason stays silent as he tries to make sense of the conversation.

“About…” Ellie takes a moment to think about it “3 months ago? I think it was when you were dealing with some time chores. And I thought it’d be a nice surprise, so… Surprise!” she exclaims, doing some jazz hands at the end of the sentence.

“What did you even do?”

“I snuck up on him and threw a Fenton Wii remote at his head which knocked him out cold. It counted as a win so I earned the position by right of conquest and gained my knighthood” She says with a shrug.

“Huh… think that would’ve worked for Pariah Dark as well? Would’ve made things so much easier…”

Ellie gives another careless shrug as Danny lets out a small reminiscent sigh. Meanwhile, Jason stands awkwardly to the side.

“Well, either way, I’m proud of you. Do you have a video?”

“Tucker filmed it for me, yeah”

“Nice”

They high-five with grins on their faces. At this point, Jason lets out a small cough which has the Fenton siblings turn around startled and proceed to then give him identical sheepish smiles.

They really look like they could be twins…

“Ah, sorry Red Hood. And again, I’m sorry for Ellie.” Danny says, rubbing the back of his neck with a small blush on his face.

“I’ll take her back home. And uhh… see you next time?”

Jason gives him a smile from under his helmet.

“Sure, if you’re still up for that next date?” Jason trails off with some hope.

His words make Danny’s blush darken.

“Ah uh, yeah! Yeah, of course! The next date! Uhmm, I’ll text you! Or you can text me. That’s fine too!”

Next to him, Ellie rolls her eyes and makes some fake gagging motions. She then grabs Danny by his arm and starts dragging him away.

“Come on, Loverboy. You can and your paramour can flirt later. When I’m not there… and after he’s passed my trials” she says, muttering the latter part low enough that Jason can’t hear. But, judging by the way Danny’s head snaps back to her and how his brows furrow, he did hear.

Just as Jason goes to reply, giving them a thank you and a goodbye of his own, perhaps even an offering to help them get down from the roof, he picks up on movement behind him.

Quickly turning around has him regretting not leaving the rooftop earlier, as he watches the Bats (and birds) land.

Fuck.

---

Taglist:

@i-always-say-yea   @uraniumwizard    @why-must-i-be-like-this   @griffinthing @i23432i @imsotiredfanficlovertm

[t3chborb]

It be Ramattra's birthday today (the first one since the cast's bdays were revealed), so obviously I had to make something special for such a monumental occasion~

The art may appear a little strange, given the pic's purpose. Shouldn't it be a bit more obvious that it's a birthday celebration? What's going on here?

Well...

Let's just say this art is indeed special. If you want the context, you'll have to read @korpuskat's "Date of Manufacture" (Tumblr / AO3) ;)